August 14, 2025 • 15 mins
Nothing is worse then finding out you have been let go from your job, then to find out your SO is also leaving you but is there really ever a good time for a breakup? Wanna stay connected to the show and follow along with all our stories? Follow us at the Dom with Melissa Facebook page here: Dom With Melissa Facebook Page
Wanna stay connected to the show and follow along with all our stories? Follow us at the Dom with Melissa Facebook page here: Dom With Melissa Facebook Page
Wanna stay connected to the show and follow along with all our stories? Follow us at the Dom with Melissa Facebook page here: Dom With Melissa Facebook Page
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:01):
Dumb in the Morning with Melissa Moore the podcast on
Cool one oh five.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
We got another note from somebody. This just came in
last night, and fortunately we said. Here's the thing, when
you send text messages to us, it's not like they
come into our phone, so like we don't see them
in the afternoon or at night. We only see them
when we come into the studio. So if you want
to text Lallani while she's on the air, that's the
best way to do it, or Jim Barry this afternoon.
(00:30):
But with us, if it's after you know, nine five,
ten am, we usually won't see them until the next day.
But this came in last night. Fortunately we did see it. Says,
please don't use my name. So, Melissa, I'm going to
need a name for her. What do you want to
call her?
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Um, Tish, she says, what Tish should like?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Tish Uh, She says, please don't use my name. I
need advice. Well, Tish, you have come to the right place.
I've been saying for almost a year. But it's just
not right, and I've been planning to end it with him.
Let me scroll down a little bit. In fact, I
decided I would break up this weekend when we're supposed
(01:12):
to have dinner, and then yesterday he lost his job,
she says, So now.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
What do I do?
Speaker 4 (01:20):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Man, she says, I don't want to be a total
jerk right and dump a guy who just got fired,
but I also don't want to stay in a relationship
with him.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
I'd love your advice on this, she says. My friends
are no help.
Speaker 3 (01:35):
No, no, friends are definitely not going to be a help.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Don't use my name, Yeah, right, don't use my name.
So we're going to call her Tish.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
That's good. Oh my goodness.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Okay, this is a timing issue thing, right, we have
to do We have to find out what the perfect
amount of time is.
Speaker 4 (01:53):
No, no, I think you just know. Here's my thing.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
There's never a perfect time to break up, because if
you don't do it now, you're gonna wait, and then
it'd be the holidays, and then you're gonna be like, oh.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Cr all right, god, wait to wait that long?
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Well, no, that's what I'm saying. I mean, what if
this this person doesn't get a job for a while.
So right now, this person just lost their job.
Speaker 4 (02:15):
That's bad.
Speaker 3 (02:16):
But then the other bad part can be when you're
out of a job for a while. Now now what's
bad is getting worse. You know, that person's not feeling
good about themselves. They not only lost a job, they
haven't been able to find one. Next thing, you know,
you're in October, moving towards the holidays, and you're like,
when can I break up?
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Lord?
Speaker 3 (02:33):
No, I mean I get it. Here's the thing. When
you want to break up with somebody, you need to
just do it. And sometimes the timing is not good,
and you can even say I'm so sorry about the timing.
You know, I wanted to talk to you this weekend
and I feel really badly with everything you're going through,
and I realize this is awful timing. I mean, you
can just acknowledge the elephant in the room.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
You know, I kind of agree with you about you know,
if you're going to end it, just inn it, because
she says in here it's just not right. I've been
planning to end it with him.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
Yeah, I'll done.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Say well, you should have just done it. However, there
have been times for many people, not all, but many
people where you feel like you should probably break up
with someone. Then you stick it out and then it
turns really really good and so I can see you
planning to break up and then maybe you're like, oh,
maybe I was just too hasty.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
See, I've never had it go the opposite. When I'm done,
I'm done. And so if I know I want to
break up with somebody.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
Ever gotten back together with someone?
Speaker 3 (03:36):
Yeah, And it was always a it was never good ever,
really no, because when you break up with somebody, there's
a reason why, and if you try to revisit that relationship,
it's just those old reasons always pop up.
Speaker 4 (03:49):
I felt bad.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
I broke up some with somebody one time, and it
was the same day that his ex wife was getting remarried,
and I forgot about that. He goes, really, you're breaking
up with me on the day that my ex wife
is getting married.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
I'm like, I feel really bad.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Now, are heartless?
Speaker 4 (04:04):
Heartless? Heartless?
Speaker 3 (04:06):
And I was like, well, And then I thought I
would try to make it sound better. I go, well,
I really wanted to break up a week ago. That
didn't help. That was not the thing to say.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Micah says, frame it better say quote, losing this job
means a fresh start. And speaking of fresh starts, you're funny.
Speaker 4 (04:25):
That's really funny, you know, what I would do. You
should start fresh everywhere in life.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
There's a new code of paint on on your entire world.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
I would.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
No, because then you're gonna If I would.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Not break up today, I would not do it immediately,
I know, but I just.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
It's just, you know, just tough it out. I think
how long, though, how long? I think two more weeks.
Speaker 4 (04:53):
Is fine, gosh.
Speaker 2 (04:55):
I mean, look, they're not living together probably, so you know,
she says we're supposed to get together and dinner. They
don't even live together, so it's not like she's going
to be around him every.
Speaker 4 (05:03):
Day, I know.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
But in two weeks he may be more depressed about
losing his job than he is today.
Speaker 2 (05:09):
Well okay, well, it's never as bad as like the
day that it happens. That's when you just like, oh
so then you come and have somebody dump on top
of you right at the same time.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
But she's saying she's having dinner with him this weekend,
so it's he let's just say he just lost his
job yesterday or Friday or whatever it was. Okay, there
you go a few days ago and by I'm so sorry, Yeah,
pick up the tab at dinner there, iss right, maybe
don't even probably I told you that was always my thing,
(05:42):
was breaking up at dinner.
Speaker 4 (05:43):
That's not a good idea.
Speaker 2 (05:44):
Just do it before, right, you know, Pat wrote in
he says, be honest, tell him you were planning on
breaking up. Now he can start over fresh with everything,
you know. The only thing is he's not going to
believe that. That's the thing. You can't come back retroactively
and say you know, been planning this for a while.
They'll be like, yeah, sure you waited until I lost
my job, and now you think you know that I
(06:05):
have you know that I'm a loser or something, and
so now you're just bailing on me. That's what hurts with,
like right away thing. So I think you could be
a shoulder to cry on and be supportive because I'm
sure you still feel like this guy is a.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
Friend, Tish, don't you.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
I mean, you're sticking it out with him, so you
probably feel like he's a friend, but it's just not
any more than that. Will so be a friend for
a couple of weeks, even put off, you know, going
out with other people for two more weeks, unless you're
a complete randy.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Goat, Tish. I mean, just weight goat, goat. My god.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
I don't think she's like, hey, I want to get
my groove on with somebody else. That's why she She
just doesn't want to prolong that which she knows is
not going to go anywhere.
Speaker 4 (06:52):
So I say, rip the band aid off. It's been
a few days.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
You're fine, Teresa, says, use the two day rule. Tell
him today. Zech, what's the two day rule?
Speaker 1 (07:02):
What is that?
Speaker 4 (07:02):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
One two punch, Teresa.
Speaker 4 (07:05):
Like two days post something bad, like.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Yeah, you got hit in the jaw yesterday. Here comes
a gut punch now on top of that.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Look, we're assuming, no, we're assuming people. He's gonna be
upset about this. He may be thrilled. This may be
the best news he's heard. He may be like, thank.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
God, I wanted to I'm doing this for him, you
know what. This is just what he wants, right.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
It's not for me, It's for you and you just
start over fresh. That way, if you find a job
in another city, I'm not tying you down. You can
go see.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
You could give him a two week notice, just like
you would with your job. Says Dan from Johnstown.
Speaker 3 (07:44):
I just think it is on the person that has
to act and pretend like they want to, Like she's
already made up her mind. That train has left the station.
It's not coming back, so you can do it kind.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
So instead you would rather run over him. You want
the train to run right over his head.
Speaker 3 (08:03):
I just don't think she should have to do mercy
dating for two weeks.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
God, we've all been there, and I've been on both
ends of that, right, And.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
It doesn't make you feel better when you find out
later they wanted to break up with you sooner, you're like, really,
why didn't you just do it?
Speaker 1 (08:18):
Then?
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Listener of ours has an urgent situation regarding a breakup.
She didn't want us to use her name, so we're
calling her Tish. Apparently this guy that she's been seeing
for almost a year. She says, it's just not right.
I've been planning to end it with him, and then
yesterday he went and lost his job.
Speaker 4 (08:35):
He went and lost his job, liked his fault.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
She says, Now what do I do?
Speaker 2 (08:40):
I don't want to be a total jerk and dump
a guy who just got fired, but I also don't
want to stay in relationship with him.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
I love your advice, she says.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
My friends are no help now, Melissa says, just dump
them immediately, just boom.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
I also said to be sensitive and kind and just
let him know.
Speaker 4 (08:57):
Hey, I know this is not the best.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
Let me here, let's role play.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Okay, so I'm the guy who's just had his life
wrecked by losing a great job and everything. You're my girlfriend.
Let's sit down. So I'll say, hey, Melissa, what's going on.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
I'll be like Dom, I'm like, First off, I've got
to tell you, I'm so sorry that you lost your job.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Oh, thank you. I'm glad you're there for me.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
Yeah, I don't know what I would do without your
shoulder to cry on during this very difficult time.
Speaker 3 (09:24):
Look, we are we are good friends outside of dating,
and I am definitely here for you. But here's the thing,
and I've been I've been wanting to talk to you
about this for a while and this is not great time.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
Want to get married.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
I don't know if I can pay for a ring
right now. I mean, it's I just lost my job.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
And I know we've been together for a year and
it feels like a really long time, and I so
appreciate you as a well, but it's been.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
The best time when do you agree it's been the
best time anyway?
Speaker 1 (09:51):
What's on your mind?
Speaker 4 (09:53):
I got to break up with you?
Speaker 1 (09:54):
It is? It is.
Speaker 4 (09:56):
I don't see this going the distance.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
What so I just lost my job and now you're
going to stomp on my heart?
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (10:05):
Right?
Speaker 2 (10:06):
Is this?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
This is a joke?
Speaker 4 (10:08):
Right, I'm really sorry. I'm so sorry. I know there's
never gonna.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
Be I.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
UF What what You're seriously dumping me when I just
got fired?
Speaker 4 (10:20):
No, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
What about this last year of laughs and fun that
we've had.
Speaker 4 (10:26):
It has been great. It has been great. But you
and I both know.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
Until I lose my job and then I'm not worthy
of you. Is that what you're saying?
Speaker 4 (10:32):
Well, yeah, you're kind of a loser now.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
So I thought I knew it my role playing.
Speaker 4 (10:38):
I got the fact that you were heartbroken was awesome.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
It was heartbroken.
Speaker 4 (10:42):
You were heartbroken.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
No, but that's how it's going to go down. Like
I'm a friend, I care about you. I want you
to do well. You know, hopefully this will give you
a chance at a fresh beginning. That way, if you
get a job offer from somewhere else, I want you
to feel free to pursue it.
Speaker 4 (10:59):
And not have to think about me.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
Hopefully Antarctica, so I can get as far away from
you as possible.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
Uh Amber and Golden wrote in she said, I'd wait
one week and then don't even mention the job thing.
Just say this hasn't been working for me for a while.
That's Amber and Golden. I like Dylan and Broomfield, who said, geez,
give the guy a break. If you've dated him for
a year, another two or three weeks won't kill you.
Speaker 4 (11:26):
See, it could go worse for him.
Speaker 3 (11:28):
What if, in all honesty, what if in those two
weeks Number one, he gets more depressed because he can't
find a job. It's a hard job market right now.
Number two he sees a job in a different state
and he passes up even applying for it, because he
thinks you would.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
You know, you probably mention it to her. And if
that's the case, then she could step forward and say, well, no,
I think you should take that job right.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
Right, and then let the job be the bad guy versus.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
Now I can come out and see you, and then
you never go. You don't know now here.
Speaker 3 (11:58):
Let me help you pack, right, I'll help you pack.
I mean, I'll bring the tape gun the sharpie.
Speaker 4 (12:04):
I'm ready.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
I will say earlier this morning a segment that we
had the vast majority of people agreed with me on
this segment. The vast majority of people agree.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
With you, Melissa.
Speaker 4 (12:13):
That's funny.
Speaker 2 (12:15):
And I think maybe the best text about all this
comes from Jim in Littleton, who says, it's just like
the video game Mortal Kombat.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Finish him. You guys are.
Speaker 4 (12:30):
Ruthless, brutal. That is brutal.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
I know we had so many. I didn't know my
radio partner was so brutal. And then the listeners are
like vicious.
Speaker 4 (12:40):
Well, here's the thing.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
If you stay past the expiration date that you know
that has already been reached in that relationship, it takes
a toll on you as a person. The longer you
stay in a relationship that's that you shouldn't be in
or that you won out of, it does ding away
at you. So you need to ended. And yes, there's
(13:02):
there's some people might call it a little bit selfish.
I think it's all in how you handle it. But
you need don't drag it on. Don't drag it on
when you know you're done, you need to move move on.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
Uh JS wrote in and said, I like this. This
is almost like a therapist.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
Writing into us.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Maybe the guy needs to work on himself if both
his job and his girlfriend don't think he's worth any
more effort.
Speaker 4 (13:24):
Wow. Wow, that's a little brutal.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
You can't say, wow, you have already been vicious and brutal.
Speaker 4 (13:32):
I have it. I have been kind and thoughtful.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
Oh no, no, no, no, see that's where that's where
the perspective on this one is different. I think it
is kind to end things with somebody when it's over,
versus dragging it on. Because how many times and I've
done this, have we stayed in relationships and when we
knew we were done but it just was never the
right time. You didn't want to hurt the person's feelings
(13:55):
it was, and so you just stayed.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
But there's a cost.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Oh, there's a cost to your nobody's signed a name
to this one. Right back and tell us your first name.
We like to know first names. They say, I think
she should break up with them. I mean, especially if
she's been debating about it, because the longer she stays
in it, the harder it's going to be. In the
long run of getting yourself out because you start doubting yourself,
you start seeing the good stuff, but then.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
It goes bad again. And if she really doesn't want
to be in it, she just needs to cut ties.
Speaker 4 (14:25):
Ding it wow ding that sucker? All right, thank you?
Speaker 1 (14:31):
All right?
Speaker 2 (14:32):
So off, I got crushed on this one, just like
Tisha's boyfriend is about to get crushed. So here's my
word of advice for any gentleman listening to the show
who's not married, is listening to the show, has been
dating someone for almost a year. If you've lost your
(14:52):
job in the last well, when'd she say he lost
his job yesterday?
Speaker 4 (14:56):
I don't know it.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
I would have been the day she wrote this last night,
so it would have been the dable. So if you
lost your job on Tuesday and you've been dating someone
for almost a year, don't take their call today.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
When they say we need to talk, don't just take
their call. Just know what's coming. Just know what's coming.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
That's a public service announcement from the member of the
Dom with Melissa show.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
Who does have a heart? Don testa right here? Big heart?
Speaker 2 (15:28):
This heart?
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Yeah, bleeding heart, big hands, big heart.
Speaker 1 (15:33):
No corment.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
Not true on either.
Speaker 1 (15:40):
I know it's not true. Don in the Morning with
Melissa Moore, the podcast on Cool one oh five.
Speaker 2 (15:49):
Subscribe now so you never miss an episode, and learn
more about the show at cool one o five dot com.
Dumb in the Morning with Melissa Moore the podcast on
Cool one oh five.
Speaker 2 (00:08):
We got another note from somebody. This just came in
last night, and fortunately we said. Here's the thing, when
you send text messages to us, it's not like they
come into our phone, so like we don't see them
in the afternoon or at night. We only see them
when we come into the studio. So if you want
to text Lallani while she's on the air, that's the
best way to do it, or Jim Barry this afternoon.
(00:30):
But with us, if it's after you know, nine five,
ten am, we usually won't see them until the next day.
But this came in last night. Fortunately we did see it. Says,
please don't use my name. So, Melissa, I'm going to
need a name for her. What do you want to
call her?
Speaker 3 (00:45):
Um, Tish, she says, what Tish should like?
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Tish Uh, She says, please don't use my name. I
need advice. Well, Tish, you have come to the right place.
I've been saying for almost a year. But it's just
not right, and I've been planning to end it with him.
Let me scroll down a little bit. In fact, I
decided I would break up this weekend when we're supposed
(01:12):
to have dinner, and then yesterday he lost his job,
she says, So now.
Speaker 1 (01:19):
What do I do?
Speaker 4 (01:20):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (01:21):
Man, she says, I don't want to be a total
jerk right and dump a guy who just got fired,
but I also don't want to stay in a relationship
with him.
Speaker 1 (01:31):
I'd love your advice on this, she says. My friends
are no help.
Speaker 3 (01:35):
No, no, friends are definitely not going to be a help.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Don't use my name, Yeah, right, don't use my name.
So we're going to call her Tish.
Speaker 1 (01:43):
That's good. Oh my goodness.
Speaker 2 (01:46):
Okay, this is a timing issue thing, right, we have
to do We have to find out what the perfect
amount of time is.
Speaker 4 (01:53):
No, no, I think you just know. Here's my thing.
Speaker 3 (01:56):
There's never a perfect time to break up, because if
you don't do it now, you're gonna wait, and then
it'd be the holidays, and then you're gonna be like, oh.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Cr all right, god, wait to wait that long?
Speaker 3 (02:07):
Well, no, that's what I'm saying. I mean, what if
this this person doesn't get a job for a while.
So right now, this person just lost their job.
Speaker 4 (02:15):
That's bad.
Speaker 3 (02:16):
But then the other bad part can be when you're
out of a job for a while. Now now what's
bad is getting worse. You know, that person's not feeling
good about themselves. They not only lost a job, they
haven't been able to find one. Next thing, you know,
you're in October, moving towards the holidays, and you're like,
when can I break up?
Speaker 1 (02:33):
Lord?
Speaker 3 (02:33):
No, I mean I get it. Here's the thing. When
you want to break up with somebody, you need to
just do it. And sometimes the timing is not good,
and you can even say I'm so sorry about the timing.
You know, I wanted to talk to you this weekend
and I feel really badly with everything you're going through,
and I realize this is awful timing. I mean, you
can just acknowledge the elephant in the room.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
You know, I kind of agree with you about you know,
if you're going to end it, just inn it, because
she says in here it's just not right. I've been
planning to end it with him.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
Yeah, I'll done.
Speaker 2 (03:06):
Say well, you should have just done it. However, there
have been times for many people, not all, but many
people where you feel like you should probably break up
with someone. Then you stick it out and then it
turns really really good and so I can see you
planning to break up and then maybe you're like, oh,
maybe I was just too hasty.
Speaker 3 (03:27):
See, I've never had it go the opposite. When I'm done,
I'm done. And so if I know I want to
break up with somebody.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
Ever gotten back together with someone?
Speaker 3 (03:36):
Yeah, And it was always a it was never good ever,
really no, because when you break up with somebody, there's
a reason why, and if you try to revisit that relationship,
it's just those old reasons always pop up.
Speaker 4 (03:49):
I felt bad.
Speaker 3 (03:50):
I broke up some with somebody one time, and it
was the same day that his ex wife was getting remarried,
and I forgot about that. He goes, really, you're breaking
up with me on the day that my ex wife
is getting married.
Speaker 4 (04:00):
I'm like, I feel really bad.
Speaker 1 (04:02):
Now, are heartless?
Speaker 4 (04:04):
Heartless? Heartless?
Speaker 3 (04:06):
And I was like, well, And then I thought I
would try to make it sound better. I go, well,
I really wanted to break up a week ago. That
didn't help. That was not the thing to say.
Speaker 1 (04:14):
Uh.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
Micah says, frame it better say quote, losing this job
means a fresh start. And speaking of fresh starts, you're funny.
Speaker 4 (04:25):
That's really funny, you know, what I would do. You
should start fresh everywhere in life.
Speaker 2 (04:31):
There's a new code of paint on on your entire world.
Speaker 1 (04:35):
I would.
Speaker 4 (04:38):
No, because then you're gonna If I would.
Speaker 2 (04:40):
Not break up today, I would not do it immediately,
I know, but I just.
Speaker 1 (04:47):
It's just, you know, just tough it out. I think
how long, though, how long? I think two more weeks.
Speaker 4 (04:53):
Is fine, gosh.
Speaker 2 (04:55):
I mean, look, they're not living together probably, so you know,
she says we're supposed to get together and dinner. They
don't even live together, so it's not like she's going
to be around him every.
Speaker 4 (05:03):
Day, I know.
Speaker 3 (05:05):
But in two weeks he may be more depressed about
losing his job than he is today.
Speaker 2 (05:09):
Well okay, well, it's never as bad as like the
day that it happens. That's when you just like, oh
so then you come and have somebody dump on top
of you right at the same time.
Speaker 3 (05:21):
But she's saying she's having dinner with him this weekend,
so it's he let's just say he just lost his
job yesterday or Friday or whatever it was. Okay, there
you go a few days ago and by I'm so sorry, Yeah,
pick up the tab at dinner there, iss right, maybe
don't even probably I told you that was always my thing,
(05:42):
was breaking up at dinner.
Speaker 4 (05:43):
That's not a good idea.
Speaker 2 (05:44):
Just do it before, right, you know, Pat wrote in
he says, be honest, tell him you were planning on
breaking up. Now he can start over fresh with everything,
you know. The only thing is he's not going to
believe that. That's the thing. You can't come back retroactively
and say you know, been planning this for a while.
They'll be like, yeah, sure you waited until I lost
my job, and now you think you know that I
(06:05):
have you know that I'm a loser or something, and
so now you're just bailing on me. That's what hurts with,
like right away thing. So I think you could be
a shoulder to cry on and be supportive because I'm
sure you still feel like this guy is a.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
Friend, Tish, don't you.
Speaker 2 (06:22):
I mean, you're sticking it out with him, so you
probably feel like he's a friend, but it's just not
any more than that. Will so be a friend for
a couple of weeks, even put off, you know, going
out with other people for two more weeks, unless you're
a complete randy.
Speaker 1 (06:35):
Goat, Tish. I mean, just weight goat, goat. My god.
Speaker 3 (06:42):
I don't think she's like, hey, I want to get
my groove on with somebody else. That's why she She
just doesn't want to prolong that which she knows is
not going to go anywhere.
Speaker 4 (06:52):
So I say, rip the band aid off. It's been
a few days.
Speaker 2 (06:55):
You're fine, Teresa, says, use the two day rule. Tell
him today. Zech, what's the two day rule?
Speaker 1 (07:02):
What is that?
Speaker 4 (07:02):
I don't know.
Speaker 1 (07:03):
One two punch, Teresa.
Speaker 4 (07:05):
Like two days post something bad, like.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
Yeah, you got hit in the jaw yesterday. Here comes
a gut punch now on top of that.
Speaker 3 (07:12):
Look, we're assuming, no, we're assuming people. He's gonna be
upset about this. He may be thrilled. This may be
the best news he's heard. He may be like, thank.
Speaker 1 (07:21):
God, I wanted to I'm doing this for him, you
know what. This is just what he wants, right.
Speaker 4 (07:27):
It's not for me, It's for you and you just
start over fresh. That way, if you find a job
in another city, I'm not tying you down. You can
go see.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
You could give him a two week notice, just like
you would with your job. Says Dan from Johnstown.
Speaker 3 (07:44):
I just think it is on the person that has
to act and pretend like they want to, Like she's
already made up her mind. That train has left the station.
It's not coming back, so you can do it kind.
Speaker 2 (07:57):
So instead you would rather run over him. You want
the train to run right over his head.
Speaker 3 (08:03):
I just don't think she should have to do mercy
dating for two weeks.
Speaker 2 (08:08):
God, we've all been there, and I've been on both
ends of that, right, And.
Speaker 3 (08:12):
It doesn't make you feel better when you find out
later they wanted to break up with you sooner, you're like, really,
why didn't you just do it?
Speaker 1 (08:18):
Then?
Speaker 2 (08:18):
Listener of ours has an urgent situation regarding a breakup.
She didn't want us to use her name, so we're
calling her Tish. Apparently this guy that she's been seeing
for almost a year. She says, it's just not right.
I've been planning to end it with him, and then
yesterday he went and lost his job.
Speaker 4 (08:35):
He went and lost his job, liked his fault.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
She says, Now what do I do?
Speaker 2 (08:40):
I don't want to be a total jerk and dump
a guy who just got fired, but I also don't
want to stay in relationship with him.
Speaker 1 (08:45):
I love your advice, she says.
Speaker 2 (08:47):
My friends are no help now, Melissa says, just dump
them immediately, just boom.
Speaker 3 (08:51):
I also said to be sensitive and kind and just
let him know.
Speaker 4 (08:57):
Hey, I know this is not the best.
Speaker 1 (08:59):
Let me here, let's role play.
Speaker 2 (09:01):
Okay, so I'm the guy who's just had his life
wrecked by losing a great job and everything. You're my girlfriend.
Let's sit down. So I'll say, hey, Melissa, what's going on.
Speaker 3 (09:11):
I'll be like Dom, I'm like, First off, I've got
to tell you, I'm so sorry that you lost your job.
Speaker 1 (09:16):
Oh, thank you. I'm glad you're there for me.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
Yeah, I don't know what I would do without your
shoulder to cry on during this very difficult time.
Speaker 3 (09:24):
Look, we are we are good friends outside of dating,
and I am definitely here for you. But here's the thing,
and I've been I've been wanting to talk to you
about this for a while and this is not great time.
Speaker 1 (09:35):
Want to get married.
Speaker 2 (09:36):
I don't know if I can pay for a ring
right now. I mean, it's I just lost my job.
Speaker 3 (09:40):
And I know we've been together for a year and
it feels like a really long time, and I so
appreciate you as a well, but it's been.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
The best time when do you agree it's been the
best time anyway?
Speaker 1 (09:51):
What's on your mind?
Speaker 4 (09:53):
I got to break up with you?
Speaker 1 (09:54):
It is? It is.
Speaker 4 (09:56):
I don't see this going the distance.
Speaker 1 (09:59):
What so I just lost my job and now you're
going to stomp on my heart?
Speaker 2 (10:04):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (10:05):
Right?
Speaker 2 (10:06):
Is this?
Speaker 1 (10:07):
This is a joke?
Speaker 4 (10:08):
Right, I'm really sorry. I'm so sorry. I know there's
never gonna.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
Be I.
Speaker 2 (10:15):
UF What what You're seriously dumping me when I just
got fired?
Speaker 4 (10:20):
No, I'm so sorry.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
What about this last year of laughs and fun that
we've had.
Speaker 4 (10:26):
It has been great. It has been great. But you
and I both know.
Speaker 1 (10:29):
Until I lose my job and then I'm not worthy
of you. Is that what you're saying?
Speaker 4 (10:32):
Well, yeah, you're kind of a loser now.
Speaker 1 (10:34):
So I thought I knew it my role playing.
Speaker 4 (10:38):
I got the fact that you were heartbroken was awesome.
Speaker 1 (10:41):
It was heartbroken.
Speaker 4 (10:42):
You were heartbroken.
Speaker 3 (10:45):
No, but that's how it's going to go down. Like
I'm a friend, I care about you. I want you
to do well. You know, hopefully this will give you
a chance at a fresh beginning. That way, if you
get a job offer from somewhere else, I want you
to feel free to pursue it.
Speaker 4 (10:59):
And not have to think about me.
Speaker 1 (11:01):
Hopefully Antarctica, so I can get as far away from
you as possible.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
Uh Amber and Golden wrote in she said, I'd wait
one week and then don't even mention the job thing.
Just say this hasn't been working for me for a while.
That's Amber and Golden. I like Dylan and Broomfield, who said, geez,
give the guy a break. If you've dated him for
a year, another two or three weeks won't kill you.
Speaker 4 (11:26):
See, it could go worse for him.
Speaker 3 (11:28):
What if, in all honesty, what if in those two
weeks Number one, he gets more depressed because he can't
find a job. It's a hard job market right now.
Number two he sees a job in a different state
and he passes up even applying for it, because he
thinks you would.
Speaker 2 (11:42):
You know, you probably mention it to her. And if
that's the case, then she could step forward and say, well, no,
I think you should take that job right.
Speaker 4 (11:49):
Right, and then let the job be the bad guy versus.
Speaker 1 (11:52):
Now I can come out and see you, and then
you never go. You don't know now here.
Speaker 3 (11:58):
Let me help you pack, right, I'll help you pack.
I mean, I'll bring the tape gun the sharpie.
Speaker 4 (12:04):
I'm ready.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
I will say earlier this morning a segment that we
had the vast majority of people agreed with me on
this segment. The vast majority of people agree.
Speaker 1 (12:12):
With you, Melissa.
Speaker 4 (12:13):
That's funny.
Speaker 2 (12:15):
And I think maybe the best text about all this
comes from Jim in Littleton, who says, it's just like
the video game Mortal Kombat.
Speaker 1 (12:27):
Finish him. You guys are.
Speaker 4 (12:30):
Ruthless, brutal. That is brutal.
Speaker 2 (12:33):
I know we had so many. I didn't know my
radio partner was so brutal. And then the listeners are
like vicious.
Speaker 4 (12:40):
Well, here's the thing.
Speaker 3 (12:41):
If you stay past the expiration date that you know
that has already been reached in that relationship, it takes
a toll on you as a person. The longer you
stay in a relationship that's that you shouldn't be in
or that you won out of, it does ding away
at you. So you need to ended. And yes, there's
(13:02):
there's some people might call it a little bit selfish.
I think it's all in how you handle it. But
you need don't drag it on. Don't drag it on
when you know you're done, you need to move move on.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
Uh JS wrote in and said, I like this. This
is almost like a therapist.
Speaker 1 (13:16):
Writing into us.
Speaker 2 (13:17):
Maybe the guy needs to work on himself if both
his job and his girlfriend don't think he's worth any
more effort.
Speaker 4 (13:24):
Wow. Wow, that's a little brutal.
Speaker 1 (13:27):
You can't say, wow, you have already been vicious and brutal.
Speaker 4 (13:32):
I have it. I have been kind and thoughtful.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
Oh no, no, no, no, see that's where that's where
the perspective on this one is different. I think it
is kind to end things with somebody when it's over,
versus dragging it on. Because how many times and I've
done this, have we stayed in relationships and when we
knew we were done but it just was never the
right time. You didn't want to hurt the person's feelings
(13:55):
it was, and so you just stayed.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
But there's a cost.
Speaker 2 (14:00):
Oh, there's a cost to your nobody's signed a name
to this one. Right back and tell us your first name.
We like to know first names. They say, I think
she should break up with them. I mean, especially if
she's been debating about it, because the longer she stays
in it, the harder it's going to be. In the
long run of getting yourself out because you start doubting yourself,
you start seeing the good stuff, but then.
Speaker 1 (14:21):
It goes bad again. And if she really doesn't want
to be in it, she just needs to cut ties.
Speaker 4 (14:25):
Ding it wow ding that sucker? All right, thank you?
Speaker 1 (14:31):
All right?
Speaker 2 (14:32):
So off, I got crushed on this one, just like
Tisha's boyfriend is about to get crushed. So here's my
word of advice for any gentleman listening to the show
who's not married, is listening to the show, has been
dating someone for almost a year. If you've lost your
(14:52):
job in the last well, when'd she say he lost
his job yesterday?
Speaker 4 (14:56):
I don't know it.
Speaker 2 (14:57):
I would have been the day she wrote this last night,
so it would have been the dable. So if you
lost your job on Tuesday and you've been dating someone
for almost a year, don't take their call today.
Speaker 3 (15:10):
When they say we need to talk, don't just take
their call. Just know what's coming. Just know what's coming.
Speaker 2 (15:18):
That's a public service announcement from the member of the
Dom with Melissa show.
Speaker 1 (15:23):
Who does have a heart? Don testa right here? Big heart?
Speaker 2 (15:28):
This heart?
Speaker 3 (15:28):
Yeah, bleeding heart, big hands, big heart.
Speaker 1 (15:33):
No corment.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
Not true on either.
Speaker 1 (15:40):
I know it's not true. Don in the Morning with
Melissa Moore, the podcast on Cool one oh five.
Speaker 2 (15:49):
Subscribe now so you never miss an episode, and learn
more about the show at cool one o five dot com.
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