Classic Radio 10-07-25 - Fred and Charlie Audition, A Camel, and Higher Education - Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Cox

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
Now the greatest radio shows of all time.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
Huspense, Shadow Note Washington calling David Honey.

Speaker 3 (00:19):
Count as my classic radio theater, the Great Elderslide Zipper
McGee and Molly Dragones Guns Alone rang Zoe.

Speaker 4 (00:29):
Now step back into a time machine.

Speaker 5 (00:31):
It's your host, Wyatt Cox.

Speaker 6 (00:34):
Good evening friend, Savionna Tancu.

Speaker 7 (00:39):
Comedy on this Tuesday episode of The Fred Allen Show
and the Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet, both from nineteen
forty five. We'll have a nineteen fifty episode of Hoosier
Hot Shots and The Milton Borough Show from nineteen forty seven.
Will wrap it all up with Claudia. That's what's coming
up on this Tuesday, seventh day of October two hundred,

(00:59):
eightieth day of the year, eighty five days left. Christopher
Columbus missed Florida when he changed course on this date
in fourteen ninety two, and in fifteen forty two, explorer
Cabrillo discovered Catalina Island off the California coast. In seventeen
sixty five, the stamp Back Congress convened in New York City.

(01:21):
In seventeen seventy seven, the Americans beat the British in
the Battle of Second Saratoga and the Battle of Bemis
Heights in the Revolutionary War. Three years later, the Battle
of King's Mountain, American Patriot militia defeated Loyalist irregulars led
by British Colonel Patrick Ferguson in South Carolina. Eighteen sixteen,

(01:45):
the first doubled X steam boat, the Washington, arrived in
New Orleans. In eighteen sixty four, the Battle of Darby
Town Road, the Confederate forces attempt to regain ground that
had been lost around Richmond toward it in the Civil War.
Eighteen sixty eight, Columbia University held opening Day ceremonies, their
initial student enrollment at four hundred and twelve, the most

(02:08):
at any American university to that date. On this date.
In nineteen twenty two, WNJ Radio in Newark, New Jersey,
and WGY in Schenectady, New York linked up to broadcast
The World Series. Nineteen thirty eight, Germany demanded all Jewish
passports b stamped with the letter J. In nineteen forty,

(02:30):
Germany invaded Romania. In nineteen forty two, US and British
governments announced the establishment of the United Nations. In nineteen
forty three, Japan executed one hundred American civilian prisoners on
Wake Island. One of the earliest television shows for theatre
debut on this date in nineteen forty nine.

Speaker 8 (03:00):
Ford Theater presented by Ford producer of The Thunderbird, Ya
Engine and the Ford Dealers of Your Community, Who Tonight
Bring You Scott Brady and Phyllis Kirk in tim Can
Skipper with William Leslie.

Speaker 7 (03:20):
The show actually had a pretty good run. They ran
from nineteen forty nine on this date until nineteen fifty seven.
In the early days, that was a remarkable run. A
US forces crossed the thirty eighth Parallel Parallel in Korea
on this dated nineteen fifty in the Korean Conflict. American
Bandstand debut on this dated nineteen fifty seven Lissen Larry

(03:43):
Less Aligart's rather recording a bandstand Boogie's the theme of
the show until nineteen sixty nine, when they brought it
back with a disco version. From seventy four to seventy
seven and then Barry Manilow complete with lyrics this theme
until the end of the show in nineteen eighty six.
Far Side of The moon was seen for the first

(04:04):
time on this date in nineteen fifty nine, courtesy of
Russia's Luna III. Second Kennedy Nixon debate on this date
in nineteen sixty Cold War Policy the second to four
scheduled debates. In nineteen sixty three, President Kennedy signed ratification
for the Partial Test Ban Treaty with Russia.

Speaker 9 (04:25):
Soberly and unremittingly, this nation, but never this nation alone,
has sought the doorway to effective dislomon into a world
where peace is secure.

Speaker 7 (04:36):
And I hope you'll forgive me for not being totally
historically accurate at that time. It was the Soviet Union
or the USSR, not just Russia. In my opinion and
feeling at this time, the opinions of the old and
the attitudes of the old USSR are more reflected today

(04:57):
by the nation of Russia than they were by many
of the other nations in the Soviet Union. Also on
the state, in nineteen sixty three, Hurricane Flora hit Haiti
and the Dominican Republic, seven thousand people killed. Hollywood adopted
a movie rating system on this date in nineteen sixty eight.

(05:18):
In nineteen eighty two, on this date, Catz opened on Broadway,
running for nearly eighteen years before closing in two thousand.
In nineteen eighty four, NFL running back Walter Peyton broke
Jim Brown's rushing record second and nine.

Speaker 10 (05:39):
Hey, He've got it, ladies and gentlemen, Walter Peyton has
two sets honey, initial Football League career.

Speaker 6 (05:53):
Let's see, looker.

Speaker 11 (05:56):
This means a lot to me today because not only
did the Office of Life and play as hard as
they could.

Speaker 12 (06:01):
As we also put points on the board.

Speaker 13 (06:02):
What we've been trying to do to win is the
key thing.

Speaker 7 (06:06):
Tim Ryan with the call on CBS. Peyton finished his
career with sixteen thou seven hundred and twenty six running yards.
He passed away in nineteen ninety nine liver disease. He
was just forty five. In nineteen eighty five, Palestinian gunman
hijacked the Italian cruise ship a Kia Loro with more

(06:26):
than four hundred people on board. The terrorist eventually killed
a wheelchair bound American passenger, Leon Klingoff. Shortly after the hijacking,
the ship's captain radio to coastal communications station in Sweden.

Speaker 14 (06:41):
He told us that the ship that's been hijacked by
an unknown number of Palestinian rebels that demanded fifty persons
to be released from Israel.

Speaker 7 (06:52):
The Palestinian hijackers received some dare I say it they
receives some inadequate justice. Look it up the Achille laurel
acchi ll e la u r O. It was a

(07:12):
horrible hijacking on this date by Palestinians. In nineteen eighty five.
Fox News Channel launched on this date. In nineteen ninety six,
Young Brands bounded then as Trichon Global Restaurants when Pizza Hut, KFC,
Taco Bell All spun off from Pepsi. It was on

(07:34):
this date twenty four years ago the US and Britain
launched air strikes against Taliban positions and Osama bin Laden's
training camps in Afghanistan. President Bush said it was an
effort to bring down the ruling Taliban in support of terrorism.

Speaker 15 (07:51):
Carefully targeted actions are designed to disrupt the use of
Afghanistan as a terrorist base of operations and to attack
the military harry capability of the Taliban regime.

Speaker 7 (08:03):
Me and while Osama bin Laden praise God for the
September eleventh terror attacks in a videotape statement aired on
the Arabic satellite station Al Jazeira.

Speaker 16 (08:14):
Oh.

Speaker 7 (08:14):
It was on this day two thousand and three California
Governor Gray Davis had been recalled. He had to step down.
He was replaced by the Governator Arnold Schwarzeneger.

Speaker 17 (08:28):
I came, he have it absolutely nothing in California has
given me absolutely everything.

Speaker 7 (08:34):
Now in the wake of Hurricane Matthew on this date
nine years ago today, the death toll rose to eight hundred.
Two years ago today, Hamas led militants launched air and
ground attacks on Israel, killing nearly twelve hundred taking more
than two hundred and fifty hostages in the seven October attacks.

(08:55):
Those attacks, followed hours later by Israeli counterattacks, mark the
beginning of the current Hama Israel Hamas War.

Speaker 18 (09:04):
This morning Hamas launched a murderous surprise attack against the
State of Israel and its citizens. We've been at it
since early morning. I con been the aids of the
security service. First of all, I instructed to cleanse the
settlements of the terrorists who had infiltrated.

Speaker 7 (09:19):
Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahoo, speaking through an interpreter, among
those passing away on this date in history, Edgar Allan Poe,
who still gives us chills today, the man whom we
give thanks to every summer, Willis Carrier, the imbedd of

(09:40):
air conditioning well modern air Conditioning Tenor actor Mario Lanza,
baseball player and manager Leo du Rocher, Carol and Brady
from Days of Our Lives, Peggy McKay passing on this
date and a year ago today we lost the mom
who was a good singer, had some even better kids singing.

(10:01):
Sissy Houston passing away a year ago today. Birthdays on
this date include Andy Devine.

Speaker 16 (10:11):
On Hey, look to thringle, Hi a black how's your phone?

Speaker 6 (10:16):
Oh?

Speaker 19 (10:17):
Jes fine ringo?

Speaker 16 (10:18):
Except my grandfather came out.

Speaker 20 (10:20):
And they expect to see You're riding shotgun on this run.

Speaker 7 (10:23):
With John Wayne from That Wonderful Picture Stage coach Andy
Devine born on this date in history, Vice President Henry Wallace,
who also after being president from for Franklin Delano Roosevelt,
decided to run a third party camp and that didn't
go very well. Muslim leader Elijah Mohammad, singer Von Munroe,

(10:46):
actress June Allison, and singer Al Martino all born on
this date, and they have shuffled up this mortal coil.

Speaker 21 (10:55):
Hi, this is Jeff Foxworthy. It is now time for
the birthday announcements. The following people are now officially older
than dirt.

Speaker 7 (11:03):
She actually could be funny at times, but you know,
she's gotten so political it's hard to enjoy her anymore.
Joy Behart eighty three.

Speaker 22 (11:12):
Women cannot find a guy.

Speaker 4 (11:14):
It's very hard, especially after the age of forty.

Speaker 6 (11:16):
It's like getting kidnapped by.

Speaker 23 (11:18):
Terrorists, they say.

Speaker 7 (11:20):
Joy Behart eighty three.

Speaker 24 (11:21):
Today.

Speaker 7 (11:23):
A Lieutenant Colonel Oliver North of the United States Marines
eighty two years old today. John Cougar Mellencamp seventy four.
Vladimir Putin is seventy three. French born cellist Yo Yo
Ma seventy years old today. Contemporary Christian singer Michael W.

(11:43):
Smith is sixty eight. Simon Cowell, believe it or not,
is sixty six.

Speaker 25 (11:48):
This has been one of the worst days we've ever had,
and you are probably the worst we've had today.

Speaker 7 (11:55):
Yeah, Simon call has a problem. Nothing's perfect enough for him.
Sixty six years old today. Simon Cowell, A couple of
pro wrestlers of note Malaya, Hosaka, a Wonderful Ladies wrestler,
fifty six years old today. She's mostly retired. Also mostly

(12:15):
retired is Terry Garon, better known as Rhino. He is
fifty years old today. Actress Rachel McAdams for Mean Girls
in the Notebook is forty seven, and Lewis Capaldi, the
singer songwriter twenty nine. Those it's a few other people
celebrating the seventh day of October is their birthday. If

(12:36):
this is your birthday.

Speaker 24 (12:41):
We baked you our birthday.

Speaker 26 (12:43):
Kay.

Speaker 19 (12:44):
If you get it on may a and you moan
and grown and low.

Speaker 24 (12:49):
Don't forget we told you so.

Speaker 27 (12:54):
Mcawishneer and blow out the candles.

Speaker 7 (12:57):
Here they go, Well, okay, that's the stooges. And up
next Fred Allen eighty years ago, October seventh, nineteen forty five,
with some special auditions with his guest Charlie McCarthy. That's

(13:19):
up next.

Speaker 28 (13:26):
Daily the broadcasts of Radio Free Europe and Radio Free
Asia strike through the Iron Curtain, bringing the truth about
the free world, the captive people's behind it. Help send
a message by giving to the nineteen fifty two Crusade
for freedom.

Speaker 7 (13:42):
And we'll start off at eight thirty Eastern Time on Sunday,
October seventh, nineteen forty five, eighty years ago, for an
episode of The Fred Allen Show with his guests Edgar
and Charlie.

Speaker 6 (14:03):
Mister it isn't Gabriel Heater Kiddies. The Fred Allen Show
with Brett's Kass, Edgar Bergan and Tolly McCaffey, hoors On, Hapa,

(14:24):
Minerva pias Is, Missus muss Bohm, the DeMarco sisters, and
Al Goodman and his orchestra, And if anybody cares who
I am, my name is Kenny Delmar, Ladies and gentlemen.

(14:46):
Since the war ended, we've all been waiting for the
return of the things we've missed. Tonight we bring you
one of the things nobody's missed. And here he is
Bred Allen.

Speaker 29 (15:02):
Thank you, and good evening, ladies and gentlemen. Well, Kenny,
I've been away from radio quite a long time. I
guess everything has changed. No, Fred, things in radio are
about the same, Oh really about the same. Have they
found out who the mystery chef is yet?

Speaker 30 (15:16):
No?

Speaker 29 (15:17):
How about one man's family? Have there been any additions?

Speaker 6 (15:21):
Because no, Fred? What about Porsche? Has she turned around yet?

Speaker 30 (15:27):
No?

Speaker 6 (15:27):
Porscher is still facing right in. Say tell me Kenny.
Is that old gentleman still on the air every week?
You know, the old fellow with Oh you mean just
plain Bill?

Speaker 16 (15:40):
No?

Speaker 6 (15:41):
Bill, wasn't his name Pap Perkins?

Speaker 29 (15:44):
No, not Pop Perkins, singing sam No, not singing Samuel Warm.

Speaker 31 (15:49):
No.

Speaker 29 (15:49):
This old guy, this old guy had a ballot named Manchester,
a port Chester.

Speaker 6 (15:56):
I've been away so long? Oh you mean Jack Penny's
Jack Benny the octogenarian, and how he can play it?

Speaker 27 (16:05):
He's the guy?

Speaker 16 (16:08):
Is he?

Speaker 6 (16:09):
Is he still on the Yes, It's remarkable what those
one a day vitamins can do with a guy. He
his age? Well, is Jack old? Is he old?

Speaker 29 (16:20):
A friend of mine saw mister Benny in swimming this summer.
He thought that Benny was wearing a blue corduroy suit.
And it wasn't the blue corduroy suit. Benny is so
old now his veins are outside of his skin. His

(16:40):
face has more wrinkles than a seersucker suit. On the
closing day of a revival, almost didn't get that out.

Speaker 6 (16:50):
Is he really? Gosh Portland?

Speaker 32 (17:00):
How did you?

Speaker 6 (17:01):
I heard you singing as the program opened, awfully good?
How did you or how did you? Since I was
back on the air again, Mama.

Speaker 27 (17:08):
Heard a rumor you know how FA bad news travels?

Speaker 6 (17:11):
Oh yeah, watch uh what's new Portland?

Speaker 27 (17:17):
I thought you might need some new jokes for your program.

Speaker 6 (17:20):
Well, don't tell me that you have contrived some specimens
of wagger eight.

Speaker 33 (17:24):
Did you hear about the soldier who ate five dozen
oysters and got discharged.

Speaker 34 (17:29):
From the army?

Speaker 6 (17:30):
Ate five dozen oysters and got discharged from the army?

Speaker 27 (17:33):
Yes, he had sixty glue points.

Speaker 29 (17:39):
Oh fine, it wouldn't work with their clams, would it.
But jo, you know that joke sounds like something off
the bottom of Can you top this?

Speaker 27 (17:53):
Since the atomic bomb so on Japan? The emperor doesn't
wear a crowd.

Speaker 29 (17:58):
No, what is the emperor ware? And Adam's hat and
Atham's hat? You should put dry ice on that joke
instantly for that it won't keep a minute. And speaking
of minutes, any minute, we'll be leaving now for Alan's aalish.

Speaker 27 (18:12):
What is your question tonight?

Speaker 29 (18:14):
Well, one of the greatest problems facing the country today,
of course, is housing. Here in New York City, thousands
of people are looking for places to live, and so
our question is how is the housing shortage affecting you?
Shall we go, as one B twenty nine said to
the other, let's take off, ah Porland. It sure is

(18:44):
good to be back down here in Alan's allis?

Speaker 27 (18:47):
I wonder if the same people still live here.

Speaker 29 (18:49):
Well, there's only one way to find out. I'll knock
at this first door again.

Speaker 6 (18:55):
Somebody, I say, somebody knocked? Yeah, who was it? Apart me?
Mister Nada Claghorn? Is the name Claghorn?

Speaker 16 (19:03):
That air?

Speaker 29 (19:03):
Senator Claghorn. I'm from the South, the deep South, from
way down south.

Speaker 6 (19:10):
Yeah, I'm so far down south that my family's treading
water in the Gulf stream day That is south? Isn't
there where I live? We call the people from Alabama yankees. Well,
I don't buddy in when the body is talking. Son,

(19:30):
trial listener, I see trial listening. You're bound to learn something. Well, look, Senator,
anything gets me down. It's two people trying to talk
at the same time. Well, I know I got the floor, Son,
don't try and hold full of bus.

Speaker 29 (19:44):
Now, look, Senator, what about the housing shortage down there
in Washington?

Speaker 6 (19:48):
I'll stop at a hotel. Oh, you actually have a room.
What room you mean for twenty dollars a day. They
give me a chair in the lobby and a sleeping pill.
What is the housing problem coming to senator? There's only
I say, there's only one solution, and that is close

(20:10):
up the OPA. Well, what will happen if we close
the OPA? There will be millions of ceilings left over. Yes,
you put four walls under them ceiling.

Speaker 29 (20:20):
You got houses so long time, so long that here,
you know, I think the Senator's got something.

Speaker 6 (20:33):
They got something there? Yeah, I wonder what a knock
at this next door? We'll bring.

Speaker 32 (20:42):
Wordy bob.

Speaker 6 (20:43):
Oh, your Titus Moody? Is my name, Titus Moody, Moody
be name Moody Beneata. Well tell me, mister Moody. Has
the housing shortage bothered you any? That's why I had
to leave the farm bub really? Yeah, the land was suppoor.

(21:05):
You'd have to use twenty sacks a fertilizer to raise
a tune on it. Gods, cows were sweet.

Speaker 35 (21:12):
They used to travel in pairs.

Speaker 6 (21:14):
The cows had to travel in pairs. Yeah, took two
cows to pull up a blade of grass. The land
was dry?

Speaker 16 (21:24):
Was it dry?

Speaker 6 (21:26):
I didn't see no water for twenty years, twenty years,
one day it rained. Yes, when the first drop of
water hit me, I fainted. Yes, they had to throw
two buckets of dust in my face to bring me
to gosh, how did you or how did you cope
with the housing problem? Titus? I ordered one of them

(21:50):
two room houses from Sears Roebuck, but it didn't help.

Speaker 29 (21:53):
You mean when Sears Roebuck delivered the two rooms Sears
rose Sears.

Speaker 6 (21:57):
Was living in the front room and Roebuck was living
in the well if ire.

Speaker 29 (22:08):
If farmers can't find houses, I guess traveling salesmen will
just have to keep on traveling.

Speaker 6 (22:14):
And that brings us to another door. No, oh, missus nusbaub.

Speaker 34 (22:27):
You were expecting. Maybe Emperor Shapiro Hito.

Speaker 29 (22:39):
Tell me, tell me, Missus Nusbaum, how do you? How
do you feel about the housing shortage?

Speaker 33 (22:48):
Thanks to the housing shortage today depends in nusbaum.

Speaker 34 (22:53):
Is enjoining kenubio, bliss and pure expression.

Speaker 6 (22:57):
Yes, well, what happened? What happened?

Speaker 33 (23:02):
Missus ann is flogging to mine house relatives, relatives, lood relatives,
relatives without.

Speaker 6 (23:08):
Blood say, you must have a full house and the.

Speaker 34 (23:15):
Couch is sleeping. Two rapp aparts cousins.

Speaker 33 (23:19):
And the dining room table is sleeping four rainstimes.

Speaker 6 (23:23):
All four of them on one table.

Speaker 34 (23:25):
They I have brothers if it's making only two?

Speaker 33 (23:28):
Oh, well, I see, And the bathtub is sleeping Ben
Schwartz an uncle and pop.

Speaker 34 (23:36):
Uncle. Ben is the little pinker's boy. He is floating
on the water.

Speaker 6 (23:44):
The pinker's boy is a good swimmer.

Speaker 34 (23:46):
A human stitches.

Speaker 29 (23:54):
Well, tell me, missus Norsbaum, with all your relatives jamming
the house, didn't your husband get mad?

Speaker 33 (23:59):
Mad?

Speaker 34 (24:00):
One morning? Pierre is putting on his beat. He is
taking his molly Pecan.

Speaker 6 (24:08):
Records, took his Peacan records, and he is stanping down.
Your husband left you but two weeks.

Speaker 34 (24:15):
I am a widow.

Speaker 6 (24:16):
What happened?

Speaker 34 (24:17):
One night? Is coming on the door. I'm knocking.

Speaker 6 (24:23):
Your husband mine?

Speaker 34 (24:24):
Pierre is bett Ah.

Speaker 6 (24:26):
It was true love. Pierre couldn't live without you. Loves love.

Speaker 34 (24:30):
Pierre couldn't find a room.

Speaker 6 (24:42):
Well, here we are near the end of the alley.
I wonder who lives here? Hello?

Speaker 26 (24:48):
Hello, we'll hit that they Hello?

Speaker 24 (24:51):
How they do not Holly?

Speaker 36 (24:52):
But John?

Speaker 37 (24:53):
Hello?

Speaker 6 (24:54):
Wait a minute? I wait, then a look, test a minute?
Who are you boys?

Speaker 16 (24:58):
Were again?

Speaker 6 (25:00):
We're songwriters, what songs have you written? Have your hiped?
We're looking for the guy that again the beginning to
see if you can go anying to stop it?

Speaker 24 (25:10):
No, have your hype.

Speaker 6 (25:11):
When my baby smiled at me, I wish you'd put
in her teeth.

Speaker 29 (25:16):
Please joy tonight it so happens. We're discussing the housing shortage.

Speaker 6 (25:22):
We just wrote a housing shortage song, a housing song.
How does it go in?

Speaker 16 (25:26):
It?

Speaker 23 (25:26):
Shim the situation serious?

Speaker 6 (25:30):
It may get waste much, Fred, We mean the housing shortage.

Speaker 16 (25:34):
And why we see.

Speaker 38 (25:37):
Ye side where side all around Broadway you can't find
a please a live no matter what you pay, call
that apartment round in everywhere you walk.

Speaker 24 (25:53):
If it gets any worse, we'll all be staying.

Speaker 6 (25:58):
On the sidewalk, y'all. Thanks you very much to be
gonna get.

Speaker 29 (26:08):
And now, ladies and gentlemen, meet the DeMarco Sisters, five
talented youngsters we're happy to welcome as a regular feature
on our program tonight.

Speaker 6 (26:15):
They sing for you, it's gotta be this or that girl.

Speaker 24 (26:24):
If you ain't wrong, you're right. If it ain't done,
it's like if you ain't you gotta be the start that.
If it ain't for and it's Frank.

Speaker 39 (26:37):
If you don't.

Speaker 24 (26:38):
Stand and you banker.

Speaker 39 (26:42):
If it ain't being in Frank, gotta be this or that?

Speaker 24 (26:47):
You can't it be infit ain't me. I know it's
not your brother. Can you see it's gotta be one
way or the other. Tell me what I must know.
If you don't like, I'll go. If it yeah, it's
no gotta.

Speaker 6 (27:07):
Be or that blue?

Speaker 32 (27:11):
Can it be with? Can't you be?

Speaker 6 (27:16):
Gotta be one way?

Speaker 40 (27:19):
Other?

Speaker 6 (27:21):
Tell them what Thomas know.

Speaker 24 (27:24):
If you don't like, I'll go. Don't let him not
let them gotta be the sort that.

Speaker 41 (27:32):
Yeah, if you don't like our god gotta be.

Speaker 16 (27:42):
That.

Speaker 29 (28:00):
Al Goodman and his orchestra have just played June is
busting out.

Speaker 6 (28:03):
A little bit. There wasn't time enough for June to
bust out all over? And now, uh, what's the trouble
Portland's you look bewildered?

Speaker 27 (28:13):
Well, I was just wondering how did you get back
into radio, mister Allen?

Speaker 6 (28:17):
How did I get back?

Speaker 27 (28:18):
You didn't work for a year.

Speaker 6 (28:20):
Didn't work. While last year I was the backbone of
Radio Portland incognito for two months. I filled in when
Bulldog Drummond had distemper I can thank only one person
for this job, Portland, Charlie McCarthy.

Speaker 42 (28:34):
Charlie McCarthy.

Speaker 6 (28:36):
I heard the orchestra playing Edgar steam song. On my
way out, I heard voices somebody arguing in one of
the dressing rooms.

Speaker 29 (28:55):
Well, I put my ear to the keyhole. It was
Edgar Bergen and Charlie mc coy.

Speaker 6 (29:00):
Edgar was saying, that's the last straw, Charlie, I'll keep
your shirt on there.

Speaker 43 (29:10):
Why Charlie, the idea of you leaving me to go
with Fred Allen, Why that's ridiculous.

Speaker 21 (29:15):
Yes, yeah, this is my reward.

Speaker 6 (29:18):
After I've given you the best years of my life,
I'll let your age. You should be glad to unload those.

Speaker 35 (29:23):
Years on anybody.

Speaker 1 (29:25):
What has Fred Allen got.

Speaker 43 (29:27):
That I haven't got nothing, But he stands a little
of it once in a while. Well, if you think
Alan pay's higher wages, you're sadly mistaken. His program went
off the air because Pelagra broke out among his cast.
Alan isn't hiring knee Burg, and I'm hiring Alan.

Speaker 44 (29:49):
If anybody's going to the underpaid, I will do the undertake.
So you're going to have your own show. You heard
me your ears.

Speaker 22 (29:57):
Don't laugh over no where?

Speaker 6 (30:00):
Why you little whipper snapper?

Speaker 22 (30:02):
You ah, your father's my staggerg.

Speaker 27 (30:12):
What happened then, mister Allie?

Speaker 29 (30:14):
Well I knew Charlie McCarthy was in the dressing room alone,
so I opened the door.

Speaker 6 (30:19):
Mister McCarthy, s mister McCarthy, it's.

Speaker 44 (30:23):
No use crawling back. Bergen.

Speaker 6 (30:25):
Oh it's you Fred Allis.

Speaker 29 (30:27):
Yeah, well you're just a man I want to see
say I heard the argument, mister McCarthy's what's on your mind?

Speaker 44 (30:33):
Well, you need a job.

Speaker 6 (30:34):
I need a partner.

Speaker 22 (30:36):
What are we waiting for?

Speaker 6 (30:37):
But mister McCarthy, Edgar's my friend French.

Speaker 44 (30:42):
Do you know what Burginston saying about you?

Speaker 45 (30:45):
No?

Speaker 44 (30:45):
Burg said you were so cheap that when you brought
a pint of blood to the Red Cross, you made
him give you a deposit on the bottle.

Speaker 6 (30:54):
I'm cheap. Why Bergen with that pot belly?

Speaker 29 (30:58):
He only raised that abdominal so he could keep his
pants up without having to buy suspenders.

Speaker 34 (31:05):
Oh, Allan, you.

Speaker 44 (31:05):
Look better than me every minute. Well I went through
that sheepskin.

Speaker 6 (31:12):
Bergen is tighter than the top olive in a bottle.
He is over penurius. I sometimes stay. I like the word.

Speaker 44 (31:21):
I don't know what it means about it.

Speaker 6 (31:24):
I can break it up. You might understand part of it.

Speaker 22 (31:29):
I like it better.

Speaker 6 (31:30):
Those ready to wear suits EE buy with two pair
of pants.

Speaker 44 (31:35):
Then he'd have a tailor and make me a suit.

Speaker 6 (31:37):
Oh your suits? What tailor made?

Speaker 16 (31:39):
Yeah?

Speaker 44 (31:39):
Out of the second pair of pants.

Speaker 29 (31:40):
Yes, you mean that suit you have on now was
once a pair of Bergen's pants.

Speaker 6 (31:46):
Well, look at the coat.

Speaker 44 (31:47):
The lapels have cuffs on them.

Speaker 6 (31:51):
Lapels with cuffs, Sarah.

Speaker 44 (31:53):
And all my coats have zippers down the back.

Speaker 6 (32:03):
But mister McCarthy, if we team up and you think
we can get any work.

Speaker 44 (32:07):
Stick with me Allan, and we'll go places in radio.

Speaker 6 (32:10):
Oh mister McCarthy, Oh come, come, stop licking my hand
with you, mister McCarthy. Will I get last?

Speaker 44 (32:24):
Will Charlie knows the sponsor and Charlie gets the last.

Speaker 29 (32:30):
But, mister McCarthy, all my life I've been a comedian.
I've gotten laughs.

Speaker 44 (32:34):
If Henry Kaiser can reconvert, so can you.

Speaker 6 (32:39):
Yes, sir, I promise not to get any laughs. When
I started with Bergen, he promised not to get any
laughs too. Oh really, yes, that's the only thomase he
ever kept.

Speaker 29 (32:51):
Well, now that that's all settled, is there is there
anything else? Charlie, Well, Charlie. Oh, I'm sorry, mister mccafey.
It was a slept honest, mister McCarthy, I just mean
I just lost my head there for a second.

Speaker 44 (33:08):
Quite all right, it's quite all right.

Speaker 6 (33:10):
I'm not a snob, you'll understand, right, but I am
the star of the program, yes, sir, Yes, And between.

Speaker 44 (33:17):
The star and the stooge, certain class distinctions.

Speaker 6 (33:21):
Must be observed. Yes, Master, I shall remember. I'll be
on your knee, It's true. But that's as far as
the intimacy will go.

Speaker 32 (33:32):
Mister.

Speaker 6 (33:34):
I understand, I'm the stooge and I shall keep my place, sir.
That's it's nothing personal, you know. But this is radio,
you see. It's dog eat dog, I know, sir.

Speaker 44 (33:45):
And I've just finished eating that Mexican hairless burgen.

Speaker 6 (33:51):
Sir. I give you a toast to the new Charlie
mccaffee show.

Speaker 44 (33:55):
Good McCarthey, march is on.

Speaker 6 (34:01):
Well Portland.

Speaker 29 (34:02):
Charlie and I rehearsed our act all the next morning,
at about two o'clock that afternoon.

Speaker 34 (34:07):
Okay, you'll write down your names? Where's what is pick?
And riches?

Speaker 24 (34:10):
Pat?

Speaker 6 (34:15):
This will cost you your job, young ladies, Miss goobert,
mis Goober, I'm a busy man. Yes, call a conference.
Get all my vice presidents here in my office immediately. Yes,
and when they get here, cancel a conference. How Hi,
I'm a busy man. Where's my partaple desk? It's supposed
to be wheel around in front of me. Hand me
a desk, somebody. I'm a busy man.

Speaker 44 (34:31):
Hello, missed your leave?

Speaker 6 (34:32):
Yeh, Miss Cooper? Who are these people?

Speaker 44 (34:35):
Mister leave?

Speaker 6 (34:35):
Don't you remind me who said that? Who's talking?

Speaker 30 (34:37):
It's me?

Speaker 46 (34:38):
I'm down here?

Speaker 44 (34:39):
Oh yeah about that radio job?

Speaker 30 (34:42):
You know?

Speaker 6 (34:42):
Sorry, mail Leaguandia. We're a pull up on news comic, mister.

Speaker 44 (34:49):
Leeve, you're reminded me, Charlie.

Speaker 6 (34:50):
McCarthy Cony, Oh yes, I mess you with Beg Bergan?

Speaker 44 (34:53):
Yeah, yes, Bergen?

Speaker 6 (34:54):
What a comedian. If you're with Bergen, it's a deal,
Miss Coober, give this boy a contract.

Speaker 44 (34:57):
I'm a busy man, mister Lee, I guess I'm not
exactly working with Bergen on this show.

Speaker 6 (35:02):
No Burger, no contact. Pull these trampsous, But we've got
a We've got a great act, Sir, mister Les, give
us a chance.

Speaker 32 (35:08):
On my way.

Speaker 6 (35:08):
I'm a busy man. This's Goobra. I'm on my way someplace.
Where am I going to listen to.

Speaker 34 (35:14):
Listen to auditions for your radio program?

Speaker 5 (35:16):
Oh?

Speaker 6 (35:16):
Yes, yes, I love to audition access. Hand me my gun?

Speaker 16 (35:18):
Yes?

Speaker 6 (35:22):
Where the way? Clear the way? Stand back, everybody. I'm
a busy man. Where's the door? Oh here, I'm off.
Gad he is a busy man on that closet. Where's
the door?

Speaker 16 (35:33):
Oh here, I'm off.

Speaker 6 (35:36):
Come on, Allen, we'll do an audition too. Huh Gray,
here's the audition room.

Speaker 34 (35:41):
Quiet, that's the lafer stopping the audition.

Speaker 16 (35:44):
All right, all right, let's go.

Speaker 6 (35:45):
I'm a busy man. Start singing you kiss me king,
kiss me.

Speaker 16 (35:54):
Goose.

Speaker 34 (35:54):
Next the three post access to get going, Gyles.

Speaker 6 (35:59):
Yeah, we're down the line on the actent bigger infane fast. Next?

Speaker 34 (36:10):
Are you guys next?

Speaker 6 (36:12):
Are you ready? Mister McCarthy Alan, you know I've been.

Speaker 44 (36:15):
Thinking supposedly change the activist. You sit on im in
front of me.

Speaker 6 (36:18):
Huh no, you're the star, mister McCarthy. You sit in
front the way. We rehearsed it. Next, who's holding up
the audition. I'm a busy man.

Speaker 44 (36:27):
Is your voice Rady Allen? Okay, remember to keep leaving
so he can't draw a steady bead.

Speaker 6 (36:39):
Let's go, mister McCarty. Where Allan and McCarty with the
life of every body. We'll cheer you folks, live clips
and jokes it sure, we'll make your laugh And if
you want a song with us, you can go wrong.

Speaker 32 (36:57):
By the low.

Speaker 6 (37:01):
All the silvery move. We'll see also where the life
of every party?

Speaker 33 (37:12):
Where Allan and mccaunty, save friend, my girl can't wear
liquid stockings?

Speaker 6 (37:20):
Well, why can't your girl wear liquid stockings, mister McCarthy,
because she.

Speaker 44 (37:24):
Can't get her leg in a bottle?

Speaker 6 (37:28):
Where Allan and Marcotty? Where the life of everybody up?
Where God got tread the gun?

Speaker 22 (37:33):
Mister jams.

Speaker 6 (37:39):
Hey, aren't you Fred Allen? Yes, sir, I need a
man like you to take over my program. I'll call
it the Fred Allen Shone. Maybe your own price. I'm
a busy man, is it a Allen?

Speaker 16 (37:46):
Well?

Speaker 44 (37:47):
What about me here?

Speaker 6 (37:47):
Mister? Yes? What about my partner? Little guy is out
he has no talent. I'm a busy man. Goodbye at last,
Back on the air. Yeah, the Fred Allen Show. Gosh,
i'd better phone Portland and Al Goodman and call up
the other. Yeah, we really put it over, didn't we?
Partner partner? You heard what mister Leaf said, scram small
fry and I look Fred now Fred, I'm sorry, mister Allen.

(38:15):
I've decided maybe we should start a co star on
the show. Co star on the Fred Allen Show. You
know radio it's dog eat dog. Yeah, but mister Allen,
beat it before I throw a termite on you.

Speaker 44 (38:28):
But kind sir, sir, I'm not going to leave you here.

Speaker 6 (38:32):
Oh I'm not going to leave you here. Here's your
confere home. A nickel so long?

Speaker 44 (38:37):
Yes, what did I step into this time?

Speaker 26 (38:42):
A nickel?

Speaker 44 (38:44):
There's only one thing I could do with a nickel.
Oh well, let's go the carthy.

Speaker 38 (38:57):
Hello, mister.

Speaker 25 (39:01):
Guess who is?

Speaker 44 (39:05):
Now? Wait a minute, logan, but you gotta take me
back now please?

Speaker 1 (39:10):
Yeah?

Speaker 6 (39:11):
Well, I worked for fifty century twenty five, I work
for nothing. I'll be I'll pay you, I'll be your slave.
Urgan listen if you'll only take me back this one.

Speaker 7 (39:42):
And the reason there are no tender Leaf tea commercials
in there is that was an Armed Forces recording and
the editing in nineteen forty five wasn't that good because
they still weren't using tape. You see that the Fred
Allen Show as it was broadcast on October seventh, nineteen
forty five, eighty years ago today, and that was broadcast

(40:05):
at eight thirty. If my memory serves it does eight thirty,
eight thirty on NBC, which at that time had Gildersleeve
at six thirty, Jack Benny at seven, the Fitch Bandwagon
with Cass Daily at seven thirty, Charlie McCarthy at eight,
and then Fred Allen at eight thirty. So they had

(40:26):
a busy, busy night there with The Manhattan Merry Go
Round at nine, the American Album of Popular Music at
nine thirty, the Hour of Charm at ten, and then
that was followed by Meet Me at Parkies with the
slapstick comedy of park Your Carcass coming up in just
a moment. We'll take a look at the news and
then we'll roll over to CBS at six o'clock and

(40:48):
see what was going on in the whole household of
Ozzie and Harriet.

Speaker 47 (40:59):
We live than an age of specialization.

Speaker 6 (41:01):
We work in it too.

Speaker 47 (41:03):
The legendary jack of all trades is lost out to
the master of one to often. However, twentieth century employers
find it difficult to find the highly trained, highly skilled
workers they need. Like any problem, however, theirs will yield
to thought and consideration. A physically handicapped worker, for example,
may not be able to do every job well, but

(41:23):
if he's trained to do the one job you want done,
you can rest assured he'll do that job well. A
physical disability is not, and need not be, a job disability.
Very often, a handicap will even add to the worker's efficiency.
Where excessive room noise is a factor, a deaf employee
may prove more efficient than his colleagues. Weekdays, call the

(41:43):
local office of your State Employment Service and hire the
handicap to fill job openings in your organization. You will
find the State Employment Service listed in your telephone directory.

Speaker 7 (41:55):
All right, we heard the Fred Allen show. We're going
to hear oz' see and Harriet next. But we're going
back seven eighty years to Sunday, October seventh, nineteen forty five.
And as we do when we get a couple of
shows from the same date, let's take a look at
the news items from that date.

Speaker 16 (42:13):
John L.

Speaker 7 (42:13):
Lewis turned down a request of bituminous coal operators to
end the soft coal strike. A government didn't press the issue.
Operators made their plea at a conference with secondary of
Labor Lewis B. Schwellenbach, who told reporters he did not
himself ask the u Mighted Wine Workers president to end
the strike about one hundred and fifty nine thousand idol

(42:34):
in more than six hundred minds in the controversy which
sprang up over recognition of Lewis's supervisory union, the US
has decided to abolish Shintoism as a state religion in Japan.
The measure, one of the most drastic yet determined in
remaking Japan into a peaceful nation, will not affect Shintoism

(42:56):
insofar as it is a religion of individual jap However,
the cult is to lose its government support, its special taxes,
its place in the School of Japan, and its official
enforcement of the people aged Baron Kijo shaire Dada, the
long time full of Japan's machine gun imperialism, became premier

(43:19):
of a new government yesterday and forthwith disbanded the dreaded
Secret Police Given a free hand by Emperor Hirohito and
the approval of General MacArthur's headquarters, the seventy three year
old former ambassador to the US dug into his task
with a big vigor that belied his seventy three years.
The Domai Agency said his first act was to reappoint

(43:41):
as Foreign Minister Shigero Yoshida, a like minded man whose
criticisms of the war against the US once landed him
in jail. In Buenos Aari's mounted police, trying to halt
the wave of demonstrations against the government yesterday, charged into
a crowd and broke up a funeral possess a procession
or a young chemical student killed by gunfire during a

(44:05):
Thursday street disturbance. A crowd of four hundred gathered in
president the ded youth's home. He scattered. The crowd scattered
as the police charged it. Another crowd of ten thousand
that the cemetery also dispersed my mounted police. Secretary of
State burns hoping for the early Russian acceptance of his

(44:26):
compromised plan providing a European peace, But diplomats are by
no means competent. They'll get it instead. Troubled US relations
with Russia are regarded as right for more weeks of bickering.
Britain expected to get in on the row when Foreign
Secretary Bevan addresses the House of Commons on Tuesday. John

(44:46):
Foster Dulles, the advisor to Secretary of State Burns, said
last night the Soviet delegation to the recent Council of
Foreign Ministers in London, quoting wanted to find out how
much of our principle the US was willing to sacrifice
to attain our goals. Dola said they did find out.
They found out that the US was not willing to
sacrifice its principles or its historic relationship and friendship with

(45:11):
China and France. It was inevitable that a time should
come when the Soviet Union would want to test this out.
It's a good thing that that has happened and that
it's now behind us. Also, President Truman reached Carruthersville, Missouri,
last night after a flight from Washington to make his
twelfth annual visit to the American Legion Fair. There, riding

(45:34):
on the backseat of an open car, the smiling President
rode down ward avenue of four thousands of spectators after
landing blythe Bill, Arkansas, twenty nine miles distant. An hour
and a half earlier. Airplane makers lifted part of the
lid off the Future of Flying yesterday and displayed one

(45:55):
plane almost as big as a submarine and others with
the aid of jet probols and could get in the
air and as little as seven seconds. The display stage
for a group of newsmen who traveled across the continent
in a survey of reconversion problems and yesterday looked into
an industry that has one of the largest of all
headache departments. One of the new products a giant airplane

(46:17):
known as the XC ninety nine, which was shown publicly
at Consolidated Multi Aircraft Corporation for the first time yesterday.
Military censorship of Allied correspondence news dispatches from Japan and
Korea ended yesterday with the Reservations with reservations at the
order of General MacArthur, acting under War Department authorization to

(46:40):
us his own discretion in the matter, the Allied Supreme
Commander stopped the blue penciling of the newsmen's copy except
for certain military information still considered secret. The judicial proceedings
against any of Japan's accused war criminals scheduled to open
in Manila at two o'clock this afternoon. General Tomyuki Tomoyuki,

(47:06):
Yamashita Vick Glipped and Bullneck Tiger Bluzon due to appear
before a military court comprised of five American generals to
answer charges that he permitted his troops to commit brutal atrocities.
General Douglas MacArthur, Supreme Allied Commander, announced the Japanese scientists
had perfected a death ray which killed rabbits at about

(47:29):
forty yards but left humans only dizzied and fatigued for
twelve to twenty four hours, and during the four hour
service interruption on Dalus telephones yesterday up in Newark, New Jersey,
Gilbert Hunsinger managed to get word to his wife at Bloomfield,
New Jersey he would be late for dinner. He sent

(47:50):
the message by carrier pigeon. Hunsinger, a homing pigeon enthusiast,
took the bird with him yesterday morning just in case.
Though some of the day's top news stories is reported
in the newspapers of Sunday, October seventh, nineteen forty five,
on your radio. Up next, The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet.

Speaker 2 (48:16):
If your daily routine never varies, chances are your heading
for a great, big case of monotony. Everybody needs a
break once in a while, and sometimes a vacation just
once or twice a year isn't it enough? But a
break once a week would more than fill the bill.
What could you do with that leisure time? Here's the
answer to that. You can vary your routine with a
fascinating and vital pursuit spotting planes for America's Ground Observer

(48:39):
cor It's exciting, it's interesting, and just two hours a
week of your spare time is all that's needed to
keep up the twenty four hour schedule of the GOC.
Men and women from teenage up can help the Air
Corps cover the blind spots in our radar system by
volunteering for the Ground Observer Corps, a civilian component of
the Air Defense Command, be trained and supervised by officers

(49:01):
and airmen of the Air Defense Command to spot planes
in your area. Find out from your local Civilian Defense
office how you can be a civilian ground observer.

Speaker 7 (49:11):
Now we're gonna hear a show which I believe is
the start of the second season of the Adventures of
Ozzie and Harriet. At this time, the roles of David
and Ricky were still being played by actors. They wouldn't
be in until I believe it's nineteen forty nine when
they moved to ABC, because the boys were still too young.

(49:31):
But they know, I guess, I take it back to
I guess they had been on some of the NBC
shows in nineteen four. Well't no, they might have been
back on in I'm looking at the dates here, I'm
trying to figure it all out, but yeah, they didn't.
The first five years of the show, the boys weren't

(49:54):
playing themselves, are being played by actors. But this is
the start of the second season of the Adventures of
Ozzy and Harriet, which was launched off of The Red
Skeleton Show. They took over the Red Skeleton Show while
even though they were basically the musical components of the show.
Although Harriet did some acting in the show, occasionally she

(50:17):
would portray Junior's mom and some other roles. But the
interesting part on that is they ended up well, Red
went to the service, Well, they ended up doing their
own thing, and they created their own show so that

(50:37):
they could keep working it was on CBS on Sunday nights.
It was six o'clock Eastern time, Ozzy and Harriet six
point thirty, Baby Snook seven o'clock, The Thin Man seven
point thirty, Blindey, the Mulas show at eight o'clock, and

(50:59):
I believe at that point, wait, it was not Marlon
Hurt the Crime Doctor at eight thirty and then requests
performance at nine Star Theater at nine thirty. Take it
or leave it at ten and weave the people at
ten thirty. As you can see, it was not at
all the same bunch that you had earlier on or

(51:22):
as you would have later on on CBS once Jack
Benny and the Talent Raids took hold. So let's get
to this episode of Ozzie and Harriet starring Ozzie Nelson
and Harriet Hilliard, although they were married, and this is
from eighty years ago, Sunday, October seventh, nineteen forty five.

Speaker 6 (51:42):
Gosha.

Speaker 22 (51:42):
Also see how about that right here in the morning's paper, Harriet.

Speaker 1 (51:48):
Ozzie, I can't understand the word you say. You're not talking,
You're just mumbling.

Speaker 22 (51:52):
Oh, I'm sorry. How's this? The solid silver with beauty
that lives forever is International Sterling.

Speaker 1 (51:58):
Now you're talking.

Speaker 22 (52:08):
The solid silver with beauty that lives forever.

Speaker 48 (52:11):
Is International Sterling from Hollywood International Silver Company, creators of
International Sterling, present The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet, starring
America's favorite young couple.

Speaker 22 (52:22):
Ozzie Nelson and Harriet Hillard.

Speaker 48 (52:39):
Well, it's a beautiful fall morning, both outside and inside
the Nelson home in eighteen forty seven Rogers Road. David
and Ricky are outside playing, but Ozzy and Harriet are
at the breakfast table looking over the morning mail.

Speaker 1 (52:51):
Well, look, so there's a lot of mail for me, Yes, honey,
it just looks that way. Most of it's for David.

Speaker 22 (52:57):
I'd like to know why David gets more male than
I do.

Speaker 1 (53:00):
Well, there he sends in more boxtops than you do.

Speaker 22 (53:06):
Incidentally, whatever happens to the stuff that's in the boxes
the box tops come from? Are we piling it up
in a little room somewhere or what?

Speaker 1 (53:12):
I don't know, and I'm afraid to ask.

Speaker 49 (53:14):
Let's see what they're in the mail here. David Nelson,
David Nelson, David Nelson, David Nelson's David Nelson, Alonzo gor
Can cut it. Hey, a lot of dead guys live
in there? Is there somebody living with us we don't
know about?

Speaker 50 (53:32):
Let's see.

Speaker 1 (53:33):
Oh, I guess the postman made a mistake. It's not
even our address.

Speaker 22 (53:36):
Hey, look, there must be something wrong here. Here's a
letter for us.

Speaker 1 (53:39):
That's odd looking handwriting, isn't it.

Speaker 22 (53:41):
Well, we know some odd looking people.

Speaker 50 (53:44):
Oh, mom, Pop, is there a letter here for me
from Charles Atlas?

Speaker 16 (53:47):
Yeah?

Speaker 22 (53:47):
There probably is. You got an old mess of him here?

Speaker 51 (53:53):
Gosh, look at the one you got?

Speaker 50 (53:55):
Hey, Pop? Can I have the stamp off that envelope?

Speaker 6 (53:58):
Okay?

Speaker 22 (53:58):
Just wayle? I finished reading it? Hey, well, I'll be darned, Harriet.
You'll never guess who this letter is from.

Speaker 50 (54:04):
Really who?

Speaker 22 (54:05):
Let me see how good you are? See if you
can guess, I'll give you a few hints. Okay, it's
from a certain man we saw only once, a man
who went far away, and you never thought you'd hear
from him again.

Speaker 1 (54:15):
The waiter at the restaurant last night.

Speaker 22 (54:19):
Yah, now you think I'm kidding. I'll think back a
couple of months. Do you remember meeting a certain Arabian officer,
Ali Magaga. He came to San Francisco to the peace conference.
He visited Los Angeles one weekend.

Speaker 1 (54:30):
Oh sure, I remember now that nice foreign fellow we
met at the Palladium. What's the name of that little
country he's from.

Speaker 22 (54:36):
Uh, Bazarkistan, that's right?

Speaker 1 (54:41):
Say where is Bizarkistan? Again?

Speaker 16 (54:43):
Why?

Speaker 22 (54:43):
It's about as a matter of fact, you go right
through it to get to before I tell you. Let's
see how good David is at geography? David, where is Bizarkistan?

Speaker 50 (54:55):
Gosh? I don't know, pop, Son.

Speaker 22 (54:56):
That just goes to show you should study your geography.
What if when you're grown up your son asks you,
where's Bazarkistan?

Speaker 44 (55:03):
What do you say?

Speaker 50 (55:04):
I'll say, Son, that just goes to show you you
should study your.

Speaker 1 (55:07):
Okay, okay, never mind it anyway? Was he saying the
letter let.

Speaker 22 (55:12):
Me see, uh, honored friends, It is I Ali Magaga
who writes to thank you again for your kindness to me.

Speaker 1 (55:20):
Isn't it nice?

Speaker 22 (55:21):
In appreciation of your friendship, which you'll bestowed on a
strange when you're city, I am sending you in separate
package a token of my extremely gratitude, thanking you again
for your kindly hospital. Prince Salim, Hey, I didn't know
he was a prince. Gosh, ps. If you're ever in Bizarkistan,
look me up. I'm in the book.

Speaker 34 (55:47):
Hey how about that?

Speaker 1 (55:48):
Isn't it exciting a gift from an Arabian prince? What
do you suppose it'll be?

Speaker 16 (55:53):
Will?

Speaker 22 (55:53):
I don't want to build your hopes up. But didn't
Ali Magaga tell us they had a lot of precious
stones and metals in his country.

Speaker 1 (56:00):
Remember he was wearing a big green emerald the size
of a traffic light.

Speaker 22 (56:04):
Please don't exaggerate, dear, I remembered very well, and it
wasn't any bigger than a walnut.

Speaker 1 (56:09):
Maybe sending me a string of pearls, wouldn't that be wonderful?

Speaker 22 (56:13):
Well, I'm a little insulted, after all, I gave your
string of pearls once, and I worked pretty hard to
get them too.

Speaker 1 (56:19):
That's right, you did took your three nickels to make
that iron claw drop in the right place.

Speaker 22 (56:28):
Anyway, I'll bet.

Speaker 6 (56:29):
The gift is for me.

Speaker 1 (56:30):
You know, you may be right? After all, Arabia is
the place where they have those harons with beautiful dancing
girls that do the dance of the Seven Veils.

Speaker 22 (56:37):
Oh, he wouldn't Why not? You mean you really think
we sure?

Speaker 1 (56:43):
Maybe he sent you the seven veils.

Speaker 22 (56:47):
Fine, that's like getting a Tutsi roll without the TUTSI.

Speaker 40 (56:53):
Say.

Speaker 22 (56:53):
You know, it would be funny if he did send
me one of those dancing girls.

Speaker 1 (56:56):
Oh, I see, what would you do with an Arabian
dancing girl?

Speaker 22 (57:00):
Don't be silly, I like to dance.

Speaker 1 (57:05):
Well, I still think it'll be a precious jewel of
some sort. You know, those Arabian princes are fabulously wealthy.
It could be a ruby.

Speaker 22 (57:12):
She a ruby? What a ruby's worth?

Speaker 1 (57:15):
Many? Price might be five hundred dollars, might be thousands
of dollars.

Speaker 22 (57:19):
Gosh, imagine us with a ruby worth thousands of dollars.

Speaker 50 (57:23):
He may send us a magic carpet.

Speaker 22 (57:25):
David, don't let your imagination run.

Speaker 16 (57:27):
Away with it.

Speaker 1 (57:29):
David, isn't the time you started for school?

Speaker 50 (57:31):
Or what do I have to go to school for?
If we're gonna be.

Speaker 1 (57:33):
Rich, don't hurry up, Davy, you'll be late, Okay, goodbye, byne.

Speaker 22 (57:39):
He's a good little fellow. I wonder where he gets
that vivid imagination from.

Speaker 50 (57:44):
You threw the.

Speaker 22 (57:44):
Breakfast, dear, Yes I am.

Speaker 1 (57:45):
I'll call Gloria, Gloria.

Speaker 5 (57:48):
Oh, Gloria, and you call me miss Neil said, yes,
I did, Laria, We're all through bread.

Speaker 22 (58:00):
What do you think, Gloria, we got a letter from
Bazarkistan today.

Speaker 36 (58:04):
Well, well imagine that. When is he getting out of
the army?

Speaker 22 (58:15):
Oh no, Gloria, Bazakistan is a country. We just received
a letter from a friend of ours telling us to
be on the lookout for a gift from there.

Speaker 36 (58:22):
Oh, I see, And where is bizarre you're standing located?

Speaker 1 (58:27):
Well, it's a little country somewhere on the Arabian Peninsula,
I believe you.

Speaker 50 (58:32):
See.

Speaker 36 (58:32):
When I went to school, I was very bad and arithmetic.

Speaker 22 (58:38):
Arithmetic, glory. You study about Arabia and geography, I know.

Speaker 52 (58:42):
But if you can't and you can't tell time, and
if you can't tell time, are you ever going to
get to your geography clans? Gloria.

Speaker 1 (58:53):
Look, Arabia is a country far away from America, and
life's very different there, and it's a place of strange
romance and adventure where men come galloping out of the night,
sweep you into their arms and carry you off into
the hills.

Speaker 36 (59:10):
Did you ever walk down Hollywood Boulevard?

Speaker 22 (59:21):
Well, anyway, Gloria, the important thing is that we're expecting
a gift, so we be on the lookout for it
in case we're not at home.

Speaker 52 (59:27):
Oh sure, mister Nelson. You know I'm expecting a gift
too for my boyfriend Almer. I think he's going to
give me an electric iron.

Speaker 1 (59:35):
An electric iron.

Speaker 52 (59:37):
Well, I'm not sure, but I think so. Last time
I saw him, we had an argument and he said
he was going to give it to me hot and heavy.
What kind of a present are you expecting, Missus Nelson.

Speaker 1 (59:56):
Well, we don't know, Gloria, but we think it might
be a ruby.

Speaker 52 (01:00:00):
That's nice. I've been expecting a ruby for two years now.

Speaker 1 (01:00:05):
Who from?

Speaker 50 (01:00:05):
Who cares?

Speaker 30 (01:00:08):
You know?

Speaker 36 (01:00:09):
You never can tell where you'll get things from.

Speaker 52 (01:00:11):
A fortune teller once told me i'd get something valuable
from somewhere.

Speaker 36 (01:00:16):
I at least expected it, and did you.

Speaker 52 (01:00:19):
The very next day, I was eating oysters in a restaurant,
and what happened? I got tormaine poisoning and collected two
hundred dollars.

Speaker 36 (01:00:31):
I'll get it.

Speaker 16 (01:00:33):
At delivery.

Speaker 35 (01:00:34):
Half I missed them, missus Ozzie Nelson.

Speaker 36 (01:00:36):
Oh is this the one that came all the way
from Arabia?

Speaker 35 (01:00:39):
Yeah, that's right.

Speaker 36 (01:00:40):
Oh, you poor man, you must be tired.

Speaker 37 (01:00:47):
Abby.

Speaker 1 (01:00:47):
Did you hear that the package from Arabia?

Speaker 6 (01:00:50):
Oh wonderful?

Speaker 22 (01:00:51):
Want me to sign up?

Speaker 16 (01:00:52):
Mister?

Speaker 35 (01:00:52):
Ah, yes, please sign right there.

Speaker 1 (01:00:54):
Well, where's the package? Aren't you going to bring it in?

Speaker 16 (01:00:57):
Well?

Speaker 35 (01:00:57):
I could bring it in, lady, but I think you
better go out.

Speaker 22 (01:01:00):
Let's go see what it is. Harriet, Harriet, where are you?

Speaker 1 (01:01:02):
I'm right with you.

Speaker 36 (01:01:03):
I'm coming to.

Speaker 35 (01:01:05):
Well there you are, folks.

Speaker 36 (01:01:07):
There it is, Oh my goodness, oh my goodness of all.

Speaker 22 (01:01:14):
Things, to send us a camel.

Speaker 35 (01:01:18):
Yes, that, folks, that's what it is, all right, A
real live camel.

Speaker 27 (01:01:21):
Is that what that is?

Speaker 36 (01:01:23):
I thought it was a horse with the mumps.

Speaker 1 (01:01:28):
I can't believe my eyes.

Speaker 22 (01:01:30):
I can't believe my eyes, but I can believe my nose.

Speaker 1 (01:01:48):
Ozzie, something's got to be done about that camel we
got yesterday. We'll just have to get rid of it.

Speaker 22 (01:01:53):
Yeah, I guess you're right. Of course, David won't like
the idea.

Speaker 1 (01:01:56):
Well, I know, dear, But what can we do with
that camel in the ard? It's like living next door
to a glue factory. Every time the wind changes, a
different neighbor complains.

Speaker 22 (01:02:06):
Yeah, I must admit he's a little on the gamey side,
sort of like the Hackensack River at Low Tide. I
never realized that camel's had such a peculiar fragrance.

Speaker 1 (01:02:18):
Peculiar fragrance, he's practically a secret weapon.

Speaker 16 (01:02:22):
Now.

Speaker 22 (01:02:23):
David was figuring on riding him to school tomorrow too.

Speaker 1 (01:02:25):
Oh, Ozzie, that's too dangerous, little boy riding a camel
down the street.

Speaker 22 (01:02:29):
Oh, I don't know. Camels are tall. How high can
a woman driver hit?

Speaker 1 (01:02:35):
Well, David'll just have to be disappointed then, because that
camel's too strong for me to endure. I find myself
hoping I'll get a head cold.

Speaker 22 (01:02:43):
Oh, I agree with you. We got to get rid
of them. You know something, though, I think Gloria is
going to be sorry to see him go too. What
makes you say that, Well, yesterday Gloria spent over two
hours with the camel.

Speaker 1 (01:02:53):
Oh that's just plain silly.

Speaker 22 (01:02:54):
Maybe it's just plain silly. But today she got a
seat on the Sunset bus.

Speaker 50 (01:03:00):
You know, I just got a frighten.

Speaker 1 (01:03:05):
Do you know this is a little scary? It may
not be so easy. Just how do you get rid
of a camel?

Speaker 6 (01:03:10):
Well, I don't know.

Speaker 22 (01:03:11):
I guess the best thing to do would be to
call the zoo.

Speaker 1 (01:03:13):
Well that sounds logical.

Speaker 22 (01:03:14):
Sure, they need all kinds of wild animals. Let me see,
here's the number. I'll call them right now.

Speaker 16 (01:03:26):
Hello, Hello, is this the zoo?

Speaker 6 (01:03:28):
That's right.

Speaker 22 (01:03:29):
Well, my name is Nelson, and I have a camel.

Speaker 16 (01:03:32):
Glad to know you.

Speaker 6 (01:03:35):
My name is Mike, and I got three of them.

Speaker 22 (01:03:38):
I'm afraid I didn't make myself clear. You see I
don't like this camel very much.

Speaker 43 (01:03:41):
Oh you don't.

Speaker 16 (01:03:42):
No, Well, i'll tell you something surprising.

Speaker 35 (01:03:45):
I ain't ever been caught.

Speaker 6 (01:03:46):
With my arm around any one of these either.

Speaker 22 (01:03:49):
Look, I'll come right to the point.

Speaker 6 (01:03:51):
No, keep me kissing, it's intriguing.

Speaker 22 (01:03:55):
What I'd like to do is donate my camel to
the zoo. Oh see, after all, you only have three
camels there now, and you want to.

Speaker 6 (01:04:02):
Make it four.

Speaker 22 (01:04:03):
That's right.

Speaker 16 (01:04:04):
I'll tell you what i'd do.

Speaker 43 (01:04:06):
Just as soon as they give any indication that they
want to sit down and play bridge, I'll let you know.

Speaker 16 (01:04:13):
How do you like that?

Speaker 22 (01:04:14):
I thought the zoo would be happy to get a camel.

Speaker 1 (01:04:16):
Say, this might not be so easy getting rid of him.

Speaker 22 (01:04:18):
All is none to worry about, Harriet. I'll call a
circus here in town. I'll try the movie studios. Of course,
if worse comes to worse is always one thing we
can do. What's that We can always throw a saddle
on them and sell them to Bing Crosby. Something tells

(01:04:41):
me Ozzie and Harriet are going to have their work
cut out for them. Let's turn from Ozzie and Harriet
temporarily to another young couple. It doesn't matter who they are.
What matters are the words that the man is saying.

Speaker 6 (01:04:51):
I'm home for good, darling. I got my discharge papers today.

Speaker 16 (01:04:55):
Right now.

Speaker 48 (01:04:55):
Those are probably the happiest words a wife can hear.
The day she hear where's them, life begins again. All
the dreams she's had now they can come true. The
home they plan, now they can have it. One of
the first things they'll want. One of the first things
you'll want, if you're that young couple, will be fine
silver and international Sterling silver is very fine. It's solid

(01:05:18):
silver through and through. You can tell just by looking
at it that only silversmiths of exceptional skill and long
experience could create patterns so lovely. And if you stop
to inquire, you'd find that the traditions of international sterling.
Silversmiths are more than a century old. That the men
who create today's beautiful international sterling patterns are successors to

(01:05:40):
those early Americans who made spoons of coin silver. International
sterling silver is something real and permanent. Your international sterling
remains indestructible and beautiful all the days of your life.
That's the kind of silver to build a home with.
And these are the words that will get it for you,
International sterling silver.

Speaker 22 (01:06:07):
We bring you nowt the delightful singing of the four
famous king Sisters.

Speaker 6 (01:06:12):
TV Time.

Speaker 30 (01:06:20):
Long Ass stars are in the blue.

Speaker 32 (01:06:26):
Long Ass.

Speaker 50 (01:06:28):
There's a string of purchasing.

Speaker 31 (01:06:31):
Algon Longving New.

Speaker 16 (01:06:39):
Kim Time.

Speaker 45 (01:06:45):
Long Ass roses bloom in me.

Speaker 32 (01:06:52):
My love for you.

Speaker 53 (01:06:56):
Roady with the.

Speaker 54 (01:07:01):
Bay day to the world.

Speaker 4 (01:07:12):
Each mouse you disappeared.

Speaker 35 (01:07:19):
Will be there for you.

Speaker 44 (01:07:20):
To carry through that.

Speaker 35 (01:07:25):
Suiting.

Speaker 55 (01:07:30):
So take my.

Speaker 1 (01:07:33):
Please, surrender.

Speaker 45 (01:07:37):
And rely day, love.

Speaker 32 (01:07:46):
You, love and.

Speaker 16 (01:07:49):
Live for.

Speaker 5 (01:07:51):
Till the.

Speaker 32 (01:07:58):
Job well.

Speaker 48 (01:08:14):
Ozzie and Harriet have been trying desperately to get rid
of the camel that was sent them by an Arabian
prince whom they had befriended. Not only is the camel
less than beautiful, but he also has a very unfortunate personality.
In fact, the neighbors are threatening to make things difficult
if Ozzie doesn't get rid of tall Tan and Tangy.
As our scene opens, he's still phoning trying to dispose
of the Prince's aromatic gifts.

Speaker 22 (01:08:39):
Hello, I have a camel here. Hello, I have a
camel here.

Speaker 16 (01:08:52):
Hello, I have a.

Speaker 22 (01:08:55):
Well you can wait a minute, I minus set a
pair of nylons.

Speaker 1 (01:09:00):
Well, you better think of something, Ozzie. We call the
zoo the circus in practically every movie studio in town.

Speaker 22 (01:09:06):
Hey, wait a minute, there's still one movie studio left.
Maybe this is the right place. Hello, could I speak
to someone in production?

Speaker 16 (01:09:17):
Please?

Speaker 22 (01:09:18):
That's right? Hello, I have a camel here, and I
was wondering whether you could use him over at your
studio or you do? Well, he's a really fine camel,
and I'm what's that?

Speaker 32 (01:09:32):
Oh?

Speaker 22 (01:09:32):
Well thanks, just the same, goodbye?

Speaker 1 (01:09:35):
Well what went wrong that time?

Speaker 22 (01:09:37):
They need one that's trained?

Speaker 31 (01:09:38):
Well?

Speaker 1 (01:09:38):
Ours is trained for.

Speaker 22 (01:09:40):
A tap dance with gene Kelly.

Speaker 1 (01:09:45):
What do you think we better do about him?

Speaker 22 (01:09:47):
Well, first, I think we ought to burn some old
rubber and feathers in the incinerated to cover up the smell. Well,
it certainly is a pressive around here today, and.

Speaker 1 (01:09:56):
It isn't the heat or the humidity. It's a camel.
How are we gonna get rid of him?

Speaker 22 (01:10:01):
I wonder if we kept him locked up in there,
if it'd be possible for him to get so he
couldn't stand himself.

Speaker 1 (01:10:12):
No, I don't think so.

Speaker 22 (01:10:13):
I wonder if we should try to give him a
rub down with mum.

Speaker 1 (01:10:18):
It won't work. Look what happened yesterday when I tried
to wash him with life boy what he ate six
bars and stood out there blowing soap bubbles through him.

Speaker 22 (01:10:28):
I'm afraid to answer the door anymore. Every time I go,
it's another neighbor complaining.

Speaker 1 (01:10:32):
You know, I've been thinking this over, and there's only
one thing to do. What's that send the camel right
back to Bazarkistan where he came from. We can write
a very courteous letter, you know, dear Prince, thanks for
the gift, but we just can't handle it.

Speaker 22 (01:10:44):
By golly, I think you're right. You know, we seemed
like such an intelligent guy. I can't imagine I'm sending
us a camel. It's really your turn, but I'll get it.

Speaker 1 (01:10:54):
Let's face it together.

Speaker 43 (01:10:55):
Dear, good afternoon, missus Ozzie Nelson.

Speaker 35 (01:11:01):
Well, that depends the mister missus.

Speaker 43 (01:11:03):
Aussie Nelson, who received the gift of a camel from Oh.

Speaker 6 (01:11:07):
Yes, this is the plane, but what can we do
for you?

Speaker 43 (01:11:12):
My name is Monroe, Thomas Jefferson Monroe with the State Department, Washington,
d C.

Speaker 1 (01:11:17):
Oh, won't you come in?

Speaker 6 (01:11:18):
Thanks?

Speaker 22 (01:11:20):
We received the camel from Prince Allly Magogo of Bizarkistan, Arabia.

Speaker 43 (01:11:24):
Splendid, mister Nelson, splendid. It was with great pleasure that
we heard that you were honored by this gift from
the Prince.

Speaker 22 (01:11:30):
What is your interest in the camel, Miss Monroe?

Speaker 43 (01:11:32):
Well, we of the State Department are always greatly pleased
at an expression of goodwill between another country and ours.
Such a little matters go a long way, Todds, strengthening
and cementing deeper relationships between nations. Therefore, it is with
great satisfaction that I take note of the fact that
with this camel, friendships have become I might say.

Speaker 22 (01:11:53):
Ripened, you might even say over ripen.

Speaker 16 (01:11:57):
I'm sure the Prince sent you a fine animal.

Speaker 22 (01:11:59):
You better go out and take a look now if
you want to see him, because I'm shipping them back
to Ali Magaga today.

Speaker 43 (01:12:04):
You're doing what, mister Nelson. You don't know what you're saying.
You can't ship that camel back. That would constitute an
insult of the greatest proportions. Please, mister Nelson.

Speaker 22 (01:12:15):
I'm sorry, but I can't keep them here. We've had
nothing but complaints ever since he arrived. You mean the neighbors,
not only the neighbors. We got a call from a
flower shop in Glendale at two hundred petunias had curled
up and died.

Speaker 43 (01:12:29):
Well, I hate to apply pressure, mister Nelson, but as
a representative of the State Department, I must appeal to
your patriotism.

Speaker 35 (01:12:36):
I must insist.

Speaker 16 (01:12:36):
But you reconsider you.

Speaker 43 (01:12:38):
Mean we have to keep the camel that of course,
the Prince would be horribly offended if you got rid
of the animal.

Speaker 1 (01:12:43):
Well, we're offended now constantly.

Speaker 22 (01:12:46):
This is the same thing as asking us to move.

Speaker 43 (01:12:48):
Mister Nelson, I'm sure you wouldn't want to do anything
that might lead to international complications.

Speaker 22 (01:12:53):
Well, I can't believe it make that difference. Frankly, I'm
from Missouri.

Speaker 43 (01:12:57):
Oh you are from Missouri. In that case, maybe something
can be done about it at the White House.

Speaker 35 (01:13:06):
In the meantime, don't get rid.

Speaker 16 (01:13:08):
Of that camel.

Speaker 22 (01:13:19):
Oh, Harriet, this is the worst mess I've ever been
in the State Department won't let me send the camel back,
and the police and the neighbors refuse to let me
keep it, like having your pants catch on fire in
front of the YWCA.

Speaker 1 (01:13:32):
Well, the only thing left to do is try and
bluff it out, you know that. Do's just pretend we
haven't got any camel around here, no matter what the
neighbors say.

Speaker 22 (01:13:39):
Well, we can try, I suppose.

Speaker 1 (01:13:41):
Oh oh, look here comes missus broad Street up the walk,
and she looks awfully mad.

Speaker 22 (01:13:46):
Well, just stick to our story. We don't have a camel.

Speaker 43 (01:13:52):
I've stood for a lot of things from neighbors in
my time.

Speaker 34 (01:13:55):
It is for mister Nelson.

Speaker 27 (01:13:57):
But you've just got to get rid of that camel.

Speaker 50 (01:14:00):
Yes, that camel of.

Speaker 22 (01:14:01):
Yours has got to go, or you must be mistaken,
Missus Broadstreet. We have no camel here. All Missus Nelson
and I have are two sons.

Speaker 27 (01:14:09):
Then the one with the long tail, just ate all
the water.

Speaker 34 (01:14:15):
The wals off my line.

Speaker 27 (01:14:16):
It was simply disgraceful and don't tell me it wasn't
a camel.

Speaker 36 (01:14:20):
I saw with my own eyes what was chasing me.

Speaker 35 (01:14:23):
He was chasing you, That's what I said.

Speaker 16 (01:14:26):
He chased me.

Speaker 34 (01:14:26):
Around and around my victory garden until he knocked me flat.

Speaker 44 (01:14:30):
On my Brussels sprout.

Speaker 1 (01:14:35):
Oh, I'm sorry if he did any damage.

Speaker 36 (01:14:38):
Any damage?

Speaker 27 (01:14:39):
Why the clothesline alone?

Speaker 56 (01:14:40):
He ate two of my newest dresses, my favorite slip,
three pairs of stocking.

Speaker 30 (01:14:46):
And then.

Speaker 1 (01:14:49):
What's the matter?

Speaker 32 (01:14:50):
What did he eat?

Speaker 45 (01:14:50):
Then?

Speaker 16 (01:14:51):
I saved it all through the war.

Speaker 34 (01:14:55):
It was that wonderful rubber and it never crept up.

Speaker 1 (01:15:00):
We're still down.

Speaker 6 (01:15:07):
There there there.

Speaker 1 (01:15:08):
Now that's gone.

Speaker 34 (01:15:10):
I can't get into my clothes. Then my husband's going
to start calling me back.

Speaker 1 (01:15:17):
I'm terribly sorry.

Speaker 34 (01:15:25):
So am I goodbye?

Speaker 22 (01:15:36):
Oh golly, has she gone?

Speaker 5 (01:15:39):
Harriet?

Speaker 32 (01:15:40):
Uh?

Speaker 1 (01:15:41):
My turn?

Speaker 35 (01:15:43):
Oh remember me, I'm the delivery man. I brought you
that camel yesterday.

Speaker 1 (01:15:47):
Believe me, friend, We'll never forget you.

Speaker 35 (01:15:50):
Just answer one question. Just still have the camel.

Speaker 22 (01:15:52):
Yes, I'm afraid we do.

Speaker 35 (01:15:54):
Oh what a relief. It seems they made a mistake
at the transfer company and the camel ain't for you.

Speaker 1 (01:15:59):
Then this camel isn't a gift from Arabia.

Speaker 45 (01:16:02):
Oh yeah, yeah, but they.

Speaker 35 (01:16:03):
Got the tag switched.

Speaker 19 (01:16:05):
You see, he's supposed to go to the California Zoological
Society and Sacramento.

Speaker 22 (01:16:09):
Well, brother, that's the best news we've had in weeks.
He's right out in the garage, and the sooner you
take him, the better.

Speaker 35 (01:16:14):
Oh boy, that's fine. How do I get to the garage?

Speaker 22 (01:16:17):
He just step outside and follow your nose. How about that?
The camel wasn't for us? After all? I thought a
camel was an awful, strange sort of a gift.

Speaker 1 (01:16:26):
Hey, but wait a minute, Ozzie. No, we're right back,
or we started. If the camel was for somebody else,
I'm wondering what the prince said us.

Speaker 22 (01:16:34):
Well, we'll find you know something.

Speaker 1 (01:16:36):
Maybe it's a ruby after all. Oh that's silly, are
you kidding? After a camel, anything's possible.

Speaker 22 (01:16:43):
Well, you remember what my first guess was a beautiful
Arabian dancing girl.

Speaker 1 (01:16:48):
Oh sure, I can just picture the expression on your
face if you heard a knock on the door and
you opened it and there stood an Arabian dancing girl.

Speaker 36 (01:16:59):
Listen?

Speaker 6 (01:17:02):
Was that you no?

Speaker 1 (01:17:06):
Well open the door?

Speaker 50 (01:17:07):
Will you do it?

Speaker 20 (01:17:09):
Ah?

Speaker 16 (01:17:10):
Good?

Speaker 1 (01:17:10):
Afternoon sime. Greetings from Ravil. Well, don't just stand there, Ozzie,
say something.

Speaker 16 (01:17:25):
Well, I I I I.

Speaker 22 (01:17:38):
Ozzie and Harriett will go back in a moment.

Speaker 48 (01:17:41):
Meantime, A friendly suggestion to you, who will soon be
picking out the pattern for your family sober. A great
favorite with the women who have seen it, and one
of the loveliest patterns that International Stirling has ever created
is Enchantress. It's a pattern that uses both modern and
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cha tantras is a clear, lustrous panel of silver. The

(01:18:03):
ornament tiny sprays of flowers down the length of each side.
You'll like Enchantress. You'll like the way it dresses up
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You'll like the fact that you can start a service
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(01:18:24):
Why not visit your silverware dealer tomorrow, the one who
carries a display of International Sterling silver in his window.
Then you can see Enchantress for yourself and learn how
easily this beautiful solid silver can be yours. The pattern
is Enchantress, the creator's International Sterling. And now back to

(01:18:47):
Ozzy and Harriet.

Speaker 1 (01:18:49):
Oh, this is a very lovely place you have here.

Speaker 22 (01:18:52):
Say, oh, thank you.

Speaker 1 (01:18:54):
Would you like some more team cookies?

Speaker 44 (01:18:56):
Yes, thank you, They're very good.

Speaker 22 (01:18:58):
So you certainly speak good English. Where were you born?

Speaker 1 (01:19:01):
North Hollywood?

Speaker 22 (01:19:05):
North Hollywood.

Speaker 1 (01:19:07):
Weren't you sent here by Prince Ala mcgaggy of Bazarkistan Arabia?
Oh my goodness.

Speaker 22 (01:19:13):
No, Well then why are you wearing that Arabian dancing costume?

Speaker 16 (01:19:16):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (01:19:17):
I'm so glad you finally asked me that I wasn't
allowed to tell you until you did. You see, I'm
being initiated into a sorority at UCLA.

Speaker 48 (01:19:35):
International Silver Company, creators of International Sterling, invite you to
listen again next Sunday to the adventures of Ozzy and Harriet,
with songs by the King Sisters and music by Ozzie
Nelson's Orchestra.

Speaker 1 (01:19:47):
Oh oh, they have the most exciting news, is it?

Speaker 36 (01:19:50):
Harriet?

Speaker 1 (01:19:50):
The gift arrived and it's the most beautiful gift in
the world.

Speaker 16 (01:19:53):
Well what is it? Oh?

Speaker 1 (01:19:54):
I won't have to tell you, I'll just read the card.
It says even in far off Arabia. We know that
the solid silver with beauty that lives forever is international sterling.

Speaker 7 (01:20:15):
But of course, going back to nineteen forty five, on
this date eighty years ago, Ozzy and Harriet, you notice
the maid was played by b Benederre. You remember her
because it sounds just like the telephone operators on the

(01:20:39):
Jack Benny Show. But also that silverware is going to
be real expensive today. Back in nineteen forty five, silver
was about fifty two cents an ounce. Now what you
need to remember at fifty today silver is right around
forty two dollars a ounce, So just raw melt, that

(01:21:04):
silverware is going to be really pricey. It really is alrighty.
And that takes us out of our shows for Sunday,
October seventh, nineteen forty five, eighty years ago. Today on
Classic Radio Theater with Wyatcox Tomorrow, Barry Craig Confidential Investigator
with William Gargan from nineteen fifty two, Dick Calmer and

(01:21:25):
Boston Blackie from nineteen forty six, Gerald Moore and the
Adventures of Philip Marlow from nineteen forty nine, and we
go back to nineteen thirty six for an episode of
Calling All Cars On Thursday. Yeah, we'll get some comedy again,
a very special show from the Phil Harris Allis Say Show.
And this is one of those things that we get

(01:21:47):
a few of. We got a lot from Jack Benny,
but not very many from Phil Farris, Phil Harrison, Alice Faith.
This is an unedited check from the day of recording
nineteen fifty three, so you'll get to hear the warm up,
the introduction of everybody in the show, Alice's first date.
You'll also hear that's from nineteen fifty three, Fiver McGee

(01:22:11):
and Molly from nineteen forty five as they go out
to buy a new used car, The Great Guildersleep from
nineteen forty six, is Leela Releevestown and Betty the Crooner
an episode of Father Knows Best from nineteen fifty two.
More comedy on Friday with Amos and Andy from nineteen
forty eight, the Aldridge Family from nineteen thirty nine, Lomon
Abner from nineteen forty eight, and Jack Benny from nineteen

(01:22:33):
thirty seven. Of the course we'll have Claudia with all
of those shows. On Saturday, we'll have an episode of
Counterspy Escape, the Lineup and Suspense. On Sunday, Jack Benny,
Groucho Marks and You Bet Your Life, another episode of
Father Knows Best and The Bob Hope Show. A Monday

(01:22:53):
Counter Spy, Mister Keen, Tracer, Lost Persons, another episode of
Barry Craig and Escape, and a week from Today more
Comedy with My Favorite Husband, a nineteen fifty one episode
of Jack Benny as he tries to get his song published,
Charlie McCarthy with the incomparable Hildegard from nineteen forty five,

(01:23:14):
and Milton Burrell salutes the theater. That's all coming up
in the next seven days here on Classic Radio Theater
with Wyatt Cogs up next as promised, The Hoo's Your
hot Shots.

Speaker 57 (01:23:30):
Spring is nearly here, and many of our listeners will
be getting out their gardening tools. Their overalls are short,
stew again try their hands at raising.

Speaker 58 (01:23:38):
Their own vegetables.

Speaker 57 (01:23:39):
For most of us, gardening is an enjoyable hobby, and
it certainly is a great thrill to see the results
of your work come out of the ground rank before
your eyes. In other lands, many people will also be
watching their spring planting grow Care The Cooperative for American
remitlances to Europe. Proposes to help meet that need were

(01:24:00):
their new vegetables seed package.

Speaker 6 (01:24:02):
It contains twenty.

Speaker 57 (01:24:03):
Eight varieties of vegetables you can order for families in Europe.
To start planning, you should order the kre seed package
right away. Total cost with delivery guaranteed he is four dollars.
Send your orders to non profit Care fifty Vaunt Street,
New York and help a family help themselves.

Speaker 7 (01:24:23):
So the Hoosier Hotshots were a quartet. They entertained on stage, screen, radio,
and records from the mid thirties into the seventies. As
one would expect from their name, they were formed in Indiana,
the Hoosiers state, where they performed on local radio, moving
to Chicago and ended up going nationwide, and they starred

(01:24:43):
in Western movies and they had a whole big old
time over the years. And we're going to hear this
episode of the Hoosier hot Shots radio show as it
was originally broadcast seventy five years years ago October seventh,
nineteen fifty.

Speaker 25 (01:25:04):
This is the Who's Your hot Shot Show? It's the
internationally famous, the original Who's Your hot Shots? Darring has
a Ken Gillen Gabe bless their own very special little darling,
Anita Gordon. What this is Larry Chatterton inviting you to

(01:25:29):
visit our hometown for another half hour. Fun fans, you'll
go to the Little Red Schoolhouse, to the concert in
the park with the hometown band, and to the Civic
auditorium for a speech from the Hometown Order. All wrestled
up here for you by those hilarious and unpredictable who's
your hot shots?

Speaker 21 (01:25:44):
I'm all out of breath, ken, Where are you down
in jungle Town?

Speaker 24 (01:25:48):
Well then tell us about.

Speaker 16 (01:25:49):
It, but we'll do it.

Speaker 12 (01:25:51):
Are you ready?

Speaker 16 (01:25:53):
I'll hold your half.

Speaker 37 (01:25:55):
Here we go.

Speaker 24 (01:26:03):
Down in jungle Town. Honeymoon, it's coming soon.

Speaker 59 (01:26:09):
Then you'll hear a Sarah name to a bready monkey man.
And in Monkey Lamb, the chimpanzees sing in the trees,
chill be you two, monkey doodle do way down in
John Come.

Speaker 24 (01:27:02):
Guess.

Speaker 25 (01:27:09):
And that was down in jungle Town, played by three
natives and a long, tall, skinny baboon na.

Speaker 46 (01:27:15):
Just a minute there, boy, was there anything personal in
that remark?

Speaker 16 (01:27:19):
What's the matter? Hes he?

Speaker 44 (01:27:20):
You?

Speaker 25 (01:27:20):
Self conscious?

Speaker 16 (01:27:21):
Well? What if I am? You?

Speaker 46 (01:27:23):
Better quit picking on here. I'm gonna count your ribs
for you from the inside.

Speaker 21 (01:27:28):
How easy does it?

Speaker 6 (01:27:29):
Heasy?

Speaker 21 (01:27:29):
Forget Larry and turn around and say hello to the folks.

Speaker 46 (01:27:32):
Oh, did somebody come to sist?

Speaker 21 (01:27:34):
Certainly?

Speaker 32 (01:27:34):
Look well, i'll people look at the people.

Speaker 21 (01:27:38):
Hello, yes, hello folks, and welcome to our hometown for
another half hour of social sesshion.

Speaker 46 (01:27:47):
Hey boy, you know me and my gull went sashang
last night?

Speaker 16 (01:27:50):
Yeah?

Speaker 21 (01:27:50):
Which giral we out with?

Speaker 16 (01:27:51):
He?

Speaker 30 (01:27:51):
He?

Speaker 46 (01:27:52):
Which one?

Speaker 21 (01:27:52):
Yeah?

Speaker 16 (01:27:53):
Yeah?

Speaker 46 (01:27:54):
Oh, I went out with the dumb one.

Speaker 6 (01:27:56):
Of course, you do.

Speaker 30 (01:27:59):
What?

Speaker 21 (01:27:59):
You keep going around with her? Has he cuse she
can't get ahead of me?

Speaker 46 (01:28:03):
I'm too smart?

Speaker 21 (01:28:04):
You mean she's too dumb?

Speaker 12 (01:28:06):
Hey, what's the matter with you?

Speaker 16 (01:28:07):
Guys?

Speaker 12 (01:28:07):
Aren't you gonna play anything or something or anything or nothing?

Speaker 21 (01:28:10):
I'm sure game, sure we're gonna play something.

Speaker 12 (01:28:12):
Well, then let's do it. My hands are getting cold while.

Speaker 46 (01:28:14):
They're shitting with all this hot air.

Speaker 21 (01:28:16):
These guys are blowing around. Okay, now, all right, fellows,
all right, all right, now let's do the old girl Meddley.

Speaker 46 (01:28:22):
Yeah, I hear you say, girl, that's what I said.

Speaker 32 (01:28:25):
That's for me.

Speaker 39 (01:28:27):
Okay, here we go, I said, right, it's just a
glimpse of heaven.

Speaker 42 (01:28:43):
When my baby smiles at me, When my baby smile,
Take Kenny, when she smiles at me?

Speaker 24 (01:28:51):
Do you know what I think? What's that? Gabriel?

Speaker 31 (01:28:54):
Oh?

Speaker 32 (01:28:55):
God, up a little bit.

Speaker 24 (01:28:57):
Close to her?

Speaker 12 (01:28:58):
All love he love he love me mine God.

Speaker 59 (01:29:03):
Laughing me mile lipto cleaning.

Speaker 60 (01:29:06):
Mine, like to finishing sorrows, like to make a comfy call.
See causel from head to tallsie love mine.

Speaker 46 (01:29:22):
You know I thought of one while ago, but I
can't seem to think of it right now or concentrate.

Speaker 16 (01:29:26):
Has he?

Speaker 23 (01:29:30):
Ain't she sweet? That's it?

Speaker 29 (01:29:33):
Not bad?

Speaker 12 (01:29:34):
Ain't she nice?

Speaker 42 (01:29:35):
Look over one circumpany I'm looking, I ask you very confidentially.

Speaker 24 (01:29:39):
Ain't she nice?

Speaker 12 (01:29:40):
Cast your second roll in her direction?

Speaker 46 (01:29:43):
Red hat, green hat, gien hat.

Speaker 12 (01:29:45):
Ain't she perfection?

Speaker 6 (01:29:46):
I'm mad?

Speaker 12 (01:29:47):
I harry beat.

Speaker 24 (01:29:48):
I think she's hitched.

Speaker 12 (01:29:50):
Say listen, are you looking or listening?

Speaker 46 (01:29:53):
I ain't listening. There's a good old timer. Everybody knows
it goes something like this.

Speaker 61 (01:30:00):
If the baby has the collic in the middle of
the night, turn it over, change the needle.

Speaker 24 (01:30:06):
Everybody loves the baby. That's why I'm in love with you,
pretty baby, pretty baby.

Speaker 30 (01:30:13):
Oh.

Speaker 24 (01:30:13):
I want to love my baby and if might as
well be you, and I'll let him.

Speaker 6 (01:30:17):
Prady baby off my.

Speaker 32 (01:30:22):
Oh, I will call you beautiful doll.

Speaker 17 (01:30:25):
You read big beautiful dostration.

Speaker 21 (01:30:29):
I am glad that I have found you.

Speaker 17 (01:30:32):
Let let me up my arms around you. Oh beautiful you,
beautiful doll. You read big beautiful doll. When I'm around you,
how my heart does ache.

Speaker 23 (01:30:46):
I'd like to squeeze you, but.

Speaker 24 (01:30:47):
I fear you'd break.

Speaker 30 (01:30:49):
Oh oh, oh, oh, great, big beautiful doll.

Speaker 6 (01:30:56):
I want a girl just like a.

Speaker 24 (01:30:59):
Girl, get married, ally, came, I what a girl just
like the girl? Get married?

Speaker 21 (01:31:36):
Well, thank you, false, thank you very much. Now prepare
yourselves for a real tree. Here's where we bring out
our own little darling.

Speaker 6 (01:31:42):
I need a garden, and he's here.

Speaker 32 (01:31:49):
Thank you.

Speaker 62 (01:31:50):
Ken, Hello, everybody, say Ken, what's this? I hear about
you having a long skinny baboon on the show tonight.

Speaker 46 (01:31:58):
Now you cut that out.

Speaker 21 (01:32:00):
Oh that's enough, heasy babboon. I'll want your song, honey.

Speaker 26 (01:32:06):
Mad about you?

Speaker 21 (01:32:07):
Oh that's fine, let's hear it.

Speaker 51 (01:32:26):
Mad about you? Mad about you?

Speaker 32 (01:32:32):
I can't lie.

Speaker 63 (01:32:36):
I'm mad about you. Mad about you, though, I said
to my home for oh, I love the inchant.

Speaker 24 (01:32:57):
All it allow.

Speaker 51 (01:33:08):
All the dreams I've had about you, and you didn't
know that I've got it bad about you. Wrest your
lips to my lip, say hold me.

Speaker 53 (01:33:31):
So, Ni.

Speaker 51 (01:33:35):
Can't you see I'm mad about you? If you knew
all the dreams I've had about you, then you'd know.

Speaker 16 (01:34:02):
That I.

Speaker 51 (01:34:04):
Got it bad about it. Press your lips to my
lips and hold mean.

Speaker 32 (01:34:17):
So Nie.

Speaker 51 (01:34:21):
Cat, you see I'm mad about.

Speaker 25 (01:34:44):
Oh mighty mighty nights, Anita. But now you better hurry
up and find your horn room glasses and get your
hair down up on a little knot on the top
of your head, for you are about to become miss
Letitia Tinker straight lace school marm in our hometown. Ladies
and gentlemen, we bring you hellow down on higher education,

(01:35:05):
or which we take you to the little Red schoolhouse
down in Rotten Apple, Tennessee.

Speaker 45 (01:35:25):
Hi, you Munds.

Speaker 21 (01:35:26):
Were you speaking to us, mysteaker?

Speaker 32 (01:35:28):
Yes?

Speaker 30 (01:35:28):
I was.

Speaker 21 (01:35:29):
What was it you wanted?

Speaker 6 (01:35:30):
Teacher?

Speaker 64 (01:35:31):
I want quiet?

Speaker 21 (01:35:32):
Well, you got it good, but it might get kind
of dull.

Speaker 64 (01:35:35):
I don't think so well.

Speaker 21 (01:35:37):
I don't everybody to his opinion, said the old woman
as she kissed the cow.

Speaker 12 (01:35:42):
Gilbert. Never mind teacher.

Speaker 64 (01:35:46):
Yes, gabriel did you ever kiss a cow?

Speaker 35 (01:35:49):
No?

Speaker 21 (01:35:50):
What you got against cow's teach?

Speaker 16 (01:35:52):
Nothing?

Speaker 12 (01:35:53):
Nothing at all?

Speaker 21 (01:35:54):
And why do you want to kiss him?

Speaker 50 (01:35:56):
Never mind?

Speaker 62 (01:35:57):
I don't want to kiss a cow. I don't want
to hear any more about And that's final. Does everybody
understand that? Well, let's forget it for now and i'll
explain it to you later. What, Hezekiah, what are you
doing with that cow in the classroom?

Speaker 46 (01:36:17):
Oh, teacher, she gets lonesome at home.

Speaker 64 (01:36:19):
Well, she's got no business in this school.

Speaker 46 (01:36:22):
I don't know about that. She's a great age student.

Speaker 64 (01:36:27):
That will be enough, Hezekiah.

Speaker 62 (01:36:30):
No, students, today's the day Kennikaboodle reads us the essay
he has written.

Speaker 12 (01:36:35):
Kenny wrote an essay.

Speaker 62 (01:36:37):
Yes, Gabrielle, what does his essay essay? If you'll be quiet,
we'll find out. And that was a bad pun anyway.

Speaker 12 (01:36:48):
Oh, now you're just jealous because you didn't think of
a teacher.

Speaker 27 (01:36:51):
All dry up.

Speaker 12 (01:36:55):
I wasn't talking to you.

Speaker 64 (01:37:00):
Now, Kenny. Are you ready to read your.

Speaker 21 (01:37:02):
Essay or do I have to teacher?

Speaker 16 (01:37:05):
Oh?

Speaker 64 (01:37:05):
Certainly we're all looking.

Speaker 6 (01:37:07):
Forward to it.

Speaker 21 (01:37:08):
Thank for yourself, teacher.

Speaker 62 (01:37:10):
That's enough, Gilbert, Yes, miss Stinker. All right, Kenny, give
your title for your essay.

Speaker 64 (01:37:17):
And go ahead.

Speaker 21 (01:37:18):
Okay, teacher, you asked for my essay on love by
Kenneth x Kaboodle.

Speaker 64 (01:37:28):
Why class, Go ahead, Kenny.

Speaker 21 (01:37:30):
Love comes in two kinds, romance and puppy.

Speaker 12 (01:37:36):
My dog asks, please, Gabrielle. I'm gonna enter my dog
in the dog show next week.

Speaker 23 (01:37:42):
Teacher.

Speaker 64 (01:37:42):
Oh, do you think he'll win a prize?

Speaker 12 (01:37:44):
No, but he you'll meet some very nice dogs.

Speaker 30 (01:37:48):
You know.

Speaker 46 (01:37:49):
No, I'm gonna teach my dog to cook.

Speaker 64 (01:37:51):
Oh that's silly, has a kaya? What makes you think
your dog can learn to cook?

Speaker 46 (01:37:55):
Because he's a pothound?

Speaker 26 (01:37:57):
A potthound?

Speaker 46 (01:38:00):
Oh, he's a cocker spaniel.

Speaker 50 (01:38:05):
That's enough.

Speaker 64 (01:38:06):
Go ahead, Kenny, continue your essay on love.

Speaker 21 (01:38:09):
There is nothing like love. Everybody ought to have it.
You should love thy neighbor.

Speaker 46 (01:38:17):
Well, I don't know about that.

Speaker 64 (01:38:19):
Why, Gilbert, of course, you should love thy neighbor.

Speaker 21 (01:38:22):
Seems kind of dangerous to me. Why what do you
mean I love my neighbor? What's my neighbor's husband gonna
think about it?

Speaker 64 (01:38:31):
Never mind, Gilbert, just forget the whole thing.

Speaker 21 (01:38:34):
Yeah, I reckon, It's safer that way.

Speaker 64 (01:38:36):
Quiet Gilbert, go ahead, Kenny.

Speaker 21 (01:38:39):
There are three things to think about love, courtship, and
the consequences. One thing leads to the other.

Speaker 46 (01:38:49):
Well, you ain't kidding, you know. My Paul got the consequences.

Speaker 16 (01:38:53):
Yeah.

Speaker 46 (01:38:53):
You U should see a bump on his head.

Speaker 64 (01:38:56):
Is it a love bump as a car?

Speaker 20 (01:38:57):
Yeah?

Speaker 46 (01:38:58):
But it was made with a frying pie.

Speaker 64 (01:39:01):
That's enough, Hessy, go ahead, Kenny.

Speaker 21 (01:39:04):
Well it's right. I'm going I'm not never going to
get nothing said about love, no how anyway.

Speaker 16 (01:39:09):
Either So there, Hey.

Speaker 46 (01:39:11):
Would you mind repeating that sentence?

Speaker 12 (01:39:13):
Never mind, teacher?

Speaker 26 (01:39:16):
What is it now?

Speaker 12 (01:39:16):
Gabrielle bomb Lop saddle down at the general store. He
said he fell in love with you at first sight?

Speaker 32 (01:39:22):
Oh he did?

Speaker 16 (01:39:26):
Yeah he did.

Speaker 64 (01:39:28):
Well, that's funny. He hasn't been around.

Speaker 32 (01:39:30):
Yeah, I know.

Speaker 34 (01:39:32):
How do you count for that?

Speaker 57 (01:39:33):
Well?

Speaker 12 (01:39:33):
I figure he took a second look.

Speaker 64 (01:39:41):
I don't think that was very funny. That's enough, Gilbert,
finish your essay, Kenny.

Speaker 21 (01:39:48):
Love is the thing that fills your heart with the
milk of human kindness.

Speaker 65 (01:39:57):
You gotta be careful how you talk about milk, Kenny,
obss sensitive.

Speaker 21 (01:40:02):
And in conclusion, I would say that love is the
feeling that makes a woman, make a man make a
fool of himself.

Speaker 46 (01:40:09):
I thank you what for?

Speaker 6 (01:40:11):
Oh he's finished well, Folks.

Speaker 21 (01:40:33):
Ever since the days of pow wows between the Indians
and the settlers, the people of our great country have
expressed themselves in music. A lot of songs they sang
now come under the heading of folk music. And here's
a fellow who knows how to sing him. Alan Massey
sings the saga of the Blue Tail Fly.

Speaker 66 (01:40:49):
All right, Alan, When I was young, I used to
wait on master, give him his plate, and passed the
bottle when he got dry.

Speaker 53 (01:41:06):
Brush showway the blue tail Fly.

Speaker 67 (01:41:09):
Jimmy crack Car, and I don't care. Jimmy crack Car,
and I don't care.

Speaker 21 (01:41:15):
Jimmy crack Car, and.

Speaker 23 (01:41:17):
I don't care. My master's gone away.

Speaker 53 (01:41:22):
And when he'd ride in the afternoon, I'd follow after
with a hickory broom, the pony being rather shot when
biden by the blue tail fly.

Speaker 67 (01:41:38):
Jimmy crack Car and I don't care. Jimmy crack Car
and I don't care. Jimmy crack Car, and I don't care.

Speaker 23 (01:41:47):
My Master's gone away.

Speaker 53 (01:41:50):
The pony run, He jumped, he pitched, he threw my
master in the ditch.

Speaker 32 (01:41:58):
He died.

Speaker 53 (01:41:59):
The jew read wondered why.

Speaker 66 (01:42:03):
The verdict was a blue tail fly Jimmy crack Car
and I don't care.

Speaker 23 (01:42:09):
and I don't care. My Master's gone away.

Speaker 66 (01:42:19):
They lay him under a Simon tree. His epithetph is
there to see beneath the stone. I'm forced to lie
a victim of the blue tail flying.

Speaker 11 (01:42:34):
and I don't care. Jimmy crack Car, and I don't care.
My Master's gone on.

Speaker 21 (01:42:57):
Well, thank you, Alan Massey, you were really fine. Now
here's a young man who deals in Mordern romance. Yep, folks,
that theme introduces the boy lives next door? Who's your hotshot?

Speaker 6 (01:43:12):
Gil Taylor?

Speaker 21 (01:43:13):
Come on in, Gilbert, I think you Ken? Say how
about a little love song?

Speaker 16 (01:43:16):
Gil?

Speaker 21 (01:43:17):
Well, mister Ken, it seems to me like I've been
overloaded with love today, you think, so? Yep, getting kind
of icky around here. I'll never mind that and put
Gil Hooley back in the sack. Now sing us a song? Okay, Ken,
here's I'm always chasing rainbows. All right, fine, let's hear
gil Okay, Bobby.

Speaker 13 (01:43:44):
I'm allways chasing rain boots, watching clubs, drifting by. My
skins are just like all my dream.

Speaker 32 (01:44:09):
Ending in.

Speaker 16 (01:44:11):
The sky.

Speaker 13 (01:44:16):
Some fellas looking find the sunshine, always looking find the rain.
Some fellows make a winning Sometimes I never even make
a game. Believe me, I'm always chasing rain board, waiting

(01:44:41):
to find a little bluebird in vain. Some fellaws looking
find the sunshine, always looking.

Speaker 46 (01:44:55):
Find the rain.

Speaker 13 (01:44:58):
Some fellows make a winning Sometimes.

Speaker 32 (01:45:02):
I never even make a game.

Speaker 13 (01:45:07):
Really, uh, always chasing gray waiting to find a little
blue bird.

Speaker 25 (01:45:40):
Just to break up this love routine, here comes Heasy
with that world famous wabash washboard. Delete the Hoosier hotshots
through a novely version of that tune you used to
pick out on the piano with two fingers.

Speaker 16 (01:45:50):
Listen to chopsticks.

Speaker 24 (01:45:54):
Okay, chopsticks, so chopsticks.

Speaker 60 (01:46:03):
There's nothing like chopsticks to help many romance along.

Speaker 68 (01:46:08):
Four hands start playing and two heads start swaying, and
two hearts start.

Speaker 24 (01:46:12):
Singing a song.

Speaker 68 (01:46:15):
If one of us make any music mistakes while we're
chop chop, chop, chop under six. No need to get mad,
for there's nothing think so bad that a cup full
of kisses can't fix.

Speaker 41 (01:46:28):
Let's lead together and we'll find out whether there will live.

Speaker 24 (01:46:32):
Be really into don't there to stop till our hearts
go pop up?

Speaker 23 (01:46:38):
While we chop chop, chop chop.

Speaker 24 (01:46:39):
Fund the sticks.

Speaker 35 (01:46:43):
Four hands with me.

Speaker 69 (01:46:47):
Two fingers, one finger, seven fingers, four fingers.

Speaker 25 (01:47:17):
You're s s, I say, I'll bet you never heard

(01:48:20):
chopsticks played like that before.

Speaker 21 (01:48:21):
Yeah, I tried, land you may never hear it played
like that again.

Speaker 25 (01:48:25):
Oh, we enjoyed every splinter of it can. But now
it's time to get over to the civic auditorium in
our hometown. Will you have with us a speaker of note?
In fact, you'll note that when he speaks, he says
nothing you'll want to remember. So just remember that I
warned you as you listen to so Hoo's your hometown
order gave me us word.

Speaker 32 (01:48:44):
Us uh.

Speaker 6 (01:48:52):
Uh ah.

Speaker 42 (01:48:55):
When I say hello ladies and gentlemen, I'm being polite.
That's etiquette. I don't understand entirely about etikot. If you
talk too much, it's bad manners. If you don't, people
say or don't. If you eat with your knife, you're

(01:49:19):
ill mannered. If you don't, you might starve to death.
In the restaurant, they told me to tip the waiter.
I tried it, but I tipped him too far and
he fell over and spilled the soup on my girl
and she left me for a half back. At my

(01:49:44):
sister's wedding, I was a drawback, am I sure? They
told me to seat the bride's mother on my left
hand and the groom's mother on my right hand. I
sure had my hands full. I couldn't even applaud the preacher.

(01:50:08):
But I do know that you should not break your
bread or roll in your sup At the wedding. I
made at the wedding, I made a foxy passy. Uh
beg your pardon. You're from Indana, Okay, I'm from there too,

(01:50:31):
but that don't help me any.

Speaker 31 (01:50:33):
Uh.

Speaker 42 (01:50:35):
Somebody pointed at the guy at the wedding and said
he was the best man, and uh, I didn't think
he was, so I fit him, but he was.

Speaker 30 (01:50:50):
Okay.

Speaker 12 (01:50:52):
I got a black eye, and uh, things are getting black.
I can't think of it. Ah. Gee, thanks, you're welcome.

Speaker 42 (01:51:11):
Pleased to meet you. All those things are polite and
should be used. Ah, I'm finished.

Speaker 25 (01:51:30):
Well that's one way to prove things. Let's say we're
late for our date in the park. Who's your hot Shots?
Hometom band is warming up to give us a concert
and you can't miss it. You live again when you
hear the blare of the brass and the beat of
the pick bassed drum. So come on along for Redway.

Speaker 41 (01:52:16):
Now the moon shy s not rady, Red a way
a breeze, sigh God night for dry for a morning
star heart raid to sleep, all.

Speaker 61 (01:52:26):
Red weaving a heart away. Well, I guess that's about it, folks.

(01:53:32):
Time I got to get to see you later.

Speaker 25 (01:53:37):
This has been the Hoosier Hotshot Shows, Darring, Hesy, camp
Bill and Gabe, When the Wrong Very Special Little Darling
I Needa Gordon. Additional music is composed and conducted by
Bobby Armstrong. The program is directed by Jimmy Doolittle and
as a treats to a little production, wail your cards
and letters to the Hoo'sier hot Shots Mutual Broadcasting System
only on twenty eight California. Along till next time, all right,

(01:54:04):
Donavan's big, But who's your hot Dot y'all names of
the Mollybot.

Speaker 65 (01:54:10):
My name's Hartley, Hey schnipe, that is just riding by
and hoping you'll hear all the stars gathered to that
big radio rodeo This week in the world's biggest network
crowd YEP, It's Western Week on the Mutual Broadcasting System.

Speaker 7 (01:54:24):
There you have it, the Who's Your hot Shots? Seventy
five years ago October seventh, nineteen fifty here on Classic
Radio Theater with Liive Talks. Visit our web page at
Classic Radio Dot stream. Up next, we'll check in with
Uncle milty Is. He's like to who's your hot shots?
They're out in the Old West as well.

Speaker 28 (01:54:47):
How are your breaks not the ones in your car?
We're sure you keep those in tip top working order,
but how about your own breaks? Are they in working shape?
When you're behind the wheel of your car and you
feel that impulse to challenge legal speed limit?

Speaker 16 (01:55:01):
Can you stop that impulse on a dime?

Speaker 28 (01:55:03):
When a less courteous driver does something downright stupid that
may inconvenience you, are you likely to do something twice
as foolish just to show him he can't push you around?
Or can you say halt to your anger before it
leads to an accident. Students of human behavior have discovered
that most of the accidents on our highways are the
result of emotional immaturity. An adult can control his feelings

(01:55:27):
and concentrate on his goal. Don't let childish attitudes keep
you from reaching your destination. When other drivers and traffic
regulations annoy you, use the brakes in your head as
quickly as you would the ones on your car. Remember,
accidents don't have to happen.

Speaker 23 (01:55:44):
Nope, they don't.

Speaker 7 (01:55:45):
Milton burl Now from seventy eight years ago, October seventh,
nineteen forty seven, A salute to the Old West as
Milton tries to get in to see dear Will Xanik
while he's in Hollywood.

Speaker 16 (01:56:07):
Make no mistake.

Speaker 55 (01:56:08):
Of all leading cigarettes, only one is recognized by eminent
nose and throat specialists as definitely less irritating. That one
cigarette is Philip Morris. Johnny presents the Milton Berle Show.

(01:56:35):
Here comes Johnny, Ladies and gentlemen, to remind you if
every smoker knew what Philip Morris smokers know, they'd all
changed to Philip Morris.

Speaker 31 (01:56:44):
Yes, they'd all.

Speaker 37 (01:56:58):
On Radio City in New York here is the Milton
Borough Show with Burt Keltin, Jack Albertson, Billy SAMs, Johnny Gibson,
Frank Bolano, Arthur Minton, our singing Star, Dick Parney, the
music of a block in the orchestral and yours.

Speaker 55 (01:57:09):
Truly, Frank Kellen, Ladies and gentlemen. In recognition of the
rodeo currently appearing in New York, we salute the Old West,
the land of the forty nine er. Our star, Milton
Berle is a forty nine er. He measures exactly forty
nine around the waist, and here he is, Milton Burle.

Speaker 19 (01:57:33):
Thank you, thank you, thank you, and good evening, ladies, gentlemen,
and mister Gallup, I am shocked, I really am. I'm
utterly confounded at your fantastic insinuation that I'm fat of all.

Speaker 16 (01:57:45):
Words to describe Milton Burle.

Speaker 19 (01:57:47):
Husky yes, spelt yes, statuesque yes, but fat yes. Let's
get the record straight, mister Gallop. For the people listening
in who can't see me, the word that best describes me.

Speaker 35 (01:58:03):
Is stocky, live stocky.

Speaker 16 (01:58:08):
That was swift.

Speaker 19 (01:58:13):
You see, mister Gallup, what it means to have a
Milton Borough working with you. You come up with a
bad joke, and before it can die, I'm right in
there with the worst one. I've heard of jokes being
top before, but this is the first time that ever
wanted to be Don't.

Speaker 16 (01:58:26):
Go away, Shall I take it over for you? Please?
That's the first one that's ever been bottomed. It wasn't
worth it. But enough.

Speaker 19 (01:58:39):
Enough, enough personal talk about my weight battery will get
you nowhere. We have killed, they have killed too much
time already, mister Gallup. People aren't interested, So let's get
on with our subject. Very well, that's so fats So,
mister Gallup, I'm warning you don't stop physical jokes with me,
not in your condition. Waxy waxy. Well, let us face it,

(01:59:02):
mister Gallup, you are a thin one. You look like
you started to eat less when William Howard Taff told
you to.

Speaker 16 (01:59:16):
Mean.

Speaker 19 (01:59:17):
I mean, you'd better stay off the street on holidays.
Someone will run a flag up you.

Speaker 30 (01:59:25):
Birth.

Speaker 55 (01:59:25):
Perhaps I do look a bit peaked tired. Well, I've
had a rather exhausting week. The series, you know, oh,
the series?

Speaker 16 (01:59:32):
Who are you for, mister Gallup? The Yankees or the.

Speaker 55 (01:59:34):
Dodgers Yankees, Dodgers? Whatever are you talking about? The world
series baseball baseball?

Speaker 16 (01:59:39):
Are you mad?

Speaker 55 (01:59:40):
When I say series, I mean only one thing. The
mogulof for Dulsky String Quintet concert series.

Speaker 16 (01:59:48):
That sounds exciting, Oh it was?

Speaker 55 (01:59:50):
It was Deams Taylor and I were first in line
for the opening concert. No kidd, Yes, Demes and I
were in front of Carnegie Hall the night before with blankets,
a cot and a Thermas full of hot tea.

Speaker 16 (02:00:05):
That's what you did?

Speaker 19 (02:00:06):
Well?

Speaker 16 (02:00:06):
How was the concert magnific? Was it the opening?

Speaker 31 (02:00:10):
The opening?

Speaker 55 (02:00:10):
Their ceremonies were most impressive. They were the Mogolov Podolsky
Quintet crossbows. The entire audience stood at attention as Yasha
Hypert threw out the first piece of Rosen.

Speaker 6 (02:00:22):
Well.

Speaker 16 (02:00:22):
See, he threw out the first piece of rasin.

Speaker 55 (02:00:24):
Yes, and unfortunately it struck the second violinist and opened
an old rosen wound under his.

Speaker 16 (02:00:28):
Eyes, and he left the concert. No, he decided to
go on playing.

Speaker 55 (02:00:33):
The audience gave him a tremendous cheer as he trotted
back to his seat with the band aid, and he
kept playing yes until the third movement, when they took
him out and put in a pinch.

Speaker 16 (02:00:43):
Cellist, a pinch cell, and what's suspense? The spence yead girl.

Speaker 55 (02:00:49):
Even before the Mogulofodolsky Quintet started to play, the odds
had changed six times.

Speaker 6 (02:00:54):
Odds.

Speaker 16 (02:00:55):
What kind of bess could they make at a concert?
Well it was six to five.

Speaker 55 (02:00:58):
Someone's east ring would snap before the second movement.

Speaker 16 (02:01:03):
Yes, yes, yes, it.

Speaker 55 (02:01:04):
Was even money that Moglov would finish ahead of Podowski.

Speaker 19 (02:01:07):
Because, mister Gallup, how could you stand such excitement?

Speaker 32 (02:01:10):
Well?

Speaker 16 (02:01:10):
I couldn't, You couldn't.

Speaker 55 (02:01:11):
At one point I turned to Deans, I said, catch me, Deemed,
I do declare.

Speaker 16 (02:01:15):
I'm going to swoon deems tale. And what did he say?

Speaker 31 (02:01:18):
Nothing?

Speaker 16 (02:01:19):
He had already swooned. Mister Gallup.

Speaker 19 (02:01:22):
You know I could stand here and listen to you
for hours, and I feel as though I just did.
But let us turn attention to our subject tonight, mister
g ladies and gentlemen. When the Rodeo came here to
New York, it brought with it a breadth of the
Old West.

Speaker 16 (02:01:37):
So come along with me, won't you?

Speaker 19 (02:01:41):
Won't you come along as we turned back the pages
of history and salute the West, the Old West, golden
age of adventure. Where or where is the herby pioneer
who broke the trail to a new land. And where
pray tell is the buffalo who roamed the West.

Speaker 16 (02:02:04):
Garden.

Speaker 19 (02:02:06):
Where are the battered, old covered wagons that creaked and
bumped across the nation. They're still here for sale on
any used car line. So come along with me, won't you,
as we explore the West. Yes, only one hundred years

(02:02:29):
ago this was a prairie wilderness where at night all
you heard was wor From this desert wilderness. Men built
great cities, Los Angeles, Hollywood. We're at the world's famous
cross section, Hollywood and Vine. You now hear r, thank
you errow Flynn.

Speaker 16 (02:02:55):
But let us not. That wasn't a cord. That was
a whole bowl of wood there.

Speaker 32 (02:03:02):
That you do.

Speaker 16 (02:03:04):
Let us stop. It was a block of wood. Let
us not scoff, Paul, that's pretty good a woodblock. Let
us not.

Speaker 19 (02:03:14):
Let us not scoff at Hollywood, for it is Hollywood,
ladies and gentlemen, that has preserved the spirit of the
Old West in Western pictures. We are proud to present
us our guest this evening, one of Hollywood's great Western
movie stars, that two fisted writing, roping, and shooting hero
of the Planes, Newton Techs. Featherfield, Ladies and gentlemen, mister Featherfield.

Speaker 20 (02:03:37):
Featherfield, thank you, mister Beryl, thank you for giving me
this golden opportunity to thank my many fans who have
written me such heartwarming letters, filling me with confidence from
all over the United States.

Speaker 45 (02:03:57):
And parts of Canada.

Speaker 20 (02:04:00):
Mister Featherfield, excuse me, mister Burrel, you mind if I
sit down?

Speaker 45 (02:04:04):
I'm pooped.

Speaker 16 (02:04:09):
You're you're tired.

Speaker 20 (02:04:11):
I walked all away from my hotel.

Speaker 16 (02:04:13):
Oh that's just only a block from here, I know,
But the wind was against.

Speaker 20 (02:04:17):
Them up until the last few yards.

Speaker 16 (02:04:21):
It was nip and tuck.

Speaker 19 (02:04:22):
I see, mister Featherfield, every American's boy ambitionous to go
out western, become a cowboy.

Speaker 16 (02:04:26):
Tell us how did you get your start?

Speaker 45 (02:04:28):
I ran away from home?

Speaker 16 (02:04:30):
I see how old were you?

Speaker 45 (02:04:31):
Forty two?

Speaker 16 (02:04:36):
I see you wanted to get away from it all.

Speaker 20 (02:04:38):
I wanted to get away from my wife, and there
was plenty of it to get away from.

Speaker 45 (02:04:44):
Oh then you you have a wife, gruthom, isn't it?

Speaker 36 (02:04:51):
Yes?

Speaker 16 (02:04:51):
It is? And now your wife is with you text
in Hollywood making a home.

Speaker 20 (02:04:56):
Well, she's usually out of town. Professional woman. You know,
professional football is your wife, big mister Burrell. My wife
is the only football player in the country who can
go into a huddle single handedly.

Speaker 16 (02:05:12):
Well, let's hear more about you. Text. I was crazy
about your last picture.

Speaker 19 (02:05:15):
Of guns along the Guamas, the way you sang those
Western songs, mister Burl.

Speaker 45 (02:05:22):
Yes, yes, that wasn't my void, It wasn't That was
my double.

Speaker 19 (02:05:27):
Oh I see well, I sure enjoyed your breath taking
leaps over those cliffs.

Speaker 45 (02:05:30):
That was my double.

Speaker 16 (02:05:32):
But that chase you shooting from under the horse mind double? Gee.

Speaker 19 (02:05:36):
You must put in a strenuous day just sitting around
watching your double.

Speaker 20 (02:05:40):
Oh it's fatiguing, mister Burrel. I get home at night
and there's my wife waiting to greet me with a
big hug and kiss.

Speaker 16 (02:05:47):
See that's nice.

Speaker 45 (02:05:48):
Oh that double When I really need him, he's not there.

Speaker 16 (02:06:01):
Thank you very much, Thank you.

Speaker 19 (02:06:03):
Text Featherfield and give my regards to Gabby Hayes and
remember me to his wife.

Speaker 16 (02:06:07):
Helen ah.

Speaker 19 (02:06:10):
Ah, mister Gallup, I guess every young American has dreamed
of going out West in search of adventure and romance.
Way out West, when riding slowly into the sunset. With
that one and only girl at his side, he could sing,
am a hen a.

Speaker 31 (02:06:23):
Lad round, ludity light you you died.

Speaker 16 (02:06:30):
Bell for the last time, and ron.

Speaker 32 (02:06:42):
Ah.

Speaker 19 (02:06:42):
The Old West, Golden Memories of Cynthia, Cynthia in the
Old West, Cynthia, I knew at a glance that you
were from the West. You had a map of Texas
on your face. Your nose was a panhandle, Cynthia, girl
of the Golden West. Nobody understood you, Cynthia. They used
to think of you as a cow girl.

Speaker 16 (02:07:00):
Not me.

Speaker 19 (02:07:01):
I always thought of you as a girl cow. Wonderful Cynthia.
How proud I was of you when you came to
New York with the rodeo. Rodeo Rede, when you came
to New York with the rodeo, when you rode in,
and how those people in Madison Square Gardens stood and cheered.
They all remembered you from the last time you fought

(02:07:22):
Rocky Graziano. If you hadn't fouled them, you'd still be
in the ring. How brave you are, my Cynthia. You
would pray, remember that time we were walking in the
canyon and that rattlesnake bit you how horrible it was
watching that.

Speaker 16 (02:07:39):
Snake slowly curl up and die. But it was the.

Speaker 19 (02:07:45):
Little things I remember about your, Cynthia, your tinkling little laugh,
the time I missed the calf and I branded you instead. Clean,
that clean that would come into your eye whenever there
was a full moon, and then you'd go out and
they add it.

Speaker 16 (02:08:03):
I remember your favorite trick with horses, Cynthia. I remember
that favorite trick, stealing them.

Speaker 19 (02:08:08):
Yes, Cynthia, I'd always treasure that last beautiful picture you
riding off into the sunset with a posse behind you.

Speaker 16 (02:08:15):
So until you get out, not bring it up. Don applaud,
I'll be back.

Speaker 70 (02:08:37):
Chicago, New Orleans, Minneapolis, San Francisco, Philadelphia. From all over
the country, there's news, big news. Listen from section after section.

Speaker 55 (02:08:46):
Eminent nose and throat specialists report that the cigarette they
suggest in cases of irritation you're smoking.

Speaker 16 (02:08:51):
Is Philip Morris.

Speaker 70 (02:08:53):
Yes, these top ranking nose and throats specialists actually suggest
Philip Morris because they know Philip Morris is the one
the only leading cigarette proved definitely less irritating.

Speaker 55 (02:09:04):
Remember, the cigarette that gives you the least irritation is
the cigarette that gives you the most enjoyment. After all,
it's pleasure, deep rich pleasure that counts in smoking. And
the full measure of smoking pleasure is yours to enjoy
day in, day out, in Philip Morris. That's why we say,
if every smoker knew what Philip Morris smokers know, they'd

(02:09:24):
all changed to Philip Morris America's finest cigarette.

Speaker 16 (02:09:41):
Thank you, And now I can cut you off if
I want to. You know, I remember that last card
you gave me.

Speaker 6 (02:09:50):
That was.

Speaker 16 (02:09:55):
That wasn't a lost card. You're still searching for it,
Ladies and gentlemen.

Speaker 19 (02:09:59):
That was Rayel and his red silk stockings orchestra playing No,
that's backwards. That was. That was wonderful. Ray There's nothing
like a good tune played by a good band. There's
cycling nothing like it on this program. I'm only kidding.
Ray It was not only good, it was mediocre. And now,
as we continue our salute to the West, we present.

Speaker 55 (02:10:22):
Western Porum Tonight, Western Porum Tonight, the question if there
is another gold rush in the West, we'll Ernest Bevin
get there first.

Speaker 16 (02:10:34):
Thank you, mister Gallup. You're gaining. Now let's have some
questions from the floor.

Speaker 19 (02:10:38):
Let's start with this tall gentleman here wiping the lipstick
off his nose.

Speaker 16 (02:10:42):
Step up, sir, yes, sir, mister earl, I bring you
greetings from a group of fans on the Pacific coast.
Thank you.

Speaker 31 (02:10:48):
We sure we should come out there and spend all
your time with us.

Speaker 16 (02:10:51):
Well, thank you again. And where are you from? Alcatraz?
Thank you? I'll let us go on, all right. This
young man with the silver around his neck, young man,
what is your name?

Speaker 35 (02:11:02):
My name is Prince Elizabeth, Prince, Prince Elizabeth.

Speaker 3 (02:11:08):
Yeah, it's Prince that you shouldn't confuse me with Princess Elizabeth.

Speaker 16 (02:11:12):
Oh, I see, I won't, I won't.

Speaker 4 (02:11:13):
We're very much alike.

Speaker 34 (02:11:14):
She refuses to wear long skirts, and so do I.

Speaker 16 (02:11:17):
I see, I understand.

Speaker 3 (02:11:20):
I like when everybody calls me prince. It's better than
the name I had before.

Speaker 16 (02:11:24):
What was your name before? Rover?

Speaker 19 (02:11:28):
All right, a prince, you have a question concerning the west?

Speaker 52 (02:11:31):
The West?

Speaker 3 (02:11:32):
Why should I have a question about the West? What
you make it sound like there's something wrong with the wedding.
What are you trying to do stir up a civil
war between the East and the West. You want to
see bloodshed just because you ain't California. California gave a
sucker Starges and Jay Russell, I refuse.

Speaker 46 (02:11:46):
To fight California.

Speaker 9 (02:11:47):
California gave us the double picture Cukobaga the spot, but
I refused.

Speaker 16 (02:11:51):
To fight California. California came a suck.

Speaker 19 (02:11:53):
A thousand night overtight of the top bread waiter over
your jail, Gilbert, But I won't fight California. Please, I'll please,
let's not try to lose our heads now, young man,
if you have a question, let's hear it.

Speaker 1 (02:12:12):
Okay, would you like to see where I was vaccinated?

Speaker 20 (02:12:18):
Please?

Speaker 16 (02:12:19):
Let's not do't please, let's hear from the fair Sex.

Speaker 19 (02:12:21):
This young lady in the aisle pickling the pigs feed,
young lady, what is your name?

Speaker 4 (02:12:25):
Please tell lit la FENI I'm a homemaker.

Speaker 16 (02:12:27):
I see. And you have a question that has to
do with the West.

Speaker 4 (02:12:31):
Yeah, how can I stop my husband from being such
a Western movie fan? He's all the time on a horse.

Speaker 16 (02:12:35):
He's a horseman.

Speaker 4 (02:12:36):
He got no saddle, so he has to ride bare back.
Got to be the callouses. I your husband, I'm a horse.
Oh what a broken down old nag.

Speaker 16 (02:12:46):
The horse my husband. Oh, I get it.

Speaker 4 (02:12:49):
He bought the horse for my brewery.

Speaker 16 (02:12:51):
A brewery horse.

Speaker 4 (02:12:52):
What trouble? He won't eat nothing less he got a
head on it.

Speaker 16 (02:12:57):
Does your husband ride the horse around the neighborhood?

Speaker 6 (02:12:59):
Yeah?

Speaker 4 (02:13:00):
Averything neighbors is always looking up and yelling, Hey, Phoenny,
your share looks well.

Speaker 35 (02:13:03):
On that horse.

Speaker 16 (02:13:04):
What's so embarrassing about that?

Speaker 4 (02:13:06):
Half the time he ain't eating on it?

Speaker 16 (02:13:09):
Well, no wonder.

Speaker 4 (02:13:10):
He can't afford a stable, so he got the horse
sleeping with us.

Speaker 16 (02:13:13):
Who wait at missus Pheenie, the horse leaves in your bed.

Speaker 4 (02:13:16):
It's awful. My husband's uping until four in the morning
getting the horse ready for bed.

Speaker 16 (02:13:21):
It takes that long.

Speaker 4 (02:13:22):
He takes his shoes off.

Speaker 16 (02:13:25):
Wait a minute, you.

Speaker 19 (02:13:26):
Take the horse's shoes off before he gets into the bed.

Speaker 4 (02:13:28):
Sure, what do you think we are slobs or something?

Speaker 16 (02:13:35):
Well, that's very neat.

Speaker 4 (02:13:36):
He's so crazy about cowboys. You got a job at
the rodeo.

Speaker 16 (02:13:39):
He doesn't act with his horse.

Speaker 35 (02:13:40):
Now with a broom, Thank you very much, missus Phoebe.

Speaker 19 (02:13:49):
And now is a fitting conclusion to our forum on
the Old West. Let us pay special tribune to that
grand old city of fun and recreation as we all
join in and seeing.

Speaker 30 (02:14:00):
You.

Speaker 16 (02:14:00):
Wish I was in the town of Reno shooting craps
and play in Keno.

Speaker 24 (02:14:06):
Away look Away, Reno Land.

Speaker 4 (02:14:09):
You can't play anything fun penny Yankee, but your shirt
to lose your penny.

Speaker 16 (02:14:14):
Look Away, look Away, look Away. So I wish I
was in Reno.

Speaker 46 (02:14:21):
Hooray, hooray, I've been near off what he somewhere gone?

Speaker 19 (02:14:27):
Move to Reno ah way away, Oh way, horang ahway
west and Rena away away alway away?

Speaker 16 (02:14:38):
Where in re away?

Speaker 19 (02:14:55):
Now, ladies and gentlemen, Here he is our young singing
star Dick Connie to sing, Oh.

Speaker 32 (02:15:00):
All of me? Why not take on.

Speaker 6 (02:15:06):
Of me?

Speaker 16 (02:15:09):
Can you see.

Speaker 32 (02:15:13):
I'm no good with all.

Speaker 16 (02:15:16):
You?

Speaker 32 (02:15:19):
Take my lips I want to love, Take my arm
I'll never do. You're goodbye?

Speaker 1 (02:15:42):
Laughing me with all.

Speaker 32 (02:15:45):
That try? How can I.

Speaker 16 (02:15:51):
Go one?

Speaker 14 (02:15:52):
Dear?

Speaker 32 (02:15:53):
With all you you took a Oh that one was
my heart? So one not take all.

Speaker 30 (02:16:12):
Of me?

Speaker 45 (02:16:21):
All of me?

Speaker 54 (02:16:23):
Why not take all me? Can't you see I'm not
good with u? You take my lip I want to
lose them. Take my arm I'll never use.

Speaker 30 (02:16:42):
Then your goodbye left me with eyes that cry? How
can I go one day with all you? You took
a paw that one was my.

Speaker 19 (02:17:01):
So why not.

Speaker 16 (02:17:04):
Hey call me up? Great?

Speaker 19 (02:17:21):
Ah, the lip wonderful, Dick wonderful, and and and the
way ray blocker and as orchestra coming to you. They
deserve a great big hand. And you know where, you
know where I have to do it. Mister You're mad, you.

Speaker 6 (02:17:37):
And that Cort.

Speaker 16 (02:17:40):
Ladies. You know, mister Gallup.

Speaker 19 (02:17:41):
You know, to people in show business, the West means
only one thing, and that's Hollywood.

Speaker 55 (02:17:46):
And you're going to tell us about an experience you
had out Western Hollywood. No, oh, I'm sorry.

Speaker 16 (02:17:51):
Watch that.

Speaker 19 (02:17:52):
Well, here's what happened to me out Western Hollywood. It
was a few years ago, just after I had closed
in the zigfol Follies. Mister Dow, head of the twentieth
century Fox Picture, was in New York and he signed
me to a contract. What a day from me, Mister
Sannick seems so happy. Why in six months, I'll make

(02:18:15):
you the biggest star in Hollywood.

Speaker 16 (02:18:17):
Gee, thank you, mister Sannak.

Speaker 19 (02:18:19):
I've had my eye on you for years. What challenge,
what personality? I'll make your name a household word? Gosh,
mister Zannick and another thing. H what was your name again?
It Burrel? Milton Burl. That'll have to be changed. People
will confuse you with that corny comic that's around. But
mister Zanni, when we get to Hollywood, before anything else,

(02:18:41):
drop into my office.

Speaker 16 (02:18:42):
And say hello.

Speaker 19 (02:18:43):
Oh, yes, before anything else, I'll drop into your office
and say hello, Gosh, my big break. Here's the office,
Darryl you Zannick d u z does? I guess he
does everything. I'll just drop in and say hello. Pardon, miss,

(02:19:05):
Will you tell mister Zannic that Milton Burro was here?

Speaker 45 (02:19:07):
What was the name?

Speaker 4 (02:19:08):
Please?

Speaker 16 (02:19:09):
A Burrow, Milton Burrough. I just dropped in to say hello.

Speaker 56 (02:19:11):
Oh, mister burd. Mister Zannik is very eager to see you,
but he's too busy to be disturbed.

Speaker 16 (02:19:16):
Have a seat, yes, ma'am, I'm going to be in pictures.
I'm beautiful to see.

Speaker 19 (02:19:23):
Look, miss, I'm supposed to start on a picture, but
first mister Zanik wanted me to drop in and say hello.

Speaker 16 (02:19:29):
So if you'll just.

Speaker 4 (02:19:29):
When mister Zanak is busy, nobody can see him.

Speaker 16 (02:19:32):
I understand.

Speaker 32 (02:19:33):
I'll wait.

Speaker 16 (02:19:34):
I'm going to be in pictures.

Speaker 35 (02:19:37):
Maybe can I see mister Danik.

Speaker 16 (02:19:39):
Get this guy he wants to see.

Speaker 35 (02:19:40):
Mister Zannik, I'm stuck on a word on his crossword puzzle.
Maybe he can help me.

Speaker 56 (02:19:45):
I'll see Marvin. Marvin with a crossword puzzle. Mister Zanick,
go right in.

Speaker 16 (02:19:55):
Look.

Speaker 27 (02:19:55):
Miss.

Speaker 16 (02:19:55):
All I want to do is to say hello.

Speaker 56 (02:19:57):
Mister Zanak, cannot be disturbed. Please be seated, okay, I
want to be.

Speaker 16 (02:20:02):
Excod to me. I'm with the cook in the studio
lunch room. I want to know should we give it
two correcers with the soup or three? This? I got
a seat the cook.

Speaker 4 (02:20:13):
Mister Zannak, go right in.

Speaker 19 (02:20:18):
I saw it, Miss. I just want to say hello.
Will you let me yell it over the transom?

Speaker 16 (02:20:23):
Clean?

Speaker 4 (02:20:24):
Mister Zanak, cannot be disturbed, Have a seat, yes, ma'am.

Speaker 16 (02:20:31):
Who is this guy? Pardon me, ma'am.

Speaker 43 (02:20:33):
I happen to have here a little potato peela that
not only peels, scrapes and scratches, when it also leaves
the potato clean.

Speaker 35 (02:20:40):
And smooth as a baby's cheek.

Speaker 56 (02:20:42):
Now this little gad a moment, sir, A man selling
potato peelers. Mister Zannak, go right in, look.

Speaker 16 (02:20:55):
Miss, I just want to say hello, sir.

Speaker 56 (02:20:57):
Be patient, Yes, ma'am. One moment's thunderhead. Thunderhead, mister Zannix,
go ride in?

Speaker 19 (02:21:13):
Oh no, now look miss A guy with a cross
white puzzle gets in? A guy selling potato peel is
a horse? Will you please tell mister Sannak. Then I'm
waiting out here just to say hello. What was the
name to Elmo Lincoln? A poo abe pool?

Speaker 56 (02:21:30):
I just want to say hello, missus Dannak can see
no one? Please be seated, Okay, go ride in, Lassie.

Speaker 19 (02:21:43):
Oh no, no, look, miss, I just want to say hello.
Let me whisper through the keyhole.

Speaker 4 (02:21:47):
Come back tomorrow.

Speaker 16 (02:21:55):
I'll never get in a picture. Good morning, miss. I
just dropped in to see mister z say hello.

Speaker 4 (02:22:01):
What was the name sir?

Speaker 16 (02:22:04):
Harry Truman?

Speaker 4 (02:22:07):
Sorry, mister Truman, We're not doing any musicals this year.

Speaker 19 (02:22:13):
Wait please, wait a minute, No you don't. I'm burrow
every day for a week. I've been coming here to
say hello.

Speaker 4 (02:22:19):
I told you, misters Annik. Hasn't the time?

Speaker 16 (02:22:21):
Well, I'll cut it short. I'll just say hip, just hip.

Speaker 4 (02:22:25):
Have you an appointment?

Speaker 16 (02:22:26):
I had one a week ago.

Speaker 4 (02:22:27):
You're late? Come back tomorrow tomorrow.

Speaker 16 (02:22:37):
Good morning, Mabel, Good morning, milty, Mabel.

Speaker 19 (02:22:40):
I got to thinking, you know, I've spent six whole
months sitting on that second.

Speaker 16 (02:22:43):
Chair from the inn.

Speaker 4 (02:22:44):
Anything wrong with the chair?

Speaker 19 (02:22:46):
No, it's shaping up nicely, Mabel. I came here so
a you wan to look at me? Now, I'm another
Sea Aubrey Smith. Just let me see mister Zanick and
say hello.

Speaker 4 (02:22:54):
Please, here comes mister Zannik's assistant.

Speaker 16 (02:22:56):
Oh, mister banister, yes, yes, I just want to see
mister Zannak. Oh, you just want to see mister Santak.
I just want to say hello. Sixteen scenes in Forever
Amber have just been censored. I just want to say hello.

Speaker 31 (02:23:06):
Popcorn machines and four of our theaters blew.

Speaker 16 (02:23:08):
Up last night. I just want to say hello.

Speaker 31 (02:23:10):
Studio is facing a crisis, and you want to say hello.

Speaker 16 (02:23:13):
I can't let Daryl Zannick down, step aside. I'll go
in and cheer him up.

Speaker 19 (02:23:17):
Have you an appointment? Well, come back tomorrow. No, no, now,
let me see mister Sanic. Let me see a picture
of mister Santak. I just want to say hello. That's all.

Speaker 31 (02:23:29):
Heavens, mister Santik is coming out of his office.

Speaker 16 (02:23:32):
Ten shun Burl. Hello, where have you been for the
last six months? Hello?

Speaker 31 (02:23:38):
I have had a dragnet out across the country.

Speaker 16 (02:23:40):
Looking for you. Hello. I told you in New York
to come in and see me. What happened?

Speaker 6 (02:23:43):
Hello?

Speaker 16 (02:23:44):
Three pictures we had already to go.

Speaker 31 (02:23:46):
In, No, Burl, Hello, your contact expired today.

Speaker 16 (02:23:49):
The whole thing's off. Come bye. Of course, is the
park for you in a new picture? Hello, But since
you've shown.

Speaker 19 (02:23:57):
Yourself to be so undependable, we can't check in another chance.

Speaker 16 (02:24:01):
On second part, Hello, I have a colossal idea. Hello.

Speaker 19 (02:24:05):
Hello, I'm going to be in the York next week,
dropping to my office there and say hello.

Speaker 16 (02:24:10):
No, no, iank, you were a little late. I'll say
good night. And in the meantime, remember this.

Speaker 70 (02:24:22):
You're twice as sure of twice the pleasure when you smoke,
Philip Morris.

Speaker 16 (02:24:26):
And here's why.

Speaker 55 (02:24:27):
First you enjoy the pleasure of smoking the world's finest
premium tobaccos, mellow and mild and superbly blended. And second,
you enjoy the extra pleasure of smoking the one the
only leading cigarette recognized by eminent nose and throat specialists
as definitely less irritating.

Speaker 70 (02:24:42):
Yes, you're twice as sure of twice the pleasure when
you smoke Philip Morris. So next time you call for cigarettes,
call for Philip Morris, made in America, buy Americans to
please American tastes.

Speaker 50 (02:24:55):
This st Johnny again.

Speaker 5 (02:24:56):
Returning now to the thousands of star windows and towers
Alon America.

Speaker 32 (02:25:00):
Look for me.

Speaker 50 (02:25:01):
I'll be waiting for you.

Speaker 16 (02:25:03):
Come in and.

Speaker 30 (02:25:05):
Philip.

Speaker 55 (02:25:09):
Yes, I've ever very smoker. You had Philip Morris smokers.
Now they'd all changed to Philip Morris. America's fine. Let's
take a route an Alcoby Johnny.

Speaker 7 (02:25:21):
Uh Milton Burle classic Burrel from seventy eight years ago
October seventh, nineteen forty seven. Visit our webpage Classic Radio
Dot stream and let's go check in on Claudia. Oh
but first I need to tell you about this.

Speaker 71 (02:25:42):
This is Peter Hallas, as senior editor of the Hungarian
Desk Radio Free Europe. I write and edit materia this
thing for an audience still leaving behind barbed wire. I
know those people, for I was one of them. I
escaped to freedom in nineteen fifty six, but there are.

Speaker 58 (02:26:04):
Millions still in captivity.

Speaker 71 (02:26:07):
Radio Free Europe keeps them in touch with the world outside.
Keep RFE on the air with contributions to Crusade for Freedom.

Speaker 7 (02:26:17):
Now let's see what's going on with David and Claudia.
This episode goes back seventy eight years to October seventh,
nineteen forty seven.

Speaker 72 (02:26:27):
Your Coca Cola Butler presents Flordia Cloria, based on the

(02:26:55):
original stories by Rose Franken Ratio, transcribed Friday by your
friendly neighbor who bottles Coca Cola. Relax and while you're listening,
refresh yourself, have a coke. And now, Claudia, anything more

(02:27:37):
for me to do around the house.

Speaker 40 (02:27:39):
I fix the toaster, the door buzzer, the carpet sweeper,
and the bathroom not David, Are you sure that's all cool?

Speaker 26 (02:27:46):
Absolutely?

Speaker 73 (02:27:47):
Say what's got into you tonight?

Speaker 32 (02:27:48):
David?

Speaker 58 (02:27:50):
Nothing? I just feel like fixing things.

Speaker 73 (02:27:52):
Well, I think it's feeling like fixing things is an
awful like fiddling while Rome burns.

Speaker 26 (02:27:56):
I am not sure I like it. David.

Speaker 58 (02:27:58):
You know you're cute. When you get.

Speaker 46 (02:28:00):
Serious, you're whistling off key.

Speaker 5 (02:28:04):
David.

Speaker 58 (02:28:05):
I suppose you think you can whistle better than that.

Speaker 26 (02:28:07):
I certainly can. You don't know how to whistle, Claudia,
never could.

Speaker 73 (02:28:10):
I've been practicing, mama.

Speaker 40 (02:28:12):
All right, smarty, let's see you. You mean hear me,
don't quibble, just whistling.

Speaker 16 (02:28:15):
All right.

Speaker 26 (02:28:16):
But you can't look at me.

Speaker 73 (02:28:17):
Please don't look at me while I'm whistling, David.

Speaker 26 (02:28:19):
It makes me laugh.

Speaker 40 (02:28:20):
It's very temperamentally an artist's mother.

Speaker 58 (02:28:23):
I'll turn my back. Go ahead, now.

Speaker 26 (02:28:25):
How can you turn your back when you're sitting down?

Speaker 58 (02:28:27):
All right, I'll turn my head then, go ahead.

Speaker 26 (02:28:29):
Here I go, David, that's not fair. You're looking at
me in the mirror.

Speaker 58 (02:28:38):
You look like a fish.

Speaker 26 (02:28:39):
Thank you. You're not a very accomplished whistler. They can't
do it when anyone's looking at you.

Speaker 73 (02:28:43):
I'm as good as David is.

Speaker 26 (02:28:44):
Who says, I said side you look like a fish too.

Speaker 40 (02:28:47):
Insults will help, dol like everyone knows that whistling isn't
a woman's word.

Speaker 26 (02:28:51):
I am not like other women.

Speaker 73 (02:28:53):
I told you, I can only not when you're looking
at me.

Speaker 45 (02:28:57):
Hey, I know what I'll do.

Speaker 73 (02:28:58):
What now, I'll go into the next You'll be able
to hear me from there.

Speaker 26 (02:29:01):
I've got a better idea. Why don't you both go
into the next room and let David's poor old mother
and aw go to sleep. Now, I'm a hard couch.
That's her bed.

Speaker 73 (02:29:09):
I thought you always like that hard old couch better
than your nice soft bed.

Speaker 58 (02:29:13):
Don't you know that mother in laws are always looking
for sympathy?

Speaker 26 (02:29:17):
Chance I have getting sympathy from you.

Speaker 73 (02:29:18):
Besides, come Friday, when we move, you'll have your bed
back and.

Speaker 1 (02:29:21):
You'll be sorry.

Speaker 26 (02:29:21):
I repeat, I am tired. I don't care what you do,
but please take your nonsensical chatter out of the living room.
Good night.

Speaker 73 (02:29:28):
I think she means it, David.

Speaker 58 (02:29:30):
Could be wait. I gather up my stuff, my pipe.

Speaker 73 (02:29:33):
Don't forget the matches. Like last night, you nearly scared
Mama to death.

Speaker 26 (02:29:36):
I don't scare the dead that easily.

Speaker 73 (02:29:37):
In the evening papers, you read them at least eight times.

Speaker 58 (02:29:40):
I haven't finished, do you mind?

Speaker 26 (02:29:42):
Oh what's so interesting in them? Anyway?

Speaker 58 (02:29:44):
Read them sometimes?

Speaker 73 (02:29:45):
See haven't got time. But David, when you get to
the lady's page, tear out the recipe?

Speaker 58 (02:29:50):
Will you turn it out?

Speaker 26 (02:29:51):
I don't care who tears it out, but please get
yourself going.

Speaker 73 (02:29:54):
I think she still means it, David.

Speaker 40 (02:29:56):
We're going, mother, sleep tight, sleep time.

Speaker 58 (02:29:59):
David, I've got my tell him in the bedroom.

Speaker 7 (02:30:01):
No, no, I'll tell you here.

Speaker 26 (02:30:02):
Make it quick, Claudia, I'd like to go for a walk.

Speaker 58 (02:30:05):
You would, eh m?

Speaker 73 (02:30:06):
I would a nice long walk. It's a lovely night out.

Speaker 40 (02:30:09):
You know that's not a bad idea. I think I'd
like to take a walk.

Speaker 26 (02:30:12):
Wonderful. I'm already. When you come back, try if it's
at all possible, not to awaken me.

Speaker 73 (02:30:17):
She's ferocious when she's awakened at night.

Speaker 26 (02:30:19):
I snap like a dog, like a black bear. Now
clear out of here, both of you.

Speaker 58 (02:30:25):
I gotta put on a tie. I'll be right with you.

Speaker 73 (02:30:28):
But he doesn't really whistle badly at all?

Speaker 5 (02:30:30):
Does he?

Speaker 26 (02:30:31):
Mama better than you? I think so too. David seems
to be in fine spirs tonight, doesn't.

Speaker 73 (02:30:37):
He certainly kept busy fixing things and whistling.

Speaker 26 (02:30:40):
Never saw him fix her whistle so much before.

Speaker 45 (02:30:43):
It's funny.

Speaker 73 (02:30:44):
I never thought David would be the kind of man
who likes.

Speaker 26 (02:30:46):
To fix things. They all do at times.

Speaker 16 (02:30:49):
Who does what?

Speaker 58 (02:30:50):
At which time?

Speaker 26 (02:30:51):
I was afraid of that?

Speaker 16 (02:30:52):
Of what?

Speaker 26 (02:30:53):
You're contagious, Claudia, What do you mean?

Speaker 16 (02:30:56):
Now?

Speaker 26 (02:30:56):
David comes into a room asking questions questions.

Speaker 40 (02:30:59):
Question. Your mother is in a terrible mood, darling. Come on,
let's leave her with herself.

Speaker 26 (02:31:03):
Hand me my jacket, David, here you are. Don't get lost.

Speaker 6 (02:31:07):
We won't.

Speaker 26 (02:31:07):
But if you do, remember your name is sewn at
the seam of your dress, right next to the zippa.
Go to a police station and tell them who you are.
They'll bring you back, all right, silly, don't.

Speaker 51 (02:31:16):
Wait up for it.

Speaker 16 (02:31:17):
Don't worry.

Speaker 24 (02:31:18):
I'm asleep already night.

Speaker 73 (02:31:25):
She does look a little tired, don't you think, David.

Speaker 58 (02:31:27):
Well, she'll get more rest in a couple of days.
When we move out.

Speaker 73 (02:31:31):
She'll be lonesome too.

Speaker 58 (02:31:32):
Mother doesn't mind.

Speaker 40 (02:31:34):
Besides, we won't let her get lonesome.

Speaker 73 (02:31:37):
I wouldn't want to live alone, would you, David.

Speaker 40 (02:31:39):
We're not your mother, Darling. At her age, living alone
is not so bad, I guess. Besides, she's an independent soul.

Speaker 58 (02:31:46):
She'll enjoy it. You wait and see.

Speaker 73 (02:31:48):
She wouldn't tell us if she didn't, No, but we.

Speaker 58 (02:31:50):
Could tell you think so, I know? So go on
out where we walk?

Speaker 22 (02:31:55):
Oh?

Speaker 58 (02:31:56):
Out now into the elevator with you.

Speaker 26 (02:32:01):
What floor, my lady, now, what kind of floors have
you got?

Speaker 16 (02:32:04):
Let's see?

Speaker 40 (02:32:04):
High floors, low floors, meeting floors, wax floors, dance floors.

Speaker 45 (02:32:08):
Like to go dancing?

Speaker 58 (02:32:09):
Right now, I think we'll take the main floor.

Speaker 6 (02:32:14):
Down, down, down somehow.

Speaker 73 (02:32:16):
I never trust these kinds of elevators that go by themselves.

Speaker 45 (02:32:20):
I always think.

Speaker 60 (02:32:20):
They're gonna get stopped.

Speaker 58 (02:32:21):
They never do, really, never, very rarely.

Speaker 73 (02:32:25):
Well, I still don't trust them. I just don't see
how they can.

Speaker 26 (02:32:28):
Run by themselves.

Speaker 58 (02:32:29):
Mmm, that's the way they're made.

Speaker 26 (02:32:30):
They stop, they.

Speaker 73 (02:32:31):
Start, the doors open, one thing after another, just like
so that's just what I mean. I press one button,
stops on the first floor.

Speaker 58 (02:32:41):
Well where did you wanted to stop on.

Speaker 26 (02:32:43):
The first floor? Of course?

Speaker 22 (02:32:44):
Oh?

Speaker 73 (02:32:44):
But why should it?

Speaker 45 (02:32:46):
Because see, even you don't know.

Speaker 40 (02:32:49):
Of course I know then why there's a little man
who sits on top of the car, and when you
press the button that says one, that's where he takes you.

Speaker 26 (02:32:58):
I don't believe it.

Speaker 50 (02:32:59):
There is no man.

Speaker 26 (02:33:02):
You're right, my dear, Then how does it know?

Speaker 58 (02:33:04):
Because you pressed the button? That's all you'll understand. So
forget it it?

Speaker 73 (02:33:08):
Maybe all I'll understand, but I won't forget it.

Speaker 58 (02:33:11):
Yeah, Now be careful of that revolving door.

Speaker 26 (02:33:13):
Come in the same compartment with me.

Speaker 58 (02:33:15):
You scared to go by yourself?

Speaker 15 (02:33:16):
Terrified?

Speaker 58 (02:33:22):
Mm, nice night, isn't it?

Speaker 26 (02:33:26):
Little damp?

Speaker 31 (02:33:27):
But nice?

Speaker 58 (02:33:28):
Smart of you to suggest a walk.

Speaker 32 (02:33:30):
Claudia.

Speaker 73 (02:33:30):
Oh, I'm a very smart girl, didn't you know?

Speaker 58 (02:33:32):
I keep forgetting Uh, it feels good to get out
and walk.

Speaker 26 (02:33:36):
David, now that we're awaiting the house, tell me what's wrong?

Speaker 58 (02:33:40):
What's wrong? What do you mean?

Speaker 26 (02:33:42):
I d I know something's wrong? It was daving, I did.

Speaker 58 (02:33:46):
I you were a dope. What could you do wrong?

Speaker 67 (02:33:48):
Lots of things?

Speaker 58 (02:33:49):
Well, you didn't do any of those lots of things tonight?

Speaker 16 (02:33:52):
There?

Speaker 54 (02:33:52):
And what is it?

Speaker 32 (02:33:53):
David?

Speaker 40 (02:33:57):
Look at the ring around the moon, Claudia. It's ought
to be a nice day tomorrow.

Speaker 26 (02:34:01):
Is that what it means?

Speaker 58 (02:34:03):
I think?

Speaker 32 (02:34:03):
So?

Speaker 73 (02:34:04):
What makes the ring?

Speaker 22 (02:34:05):
David?

Speaker 58 (02:34:07):
Dampness and the atmosphere?

Speaker 73 (02:34:08):
I guess I like it almost as much as a
clear moon, sort of mysterious, like.

Speaker 58 (02:34:14):
The elevator that runs by itself.

Speaker 45 (02:34:16):
It's not that mysterious, you know.

Speaker 40 (02:34:23):
I'd rather be an architect than anything else in the world,
I think.

Speaker 73 (02:34:28):
I said, And I was wondered, if I were a man,
what I'd like to have been being an architect?

Speaker 58 (02:34:32):
Would have been nice.

Speaker 73 (02:34:33):
I think building things out of nothing, houses for people, schools. David,
do you always want to be an architect.

Speaker 58 (02:34:44):
Not or a farmer, but rather an architect.

Speaker 73 (02:34:47):
We're lucky you're doing what you like to do.

Speaker 58 (02:34:50):
You bet, we are.

Speaker 40 (02:34:52):
I like the officer, like working with Roger. But still
sometimes I feel as though I'm not quite going in.

Speaker 58 (02:34:59):
The right direction, like tonight, like tonight.

Speaker 26 (02:35:03):
Have you felt like this.

Speaker 58 (02:35:04):
Before, David, I guess so, but I can't quite put
my finger on it.

Speaker 73 (02:35:09):
That's only because you don't have to.

Speaker 40 (02:35:12):
I I don't even know exactly what it is I
wanna build. It's a feeling inside me. It's mostly that
I well, I feel as though I I wanna do
something big, leave something, something beautiful in the world.

Speaker 58 (02:35:32):
I'm sorry, Darling. I don't suppose I'm making much sense.

Speaker 26 (02:35:36):
It's enough sense for me, David.

Speaker 40 (02:35:39):
Oh, I look at the ring around the moon.

Speaker 45 (02:35:42):
It's sort of pinkish.

Speaker 50 (02:35:43):
Hm.

Speaker 40 (02:35:44):
Right behind the tallest spar of that cathedral across the street.

Speaker 58 (02:35:48):
It's almost pierced.

Speaker 26 (02:35:49):
By it, kind of like a sign, isn't it almost?

Speaker 58 (02:35:54):
I wonder how we happen to walk here?

Speaker 40 (02:35:57):
I wonder do you believe in signs, Claudia, Oh, depends
on whether you like a particular sign or not.

Speaker 36 (02:36:04):
Is that it?

Speaker 26 (02:36:05):
I like this one?

Speaker 40 (02:36:09):
David?

Speaker 53 (02:36:10):
Do you believe in signs?

Speaker 6 (02:36:12):
Mm?

Speaker 58 (02:36:13):
No, not usually. Come on, let's go in.

Speaker 26 (02:36:25):
It's peaceful in here, isn't it, David?

Speaker 58 (02:36:29):
Peaceful quiet?

Speaker 73 (02:36:32):
It's almost like getting married.

Speaker 58 (02:36:35):
Claudia.

Speaker 40 (02:36:36):
Uh. Do you see the way the stone sweeps up.
It's a good, clean line, isn't it. The man who
built this said, I'm building a house, a meeting place,
a place where people can come.

Speaker 58 (02:36:51):
And meet their God.

Speaker 36 (02:36:53):
It it's big, but not frightening.

Speaker 40 (02:36:56):
They know he's here whenever they come. Look around your Claudia,
it's in all these storms, you know. I think I
understand something a little better now. Yes, David, I'm I'm
moving in the right direction. I'll build a great church someday,

(02:37:22):
but not yet. I look around and I can see,
but I'm not ready, Claudia. Technically I could. I could
build a place like this. I know how a flying
buttress should be constructed. I I know how the walls
must be balanced for the high ceiling. The building would stand.

(02:37:44):
It would be good as buildings go.

Speaker 26 (02:37:48):
But that isn't enough.

Speaker 58 (02:37:50):
No, No, it's not half enough. Maybe in a few years, David,
maybe when you've both suffered a little.

Speaker 40 (02:38:03):
We're too happy now, and life is in all happiness?

Speaker 26 (02:38:07):
Can it be.

Speaker 58 (02:38:10):
Happiness?

Speaker 40 (02:38:12):
Tears, joy and sorrow, respect, love, humility, all of those things.

Speaker 58 (02:38:22):
When I know more of them, I'll be.

Speaker 20 (02:38:25):
Ready, David.

Speaker 73 (02:38:28):
Isn't there a way of building a cathedral without tears?

Speaker 58 (02:38:33):
I'm afraid not, Claudia, David.

Speaker 38 (02:38:38):
Let's leave.

Speaker 73 (02:38:38):
I feel almost as if someone's trying to take you
away from me?

Speaker 26 (02:38:44):
Are we too happy?

Speaker 40 (02:38:47):
If happiness is loving someone and being loved, we.

Speaker 58 (02:38:53):
Are very happy.

Speaker 73 (02:38:57):
I hope it'll stay that way, David, Always happy, always
in love, for ever ever.

Speaker 72 (02:39:24):
The story material used on this broadcast was under the
supervision of Rose Franken and William Brown Maloney, creators of Claudia.
There's enough Coca cola so you can stock up. Now

(02:39:45):
your family and friends can enjoy the pause that refreshes
much more often. Coke is delicious, refreshing, easy on the budget,
and welcome in any gathering. Now you can say, have
a coke again when folks in the call, And once
again you can count on coke to make any occasion
a party. You can ask your grocer for coca cola

(02:40:08):
when you're doing your marketing, and you'll get it. Don't
forget to bring home a supply for your refrigerator when
you shop every day Monday through Friday. Claudia comes to you,
transcribed with the best wishes of your friendly neighbor who
bottles coca cola. So listen again tomorrow at the same time.

(02:40:31):
And now this is Joe King saying au revoir. And remember,
whoever you are, whatever you do, wherever you may be.
When you think of refreshment, think of coca cola or
ice cold. Coca Cola makes any pause the pause that refreshes.

Speaker 31 (02:41:13):
Oh.

Speaker 7 (02:41:14):
Another sweet episode of Claudia seventy eight years ago, October seventh,
nineteen forty seven, here on Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Cox.
Coming up tomorrow on the podcast Our Wednesday Humpday Show
will have William Gargan as Mary Craig, confidential Investigator from
nineteen fifty two Murder by Threes, Nick Comer is Boston

(02:41:37):
Blackie in the story of the murdered show dog owner
The Adventures of Philip Marlow from nineteen forty nine. In
The Open Window and Calling All Cars from eighty nine,
years ago, The Holy twenty one, and another episode of
Claudia Is It's Mama's Birthday? Alrighty, that's coming up tomorrow.

(02:41:58):
Thank you for being with us here on this Tuesday
Classic Radio Theater. I'm Wyatt Cox.

Speaker 30 (02:42:07):
H

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Classic Radio 10-07-25 - Fred and Charlie Audition, A Camel, and Higher Education

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Classic Radio 10-07-25 - Fred and Charlie Audition, A Camel, and Higher Education