Dracula - Chapter 19

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Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in
the public domain. For more information, ought to volunteer, please
visit w w W dot LibriVox dot org. To day's
reading by Alex Foster w w W dot Alex Foster
dot me dot U K. Dracula by Bram Stoker, Chapter nineteen,

(00:26):
Jonathan Harker's Journal, first of October five A m. I
went with the parties to the search with an easy mind,
for I think I never saw Mina so absolutely strong
and well. I am so glad that she consented to
hold back and let us men do the work. Somehow,
it was a dread to me that she was in
this fearful business at all. But now that her work

(00:48):
is done, and that it is due to her energy
and brains and foresight that the whole story is put
together in such a way that every point tells, she
may well feel that her part is finished and she
can henceforth leave the rest to us. We were, I think,
all a little upset by the scene with mister Renfield
when we came away from his room. We were silent
till we got back to the study. Then mister Morris

(01:10):
said to doctor Seward, say, Jack, if that man wasn't
attempting a bluff, he's about the sanest lunatic I ever saw.
I'm not sure, but I believe he had some serious purpose,
and if he had, it was pretty rough on him
not to get a chance. Lord god Alming and I
were silent, But doctor van Helsing added, friend John, you
know more about lunatics than I do, and I am

(01:31):
glad of it, for I fear that if it had
been me to decide, I would before that last hysterical
outburst have given him free. But we live and learn,
and in our present task of he must take no chance.
As my friend Quincy would say, all is best as
they are. Doctor Seward seemed to answer them both in
a dreamy kind of way. I don't know, but that

(01:52):
I agree with you. If that man had been an
ordinary lunatic, I would have taken my chance of trusting him.
But he seemed so mixed up with the Count in
an inn exy kind of way that I am afraid
of doing anything wrong by helping his fads. I can't
forget how he prayed with almost equal fervor for a cat,
then tried to tear my throat out with his teeth. Besides,

(02:12):
he called the count lord and master, and he may
want to get out and help him in some diabolical way.
That horrid thing has the wolves and rats and his
own kind to help him. So I suppose he isn't
above try to use a respectable lunatic. He certainly did
seem earnest, though I only hope we have done what
is best. These things, in conjunction with the wild work
we have in hand, helped to unnerve a man. The

(02:36):
Professor stepped over, and, laying his hand on his shoulder, said,
in his grave, kindly way, friend John, have no fear.
We are trying to do our duty in a very
sad and terrible case. We can only do as we
deem best. What else have we to hope for except
the pity of the good God Lord Godalming had slipped
away for a few minutes, but now he returned. He

(02:58):
held up a little silver whistle as he remarked that
old place may be full of rats, and if so,
I have got an antidote on call. Having passed the wall,
we took our way to the house, taking care to
keep in the shadows of the trees on the lawn
when the moonlight shone out. When we got to the porch,
the professor opened his bag and took out a lot
of things, which he laid on the step, sorting them

(03:19):
into four little groups, evidently one for each. Then he spoke,
my friends, we are going into a terrible danger, and
we need arms of many kinds. Our enemy is not
merely spiritual. Remember that he has the strength of twenty men,
and that though our necks or our windpipes are of
the common kind and therefore breakable or crushable, his are

(03:43):
not amenable to mere strength. A stronger man, or a
body of men more strong in all than him, can
at certain times hold him, But they cannot hurt him,
as we can be hurt by him. We must therefore
guard ourselves from his touch. Keep this near your heart.
As he spoke, he lifted a small silver crucifix and

(04:03):
held it out to me. I, being nearest to him,
put these flowers round your neck. Here he handed me
a wreath of withered garlic blossoms for other enemies more mundane,
this revolver, and this knife, and for aid in all
these so small electrical lamps, which you can fasten to
your breast and for all, and above all at the
last this which we must not desecrate needless, This was

(04:28):
a portion of sacred wafer, which he put in an
envelope and handed to me. Each of the others was
similarly equipped. Now, he said, friend John, where are the
skeleton keys? If we can open the door, we need
not break into the house by the window as before
at Miss Lucy's. Doctor Steward tried one or two skeleton keys,

(04:49):
his mechanical dexterity as a surgeon, standing him in good stead.
Presently he got one to suit. After a little play
back and forward, the bolt yielded, and with a rusty clang,
we pressed on the door. The rusty hinges creaked and
had slowly opened. It was startling, like the image conveyed
to me in doctor Seward's diary of the opening of

(05:10):
Miss Westerner's tomb. I fancied that the same idea appeared
to strike the others, for with one accord they shrank back.
The Professor was the first to move forward, and he
stepped into the open door in manas to us domine,
he said, crossing himself. As we passed over the threshold,
we closed the door behind us, lest when we should

(05:32):
have lit our lamps, we should possibly attract attention from
the road. The professor carefully tried the lock, lest we
might not be able to open it from within. Shall
we be in a hurry making our exit. Then we
all lit our lamps and proceeded on our search. The
light from the tiny lamps fell in all sorts of
odd forms, as the rays crossed each other, or the

(05:54):
opacity of our bodies through great shadows. I could not
for my life get away from the feeling that there
was some one else amongst us. I suppose it was
the recollection so powerfully brought home to me by the
grim surroundings of that terrible experience in Transylvania. I think
the feeling was common to us all, for I noticed
that the others kept looking over their shoulders at every

(06:15):
sound and every new shadow, just as I felt myself doing.
The whole place was thick with dust. The floor was
seemingly inches deep, except where there were recent footsteps, in which,
on holding down my lamp, I could see marks of
hobnails where the dust was cracked. The walls were fluffy
and heavy with dust, and in the corners were masses

(06:36):
of spiders webs whereon the dust had gathered till they
looked like old tattered rags as the weight had torn
them partly down. On a table in the hall was
a great bunch of keys, with a time yellowed label
on each. They had been used several times for on
the table were several similar rents in the blanket of dust,
similar to that exposed when the professor lifted them. He

(06:59):
turned to me and said, you know this place, Jonathan.
You have copied maps of it, and you know it
at least more than we do. Which is the way
to the chapel? I had an idea of its direction,
though on my former visit I had not been able
to get admission to it. So I led the way,
and after a few wrong turnings, found myself opposite a
low arched, oaken door ribbed with iron bands. This is

(07:23):
the spot, said the professor, as he turned his lamp
on a small map of the house copied from the
file of my original correspondence regarding the purchase. With a
little trouble, we found the key on the bunch and
opened the door. Who were prepared for some unpleasantness, for
as we were opening the door, a faint, malodorous air
seemed to exhale through the gaps. But none of us

(07:45):
ever expected such an odor. As we encountered, none of
the others had met the counter tall at close quarters.
And when I had seen him, he was either in
the fasting state of his existence in his rooms, or
when he was bloated with fresh blood in a ruined
building open to the UK. But here the place was
small and close, and the long disuse had made the

(08:05):
air stagnant and foul. There was an earthy smell, as
of some dry miasma, which came through the fowler air.
But as to the odor itself, how shall I describe it?
It was not alone that it was composed of all
the ills of mortality, and with the pungent, acrid smell
of blood. But it seemed as though corruption had become

(08:26):
itself corrupt. Ugh, it sickens me to think of it.
Every breath exhaled by that monster seemed to have clung
to the place and intensified its loathsomeness. Under ordinary circumstances,
such a stench would have brought our enterprise to an end.
But this was no ordinary case, and the high and

(08:47):
terrible purpose in which we were involved, gave us a
strength which rose above merely physical considerations. After the involuntary
shrinking consequent on the first nauseous whiff, we one are
all set about our work as though that loathsome place
where a garden of roses. We made an accurate examination
of the place, the professor saying, as we began, the

(09:09):
first thing is to see how many of the boxes
are left. We must then examine every hole and corner
and cranny, and see if we cannot get some clue
as to what has become of the rest. A glance
was sufficient to show how many remained. For the great
earth chests were bulky, and there was no mistaking them.
There were only twenty nine left out of the fifty.

(09:30):
Once I got a fright for seeing Lord Godalming suddenly
turn and look out of the vaulted door into the
dark passage beyond. I looked, too, and for an instant
my heart stood still somewhere. Looking out from the shadow,
I seemed to see the highlights of the Count's evil face,
the ridge of the nose, the red eyes, the red lips,
the awful pallor. It was only for a moment, for

(09:52):
as Lord God Arming said, I thought I saw a face,
but it was only the shadows, and resumed his inquiry.
I turned my lamp in the direction and stepped into
the passage. There was no sign of anyone, and as
there were no corners, no doors, no aperture of any kind,
but only the solid walls of the passage, there could
be no hiding place, even for him. I took it

(10:14):
that fear had helped imagination, and said nothing. A few
moments later I saw Morris step suddenly back from a
corner which he was examining. We all followed his movements
with our eyes, for undoubtedly some nervousness was growing on us,
and we saw a whole mass of phosphorescence which twinkled
like stars. We all instinctively drew back. The whole place

(10:36):
was becoming alive with rats. For a moment or two
we stood appalled, all save Lord Godalming, who was seemingly
prepared for such an emergency. Rushing over to the great
iron bound, oaken door which doctor Seward had described from
the outside, and which I had seen myself, he turned
the key in the lock, drew the huge bolts, and
swung the door open. Then taking his little silver whistle

(10:59):
from his pocket, he blew a low, shrill call. It
was answered from behind Doctor Seward's house by the yelping
of dogs, and after about a minute three terriers came
dashing around the corner of the house. Unconsciously, we had
all moved towards the door, and as we moved I
noticed that the dust had been much disturbed. The boxes
which had been taken out had been brought this way.

(11:21):
But even in the minute that had elapsed, the number
of the rats had vastly increased. They seemed to swarm
over the place all at once, till the lamp light
shining on their moving, dark bodies and glittering baleful eyes
made the place look like a bank of earth set
with fireflies. The dogs dashed on, but at the threshold
suddenly stopped and snarled, and then, simultaneously, lifting their noses,

(11:43):
began to howl in most lugubrious fashion. The rats were
multiplying in thousands, and we moved out. Lord Godalming lifted
one of the dogs, and, carrying him in, placed him
on the floor. The instant his feet touched the ground,
he seemed to recover. His courage rushed at his natural enemies.
They fled before him so fast that before he had

(12:04):
shaken the life out of a score. The other dogs,
who had by now been lifted in the same manner,
had but small prey ere. The whole mass had vanished
with their going. It seemed as if some evil presence
had departed, for the dogs frisked about and barked merrily
as they made sudden darts of their prostrate foes, and
turned them over and over, and tossed them in the

(12:25):
air with vicious shakes. We all seemed to find our
spirits rise. Whether it was the purifying of the deadly
atmosphere by the opening of the chapel door, or the
relief we experienced by finding ourselves in the open, I
know not, But most certainly the shadow of dread seemed
to slip from us like a robe, and the occasion
of our coming lost something of its grim significance. Though

(12:45):
we did not slacken a whit in our resolution. We
closed the outer door and barred and locked it, and
bringing the dogs with us, began our search of the house.
We found nothing throughout except dust and extraordinary proportions, and
all all untouched save from my own footsteps. When I
had made my first visit. Never once did the dogs

(13:06):
exhibit any symptom of uneasiness, and even when we returned
to the chapel they frisked about as though they had
been rabbit hunting in a summer wood. The morning was
quickening in the east when we emerged from the front.
Doctor van Helsing had taken the key of the hall
door from the bunch and locked the door in orthodox fashion,
putting the key into his pocket. When he had done

(13:28):
so far, he said, our knight has been eminently successful.
No harm has come to us such as I feared
might be. And yet we have ascertained how many boxes
are missing. More than all do I rejoice that this
are first and perhaps our most difficult and dangerous step
has been accomplished without burying therein too, our most sweet
Madam Mina, or troubling her, aching or sleeping thoughts with

(13:49):
sides and sounds and smells of horror which she might
never forget. One lesson too we have learned, if it
be allowable to argue a particularly, that the woutde beasts
which are at the Count's command, are yet themselves not
amenable to his spiritual power. For look these rats that
would come to his call, just as from his castle
top he summoned the wolves to your going, and to

(14:11):
that poor mother's cry. Though they come to him, they
run pell mell from the so little dogs, My friend Arthur,
we have other matters before us, other dangers, other fears.
And that monster he has not used his power over
the broad world for the only or the last time
to night. So be it that he has gone elsewhere. Good.

(14:32):
It has given us opportunity to cry check in some
ways in this check game which we play for the
stake of human souls. Now let us go home. The
dawn is close at hand, and we have reason to
be content with our first night's work. It may be
ordained that we have many knights and days to follow,
if full of peril. But we must go on, and

(14:53):
from no danger shall we shrink. The house was silent
when we got back, save for some poor creature who
was screaming away in one of the distant wards, and
a low moaning sound from Renfield's room. The poor wretch
was doubtless torturing himself after the manner of the insane.
With needless thoughts of pain, I came tiptoe into our

(15:17):
own room, and found Mina asleep, breathing so softly that
I had to put my ear down to hear it.
She looks paler than usual. I hope the meeting to
night is not upset her. I am truly thankful that
she is to be left out of our future work,
and even of our deliberations. It is too great a
strain for a woman to bear. I did not think

(15:39):
so at first, but I know better now. Therefore I
am glad that it is settled. There may be things
which would frighten her to hear, and yet to conceal
them from her might be worse than to tell her
if once she suspected that there was any concealment. Henceforth,
our work is to be a sealed book to her
till at least such time as we can tell her
that all is finished and the earth free from a

(16:00):
monster of the nether world. I daresay it will be
difficult to begin to keep silence after such confidence as ours,
but I must be resolute, and tomorrow I shall keep
dark over to Night's doings, and shall refuse to speak
of anything that has happened. I rest on the sofa,
SOO is not to disturb her First of October. Later,

(16:23):
I suppose it was natural that we should all have
overslept ourselves, for the day was a busy one, and
the night had no rest at all. Even Mina must
have felt his exhaustion, for though I slept till the
sun was high, I was awake before her, and had
to call two or three times before she awoke. Indeed,
she was so sound asleep that for a few seconds
she did not recognize me, but looked at me with

(16:44):
a sort of blank terror, as one looks who has
been waked out of a bad dream. She complained a
little of being tired, and I let her rest till
later in the day. We now know of twenty one
boxes having been removed, and if it be that several
were taken in any of these removals, we may be
able to trace them. All. Such will, of course immensely

(17:04):
simplify her labor, and the sooner the matter is attended to,
the better. I shall look up Thomas Snelling to day
doctor Seward's diary, first of October. It was towards noon
when I was awakened by the Professor walking into my room.
He was more jolly and cheerful than usual, and it
is quite evident that last night's work has helped take

(17:26):
some of the brooding weight off his mind. After going
over the adventure of the night, he suddenly said, your
patient interests me much. May it be that with you
I visit him this morning, or if that you are
too occupied, I can go alone. If it may be.
It is a new experience to me to find a
lunatic who talks philosophy and reason so sound. I had

(17:46):
some work to do, which pressed so I told him
that if he would go alone, I would be glad,
as then I should not have to keep him waiting.
So I called an attendant and gave him the necessary instructions.
Before the professor left the room, I cautioned him again
getting any false impression from my patient, But he answered,
I want to talk to him of himself and of

(18:06):
his delusion as to consuming live things. He said to
Madam Mina, as I see in your diary of yesterday
that he had once had such a belief. Why do
you smile, friend John, excuse me, I said, but the
answer is here. I laid my hand on the type
written matter when our sane and learned lunatic made that
very statement of how he used to consume life. His

(18:28):
mouth was actually nauseous with the flies and spiders which
he had eaten just before missus Harker entered the room.
Van Helsing smiled in turn. Good, He said, your memory
is true, friend John, I should have remembered. And yet
it is this very obliquity of thought and memory which
makes mental disease such a fascinating study. Perhaps I may

(18:48):
gain more knowledge out of the folly of this madman
than I shall from teaching the most wise. Who knows.
I went on with my work, and before long was
through that in hand am The time had been very short, indeed,
but there was Van Helsing back in the study. Do
I interrupt, he asked politely, as he stood at the door,
Not at all, I answered, Come in. My work is finished,

(19:11):
and I am free. I can go with you now
if you like. It is needless. I have seen him well.
I fear that he does not appraise me at much.
Our interview was short. When I entered his room, he
was sitting on a stool in the center, with his
elbows on his knees, and his face was the picture
of sullen discontent. I spoke to him as cheerfully as

(19:32):
I could, and with such a measure of respects I
could assume. He made no reply. Whatever don't you know me?
I asked. His answer was not reassuring. I know you
well enough. You are the old fool van Helsing. I
wish you would take yourself on your idiotic brain theories
somewhere else, damn all thick headed Dutchman. Not a word

(19:52):
more would he say, but sat in his implacable sullenness,
as indifferent to me as though I had not been
in the room at all. Thus departed for this time
my chance of much learning from this so clever lunatic.
So I shall go if I may, and cheer myself
with a few happy words. Without sweet soul madam mina
friend John, It does rejoice me unspeakably that she is
no more to be pained, no more to be worried

(20:13):
with our terrible things. Though we shall much miss her help,
it is better, So I agree with you with all
my heart, I answered earnestly, for I did not want
him to weaken in this matter. Missus Harker is better
out of it. Things are quite bad enough for us,
all men of the world, and who have been in
many tight places in our time, but it is no

(20:33):
place for a woman, and if she had remained in
touch with the affair, it would in time infallibly have
wrecked her. So Van Helsing has gone to confer with missus.
Harker and Harker, Quincy and Art are all out following
up the clues as to the earth boxes. I shall
finish my round of work and we shall meet to night.

(20:54):
Mina Harker's journal, first of October. It is strange to
me to be kept in the dark as I am today,
after Jonathan's full confidence for so many years, to see
him manifestly avoid certain matters, and those are the most
vital of all. This morning, I slept late after the
fatigues of yesterday, and though Jonathan was late too, he

(21:15):
was the earlier. He spoke to me before he went out,
never more sweetly or tenderly. But he never mentioned a
word of what had happened in the visit to the
Count's house. And yet he must have known how terribly
anxious I was, poor dear fellow. I suppose it must
have distressed him even more than it did me. They
all agreed that it was best that I should not

(21:35):
be drawn further into this awful work, and I acquiesced,
but to think that he keeps anything from me, And
now I am crying like a silly fool when I
know it comes from my husband's great love and from
the good good wishes of those other strong men that
has done me good well. Some day Jonathan will tell
me all, and lest it should ever be that he

(21:55):
should think for a moment that I kept anything from him,
I still keep my journalist as usual. Then if he
has feared of my trust, I shall show it to him,
with every thought of my heart, put down for his
dear eyes to read. I feel strangely sad and low
spirited day. I suppose it is the reaction from the
terrible excitement last night. I went to bed when the

(22:17):
men had gone, simply because they told me to. I
didn't feel sleepy, and I did feel full of devouring anxiety.
I kept thinking over everything that has been ever since
Jonathan came to see me in London, and it all
seems like a horrible tragedy, with fate pressing on relentlessly
to some destined end. Everything that one does seems, no
matter how right it may be, to bring on the

(22:39):
very thing which is most to be deplored. If I
hadn't gone to Whitby, perhaps poor dear Lucy would be
with us now. She hadn't taken to visiting the churchyard
till I came. And if she hadn't come there in
the daytime with me, she wouldn't have walked in her sleep.
And if she hadn't gone there at night and asleep,
that monster wouldn't have destroyed her as he did. Oh
why did I ever go to Whitby? There now crying again,

(23:03):
I wonder what has come over me to day. I
must hide it from Donathan, for if he knew that
I had been crying twice in one morning, I who
never cried on my own account, and whom he has
never caused to shed a tear, the dear fellow would
fret his heart out. I shall put a bold face on,
and if I do feel weepy, he shall never see it.
I suppose it is just one of the lessons that

(23:23):
we poor women have to learn. I can't quite remember
how I fell asleep last night. I remember hearing the
sudden barking of the dogs, and a lot of queer sounds,
like preying on a very tumultuous scale from mister Renfield's room,
which is somewhere under this. And then there was silence
over everything, silence so profound that it startled me, and

(23:45):
I got up and looked out of the window. All
was dark and silent, the black shadows thrown by the
moonlight seeming full of a silent mystery of their own.
Not a thing seemed to be stirring, but all to
be grim and fixed as death or fate, so that
a thin streak of white mist that crept with almost
imperceptible slowness across the grass towards the house seemed to

(24:06):
have a sentience and a vitality of its own. I
think that the digression of my thoughts must have done
me good, for when I got back to bed, I
found a lethargy creeping over me. I lay awhile, but
could not quite sleep, so I got out and looked
out of the window again. The mist was spreading, and
was now close up to the house, so that I
could see it lying thick against the wall, as though

(24:27):
it were stealing up to the windows. The poor man
was more loud than ever, and though I could not
distinguish a word, he said I could in some way
recognize in his tones some passionate entreaty on his part.
Then there was the sound of a struggle, and I
knew that the attendants were dealing with him. I was
so frightened that I crept into bed and pulled the
clothes over my head, putting my fingers in my ears.

(24:50):
I was not then a bit sleepy, at least so
I thought. But I must have fallen asleep, for except dreams,
I do not remember anything until the morning when Jonathan
woke me. I think that it took me an effort
in a little time to realize where I was, and
that it was Jonathan who was bending over me. My
dream was very peculiar, and was almost typical of the
way that waking thoughts become merged in or continued in dreams.

(25:15):
I thought that I was asleep and waiting for Jonathan
to come back. I was very anxious about him, and
I was powerless to act. My feet and my hands
and my brain were weighted so that nothing could proceed
at the usual pace, and so I slept uneasily in thought.
Then it began to dawn upon me that the air
was heavy and dank and cold. I put back the

(25:35):
clothes from my face, and found, to my surprise that
all was dim around. The gas light, which I had
left lit for Jonathan but turned down, came only like
a tiny red spark through the fog, which had evidently
grown thicker and poured into the room. Then it occurred
to me that I had shut the window before I
had come to bed. I would have got out to
make certain on the point, but some leaden lethargy seemed

(25:57):
to chain my limbs and even my will. I lay
still and endured that was all. I closed my eyes,
but could still see through my eyelids. It is wonderful
what tricks our dreams players, and how conveniently we can imagine.
The mist grew thicker and thicker, and I could see
now how it came in, For I could see it
like smoke, or with the white energy of boiling water,

(26:19):
pouring in not through the window, but through the joinings
of the door. It got thicker and thicker, till it
seemed as if it became concentrated into a sort of
pillar of cloud in the room, through the top of
which I could see the light of the gas shining
like a red eye. Things began to whirl through my brain,
just as the cloudy column was now whirling in the room.
And through it all came the scriptural words, a pillar

(26:42):
of cloud by day and of fire by night. Was
it indeed such spiritual guidance that was coming to me
in my sleep? But the pillar was composed of both
the day and the night guiding, for the fire was
in the red eye, which at the thought got a
new fascination for me, till as I looked, the fire
divided and seemed to sh shine on me through the fog,
like two red eyes, such as Lucy told me of

(27:03):
in her momentary mental wandering. When on the cliff, the
dying sunlight struck the windows of Saint Mary's Church, suddenly
the horror burst upon me that it was thus that
Jonathan had seen those awful women growing into reality through
the whirling mist in the moonlight. And in my dream
I must have fainted, for all became black darkness. The

(27:24):
last conscious effort which my imagination made was to show
me a livid white face bending over me out of
the mist. I must be careful of such dreams, for
they would unseat one's reason. If there were too much
of them, I would get doctor van Helsing or doctor
Seward to prescribe something for me which would make me sleep,

(27:46):
only that I fear to alarm them. Such a dream
at the present time would become woven into their fears
for me. To night I shall strive hard to sleep naturally.
If I do not, I shall to morrow night get
them to give me a dose of chloral that cannot
have for once, and it will give me a good
night's sleep. Last night tired me more than if I
had not slept at all. Second of October, at ten

(28:10):
p m. Last night, I slept, but did not dream.
I must have slept soundly, for I was not waked
by Jonathan coming to bed. But the sleep has not
refreshed me. For to day I feel terribly weak and spiritless.
I spent all yesterday trying to read or lying down dozing.
In the afternoon, mister Renfield asked if he might see me,

(28:32):
poor man. He was very gentle, and when I came away,
he kissed my hand and bade God bless me some way.
It affected me much. I am crying when I think
of him. This is a new weakness of which I
must be careful. Jonathan would be miserable if he knew
I had been crying. He and the others were out
till dinner time, and they all came in tired. I

(28:54):
did what I could to brighten them up, and I
supposed that the effort did me good, for I forgot
how tired I was. After dinner, they sent me to
bed and all went off to smoke together, as they said,
but I knew that they wanted to tell each other
of what had occurred to each other during the day.
I could see from Jonathan's manner that he had something
important to communicate. I was not so sleepy as I

(29:15):
should have been, so before they went I asked Doctor
Seward to give me a little opiate of some kind,
as I had not slept well the night before. He
very kindly made up a sleeping draft, which he gave
to me, telling me that it would do me no
harm as it was very mild. I have taken it
and am waiting for sleep, which still keeps aloof I

(29:35):
hope I have not done wrong, for as sleep begins
to flirt with me, a new fear comes that I
may have been foolish in thus depriving myself of the
power of waking. I might want it here comes sleep
good night. End of Chapter nineteen, read in Nottingham, England,

(29:59):
on the twenty eighth of Jjanuary twenty o six by
Alex Foster www. Dot Alexfoster dot me dot UK