August 8, 2025 • 29 mins
https://www.solgoodmedia.com - Listen to hundreds of audiobooks, thousands of short stories, and ambient sounds all ad free! Dive into "Daily Our Miss Brooks," where each podcast episode brings you a slice of life from the iconic radio character, Miss Brooks. Experience her daily escapades in teaching, alongside lively interactions with students and faculty, all infused with the wit and charm that made the original series a hit. Whether you're a longtime fan or new to the series, this podcast is your go-to for a daily laugh rooted in classic entertainment.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
I'm olid Soap, your beauty Hope and bluster Cream shampoo
for soft, glamorous, caressible hair. Bring you Our Miss Brooks
starring Eve Arden.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Our Miss Brooks.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Teaches English at Madison High School, and like most other teachers,
she tries to stay on the best of terms with
her principal, mister Osgood Conklin.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
This isn't always easy, you see, mister Conklin has high
blood pressure, and it's wise to take him with a
grain of salt. Of course, it's wiser not to take
him at all. Anyway, On Thursday he gave me a
little honorary assignment to take care of on my own time,
which consisted of a report he had to submit to
the school board. I was to rephrase, punctuate, and proof
(00:51):
read the twenty five pages by morning, and sure enough
I got it all done by morning. In fact, when
missus Davis my left awaken me, I had been sleeping
like a baby for over twenty minutes.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
I'm small, sat dear, what's the trouble? Nightmare?
Speaker 3 (01:08):
No day, mayre. I was up all night with some
extra work. Mister Conklin gave me, Oh.
Speaker 5 (01:13):
Well, I guess you can use the extra money that
goes with it.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
Money? What money?
Speaker 5 (01:18):
Surely there must be some compensation for working away from
the school.
Speaker 3 (01:22):
Oh there is, Missus Davis, the satisfaction of a job
well done, the thrill of helping my colleagues in their
time of need, and the gratification that comes with the
knowledge that I've assisted my superior officer on the battlefield
of life. Do you know something else, Missus Davis, What honey,
the next time I work at home, it'll cost him
a fini.
Speaker 5 (01:43):
Remember this, dear, Money won't fie back your health and
good looks once they've gone. If I were you, i'd
flatly refuse to do any extra work at all.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
But I can't do that, mister Conkline's my principle that doesn't.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
Give him the license to make a beast of burden
out of you. Why for two cents, i'd advise you
to quit.
Speaker 3 (02:01):
And if I had two cents, i'd take your advisor,
Missus Davis, even a beast of burden has to earn
oat money.
Speaker 5 (02:09):
Well, hurry with your shower, Connie, I've got a nice
breakfast all plan for you.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
Oh, I won't have time for breakfast today, Missus Davis.
Walter Denton's taking me to school in his car so
I can get this report to mister Conklin.
Speaker 5 (02:20):
What's the matter with your car, Khannie?
Speaker 3 (02:22):
I had a little trouble with the steering wheel. What
kind of trouble it came off? It's nice of you
to give me this lip today, Walter, and I'd like
to compliment you on your promptness too. You were right
on time.
Speaker 4 (02:40):
I'll punch you Altis in Mania with mi. Miss Brooks
decides if I was nine, time you let some other
kid pick you up? Like I always say, the early
bird catches the worm.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
Well, like I always say to the other worms, let's
get the men and go fishing.
Speaker 4 (03:01):
Confidentially, Miss Brooks, you look like you could use a
little help. You seemed bushed. Frankly, I think you're work happy,
Miss Brooks, work happy?
Speaker 3 (03:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (03:10):
What did you do last night after you got home
from school?
Speaker 3 (03:13):
I worked on a report for mister Conklin.
Speaker 4 (03:15):
Aha, I knew it. Mister Conklin shouldn't give you extra
things to do.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Why don't you tell him about it?
Speaker 2 (03:20):
Walter?
Speaker 4 (03:21):
I'm not kidding, Miss Brooks. If you let him, mister
Conklin will make a beast of burden out of you
get I put your foot down.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
I may put all four of them down.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
What I've been reading in the papers that there's quite
a shortage of good teachers. You don't have to chowkow
to anybody.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
I don't have to what Walter twcow.
Speaker 4 (03:39):
It's Chinese slang for polishing the apple.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
Well, Walder, I don't chow kout to mister Conklin. It's
just that he's my principal.
Speaker 4 (03:48):
Excuse me, miss Brooks, but he's only your principal at
school after hours.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
He's just before I quote.
Speaker 4 (03:55):
When I'm going to quote, I'd like to make a
prior statement.
Speaker 3 (03:57):
Proceed.
Speaker 4 (03:58):
Well, any remark I make now is merely something I
overheard in my daily contact with other members of the
student body and does not necessarily reflect the opinion of
the repeating eavesdropper.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
Well, repeat away eavesdropper.
Speaker 4 (04:11):
I've heard sundry other pupils refer to mister Conklin as it.
Like I said, Miss Brooks, this isn't necessarily my opinion
of him.
Speaker 3 (04:20):
You've made that very clear, Walter.
Speaker 4 (04:21):
It good. Some of the kids have spoken of mister
Conklin as after all, I go to his daughter Harriet.
You know, yes, I know it might not be the
right thing to do to talk about my father in law.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
Walter, you're not married yet, that's right too.
Speaker 4 (04:37):
Well, I've heard him called it.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Gee.
Speaker 4 (04:40):
I wouldn't want Harriet to know.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
About this, my lift, I feel, Walter, I'll go on.
Speaker 4 (04:45):
Okay, now, mister Conklin, in the eyes of some of
the undergraduates at this high school, is nothing but it. Gosh,
if I was Harriet's father and he was gonna marry Harriet,
no one want him to go repeating things about me.
Then again, he'd probably be the first one to it.
Sure he would. So I'll tell tell tell a Jenia
cafeteria called mister Conklin a big inflated bag of ego there,
(05:09):
I said it.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Give that boy a new nash and a pair of
pajamas to drive it in.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
You will ever mention my mentioning this, William miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
Oh, of course not, Walder. I wouldn't even want anyone
to hear me thinking it. Mister Conklin may be rather
a disciplinarian, but he does have quite a job on
his hands too. Running a high school these days is
difficult work. Now, just between you and me, Walter, Yes,
how would you go about deflating a big bag of ego?
Speaker 4 (05:39):
Well, the first thing I'd do is not let him
think I was afraid of my job. I'd walk in
with whatever work I'd done for him last night, throw
it on his desk, and say, there he are. That's
the last work I do outside of my regular school duties.
Take it or leave it, Buster.
Speaker 3 (05:57):
Now, that sounds like sterling advice, Walder. But there's just
one thing I'd like to ask you. If Buster decides
to leave it. Yeah, where's the nearest local of the
Beasts of Burden Union?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Now?
Speaker 1 (06:18):
Then, Harriet, I want the furniture in this office to
be absolutely glistening. But daw Harriet Conan, when your father
and principal asks you to polish something, grab a dust rag, girl.
Because mister Jason Brill, the principle of Clay City High School,
is paying me a visit. You know how sarcastic and
(06:39):
critical he can be.
Speaker 4 (06:40):
But why is he coming to Madison.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
Well I'm not positive, Harriet, but I think the old
pirate is here to raid one of my teachers.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
It's a deplorable practice.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
But he stole a Spanish teacher right from under the
nose of Colton's principle.
Speaker 6 (06:52):
But Danny, didn't you get our new math teacher, mister
Paine away from clay City.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
That Harriet is just a rumor. The pain came to
Madison of his own free will.
Speaker 6 (07:03):
You mean he joined our faculty before you gave him
your own study and home to sleep in, and promised
him your car whenever he wanted it, and told him
about having all his meals with us free of charge,
and two movies a week.
Speaker 2 (07:13):
Thrown in, considered the subject closed.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
Now that Brill thinks he can sneak in here like
a thief in the knife, I'm.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
It.
Speaker 2 (07:24):
Just call me kettle. I'm the kettle.
Speaker 7 (07:26):
It was being called black by that pot over there.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
I'll see here, Brill, I won't oh, excuse me. That
will be all Harry.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Yes day, goodbye Brill, goodbye Harrie. Poor girl. What do
you mean, poor girl?
Speaker 7 (07:42):
If you've come here to get my goat, I'm the contrary.
Good it's not a goat, I'm after. It's an English teacher.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
I've got my eye on an English teacher.
Speaker 7 (07:51):
This is war Oz, good course, my frontier perche.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
I don't know what you're talking about.
Speaker 7 (08:02):
I'm talking about mister Paine, A good, if flighty math teacher.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Okay, you've got pain, but I'm.
Speaker 7 (08:08):
Going to get the best English teacher at medicine, Miss
Constance Brooks.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Miss Brooks, of what made you pick her up? I'm
attracted to her syntax, very.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
Interesting, brill but an altogether impossible task. Why should Miss
Brooks want to work for any other principle when she's
used to the benevolent, tender, warm hearted guidance of a
person like myself.
Speaker 7 (08:31):
That's one of the things I'm depending on. Another one
is a secret weapon, os Good. You'll find out all
about it when it's too late.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Secret weapon. What secret weapon? It's a secret os Good.
But believe me, it's going to work. Jason, you're being
absolutely childish.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
There isn't the remotest possibility of Miss Brooks making any
such ridiculous change as you suggest.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
There isn't that, No, there is he look os Good.
I don't want to be an old I told you so.
Speaker 7 (08:56):
But that's just what they said right before Jack Benny
switched to see.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Come in.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
There you are, mister Consta. That's the last work I
do outside of my regular duties.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
That's it. Take it or leave it, Buster, I mean, they've.
Speaker 2 (09:22):
Gotten to it.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
Come here, miss Brooks, sit down by my desk if
you please.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Oh but I've got a class soon.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Mister Wait, you've been working too hard lately, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (09:34):
I have, that is sure, I have.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
I don't like it. You hear I don't like it?
One vet, you don't, we hear it. Madison don't want
our teachers to overwork.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
After all, you're an educator, a person of intellects and perception,
not a beast of burden.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Look about you, miss Brooks.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
The walls of this office, that picture hanging the of
Madison's first principle, Yoda Critch.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Was.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
There's more to a school than the people in it.
There's tradition, a tradition of loyalty in industry, good fellowship
and cooperation, but mostly loyalty.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
Why when I think of our school's hung it brings
a lump to my throat. Oh, madicine, thum medicine.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
I love the air, thou er thou mad um manson.
Miss Brooks, Come with me to the window, these hallowed walls,
this lovely ivy covered exterior. Do you know the significance
(10:52):
of this venerable and beloved ivy.
Speaker 3 (10:54):
Miss Brooks, I know I don't mister Canton.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Here I raise the window.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
Who he let me help you?
Speaker 1 (11:10):
It's caught in that scumming ivy.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
There we are.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
Look, miss Brooks, look at this beautiful campus as far
as the eye can see, green grass. Now, there's one
thing I want you to do before you do anything else.
Speaker 3 (11:31):
No, what, no, I won't do it.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Won't do what.
Speaker 1 (11:37):
I absolutely refuse to mow that lawn.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
By nave Arden.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
You will continue in just a moment. But first, here
is Verne Smith. The makers of Pomolosap are getting away
one hundred thousand dollars in prizes first prize forty nine
dollars plus over forty nine hundred other cash prizes in
the big forty nine gold Rush contest. Hundreds will strike
it rich in this exciting gold Rush contest. One of
them may be you. It's easy to enter. Just finish
(12:12):
the sentence in twenty five additional words or less. I
like palmalip soap because that's all. Just twenty five words
or less to finish the sentence. I like palmalid soap
because then mail your entry right away along with a
Pomalid soap rapper. Try for your share of that one
hundred thousand dollars in prizes right now. Your chance of
winning forty nine thousand dollars is as good as anyone's.
(12:34):
Get entry blank with complete rules from your dealer, or
write your completed sentence on plain paper. Include your name
in the dress and dealer's name in the dress. Mail
with one Pomalid soap rapper for each entry to gold
Rush Contest Box forty nine, New York, eight, New York.
You better write that down. Gold Rush Contest Box forty nine,
New York, eight, New York. Enter as often as you like,
(12:56):
including one rapper with each entry, but hurry. The contest
poses a week from next Saturday. Mail your entry right away.
Get palm leaves hope right away to help win a
lovelier complexion, and try for your share of the one
hundred thousand dollars in cash prizes.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Well, mister Conglin not only canceled all extracurricular work for me,
but as we stood by the window looking across the campus,
he actually bent over backwards to be courteous and sweet.
Of course, he didn't bend over quite far enough but
it was a surprise to see him acting so human.
Although I couldn't understand the reason for this unaccustomed solicitude,
(13:38):
I didn't let it spoil my appetite. When lunch period arrived,
I was in the school cafeteria with our bashful biologist,
mister Philip Boynton. Here we are you sit right down,
miss Crooks. Oh thanks, have you got everything? Modesty forbids
a direct answer. All you mean on my tray, all
(14:00):
said mister Boynton.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Oh good. How do you like what they're serving in
the cafeteria these days? With Brooks?
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Well, it'll never replace food, But it isn't what you
eat in the place that's important anyway. It's with whom,
what's with whom? With whom you eat with whom? Or
as I once heard another English teacher say, what's with you?
Speaker 2 (14:22):
You're teasing me again with Brooks. But I'm getting kind
of used to it. I catch on much faster album
I used to. Don't you think?
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Oh, yes, you're really gone, mister Boynton.
Speaker 2 (14:31):
And that's what I finished my meat was. That's another
one of those colloquial expressions, isn't it gone? I wonder
what the derivation actually is how is simple expression like
the past tense of gold could assume the connotation with
which it's currently associated. It seems totally incomprehensible at first glance.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
Feature meat balls, mister Boyton, before they get warm again.
Speaker 4 (14:53):
Brooks, Mister Boynton.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Well it's Harriet concl Hello, Harriet.
Speaker 6 (14:57):
Daddy wants to see you in his office right away,
mister Boyton.
Speaker 3 (14:59):
If you don't, and if he does mine, oh please,
miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Mister councklean wouldn't summon me during my lunch period unless
it was something important.
Speaker 3 (15:05):
I think it is.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
Daddy sounded very urgent.
Speaker 3 (15:08):
Maybe some of that ivy crawled into his office. You
haven't forgotten our date this afternoon, mister Barton.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Oh no, I'll call for you after school and take
you to the zoo. See you at free Miss Brooks,
all right, mister Barton.
Speaker 6 (15:20):
Mister Boynton isn't always as romantic as you'd like him
to be, as he Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
No, Harriet, not always, or ever for that matter.
Speaker 4 (15:28):
Maybe it's just as well.
Speaker 6 (15:30):
You know how Daddy feels about faculty members fraternizing. Not
that I think Daddy's right. Sometimes Daddy can be pretty harsh.
What's then, if Daddy wasn't Daddy, what would he be?
Speaker 3 (15:41):
Mammy? I don't know, Harriet.
Speaker 6 (15:46):
I'm going up to the steam table and get some lunch.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
Miss Brooks, can I bring you anything? No? Thanks? Run along, Harriet, okay.
Speaker 6 (15:51):
Miss Brooks, Poor miss Brooks. She chases after mister Boynton,
just like Waterdetton runs after me.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
I beg your pardon. What's mister Brown?
Speaker 8 (16:03):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (16:03):
Hello, Harriet.
Speaker 7 (16:05):
This is mister Hastings, Harvey. This is ours good Conklin's daughter, Harriet.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
How do you do, my dear?
Speaker 3 (16:12):
So?
Speaker 9 (16:12):
It's a pleasure to meet a member of medicine's undergraduate buddy,
especially such a charming and lovely one as yourself.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
Why thank you, mister.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Kelly.
Speaker 2 (16:25):
Mister Hastings and I were just talking. Harry.
Speaker 7 (16:27):
It will excuse you if you want to get to
the steam table.
Speaker 6 (16:30):
Huh oh yes, mister Brown.
Speaker 3 (16:34):
Will I see you again, mister Hastings.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
No, I would consider that a very fortuitous circumstance. Indeed, Harry,
you would golly.
Speaker 7 (16:42):
If I can't come back, you'd better not walk backwards, Harry.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
And a she did is marvelous.
Speaker 7 (16:58):
You've got something that may make women drop whatever they're doing.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
And concentrate on you. Oh, I don't know, mister Brill.
I just try to be pleasant to everyone. Well, you
keep it up.
Speaker 7 (17:07):
We'll have Connie Brooks in our English department in no time.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
And now, look, this is a good chance for you
to meet her.
Speaker 7 (17:13):
She's seated at that table over by the wall and
she's alone. It don't tell her too much right now,
but make an appointment for tea.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Then we'll really go to work on her.
Speaker 9 (17:21):
Well, if you say so, mister Brill. But it does
seem like a kind of dirty trick. Will teacher so
hard to get nowadays?
Speaker 7 (17:27):
I think secret weapons, don't think they act. Now there's
miss Brooks Hastings.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
Sicker, yes, sir, and when I bring it back and
place hurt your feet, I expect the whole case of
strong high.
Speaker 9 (17:47):
I beg your pardon, Miss Brooks. But may I introduce
myself right?
Speaker 3 (17:50):
Yes? I suppose. Well I'm Constance Brooks.
Speaker 9 (17:56):
Yes I know my name is Hastings. Hastings. Are these
chairs occupied?
Speaker 3 (18:02):
Just the one I'm sitting in? I mean, help yourself, please.
Speaker 2 (18:06):
Thank you.
Speaker 9 (18:07):
I'm not going to be in town very long, Miss Brooks,
and I have to move rapidly, so may I take
you home after school.
Speaker 3 (18:14):
That's a little too rapidly. Just who are you, mister Hastings.
Speaker 9 (18:19):
Well, I'm I'm a sort of a friend of a
friend of mister he Has.
Speaker 2 (18:25):
I dropped over to day with mister Brill.
Speaker 3 (18:27):
Oh, the principle of play City High. What are you
doing here slumming?
Speaker 2 (18:33):
That must be the famous Brooks wit I've heard so
much about.
Speaker 3 (18:40):
You can stop now I have.
Speaker 9 (18:45):
Seriously, Miss Brooks, I think that your undergraduate body is wonderful.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
Mister Hastings.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
The kids, the kids, great bunch.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
Your faculty is nice too, Yes, I'll have them all.
Speaker 9 (19:04):
Miss Brooks's There's one thing I just can't understand. How
does a youthful, intelligent, lovely looking person like yourself happen
to be lunching alone?
Speaker 3 (19:15):
I beg your pardon?
Speaker 2 (19:16):
Didn't you hear what I said? Miss Brooks?
Speaker 3 (19:18):
You lost me after youthful?
Speaker 9 (19:24):
Really, I just can't figure it out all by yourself
in this big cafeteria.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Oh, thing like this could never happen at Clay.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
City, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 9 (19:36):
I'm writing a book on the teaching of English and
high schools, and I'd certainly like to include an interview
with Madison's outstanding authority on the subject an interview.
Speaker 3 (19:47):
Well, I did have a date this afternoon.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
Shall we say tea for two at four?
Speaker 10 (19:53):
Well?
Speaker 3 (19:53):
I guess so. But there's something I can't help thinking.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
Oh what's that? Miss Brooks?
Speaker 3 (19:58):
T for two at four? Will me zoo for one
at three?
Speaker 2 (20:09):
And that's why I've summoned you to my office.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
Mister Boughton. Jason Brill and his secret weapon must be stopped.
You've got to make miss Brooks stay on at Madison.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
But why me, mister Conklin. You know how timid I am.
Got to get over it. Boy, you like Miss Brooks,
don't you? Oh? Yes, sir, But what about your stand
on fatternization. I've reversed it as of now.
Speaker 1 (20:28):
Look, Quyton, all you have to do is act the
way you really feel, or Betty yet the way you've
seen other people act.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
What do you mean, mister Conklor. Well, you've seen leading
men on the screen, haven't you.
Speaker 1 (20:39):
Humphrey bo got him knock on any door, Errol Flynn
and Don Juan.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
No, sir, I haven't seen those. Oh well, what's the
last movie you did see? The last movie I saw
is called I Believe it was called Arrowsmith. I don't
go to movies much, mister Conklin. You see, I'm more
of a radio fan. I listen to those mystery programs,
a lot of mystery programs.
Speaker 10 (20:59):
Right.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Well, that's just as good.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
According to my wife and daughter, those private detective fellows
are as attractive as any of the movies does.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Now, why don't you act like one of them when
miss Brooks comes around me? Act like a private eye.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
Certainly from what I hear, most of them merely sit
behind a desk until some beautiful girl comes in. Then
they open the drawer, take a big drink, and then
they say, come on, babe, we're going on a caper.
Speaker 2 (21:23):
Whatever that is.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
Well, I won't take over an answer, Boydan, you've got
to do it with mister conk for Madison, boy tell
me that you'll try. Boyton, it's all ass I'll try.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
Come in.
Speaker 3 (21:49):
Oh it's me, mister Boyton. I'm glad I caught you
before you left school for the day. I won't be
able to go to the zoo with you this afternoon.
Mister Boyton, did you hear what I said? What are
you doing at that desk?
Speaker 2 (22:11):
Parked the frame? Baby, stashing right there. I watched the
Caper Sweetheart with Caper. Look, I know the opposition is
trying to put the heist on certain persons. Persons, but
we've got a few angles too. They can't get away
(22:31):
with it. See now we've got them covered like a
bubble dancer in Boston. See and that comes right from
mister bigg See.
Speaker 3 (22:39):
Thank you, Edward g. Robins.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
You've got to stay here, Miss Books. You can't leave, Matterson.
I don't know what their secret weapon is with you?
Just a minute?
Speaker 3 (22:48):
Who are we now, Buck Rogers?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
No, No, it's me, mister Poynton. That was just distilled water.
I drank. I don't know what mister Brill's planning, but
don't then.
Speaker 7 (22:58):
Perhaps i'd better explain it. My said, Well, then you'll
excuse us. I know the door was open. I believe
you've met mister Hastings.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
Miss Brooks, Oh, yes, I have.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
This is mister Boyton, mister Hasty. How do you do Hello.
We've got to get.
Speaker 7 (23:10):
Back to play City a little earlier than i'd plan,
Miss Brooks, so I'm afraid your interview will have to
be postponed.
Speaker 9 (23:15):
However, I'm sure that we can take up just where
we left off, and we are all together in clay
City and Clay City.
Speaker 7 (23:21):
Yes, as you know, a good teacher is always in
the man, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (23:26):
Teacher snatcher? What does he hold you? Miss Brooks, don't
listen to him, don't listen to anybody.
Speaker 3 (23:31):
Well, that isn't hard. Nobody's saying anything. He is all
this anyway.
Speaker 7 (23:35):
Mister Hastings here is head of the English department at
Clay City, Miss.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
Brook and he's your secret weapon. Well, if you want
to put it that way. Actually I'm a very simple man.
Speaker 3 (23:45):
Yes, you are in a jet propelled sort of way.
Speaker 2 (23:49):
I'll see here, Bill, I won't have you can't do it.
I'll have you all stopped puffing os. Good, you've come
to a station.
Speaker 7 (23:58):
What do you say, Miss Brooks, would you like to
transfer to Clay City transfer?
Speaker 3 (24:02):
Well, come to think of it, I have been overworking lately.
I might consider a transfer of that.
Speaker 2 (24:07):
Oh you can't, Miss Brooks. Oh why can't she? Have
you got some extra chores she can do without pay?
Speaker 3 (24:12):
How about it, mister Conklin, any more extra work?
Speaker 2 (24:15):
No, Miss Brooks, none at all. It's very pleasant at play, Citty,
Miss Brooks, say you'll come say you won't. Which is it,
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Well, it's quite a problem. But now I'd like to
ask a question, mister Brill, if I were a biology teacher,
would you want me to come to Clay City.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
A biology teacher? Well, frankly, no, there's no opening for
a biology teacher.
Speaker 3 (24:34):
That's all I wanted to know. Good day, gentlemen, I'm
remaining at Madison.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
Well we tried, Come on by, Miss Brooks, are good
for you, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Oh Madison lo.
Speaker 3 (24:51):
As old as Tommas and.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
Basketball short to day?
Speaker 3 (25:04):
How short the pay.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
We've been and manson we will still be there? Had man.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
Hello play today.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
E mardon of arms.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Brooks returns in just a moment.
Speaker 10 (25:41):
But first, dream Girl, dream Girl Beautiful luster Cream.
Speaker 8 (25:49):
Tonight show him how much lovelier your hair can look
after a luster cream shampoo. Only luster Cream brings you
came too. Its magic formula blend of secret and greets
plus gentle Lanolin gives loveliness, lather even in hardest water,
glamorizes your hair as you wash it. Luster Cream not
(26:09):
a soap, not a liquid, but a dainty cream shampoo
leave's hair fragrantly clean, free of loose dandriff, glistening with sheen, soft, manageable,
gives new beauty to all hairdoos or permanence four ounce jar,
one dollar smaller sizes either tubes or jars. Tonight try
Luster Cream shampoo and be a.
Speaker 10 (26:32):
Dream girl, dream girl, beautiful Luster cream girl. You your
crowning glory to.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
A Luster cream shampoo. And now once again, here is
our Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (26:53):
Well, mister Conklin finally left us all alone in mister
Boynan's laboratory.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
O Gars, Miss Brooks, if sure had me worried.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
Were you? I'm really afraid i'd leave. Mister Boynton.
Speaker 2 (27:02):
Sure, I couldn't even talk. I was so nervous.
Speaker 3 (27:04):
You didn't get much of a chance. But now that
we're alone, mister Boynton, is there anything else you want
to say to me?
Speaker 2 (27:11):
Yes, Miss Brooks, there is. What if we don't hurry,
we'll be late for the zoo? Where are you going,
Miss Brooks? What are you doing at my dest.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Park? The frame? Baby? You're in for the caper of
your life.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
Next week?
Speaker 1 (27:39):
Clinging to another our Miss Brooks, Joe brought to you
by Palma y Colt, your beauty Hawk and Luster Cream Shampoo,
for soft, glamorous, caressible hair our. Miss Brooks starring Eve Arden,
is produced by Larry Burns, written and directed by Al Lewis,
with music by wilbra Hatch. Mister Boynton is played by
Jeff Chandler, Mister Conklin by Gail Gordon others in the
Night's Cast where James Morgan, Dick Cranna, Gloria McMillan, Gerald
(28:02):
Moore and Frank Nelson.
Speaker 11 (28:09):
Men, do you shave with a lather or brushless shaved cream?
Pomalid shaving cream comes both ways, and whichever way you
prefer to shave, you'll find that using either Pomolid brushless
or Pomlive laver shaving cream can bring you more comfortable,
actually smoother shaves.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
Here's the proof.
Speaker 11 (28:26):
Twenty five hundred and forty eight men tried the new
Pomolive waiter shave described on the tube, and no matter
how they had shaved before, three out of every four
got more comfortable, actually smoother shaves. Get Pomalive brushless or Pomlive.
Speaker 2 (28:40):
Lather shaving cream today.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Or mystery liberally sprinkled with laughs. Listen to Mister and
Missus North the exciting, fun packed adventures of an amateur
detective and his beautiful white Tune in Tuesday evenings over
most of these same stations and be with us again
next week at the same time, or another other comedy
episode of our Miss Brooks vab Lemon speaking.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
Stay tuned now.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
For Life with Luigi, which follows immediately over most of
these same stations.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
This is CBS. We're ninety nine millions together.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
Everything they've drawn to a podcasting
I'm olid Soap, your beauty Hope and bluster Cream shampoo
for soft, glamorous, caressible hair. Bring you Our Miss Brooks
starring Eve Arden.
Speaker 2 (00:20):
Our Miss Brooks.
Speaker 1 (00:21):
Teaches English at Madison High School, and like most other teachers,
she tries to stay on the best of terms with
her principal, mister Osgood Conklin.
Speaker 3 (00:29):
This isn't always easy, you see, mister Conklin has high
blood pressure, and it's wise to take him with a
grain of salt. Of course, it's wiser not to take
him at all. Anyway, On Thursday he gave me a
little honorary assignment to take care of on my own time,
which consisted of a report he had to submit to
the school board. I was to rephrase, punctuate, and proof
(00:51):
read the twenty five pages by morning, and sure enough
I got it all done by morning. In fact, when
missus Davis my left awaken me, I had been sleeping
like a baby for over twenty minutes.
Speaker 4 (01:04):
I'm small, sat dear, what's the trouble? Nightmare?
Speaker 3 (01:08):
No day, mayre. I was up all night with some
extra work. Mister Conklin gave me, Oh.
Speaker 5 (01:13):
Well, I guess you can use the extra money that
goes with it.
Speaker 3 (01:16):
Money? What money?
Speaker 5 (01:18):
Surely there must be some compensation for working away from
the school.
Speaker 3 (01:22):
Oh there is, Missus Davis, the satisfaction of a job
well done, the thrill of helping my colleagues in their
time of need, and the gratification that comes with the
knowledge that I've assisted my superior officer on the battlefield
of life. Do you know something else, Missus Davis, What honey,
the next time I work at home, it'll cost him
a fini.
Speaker 5 (01:43):
Remember this, dear, Money won't fie back your health and
good looks once they've gone. If I were you, i'd
flatly refuse to do any extra work at all.
Speaker 3 (01:53):
But I can't do that, mister Conkline's my principle that doesn't.
Speaker 5 (01:55):
Give him the license to make a beast of burden
out of you. Why for two cents, i'd advise you
to quit.
Speaker 3 (02:01):
And if I had two cents, i'd take your advisor,
Missus Davis, even a beast of burden has to earn
oat money.
Speaker 5 (02:09):
Well, hurry with your shower, Connie, I've got a nice
breakfast all plan for you.
Speaker 3 (02:13):
Oh, I won't have time for breakfast today, Missus Davis.
Walter Denton's taking me to school in his car so
I can get this report to mister Conklin.
Speaker 5 (02:20):
What's the matter with your car, Khannie?
Speaker 3 (02:22):
I had a little trouble with the steering wheel. What
kind of trouble it came off? It's nice of you
to give me this lip today, Walter, and I'd like
to compliment you on your promptness too. You were right
on time.
Speaker 4 (02:40):
I'll punch you Altis in Mania with mi. Miss Brooks
decides if I was nine, time you let some other
kid pick you up? Like I always say, the early
bird catches the worm.
Speaker 3 (02:53):
Well, like I always say to the other worms, let's
get the men and go fishing.
Speaker 4 (03:01):
Confidentially, Miss Brooks, you look like you could use a
little help. You seemed bushed. Frankly, I think you're work happy,
Miss Brooks, work happy?
Speaker 3 (03:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (03:10):
What did you do last night after you got home
from school?
Speaker 3 (03:13):
I worked on a report for mister Conklin.
Speaker 4 (03:15):
Aha, I knew it. Mister Conklin shouldn't give you extra
things to do.
Speaker 3 (03:19):
Why don't you tell him about it?
Speaker 2 (03:20):
Walter?
Speaker 4 (03:21):
I'm not kidding, Miss Brooks. If you let him, mister
Conklin will make a beast of burden out of you
get I put your foot down.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
I may put all four of them down.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
What I've been reading in the papers that there's quite
a shortage of good teachers. You don't have to chowkow
to anybody.
Speaker 3 (03:36):
I don't have to what Walter twcow.
Speaker 4 (03:39):
It's Chinese slang for polishing the apple.
Speaker 3 (03:44):
Well, Walder, I don't chow kout to mister Conklin. It's
just that he's my principal.
Speaker 4 (03:48):
Excuse me, miss Brooks, but he's only your principal at
school after hours.
Speaker 3 (03:52):
He's just before I quote.
Speaker 4 (03:55):
When I'm going to quote, I'd like to make a
prior statement.
Speaker 3 (03:57):
Proceed.
Speaker 4 (03:58):
Well, any remark I make now is merely something I
overheard in my daily contact with other members of the
student body and does not necessarily reflect the opinion of
the repeating eavesdropper.
Speaker 3 (04:09):
Well, repeat away eavesdropper.
Speaker 4 (04:11):
I've heard sundry other pupils refer to mister Conklin as it.
Like I said, Miss Brooks, this isn't necessarily my opinion
of him.
Speaker 3 (04:20):
You've made that very clear, Walter.
Speaker 4 (04:21):
It good. Some of the kids have spoken of mister
Conklin as after all, I go to his daughter Harriet.
You know, yes, I know it might not be the
right thing to do to talk about my father in law.
Speaker 3 (04:34):
Walter, you're not married yet, that's right too.
Speaker 4 (04:37):
Well, I've heard him called it.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Gee.
Speaker 4 (04:40):
I wouldn't want Harriet to know.
Speaker 3 (04:41):
About this, my lift, I feel, Walter, I'll go on.
Speaker 4 (04:45):
Okay, now, mister Conklin, in the eyes of some of
the undergraduates at this high school, is nothing but it. Gosh,
if I was Harriet's father and he was gonna marry Harriet,
no one want him to go repeating things about me.
Then again, he'd probably be the first one to it.
Sure he would. So I'll tell tell tell a Jenia
cafeteria called mister Conklin a big inflated bag of ego there,
(05:09):
I said it.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
Give that boy a new nash and a pair of
pajamas to drive it in.
Speaker 4 (05:18):
You will ever mention my mentioning this, William miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
Oh, of course not, Walder. I wouldn't even want anyone
to hear me thinking it. Mister Conklin may be rather
a disciplinarian, but he does have quite a job on
his hands too. Running a high school these days is
difficult work. Now, just between you and me, Walter, Yes,
how would you go about deflating a big bag of ego?
Speaker 4 (05:39):
Well, the first thing I'd do is not let him
think I was afraid of my job. I'd walk in
with whatever work I'd done for him last night, throw
it on his desk, and say, there he are. That's
the last work I do outside of my regular school duties.
Take it or leave it, Buster.
Speaker 3 (05:57):
Now, that sounds like sterling advice, Walder. But there's just
one thing I'd like to ask you. If Buster decides
to leave it. Yeah, where's the nearest local of the
Beasts of Burden Union?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Now?
Speaker 1 (06:18):
Then, Harriet, I want the furniture in this office to
be absolutely glistening. But daw Harriet Conan, when your father
and principal asks you to polish something, grab a dust rag, girl.
Because mister Jason Brill, the principle of Clay City High School,
is paying me a visit. You know how sarcastic and
(06:39):
critical he can be.
Speaker 4 (06:40):
But why is he coming to Madison.
Speaker 1 (06:42):
Well I'm not positive, Harriet, but I think the old
pirate is here to raid one of my teachers.
Speaker 2 (06:46):
It's a deplorable practice.
Speaker 1 (06:48):
But he stole a Spanish teacher right from under the
nose of Colton's principle.
Speaker 6 (06:52):
But Danny, didn't you get our new math teacher, mister
Paine away from clay City.
Speaker 1 (06:56):
That Harriet is just a rumor. The pain came to
Madison of his own free will.
Speaker 6 (07:03):
You mean he joined our faculty before you gave him
your own study and home to sleep in, and promised
him your car whenever he wanted it, and told him
about having all his meals with us free of charge,
and two movies a week.
Speaker 2 (07:13):
Thrown in, considered the subject closed.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
Now that Brill thinks he can sneak in here like
a thief in the knife, I'm.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
It.
Speaker 2 (07:24):
Just call me kettle. I'm the kettle.
Speaker 7 (07:26):
It was being called black by that pot over there.
Speaker 1 (07:31):
I'll see here, Brill, I won't oh, excuse me. That
will be all Harry.
Speaker 2 (07:35):
Yes day, goodbye Brill, goodbye Harrie. Poor girl. What do
you mean, poor girl?
Speaker 7 (07:42):
If you've come here to get my goat, I'm the contrary.
Good it's not a goat, I'm after. It's an English teacher.
Speaker 2 (07:49):
I've got my eye on an English teacher.
Speaker 7 (07:51):
This is war Oz, good course, my frontier perche.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
I don't know what you're talking about.
Speaker 7 (08:02):
I'm talking about mister Paine, A good, if flighty math teacher.
Speaker 2 (08:06):
Okay, you've got pain, but I'm.
Speaker 7 (08:08):
Going to get the best English teacher at medicine, Miss
Constance Brooks.
Speaker 2 (08:11):
Miss Brooks, of what made you pick her up? I'm
attracted to her syntax, very.
Speaker 1 (08:19):
Interesting, brill but an altogether impossible task. Why should Miss
Brooks want to work for any other principle when she's
used to the benevolent, tender, warm hearted guidance of a
person like myself.
Speaker 7 (08:31):
That's one of the things I'm depending on. Another one
is a secret weapon, os Good. You'll find out all
about it when it's too late.
Speaker 2 (08:39):
Secret weapon. What secret weapon? It's a secret os Good.
But believe me, it's going to work. Jason, you're being
absolutely childish.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
There isn't the remotest possibility of Miss Brooks making any
such ridiculous change as you suggest.
Speaker 2 (08:51):
There isn't that, No, there is he look os Good.
I don't want to be an old I told you so.
Speaker 7 (08:56):
But that's just what they said right before Jack Benny
switched to see.
Speaker 2 (09:07):
Come in.
Speaker 3 (09:09):
There you are, mister Consta. That's the last work I
do outside of my regular duties.
Speaker 2 (09:15):
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
That's it. Take it or leave it, Buster, I mean, they've.
Speaker 2 (09:22):
Gotten to it.
Speaker 1 (09:25):
Come here, miss Brooks, sit down by my desk if
you please.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Oh but I've got a class soon.
Speaker 2 (09:30):
Mister Wait, you've been working too hard lately, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (09:34):
I have, that is sure, I have.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
I don't like it. You hear I don't like it?
One vet, you don't, we hear it. Madison don't want
our teachers to overwork.
Speaker 1 (09:45):
After all, you're an educator, a person of intellects and perception,
not a beast of burden.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Look about you, miss Brooks.
Speaker 1 (09:56):
The walls of this office, that picture hanging the of
Madison's first principle, Yoda Critch.
Speaker 2 (10:08):
Was.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
There's more to a school than the people in it.
There's tradition, a tradition of loyalty in industry, good fellowship
and cooperation, but mostly loyalty.
Speaker 2 (10:21):
Why when I think of our school's hung it brings
a lump to my throat. Oh, madicine, thum medicine.
Speaker 1 (10:30):
I love the air, thou er thou mad um manson.
Miss Brooks, Come with me to the window, these hallowed walls,
this lovely ivy covered exterior. Do you know the significance
(10:52):
of this venerable and beloved ivy.
Speaker 3 (10:54):
Miss Brooks, I know I don't mister Canton.
Speaker 2 (10:56):
Here I raise the window.
Speaker 3 (10:59):
Who he let me help you?
Speaker 1 (11:10):
It's caught in that scumming ivy.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
There we are.
Speaker 1 (11:20):
Look, miss Brooks, look at this beautiful campus as far
as the eye can see, green grass. Now, there's one
thing I want you to do before you do anything else.
Speaker 3 (11:31):
No, what, no, I won't do it.
Speaker 2 (11:36):
Won't do what.
Speaker 1 (11:37):
I absolutely refuse to mow that lawn.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
By nave Arden.
Speaker 1 (11:50):
You will continue in just a moment. But first, here
is Verne Smith. The makers of Pomolosap are getting away
one hundred thousand dollars in prizes first prize forty nine
dollars plus over forty nine hundred other cash prizes in
the big forty nine gold Rush contest. Hundreds will strike
it rich in this exciting gold Rush contest. One of
them may be you. It's easy to enter. Just finish
(12:12):
the sentence in twenty five additional words or less. I
like palmalip soap because that's all. Just twenty five words
or less to finish the sentence. I like palmalid soap
because then mail your entry right away along with a
Pomalid soap rapper. Try for your share of that one
hundred thousand dollars in prizes right now. Your chance of
winning forty nine thousand dollars is as good as anyone's.
(12:34):
Get entry blank with complete rules from your dealer, or
write your completed sentence on plain paper. Include your name
in the dress and dealer's name in the dress. Mail
with one Pomalid soap rapper for each entry to gold
Rush Contest Box forty nine, New York, eight, New York.
You better write that down. Gold Rush Contest Box forty nine,
New York, eight, New York. Enter as often as you like,
(12:56):
including one rapper with each entry, but hurry. The contest
poses a week from next Saturday. Mail your entry right away.
Get palm leaves hope right away to help win a
lovelier complexion, and try for your share of the one
hundred thousand dollars in cash prizes.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Well, mister Conglin not only canceled all extracurricular work for me,
but as we stood by the window looking across the campus,
he actually bent over backwards to be courteous and sweet.
Of course, he didn't bend over quite far enough but
it was a surprise to see him acting so human.
Although I couldn't understand the reason for this unaccustomed solicitude,
(13:38):
I didn't let it spoil my appetite. When lunch period arrived,
I was in the school cafeteria with our bashful biologist,
mister Philip Boynton. Here we are you sit right down,
miss Crooks. Oh thanks, have you got everything? Modesty forbids
a direct answer. All you mean on my tray, all
(14:00):
said mister Boynton.
Speaker 2 (14:01):
Oh good. How do you like what they're serving in
the cafeteria these days? With Brooks?
Speaker 3 (14:04):
Well, it'll never replace food, But it isn't what you
eat in the place that's important anyway. It's with whom,
what's with whom? With whom you eat with whom? Or
as I once heard another English teacher say, what's with you?
Speaker 2 (14:22):
You're teasing me again with Brooks. But I'm getting kind
of used to it. I catch on much faster album
I used to. Don't you think?
Speaker 3 (14:27):
Oh, yes, you're really gone, mister Boynton.
Speaker 2 (14:31):
And that's what I finished my meat was. That's another
one of those colloquial expressions, isn't it gone? I wonder
what the derivation actually is how is simple expression like
the past tense of gold could assume the connotation with
which it's currently associated. It seems totally incomprehensible at first glance.
Speaker 3 (14:49):
Feature meat balls, mister Boyton, before they get warm again.
Speaker 4 (14:53):
Brooks, Mister Boynton.
Speaker 2 (14:55):
Well it's Harriet concl Hello, Harriet.
Speaker 6 (14:57):
Daddy wants to see you in his office right away,
mister Boyton.
Speaker 3 (14:59):
If you don't, and if he does mine, oh please,
miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (15:02):
Mister councklean wouldn't summon me during my lunch period unless
it was something important.
Speaker 3 (15:05):
I think it is.
Speaker 4 (15:06):
Daddy sounded very urgent.
Speaker 3 (15:08):
Maybe some of that ivy crawled into his office. You
haven't forgotten our date this afternoon, mister Barton.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Oh no, I'll call for you after school and take
you to the zoo. See you at free Miss Brooks,
all right, mister Barton.
Speaker 6 (15:20):
Mister Boynton isn't always as romantic as you'd like him
to be, as he Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (15:24):
No, Harriet, not always, or ever for that matter.
Speaker 4 (15:28):
Maybe it's just as well.
Speaker 6 (15:30):
You know how Daddy feels about faculty members fraternizing. Not
that I think Daddy's right. Sometimes Daddy can be pretty harsh.
What's then, if Daddy wasn't Daddy, what would he be?
Speaker 3 (15:41):
Mammy? I don't know, Harriet.
Speaker 6 (15:46):
I'm going up to the steam table and get some lunch.
Speaker 3 (15:48):
Miss Brooks, can I bring you anything? No? Thanks? Run along, Harriet, okay.
Speaker 6 (15:51):
Miss Brooks, Poor miss Brooks. She chases after mister Boynton,
just like Waterdetton runs after me.
Speaker 3 (16:01):
I beg your pardon. What's mister Brown?
Speaker 8 (16:03):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (16:03):
Hello, Harriet.
Speaker 7 (16:05):
This is mister Hastings, Harvey. This is ours good Conklin's daughter, Harriet.
Speaker 2 (16:09):
How do you do, my dear?
Speaker 3 (16:12):
So?
Speaker 9 (16:12):
It's a pleasure to meet a member of medicine's undergraduate buddy,
especially such a charming and lovely one as yourself.
Speaker 2 (16:18):
Why thank you, mister.
Speaker 1 (16:21):
Kelly.
Speaker 2 (16:25):
Mister Hastings and I were just talking. Harry.
Speaker 7 (16:27):
It will excuse you if you want to get to
the steam table.
Speaker 6 (16:30):
Huh oh yes, mister Brown.
Speaker 3 (16:34):
Will I see you again, mister Hastings.
Speaker 2 (16:36):
No, I would consider that a very fortuitous circumstance. Indeed, Harry,
you would golly.
Speaker 7 (16:42):
If I can't come back, you'd better not walk backwards, Harry.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
And a she did is marvelous.
Speaker 7 (16:58):
You've got something that may make women drop whatever they're doing.
Speaker 2 (17:01):
And concentrate on you. Oh, I don't know, mister Brill.
I just try to be pleasant to everyone. Well, you
keep it up.
Speaker 7 (17:07):
We'll have Connie Brooks in our English department in no time.
Speaker 2 (17:11):
And now, look, this is a good chance for you
to meet her.
Speaker 7 (17:13):
She's seated at that table over by the wall and
she's alone. It don't tell her too much right now,
but make an appointment for tea.
Speaker 2 (17:19):
Then we'll really go to work on her.
Speaker 9 (17:21):
Well, if you say so, mister Brill. But it does
seem like a kind of dirty trick. Will teacher so
hard to get nowadays?
Speaker 7 (17:27):
I think secret weapons, don't think they act. Now there's
miss Brooks Hastings.
Speaker 2 (17:32):
Sicker, yes, sir, and when I bring it back and
place hurt your feet, I expect the whole case of
strong high.
Speaker 9 (17:47):
I beg your pardon, Miss Brooks. But may I introduce
myself right?
Speaker 3 (17:50):
Yes? I suppose. Well I'm Constance Brooks.
Speaker 9 (17:56):
Yes I know my name is Hastings. Hastings. Are these
chairs occupied?
Speaker 3 (18:02):
Just the one I'm sitting in? I mean, help yourself, please.
Speaker 2 (18:06):
Thank you.
Speaker 9 (18:07):
I'm not going to be in town very long, Miss Brooks,
and I have to move rapidly, so may I take
you home after school.
Speaker 3 (18:14):
That's a little too rapidly. Just who are you, mister Hastings.
Speaker 9 (18:19):
Well, I'm I'm a sort of a friend of a
friend of mister he Has.
Speaker 2 (18:25):
I dropped over to day with mister Brill.
Speaker 3 (18:27):
Oh, the principle of play City High. What are you
doing here slumming?
Speaker 2 (18:33):
That must be the famous Brooks wit I've heard so
much about.
Speaker 3 (18:40):
You can stop now I have.
Speaker 9 (18:45):
Seriously, Miss Brooks, I think that your undergraduate body is wonderful.
Speaker 3 (18:50):
Mister Hastings.
Speaker 2 (18:55):
The kids, the kids, great bunch.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
Your faculty is nice too, Yes, I'll have them all.
Speaker 9 (19:04):
Miss Brooks's There's one thing I just can't understand. How
does a youthful, intelligent, lovely looking person like yourself happen
to be lunching alone?
Speaker 3 (19:15):
I beg your pardon?
Speaker 2 (19:16):
Didn't you hear what I said? Miss Brooks?
Speaker 3 (19:18):
You lost me after youthful?
Speaker 9 (19:24):
Really, I just can't figure it out all by yourself
in this big cafeteria.
Speaker 2 (19:29):
Oh, thing like this could never happen at Clay.
Speaker 3 (19:32):
City, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 9 (19:36):
I'm writing a book on the teaching of English and
high schools, and I'd certainly like to include an interview
with Madison's outstanding authority on the subject an interview.
Speaker 3 (19:47):
Well, I did have a date this afternoon.
Speaker 2 (19:49):
Shall we say tea for two at four?
Speaker 10 (19:53):
Well?
Speaker 3 (19:53):
I guess so. But there's something I can't help thinking.
Speaker 2 (19:56):
Oh what's that? Miss Brooks?
Speaker 3 (19:58):
T for two at four? Will me zoo for one
at three?
Speaker 2 (20:09):
And that's why I've summoned you to my office.
Speaker 1 (20:11):
Mister Boughton. Jason Brill and his secret weapon must be stopped.
You've got to make miss Brooks stay on at Madison.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
But why me, mister Conklin. You know how timid I am.
Got to get over it. Boy, you like Miss Brooks,
don't you? Oh? Yes, sir, But what about your stand
on fatternization. I've reversed it as of now.
Speaker 1 (20:28):
Look, Quyton, all you have to do is act the
way you really feel, or Betty yet the way you've
seen other people act.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
What do you mean, mister Conklor. Well, you've seen leading
men on the screen, haven't you.
Speaker 1 (20:39):
Humphrey bo got him knock on any door, Errol Flynn
and Don Juan.
Speaker 2 (20:43):
No, sir, I haven't seen those. Oh well, what's the
last movie you did see? The last movie I saw
is called I Believe it was called Arrowsmith. I don't
go to movies much, mister Conklin. You see, I'm more
of a radio fan. I listen to those mystery programs,
a lot of mystery programs.
Speaker 10 (20:59):
Right.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Well, that's just as good.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
According to my wife and daughter, those private detective fellows
are as attractive as any of the movies does.
Speaker 2 (21:05):
Now, why don't you act like one of them when
miss Brooks comes around me? Act like a private eye.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
Certainly from what I hear, most of them merely sit
behind a desk until some beautiful girl comes in. Then
they open the drawer, take a big drink, and then
they say, come on, babe, we're going on a caper.
Speaker 2 (21:23):
Whatever that is.
Speaker 1 (21:27):
Well, I won't take over an answer, Boydan, you've got
to do it with mister conk for Madison, boy tell
me that you'll try. Boyton, it's all ass I'll try.
Speaker 2 (21:48):
Come in.
Speaker 3 (21:49):
Oh it's me, mister Boyton. I'm glad I caught you
before you left school for the day. I won't be
able to go to the zoo with you this afternoon.
Mister Boyton, did you hear what I said? What are
you doing at that desk?
Speaker 2 (22:11):
Parked the frame? Baby, stashing right there. I watched the
Caper Sweetheart with Caper. Look, I know the opposition is
trying to put the heist on certain persons. Persons, but
we've got a few angles too. They can't get away
(22:31):
with it. See now we've got them covered like a
bubble dancer in Boston. See and that comes right from
mister bigg See.
Speaker 3 (22:39):
Thank you, Edward g. Robins.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
You've got to stay here, Miss Books. You can't leave, Matterson.
I don't know what their secret weapon is with you?
Just a minute?
Speaker 3 (22:48):
Who are we now, Buck Rogers?
Speaker 2 (22:50):
No, No, it's me, mister Poynton. That was just distilled water.
I drank. I don't know what mister Brill's planning, but
don't then.
Speaker 7 (22:58):
Perhaps i'd better explain it. My said, Well, then you'll
excuse us. I know the door was open. I believe
you've met mister Hastings.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
Miss Brooks, Oh, yes, I have.
Speaker 2 (23:06):
This is mister Boyton, mister Hasty. How do you do Hello.
We've got to get.
Speaker 7 (23:10):
Back to play City a little earlier than i'd plan,
Miss Brooks, so I'm afraid your interview will have to
be postponed.
Speaker 9 (23:15):
However, I'm sure that we can take up just where
we left off, and we are all together in clay
City and Clay City.
Speaker 7 (23:21):
Yes, as you know, a good teacher is always in
the man, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (23:26):
Teacher snatcher? What does he hold you? Miss Brooks, don't
listen to him, don't listen to anybody.
Speaker 3 (23:31):
Well, that isn't hard. Nobody's saying anything. He is all
this anyway.
Speaker 7 (23:35):
Mister Hastings here is head of the English department at
Clay City, Miss.
Speaker 2 (23:38):
Brook and he's your secret weapon. Well, if you want
to put it that way. Actually I'm a very simple man.
Speaker 3 (23:45):
Yes, you are in a jet propelled sort of way.
Speaker 2 (23:49):
I'll see here, Bill, I won't have you can't do it.
I'll have you all stopped puffing os. Good, you've come
to a station.
Speaker 7 (23:58):
What do you say, Miss Brooks, would you like to
transfer to Clay City transfer?
Speaker 3 (24:02):
Well, come to think of it, I have been overworking lately.
I might consider a transfer of that.
Speaker 2 (24:07):
Oh you can't, Miss Brooks. Oh why can't she? Have
you got some extra chores she can do without pay?
Speaker 3 (24:12):
How about it, mister Conklin, any more extra work?
Speaker 2 (24:15):
No, Miss Brooks, none at all. It's very pleasant at play, Citty,
Miss Brooks, say you'll come say you won't. Which is it,
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (24:21):
Well, it's quite a problem. But now I'd like to
ask a question, mister Brill, if I were a biology teacher,
would you want me to come to Clay City.
Speaker 2 (24:29):
A biology teacher? Well, frankly, no, there's no opening for
a biology teacher.
Speaker 3 (24:34):
That's all I wanted to know. Good day, gentlemen, I'm
remaining at Madison.
Speaker 1 (24:38):
Well we tried, Come on by, Miss Brooks, are good
for you, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (24:45):
Oh Madison lo.
Speaker 3 (24:51):
As old as Tommas and.
Speaker 1 (25:00):
Basketball short to day?
Speaker 3 (25:04):
How short the pay.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
We've been and manson we will still be there? Had man.
Speaker 3 (25:20):
Hello play today.
Speaker 2 (25:38):
E mardon of arms.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Brooks returns in just a moment.
Speaker 10 (25:41):
But first, dream Girl, dream Girl Beautiful luster Cream.
Speaker 8 (25:49):
Tonight show him how much lovelier your hair can look
after a luster cream shampoo. Only luster Cream brings you
came too. Its magic formula blend of secret and greets
plus gentle Lanolin gives loveliness, lather even in hardest water,
glamorizes your hair as you wash it. Luster Cream not
(26:09):
a soap, not a liquid, but a dainty cream shampoo
leave's hair fragrantly clean, free of loose dandriff, glistening with sheen, soft, manageable,
gives new beauty to all hairdoos or permanence four ounce jar,
one dollar smaller sizes either tubes or jars. Tonight try
Luster Cream shampoo and be a.
Speaker 10 (26:32):
Dream girl, dream girl, beautiful Luster cream girl. You your
crowning glory to.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
A Luster cream shampoo. And now once again, here is
our Miss Brooks.
Speaker 3 (26:53):
Well, mister Conklin finally left us all alone in mister
Boynan's laboratory.
Speaker 2 (26:57):
O Gars, Miss Brooks, if sure had me worried.
Speaker 3 (26:59):
Were you? I'm really afraid i'd leave. Mister Boynton.
Speaker 2 (27:02):
Sure, I couldn't even talk. I was so nervous.
Speaker 3 (27:04):
You didn't get much of a chance. But now that
we're alone, mister Boynton, is there anything else you want
to say to me?
Speaker 2 (27:11):
Yes, Miss Brooks, there is. What if we don't hurry,
we'll be late for the zoo? Where are you going,
Miss Brooks? What are you doing at my dest.
Speaker 3 (27:27):
Park? The frame? Baby? You're in for the caper of
your life.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
Next week?
Speaker 1 (27:39):
Clinging to another our Miss Brooks, Joe brought to you
by Palma y Colt, your beauty Hawk and Luster Cream Shampoo,
for soft, glamorous, caressible hair our. Miss Brooks starring Eve Arden,
is produced by Larry Burns, written and directed by Al Lewis,
with music by wilbra Hatch. Mister Boynton is played by
Jeff Chandler, Mister Conklin by Gail Gordon others in the
Night's Cast where James Morgan, Dick Cranna, Gloria McMillan, Gerald
(28:02):
Moore and Frank Nelson.
Speaker 11 (28:09):
Men, do you shave with a lather or brushless shaved cream?
Pomalid shaving cream comes both ways, and whichever way you
prefer to shave, you'll find that using either Pomolid brushless
or Pomlive laver shaving cream can bring you more comfortable,
actually smoother shaves.
Speaker 2 (28:25):
Here's the proof.
Speaker 11 (28:26):
Twenty five hundred and forty eight men tried the new
Pomolive waiter shave described on the tube, and no matter
how they had shaved before, three out of every four
got more comfortable, actually smoother shaves. Get Pomalive brushless or Pomlive.
Speaker 2 (28:40):
Lather shaving cream today.
Speaker 1 (28:45):
Or mystery liberally sprinkled with laughs. Listen to Mister and
Missus North the exciting, fun packed adventures of an amateur
detective and his beautiful white Tune in Tuesday evenings over
most of these same stations and be with us again
next week at the same time, or another other comedy
episode of our Miss Brooks vab Lemon speaking.
Speaker 2 (29:05):
Stay tuned now.
Speaker 1 (29:06):
For Life with Luigi, which follows immediately over most of
these same stations.
Speaker 2 (29:09):
This is CBS. We're ninety nine millions together.
Speaker 1 (29:12):
Everything they've drawn to a podcasting
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
My Favorite Murder with Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark
My Favorite Murder is a true crime comedy podcast hosted by Karen Kilgariff and Georgia Hardstark. Each week, Karen and Georgia share compelling true crimes and hometown stories from friends and listeners. Since MFM launched in January of 2016, Karen and Georgia have shared their lifelong interest in true crime and have covered stories of infamous serial killers like the Night Stalker, mysterious cold cases, captivating cults, incredible survivor stories and important events from history like the Tulsa race massacre of 1921. My Favorite Murder is part of the Exactly Right podcast network that provides a platform for bold, creative voices to bring to life provocative, entertaining and relatable stories for audiences everywhere. The Exactly Right roster of podcasts covers a variety of topics including historic true crime, comedic interviews and news, science, pop culture and more. Podcasts on the network include Buried Bones with Kate Winkler Dawson and Paul Holes, That's Messed Up: An SVU Podcast, This Podcast Will Kill You, Bananas and more.
The Joe Rogan Experience
The official podcast of comedian Joe Rogan.