Ep #6: Anonymous - The Diplomatic Warrior

In this episode, we will learn from an anonymous guest. He is an Army Special Forces Weapons Sargeant -- also known as a Green Beret. Together, we explore his difficult journey through childhood and adulthood, and how he has taught himself to use his intelligence AND bravery to thrive in uncomfortable situations. Listen in and let's be curious together!

Episode Transcript

(00:00):
Hey, thanks for joining us andtuning in to my podcast, Curious and
Uncomfortable. I'm Niri. You arecreator, producer, and host. This
podcast is an exploratory conversation where twopeople come together and talk about being uncomfortable.
I have guests come on from allover the country, from various walks

(00:20):
of life and unique professions, andtogether we question all things uncomfortable through many
lenses society, lifestyle, politics,culture, and more. In doing this,
our conversations are real, perceptive,and natural. They aren't scripted,
and most of the time they aren'teven really planned. We're just two curious

(00:43):
people eager to answer some questions.So open your mind, listen, and
learn. Let's be curious together Today, our anonymous guest is going to talk

(01:15):
about his childhood and how it preparedhim for adulthood. But it's not the
kind of childhood or adulthood you'd probablyunderstand. This guest was selling drugs for
his parents at nine years old andhad a father in prison. Yet he
was an A plus student and afootball athlete, eventually accepted at UC Berkeley
with the option to take a freeride at University of Arizona. Now,

(01:40):
why is he my guest. Heis a special Forces weapons sergeant for the
Army, also known as a GreenBeret, and has made it through a
whole host of shitty situations in histwenty eight years of life. This person
learned that when things were shitty,he could think on his feet. In
this podcast, we will explore histwo opposed forces in his life and how

(02:00):
they actually ended up working together ashe uses his intelligence and bravery to be
the best in his field. Ihope you will learn as much as I
do. He is a powerful andlovely person. Let's get curious with our
anonymous guest in the ballpark, likesix, seven, eight years old,

(02:28):
if I remember correctly, the wholefamily is together. My dad had gotten
out of jail, prison, whatevera couple of years prior to that and
started working, and he was workingbasically like a slave, for terrible money.
My mother wasn't working at the time. You know, I was young.

(02:50):
My brother was in school at thetime. I think we had gotten
out of Section eight housing. Butlike we're living paycheck to paycheck, renting
a house or a town home.Ugn to just you know, pay the
bills and eat decent enough food,and by decent I mean like shit other
than you know, raw noodles andstuff from the like donation pantry or whatever

(03:13):
at the local food what's it called, uh food bank. I was just
living life, you know. Iwas a little kid, so it didn't
really mean much to me. Itwas like, got to be around my
family all the time. I spenthalf my time running around the neighborhood with
the older kids who were into variousbad activities like selling drugs and not particularly

(03:38):
gangbanging or anything like that, butlike very similar. They just run around
and pick fights with random people dothey'd break an enter into people's homes,
into businesses, into whatever they goand you know, shoplift and the whole
nine. Basically whatever you can imaginea hoodlum doing. They were into that.
And of course, being an impressionableyoung kid, I was just tagging

(04:00):
along. And we had broken intolike this local like private school and like
stole a bunch of food or whateverfrom the cafeteria, just being hoodlums,
you know, nothing too crazy,but like we'd not that we thought was
crazy anyways, But on the wayout we ended up getting picked up by

(04:21):
the cops and they ran away.I was too small to get away,
So I got picked up and Ikind of in a stupid way or their
respect, I guess, because likeI didn't tell the police anything. I
just essentially got dropped off at homebecause I was a little ass kid.

(04:45):
And then of course they come overand ask me what happened I was I
didn't tell them anything. Besides Iwas wandering around the school and the doors
were open. Right after that,having gained their respect, if that's what
you want to call it from someshitty individuals, they kind of looped me
into the more like adult side ofthings that they were doing, like criminal

(05:11):
shit. So it was like Istarted, you know, delivering drugs for
them and like they'd pay me moneyor like go and collecting money for them
from people who owed them money.But it was like nothing overly eccentric.
It was just you know, gettinginto the mix everything from like weed to
methamphetamine, cocaine, like you nameit. It was in a baggy that

(05:34):
I handed off to somebody else.Now at this time I wasn't particularly the
one selling, right, I wasjust like the delivery boy and like to
dial this in like this was happeningmore so, and I had like you
know, winter break or summer breakor whatever, and then during school and
stuff like that, it was youknow, pretty busy. My parents did

(05:56):
their best to make sure I couldlike play sports and stuff and like you
know, regular kid things. SoI got prioritized by my parents in that
regard, and I fucking thank themevery day for it. Right, So
during the school year, it wouldbe like, you know, playing football,
playing soccer, wrestling in like clubsand stuff like that. Stupid expensive.
Looking back at it, I hadno idea how they were fucking pulling

(06:20):
that off. I was a troublemaker, but like got good grades, right,
Like, I'd get into fights everyday, and I spent more time
I think in the principal's office andother classrooms than the classroom I was supposed
to be in because I was inso much trouble all the time. But
you know, the adults respected mywork ethic towards class, so I didn't

(06:42):
really get like suspended or kicked outof school. So it was like,
you know, straight a kid,and like all the whatever they called it
back then, like the gifted programsor whatever. Right, So that kind
of like saved my ass from havingto bounce around schools pushing out past.
That's where I really got into actuallydoing stuff to make money, not just

(07:04):
like being a delivery boy. Myparents at the time didn't have any idea
what was going on, but itwas just me and my brother running around,
you know, selling drugs, beingfucking hooligans and uh it was like
at school would be fighting all thetime. When I wasn't at like football
practice after school or something like that, I'd be running the streets fighting the

(07:25):
local kids or sometimes adults they'd runinto, you know, it's kind of
bopping around the streets. Two thousandand eight was like the big fucking housing
bubble crash thing and the house gotforeclosed on. So that's when, like,
you know, we were really scrapingby to try and keep a float

(07:46):
in that house. And that's kindof when I transitioned over to like letting
my parents know, like, hey, I can help you guys with stuff
because I've been making money. Likeat that point in time, I was
like ten. At that point,I had been you know, selling drugs
on my own with my brother.I had saved up like a couple thousand
dollars, like just in a piggybank, you know, like in that no

(08:07):
one had any idea about it.I was just putting money away. So
I gave that to my parents alittle too late. They were dumbfounded,
curious where it came from. Butwhen I came clean, it was like,
yeah, I've been selling drugs whatever. That kind of took them by
surprise, but not very not asbig of a surprise you thought, because

(08:33):
I didn't know this until I hadcame clean on that. But they were
also still doing that, selling drugsright as like my dad went to jail
for it, and they continued todo that, and that's how we like
paid for everything. I didn't knowthat. I figured they were just doing
it through work. But that's kindof when I tied in and started like
helping my parents out by helping themsell stuff and then giving the money to

(08:54):
them to pay bills. Right,So do you think it came off as
a surprise because you were so differentin school because you kind of had two
different lives. Definitely, Like myparents, they thought I was just you
know, the uh, God's giftto man basically, or like the apple
of their eye. Right. Iwas a good kid in school, aside

(09:16):
from like the fights in the timein the principal's office, right, like
little boy stuff. Every boy hasthose trends. They were blown away by
because they had no idea, andlike, normally I'm not a parent,
but you know, I feel likea parent feels like they understand what their
kids are doing and like they cantell what's going on, even though you
know, every kid has their secrets, right, But it was kind of

(09:39):
like a slap in the face tothem. I think the worst thing I'd
been caught for from them, asidefrom like being a little kid stealing a
candy bar from the you know,gas station or whatever, it was like
I would like steal their cigarettes,you know what I mean, And like
I got caught smoking them in mybedroom when I was you know, like
nine or ten, and that waslike the worst of it, right,

(10:01):
And then I came out with this, Actually I've had this conversation with them
as an adult and their thoughts onit, like looking back, was like
they never should have condoned that behavior, right, even though they needed money
and needed help. Were your friendsat school completely different from the older kids
you were around, Like the kidswho played football with and had classes with,

(10:22):
versus the gangs you were involved inon the outside. I typically hung
out with girls more often because I'dspent too much time fighting all the other
boys. It was like the girlswere like the you know, gifted kids,
student body student council types, youknow, like super good, squared
away, nice young women, right, and they had no idea, right,

(10:46):
like they I think at the park. One time, the girl at
the time it was my best friend, was like ran into me at the
park and I was like sitting theresmoking cigarettes at the bench with the kids
that I hung out with outside ofschool. I got a good chewing for
that because it was like the firsttime anyone from school had seen me doing

(11:07):
like nefarious shit and it was justlike smoking cigarettes, right, like not
too crazy of a deal, butit's you know, not a good thing
either. And then the kids thatI hung out with for sports, yeah,
it was like athletic young dude.They probably would have had no idea.
It's like, you know, athleticgood in school, you know,
not behavior wise but grades wise.And then you know, being a straight

(11:33):
up criminal when I wasn't doing anyof that other stuff, right, the
more reasonable things. If you didblend the two worlds, what do you
think would have happened. That's atough one to answer, honestly, because
like I held you know, myfriends at school, the people gave me
the time of day and like lookedpast me being a troublemaker. Right,
I held them to really high esteem. Dudes that I hung out with outside

(11:56):
of school, you know, Ihad a lot of love for them too,
because it was like you'd get intoreal sticky situations, right, like
whether police were involved or like robbedat gunpoint or you know something like that,
Like you know, those dudes haveyour back, and you live under
this impression that like, oh,these dudes will die for me type of
shit, right, And that's notthe case at all, Like they'll throw
you under the bus as soon asanything, you know, threatens their well

(12:18):
being. Right. But I thinkif that would have collided, that would
have I would have had a verytough choice to make. Do I want
to sacrifice the friends who were likeleading me in the right direction, or
sacrifice the friends whom at the timeI thought were like like exemplary people that
showed like loyalty. Right When wereyou able to realize that these kids were

(12:41):
bad news and realize the difference betweenwhat you thought was loyal people that you
looked up to versus friends at schoolthat were leading you down a healthy path.
That kind of realization came, likesome I think it was right around
like the end of midas school,like eighth grade. It was like,

(13:03):
yeah, I was you know,all types of bad shit when things weren't
going right at home, Like Iwas, you know, distraught, I
didn't seek comfort from the dudes thatI ran the streets with, you know,
like I could talk to openly thepeople that I like hung out with
at school and like talk to talkto them about just about anything that wasn't
like, you know, too bad. Whereas like if I talked to the

(13:26):
dudes that I hung out on thestreet, they tell me to quit being
a bitch and like basically get backto work, even though it wasn't really
work. You know, it waslike keep doing what we're doing right right
around the time you're like emotionally unstableas a young man or woman, right
like the beginning of high school,like into middle school type when you start
you know developing uh more thought towardslike your emotional well being. That's kind

(13:56):
of when I had the realization thatlike, Okay, the people that I
hang out with at school actually givea shit. And like, you know,
the friends that I've had now atthis at that point for like five
plus years and like see every dayat school, they actually care. So
I should probably start weighing what theythink and like respecting them a lot more

(14:16):
than the people that I fuck aroundon the streets. Around high school time,
when I had that group of friends, I knew they were real friends
because when I told them like,yeah, I'm applying to colleges and like
I want to you know, actuallypursue an actual career, not like keep
just living in the neighborhood and beinga bum. They were like, hell,

(14:37):
yeah, go for it. Butthen I tell the people who are
strictly on the street side that typeof shit, and they're like, wow,
you're that's retarded, right, that'sa waste of time. You're not
going to get anywhere. And ofcourse the friends that I kept that were
like strictly on the school side,they were all for it right at that
point. They were they were wellaware of what was going on, and

(14:58):
they, you know, the onesthat stuck around, they were pushing hard
for me to like maintain my bearingson like do well, in school,
go to college, get the hellout of here, because if you don't
get out of here, you're goingto end up in prison. Were you
ever able to really confront the guysyou were bomming with on the streets and
say, you know, I'm done, I want to live a better life

(15:18):
and this isn't for me anymore.It's not so black and white as that,
right, Like, you can't justgo to somebody who relies on you
to do a job, and atleast in that side of the world or
in that side of people, right, you can't really go there and be
like, yeah, I'm done workingwith you, done working for you.
Kind of just have to fade outbecause it becomes real confrontational really fast.

(15:45):
If if you basically tell them likeI quit, right, like, that's
a quick ticket to like either gettingthe shit kicked out of you or potentially
even killed. See. I thinkit was like right around the time I
was a senior in high school,like it was all set in stone that
I had, you know, fullride scholarships to go to school, right

(16:10):
that I just like stopped running thestreets. Like one day I just fucking
disappeared. It's like I'm not doingthis anymore. The people who I only
knew through doing you know, criminalshit, I just stopped talking to them.
So now that you've officially decided I'mdone with these people, I'm off
the grid in a sense. Andcollege comes around with a full ride to

(16:33):
University of Arizona, What's next.When I went to school, I made
a handful of stupid decisions that ultimatelyled to me dropping out, Which was,
like I didn't live on campus,I had like housing afford like afforded
in my scholarships. Right, LikeI could have just gone to stay in
the dorms and like focused on school, pulled out like a student loan to
pay off an apartment for you know, a semester, and like end up

(16:57):
staying with like a couple other dudeus that did the same thing, or
like when we're going to community collegenear University of Arizona, and like that
just was the stupidest idea I couldhave ever made, right, or the
stupidest plan I could have ever comeup with, because I wasn't big on

(17:18):
partying, which is why I didn'twant to stay in the dorms. Right,
I got like this weird movie ideathat like everybody in the dorms just
parties all the time and like theyfuck off. Like I wanted to go
there to get the job done,to go to school and learn, which
is also a shock because I wasnever in school. Granted that was like
ap student, straight A's like allthis shit, but it was like I
would never go to school. I'dshow up on test days and like turning
my homework when at the end ofthe week or whatever, I came in.

(17:41):
I didn't realize that college wasn't goingto be like high school and like
I had to go to fucking schoolevery day because like attendance is majority of
your grade. So like I youknow, I was like trying to do
the same thing. And I waslike struggling to get to school because I
lived like six miles off campus andall I had was a skateboard, you
know what I mean, Like Ididn't have a car. It's like three
days a week I had like chemistrylabs at like seven in the morning,

(18:03):
so I had to wake up atlike four and skate five miles to fucking
to the u A take buses ifI had the spare change or whatever,
you know, but like get upstupid early to show up, and I
was just sick of it because Iwas like not not used to doing that,
you know what I mean. Iloved the school portion of it,
but was like not cool with theresponsibility of being somewhere on time. But
we ended up getting evicted from thoseapartments, even though like I paid my

(18:26):
rent up front. We got evictedbecause one of the dudes who was in
charge of the electrical bill, wewere giving him money to pay the electric
bill, but he wasn't fucking payingthe bill. They shut our electricity off,
and like in the lease of thoseapartments, it was like if you
your utilities go out for you know, more than like ten days, you

(18:48):
get evicted. And at the time, my cousin she was also at the
U of A, like a coupleyears ahead of me. She was a
junior when I was a freshman,and you know, I'd go hang out
with them once in a while,like they knew I was there. But
like when I got evicted, Iwas basically like I would sleep at the
student library until like they shut theyclosed the doors down at like midnight or

(19:11):
something like that. Then I'd gosleep in the I forget what the hell
they called it, but like thequad basically like the open area, I'd
just go like sleep there. SoI'd just be like knocked out in the
library sleeping on a desk, andthen someone would be like, hey,
we're closing, get out, andthen outside like campus security. It was
u vase a pretty big campus,so like maybe where I would like tuck

(19:34):
away, it would be kind ofhard to find, be hard to find,
and if I wasn't there, thenit was like at the park,
you know, just off campus,which is like in a real shitty part
of town. Like I was basicallystraight bumming it, you know, homeless.
There was this girl that I hadknown from middle school we went to
different high schools that was also thereas a freshman. Her and I were
acquaintances. She actually found me sleepingout outside coming back from whatever she was

(20:02):
doing at like one o'clock in themorning, and she was like, hey,
man, what are you doing outhere? So I ended up like
you know, spilling the beans.I was like, yeah, I got
evicted from my apartment and like Ihave nowhere to stay. So she let
me sleep on the floor of herdorm room, so I'd sneak in there
at like eleven o'clock at night,sleep on the floor, and then I'd

(20:23):
have to like hide when her girlfriendwould come over to their dorms. She
lived like three doors down, right, and they were just dating or whatever
they were doing, but they'd youknow, spend time together in her room
once in a while, so Ihad to like hide in the fucking closet.
She told my cousin what was goingon. My cousin immediately was like,
you're gonna come live in my apartment. So my cousin likes to party,

(20:45):
right, so she would have peopleat her apartment all the time,
and like, I got back intoselling drugs to make money because of the
fact of the people she'd have comingover. I had my brother drive me
down some shit, and like Iwould sell all her friends fucking drugs and
just you know, make money tofucking eat. In Tucson, it was
mostly just weed. It was like, I didn't really try to get into

(21:07):
the heavier shit because college kids don'treally play that game. So it's like
it and weed was a fucking itwasn't legal then it was not. It
was medically legal, but it wasn'tlike recreational, so everybody wants it.
Everybody wants they can't have, andI had connections for that, so that's
what I'd sell them. Toward theend of the semester, I took all
my finals or whatever. I'd missedschool at that point for like almost a

(21:30):
month straight, so my grades werelike dog shit, and uh, I
took my finals. I thought Iwas going to be really bad. So
like after I finished my chemistry labsand like my chemistry finals and like my
physics finals and all this shit,I like I quit. I was like
I withdrew from school, and thenmy grades got posted the week after I
withdrew. I would have ended upwith like Ce's so correct me if I'm

(21:52):
wrong. But it seems like youhad a bit of a repeat in college
of your double life in middle school. In high school. I mean,
you were home after being evicted,but also loved learning and did decently well
for not showing up to class.It feels like you played the degenerate role
when you needed to, but youalso played the upstanding man role when you
needed to. This double sided lifeis something you've experienced your whole childhood and

(22:15):
a young adulthood. I would goas far to say that with your current
job now that double sided life continues, have you been able to figure out
how to not blend those worlds togetherand know when they need to be separated?
In the special forces deal, right, Like, we still have to
deal with like big army, andlike we also have to go to embassies

(22:36):
and like talk to ambassadors or notambassadors but like their staff, right and
like do really professional stuff. Butat the same time, we also have
to go and deal with like,you know, foreign fighters if we're dealing
stuff like you know, Afghanistan,where it's like they're not professional soldiers for
their country, but they're just likepeople that need to learn how to fuck,

(23:00):
how to fight and like wage warto you know, stand up their
future government or whatever the case is. So it's like it's easier for me
to like do the rigmal role oflike, Okay, I can go talk
to these highly professional, like relativelysnooty people and then also like relate to

(23:22):
you know, the poor, downand out people that we're supposed to train
to fight and like or the professionalsoldiery of a given country. Right,
Like, it won't be I haven'tdone that yet, but it'll it won't
be as difficult, I think,to deal with like their command versus talking
to the soldiers and like build alevel ground of like communication. So I
think that's the biggest ticket of howI learned. What I learned from like

(23:45):
those worlds is like how to communicatewith just about anybody. Wow. Yeah,
it like inadvertently prepared you for itwithout you even realizing it. I
mean, when did military come intothe picture? Middle school? And it
always been like, uh, secondary, not even the secondary dream, if
you will, But like I'd alwayslike fantasized about it because like I read

(24:08):
a lot of like military history andlike a lot of memoirs of soldiers and
like from World War two, WorldWar One, Vietnam and stuff like that.
So like I put that stuff upon a pedestal, right, And
I was like coming out of highschool and I went to college, I
was, you know, I reallywanted to be a chemical engineer, Like

(24:29):
I wanted to do you know,academic stuff. And I came to the
realization when I left college, orlike around the time I was leaving it,
like I want to use my brain. But I feel like a lot
of the stuff that came up,like I also missed using like the physicality
of like you know, playing sports, and like what could I do to

(24:51):
you know, still use my bodybut also use my brain to its full
potential, you know what I mean? Where could I find a spot to
do both? At this time,I was like working and like involved in
a program that my buddy runs calledsolcom Athlete. Like he basically trains dudes

(25:11):
who want to go to the militaryand like is basically a guidance counselor for
young men who want to go tothe military. And at this time,
I was like twenty four, right, Like I wasn't as young as the
dude's there, but I met somevery good people that like I could train
with and like one of my bestfriends now I met there. He's also
an army dude. He's in RangerRegiment. There's not SF, but met

(25:33):
him there. We had different goalsbut trained together all the time. I
laid out like my ideals of like, oh, I want to be with
like the best of the best andlike go hard and you know, do
this war fighter shit. And hewas like, yeah, you're too smart
to be like just a physical specimenis shoots people in the face, though,

(25:55):
dude, Like if you thought aboutlike the Air Force, you know,
like pair of rescue or you know, CCTs or something like that.
And I was like, I don'treally like the vibe of the Air Force,
right, like it's that's more ofa gentlemanly thing. I'm far from
a gentleman like I want to,you know, be down in the shit.
And he was like, what aboutthe Army? And I was like,
I don't know shit about the Army. Like my dad was in the

(26:18):
Army way way way back in theday, right when he was like eighteen,
and that's all I knew. Right, it was like, Army's the
Army. They don't do anything special, right, Like I knew what a
Green Beret was. I knew itlike the Ranger Regiment was, but I
didn't know what their jobs were orlike what it entailed what it took to
be one. But like he convincedme to go talk to an Army recruiter

(26:41):
to like find out what my optionswere with regards to that. So I
went and talked to them and itwas like wow. So basically the gist
I got from the Army recruiter waslike a warrior scholar type of thing for
like a Green Bereat. And Iwas like now that sounds cool. I

(27:03):
didn't know it was a thing atthe time, but it's like eighteen X
rays, like you go through infantryschool like your brother did it, you
know what it is, right,Yeah, so you do all that stuff
frontloaded and then you go to selection. Honestly, I count myself stupid lucky
that I ended up going to selectionin January because it was like colder than
hell. It was like snowing onus and stuff like that in North Carolina,

(27:23):
which is like ridiculous. I discoveredin myself that when stuff really sucks,
I just have a great time.It's like it's like you know,
frostbit fingers and toes and like carryingheavy shit and like, you know,
really sucking through selection. I wasjust happy as could be, you know
what I mean. Some dudes areputting their heads down and like crying to
themselves, and I was just likesinging songs. So I think my like

(27:47):
unique type of crazy got the showin that, and without that, I
don't think I would have gotten pickedup. Honestly. It's like there were
dudes they they're far superior to me, and like physical capabilities and like strength
and speed and you know whatever,and far smarter than me too, like
PhDs and master's degrees and like allthis other stuff. But that's really where

(28:07):
I fell into. Like this ismy niche, you know, like this,
these are my people, This iswhere I want to be. Because
but the vast majority of the dudeswho got picked up thrive in it,
like shit, that just really sucks. They just yeah, they just you
know, put their head down,get to work, and like with a
big old smile on their face.And I just happened to be one of
them. Never met anybody like that, and I didn't know I was like

(28:30):
that until then. Well, also, you have, like you said,
a pretty diverse mix of ages experienceeducation with people in selection. I mean,
some men straight out of high schoolat eighteen nineteen and some with PhDs,
wives and children that are forty.I feel like you had the preparedness
for something like this at such ayoung age, with having the mix of
intelligence and physical capability, so likeI had gone through your trials and tribulations

(28:56):
my whole life, right, andlike everybody so is everybody like that doesn't
make me special by any means,and I'm not special by any means,
right, It's just like everyone's gota unique story. But at the same
time, through that, everyone hasspecial talents and things like that that they
bring to the table. It's justa matter of like figuring out what that

(29:17):
is and utilizing it, you knowwhat I mean. And like I didn't
know what mine was, even thoughI had like dealt with the whole bunch
of shit and like been really coolunder pressure, like my whole life.
Didn't know that that was what washappening, right, Like I was just
you know, doing my thing,but it kind of started to show in
selection. So it was like whenstuff would start getting really shitty, like
I could still like think on myfeet. To touch on like that age

(29:41):
difference thing. The age difference ofdudes as selection ranges from like nineteen years
old to like forty, Like Ithink the oldest dude in my selection class
was thirty seven, even just asa teammate, right of like understanding that,
like everybody has something to bring tothe table. Some dudes just can
really suck through things, but somepeople can't. Like the people who can't
can really think through things, youknow what I mean, Like they there's

(30:03):
a point in selection we have tolike build apparatus out of like not enough
stuff. Like it's just like there'sa like two jeep tires and like a
steel bar and like a thousand poundbarrel. You have to you know,
drag for five miles. Some dudescan't really like think through how to make
that happen, but they can certainlycarry the weight for five miles, you

(30:25):
know, do it with a smileon their face. And there's some dudes
who can't particularly carry the weight,but they can like plan on how to
make it easier by building an apparatus. Everyone has a role, it's just
utilizing that. And that is likea big lesson on life. Some people
are just great at certain things andhave they require no effort to do it,

(30:45):
and other people struggle with certain thingswe're phenomenal at, you know,
something else that also ties into thebigger picture. But I think an issue
that at least I had when Iwas young, and I feel like a
lot of young people do have,is like where does my talent fit into
things? And like sometimes you justyou know, got to go through some

(31:07):
shit to figure it out, youknow what I mean, try certain things
and like that, you have toget over that fear of doing something new.
You know what I mean. That'slike I know I'm good at this,
but like I don't know where thatties into something. Well, you'll
never know until you like try togo do that or like try something that
like falls in line with what you'regood at and that you like to do.

(31:30):
And that's where like a lot ofpeople struggle is uh taking what they
know they like to do and findinga way to help that benefit them in
their life and as well as otherpeople, because there's nothing as rewarding as
like something that benefits you and others. At the same time, the younger
dudes tended to struggle with like checkingtheir emotions and things right, like shit

(31:51):
starts to suck and like they wantto yell and scream and you know,
be dickheads, and like there's notime for that. Like all yelling and
screaming is like getting the way ofthe end goal. And like the older
dudes typically they have like their emotionalresponses in check. But like there's a

(32:12):
tendency of like writing somebody off asbeing immature as an older dude because they
like can't check that shit. Butlike you can't just write somebody off because
they're still learning something, you know, I mean, like how to control
your emotions or like how to navigatecertain things. I'm older and wiser and
blah blah blah blah blah, andlike I can you know, keep it
cool. But finding a place tofit in is like the best thing you

(32:37):
can do and like to benefit yourselfand others because you have something to bring
to the table. It's just figuringout what that something is and utilizing it.
I think that's incredible and becoming onlymore difficult to find these days.
You know people like that, AndI know that's an extreme you know,
special forces, but I really thinkthis can be applied to anything who actively

(33:00):
tries to do hardship willingly because it'shard. Like I don't want to go
really political about like my generation versusyour generation versus like you know what I
mean, There's always people that areused to being comfortable, but it's like
more more now than ever, rightbecause like we live in the now.

(33:22):
This is people can disagree all theywant, but like it's if we live
in the best country in the world, right, Like we have everything you
need at the grocery store, youknow what I mean, you can like
we live a life of luxury andno one's ever had those luxuries taken away,
you know what I mean, Andlike the likelihood of that happening is
like very very slim. So likeas we progress and like technology gets better

(33:45):
and things get easier to acquire andall this stuff, it's it becomes harder
and harder to step outside of yourcomfort zone without actually having to try to,
you know what I mean. Likeif you throw it back to like
even like the nineteen fifties or somethinglike that, nineteen forties, not even
talking like soldiers and war and allthis stuff, right, but like the

(34:07):
day to day life of people backthen was like innately more filled with struggle,
and like you had to be uncomfortablebecause like you couldn't always just like
go to the grocery store, calluber or you know, a door dash
or whatever it is to bring youfood, Like sometimes you had to go
get after it. And it's becomingmore and more difficult for that to be

(34:30):
the way of life. So it'snot particularly anybody's fault, right, Like
you're younger people are used to nothaving to work as hard for stuff.
Not that they don't work hard,don't get me wrong. Like there's certainly
every generation has something hard they haveto work for in order to be successful
or to survive. Right, butit becomes different and it's like outside of

(34:54):
human nature to be comfortable all thetime, like in the time of in
modern time, right, like everyone'sgot their comforts and their their necessities taken
care of and like, but there'salso like more depression, more mental illness
than there ever has been before.I don't personally think it's uh natural for

(35:17):
humans to be comfortable all the time. Comfortable routine becomes mundane, and like
things have become mundane eventually lose yourinterest, but you're stuck doing it because
it's your routine, and you know, you become depressed or like out of
sorts. And I think that's wherelike a lot of people struggle with and
like overcoming fears. Right, peopleare afraid of what they don't know,

(35:39):
and right now everybody knows comfort,so like everyone's afraid to be uncomfortable.
But like some of the best thingsin life are on the back end of
a very uncomfortable situation. If youcould say something to the people who you

(36:00):
don't see the benefit from the discomfort, what would you say as a words
of motivation? Honest This is exactlywhat I would say to somebody that,
like I was trying to motivate toditch the comfort at least a little bit.
It's like, I want you tolook at your life now. You

(36:22):
have everything you need, right somepeople don't, but like you have what
you need to survive and be alive. Otherwise you wouldn't. Are you genuinely
happy doing what you're doing right now? And if the answer is yes,
then keep doing what you're doing.But like if something sucks, it like

(36:43):
makes you uncomfortable and you're not exactlyhappy doing it. When you finish doing
that thing, the like ecstasy thatcomes with like finishing something super hard that's
so vastly polar when you're doing stuffthat you're used to doing, you can
compare that the thing that was reallyhard, so that a way you can
appreciate the fact that this isn't asbad. You know, know when you

(37:07):
need to be uncomfortable, and knowwhen you are okay being comfortable. I
mean, like, because I'm notsaying I don't see how someone would be
able to survive if they're always orthey just go insane. Continued discomfort becomes
the new norm, right, Like, so anything you do long enough becomes
the new normal. So like Ifeel like they wouldn't even recognize that they're

(37:30):
uncomfortable anymore, you know. Yeah, So it's not like I'm saying pendulum
swing, go to the other extreme. But there's something really great about like
consciously recognizing the moment. Okay,I can see that I have the same
daily, weekly routine. What canI do? I mean this is for

(37:52):
the average person, Like what canI do this week to really push myself
and strive for something greater even fromlike if you take out like the you
know, physical fitness side of thingsor whatever, Like doing something abnormal it's
outside of your routine, can beenough discomfort to compare your regular life to

(38:16):
and like give you a reason toappreciate your stuff again, you know what
I mean, Do something difficult foryou, push your boundaries, and like
give you reason to appreciate the wayyou do get to spend your day to day