"HEALING VOICES, NAVIGATING THROUGH GRIEF"

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:14):
Ladies and gentlemen, May I have your attention please? The
show starts in ten lie eight, seven, six, five, four,

(00:37):
three two one.

Speaker 2 (00:42):
Go.

Speaker 3 (00:47):
Oh, hello, and welcome, Welcome, Welcome to the Healing.

Speaker 4 (00:51):
Voice navigating through brief y'all.

Speaker 3 (00:55):
It is our last podcast, y'all. Let us know where
a little thirtieth y'all, we have what I guess I
had it on our play Let me turn that out
because it's drawn in my ears. But welcome, welcome, welcome, y'all.
I tell you, this has truly, truly, truly been a journey.

(01:16):
This has been a journey. It has been an experience.
I hope those that have tuned in have been blessed
by some of the things that we have shared.

Speaker 4 (01:26):
I think I have Charda here with me.

Speaker 3 (01:28):
I'm gonna bring Charda on in the studio and her
interviews herself for y'all for those that don't know me,
while I go ahead and bring Charareda in for those
that don't know me.

Speaker 4 (01:41):
I am the visionary of this podcast.

Speaker 3 (01:45):
I am also the visionary of Aspiring Off this magazine,
which is a sponsor of this podcast. I tell you,
it's truly has been an amazing three years. I tell
you while we decided to add Grief a Grief podcast
because oftentimes we don't have shows on the fifth day

(02:09):
of whatever whatever it is. When we have them fifth days,
we usually don't have individuals to cover those shows. So
we had an opportunity to extend our reach and our opportunity.
So we had an opportunity to, you know, utilize those
those days and come on and share a little bit
about grief as we know it. I tell you there's

(02:34):
so many definitions for grief and so many perspectives on grief,
but as we know it individually. So I want to
go ahead and bring up Chareda.

Speaker 4 (02:44):
If you don't know who I.

Speaker 3 (02:46):
Am, look go ahead and google me. Go ahead and
go over to Mila three. I am the Queen up
collaboration Angela, Thomas Smith and Chareda. Welcome, Welcome, How are
you this evening?

Speaker 2 (02:59):
Welcome to you too. I am doing good.

Speaker 5 (03:02):
I am feeling much better than I had been. I
am the host of Believing the Journey podcast on the
Crew Family Network. I say family Network because we're all
family and we have grown closer over the last three years,
and we are about.

Speaker 2 (03:22):
To be going into year number four.

Speaker 5 (03:25):
So that's a blessing in itself. And we're expanding and
we want those who are gifted in speaking and reaching
the audience through the message that God gives you, we
would like to have you part of the team.

Speaker 3 (03:45):
Definitely, definitely, definitely, I'm telling you space is filling up.
We have a couple more spaces, but I want every
day Sunday through Friday cover. We don't whole shows on Saturdays.
On Saturday is our rest date. That's that's the last
day of the week on the calendar, so for the
for the calendar week. So we utilize that to take

(04:08):
our time off to rest and time and to do
those things that we enjoy doing. But you can guarantee
you're gonna have somebody on every night Sunday through Friday
at eight pm so that you guys, can you know,
get the latest news, see what's going on in the

(04:28):
book world, what's going on in the real world. All
over the world, because we we we be in India,
we be in Pakistan, we be everywhere, we be everywhere where.
Somebody has a story where somebody is believing in their journey,
or somebody may feel like they have been delayed but
not denied or somebody may have a book that they

(04:49):
want to share, but somebody may just want to come
on and share about the basis of light after dark
for things that they can't talk about while their kids
are And then we got.

Speaker 4 (05:01):
We have an ray.

Speaker 3 (05:02):
We have an a ray over here, so you have
an opportunity to really, you know, get to know the
hosts as well as you get to know some amazing
guests that come on and share their story and their
transparency and opportunity to impact lives, like tell them what
our model is.

Speaker 5 (05:24):
We are the change that we want to see. So
if you are a part of that and you see
things that you want to change, be the voice, because
we are that voice and we make a difference in
the world because we follow God's instructions.

Speaker 6 (05:43):
Definitely, I'm telling you, Okay, do you hear that it's bad?

Speaker 4 (05:58):
Where did they go?

Speaker 6 (06:00):
I don't know, Okay, I heard it.

Speaker 3 (06:05):
It might have been on my end because okay, but yeah,
we have a variety of shows individuals able to you know,
express their perspective and to share how they got through

(06:26):
and to share their expert to you. And that's what
it's about. You know, we are supposed to be helped
makes one to another.

Speaker 2 (06:33):
So yeah, yeah, and that's what we do.

Speaker 5 (06:38):
Like it's not just an individual it's a family and
group effort. And anytime you're feeling down, although, you got
somebody that's in your corner that can actually pull you
out of whatever it is that they're going through, because
not only have they probably experienced it, they may currently
be going through it. And you got a shoulder to

(06:59):
lean on, an ear that has some advice because we
range from all different areas and even in age and
everything in life experience. So you got somebody that's there
that can help you through whatever it is that you
are facing and going through.

Speaker 3 (07:21):
Most definitely, most definitely, I tell you, just being able
to reflect and share, you know, maybe the things that
we went through.

Speaker 4 (07:32):
I tell you, I have a.

Speaker 3 (07:35):
New thing that I am noticing that I am grieving
for those that may not know. I was pupuke and
it affected my legs. So you know, sometimes you want
to be strong, you want to press, you want to

(07:56):
be that superwoman or whatever, but you know, I'm realizing
that my body ain't the body it was ten fifteen
years ago, right, and you know you lost some of
that and you got to come to grasp it it
that you know, you ain't never gonna get it's never
gonna be one hundred percent.

Speaker 5 (08:17):
Again, right, And I agree with that completely. Like it
didn't hit me until the other day. Well, it's probably
been about a month ago now. I was sitting in
my car and I was just thinking about the person
I am now and the person I was pre my
stroke or whatever, and then it hit me because I

(08:41):
just recently lost my aunt and I was thinking about
losing my mom and everything, and you know, you become
a different version of yourself, but I never thought about
becoming a different version of myself after having my stroke.
So I never grieved for that person and the person
that I've become. I just had to go with the

(09:04):
punches and go with, you know, everything that was happening
after that. So I never took the time to appreciate
the woman that I was before the stroke to becoming
the woman that I am post stroke, If that made sense, right.

Speaker 3 (09:20):
You know, I look at a lot of different individuals.
I know, individuals that you know, they used to can see,
but now they can't see they lost their sight. Yeah,
having to adjust to that, Like that's a grief, that's
a grieving process. People think this may be going through depression.
It's way much more than depression. Yeah, you you lost

(09:43):
something that you're not you're not going to get back,
you know that's right, that that you just can never
you never get it back, like when you lose those
things that can never be recovered. Like people really don't understand.
But I I just come to realize that that was real.
You know, we often we don't think about a lot

(10:07):
of times that we grieve.

Speaker 4 (10:09):
In different ways than a physical loss of a person.

Speaker 2 (10:13):
Right.

Speaker 3 (10:14):
No, it's so much more than a physical loss of
a person. You think about losing a job that you've
been on for fifty years, and you sixty years old,
seventy years old, and now they talk about learning a
new skill. That's something that you will never be able
to get back. You'll never be able to get back
that experience that you had when you was thirty and

(10:35):
forty years old, right, Like those things that cannot be reversed.

Speaker 2 (10:42):
Yeah, And we don't talk about that enough.

Speaker 5 (10:44):
We only talk about grief and the sense of losing
a loved one.

Speaker 2 (10:48):
We don't talk about the.

Speaker 5 (10:50):
Grief of long friendship, a job, a body part, a
way of life. We don't talk about grief and those aspects.
It only comes becomes a subject and a topic of
discussion when we are more than the loss of a
loved one and it's sad.

Speaker 2 (11:10):
But that's that has.

Speaker 5 (11:13):
To change, and this is why we are doing this podcast,
so that we can actually have dialogue about grief and
the many areas that it covers and that it touches.

Speaker 3 (11:30):
I see a lot of people just they don't understand.
They really don't understand. They like that thing that they
went through to help the next person. M h, Yeah,
that thing hit me. Hit me, lat it ain't hit
me last week. I was thinking about it last week.
You know, it's been what twenty fourteen, so it's been.

Speaker 5 (12:03):
So Yeah, and it hits you a ton of bricks.
I will say that because it's a thought that you
never take a moment to realize that you are grieving
the loss of who you were, the loss of being
able to use your body in the way that you

(12:24):
were before it happened.

Speaker 2 (12:26):
And while you're in it, you don't really.

Speaker 7 (12:29):
Think about it.

Speaker 3 (12:30):
You to keep going because you gotta be strong, you
gotta you know, you can't stop, because if you stop,
you know that you may lose traction, so you keep
going because you don't want to lose what you work
hard for.

Speaker 4 (12:48):
And in whatever other people reasons may be.

Speaker 3 (12:52):
But you know a lot of us we don't think
about that, and again we push it off on the prayer.
You know, we were so easy to label what they
consider a mental illness. You know, always what's wrong with us?
Why in the case when sometimes we are going through

(13:14):
that process, like it's five stages of that process, and.

Speaker 4 (13:18):
You can keep you can keep going through it over
and over and over and.

Speaker 3 (13:22):
Over until you leave here, because you're going to these
experiences that we have. It's like we got to have
them so that we can be able to help somebody
else that go through them. Everything that we have experienced,
it's been necessary.

Speaker 4 (13:40):
It's hold us into who we are.

Speaker 7 (13:44):
Yeah, there's a purpose for everything that we go through.

Speaker 2 (13:47):
It is connected to the greater.

Speaker 7 (13:48):
Good of God's purpose.

Speaker 2 (13:50):
And while we were.

Speaker 7 (13:51):
Created and I think a lot of times.

Speaker 5 (13:53):
We get lost and thinking that our rainy days don't
have a purpose. But our rainy days are connected to
the purpose in which we were created. And so we
have to get.

Speaker 2 (14:07):
Through those things.

Speaker 5 (14:08):
And you know, the storms they're gonna come, and then
sometimes we get stuck and staying where it's raining and
storming the most because we don't see that the rain
eventually stops. If we keep moving forward, we don't have
to stay in the storm. But we don't realize that
as long as we keep going, God is going to

(14:29):
provide everything that we need.

Speaker 2 (14:31):
We just have to keep moving forward.

Speaker 5 (14:33):
And we get stuck and we're like, we're so drenched
with the weight of what we're going through that we
don't keep moving. And we have to keep moving because
everything that God puts us through, he has a reason
for it. Like I always say, everything that we have
is a puzzle piece that is going to connect to
the other things. So whatever storm somebody may be going

(14:56):
through right now, it's connected to the greater good. You
trust God, and a lot of people don't want to
trust God.

Speaker 3 (15:04):
Now.

Speaker 5 (15:05):
I have this little conversation that I had with God
the other day, and it was basically this. You know,
people will say whatever they want to say, and they
be like, well, God's not hearing from me, you know,
And I've been praying and he's.

Speaker 2 (15:20):
Just not answering my prayers.

Speaker 5 (15:21):
He's not doing what I thought he was going to do,
they said, if I talked him, Okay, yeah, but you're
not taking the time to sit and listen.

Speaker 2 (15:29):
To hear from God.

Speaker 5 (15:31):
You're wanting him to answer in a way that you've
already preconceived the answer. But God never answers us the
way that we choose for him to answer us. He
chooses to answer us in the way that he knows
is going to shape us for the purpose that he
created us. And so we get so lost in not
hearing him when he's clearly hurt us and he's answered

(15:56):
in the way that's going to mold us, in shape
us in the way that he created us.

Speaker 2 (16:01):
But we get so busy trying.

Speaker 5 (16:03):
To do his job for him that we don't hear
him or see his hand and what he has going
on for us.

Speaker 4 (16:12):
That part.

Speaker 2 (16:16):
Like I was talking to my son the other day.

Speaker 5 (16:18):
I was talking to Nate and we were talking about
death because I lost my great aunt October to twenty fifth,
and we were talking about how the only time death
is really talked about, as far as the life cycle

(16:40):
goes is when someone passes, and it's sad, but it
is part of the life cycle. Everybody has an expiration date,
and we don't know when the day nor the hour.
Only God knows the expiration day and the time limit
that He's put on us here. And so some of
us fulfill our purpose before we think that we fulfill it.

(17:05):
But God already put a timetable on what we were
supposed to do here. And even in the deaths that
we see, that's been their life expectancy of those that
God placed here. So we have to start looking at
life and death as family because they are. They go
hand in hand. You can't live life and not expect

(17:27):
death to come because it's going to touch you.

Speaker 2 (17:37):
Death is that thing that you know, it's.

Speaker 5 (17:42):
The beautiful lie that we don't we don't talk about.

Speaker 2 (17:46):
You know.

Speaker 5 (17:47):
It is part of the life cycle. It's part of
the journey. We all have an estimating time. We're all
on borrow time, and we have to give God his his.

Speaker 2 (17:59):
His due deal with on what we do.

Speaker 5 (18:02):
And if you're gonna live for God, you gotta be
willing to actually sit down and listen to what he's
telling you and don't be so arrogant and thinking that.

Speaker 2 (18:15):
You're above his instructions.

Speaker 3 (18:18):
Right right, we have to we have to be patient,
and then you gotta listen, because he said that he answered,
He answered the prayers when they come up, so as
soon as he already know, don't work it out. Just
like you said in the beginning, it is not how
we perceive it to be, how we think it's supposed

(18:39):
to be. Then sometimes we think he's not hearing us
when he's already answered the prayer for us.

Speaker 4 (18:44):
We just didn't want to receive what he gave us.

Speaker 2 (18:49):
And we get.

Speaker 5 (18:52):
Yeah, we give ourselves a preconceived answer, and that's that
goes in conversation. You know, when you're talking to somebody
about something and they come to you for advice, and
the instant you are in disagreement with something that they're saying,
they already got an attitude or whatever. And it's like
you already gave yourself the answer you were hoping to hear.

Speaker 2 (19:15):
And since you didn't hear that, now you mad at me.

Speaker 5 (19:18):
But you asked me, you know what I thought, how
I felt about the situation, and since it didn't lie
with what you said, now you got an attitude with me.

Speaker 4 (19:30):
That that's that's that's how it is.

Speaker 3 (19:35):
I tell you, this has truly been a journey. I
think we had five or shows.

Speaker 2 (19:42):
Mm hmmm. I think it was mm hmm.

Speaker 3 (19:46):
I'll tell you has been a journey just being able
to talk about, you know, those steps and the processes
and in our journey. For each one of those, I know,
shock is one of them. Denying, it's one of them
under acception. This one, it's a total fire, being angry,
angry as one and bargaining. I think it's the last one.

(20:09):
But of course it's not in order, because that's what
they can come in any order, but they have them
listed in the order. But I tell you, you may
go through acceptance first and then after after a while,
you may be shocked because hey, you you accepted it
so quick you didn't get to, you know, go through
You didn't get to feel how you needed to feel.

(20:31):
That's why I tell people it's okay to feel how
you feel. Just don't stay there too long.

Speaker 2 (20:38):
Yeah, yeah, cycles.

Speaker 5 (20:41):
You know you're gonna repeat that cycle over and over
again and over.

Speaker 3 (20:47):
It's not a storm like storms never end. We have
to understand that we just moved from them, just like
you were saying.

Speaker 4 (20:57):
When we on the road and we.

Speaker 3 (20:58):
Come upon a storm or storm come upon us, whichever
way it happens. Because You can perceive it one way,
and I can perceive it another way. You can say
we can we we ran up on the storm, or
you can say the storm, or you can say the
storm came upon us.

Speaker 4 (21:13):
Well, either way, you know, we was in a storm.

Speaker 3 (21:16):
And yeah, people, you know that there's three phases of
a storm because a storm never ends.

Speaker 4 (21:23):
Energy never dies, so storm can never end. They just
keep moving, Yeah, move from place to place to place
to place.

Speaker 3 (21:30):
The place when we don't hear aboudy because ain't nobody
living out in the sea. But that storm still going
on out there, still causing damage, still just going on.

Speaker 4 (21:42):
But never we can't starve because of a storm. You know.

Speaker 3 (21:47):
I often used to say, well, why they stopped up
under the bridge for the weighted out?

Speaker 4 (21:53):
They say, the wait it out? I say, but if
you keep going.

Speaker 3 (21:56):
I always had this thing like if if I see
a that's half half four to me, right, it's had
full to me because guess what I can I can
utilize what's in there.

Speaker 2 (22:12):
There sit Yep, It's all about this space.

Speaker 5 (22:17):
And you know one thing that I have gotten so
used to doing is like I made the post the
other day that I'm not in the position of protecting
my peace, you know, and people don't understand that, and
it's it's basically, I'm not in the in the space

(22:37):
of protecting my peace. You are in a space to
where your chaos controls you, so you can't find peace.
And so since you can't find peace, it's not my job.

Speaker 2 (22:48):
To create that for you, you know.

Speaker 5 (22:50):
And so anybody who is upset that I have found
peace and I can't give that to them. You gotta
find but your chaos is and find the peace within that.
You have to create the peace that you're searching for.
And so everybody always said, well, I'm protecting my piece,
I'm protecting my piece. Well maybe your peace should never

(23:12):
have to be protected. It's their chaos that needs to
be regulated. And when they regulate their chaos, then they
will too find peace. So you should never be trying
to control your peace are protected in any sense, because
if you are already found your piece in the midst
of your own chaos, you're never going to have to

(23:35):
protect it from anybody or anything.

Speaker 4 (23:40):
That's like that's like joy.

Speaker 2 (23:46):
Away taking away, right.

Speaker 3 (23:48):
So when when you have that type of peace, you know,
you can be mad, you can be sad, you can
be glad, you can be happy, you can be out
those different emotions and be at peace which emotion you're
experiencing at that moment, because it too share past. You

(24:09):
still can be at peace because it's not gonna last forever.

Speaker 4 (24:14):
You know what I'm saying, Yeah, exactly, And that's.

Speaker 3 (24:19):
That's that's how I guess I begin to kind of
deal with grief knowing that you know, it's okay for
me to feel this way. Just don't stay there alone, like,
don't don't be especially the negative faith that the phases
that will bring you down and the phases that would
want you to stay in a certain way, those are

(24:42):
the ones that you gotta you know, you have to
check and maybe you need an accountability to partner, somebody
that you can call and you know, check on, check
in with, you know, let them go. You know what's
going on on this phase? How am I feeling on
this pace? Why am I feeling like that? All we
need to do is just talk to somebody, yeap, And.

Speaker 2 (25:05):
You got to give yourself permission to feel that.

Speaker 5 (25:07):
And that's one thing that I can say that my son,
I swear he's been here before. He's an old soul
and when I was dealing with mom and before she
transitioned over, I came home and I guess the weight
of what I had been dealing with and watching her
and everything. And he was like, MA, just let it out.

(25:29):
And I was like, I don't necessarily know how. He
was like, you carry this so much, and you always
being so strong, even when, like even when I.

Speaker 2 (25:40):
Got sick and had my stroke, and he was so.

Speaker 5 (25:42):
Young, and he was like, even in those moments, you've
never stopped to allow yourself to feel any emotion because
you were so concerned with me, my brother, my sister
and everyone else and now Granny. And you have to
give yourself permission to feel every emotion as it comes.

(26:02):
And if you need to cry right now, a cry
and a bath form where I don't see you, or
whatever it is, you need to let that go so
that you don't you don't weigh yourself down. You gotta
express that, you gotta let it go. And so from
that moment on, I started to give myself permission to
feel the emotions as they came.

Speaker 2 (26:24):
And if I want to cry, I cried, I.

Speaker 5 (26:27):
Want to yell, I yell, if I want to do
whatever it is in that moment I do that. And
then the other thing was after my mom passed, I
didn't take the time to grieve her. I went right
back into my normal routine. And that was a huge
mistake because it cost me a couple of nights in

(26:48):
the hospital because I did not take the time to
actually and take what had just happened, you know, and
that was not a good thing, and my body actually
shut down on me, like I ended up in the
hospital for like three days. And so you have to

(27:11):
give yourself the permission to feel the emotions as they
come and have somebody that can listen and be that shoulder.
And sometimes you don't want anybody to say anything, You
just want them to hear you.

Speaker 8 (27:26):
And that listening in a way when you're dealing with
and when you're doing with and the feelings.

Speaker 2 (27:36):
That are coming up.

Speaker 5 (27:39):
Won't understand how much it helps to have somebody to
listen to what you're going through and what you're saying
and how you're feeling, because we're all.

Speaker 7 (27:51):
Going through something.

Speaker 5 (27:54):
And to have a listening ear and to give yourself
that permission.

Speaker 2 (27:58):
To feel whatever emotion is coming up.

Speaker 5 (28:02):
If it's anger, if it's frustration, if it's chaos if
it's joy happiness, because you know, identifying the triggers of
what comes with grief, because that's another thing you There's.

Speaker 7 (28:17):
A sin, there's a smell, there's a conversation, there's a
sound of song and music, the weather, all of those
things come up and it'll trigger memory, thought, feeling, and
sometimes you.

Speaker 5 (28:36):
Might try to ignore it. And then you've got those
people who try to keep themselves busy, mind, body, and
everything else so that they don't have to feel the emotion.

Speaker 7 (28:45):
But one thing about grief, it doesn't care what you've
got to do.

Speaker 5 (28:48):
It's going to find you, and when it finds you,
you go release it whether you want to or not.
Grief don't care nothing about your schedule. It don't care
nothing about you being busy, and don't care nothing about
what you got plan to do. When it catches you,

(29:11):
you're going to release those emotions. Then God forbid. It
doesn't put you into space to where you're turning to
drugs or alcohol.

Speaker 2 (29:21):
Or you know, anger in a overwhelming situation.

Speaker 5 (29:28):
But in a way that allows you a healthy release,
because grief is going to catch you no matter how
strong you think you are, and no matter how much
you think that you don't have to deal with those feelings.
It's going to catch you and you're going to have
to release it. And it's okay. It's okay to release

(29:53):
those feelings. It's okay to say today I'm not okay.
I'm grieving, you know this situation. I'm grieving this friendship
out of grieving this job that I lost. I'm grieving
the person that I was two years ago. I'm grieving
you know, my favorite pain. I can't use it no

(30:14):
more as burnout. So whatever it is, no matter how
it's significant it may seem to someone else, if it's
important to you and you need to do something to
release those feelings, do that and there's nothing wrong with doing.

Speaker 9 (30:30):
It because you're going to have those feelings and it's important,
like all of those feelings are valid, likes, those feelings
are necessary so that you can be able to express

(30:50):
to somebody else.

Speaker 3 (30:51):
You know, how did you get through that? How did
you overcome that? And share with them how they can
do it? You know, I hear you out of time
say that. You hear you hate when people say that
God will never put more on you than you can bear.

Speaker 4 (31:07):
Because that's what he will do. Because he already know everything.
You know.

Speaker 3 (31:11):
Sometimes we just have to change the way we say
stuff because the way we definitely can affect the manifestation
of the things that do happen in our lives. So
we have to be careful with but we will. We're
saying out our minds because Moufe is powerful. We really
have to stand how powerful that my feels like. We

(31:35):
have power to speak over these situations, you know, speak.

Speaker 4 (31:39):
To those things. And not only that you.

Speaker 3 (31:42):
We we now have the opportunity where we can go
he not necessarily laying on the couch, but you can
feel if you want to lay down. They got caltured,
some of them got couches. But you can go talk
to somebody. You can go and talk to a professional,
someone that has studied this, someone that you know wants
to make sure that you're okay, that you are going
through these processes, that you are able to these things,

(32:04):
because guess what, every one of them are valid, every
one of them are necessary, every one of them definitely
can help somebody else. And absolutely sometimes sometimes we may
not we might not be ready to go through it.
So we put on that stroll front because I know

(32:25):
my mom is going thirty. My mom died and she
passed in ninety one, so she went going a minute.
She been going a long time, and thirty four years,
I think.

Speaker 4 (32:39):
Thirty four years. So yeah, thirty four years because I'm
fifty now.

Speaker 3 (32:46):
And you know, not being able to truly process that
until I went through domestic violence. You know, those years
I suppressed my my feeldings and emotions by putting on
this mask, wearing this mask, by putting up this wall.

(33:06):
And the wall was I'm just gonna be rude. I'm
just gonna be angry. I'm just gonna be mad at
the world. Everybody I meet, I'm gonna just be mad
at them, just for you know, right, Grief will make
you do a lot of things, and that's going through
that that that angry phase, you know, that was the

(33:28):
angry phase. And then I didn't even understand what it
was because I knew nothing about grief, nothing about grief.

Speaker 4 (33:35):
So guess what.

Speaker 3 (33:36):
I went through that phase for a long time. I
went through that phase for most of my high school,
for most of my my my my college life, and
then it even began to transition into my workplace.

Speaker 2 (33:52):
Mm hm.

Speaker 3 (33:53):
So you know, if you don't deal with these things
and experience these things, they will come.

Speaker 4 (33:58):
Back to haunt you.

Speaker 3 (34:00):
Yeah, so we have to make sure that we are,
you know, really truly looking out for ourselves.

Speaker 4 (34:05):
You know, we want to be strong for the family.
We want to be strong for you know, the ones.

Speaker 3 (34:10):
That are close to us. But you got to be
strong for you so that you can be strong for them.

Speaker 5 (34:15):
Yeah, you can't pour from an empty cup. And that's
what people don't understand. You gotta have the overflow is
what people are supposed to get from you, so that
that's what we oftentimes miss is that you running on empty.

Speaker 2 (34:31):
And if you're running on empty, what do you think
you're caught on?

Speaker 5 (34:34):
Run on e So if you're caught on't run on
what you think your body's gonna do. It's gonna shut
down because the ain't nothing there.

Speaker 2 (34:41):
So everybody around you, if they're not pouring into you,
then you know when you need to cut those folks off.
And you have to do that to preserve yourself. Number one. Also,
if you got people.

Speaker 8 (34:55):
That are you, always have enough of overflowing.

Speaker 5 (35:03):
So that they can get that.

Speaker 7 (35:04):
And when they get.

Speaker 2 (35:05):
The overflow, you're never.

Speaker 5 (35:08):
Into I think another thing that plays a major part
into the.

Speaker 2 (35:14):
Journey of grief is forgiveness.

Speaker 5 (35:18):
Because if you can't forgive yourself, how can you forgive
somebody else. And we hold on to grudges.

Speaker 2 (35:28):
For various reasons.

Speaker 5 (35:30):
And if you're holding on to a grudge because of somebody,
that hinders you, that hinders your growth, that hinders your blessings,
that hinders a lot of things, and forgiveness, you have
to be able to forgive yourself first and stop expecting.

Speaker 7 (35:46):
People who hurts you to apologize because they don't understand
the severity of how they hurt you. Some do, some don't,
and some people may never accept accountability or apologized. And
sometimes you have to give yourself the apology that you're
expecting from someone else to yourself so that you can

(36:09):
actually grow and move beyond where they have you stuck at,
because you can stay stuck in a place of unforgiveness
and you won't move from that because you're still looking
at them through the hurt.

Speaker 2 (36:25):
That they caused.

Speaker 5 (36:27):
And when you're able to forgive them and move forward,
you're not stuck on yesterday anymore. You forgive them and
move on because they're speaking good at night, they're doing
whatever it is that they need to be hood and
you still over there being angry and bitter of what
they did and what they cause. You don't never have

(36:47):
to speak to this person again. But if you're still
holding on to the hurt, the lives or whatever, you're
hindering yourself from actually truly receiving everything that God has
for you. Doesn't mean that they have to keep you,
have to keep in contact, they have to gain access
to you again, or anything like that. But forgive those

(37:08):
people and move forward. Don't be holding on and being
angry and bitter. And I've had people ask me a
lot of time since Brad, my ex husband, and I
we are actually able to have conversations and be in
the same space and be in the same room and
all of that. And like his son, he has another

(37:30):
child outside of the three that we have together, and
people would not understand how I would allow this child
to be in my home. And I never had an
issue with the child at all, and I never really
had an issue with the new girlfriend either. It was

(37:53):
the fact of the lives that he was telling and
so people were like, well, how can you allow that child?
You just have a conversation, and I'm like, Okay, well,
hindering my growth and my relationship with God because I'm
angry at the situation. I know him for who he

(38:13):
was before everything transpired.

Speaker 2 (38:16):
We still have a friendship.

Speaker 5 (38:18):
And when I started to focus on the friendship that
we had regardless because I was imperfect with him, either,
I did my things and had to learn from that,
but I also had to forgive myself. And so when
I was able to do that, I was able to
let go of being angry and being bitter, and so

(38:39):
we are able to have a conversation. Him and my
fiance were out there having a conversation a couple of
weeks ago, and I was telling the kids about it,
and they were like, Okay, y'all are weird. But it's
not weird to me, and it's not weird to him,

(39:00):
are their dad. It's just the fact that we've grown
in a space to where that animosity is not there.

Speaker 2 (39:08):
We are adults.

Speaker 5 (39:09):
And his son has always been welcome in my home,
spending the night doing you know, he knows that I
may not.

Speaker 2 (39:19):
Have birthed him, but he's still my child.

Speaker 5 (39:22):
And when you're in this household, you're gonna do what
you're supposed to do. And you know, I've never understood
the bitter baby mama are that kind of mentality? I
just I personally could never relate to that because I've
never been that way. All I ever wanted was for

(39:43):
him to do right by his children. Now that they
are older, they are entitled to build that relationship however
they see fit. But even still, like I told my
daughter the other day that she has to forgive her
dad for or whatever she's still harboring against him, because

(40:05):
as long as she keeps holding on to what she
feels is hurt, she's never gonna have the relationship that
she wants to have with him. And she's like, but Mom,
I'm like, nah, I don't.

Speaker 2 (40:20):
I don't want to hear these excuses.

Speaker 5 (40:23):
You keep talking about how you want a better relationship
with him, but you block him from building that with him.
So it's not up to him. He's extended the olive branch.
It's up to you to actually extend it to where
you can catch it and y'all can grow together. And
I said, because you don't want it to be a
time when he's no longer here, and you wish that

(40:47):
you had said what you've wanted to say, I said,
because your daddy and I aren't getting any younger, we're
getting older, so there are more days behind us than
we have ahead of us. And if you really want
to build something with him while there is time, you
don't know how much that is, but you're going to
have to forgive him for whatever it is that you're

(41:10):
harboring against him so that y'all can build together going forward,
you know. And that was a conversation that we had
on Thanksgiving. Actually, you know, but a lot of people
don't want to forgive because they rather hold on because
it gives them a sense of control, but it really doesn't.

Speaker 2 (41:33):
You're not controlling anything. You're hindering yourself from actually feeling
and healing and growing and moving forward in.

Speaker 7 (41:44):
Loving the time.

Speaker 5 (41:44):
That you have left because you don't know how much
time you got left exactly.

Speaker 4 (41:49):
Create memories.

Speaker 5 (41:51):
Yeah, so you got to create the memories with the
time that you have and wasting time arguing, wasting time
being angry, wasting time being mad over something that is
really insignificant. And then when they're gone, you're gonna be saying, oh, well,
I wish I had well, you had time, but you

(42:12):
chose to be angry with the time that you had.

Speaker 2 (42:16):
That doesn't make sense.

Speaker 4 (42:19):
You have to definitely utilize that time. Can't just sit
there and wish and then like you say you would
have put a sugar be done. You can't get back
that time like time.

Speaker 3 (42:34):
Really, you know you you have to make the use
of these moments, So give it to the fullest. You know,
feel how you feel when you feel. But just don't
stay there too long because guess what, You're not promised.

Speaker 4 (42:48):
Tomorrow exactly get here.

Speaker 3 (42:51):
No, it never gets here, so you're never You're not
promised tomorrow.

Speaker 4 (42:55):
So give each live for the moment. If you gotta be.

Speaker 3 (43:01):
If you got to cry your way through these five minutes,
cry your way through these five minutes, because the next
five minutes, next five minutes, maybe feel with joy, maybe
feel with overwhelming happiness. It may be filled with just
different different things other than what you're feeling right now.
You got to be willing to trust the process and
then go through the process.

Speaker 4 (43:23):
So a lot of us do want to get from
point A and go straight to D. And we don't
skipp it over B and C when necessary to help
us to get to D. But we said get the D.

Speaker 3 (43:35):
We don't miss everything that we were supposed to get
in b and everything we were supposed to get in.

Speaker 2 (43:40):
C mm hmm, like you can't go.

Speaker 5 (43:43):
I always tell my kids, you can't go to the
top of the steps without hitting that first step at
the bottom. So if you want to get to the
top of the steps, you got to start at the
bottom step and work your way up.

Speaker 2 (43:55):
And will it be hard.

Speaker 5 (43:56):
Some days, Yes, it's gonna be hard some days, but
you gotta be willing to go through that. You know.

Speaker 7 (44:02):
I've been in pain since Thanksgiving and I.

Speaker 5 (44:07):
Thank God that I'm still here to feel the pain now.
Is it uncomfortable, Yes, it's very uncomfortable, but I've been
able to keep moving and going through everything because I'm
grateful that I'm still able to feel the pain here.

(44:27):
I'm annoyed by it.

Speaker 2 (44:29):
Absolutely, but.

Speaker 7 (44:32):
I wouldn't have it any.

Speaker 5 (44:33):
Other way, because if I'm not here to feel the pain,
that I know that I'm not here anymore. And so
I've learned to be okay with the pain because I'm
able to feel it. And I'm grateful because since the
year two thousand and nine, I have spent at least

(44:58):
one or two if sometimes three overnight visits in the
hospital like staying overnight, but by God's grace and his mercy,
he has kept me out of the hospital for an
overnight stay. I have not been since my mom died,
So it's been two years that I have not had

(45:18):
an overnight stay in the hospital, and that's been since
two thousand and nine.

Speaker 2 (45:24):
And I'm grateful.

Speaker 5 (45:26):
You know, it may seem small to somebody, but for me,
that's a major thing, because if you have been in
the hospital and staying overnight consistently at least one to two,
if not four times throughout a year, it's a good thing.
It's a blessing to be able to say that. And

(45:46):
it didn't dawn on me until a couple months ago
when I was sitting here and I was like, you know,
because last year I had to go to the hospital,
but I didn't have to stay. I was having issue
with my breathing and I went, but they didn't keep me.
They actually sent me home. They got my breathing under control.

(46:07):
But I now have to have the rescuing hailer for
moments of you know, flare ups with this asthma. And
I didn't have to stay overnight, and so I did
have to do several rounds of steroid injections and the

(46:28):
pretozone and all of that, and it caused me to gain.

Speaker 2 (46:31):
Quite a bit of weight, and I'm slowly working on
getting that off.

Speaker 5 (46:35):
But it's been a challenge, but it's also been a
blessing because that moment I could not breathe and it
happened suddenly, and it's like, okay, what is this. You know,
I was having a conversation with a coworker and I
instantly could not breathe, and my oxygen level had went
down to eighty two, and we thought we had it

(46:59):
under control, and it went okay for like a month
or so, and then all of a sudden, it happened
again and I ended up having to be sent home
from work. And by the time I got home, I
was like, okay, well, I'm gonna just try to lay down,
and I could not, and by the time I got
to the hospital, they were I think I may have

(47:20):
been in the waiting room maybe two minutes before they
came back there and got me, hooked me up to
the oxygen machine, gave me a breathing treatment, and for
about an hour got everything under control because my oxygen
level was going down and they still don't have a
reason as to why that happened.

Speaker 2 (47:39):
But by God, grace and mercy, I'm still here.

Speaker 4 (47:48):
Yeah, I'll tell you.

Speaker 1 (47:52):
Man.

Speaker 4 (47:56):
That's that's that's just.

Speaker 2 (47:59):
Yes.

Speaker 3 (48:00):
What I'm saying that we just have to be thankful
because our matriarch, God's willing. If she make it to January,
she'll be one hundred and one.

Speaker 2 (48:14):
Amen.

Speaker 3 (48:17):
Doctor Chan's mom just when she just had turned to
one hundred and three.

Speaker 4 (48:24):
Mm hmm, tell you.

Speaker 2 (48:30):
Wow, I don't know.

Speaker 5 (48:33):
Like my aunt said, she told us when we were younger,
she was like, she was making it to be one
hundred years old and after that she didn't want to
see anything else because she had lived her life and
because she said that her mother lived to be one
hundred and seven and her grandmother had lived to be

(48:55):
one hundred and twelve, and she was like, she didn't
want to be here that long, and she made it
till she turned one hundred. She had turned one hundred
in April of two thousand and seven, and no in
April two thousand and eight. July she passed. July the
twenty second of two thousand and eight, she passed, and

(49:20):
I was like, well, she told us that's that's as
much as she wanted to live, and God fulfilled her
wish because she said after that she wasn't nothing left
for her to see. She had done everything she needed
to do. Now that she caused a lot of hell
while she was here, of course.

Speaker 3 (49:38):
But that's what my great grandfather used to say.

Speaker 4 (49:42):
He used to tell us all the time he was
living in somebody else town.

Speaker 5 (49:49):
She said she had seen all she needed to see,
done all she needed to do, so it was time.

Speaker 2 (49:54):
For her to move on and do it somewhere else. Okay,
I won't want to.

Speaker 5 (50:00):
Be here as long as God has me here, and
I want to fulfill the purpose that He has for me.
So I want to be able to walk with intention
and walk towards the.

Speaker 2 (50:09):
Purpose and right definitely to people connected to so that
I belorify Him and everything that I do.

Speaker 4 (50:24):
That part, but yeah, I think him.

Speaker 3 (50:28):
You know, only not only do we get to, you know,
share our experiences and the things that we go through,
but you know, individuals on the other end, you know
the fact that you know they may be going through
and something that we may say may be able to
help them get through what they're going through and then
now that they know it, you know, they can share
it with somebody else, and then that's how we be

(50:51):
to heal the land. You know, start, you know, the
fact that we started, that we sacrifice that you know,
we're willing to come on here, you know, and you know,
share our experiences and share the things that we go through. No,
we're not perfect people, no professionals. We're just sharing the
things that we have experienced, what we've been through, you know,

(51:12):
some of the tips and some of the things that
we utilize, you know.

Speaker 5 (51:19):
Because we are the blue print for somebody else who's
going through something, who doesn't see the way out or
to see that there's light at the end of the tunnel.
But when they can see real people going through real
life experiences and seeing that they don't have to stay
stuck where they are, they have the power to change

(51:39):
it because there's someone else that's on the other side.
And I tell people all the time, if you see
me and you got something that you feel like, you know,
you're afraid to ask me. I'm an open book.

Speaker 2 (51:52):
You know.

Speaker 7 (51:52):
If you've got something that you feel like you need.

Speaker 8 (51:55):
To talk about, just ask because I'm not going.

Speaker 7 (51:58):
I can't be the shame what God brought me through,
because if.

Speaker 5 (52:01):
I'm ashamed of what He's brought me, then I'm ashamed
of who he is because he didn't put me through
those situations to not have something to give to somebody else,
because he put me through those situations to be able
to help somebody else. So if I'm ashamed of what
I've been through, then what do I look like hiding
it behind the scenes.

Speaker 2 (52:24):
I'm a real person.

Speaker 5 (52:25):
I've made mistakes, I've done some bad things, but those things.

Speaker 2 (52:31):
I've gone to God, talked to him about it.

Speaker 5 (52:33):
And He's put me in a place where I don't
have to be shamed for what I've gone through. Now,
you've got those other people who want to shame people
for things that they keep hidden. But if you're keeping
it hidden from somebody, then what are you actually doing? Like,
you can't be ashamed of what you've been through and
then gonna talk about somebody because they've putting it out

(52:56):
there in the front. They're not shamed of what they've
gone through because they know that God brought them to it,
so he brought them through it as well.

Speaker 4 (53:07):
Yeah, that that is so true. That is so true.

Speaker 3 (53:12):
Right, Wow, I tell you I truly have been blessed
tonight just being able to share. You know, I've felt
a little relief because I truly just being transparent. You know,
sometimes you just have to be transparent, you know, understanding

(53:33):
that you know you don't have to go through it alone,
that you have other people that you know can help
you get through it. We've all experienced stuff, so sometimes
just letting it out, you know, you know, you know,
and then just coming to grass, coming to reality, understanding, accepting,
I guess would be that phase.

Speaker 2 (53:54):
You know.

Speaker 3 (53:56):
I think I went through my incident in twenty fourteen.
It's two thousand, finity twenty twenty six in thirty one days,
and I'm like, Okay, when are you gonna let some
of this stuff go so that you can deal with
deal with it? You got you gotta learn how to
deal with it. See, we never we don't. Once we

(54:18):
go through the phases, we can't keep moving because we
were not ready to deal with it, right, you know,
went through these phases and we want sometime we just
want to keep repeating them and just keep repeating them
instead of going on trying to do something else.

Speaker 4 (54:34):
We may go back, but at least we moved on
to something else for a time period, Like get a hobby,
get something that you can do. You like the you
like to go shop, go shop, you like to go cook,
go cook, you know, Find something that you can do
that will help you take your mind out, that will

(54:56):
help you stimulate some of your your sensories so that
you won't get stuck. Yeah, some some.

Speaker 3 (55:04):
Stuff we can help along the way. We will not
be able to, you know, jump through, but we may
be able to skip some of the hurdles.

Speaker 2 (55:15):
Mm hm and reach out to somebody.

Speaker 5 (55:20):
Everybody's not judging you, and that that's one thing that
I want people to understand. Everybody's not judging you, and
the ones that are judging you are hiding, hiding themselves
because they don't want to actually admit that they too
have been in the same position. You know. I just

(55:41):
I've never understood judging someone from a space to where
like my aunt used to always tell me, you know,
just because you laughing at them today, don't make that
point to where they won't be laughing at you tomorrow because.

Speaker 2 (55:56):
You could be in that same situation.

Speaker 5 (55:59):
So be nightful before you judge someone else's situation, or
judge someone else's walk, or judge whatever they're going through
because you don't know why they only got one shoe on.

Speaker 2 (56:11):
You don't know why they lost the other shoe. You
don't know. And so since you don't know.

Speaker 5 (56:18):
Why they lost the other shoe and they only have one,
maybe that's all they needed. Or maybe they extended that
shoe to somebody else so that they can have too.

Speaker 2 (56:27):
You don't know. And don't be so quick to think that.

Speaker 5 (56:30):
You're above going through what someone else is going through.
Because when people start to say, well, it couldn't be me, okay,
tell that to God, because He's show enough to make
it you that part.

Speaker 2 (56:46):
Flip that table real quick.

Speaker 4 (56:49):
He definitely can quick fanc and her if you don't.
If you don't know the.

Speaker 3 (56:55):
Word, the word is true, that they every word, it
shall come past. He said in Proverbs twenty one and one.
The power lies in the King's hands. He can turn
them rivers of water whichever way he wants them to flow,
so he can turn your situation around. At the bleak
of a eye. You may be going through one way.
That's why I say you may be feeling one way

(57:16):
five minutes and then next minute, next five minutes, you
may be feeling a total different way, or you to
be willing to go through the process.

Speaker 4 (57:24):
You got to be willing to endure.

Speaker 3 (57:26):
You know, we gotta understand that everything work together for
He's good.

Speaker 4 (57:31):
He is, like I stand on his word.

Speaker 3 (57:34):
I believe his word because he told us, he said,
if we seek you first, the kingdom, everything should be.
So we can't. We have to understand that this, this too,
is not our home. That we wouldn't say it's gonna
have to leave here. We want one day too, it's
gonna have to, you know, get out of here. So
not only he got to you know, get through this

(57:57):
so that we can help somebody else, because those that
are coming behind us, they're gonna need to know that
they can do it because Mama did it, because grandma.

Speaker 4 (58:08):
You know what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 (58:09):
So we got to be willing to go through those
processes and learn so that we can share it with
somebody else.

Speaker 2 (58:17):
No, yeah, it's not.

Speaker 3 (58:19):
No, it don't feel good all the time. No, it's
a process. It's something that we have to go through.
And if we willing to go through it, I guarantee
you we'll be able to help not only ourselves, but
we'll be able to help somebody else.

Speaker 5 (58:36):
So yeah, it goes back to you saying and praying
and you're asking God for something and thinking that it's
going to be an easy role.

Speaker 2 (58:45):
And let's just say you on across the street.

Speaker 5 (58:49):
You may not see any traffic coming, but as soon
as you step out and now traffic starts to flow
and you got to step back, you just see that,
then it's an easy path to go straight across. But
God may take you down the road before you're able
to cross, because he's got to take you through some
things because he has put in you everything that you're

(59:12):
going to need. But you haven't dug deep enough to
figure out that you not only can't just go across
the street, you got to go down in little ways
before you can cross the street because there may be
something that he didn't see. To Qun, then he's protecting
you saying, so it wan't that Tom, How.

Speaker 2 (59:31):
Bad do you want it? Because a lot.

Speaker 5 (59:33):
Of us give up right before our breakthrough because it
gets too hard because we don't see the things that
God has protecting us from. We do have free will
and we can go and do.

Speaker 2 (59:44):
It however we want.

Speaker 1 (59:45):
To.

Speaker 2 (59:45):
But when we're.

Speaker 5 (59:46):
Off of God's plan and his path and his alarnment
for us, we get re routed, and we got to
go through some things until we get back on the
path to be obedient to what he called us to do.
Because he told us to turn right and side of
the turn left. And now we all, of course, and
so now be re routed back to where he said

(01:00:07):
for us to go in the first place.

Speaker 4 (01:00:09):
That's it, that's it.

Speaker 3 (01:00:12):
He just a GPS, and you know sometimes that GPS
has seen you round and around in a circle until
you decide to listen closely, and it will say when
they say one hundred feet, it means one hundred feet,
not two hundred feet.

Speaker 4 (01:00:31):
So you can't pass it. It's gonna take you.

Speaker 2 (01:00:34):
On down the street, and it's gonna say routing.

Speaker 4 (01:00:40):
It's gonna say re routed.

Speaker 3 (01:00:41):
And while we steady driving, and you're gonna be getting
further away.

Speaker 4 (01:00:46):
And that's that's that's that's what happens.

Speaker 3 (01:00:50):
But we were not willing to And sometime we'll we'll
get upset and we'll just stop and we'll we'll just
wait and and then sometime we'll turn around and go
back to the way we came and instead of just
waiting to see which direction he's gonna take us, because see,
he could have took us home down the street and

(01:01:11):
took us around the corner and what brought us back
to the same place that we was on our way to.
But because we wanted to do it our way, we
missed out on what could have been a blessing.

Speaker 4 (01:01:21):
We never know. We were too busy trying to rush,
were too busy trying to get from A to.

Speaker 5 (01:01:29):
D, and we got about BC yep, and just trying
to be grown and trying to be fast and not
understanding that there was something, there was a connecting path
to get there that would have eliminated a whole bunch
of headache and heartache and everything. But a lot of
people don't want to go through the slow process. They

(01:01:51):
wanted quick, fasten in a hurry. God's like, just wait,
just wait, I got something better for you if you
just wait, And then they go and rush it and
then it falls apart and it's like, Okay, well I
told you, I told you just be patient with me.
I didn't ignore you, I didn't forget about you. I

(01:02:12):
heard you the first time.

Speaker 2 (01:02:14):
Be patient. I got you just trust me.

Speaker 3 (01:02:25):
We always have to be in the midst of something.

Speaker 2 (01:02:30):
Trying to God. Don't need no help from us.

Speaker 5 (01:02:33):
He know exactly what he do we go to him for,
So you can't be going up there asking God. Okay, God,
Lisa and I pray to you two weeks ago about
this situation, and you ain't answer. So I'm gonna just
go ahead and take it upon myself to go and
do it. And God be like, Okay, since you think
you know everything, I'm gonna let you go ahead out

(01:02:53):
there and gone and do it. Just I mnsta sit
back and watch. Don't call me when you need me.
But then what we do we call on and.

Speaker 2 (01:03:05):
What we need him. But he was already there.

Speaker 5 (01:03:08):
He just lets you be stupid because he accounts for
our stupidity in the moments of indiscretion. He lets us
be stupid because he knows who he created. And sometimes
we are stubborn and hard headed and like to do
things our way, but he's always there waiting to take
us back. But we gotta be willing to go to
him first and admit that we were wrong.

Speaker 2 (01:03:30):
And a lot of us don't like to admit that
we were wrong.

Speaker 5 (01:03:33):
Even when we talk about that part, like, so we
were just don't they don't.

Speaker 4 (01:03:38):
They don't like to admit they're wrong.

Speaker 3 (01:03:40):
They don't like to ask for forgiveness, nor do they
like to give forgiveness.

Speaker 4 (01:03:44):
It's just it's just a mess, like we just.

Speaker 3 (01:03:49):
And you can't expect nobody else to be perfect, because
you know that you are not perfect exactly.

Speaker 4 (01:03:55):
But yet we.

Speaker 3 (01:03:57):
We we we do it to ourselves that free will
choices instead of listening. I tell you life will be
a whole lot easy if we just listen.

Speaker 2 (01:04:08):
Yeah, and stops want to rush through it.

Speaker 5 (01:04:11):
If you really want to live a true life of peace, abundance,
and overflow, then you trust God's timing because his timing
is always perfect for everything that we got.

Speaker 2 (01:04:23):
Going on in life, even the hard.

Speaker 5 (01:04:25):
Days, even the rainy days, All of it is connected
to the purpose in which we have been created.

Speaker 2 (01:04:32):
He didn't put us through those hard moments.

Speaker 5 (01:04:34):
He didn't put us through the loss of our loved
ones that didn't come with a lesson. Everything is connected
to our destiny. Everything is connected through our birthdate to
our death date. We don't know what that death date
is going to be, but the ones that are left
behind will know that day, and so what we do

(01:04:55):
in between that time is very important to learn to
love and appreciate one another. And if we all learn.

Speaker 8 (01:05:06):
To love Father for who we are and learn for
who you expect them to be, everything will be a
bit better place because we're not pasted. We are all
fighting to be perfect like.

Speaker 7 (01:05:21):
God, but we are not here. So we're gonna co
with fas.

Speaker 8 (01:05:25):
We're gonna come with insecurities, We're gonna come with all
of those things, and that's okay.

Speaker 2 (01:05:32):
But he the focus on God.

Speaker 5 (01:05:36):
And bringing forth his word and his his agenda.

Speaker 8 (01:05:42):
Right that point, because walking with God, it's not an
evil walk, but it's worth it.

Speaker 4 (01:05:57):
It is if you just will do a little work.
It's not even that hard.

Speaker 3 (01:06:03):
Like we have so many choices and we can do
so much, Like we can choose to stay in denial.

Speaker 4 (01:06:10):
Or we can choose to work do it.

Speaker 3 (01:06:15):
But I tell you, uh, sometimes I just I've come
to really get into the word a little more. Understanding
the word a little more has been able to help
me with the denial part. Like I did experience song
with my brother, like I didn't want to accept it.

(01:06:36):
I guess it just not even that I was denying it.
I didn't want to accept it. I didn't want to
believe that it happened, but I had to understand, you know.

Speaker 5 (01:06:53):
Like my family has been grieving since twenty two and
that started with my younger cousin he had a heart attack.
Then my mom passed in twenty three, and they both
passed in June. He passed June the twenty sixth of
twenty two. She passed June the fifteenth of twenty three.

(01:07:17):
My uncle passed August to twenty sixth of last year,
and my aunt passed August.

Speaker 2 (01:07:23):
To twenty October to twenty fifth of this year.

Speaker 5 (01:07:26):
So we've been in a constant state of grief and
it's not easy, you know, to go through that in
the sense of what do you even have time to
find joy.

Speaker 2 (01:07:47):
In the moments?

Speaker 5 (01:07:48):
Some people would ask, But if you know each one
of the individuals and you had a relationship with them,
and you find joy in in the memories that you
created and the stories that you share about them, And
that's one of the things that I can say that.

Speaker 2 (01:08:10):
Even still, you know, I have.

Speaker 5 (01:08:13):
My moments of sadness because they're no longer here, but
I find myself in memory of the joys and the
memories that we created, because we had a lot of
funny stories and we had a lot of funny situations,
and so those are the things that I remember the most.
So it's very rare for me personally that I have

(01:08:37):
the moments of just sadness. You know, I can say
that the sadness that I feel for a relative that
passed it is mostly for my great grandfather. I have
more moments of sadness with him when I think about him,
because that was the first death that I ever experienced

(01:09:03):
with somebody that was close to me, and I was
only eight years old, and that was tough for me
because my granddaddy was my best friend.

Speaker 4 (01:09:16):
You know.

Speaker 5 (01:09:17):
It was me and my granddaddy and I couldn't do
no wrong in his eyes, and honey, any and everything
that I wanted I got, you know. And to not
have that male figure anymore, I think that's what brings
the sadness song.

Speaker 2 (01:09:35):
For me more than anything. And so I still longed.

Speaker 5 (01:09:40):
For him because I feel like he was taking way
too early for my liking.

Speaker 2 (01:09:47):
But I've also come.

Speaker 5 (01:09:48):
To understand that his time here was up and God
needed him back.

Speaker 4 (01:09:55):
Right, I tell you, this season has definitely been a journey.

Speaker 3 (01:10:03):
I lost a couple of family members this year, but
I tell you, being able to have this space and
being in this space and you know, having those that
have been apart, like Schaneera, Shanette, Dana, I mean, it's

(01:10:26):
just been amazing. Dan Yello, her name is Dan Yello,
Dan Yello. It's just been an amazing journey. And I think
we had Apostle Kimberly, uh huh, just able to share,
like say, different perspectives in their individual journeys.

Speaker 4 (01:10:46):
You know, some have lost children. Yeah, you know, you know,
it just came in all different forms.

Speaker 3 (01:10:58):
And then just realizing, you know that there were so
many different forms outside of physical.

Speaker 4 (01:11:04):
Loss and learning how to.

Speaker 3 (01:11:07):
Get through those different processes and dealing with those different
processes because each one you you you deal different, but
the fact that you know, everybody have an experience and
you have something to draw on that you're not alone.
Something else that we was able to do through this
season was matters of the Heart. I think we had

(01:11:29):
three we had uh we just had an opportunity to
really share and really be in different spaces and you know,
allowing people to be able to see us in different
different forms, different gears, different lights, because you know, because

(01:11:54):
we are humans and because we deal with stuff just
like everybody else. We put our pants on the same,
but our skirts are on the same, our sweater, our hats,
our teeth the same.

Speaker 4 (01:12:05):
You know, we are human.

Speaker 5 (01:12:07):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:12:07):
Here, it's everything that you guys experience.

Speaker 3 (01:12:11):
You know, when people start seeing you in different lights,
they think different of you, but understand that we are
the same person.

Speaker 4 (01:12:18):
We don't change, We just elevate.

Speaker 3 (01:12:21):
We know one things that you know us, but before
we start doing those things, they are the same. Well,
we just learned that, you know, God deal with the heart,
and we have to be in a space that we
are healed, that we're willing to heal, that we are empowered,

(01:12:43):
and not only are we empowered, but we're ready to
empower others. We're ready to align with that that He's
already purposed for us.

Speaker 4 (01:12:53):
If we read our word.

Speaker 3 (01:12:54):
He tells us so many times, in so many different
directions and so many different instructions, that that all we
got to do is align. You know, He see what
we're gonna go through. That that that's where that word
resilience come from. He know what we're gonna deal with

(01:13:15):
and then understanding that we are gonna go through those things,
but that we don't have to deal with trauma no more.
We can allow those things to be released. So I
tell people, God deal with me with words he break down,
normal everyday words that you know we may throw around

(01:13:37):
and truly not understand what that what He's really trying
to tell us. Because when I tell you, I grass
hope to that word life.

Speaker 4 (01:13:47):
And truly gotta understanding of that word life.

Speaker 3 (01:13:49):
Like people, I'm telling you, if you think you living,
when was the last time you loved someone that you
didn't know? When did you love your brother and your sister,
Not your rest tip brother and sister, but a stranger
brother in sisteh. When did you inspire somebody Not because
they were your family or they were in your circle,

(01:14:12):
but because I came in contact with them and you
wanted to see them take their rightful place. You wanted
to see them grow, You want to see them doing
something other than what they was doing. The last time
you allowed the fear of God to come forth and
not put it on the back burner and not pretend

(01:14:32):
like it don't exist.

Speaker 5 (01:14:35):
Yeah, the matter to the heart was one of those
things where like it brought me out of my comfort zone.

Speaker 2 (01:14:45):
I will say that in a way that I never
thought I would be especial.

Speaker 5 (01:14:52):
When you first asked me to host it, I was like, yeah, okay,
but I have no idea what that entails or anything.
And this year has been a year of getting out

(01:15:14):
of my own shadow in a sense, because it went
from not one, not two, but three of Matters of
the Heart and then into me doing my first book
sign in a book event in general for myself in
honor of my mom. That was something I never imagined

(01:15:35):
myself doing, and so God already knew. He also knew
who to put me with to push me out of
my own shadow. And it's been a it's been a journey,
but I'm grateful for each and every moment, and even

(01:15:55):
in the situations where you know, we might have a
guest who's unable to fulfill their assignment for being on
the show and then having to either cancel, do a rerun,
or or whatever, but learning to actually still show up regardless.
And that's been one of the things that it has

(01:16:18):
taught me this year is it's going Life is unpredictable,
but either you can run and hide from a situation
that you are forced to step in front of, or
you can you can actually stand in the spotlight, right.

Speaker 3 (01:16:44):
And I think I rather stand in the spotlight to
see what the end is gonna be, because if I stop,
I may not get to see what it's gonna be exactly.

Speaker 5 (01:16:58):
It may not even be as bad as you may
have thought it was gonna be. Because you know, one
thing that I have learned also over this journey is
pay attention to the small, little I'm joking kind of things,
or I didn't mean it that way. I did, baby,
I only got one time to hear somebody say something

(01:17:20):
like that, and I got nothing else to say to them.
You know, It's like, I don't want you playing no
seeds of doubt over in my space, in my garden,
So I don't need to talk to you. Because small
minded individuals keep people stuck in spaces where they're not
supposed to be because they can't see beyond anything greater
for themselves. And so I've learned to limit those interactions,

(01:17:44):
not to say that they're not worthy, but at the
same time, if you're not willing to see beyond what
you already hold yourself in the space and you don't
want to see nobody else move from where you are,
then I don't need to talk to you at that point,

(01:18:05):
because you're going to keep me thinking that I'm less
staning when God keeps showing me that I'm greater than
what I ever imagine. I just got to trust him
through the process. But you keep telling me that no,
you don't see that. Well, it's not for you to see.
And everybody's not gonna be your assignment either, And I'm
learning to understand that too, because you can spend your

(01:18:28):
lifetime trying to pour into somebody, and the more you're
trying to pour into them, they don't want to receive anything.
They're not soaking up anything that you're giving them, but
you're completely being drained because you keep trying to pour
into them and they don't want to take it.

Speaker 2 (01:18:47):
You gotta let them people go too.

Speaker 4 (01:18:51):
Yeah, sometimes it may hurt, but is necessary. So we
just sometimes we just got to take it for what
it is. He'll never lead you wrong, no, because he
already know what it is. He already know what is.
We just got.

Speaker 5 (01:19:13):
And I have conversation with my baby sister not too
won because she called me well first she had sent
me a text message or somebody sending her something, and
I couldn't I couldn't even get mad at the text
message number one because I couldn't understand it, and that
the girl seemed like she was trying to cust my

(01:19:33):
sister out or whatever. But I couldn't read the message
because it had so many errors in it that I
just started laughing. So my sister called me and she
was like, I'm ready to go over there and turn up.
I'm ready to do this. And I said, okay, so
you ready to go to jail for something that I

(01:19:54):
can't even She was like, well, I'm trying to see
if I should be mad.

Speaker 2 (01:19:57):
I said, well, baby, first off, I can't.

Speaker 5 (01:19:59):
Be mad because they can't even cuss you out right,
I said.

Speaker 7 (01:20:04):
So if you can't even understand what they said, what
you're mad for? I said, because I would be white
the people with the red hen trying to send it
back to him. I said, because if you don't cuss
me out, baby, I need to at least know you're
cussing me out so that I can actually be mad
at that.

Speaker 2 (01:20:23):
But if I can't understand.

Speaker 7 (01:20:25):
It, there's no reason for me to be mad, So.

Speaker 5 (01:20:31):
Why don't, he said, Why do you make everything out
to be a joke? I said, for number one, like
I have told you several times, I'm at peace. So
you want me to be upset over something that somebody said,
I said, but you sent me this. I can't get
mad at it because I can't understand it, I said.

(01:20:52):
And if I can't understand it they're trying to cuss
me out, then.

Speaker 7 (01:20:56):
They don't be mad by themselves. I said. So now
you can too, to crash out over that or wear
me out. You won't either have to deal with the
consequences whether you crashing out. Now, what comes with you
crashing out is jail time, loss of your job, loss
of your income, loss.

Speaker 5 (01:21:16):
Of everything that you've gained in the so called small
amount of time of peace that you've had. Now, if
you want to give that up, then by all means,
go crash out, do what you need to do. But me,
on the other end, I find this very comical because
I can't get mad at somebody.

Speaker 2 (01:21:36):
Who can't even complete a sentence. So it's up to
you because.

Speaker 5 (01:21:43):
You're like, see, this is why I figured I needed
to call you before I really crashed out.

Speaker 7 (01:21:49):
She said, because you just you just brought me all.

Speaker 2 (01:21:51):
The way down.

Speaker 7 (01:21:52):
I said, I wasn't necessarily trying to break you down,
but I'm just saying, you give an energy to something
that doesn't need your energy.

Speaker 5 (01:22:00):
Because if the person can't complete a sentence that says
that they're.

Speaker 2 (01:22:04):
Mad, then it is what it is. I said.

Speaker 5 (01:22:08):
I had a lady one time call me on the
phone getting mad at me.

Speaker 2 (01:22:13):
Because of something.

Speaker 5 (01:22:14):
And she was like, well, I'm gonna show up at
your job and I'm gonna mess up your car. I said, well, baby,
I'm gonna go ahead and tell you obviously you don't
know much about me, because my car is already messed
up and the only thing you can do is fix it.

Speaker 3 (01:22:26):
And she.

Speaker 2 (01:22:29):
I said, She was like, you think this is a game.

Speaker 5 (01:22:31):
You think this is a jump. I said, baby, let
me tell you. If you know my car, you know
my my driver side window don't roll down. It's got
a big den in the back. The other window on
the passenger side it don't roll down either.

Speaker 2 (01:22:44):
So the only thing you really can.

Speaker 5 (01:22:45):
Do, and it needs a paint job also, I said,
So the only thing you can.

Speaker 2 (01:22:49):
Do to my car is fix it.

Speaker 5 (01:22:51):
It's not gonna hurt me because it's already beat up
and damaged, so you you're not gonna do anything but
fix it.

Speaker 7 (01:22:59):
And so the woman got so mad at me to
shut up on me.

Speaker 5 (01:23:02):
And I'm what you want me to be mad, but
I can't be mad, so you be mad at me.

Speaker 4 (01:23:11):
Forever.

Speaker 8 (01:23:14):
I'm not doing this energy.

Speaker 2 (01:23:19):
But that's what you have to do.

Speaker 5 (01:23:20):
You have to be able to decipher what gets your
energy and how you want people to take it away
from you. And if you know what your triggers are,
you know what it's going to make you upset and
what's not. But if you give people the power over
you to get you upset, then you are already an
lost because you're not in control of yourself exactly.

Speaker 3 (01:23:44):
That's why it's important for us to have these panels
where we can talk and and share these things because
a lot of us we don't we really don't have
nobody to you know, give us their perspective so we
see that that whit sided that's coming out our eyes,
That that that what we want to see and open

(01:24:05):
half close. Yeah, because some of us we ain't reached
that point yet, you.

Speaker 4 (01:24:10):
Know what I'm saying. So yeah, and then some of us.

Speaker 3 (01:24:14):
Will listen, we'll we'll, we'll say we're taking it in,
but as soon as we get out of sight, we're
back to whatever it was we were thinking before we
even come and had that conversation. It's like, why do
we even have that conversation? Just wasting my time going
over something that you know you wouldn't ready.

Speaker 5 (01:24:29):
For exactly like, either you want me to listen to you,
and I'm quick now to say, Okay, do you want
a solution to the problem that you're about to tell
me or do you just need me to listen, because
if you call me for a solution, I'm about to
give you one. But if you just want me to
listen and not offer no solution, then just say that.

(01:24:51):
But say that in the beginning because if I start
giving you solutions and you come up with, well, I.

Speaker 2 (01:24:56):
Don't know if I want to do that, then don't
call me because I'm gonna give your solution.

Speaker 4 (01:25:01):
I know that's right, I know that's right. I tell
you what I tell you this year is so it flew.

Speaker 3 (01:25:07):
By yah thirty one days and it's a rap, it
is a rat. So I tell you I have enjoyed
this space. I have enjoyed, you know, being a part
of the Grief podcast where we could share, you know,
our perspective and then having the conference. I'm grateful that

(01:25:29):
you accepted the role as hosts because you know, like Shaneia, Shaneera,
we've been on this.

Speaker 4 (01:25:38):
Pray car for five years.

Speaker 3 (01:25:39):
When she first came home, she said, I really don't
know how to pray, she said, but I'm willing to
come and learn. We we have what we call this
the L three movement. It stands for learn, Love, Lead.

Speaker 4 (01:25:52):
Is to learn.

Speaker 3 (01:25:53):
Pam is the love and I am the lead, and
we all have you know, we all had to go
through the different phrases because we all went through a
process where we had to learn, Like I had to
learn how to really run that line and you know,
invite people to be a part and you know, to
do different things to learn about intercession because I really

(01:26:17):
didn't know nothing about no intercessory prayer.

Speaker 4 (01:26:19):
I just knew how to pray for myself.

Speaker 3 (01:26:21):
And you know just what I did in private, never
know that I would own a prayer line. Yet hosting
a prayer line and inviting other people and getting other
people to come be apart. But we getting ready to
go into our sixth year, and I'm just excited about
that that we could just have a space where we

(01:26:41):
can share and be ourselves and you know, allow God
to do what he said he would do for us,
because we didn't get dropped out of this guy. You know,
we were all strategically placed here to do something and
to leave a mark for the next generation that's gonna
come because you know, our world make end, but their

(01:27:02):
world that there's there's gonna be another world after us.
There's always gonna be life in in this universe, in
this in this earth, there's always gonna be life because
guess what it's like, we got the same Bible. The
Bible ain't never changed, It's not gonna change. It's gonna
continue to repeat them cycles. It's gonna be the storm

(01:27:25):
keeps going. Yeah, we gotta understand that we just leave.
But oftentimes we say that that person being here before. Yeah,
we all been here before. We just not meant we're
not built to remember it. Because that's how he designed it.
Because if if if what they say is true, then

(01:27:48):
guess what if energy just keep going and going and going,
and guess what, it just has to go into another person.

Speaker 4 (01:27:55):
He just has to go to another person. It has
to go into another form of a person, even if
we have to start over as an infant.

Speaker 3 (01:28:03):
Yeah, I mean that's that's that's the perception I see.
Somebody else may perceive it to be different, But hey,
I'm sticking to my I'm sticking to what I have.

Speaker 4 (01:28:12):
Learned, right, you know what I'm saying.

Speaker 3 (01:28:18):
But I'm just grateful for the space. Hopefully we will
be back next season.

Speaker 4 (01:28:25):
In some form.

Speaker 3 (01:28:29):
I'm definitely that that is something that I Am going
to be praying about and working on while we have
a break to see how we can you know, still incorporate.

Speaker 4 (01:28:43):
Incorporate this space.

Speaker 5 (01:28:45):
Yeah, because I think this is a good outlet for
people to know that they're not alone in the grieving
process and the grief and darned because I don't you
don't only hear it talked about, but we do often
see a lot of rest in peace, you know. You

(01:29:06):
see that, just like you see the congratulations of a
new baby being born.

Speaker 7 (01:29:13):
But we don't talk about.

Speaker 2 (01:29:15):
The process in between, you know, but is a process.

Speaker 3 (01:29:23):
But again, I thank you for you know, accepting the challenge,
you know, and being a part of the podcast as well.

Speaker 4 (01:29:35):
As the conference.

Speaker 3 (01:29:38):
You know, none of them would have been possible without
all of individuals that you know, took time to be
apart again.

Speaker 4 (01:29:48):
I hope that we will be able to come.

Speaker 3 (01:29:50):
Back in some form in twenty twenty six, season four
of the Couppie Cast.

Speaker 4 (01:30:00):
I'm excited about that.

Speaker 3 (01:30:03):
And we got some things that we're gonna be doing
outside of the podcast. We got a couple of hosts
that you know, stepping outside of their box doing some
different things, expanding their reaching their brand and just excite
it to see what God is doing. We're definitely gonna
have an opportunity, so y'all make sure y'all tune in

(01:30:24):
the thirty first. That is our last show other years
for all of the hosts. So all of the hosts
that you guys have been supporting throughout this year, we're
all gonna be in one space. We're gonna exchange doing
a gift exchange, something that we started last year. It's

(01:30:47):
gonna be something that we'll do until we can't do
it no more. But just opportunity to exchange gifts and
to show each other some love and to get ready
to prepare for our new season. We get We get
thirty one days out, we get a month off, the

(01:31:08):
entire month of January. We get off that we can
you know, truly reflect and get prepared for a new season,
get prepared for what's to come, and you know, and
enjoy the time that we have off. So y'all, I'm
excited about twenty twenty six.

Speaker 2 (01:31:31):
Me too.

Speaker 3 (01:31:33):
I just can't wait to see, you know how God moves.
I'm ready, ready and willing, you know, a man.

Speaker 4 (01:31:45):
Ready and willen.

Speaker 3 (01:31:46):
So again, I want to thank you for coming on
tonight because we've been on here just yapping, yep and
yap and yep and yep. Yeah, but we just wanted
to be in this space, you know, we just wanted
to let you guys know that we have appreciated being
able to, you know, come on and share and do

(01:32:09):
this this season. So I'm gonna let Tarda tell you
guys how to follow and support her where you can
catch her up some of the things that she's doing
and all of that great.

Speaker 4 (01:32:20):
Stuff before we close out.

Speaker 5 (01:32:23):
All right, Well, if you're looking to write a book
and you need help and assistance with that, you can
find me at my business. Believe in Lord Jesus, I'm
putting them all together WANs of Transformation Publishing. You can
find me on Facebook, you can find me on Instagram
it's Wings of Transformation Publishing. Or you can just look

(01:32:45):
for Treeda Harris. Anything that has butterflies. I'm pretty much
surrounded by. You can find me on TikTok at Tarita Harris.
You can find me on YouTube Tarita unders Score Harris
seventy eight.

Speaker 2 (01:33:03):
I am the host of Believe in the Journey podcast.

Speaker 5 (01:33:06):
I also have a Wings of Transformation group. If you
want to join the Believe in the Journey podcast group,
just let me know. It should be public. I'm not
sure if it's private or not, but just let me
know if you want to be a part of that.
But you can find me on TikTok I'm not hard
to find. It's just Trevita Harrison. If you have trouble

(01:33:27):
trying to remember my name, I always tell people if
you can save Elbita, you can say Trevita is cheesy,
but it works and it helps you to remember who
I am. But I help people who are wanting to
write a book. If you feel like you don't know
where to start, the first thing I always say is
just start writing, everything else will fall into place. And

(01:33:50):
if you need guidance through that process, I am here
to help you through that because I started my journey
as a self published author.

Speaker 2 (01:33:58):
So I want everybody who has.

Speaker 5 (01:34:00):
Story, because we all have a story, and your story
is a blueprint for somebody else to get through whatever
it is that they're going through.

Speaker 2 (01:34:08):
So I look forward.

Speaker 5 (01:34:10):
To helping you bring your vision to reality.

Speaker 2 (01:34:14):
A ma'am.

Speaker 3 (01:34:16):
Heymen, So I tell you we have a group of
talented individuals over here. For those that don't know who
I am, I am the visionary behind the podcast and
the magazine I stand on. We are the change that
we desire to see in this world. That that is

(01:34:37):
our motto. Change begins and end with us. So I
am doing everything that I can. I have written, co author,
self published, whatever however you want to name it. I've
done books, journals, anthology, poetry books, activity books, journals, planners, calendars,

(01:35:03):
whatever I have Over now, I think we're at one
hundred and sixty five publications. Most of my publications are
available on Amazon, Blurb, Walmart, dot com, any place that
you can buy a e book or a printed book,

(01:35:26):
you can pretty much find some of my stuff. I'm
even in some of your locals.

Speaker 4 (01:35:33):
But just want to be a voice. I don't want
nobody telling my story.

Speaker 3 (01:35:38):
I will leave my story so that people will have
an opportunity to explore me. Each each literary work that
you pick up by me shares a part of my journey,
shares a part of me. So I really love what
I do. I just want to see individuals living life

(01:36:04):
and how do we do that. Love inspire, having the
fear of God, educating power and encourage.

Speaker 4 (01:36:10):
That's how you live life. You just don't exist.

Speaker 3 (01:36:14):
So I want to see more of you out there
living life, enjoying life. If you want to connect with me,
I am a master of many hats. I care a
couple of degrees, I am certified in a couple of things.
But most importantly, I just want you to know that
you matter, that you have purpose, that you did not
get jopped out of the sky, that you were strategically

(01:36:36):
placed here to do just what you're doing. You may
not be doing what you want to do right now,
but know that you are right where you're supposed to be.
And if you keep going, if you keep pressing, if
you keep standing, you'll get through. If you want to
follow and support the things that I do. You can,
of course go over to my website, which is Angela
Thomas smithbooks dot com. Again that is waw w you

(01:37:00):
Angela Thomas smith books dot com have most of everything
that I am connected to over there on that website. Also,
if you want to check me out and see where
all the links and all the things that you can
see me at, hear me at, watch me at, whatever

(01:37:20):
you want to call it, you can go over to Linktree,
queen u Collaborations. Most everything is queen up Collaborations. I
say you can google me, I'll pop up. You can
find out some.

Speaker 4 (01:37:33):
Things about me. Now they got that AI AI tell you.

Speaker 5 (01:37:37):
A whole too, and that's that's crazy.

Speaker 2 (01:37:43):
I googled myself not too long ago. I was like, Lord,
look at that.

Speaker 4 (01:37:47):
Yeah, you got to do is google because that thing
is good at reading.

Speaker 3 (01:37:52):
So everything that anybody has put in there about you,
anything that anybody said about you, it is definitely in there.
I'm talking about that thing was telling me some up
that I didn't even know that people knew. I was like, yeah,
I said, thank you. I tell you we got to

(01:38:15):
learn how to make the best of every opportunity to
enjoy life because you only get one chance at it.
Somebody didn't get to see this day, but we did.
So it's important that we get right those things that
we didn't get right on yesterday and be an impact.
You know, there's two things that we can do. You
can get something that you did not get right on

(01:38:36):
yesterday right today. And you can be in somebody's life
because you never know when you may be that only
Jesus that come in contact with them. So always be
the best version of yourself. I love y'all. I appreciate
y'all for stopping by and sharing this space with us.
For the times that you have stopped by.

Speaker 4 (01:38:57):
Know that we will be back. We will be back season.

Speaker 3 (01:39:01):
We would definitely start advertising probably in January, letting you
guys know when the shows will be airing, because again
we only come on the fifth Sundays of every month
that there is a fifth Sunday.

Speaker 4 (01:39:16):
Of course, you know that.

Speaker 3 (01:39:17):
Every Sunday every month, don't have a fifth Sunday. So
I think that maybe four or five in twenty twenty
six we will get them out to you.

Speaker 4 (01:39:26):
Guys. Don't know who will be returning next year, but
you know We're gonna make it do what it does.

Speaker 3 (01:39:32):
I'm gonna be here, Teda is gonna be here, so
we're gonna make it happen. We may recruit some more people,
but however it go, y'all, we in the building. We
want to be that change that we desire to see.
So guess what I'm gonna keep showing up and guess
what he gonna keep showing out.

Speaker 4 (01:39:49):
That's all I can say.

Speaker 2 (01:39:51):
Amen.

Speaker 4 (01:39:53):
I hope you guys have a great night. Again.

Speaker 3 (01:39:57):
We have definitely appreciated being here with you guys. But
before we go, because this is definitely a support panel,
I want Charda to pray us out, to pray over
the people as we close out and give thanks again.

(01:40:17):
Thank you guys for allowing us this space to read
it all right.

Speaker 5 (01:40:22):
Dear Heavenly Father, thank you for bringing us together in
this space, giving us an opportunity to simply say thank you.
Because without you, we are nothing, and everything that we
do is for you. We glorify your name and everything
that we do, everything that we say, everything that.

Speaker 2 (01:40:38):
We touch is because of you.

Speaker 5 (01:40:41):
Let the words that we have said here tonight be
a healing map for someone who is going through who
did not know how to go through this grieving journey
and let them know that they are not alone because
everything that you have given us, you have given to
them as well. So we thank you, we honor you,
and we will continue to do the works that you

(01:41:02):
have put us on assignment to do because each time
that we use our voice, we bring them closer to you,
because we know that if we are connected to you,
they are connected to you. So continue to guide our
steps and god our voices to be the sounding board
for you and everything that you do, because you are

(01:41:23):
the one that gets all the glory and all the
credit for everything that we do, because you gave us
the vision and you provided everything that we needed, and
you continue to bring people closer to us so that
they can get closer to you. So continue to lead
us and continue to honor us in everything that we do.
We praise your name and Jesus Name.

Speaker 2 (01:41:43):
We pray Amen, Amen, Amen, Amen.

Speaker 4 (01:41:47):
Again.

Speaker 3 (01:41:48):
I thank you guys for joining us on tonight, and
we will see y'all next season.

Speaker 2 (01:41:56):
Way a

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