Classic Radio 11-21-25 - Thanksgiving Dinners, and Jack thinks he's a turkey - Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Cox

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
Now the greatest radio shows of all time.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
Huspense, Shadow Note Washington calling David Honey count.

Speaker 3 (00:19):
As my classic Radios Theater.

Speaker 4 (00:21):
The Great Yielderslide, Zipa McGee and Molly Dragon Gun Alone
Rang Zoe.

Speaker 5 (00:29):
Now step back into a time machine.

Speaker 1 (00:31):
It's your host, Wyatt Cox.

Speaker 6 (00:34):
Good Evening Friend, Vionna Tantum.

Speaker 7 (00:39):
Thanksgiving shows on this Friday with episodes of London Abner Maxwellhouse,
Coffee Time, The Jack Benny Program, The Great Giller Sleep
starring Willard Waterman, and the week's ending episode of Claudia.
That's How Straight Ahead. On this Friday, twenty first day
of November, three hundred and twenty fifth day of the year,
we have forty days left in the year. In Paris,

(01:02):
on this date in seventeen eighty three, Jean Francois Pitia
de Rosier and Francois Lauran Marquis de Arlandez made the
first untethered hot air balloon flight on this date in
seventeen eighty three. In seventeen eighty nine, North Carolina ratified
the Constitution and were admitted as the twelfth state of

(01:24):
the Union. In eighteen sixty one, Confederate President Jefferson Davis
appointed Judah Benjamin Secretary of War. Thomas Edison on this
date in eighteen seventy seven announced his invention of the phonograph,
a machine that can record sound. Albert Einstein's paper does
the inertia of a Body depend upon its energy? Content?

(01:47):
Published in eighteen nineteen oh five in the Journal of
a Physics Journal. The paper revealing the relationship between energy
and mass, leading to the equation E equals A squared.
In nineteen twenty two, Rebecca Latimer Felton of Georgia to
the oath of office, becoming the first female United States Senator.

(02:10):
In nineteen twenty two. Ela Fitzgerald made her singing debut
on this date. In nineteen thirty four, at the tender
age of sixteen, at Harlem's famed Apollo Theater. The radio
program King Biscuit Time broadcast for the first time in
nineteen forty one. It had become the longest running daily

(02:31):
radio broadcast in history and the most famous live blues
radio program. The completion of the Alaskan Highway, the Alcan Highway,
celebrated on this date in nineteen forty two.

Speaker 8 (02:44):
American engineers have conquered the untamed Canadian wilderness mountains and
Muskeg and trackless Pine Tangle have given way to the
Alaska Highway. Today, it is open for the convoying of
supplies to the Alaskan Warfront, t one hundred mile length
with the base of men and materials in Canada and
the United States. Officially designated as the Alkan Highway. Its

(03:08):
completion three months ahead of schedule, has won the praise
of an embattled people, praise for the American soldier engineers,
twentieth century pioneers who worked long days and nights in
temperatures ranging from thirty five degrees below zero to ninety above.

Speaker 7 (03:24):
An excerp from a nineteen forty two War Department film
the highway not usual by general vehicles until nineteen forty three.
President Nixon and Japanese Premier Saito agreed in Washington on
this date in nineteen sixty nine on the return of
Okinawa to Japanese control in nineteen seventy two. Under term
C the agreement, the US was to retain rights to

(03:46):
bases on the island, but those would be nuclear free.
The embassy in Islamabad, Pakistan, of the US attacked by
a mob in nineteen seventy nine and set on fire
for people killed. A deadly fire broke out at the
MGM Grand Hotel in Las Vegas in nineteen eighty now

(04:06):
Bally's Casino.

Speaker 9 (04:08):
It's on my way to work. The MGM Hotel was
in golf and plains on the bottom floor, away and
high a tempt for you could see the terrible trade
look like at the end of the world. To me,
my god, it was Morgan people everywhere. Those about forty
fire truck ambulance people, and they were trying to contain
the planes, but it was burning faster than they could

(04:28):
do anything with bad people on the legends and helicopters
trying to get them off the room.

Speaker 7 (04:33):
Eighty seven people killed, more than six hundred and fifty
injured in the worst disaster in the bad of history.
By the way, I need to correct myself, the former
MGM Hotel became Bally's. It is now Horseshoe Las Vegas.
It was renamed after the Horseshoe was moved out of
downtown Las Vegas. Used to be Binians. Now that's all

(04:59):
renamed Horseshoe for some reason. It was on this date
also in nineteen eighty the episode of Dallas Who's Done
It aired on USTv, one of the highest rated episodes
of a TV show ever aired, and it revealed who
shot Jr. President Reagan and Soviet Premier Gorbaschoff met for

(05:20):
the first time in Geneva on this date in nineteen
eighty five to hold talks on international diplomatic relations and
the arms race.

Speaker 10 (05:28):
We packed a lot into the last two days. I
came to Geneva to seek a fresh start in relations
between the United States and the Soviet Union, and we
have done this.

Speaker 7 (05:40):
It was on this date in nineteen ninety one the
Apple of God's Eye, an undercover investigation journalism piece exposing
the fundraising practices of American televangelist Robert Tilton, aired on
ABC's primetime Live News magazine show for the first time.
Toy Story, released on this date in nine nineteen ninety five,

(06:00):
is the first feature link film created completely using computer
generated imagery. Oh if they could see what AI can
do today? The Dow Jones Industrial Laborde closing above five
thousand for the first time on this date in nineteen
ninety five, and on that same date in nineteen ninety
five in Dayton, Ohio, Mosnian leaders from the Serb, Croat

(06:23):
and Muslim factions initialed an agreement in more than three
years of bitter fighting. President Clinton called it an important event.

Speaker 6 (06:32):
As often happens in a process like this, as I
think happened in the Middle East.

Speaker 8 (06:37):
Something stirred among the leaders themselves, and they decided that
they should not let this moment pass.

Speaker 7 (06:43):
In two thousand and seven, officials announced the recall of
more a half million pieces of Chinese made children's jewelry
contaminated with lead. Friends, this is why we don't need
Chinese imports, plainly and simply was on this date four
years ago today, an suv plowed through a Christmas parade

(07:04):
in Waukeshaw, Wisconsin. Sixty two people killed. Six people killed,
sixty two injured. Daryl Brooks, Junior convicted of seventy six counts,
including six counts of first degree intentional homicide. He was
sentenced to life in prison with no chance of release.
Waukeshaw County Circuit District Judge Jennifer Durow handed down the sentence.

Speaker 11 (07:30):
The actions of Daryl Brooks demand punishment. The community is
not safe from your violent and criminal conduct unless you
are in custody.

Speaker 7 (07:42):
Among those passing away on this date in history, boxer
Max Bear, the father of Max Bear Junior, who was
Jethrow Bodeine in The Beverly Hillbillies, announcer Harry Vonzel, actor
director Bill Bixby, Mad Dog, the Sean, Maurice Vashon, a

(08:02):
fine pro wrestler, singer, songwriter, guitarist David Cassidy, and Robert Benschley.

Speaker 12 (08:09):
I am confident that we may safely say at the
present time that the depression is over and that viscerbedness
better business conditions are just around the corner. What I
say just around the corner, I mean just around the corn.

Speaker 13 (08:30):
Now, what were the primary causes of the depression as
we call it? Overproduction, maladjustments in gold distribution, overproduction, deplation,
too little, thyroid's decretion or plots, disease, too much vermo,

(08:50):
overproduction and by the same token, under production.

Speaker 12 (08:56):
Then too, there was the Gulf Stream.

Speaker 13 (09:00):
All of these helped lead to inflation, deplation, and overproduction,
with a consequent depression.

Speaker 7 (09:08):
A nineteen thirty thirty one short recording from Robert Benschley,
who passed away on this date back in nineteen forty
five birthdates. Of those who are no longer with us
on this date include the French philosopher Roldtaire, Pope Benedict
the Sixteenth, musician Coleman Hawkins, actress Eleanor Powell, baseball legend,

(09:31):
Stan Musial, Joe Campanella, wonderful actor, a musician, doctor John
the One of the wild Samoans Apa Anoy rodeo cowboy,
Larry Mayhan, and from the original Ghostbusters movies Harold Ramos,
all born on this date in history. They have all

(09:51):
officially left the building.

Speaker 6 (09:54):
Hi, this is Jeff Foxworthy. It is now time for
the birthday announcements. The following people are now officially older
than dirt.

Speaker 7 (10:02):
This is the birthday of that girl, Danny Thomas's daughter,
Marlow Thomas eighty eight years old. Today, the delightful Goldie
Han is eighty today.

Speaker 1 (10:13):
I've made up my mind, Julian went through.

Speaker 14 (10:16):
I've decided I want to man of my own exclusively,
no more going half season.

Speaker 7 (10:20):
Goldiehan eighty years old. I watched some more of the
great stuff from Ronan Martin's laugh In And yes it
was counterculture at the time, And yes some would call
it extreme leftists today. But you know what, it didn't
matter if it's right or left. It was funny. There
was a lot of funny stuff in laughing, and one

(10:42):
of them was Goldiehan, who suffered from that Jack Benny disease.
You could break him up, break her up real easy
back in the day. Also, Judy Garland's daughter Laura left
seventy three today. Musician Stephen Curtis Chapman is sixty three
from not Slanding and Desperate Housewives. Nicolette Sheridan is sixty two.

(11:05):
Pro wrestler Shane Douglas, the first Extreme Championship Wrestling champion,
sixty one years old today. Icelandic singer b Yorke is
sixty A couple of other wrestlers, Nikki and Brie Bella
forty two years of age. From the Hunger Games. Genlemen

(11:26):
Alone is forty one. Singer Carly ray Jepson says She'll
call you maybe. She is forty years old today, and
from eighteen eighty three, Isabelle May is twenty five. Those
just a few of the people celebrating the twenty first
day of November is their birthday. If this is your birthday.

Speaker 12 (11:48):
We baked you a Birthday, Kate.

Speaker 15 (11:51):
If you get it to may A and you moan
and grown and low.

Speaker 16 (11:56):
Don't forget we told you so.

Speaker 17 (12:00):
Macauishneer and blow out the candles.

Speaker 18 (12:04):
Here they go.

Speaker 7 (12:13):
Classic Radio Theater continues here as we're into our Thanksgiving mode,
So we're going to be having some mixed bags. We've
got a lot of comedy today and primarily we're going
to start off with Lomon Abner. This goes back seventy
seven years and that's going to be first here on
this edition of Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Cos. But
with Thanksgiving coming on the way, you're going all all

(12:35):
that stuff I used to be able to eat at Thanksgiving,
I can't eat it anymore because I can't digest things
as well as I used to.

Speaker 19 (12:42):
Can.

Speaker 7 (12:42):
I suggest you look at Professor Bees Digestive Aid before
the holiday gets here. It is a natural, no fuss
solution for everyday digestive woes. Two ingredients, nothing fancy, honey
and an herb from ancient Rome, appa Thera. It was
used to help somebody who was having extreme issues with

(13:06):
digestive issues going through cancer therapies. Well guess what, It's
helped people with cancer therapies people who have acid reflux,
who suffer from throat problems. And it works, and all
you gotta do is try it out. There is a guarantee,
so if it doesn't work, return it and you will

(13:26):
be taken care of. Check it out at profbees dot com.
Profbees dot com, the links in the show notes. The
links also at Classic Radio dot stream. But here's a
great thing. Use my promo code wyat and it does
two things. Number one, it saves you ten percent. Number two,
we receive a percentage of what of your purchase. I mean,

(13:50):
look at it this way, friends, you got nothing to lose,
you got everything to gain. Go to profbees dot com.
Profbees dot com, and you also support the podcast that
brings you all these wonderful classic radio programs. Profbees dot com.
Promo code wyatt and preserve not only your peace of

(14:11):
mind and preserve your enjoyment in these great shows, but
also preserve your gut health. That's very important. Up first,
Love an after.

Speaker 20 (14:27):
Alert today, alive tomorrow.

Speaker 8 (14:31):
Plan now with your family for civil defense emergency action.

Speaker 6 (14:35):
Someday it may save your lives.

Speaker 8 (14:37):
Join work and share together with others this knowledge of
self help civil defense an American tradition.

Speaker 7 (14:45):
Classic radio theater with Wyatt Cocks many times. What they
did with Amos and Andy is they took a number
of their quarter hour shows storylines. They would you through
two and three weeks of the show and then condense
them into single half hour episodes. And that's kind of
what you got today. Lomond Amner, this is as going

(15:06):
back to what is it? Seventy eight years ago? November
twenty first, nineteen forty eight.

Speaker 6 (15:19):
Hi, Grannie is Adner? I believe that's our ring Ah.

Speaker 21 (15:26):
Bridgidaire presents the new lom and Abner Show.

Speaker 22 (15:40):
Tonight.

Speaker 21 (15:41):
Brigidaire, a division of General Voters, brings you a brand
new kind of visit for those old characters down in
pine Ridge, featuring Clarence Hartzel has Ben Weathers, the music
of Felix Mills, and starring your old favorites Love and Am.

(16:10):
America's number one refrigerator is Frigidaire. Yes, any way you
look at it, America's number one refrigerator is Frigidaire. Number
one in popularity for more frigid air refrigerators serve in
more American homes than any other make number one in
thrilling new advantages as you can see for yourself at

(16:31):
any Frigidaire dealers, and number one independability for frigid air
refrigerators are made only by general voters. And this association
of experience with experience, of skill with skill is your
guarantee of lasting satisfaction. So when it comes to a
new refrigerator for your home, remember this. The first name

(16:53):
you think of is the right one to buy Frigidair
America's number one refriger raper. As we look in on

(17:17):
the little community of pine Ridge today, we find the
old fellows in their jonham Don store.

Speaker 6 (17:22):
Loma is talking on the telephone. Listen, the shore is
a pleasant surprise. Miss Why sure, Miss Rowene?

Speaker 22 (17:31):
Why sure?

Speaker 6 (17:33):
Oh but yes miss Roween, Ah but beans, miss Oh,
that'll be just wonderful Miss Roween Oh loved me, Yes mine, goodbye? Hi,
Granny's abner. Guess who that was?

Speaker 22 (17:51):
Grover Cleveland?

Speaker 6 (17:54):
Now you recollect that cousin of Ezra Sea Strong's that
was here one time before?

Speaker 22 (17:58):
Or I know who you mean? Are you done talking
to her now?

Speaker 6 (18:02):
Yeah? Sure?

Speaker 22 (18:02):
Why well take the receiver out of your pocket and
hang it up.

Speaker 6 (18:09):
How did that get in there?

Speaker 17 (18:10):
Lom?

Speaker 22 (18:11):
Why don't you stay away from her the other times
she's here. You've got to bragging on yourself and just
got yourself in trouble, and you'll do the same thing again.

Speaker 6 (18:19):
I will not. She just got in town and she's
dropping over here to invite me to take Thanksgiving dinner
with her.

Speaker 22 (18:25):
Why did she mention it?

Speaker 6 (18:28):
No?

Speaker 22 (18:29):
Did she talk about eating? Uh no, did she bring
up the word Thanksgiving?

Speaker 6 (18:35):
Oh? No, lom.

Speaker 22 (18:38):
If you do go over, i'd suggest you pack yourself
a little lunch.

Speaker 6 (18:45):
Oh, she'll invite me, don't you worry. I'll work the
conversation around to where she will.

Speaker 22 (18:50):
Yeah, but Thanksgiving will be over by then.

Speaker 6 (18:53):
Wait a minute, Wait a minute, there she comes across the street. Now, oh,
look at that wall an. You go back in the
feed room or any place. You sort of warped my personality.

Speaker 22 (19:02):
It was pretty well bent when I first met.

Speaker 6 (19:06):
I hurry up, Eva, and don't sit back there and listen.

Speaker 22 (19:09):
I wouldn't thanks.

Speaker 6 (19:10):
Now listen here, you little snoop. Oh excuse me, mister roweenie.

Speaker 23 (19:15):
Oh mister oh, but it's delightful to see you again,
Buck delightful.

Speaker 6 (19:21):
I'm delightful too.

Speaker 23 (19:23):
But two, it's so nice being in your queen little
village once more.

Speaker 6 (19:30):
Oh hit just queen? Is all get out special round
Thanksgiving time with folks inviting one another to dinner.

Speaker 17 (19:39):
Well, now that.

Speaker 23 (19:40):
You mentioned it, mister Edwards, I was thinking of inviting
you over to the Sea's chunks for Thanksgivings enough, but
I don't know when I could get any domestics.

Speaker 6 (19:49):
Oh well, Turkey's plenty good enough for.

Speaker 23 (19:51):
Me, I'm repeating to sevens.

Speaker 6 (19:56):
Well, Turkey's good enough for them too.

Speaker 23 (19:59):
But I am speaking of the servant problem, mister Edwards.
You know how one suffers from that nowadays?

Speaker 6 (20:05):
Oh doj one? I suffer something stupendeous from God.

Speaker 23 (20:10):
If I'd had any sense, I would have brought my
chef along with me. The French made by father, the
best one, don't you think, oh?

Speaker 6 (20:17):
By, for I had to make one up for me
the other day.

Speaker 23 (20:22):
Oh do you have one? And what's his name? Who
where your French cook?

Speaker 16 (20:28):
Oh?

Speaker 6 (20:28):
Him? Why French? Let's see, I call him Mademoiselle Alphonse.

Speaker 22 (20:36):
Isn't that a rather odd name for him?

Speaker 6 (20:38):
Well, he's a ferner, you know.

Speaker 24 (20:41):
Oh?

Speaker 25 (20:42):
Oh yes, here, what.

Speaker 6 (20:44):
Time is this Thanksgiving dinner going to be?

Speaker 24 (20:46):
Well?

Speaker 17 (20:46):
I'm not sure.

Speaker 23 (20:48):
I'm not used to entertaining in so small a place
as the seas Chunks is. And they home in London
and Ohio, it wasn't late, but it was ed quit
twenty rooms and a solarium. What size place do you have,
mister Edwards.

Speaker 6 (21:05):
Oh, it ain't much, just a little thirty room mansion,
but it's home to me.

Speaker 17 (21:12):
Do you have a solarium?

Speaker 26 (21:14):
No?

Speaker 6 (21:14):
I never cared much for swimming. What time did you
say for dinner?

Speaker 14 (21:21):
Oh?

Speaker 27 (21:22):
I don't know.

Speaker 23 (21:23):
I'm so handicapped here. Do you realize that I don't
even have an upstairs me?

Speaker 22 (21:29):
That ain't nothing. He ain't even gone upstairs?

Speaker 17 (21:34):
Who said that?

Speaker 6 (21:35):
Nobody? That was just the wind. Now about this Thanksgiving dinner.
I'd love to have you over to my place, but
I ain't got half enough servants to run the mansion
right now, and I wouldn't feel right asking you to
come over there and rough it.

Speaker 28 (21:48):
Oh but I'd love that, mister Edwards.

Speaker 6 (21:50):
And what time will it be? Well, miss Rowena, you
do make it for seven?

Speaker 23 (21:54):
And thank you so much, you, dear sweet boy.

Speaker 29 (21:58):
But dear, but mis.

Speaker 6 (22:02):
Oh man, you shut up.

Speaker 22 (22:06):
I never said a word, you, dear sweet boy, now
shut that out house everything around the mansion.

Speaker 6 (22:15):
I told you not to listen, you little leaves droop.

Speaker 22 (22:20):
You got the only clapboard mansion I ever heard of.

Speaker 6 (22:24):
All right, Abner, word all them servants.

Speaker 22 (22:26):
You're asleep on that one horse hair, Sophie.

Speaker 6 (22:30):
All right, so I exaggerated the little Oh.

Speaker 22 (22:33):
I don't know, man, it's a time I saw that
French cooka. You're standing over a hot solarium, botting up
a mess of coon and.

Speaker 6 (22:44):
Collars, Adner, don't you realize the jam I'm in here.
I've got to put on a Thanksgiving dinner in a
mansion which I ain't got, with some servants which I
ain't got. This calls for brains which you ain't got.
Thanksgiving ain't but a few days off.

Speaker 22 (23:02):
Yeah, I doubt if you could build a mansion by then,
not even with all fonts helping you.

Speaker 6 (23:07):
I might as well forget the whole thing. Lady kept
my big mouth shut.

Speaker 22 (23:11):
Amen.

Speaker 6 (23:14):
Even if I did have a nice place, I don't
know where i'd get any servants or wait a.

Speaker 22 (23:19):
Minute, Abner, Oh no, no, no, you don't now listen,
No listen, Abnue, No, I ain't ask you anything yet
In the first place, I can't cook. In the second place,
I can't talk French. In the third place, I wouldn't
do it in the first place.

Speaker 6 (23:38):
All right, then you can be my English butler.

Speaker 22 (23:40):
No no, I'm gonna be eating at home that day
with my own little family, and they couldn't get along
without me. Bless their hearts.

Speaker 6 (23:47):
By less, abner, you'll be all done. That's your a
place for the time. I don't need you.

Speaker 22 (23:53):
No, no, no, no, no, no no no.

Speaker 6 (23:55):
That takes care of my butler. Now, who can I get?
Wait a minut? There comes Ben with us. I wonder
if he can cook? Ah, Hi, Grannie's come on in here, Ben,
old boy, just a feller. I want to see. Can
you talk French?

Speaker 17 (24:09):
Ben?

Speaker 22 (24:09):
Well, I'm a few want to learn to speak French.
But ma'am, you want the cicerold Gundl who's he?

Speaker 6 (24:16):
Yes, Look Ben, all I'm interested in is getting a
French cook.

Speaker 22 (24:23):
I see, And you want to know how to converse
with him in his native tongue.

Speaker 6 (24:26):
No, Ben, I don't c.

Speaker 22 (24:31):
Cser Old Gundo mild lighty Rusident made an exhaustive study
of the French language immediately after the First World War.
He wanted to learn the meaning of the words of
Mademoiselle from Army Fire. Yeah, well, Ben, I don't actually
And the five years of concentrated study he discovered that

(24:51):
the song was represent English. Well, why couldn't you have
told that in the first place? Cicerold Gundle is an Armenian.

Speaker 17 (25:02):
Ah.

Speaker 22 (25:03):
Now, the only trouble is I see it loam. Before
ciss Row can teach you French, you'll have to learn
our meeting.

Speaker 6 (25:11):
Then I told you I don't want to learn no language.
I'm just trying to arrange for a Thanksgiving dinner.

Speaker 22 (25:16):
Oh well, the place you want to go then is
toler Money's restaurant. But then I might a short order
house in Mount i Talman Minnie. It's run by a
man named Tom and his wife. Her name is Irene Irene, Well,
who's mini by? On Thanksgiving Day? You can get a

(25:43):
chicken fried steak there, cut from the shape of a
turkey wing. Perhaps you've eaten their alum, No, I ain't.
Maybe you hit it in nineteen thirty seven, that was
the year it was closed up by the Board of Health.

Speaker 6 (25:56):
Then all I'm trying to do is put on this
dinner for Ezra Sea Strump's cousin, Miss Roweni. But I
need a batch of servants to do it. Now. Abner
here has been assigned to the butler job. I never
said i'd sign nothing, and I thought maybe you could
be my French chief.

Speaker 22 (26:10):
Then, Oh, thank you very highly.

Speaker 24 (26:11):
Lo.

Speaker 22 (26:12):
But I've been invaded over to the Walt Bateses for dinner.
That bad as if they don't go out of town.

Speaker 6 (26:18):
Wait a minute, is there a chance the bats is
going to be gone on Thanksgiving?

Speaker 22 (26:22):
My dog is long. That would be the place for
you to sneak into. It ain't exactly a thirty room mansion,
but it's the biggest house in town.

Speaker 6 (26:29):
Oh, I wouldn't think of such a thing hardly. Yeah,
call them up and see if they're sure not gonna.

Speaker 19 (26:36):
Leave it all right?

Speaker 6 (26:37):
Sure, but don't let on why you want to know her?
Hello Walt Bates speaking.

Speaker 22 (26:50):
Say Walt, this is Abner Peabody.

Speaker 8 (26:53):
Oh just a minute, Abner, I'm talking business with the
tiller here hold the phone a second. All right, Well,
that's it's the deal in a mister vaiborg yep. And
if you folks are leaving tonight, I'll bring my crew
in here. First thing in the morning and spray this
place from top to bottom. When we get done, there
won't be a living bug and no kind left in
the joint. Well go, and if any new pests get

(27:16):
in here, they're in for an awful surprise. How soon
can we get back in the house. Well, I wouldn't
come back till a few days after Thanksgiving. But if
you do have to go in the house for any
reason before that, whatever you do, don't light no matches.

Speaker 6 (27:33):
Blow you clean out of here. And now remember, don't
light no matches. See, don't worry. Don't worry.

Speaker 8 (27:39):
We won't and I'll see you when we get back. Right,
hold on, hello, Ebner, Yeah, I say wall.

Speaker 22 (27:45):
I was just wondering if you're going to need some
groceres for Thanksgiving.

Speaker 8 (27:48):
No, no, we're going out of town, going to deep
up the joint.

Speaker 22 (27:53):
Oh well, you'll enjoy it there, have a nice Thanksgiving,
and don't hurry back.

Speaker 6 (28:16):
And they're sure we're not going to be gone huh yeah, uh.

Speaker 22 (28:18):
They're going to some place called the Bugler Joint, the
built Junction perhaps, well something like that.

Speaker 30 (28:31):
Never heard of him.

Speaker 6 (28:34):
Yeah, it looks like I'm all set. Then we'll cook
the dinner, right, over there in Wall's kitchen.

Speaker 22 (28:37):
Yeah yeah, and build up a nice far in that
big fireplace.

Speaker 30 (28:40):
Of he here.

Speaker 22 (28:41):
Yeah, I look, light some candles on the dinner table.

Speaker 6 (28:46):
Wait on, miss Rowling, he sees all that I grant
as we're put on the biggest one blowout she's ever been.

Speaker 22 (29:06):
Oh me, don't expect no sympathy from me, law Edwards.
If you think I'm gonna help you with your Thanksgiving dinner,
you got another thank of comments.

Speaker 18 (29:15):
I'm red versus peabody.

Speaker 6 (29:16):
Happy Thanksgiving?

Speaker 22 (29:17):
Well how do you, mister Niles? Yes, it is a
happy Thanksgiving for some people say, didn't I hear something
about your needing help with your Thanksgiving dinner?

Speaker 6 (29:27):
Mister Edwards, Well, i'm your man. I'm your man. You
are well. Bless you, mister Niles, and bless Frigid Air
for sending you here. Now, what about the turkey? Is
that quite a problem?

Speaker 21 (29:39):
No problem at all for anybody with a roomy, new
frigid Air refrigerator. Just prepare your turkey a day or
two ahead of Thanksgiving and keep it in your frigidaire.

Speaker 6 (29:48):
There's still plenty of room for other holiday fixings. Salad,
hot biscuits, maybe, well, salad the same way.

Speaker 21 (29:55):
Prepare it before you get busy with the last minute cooking,
keep it fresh and crisp your frigid air refrigerator. And
really smart cooks mixed dough for hot breads or pastries
ahead of time, even roll it out and cut it.
Then keep it safe in there frigid air refrigerators or
frigid air home freezers. And when I say safe, I
really mean safe. For the frigid air is the only

(30:18):
refrigerator with a meter mizer, the simplest and most reliable
cold making mechanism ever built.

Speaker 22 (30:23):
And can you bake a funcking pie? Billy boy, Billy boy?

Speaker 21 (30:28):
Why a frigid air electric range makes any holiday cooking
a breeze. One model even has two ovens, so you
can bake a pie in one while the turkey is
roasting in the other. For lots of oven cooking, you
don't even have to stay in the kitchen. The cook
Master oven control turns the oven on and off all
by itself. Oh sure, thanksgiving dinners a cinch for anybody

(30:51):
with a frigid air refrigerator and frigid air electric range.

Speaker 6 (30:54):
Well, I'm sure grad you're reminded me mister. Now, by
the way, what size head have you got? What size head? Why? Uh?
I wear a seven of.

Speaker 21 (31:05):
Them mates hat, that's what you mean? But what for
your chef's cat?

Speaker 6 (31:09):
Because if I can't find a real cook like you said,
you are my man.

Speaker 22 (31:26):
Dog Islam the Baits has got a nice house here,
but it only seems you let it smells kind of
cute you're in here.

Speaker 6 (31:35):
Yeah it does, but I think when we start to
fire in the fireplace that'll clear everything out of here.

Speaker 22 (31:43):
You want me to light it now?

Speaker 6 (31:46):
No, wait on, mister Rowen you get here. Yes, she'll
get a big bang out of that. And you better
get into your buttlesuit.

Speaker 22 (31:54):
Lom, I ain't gonna wear that thing. Man, Britches is
for a boy. It just come to my knees, that's
where they're supposed to come. And them socks are women's stockings,
white cotton, lill just like Elizabeth wares once she dresses up.

Speaker 6 (32:08):
Abner, stop fussing. Ben Withers is having to wear a
worse get up than you. And you don't hear him hollering.

Speaker 22 (32:14):
Why what have you done with him?

Speaker 6 (32:17):
When he's done nothing? Wait a minute, there he comes.
Now he's got it on?

Speaker 22 (32:21):
Is that ben where they laugh?

Speaker 6 (32:24):
I don't laugh at him.

Speaker 22 (32:25):
Man, they refuse to wear this customer. I am suffering
relations with you as was now, and that's retrolective from
here on.

Speaker 6 (32:41):
Then it's too late to back out. Now, let's see
better check on the vitals, hey, Alfon?

Speaker 22 (32:46):
Oh, al fun, Yeah, let's see what he's got on.
Come in here, Alphon, Hey, wait a minute?

Speaker 17 (32:52):
Long?

Speaker 22 (32:52):
Is Cedric Alphonse? I thought the frigid air.

Speaker 6 (32:55):
Fellow was gonna be No, he was, but I found
out he couldn't talk French.

Speaker 22 (33:00):
And Sedric? Can I suppose?

Speaker 1 (33:02):
Uh?

Speaker 22 (33:02):
Sadric, Let's hear you say something in French? Oh what
does that mean in English? Seems a little something in
the translationship, Alphonse?

Speaker 6 (33:21):
How are you coming with your chaff work?

Speaker 24 (33:23):
Oh?

Speaker 6 (33:24):
Fun, I've worked two French words already.

Speaker 18 (33:26):
Oi.

Speaker 22 (33:29):
Yeah, but have you got the dinner cook?

Speaker 19 (33:31):
Oh?

Speaker 6 (33:32):
Was I supposed to do that too?

Speaker 17 (33:33):
Uh?

Speaker 6 (33:34):
For pity's sakes? Well, it's too late to cook it now. Yeah,
you better just run down to Luke Spear's restaurant and
buy everything ready made. And hurry up, Alphonse, because mister
Roweni will be here before long. And Abner get into
your buttle duds.

Speaker 22 (33:47):
I ain't going to do it.

Speaker 1 (33:48):
How long?

Speaker 22 (33:50):
Uh just plain flat ain't going to do it, and
that is final. Long there seems in my stocking straight.

Speaker 6 (34:12):
Yeah, they look fine. I might pull them up a
little more. Swa, your legs look like two ropes with knotstide.

Speaker 22 (34:22):
Well, couldn't I just wear a pair of overhalls?

Speaker 17 (34:25):
Beat?

Speaker 22 (34:25):
Sort of a country butler.

Speaker 6 (34:27):
You know you're an English butler. Your name's Hawkins, Abner Hawkins,
you know, just hawking ah and recollect that I'm a
royalties I'm a duke or a prince or maybe even
an earl. I don't know.

Speaker 22 (34:39):
Now where did you get that out of it?

Speaker 6 (34:43):
Well, don't forget. My name's Edwards. I go back to
the king Edergs of England. I think I wish you'd
go back there right now, so I'll be sure and
call me the earl and call miss Rowena or something
high class like her ladyship for something little shore than
I'm used to hobnobbing around with the castle crowd.

Speaker 31 (35:03):
Or hawk in.

Speaker 22 (35:06):
Yes, you're earlship.

Speaker 6 (35:08):
I do believe our guest has a roping.

Speaker 22 (35:14):
I'll get up and let her in.

Speaker 6 (35:16):
That's your job.

Speaker 22 (35:17):
I'll flip you to see who doesn't.

Speaker 6 (35:21):
I'm a man a few words. When I crook my
finger at you, that means come here.

Speaker 22 (35:25):
Well, I'm a man a few words too, And when
I shake my head that means I ain't coming.

Speaker 6 (35:32):
For goodness, say get that door all right.

Speaker 30 (35:34):
I'm getting.

Speaker 22 (35:36):
Ah good evening. You're a high class ladyship. Won't you
tip into the parlor?

Speaker 17 (35:43):
Old beans?

Speaker 19 (35:46):
Vid your pardon?

Speaker 22 (35:47):
How the whole one? Piccadilly?

Speaker 17 (35:51):
Uh?

Speaker 6 (35:52):
Hawking, Just show the lady in and let it go
at that please and.

Speaker 22 (35:55):
Follow me, duchess hey, uh little who's hair?

Speaker 30 (36:01):
A mister ah, mister h.

Speaker 23 (36:09):
Oh, but you do have a lovely chase here, but lovely.

Speaker 6 (36:14):
Oh, it's all right to knock around in. It keeps
me off the street.

Speaker 23 (36:21):
Hawkins, I wonder if you'd mind doing something beside us.

Speaker 22 (36:26):
Lord, I don't know what to do with them little sheep.
That wouldn't hurt him, Hawkins. Just take the ladies, pray
mackinaw and hang it up in.

Speaker 6 (36:44):
The vest of you.

Speaker 22 (36:48):
Yeah, I reckon, that's the best thing to do. Get
it out of sight. I told me, howdy, hold blny.

Speaker 23 (36:56):
You man has a rather picture an accent yes, it
is q here. What top of England is he from?

Speaker 22 (37:05):
Oh?

Speaker 6 (37:05):
You know here? And there.

Speaker 17 (37:08):
Is he?

Speaker 32 (37:08):
An Essex man?

Speaker 6 (37:10):
No, the only thing he's ever drives a saxon.

Speaker 23 (37:16):
Oh mister dat was What a lovely old fireplace you have?

Speaker 6 (37:21):
Might we have a pile in it?

Speaker 17 (37:22):
Oh?

Speaker 23 (37:23):
But indeed a little pile always liven upper holiday.

Speaker 17 (37:27):
Doesn't you think?

Speaker 6 (37:28):
Oh in dubious Hawkins, did you buzz your earlship? Yes? Hawkins?
Will you please catch a match to the logs?

Speaker 22 (37:38):
It would be a pleasure in deeds.

Speaker 6 (37:40):
Thank you Hawkys, not at all, earlship?

Speaker 22 (37:45):
Uh got a match on your dutchess?

Speaker 6 (37:52):
Your pardon, Hawkins, find some matches yourself and hurry up while.

Speaker 28 (37:58):
You're preparing the pile.

Speaker 23 (37:59):
I think I'm proud of my news.

Speaker 33 (38:02):
And do you have an upstairs mee?

Speaker 6 (38:04):
Oh but natural? Oh, Bernice Hawkins, will you please as
this from that gruffel? And Bernice? Will you fetch miss
Rowena powder puff?

Speaker 22 (38:20):
Lay?

Speaker 1 (38:21):
Uh?

Speaker 23 (38:22):
Never mind, I'd lose my owns. Oh is it all
right if I smooth?

Speaker 6 (38:27):
Yeah? Sure, go right ahead.

Speaker 23 (38:30):
Do you happen to have a cigarette like?

Speaker 8 (38:32):
Uh?

Speaker 6 (38:32):
Yeah, Hawkins? Have you found them matches yet?

Speaker 16 (38:35):
Oh?

Speaker 22 (38:35):
I forgot about that. Well, here, I think I have
a mate. That's fine, Bernie, I'm sure I must have
one of my plants pockets, Bernie, what oh my? What's
the battles?

Speaker 6 (38:52):
But Bernice, you better run out in the kitchen and
help out dish up the victuals. I told him to
garnish the plates with a stalk of celery. Now see
that he does it.

Speaker 22 (39:05):
Well, Hey, I found a mattress. You want to fire up, duchess?

Speaker 19 (39:09):
Why?

Speaker 17 (39:10):
Yes, thank you?

Speaker 6 (39:13):
Dinner sir, y y, come and get it?

Speaker 23 (39:18):
Uh, never mind, Hawkins, I'll have the cigarette lee tak.

Speaker 22 (39:21):
Yeah, all right, sure, sure, let's get in there.

Speaker 6 (39:23):
The grub's on, Miss Roweni. Would you care to walk
into the dining room on my arms?

Speaker 14 (39:28):
Oh?

Speaker 22 (39:31):
I don't believe she can do it.

Speaker 19 (39:42):
I do.

Speaker 6 (39:42):
Hope you've worked up a good appetite, Miss Roweni goes out.
Fonse's knocked yourself out cooking up about your high class
French vittles.

Speaker 33 (39:49):
I hope he has some candidies.

Speaker 22 (39:51):
Yeah, I've got a canope.

Speaker 6 (39:56):
Hand a harmony grip Sery, Hawkins, shut u, mister ROWEENI
you sat over there and I'll.

Speaker 32 (40:02):
Sit here, thank you.

Speaker 22 (40:05):
Hey, Hey, wait, a minute here. You ain't set a
place for me and Bernieese.

Speaker 6 (40:09):
Of course not. You're the servants.

Speaker 19 (40:10):
You eat it.

Speaker 22 (40:12):
Well, I'll be a polka dotted possum. I log as
if I ain't gratitude for you, Hawkins, just mind your
own business. I'm sorry, miss Rowena, this servant problem. My
mind is getting worse all the time.

Speaker 23 (40:26):
Yes, I can see that.

Speaker 6 (40:29):
Well, let's dive in, miss Roweni. Oh Hawkins, come back
here and light the candles. It's getting dark in here, all.

Speaker 22 (40:36):
Right, all right, don't know where I've got strength enough
to strike a matcho as hungry as I am.

Speaker 17 (40:42):
Mister Edwards.

Speaker 23 (40:43):
I hate to bring this up, but my food seems
to be all stuck.

Speaker 17 (40:47):
To the plate.

Speaker 6 (40:48):
E'xc your sore as mine. That's the French cooks for you.

Speaker 23 (40:52):
Oh, all punch and if you'll pardon my thing, so
it all smells like shellac?

Speaker 6 (41:00):
Did you call me monsieur dog?

Speaker 22 (41:02):
I can't get these matches to struct?

Speaker 34 (41:04):
Yeah?

Speaker 6 (41:04):
I called you alvans. Our victals are stuck to the plate.
And where's the cellarst offs? I told you to garnish
the place with garnish.

Speaker 35 (41:12):
Yeah, oh, I thought you said, Varney.

Speaker 19 (41:31):
This is dridful, but pul.

Speaker 6 (41:34):
Now, now, miss ROWEENI don't leave.

Speaker 22 (41:36):
There must be one match in here to life, this.

Speaker 6 (41:38):
Roweenie, Please don't leave. I can explain this whole mess,
and I may as well tell you the truth. Yes,
you're gonna hate me, but this ain't my house and
these ain't my servants. I ain't nothing at all. And
I know you'll never speak to me again as long
as you live. And I don't blame you.

Speaker 28 (41:53):
Why you, dear sweet boy, going to all that trouble.

Speaker 36 (41:57):
Just for little old me?

Speaker 23 (41:58):
Oh, I think you're one fools but wonderful.

Speaker 22 (42:02):
Huh bad bingles matches And to prove it, I am
going to give you a great big kid. No now, please, yes, yes,
I'm there. I don't get here one of likes.

Speaker 6 (42:13):
Oh, mister h Granny is mister Rowan do that again?

(43:07):
Liman Abner will be back in just a moment.

Speaker 21 (43:09):
The first hair is an important question when you're preparing
Thanksgiving dinner or any dinner. Wouldn't you like to avoid
last minute rush by fixing some things ahead of time?
It's extra easy with a frigid air home freezer. Stuff
a turkey days ahead and keep it frozen store several
pies baked or unbaked. Freeze is apply of dough for

(43:31):
hot breads. Everything's safe in a frigid air home freezer.

Speaker 6 (43:35):
It's powered by the meter.

Speaker 22 (43:37):
Miser well, how you feeling by now? Hot lips.

Speaker 6 (43:52):
A little better, but Granny's abner. When Walt Bates gets
back and sees his house, he's gonna hit the ceiling.

Speaker 22 (43:58):
Hit the ceiling. He'll have to fire.

Speaker 18 (44:00):
It hurts.

Speaker 26 (44:11):
You love.

Speaker 21 (44:12):
An after Show is brought to you each week by
Frigidaire division of General Motors, manufacturers of a complete line
of home appliances, air conditioners, and refrigeration.

Speaker 6 (44:22):
Equipment for American business.

Speaker 21 (44:24):
The script is written by Roz Rogers and Betty Boyle,
with music by Felix Mills. So on the next Sunday night,
same time, same station, this is Wendell Niles saying good
night for Frigidaire America's number one refrigerator an Austine tuned
for cabin B thirteen, which part of the.

Speaker 37 (44:42):
Media be of a most of the same segment.

Speaker 22 (44:45):
Listen CBS the Columbia broadcast.

Speaker 7 (44:47):
Second seventy seven years ago November twenty first, nineteen forty eight,
eleven amneron Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Cogs Care for

(45:08):
some coffey. Maxwell House Coffee Time is next.

Speaker 2 (45:17):
A well designed school can be more than a fine
building and a place for learning. It can also protect
the children, the teachers, and the whole neighborhood too, if
the architect has designed the school to serve as a
community fallout shelter as well. Over thirteen thousand architects and
engineers have been trained in fallout shielding techniques. To learn

(45:38):
more about building fallout shelter into news schools, contact your
local civil defense director.

Speaker 7 (45:44):
Now we go back eighty five years for an episode
of Maxwell House Coffee Time, the Thanksgiving show for November
twenty first, nineteen forty.

Speaker 38 (45:53):
Nata, noaks, be quiet? Why program is going on the
air in a second?

Speaker 39 (45:58):
Hoe now?

Speaker 24 (45:59):
Because Don Wilson is standing there ready to announce it.

Speaker 39 (46:02):
I won't announce you your.

Speaker 30 (46:05):
Announce you, please, Nooks.

Speaker 6 (46:07):
The signal's coming.

Speaker 1 (46:08):
If you don't let me announce it all you watch.

Speaker 39 (46:11):
Oh my, I don't want safe things blue?

Speaker 16 (46:14):
Oh Donald, all right, Daddy, all right, let her announce it. Thanks,
go ahead, you little dictator.

Speaker 4 (46:22):
Shoot, there's a signals.

Speaker 39 (46:24):
Max Her Coffee Time.

Speaker 1 (46:28):
Ain't my good.

Speaker 4 (46:51):
And tonight the first thing on her mean he was
Maxwell House coffee. Yes, this is coffee time. Time to
sit back, relax.

Speaker 6 (46:58):
And enjoy with us.

Speaker 4 (46:59):
Let's see fragrant cup for the coffee that's good to
the last drop. Well, now we're ready for another lightning
session of entertainment with our Maxwell House stars Mary Martin,
Meredith Wilson, Hanley Stafford and Fanny Bryce as baby Snooks.
And there's a special Thanksgiving package.

Speaker 19 (47:15):
For all of you.

Speaker 4 (47:16):
Are super duper added attraction. Your favorite to me, Jack Benny.
All these wonderful personalities, in addition to your regular host
and smooth singing master of the festivities that engaging Young
Merry Andrew Dick Powell.

Speaker 8 (47:41):
Thank you, Thank you well, ladies and gentlemen. Since we
have so much show to cram enter these thirty short minutes,
this young Merry Andrew is going to engage himself in
a song fresh from the pen of Maestro Meredith Wilson
and bearing the unsentimental titles rock a by Your Baby
with a long Underwear Tune. I assume no responsibility for
the music and lyrics. My job is to keep it
on key and make it come out even with the

(48:02):
orchestration diffy.

Speaker 40 (48:03):
If you please, rack comi your may with a speed
classical tube.

Speaker 41 (48:18):
When popifide and takes you ride, and you go glide
and to the moon, to a bronze the novel or
spring for you'll be singing the sweet heart you have
rack comi your by with a sweet or dearol classical deu.

Speaker 16 (48:45):
But the kids won't.

Speaker 41 (48:46):
Tegularly nowadays, or it would really curl your head. Everything
to back too often back they call along underway for.

Speaker 42 (48:59):
Rack by your bababy with a long underwear tune.

Speaker 41 (49:05):
When Papa hiding take you riding, you go glide and
to the moon and your harness, bronze sonatas and spring
hortes make you a heart of horsey heart.

Speaker 42 (49:20):
You have so rock a bye your baby with a
long hair, long underwear.

Speaker 41 (49:28):
Fue you had a drum sonatus and spring hortet make
you hot a horsey hot.

Speaker 42 (49:39):
You have go rock harp hi corbey with a long hair,
long underwear fu.

Speaker 8 (50:02):
Thank you and I here's Don Wilson who tells me
his Thanksgiving dinner tasted just a little bit better this
year than ever before.

Speaker 6 (50:08):
What happened?

Speaker 37 (50:09):
Don?

Speaker 19 (50:09):
Did you eat both drumsticks.

Speaker 18 (50:11):
We come to think of a dick. I believe I did.

Speaker 4 (50:13):
But the real reason Thanksgiving dinner tasted extra.

Speaker 6 (50:16):
Good this year was because I get it.

Speaker 8 (50:18):
I get it, you had a double portion of pumpkin
pie smothered in whipped cream.

Speaker 6 (50:23):
That's right, Dick, I did.

Speaker 18 (50:24):
But what I'm trying to say is just this.

Speaker 4 (50:27):
I especially enjoyed Thanksgiving dinner this year because it was
topped off with a cup of the richest, most superbly
delicious coffee.

Speaker 6 (50:34):
I ever tasted.

Speaker 8 (50:35):
But surely, don this isn't the first Thanksgiving you've enjoyed
Maxwell House coffee.

Speaker 4 (50:40):
No, indeed, But never before in all it's fifty year
history has Maxwell House coffee been so rich, so full bodied,
so downright.

Speaker 6 (50:48):
Delicious as it is today.

Speaker 4 (50:50):
You see, friends, the new Maxwell House blendes extra rich
and Highland grown extra flavor coffees, coffee so rare in fragrance,
so vigorous in flavor, unlike any other coffees in the world. Naturally,
these coffees have always been limited in their availability, but
now we are able to obtain the great quantities we need.
That's why today every pound of Maxwell House has a

(51:12):
richer body, a more delicious flavor than any coffees you
may have ever known before. And yet with all this
extra goodness, right now, Maxwell House is selling at the
lowest prices in history. So this weekend, get acquainted with
the new Maxwell House coffee. Join the thousands who have
already pronounced it coffee at its best.

Speaker 8 (51:36):
Well done, Donn, and our ladies and gentlemen, going Dick.

Speaker 43 (51:39):
Hello, Hello by Jack, Jack Vinny? Well am I am
I on time?

Speaker 44 (51:51):
Why?

Speaker 24 (51:51):
Jack? Of all people, what are you doing here?

Speaker 8 (51:58):
What am I doing here?

Speaker 24 (51:59):
This is certainly a surprise, Murdith.

Speaker 30 (52:02):
Look is Jack Benny?

Speaker 8 (52:03):
Jack Benny say this is a surprise. Oh, wait a minute,
you're the last guy in the world we thought, wait
a minute, Look fellas, last week on this program you
announced that Jack Benny would be your guest here tonight.
I announced it on my own show, and not two
minutes ago. Don Wilson started off the program by introducing
the cast and Jack Benny. Who'd you expect up here tonight?

(52:25):
Jeannie with the light brown hair or Fred Allen's eagle
or something. It certainly is a surprise.

Speaker 29 (52:38):
Well, frankly, I did hear.

Speaker 8 (52:39):
Don Wilson announced Jack Benny, but I didn't associate it
with you.

Speaker 19 (52:46):
Oh you didn't.

Speaker 16 (52:47):
No, we didn't know you were the Jack Benny he
was talking about.

Speaker 8 (52:50):
Oh well, of course, imagine imagine me thinking there was
only one Jack Benny. Why that name is as common
as Stanislaus brogrosnyas the phone book is full of them. Now,
wait a minute, Jack, you don't have to get sarcastic
about it. I'm not sarcastic.

Speaker 14 (53:07):
Dick.

Speaker 8 (53:07):
Oh well, let's forget it.

Speaker 30 (53:08):
I'm here.

Speaker 8 (53:09):
You knew I was coming, and we're not fooling anybody. Okay, okay,
I guess we were bordering on the puerile and bantles.
It's a very good line, Dick. Do you mind if
I use it on my program last week.

Speaker 19 (53:24):
And we pronounced that.

Speaker 8 (53:25):
Bino If you don't mind. They didn't know me, but
they knew my material, Say Dick.

Speaker 24 (53:32):
But you know he has got blue eyes.

Speaker 8 (53:38):
Oh there they go again. You think I was the
only guy in the world with big blue eyes? Oh, hello,
Don Jack, how are you well?

Speaker 18 (53:45):
This is indeed a surprise.

Speaker 8 (53:47):
Oh kine, some enthusiasm after a honeymoon, you know, Don,
I just went through all of that with Dick. That
was our opening routine. He didn't know which Jack Benny
to expect tonight.

Speaker 4 (54:04):
I see, well, Jack, I'm sure that Dick didn't mean
to imply that your name isn't important.

Speaker 18 (54:08):
I think you were just preoccupied.

Speaker 8 (54:10):
You don't have to defend him, Don, After all, when
you get right down to things, not everybody's name is
Jack Benny, not even yours.

Speaker 19 (54:16):
Now cut that out.

Speaker 8 (54:20):
You know very well, Don, my name has been Jack
Benny ever since I've been in show business.

Speaker 18 (54:24):
Well what was it before that?

Speaker 8 (54:26):
All right, listen, Don, I could use my right name,
but how would it sound if I said Jeelo? Again,
this is Radcliffe Montague talking.

Speaker 4 (54:35):
Who would believe it?

Speaker 18 (54:36):
Nobody had walk Egan?

Speaker 8 (54:39):
All right, Don, Just for that last remark, when you
hang your stocking up this Christmas, don't expect it to
be too bulky unless your leg is in it.

Speaker 19 (54:51):
If you get what I mean.

Speaker 8 (54:52):
Why Jack Benny, don't tell me you're not going to
give done at Christmas present this year just because of
an innocent little remark like that.

Speaker 29 (55:00):
Why Jack, that doesn't sound like you.

Speaker 19 (55:04):
It doesn't.

Speaker 8 (55:06):
Well, Dick, you know I've been kidded a lot about
being thrifty and not over generous, but you.

Speaker 24 (55:11):
Can believe me.

Speaker 8 (55:11):
It's nothing but malicious slander.

Speaker 30 (55:13):
Oh it is?

Speaker 8 (55:13):
Eh, Yeah, you know how those things are, Dick. Once
the story spread that the fella's tight, it's very difficult.

Speaker 43 (55:19):
To live it down, especially when you live up to it.

Speaker 19 (55:21):
Yes, not for it.

Speaker 8 (55:22):
Hey, wait, if I'm gonna be called cheap, I can
stay on my own show where I can lie my
way out of it. In the first place, I came
up here just to see Mary Martin.

Speaker 6 (55:33):
You did. What about Jack?

Speaker 8 (55:35):
About the premiere of our picture? I wanted to help
me get it set for walk Keegan, Say, that's the
picture you and Mary made with Fred Allen, isn't it. Oh,
that's the picture we made in spite of allan boy,
what I am? He is the way he tries to
steal every scene. Oh well, Jack, I worked in the
picture with Fred Allen once and he never tried to steal.

Speaker 29 (55:52):
Anything from me.

Speaker 19 (55:53):
He didn't they No.

Speaker 8 (55:54):
In fact, he was very considerate. Whenever I did a
comedy bit. Fred would turn his back to the camera. Well,
he did the same thing with me, only didn't have
his pants on.

Speaker 19 (56:09):
He and his Creton shorts.

Speaker 8 (56:12):
You know, Dick, he wants the premiere of our picture
held in Old Orchard, Maine.

Speaker 24 (56:16):
Say Jack, I've got an idea.

Speaker 8 (56:18):
What is it, Meredith?

Speaker 24 (56:19):
Why don't you hold the premiere in Mason City?

Speaker 19 (56:21):
Mason City?

Speaker 8 (56:22):
Why, well, that's my hometown. Why should we have it
in your hometown. You weren't even in the picture.

Speaker 29 (56:29):
That's it.

Speaker 24 (56:29):
I've got nothing to lose.

Speaker 8 (56:37):
Why, say, Don, where's Mary Martin?

Speaker 18 (56:38):
Well you should be hearing a minut about Jack.

Speaker 4 (56:40):
Meanwhile, sit down, Jack and have a cup of steaming
hot Maxwell House.

Speaker 18 (56:44):
Coffee with your jello.

Speaker 8 (56:45):
Boy, what a plug? Don, You're about to stuttle as
Olson and Johnson, and remind me to change that to
Appatt and Costello for the second show. So Mary ought
to be here too, Nate, Yes, Jack, sit down while
Meredith Wilson plays the number I just well listen to
a good orchestra for a change. Yeah, you said it?
What are you gonna play?

Speaker 6 (57:04):
Meredith?

Speaker 24 (57:05):
Brown eyes? Why are you blue?

Speaker 20 (57:07):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (57:07):
Stop that now?

Speaker 8 (57:09):
The next one on this show says I've got lovely
blue eyes will get a stare out of him for
the next ten minutes.

Speaker 18 (57:13):
Hey, Jack, here's Mary Martin.

Speaker 29 (57:15):
Mary, Here here's Jack?

Speaker 6 (57:17):
Why?

Speaker 22 (57:17):
Hello?

Speaker 24 (57:18):
Mary?

Speaker 45 (57:18):
Oh?

Speaker 39 (57:19):
Jack?

Speaker 36 (57:19):
How are you honey?

Speaker 8 (57:20):
I'm fine. You looks well, Mary, Oh kidding, you're a
sight for blue eyes, I mean sour eyes.

Speaker 6 (57:25):
Yes, sir, well.

Speaker 14 (57:26):
Jack, I'm certainly surprised to see you here.

Speaker 24 (57:29):
You are?

Speaker 39 (57:30):
Yes, isn't this dialogue right off the cob?

Speaker 38 (57:35):
Yeah?

Speaker 8 (57:35):
But Phil Harris is listening in and he'll think it's dynamite. Now, Look, Mary,
I came here to ask a favor of y'all. Want
you to help me out in a little matter about
our pictures?

Speaker 39 (57:44):
Ah, I'll be glad to Jack.

Speaker 30 (57:45):
What is it?

Speaker 14 (57:45):
Well?

Speaker 8 (57:46):
You know I want the premiere of the picture held
in walk Kegan, and Fred Allen wants it held in
his hometown, Old Orchard.

Speaker 17 (57:51):
Where's that?

Speaker 8 (57:53):
It's up in Maine.

Speaker 39 (57:53):
Oh, I know where Old Archard is. Where's walk Keggan?

Speaker 8 (58:00):
Listen, Mary, walk Kegan was walk Kegan when Old Orchard
was just a couple of stumps, and Alan was one
of them. But Mary, truthfully, don't you think that Old
Orchard is the wrong place to hold the premiere of
a picture as important as ours?

Speaker 39 (58:12):
I agree with you there, Jack one hundred percent.

Speaker 8 (58:14):
Are you gonna stick by me on this? We will
definitely not have it in Old Orchard? Yes, And we'll
have it in walk Kegan, Illinois.

Speaker 14 (58:20):
No, what I think it should be in my hometown,
weather Protextas Night.

Speaker 19 (58:28):
Mary, be reasonable.

Speaker 8 (58:29):
What's the population of Weatherford?

Speaker 34 (58:31):
Oh?

Speaker 14 (58:31):
About eighteen thousand head head?

Speaker 8 (58:35):
Mary, I'm talking about people, not cattle. How many people
have you gotten Weatherford?

Speaker 34 (58:39):
I don't know.

Speaker 14 (58:39):
We brand everybody, You brand everybody. Yes, my heart belongs
to Daddy, but my body belongs to b bar h.

Speaker 8 (58:51):
Well, listen, Mary, let's get this settled once and for all.
I'm not going to Old Orchard, Maine, and I'm not
going to weather Protextas. But Jack, you might be making
a mistake.

Speaker 24 (58:59):
Those punchers are wonderful people.

Speaker 40 (59:01):
If they like you, they'll give.

Speaker 24 (59:02):
You the shirts off their backs. Dick shirts.

Speaker 8 (59:04):
I've got oh guards full of them.

Speaker 24 (59:06):
What do I need with shirts with Jack?

Speaker 46 (59:08):
But Jack?

Speaker 19 (59:09):
Nothing.

Speaker 8 (59:09):
I'm gonna call the studio and this time I'm gonna
lay down the laws. I'm gonna get tough. It's either
walk Ketan or they're gonna lose me.

Speaker 39 (59:16):
Oh Jack, what before you do that? I'd I'd like
to talk to you a minute, all right?

Speaker 22 (59:21):
What it is?

Speaker 14 (59:22):
Well, Jack, I don't want to hurt you, and what
I'm going to say, but I want you to take
this in the spirit in which it skids is.

Speaker 43 (59:29):
Given Slary, what are you talking about?

Speaker 14 (59:31):
Well, I overheard a conversation today at Paramount between mister
le Baron and mister Freeman, and they yes, Well, Jack,
you've simply got to face back.

Speaker 36 (59:43):
I know you were a big.

Speaker 14 (59:44):
Star one what well two years ago you were on top.

Speaker 39 (59:48):
But you can't say there forever you had to start
slipping sometime. Everybody does.

Speaker 14 (59:54):
Everybody, yes, Jack, even the big ones.

Speaker 39 (59:58):
Well, you know how it is, and show business of
the public is sickle.

Speaker 14 (01:00:02):
Yesterday you were a star and today geez.

Speaker 39 (01:00:11):
Don't you see, Jack, you can't get tough?

Speaker 17 (01:00:13):
Now? Why don't you be.

Speaker 39 (01:00:14):
Satisfied to go along and make the best of things?

Speaker 8 (01:00:19):
Well, maybe you're right, Mary, maybe I shouldn't call them up.
The public is fickle, and every nickel counts, say and then,
and then, what's the difference of the premiere and hell

(01:00:44):
an old Orchard Maine or a walk Kegan or weather
for Texas?

Speaker 19 (01:00:49):
Say?

Speaker 8 (01:00:51):
You know, say, if those cor punchers like me, maybe
they'll give me the shirts off their backs. You know,
I can always use a few more shirts, after all, shirts,
ain't hey?

Speaker 39 (01:01:04):
What do you say, Jack?

Speaker 8 (01:01:06):
Well, Mary, I'm sure you're right, and I certainly appreciate
your cooperation. And you tell mister le Baron and mister
Freeman you get to see them, Tell them I'm going
home now and pack at any place they want. The
premiere is okay with me.

Speaker 14 (01:01:21):
Go on, Mary, goodbye, Jack, goodbye.

Speaker 8 (01:01:28):
He show business is funny. One day you're up and
the next day I'm down. One day you're working for
big money and the next day you're working for shirts.
If they like you, oh well, I still got my
blue eyes. Well that was very diplomatic, Mary, Are you

(01:01:57):
ready for a song?

Speaker 26 (01:01:58):
Now?

Speaker 6 (01:01:59):
Ready and willing ladies and gentlemen.

Speaker 8 (01:02:00):
From the prolific pen of Meredith Wilson comes another gem.
In collaboration with Charles Chaplin.

Speaker 19 (01:02:05):
He has written for the great dictator.

Speaker 8 (01:02:07):
And appealing song Falling Stars. Mary Martin sings it for
the first time, fall.

Speaker 34 (01:02:19):
Star, Heavenly Messmer Brawl, Warball, behind me, the Wall, long Allarall.

Speaker 36 (01:02:41):
I gladly would follow your bold from be.

Speaker 26 (01:02:47):
Into a lounge, hoppy, I find this Earth's bad and read.

Speaker 34 (01:03:00):
With all come long bar.

Speaker 36 (01:03:08):
By turn lob while you got some don.

Speaker 42 (01:03:26):
Longly to.

Speaker 36 (01:03:30):
I'll ride along with you. Oh oh, I kness the

(01:04:16):
sad and drey.

Speaker 17 (01:04:17):
Breath little.

Speaker 42 (01:04:21):
Long and for help.

Speaker 36 (01:04:25):
I turned to you, my boy.

Speaker 39 (01:04:30):
The body are about taking but.

Speaker 36 (01:04:34):
Someone long, I'll ride along.

Speaker 30 (01:04:45):
Oh you marry thank you.

Speaker 8 (01:05:03):
Then, now, with a magic touch of radio, we fansport
you all to the home of Baby Snookes.

Speaker 38 (01:05:13):
Well, Snokes, it's bedtime, Impdaddy.

Speaker 37 (01:05:16):
That's the same.

Speaker 38 (01:05:17):
You've got to go to bed by because everybody has
to sleep. It's impossible to burn the candle at both ends.

Speaker 39 (01:05:23):
Which candle?

Speaker 24 (01:05:25):
No candle.

Speaker 38 (01:05:25):
It's just an allegorical expression, like a Snokes say's nothing
to burn. When you hear of a person burning the
candle at both ends, he hasn't clearly got a candle,
and he's not.

Speaker 24 (01:05:36):
Burning either end.

Speaker 17 (01:05:38):
Is burning in the nail.

Speaker 38 (01:05:40):
No, it's just this symbolic phrase. I'll come on, You've
had a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner, You've played with your toys.
Now it's time to go to sleep.

Speaker 39 (01:05:48):
I want more, take more turkey, Yeah, from both ends.

Speaker 24 (01:05:55):
I'll look here, snakes. If you eat not a mouful
of turkey, you'll burst.

Speaker 38 (01:05:59):
Well, sir, you wait enough to fete an army. One
more piece and you're positively explode.

Speaker 5 (01:06:04):
Well, give me a piece and hid behind the door.

Speaker 24 (01:06:09):
No, no more turk. It will poison you.

Speaker 33 (01:06:13):
I want some poison.

Speaker 24 (01:06:16):
Don't try to bribe me. Come on, get your things. Please.
Here here's the wishful. You can have this.

Speaker 17 (01:06:26):
There's no taking on it.

Speaker 24 (01:06:28):
Well, you can make a wish with it.

Speaker 38 (01:06:29):
You take one in and I'll take the other, and
whoever gets the largest piece gets a wish. Come on, alright,
I'll go fine, now you can have whatever you wish for.

Speaker 24 (01:06:42):
Turn on, Yes, what did you wish for?

Speaker 6 (01:06:45):
More?

Speaker 17 (01:06:46):
Takey?

Speaker 24 (01:06:48):
Alright your little bluff. Now, I'll give you some more turkey.

Speaker 1 (01:06:51):
Yeah, give me some white meat.

Speaker 24 (01:06:53):
Yes, I'll give you some white meat.

Speaker 39 (01:06:55):
I don't like white meat.

Speaker 8 (01:06:57):
All right, then I'll give.

Speaker 24 (01:06:58):
You a dark meat.

Speaker 17 (01:07:00):
Not me.

Speaker 24 (01:07:02):
I haven't say what do you want? Holday, John, that's
enough nokes. I'm not gonna let you drive me crazy tonight.

Speaker 16 (01:07:09):
Why because this is one day of the year. I
don't want to have to spank you. It's Thanksgiving and
we should all be joyful after Thanksgiving comestays.

Speaker 22 (01:07:21):
You can't change the.

Speaker 24 (01:07:22):
Holidays around what holiday.

Speaker 38 (01:07:27):
People make holidays to celebrate big events. George Washington's birthday
is a holiday. Lincoln's birthday is a holiday.

Speaker 39 (01:07:33):
How did they get born on holidays?

Speaker 24 (01:07:36):
They didn't get born on holidays, are you yet?

Speaker 25 (01:07:39):
No?

Speaker 24 (01:07:40):
No, they were born on ordinary days.

Speaker 16 (01:07:42):
But they became so famous that people celebrate their birthdays
as holidays.

Speaker 38 (01:07:46):
Take George Washington for instance, m h. Why do people
celebrate his birthday and not mine?

Speaker 39 (01:07:51):
Because he never told a lie?

Speaker 38 (01:07:55):
No, because he was a famous president. And I'm just
a nonentity. I'm nothing at all.

Speaker 16 (01:08:03):
Just another drab, colorless human piece of blotsom.

Speaker 1 (01:08:09):
I think you wonderful guys.

Speaker 24 (01:08:12):
Thanks.

Speaker 16 (01:08:13):
Oh well, at any rate, people make these holidays and
we all celebrate it, and it gives little girls like
you a chance to stay home from school.

Speaker 37 (01:08:20):
Is that clear?

Speaker 39 (01:08:21):
It's clear that day? What green going to school tomorrow?

Speaker 22 (01:08:27):
Why not?

Speaker 1 (01:08:28):
Like I just made a.

Speaker 24 (01:08:29):
Holiday, You made a holiday.

Speaker 34 (01:08:32):
M h.

Speaker 39 (01:08:33):
What are you going to celebrate Mikey cataday?

Speaker 24 (01:08:36):
Oh that's ridiculous.

Speaker 16 (01:08:37):
A national holiday is only for a great events. What
did your pussy cat do that calls.

Speaker 24 (01:08:41):
For a holiday?

Speaker 41 (01:08:42):
Yeah?

Speaker 24 (01:08:43):
Six kids, Now, there's nothing remarkable about that.

Speaker 47 (01:08:47):
Could you do it?

Speaker 24 (01:08:50):
Alice?

Speaker 38 (01:08:51):
And I'm trying to explain to you that a national
holiday must be some great occasion like Thanksgiving days.

Speaker 24 (01:08:57):
What well, if you get undressed and get into I'll
tell you the whole story by.

Speaker 6 (01:09:03):
How to begin with?

Speaker 16 (01:09:04):
Some states celebrate Thanksgiving a week earlier than others.

Speaker 8 (01:09:07):
Why.

Speaker 24 (01:09:09):
I don't know. You'll have to ask the president. Oh,
I'm not Dad, No, not now. Thanksgiving. It used to
be the last Thursday of November. That's today. When the
Pilgrims landed in America.

Speaker 1 (01:09:19):
They landed last Thursday.

Speaker 22 (01:09:20):
Ye can see them?

Speaker 38 (01:09:25):
Why because they're all dead. They started out for America
over three hundred years ago.

Speaker 1 (01:09:30):
Can they just got here last.

Speaker 24 (01:09:33):
No, they didn't get here last Thursday.

Speaker 16 (01:09:36):
They got here in sixteen, in seventeen sixty. It was
over three hundred years ago that their rise, the Pilgrims.
So now we celebrate their arrival by killing a turkey,
and everybody's supposed.

Speaker 39 (01:09:49):
To be thankful the turkey.

Speaker 24 (01:09:50):
Kill The turkeys don't know about Thanksgiving.

Speaker 16 (01:09:54):
We use the turkey as a symbol because that's the
first food the Pilgrims found. Albums the people who first
came here they landed on Plymouth Rock. The Cake, No,
the Pilgrims on Plymouth Rock. Who he who's he Plymouth Rock?

Speaker 24 (01:10:13):
The rock they landed on.

Speaker 17 (01:10:14):
Who did the rock.

Speaker 24 (01:10:15):
Land on the rock? Didn't land on anybody? They landed
on the rock.

Speaker 30 (01:10:20):
The Pilgrims.

Speaker 24 (01:10:25):
Because they've been traveling on the ocean for over six
weeks and they were travel the Pilgrims.

Speaker 38 (01:10:33):
That's why they were happy when they landed at Plymouth Rock.

Speaker 16 (01:10:36):
That's over three hundred years ago. The name of the
boat was the Mayflower.

Speaker 1 (01:10:40):
The uism gay.

Speaker 38 (01:10:43):
Oh, of course not do I look that old? Well,
I wasn't with them, but I'm proud to say, my
poor fathers weren't did you have? Certainly everybody has four fathers?

Speaker 17 (01:10:59):
Maypo? Where's three?

Speaker 24 (01:11:03):
Oh, don't start that.

Speaker 38 (01:11:05):
I'm talking about my ancestors, My poor bears.

Speaker 1 (01:11:08):
Your ancisted had for dad?

Speaker 36 (01:11:12):
How many beds you?

Speaker 24 (01:11:15):
My uncle didn't have any bears.

Speaker 38 (01:11:17):
Nobody had any bears. My ancestors were my paw bears. Understand, understand, Well,
what do I mean?

Speaker 1 (01:11:24):
Your aunt hat boy? And they were all day.

Speaker 24 (01:11:30):
Yeah, that's right.

Speaker 29 (01:11:31):
Now, I'll go to sleep.

Speaker 24 (01:11:34):
Not if you're going to keep interrupting me, will you
be quiet? All right?

Speaker 16 (01:11:40):
After the Pilgrims landed on the rock, they went and
found a clearing in the woods. They built cabins, but
pretty soon all their food supplies gave out. They were
about to starve when one of the pilgrims rushed in
with a thing, we all eat now for Thanksgiving.

Speaker 37 (01:11:53):
Do you know what that was?

Speaker 17 (01:11:54):
Uh?

Speaker 24 (01:11:54):
Huh, you're wrong. Could it be possible? You don't know
where Plymouth Rock is? Could that be?

Speaker 22 (01:12:04):
Could well?

Speaker 38 (01:12:05):
I guess that makes you the only that's really a distinctive.

Speaker 24 (01:12:11):
You're incredible. Why Plymouth Rock is in? Don't they can
do anything?

Speaker 32 (01:12:17):
And I've broken down school.

Speaker 6 (01:12:21):
It hasn't made or denver.

Speaker 22 (01:12:23):
One of those different days anyway, It doesn't matter.

Speaker 8 (01:12:30):
I'll pay your.

Speaker 5 (01:12:31):
Prayer all right, Yeah, and do money tun from my
wonderful daddy on my money to my old money and
to all the plases s, and I hope all the poor.

Speaker 1 (01:12:47):
Old dare plemotron doesn't do no.

Speaker 6 (01:12:52):
Putting.

Speaker 5 (01:12:53):
You do things make ten rock and I at home.

Speaker 24 (01:12:58):
Quite good? What kind of a crazy once again?

Speaker 41 (01:13:02):
It was yesterday not.

Speaker 5 (01:13:03):
To night about time?

Speaker 48 (01:13:05):
Kid?

Speaker 24 (01:13:06):
Yeah, that's wrapping.

Speaker 22 (01:13:19):
The summer which just about ties off and other sections.

Speaker 8 (01:13:22):
So there's a big Powell once again things.

Speaker 6 (01:13:24):
Good night for the game, and thanks for listening.

Speaker 22 (01:13:27):
For another half hour.

Speaker 18 (01:13:28):
If I'm going to keep the die out that might
probably are un.

Speaker 4 (01:13:31):
Next Thursday Night list is gone, well bedaying good night
and good luck for the make of the Mic full House,
the coffee That's good to the last draw.

Speaker 6 (01:13:38):
This is the National Broadcasting Company.

Speaker 7 (01:13:42):
Apologies for those past couple of minutes of the show
that it just kind of went to heck in the handbasket,
didn't it. Yeah, The Maxwell House, Coffee Time, Dick Powell,
Jack Benny, the Mary uh uh, Mary Martin and the
whole crew there uh for eighty five years ago. Today
here on Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Cox. Thanks for

(01:14:06):
being with us on this Friday. Our Saturday show will
feature a couple of episodes programs with Harold Perry in it.
We'll have the Great Guilderslee from nineteen forty two in
the Thanksgiving Show, and then once Harold left CBS thinking

(01:14:26):
that Guildersleeve would come with him and didn't, he made
his own show, The Harold Perry Show from nineteen fifty
We'll also have serious stuff with Doctor Christian starring Geene
Herscheld and the Prelude to Thanksgiving and Tarzan from nineteen
fifty one. The Story of the African Thanksgiving. Sunday and

(01:14:47):
Monday we'll have episodes of the Good News Program. We'll
have the nineteen thirty thirty nine edition from nineteen exees
me try that again, the nineteen forty edition from nineteen
thirty nine come the Pilgrims along with the Aldritch Family
starring Bobby Ellis, and a nineteen forty one edition of
the Jack Benny Program Thanksgiving Dinner at Jack's House. And

(01:15:11):
then on Monday we'll have the nineteen thirty nine edition
of Good News from nineteen thirty eight. The Andy Hardy
movie cast will be on hand, along with Steve dunnin
Sam Spade, Detective in the Terrifying Turkey Caper and Points
Sublimes starring Cliff Arquette and Mel Blank. On Tuesday, Bud
Abbott and Luke Costello and a Thanksgiving show a Hallmark

(01:15:34):
Playhouse from nineteen forty eight Freeland with Martha Scott and
Jack Kirkwood, and the New Edgar Bergen Hour with Charlie McCarthy.
On Wednesday, Father Knows Best, a Thanksgiving show, a Jimmy
Duranty show where Arthur Treecher tries to rapple off Jimmy
Duranty's Turkey uncle Dennis, visits Fibber and Molly, and Thanksgiving

(01:15:56):
at Mary's House on The Jack Benny Show from nineteen
forty four. Thursday, Thanksgiving Day is the day in which
Classic Radio left Hollywood for New York City. We'll hear
an episode of Casey Crime Photographer, a Thanksgiving show of that,
but then we'll have episodes FI. We'll have an episode
of Suspense, and then the final episodes of Have Gun

(01:16:19):
Will Travel and Gun Smoke and Yours Truly Johnny Dollar
with Bob Bailey's final performance as the man with the
action packed expense account. A week from today, Looks Presents
Hollywood an episode of Ke episode entitled Key Largo, adaptation
of that motion picture starring Edward g. Robinson from nineteen

(01:16:41):
forty nine, Adventures of Sam Spade and this time the
Adventures of Sam Spade starring Howard Duff because it's from
nineteen forty eight, and the Quarter Eagle Taper, and then
the Theater of Romance Intermetso that's all coming up the
week ahead here on Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Coos.
Coming up next, Jack Benny will be back in his

(01:17:04):
own show.

Speaker 2 (01:17:15):
If you were planning a new building, the architect can
make inexpensive changes in his design to shield against the
dangers of radio active full out. This technique is called
design slanting, which simply means designing for added fallout protection
without adversely affecting the use, appearance, or cost of a building.

(01:17:36):
To learn more about slanting, contact your local civil defense director.

Speaker 7 (01:17:41):
Okay, Now an episode of the Jack Benny Program, as
we get ready for Thanksgiving, Here yet another turkey from Jack.
This from eyighty two years ago, November twenty first, nineteen
forty three, as Jack dreams He's a turkey.

Speaker 4 (01:17:56):
The Great Nuts and Great Nuts Play program starring Jack
Bennet with Mary Livingston, Filarius Dynas Day, Rochester and Yours
truly Don Wilson one or forty years A favorite that
spells grape nuts, Yes, sir. Back in the days when

(01:18:18):
sweet Rosy or Grady was a favorite of the family,
Harmonium delicious, moy rich, grape nuts were a favorite at
the family breakfast table, and they still are.

Speaker 18 (01:18:26):
And there's a reason.

Speaker 4 (01:18:27):
Grape nuts have a distinctive sweet as a nut flavor
that makes for real eating fun in the morning. A
flavor that's delicious two brain blend of sun ripe and
wheat and molded barley. And today you can enjoy that
one delicious flavor in two delicious forms grape nuts crisp
crunchy kernels and grape nuts flakes delicate toasty brown plates.

Speaker 18 (01:18:48):
And both grape nuts and grape nuts flates.

Speaker 4 (01:18:50):
Bring you a central whole brain nourishment, which makes them
basic seven foods one type of food. Uncle Sam wants
you to eat more of because they're nourishing, plentiful, not
rac So freak your family the mardy grape nuts or
grape nuts blakes in the morning every morning.

Speaker 18 (01:19:05):
It's a mighty swell way to start on. Ladies and gentlemen.

Speaker 4 (01:19:43):
It's four days before Thanksgiving, and this year, as every year,
Jack Benny will entertain his friends on the holidays. So
yesterday Jack and Mary went shopping and we picked them
up now on the local market.

Speaker 30 (01:19:56):
Well home, swell.

Speaker 8 (01:19:57):
Let me, I'm giving a thanks Giving dinner and I'd
like enough turkey for uh. Let's see, there's me, Mary,
phil Alice, Dennis, Mister Billingsley, Mark Hellinger, the Warner Brothers,
and my laundry man. I'd like enough turkey for.

Speaker 33 (01:20:18):
Nine, Jack, didn't you invite Don Wilson?

Speaker 49 (01:20:21):
Oh?

Speaker 8 (01:20:21):
Yes, got enough for fifteen? Is that the metal doing?

Speaker 24 (01:20:30):
Oh? Jack?

Speaker 33 (01:20:31):
John doesn't eat so much?

Speaker 8 (01:20:32):
He doesn't he remember last time I threw a big party. Yeah, well,
don ate more than he chipped in for it, don't sir?

Speaker 6 (01:20:43):
Tell me?

Speaker 30 (01:20:44):
Hello, folks are other people waiting, So let's get on
with the transaction.

Speaker 19 (01:20:48):
Oh yes, yes, of course.

Speaker 30 (01:20:49):
Now here's a nice turkey, all dressed and everything.

Speaker 8 (01:20:52):
Fifty five Well, I fully expected to pay that much.

Speaker 19 (01:20:58):
A pond, yes, pound, Hm, that's right.

Speaker 30 (01:21:03):
And this turkey weighs twenty one pounds hm.

Speaker 50 (01:21:09):
And you'll need at least twenty one pounds to feed
fifteen people.

Speaker 19 (01:21:12):
Fifty five cents a pound.

Speaker 8 (01:21:15):
That's a pretty big turkey. And I don't want any
left over. How about that one over there that's a pigeon?

Speaker 19 (01:21:22):
Oh oh oh oh, well.

Speaker 8 (01:21:31):
Then I'll take that other one, that live one right there.

Speaker 30 (01:21:34):
I'm sorry, I'm not selling my canary.

Speaker 8 (01:21:39):
A canary. Well, anyway, that wouldn't be enough for fifteen people.

Speaker 30 (01:21:44):
Whatever, not unless you just wanted to entertain.

Speaker 33 (01:21:52):
He's got his violin for that.

Speaker 8 (01:21:54):
Yeah, gee, Mary, look at those turkeys laying there so cold,
and still just think a few days ago they were happy,
carefree and gay. And now now they're fifty five cents
a pound. I mean, now they're dead, Say Butcher, how

(01:22:15):
old were these.

Speaker 19 (01:22:16):
Turkeys when they were killed?

Speaker 30 (01:22:17):
All about eight months?

Speaker 19 (01:22:20):
Didn't even have a chance to know life. I feel terrible.

Speaker 33 (01:22:25):
You feel a lot worse if they were seventy cents
a pound.

Speaker 48 (01:22:28):
I suppose, though, But.

Speaker 8 (01:22:30):
Mary, when I see that turkey laying there like that,
I can't help her think of its mother.

Speaker 19 (01:22:34):
How lonesome she must be.

Speaker 50 (01:22:36):
Don't worry, Bud, that's her right next to her. Oh,
I wish you'd hurry, mister. All these people waiting.

Speaker 1 (01:22:42):
On sadden me how timing?

Speaker 48 (01:22:44):
Will you please give me the little cyrus?

Speaker 30 (01:22:48):
Oh, it's missus Greenberg. What can I do for you? Susan?

Speaker 16 (01:22:56):
Go ahead, Butcher, you can wait on her. I'm trying
to make up my mind. Between these two.

Speaker 33 (01:23:00):
Turkeys, I'll lay eighty five on the pigeon.

Speaker 19 (01:23:03):
Never mind, tell me.

Speaker 33 (01:23:05):
Tommy, how much weighs.

Speaker 28 (01:23:07):
By you the tyke kiss.

Speaker 8 (01:23:08):
They weigh from eighteen to twenty two pounds.

Speaker 33 (01:23:10):
Twenty two pounds You called dish a turkey.

Speaker 30 (01:23:14):
Well that's the average size.

Speaker 33 (01:23:16):
Listen, Tommy, last Thanksgiving, I had a turkey that raped
a the six.

Speaker 22 (01:23:21):
Pounds I ray the month shout eighty six pounds.

Speaker 41 (01:23:25):
Yes, And on the other side of the.

Speaker 1 (01:23:27):
Car that said you will meet a pall dark.

Speaker 8 (01:23:29):
Man eighty six pounds. Why that must have been a humdinger.

Speaker 33 (01:23:38):
I'm not talking to you.

Speaker 50 (01:23:43):
Oh, pardon me, missus Spreenberg. How I am I taking
two of these turkeys?

Speaker 8 (01:23:47):
How much I'll they a fifty five.

Speaker 19 (01:23:49):
Cents a pound?

Speaker 22 (01:23:50):
I'm not asking you.

Speaker 19 (01:23:55):
Oh, oh, excuse me.

Speaker 24 (01:23:57):
All right, Tommy, give it this one here and I'll
pick it that light say.

Speaker 51 (01:24:00):
Goodbye, good bye, goodbye, aye, goodbye, social climber.

Speaker 30 (01:24:14):
What what what's she mad at?

Speaker 17 (01:24:17):
Well?

Speaker 33 (01:24:18):
Jack, I guess that'll teach you to mind your own.

Speaker 16 (01:24:20):
I'm not talking to you, say butcher, butcher, I've been
thinking it over.

Speaker 8 (01:24:27):
Instead of taking one of these dress turkeys, I'll buy
a live one.

Speaker 19 (01:24:30):
How much is it eight dollars?

Speaker 30 (01:24:32):
Are you gonna take it with you? Yes, that'll be
twenty cents exter for the leech, Oh, I off.

Speaker 8 (01:24:40):
Wondered how they got them home? Now, let's see what
else do I want?

Speaker 17 (01:24:44):
Oh?

Speaker 19 (01:24:44):
Yes, for dinner tonight?

Speaker 16 (01:24:46):
Say butcher, have you got a nice thick, juicy tea
bone steak?

Speaker 52 (01:24:51):
What was that?

Speaker 8 (01:24:53):
I said, a nice t bone steak?

Speaker 30 (01:25:05):
Well, who's next?

Speaker 8 (01:25:12):
Listen, butcher. You don't have to go into convulsions just
because I'm right.

Speaker 16 (01:25:17):
Folks, gets your tickets here for the forty cent tour
through the Refrigerator. Come one, Come on, hurry, hurry, hooray, forty.

Speaker 19 (01:25:25):
Cent tour through the refrigerator.

Speaker 16 (01:25:27):
Yes, sir, it used to be forty five, but the
oldta put a.

Speaker 19 (01:25:30):
Ceiling on it. Very funny.

Speaker 25 (01:25:32):
Oh thank you there now hurry, houray, hurray.

Speaker 24 (01:25:36):
On this outstanding excursion.

Speaker 16 (01:25:38):
You will see ribsteaks, drump steaks, hip steaks, tee bone sirloin, tenderloin,
and porter house the seven wonders of the world.

Speaker 33 (01:25:50):
Come on, Jack, let's take the tour.

Speaker 8 (01:25:52):
Oh don't be silly, Mary. You've seen steaks before. I
showed you some last night when it came over to
my house.

Speaker 33 (01:25:57):
Oh, you and your etchings, they weren't that chings.

Speaker 16 (01:26:02):
All right, folks, all of you are going on this tour.

Speaker 25 (01:26:05):
Please form a.

Speaker 17 (01:26:05):
Line to VlaP car.

Speaker 33 (01:26:06):
Come on, Jack, this for it.

Speaker 16 (01:26:08):
Bye, two tickets all right, all right, okay, folks, line
up in front of this refrigerator door.

Speaker 30 (01:26:14):
I'll quiet everybody. Yeah, whoever, it's okay, Joe, you can
open up.

Speaker 33 (01:26:36):
Gosh, it's chilly in this refrigerator.

Speaker 19 (01:26:39):
Yeah, sure is.

Speaker 16 (01:26:40):
And now, ladies and gentlemen, if you will look to
the right, you will see one of our feature attractions,
none other than a seven rib roast.

Speaker 8 (01:26:48):
Oh see, Marriott, it is beautiful. I wonder if I
could jump.

Speaker 30 (01:26:58):
Don't linger with your finger.

Speaker 8 (01:27:01):
I just wanted to.

Speaker 19 (01:27:01):
See if it was tender.

Speaker 16 (01:27:03):
Yes, ladies and gentlemen, that's seven rebrookes, not five, not six?

Speaker 24 (01:27:07):
What seven?

Speaker 16 (01:27:08):
I'll count them for Youard one two three four five
m one two three fall? But oh hey, Joe locked
the doors. Okay, Hey, hey, blot the window.

Speaker 22 (01:27:20):
Okay, hey, time down the alarm.

Speaker 16 (01:27:23):
Okay, hey, stop right, start with that.

Speaker 8 (01:27:26):
Nobody stole anything. Come on, Mary, let's pick up our.

Speaker 30 (01:27:30):
Turkey and go home.

Speaker 19 (01:28:30):
Well, we're always home, Mary.

Speaker 30 (01:28:32):
Yeah, isn't she cute?

Speaker 19 (01:28:40):
Say Marry, you think.

Speaker 8 (01:28:41):
It's all right to take the turkey in the house?

Speaker 17 (01:28:43):
Why not?

Speaker 33 (01:28:44):
She's gonna be your guest for Thanksgiving? What she can
sit between the crandry sauce and the mashed potatoes.

Speaker 25 (01:28:50):
Oh?

Speaker 33 (01:28:50):
Stop, look, Jack, here comes your crazy border. Mister Billingsley.

Speaker 24 (01:28:54):
Marry.

Speaker 8 (01:28:54):
He's not crazy, he's just a little eccentric, that's all.
I'll be nice to him as wrench do tomorrow.

Speaker 19 (01:28:59):
Hello, mister Billingsley, Hello folks.

Speaker 18 (01:29:01):
Not for a stroll?

Speaker 25 (01:29:03):
I see, well we're.

Speaker 8 (01:29:12):
Uh, we're not exactly taking a stroll.

Speaker 29 (01:29:19):
Why why, mister Penny, I.

Speaker 18 (01:29:22):
Didn't know you had a little one.

Speaker 33 (01:29:31):
Mister Benny's little one happens to be a turkey.

Speaker 29 (01:29:34):
You may be surprised, but I'm not.

Speaker 8 (01:29:37):
Look, mister Billingsley, I'm trying to tell you that we
bought this at a store. Oh come now, mister Benny.

Speaker 30 (01:29:43):
I'm old enough.

Speaker 8 (01:29:47):
Oh brother, Look look, mister Billingsley, we're in a hurry.

Speaker 48 (01:29:53):
It's oh am, I I have to go to the
barber shop?

Speaker 6 (01:29:55):
Or was I there?

Speaker 29 (01:29:57):
Isn't that funny? I don't know whether I'm coming or going?

Speaker 16 (01:30:00):
And you can say that again, okay, and I all right,
I don't know whether I'm coming or.

Speaker 48 (01:30:08):
Well.

Speaker 24 (01:30:08):
I must run along now goodbye, mister Benny.

Speaker 19 (01:30:11):
Goodbye.

Speaker 30 (01:30:12):
I believe you would you rascal?

Speaker 19 (01:30:24):
Well then I know isn't in there.

Speaker 8 (01:30:31):
Well let's let's go.

Speaker 48 (01:30:36):
Mary.

Speaker 33 (01:30:38):
You know Jack, I don't see how you can stand
having a guy like that around the house.

Speaker 8 (01:30:42):
Mister billings Oh he's all right. He gets his own meals,
makes his own bed, and every morning he gets up
at six o'clock and takes my.

Speaker 19 (01:30:49):
Dog for a walk.

Speaker 33 (01:30:50):
But Jack, you haven't got a dog, So for.

Speaker 19 (01:30:52):
Heaven's sake, don't tell Billingsley. It will break his heart.
Well here we are. Come on, Mary, we'll put the
turkey in the kitchen.

Speaker 8 (01:31:10):
O hollo, Rochester, Boss home is living.

Speaker 24 (01:31:21):
Well?

Speaker 6 (01:31:21):
And hold you.

Speaker 8 (01:31:24):
Now, let's see where can we put the turkey?

Speaker 18 (01:31:29):
Rochester, what are you doing to that turkey?

Speaker 48 (01:31:31):
I'm only petting the horse.

Speaker 8 (01:31:34):
Pappner, you got your fingers around her neck.

Speaker 18 (01:31:36):
What are you worried about?

Speaker 30 (01:31:37):
I ain't hurting the pot.

Speaker 38 (01:31:38):
You'll get.

Speaker 19 (01:31:48):
The way the way some people treat turkeys. Come the area,
you poor thing.

Speaker 6 (01:31:56):
There there?

Speaker 8 (01:31:58):
See See how she looks at me with those rusting eyes.

Speaker 19 (01:32:01):
See how can anyone kill it?

Speaker 33 (01:32:02):
Oh, Jack, don't be a hypocris.

Speaker 19 (01:32:04):
I'm not a hypoget.

Speaker 8 (01:32:05):
I just can't bear the thought of anyone killing a poor,
defenseless turkey.

Speaker 33 (01:32:09):
Go on, last year you killed one yourself, Mary, I ran.

Speaker 8 (01:32:12):
Over that turkey with my car.

Speaker 19 (01:32:14):
There was an accident.

Speaker 17 (01:32:15):
Accident.

Speaker 33 (01:32:16):
You turn off the road and chase her halfway up
a mountain. Oh, she hadn't stopped to lay an egg.

Speaker 32 (01:32:23):
She live to hatchet.

Speaker 19 (01:32:26):
What are you talking about?

Speaker 24 (01:32:27):
You're right, miss Lives And then he put the car reversion,
got too mabirds.

Speaker 52 (01:32:31):
What I don't know.

Speaker 30 (01:32:33):
I was a tail dinner.

Speaker 8 (01:32:37):
Rochester.

Speaker 16 (01:32:38):
That's the first time I ever had white meat with
firestone written on it. I'll cut that out.

Speaker 19 (01:32:47):
Let's drop the whole thing. I'll get a rocheter. Somebody
at the door.

Speaker 8 (01:32:52):
You go out and feed the turkey. Yeah, doom boom,
Hello Dennis, mister, what are you doing around this way?

Speaker 34 (01:33:02):
Kid?

Speaker 29 (01:33:02):
I came to see you about something important?

Speaker 3 (01:33:05):
Oh?

Speaker 25 (01:33:05):
Yeah, what is it?

Speaker 19 (01:33:08):
Well, well it's about me, all right, Dennis, all right?

Speaker 45 (01:33:14):
What is it?

Speaker 48 (01:33:16):
Well?

Speaker 6 (01:33:17):
Well?

Speaker 25 (01:33:17):
What well?

Speaker 29 (01:33:20):
My mother told me to tell you.

Speaker 18 (01:33:23):
Well, your mother told you to tell me what.

Speaker 29 (01:33:26):
Well, you've been giving me the same salary for three years, and.

Speaker 16 (01:33:29):
Never year you promised me a rage. My mother thinks
I ought to get one, and I do too.

Speaker 17 (01:33:32):
So there, dinnis.

Speaker 30 (01:33:41):
Dennis come back here?

Speaker 25 (01:33:43):
Where'd he go?

Speaker 33 (01:33:44):
He thought he ran outside, but he went into the closet.

Speaker 8 (01:33:48):
What a kid, Dennis, Come here, she is crowded out there.
Those are my sues now, Dennis, if you want a
raisin salary, don't act so flustered.

Speaker 16 (01:33:58):
I just ask me, like a man, what are you
afraid of? Just come over to me and say, mister Benny,
i'd like a rais and salary.

Speaker 29 (01:34:06):
Well, Dennis, I'd like to give you a raise, kid,
but right now I can't afford it.

Speaker 26 (01:34:18):
Huh.

Speaker 29 (01:34:19):
I'm sorry. Things are a little tough now.

Speaker 8 (01:34:21):
What fuck up?

Speaker 25 (01:34:23):
Kid?

Speaker 29 (01:34:23):
Stick to me and you'll go play.

Speaker 33 (01:34:26):
Dennis Jannis, where'd you learn that?

Speaker 29 (01:34:29):
Mister Benny? Put it on the record and send it
to me for my birthday.

Speaker 16 (01:34:36):
Then, as we'll talk about your salary right after Thanksgiving.

Speaker 29 (01:34:40):
It wasn't even my birthday never mind.

Speaker 53 (01:34:43):
By the way, kid, what are you gonna sing on.

Speaker 19 (01:34:44):
The program tomorrow?

Speaker 29 (01:34:45):
Say a prayer for the boys over there?

Speaker 8 (01:34:47):
Well, let me hear it. Okay, maybe I ought to
give him a raise. It costs money to make those records,
you know.

Speaker 26 (01:35:10):
O pread for.

Speaker 47 (01:35:17):
When they play the Star Spangled Battle, picture them by
the Gonlief line.

Speaker 30 (01:35:34):
And the Lord to watch from them.

Speaker 34 (01:35:41):
Not.

Speaker 42 (01:35:47):
Your as you smile when they play the Spangled as all.

Speaker 36 (01:36:06):
Fred on the.

Speaker 17 (01:36:28):
Over the.

Speaker 36 (01:36:31):
Overgad say a pair for.

Speaker 30 (01:36:34):
The boys over there, over.

Speaker 24 (01:36:40):
Over the.

Speaker 36 (01:36:42):
Say a boy over.

Speaker 19 (01:36:45):
The live your.

Speaker 47 (01:36:51):
You tie and ride when they play the.

Speaker 51 (01:37:00):
Aad that us denis that song as swell?

Speaker 8 (01:37:43):
Run over it once more before the broadcast tomorrow.

Speaker 29 (01:37:46):
Okay, but what shall I tell my mother about my
Raisin salary?

Speaker 33 (01:37:49):
Just tell her you asked. She'll know the rest.

Speaker 8 (01:37:52):
Dennis, tell your mother. We'll talk about it later.

Speaker 33 (01:37:54):
Okay, good bias, lets goodbye Dennis, Goodbye kids.

Speaker 19 (01:37:58):
Dennis.

Speaker 30 (01:37:59):
That's the closet.

Speaker 19 (01:38:00):
Oh, here's the front door.

Speaker 29 (01:38:03):
There he no wonder you're the star.

Speaker 19 (01:38:08):
Yes, Dennis, I've been a big hit for years. Just
opening doors.

Speaker 30 (01:38:12):
Goodbye kid.

Speaker 19 (01:38:14):
I wonder when he'll grow up.

Speaker 33 (01:38:16):
Well, Jack, I think i'll go home too.

Speaker 8 (01:38:17):
I have to clean up the house, clean up your house.

Speaker 19 (01:38:20):
You've got a.

Speaker 54 (01:38:21):
Maid, I know, but I don't want to lose her.

Speaker 32 (01:38:23):
Oh yeah, good night Mary, goodnight.

Speaker 16 (01:38:29):
A Rochester.

Speaker 8 (01:38:30):
Yes, sir, I'm ready to go upstairs to bed.

Speaker 26 (01:38:33):
I'm tired.

Speaker 25 (01:38:34):
Boys.

Speaker 24 (01:38:34):
Would you mind walking up tonight?

Speaker 19 (01:38:43):
Okay, then don't let it happen too often?

Speaker 16 (01:38:49):
Rochester, what did you do with the turkey? Did you
put her where she won't be cold.

Speaker 30 (01:38:54):
Yes, the good.

Speaker 18 (01:38:57):
Okay, put her in the oven?

Speaker 30 (01:39:01):
The oven? What'd you put her there for? I don't
want to get staked, but I don't thankgiving.

Speaker 18 (01:39:09):
Take her out of there and put her on the
back part.

Speaker 19 (01:39:11):
Okay, bad enough that we have to kill her in
a few days.

Speaker 30 (01:39:16):
At least we could do or see that she's comfortable.

Speaker 8 (01:39:22):
Yeah, I hate to think of killing that poor old turkey.

Speaker 30 (01:39:26):
Oh boy, am I tired?

Speaker 26 (01:39:34):
Uh?

Speaker 25 (01:39:35):
You're how tired?

Speaker 19 (01:39:36):
I can't even hang up my clothes? Oh well, hm,
I'm not so fat.

Speaker 55 (01:40:06):
It'll feel good to get these shoes off. Hm hm hm, Oh, darling,
I always forget.

Speaker 30 (01:40:27):
Thankscise me here again?

Speaker 8 (01:40:30):
Years roll out for everybody but the turkey.

Speaker 32 (01:40:35):
M Oh, hello, hello, my fine feathered friend.

Speaker 30 (01:41:21):
Say you're nice and loved, aren't you?

Speaker 24 (01:41:24):
Who me?

Speaker 30 (01:41:25):
Yes?

Speaker 24 (01:41:25):
You?

Speaker 30 (01:41:26):
You're going to make somebody happy on Thanksgiving?

Speaker 51 (01:41:30):
What and you'll bring me a nice price on the
market fifty five cents of down?

Speaker 8 (01:41:39):
What am I doing here in this coop?

Speaker 18 (01:41:42):
I'm not a turkey.

Speaker 8 (01:41:45):
I gotta get out of here.

Speaker 29 (01:41:46):
Let me out of here, Let me out of this cool.

Speaker 19 (01:41:52):
Oh, I'm not in a coop. I'm in my own house.

Speaker 18 (01:41:55):
A Rochester, Rochester.

Speaker 24 (01:41:57):
What are you doing here?

Speaker 18 (01:41:58):
Turkey?

Speaker 16 (01:41:58):
I put you out in the back.

Speaker 25 (01:42:00):
Porch, Turkey, Rochester.

Speaker 8 (01:42:02):
I'm not a Turkey, and stop.

Speaker 30 (01:42:05):
Staring at me like that.

Speaker 16 (01:42:07):
Come in, Turkey, come on into me, Rochester. We're doing
that knife from four?

Speaker 25 (01:42:15):
Is that an apku?

Speaker 17 (01:42:15):
You're wearing us around?

Speaker 36 (01:42:20):
Rochester?

Speaker 18 (01:42:20):
What's the matter with you?

Speaker 4 (01:42:21):
Okay?

Speaker 17 (01:42:22):
Butcher?

Speaker 30 (01:42:22):
Hello, Susan?

Speaker 17 (01:42:23):
How much ways by your disk? Turkey?

Speaker 48 (01:42:26):
Gobble gobble gobble gobbles.

Speaker 1 (01:42:27):
I'm not parking to you.

Speaker 19 (01:42:35):
Oh pardon me?

Speaker 16 (01:42:36):
All right, folks, get your ticket tear for the forty
cent tour through the gravy board. Come on, come on, hurry.

Speaker 33 (01:42:44):
Time, Jack, let's go. Two tickets please, you.

Speaker 30 (01:42:46):
Only need one. Lady turkeys get in free.

Speaker 18 (01:42:50):
Wait a minute, this is going far enough.

Speaker 25 (01:42:51):
I'm not a Turkey.

Speaker 8 (01:42:52):
I'll prove I'm not, missus Greenburg.

Speaker 30 (01:42:54):
I'm not turkinger Butcher.

Speaker 8 (01:42:58):
You know I'm not a turkey, don't you.

Speaker 30 (01:43:07):
What's the matter with you people?

Speaker 8 (01:43:08):
Very Tell him I'm not a turkey.

Speaker 30 (01:43:10):
Tell him for cranberry sauce.

Speaker 33 (01:43:12):
Tell him, of course, you're not a turkey. What's the
matter with your people?

Speaker 17 (01:43:18):
Look at his web?

Speaker 33 (01:43:19):
See why I've had enough I'm getting out of here.

Speaker 30 (01:43:30):
You're a turkey.

Speaker 19 (01:43:30):
You're a turkey.

Speaker 30 (01:43:31):
You're a turkey.

Speaker 19 (01:43:32):
Who's a turkey?

Speaker 30 (01:43:32):
You're a turkey. You're a turkey. You're a turkey.

Speaker 8 (01:43:34):
I'm a Turkey.

Speaker 30 (01:43:35):
Rama Brama sausa, Bramo sausa.

Speaker 42 (01:43:37):
Boat train leaving.

Speaker 16 (01:43:46):
On track well for Morocco Tunisia eshu al rabia. Oh boy,
I want to get on that train, get away from
all of this and Turkey.

Speaker 8 (01:43:55):
What that did it?

Speaker 29 (01:44:01):
I'm gonna prove once and for all.

Speaker 30 (01:44:02):
Who I am.

Speaker 29 (01:44:03):
Hello, mister Benny, you're a little unhappy I see.

Speaker 16 (01:44:06):
Mister billings Mister Billingsley, tell me, am I a Turkey
or Jack Benny.

Speaker 29 (01:44:11):
You haven't left yourself much choice, have you.

Speaker 25 (01:44:19):
This is the end.

Speaker 19 (01:44:20):
I'm not taking any more from anybody.

Speaker 16 (01:44:22):
The next one that tells me I'm a turkey is
going to get a punch in the mouth.

Speaker 8 (01:44:24):
That's what I'll do.

Speaker 17 (01:44:25):
I'll punch him right in the mouth.

Speaker 18 (01:44:27):
Hello Jack, never mind, not Jack stuff.

Speaker 8 (01:44:28):
I know what you're thinking.

Speaker 19 (01:44:29):
Don Wilson, go ahead and say it, just.

Speaker 30 (01:44:31):
Say it, of course, I'll say it.

Speaker 25 (01:44:33):
Rape.

Speaker 18 (01:44:33):
Let's flake, sir, toasty brown, toasty brown.

Speaker 25 (01:44:35):
Start you know what I mean?

Speaker 8 (01:44:37):
Come on say it, rich Don Wilson.

Speaker 16 (01:44:41):
You came here to tell me one thing?

Speaker 25 (01:44:43):
Are you saying?

Speaker 26 (01:44:44):
Off?

Speaker 25 (01:44:45):
Punch you?

Speaker 8 (01:44:45):
Right them up?

Speaker 19 (01:44:46):
Wake them up?

Speaker 24 (01:44:47):
Raakee DUTs plate, wake them up, rape, wake them up?

Speaker 16 (01:44:57):
Yet out, get out of here, everybody, get out, get out.

Speaker 22 (01:45:00):
Wah wa way go away.

Speaker 18 (01:45:02):
Whoah, wake up?

Speaker 22 (01:45:03):
You've been dreaming.

Speaker 30 (01:45:05):
Huh huh, why you've been dreaming?

Speaker 6 (01:45:11):
Yeah?

Speaker 16 (01:45:12):
Oh, my goodness, what a dream I had with a
terrible nightmare. It must have been bossing feathers all over
the floor, my feathers.

Speaker 18 (01:45:26):
You tore your pillar apart.

Speaker 30 (01:45:27):
Oh oh oh, oh you know what she.

Speaker 19 (01:45:31):
Meant for a minuitaire.

Speaker 8 (01:45:33):
Well, I'm all right now, Rochester, any time to get
up anyway almost.

Speaker 29 (01:45:38):
Hey, mister Barry, what's all that money doing on the floor.

Speaker 8 (01:45:41):
Oh that's some change that dropped out of my shoe.

Speaker 19 (01:45:45):
Go on, Rochester, come on, go on.

Speaker 2 (01:45:47):
Boss.

Speaker 19 (01:45:50):
Well man, he's got.

Speaker 48 (01:45:52):
Shoes that jingle jangles.

Speaker 44 (01:46:00):
Yeah, well, cost to night, I've gotta tell you.

Speaker 4 (01:46:02):
On so Soul starring, you know how you meet a
guy on a nice, tiny morning and sing out my hello, Jim,
how are you?

Speaker 18 (01:46:09):
And he says, oh, so salt.

Speaker 4 (01:46:11):
Well, there's usually a reason for that left down, so
sol moved and it goes something like this. So all
that guy got up that morning on the run. So
then he ate breakfast on the sip and runs. Oh no,
wonder he felt blow par lately. You can't do a
man's sized job and a bird sized breakfast. You know,
like doctors and dieticians tell us that we need at
least one quarter of our daily nourishment in the morning.

Speaker 18 (01:46:32):
So start today well nourished.

Speaker 4 (01:46:34):
And for a real treat, feature toasty brown grape nuts flakes,
because grape nuts flakes are a whole grain cereal crammed
full of sustaining energy, giving.

Speaker 18 (01:46:43):
Whole grain nourishment. So you couldn't ask for anything better.

Speaker 4 (01:46:47):
Because usan grape nuts flakes, Chris toasty brown with that
sweet as a nut flavor.

Speaker 18 (01:46:53):
Eat a good breakfast, you'll do a better job.

Speaker 4 (01:46:56):
And for a rousing breakfast treat, make it delicious nutritious
break nuts.

Speaker 8 (01:47:00):
Plays, Ladies and gentlemen, I only have a second.

Speaker 16 (01:47:02):
I'd like to call your attention to a special USO
program which will be broadcast Thanksgiving morning.

Speaker 19 (01:47:07):
Program is called Soldiers in Greece.

Speaker 8 (01:47:09):
Paint will include all of your favorite radio emotion motion
picture stars.

Speaker 19 (01:47:12):
So please listen. Goodnight, folks.

Speaker 6 (01:47:15):
Ladies.

Speaker 30 (01:47:16):
Your grocer has something new for you.

Speaker 56 (01:47:18):
That's the time saving money saving big new economy size
package of hot grape nuts wheatmeal thirty four ounces of
this rich hot brown serial that's extra delicious, extra nutritious,
and it cooks the perfection in just three minutes. Ask
for the big new economy size package of hot grape
nuts wheatmeal.

Speaker 19 (01:47:35):
This program came to you from Hollywood.

Speaker 18 (01:47:37):
This is a national broadcasting.

Speaker 7 (01:47:38):
Company eighty two years ago. November twenty first, nineteen forty three.
Jack Benny here on Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Cos.
If you want to support our podcasts and it's always
greatly appreciated, visit our web page Classicradio dot Stream. You
have a number of items aero available for purchase. You
can also find the links to professor Bees Digestive. If

(01:48:00):
you use the promo code wyat, you can save ten
percent and also a percentage goes to help us here
with the podcast Onlineprofbees dot com p r o f
b ees dot Com promo code Wyatt. You can also
use to buy me a copy function if you just
want to send us a little few shekels or so

(01:48:23):
every little bit is appreciated. Willard Waterman is up next
with an episode of The Great Guilders Sleeve.

Speaker 31 (01:48:36):
Here is basic information and guidance from the Office of
Civil Defense, Department of Defense, Washington. If the attack warning
signal sounds, go immediately to the nearest public fallout shelter
or a home shelter. But if none is available, you
might be able to improvise some protection against radioactive fallout.

(01:48:58):
It won't be as good as a permanent or pre
planned shelter, but any protection is better than none and
might be enough to save your life.

Speaker 7 (01:49:08):
We continue here on Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Talks
with an episode of The Great Guilder Sleeves starring the
second Guildy, Willard Waterman. This goes back seventy four years
to November twenty first, nineteen fifty one.

Speaker 20 (01:49:22):
The Craft Foods Company presents Willard Waterman as the Great
Guildess Leave. The Great Guildess Leave is brought to you

(01:49:44):
partially transcribed by the Craft Foods Company. Craft you know
makes Philadelphia brand cream cheese, the cream cheese that's been
famous for quality since eighteen eighty. Delicious Creamy White Philadelphia
Brand is so popular it outsells all other brands of
cream cheese combined.

Speaker 57 (01:50:03):
Enjoy it often.

Speaker 20 (01:50:05):
Just be sure you get genuine Philadelphia brand when you buy.
Look for the red Kraft k on the silvery package.
Remember there's only one Philadelphia brand cream cheese, and it's
made by craft and guaranteed fresh.

Speaker 25 (01:50:30):
Well, it's the evening before.

Speaker 20 (01:50:31):
Thanksgiving in the summerfield, like many other places, is blanketed
with snow. The great Guiltisley walked home through it as
part of his training for his bout with Old Tom
Turkey tomorrow. And we might add that the water commissioner
is in the pink of condition.

Speaker 52 (01:50:47):
Hello everybody, I'm home, my dree See that's a tantalizing
aroma coming from the kitchen.

Speaker 1 (01:50:55):
Ohhut, Birdie's cooking the turkey for tomorrow.

Speaker 19 (01:50:57):
Yeah, I think I'll go back and take a look
at it now, Unkie.

Speaker 17 (01:51:00):
Don't start sampling it tonight. I won't.

Speaker 19 (01:51:04):
That turkey isn't gonna get the best to me this time.
In fact, I planned to eat like like meat. Hello, Bertie,
even if HI asked me, Roy, what are you doing
over there by the oven?

Speaker 28 (01:51:18):
Me Leroy is watching the turkey and I'm watching, Leroy.

Speaker 19 (01:51:23):
He's a good idea.

Speaker 1 (01:51:24):
Donkey's here now, Bertie, you better double the watch.

Speaker 25 (01:51:27):
Yes, ma'am.

Speaker 28 (01:51:28):
Everybody stand back now.

Speaker 25 (01:51:29):
Bertie's going to base it.

Speaker 17 (01:51:32):
Uncle. He got a twenty four pound turkey.

Speaker 19 (01:51:35):
See, isn't he a whopper?

Speaker 17 (01:51:37):
Twenty four pounds and five of us to eat it?

Speaker 1 (01:51:39):
Oh boy, that's nearly five pounds apiece. Bronco and I
may not be here for dinner.

Speaker 17 (01:51:44):
Donkey.

Speaker 1 (01:51:45):
He's trying to get tickets for the football game tomorrow
in Center City.

Speaker 19 (01:51:49):
That's too bad. We'll miss you, mydea.

Speaker 1 (01:51:51):
Well, you know how Bronco is about a football game.

Speaker 52 (01:51:54):
Yeah, it was such a big dinner and we ought
to invite somebody to share it with us. Lero, either's
a pretty little girl staying at mister Bullard's.

Speaker 17 (01:52:01):
You mean invite Babs?

Speaker 1 (01:52:03):
You?

Speaker 17 (01:52:03):
Why not? Yes? Why not?

Speaker 1 (01:52:05):
The pretty little girl has a pretty mother, Auntie you
have naturally, if.

Speaker 19 (01:52:09):
We invite Babs, we should invite her mother. Yeah, youve
along with Roy. Let's slip on our overshoes.

Speaker 1 (01:52:28):
Gee, it's keen having snow on Thanksgiving.

Speaker 52 (01:52:31):
Uncle makes things pretty cozy, right, George. I'm glad I
thought about asking Paula and Bab's over.

Speaker 17 (01:52:37):
What if mister bullet won't let them come?

Speaker 19 (01:52:40):
No, Eroy, mister Buller doesn't boss everything, none of his
business if his sister wants to spend Thanksgiving with friends.

Speaker 1 (01:52:46):
Since, why is mister Bullard considered you a friend?

Speaker 17 (01:52:49):
My boy?

Speaker 19 (01:52:50):
It's Thanksgiving, it's the time when we should all be friends.

Speaker 17 (01:52:53):
Okay. Why you ring your friend's doorbell? I'll cover you
with a snowball from behind this tree.

Speaker 1 (01:53:00):
LeRoi, you should make a good target against that fort fight.

Speaker 19 (01:53:05):
Noh, Lira sad ways, I'll lock the ashes off your.

Speaker 49 (01:53:08):
Cigar, Leroy watching whoop? Here comes Bullard's window. Hear ray,
you shouldn't run.

Speaker 48 (01:53:19):
What's going on out there?

Speaker 19 (01:53:21):
I'd better run.

Speaker 17 (01:53:22):
What do you get?

Speaker 14 (01:53:24):
Oh?

Speaker 16 (01:53:24):
If you give, I'm big pack, eh, mister Bullard, you'll
just leave if you break my window?

Speaker 19 (01:53:34):
No, but I'm glad to pay for it. Leroy. Was
aiming at me and missed, but I'll pay for it.

Speaker 48 (01:53:38):
If you aim again at you and hit, I'll pay for.

Speaker 19 (01:53:41):
It now, mister Bullard, I'm sorry it happened. It was
an accident.

Speaker 48 (01:53:46):
Fortunately, it's just a pain. Out of the storm window.
Gildas leave. Why did you come over in the first place.

Speaker 19 (01:53:51):
Yeah, I came over to see if I couldn't take
your sister and little Babs off your hands for Thanksgiving.

Speaker 48 (01:53:56):
Spending the holiday out of town.

Speaker 19 (01:53:59):
Yeah, I didn't know Paula was planning a trimp.

Speaker 48 (01:54:02):
Should you have been consulted?

Speaker 19 (01:54:05):
Well, no, not necessarily, but she might have said goodbye.

Speaker 48 (01:54:08):
Now that you mention it, she did leave a message
for you.

Speaker 19 (01:54:11):
You know what was it?

Speaker 48 (01:54:11):
She said goodbye? Goodbye.

Speaker 45 (01:54:16):
You wait a minute, mister Bullet, if you don't mind,
I've talked to you through the peep hole.

Speaker 48 (01:54:21):
It's cold out there.

Speaker 19 (01:54:23):
Were about the broken window. You shouldn't pay for the pain,
guiltless leeve.

Speaker 48 (01:54:27):
I've been paying for a pain ever since you moved
across the.

Speaker 19 (01:54:30):
Street, even on Thanksgiving. He's a hard man to like, Oh, Kien.

Speaker 17 (01:54:49):
I really don't have to pay for breaking his window.

Speaker 19 (01:54:52):
No, LeRoi, you could take it out.

Speaker 17 (01:54:54):
Of my lunch so nichol a week every other week.

Speaker 19 (01:55:03):
No, I'll take care of it, my boy.

Speaker 17 (01:55:05):
Thanks.

Speaker 1 (01:55:05):
I guess well, I'm going up now and take my bath.

Speaker 19 (01:55:08):
We're not even being set good boy. Yeah, I shouldn't
have gone over to Bullets anyway. You'll never set foot
on his porch again. Yeah, he said, we'll have to
Goilburt and pay him some day. Yeah, I'll put the
money on a stick and poke it through the people
so he can't bite my hand. Ye, yes, Bertie.

Speaker 28 (01:55:29):
Well, mister Bullets system little babs be here for dinner tomorrow.

Speaker 19 (01:55:33):
No, they're out of town, Bertie, unless mister Bullet has
him locked up in the attic.

Speaker 25 (01:55:37):
Yes, you're fooling, ain't you.

Speaker 19 (01:55:41):
Yes, I guess so.

Speaker 25 (01:55:42):
Bertie already put the names in the pot. Too bad.
They can't be here if.

Speaker 28 (01:55:47):
Ms Midrie mister Bronco go to that football game, We're
gonna have more dinner.

Speaker 19 (01:55:50):
We know what to do with well, Leroy and I
will do our best buy it.

Speaker 25 (01:55:54):
Oh, I'm counting on you and Leroy toy double. But
we're loaded.

Speaker 17 (01:55:59):
Of course.

Speaker 28 (01:55:59):
A lot people ain't gonna have a big Thanksgiving.

Speaker 19 (01:56:02):
You well, true, Bertie.

Speaker 25 (01:56:04):
A lot of people just go squeak by you.

Speaker 19 (01:56:07):
We're pretty lucky, Bertie.

Speaker 28 (01:56:08):
Yes, sir, I've been thinking about that while I was
basing that big turkey.

Speaker 17 (01:56:12):
Mister Kilse.

Speaker 28 (01:56:13):
Yes, Bertie, you remember the little boy that wandered in
here from the children's home last Halloween.

Speaker 19 (01:56:18):
Ooh, Mike Smith.

Speaker 25 (01:56:20):
That's right, the little lost ghost.

Speaker 19 (01:56:22):
Shoot kiddy. See, I wonder what kind of Thanksgiving dinner
he's gonna have.

Speaker 25 (01:56:26):
Oh, you have a good dinner, Buddie, may not have
as much as we've got, Bertie.

Speaker 19 (01:56:31):
After church in the morning, why don't I drive over
and pick up a little Mike.

Speaker 25 (01:56:35):
Yes, sir, Now we're lining up for real Thanksgiffing.

Speaker 17 (01:56:38):
You.

Speaker 19 (01:56:38):
Come to think of it, Thanksgiving is no good if
you don't share it.

Speaker 28 (01:56:41):
That's what the Indians did on the first Thanksgiving.

Speaker 25 (01:56:44):
They had a lot of food, and they shared it.

Speaker 58 (01:56:46):
With the Pilgrims had nothing on the water commissioner. The
little pilgrim would be the guest of Big Chief running Water.

Speaker 28 (01:56:53):
Yes, sir, I.

Speaker 8 (01:57:00):
Evening, Berdie, Well, Josh, come in, Hello, Gilbert.

Speaker 15 (01:57:05):
I didn't want to be late for Thanksgiving dinner, so
I thought i'd come and spend the night.

Speaker 19 (01:57:13):
We loved Haby Horace. Well, you told me you had
an engagement.

Speaker 15 (01:57:16):
As a matter of fact, I have, so I dropped
by to bring a little sweet meat for your festive
board tomorrow.

Speaker 25 (01:57:22):
Oh here you are, Berdie, Thank you. Judge. What's in
this jar?

Speaker 15 (01:57:26):
It's cranberry relish that I prepare myself.

Speaker 19 (01:57:31):
You make Cranberry relish, Judge.

Speaker 15 (01:57:34):
Yes, indeed, I didn't know you so handy around the kitchen, well, Bertie,
I spend most of my eyel hours on culinary experiments.
I'm writing a cookbook.

Speaker 25 (01:57:44):
I think it's nice.

Speaker 28 (01:57:45):
The judge is so handy in the kitchen, thank you, Berdie.

Speaker 25 (01:57:48):
Yes, sir, the judge is a handy man.

Speaker 28 (01:57:51):
He spends his working out with the long book and
he's outlives with the cookbook.

Speaker 16 (01:57:55):
It's about it, Berdie, Yes, sir, Miss Killsleeve, that's.

Speaker 28 (01:57:58):
Why the judge can come up with Ranberry reddish.

Speaker 25 (01:58:00):
He spends he's working out of the law book and
is outlive with the cook book.

Speaker 19 (01:58:04):
Yeah, I know me, Mits, Gilsey.

Speaker 17 (01:58:05):
You know why to Jackson come.

Speaker 1 (01:58:06):
Up with Granddad Rudy.

Speaker 16 (01:58:08):
Yes, that's Rightdy s Fancy's working half with the law
bookers outlive with the cookbook.

Speaker 19 (01:58:19):
Judge. You have quite an admirer in Berdie.

Speaker 25 (01:58:21):
Well.

Speaker 15 (01:58:21):
The feeling is mutual, gil Eh. I'm sorry I won't
be here to sample Birdie is Thanksgiving dinner. Well, Marjorie
and Bronco may not be here either, but I'm inviting little.

Speaker 19 (01:58:31):
Mike from the Children's home.

Speaker 17 (01:58:32):
Ah, the little fellow who is lost on Halloween.

Speaker 19 (01:58:35):
Yeah, Mike's gonna be our guest of honor.

Speaker 15 (01:58:38):
Yell there, you're a shining example of the spirit of Thanksgiving.

Speaker 19 (01:58:42):
Well, that's not all I plan to do. I went
over to invite missus Winthrop and Babs, but the old
Bullard said they were out of town.

Speaker 15 (01:58:49):
Oh, so Rumson is spending Thanksgiving alone.

Speaker 19 (01:58:52):
I didn't ask him, Judge, I don't care where he
spends it.

Speaker 15 (01:58:55):
Well, I know Rumsen Bullet is difficult at times, but
he's a lonely man.

Speaker 19 (01:59:00):
I think he wants to be alone.

Speaker 15 (01:59:03):
I'm not so sure, yelleh. Perhaps we just don't understand him.
I know I don't be that as it may. At
a time when the peoples of the world are divided
and suspicious and working at cross purposes, it seems the
least we can do is set an example of amity.

Speaker 30 (01:59:19):
And the cord here at home.

Speaker 24 (01:59:22):
You have.

Speaker 15 (01:59:22):
Chances are the world could achieve more harmony around the
Thanksgiving table than around the conference table.

Speaker 19 (01:59:30):
You're probably right, Josh, I hadn't looked at it that way, right, George,
I'll invite Bullard tomorrow. Well, it's nice of you. To

(01:59:52):
join us for dinner today. Mike.

Speaker 1 (01:59:54):
It's nice of you to invite me, mister Geller slave.

Speaker 19 (01:59:58):
You will have a lot of fun. Yeah, I didn't
think to ask missus Foster when I should bring you home.

Speaker 1 (02:00:04):
Just take me back, and I'm good and full.

Speaker 19 (02:00:09):
Here there's funny to eat, all right. Bertie has a
turkey almost as big as you are.

Speaker 1 (02:00:13):
I don't know if I can eat that much.

Speaker 48 (02:00:16):
Well, i'll help you.

Speaker 1 (02:00:17):
You ought to be a big help. I wonder how
you meant that a lot of us kids are going
out for dinner today.

Speaker 19 (02:00:27):
You're good boy.

Speaker 1 (02:00:28):
I like Thanksgiving. How many times a year does it come?

Speaker 19 (02:00:32):
We'll only once, Mike. But Christmas will be here soon.

Speaker 1 (02:00:36):
Yeah, that's when Santa Claus comes.

Speaker 19 (02:00:38):
Yeah, I'll bet you get a lot of presents.

Speaker 1 (02:00:40):
Yeah, Bobby's even getting a mother and father for Christmas.

Speaker 19 (02:00:44):
Who's Bobby?

Speaker 17 (02:00:45):
He's my friend?

Speaker 19 (02:00:46):
Yeah, I see you will here we are. Remember this house.

Speaker 1 (02:00:52):
This is where you found me when I got lost.
That's right, I sure was dopey to get lost.

Speaker 19 (02:00:58):
You will if you had to get lost. We're glad
you picked our house. Oh, before we go in, Mike,
let's go across the street and ask someone else to
do it. Okay, I'm going to invite the man who
lives in this big house. He's all alone today with.

Speaker 17 (02:01:11):
That big house.

Speaker 1 (02:01:12):
Why is he all alone?

Speaker 19 (02:01:14):
You will, Mike, you know how it is?

Speaker 37 (02:01:18):
You.

Speaker 52 (02:01:18):
Well, this man's a little difficult to understand. Seems he
hasn't many friends. Why well, sometimes he isn't as nice to.

Speaker 19 (02:01:26):
People as he could. We're going to be nice to him.
You see, I feel sorry for mister Bullard. Is not
his name, that's his name. Oh you Guildersley, you're the
morning mister Bullard. Happy Thanksgiving.

Speaker 48 (02:01:41):
Thank you, mister Bullard.

Speaker 19 (02:01:44):
I'd like you to be the little friend of mine.

Speaker 48 (02:01:46):
Mike Smith, how do you do, young man?

Speaker 19 (02:01:50):
Little Mike's from the children's home. He's having dinner with us.

Speaker 1 (02:01:53):
Yeah, turkey, Oh splendid.

Speaker 48 (02:01:55):
I hope you enjoy your dinner, Mike. Mister Bullard, eh,
I like you to join us if you will me. Well,
that's very thoughtful of you, you are.

Speaker 19 (02:02:07):
Mister bullet. It's Thanksgiving. You're all alone.

Speaker 1 (02:02:11):
Yeah, mister says you don't have very many friends.

Speaker 19 (02:02:19):
Oh well, what I.

Speaker 20 (02:02:21):
Meant for your information, Guildersleeve, I have countless friends.

Speaker 48 (02:02:25):
I'm having dinner today at my club.

Speaker 19 (02:02:28):
Yeah, mister bullet, let's not have another misunderstanding. I really
wish you'd come with us.

Speaker 1 (02:02:32):
Yeah, mister feel sorry for you?

Speaker 45 (02:02:38):
Oh? Is that so Guildersleeve. I don't want anybody feeling
sorry for me. You enjoy your dinner, I'll enjoy mine.

Speaker 19 (02:02:45):
Good day, Mike. What are you gonna do with a
fellow like that?

Speaker 1 (02:02:52):
Missus Foster would send him to bed without any dinner.

Speaker 59 (02:02:57):
That's not a bad idea, the great Gillisleeve.

Speaker 19 (02:03:14):
We'll be back in just a minute.

Speaker 20 (02:03:16):
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(02:03:38):
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Speaker 57 (02:03:44):
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Speaker 20 (02:03:46):
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(02:05:13):
seventy seven, Illinois. Right tonight, Well, the Great Guildersleeve has
caught the thanksgiving spirit. He invited Little Mike from the

(02:05:33):
children's home. He even invited Big Bad Bullard.

Speaker 19 (02:05:36):
To share his turkey, but Bullard insisted on not coming.

Speaker 20 (02:05:40):
Now it looks like there will be several empty places
at the table.

Speaker 19 (02:05:43):
Oh more, yes, my dream.

Speaker 17 (02:05:45):
I'm leaving now.

Speaker 1 (02:05:46):
Bronco got tickets for the football game. Oh, he's down
getting gas and I'm going to meet him out front.

Speaker 17 (02:05:51):
We're a little late.

Speaker 52 (02:05:52):
Well, Sah, you can't be with us for dinner. But
before you go, I want you to meet little Mike.

Speaker 8 (02:05:57):
Mike.

Speaker 25 (02:05:59):
You Mike, he's in here with me testing the turkey.

Speaker 52 (02:06:02):
Mister Gil, you don't spoil his dinner. Bertie, No, sir,
you better send him in. I wouldn't mind you to
see him.

Speaker 1 (02:06:09):
Who did you want to see me, mister Gildersleeve.

Speaker 19 (02:06:12):
Mike, This is my niece Midre.

Speaker 17 (02:06:14):
Hello Mike. Hello?

Speaker 1 (02:06:16):
What's her niece?

Speaker 19 (02:06:18):
Well, in this case, she's somebody. I'm uncle.

Speaker 1 (02:06:21):
Who are you here for dinner?

Speaker 17 (02:06:22):
Too? Well?

Speaker 1 (02:06:24):
I live here, but I can't be here for dinner.
You'll excuse me, won't you. Well, I don't know.

Speaker 19 (02:06:30):
She and her husband are going to a football game.

Speaker 17 (02:06:32):
Mike.

Speaker 1 (02:06:33):
Would you rather see a football game than eat turkey?

Speaker 34 (02:06:36):
No?

Speaker 17 (02:06:36):
But our college is playing.

Speaker 1 (02:06:38):
Isn't anybody going to eat Thanksgiving.

Speaker 17 (02:06:40):
Dinner with us?

Speaker 30 (02:06:41):
Well?

Speaker 19 (02:06:42):
Leroy will be here. He's over on the hill with
his sled.

Speaker 17 (02:06:45):
What about mister buller donkey?

Speaker 19 (02:06:47):
He expressed regrets word style?

Speaker 1 (02:06:51):
You feel sorry for him?

Speaker 19 (02:06:54):
You feel sorry for him?

Speaker 1 (02:06:55):
Okay, that's Bronco. Well, Mike, I'm awfully grate you came.

Speaker 17 (02:07:00):
Goodbye.

Speaker 1 (02:07:01):
Good Bye missus Marjorie.

Speaker 17 (02:07:04):
Mike, it's just plain Marjorie.

Speaker 1 (02:07:06):
But you've got a husband that makes you missus. Well,
I'll still be Marjorie to you. Goodbye. What do we
do now, mister Gildersleeve, Well.

Speaker 52 (02:07:20):
It's quite a while until dinner, and I'm out of cigars.
Why don't we drop by mister Peet's and then join
Leroy for a sled dride.

Speaker 1 (02:07:27):
Okay, shall we go back and help Bertie taste the
turkey before we go real?

Speaker 19 (02:07:32):
I guess we could take a little slipper where it
won't show. Hello, Pep, what can I do it for?

Speaker 48 (02:07:57):
Union?

Speaker 52 (02:07:57):
And I need some cigars? Pepke a chance on you're
being open today.

Speaker 46 (02:08:01):
I'm cooking in a little while your usual brand.

Speaker 19 (02:08:05):
Yeah, that's right, Peebe. Aren't you gonna say hello to
Mike is here?

Speaker 17 (02:08:10):
Yeah?

Speaker 46 (02:08:12):
Well I didn't see you, darn, I have an old encounter.

Speaker 19 (02:08:14):
Oh mikey hello, mister Peebe here, Mike, let me lift
you up on one of these stools.

Speaker 17 (02:08:20):
Ie, climb up.

Speaker 19 (02:08:22):
He's having Thanksgiving dinner with this PD.

Speaker 46 (02:08:24):
You don't say you care to have a soda on
the house, Mike, No, I get to dinner.

Speaker 9 (02:08:29):
Huh.

Speaker 1 (02:08:30):
He didn't give me a chance to answer.

Speaker 19 (02:08:34):
Yeah, you better save up. We have a big dinner
to take care of.

Speaker 1 (02:08:37):
There are many people eating with mister Gildersleeve in may Well.

Speaker 19 (02:08:41):
Marjorie and Bronco are going to the game over in
Center City pev.

Speaker 46 (02:08:44):
Well, if it was forty years ago, I'd go out
there and sit in the snow myself.

Speaker 1 (02:08:48):
Mister Gildersleeve nervous or something?

Speaker 19 (02:08:51):
You out?

Speaker 48 (02:08:53):
Excuse es pe d Yeah, Well what is it?

Speaker 1 (02:08:57):
Why don't we ask mister Peevee over for dinner?

Speaker 19 (02:09:00):
That's a nice thought. I'm sure his dinner's all planned,
but why don't you ask him?

Speaker 17 (02:09:05):
Okay, mister Peevee. Oh am, I included.

Speaker 1 (02:09:09):
Now, yes, would you like to come over and help
us eat our turkey?

Speaker 46 (02:09:13):
Well, I'll be eating at home, Mike, But thank you
just the name.

Speaker 1 (02:09:17):
That's all right.

Speaker 19 (02:09:18):
I thought you might be lonesome, like mister Peet has
a wife at home, he doesn't get.

Speaker 46 (02:09:22):
Loadsome last Thanksgiving, I would have taken you up on
the invitation. Oh just happened that I was alone. We'd
planned on having a turkey, but missus Peevee went to
visit her mother instead.

Speaker 1 (02:09:41):
Wish she'd visit her mother again this year, so you'd
be lonesome enough to eat.

Speaker 19 (02:09:46):
With us, Phoebe. Mike has bowed and determined to fill
every place at the table.

Speaker 1 (02:09:52):
Hey, isn't that mister Bullard park in the big car
out front?

Speaker 19 (02:09:56):
Yeah?

Speaker 17 (02:09:56):
It is.

Speaker 19 (02:09:57):
He's coming in here.

Speaker 1 (02:09:59):
He's still alone. Why don't we give him another chance
to eat with us?

Speaker 19 (02:10:03):
Mike?

Speaker 1 (02:10:03):
Maybe he wants to be coached. I do sometimes I
can't get under the ben won't come out.

Speaker 19 (02:10:10):
Well, all right, Just for you, Mike, I'll ask you
once more.

Speaker 48 (02:10:14):
How do you do? Maybe? Hello?

Speaker 19 (02:10:17):
Hello, Mike, Hello, Hello mister Bullard.

Speaker 57 (02:10:22):
Oh Hello, what a cold fish?

Speaker 1 (02:10:27):
Go ahead, mister gillisleep.

Speaker 52 (02:10:29):
Ask him, ask me what well, mister Bullard, if you'd
care to reconsider the invitation to dinner is still good.

Speaker 48 (02:10:37):
Thank you, Gilda's Sleeve. But I have plans of my own.

Speaker 19 (02:10:40):
Well, we love to have you come to our house, Guildersleeve.

Speaker 48 (02:10:43):
Stop nagging at me to come to your house.

Speaker 19 (02:10:46):
You're all right.

Speaker 45 (02:10:47):
You have your dinner and I'll have my party at
the club or peebe. I want five pounds of your
best after dinner.

Speaker 1 (02:10:53):
Minutes man, five pounds. You must be having a big party.

Speaker 48 (02:10:58):
Yes, yes, I am.

Speaker 45 (02:10:59):
Thanks as a day to gather your friends around you.
And although I may not be considered popular by one
of my neighbors, I have many friends a peebe, make
that ten pounds of mint.

Speaker 46 (02:11:11):
Ten pounds.

Speaker 48 (02:11:13):
I'm gladly I opened up to day.

Speaker 19 (02:11:16):
Stuffed shirt must be inviting his whole club.

Speaker 48 (02:11:20):
How much will that be, Phoebe? Well it comes to seven, guy, right,
but he caught you to.

Speaker 17 (02:11:24):
Ride a mint.

Speaker 1 (02:11:25):
You must not be having anything for dinner but mint, Mike,
they are, Phoebe.

Speaker 45 (02:11:31):
These mint should be the crowning touch after my friends
and I enjoy a hearty meeting. We're having vicious swas
a tossed green salad with anchobies, roast peasant, golden peasant,
you might wild rice, of course, candid yams, and for dessert,
flaming plum pudding.

Speaker 1 (02:11:50):
John's very good, mister Gildersleeve. Maybe he'd invite us to his.

Speaker 52 (02:11:54):
Dinner, right, come with me. We have to pick up Leroy.

(02:12:15):
Thanks for picking me up, mank Well, it'll soon be
time for turkey.

Speaker 25 (02:12:19):
Boy?

Speaker 1 (02:12:19):
Did I work up an appetite sliding on the hill.
I'm hungry too, me too.

Speaker 19 (02:12:24):
Three of us will have a fine type.

Speaker 17 (02:12:26):
Is mister blood coming? No?

Speaker 19 (02:12:28):
Bullard's invited a lot of people out to his club
for a fancy dinner.

Speaker 1 (02:12:32):
Vic Schwaz, Lee Roy, it was nice of you to
take me down on the hill on your sled.

Speaker 17 (02:12:38):
Oh that's okay for good.

Speaker 1 (02:12:41):
I like you, Lee Roy do why? I don't know.
I guess it's like missus Foster says. She says, little
boys always want to be like big boys.

Speaker 17 (02:12:51):
Well, I am getting pretty big, I.

Speaker 19 (02:12:54):
Guess, Mike. Someday you'll be as big as lead On.

Speaker 1 (02:12:57):
I don't know if I'll ever get that big, you know, Mike,
I sort of like you too.

Speaker 17 (02:13:03):
Thank you.

Speaker 1 (02:13:04):
Hey, we're coming close. To where I live.

Speaker 19 (02:13:07):
Yeah, that's your home, my boy.

Speaker 17 (02:13:08):
Hey, stop the car, just stop the car.

Speaker 19 (02:13:11):
Well you all right?

Speaker 1 (02:13:15):
Why are we stopping here? I haven't had dinner yet?

Speaker 19 (02:13:19):
Yes, Lee Roy, why are we stopping?

Speaker 17 (02:13:20):
Hunk? Could we get some more little kids like Mike
and take him home to dinner?

Speaker 19 (02:13:25):
Right, that's a wonderful idea.

Speaker 1 (02:13:27):
Oh boy, Lee Roy, can I go in and see
who's that?

Speaker 17 (02:13:30):
Sure kiddy? You bet?

Speaker 19 (02:13:32):
You run on in, Mike and round up a car
for re. Wait.

Speaker 1 (02:13:35):
Oh boy, I've been wanting to fight somebody.

Speaker 19 (02:13:38):
Yeah, what a fine little fellow.

Speaker 17 (02:13:40):
Yeah he's okay, Lee Roy.

Speaker 19 (02:13:43):
Yeah, there's another fine fellow sitting right next to me.

Speaker 17 (02:13:47):
Oh heck gosh, gee, Oh that's the way.

Speaker 19 (02:13:53):
To have Thanksgiving, Yes, sir, invite people to dinner who
appreciate it. The heck with board.

Speaker 58 (02:13:59):
Let him have beginners, all these fine friends. Boy, I
didn't expect you back so soon.

Speaker 30 (02:14:05):
Mike.

Speaker 1 (02:14:06):
Well kids, Mike, they've all gone out, they have. But
you know who's sitting in there with no place to go?

Speaker 19 (02:14:13):
Mister Buller, mister Bullert.

Speaker 1 (02:14:16):
Now, mister Bullard, they know you're in there.

Speaker 19 (02:14:20):
What do you know you imagine that?

Speaker 48 (02:14:23):
Hello, mister Bullerd, oh hello, go leave me right, Hi.

Speaker 19 (02:14:28):
Mister Billard, You're the last man I expected to see here.

Speaker 45 (02:14:31):
Oh well, I thought i'd come over and take some
of the children to dinner. You're not the only one
who can entertain friends, and.

Speaker 48 (02:14:38):
Well, good day. I think i'd take my minutes and
go home.

Speaker 52 (02:14:43):
Wait a minute, mister Bullert, Yes, I thought you were
going to have a big party at your club.

Speaker 45 (02:14:48):
Well, I intended to gidless leave, but a lot of
pushy people like you have taken all the children.

Speaker 19 (02:14:53):
Well we didn't get our share. There's room for one more.

Speaker 1 (02:14:59):
You mean, Yeah, how many times do we have to
ask you?

Speaker 17 (02:15:06):
I'll get in with you?

Speaker 48 (02:15:07):
All right? All right, thank you here, I thank.

Speaker 19 (02:15:10):
You right, George Bullard. This is a fine idea. I'm
so glad you're going to be with us.

Speaker 48 (02:15:18):
Thank you, Guildersleeve.

Speaker 1 (02:15:22):
You pry mister Bullard. You have more friends than you
thought you had.

Speaker 19 (02:15:27):
Yes, sir, there's something about thanksgiving.

Speaker 20 (02:15:50):
The great Guild of Sleeve will be with us again
in just thirty seconds. Have you tasted the two delicious
new versions of Philadelphia brand cream cheeses. Now you can
get delicately rich Philadelphia cream cheese filled with spicy bits
of chives and Philadelphia cream cheese with pieces of red
pimento all through. Imagine the delicious variety of easy snacks

(02:16:13):
and sandwiches you can make with these two new kinds
of Philadelphia Brand cream cheese.

Speaker 44 (02:16:19):
Try them tomorrow.

Speaker 20 (02:16:21):
Just be sure you get genuine Philadelphia brand cream cheese.
Remember there's only one Philadelphia brand, and it's made and
guaranteed fresh by craft.

Speaker 19 (02:16:39):
This is Geldersleeve Again. Thanksgiving is a holiday we Americans cherish.
It's a part of our national tradition. And more than that,
it shows how our way of life in this country
has always been linked so closely with religion. These days,
I think we all realize how important it is that
we strengthen our faith for ourselves and our children. Take

(02:17:04):
someone to church this week. You'll both be richer for it.
Good Night, the.

Speaker 20 (02:17:22):
Great Guiltless Leave. He is played by Willard water Upon.
The show is written by John Elliott. The Mandy White
Blandy partially transcribed. Included in the cast are Walter Tentley,
Mary Lee Rod, Lillian Randolph Gale Gordon, Tommy reddig earl
Ross and Dick Lagrant. This is John Heaston saying good

(02:17:44):
night for the Craft Foods Company, makers of those famous
craft quality food products. Be sure to listen in next
Wednesday and every Wednesday for the further adventures of the.

Speaker 57 (02:17:55):
Great Guilds League. In a sandwich, what do you like best?

Speaker 6 (02:18:09):
Say?

Speaker 20 (02:18:09):
In a cold beef sandwich, a cheese sandwich, egg, salad, salami.

Speaker 19 (02:18:14):
What do you like best?

Speaker 20 (02:18:16):
Well, if you've ever tried it, I bet you'll say
Crafts prepared mustard, because when you add a little Kraft mustard,
you add a lot of tang. In fact, there are
two kinds of Kraft mustard, salad mustard mild and delicately spiced,
and Kraft mustard with snappy horseradish added. Have both kinds
on hand, and remember the next time you make a sandwich,

(02:18:39):
when you add a little mustard, you add a lot
of tang, buy Crafts prepared mustard.

Speaker 7 (02:19:01):
Now, of course, Gail Gordon as Mark Rumson Bullard in
the Great Gildersleeve Shows is not something that we're not
unused to. We've heard him portray that character before. But
the young boy that was brought in identified as Tommy Ready,

(02:19:22):
I cannot find for certain that this is this young man,
but I believe it's the young man because the age's work.
Who portrayed Jeff in Lassie, the nineteen fifty four to
nineteen fifty seven version of Lassie where he lived with

(02:19:44):
Jan Clayton and George Cleveland, they both two different actors,
then were in the main version of Lassie that we're
familiar with today. For that three year period he played
Jeff Miller. So if this is in fact Tommy Reddig,
we have a link to television in old time radio

(02:20:06):
one that we hadn't actually expected to find. Reddig died
in nineteen ninety six at the age of fifty four
years of age. In later life, he became a software engineer.
He really got tired of He did not enjoy the
whole acting thing as a youngster, and sadly in his

(02:20:31):
later years he got involved in recreational drugs and such.
But he did become a motivational speaker and learned dealing
with personal computers. Database programmer, did a lot of that stuff,
and he did make appearances as a grown up Jeff

(02:20:51):
Miller in the final episode of the syndicated series The
New Lassie in nineteen ninety two, along with John Provost,
the second owner of Lassie, she will. So there was
that he died of heart failure at the age of
fifty four years of age. He was, by the way,

(02:21:13):
interestingly enough, he was cremated as ashes scattered at sea
three miles off Marina del Rey, California, with the ashes
of his friend, fellow child actor Rusty Hamer. So there's
some sadness in along with our classic radio goodness here
on Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Cox. Coming up next

(02:21:35):
on Classic Radio Theater, something a little skippy, little smile, Claudia.

Speaker 48 (02:21:48):
Know what color rad means?

Speaker 60 (02:21:49):
It stands for control of electromagnetic radiation. Sounds pretty complicated
if you're not an electronic engineer, and yet all you
have to do is dial your AM radio to six
forty or twelve in the event of an enemy air attack,
and thanks to Connel rad you will continue to receive
official information in times of civil defense emergency for official
news and civil defense instructions Nyle ConL Rath at six

(02:22:13):
forty or twelve forty on your AM standard radio.

Speaker 7 (02:22:17):
We wrap up this edation of Classic Radio Theater with
Wyatt Talks with an episode of Claudia. This episode goes
back seventy eight years to November twenty first, nineteen forty seven.

Speaker 53 (02:22:30):
Your Coca Cola Botler presents Claudia. Claudia based on the
original stories by Rose Franken, brought to you transcribed Monday
through Friday by your friendly neighbor who bottles Coca Cola.

(02:22:53):
Relax and while you're listening, refresh yourself.

Speaker 44 (02:22:57):
Have a coke. And now Claudia, oh laughed.

Speaker 3 (02:23:16):
It just when we were settled down. Who do you
think it is? I hope it isn't anybody.

Speaker 37 (02:23:20):
You mean you hope it's nobody.

Speaker 17 (02:23:22):
Yes, I guess.

Speaker 37 (02:23:23):
So.

Speaker 3 (02:23:23):
I'm in the middle of a darn that.

Speaker 37 (02:23:25):
Case where I wanted to just let it ring. We'll
act as if we're out.

Speaker 3 (02:23:27):
That would be dishonest.

Speaker 37 (02:23:29):
I'm going I come back here now. What's dishonest about it?
It's o door. Let's let it ring its head off.

Speaker 3 (02:23:35):
It might be opportunity ringing.

Speaker 37 (02:23:36):
Opportunity knocks.

Speaker 3 (02:23:39):
If we don't answer it now, whoever it is will
go away.

Speaker 37 (02:23:41):
Good, good, David.

Speaker 3 (02:23:44):
It's like not answering the phone, only worse because it
can't be a wrong number.

Speaker 37 (02:23:48):
Force yourself, darling, teach you some discipline.

Speaker 17 (02:23:51):
I don't want discipline.

Speaker 3 (02:23:52):
I just want to know who it is.

Speaker 37 (02:23:54):
I'm going you are a weak minded bride.

Speaker 3 (02:23:56):
All right, I'm weak minded and I'm proud of it.

Speaker 17 (02:24:01):
Nobody there?

Speaker 19 (02:24:05):
Who was it?

Speaker 37 (02:24:05):
Now?

Speaker 3 (02:24:05):
You see they went away?

Speaker 27 (02:24:08):
You beast?

Speaker 37 (02:24:09):
Now we'll never know. It's good. Come on, sit down,
might we'll resume our peace and quiet.

Speaker 3 (02:24:15):
You may be able to resume it, but I won't.
I'm on pins and needles.

Speaker 37 (02:24:18):
Fine, you can use them on my socks.

Speaker 1 (02:24:20):
You really can.

Speaker 3 (02:24:20):
Forget all about it. That doorbell's gonna ring in my
head all night.

Speaker 37 (02:24:24):
Put on air, mups out day. Now, let's see what
pages I on? Hm, here we are.

Speaker 54 (02:24:31):
This is a fascinating book on architecture and concrete. Oh
I wanna get it read by morning.

Speaker 3 (02:24:37):
Oh, David, mm, we always gonna be happy like this?

Speaker 37 (02:24:42):
We are?

Speaker 3 (02:24:45):
You know marriage is easy, you think so? All you
have to do is love the person you're married to.

Speaker 54 (02:24:51):
That's only the first thing, and the easiest I suppose
love is to marriage.

Speaker 3 (02:24:56):
What the solid foundation of a building is to the
rest of us.

Speaker 37 (02:25:00):
Yep, that's it.

Speaker 3 (02:25:02):
But David, that sounds so much less exciting than it
really is.

Speaker 25 (02:25:07):
Oh.

Speaker 54 (02:25:07):
I think it's very exciting because when it's all built
up you've really got yourself something.

Speaker 3 (02:25:12):
Our house has a terrific foundation, hasn't it.

Speaker 37 (02:25:15):
Colossal?

Speaker 6 (02:25:16):
Colossal?

Speaker 3 (02:25:19):
Well, come on, Shakespeare, let's darn some more socks and
don't purse so loud. Mister Naughton wants to read about
Cement Shah.

Speaker 37 (02:25:30):
Quiet again, David.

Speaker 3 (02:25:36):
The doorbell?

Speaker 44 (02:25:38):
What doorbell?

Speaker 3 (02:25:39):
The front doorbell?

Speaker 27 (02:25:40):
Come on, we'll go together.

Speaker 37 (02:25:41):
Come, I care you are imagining things?

Speaker 24 (02:25:43):
What?

Speaker 37 (02:25:43):
No doorbell rang? But it did must be ringing in
your head. You got wheels in your head like you
said it would.

Speaker 3 (02:25:50):
What are you talking about? You mean you really didn't
hear it.

Speaker 37 (02:25:52):
I didn't hear a thing, really didn't.

Speaker 3 (02:25:54):
Oh, you're fooling you good for nothing.

Speaker 37 (02:25:56):
Fooling darling. You were fooling me. You really didn't hear
the bells, did you, David?

Speaker 3 (02:26:02):
No, you can make prison crazy saying.

Speaker 24 (02:26:03):
Things like that.

Speaker 37 (02:26:04):
No, I don't have to work very hard.

Speaker 17 (02:26:06):
I know.

Speaker 37 (02:26:06):
I suppose you think you heard that bell?

Speaker 3 (02:26:08):
Oh you come on, Shakespeare. We've had enough discipline.

Speaker 28 (02:26:13):
And if it isn't anyone there, it's spook.

Speaker 37 (02:26:15):
There won't be it's spooke.

Speaker 19 (02:26:18):
Why Fritz, you're the spooks?

Speaker 37 (02:26:20):
Yeah, it's me.

Speaker 19 (02:26:22):
Good evening, missus, Fred good evening, mister Norton.

Speaker 3 (02:26:26):
Fritz say, did you come up and rang earlier?

Speaker 26 (02:26:28):
Yeah?

Speaker 29 (02:26:29):
I thought you was.

Speaker 24 (02:26:30):
Oh we weren't.

Speaker 3 (02:26:31):
But when we got to the door you'd gone. I
what a relief to know who it was.

Speaker 54 (02:26:35):
I don't think missus Norton would have slept a wink
if you hadn't come back, Frett, I would not have
slipped the wink.

Speaker 37 (02:26:41):
Neither, Fritz.

Speaker 24 (02:26:42):
What is it is?

Speaker 17 (02:26:42):
Brett?

Speaker 8 (02:26:42):
All right?

Speaker 26 (02:26:43):
Oh?

Speaker 61 (02:26:43):
No, no, Frett that she is fine, wonderful and for
a second time must tell you we both so enjoyed
the opera last.

Speaker 37 (02:26:53):
Don't thank Fred. You can go in my place any
old time.

Speaker 61 (02:26:57):
No, but I have something important to tell you now.
I do not disturb you and mister Norton at this hour,
but it is important. Oh, come inside, Frich, will sit
down in the living room. No, no, no, I tell
you here, it's fast. Missus Norton. You would like an
apartment of your own?

Speaker 28 (02:27:17):
Would we?

Speaker 17 (02:27:18):
Alice?

Speaker 3 (02:27:19):
Here's only for two months more, and I haven't found
another thing?

Speaker 61 (02:27:22):
Yes, and no A bet that tells me how you
would like to have your your own furniture.

Speaker 3 (02:27:27):
And carp Yeah, where are we going to find it?

Speaker 37 (02:27:30):
I think I find it.

Speaker 17 (02:27:31):
For you, David.

Speaker 3 (02:27:33):
No, I really think I'm hearing things.

Speaker 37 (02:27:35):
I heard that too. What do you mean, Fretch, you
think you found one for it?

Speaker 25 (02:27:40):
Right here on the.

Speaker 61 (02:27:41):
Twelfth floor, the twelfth floor, Yeah, with the sun shining
in the bedroom, and we painted for you because you're
a lieutenant. And they take with them everything, they leave
you only the four wards in the ceiling.

Speaker 37 (02:27:56):
Let's not get excited about and let's let's hear the
whole story.

Speaker 61 (02:27:59):
I tell you everything. I am the super intendent, so
I hear. First day I'm moving, I hear this afternoon
missus Lee. She tells me her husband he has gotten
sick and they must go away by monday. She gives
me the apartment to rent. She has no time to
bother and I tell Bertha, and Bertha she tells.

Speaker 37 (02:28:19):
Me to tell you good.

Speaker 54 (02:28:21):
Things like this just don't happen, not these days anyway.
Does missus Lee have someone to turn the apartment over to.

Speaker 37 (02:28:29):
She does not say so.

Speaker 61 (02:28:30):
She only say that I should ask if somebody wants it.

Speaker 27 (02:28:34):
She is upstairs now, I mean we should go right
up yeah tonight.

Speaker 61 (02:28:39):
But she asks only one person to come because of
her husband. Of course, David no, Darling, you go, yeah,
it is better for missus Norton.

Speaker 37 (02:28:51):
You know another woman. The apartment is a twelve C
friend Missus Norton. And I don't know how to thank
you for this.

Speaker 6 (02:28:58):
I do not try.

Speaker 61 (02:29:00):
We will be glad Beta and me that that if
you move, you do not move away from this building.

Speaker 37 (02:29:06):
I go now and tell Beta.

Speaker 1 (02:29:08):
We'll call you on the house phone, Fritz, as soon
as I get done and tell you what happened.

Speaker 37 (02:29:12):
I'll be wait for the phone. You want me to
take you up?

Speaker 27 (02:29:16):
I love it.

Speaker 37 (02:29:17):
I leave the door on the latch.

Speaker 54 (02:29:19):
Uh, Claudia, Yep, we really don't want this apartment, do we, David,
are you crazy?

Speaker 37 (02:29:26):
I mean, we don't really care much, do we?

Speaker 17 (02:29:30):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (02:29:31):
Oh no, No, we don't care much.

Speaker 37 (02:29:33):
That's what I thought, because then it doesn't matter much.

Speaker 3 (02:29:37):
As a matter of fact, it doesn't matter at all.

Speaker 26 (02:29:39):
Hey did I say that?

Speaker 1 (02:29:40):
You did?

Speaker 54 (02:29:42):
And I want you to remember, Darling, We've been perfectly
happy on the second floor, haven't we?

Speaker 8 (02:29:47):
Perfectly?

Speaker 3 (02:29:48):
Only I have missed the sun shining in the bedroom.
And I do hate mister Tucker's furniture, and all the
radiator is spit in the faucet's leak and oh David
on the twelfth. F Oh, we'll have an apartment with
ceilings and sunshine and nobody's left over furniture.

Speaker 37 (02:30:06):
Nice shopping to you, darling. Kiss me for luck, kiss
you for anything you want?

Speaker 3 (02:30:37):
Yes, missus Lee, Fritz told me to come up.

Speaker 27 (02:30:40):
Oh yes, missus Norton, come in.

Speaker 6 (02:30:42):
Thank you.

Speaker 37 (02:30:43):
We'll have to be quiet.

Speaker 3 (02:30:45):
Would you rather I came back tomorrow?

Speaker 27 (02:30:48):
No, I'd like to get this settled, but I I
won't be able to show you either of the bedrooms.
My husband is in one and my little boys asleep
in the other. You have a little boy, Fritz didn't
say that he's seven.

Speaker 3 (02:30:58):
I suppose he's terribly excited about going away, terribly.

Speaker 27 (02:31:02):
He's planning a beautiful mountain holidays, skating and sledding with
his father. Oh, I have the heart to tell him.

Speaker 3 (02:31:08):
Seven is such a little boy.

Speaker 24 (02:31:11):
Have you any children?

Speaker 17 (02:31:12):
No, we're just married.

Speaker 27 (02:31:14):
This is a nice apartment for children. One of the
room's faces south.

Speaker 3 (02:31:18):
You mean we really can have it.

Speaker 27 (02:31:20):
I don't care who lives here. He'd been taken so
by surprise.

Speaker 17 (02:31:24):
I course.

Speaker 27 (02:31:26):
There's the matter of rent. We're paid up to missus Lee.

Speaker 3 (02:31:29):
Why don't you let my husband settle it with Fritz.
Then you won't have to bother.

Speaker 27 (02:31:32):
Yes, yes, that's fine. Fritz knows all about it.

Speaker 3 (02:31:36):
We won't have any trouble and away.

Speaker 27 (02:31:38):
I'm I'm glad Fritz sent you instead of somebody else.
You've a long life ahead of you. This is a
happy place to start it. My husband and I were
only married six months when we moved in.

Speaker 3 (02:31:51):
When you're ready to come back here, missus Lee, I
will you let.

Speaker 27 (02:31:54):
Us know we won't come back not here. Don't wait
for us, don't don't wait for anything, missus Norton.

Speaker 19 (02:32:02):
Ever, I won't.

Speaker 3 (02:32:06):
Is there anything I could do to help you? Could I?

Speaker 27 (02:32:09):
I pack clean or do it myself. It's better to
keep busy.

Speaker 3 (02:32:14):
Well, then I'll I'll go back downstairs and we'll make
all the arrangements with Fritz.

Speaker 27 (02:32:19):
I wish I could have shown you around. Would you
like to see the kitchen in the living room? They're
a little messy.

Speaker 3 (02:32:24):
I can see enough from here. It feel as if
I've intruded.

Speaker 27 (02:32:28):
As it is, you've been very kind, very considerate, and
starting Monday, but lace it's yours.

Speaker 3 (02:32:35):
Oh yes, you can count on it, and thank you,
Missus Lee. Thank you very much. I wish I knew
what to say to you about your husband, but I
I don't. I mean, I know how awful it must be.

Speaker 27 (02:32:49):
Just wish us luck.

Speaker 3 (02:32:51):
I do with all my heart.

Speaker 6 (02:33:04):
Is that you, dear?

Speaker 17 (02:33:06):
Yes, it's me.

Speaker 37 (02:33:07):
Well, how's the new tenant in twelve See?

Speaker 17 (02:33:11):
Fine?

Speaker 54 (02:33:12):
You don't sound fine. What's the matter, oh, darling, I
don't be disappointed, you said yourself. Things like this don't happen.
We've been perfectly happy here. I I never really expect it.

Speaker 3 (02:33:24):
It's not that, David, we are the lieutenants in twelve Sea.
Apartment's ours.

Speaker 25 (02:33:29):
It is m ll.

Speaker 54 (02:33:31):
You certainly had me fooled, coming back looking as if
you'd lost your best friend. It's ours, ceiling, windows, sunshine,
everything in the fireplace, in.

Speaker 25 (02:33:40):
The living room.

Speaker 37 (02:33:42):
What's the matter. Isn't it a nice apartment?

Speaker 3 (02:33:45):
I I I guess so I didn't see much of it, David.
Her husband's offully sick.

Speaker 37 (02:33:51):
Oh, so that's it.

Speaker 3 (02:33:53):
They have to leave for the mountains. Oh, I guess
it must be as lungs Oh, David, can things like
that happen?

Speaker 27 (02:34:02):
So suddenly?

Speaker 37 (02:34:03):
Anything can happen suddenly.

Speaker 3 (02:34:06):
A week ago, she never dreamt and to day. Oh, David,
I I'm not sure I want the apartment now. Somehow
it doesn't seem fair.

Speaker 37 (02:34:16):
I know what you mean.

Speaker 3 (02:34:19):
She has a little boy, she's not much older than
we are, and yet she's so wonderful about it, so
much more wonderful than I could ever be. She even
says she's sure we're gonna love the apartment.

Speaker 37 (02:34:32):
We are going to love it. And you stop feeling guilty.

Speaker 3 (02:34:36):
You mean it's all right for me to be so
happy in spite of her being so sad.

Speaker 37 (02:34:42):
You go right ahead and be happy, are you?

Speaker 15 (02:34:46):
Yes?

Speaker 3 (02:34:49):
There's an extra room, David, h there is?

Speaker 37 (02:34:52):
Eh?

Speaker 17 (02:34:53):
What do we use it for?

Speaker 16 (02:34:55):
Ooh?

Speaker 37 (02:34:57):
I have to think it over.

Speaker 3 (02:34:59):
What about the wall, David? What color are we gonna
pay them?

Speaker 37 (02:35:02):
Well, we'll have to think that over too.

Speaker 3 (02:35:04):
Say, we've got an awful lot of thinking to do
and an awful lot of thanking.

Speaker 17 (02:35:09):
David.

Speaker 37 (02:35:10):
You bet.

Speaker 3 (02:35:12):
You know an hour ago I was so happy I
thought i'd bust. Now because I'm a little sad, and
why I feel even happier? Does that make sense?

Speaker 37 (02:35:22):
Profound sense?

Speaker 6 (02:35:23):
Darling?

Speaker 3 (02:35:24):
You too, Me too, Darling. Do you think we're gonna
be six times as happy? On the twelfth of fur
as we've been on the second Wait and see. Oh
I wish it were naw, I wish it were na.

Speaker 53 (02:35:43):
All story material used on this broadcast of Claudia was
under the supervision of Rose Franken and William brown Maloney.
When guests say don't go to a lot of trouble,
they mean it. Folks enjoy hospitality more when it's effortless.
That's one of the many blessings of ice cold coca cola.

(02:36:04):
Not only is it delicious and refreshing, but serving it
is the simplest, easiest form of hospitality you can offer.
So keep it always on hand in your refrigerator, buy
it by the case, and earn a well deserved reputation
for successful entertaining. Enjoy the pause that refreshes both.

Speaker 44 (02:36:23):
Hostess and guest.

Speaker 53 (02:36:26):
Every day, Monday through Friday, Claudia comes to you, transcribed
with the best wishes of your friendly neighbor who bottles
coca cola. So listen again Monday at the same time.
And now this is Joe King saying au revoir. And remember,
whoever you are, whatever you do, wherever you may be.
When you think of refreshment, think of Coca cola or

(02:36:47):
ice cold. Coca cola makes any pause the pause that refreshes.

Speaker 7 (02:37:17):
Sometimes when sad things happen, it results in good things
happening for other people. And that's kind of what you
dealt with right there, Claudia, going back seventy eight years
ago on November twenty first, nineteen forty seven, here on
Classic Radio Theater with Wyatt Cox. Join us for our

(02:37:40):
Saturday program, and we will be dealing with more Thanksgiving,
including Harold Perry as the Great Gilder Sleeve as Guildy
tries to get a b Ration book and dealing with
Thanksgiving Dinner. Also the Harold Perry Show that would come
eight years later over ons where he's directing the story

(02:38:03):
of Miles Standish and then the Doctor Christian and the
Prelude to Thanksgiving and Lamont Johnson as Tarzan from nineteen
fifty one. And we'll wrap it all up with Thanksgiving
Dinner over at Lamon Abner's Place. That's all coming up
on our next Classic Radio Theater for Saturday. Have yourself
a great Friday and a great weekend ahead, and we'll

(02:38:25):
see you tomorrow for more Classic Radio Theater. I'm Wyatt Cox.

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Classic Radio 11-21-25 - Thanksgiving Dinners, and Jack thinks he's a turkey

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}Classic Radio 11-21-25 - Thanksgiving Dinners, and Jack thinks he's a turkey