Planes, Trains, and LA Vibes: Darren Carter & Mike Black’s Nostalgic Comedy Ride (Encore!) EP 324

In this lively episode of their podcast, Comedy Store regulars Darren Carter and Mike Black dive into a whirlwind of topics with their signature humor. They riff on the chaos and charm of Planes, Trains and Automobiles, swap stories about braving rain and ice, and geek out over computers and phones. The duo shares what makes living in LA unbeatable, from its vibrant scene to quirky gems like revival movie theaters. Plus, they take a nostalgic trip down memory lane with a nod to the classic Woolworth's. Expect laughs, tangents, and a dose of LA love!

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
And we're back. We really are back. We were gone
and now we're back. Calling mister Mike Black now that
we're back. That was kind of hack. Hello, we are back.

Speaker 2 (00:17):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (00:19):
Everybody listening to Derek Carter, we all know he's the
party starter. So if you want to listen to a podcast,
listen to a pocket party. Oh pocket party, they're wrong.

Speaker 1 (00:40):
Yeah, okay, let's keep the listeners updated. I know they're
on the edge of their seats. So what happened was
my computer crash and I had to put it in
the shop and it's been it's been there for like
they said seven to ten days, and it was more
like twelve to fourteen days. And it's funny, like something
that I did even use like years ago. Now it's

(01:02):
become a big part of my life because every day
I wake up, I drink my coffee, I edit my videos,
I upload them, and I try to move the needle
of my career a little bit further ahead, right, which
is you know, it's crazy, Like I I was on
the way to the computer store to pick up my computer,
and I thought, Man, what's worse for me, like not

(01:23):
having a computer or not having a car. When my
car was in the shop. And I got to be honest,
when my car was in the shop, they at least
gave me a rental and I could drive around while
they're out there fixing it in mysterious land, like okay,
they're doing their thing, and then sure enough I get
the car back. Boom the car. You know. But I
mean that that's a big part of it that they
gave me a rental. So that was a bit more than.

Speaker 2 (01:45):
Some computer place tried giving out rentals. And when they
got it back, they were so loaded with born except yeah, we.

Speaker 1 (01:53):
Yeah, there's our Yeah, our computers are disgusted. There's all
this stuff all over it. Yeah, we don't know, yeah exactly.
And I wouldn't even want to loan a loaner computer
because you're right, You're like, I don't know, man, this
feels weird putting all my passwords in this thing and
I'm giving it. Oh god, yeah, you know, like yeah,
so exactly, and it's just and it would just even

(02:14):
be a nightmare of memory. I'm sure there's like people
that are really organized. They're like, no, you put your
passwords here and then you offload it and you save
it to this disk driver. I'm not even using the
right words, but you know what I mean, Like, so, oh.

Speaker 2 (02:27):
Yeah, well I did a thing yesterday that I was
like trying to see if there was a way to
expand the life of my PlayStation four and online they
are all sorts of tips and stuff, and one guy
was like, yeah, you can empty all the like empty
out the cachet and reconstruct the the drive or whatever,

(02:53):
and that'll you do that once a month and it
kind of like cleans out all the cobwebs basically, like
oh great, And so I did that and I didn't
really think about it. And then when I turned it
back on, it was like, you know that you can
download video games on it. It was like the first

(03:15):
time using it all over again. Oh wow, Oh man,
I got to go through all the preferences and everything.

Speaker 1 (03:20):
Oh yeah, see.

Speaker 2 (03:21):
Change everything, you know. And uh, whenever my phone gets
new software, it it doesn't save preferences. It's like, ah,
screw all that. He still want to just start fresh
with the things we like to do, like having your
bluetooth on. Like I'll be walking around with my bluetooth

(03:42):
on around Los Angeles for like two days before I
know that it's on and it's like that anyone who
hacks would be just pouncing on it, you know.

Speaker 1 (03:53):
Yeah, yeah, yeah he doesn't. Yeah, exactly, all those little
weird things, right yeah, like, uh, do you have an iPhone?

Speaker 2 (04:01):
Yeah?

Speaker 1 (04:02):
I think they have like a thing where people can
send you it can air drop stuff to you if
you don't have it, like.

Speaker 2 (04:07):
Right yeah if if if you have it on like.

Speaker 1 (04:11):
Open to anybody, unless you.

Speaker 2 (04:12):
Really know what you're doing, you just shouldn't mess with
bluetooth is yeah.

Speaker 1 (04:18):
Yeah exactly, like just use it for like I use
Bluetooth only for my AirPods, like when I'm in my radio,
but or my speaker. But yeah, because I've heard of cases.

Speaker 2 (04:28):
Like devices that you know and stuff like that.

Speaker 1 (04:30):
Yeah, oh yeah, that's what they say unknown devices. Yeah,
because there's like I've heard of cases of people like
you know, dropping dick pics on airplanes to people, you know,
like through uh.

Speaker 2 (04:40):
Air drop right, or like this device wants to pair
with you and download all your data.

Speaker 1 (04:48):
So yeah, it's like.

Speaker 2 (04:50):
People think, oh, someone just wants to use my Wi
Fi on the plane. What could that hurt?

Speaker 1 (04:54):
Well yeah, becau there's people who get a kick out
of it. They know they know how to do it
once they're O keep doing this and just yeah, screw that.
I hate that.

Speaker 2 (05:02):
Yeah, Like they're not even trying to be criminals, are
just trying to be dicks, you know.

Speaker 1 (05:06):
Yeah, So I put the I got the computer back
and then and of course, you know it's so weird,
like do you have a computer?

Speaker 2 (05:14):
Uh no, not really?

Speaker 1 (05:15):
So that's great. See that none of these problems would
even exist to you, Like you're not, You're not.

Speaker 2 (05:20):
I used to have a iPad, but I didn't know
how to carry it around, you know, like you just
walking around in society. I was like, I don't want
to keep it in a bag.

Speaker 1 (05:33):
Oh your iPad. Usually people put it in the in
a they get a cover for it, like a nice.

Speaker 2 (05:40):
Yeah I know, but like it just seems silly to
have this shumongous oh yeah version of my phone basically
true that I can carry around, you know.

Speaker 1 (05:51):
Yeah, yeah, I see what you're saying that you didn't
really fit in your pocket and you're like.

Speaker 2 (05:56):
Yeah, the only thing it was good for was like
it took better pictures. But I was like, I really
don't care about pictures enough.

Speaker 1 (06:05):
Oh yeah, that's true, because there's a lot of uh.
I think I've seen some Christmas movies. I forget what
it was called, but it was, uh with Will Ferrell
where the children are doing like their Christmas rehearsal or
their Christmas show at the elementary school, and all they said, please,
no photos, we have a professional photographer that will be
videographying this show. And then the minute these kids start singing,

(06:28):
all these giant iPads go up in the air and
block everyone's view. All right, Yeah, it was so funny
to see, Like, but yeah.

Speaker 2 (06:37):
I was like, it might be great for taping stand
up but I thought anyone who sees that in the
back of the room is just gonna go, oh, free iPad.

Speaker 1 (06:45):
Exactly with all this banking information on it, right, Yeah, yeah,
you know it's uh so like what I use my
computer for. My wife will differs. She's like, every time
I walk in, you're listening to Weezer on it or
Franks and I.

Speaker 2 (07:00):
She should be so grateful, she should fall to her
knees praying thank God that when I walk in on
my husband on the computer, he's listening to old ditties
from the forties and fifties or whatever.

Speaker 1 (07:16):
Let it snow, Let it snow. Let it snow.

Speaker 2 (07:20):
Tell her next time she gives you any grief about that.
That's around the otherwives, if they've ever worked on their
husband on the computer, No, but they could tell you
a few horror stories about that.

Speaker 1 (07:32):
Right. But once I learned how to edit, I was like, Oh,
this is this is like in my hands. I don't
have to rely on like taking. I used to go
to like like an editor and he would edit stuff
and they charge you by the hour, and then you
get your stuff back and he'd burn it to you know,
all that stuff. So once I figured out, I was like,
I got for me personally. I got tired of not
knowing how to do stuff. So I go on YouTube

(07:52):
watch the tutorials, and around four years ago I just
kickstarted my YouTube up. I'm like, oh, I'm gonna put
out podcast videos and then I'll tell you what really
helps is shorts. If anyone out there is trying to
do anything on YouTube, upload shorts.

Speaker 2 (08:06):
YouTube shorts, like just the ones you're wearing.

Speaker 1 (08:09):
Yeah, yeah, upload your YouTube shorts. Try to stuff a
zucchini down there and an egg plant, but you're like, hey,
I gotta get my iPad back.

Speaker 2 (08:18):
Look at the viewers I'm getting I'm getting views.

Speaker 1 (08:21):
No, but it's it's their version of like TikTok. So
you I'm gonna go technical real quick nine by sixteen
where the video version is up and down like like
uh not horizontal? Yeah, what's the not the word horizontal?
What's the other word vertical? Vertical? Yes? Boom? How do
you remember the word? I know horizontal because and this
is maybe I'm a sick PERV, but I know horizontal

(08:43):
means lay down, and I would always seen horror isontal.
That's how know it laid down?

Speaker 2 (08:49):
Really sad? Horizontal you guys, I remember someone calling it
the horizontal mambo.

Speaker 1 (08:56):
Oh yeah, see there you go. They. By the way,
shout out to Alex. He and his son listened to
the podcast. I saw him at the comedy store and
he said that because this show is mainly clean, his
eleven year old son likes to listen to it on
the way to school. So shout out Alex and son.

Speaker 2 (09:14):
Yeah, so it's clean basically except for me. Except but I.

Speaker 1 (09:18):
Said, you said, yeah, oh you guys got dirty. You
said horizontal mambo.

Speaker 2 (09:24):
If that counts as dirty.

Speaker 1 (09:26):
Oh, I'll have to blop that mambo. Word. No exactly.
I don't think they mind a few because they probably hear.

Speaker 2 (09:33):
Dirty replace all the F bombs with mambo.

Speaker 1 (09:36):
Yeah, they were mamboed. Yeah. Yeah, that was h It's
so cool to me speaking of that.

Speaker 2 (09:42):
I just saw, you know, because it's the Thanksgiving season,
they had a I think it was like the thirty
fifth anniversary of Planes, Trains and Automobile. Oh.

Speaker 1 (09:52):
I love that movie.

Speaker 2 (09:54):
And when he comes to the rental car, oh, I
love that gives that monologue of F bomb and it's
the lady. She's such a great character actress. But I
think her name is Aadie McClure.

Speaker 1 (10:08):
Mcclu yes.

Speaker 2 (10:12):
Yeah, she just crushes it in that scene because it's
like the cheeriest, nicest person in the world and he's
just balling her out like so beautifully. It was John
Hughes was such an amazing filmmaker. Uh, just to come
up with that movie in the first place, but that

(10:33):
it was so well done. And I was watching it
and I was like, everyone in this movie is just
at the top of their game. Steve Martin, John Canon,
all the character actors that they meet throughout their journey
are are just incredible. It's such a good film. If
you guys haven't seen it, check it out.

Speaker 1 (10:54):
It's so good. Let me see if I can find
that monologue planes trains and.

Speaker 2 (11:00):
They have to bleep a lot, but yeah.

Speaker 1 (11:02):
Well I know, Uh hold on, I'm gonna see if
I can find it written though, uh monolog? Oh gosh,
can you keep talking? I'm sorry this thing you wanted
me to put passwords in. I just want to look
up something on Google. What the heck? Ah so annoying. Okay,

(11:23):
I already put in my password. Maybe later, screw it.
You want to just Google something and it's like, yeah,
forget it. So annoying.

Speaker 2 (11:36):
I think I remember almost all of them.

Speaker 1 (11:39):
Or he's like yeah yeah, because he just had headed
up to his ears and he was like, my my
rental car, Yeah yeah.

Speaker 2 (11:44):
Yeah, and the she goes, may I help you, and
he goes, you can start by wiping that dumb ass,
fucking smile off your rosy fucking cheeks. Sir. I really
don't care for the way you're speaking. Well, I really
don't here for the way your company left me in
the middle of fucking nowhere with fucking t's to a
fucking car that isn't fucking there. And I had to

(12:07):
walk down a fucking runway to get here just to
have you look at me with that dumb ass, fucking face.
I want a fucking car, four fucking wheels in a seat,
a fucking Dodson, a fucking Buick, a fucking Hundie. I
want a fucking car, right fucking now, do you have

(12:30):
your rental agreement? I threw it away. Oh boy, oh boy,
what you're fucked?

Speaker 1 (12:41):
It was so good.

Speaker 2 (12:42):
Pretty close to it, that's.

Speaker 1 (12:44):
Pretty close to yeah.

Speaker 2 (12:49):
But yeah, I remember saying that at school, like to
my friends at school and just cracking them up. I
had a lot of friends that didn't have cable, so
I would act out movies for them.

Speaker 1 (13:01):
That's funny. I did that with Rocky three.

Speaker 2 (13:03):
I did that look yeah, that and with a lot
of stand up. Like if I did what I did
back then professionally, i'd be banned from the business. I
was just stealing all these jokes, but I credited everyone.
That was the funny part is even as a kid,
I understood that. I was like, these are not my jokes.
This is I'm doing Rodney Dangerfield's jokes right now.

Speaker 1 (13:24):
I remember this girl told me I was really funny
in ninth grade and I was like, but I'm just
doing Eddie Murphy's material or I didn't say material. Yeah,
I'm just doing I'm just saying what Eddie Murphy said.
She's like, but you're funny, And I realized, like, oh,
because I'm not. I'm saying stuff other than Eddie Murphy.
And then that's just the cherry on top of the
pie or whatever you'd say, you know.

Speaker 2 (13:42):
Yeah, and you were learning from that, you know, like
learning how to tell a joke.

Speaker 1 (13:47):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (13:48):
You know a lot of people you can give them
the greatest joke in the world and they cannot tell it.
They just it's an actual skill. Like I don't think
you and I think about it that much. But you know,
why did the Chicken cross the Road? Is challenging as
hell to a lot of people, right, yeah, yeah, the timing,

(14:10):
the just understanding the jokes that you're telling. You know
a lot of people don't do that, you know. Yeah,
like a in public speak, just you know, being able
to having the confidence to tell a joke, whether it's
funny or not, to the audience that you're targeting.

Speaker 1 (14:29):
Another thing that you learn is I've learned as time
has gone on just in the real world, you know,
not stand up, but like the real world is knowing
when to like lay low and just let other people shine.
Like I don't have to be the center of attention,
you know. When I was younger, you're just so hungry
for that laugh, Like if everything that's comes to your
mind it could be funny, You're like you stort out there.
Then then eventually you learn like, oh, I don't have

(14:52):
to do that. Now I can just let I can
kind of that was one thing I really learned, and yeah.

Speaker 2 (14:58):
Let someone else shine a little bit. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (15:00):
Yeah. And also you learn like the pacing of it,
Like if I'm always the one that every time open
my mouth I say something, after a while that kind
of wears thin. You become the annoying guy, you know,
like you're always on, You're always on, you know.

Speaker 2 (15:12):
Yeah, even if you're hilarious. Uh, people get start rolling
their eyes.

Speaker 1 (15:19):
Oh he's got his hand up, he's gonna ask a question.
It's gonna be trying to be funny again. Yeah, you know,
it's like I learned. Yeah, I remember I'd be in
these acting classes, you know, and I was like, oh,
let me just pace it, maybe say two funny things
per class, like don't don't every time I throw my
you know.

Speaker 2 (15:38):
Yeah, less there is more a lot of times on
stuff like that, you know. But yeah, Like I had
a friend that I will say it was but I
had a friend in college who he was all about volume.
He was like, I'm gonna tell fifty thousand jokes and
maybe three of them will hit, but I'll be happy

(15:59):
that three of them hit.

Speaker 1 (16:01):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (16:01):
Man, that got old fast. And like it was just
like the first day, everyone this guy's a genius. And
then like two weeks later they're like, I need him
to be moved.

Speaker 1 (16:12):
Down the hall, give him the light.

Speaker 2 (16:14):
I don't want him living near me.

Speaker 1 (16:17):
Yeah. Man, I was outside earlier today. Uh you know,
I don't usually get out that early. But with the
time change. By the way, with the time change, my
clock is right in my car again. Oh good for
you that time is correct again.

Speaker 2 (16:31):
But uh, you have to celebrate those little victories.

Speaker 1 (16:33):
Little victory six months out of the year the time
is correct. Yeah, they supposedly the clock is gonna it's
the dealership was like, yeah, it's gonna all change. And
then everyone's clock is is going to be correct again
when it connects to like this on this date and
then and the date has come and gone, and it
did get it a little bit more correct. At least

(16:55):
it's within the hour, like it's on the hour, like
it's correct. It's just it's still five minutes fast, which
I'm cool with.

Speaker 2 (17:01):
But yeah, that's that's the upside of that technology. The
downside of it is that they'll be able to control
your speed.

Speaker 1 (17:08):
I know, right, like yeah, yeah, we were just like.

Speaker 2 (17:11):
Great, my clock's on time, but I'm late and there's
nothing I can.

Speaker 1 (17:14):
Do about it now, Yeah, Lucky mean you're late, but
my clock's on time.

Speaker 2 (17:24):
Wah.

Speaker 1 (17:28):
Yeah, so I was up early, you know, with the
whole time change, you're like wow. And especially because it
rained a couple days ago, it is so bright outside
today here in Los Angeles, Like the sky is blue,
the sun is shining.

Speaker 2 (17:38):
Yeah, it's always great after it's rained, you know, like
the when the sun comes out, it really pops out
after sure does.

Speaker 1 (17:47):
Man, was that thing you said earlier on the phone
about the LA makes its own gravy or something?

Speaker 2 (17:52):
Yeah, yeah, just when it rains on LA, it does
all the street slime and you.

Speaker 1 (17:58):
Know, yeah, you know we have like the l A River, right,
which is just I saw online. I saw a car
floating in the river, like just the water rushing picking
up the car, oh God, pushing it around.

Speaker 2 (18:11):
Yeah, it's not quite Detroit level, where like there was
that lake that caught fire because of all the chemicals
and stuff. You know, like we're not quite there yet,
but we're working on.

Speaker 1 (18:23):
Did you get did you get the flood warning on
Tuesday on your phone?

Speaker 2 (18:27):
I did, and it was just bullshit for for me anyway,
Like like I looked outside and I was like, it's
a light drizzle, but you know, it was kind of like,
you know, people joke about it all the time. No
one in LA knows how to drive in the rain. Yeah,
and it can be like the lightest drizzle ever and
they're just freaking out on the freeway. You know, they

(18:50):
just don't know what the hell they're doing. But you
know the truth is, I like I lived in Colorado,
which was more snow than rain, and it's a different
thing alter other. But I went to the Grove the
other day and none of La is built for rain,
even though it rains here all the time. But that's

(19:10):
like a big outdoor mall with cement walkways all over
the place, and after it's rained, those basically become slipping slides,
you know, like it's all smooth marble and stuff like that.
So they had put out all these rugs, you know,
so that people could walk on something with traction. And

(19:32):
I'm walking on those, and I'm seeing other people walking
on the concrete part, and I'm like, oh, you never
actually hurt yourself before, Like that shit all changed once.
You if you've ever like slipped and fallen and like

(19:52):
hit your back or something like that, oh, suddenly all
that stuff is no joke anymore. You're just like, nope,
I'll get on this rug or whatever whatever it takes
to feel safe. Oh yeah.

Speaker 1 (20:05):
One time I was in Milwaukee and I was funny,
hows the Wordwaukee in at Milwaukee And I was mill
running and uh, I was coming from my home. I
got off the elevator and they had just mopped the
lobby and it was I went down the little ramp
and of course it's at an angle and boom, I
fell down hard. Oh you know, at that time, I
was probably like thirty. So I fell down. It hurt,

(20:27):
but I just popped up and kept going. But I thought, man,
what if you're older and you actually or maybe hit
the back of your head or something.

Speaker 2 (20:33):
Yeah, if you're older, you can do some real damage.
But I remember when I was a kid, there was
a a store called Bulworth's that used to be a
pretty famous chain.

Speaker 1 (20:44):
Oh yeah, Woolworths.

Speaker 2 (20:45):
But they had a I remember it was around Christmas time.
We were Christmas shopping and there was a like glass
doors as you came in, and like a sheet of
black ice on the ground in front of it. Now,
black ice is just ice on black concrete, and it's

(21:07):
really treacherous because people don't know it's there. Yeah, so
this was a combination of black eyes and the glass
doors that no one could fucking see. Whoa. And so
my mom was like, uh, come on, let's go shop.
I was like, you go on ahead, I'm gonna see
how this plays out for a minute. And sure enough,

(21:32):
this dude came in like big, heavy set guy. And
I'm a little bastard kid, I don't care and don't
warn him or anything like that. Yeah, but he walks
right into the door like and you hear his head
goes like took some like against the door and then
he kind of like is knocked back by that, and

(21:52):
then the black Ice gets somebody like falls over and
I was like, yes.

Speaker 1 (21:57):
Yes in real life, yes, yeah, hey, I just have
a new product for you. You could after the shows,
you can stand by the exit and sell Mike black Ice.

Speaker 2 (22:07):
Yeah, that's not a bad And he was lying there
like help me up, help me up, and no one
would help him up. And there's all he saw was
this like seven year old kid, just pointing and laughing
while he waited for someone to help him.

Speaker 1 (22:21):
Oh man, there.

Speaker 2 (22:23):
Got me back. I like to think that that guy
if he like he has passed on, or maybe he
just saw me around town. I have slipped on black
eyes probably twenty times in my life. Whoa like. I
used to wear Doc Martin's just because I was more

(22:44):
of a punk kind of kid, and they are not
made for snow and they have no traction whatsoever on
the bottom of it, and so I would slip all
over the place, you know, wearing those things. One time,
I was putting my in my car and my feet
just went out from under me. But I didn't let

(23:04):
the key. I was like holding the door as my
body falls completely all the way down. I was like
this has to look just idiotic at anyone who saw it.

Speaker 1 (23:14):
You know, Man, don't get caught slipping on that black ice. Yes,
I yeah, I wasn't gonna say so. I was outside
and it was just so sunny and and it just
I do like when it when it rains. Uh, you know,
it's funny that flood warning thing I was doing. It
was during one of my writing sessions with Frasier Smith.

Speaker 2 (23:37):
Oh and you guys were in severe danger.

Speaker 1 (23:41):
Yes, severe danger. Well I knew, I knew it was
they said. They said it was at the steakhouse. They
were like, it's gonna rain really hard all day Tuesday.
So he's like, hey, what day of the week do
you want to get together? Go let's get together Tuesday
because we can't go outside anyways. So we got together
at three and uh. I I usually end up parking
on the street because I'm like, I don't want to
do valet. This is you know, I'm not going to

(24:01):
pay ten bucks to you know what I mean, or
whatever it is. I'm like, Eh, let's park on the street,
which is usually fine, and it's you know, plenty of
parking spaces. And during that twenty minutes from the time
I left to go over there. It was a crazy
rain storm. That's that's when like it was I don't

(24:21):
know if it was a microburst, but it was just
pouring down like we're talking like movie like epic movie hurricane,
like like just we have the windshield wipers on all
full blast and the water next to you looks like
a river where it's just like like just rushing down
in the gutter. And there was one spot available and

(24:42):
it was by a storm drain where all this water
was just rushing into the storm drain. But I I
cautioned because I was like, you know, I remember the
story of a friend that back in the nineties parked
by a storm drain and somehow debris got got cut
up on the river and then it or you know,
of the rushing water and it got caught and then
next thing, you know, trash is blocking the storm drain

(25:02):
and then build a puddle and then water got into
his park car and believe it or not, in La
his car got total because of water damage.

Speaker 2 (25:10):
Yeah. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah that can happen. So
everyone assumes that their cars are these air tight capsules. Yeah,
and it's like, no, if the air conditioner can get
to you water, right and all that stuff. You don't
want your engine you get three feet of water.

Speaker 1 (25:31):
No, no, no, ever, although spark the spark plugs get
doused and.

Speaker 2 (25:35):
Yeah, and like the glove box is pretty much leads
to the outside. If you flip it open and look
up under it, it goes straight to the outside. So
you don't want you Also in La, you shouldn't put
a lot of food in your car either, you know,
because that attracts, you know, from outside rodents and whatnot.

Speaker 1 (25:58):
Yeah, you're right.

Speaker 2 (25:59):
They like I saw I was, like I stopped at
a Walgreens and there was a you know how you
like sometimes can see other cars in the parking lot,
and I just motion and caught my eye. Yeah, I
saw a rat go up under someone's car, crawl up
where it went. I'm gonna shop somewhere else down. Well,

(26:26):
it's like any place in LA has that problem.

Speaker 1 (26:29):
Oh, you're right. Whenever we go to the farm, my
wife's always like, Okay, make sure there's no like loose
like nuts in your car, like cashews or just almonds
or whatever, you know, like smart. But you're right, though,
that's you don't want that because you know, I know
the cats like to go up and rest on the
tires and the engines and stuff. But you're right, that's uh.

Speaker 2 (26:47):
Like I remember when I first moved here seeing some
guy talk to a valet and he goes, please leave
the windows rolled up. I know you guys like to
roll them down for convenience and stuff. Please leave my
windows rolled up? And I remember thinking, what a dick,
you know, given the ballet all these demands and stuff
like that. And now now anytime I have to do like,
can you please please leave the windows roll down?

Speaker 1 (27:08):
Yeah? And you know how I have that that rope
ladder that you guys usually put so the animals can
climb up the rope ladder. Can you, like, please don't
unravel the rope ladder?

Speaker 2 (27:16):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (27:17):
To my passenger door.

Speaker 2 (27:20):
Please please do not leave a block of.

Speaker 1 (27:24):
Can you please not leave a bag of cheese? Some
loose carrots?

Speaker 2 (27:28):
And that's all?

Speaker 1 (27:29):
I have bread crumbs leading to the road. Yeah. Yeah.
Can you please surround.

Speaker 2 (27:36):
Dangle a tiny mouse to attract other minds?

Speaker 1 (27:39):
And do you mind surrounding my tesla with mouse traps?
If you don't mind this.

Speaker 2 (27:44):
Ball of yarn that you've put in here? Not catnip
and yeah, the gravy trail all the way to the door.

Speaker 1 (27:52):
But that's hilarious. You just leave like yeah, roach motels
all over your dashboard right the valet's like this guy's insulting. No,
I'm cautious. I've listened to.

Speaker 2 (28:05):
I freak out when a fly comes into my car.

Speaker 1 (28:08):
You know it's a weird. Yeah, I know what you're saying.

Speaker 2 (28:10):
You all like, get out, get out.

Speaker 1 (28:12):
Yeah, roll the windows down, like get out there, blow
out there just you know, Yeah.

Speaker 2 (28:17):
I'm trying to like coax it out of the car,
and it's like, meanwhile, oncoming traffic.

Speaker 1 (28:22):
I know, you gotta be careful. I've been. I was
in my car once and a b was in there
and I just rolled the windows down and just didn't
think about it. So just blow all that way, just
get out of here.

Speaker 2 (28:31):
You know. My first thought is always if I don't
get rid of it right now, it's gonna lay eggs
and then I'm gonna have a thousand flies.

Speaker 1 (28:39):
And here, looking like pig Pin from Charlie Brown, right
there comes Mike Black. Oh, that'd be hilarious, just a
big like what happened?

Speaker 2 (28:50):
Someone left a cash in his car?

Speaker 1 (28:54):
Now he has to put spiders in there to get
the eggs, the flies. You have a whole thing going on.

Speaker 2 (28:59):
Like yeah, and then he put a horse in there
to catch the cow.

Speaker 1 (29:05):
Yeah yeah, yeah. So so I when I parked, I
made sure I kind of was on a little bit
of a grade to the water was like rushing past
me and I and I parked about I know, you're
like legally supposed to park eighteen inches from the curb,
but I kind of what Yeah, yeah, you're not supposed
to go right up against the curb, supposed to not
go I.

Speaker 2 (29:24):
Get not right up against the curb. But do they
realize how far eighteen inches is from the curb?

Speaker 1 (29:30):
Oh wait a second, The law is you can't be
further than eighteen inches. That's what it was. Further than inches.

Speaker 2 (29:34):
Oh okay. I was like, that's insanity.

Speaker 1 (29:37):
So yeah, you got it. So I made sure that
I was about at the limit. That way the water
would go by and in case anything caught up, it
wouldn't like go up into the car. And my car
was fine and the water was it was good. But uh,
by the time I parked and walked to the front
door of the steakhouse, the rain had started to like become,

(29:58):
like you said, more of a like regular rain, Like Okay,
this isn't so I have an umbrella and I have
a rain jacket, but this isn't crazy rain. And yeah,
and then we got the alarm like flood warning and
I was like, did he get bat again? And I
went outside again just to check, and you're right, it
wasn't much. But apparently as the storm cloud was moving east,
it you know, it went to like those burn areas

(30:19):
where all the mudslides could happen and all that. So
maybe the flood was out maybe more towards you know,
Alta Dina or Big Bear or whatever.

Speaker 2 (30:27):
Yeah, that's that's part of the problem with California is
that it's such a huge area that you know, you'll
get like I'll get Amber alerts on my phone and
it's like the last scene in San Diego and it's like, okay,
well there's nothing I can do about San Diego, you know.

Speaker 1 (30:44):
Yeah. Yeah. What was one of the jokes we wrote
for Fraser, like something about I'm sweating like Johnny Depp
getting an Amber alert like Amber heard alert. Yeah, I understand,
and I love writing. Yeah, they don't work for me,
but jokes. Okay, you know you know Kanye right, his
nickname is Yee Yeah. Okay, we'll come back to that. Okay,

(31:06):
So that was well, no, no, that wasn't I just
wanted to let the audience know that so they'll get
this next joke. Boy, Kanye even got canceled from Christmas Carols. Yeah,
they took the ye out of Oh come all ye faithful,
Come on, guys, that's Fraser's Isn't it funny how I

(31:27):
think other people's acts wouldn't work for us.

Speaker 2 (31:31):
Like because well, yeah, it's true.

Speaker 1 (31:33):
I mean there's comedians that are you know, they're kind
of known for like stealing jokes. But I mean it's
I think but generally, like things that I do probably
wouldn't work for you or Fraser, things that Fraser Smith
does wouldn't work for you or me, And things that
you do wouldn't work for me or Fraser.

Speaker 2 (31:49):
It's yeah, I think you don't see a lot of
guys stealing entire acts. You see them steal like one
or two jokes. Yeah, that are kind of universal truths
that anyone could tell. Like, I don't have a lot
of those in my act, so I don't worry about it,
but yeah, you know, but there are some jokes that
are just like anyone could tell that joke, right, And

(32:13):
I think there are definitely guys that look for those
that look for like, oh I could That's a joke
that I could tell and no one would notice or
no one would think I stole it, you know, And
we know you're out there. You bastards do that.

Speaker 1 (32:28):
And you're listening now for some gold, but you're not
going to get it.

Speaker 2 (32:32):
The truth is, though, like a lot of those guys
make the mistake of putting it out on social media,
and usually eventually, if you do that long enough, someone
is going to find other like social media that predates
yours by a long time where it's like, oh, that's

(32:53):
an old Jerry Seinfeld joke, you know. And there are
a lot of people out there that love finding stuff
like that and going this guy stole this, this and this.
That's what happened to Mancia, you know, and a few
other comics that's happened to like they they actually talked
about it on the show, But Dane Cook had a

(33:17):
lot of stuff that was very very similar to Louis
c k and so a lot of people put out
you know, clips of of both of them side by
side going, you know, you be the judge. But Louis
c K did this ten years ago, you know, Yeah.

Speaker 1 (33:33):
That was weird and there was like three bits. Yeah,
I remember, like and I was like, wow, there.

Speaker 2 (33:38):
They actually like Louis c K did a pretty cool
thing by having him on the show. Louis and they
made a whole episode about the two of them having
to talk to each other because of them, and they
and they I think they just I don't think they
wrote a script. I think they just hashed out their

(34:00):
beef with each other on camera and it was pretty
interesting to watch, you.

Speaker 1 (34:05):
Know, you know, like who's on first that famous Aberdeen
costel a bit?

Speaker 2 (34:13):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (34:14):
I used to listen a lot to Gilbert Godfrey's podcast
and they were saying that they weren't the first comedians
to do that, like they were the ones that made
it famous and they're known for it, but it was
like a common vaudeville bit apparently.

Speaker 2 (34:25):
Yeah, bod Bill was a different animal. It was everyone
did everything. Like basically the rule of Bodbil, from what
I understood, was if you see something and you can
actually do it yourself, do it. You know, like back

(34:47):
then this was like sing for your supper times. This
was the depression and stuff like that, you know. And
so if if you saw someone juggle and you're like,
I'm gonna go learn how to juggle so I can
feed myself and not die, right, you know, it was
a different time. It's like now, you know, people stealing
from each other. I'm a lot less inclined to forgive.

(35:11):
But at that time it was like, oh, that guy
knows how to tap dance, I'm going to learn how
to tap dance too. It was like a business. It
was like, you know, the way you stayed alive.

Speaker 1 (35:21):
Yeah, I think it went further than like just juggling,
and I think it was actually like bits, you know,
like stories and right.

Speaker 2 (35:28):
There was like but yeah, it was Bundle was like
all kinds of different acts, but they had like, yeah,
little sketches and stuff like that that people would do
and like Chaplain would do. Before he got famous for
being the Tramp, he was really well known in England
for being a really good drunk act. You know, he

(35:49):
would go on stage and do a whole sketch as
a drunk guy and people loved it. But there were
like fifty guys doing that, you know, and a lot
of them would do the exact same material here and there,
and nobody really cared as long as they got fed,
you know, and stuff like that. You know, it didn't

(36:09):
really matter because it wasn't like anyone was getting super
super famous off of it, you know, and it wasn't
like the idea everyone knew that was watching Bodville that like, oh,
a lot of this stuff mashes together and it's all
just a kind of a grab bag. But with stand up,

(36:31):
the big distinction I think with stand up is that
when you go on stage, what you're selling to the
audience is your original thoughts or at least the idea
of that that like, oh, this is me giving you
stuff from my point of view in my life. And
so if all of that is taken from other comedians,

(36:54):
it sucks.

Speaker 1 (36:55):
You know, it sucks. It's like and then it, yeah, exactly,
because the comedians who are like true artists, who really
you know, come up with our own stuff, tell our
own stories, have our own ideas. Then you see someone
else just sort of skimming off the top.

Speaker 2 (37:10):
And yeah, to me, at that point, it's not stand up.
It's karaoke basically yeah, you know, only you're not giving
credit to the artists that created it. You're going, oh,
I thought of this myself. But what's the deal with
Raisin brand? You know right? Well, like that's not you dude. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (37:29):
And you know what's great is like every single joke
that I say on stage, I can tell you when
I came up with the how, how the situation happened.
And it's great when it's real, you know what I mean. Like,
for example, my son is h he's almost five ten.
By the way, you guys can look him up on YouTube.
He has his own channel of music and Instagram and

(37:49):
everywhere else TikTok is. His real name is Austin Carter,
but on on everything else, look up us the bass
Boss and it's spelled A U S T A G
B A S S B O S S the link.
So I put the link on all my YouTube videos
as the base Boss. But anyways, so one day, you know,

(38:15):
he had some uh some shorts, some like pants and
shorts and stuff, and my wife was like, hey, you're
out growing these. Now here's what's funny, Mike. I have
a I guess apparently I have I have shorter legs
but a longer torso, so I may be like, I'm
five eleven, but that's but I'm you know, I'm from
the so I'm I'm I'm long, but from the waist
up right, Apparently I've come to find out.

Speaker 2 (38:37):
Yeah, yeah, and exactly.

Speaker 1 (38:40):
That's what I was. I guess I was a wrestler,
but and good at pull ups or whatever. But so
I was like, well, let me see if I can, uh,
let me try those pants out, dude that his actual
pants and shorts fit. I'm like, any shorts that I've
been wearing the last six months, they used to belong
to my son. So then I came up with a
joke right then and there, I thought. I said something
like I never thought one day I'd be wearing hand

(39:00):
me ups, you know, and it's cute, it's real and
you know it's hand me up or you know, like
that's a real story that really happened, and you're like, oh,
tell me up.

Speaker 2 (39:10):
Sounds a lot better than I'm wearing my son's underweg exactly.

Speaker 1 (39:13):
Yeah. Yeah, here's a silly joke that we came up
with the other day, and this is a true story.
I'm going to figure out how to say it. I've
said it a couple of times and it is funny,
but it is a pun, but it's true. I was
in the shower and as I was taking a shower,
you know, my wife's a great cook, and she cooks
like almost every day and probably every day actually, but
but I'm hearing the pots and the pants and the

(39:34):
dishes and I'm like, oh, this is exciting. I'm like,
I wonder what meals she's making. And so so as
I got out of the shower, I put my clothes on,
I come out and I'm like all excited and I'm
looking and I don't see anything, and I'm like, oh,
what did you I thought you were cooking something and
she's like, no, I was just emptying the dishwasher. And
I was like, oh, you got my hopes up. And

(39:55):
then she made a pun and she goes, yeah, I'm
a cook tease and it's dude, I've done it and
it's gotten last. I'm like, that's a real story. It
really is something funny and it's you know, boom, there
it is.

Speaker 2 (40:09):
You know, it's a really good one.

Speaker 1 (40:10):
Yeah, it's a good one, right, and especially on that
that you know, it's it's clever and it's cute. And
you know, we came up with another one about getting
lost in the corn Maze because I went to the
corn Maze one last time, like like October thirtieth or something.

Speaker 2 (40:29):
Else, this last activity.

Speaker 1 (40:32):
Yeah, the last most recent bumpkin activity. And uh, and
each year I come up, I have this bit about
corn Maze and Halloween and it continues to grow each year.
And this year I was actually I had my wherewithal
to start doing it like in you know, September, as
opposed to usually I don't remember to do my Halloween

(40:53):
bit till like the day of Halloween, and then I
keep doing it till like January. Hey, New Year's is great,
but what about Halloween.

Speaker 2 (41:01):
Yeah, so I hang on to my Halloween bits almost
all year round, like I'll start up again in February.

Speaker 1 (41:08):
Exactly because they're great, right, and then they you know,
of course, you know I really wasn't doing the Halloween
bits in you know, Quarantine for two years. So anyways,
the joke is on this one. Uh, it's like a
silly because that the whole bit is about puns where
I'm like they get lost in the corn Maze they
called no nine to one one, which is a true story,

(41:29):
and then I have the I pretend that the lady
is like calling nine one one and she's like, where
the corn Maze? And with my boyfriend Cornelius, we're from
the Silicrn Valley. We feel like we're being stalked. I mean,
it's really it's fun to do, and it's silly and
it's totally one hundred percent clean and uh. And so
this time the new bit that we added on to
it was remember they're in that frame of puns, so

(41:53):
they're not really groaning, they're usually laughing.

Speaker 2 (41:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (41:56):
Go, I never get lost anymore because now I use
an app called Ways, and they kind of laugh because
it sounds stupid. I go, no, it's for the corn Maze.
It's called Cornways, and it's so dumb that it's like
they're already in the zone of that. It's like Cornways.

Speaker 2 (42:10):
But yeah, but ridiculous.

Speaker 1 (42:12):
But if I saw somebody like doing that, I'd be like, dude,
I came up with that on the way to Tappier
Brothers on the one oh one.

Speaker 2 (42:19):
You know.

Speaker 1 (42:21):
Yeah, I like how I say I came up with it.
I think I came up with with my wife shout
out to.

Speaker 2 (42:25):
My Are you concerned that someone is going to steal
the cornwaves?

Speaker 1 (42:31):
I just want this to be documented in cakes. Anyone
out there has any big ideas.

Speaker 2 (42:36):
I don't want you stressing out about this too much.

Speaker 1 (42:39):
It's maybe I'll be on Lucy Case sitcom and we
can talk about it in the locker room.

Speaker 2 (42:44):
Right.

Speaker 1 (42:44):
Yeah, Hey, Louis, we both do a cornmiz.

Speaker 2 (42:46):
You can always register the joke with the writers.

Speaker 1 (42:49):
Guilt one thousand dollars.

Speaker 2 (42:53):
No, it's actually cheap. It's like twenty bucks. Your whole
act pretty much, you know.

Speaker 1 (42:58):
I like, there's this comedian he's really funny. He did
the podcast before, and he's really big on the on
like corporate gigs and like the Midwest. He sells out everywhere.
His name is uh. You might not know him, but
do you know ever heard of Greg han.

Speaker 2 (43:12):
Uh?

Speaker 1 (43:13):
No, Greg Hanya. He's not a he's not a comedy
store guy, but like this guy big on the Bob
and Tom Show. And just like in fact, we were
in that movie together that's going to be coming out
with Paul Rodriguez and and all the guys. Danny Trejoll. Yeah,
we both play prison guards and he's he's hilarious. But anyways,
he does it. He does this really silly, over the

(43:33):
top stuff. Like one of the bits he does is
like when the cops come up to your car and
he has like a non alcoholic beer on stage and
he literally pours it over his head and he's like, hello, officer,
and he like pours it over his head and he's like,
I mean, he's just so over the top, silly and goofy.
But then one of the things that he's one of
the things that I'm laughing because I can picture him
where he talks about going to the gym and he

(43:54):
likes to because I like to chalk up. I like
to chalk up. And then he starts slapping his hands
and he acts like like chalk is a big cloud
all around him and and then he just does all
this silly, goofy crazy shit and then and then then
he stops and gets deadly serious and he goes, nobody's
stealing my ship. And then he goes by yeah, because

(44:16):
it's like, yeah, nobody wants to steal your your corn
maze joke and your cornway's joke.

Speaker 2 (44:21):
Right then he busts out his flashlights.

Speaker 1 (44:24):
Oh damn it, Yeah, we both have flashlights. Can we listen?
You do the flashlight bit when you're in town, I'll
do when I'm on the road, right. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (44:35):
Well that's what happened to a lot of guys is
they'd go on the road and realize that they're act
had already been there, you know, oh yeah, and like
nobody's laughing, They're like, oh, we've heard all these jokes.

Speaker 1 (44:46):
I will say this. I told my son, I go listen.
If you ever want to do any of my jokes,
do them. Go for it, man, please, like father and son,
you go for it.

Speaker 2 (44:52):
I don't care like it's gonna be like Gallagher.

Speaker 1 (44:55):
I know, Galligher one, Gallagher two.

Speaker 2 (44:58):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (44:58):
Yeah. But my son's a musician, so that's great. He's
got quote unquote realty.

Speaker 2 (45:03):
A bunch of people. The baseballs is hilarious.

Speaker 1 (45:09):
My own son, my own son, he's selling out and
now I'm opening for him. But here's a new beat
that I came up with. I'm gonna shart with you
ready he goes like this, He goes, thank you, thank you,

(45:30):
You're welcome.

Speaker 2 (45:31):
I don't know what to do after.

Speaker 1 (45:34):
You don't have to do when a man shares it
when one man.

Speaker 2 (45:37):
I've never had someone share a beat with me before.
I don't know the etiquette, dude, that was.

Speaker 1 (45:44):
I actually was so into that beat, like I came
up with so I was. I literally like was doing
it at home and then I had to go to
the mall and I was in my car with the
radio off, just doing my own beat for about two miles.
I was it stopped by and everything. I was like, wow,
is this guy playing with the you know, like.

Speaker 2 (46:06):
This is really good I'm doing.

Speaker 1 (46:10):
And my son started doing it, and then I think that, uh,
And that's the thing. There's audiences appreciate it, but the
ones that you live with sometimes don't as much.

Speaker 2 (46:19):
Well I can see that being a problem. Yeah.

Speaker 1 (46:25):
I even tell the audience like, it's cool in small doses,
but try being with this for twenty five years. Just
brush your teeth, Darren, stop it please already. Yeah, man,
I it's so good to have this computer back, knowing
that that we can actually get this this episode out there.

(46:46):
Oh man.

Speaker 2 (46:47):
Yeah, Like I'm glad we don't reference a lot of
stuff that's like current events.

Speaker 1 (46:52):
Yeah, I know, like the previous one. We're like, well,
the computer's in the shop, and I know Halloween's coming up,
and now we're like, uh yeah, exactly what if we're like, boy,
this election will come up in two weeks.

Speaker 2 (47:03):
And we're like yeah, yeah.

Speaker 1 (47:05):
Yeah that's and one way that's good to kind of Yeah.

Speaker 2 (47:08):
I bet it'll go just as everyone planned it.

Speaker 1 (47:10):
Yeah, I know, yuh the I was gonna say that
it feels good to have the computer back doing podcasts again.
I I don't know, man, Like, I know you don't
have a computer, so you don't really you wouldn't miss
it if yours wasn't working, but maybe like your phone,
Let's say your phone was in the shop and you

(47:30):
didn't have a phone for like seven days, it'd be weird. Dude,
it's so weird.

Speaker 2 (47:34):
Oh yeah, well, anytime my phone is charging, where like
if I leave it said charge and go do other stuff.
It amazes me how often I think, oh, I'll just
check my phone. Oh right, it's in the other room.
It's right, Like I'm basically lobotomized without it at this point.
I'm I would say I'm about ninety nine percent dumber

(47:58):
when I don't have access.

Speaker 1 (48:00):
I know, No, it's true. It's like, uh, I was.
I was looking up some movie clips. Let's we'll talk
about Christmas vacation in a little bit and uh and
then my computer last night and I was like, oh wait, oh,
so I'm watching it on my phone. Have my phone
on the tripod. Usually what I do is I'll have
a YouTube video playing, and as it's sort of playing,

(48:22):
I'm looking at my phone and looking at updates. And
I realized, oh, I can't do that because the thing
that I'm watching is right in front of me, and
I don't have a phone to Yeah. Yeah, I remember
one time I had my phone in the shop for
a couple of hours. Luckily they fixed it within two hours,
like the face was cracked or whatever. I broke, you know,
one of my phones back in the day, same thing.

(48:43):
I'm like, wow, I'm just like twiddling my thumbs, like
what do I do? Like there's nothing, There's no they
didn't have anything to read. I was just like staring
at like boxes of phones, like, oh, what's this phone do?

Speaker 2 (48:54):
Like you know, oh yeah yeah. And people aren't equipped
to deal with that in society anymore. It's like we're
all such worker ants to that sort of thing that
like if you've ever broken your phone and had to
get it replaced. Yeah, if you tell someone, oh I
broke my phone. I need to get it replaced. Oh

(49:15):
well just call this number I broke my phone. Oh well,
you can go to their website too. My phone is broken.
Well you could download the app. None of what you're
saying makes sense with my problem.

Speaker 1 (49:31):
You know, you know, I realized, like they have to
have a I love it when they have a gentle demeanor.
Like at that that Mac bookstore, the lady was really like,
you know, unless she's faking it, she probably is, but whatever,
she seemed concerned and she seemed helpful, like she's like
you know what.

Speaker 2 (49:49):
I mean, Like she seemed might be faking it. Yeah,
that waitress at Hooters really likes me.

Speaker 1 (49:57):
She seemed like she really seemed concerned. Am I well being?

Speaker 2 (50:01):
And I think we might have a future together.

Speaker 1 (50:04):
I'm gonna get her a kitty beer. Welcome to Reasons.
I remember that episode of South Park. Is Tiffany here,
They've got her a kitty beer. Yeah, because she's like yeah,
She's like, oh, you're gonna need your Apple ID, and
I'm like, Apple, I D I don't even have an
Apple ID. That's how dumb I am. And she's like,

(50:25):
everyone has to have an Apple idea. I'm like, well
I don't have one. I don't have one. And she's like, well,
it'll be usually it's attached to an email, and I'm
like and then she told me and then so we
figured it out and I was like, oh, thank goodness,
all right, oh this is great.

Speaker 2 (50:42):
Like eventually it'll be a barcode on your fortead I know, right.

Speaker 1 (50:47):
So I went in there today to get the computer,
and the guy ahead of me he was she was
helping him, and it was hilarious. He just straight upset it.
He goes, he's like, yeah, because I called the Apple
store or my Apple representative and they just sent me
in circles. He might have been Russian actually, because I'm
I'm making him sound like way more American. This guy

(51:08):
was just a matter of fact. He's like, he goes like,
how do you say it again? He goes, and the
guy on he goes, and the guy on the phone
he was good thing, very sassy with me when she
said and like he said that, and then she couldn't
help but like laugh and I actually laughed too, because
it just has I know exactly what he meant. He
goes very sassy with me, and for fifteen minutes he

(51:29):
started lecturing me about how he should be backing this
up and backing that up. And I was like, oh
my gosh. You know when yeah, like when they're telling
you you need to your phone doesn't work and you
need to go to this website and you need to.
You don't need you want You don't want anyone sassy
or snarky.

Speaker 2 (51:44):
Yeah, And you don't want advice for time travelers, you know, life.
All of this should have been covered when I got
the phone. You should have told me you're gonna need
to back everything up, yeah, because our products sucked.

Speaker 1 (51:58):
Yeah, And this guy told me or not he didn't
tell me, but I overheard it. He apparently what happened
is he had Apple Care and when he got his
new computer, they wrote down the serial number to his
previous computer and his previous thing, and they goofed up.
They put the wrong information to his new computer. And

(52:18):
he wasn't lying because they're like, oh, your computer is
from twenty twenty one, but it says here they serviced
it in twenty twenty. That doesn't even She's like, oh,
he inputed the wrong information on the wrong and that's
what I'm saying, human error.

Speaker 2 (52:33):
You know, yeah, yeah, it could be terrifying, but you know,
get stuff like that wrong.

Speaker 1 (52:42):
By the way, I was going to say, I know
we are skipping around on speaking of holidays and we
this is not really a timestamp because I'm going in
the future. But I do love I got to tell you,
I know Thanksgiving is not here yet, but I don't
know if it's because the COVID shutdown or whatever. I
really appreciate Christmas, man, I really do. I feel like
the colors are bright. I love the music. I love

(53:04):
everything about it. I love the I just love it.
I like even my son as it's the base boss.
Yesterday he was saying, you know, cause his first one
of the first things he does. You know, they're outside
in the morning and it's Sonny and he goes like, goes, Dad,
I like when it's sunny outside and the sky is
blue and it's but it's cold. He goes, it reminds

(53:26):
me of Christmas time. And I'm like, yeah, you know,
And so I was. I was fulling with the radio
station Sirius XM, and I think November one, they started
playing holiday traditions, and I'm like, dude, I'm all in.
I used to be like one of those people that's like, nah,
I don't listen to Christmas music till the week of.
But I'm like, especially now I'm on this Frank Sinatra kick,

(53:49):
I can really appreciate, like you know, Andy Williams and
some of those classic Christmas songs and singers.

Speaker 2 (53:56):
And Target has been getting everyone horny for Christmas the
past two weeks. You know, yeah, they don't mess around, right,
you know, they're like, aren't you excited about christ Christmas? Christmas?
They're super into. But they were like doing the same
thing for Halloween. Yeah, in June, you know, the exactly

(54:19):
Halloween's coming, aren't you excited?

Speaker 1 (54:22):
It's true, right, Like I saw like even you know,
Starbucks has their holiday traditions. They're drinks and the you know,
they're like F's pumpkin spice latte. Now we're all about
peppermint Mocha's. You know. Yeah, but I'm into it though.
I'm like, I'm not going to resist it. I love it.
It's like I just like, I think it's a great message.
It makes me feel good. Like today I was listening

(54:44):
to Paul Inca, and uh, I forget the song. But
Paul Inca is interesting. He did you know that he
wrote my Way Frank Sinatra's My Way, No, I did
it my Way. Yeah, I gets the music was like
an Italian music or it was another. But he came

(55:05):
up with English lyrics to my Way. And he also
wrote the Tonight's Show theme song and he wrote, like,
the guy's just amazing Paul Inca. Anyway, so I'm listening
to this Christmas song and I'm listening to him. It
sounds like he's ad libbing some songs and or add
libbing some lines in the song. It was, it was,
it was just great. It was so cool. I love
the Christmas stuff. Anyway. So the other night, I'm channel

(55:28):
surfing and I saw the last twenty two minutes of
Christmas Vacation with Chevy Chase, and man, it's so funny.
That movie holds up. I could watch it every year.

Speaker 2 (55:37):
And yeah, so the third one in the series, you know,
usually those are kind of lackluster, but.

Speaker 1 (55:47):
Oh wow, I didn't know that so good.

Speaker 2 (55:50):
You know, like the third movie in any series is
kind of like, you know, it's okay, but that one,
the one they had done before was European Bastion, which
was pretty good, but this one was like they were like, okay,
what made the original great and they captured all of that,

(56:12):
got the Christmas theme into it. Randy Quaid was really good,
his whole part in there, the whole all the relatives
were really funny. It was set up so well, you know,
and and that character you get some of it in
that first movie, but it really hit home in this

(56:34):
one of the dad who's just trying to make his
family happy.

Speaker 1 (56:39):
Oh man, I know.

Speaker 2 (56:41):
It hit so perfectly in that movie. And and like
the harder he tries, the more it blows up in
his face. It like you just you're rooting for that
character so hard through the whole thing. You know.

Speaker 1 (57:00):
It's so good, it's so fun. I did not know
that it came out in eighty nine. I didn't realize
it was a third movie. I just I think that's
the first one that really got my attention.

Speaker 2 (57:08):
Yeah, yeah, yeah. The original is fantastic, National Lampoon's Vacation
is a tremendous movie, and then the second one was
so so. But that last one, or the last one
of that series was really good. Christmas Vacation.

Speaker 1 (57:26):
Yeah, see, I think, yeah, I know, I've seen one
in three.

Speaker 2 (57:30):
I think this is Vegas. Vegas Vacation was pretty good. Oh.

Speaker 1 (57:34):
I like that one.

Speaker 2 (57:35):
Yeah, and then they did a reboot kind of where
it's the guy from the Office. I can't remember his
name right now, but he's playing like the young Griswold,
but they had them as the grandparents, Chevy Chase and
Beverly de'angelo. Yeah, and that was a pretty fun movie too.

Speaker 1 (57:54):
I I like that one too, only because it's, you know,
the vibe. I was like, Okay, I know what I'm
getting into it. I know it's not going to be
the original, but let's just enjoy and have some laughs.
And I thought it was funny. But you know, it's
not as good as the originals. But I still had
a good time watching it.

Speaker 2 (58:08):
Oh yeah, same here the original. I love the whole
concept of it is that they're basically taking a trip
to Disneyland there, you know, but it's Wally World in
the movie, you know. Yeah, but that they when they
get there, it's closed, and it's like, oh man, that
would be the worst thing that could happen. And how
he just kind of snaps when that happens. What a great,

(58:34):
great concept for the finale of the movie that he
takes the security guard hostage and makes them take him
around riding rides at gunpoint. Was like, that's so insane,
but so like anyone who's ever been on a long
road trip with their family, Yeah, would be at that

(58:57):
mental state where that's a possibility. You know, if you
got to Disneyland and it was closed after like three
or four days of driving.

Speaker 1 (59:07):
By the way, I like, I like that line where
he goes, uh, he says something like, uh, we're we're
gonna have the happy, happiest Christmasin's Bing Crosby tap Dance
with Danny fucking Gay.

Speaker 2 (59:21):
Yeah. Yeah, when his character loses it, it's so good.
And Chevy Chase is such a brilliant writer and improviser
and stuff like that. But uh, and and not only that,
he's so good at delivery. Yeah, that it's just this
full culmination of rage that just about anyone has been through,

(59:45):
you know, so good.

Speaker 1 (59:48):
So good, and and and when he does that monologue
where he says something like he wishes somebody would you know,
kidnap my boss. And and then you look at cousin
Eddie and you're like, oh, he's just the guy to.

Speaker 2 (59:59):
Do Yeah, sneaks out to go do it.

Speaker 1 (01:00:03):
Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:00:04):
He was great in the first one too. It's so funny. Oh,
Like it's just this weird relative that everyone's got, one
of those, you know, I.

Speaker 1 (01:00:16):
Can't wait to watch it again. Like I said, I
only saw the last twenty two twenty three minutes of it,
and I'm like, oh, I love this movie and every
character and so good. Oh, Mike, real quick. I was
gonna say, as I was looking for my passwords, I
found this, uh because I you know, I was like, well,
let me keep him in a notebook. And I found
another book and this is one of those books that

(01:00:38):
I got where I'm It's called My Top Ten. And
it's one of these things a journal like to help
you write, like you know, you write down your top
ten you know whatever, like lists of things. Not that Oh,
this would be good for the podcast, like just asking
you know, I got it a couple of years ago,
asking guests, you know, like random questions. So I'm gonna
just flip through the pages randomly. Here we go, and uh,

(01:01:02):
instead of saying top I'm not going to make you
name ten things but this might Uh do you wear it?
Says your top ten perfumes or colognes? Do you have
a perfume or cologne that you prefer? Yes or no
or maybe.

Speaker 2 (01:01:14):
Or whatever body spray is on sale?

Speaker 1 (01:01:19):
Oh wow, that's cool. See I don't. I'm not married
to any perfumer Colonne. I just use scented soaps, I guess.

Speaker 2 (01:01:26):
Uh.

Speaker 1 (01:01:26):
Favorite way to pamper yourself.

Speaker 2 (01:01:30):
Oh that's a good one. Probably a nice meal, though
it shouldn't be, you know, but yeah, if I go
to someplace really nice to eat, that's a good one.
Or getting a foot massage interesting at the mall.

Speaker 1 (01:01:50):
Yeah, that's funny. I've never done that. How long do
they do that? How long do they massage a person's feet?
Ten minutes?

Speaker 2 (01:01:56):
However long you pay them to do it. Basically you
know you can stay there all day if you've got
that kind of money. That's hilarious for me. Ten bucks,
I think for like ten bucks, you get ten minutes.
It's not it's they're making a great living, I think.

Speaker 1 (01:02:14):
But do you think we should ever do a podcast?
And and you're the one.

Speaker 2 (01:02:18):
Walk around a lot, and so I get paining a lot.

Speaker 1 (01:02:21):
So maybe that could be a podcast where I'm interviewing
you as you're getting your feet massaged and we'll get on.

Speaker 2 (01:02:26):
Hey, if you pay for it, I'm all for it.

Speaker 1 (01:02:29):
Like, hey, guys, this is our latest vlog. It's called
Pampering Mic.

Speaker 2 (01:02:33):
Mike was happy to do three hours of podcasting.

Speaker 1 (01:02:37):
He's like, Darren, keep going and more questions from your
little book. Yeah. Yeah.

Speaker 2 (01:02:41):
The the problem is I'm also ticklish, and so like
when they already this giggling to it, just and oh god,
you don't want my feet on camera and there they've
been through the mill.

Speaker 1 (01:02:57):
Oh yeah, well we'll zoom out, we won't get.

Speaker 2 (01:02:59):
Too yeah, but like crop out.

Speaker 1 (01:03:01):
I even did a podcast once at a comedian's apartment
and we were like on the couch and I had
the camera set up across the way and he's on
one end of the couch. I'm on the other. And
I realized he was barefoot, and I was like, hey, buddy,
you mind putting some socks on? Like just uh, I go,
and he goes, what do you mean? I go, No, Guys,
you know, it's kind of we don't want to distract.

(01:03:22):
We don't want it's kind of gross looking. People don't
want to see feet. You know.

Speaker 2 (01:03:26):
Yeah, I'm like, and there's some people that really really
do want to see feet and we don't really want
them exactly.

Speaker 1 (01:03:33):
They're gonna be, Yeah, that's gonna be. They're gonna be
doing TikTok's all about your feet.

Speaker 2 (01:03:38):
Uh, not a kink, shame anyone out there, but that's
not the audience.

Speaker 1 (01:03:42):
Yeah, exactly. What about children's books? Do you have a
favorite children's book?

Speaker 2 (01:03:48):
Oh? When I was a kid, I was real into
a book called Finicula, which was a the story of
a vampire bunny. Why as children's books go, I thought
that one was a lot of fun. But I guess
my favorite, if I had to pick one, would have
been Where the Sidewalk Ends. Oh, yeah, Stein, he's great. Yeah,

(01:04:14):
I love that. They also had like scary stories to
tell in the dark, and they were all it was
just like a collection of ghost stories.

Speaker 1 (01:04:24):
And oh, I just thought, have an idea, Probably too
hard to do, but what if it was the scary
stories to tell in the dark and the pages were
all glow in the dark, or the words so you
have to read it in the dark.

Speaker 2 (01:04:37):
I guess.

Speaker 1 (01:04:38):
Hey, on another subject, here's a new beat. I came
up with.

Speaker 2 (01:04:45):
Thank you.

Speaker 1 (01:04:45):
You're welcome. You got a Mike black Man, thank you,
thank you very much. All Right, your next let me
see your next dessert. Let's say you haven't had dessert
for the next week and then you finally get dessert.
Do you go cake or do you go pie.

Speaker 2 (01:04:58):
Pie? Because ice cream is involved. I like it if
it's like a good like fruit sort of pie, like
cherry pie or something like that.

Speaker 1 (01:05:09):
Last question, and your favorite thing about your city. The
favorite thing about Los Angeles.

Speaker 2 (01:05:18):
Oh, man, that is a tough one. Uh, there's I
guess my favorite thing would be that we have a
lot of revival cinema, meaning there's a lot of old
movies that play on a big screen all over town.
Like I you know, I just saw Playing Strings and Automobiles.

(01:05:40):
I told you about that.

Speaker 1 (01:05:41):
Oh you actually saw in the movie theater.

Speaker 2 (01:05:43):
Yeah, dude, last night I saw a Blade Runner at
the Chinese Theater and I'm ex wow and not. There
are other cities that offer that here and there, but
we pretty much every night of the week you can
see a classic on big screen if you set your
mind to it.

Speaker 1 (01:06:02):
You know, Wow, how did you find uh, how did
you find out about the Planes, Trains and Automobiles.

Speaker 2 (01:06:09):
Ah, how did I find out about that?

Speaker 1 (01:06:12):
I mean, is there like a like it was?

Speaker 2 (01:06:15):
Yeah, like Fandango. You can just in the morning just
look on Fandango at your favorite theaters and it'll have like,
uh if there's like a special event movie like that.
But the place to find out the most, I think
is New Beverly their website because they do showings every

(01:06:37):
day of it's usually double features.

Speaker 1 (01:06:40):
It is that Quentin Tarantino's movie.

Speaker 2 (01:06:43):
Yeah, it's his movie theater. Yeah, and they showed two
movies for I think eleven bucks. And they have great concessions,
the cool little theater, but yeah, they're there are theaters
like that all over town.

Speaker 1 (01:07:00):
Let me ask you about Planes, Trains and Automobiles. For
some reason, I didn't know you were in a theater
watching it.

Speaker 2 (01:07:05):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (01:07:05):
What was it expensive to go see?

Speaker 2 (01:07:09):
Uh No, I think it was like normal movie.

Speaker 1 (01:07:12):
Price, like less than fifteen bucks.

Speaker 2 (01:07:15):
I think, so, Yeah, that's so cool.

Speaker 1 (01:07:17):
And what was the crowd? Was it like a crowded theater?
Was it like like.

Speaker 2 (01:07:21):
I would say, it was about half full. I don't
think they didn't do a lot of advertising for it
or anything like that.

Speaker 1 (01:07:27):
I think it's so cool.

Speaker 2 (01:07:28):
It happened to be the anniversary of the release, and
so that's why it was in theaters that day. And
I think it was the same thing with Blade Runner.
It was like the day that it was released.

Speaker 1 (01:07:41):
I'm asking all the dumbest questions because I should be
asking questions about the movie, and I'm like, and how
was parking? And was the popcorn butter.

Speaker 2 (01:07:49):
That helps people find out about it and stuff like that.
But like, if you have like a moby like let's
say you want to see the Empire Strikes Back on
a big screen, you can set a Google alert for
your town, like of just like Empire strikes Back screening

(01:08:11):
Los Angeles, and then when one comes up, it'll let
you know about it. And so because like seeing it
on a small screen, that's not the way to see
that movie. Yeah, yeah, you know, that's definitely a cinematic
experience that you want to have. And so sometimes you'll
luck out in the movie you'll be playing pretty shortly

(01:08:34):
after you look for it, and other times it may
take two or three years, but they'll play anything like
Garbage Pale Kids might be the worst movie ever made,
but they played it at the New Beverly at a
matinee like two weeks ago.

Speaker 1 (01:08:51):
You know, nobody was there, but they played it.

Speaker 2 (01:08:55):
No people went because they were like, I'm never gonna
get this chance again to see this movie on a
big screen.

Speaker 1 (01:09:01):
That's awesome.

Speaker 2 (01:09:03):
I saw the Muppet Movie there that. Oh the whole
audience was like singing along and everything.

Speaker 1 (01:09:10):
That's awesome. I love stuff like that.

Speaker 2 (01:09:13):
One of the best ones I got to do was
one year, on Arnold's birthday, they did Arnold Schwarzenegger All Night.
Where the deal was it started at seven they were
going to show six Arnold Schwarzenegger movies. So basically until
sun up they were going to show Arnold Schwarzenegger movies.

(01:09:34):
But they didn't tell you which ones they were going
to show, and so you just went into the theater blind.
And they were like, we're gonna show some of his
biggest hits, and we're going to show some that people
would not expect, you know. And they had like little
shorts in between from his career and stuff like that,
and they had you know, specials on coffee. They keep

(01:09:57):
everyone awake and everything. It was a lot of fun.
And then they played like I think the big ones
were Predator and Terminator, but they also did like Kindergarten
cop and Raw Deal, and so it was a good mix.

Speaker 1 (01:10:14):
You know, you're like, I'll be napping for the next
three hours during this movie.

Speaker 2 (01:10:18):
Yeah, yeah, I think bring Raw Deal. I stepped out
and got a sandwich.

Speaker 1 (01:10:24):
Yeah, that's funny. Uh, Mike, It's so great to have
you back on. And you know, let's do this again
because I can actually get these out to the public.
And I want to thank everybody for reviewing and sharing
and and you know, throwing throwing a little tip in
the tip jar and just helping us out, helping this
thing carry on.

Speaker 2 (01:10:42):
Yeah, all the likes, follow shares. That really makes a
difference on independent podcasts like this. So the more of
that you can do, the better share it with anyone,
you know.

Speaker 1 (01:10:52):
Thank you. Mike, will talk soon and let's get this
do this again quicker than we did before. Now we
can do it again. So thank you, absolutely brother, got
it you too, my man. Bye, And that was Mike
Black And thank you guys so much for you know
you look well, look at you. You made it all
the way through. If you want to hit that Venmo

(01:11:12):
and buy us a cup of coffee or help us
with some of our computer offset the cost. You can
do that. All the links are below. Check it out
my venmo is at Darren Carter Comic cash app it's
dollar Sign Darren Carter Comic. Other than that, thank you
guys so much. Get out there, have a great day,
a great week, Happy Thanksgiving and Merry Christmas and Happy

(01:11:35):
New Year. And we'll see you to corn Maze soon
in October and we won't get lost, why because we
have corn waves. All right, guys, lots of love to
see us soon.

Speaker 4 (01:11:46):
Bye, everybody. Listen to Darren Carter. We all know he's
the party starter. So if you want to listen to
a podcast for free, listen to the Pocket Party