One-Shot-arama! | A Crossroad Guild Adventures One Shot

Join us for a Futurama inspired one shot, as the intrepid crew of Cosmic Carriers go off on another thrilling adventure! 

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hello everyone. Well, we were supposed to do a trailer
park Man, but I put a curse on Jeff after
the last session and he is at home with bronchitis.
So you're listening to this Jeff, which you're probably not
get well soon.

Speaker 2 (00:19):
Where did you get that shirt?

Speaker 3 (00:21):
My shirt?

Speaker 1 (00:22):
Yes? Oh yeah, I actually bought this today up at
UH up at hot Topic. I am currently wearing a
Delicious and Dungeon shirt that looks like a Chef Boy
r D label with lios so that says, uh, let's
eat the monsters.

Speaker 2 (00:39):
Just notice that.

Speaker 1 (00:40):
Yeah, so yeah, So due to this, we are doing
a one shot. Jeff decided not to appear because she
does not want to be a part of this fun
campaign because we are doing a Futurama good as campaign.
So good news everyone, so as we uh. The point

(01:02):
of this is, UH are two characters of Yancy Nancy
Hornbuckle and Meet you got last name? No? Okay?

Speaker 3 (01:14):
Share?

Speaker 1 (01:15):
Okay?

Speaker 4 (01:15):
You like share Meet you go can find out later
and you know card right, go to confused yet aroused by.

Speaker 1 (01:28):
You go to uh try to go get a job
at the cost to one of the guilds local businesses,
the Cosmic Express.

Speaker 2 (01:36):
Why do we have to work for the guild again.

Speaker 1 (01:38):
It's always part of the gut hell with the Guild.

Speaker 2 (01:41):
It's going to the Cosmic Express because we can't find
work elsewhere.

Speaker 1 (01:47):
It's a subsidiary. It's a business.

Speaker 3 (01:51):
Was like mom corb.

Speaker 1 (01:52):
Yeah, so so you all, so as you two slowly, uh,
you guys are out in the middle of this gigantic
like built like you're in a town. You're in a
gigantic town, slowly heading towards like this giant this huge

(02:14):
built like huge carrier. What was a carrier or is
it a carrier? Trying warehouse? This giant ware like, Uh,
help me out here. Hanger fucking hanger. That's the it's
it looks like a mix between a hangar and a
and a warehouse.

Speaker 3 (02:33):
That's why he's doing the Star Trek one.

Speaker 1 (02:35):
Yeah, I can't think of words at the moment.

Speaker 2 (02:38):
You saw a big it's a big boat in space.
It's it's a it's a.

Speaker 1 (02:46):
I'd like the boat. So we could do a Treasure
Planet esque one. We'll do that one later. Yeah, we'll
do that later.

Speaker 3 (02:55):
Yeah, activate the propellers and go to hyper speed.

Speaker 1 (03:01):
So as you like, you will engage you all watch
you all get to a like this looks like a
giant eric crat. You guys, you got hangar. You guys
gotta be screwed up.

Speaker 3 (03:16):
Now up, I think you come to us that way
damage product.

Speaker 1 (03:23):
To this hangar and you all begin to knock. You
see a four hire sign in the door of the hanger,
and you all decide to go in. When you as
you all walk in, you see this nice little open
area like you see uh, it looks like your normal

(03:43):
waiting room that you would expect. It looks like you're
walked into a little post office. There's like some tables
and chairs, some papers to fill out. You see nice
little things with packages. You see scales. Then you see
the giant spaceship behind everything, and you and this old
man walks up say hello everyone, what hell? How can

(04:07):
I insist you to today?

Speaker 2 (04:10):
We're here for the help want It's oh.

Speaker 1 (04:12):
Yes, good, good good, We definitely need those. Now come
come tell me about yourselves. Introduce yourselves to me.

Speaker 3 (04:22):
Well, I'm Michiko, and right now, there's not a whole
lot of work for a guide. I mainly help people
in areas that have a lot of beasts and animals
and all that how good.

Speaker 1 (04:35):
Are you at surviving those things?

Speaker 3 (04:39):
I'm still alive.

Speaker 1 (04:40):
Good, good, good, that's very good. Indeed, I've definitely been
needing someone who can survive the treacherous piles of my
delivery company. Now, what what about you, good sir.

Speaker 2 (04:53):
I'm a anty hornbuckle. I've seen someone death and destruction,
so many men and animals and monsters. I've left the
army and now I'm trying to work as a paladin.
But paladin doesn't pay too much.

Speaker 1 (05:11):
Good, good, good. We need a good, strong someone here
to protect the others, especially after what happened to the
last crew. What happened to the last crew, Oh, terrible,
terrible things. I don't want to talk about it. And
as you see the as you see the the uh,
the owner of the place just kind of space out,

(05:33):
and you like in his mind you can hear flashbacks
and yelling and like bees bumbling and screams of others, and.

Speaker 2 (05:41):
Causes me to have a PTS flash as well. So
we're just both standing there, eyes wide up.

Speaker 3 (05:50):
I'm looking around the conclusion between the two of you, going, uh, I.

Speaker 2 (05:55):
Think we're projecting our flashmacs.

Speaker 3 (05:57):
On each other.

Speaker 1 (05:58):
But yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, like I'm
we're we're just so shorthanded here, so like you you're
you're hired. So here, come, come, come, come up, Like
I am a like that I was saying, this is
just a hobby of mine, like as like I am
more deal with scientific aspects of the world. I'm a scientist,

(06:20):
you see, and I hobby as the owner delivery company. Yes,
it's something, it's something that helps pay the bills.

Speaker 2 (06:28):
I guess it.

Speaker 1 (06:31):
Does help pay the bills. But come, let me show
you my desk. And he takes you over to like
this this odd little like desk where like you see
like like slews of paper, pencils, you see like diagrams
of some of his inventions and stuff. And then he
pulls out to and this is my a sordid drawer

(06:54):
of wire.

Speaker 2 (06:57):
That's some nice wires in there.

Speaker 1 (06:59):
Yes, yes, I take very good, very good care of
my assorted wire. Shuts it off and he and he
just kind of shuffles along to the next it's a
here like first off, you're all going to need to
see our our physician. And he opens the door and
you see this grotesque like hippos creature. It looks like

(07:25):
like a hippo man and like it's fat flabby. Think
of like you've seem like your animomorphic like hippo's out
of cartoons. Just think of that, but ren and stimpy
art style. And he just and he just looks at yourself.
Oh yes, yes, all, professor, do you do you have

(07:48):
new new experiments for me? And he just looks like
I said no, no, no, I just need to inspect him,
and it's like we don't he eat the harvest their organs.
Later they're still alive though, He said, wow, excellent, excellent,
and you all and you uh, I said, ah, so

(08:10):
we what what brace were you? Either?

Speaker 2 (08:12):
You're a human?

Speaker 3 (08:12):
Human? You're a human?

Speaker 1 (08:13):
Asaid, oh yes, I I'm not the best at human anatomy.
But we we we we shall see. He takes a
has stethoscope, puts it up to his ear and he
just uh and he starts listening to uh to your crotch.
So yes, I'll take a deep breath from me.

Speaker 2 (08:32):
This is the weirdest examination I've ever had.

Speaker 1 (08:38):
I heard nothing, and then he just grabbed you start
something again. He just grabbed your chest and said, huh
I hear something here, but I'm not I'm not dealing
where the heart was supposed to be. Huh, but you're
breathing hmmm, peculiar, he said. It looks over at you.

(08:58):
It's a pixie. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, you're
not You're not a pixie. He just kind of leans in.
He takes a whiff a fairy. Oh, yes, it's been
a long time since i've you.

Speaker 3 (09:13):
By chance, wouldn't happen to have any credentials laying around
that I could take a look at, would you?

Speaker 1 (09:19):
He said, Why, yes, I've actually studied at the finest,
finest establishment. He points over to a diploma written in
crayon that says Coney Island, Coney Island College.

Speaker 2 (09:32):
I went there, Go white Fish, Go white Fish. It's
like at an accredited college or maybe is that?

Speaker 1 (09:46):
But you do seem to to be okay. Takes it
like it takes a like a long weird whiff, especially
like as a hippo. And he's just like, but as
he gets close, you smell this man you smell.

Speaker 3 (10:01):
Gets close to me and sniffs on flap of his nose.
Now it's like that's saying he like you. He smells you.

Speaker 1 (10:07):
But then you finally get a whiff of him. It
is pure rank garbage upon all and like it's like
you have you like you've traveled for a long time
and you've smelled some terrible horrors, but this is on
a whole new level.

Speaker 3 (10:24):
I roll.

Speaker 1 (10:25):
I need you to roll a constitution uh saving throat
saving pass out? What you get one?

Speaker 3 (10:47):
I have a plus three constitutions.

Speaker 1 (10:51):
You just you just fall to foot.

Speaker 3 (10:53):
I feel like I just I've become unconscious and I
just like a leaf just it's just kinda pull.

Speaker 1 (11:00):
I can leave it, just float down to the thing.
It's just like huh. He just guys like kind of
lifts his arm up. I smell fine. He walks over
to you, Yancy, he pulled like clets his armor dust smell. Okay,
I need you to roll a constitution saving.

Speaker 5 (11:20):
Throat ship two No twelve, I have a one plus
one constitution.

Speaker 2 (11:31):
Okay, that's say you you mean you smell pretty fucking bad? Doc.

Speaker 1 (11:38):
No, no, no, no no, it must be must be
that open window and just walks away and like it
kind of just as as he walks, you come back.
You come to Sam and you, oh.

Speaker 3 (11:48):
My god, what happened? Why doesn't my sign is cavity
on fire.

Speaker 1 (11:54):
It's the The professor looks at you and said, good good,
Now come come we we we must show the other people.
And so we got to get your get your time
cards and stuff punched in and ready we must fill
out some paperwork and we must see our local bureaucrat.
As he shuffles away, you all follow along, uh, you

(12:16):
as you as he shuffles through, he he goes through,
like a door opens up and you see a break room.
Now you see a TV, you see like, you see
a couch, you see a table, you see a like what?

Speaker 2 (12:30):
Well, in all my circuits, that's my favorite show. It's
have you ever seen all my circuits with capulan? You're
missing out.

Speaker 3 (12:44):
I assume there's probably a lot of references so far
that I have no clue on.

Speaker 1 (12:49):
As as he like shovels like through the break room
and all that you like you see? Uh, the equivalent
to whatever All my circuits is when you think of
something clever for later. The young in the cordless, Yeah,
they're young in the cordless, so young in the cordless
playing and uh and you see uh Computron, Computron, the

(13:13):
world's greatest actor playing like playing his lead role as Concarnate,
So counts Concarnate a squire.

Speaker 2 (13:28):
The looks.

Speaker 1 (13:30):
He brings you to a room. That says uh, that
says dermis. He opened the you open the door like,
and he brings in and you see this very well
kept man. He is a little dark skinned, long hair

(13:52):
and it takes a second to realize, but come to
find out that this man is indeed human. You wouldn't
look like it from long hair because you mistake him
for a h for like a sasquatch. You know what,
he's sasquatch. He sat like you. You basically see sasquatch. Yeah,
well draft kept sasquatch. He just looks over and goes,

(14:15):
oh a processor. Yeah ah, dermys. We we have new
employees to come down. We need to fill out their
paperwork and just yes, yes, now then like I don't
know where, he says, hold on, yes, yes, thank you.

(14:38):
Now all you need to do is just sign here here, here,
and we will get you all in order. Yeah, you
don't need to worry about everything else. This is more
for the liability that saves the company. Such plays for
your funerals, down your pay. He'll be uh and it's like,
do you all want to check the contracts and see
what's in there? See any new poles you see.

Speaker 2 (15:01):
Like a trustworthy guy, I'll go ahead and side.

Speaker 3 (15:05):
I want to check the contracts.

Speaker 1 (15:06):
Okay, roll for a role for an intelligence?

Speaker 2 (15:19):
Can you even read it? Or I know some of
these words.

Speaker 1 (15:27):
It's either you've had a long day or watts but
you just kind of look at us. I go, m h, yes,
I know this word. Yes, because you don't want to
make yourself feel stupid in front of your new co
workers and seem like you are the dumbest one here because,
let's say, because you were a well respected guide for

(15:50):
the longest time. You're like, okay, do you choose the sign.

Speaker 3 (15:59):
I'll go ahead, side, and I really need to pay.
Times are tough, you do. It doesn't take much to
feed a fairy. I don't need a lot of food. Good.
I guess you're gambling.

Speaker 2 (16:13):
Adding I know a lot of fairies that are they
they gamble? Why it's problem?

Speaker 3 (16:19):
Yeah, I actually don't gamble. No, I don't gamble. I
don't drink.

Speaker 1 (16:23):
I don't smoke gambles with people's laughs though.

Speaker 3 (16:27):
I just like to help people.

Speaker 1 (16:31):
Good, good, good, no, no, no, that this is done.
We need to meet like good now we got your
side him. Now we need to talk to our captain.
The the the are they are well seasoned captain. I
just hired him yesterday. And you all walk and you
see this well kemped alien creature. We you're not for

(16:53):
sure what type he is, but he is he like
he is a large red crustacean esque creature. Actually, what
was the creature from What's what's the the guy from
Star Trek? What's what's the species?

Speaker 3 (17:12):
Which guy?

Speaker 1 (17:14):
Gorn? YEA, Yeah, you see a spian esque creature, tall red,
very dapper, and you see on his name tag goodbr
He looks he just he just kind of looks at
you both, doesn't say anything and just nods his head

(17:38):
and he hands you too, and he hands you both
two shot glasses.

Speaker 2 (17:42):
This guy's gorgeous head of hair I ever seen in
my entire wife.

Speaker 1 (17:46):
Yes, and it is long, flowing, it's it is god
like golden brant. Like it's kind of a mix up, autumn.

Speaker 2 (17:54):
You're gonna tell me your your hair your haircare secrets.

Speaker 1 (17:58):
He just looks at you and he just kind of
wing sect and said, I get what you're saying.

Speaker 3 (18:07):
Kind of float on over to him, and I just
started like rubbing his hair.

Speaker 1 (18:10):
And you like it kind of everything just goes in
slow mo as he does that, like you know, like
and he just kind of walks over and jumps into
a pool swim like swims around for a second and
then it kind of just pulls out and you just
hear music playing. Don't don't don't like us, you just

(18:33):
like you just see you're like, man, I can't say no,
and he.

Speaker 3 (18:38):
Just walks up.

Speaker 1 (18:38):
He just like that slow mo shakes his hair and
like when he's done, it just goes back to perfect.

Speaker 3 (18:46):
It's very silky soft.

Speaker 2 (18:49):
I want, I want, I want to clothe myself with
his hair.

Speaker 1 (18:55):
It's so good now it's a good.

Speaker 2 (18:57):
Goes to sleep once got at all.

Speaker 3 (19:01):
But that wouldn't be the right thing to you. It
would for us, how so, unless we're going to donate
it to like to like for cancer wigs. I have cancer.

Speaker 2 (19:14):
I need a wig.

Speaker 3 (19:15):
That's what kind of cancer do you got?

Speaker 6 (19:18):
Yes?

Speaker 3 (19:22):
Uh, okay, we'll cut it off when he's a sleep later,
which wouldn't we get his consent.

Speaker 2 (19:31):
I'm sure he'll be okay with it.

Speaker 3 (19:33):
He seems like a good guy if you get it
to me and we're writing.

Speaker 2 (19:38):
Okay, pull out, turn around and pull up my my
ink and quill, and.

Speaker 3 (19:45):
I gloric what you know what?

Speaker 1 (19:49):
Roll like he's hearing this the whole time. Roll a
perception check to see if he consents to this. Ye,
see if he will give you some of.

Speaker 2 (20:00):
His hair perception No, no, no, persuasion, persuasion, And.

Speaker 1 (20:13):
He immediately just like just uh it is. He just
kind of looks at you and he goes like gives
you this look of compassion and just pull like and
just looks at the professor and it's like, oh, yes,
give me, give me, give me one second. Cork, and
he just kind of shovels over like and you kind
of hear it, just like a little shuffling like weird.

(20:39):
He comes and you hear like he.

Speaker 3 (20:41):
Comes back a reception handpoot and see what kind of
rules they have here?

Speaker 1 (20:45):
He comes back out and he has a cordless razor
and he just gives it colork and glork gives just
shaves all of his head of hair like it just
gives it, gives it like splits it in half and
gives it both to you, and then like he.

Speaker 3 (21:00):
Hair weighs me down and I fall to the floor
covered in hair, grab his stuffing all my.

Speaker 1 (21:05):
Bag and then it just kind of looks like just
kind of out of nowhere. Then he just like like
in a matter of it, he just kind of looks
over to the side and you and O don't know
where you feel a gust of wind and magically the
boom the hair comes back and it just starts flowing
in the wind and it's like, good, now that that's over.

Speaker 3 (21:28):
We need to talk. I'm on the floor and I've
got the like pleasant boots eyes going, oh my god.

Speaker 2 (21:34):
So the wind has triggered with PTSD flashback and your
flag waving over a pile of dead bodies a battle.

Speaker 3 (21:44):
I flowed up. Pat you on the tour? Are you
all right?

Speaker 7 (21:48):
No?

Speaker 2 (21:50):
So much?

Speaker 1 (21:51):
Dad?

Speaker 3 (21:52):
Do you want to talk about it?

Speaker 1 (21:54):
No?

Speaker 2 (21:56):
Okay, I am fine.

Speaker 3 (21:57):
Now, okay, well that was quick.

Speaker 1 (22:01):
It comes and it goes and it's like, good, no,
that you have met our captain. We we we need
to we need to talk to a mechanic and like
and you just and as he takes you down the steps,
we will need to come up with a map for
the for like for the building, Yeah, for the building.

(22:21):
As he he shuffles down the steps ends up tripping,
you just hear him rolling.

Speaker 8 (22:27):
Oh oh my, just shouldn't you help him?

Speaker 3 (22:38):
You like helping people, a couple of people, but I
also like to live. He He's like, I, boy, how
big are faeries usually?

Speaker 1 (22:47):
And you're about like maybe a foot and a half something.

Speaker 3 (22:51):
That's actually a little bit bigger. I was thinking. I
was so yeah, okay, I was putting myself like that's okay.

Speaker 2 (22:58):
That's my cag like six to two. So you're like
a foot and a half tall. You could, like you
can just sit on my shoulder like a parrot.

Speaker 3 (23:07):
Okay, So I'm going to fly down these stairs and
try to catch him.

Speaker 9 (23:11):
Yea, let me see fairy if a r the professor
is like one hundred and seventy years old, he can't
wait too much. Let me see your traits you are.
You're small, so you're about like one two foot or
something like that. That's saying, and that's saying as he's rolling,
he gets to the top, Like once he gets to

(23:32):
the bottom of the stairs, he magically lands on his feet.

Speaker 1 (23:34):
And it just keeps on walking.

Speaker 3 (23:37):
Okay, that that that was odd. He's very nimble for
an old man.

Speaker 1 (23:44):
As you all get closer to the jet, to the UH,
to the ship, you start hearing the uh. Hear the
wailing of a hammer like on the UH on the ship,
and you see a figure on just uh just hammering away.
And then I'll know where you see a bright light

(24:05):
as a as welding equipment is lit up onto the
side and you just hear BackStar, BackStar, BackStar. We got
new employees? Is it?

Speaker 3 (24:23):
What?

Speaker 1 (24:24):
What? What? What do you what do you want? Professor?

Speaker 2 (24:30):
What was that?

Speaker 1 (24:31):
We got new employees?

Speaker 3 (24:34):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (24:35):
Oh, okay, m hm okay, give me a second there.
My name's Baxter. I'm a mechanic.

Speaker 2 (24:45):
I've never met you before.

Speaker 1 (24:47):
Now I haven't heard met you either. I am the
I'm the mechanic of this place. I kind of keep
everything in order, trying to keep the ship and stop
trying to keep the ship in shape. I also next year.

Speaker 2 (25:03):
That's a nice washbucket next to you.

Speaker 1 (25:05):
That that's my washbucket. I used to make sure this
place is clean about the end of the night. This
that's my body washbucket. Her her name is Claire the washbucket.

Speaker 2 (25:18):
I had a washbucket named Janis, but I lost her
at the Battle of Gorbash.

Speaker 1 (25:23):
Oh, I've heard of Gorbash. Man, that's I have to
I have to shake your.

Speaker 2 (25:27):
Hand so much.

Speaker 3 (25:28):
D I just pat you on the back.

Speaker 2 (25:35):
What was that?

Speaker 1 (25:38):
So?

Speaker 2 (25:39):
Who are you? I've never met you before.

Speaker 1 (25:41):
I haven't met you either. My name is Max Star.
Who are you? I'm are you the Are you the
nephew of General Hornbuckle.

Speaker 2 (25:52):
I'm his second cousin, twice removed on his mother's side.

Speaker 1 (25:55):
I served with with General Hornbuckle on the on the
Battle Wolf of Five Valleys, about.

Speaker 2 (26:03):
All five valleys. I was there and killed a lot
of people. It was a fun day.

Speaker 1 (26:09):
Must have been nice where you were at. I don't
remember much of that, but I will.

Speaker 2 (26:14):
Say this, we played volleyball with a severed head.

Speaker 1 (26:20):
Well. Well, well, welcome board to both of you now.
As I saying, I hope you all know what you're
in for. I've been here for years. BackStar believes in
this company. I've been a member for for many years,
and I hope, I hope you all do well better

(26:41):
than the last one, especially after the the last crew.
What happened to the last crew, Oh, well, much not
didn't much didn't survive the time we were attacked in
space by you see it like his his whiskers slowly

(27:02):
start to turn whites as as a remember as he
starts to remember all the it was the space whale bees,
giant beat whales mixed with hybrid bees. It was terrible.
They've just come out of nowhere once you hit their hive.
All but they wanted the honey we had. We had

(27:23):
to reach it, but we got stuck. But we barely
made it out of love. But one of those fools
brought brought one on the ship and it ended up
taking over and killing both of them. I barely made
it out alive. We lost the ship, but we had
to build a new one. So oh, anyway, welcome to

(27:49):
Welcome to Cosmic Cosmic Packaging.

Speaker 2 (27:55):
Is it cosmic packaging, cosmic carriers or cosmic Express? We've
heard a lot.

Speaker 1 (28:00):
O cosmic courriers. Yeah, I'm sorry, there's a lot of
Like we're one of the better of the actors, but
there's so many.

Speaker 2 (28:09):
I bet they changed their LLC every six months to
avoid taxes.

Speaker 10 (28:13):
Mm hmm.

Speaker 3 (28:15):
I think we need to contact the Better Business Bureau
to check for all iterations of their name, wetting our
beaks a little bit.

Speaker 1 (28:26):
Well, you're you're more than we hoping to plunder where
we go.

Speaker 2 (28:30):
But plunder, yeah, plunder thunder.

Speaker 1 (28:35):
Well, we we do go to some like extravagant places
on some of these deliveries. I remember one of the
crew there's one point they became a king of a
planet drinking some jellyfield people. But uh, I think.

Speaker 2 (28:54):
That planet it's called quad Soles, really hot.

Speaker 1 (28:58):
Yeah it was. Indeed, I really quenched it thirst, but
I wo don't I don't recommend it. Don't drink bring
your own bottled water there, the uh said the like
the professor starts going, oh, good, good, here, you're you're
very well acquainted with each other. Now, now let us

(29:20):
go and see what we have. He as he just
kind of want kind of wiggle wiggles off. You're just
saying you try to see him, Like he puts his
arms up like little dinosaur arms and just kind of
wo wiggles away. He said, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
Baxter just kind of looks back. Yeah. Just the professor

(29:43):
is he's a good man, but he's a little bit
of a quack. Just as long as you do what
you're told and come back with the do your job.
He pays, well, put my kids to college that way,

(30:03):
And and you all begin to follow. Seeing a he
leads you to a giant round table and you see
other members of the of the crew. Here, you see
the doctor, you see you see Ermys.

Speaker 2 (30:23):
Did we name the doctor?

Speaker 1 (30:24):
I don't think we did. No, he's just the doctor.

Speaker 2 (30:27):
Now he's our boss. We don't even know whose name is.

Speaker 1 (30:30):
That said good. I am the professor, but you may
call me the professor. Yes, yes, yes, says he said,
what and so do you do you all have any
questions for me the professor?

Speaker 2 (30:47):
Yes?

Speaker 3 (30:48):
What am I actually doing here?

Speaker 1 (30:50):
Your all's job is to take these packages that we
are that are hired, and is to take them and
deliver them. So there's points we have been called to
battlefields to deliver packages to soldiers in need. There's been
times we have had to deliver move like movie theater
popcorn to the popcorn to the theater planet.

Speaker 2 (31:14):
We movie theater popcorn, the Battle of Popcorn.

Speaker 1 (31:22):
Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes yes. Your ural's job
is to make sure the package gets where it needs
to go. So your your job as the guide is
to make to guide unlike our deliver to and he
points and he points over to this young man who

(31:44):
with with the radiant purple hair, and he looks young
and it's just like hi, I and then out of
nowhere you just see, out of nowhere, a rock just
hits him and he's dead.

Speaker 3 (31:58):
Oh my, oh my, oh.

Speaker 2 (32:00):
No, where did the rock come from?

Speaker 1 (32:02):
Smash the ceiling, smashed the ceiling and just lands its
Oh no, that's no good, random stranger. No no, that's
not no, that's not good at all. BackStar, what I'm
gonna need you to go on the delivery with him?
Oh no, not again?

Speaker 3 (32:25):
Can I cast spare the dying on this poorshole?

Speaker 1 (32:30):
Go ahead?

Speaker 2 (32:32):
Oh I go?

Speaker 1 (32:35):
And you don't need to use a.

Speaker 2 (32:38):
Oh god's awesome.

Speaker 1 (32:40):
What did you do? Howbut you roll a hundred? It
just doesn't all, yeah, it does.

Speaker 2 (32:50):
That's fantastic.

Speaker 1 (32:52):
Yeah. So let's say he's just like he like the
the kids. Just he's back, barely on the brink of death.
He said, I'm okay, I'm okay, don't worry about me,
how like the doctor will take care of me.

Speaker 3 (33:07):
Yes, yes, good good, we'll.

Speaker 2 (33:11):
Have so.

Speaker 1 (33:14):
And he just kind of waddles over at all he
waddles over and while will do that, I'll give you
a hair cut.

Speaker 3 (33:24):
He just lifts over.

Speaker 1 (33:26):
He just lifts the rock over, talks it to the side,
and just picks up the boy's body and just wanting
just walks away to his to his lab and you
just there.

Speaker 3 (33:40):
But I don't think we're seeing him. I probably shouldn't
have cast that the way he think it would have
been kinder. Yeah, it would have been kinder. Just let
him out of his misery. But what have I done?

Speaker 1 (33:55):
But anyway, we have a package to the deliver over
to neutron twel it's saying, luckily it is relatively safe
with all the utonium, ukrainium and Dolomites.

Speaker 3 (34:12):
Wait, he said, they have elements. But what do you
mean by they have elements? Like shut outs every planet Dolomites,
the Battle of Dolomite we suffered.

Speaker 1 (34:24):
Yes, and but also but the main exports is robots. People,
Because I'm saying, that's where like the that's where the
robot factories and stuff are. And we need you to
take this box. And he pulls, like lifts up this
box and just ship sets it on the table and
the whole table just shakes like it was like this

(34:45):
box is like it's like this box has a universe
and it is heavy to hit, like beyond compare. And
it's just like I need you to take this box
of gears and deliver it to this address. And he
gives you a a sheet of paper. He gives you, Hey,
I think I forgot your old names. Uh ship, you're

(35:08):
you're Yancy and Meetchiko. He looks over he is, I
don't think I've ever met this fairy before.

Speaker 2 (35:17):
It's meetch you go.

Speaker 1 (35:19):
Oh yes, mechi go, my old friend. He looks over
at a backstars. I've never met this Barry in my
whole life. But yes, yes, yes, good, let's let us
venture to our great spaceship.

Speaker 3 (35:35):
You know I know a fairy at all. Every time
he says fairy, I feel like I need to contact hr.

Speaker 2 (35:42):
Yeah. Yeah, he says fairy with a hard r.

Speaker 1 (35:44):
Yeah. And it's like so and then and Gork just
looks over at both of you, just nods his head
and just starts like like just starts walking towards the
towards the ship. But like when as you look at him,

(36:06):
it looks like it's like that scene like the scene
from like the astronaut movies like where they're just walking
towards the ship and it's just like you. You can
hear I don't know where you can hear patriotic music.
As he just gets closer to the ship, it feels
like he's going slow motion.

Speaker 2 (36:22):
I don't know about you, but I think Glork cops
way too fucking much.

Speaker 3 (36:25):
I know he won't because what got here. He hasn't
stopped talking.

Speaker 1 (36:32):
You all inter you all enter the ship and just
and and you all begin to like and like as
Gorn just starts hitting hitting ship like switches and stuff.

Speaker 3 (36:44):
You just Gork.

Speaker 2 (36:46):
Who's Who's Gork? Who's gorky? Gord? I thought our shoot Captain.

Speaker 3 (36:53):
Glory and Gork.

Speaker 1 (36:58):
They are too parents. Here are two parents that like
like that just start flying around the ship and just
magically and just land on Glork's shoulders.

Speaker 3 (37:13):
Gorn, Gork and Glorn.

Speaker 2 (37:20):
This is a weird job, but I need money.

Speaker 3 (37:24):
Mm hmm.

Speaker 1 (37:28):
You just say you hear the uh you you hear
like footsteps and out of breath.

Speaker 3 (37:35):
Oh oh give me, give me a second.

Speaker 1 (37:39):
I'm out.

Speaker 3 (37:41):
It's been alone day.

Speaker 1 (37:42):
And backstars out of breath. Okay, okay, Glork, let's let's
get this into hot ear and the ship takes off
into space, off to Neutron twelve. You all look, you
all decide to look around the spaceship. You see the

(38:07):
ship itself seems to be a large size. We're talking
about probably the size of the link of a football field.

Speaker 2 (38:17):
Question though, is there a giant canoe?

Speaker 1 (38:21):
You look like you look over and h you see
the You see a door saying kitchen.

Speaker 2 (38:29):
Oh kind of hungry?

Speaker 3 (38:30):
Are you hungry?

Speaker 2 (38:34):
Death? I wanna go in the kitchen.

Speaker 1 (38:36):
You're gonna go into the kitchen and roll for a
roll for investigation?

Speaker 3 (38:41):
M hm, what.

Speaker 1 (38:46):
He went to the kitchen?

Speaker 3 (38:47):
Where do you go?

Speaker 1 (38:49):
Oh think he went to the kitchen. He said he
was getting hungry.

Speaker 2 (38:53):
Oh shit, what was it? Fifteen? You see you.

Speaker 1 (39:03):
See a fully stopped kitchen, you know, like it is
like you would think, like like you wouldn't expect it.
But it's fully stocked like in like with everything brand
spanking new on the side you see. But on the
side you see like a giant can opener to the wall.

Speaker 2 (39:27):
But you want a giant can opening.

Speaker 1 (39:29):
But you see somebody in it, something metallic in it,
and a can opener. Something metallic is in this can opener.

Speaker 2 (39:38):
Stuck to it, stuck to it. I'll do an investigation. H. Thirteen.

Speaker 1 (39:50):
You see arms and legs protrude like just kind of
protruding it from from the top of it, and it
just kind of kind of like that really moves, but
it's kind of twitching and you hear something coming from it.
Do you try to pull it out?

Speaker 2 (40:12):
Yes, yes, I do. Maybe a strength check.

Speaker 1 (40:19):
You have to do a straight check to see if
you can pull it out so you can fight them,
so you can fight the magnet.

Speaker 3 (40:28):
Ten ten.

Speaker 1 (40:30):
You pull as hard as you can, but you can't.
But but you think maybe if I get some help.

Speaker 2 (40:38):
He means you go from here in the kitchen. I
heard something.

Speaker 1 (40:49):
I think he's hard for you over in the kitchen.

Speaker 2 (40:52):
Oh, what do you want? Can help me with this thing?

Speaker 3 (40:57):
Okay, I'm on my way. Fletcher Fletcher flutter, what what
do you want? Help me pull this? It looks like
a robot stuck to this can opener. Robot stuck to
a camp opener. I don't now, just help me pull Okay,
I grab a hold of a limb.

Speaker 1 (41:15):
Okay, both of you roll a uh, both of you
roll strength check.

Speaker 2 (41:21):
I'm rolling for ship today.

Speaker 3 (41:23):
That's eleven nine nine ten.

Speaker 2 (41:29):
You know who could probably pull it off. A big
fucking elephant out there.

Speaker 3 (41:36):
I don't know who his name is, BackStar, what what?

Speaker 1 (41:42):
What?

Speaker 3 (41:42):
What do you want?

Speaker 2 (41:43):
Come help us pull this robots down.

Speaker 1 (41:46):
Bonder Maunder's stuck again. Hold hold on you just kind
of here, I'm coming bunder. He slams open the doors.
Wonder are you okay? Are you okay?

Speaker 3 (41:59):
Buddy?

Speaker 1 (42:00):
I need you to spook to him, immediately pulls him
like pulls the magnet uh from him, away from the
magnet and in the floor.

Speaker 3 (42:07):
You see this war war forged.

Speaker 1 (42:10):
Robot just kind of just laying there, and you see
like that, it looks like slowly he's been like ripped
apart like a like a like a slinky like it's
like the uh, the like the the can opener went
all around him and starts spiraling up towards his body

(42:33):
and you and you just uh said, oh god, he's
not doing good. I gotta I gotta, I gotta perform.
I gotta bring him back. Okay, I'm gonna use let's see,
it's gonna use uhuh don't work. He starts taking uh

(42:53):
he pulls out a hammer and a uh and a
little uh and like he pulls out a hammer and
it starts to glow with fire and he uh like
and he gets a pair of pliers out like Alic
I said.

Speaker 3 (43:07):
Don't work, We'll bring you back. And as he.

Speaker 1 (43:10):
Starts doing it, he's gonna cast mending into the the
robots slow and the war for it slowly starts grumbing
back together. Is okay? Any any of you have a
have an electricity spell or something.

Speaker 2 (43:24):
Like that atru don't?

Speaker 3 (43:27):
I definitely don't.

Speaker 1 (43:28):
Well, well damn, there's only only one thing to do.
Gork Gork and he just he like you hear footsteps
and as he opens the door, he just stands there
like you see, like you've seen like Michael Jackson, like
when he torched, like when he did the Super Bowl
when he burst through the floor.

Speaker 11 (43:49):
He just you just see like golr just standing there
stare I just like and you out of nowhere, just
shades like it looks like he has shades on, like
he just burnt verst to the door like a freaking
action hero.

Speaker 1 (44:03):
And he just walks over and just like and just
looks deep deep in the face, gets real close and
just and you just and out of nowhere. The war
force just slowly just turned starts glowing, turns up.

Speaker 2 (44:17):
And he gets.

Speaker 1 (44:24):
That too. Jes nod G what what what? What was that?

Speaker 3 (44:31):
What?

Speaker 1 (44:32):
I was? I stuck back up there in that uh
in that terrible contraption? Who who found me?

Speaker 2 (44:42):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (44:42):
Thank you, thank you, sir. I must appreciate your your
your generosity during this this time of my need. My
my name is Jered Jericho.

Speaker 3 (44:54):
Thought it was Bonder.

Speaker 1 (44:56):
Huh what wall? It's all coming back to me. I
am mounder man. The magazine really really mess with your head.

Speaker 2 (45:06):
If I believe you, you look like this robot on
the named Flexo, and he's a jerk and a liar.

Speaker 1 (45:15):
We're all a uh, we're all an investigation checks. See
like if it's not if you won Sam, he's Flexo.

Speaker 2 (45:24):
Or yeah, let's see her Flexo. I don't believe you.
Maybe if somebody watched Futurama, they I don't tell you
like that show.

Speaker 3 (45:38):
But I never said I didn't like it. I just
hadn't watched it.

Speaker 2 (45:40):
It's fantastic.

Speaker 3 (45:42):
It's Flexo.

Speaker 2 (45:44):
He's like Bender's evil twin.

Speaker 1 (45:47):
He's not even Bender's evil twin.

Speaker 2 (45:49):
He's good.

Speaker 1 (45:49):
He's a good Yeah.

Speaker 2 (45:50):
That's the thing is benders flex.

Speaker 3 (45:54):
His name was Fender Bender.

Speaker 1 (45:59):
No, you don't know, miss Flexa. You known him as Sturdo.
He's sturdy.

Speaker 2 (46:06):
Eight plus.

Speaker 1 (46:09):
Yeah, no you you you don't, but you have flashbacks
that it was Sturno.

Speaker 2 (46:15):
Sturdo killed my brother.

Speaker 1 (46:17):
What's your brother's name?

Speaker 2 (46:19):
I don't remember.

Speaker 1 (46:20):
We must be must have been such a gruesome, gruesome knight.
If you can't remember, I'm sorry for that, brother. But god,
that's that's so nicey all to dude. My name is
h I'm I'm Bonder, I'm the I'm the chef of this,
of this.

Speaker 2 (46:41):
Well Wonderson's I saved your life and all? How about
what has some uh something of the Oh? Oh gosh,
I love Neptunian slug.

Speaker 3 (46:52):
Neptunian slug.

Speaker 1 (46:53):
Oh god, I can do that heart me. As you see, uh,
he goes over and he starts uh, and you just
see everything like flashing, like like a flash of light,
like he like he he knows his way around the kitchen.

Speaker 2 (47:11):
But do you have any quagners human rhymes?

Speaker 1 (47:15):
He gott that twenty he has it all? Is it
all human rhymes? Well, I hate to say but we
we do, but we have to go to the doctor's room.
That's where he hides him. He uh no, but I
I don't really want to go much down to the
the doctors.

Speaker 2 (47:38):
Moron. Yeah, nobody doesn't like multi boron. Oh this is true.

Speaker 1 (47:42):
Malta born is pretty good. But here, let's I know
what what will get you? An a little bit of
spice and all that with this with the spice sauce
a lot quite like pull like he he lifts up
a regular size osalot. He turns around with his butt

(48:05):
like facing the food and just gives a slap on
the butt and you just see like and you just
see spray coming from the back it's back end. But
it doesn't smell like shit, but it gives a wifty
aroma of seven herbs and spices.

Speaker 3 (48:26):
I'm pretty sure I've smelled this at a chicken restaurant.

Speaker 2 (48:30):
It's pretty good though.

Speaker 1 (48:33):
As you all you all sit down like like in
the like in in the dining like in the breakroom,
and you all decide to eat, Gordon just sits there
and just stares at.

Speaker 2 (48:45):
You both which one.

Speaker 1 (48:49):
Part the parents are staring at you, judging you, and
it says.

Speaker 3 (48:55):
Yeah, I see the way.

Speaker 1 (48:58):
That you look at my master his hair very luscious,
very nice. It looks over at Gordon. Yes, do you agree, Gorn?

Speaker 3 (49:08):
I don't trust the parrots.

Speaker 1 (49:13):
And they just fly off and then walks up, comes
to the door and you just feel a gust of
wind like a breeze just slowly fill the ship. You
guys don't know where this breeze us. He doesn't know
what just happens. He sits down.

Speaker 3 (49:27):
The breeze on a spaceship that's dangerous, usually an indication
of a whole breach.

Speaker 1 (49:38):
He just sits down at the table with you all.
Are you going to bring that up to him? Why
is there a breeze? You just hear Baxter going, oh god,
dang it, another breach in this ship.

Speaker 3 (49:59):
I just mag stir up and he barges out.

Speaker 1 (50:02):
Trying to find and you just hear that the climbing
of a hammer and like your hears like I won't
let you die girl. It comes back as okay, we're
safe again.

Speaker 3 (50:14):
The fine safe. We'll make it, define making it.

Speaker 1 (50:21):
We say, given about ten minutes and we'll and we'll
be there.

Speaker 2 (50:28):
Huh ten minutes. This is a fast ship.

Speaker 1 (50:32):
I know well, I say, you guys have been on
this ship for for a few hours, like just you
guys have been to like been flying for a few hours.

Speaker 3 (50:41):
Well, it's felt like we've only been in here for
like ten minutes the time dilation. We just sat down
the yeah we got here, got the robot starting as
as the like BackStar looks. I said, for.

Speaker 1 (51:01):
Man for like a guy in a war veteran man.
You guys sure do know you're your science?

Speaker 2 (51:10):
So are you a girl pixie or a guy pixie?

Speaker 3 (51:16):
Why don't want to find out?

Speaker 1 (51:17):
Well, technically he's a pretty bad Technically they're a fairy.

Speaker 2 (51:20):
It's been a long time.

Speaker 3 (51:22):
Well you said that with a hard r.

Speaker 1 (51:23):
Yeah, Hey, hey a furry.

Speaker 2 (51:28):
It's a pixie.

Speaker 1 (51:31):
I thought I thought you're a fairy.

Speaker 3 (51:33):
Well I'm a fr But you keep saying fairy with
a hard r. How offensive?

Speaker 1 (51:39):
How am I supposed to say it?

Speaker 3 (51:41):
Fairy? Fairy? Why do you keep saying it? You keep
saying with a hard art. It's very offensive to my people.

Speaker 2 (51:50):
I think he's at a big an elephant that never
forgets anything, does he?

Speaker 1 (51:56):
Well, I don't want to go much into my past,
but there are some things. Uh as he kind of
looks out into space, like into the space space. Some
things an elephant never does, forgets, So.

Speaker 2 (52:13):
I can't tell if you're a guy or a girl.
And I don't know if that frightens me or arouses me.

Speaker 3 (52:21):
I want to kiss him. Just see how you feel later.

Speaker 2 (52:24):
Okay, I don't care what you are. It's gonna look
my quarters.

Speaker 1 (52:35):
You feel like you.

Speaker 2 (52:37):
Ten minutes.

Speaker 1 (52:42):
Okay, you all roll a you know what, roll a
performance check.

Speaker 2 (52:49):
We're performing for you, no.

Speaker 1 (52:52):
To see how well you all perform in bed.

Speaker 2 (53:04):
I got it. I got an eighteen. Okay, I'm about
to rock your world, baby.

Speaker 3 (53:16):
Eighteen.

Speaker 2 (53:18):
The best love baking either of us have had a
long time.

Speaker 1 (53:23):
You all go into the UH, you all go into
the UH, into y'all's course, and you all start going
at it. And then right when you're like you guys
start going hardcore like this is the best sex you
all ever had. And then right before you all are
close to getting off, ha ha ha.

Speaker 2 (53:47):
I don't care about that, we're finishing you here.

Speaker 1 (53:52):
Over the intercom. We're bringing a toc down. Need everybody
up here on deck. We're we're we're meeting like we're
going against the brave Captain and then I.

Speaker 2 (54:03):
Just did a couple more thrusts. Ah, all right, let's go.

Speaker 3 (54:10):
And the thing is, you still are not.

Speaker 2 (54:13):
Yeah, I'm putting my clothes on, thinking to myself, I
still don't know if it's a high girl, but I
don't really care.

Speaker 1 (54:27):
You all see, uh, you all see as you all
run to the main deck, like you see multiple ships
and one huge gigantic spaceship that is half the that
looks like to be the size of a moon like
in front of you, and you just and you just

(54:48):
see that like this main cat like this huge buff
guy sitting back in his chair with an eyepatch, very
like very swave and like with like in the like
a traditional pirate like attire, but it's it's loose, but

(55:10):
it's like it's fitting. You can still tell the man
is jacked. And he just looks at Hello, we meet again,
Captain Glork, and then you and you just he is
he just stares and he Glory just stares and he
like slowly squints his eyes as I know it's I

(55:31):
You're glorious rival, Captain Rineger.

Speaker 3 (55:38):
Why does the pirates sound like Kirk?

Speaker 1 (55:42):
I don't know who that is. I don't know who
that is. But I'll tell you why this guy's in
my asshole.

Speaker 2 (55:49):
I dealt wasn't before at the Battle of omnium Tron
so much Dad.

Speaker 3 (55:57):
Okay, Back, really, what kind of health coverage do we have,
because I really think that there's a cover sieractive visits.

Speaker 1 (56:14):
Like uh, BackStar just looks at he said, I fought.

Speaker 3 (56:18):
A psychiatrist once.

Speaker 2 (56:21):
He killed so many people, so much, Dad, If.

Speaker 1 (56:25):
I'm being honest, the good duck. He's a decent way
he does, but I wouldn't trust him when it comes
to psychology. He's not the brightest. He's good the way
he does, but he's not the bridest.

Speaker 3 (56:37):
But I guess you made it this far.

Speaker 1 (56:40):
But you but Captain renderg I said, I hear you, guys,
and I hear you. I've been hauling gears for the
robot planets.

Speaker 2 (56:49):
I feel like it's just.

Speaker 3 (56:50):
Above table for.

Speaker 2 (56:52):
You sell like a gay Southern Captain Kirk, but I'm
kind of here for it.

Speaker 3 (57:04):
I feel like that threw him off.

Speaker 1 (57:07):
No, No, because I was trying to think of besidekick.
I've lost Dragonsky. You see a lizard. You see a
lizard man standing right beside him, and he looks to
be a Gecko.

Speaker 3 (57:19):
Is a is he selling car insurance?

Speaker 1 (57:22):
He is in a suit? He isn't a suit though
it's a hello. He's like, Hello, my name is guy
Co Gecko.

Speaker 3 (57:33):
Didn't you have an Australian accent?

Speaker 1 (57:37):
Do you want? Do you want him to have his
Australian accent?

Speaker 2 (57:43):
All right, he'll ad manage it.

Speaker 1 (57:47):
Hello, my name is Gyico Gecko and it's it's such
a beauty to see you today. Ah, yes, this is
this is my new instrument. I had just quiet him
on the on the name trade. His name is Geiko Gecko.

Speaker 3 (58:06):
My ga accent is a British an Australian raised in Britain.

Speaker 1 (58:10):
Yes, he's very good at scrubbing me in places when
I needed the most.

Speaker 3 (58:17):
I feel like you should contact HR.

Speaker 1 (58:23):
I get paid very well though I get paid very
very well. He's so Captain cool Orc. It seems that
we cross pads yet again. So I'm gonna need you
to hand over all the gears to the row up

(58:45):
planets so I can slowly fund my What do you want, fairy?

Speaker 3 (58:52):
I thought, WHOA why'd you say? Though a hard.

Speaker 1 (58:55):
R I'm a pirate? You gack like I can't if
I offend you or not so offensive?

Speaker 3 (59:05):
Say it with me now, fairy fairy? Oh my god?
Why does everyone keep saying I'm hearing it now? Yeah, extremely,
I know him.

Speaker 1 (59:19):
Fairy.

Speaker 3 (59:20):
Oh my god?

Speaker 2 (59:22):
Can you stop to say the word.

Speaker 1 (59:28):
Furry?

Speaker 2 (59:30):
It's even worse.

Speaker 3 (59:31):
How am I a furry? He's called me a furry?
Am I a person?

Speaker 1 (59:36):
I don't know how to not imphicit the r. It's
it's like, what if I trying to if maybe if
I tried in another an action, maybe a fairy a fairy.

Speaker 3 (59:52):
I can't deal with you anymore. And I just float
and sat on his shoulder. He just to turn around
and just I'm setting on his shoulder facing away.

Speaker 1 (01:00:03):
Okay, you're just it's okay. It's like I'm done here.

Speaker 2 (01:00:10):
It's not that.

Speaker 1 (01:00:15):
This lord just just kind of looks with a disapproving
look at like a captain Renneger. It's like, I don't
look at me. I've done nothing wrong here. It's it's
not my fault that she can't hear like that. She

(01:00:35):
keeps thinking, I'm saying fairy.

Speaker 3 (01:00:37):
Oh my god, he's still doing it.

Speaker 2 (01:00:41):
It's just like this is a pixie. They're not a fairy.
So now I'm a pixie. I see how it is.
We have sex, and now you're calling me a pixie.
You told me you were a pixie.

Speaker 3 (01:00:56):
Do I look like I fly that way?

Speaker 2 (01:00:59):
You flew a lot of different ways, just a little
bit ago.

Speaker 1 (01:01:04):
Uh uh, I'm sorry, guys. I We're just going to
do this another day, captain like we'll uh, we will meet.
We will meet again on the field of battle. But
for now, I'm going to go talk to my linguists
and trying to figure out where I'm saying. The hard

(01:01:26):
R and fairy suspend. I'm Julie.

Speaker 2 (01:01:34):
Sorry? What what? What?

Speaker 1 (01:01:36):
What is your your name?

Speaker 3 (01:01:38):
I don't know if I want to tell you.

Speaker 1 (01:01:41):
I had to say you are quite attractive now that.

Speaker 2 (01:01:45):
I actually lay off, good, lay off look at you.

Speaker 3 (01:01:49):
Oh so I'm just a fetish to you. Then you
you call me with a hard R and now you're
hitting on me.

Speaker 1 (01:01:59):
I've been with many types of creatures.

Speaker 3 (01:02:01):
But.

Speaker 2 (01:02:03):
We can't be with this one there with me, I've
with you a delivery boy.

Speaker 1 (01:02:11):
Well, I'm a captain. I feel like I could probably
do a little better than a delivery boy.

Speaker 2 (01:02:18):
Before I left the Army, I was a field marshal
in the lux Trophy and the Empire. Ah, we've been
in battle before, have we with the kill bots?

Speaker 1 (01:02:36):
You just see him, so just add into space.

Speaker 3 (01:02:40):
It just got the killbots.

Speaker 1 (01:02:45):
I I think I'm remembering another life where I had
to throw wave after wave of my men till they
quit killing.

Speaker 2 (01:02:59):
I lost wave after wave of the killbots. So much Dad,
so much death.

Speaker 1 (01:03:09):
Okay, back now, yes, listen until we meet again, Captain
Captain Glork. And then the everything goes black and you
just see the ships slowly just made away, and then
a wormhole opens up and it just and they just

(01:03:31):
disappear in.

Speaker 3 (01:03:33):
I was wondering if that's what he said. I was like,
I do have a hearing problem. Maybe I just misheard him.

Speaker 2 (01:03:41):
Had a wormhole open up earlier? It was kind of
a hot hole, like.

Speaker 3 (01:03:49):
You mean a wormhole. You said warm. You said warm.
It just makes it's like like this speaker in space.
Because I thought I misheard you, and I wasn't gonna
say that it's wormhole, but it sounded warm found in
my country accent.

Speaker 1 (01:04:10):
I'm sorry. Now now it's a warm hole.

Speaker 12 (01:04:16):
That sphincter, a giant's esque sphincter opens up and the
fastness of space, and you just see this big ship
slowly sink in to this the first at least in
the main.

Speaker 3 (01:04:35):
This guy out on the whole of the ship right
now with like a like a brush, just like scrubbing
some blue onto the side of the ship.

Speaker 1 (01:04:44):
And you just see this little like this little hole.
Slowly as the ship goes into it, it slowly widens
up and encompassing the ship until the ship goes through
and it shuts up tight. It disappears, hurt.

Speaker 2 (01:04:57):
A little moon there at the end, a little rouse.

Speaker 1 (01:05:01):
You just hear it now, and then the vastness of space.

Speaker 3 (01:05:06):
You just hear a.

Speaker 2 (01:05:09):
I'm getting I'm getting turned on again. Let's go back
our quarters.

Speaker 1 (01:05:16):
As the uh and you look over, you look over
to the side, and you do see a planet.

Speaker 2 (01:05:22):
Well, oh, yeah, we're here on a delivery mission, aren't we.

Speaker 1 (01:05:25):
Yeah. It seems like we've we've made it, but we
barely hor hole.

Speaker 3 (01:05:29):
Now there's like a round object. I'm pretty sure that's
called the prostate.

Speaker 1 (01:05:33):
We've barely we barely made it. We it's a it's
a good thing you were. You were here, Mitchko. What
I do that you were here to distract the terrible captain.

Speaker 3 (01:05:51):
Was a horrible man, horrible, so racist, so offensive.

Speaker 1 (01:05:57):
It's a good it's a good thing that you're your
attuned this to the word was that what God is
through this this attack and saved our butts. But now
let's let's let's get let's land here and and get
a moving we need to so we can we can

(01:06:18):
we make today's artis you all like you feel the
atmosphere as you all go through the atmosphere of the
planet that uh like the ship shakes as you land
on the outskirts. You land on the outskirts.

Speaker 3 (01:06:36):
I'm floating, so it's not affecting me.

Speaker 2 (01:06:38):
Then I grab you with me, want to go back
to our quarters.

Speaker 1 (01:06:48):
After after a few seconds and everything goes back to normal,
and you slowly and you land.

Speaker 8 (01:06:55):
I just I just keeps shaking you.

Speaker 3 (01:07:00):
You just there, tiny.

Speaker 1 (01:07:06):
You land on the outskirts of this gigantic town, well
this gigantic city, and you see it and it's surrounded
by a wall. H you all, you all uh attempt
to lift the box that that's in the middle of
the of the storage it is. I need everybody to

(01:07:32):
roll a strength a strength check.

Speaker 3 (01:07:34):
Oh this nice. They're pretty but I've been rolling.

Speaker 2 (01:07:50):
I have a nineteen somehow you pick it.

Speaker 1 (01:07:54):
Up, you're you're you just start flotting, fluttering your wings
and you here, I.

Speaker 2 (01:08:04):
Mean, if you want to take it, go ahead, and.

Speaker 1 (01:08:07):
You slowly lifted up said okay, now we got it up.
He put he brings over a dolly, and he said
and said, okay, you're good to set it on. You set.
As you set it down on the dolly, you just
hear this, this big old, this creak and it's a
hover dolly. This thing is so heavy that is creaking

(01:08:30):
a hover dolly.

Speaker 3 (01:08:31):
He said, okay, really, how I lifted that? He can't
even handle it. I'm only a foot doll.

Speaker 1 (01:08:38):
It's good. Now we got it on the hoover dolly.
Let's let us let's venture forth, brothers and sister or what?
What are you? Are?

Speaker 3 (01:08:48):
You?

Speaker 1 (01:08:49):
What do you identify as?

Speaker 3 (01:08:51):
How about you kiss me and we find out later
how you feel? Rather not?

Speaker 2 (01:08:56):
I'm sorry, but you just kiss everybody?

Speaker 3 (01:08:59):
Start been used as elephant, yeah exactly. I like being
used as a cocks leave.

Speaker 2 (01:09:10):
I thought we had something serious.

Speaker 3 (01:09:13):
I may be a good, nice person, like the help
everyone out.

Speaker 1 (01:09:16):
I need you both to roll a a perception check.

Speaker 3 (01:09:22):
What are we perceiving that elephant?

Speaker 1 (01:09:25):
No, just do it, just roll perception check trust me.

Speaker 2 (01:09:37):
Five. My roles are so up and down.

Speaker 3 (01:09:43):
Twelve.

Speaker 1 (01:09:45):
You both don't see it, but it's so big.

Speaker 3 (01:09:49):
It's not we don't know.

Speaker 2 (01:09:51):
I can see it.

Speaker 1 (01:09:51):
No, you don't know, not the elephant. Nick, No, you
you look. Let's saying what you all would have seen
on the back on the ship, on the like, on
the the ramp out from the corner. You can see
washbucket slowly looking over it, and you and you and
you would have heard nobody hits on my man.

Speaker 2 (01:10:17):
He's hitting on her. Yeah, you are hitting on him.
That's right.

Speaker 3 (01:10:23):
Yeah, isn't everybody always hitting on somebody? That's what.

Speaker 2 (01:10:32):
You know, Michiko, if you, if you, if you convinced
that elephant to.

Speaker 1 (01:10:39):
Watch, I can hear both of you, and I don't
consent the list. I don't know about you all, but
I'm gonna. I wanna finish this delivery and get out
of here because I remember what the War for truemots
have done before. We need to be on our best

(01:11:00):
behavior because they don't really care for us, for us
living folk. So before we go, we need to come
up with a good disguise.

Speaker 2 (01:11:13):
So I don't have a disguise, kid.

Speaker 1 (01:11:20):
But luckily we you're giving one. You are given a
disguise kids from the ship.

Speaker 3 (01:11:27):
So I need.

Speaker 1 (01:11:30):
All of us need to roll performance, roll a deception check.
I'm going, oh god, this is gonna be terrible.

Speaker 3 (01:11:44):
To disguise myself.

Speaker 1 (01:11:48):
M hm.

Speaker 3 (01:11:50):
As a giraffe, ro.

Speaker 1 (01:11:56):
About giraffe, or just a straight up giraffe.

Speaker 3 (01:11:59):
I'm just will float at the head and should hang
down like a like a stretched out mimic you.

Speaker 1 (01:12:06):
Okay, I'll thank fucking god what I got a natural
twenty on.

Speaker 2 (01:12:14):
Next, I say, I'm gonna just I went in too.

Speaker 3 (01:12:18):
I got negative too.

Speaker 1 (01:12:19):
When it comes to my deception, I'm going to add.

Speaker 13 (01:12:28):
On performance no deception. Uh, where the hell's deception there?
It is same number dirty twenty.

Speaker 2 (01:12:41):
I'm gonna disguise myself as this robot that I once
saw called the Christinator.

Speaker 1 (01:12:45):
Christinator, Yeah eighteen. All the disguise has worked well and
the same. So you where everybody is dressed up in
a mechanical outfits and start proceeding towards the towards the city.

(01:13:08):
As you all get closer, you see that the city
is surrounded by a giant wall, and in the opening
you see two gigantic robot figures. As you get close,
they just look at your said, stop, who goes there?

Speaker 2 (01:13:29):
We're robots here for delivery.

Speaker 3 (01:13:32):
Ah, what are you all here for?

Speaker 1 (01:13:34):
What are you delivering? I believe, I believe we are
here to deliver gears.

Speaker 3 (01:13:45):
For the ah.

Speaker 1 (01:13:48):
Yes, the overlords of our planet. Good. But something doesn't
seem right for you all? Yeah, there was I think
we must administer.

Speaker 3 (01:13:59):
The two A.

Speaker 1 (01:14:00):
Yes, the test? What test we must test to see
if you're all robots?

Speaker 3 (01:14:09):
We are robots ze one zero one one zero?

Speaker 6 (01:14:14):
Ah, yes, but that's not good enough. We must ask
you the test. Ugh, oh okay, what is the test?

Speaker 1 (01:14:26):
And the and the robots and the both of the
robots like their chests start open up and you see
these giant jumbo tron TVs and on the uh on
the on on their screens you see one has a
picture of a puppy playing through the fields and on

(01:14:46):
the other one you see a floppy disc.

Speaker 3 (01:14:52):
So which one of these do you prefer?

Speaker 2 (01:14:55):
I know the answer to this, the puppy.

Speaker 3 (01:15:02):
Wrong, were tanking each of one of us? Yeah, Well,
the puppy is awfully cute.

Speaker 1 (01:15:14):
I mean, just look at it.

Speaker 3 (01:15:16):
It is cute. At least it's not human, but it
is cute.

Speaker 1 (01:15:19):
Indeed, there is no time it is cute, but it's
still living.

Speaker 3 (01:15:25):
So juice, why I choose the puppy? Er you, sir?

Speaker 1 (01:15:36):
I'm gonna is the is the puppy uh mechanical in anyway?

Speaker 3 (01:15:45):
No, it is the.

Speaker 1 (01:15:48):
I'm actually her mother all man on this one. He
me on, he me a water stupid bow ties not
hell open.

Speaker 2 (01:16:01):
It is the law.

Speaker 1 (01:16:03):
Yeah, this damn bow tie and hurting helping either, but.

Speaker 3 (01:16:10):
At least there ain't fi rice today.

Speaker 2 (01:16:12):
Yeah, you've been hit thirty eight times already, just by jazz.

Speaker 1 (01:16:16):
Yeah. No, it is living well. And I'm gonna go
with the with the floppy disk.

Speaker 2 (01:16:27):
God.

Speaker 1 (01:16:29):
You other two, you aren't doing well at all to
the second test.

Speaker 3 (01:16:38):
You see.

Speaker 1 (01:16:39):
Yeah, he just looks at you, said which sounds better?
A nice relaxing stroll through the woods. And then the
other one said, oh, a refreshing and refreshing refill on
motor oil.

Speaker 3 (01:16:57):
Mm so mm hmm. We lost the first one.

Speaker 14 (01:17:01):
Yeah, it was a supert it was very so maybe
this time I know they drink absolutely bot, so maybe
we should pick.

Speaker 2 (01:17:13):
Yeah, we'll go with the motor oil one.

Speaker 1 (01:17:18):
And you Yeah, I'm going to go with the motor
oil on this one. Ah, yes, correct. Now the final test.

Speaker 3 (01:17:31):
I didn't give my response, just skate right over me, asked.

Speaker 10 (01:17:35):
Him, yes, him, guys, what.

Speaker 1 (01:17:42):
Is that there? Alarm? Anyway? What is that for?

Speaker 3 (01:17:46):
Territory defense?

Speaker 1 (01:17:48):
Okay for your star trek? Or okay, is under attack?

Speaker 3 (01:17:54):
Gone door? Calls for aid?

Speaker 2 (01:17:57):
And then Ron just meant that looking go.

Speaker 1 (01:18:02):
Then there's the final question, should you kill all humanoids? Uh?
And it just looks at and they just both look
at all three of it. Yeah, should you kill all humanoids?

Speaker 3 (01:18:27):
Well? Or is there an order to this question?

Speaker 2 (01:18:30):
No?

Speaker 3 (01:18:32):
You you cut it off like there is an or
should you kill all humanoids? Or so technically you're a
humanoid robot? So mean would that put most of the
robots into that category? Because they are humanoid robots? They
are humanoid shape? Are we referring to just strictly organic HumanID?

(01:18:54):
What about non humanoid organics?

Speaker 2 (01:18:57):
Do we like them?

Speaker 3 (01:18:58):
We kill them.

Speaker 1 (01:19:00):
Where you just see you just look at them and
they start zipping and buzzing and you just start seeing
sparks flying does not compute. Paradox does not compute, and
they just all both of them just explode right then
and there.

Speaker 2 (01:19:17):
That weird.

Speaker 3 (01:19:19):
Let's grab the box and go try to be helpful.

Speaker 1 (01:19:31):
As you entered the town, you see that everything is
completely bare. There is nobody around. It just seems like
like nobody is like like everything's just been deserted. It
looks like a ghost town. The wind rides, but you
can just hear the feints of just whirling throughout the city.

(01:19:54):
And you look at the time, as the time itself
is about to hit the next hour, you just hear a.

Speaker 10 (01:20:07):
Boom boom, as the gong, as the the bell rings emmelily, you.

Speaker 1 (01:20:18):
Just see a an army. Uh no, not an army.
What's bigger than the army?

Speaker 2 (01:20:28):
Allegion?

Speaker 1 (01:20:29):
A legion, a legion of robots immediately start flying through
the buildings and take in taking uh and just werving
through each other, avoiding hitting each other. I need everyone
to roll a Roman athletics to see if you all

(01:20:53):
are take taken by the swerve of the.

Speaker 2 (01:20:59):
M eight.

Speaker 3 (01:21:06):
Fifteen.

Speaker 1 (01:21:12):
You both are all right, yeah, okay, you all here, hey,
you all like are able to dodge and weed, but
you hear, Oh.

Speaker 2 (01:21:24):
No, they got me.

Speaker 1 (01:21:25):
I need you all to hurry up and get through
this mission. I'll meet your back on board the ship.
Remember remember me as I was not by what I am?

Speaker 2 (01:21:34):
Who was that guy?

Speaker 3 (01:21:37):
What guy?

Speaker 2 (01:21:37):
As you see, I don't remember.

Speaker 1 (01:21:39):
As you see, BackStar gets swept away off you go,
apparently by the by the human weight, by the wave
of robots. Within a few seconds after that, he like you, Uh,

(01:22:00):
everything's back back back to like a ghost town.

Speaker 2 (01:22:06):
I don't know about you, but I got to be
really bad to go take the whiz.

Speaker 1 (01:22:13):
So roll a uh, rolling a rolling.

Speaker 15 (01:22:19):
Let's see, roll a. I needs to roll a stealth
check and a and an investigation check.

Speaker 2 (01:22:32):
Investigation. See if you can find a place, so we'd
investigation first.

Speaker 1 (01:22:40):
Roll a, Uh yeah, go an investigation.

Speaker 2 (01:22:43):
Check thirteen an investigation, I find a spot to piss in.

Speaker 1 (01:22:51):
You look as you look around, you do uh. You
don't see any signs or recognized or anything. But over
towards the towards the side of a building, you do
see a trash can.

Speaker 2 (01:23:04):
I'm gonna go over by the trash.

Speaker 1 (01:23:05):
Can you go there? Roll a roll spilt check sixteen
you pee, you let it come out?

Speaker 3 (01:23:21):
Like and.

Speaker 1 (01:23:25):
It is. It comes out smooth like, it doesn't make
a sound.

Speaker 3 (01:23:32):
So he's got a lemon or flow.

Speaker 2 (01:23:38):
And now you're into that.

Speaker 1 (01:23:39):
Baby, I've down what what what are what are you
doing while this is happening? Yeah, I'm very lost where
you are. You could look at the note and see
where you're at, try to find where you need to
deliver this or.

Speaker 3 (01:23:59):
Sure, let's do that. I'll just put it. Run over
here to this box while he's beeing, and take a
look at this note. Look, I feel like we should
have read when we got off the ship.

Speaker 1 (01:24:12):
Let's saying you. You look on the on the you
look on the address of the box, and it says.

Speaker 3 (01:24:22):
Leave a gate.

Speaker 1 (01:24:26):
It does say leave the gate at leave a gate
at High Square Avenue, Subsidiary Avenue. But you look around

(01:24:49):
and you douce and you don't see anything but roll
a butt sam, roll a perception check.

Speaker 2 (01:24:59):
How LOLd am I for?

Speaker 1 (01:25:02):
Whenever? How long you want?

Speaker 2 (01:25:07):
Okay?

Speaker 1 (01:25:07):
I think? Okay? Could you you walk back over twenty four?
Have you got twenty.

Speaker 3 (01:25:15):
You see you look over to see.

Speaker 2 (01:25:17):
All you'll space and time all at once.

Speaker 1 (01:25:22):
You you look over and you see.

Speaker 2 (01:25:28):
What does he know?

Speaker 1 (01:25:29):
You see a map, and lo and behold there is
a little sign that says you are here. And you
look too, and you see like where and you look
on the map and you see where you need to go,
and it is about three blocks up, three blocks to

(01:25:50):
the north. Uh, four blocks west, one block south.

Speaker 2 (01:26:01):
It's near a wall of trees.

Speaker 1 (01:26:05):
Into wall of trees avenue. You are currently on the
wall on the you're on tree Avenue.

Speaker 3 (01:26:14):
Well with a planet full of robots and all living things,
Ama Street, Tree Avenue after a living thing.

Speaker 2 (01:26:22):
They're mechanical trees on the mechanical trees.

Speaker 1 (01:26:26):
Why they do you see a wall of mechanical trees
along like the middle of the of the roads. They're
kind of like the dividers. They're trying to do urban.

Speaker 3 (01:26:41):
Beautification.

Speaker 1 (01:26:42):
Yeah, urban robotic robo purification.

Speaker 3 (01:26:46):
Beautification purification. Yeah, I know what I said. Yeah, we
do too, and we have it over recorded.

Speaker 1 (01:27:01):
Yeah, robo purification.

Speaker 3 (01:27:05):
I didn't know these robots, well, I guess we did
know they were genocidal, but it.

Speaker 1 (01:27:13):
Is a robot player with no with no living humanoids.

Speaker 3 (01:27:17):
Some racist robots, sir, only the master race of robots
black and deck.

Speaker 1 (01:27:25):
You see huh, you do see on the package it's
like delivered to that to the Council of Robots, And
you do see a you do see a little a
little collection of robots coming down the street and they said, oh, hello,

(01:27:48):
fellow robots, have you have you heard the news? There's
going to be an execution today.

Speaker 2 (01:27:55):
Who are they executing?

Speaker 1 (01:27:57):
Apparently they found a living humanoid within the last hour.

Speaker 3 (01:28:03):
Death to humanoids, Yeah, death to humanoids, humanoids? What is
this humanoids designation?

Speaker 1 (01:28:14):
Well, he like he was found during the main rush
in a in a suit of metal. So that's saying
nobody ain't really talking much, but we are under the
assumption that there are more human living humans or humanoids
on the planet at the moment. So everybody's getting together

(01:28:36):
and we're doing our monthly human hunt humanoid hunt.

Speaker 3 (01:28:42):
Oh so exciting. But do you need any volunteers to
card this humanoid?

Speaker 1 (01:28:52):
That's something you may need to go talk to the
Council of war Forge, who controls the place. I'm pretty
sure they would be happy to have the help.

Speaker 3 (01:29:04):
I think we should go because I think they captured
Viewford whatever his name was, I don't know his name.

Speaker 2 (01:29:11):
Oh the big elephant guy. Sure, I guess let's go
save him.

Speaker 1 (01:29:16):
You just hear you just hear his BackStar enough.

Speaker 3 (01:29:21):
It's close.

Speaker 1 (01:29:23):
You just you're just hearing like hearing the wind BackStar
and you and you look look over and you see
little wash buckets slowly heading like making her way through
the streets.

Speaker 2 (01:29:37):
What was his name again, Burton?

Speaker 1 (01:29:39):
And you just hear her sid I'm camming for you BackStar.

Speaker 3 (01:29:51):
As a colave daddy like.

Speaker 1 (01:29:54):
But the robots just look at you as Yeah, So
all you need to do is head uh blocks that way,
take up, take a right, take four blocks, uh that way.
It's like, well that's saying you know what it said
that it's just be easier for me to to insert

(01:30:15):
insert this into you, so and you can tell a
load the info. And he pulls out a little USB.

Speaker 3 (01:30:22):
I said.

Speaker 1 (01:30:23):
All you gotta do is just said, Dory. Just open
up your your drive and will and uh I will
insert it.

Speaker 2 (01:30:33):
Hey there with me, stop talking dirty to them.

Speaker 1 (01:30:37):
But I'm just trying to is is the uh is
the uh? Is the port on this one malfunctioning at
the moment?

Speaker 2 (01:30:47):
Do you just fun but it only functions for me?

Speaker 1 (01:30:51):
Well, then we need to plug this into you.

Speaker 2 (01:30:57):
I guess the uh.

Speaker 1 (01:31:00):
Been over that said, oh good man, man, we got
to really open your whole up to gentle he I
need you to throw, to throw a strength check.

Speaker 3 (01:31:21):
Shouldn't be a constitution check.

Speaker 1 (01:31:24):
We're all you know what, We're all a constitution saving
throw for your butthole. You you like he take it,
You take it like a champ like he slowly, he
just he just pluck like sticks the sticks the thumb

(01:31:45):
drive into your butt and just gives a second.

Speaker 2 (01:31:48):
It's more joyful than I thought it would be.

Speaker 1 (01:31:52):
What what are you Are you gonna say anything like
say anything like, well, this is going to make it
realistic that you are a robot?

Speaker 2 (01:32:01):
No, I think I'm gonna moan, little.

Speaker 1 (01:32:06):
Little he just looks like you said, what kind of moon?
What kind of robot? Moans when being injected with an
information stick?

Speaker 2 (01:32:16):
I really love information roll.

Speaker 1 (01:32:19):
A deception check.

Speaker 3 (01:32:23):
Why don't you be in that one?

Speaker 2 (01:32:29):
I have a nag and minus one on deception nineteen eighteens.

Speaker 3 (01:32:37):
It works.

Speaker 1 (01:32:39):
It just he just he gives as he's staring at
giving you the squinty ass. He said, oh okay, pulls
it out and just like okay, you're good to go.
And the and the little pack of robots with pitchfork
and torches. Just go away? What do y'all do?

Speaker 3 (01:32:58):
So, Michiko, you're not very big.

Speaker 2 (01:33:06):
I like that a lot more than I thought it
would care to go to.

Speaker 3 (01:33:18):
Maybe after we get off the death planet, I may
go spelunking. Okay, it been a while, it's.

Speaker 1 (01:33:27):
Been a while since you've gone dungeon delving.

Speaker 16 (01:33:30):
Yes, m hm, so what do you all? What are
y'all doing? We're gonna go deliver the box. I want
to go back to the ship.

Speaker 3 (01:33:42):
What about the other guy?

Speaker 2 (01:33:45):
Oh yeah, Baba Bernard whatever his name is, Barrabas. Let's
go get Barnaby.

Speaker 3 (01:33:54):
Well, because they didn't say we have to see the
council for approval.

Speaker 1 (01:33:58):
Or he said, yeah, but they are the ones who
control the the we have.

Speaker 2 (01:34:04):
To deliver the box to them anyway. So let's deliver
and then we'll ask if we can guard Barnabas.

Speaker 1 (01:34:13):
So okay, So you will make your way through the city,
following the directions into and you find this this what
can only be described as let's just say it's the
White House, a white house esque building, you.

Speaker 2 (01:34:34):
Know, for hating humanoids. They do a lot of humanoid
like stuff based on humanoid things. I think these robots
are hypocrites.

Speaker 3 (01:34:43):
That's why I point out that they want to call humanoids,
but they're humanoid robots.

Speaker 1 (01:34:50):
You all make it the end. You go walk, you
go up to the uh to the main doors of
this of this house like of this real like robotic
version of the White House, and you all knock. Nothing happens.
What do you what are you gonna do?

Speaker 3 (01:35:10):
Knock again, Nothing happens. I knock again.

Speaker 2 (01:35:18):
I wanted to investigation checks you I can find like
a doorbell or something. Yeah, go ahead, I knock harder.
But you've got six little hands.

Speaker 1 (01:35:28):
You're doing Do do straight checks? Do do a do
performance check? Sam?

Speaker 2 (01:35:40):
I got an eight an investigation.

Speaker 3 (01:35:44):
Seventeen.

Speaker 1 (01:35:48):
With all your tiny strength, you smack that door and
you hear a boom and the door opens.

Speaker 7 (01:35:59):
Ah ha ha, and you see a figure like when
you see like two gigantic robotic eyes.

Speaker 1 (01:36:14):
Hello, ah, how may I help you? I'm easy the
butler of this mansion.

Speaker 3 (01:36:25):
Because you have I felt icy because you have big eyes.

Speaker 1 (01:36:29):
Yes, so how can I help you?

Speaker 2 (01:36:35):
To say the robot council, We've got a question and
we have a delivery.

Speaker 1 (01:36:41):
Oh, yes, a delivery yes, I will happily take that.
And so he takes the package away.

Speaker 2 (01:36:48):
You have to sign for it, sir ah, yes.

Speaker 3 (01:36:51):
Yes, yes, he he literally sees some id first though,
any idea that you work here certified delivery?

Speaker 1 (01:36:58):
Oh fan see they really go out on the council
and he opens up his chest chest place and you
see his uh, I guess, like a little notification card
of like what his unit number is, his name, and
like some other credentials and stuff like that. And he
opens up a he lifts his finger up and a

(01:37:19):
little pens like kind of a pin comes out of it.

Speaker 3 (01:37:22):
Oh do these work for you? Yeah, we'll accept it.

Speaker 1 (01:37:28):
Yeah, yes, yes, wonderful. Yes. He jots down a jots
down the information like you're all's signs his name, and
takes the boxing it's puts it down beside the door.
He goes, yes, now this way, and he just and
as you all follow, you look through the house and

(01:37:51):
and you wouldn't expect it to be you wouldn't expect
this place to be empty. Think it's just robots, simple stuff.
But no, you see robotic versions of just famous art pieces.
You see uh, the Rebo Lisa, you see the you
see this the screech you see, uh, whatever, the the whatever.

(01:38:18):
The poster for the matrix is the poster for the
like the actual movie poster for the matrix you see
on the wall. They consider this art and he leads
you down a hallway into a dark room. Sam, we're
you about to fall asleep on us again?

Speaker 3 (01:38:40):
A long day?

Speaker 2 (01:38:42):
Do we need to end the session? Season is getting tired?

Speaker 1 (01:38:51):
Yeah, okay, so you'll make it to the dark So
y'all make it to the dark room and you uh
a out of nowhere? You see five h You're standing
in the middle of the circle and I'll know where
five figures show up around you? So who goes there?
Why are you here?

Speaker 3 (01:39:08):
Hello?

Speaker 2 (01:39:10):
We have a delivery? Ah?

Speaker 1 (01:39:12):
Yes, yes, are you also here too? For the humanoid hunt.
We are the We are the Council of War fourg
here we take Oh, we are the leaders of this place. Said,
what is it is? The gears that we uh we here.

Speaker 2 (01:39:30):
Have that we ordered.

Speaker 3 (01:39:33):
These are good good.

Speaker 1 (01:39:35):
Now we can slowly build back our army to to
take over our enemies. But I need you no, but
his robots they are hungry and when they need these,
they feed on these gears. But you have saved them.
You will become heroes. We we will grant you anything
for saving our people, having.

Speaker 3 (01:39:59):
On more of the the limit here because they're rebuilding
their armies and I don't want to help them because
that's the wrong thing to do. But also my job
is to deliver, and the right thing to do is
to do my job.

Speaker 17 (01:40:11):
Decisions decisions, you all, dude, you all look over to
the side and you just see BackStar just standing in.

Speaker 1 (01:40:24):
The cage, like just in a cage. Will you idiots
get me out of this thing.

Speaker 2 (01:40:31):
I don't let the guy out of here.

Speaker 3 (01:40:34):
I've never seen this organic life form before in my life. Oh, marmalade,
can we.

Speaker 2 (01:40:44):
Guard him until the execution? I've always wanted to do
guard duty in official capacity.

Speaker 1 (01:40:49):
Oh yes, yes, anything for our heroes. We are say,
we shall leave the room so you all can do
your job. So you and you can do this. We're
gonna go investigate the box. And they all just kind
of and they all just kind of move out the
out of the room, and you are now stuck alone

(01:41:10):
with BackStar.

Speaker 2 (01:41:12):
Okay, it's about tell y'all, y'all.

Speaker 18 (01:41:17):
Buddy, stand back I wanna I want to cast divine
smite on on the sail or that he's in okay,
and then I want to cast fine steed and seven, uh,
he's asleep.

Speaker 1 (01:41:36):
We're almost done.

Speaker 2 (01:41:37):
Seven a robotic horse that we all three hop on
and gallop out back to the ship.

Speaker 1 (01:41:46):
So as the well as the uh as you performed
to my divine smite on the on the cage. Everything
goes wide and you just hear oh arm laid and
you just see the BackStar smoking because it hit him.

Speaker 2 (01:42:07):
Oh dard, we gave it our best. Yeah, jump on
this mechanical steed.

Speaker 19 (01:42:13):
That I got.

Speaker 1 (01:42:14):
Let's go back to the ship as you all escape,
escape on the thing.

Speaker 3 (01:42:19):
We kill him or is he just.

Speaker 1 (01:42:22):
He singed, Well, we tried our best. Let's go hop
on the horse and you all just start going back
like and just start hoofing it like back through the
sea out of nowhere. Our alarm goes starts going, and

(01:42:44):
all the robots start forming out and start chasing after
your No, don't leave, heroes, No we we we must.
You must help us and be there for the executioner.
We shall sacrifice him in your honor to destroy all
humans to rebuild the army. Yeah, have fun with that

(01:43:07):
and you all, you all burnt, burst out of the
out of the out of the city. And and as
you all like make it to the ship. You all
make it to the ship. What happens? What do you
all do?

Speaker 2 (01:43:23):
We run up to the and hit emergency takeoff.

Speaker 1 (01:43:29):
Glork just looks at just Glork just looks at you
all just given like a concerned look as to say,
where's BackStar?

Speaker 2 (01:43:39):
He hes here? Oh yeah, barbs, he's in the cargo hold.

Speaker 1 (01:43:45):
Oh, okay, okay. As the ship takes off. Eh, as
the ship takes off, you see that, yeah, out of nowhere,
you feel the uh, you feel a The ship immediately
stops and you had to start shaking. You all run

(01:44:08):
to the side and you see that the robots have
made a tower and are now holding the ship.

Speaker 3 (01:44:14):
What do you do?

Speaker 1 (01:44:17):
But they seem conveniently holding on to where uh over
to the cargo deck.

Speaker 2 (01:44:29):
I don't know what you want to do.

Speaker 1 (01:44:33):
Well, I've seen this before.

Speaker 2 (01:44:35):
You have any spells that might come in handy that might.

Speaker 3 (01:44:38):
Be better what I was thinking, I was thinking blowing
the car.

Speaker 1 (01:44:43):
Do you all go down there? You'll go to the
cargo deck.

Speaker 19 (01:44:47):
I say, we blow the cargo door and the I've
got an even better solution. Let's uh, let's inject the
warp cords. We could both the entire planet. And they're

(01:45:08):
not alive. They are sentient robots, so what.

Speaker 3 (01:45:15):
I know they want to kill all of us, but
killing is wrong.

Speaker 2 (01:45:20):
But we're not killing them were amlily.

Speaker 1 (01:45:22):
You hear footsteps coming coming up up through the ship
and the door opens and you see BackStar.

Speaker 2 (01:45:29):
Oh God, I told you Bernard was here.

Speaker 1 (01:45:34):
God good thing wash buckets save me? Oh god that uh?
I found this box and you see a little box
like in hand, and I think we we screwed up
the delivery. I think we're supposed to get this.

Speaker 2 (01:45:53):
I stiff think we should ejected the World Corps.

Speaker 3 (01:45:56):
What's in the box?

Speaker 1 (01:45:59):
You u gor uh? BackStar just walks over to the
like down to the bottom of the ship. It's like here,
I think this is your als. Hands in the box
and the ship takes off.

Speaker 3 (01:46:14):
I wanted to know what was in the box, and
he just throws it out.

Speaker 1 (01:46:17):
You see the tower robots start to sway and fall,
and right when the box hits the uh the box
hits the ground. An explosion happens, and you see, like

(01:46:38):
in a mushroom cloud slowly starts to rise up. And
as the mushroom cloud rises out of nowhere, you start
seeing things coming out the top, and you see gears
burst at the top of it and start filling the planet.
And you hear the phrases thank you humans, you praise

(01:47:01):
the humans years and you all fade into oblivion as
you all like go out in space with a delivery done.

Speaker 2 (01:47:12):
Well, that was a crazy first day at work. Since
you're back in the ship, you want to get spilinking.

Speaker 3 (01:47:20):
Sure, but first make sure you do someone run into
those stalactites in there, okay.

Speaker 1 (01:47:29):
And then as the as this you all go to
your room, you just hear like, just out of nowhere
space and not so final frontier. These are the captain.

(01:47:50):
I don't think this is the time, Like, let's let's
just go home, and Glork just let us go silent
again and nods his head. As you all drift into space.

Speaker 3 (01:48:05):
I will say, a foot long faery going up your
bikes will be a lot bigger than a thumb drive.

Speaker 2 (01:48:14):
We'll just a little up, okay.

Speaker 1 (01:48:18):
And we're in the session rot there.

Speaker 3 (01:48:23):
That's what.

Speaker 1 (01:48:25):
As Sam's ready to pass out.

Speaker 2 (01:48:29):
On Papa a week been a long day.

Speaker 1 (01:48:38):
Well, this is what what what should we call this adventure?
The Far from Home? A uh oh cap? What do
we call? What do we call this company? Again?

Speaker 2 (01:48:54):
It depends depends on what tax are trying to.

Speaker 1 (01:48:59):
We'll go back and listen to it. I'll name it
name this episode later. But we want to thank everybody
for joining us for this short one shot in a
maybe future campaign once we get everything up and running.
But I'd say we do have a Patreon going up,
so anybody who would like to donate, we do appreciate it. It

(01:49:22):
will go into giving better quality of the regular craft
that we do and supply us with better equipment. Until then,
everybody have a week and we will see you next week.

Speaker 2 (01:49:37):
For hopefully the conclusion of Trailer Parker.

Speaker 1 (01:49:40):
Trailer Park Magnus. If I don't put more voodoo magic.

Speaker 2 (01:49:43):
On Jeff, so lay off the voodoo.

Speaker 1 (01:49:46):
We will talk to everybody next week