July 31, 2025 • 7 mins
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Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Chapter ten, A brief account of my conversations with Doctor Nebulosis,
Sir amber Opake, and Lord Cornicor, who tell me many
things that I never knew before, for which I was
very grateful. Lord Bulgar and I were more than pleased
with our new friends, Doctor Nebulosis, Sir amber Opake, and
Lord corncor although so eager were they to make us
(00:20):
thoroughly comfortable that they overdid the matter at times and
left me scarcely a moment to myself in which to
make an entry in my note book. They were extremely solicitous,
lest in my ignorance I should set down something wrong
about them, For said Sir amber Opake. Now that thou
hast found the way to this underworld of ours, little Baron,
I feel assured that we shall have a number of
(00:42):
visitors from thy people every year or so, and I
have already issued orders to have extra beds made as
soon as the wood can be quarried. Doctor Nebulosis gave
me a very interesting account of the various ailments which
the Macamenkes suffer from, all sickness among our people. Little
Baron said, he is pure mental or emotional, that is,
of the mind or feelings, there is no such thing
(01:04):
as bodily infirmity among us. Wine and strong drink are
unknown in our world, and the food we eat is
light and easily digested. We are never exposed to the
danger of breathing a dust laden atmosphere. And while we
are an active and industrious people, yet we sleep a
great deal. For as our laws forbid the use of
lamps or torches, except for the use of those toiling
(01:25):
in the dark chambers, it is not possible for us
to ruin our health by turning night into day. We
go to bed the very moment the river of light
ceases to flow. The only ailment that ever gives me
the least trouble is I bury Euphrosenian pray. What is
the nature of that ailment, I asked. It is an
inclination to be too happy, replied doctor Nebulosis gravely. And
(01:49):
I regret to say that several of our people attacked
with this ailment have shortened their lives by refusing to
take my remedies. It usually develops very slowly, beginning with
an inclination to giggle, which after a while is succeeded
by violent fits of laughter. For instance, little Baron when
thou earnest among us, many of our people were attacked
with a violent form of I bary euphrosna. And although
(02:12):
Master Cold Soul, the Court Depressor made great efforts to
check it, yet he was quite powerless to do so.
It spread over the city with remarkable rapidity, without knowing why,
our workmen at their work, our children at their play,
our people indoors and out began to laugh and to
be dangerously happy. I made examinations of several of the
worst cases, and discovered that at the rate they were beating,
(02:35):
the hearts of most of them would run down in
a single week. It was terrible. A council was hastily held,
and it was determined to conceal thee and Lord Bulgar
from the public view. But happily my skill got the
upper hand of the attack. Didst increase the number of
pills to be taken? I asked, no, little baron, said
(02:56):
doctor Nebulosis. I increased their size and covered them with
a powder which made them extremely difficult to swallow, and
in this way compelled those taking them to seize their laughing.
But there were a number of cases so violent that
they could not be cured in this way, those I
ordered to be strapped in at the waist with broad belts,
and to have their mouths held pride open with wooden wedges.
(03:19):
As thou mayest understand, this made laughing so difficult that
they speedily gave it up altogether. Ah, little Baron, continued
the wise doctor, with a sigh. That was a sorry
day for the human race when it learned how to laugh.
It is my opinion that we owe this useless agitation
of our bodies to you, people of the upper world.
(03:41):
Exposed as ye were, to piercing winds and biting frosts,
he contracted the habit of shivering to keep warm. And
little by little this shivering habit grew upon you, so
that ye kept up the shivering, whether ye were cold
or not, only ye called it by another name. Now,
my knowledge of the human body teaches me that this
quivering of the flesh is, if very wise, provision of
nature to keep the blood in motion, and in this way,
(04:04):
to save the human body from perishing from the cold.
But why should we quiver when we are happy? Little Baron?
All pleasure is the thought. And yet at the very
moment when we should keep our bodies in as perfect
repose as possible, we begin this ridiculous shivering. Do we
shiver when we look upon the beauties of the river
of light, or listen to sweet music, or gaze upon
(04:25):
the loving countenance of our gracious Queen Alaxa. But worse
than all, little Baron, this senseless quivering and shivering, which
we call laughter, unlike good, deep, long drawn, wholesome size,
empty the lungs of air without filling them again. And
thus do we often see these gigglers and laughers fall
over in fainting fits, absolutely choked by their own wild
(04:48):
and unreasoning action. I have always contended little Baron, that
we alone, of all animals, had the laughing heabit, And
I am now delighted to have my opinion confirmed by
my acquaintance with the wise and dignityied Lord Bulger. Observe him.
He knows quite as well as we what it is
to be pleased, to be amused, to be delighted. But
(05:08):
he doesn't think it necessary to have recourse to fits
of shivering and shuddering. Through the brightened eye, the true
window of the soul, I can see how happy he is.
I can measure his joy, I can take note of
his contentment. I was delighted with this learned discourse of
the gentle doctor Nebulosis, and make notes of it, lest
(05:29):
the points of his argument might escape my memory. The
more pleased was I in that he proved my faithful
bulgar to be so wisely constructed and regulated by nature.
I made particular inquiry of my friends, Sir amber Opake
and Lord Cornercore, as to whether Queen Glaxa ever had
any trouble in governing her people. None, whatever, was the answer.
(05:51):
In many a long year, has it only been necessary
on one or two occasions to summon a micamenke before
the magistrate and examine his heart under a strong light.
The only punishment allowed by our laws is confinement for
a shorter or longer time in one of the dark chambers.
The severest sentence ever known to have been passed by
one of our magistrates was twelve hours in length. But
(06:14):
in all honesty we must admit little baron that falsehood
and deception are unknown amongst us, for the simple reason that,
being transparent, it is impossible for a mccamenke to deceive
a brother without being caught in the act. Therefore, why
make the attempt. The very moment one of us begins
to say one thing while he is thinking another, his
eyes cloud up and betray him, just as the crystal
(06:37):
clear weather glass clouds up at the approach of a
storm in the upper world. But this, of course, little Baron,
is only true of our thoughts. Our laws allow us
to hide our feelings by the use of the black fan.
No one may look upon another's heart unless its owner
wills it. It is a very grave offense for one
micamenk to look through another without that one's permission. But
(06:58):
as thou wilt readily understand, inasmuch as we are by
nature transparent, it is utterly impossible for a marriage to
prove an unhappy one, for the reason that when a
youth declares his love for a maiden, they both have
the right by law to look upon each other's hearts,
and in this way they can tell exactly the strength
of the love they have for each other. This and
(07:19):
many other strange and interesting things did my new friends
Doctor Nebulosis, Sir amber Opake, and Lord Cornercore impart unto me?
And right grateful was I to good Queen Galaxa for
having chosen them for me. Good friends are better than gold,
although we may not think it at the time. End
of Chapter ten,
Chapter ten, A brief account of my conversations with Doctor Nebulosis,
Sir amber Opake, and Lord Cornicor, who tell me many
things that I never knew before, for which I was
very grateful. Lord Bulgar and I were more than pleased
with our new friends, Doctor Nebulosis, Sir amber Opake, and
Lord corncor although so eager were they to make us
(00:20):
thoroughly comfortable that they overdid the matter at times and
left me scarcely a moment to myself in which to
make an entry in my note book. They were extremely solicitous,
lest in my ignorance I should set down something wrong
about them, For said Sir amber Opake. Now that thou
hast found the way to this underworld of ours, little Baron,
I feel assured that we shall have a number of
(00:42):
visitors from thy people every year or so, and I
have already issued orders to have extra beds made as
soon as the wood can be quarried. Doctor Nebulosis gave
me a very interesting account of the various ailments which
the Macamenkes suffer from, all sickness among our people. Little
Baron said, he is pure mental or emotional, that is,
of the mind or feelings, there is no such thing
(01:04):
as bodily infirmity among us. Wine and strong drink are
unknown in our world, and the food we eat is
light and easily digested. We are never exposed to the
danger of breathing a dust laden atmosphere. And while we
are an active and industrious people, yet we sleep a
great deal. For as our laws forbid the use of
lamps or torches, except for the use of those toiling
(01:25):
in the dark chambers, it is not possible for us
to ruin our health by turning night into day. We
go to bed the very moment the river of light
ceases to flow. The only ailment that ever gives me
the least trouble is I bury Euphrosenian pray. What is
the nature of that ailment, I asked. It is an
inclination to be too happy, replied doctor Nebulosis gravely. And
(01:49):
I regret to say that several of our people attacked
with this ailment have shortened their lives by refusing to
take my remedies. It usually develops very slowly, beginning with
an inclination to giggle, which after a while is succeeded
by violent fits of laughter. For instance, little Baron when
thou earnest among us, many of our people were attacked
with a violent form of I bary euphrosna. And although
(02:12):
Master Cold Soul, the Court Depressor made great efforts to
check it, yet he was quite powerless to do so.
It spread over the city with remarkable rapidity, without knowing why,
our workmen at their work, our children at their play,
our people indoors and out began to laugh and to
be dangerously happy. I made examinations of several of the
worst cases, and discovered that at the rate they were beating,
(02:35):
the hearts of most of them would run down in
a single week. It was terrible. A council was hastily held,
and it was determined to conceal thee and Lord Bulgar
from the public view. But happily my skill got the
upper hand of the attack. Didst increase the number of
pills to be taken? I asked, no, little baron, said
(02:56):
doctor Nebulosis. I increased their size and covered them with
a powder which made them extremely difficult to swallow, and
in this way compelled those taking them to seize their laughing.
But there were a number of cases so violent that
they could not be cured in this way, those I
ordered to be strapped in at the waist with broad belts,
and to have their mouths held pride open with wooden wedges.
(03:19):
As thou mayest understand, this made laughing so difficult that
they speedily gave it up altogether. Ah, little Baron, continued
the wise doctor, with a sigh. That was a sorry
day for the human race when it learned how to laugh.
It is my opinion that we owe this useless agitation
of our bodies to you, people of the upper world.
(03:41):
Exposed as ye were, to piercing winds and biting frosts,
he contracted the habit of shivering to keep warm. And
little by little this shivering habit grew upon you, so
that ye kept up the shivering, whether ye were cold
or not, only ye called it by another name. Now,
my knowledge of the human body teaches me that this
quivering of the flesh is, if very wise, provision of
nature to keep the blood in motion, and in this way,
(04:04):
to save the human body from perishing from the cold.
But why should we quiver when we are happy? Little Baron?
All pleasure is the thought. And yet at the very
moment when we should keep our bodies in as perfect
repose as possible, we begin this ridiculous shivering. Do we
shiver when we look upon the beauties of the river
of light, or listen to sweet music, or gaze upon
(04:25):
the loving countenance of our gracious Queen Alaxa. But worse
than all, little Baron, this senseless quivering and shivering, which
we call laughter, unlike good, deep, long drawn, wholesome size,
empty the lungs of air without filling them again. And
thus do we often see these gigglers and laughers fall
over in fainting fits, absolutely choked by their own wild
(04:48):
and unreasoning action. I have always contended little Baron, that
we alone, of all animals, had the laughing heabit, And
I am now delighted to have my opinion confirmed by
my acquaintance with the wise and dignityied Lord Bulger. Observe him.
He knows quite as well as we what it is
to be pleased, to be amused, to be delighted. But
(05:08):
he doesn't think it necessary to have recourse to fits
of shivering and shuddering. Through the brightened eye, the true
window of the soul, I can see how happy he is.
I can measure his joy, I can take note of
his contentment. I was delighted with this learned discourse of
the gentle doctor Nebulosis, and make notes of it, lest
(05:29):
the points of his argument might escape my memory. The
more pleased was I in that he proved my faithful
bulgar to be so wisely constructed and regulated by nature.
I made particular inquiry of my friends, Sir amber Opake
and Lord Cornercore, as to whether Queen Glaxa ever had
any trouble in governing her people. None, whatever, was the answer.
(05:51):
In many a long year, has it only been necessary
on one or two occasions to summon a micamenke before
the magistrate and examine his heart under a strong light.
The only punishment allowed by our laws is confinement for
a shorter or longer time in one of the dark chambers.
The severest sentence ever known to have been passed by
one of our magistrates was twelve hours in length. But
(06:14):
in all honesty we must admit little baron that falsehood
and deception are unknown amongst us, for the simple reason that,
being transparent, it is impossible for a mccamenke to deceive
a brother without being caught in the act. Therefore, why
make the attempt. The very moment one of us begins
to say one thing while he is thinking another, his
eyes cloud up and betray him, just as the crystal
(06:37):
clear weather glass clouds up at the approach of a
storm in the upper world. But this, of course, little Baron,
is only true of our thoughts. Our laws allow us
to hide our feelings by the use of the black fan.
No one may look upon another's heart unless its owner
wills it. It is a very grave offense for one
micamenk to look through another without that one's permission. But
(06:58):
as thou wilt readily understand, inasmuch as we are by
nature transparent, it is utterly impossible for a marriage to
prove an unhappy one, for the reason that when a
youth declares his love for a maiden, they both have
the right by law to look upon each other's hearts,
and in this way they can tell exactly the strength
of the love they have for each other. This and
(07:19):
many other strange and interesting things did my new friends
Doctor Nebulosis, Sir amber Opake, and Lord Cornercore impart unto me?
And right grateful was I to good Queen Galaxa for
having chosen them for me. Good friends are better than gold,
although we may not think it at the time. End
of Chapter ten,
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