April 20, 2024 • 42 mins
We are back!! In this episode, we meet Leonardo -- an actor, a craftsman, a creator. Leonardo and I discuss the many intracacies of the entertainment industry. Leonardo shares what it's like to audition, how to not chase the industry, and the impact a role can have on an actor. We delve into the beauty of acting: the process. Leonardo loves to create; he shares the many ways he experiences a character emotionally, and how that fuels his love for acting. He also shares some of his favorite films and why he loves them.
Listen in and let's be curious together..
Listen in and let's be curious together..
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Hey, thanks for joining us andtuning in to my podcast, Curious and
Uncomfortable. I'm Niri. You arecreator, producer, and host. This
podcast is an exploratory conversation where twopeople come together and talk about being uncomfortable.
I have guests come on from allover the country, from various walks
(00:20):
of life and unique professions, andtogether we question all things uncomfortable through many
lenses society, lifestyle, politics,culture, and more. In doing this,
our conversations are real, perceptive andnatural. They aren't scripted, and
most of the time they aren't evenreally planned. We're just two curious people
(00:43):
eager to answer some questions. Soopen your mind, listen, and learn.
Let's be curious together. Hello everyone, Welcome back to Curious and Uncomfortable.
(01:17):
If you're new here, welcome.This is episode ten and our guest
today is Leonardo. Leonardo is anactor who currently lives in la He has
been working almost his whole life sincehe was a teenager, but really he's
been doing feeder and plays and performingfor his family and friends since he was
(01:38):
a kid. We talk about somany different things today. We talk about
playing a character and what that's like. We talk about what it's like to
be an audition room and what theauditioning process is like. We talk about
how to be authentically yourself in thisindustry, and how to let the industry
chase you and you not chase it, and in the beauty of building your
(02:00):
craft as an actor and enjoying theprocess as much as the result. At
the end of the episode, wedo have a little segment where Leonardo shared
some of his favorite films and maybesome facts about them that you didn't know.
So without further Ado, let's getcurious with Leonardo's a picture for me
(02:32):
of your first experience in an audition. Yeah, okay, yeah, my
first experience. I mean, I'mtrying to remember the first experience. There
was that stick out. You mean, you have to get these sides right,
and you learn your lines as bestas possible, and you go in
(02:53):
there and you try to give ityour best shot. Right. So there's
a couple of different things that stickin my mind. One and these are
all different experiences of all different auditionsand all compiling because they kind of all
just come together. One, yougo to the room and there are like
twenty people that look exactly like you, you know, and so you're like,
(03:16):
oh cool, all right. Thenthere's you know, the nerves that
kick in. You know, youreally want to get this thing, so
whatever it may be, and soyou're really working on just managing your anxiety
and stress levels and just staying focusedin the character. And as a young
(03:37):
actor, the audition anxiety definitely wouldget the best of me sometimes and you
would go into the scene, meetthe cast and director, into the room
once they call your name, andyou know, those nerves are going through
your stomach, right and you justhave your sides and try to do your
(03:58):
best and take what every direction theycan give you. I know that sometimes
you drop a line and then itjust all starts crumbling down, you know,
and then you're just like, oh, trying to find the find where
you were at, where you're atlooking at the pages and yeah, you
know it was There's been a coupleof those where you drop it and you
(04:20):
just make a fool of yourself andyou're just like, oh, man,
what did I do? And yeah, I mean there's I can definitely say
there was definitely a lot of thosestarting off, because it's all a learning
process and you know, never beingin a room, there's certain things that
(04:43):
get the best of you, andthen from there you just learn and grow.
Do you remember how old you werewhen you had your first audition?
I guess professional and audition, Iwould say like around fifteen, teen fifteen.
It's interesting, you know, likewhen I was fourteen and fifteen,
(05:03):
it just felt like, oh you, you were so naive or I was
so naive in a way that itwas just more of like fun and play.
Then you start learning all these techniquesand start training, and sometimes those
things get in the way. Youknow, It's like you get worse before
you get better. And I rememberthere was a Vampire Diaries audition that I
(05:24):
did long, long time ago,and you know, I had I had
all this like built up, likeoh I got this, I got this.
I got this because I was,you know, training and booking,
and and I guess there was somethingdifferent, like you know, you prepare
for it, and you prepare forit, and you prepare for it,
(05:44):
you run the scene in your head, and I think I was like,
I don't know, eighteen nineteen,I did and I dropped the line and
I was so confident that I forgotmy sides out in the waiting room.
So I'm sitting there with no sidesin hand, and I'm completely blanked,
(06:05):
like what do I do now?How do I get out of this?
And you find you know, Ifound my way. I mean, I
mean the casting director was like,let's do a redirect, Let's try that
again. But you know, atthat point I already lost it. It
was it was one of those thingswhere you know, my confidence got the
(06:29):
best of me, and then itwas like a reality check of like,
yo, you make sure that youhave everything that you need, Like you
always want to have your sides onyou, especially in the audition room,
because there's variables that you just youcan never imagine that will happen. You
know, the nerve, your nerveswill get the best of you. Your
brain will just blank, Like Icouldn't believe my brain blank. I knew
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those lines forwards and backwards, andmy brain just blinked. And I didn't
have my sides on me, andI looked very green and I get and
I did not get that role.Yeah. Wow, that's so interesting.
Wow. So it's interesting that wethat building up all this confidence does the
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opposite of what we think it'll do. I mean, we think it's gonna
well, not all the time,I guess, but I mean for me,
like taking a test, I buildup all this confidence to take it.
I'm like, oh, I gotthis, Like I don't even need
another review. I'm good and Igo in and then I'm like, oh,
I don't remember any of the formulas, none of the principles. Like
you asked me what this is andI couldn't tell you. But you asked
(07:35):
me ten minutes ago outside the testingroom, and I got you. But
it's just I don't know. It'sjust when it happens, it feels like
it's out of your control. Sure, sure, I mean you know now.
I enjoy the audition room now.I mean it's a place where you
can create and have the first chancebefore anyone else tags on their thoughts to
(07:56):
the character, so you can bringyour character. I have the chances to
be me and fully be Nowadays,I mean the audition room is kind of
not a thing anymore because everything haskind of gone self tapes. I can
explain that in a minute. Iwill say this one thing, though,
I think there's a difference between confidenceand cockiness, and I think when we
(08:18):
forget, when that line gets crossedover, it's a fine line. It's
a very fine line, and whenwe cross that line over, I think
cockiness got the best of me inthat audition room years ago because confidence,
knowing that having that confidence gives youthe strength and the freedom to play.
(08:41):
Confidence is the thing that we definitelyneed in those rooms. And you can
sense it too, like when I'vebeen on both sides of the audition room,
casting and acting, and you cantell the difference between like a confident
actor, a cocky actor, anda desperate actor. You know there's a
(09:05):
difference between all those three and nervous. You know, we know there's nerves
and so you try to manage itas best as you can. And nowadays,
like I was saying, it's moreself takes or zoom auditions. We
rarely now go into office rarely rarely, I mean commercials. Think that affects
(09:26):
the experience, Yes, I meanyou're not getting the notes of the feedback
immediately anymore. Whereas before you hada casting director, you would be walking
into the room, the casting directorwould know you would be personal moment,
they see who you are outside ofthe character, instead of just seeing whatever
(09:46):
character you might be playing, likeyou might be playing a football player.
One day and a serial killer ofthe next you know, so they're just
going off of your auditions rather thanwho you are. So there is that
element. There's a second element thatyou're missing out on is direct feedback,
where you can get a redirect froma casting director because they know exactly what
(10:07):
the producers and directors are looking for. They can give you a note or
a switch, you know, theygive you a beat change, and from
there you can then redirect your auditionprocess and take those notes in and give
the audition that they're actually looking for. So those are the negative side of
(10:31):
the positive sizes. You get toaudition in your own space. You get
to audition on your time. Youhave a deadline usually forty eight hours to
submit, so that anxiety is gone, the audition anxiety of going in the
room. But then it's added awhole another element of like now you have
to find a reader. Now youhave to shoot the audition yourself, you
(10:54):
have to edit the audition yourself,you have to schedule this whole thing.
So it becomes beingnciety. Now becomesof the production side of things, and
you kind of are taken away fromjust being the actor. You know.
This upsize and downsides to everything.Yeah, when you mentioned you've been on
the casting side too, what haveyou observed in other actors when you talked
(11:18):
about the desperate actor versus the onewho's I don't know, maybe lost or
maybe really in their craft and they'rereally in their character, Like what what
do you see a lot of thetime? And then how do you I
don't know, in this industry,how do you deal with that with some
seeing that there are people that arein it, maybe for different reasons than
(11:41):
you are, or for reasons thatyou believe are wrong. I guess everyone
sees that differently, you know,but how have you observed that as the
person casting well as the person casting? I mean, for me, it's
all what serves the story, whoplays the character the best right, and
what person serves the story the most? I mean I had a teacher a
(12:03):
long time ago when I was doinga lot of stage work. They were
like, for you to get ridof that auditioned anxiety, get out of
your own way, stop thinking aboutwhat your needs are, Like I should
not be thinking what Leonardo wants.I shouldn't be thinking what Leonardo needs.
I should be thinking about what doesmy character want? What does my character
(12:26):
need? And then from there youkind of start to dissolve those anxieties because
it's not about you, it's aboutthe scene, it's about the character,
it's about the story, and ouronly purpose is to serve a story.
Actors, I mean, we allget in our way sometimes because we want
and I'm guilty of this as well. It's like we want to sometime we
(12:46):
want to move our career forward.You know, it's tough because you tie
in your career, your art,your form of expression, and how you
make money are all tied into thesame thing. So those things can get
in the way. Sometimes the egoof yourself of wanting to move your career
forward can get in the way ofjust the character and the story. And
(13:07):
I've been at fall of that orfor sure, and so being on the
other side, I mean a lotof the times too, is do they
fit the role? Are they rightfor the role? Are they what you
imagined for the role? And that'sanother thing that we have to take an
advantage because there are so many talentedpeople and it's hard to say who's in
it for the right reason or forthe wrong reason. I can't say what
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your reasons are are right or wrong. I can only say for me,
for the character, it's and forthe actor it's whoever fits the role,
looks the part, hits the beatsand really brings something that even I wasn't
expecting for. And that's also somethingI strive to do, is like make
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it authentically mine, do something thatis different, take those risks, because
those risks, you know, theycan either fail or they can get to
the job. And that's the sowhen you're seeing certain actors as you're auditioning
them, it's the same thing.And that actually has allowed me to kind
of see what it's like on theother side, so that I can then
(14:11):
apply that into my own way oflike knowing. You know, you can
crush this audition and it can bethe best audition ever, but if casting
wants that to be a woman orsomeone of a different ethnicity, then I
can't do anything about that. It'sjust it is what it is, you
(14:33):
know, And so you can onlygo in there, serve the story,
give it your all, and knowthat no matter what it's like, this
was mine for this moment, forthese twenty five minutes, this is my
character, and this is exactly howI'm gonna play it. I'm gonna have
fun doing it one way or another, and that's where you find the solace
in it. Yeah yeah, andthe fun's just saying yeah, yeah.
(14:58):
You do mix like your livelihood withyour dreams, and it's a hard thing
that like intersection is weird, youknow. I mean, I definitely feel
like you can apply that to alot of industries and a lot of different
professions, but I definitely feel likewith entertainment, it's I guess some of
my favorite actors, I know,they traveled from la you know, with
(15:22):
like no money as teenagers and triedto work their way up and really make
money. But at the same time, they were just like kids who grew
up since like the age of likethree, doing theater and plays and like
performing for anyone possible. Like Ithink of comedians too, actually, which
sort of falls in the same industry, but they, like some of my
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favorite comedians have done it for decadesand people are like, really, I've
only heard of you recently, andit's like, well, I've been doing
this for like thirty years, huh. It's taken this long for me to
get some recognition, and that,you know, means this is why you're
here today watching my show, right, that's the recognition so interesting. People
(16:06):
don't see that behind the scenes.I definitely feel like that's the act situation
here. There's an inside joke whereit's twenty years for overnight success. Also,
I believe Meisner said that too,it's like twenty years to become an
actor. And I think it's ina way that is true. It's like
you have that time to the tenthousand hour rule from Malcolm Gladwell. It's
(16:26):
like the time you put into itis for your mastery. But yeah,
it takes a lot. You know, it's a long road and not for
all. You know, some getit early on and keep going and crushing
it, some fade away, andsome hit their marks later on in life,
you know. So it's one ofthose things where, again the inside
(16:48):
joke here is twenty years for overnightsuccess. You're like, oh wow.
Like Major Brescal for instance, youknow, he just within the last five
ten years really came out to bethis huge, huge number one day listener.
But you got to think, like, when's the when did you see
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you in his twenties? Do youknow of anything in his twenties? What
is the first, what is thefirst rule that you can think of?
And for me, that's Scheme ofThrones. That's the first time I ever
saw Vator of Brescal. It's funto realize. It's like, yo,
everyone has their own time, andyou can't compare your journey with anyone else's
because you can't. It's just different. You have different backstories, different livelihoods,
(17:32):
you have different upbringing. There's justno way to say like one way
or another. The only thing youcan do is just never quit. Yeah,
that's the only way that you're notgoing to succeed. How have you
found ways to? I guess letthe industry chase you and you not like
run to it. How have youhow have you done that? Yeah?
(17:55):
I love that because that is definitelysomething that has suck with me. Letting
in the industry come after you.As a lot of artists say that,
you know. For me, youknow, I just constantly am writing.
I'm constantly doing. I started myproduction company in twenty eleven and started doing
my own short films. I startedwriting my own stories, writing my own
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characters. I also train a lot. I go to different schools, but
this one particular he's awesome. Johnis the best. John Hydman, love
him to death, love the pieces. You know, he's just such a
brilliant, brilliant storyteller as the writerdirector. And we go and we play.
(18:38):
We find our ways and we findour voice and we find new things
about ourselves. He says things like, we're not here to do things that
we can do really well. We'rehere to expand try new things, fall,
get ourselves back up. And that'sexactly what I've been doing, is
like, find the joy, thefun in the work and not we're necessarily
(18:59):
worrying about what the outcome is,you know. I think Deepak Chopra says
something like that. You know,it's like for it to truly be joys,
it's find the joy in the actitself, not into the the outcome,
because the outcome we can't. Wedon't know what the outcome is going
to be. We think sometimes wethink our worst audio. It's crazy.
(19:22):
Sometimes the worst audition is the thingthat actually books the job. We think
we do terrible, and we actuallybook it from the worst one and the
one we think we crush. Wenever hear anything. It's crickets. So
it's like again finding the joy,and that's kind of how I every character
that I do now, every auditionthat I do, now, it's having
the fun in that and knowing thatthat was my moment to have this character,
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and I got to hold onto it. And if I get the chance
or the opportunity to evolve and growthat character on screen or stage, then
that's just the icing on the top. You know, that is the moment
of yes, I've got something herethat I get to evolve more and I
get to hold onto this thing justa little bit longer, and it kind
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of gets away of it gets outof the way, and all those feelings
of like, oh, I needa book this because then I'll make my
career. Or I need to holdonto this because otherwise I'm never I'm going
to age out. You know,I'm not gonna I'm not gonna hit it.
If I don't hit it now,I'm never gonna hit it. You
know, all those things float inyour head constantly, and the trick is
(20:32):
to not let those things hold on, you know, let them for me.
It's like, look, I letthose feelings flow through me and it
may not seen it. You know, like people are like, man,
you're so so calm, collected,He's like, sometimes I think you're just
floating. You're so zen, AndI'm like, bro, if you actually
knew the thoughts like flow it throughmy head, I'm like, I am
right there with you. Man.Like a lot of my active friends,
we have these same discussions because weall go through the same kind of feelings
(20:56):
about our career. So I letthe feelings flow through me. I just
don't allow them to stay, youknow, like it's almost like a stagnant
pond. If you hold onto thosefeelings, those things will start to fester,
they'll start to really get nasty.So I have the feeling I had
the thought, I process it,I see where it's coming from, and
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I let that thing flow through me, and then it's out. And then
I remember why I'm in this fromthe beginning, you know, Like why
did I decide to do this isI'm a storyteller. I love telling stories,
I love entertaining people. I lovebeing different characters and playing dress up
and you know, going on stageand living a whole new life. You
know, these are all such funexperiences, and through that I brought a
(21:41):
lot of joy. And then alsothe collaboration on set. You know,
these are all things that getting tomeet new people, getting to being new
people are the things that keep memoving forward and making me feel like,
Okay, those those things won't stick, you know, those things won't hold
on, and it makes life somuch better, you know. Yeah,
(22:07):
yeah, that's a beautiful thing.The craft is the process of building.
The craft is such a beautiful thing. I do think there's less appreciation on
the process of anything than there islike the result, because the result is
something we can't control, and welove to control things we can't control,
because you know, we're human.But at the end of the day,
(22:33):
like what can you do? Andagain like it's so it's so true with
everything, but I can I reallyI yeah, holding on to that.
There's certain times we say in Classtwo it's like we're here for process,
not performance. We're here for theprocess. And I think it's with anything.
It's like you can take it asmacro as it's the journey not the
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destination. You know, these arecliches, but in a way, I
think that goes to the micro ofyour career, your craft, whatever it
is that you find joy in.It's the process of actually doing it.
You know, it's a top ofit, like acting. Most of the
acting work really is not even onstage. The process is reading the script
(23:27):
twenty times over and over and overagain. Backstory work, you know,
going in and creating these memories anddoing this research. It's research, it's
backstory work. It's filling in eachline. John says, this thing noun,
image, story, feeling. Whereverthere's a noun, right, dude,
(23:51):
this guy's a genius. I love. That's cool. Yeah, so
whenever there's a nouns And I alsotrained with another, like also trained with
Debaquilla. She's awesome. Debah Equillabrilliant too, very Adler based, all
Adler based. And so between thesetwo is like I stepped away from using
(24:15):
my own personal life backstories to fillcertain things because again we're just telling emotional
stories and you have to be emotionallycharged to tell these stories. So instead
of creating and using my own Icreate memories that are of and from and
(24:40):
by my character. Whatever is goingon, whatever fills. And so now
the noun in the story needs tohave an image because as humans, we
think in images. You know,you think of an apple, and an
apple to you be an apple differentto me if I said to you a
face mask pre twenty twenty, Pretwenty nineteen, if I said face mask,
(25:03):
you would think doctor. If Isay a face mask, do you
now you think of lockdown and thatwhole thing of how a face mask became
so polarizing in a country. Youknow. So now a face mask,
if you said face mask before twentytwenty, I'd probably think, oh,
Scarecrow from Batman begins there, yougo, so excuse and so that gives
(25:26):
you a different feeling. You're laughing, You're like, oh, Scarecrow,
tell that. And now I thinkfaceback, You're like, oh, man,
that's stupid that, you know,like, ah, this whole thing
that happened, we had a wedidn't know what was happening. You know,
There's there's fear, there's anxiety,there's charged duality behind it, because
you know the division that a facemask calls within our country. I don't
(25:48):
want to go into too much politicshere, but like people got angry about
a face mask, you know that. So like all these different emotions that
are charged behind it. So asour work as actors, we see it
now, whether it's from your linesor from my lines, you have to
put an image behind that, andthen from that image. You have to
attach a feeling. So now Isay face mask and I think oh man,
(26:10):
scary instead of oh man, youknow, comedy, and then the
story behind that, and so eachthing has to have that whole feeling behind
like why do I feel this way? You know? And it's funny doing
this work this way has then kindof turned the lens inside onto myself and
now I'm able to do the samekind of like reverse engineering. Like if
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I act a certain way or dosomething or I'm feeling something, I go
backwards. I'm like, Okay,why am I feeling this? Where is
this coming from? What is thestory? What is the image? What
is the feeling that this is coming? Okay, this is why this is
happening, or this is why I'mfeeling this way. Now I know why.
(26:55):
I don't need to feel this wayanymore, or I can put things
in place where I don't have tofeel that. As Leo the human,
you know, as the actor,I have to throw myself into these situations
all the time, and so it'slike, oh, okay, I get
to feel terrible right now, youknow, like I'm going I have to
feel these feelings because it's the storythat serves, it serves the story,
(27:18):
or it serves the character. Yeah, it's funny in comedy, and in
drama more often than that, it'snot necessarily so much fun because like from
just comedy, it's basically the sameas drama, but like heightened erroneous circumstances,
they're still going through that. We'restill going through it, you know,
(27:38):
we're still going through this thing.It was funny is last night I
was in class and we were oneof the things that we were talking about
it was this quote from Young andI'm going to butcher it, but it
basically said how the way life wefind ourselves is through the failure of our
(28:07):
own disbeliefs of who we are,and through these we find what we really
become. And that is so paraphrase. I mean, do not quote me
on this, go look it up. But what it's really saying is through
stories, the hero has to fail, has to overcome as to so the
(28:30):
fear of the hero has to fail, has to overcome, has to fight
his demons or their demons, herdemons, all these demons to overcome to
become a new evolved version of themselvesas this new hero. And the reason
why we tie. These stories ofthese stories are so why they work because
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there has to be conflict, otherwisewe're not really watching a story is because
we deal with that with our minds. We constantly are overcoming things. We
have these high winds, these lowlosses, and these in betweens, and
that's life, you know, that'sthe life that we have to like overcome.
That's life that we evolve from.We're constantly evolving, we're constantly growing,
(29:18):
we constantly have new trials and tripilations. We also have you know,
huge wins and from these things,that's our own hero's journey that we keep
going through. And I feel likethat's why we love either hero's journeys or
cautionary tales. You know, cautionarytales tell us what not to do.
Hero journeys show us. You know, it's part of the process. You
(29:41):
know, the process is it's okayto fail, it's okay to get you
know, through failure is where successis found. Just shows like what is
that saying from Thomas Edizen. Hefound ninety nine ways how to not make
a light bulb before he found theone way to make a label. Yeah,
(30:02):
it's so true, It's so sotrue. The the funniest thing to
me is that, like, uh, I think it's so cool that what
actors get to do, they're liketheir craft is so interesting because they're still
themselves. You as just you areon this journey of you growing as an
(30:23):
actor, succeeding, uh, failing. There's great things, there's bad things,
but you're you're generally you're evolving andchanging and growing. But at the
same time, you're going through allof these different characters, and you're changing
while you're playing them, and thenyou're experiencing yourself while playing another, and
(30:45):
then again like the I'm like obsessedwith watching interviews of like actors and like
the Panels, and I grew upwatching them so much. And the one
thing they always said was like,we love it. We love acting because
it's an escape to like take ourselvesout of our journey and really like like
(31:06):
drown ourselves in a character. AndI guess, like, do you find
yourself doing that or do you findyourself kind of being your authentic self like
in a character and weaving those twotogether to really build your version of the
character. You Know, It's funnybecause I can see both sides of those
things, and I have experienced bothboth of those things, right, the
(31:30):
escape and also but I would loveto say, like for me, I
find myself in my characters. Iconnect in a way because I have these
experiences that I would never have withoutany consequences. I get to live a
(31:51):
thousand lives and make a million mistakesand learn from those mistakes authentically in the
moment. Because when you're the character, you are the character. Yes,
you are yourself. You are yourselfas the character. You have now become
this person, this thing, whatever. If you play a creature, I
(32:14):
guess that's a little different, butwhatever you're playing, you are this character,
right, So you're living experiencing everythingas this character. Your body doesn't
know the difference. Your body doesn'tknow whether it's make believe or not.
It's feeling happiness, it's feeling joy, it's feeling sadness. So a lot
(32:35):
of these characters that I've played inmy life have had to have these hard
moments, these hard moments to learnfrom and to grow from. And in
those moments, I've been able tofeel that and take a lot of that
and use it within myself. It'sone of those things where like, yes,
the escape from the day to dayof your own life into this other
(33:00):
world. I don't I don't lovecalling it an escape. You know.
It's it's not like I'm running awayfrom something. It's not like I am
freeing myself of something. Like Isaid, If anything, I'm finding even
more about me than I never knewexisted. It's almost peeling the layers back
(33:22):
because again you get to experience awhole other world living, yes, as
yourself, but as this person.It's it's almost, in a way kind
of like a disassociation where it dependshow deep you go into the character you
start feeling and thinking and becoming thisthing. It's no different than like,
(33:46):
for instance, the server voice.You know what I'm talking about, Like
I'll be talking to you or theor the hospital rest, okay, so
you know that place. It goesfrom like you're just talking like this with
your friends and you're like, ohmy god, hi, how can I
help you? What? The samething goes with you know, your mom
(34:08):
or your parents call you and you'relike out and now it's like, oh
hey mom, yeah, okay,yeah, no, I'm good. I'm
good. Yeah, don't worry,I'm good. All right. I love
you too. But and then youtalk with your homies You're like, yeah,
it's up right. So you havethese different personas of yourself with all
these different roles. Like again,you're going into an interview with a big
(34:30):
firm, You're going to start standingup a little straighter, You're gonna start
talking a little differently, your bodylanguage changes. You're not going to be
cussing in front of a company likehe normally would. Like, right now,
I'm holding back saying certain phrases oflike cuss words that I would normally
be saying, you know, becauseyou have this professional microphone in front of
(34:52):
me that says, oh, Ihave to put on this hat right now,
I have to put on pr leohat, you know, instead of
like I am just hanging out insweats with my homies, you know,
watching some soccer or football, youknow whatever. You know, we do
that in our day and day life. It's it's kind of that, and
(35:14):
then times a thousand for characters.You know, it's because now you are
putting on this hat, if youwill, of this character, and then
it comes with all the emotions andall these backstories and all these feelings and
this whole other life that you've createdfor this character, and now you're living
in that world and as that character. And so I think it was George
(35:37):
R. R. Martin said thatthe person who reads gets to live a
thousand lives. So it's the samekind of a concept as an actor.
It's that's cool. You know.Again, most of the quotes unquoting are
all paraphrase, so don't take anycase value. I'm gonna just a generalization
that I have taken and it filteredthrew my lens. And that's the way
(36:01):
that I have taken these quotes.Again, I could be actually nailing these
quotes. I could, you know, I just want to put that little
footnote but with any of my quotes, just already to say that here.
But it's the same way. It'sthe reason why I love acting so much
is because I get to experience theselives, these wins, these losses,
(36:22):
and at the end of the day, I can take that hat off,
put it in the closet, neverhave to see that again or come back
to it, put it back on, and it comes back and it comes
back evolved. I've had this ceilingwith plays that I've done. I did
this one play years ago, yearsago. It was amazing, and everyone
said, wow, you know,we saw this on Broadway, we saw
(36:44):
this on the West End, andthis was the best version I've ever seen
it. And then put that hataway, you know that the it ended,
and I'll have to go back topost show blues. That'll be a
different I'll have to table that forthe next moment. But that put that
hat away, you know. Andthen five years later, I get a
call saying, hey, there's aproducer that wants to put this back on.
(37:07):
Are you down? Do you wantto do it? And I'm like,
ah, man, I don't know. I think I'm done with that
character. You know, I don'tknow if I want to. Oh yeah,
And then it was like, well, you know, we had so
much fun, we should do it. Okay, fine, let's do it.
I'm down. And then going backinto the character, it's amazing what
you find. It's amazing what Ifound. You know. It was I,
(37:28):
in five years evolved as a man, as a human, as an
actor. I found all these newmoments that I never saw before because now
I'm coming at it with a differentlens, and it involved lens because I'm
not the same person that was yesterdaynor five years ago or ten years ago.
We constantly evolved, We constantly change. And so going back to it
(37:49):
with all the original feelings and allthe all those old memories that I placed
in and then adding to it anddeepening it and deepening it and deepening it,
I found so many new things.And the crowd. We had people
that saw it the years before,the five years before, and then saw
it again, and they and theycame back and like, oh my god,
(38:12):
it was amazing the first time,but this time, wow, you
know, it just that's awesome,amazing, you know, And I get
to hear from people, like peoplewere talking about it months afterwards, and
friends were talking about it, likebecause a friend of mine brought someone that's
in the industry, but it's fromhe's from Florida, and he was like,
dude, we talked about that fordays, and he told all his
friends how he went and saw HollywoodTheater and how amazing is that? And
(38:37):
the other was and it's cool tosee that. It's cool to feel that.
It's cool to be a part ofthat and understand, like, you
know, we never actually let goof those things. We might put them
aside, but those characters still livewithin us. Somewhere deep down inside.
And I think that's with anything.You know, you have all these things
that all these lives that you livedwithout being an actor as a human being.
(39:04):
An actor, I find the comfortabilityin the uncomfortable of learning that I'm
going to grow from this. AndI think that's what I use in my
life, is that no matter whathappens right now in this moment, I'm
going to grow from this, andthat's where I find my comfort. I
think I'm a creator. I loveto create, whether it is with my
(39:28):
hands or with my mind, orwith my thoughts or with my emotions.
That's how I continually find happiness isthe process of creation. If you had
(39:54):
to choose, I know it's hard, especially as an actor, because there's
so many great movies out there.But if you had to choose a top
five or just some of your favoritemovies, either in recent years or just
as a kid, what would yousay were like the top tier films for
you? To start off? JurassicPart I remember watching Jurassic Park, the
(40:20):
original when I was a kid.Not only did I I remember watching it
on a tube television when we stillhad VHS, so we would have Blockbuster
and I'm aging myself here now.So there's you know, the VHS into
the VHS player, watching it ona tube television, and I remember for
(40:42):
the first time seeing like a filmproduced by directed by Steven Spielberg, right,
And so that was the first timeI saw that this was not just
it was like a production, youknow, there's a production behind it.
I saw that, oh, therewere people behind this thing. I was
a kid, so I think I'dbe like, I don't even know six
somewhere around that. So for thefirst time, it started registering, opening
(41:06):
credits started registering my brain. Andthen watching a film about dinosaurs, you
know, and I mean the CGIwas this whole new thing. And so
that film blew me out of thewater as a kid, and I still
love it. I mean, I'llI have so much respect for that film.
(41:28):
I love it so much. Iloved Gladiator Gladiator because I love the
story arc behind a general that becomesa slave that then defies an emperor and
you know, like so and thenRussell Crowe just crushing that film, you
know, like it was such sogood. Loved him and I loved all
the behind the scenes behind it oflike that scene, that moment of like,
(41:52):
are you not entertained? You know, like and he's like, oh,
are you not entertained? That wasall improv Apparently the extras were being
a little rowdy and I guess RussellCrowe kind of had it up to hear
with them. And then that scenewas that scene. You know, he
(42:14):
kept his character, He stayed incharacter and made brilliant moment. You know.
That's the beautiful thing. And sometimessome of the best they call him
happy accidents. You know, youthink, oh, this is going to
be terrible and it turns out tobe the best thing. I think that
also goes with life. You know, we learn not only from the stories,
but also telling the stories.
Hey, thanks for joining us andtuning in to my podcast, Curious and
Uncomfortable. I'm Niri. You arecreator, producer, and host. This
podcast is an exploratory conversation where twopeople come together and talk about being uncomfortable.
I have guests come on from allover the country, from various walks
(00:20):
of life and unique professions, andtogether we question all things uncomfortable through many
lenses society, lifestyle, politics,culture, and more. In doing this,
our conversations are real, perceptive andnatural. They aren't scripted, and
most of the time they aren't evenreally planned. We're just two curious people
(00:43):
eager to answer some questions. Soopen your mind, listen, and learn.
Let's be curious together. Hello everyone, Welcome back to Curious and Uncomfortable.
(01:17):
If you're new here, welcome.This is episode ten and our guest
today is Leonardo. Leonardo is anactor who currently lives in la He has
been working almost his whole life sincehe was a teenager, but really he's
been doing feeder and plays and performingfor his family and friends since he was
(01:38):
a kid. We talk about somany different things today. We talk about
playing a character and what that's like. We talk about what it's like to
be an audition room and what theauditioning process is like. We talk about
how to be authentically yourself in thisindustry, and how to let the industry
chase you and you not chase it, and in the beauty of building your
(02:00):
craft as an actor and enjoying theprocess as much as the result. At
the end of the episode, wedo have a little segment where Leonardo shared
some of his favorite films and maybesome facts about them that you didn't know.
So without further Ado, let's getcurious with Leonardo's a picture for me
(02:32):
of your first experience in an audition. Yeah, okay, yeah, my
first experience. I mean, I'mtrying to remember the first experience. There
was that stick out. You mean, you have to get these sides right,
and you learn your lines as bestas possible, and you go in
(02:53):
there and you try to give ityour best shot. Right. So there's
a couple of different things that stickin my mind. One and these are
all different experiences of all different auditionsand all compiling because they kind of all
just come together. One, yougo to the room and there are like
twenty people that look exactly like you, you know, and so you're like,
(03:16):
oh cool, all right. Thenthere's you know, the nerves that
kick in. You know, youreally want to get this thing, so
whatever it may be, and soyou're really working on just managing your anxiety
and stress levels and just staying focusedin the character. And as a young
(03:37):
actor, the audition anxiety definitely wouldget the best of me sometimes and you
would go into the scene, meetthe cast and director, into the room
once they call your name, andyou know, those nerves are going through
your stomach, right and you justhave your sides and try to do your
(03:58):
best and take what every direction theycan give you. I know that sometimes
you drop a line and then itjust all starts crumbling down, you know,
and then you're just like, oh, trying to find the find where
you were at, where you're atlooking at the pages and yeah, you
know it was There's been a coupleof those where you drop it and you
(04:20):
just make a fool of yourself andyou're just like, oh, man,
what did I do? And yeah, I mean there's I can definitely say
there was definitely a lot of thosestarting off, because it's all a learning
process and you know, never beingin a room, there's certain things that
(04:43):
get the best of you, andthen from there you just learn and grow.
Do you remember how old you werewhen you had your first audition?
I guess professional and audition, Iwould say like around fifteen, teen fifteen.
It's interesting, you know, likewhen I was fourteen and fifteen,
(05:03):
it just felt like, oh you, you were so naive or I was
so naive in a way that itwas just more of like fun and play.
Then you start learning all these techniquesand start training, and sometimes those
things get in the way. Youknow, It's like you get worse before
you get better. And I rememberthere was a Vampire Diaries audition that I
(05:24):
did long, long time ago,and you know, I had I had
all this like built up, likeoh I got this, I got this.
I got this because I was,you know, training and booking,
and and I guess there was somethingdifferent, like you know, you prepare
for it, and you prepare forit, and you prepare for it,
(05:44):
you run the scene in your head, and I think I was like,
I don't know, eighteen nineteen,I did and I dropped the line and
I was so confident that I forgotmy sides out in the waiting room.
So I'm sitting there with no sidesin hand, and I'm completely blanked,
(06:05):
like what do I do now?How do I get out of this?
And you find you know, Ifound my way. I mean, I
mean the casting director was like,let's do a redirect, Let's try that
again. But you know, atthat point I already lost it. It
was it was one of those thingswhere you know, my confidence got the
(06:29):
best of me, and then itwas like a reality check of like,
yo, you make sure that youhave everything that you need, Like you
always want to have your sides onyou, especially in the audition room,
because there's variables that you just youcan never imagine that will happen. You
know, the nerve, your nerveswill get the best of you. Your
brain will just blank, Like Icouldn't believe my brain blank. I knew
(06:50):
those lines forwards and backwards, andmy brain just blinked. And I didn't
have my sides on me, andI looked very green and I get and
I did not get that role.Yeah. Wow, that's so interesting.
Wow. So it's interesting that wethat building up all this confidence does the
(07:12):
opposite of what we think it'll do. I mean, we think it's gonna
well, not all the time,I guess, but I mean for me,
like taking a test, I buildup all this confidence to take it.
I'm like, oh, I gotthis, Like I don't even need
another review. I'm good and Igo in and then I'm like, oh,
I don't remember any of the formulas, none of the principles. Like
you asked me what this is andI couldn't tell you. But you asked
(07:35):
me ten minutes ago outside the testingroom, and I got you. But
it's just I don't know. It'sjust when it happens, it feels like
it's out of your control. Sure, sure, I mean you know now.
I enjoy the audition room now.I mean it's a place where you
can create and have the first chancebefore anyone else tags on their thoughts to
(07:56):
the character, so you can bringyour character. I have the chances to
be me and fully be Nowadays,I mean the audition room is kind of
not a thing anymore because everything haskind of gone self tapes. I can
explain that in a minute. Iwill say this one thing, though,
I think there's a difference between confidenceand cockiness, and I think when we
(08:18):
forget, when that line gets crossedover, it's a fine line. It's
a very fine line, and whenwe cross that line over, I think
cockiness got the best of me inthat audition room years ago because confidence,
knowing that having that confidence gives youthe strength and the freedom to play.
(08:41):
Confidence is the thing that we definitelyneed in those rooms. And you can
sense it too, like when I'vebeen on both sides of the audition room,
casting and acting, and you cantell the difference between like a confident
actor, a cocky actor, anda desperate actor. You know there's a
(09:05):
difference between all those three and nervous. You know, we know there's nerves
and so you try to manage itas best as you can. And nowadays,
like I was saying, it's moreself takes or zoom auditions. We
rarely now go into office rarely rarely, I mean commercials. Think that affects
(09:26):
the experience, Yes, I meanyou're not getting the notes of the feedback
immediately anymore. Whereas before you hada casting director, you would be walking
into the room, the casting directorwould know you would be personal moment,
they see who you are outside ofthe character, instead of just seeing whatever
(09:46):
character you might be playing, likeyou might be playing a football player.
One day and a serial killer ofthe next you know, so they're just
going off of your auditions rather thanwho you are. So there is that
element. There's a second element thatyou're missing out on is direct feedback,
where you can get a redirect froma casting director because they know exactly what
(10:07):
the producers and directors are looking for. They can give you a note or
a switch, you know, theygive you a beat change, and from
there you can then redirect your auditionprocess and take those notes in and give
the audition that they're actually looking for. So those are the negative side of
(10:31):
the positive sizes. You get toaudition in your own space. You get
to audition on your time. Youhave a deadline usually forty eight hours to
submit, so that anxiety is gone, the audition anxiety of going in the
room. But then it's added awhole another element of like now you have
to find a reader. Now youhave to shoot the audition yourself, you
(10:54):
have to edit the audition yourself,you have to schedule this whole thing.
So it becomes beingnciety. Now becomesof the production side of things, and
you kind of are taken away fromjust being the actor. You know.
This upsize and downsides to everything.Yeah, when you mentioned you've been on
the casting side too, what haveyou observed in other actors when you talked
(11:18):
about the desperate actor versus the onewho's I don't know, maybe lost or
maybe really in their craft and they'rereally in their character, Like what what
do you see a lot of thetime? And then how do you I
don't know, in this industry,how do you deal with that with some
seeing that there are people that arein it, maybe for different reasons than
(11:41):
you are, or for reasons thatyou believe are wrong. I guess everyone
sees that differently, you know,but how have you observed that as the
person casting well as the person casting? I mean, for me, it's
all what serves the story, whoplays the character the best right, and
what person serves the story the most? I mean I had a teacher a
(12:03):
long time ago when I was doinga lot of stage work. They were
like, for you to get ridof that auditioned anxiety, get out of
your own way, stop thinking aboutwhat your needs are, Like I should
not be thinking what Leonardo wants.I shouldn't be thinking what Leonardo needs.
I should be thinking about what doesmy character want? What does my character
(12:26):
need? And then from there youkind of start to dissolve those anxieties because
it's not about you, it's aboutthe scene, it's about the character,
it's about the story, and ouronly purpose is to serve a story.
Actors, I mean, we allget in our way sometimes because we want
and I'm guilty of this as well. It's like we want to sometime we
(12:46):
want to move our career forward.You know, it's tough because you tie
in your career, your art,your form of expression, and how you
make money are all tied into thesame thing. So those things can get
in the way. Sometimes the egoof yourself of wanting to move your career
forward can get in the way ofjust the character and the story. And
(13:07):
I've been at fall of that orfor sure, and so being on the
other side, I mean a lotof the times too, is do they
fit the role? Are they rightfor the role? Are they what you
imagined for the role? And that'sanother thing that we have to take an
advantage because there are so many talentedpeople and it's hard to say who's in
it for the right reason or forthe wrong reason. I can't say what
(13:28):
your reasons are are right or wrong. I can only say for me,
for the character, it's and forthe actor it's whoever fits the role,
looks the part, hits the beatsand really brings something that even I wasn't
expecting for. And that's also somethingI strive to do, is like make
(13:48):
it authentically mine, do something thatis different, take those risks, because
those risks, you know, theycan either fail or they can get to
the job. And that's the sowhen you're seeing certain actors as you're auditioning
them, it's the same thing.And that actually has allowed me to kind
of see what it's like on theother side, so that I can then
(14:11):
apply that into my own way oflike knowing. You know, you can
crush this audition and it can bethe best audition ever, but if casting
wants that to be a woman orsomeone of a different ethnicity, then I
can't do anything about that. It'sjust it is what it is, you
(14:33):
know, And so you can onlygo in there, serve the story,
give it your all, and knowthat no matter what it's like, this
was mine for this moment, forthese twenty five minutes, this is my
character, and this is exactly howI'm gonna play it. I'm gonna have
fun doing it one way or another, and that's where you find the solace
in it. Yeah yeah, andthe fun's just saying yeah, yeah.
(14:58):
You do mix like your livelihood withyour dreams, and it's a hard thing
that like intersection is weird, youknow. I mean, I definitely feel
like you can apply that to alot of industries and a lot of different
professions, but I definitely feel likewith entertainment, it's I guess some of
my favorite actors, I know,they traveled from la you know, with
(15:22):
like no money as teenagers and triedto work their way up and really make
money. But at the same time, they were just like kids who grew
up since like the age of likethree, doing theater and plays and like
performing for anyone possible. Like Ithink of comedians too, actually, which
sort of falls in the same industry, but they, like some of my
(15:45):
favorite comedians have done it for decadesand people are like, really, I've
only heard of you recently, andit's like, well, I've been doing
this for like thirty years, huh. It's taken this long for me to
get some recognition, and that,you know, means this is why you're
here today watching my show, right, that's the recognition so interesting. People
(16:06):
don't see that behind the scenes.I definitely feel like that's the act situation
here. There's an inside joke whereit's twenty years for overnight success. Also,
I believe Meisner said that too,it's like twenty years to become an
actor. And I think it's ina way that is true. It's like
you have that time to the tenthousand hour rule from Malcolm Gladwell. It's
(16:26):
like the time you put into itis for your mastery. But yeah,
it takes a lot. You know, it's a long road and not for
all. You know, some getit early on and keep going and crushing
it, some fade away, andsome hit their marks later on in life,
you know. So it's one ofthose things where, again the inside
(16:48):
joke here is twenty years for overnightsuccess. You're like, oh wow.
Like Major Brescal for instance, youknow, he just within the last five
ten years really came out to bethis huge, huge number one day listener.
But you got to think, like, when's the when did you see
(17:08):
you in his twenties? Do youknow of anything in his twenties? What
is the first, what is thefirst rule that you can think of?
And for me, that's Scheme ofThrones. That's the first time I ever
saw Vator of Brescal. It's funto realize. It's like, yo,
everyone has their own time, andyou can't compare your journey with anyone else's
because you can't. It's just different. You have different backstories, different livelihoods,
(17:32):
you have different upbringing. There's justno way to say like one way
or another. The only thing youcan do is just never quit. Yeah,
that's the only way that you're notgoing to succeed. How have you
found ways to? I guess letthe industry chase you and you not like
run to it. How have youhow have you done that? Yeah?
(17:55):
I love that because that is definitelysomething that has suck with me. Letting
in the industry come after you.As a lot of artists say that,
you know. For me, youknow, I just constantly am writing.
I'm constantly doing. I started myproduction company in twenty eleven and started doing
my own short films. I startedwriting my own stories, writing my own
(18:17):
characters. I also train a lot. I go to different schools, but
this one particular he's awesome. Johnis the best. John Hydman, love
him to death, love the pieces. You know, he's just such a
brilliant, brilliant storyteller as the writerdirector. And we go and we play.
(18:38):
We find our ways and we findour voice and we find new things
about ourselves. He says things like, we're not here to do things that
we can do really well. We'rehere to expand try new things, fall,
get ourselves back up. And that'sexactly what I've been doing, is
like, find the joy, thefun in the work and not we're necessarily
(18:59):
worrying about what the outcome is,you know. I think Deepak Chopra says
something like that. You know,it's like for it to truly be joys,
it's find the joy in the actitself, not into the the outcome,
because the outcome we can't. Wedon't know what the outcome is going
to be. We think sometimes wethink our worst audio. It's crazy.
(19:22):
Sometimes the worst audition is the thingthat actually books the job. We think
we do terrible, and we actuallybook it from the worst one and the
one we think we crush. Wenever hear anything. It's crickets. So
it's like again finding the joy,and that's kind of how I every character
that I do now, every auditionthat I do, now, it's having
the fun in that and knowing thatthat was my moment to have this character,
(19:47):
and I got to hold onto it. And if I get the chance
or the opportunity to evolve and growthat character on screen or stage, then
that's just the icing on the top. You know, that is the moment
of yes, I've got something herethat I get to evolve more and I
get to hold onto this thing justa little bit longer, and it kind
(20:10):
of gets away of it gets outof the way, and all those feelings
of like, oh, I needa book this because then I'll make my
career. Or I need to holdonto this because otherwise I'm never I'm going
to age out. You know,I'm not gonna I'm not gonna hit it.
If I don't hit it now,I'm never gonna hit it. You
know, all those things float inyour head constantly, and the trick is
(20:32):
to not let those things hold on, you know, let them for me.
It's like, look, I letthose feelings flow through me and it
may not seen it. You know, like people are like, man,
you're so so calm, collected,He's like, sometimes I think you're just
floating. You're so zen, AndI'm like, bro, if you actually
knew the thoughts like flow it throughmy head, I'm like, I am
right there with you. Man.Like a lot of my active friends,
we have these same discussions because weall go through the same kind of feelings
(20:56):
about our career. So I letthe feelings flow through me. I just
don't allow them to stay, youknow, like it's almost like a stagnant
pond. If you hold onto thosefeelings, those things will start to fester,
they'll start to really get nasty.So I have the feeling I had
the thought, I process it,I see where it's coming from, and
(21:17):
I let that thing flow through me, and then it's out. And then
I remember why I'm in this fromthe beginning, you know, Like why
did I decide to do this isI'm a storyteller. I love telling stories,
I love entertaining people. I lovebeing different characters and playing dress up
and you know, going on stageand living a whole new life. You
know, these are all such funexperiences, and through that I brought a
(21:41):
lot of joy. And then alsothe collaboration on set. You know,
these are all things that getting tomeet new people, getting to being new
people are the things that keep memoving forward and making me feel like,
Okay, those those things won't stick, you know, those things won't hold
on, and it makes life somuch better, you know. Yeah,
(22:07):
yeah, that's a beautiful thing.The craft is the process of building.
The craft is such a beautiful thing. I do think there's less appreciation on
the process of anything than there islike the result, because the result is
something we can't control, and welove to control things we can't control,
because you know, we're human.But at the end of the day,
(22:33):
like what can you do? Andagain like it's so it's so true with
everything, but I can I reallyI yeah, holding on to that.
There's certain times we say in Classtwo it's like we're here for process,
not performance. We're here for theprocess. And I think it's with anything.
It's like you can take it asmacro as it's the journey not the
(22:59):
destination. You know, these arecliches, but in a way, I
think that goes to the micro ofyour career, your craft, whatever it
is that you find joy in.It's the process of actually doing it.
You know, it's a top ofit, like acting. Most of the
acting work really is not even onstage. The process is reading the script
(23:27):
twenty times over and over and overagain. Backstory work, you know,
going in and creating these memories anddoing this research. It's research, it's
backstory work. It's filling in eachline. John says, this thing noun,
image, story, feeling. Whereverthere's a noun, right, dude,
(23:51):
this guy's a genius. I love. That's cool. Yeah, so
whenever there's a nouns And I alsotrained with another, like also trained with
Debaquilla. She's awesome. Debah Equillabrilliant too, very Adler based, all
Adler based. And so between thesetwo is like I stepped away from using
(24:15):
my own personal life backstories to fillcertain things because again we're just telling emotional
stories and you have to be emotionallycharged to tell these stories. So instead
of creating and using my own Icreate memories that are of and from and
(24:40):
by my character. Whatever is goingon, whatever fills. And so now
the noun in the story needs tohave an image because as humans, we
think in images. You know,you think of an apple, and an
apple to you be an apple differentto me if I said to you a
face mask pre twenty twenty, Pretwenty nineteen, if I said face mask,
(25:03):
you would think doctor. If Isay a face mask, do you
now you think of lockdown and thatwhole thing of how a face mask became
so polarizing in a country. Youknow. So now a face mask,
if you said face mask before twentytwenty, I'd probably think, oh,
Scarecrow from Batman begins there, yougo, so excuse and so that gives
(25:26):
you a different feeling. You're laughing, You're like, oh, Scarecrow,
tell that. And now I thinkfaceback, You're like, oh, man,
that's stupid that, you know,like, ah, this whole thing
that happened, we had a wedidn't know what was happening. You know,
There's there's fear, there's anxiety,there's charged duality behind it, because
you know the division that a facemask calls within our country. I don't
(25:48):
want to go into too much politicshere, but like people got angry about
a face mask, you know that. So like all these different emotions that
are charged behind it. So asour work as actors, we see it
now, whether it's from your linesor from my lines, you have to
put an image behind that, andthen from that image. You have to
attach a feeling. So now Isay face mask and I think oh man,
(26:10):
scary instead of oh man, youknow, comedy, and then the
story behind that, and so eachthing has to have that whole feeling behind
like why do I feel this way? You know? And it's funny doing
this work this way has then kindof turned the lens inside onto myself and
now I'm able to do the samekind of like reverse engineering. Like if
(26:34):
I act a certain way or dosomething or I'm feeling something, I go
backwards. I'm like, Okay,why am I feeling this? Where is
this coming from? What is thestory? What is the image? What
is the feeling that this is coming? Okay, this is why this is
happening, or this is why I'mfeeling this way. Now I know why.
(26:55):
I don't need to feel this wayanymore, or I can put things
in place where I don't have tofeel that. As Leo the human,
you know, as the actor,I have to throw myself into these situations
all the time, and so it'slike, oh, okay, I get
to feel terrible right now, youknow, like I'm going I have to
feel these feelings because it's the storythat serves, it serves the story,
(27:18):
or it serves the character. Yeah, it's funny in comedy, and in
drama more often than that, it'snot necessarily so much fun because like from
just comedy, it's basically the sameas drama, but like heightened erroneous circumstances,
they're still going through that. We'restill going through it, you know,
(27:38):
we're still going through this thing.It was funny is last night I
was in class and we were oneof the things that we were talking about
it was this quote from Young andI'm going to butcher it, but it
basically said how the way life wefind ourselves is through the failure of our
(28:07):
own disbeliefs of who we are,and through these we find what we really
become. And that is so paraphrase. I mean, do not quote me
on this, go look it up. But what it's really saying is through
stories, the hero has to fail, has to overcome as to so the
(28:30):
fear of the hero has to fail, has to overcome, has to fight
his demons or their demons, herdemons, all these demons to overcome to
become a new evolved version of themselvesas this new hero. And the reason
why we tie. These stories ofthese stories are so why they work because
(28:55):
there has to be conflict, otherwisewe're not really watching a story is because
we deal with that with our minds. We constantly are overcoming things. We
have these high winds, these lowlosses, and these in betweens, and
that's life, you know, that'sthe life that we have to like overcome.
That's life that we evolve from.We're constantly evolving, we're constantly growing,
(29:18):
we constantly have new trials and tripilations. We also have you know,
huge wins and from these things,that's our own hero's journey that we keep
going through. And I feel likethat's why we love either hero's journeys or
cautionary tales. You know, cautionarytales tell us what not to do.
Hero journeys show us. You know, it's part of the process. You
(29:41):
know, the process is it's okayto fail, it's okay to get you
know, through failure is where successis found. Just shows like what is
that saying from Thomas Edizen. Hefound ninety nine ways how to not make
a light bulb before he found theone way to make a label. Yeah,
(30:02):
it's so true, It's so sotrue. The the funniest thing to
me is that, like, uh, I think it's so cool that what
actors get to do, they're liketheir craft is so interesting because they're still
themselves. You as just you areon this journey of you growing as an
(30:23):
actor, succeeding, uh, failing. There's great things, there's bad things,
but you're you're generally you're evolving andchanging and growing. But at the
same time, you're going through allof these different characters, and you're changing
while you're playing them, and thenyou're experiencing yourself while playing another, and
(30:45):
then again like the I'm like obsessedwith watching interviews of like actors and like
the Panels, and I grew upwatching them so much. And the one
thing they always said was like,we love it. We love acting because
it's an escape to like take ourselvesout of our journey and really like like
(31:06):
drown ourselves in a character. AndI guess, like, do you find
yourself doing that or do you findyourself kind of being your authentic self like
in a character and weaving those twotogether to really build your version of the
character. You Know, It's funnybecause I can see both sides of those
things, and I have experienced bothboth of those things, right, the
(31:30):
escape and also but I would loveto say, like for me, I
find myself in my characters. Iconnect in a way because I have these
experiences that I would never have withoutany consequences. I get to live a
(31:51):
thousand lives and make a million mistakesand learn from those mistakes authentically in the
moment. Because when you're the character, you are the character. Yes,
you are yourself. You are yourselfas the character. You have now become
this person, this thing, whatever. If you play a creature, I
(32:14):
guess that's a little different, butwhatever you're playing, you are this character,
right, So you're living experiencing everythingas this character. Your body doesn't
know the difference. Your body doesn'tknow whether it's make believe or not.
It's feeling happiness, it's feeling joy, it's feeling sadness. So a lot
(32:35):
of these characters that I've played inmy life have had to have these hard
moments, these hard moments to learnfrom and to grow from. And in
those moments, I've been able tofeel that and take a lot of that
and use it within myself. It'sone of those things where like, yes,
the escape from the day to dayof your own life into this other
(33:00):
world. I don't I don't lovecalling it an escape. You know.
It's it's not like I'm running awayfrom something. It's not like I am
freeing myself of something. Like Isaid, If anything, I'm finding even
more about me than I never knewexisted. It's almost peeling the layers back
(33:22):
because again you get to experience awhole other world living, yes, as
yourself, but as this person.It's it's almost, in a way kind
of like a disassociation where it dependshow deep you go into the character you
start feeling and thinking and becoming thisthing. It's no different than like,
(33:46):
for instance, the server voice.You know what I'm talking about, Like
I'll be talking to you or theor the hospital rest, okay, so
you know that place. It goesfrom like you're just talking like this with
your friends and you're like, ohmy god, hi, how can I
help you? What? The samething goes with you know, your mom
(34:08):
or your parents call you and you'relike out and now it's like, oh
hey mom, yeah, okay,yeah, no, I'm good. I'm
good. Yeah, don't worry,I'm good. All right. I love
you too. But and then youtalk with your homies You're like, yeah,
it's up right. So you havethese different personas of yourself with all
these different roles. Like again,you're going into an interview with a big
(34:30):
firm, You're going to start standingup a little straighter, You're gonna start
talking a little differently, your bodylanguage changes. You're not going to be
cussing in front of a company likehe normally would. Like, right now,
I'm holding back saying certain phrases oflike cuss words that I would normally
be saying, you know, becauseyou have this professional microphone in front of
(34:52):
me that says, oh, Ihave to put on this hat right now,
I have to put on pr leohat, you know, instead of
like I am just hanging out insweats with my homies, you know,
watching some soccer or football, youknow whatever. You know, we do
that in our day and day life. It's it's kind of that, and
(35:14):
then times a thousand for characters.You know, it's because now you are
putting on this hat, if youwill, of this character, and then
it comes with all the emotions andall these backstories and all these feelings and
this whole other life that you've createdfor this character, and now you're living
in that world and as that character. And so I think it was George
(35:37):
R. R. Martin said thatthe person who reads gets to live a
thousand lives. So it's the samekind of a concept as an actor.
It's that's cool. You know.Again, most of the quotes unquoting are
all paraphrase, so don't take anycase value. I'm gonna just a generalization
that I have taken and it filteredthrew my lens. And that's the way
(36:01):
that I have taken these quotes.Again, I could be actually nailing these
quotes. I could, you know, I just want to put that little
footnote but with any of my quotes, just already to say that here.
But it's the same way. It'sthe reason why I love acting so much
is because I get to experience theselives, these wins, these losses,
(36:22):
and at the end of the day, I can take that hat off,
put it in the closet, neverhave to see that again or come back
to it, put it back on, and it comes back and it comes
back evolved. I've had this ceilingwith plays that I've done. I did
this one play years ago, yearsago. It was amazing, and everyone
said, wow, you know,we saw this on Broadway, we saw
(36:44):
this on the West End, andthis was the best version I've ever seen
it. And then put that hataway, you know that the it ended,
and I'll have to go back topost show blues. That'll be a
different I'll have to table that forthe next moment. But that put that
hat away, you know. Andthen five years later, I get a
call saying, hey, there's aproducer that wants to put this back on.
(37:07):
Are you down? Do you wantto do it? And I'm like,
ah, man, I don't know. I think I'm done with that
character. You know, I don'tknow if I want to. Oh yeah,
And then it was like, well, you know, we had so
much fun, we should do it. Okay, fine, let's do it.
I'm down. And then going backinto the character, it's amazing what
you find. It's amazing what Ifound. You know. It was I,
(37:28):
in five years evolved as a man, as a human, as an
actor. I found all these newmoments that I never saw before because now
I'm coming at it with a differentlens, and it involved lens because I'm
not the same person that was yesterdaynor five years ago or ten years ago.
We constantly evolved, We constantly change. And so going back to it
(37:49):
with all the original feelings and allthe all those old memories that I placed
in and then adding to it anddeepening it and deepening it and deepening it,
I found so many new things.And the crowd. We had people
that saw it the years before,the five years before, and then saw
it again, and they and theycame back and like, oh my god,
(38:12):
it was amazing the first time,but this time, wow, you
know, it just that's awesome,amazing, you know, And I get
to hear from people, like peoplewere talking about it months afterwards, and
friends were talking about it, likebecause a friend of mine brought someone that's
in the industry, but it's fromhe's from Florida, and he was like,
dude, we talked about that fordays, and he told all his
friends how he went and saw HollywoodTheater and how amazing is that? And
(38:37):
the other was and it's cool tosee that. It's cool to feel that.
It's cool to be a part ofthat and understand, like, you
know, we never actually let goof those things. We might put them
aside, but those characters still livewithin us. Somewhere deep down inside.
And I think that's with anything.You know, you have all these things
that all these lives that you livedwithout being an actor as a human being.
(39:04):
An actor, I find the comfortabilityin the uncomfortable of learning that I'm
going to grow from this. AndI think that's what I use in my
life, is that no matter whathappens right now in this moment, I'm
going to grow from this, andthat's where I find my comfort. I
think I'm a creator. I loveto create, whether it is with my
(39:28):
hands or with my mind, orwith my thoughts or with my emotions.
That's how I continually find happiness isthe process of creation. If you had
(39:54):
to choose, I know it's hard, especially as an actor, because there's
so many great movies out there.But if you had to choose a top
five or just some of your favoritemovies, either in recent years or just
as a kid, what would yousay were like the top tier films for
you? To start off? JurassicPart I remember watching Jurassic Park, the
(40:20):
original when I was a kid.Not only did I I remember watching it
on a tube television when we stillhad VHS, so we would have Blockbuster
and I'm aging myself here now.So there's you know, the VHS into
the VHS player, watching it ona tube television, and I remember for
(40:42):
the first time seeing like a filmproduced by directed by Steven Spielberg, right,
And so that was the first timeI saw that this was not just
it was like a production, youknow, there's a production behind it.
I saw that, oh, therewere people behind this thing. I was
a kid, so I think I'dbe like, I don't even know six
somewhere around that. So for thefirst time, it started registering, opening
(41:06):
credits started registering my brain. Andthen watching a film about dinosaurs, you
know, and I mean the CGIwas this whole new thing. And so
that film blew me out of thewater as a kid, and I still
love it. I mean, I'llI have so much respect for that film.
(41:28):
I love it so much. Iloved Gladiator Gladiator because I love the
story arc behind a general that becomesa slave that then defies an emperor and
you know, like so and thenRussell Crowe just crushing that film, you
know, like it was such sogood. Loved him and I loved all
the behind the scenes behind it oflike that scene, that moment of like,
(41:52):
are you not entertained? You know, like and he's like, oh,
are you not entertained? That wasall improv Apparently the extras were being
a little rowdy and I guess RussellCrowe kind of had it up to hear
with them. And then that scenewas that scene. You know, he
(42:14):
kept his character, He stayed incharacter and made brilliant moment. You know.
That's the beautiful thing. And sometimessome of the best they call him
happy accidents. You know, youthink, oh, this is going to
be terrible and it turns out tobe the best thing. I think that
also goes with life. You know, we learn not only from the stories,
but also telling the stories.
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