The Mystery Episode

What could this episode be about??? The Dudes don't know... No seriously... They don't know... They recorded it, didn't upload it for a few days, and forgot what it's about. Let's all find out together!

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Episode Transcript

(00:01):
Dude. That was perfect, perfectdude, perfect, perfect trick shots.
We should make a YouTube channel,all different YouTube. What mean my cars
never clean every single day in thesame root see no money in the bank

(00:25):
of gas in my tank? Tone? No, what's the do? Tone?
What the thing do? Come?Welcome to dude, problem problems,
Dude problems. That was the interestof the podcast. At the beginning of
the podcast. I yes, okay, I was just making sure. Yeah,
I would just start talking, youknow what I mean. I would
have just started to talking. Idon't. I don't even know how to

(00:46):
jump in. I had a topic. We did good. What we're doing.
I have a topic. I hada topic, but I completely forgot
about it in the month. It'sokay because we'll remember. Actually, no
before I forget about it. CanI have a quick story time? This
bitch today, dude, this bitchones got hit by my damn car.
Okay, yeah, this this personloves this. Typically we start off with
like Howard days of this person andthis person jumped like with jaywalking and they

(01:10):
stopped in the middle of the roadbecause they saw my car coming. Yeah,
and then when I got like twentyfeet close to him, they started
walking again, and so I'm like, bro, what's this is? Like
a sixty year old lady? Asixty year old lady. Yes, and
dude, she is just just justJaywalking's where she's right in front of me
wild, I'm like twenty feet atthis point. So I just swerve into

(01:33):
the right lane and was right nextto me, and I'm like, what's
going on in this? Dude?She looks back at me and she just
starts laughing. What swear to God? She's everything I love? She starts
insane, Bro, she's insane.She's insane, Like what clinically clinically like,
what are you doing? I don'tknow, bro, jaywalking that's her
hobby. Sixties also like sixties,you're pretty, you're pretty young. Sixties

(01:57):
so young. She had a wholehead of gray hair. Facts, but
it was like a lot of hair. And she's able to comprehend what's going
on? No way, you justj walking in the street and then you
stop like a deer in headlights rightin front of a Mini coopering ninety miles
an hour going ninety What I wasnot on the highway? Can you tell
me the speed limit of the streetthat you were on? Not where you

(02:17):
were going, But can you tellme the most likely to speed limit probably
like four thirty five forty thirty fiveforty, So you're probably going on like
what sixty five seven? I'm goinglike twenty five hundred forty in that range.
No, it's going like forty fivehundred and fifteen. I wish my
car get get up in two ten. I don't wish my car could get

(02:37):
up to two ten. I wouldn'tbe able to trust myself. I would
still try to drive with one handand just lose control. There's nowhere no
pta ramps, and just really lockin at that point. What if you're
at two ten, No, ifyou're at two ten, yeah, no,
you gotta really lock in. That'slike that dude on TikTok. Yeah
wait, what the dude on TikTok, the uh something speedy guy? That
was a good bird. I don'tthink I blocked that at all. Still,

(03:00):
the sound went around your hand andthen yeah, it was also into
my mic at the same time,like directly in my mind, did you
hear your I possibly inhaled your bird, bro, There's no way that's that
reminds me of the story time thatthat I don't want to say on the
podcast Carbon Dioxide is it's a funnystory time. I'll tell you tell me

(03:23):
later after the Yeah, if Ican remember how to speak Jesus, squeeze
bends, squeeze bens, squeeze bins, squeeze bens, squeeze. Oh.
Yes, he didn't get arrested.I thought he did. I don't know.
I'm not really talked about him.I think on the podcast, I'm
pretty sure he did. Just drivingjust like people like driving me. Yeah,
driving like Yeah, if you don'tknow who Squeeze Benz is, look

(03:44):
him up. This dude's going likea hundred and like the busiest road honestly
more I mean, yeah, he'sjust causing traffic. It's calling traffic,
calling accidents in traffic. He likegoes to a four way light and then
like just doughnuts in the middle ofit, and he does it in front
of cops and they don't care copschase him. They just he just escaped
something. All in rental cars,All in rental cars. Somehow, somehow

(04:04):
people just keep renting cards, youknow what I mean. But I feel
like somebody wants his their car tobe like driven by squeezebens. I feel
like that's the good promotion. Isit really? Probably? How is it
good promotion? Squeeze, you didn'tknow what you could say? Who it
is like he in the body,like an insurance claim or something on it.
I respect it, yeah, Imean it's all insurance. I guess

(04:25):
fraud. I probably still wouldn't wantit. It's not fraud. Squeezebence is
love for Honestly, Squeeze pens isfraud. He is squez. What is
your phone screen still on? Youwatched it? No? No, no,
Google photosol Oh, I was soconfused. Screen is uh no?
Yeah, my lock screen's a PlayStationad? What my lock screens a PlayStation
ad? PlayStation like the PlayStation symbol? No, it's an ad from the

(04:46):
two that so PlayStation had really coolads back in the two thousand. I
mean I remember it's like oh yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, It's
like it's like the PlayStation symbols,but on a pill. Yeah, be
bro, because pills were cool backin the Hills were not cool. Pills
were very cool in the early twothousand. I think people were doing like
below. I mean I was akid. I think people were pills were

(05:08):
like art when we were like inhigh school. That's what dude. People
are doing the whole zandemic. No, but yeah, XAMX is a pill.
But way before that, dude,I'm talking like when you can get
them like Noah, they were moreabout the bog of sugar. Nah,
dude, the early two thousands,you could buy pills so easy. Yeah.
Yeah, I'm not sure. Butwhen when I was a kid and

(05:29):
my brother was a changer, Yeah, they were doing pills. I'm sure
they were, but they were allabout the bug of shugar. No they
weren't. Yeah, but they lovethat. They did not. They love
that bog sugar and heroin. Dude, No, no, that's what they
did. Absolutely not in the earlytwo thousands, bro, cocaine was like
nineties and ship. They still dida lot of cocain the two thousands.
I mean, people do cocaine regardless. It's like a South America thing,
bro, South America. It's justlike a Hollywood thing. It's like,

(05:51):
if I guess you're in Hollywood,you're doing get the cocaine. Probably Columbia,
Yeah, probably Columbia. Yeah,insane. I mean you know Cuba
cub is huge too, really,yeah, keep a huge on cocaine almost,
but I didn't. I don't thinkit's so hard. I doubt it.
Yeah, I think so. I'mmost positive. Yeah, that's why
when you go to Miami, it'sall Cubans, bro trust me, I
mean, yeah, that makes sense. This is Cuba was locked down.

(06:12):
Yeah, Cubans. Cubans really,they like the booger sugar as well.
Cuban dude. Cubans drive cards fromthe fifties. It's pretty bad ass.
I don't lie. What. Yeah, it's like it's like a time Yeah,
no, I know, he waslike a time capsule. There's I
can't afford, Like there's a nicecars though. They're stuck in the fifties.
I know. I'm just saying thegovernment has zero money. That's why
they're stuck in the fifties. Thegovernment's very corrupt and ship yeah exactly,
Yeah, I know. Yeah,people, it's moretunate. It's more than

(06:33):
just they're broken the fifties. They'revery corrupt as well, and they didn't
care about the population. Well,they're very broke because the corrupt. Yeah,
I know, it's just a lot, it's just a lot more than
just they're broke. But we're notprofessionals in Cuba's I like a year ago.
A year ago, I was prettybig on history. I probably know
it a little bit. Not anymore. Well, yeah, I mean it's
like the history of economy and shitlike that. Yeah, like, bro,

(06:57):
who wants to learn about numbers.I don't go to funk about numbers.
I like knowing how it happened.Hitler has one ball. That's history.
You learned that from me. Stalinwas bawling. Uh, your girlfriend
kept calling and now she's on nowshe's still won't stop hollering. That's yeah.
As the first lyric was actually partof the song. Everything else was
freestyled by Jaden. I actually wantedto bring something up because you brought up

(07:18):
a Colombia and cocaine, and whatI'm going to bring up is a water
park. What does that have todo? That's the crazy part. That's
the insane part, is like youprobably can sit there and not even imagine
how those fucking things tie together.I can't exactly, but once I say,
it's super obvious. So basically,Pablo Escobar, when he was still
running shit and he was not inthe prison that he built for himself,

(07:41):
he had hippos he had. Yeah, well he had hippos, but he
also had a giant mansion and Ican't remember. He also had his zoo
as well everything. Literally, theyturned the zoo into a water park and
it is now the main attraction inMetaging Columbia. Really, it's a water
park. It's sick. They turnedPablo escobar actual zoo into a water really.

(08:03):
Yeah, you know, he's thewhole reason there's a Columbia, right,
yeah, Columbia, I mean Pablocourse, Columba. Yeah that's where
he lived though, right, that'swhere his house was. Yes, yes,
I think Columbia. He's the wholereason Columbia has a hippos, The
whole reason Columbia has hippos because heordered hippos. Is no, you're right,
the hippos came to his lake orhe put hippos in his lake because
he had like a little zoo.Yeah, he had a little zoom.

(08:24):
And after he died, obviously,no one took care of the hippos and
the hippos when they made babies andthey have a rest, is that really
when yeah, they yeah, theyand they had I'm gonna go down a
rabbit hole of hippo sex after this. That's beast reality. No, I'm
just gonna see if sure. Whyare hippos in Colombia pabloscbar bost Some hippos

(08:48):
had him shipped over, he diedand they had sex. Yeah pretty much
that's what. Yeah, a thousandpercent what happened. And now Colombia is
trying to get rid of hippos,and I think they're trying to They're not
trying to kill him, they're tryingto ship hippos are They're really deadly,
dude, They're like they're like giantpuppy dog. Dude. They'll they'll like
squash your head like a watermelon forfun and then just walk away. Hippo,

(09:09):
you would maybe last one MILLI second. Give me a pole, and
I'm good a pole? Yeah,poll, What are you gonna do with
that? Because I've heard that whenthey do rush at you, I mean
they're pretty quick, but they opentheir mouth all the way rushing at you.
So I would just like put ahole in their mouth and when they
shut down, they're gonna be like, oh, you know, they're just
gonna chop your hand on. Imean, I don't know, they'll probably

(09:30):
just charge you or something hippos arescary, dude, were elephants Elephants not
elephants are cool. I mean unlessyou unless you fuck with them. Yeah,
that's what I mean. They're notcool, like and very corrupt.
You ever hear about the elephant thatthey came to the woman's funeral and just
stomped it down. That's because hehad insane Yeah, because they're really smart
and they and they have very goodmemory, and they remember if you fuck

(09:52):
them over, and they'll they'll comeback, They'll come back. Dude,
tru dude got a plane ticket sheyeah, wedding, he got an invitation
over. The suit was completely disguised. No one knewho. No, he
ran in there and trampled everything.Where did they get married next to a
fucking elephant house? No? Itwas her funeral? Oh her funeral?
Yeah? An elephant? Yes?Where was it? Why wasn't it was

(10:13):
like India or something? What?Yeah, dude, that's if you it
kind of makes sense ya. Ifyou an elephants, they touch those animals.
No, if you just fuck withan elephant, they remember you.
It doesn't matter what you do.Well, no, of course you pissed
it off, it's gonna remember youand it's gonna fuck you up. That's
insane. Yeahants are crazy. It'slike that all the time. Most suits
who are very abusive. I feellike the animals, they end up sucking
them over at some point or another. Who just animals that are getting I

(10:37):
would say if people get sucked over, I wouldn't say like poachers, but
I would say, like, Imean the the what's that documentary about the
aquatica fish or SeaWorld fish? It'snot real, dude, what are you
talking about? Yes, so bluefish? Is that what it's called. I
don't know what it's called. I'mtalking about the time A fact check it.
But yes, the documentary about SeaWorld The Woman Got Held On by
the Lake? Oh oh, Ithought you were talking about the Everyone's like

(11:01):
he was just playing, but likehe was probably just passed to be honest.
I mean, I don't know.I guess you could say this.
I'm trying to think of. Ithought you meant you were talking about the
Sea World documentary. No, isthat not what that documentary is about.
I've actually never seen the documentary.I just assumed that that's what it's about.
What was it called The Woman whoGot drowned. What was it?
Black blackfish? Thank you? Yes, I clearly just found it. As
you said that. Why did wesay bluefish? It's a blackfish? It

(11:22):
was close, but blackfish. Yeah, all those Sea World workers I had,
so in the eighth grade, wehad we watched it in class and
then I have no context, bythe way, so what you're saying,
yeah, yeah, I don't rememberlike everything, but like in the eighth
grade, we had to watch thatdocumentary and after the you know, after
we finished here like, oh mygod, Sea World piece of shit,
blah blah blah. Don't get mewrong. Sea World still they're a pretty
big piece of shit. I don'tdispute that they do. Yeah, it

(11:46):
is kind of sometimes. I mean, okay, it is a fun place
to be, but but you know, they could have bigger tanks for their
animals. That would be pretty cool. But uh, eighth grade, seventh
grade, seventh grade, seventh grade, seventh grade, yes, not eighth
grade, seventh grade. We hadto watch Blackfish and then afterwards he was
like, yo, By the way, all those people worked at Sea World

(12:09):
for maybe a month and a half, two months. They were just trying
to, you know, make SeaWorldlook really bad, and obviously they're not
a great company. Not things theydo or great. They probably shouldn't do
all those things. The animals probablyshould give a bigger tanks. But a
lot of those people didn't really workat SeaWorld and they were bullshitting for a
lot of it. Yeah, soyeah, can't trust everything, see that.

(12:30):
That's the thing. I just Ididn't even know that that's what it
was about. I had no ideathat those people got a job there just
exposed everything. Well, they didn'tget a job there just to expose everything,
No, they so they work therefor like a month or two and
they were like oh fuck this,and then they were making the documentary and
like, hey, you work there, come come do the documentary. You
know, you know what I mean. But in reality, they worked there

(12:50):
for I can not even yahublic documentary. They're like, oh, you worked
there when you were like twelve?Yeah, yeah, I mean shit.
I feel like I'd be pretty goodperson for documentary at public A public documentary?
What a public documentary? Yeah,we'd be stocking chicken. Stocking chicken
is yeah, frying it as well. Yeah I don't stock chicken. Yeah

(13:11):
either, I'd be giving people alot of tickets. Did you be giving
people a lot of dude? Youchange people's lives, bro, I don't
I actually make them worse? Yeah? Probably actually gambling addictions, but like
that one person that might actually winlike a good amount of money. I
was in line one day and thensome dude was telling me about how like,
oh my mom won like five grandback to back off these bitches some
Yeah, I hear about it allthe time. Yeah, I'm sure people

(13:33):
bullshit all the time. Yeah,but uh, I want two hundred dollars
off a two dollars scratch off?Okay, yeah, did I tell you
about that two dollars scratch off twohundred? Yep? Yeah, I won
a million, remember that? Yeah, fake lotto? Tell me about it.
Two dollars. You spent two dollarsand got two hundred. Uh,
don't tell publics. But I gota tip, and uh these we're not
allowed to get tick tips. ButI took the tip because money hypothetical situation.

(13:56):
It was not hypothetical. It allhappened. Well it'll have yeah,
yeah, it was all very real. They all have very So I took
this tip. All the managers listenedto the podcast. I mean that's the
fucking insane part. Yeah. Actuallyany time, our manager casually just dropped
this on me. She was makingdinner and she was like, yeah,
I'm just listening to the boys.Yeah yeah that that that baffled me.

(14:20):
I thought, I think it's awesome. It's a good time. They find
it, they find hilarious. There'sa couple of young dudes just like dicking
around the entire time. OK,they're gonna go see us. So they're
gonna go Yeah, they're gonna gosee us tomorrow, not me tomorrow,
but they're gonna see us, andthey're gonna be like, yeah, podcast
blah blah blah. I just thinkit's the coolest thing, the one they're
great. Yeah, it's it is. It's like a little community. Continue
with your scratch forgot Oh yeah yeah. I got two dollars tip and then

(14:41):
uh I was like, oh,I also have this two dollars winter So
I had four dollars total from mylotto. So I went over there and
I was like, all right,cool four dollars and I was like,
let me get just two of thesetwo dollar tickets. And one of them
won nothing, and I started scratchingthe other one and it's had fifty dollars
and I was like, oh,that's really cool. And then I scratched

(15:01):
it a little more and it saidfifty dollars again, and I was like,
that's that's even better. That iseven better. Then it said fifty
dollars again, and I was like, that's just beautiful. One hundred and
fifty. And then I got nothing, and then I got nothing, and
then I got another fifty dollars,so I was like, oh, let's
go so yeah, that's yeah,dude, I never had that. Look,

(15:22):
that's the most I've ever won ona scratch off, Like most I've
ever won. I think it's onehundred. I want one hundred on a
ten dollar yeah, twenty. Ithink it was a twenty dollars that I
want one hundred dollars twenty oh recently. And I wasn't even legal at that
time. I mean got that time. It was insane. But you know
what I'm talking about, Like Ihad my I had my stepfather buy a
lotto tickets because I wanted to play. Then he cashed it and took all
the money because you can't leave it. He cashed it and took twenty bought

(15:43):
the ticket. Oh, well,then you know what I mean. I
would I would have took my twenty. I was like, can I please
have a ticket? And he washe got He spent forty dollars two tickets
and one of them. What aguy, dude, he got you a
twenty dollars ticket. That's my gobro, dude, I would have got
you like a dollar ticket. Hewas going to take the money. He
wasn't really expecting that though. No, I don't know why he would do
that, to be honest. Now, I would have taken a half.
If you won fifty, he probablywould have taken the fifty, but since

(16:03):
it was one hundred, he wasjust like, I'm gonna let you keep
it. Ge, No, Iwould I get fifty. I think he
won like a I think he maybewon like ten dollars. I think he
was negative. He was negative.I was really pissed off because I was
playing a twenty dollars ticket, andwhile we were really just talking about scratch
ofs right now. But anyways,I was playing a twenty dollars ticket and
I won five dollars. Yeah,five dollars, five dollars, I see

(16:25):
five dollars. I just made mymoney back, and so I'm so pissed
off, like could only five dollars? Really? Yeah, yeah that's what
we got. Man. I'm justgonna buy the Uh that was the last
time I played. I'm not playingit for a while. I made my
money scratch off. Yeah, Imade my money. I'm not tap out
for a bit. You should tapout for a bit. Yeah, my
rock casino instead. Man, whenI turned twenty one, We're going to

(16:45):
Vegas blackjack table. Dude, youthink I'm kidding too, I'm no,
I don't think you're kidding. It'sjust I'm playing this since I was eight
years old. Like. The theinsane part is Pops is coming. Everyone's
coming a lot of money. No, no, no, no, it
will be a Pop. He's gonnabe very smart. He's gonna he's been
to Vegas. He's been to Vegasmany times. He's gonna be our savior.
He's gonna be our savior and Poptrust, he's gonna be saved to

(17:07):
do it's probably Pops. I'm notgonna lie. He could do it.
Yeah I have. I'll put allmy money outa he's gonna say all the
money on black all my money onPops, all my money on black.
I'll give it pops my money.I'm putting forty two grand down on black.
I don't even what is that calledroulette? That is that is called
roulette? Roulette stupid. I'd neverplayed roulette. I've also never played it.
No, I wouldn't. I'm sayingI would never play, never play

(17:29):
it. I don't get there.It's all it's all chance in luck.
Yeah, that's the thing. Isee it in David Dobricks. I used
to see it in David Dobricks likevlogs all the time, and they would
just go there with like fifteen grandand put it on like red, and
then they would make thirty. AndI was just like, how does that
work? No way, you justpick one of two colors and double your
money. I mean you pick numbersand ship too. But like it.
Yeah, it's super luck chance.That's why i'd play like. I mean,
every game is super luck chance,let's be real. But like blackjackets,

(17:52):
I don't know. I feel likethere's a better chance on blackjack,
which is not really true. I'lljust spend like two hours in slots.
Fuck no, so much easier tocomprehend. Yeah, but that's how you
waste money, and then I doit in New Vegas. I play slots
in Fallout New Vegas an ideo,Yeah, and I may I made like
four thousands, Like, dude,you know how many hours you have on

(18:12):
the game of practice? Yeah,but I have him saying I have I
have except instead of caps, it'sgonna be your Actually, I've been played
Fallout in New Vegas in a reallylong time. I have like thirty three
hours on the game. And howmany hours was just playing slots? You
know, like three that's a solidchunk. Yeah, I got I have
a long time, solid Yeah,and now I wasn't three. It was

(18:33):
probably like an hour, okay,but I made like four grand. It's
not that bad. Four worth it? Yeah, four caps, four grand
caps, four caps? Yeah forthe currency. No, I'm sorry,
four thousand caps, yeah, fourthousand caps, four thousand four It was
like four grand incaps. Yeah,four grand incaps? There ago, No,
four grand in caps is probably aton of money. It isn't the
isn't there like a no? Huh? I thought caps were less valuable than

(18:56):
yeah, the world money bacically capsurebottle caps. Yeah, obviously you know
what I'm saying. Yeah, Soit's not four grand caps. No,
but it's four thousand caps. Yeah, and you're you're not gonna get shit
with four thousand caps. Sure,you can buy everything with four thousand caps.
My fault, bro, I'm thinkingof a different Fallout game. I
mean, you can't buy everything buta lot of four thousand caps. Can
I drop a fun fact on thebar room? Yeah? Drop it.

(19:18):
It's gonna be good to switch itup. So in Arizona, I just
stopped into my mind because I readabout this not too long ago, and
I thought it was so interesting weshould go there. In Arizona, there's
something called pusum. You're talking aboutthe drink p o z u m.
I'm pretty sure, or I couldbe misspelling it, but I know it's
pusum. Poz sounds like prozac.No, it's not. So it's a
museum of ship stop it. Yeah, I'm not going to it's all poop.

(19:42):
I'm not going to that is it'scalled pusum. It is a strictly
only poop music. I understand it. Now. All kinds of animals.
They have a fossil the biggest it'sa Guinness World Record of the biggest mammal
poop like a dinosaur, like awhat I'm so serious, I'm not even
walking with I wish I was fuckingwith you. It's so far. I
wish I was. I wish Iwas. Do they have They have poop

(20:03):
from all kinds of like ancient animals. It sounds it looks so cool.
It's insane. Yeah, And theyhave like poop souvenirs. You can get
what like poop shirts and pooky chainsand like little poopball going why not not
going, dude? What's not gonnago stare at poop for two hour on
the history of Don't give a damnYou've never wanted to see a poop fossil?

(20:26):
No, really, no, howrare is it poop fossil? I
don't give a damn how rare itis. One. Just go to a
real like a real museum and like, look at dinosaurs. It's just lam.
I want to look at their ship. They don't show you that,
bro, just saying they don't.They're hiding it. There's something, bro,
there's something in the ship that youdon't want you to see. What
is it? Chips, computers,CPUs, cbus. All the dinosaurs are

(20:51):
robots made by the government exactly.The government has been around for years a
lot due the government. It's likemen in Black. The government are all
like the aliens inside of like humanmachines. Never men Barry. You've never
seen men in black? What?Yeah, I've never seen him. That's
insane. Yeah, I ain't gonnalie. I've never seen men in Black.
That's it. Don't watch like thenew ones. I don't care to
see the new one. Yeah,I don't watch any of the new ones.

(21:11):
But like the classics, was WillSmith like one through three? Yeah?
What one, two, three?One through three? Yeah, one
through three, one through three,Yeah, the first one is always gonna
be the best one. I've neverseen. Uh, what's it called men
in Black? I've wrote the rideat Universal though. You know. The
insane thing is is there's actually acharacter that reminds me a lot of you,
and it's the Smith. No,it's the pug Will Smith as well.

(21:33):
It's the pug. There's a pugin the in the in the a
dog that can barely fucking breathe.That reminds me nobody talks. He can
talk. It's like an alien pugsituation. He's adorable and he's got like
this raspy, like chain smoke orcigarette voice. What are you trying to
say? And he's I'm not tryingto say anything. I'm just like,
he's really funny though, and hejust doesn't really give a shit, you
know what i mean. Like,he just it's so fun You just gotta

(21:55):
watch the movie to understand. BroUh huh, he would like you.
They'll they'll pull up right. Okay, I'm putting you in a scenario.
Uh huh. You have Will Smithand you have that white dude. I
don't really know, really old whiteguy act there. Brother, They're probably
you got to pick the pug inthe back. They're rolling up to a
scene where there are hostile aliens rightand then and what they get out the
car. I'm trying to remember thescene. Anyways, he sounds like,

(22:18):
you know what I mean, likeand you'd like to have a good fucking
time day. I'm gonna say,damn, a piss on your fucking seat.
I've never too long, I've neversounded like that. No, I'm
not saying you sound like that.His personality reminds me of you trying to
make it correlation. You don't looklike a fay Okay, that's what.
No, that's why I was thinking. I was like, Damn, I
look like a dog that can't read. You don't look No, you don't

(22:38):
look like a pug. I'm notsaying. He physically reminds me. Okay,
okay, that makes me feel alot better. Yeah. No,
I'm so sorry that there was confusion. No. Yeah, I thought he
was calling me a pug problems.Bro, I'm sorry, a chain smoking
dog with breathing problems. I ama change fucking dog breathing problems. How
did you know? Really, Iguess I just guessed that you did.
Just guess that you're kind of alegend and sane. But I mean,

(23:00):
listen, we did skip through,like some one of the biggest parts that
we typically start the podcast off withus, which is a how's how's your
week? Ben? Dude? Yeah, I won't. I started the podcast
and forgot everything we do on apodcast. I know you were really well,
I don't even what did you whatdid you start it all? You
just went right into the jaywalking elderlyYeah, dude, so I wouldn't forget

(23:22):
Yeah, the jaywalking under woman.But how was your week? My week?
My week was very good. I'mactually doing side quest right now as
I talk. I hope there's nobackground audio as I do this. You
shouldn't be But yeah, my weekhas been very good. I just worked.
Trying to think that I do anythingfun, I don't think so.
I think I genuinely just went towork this week. Really, Yeah,

(23:44):
I mean there's weeks like that.Everyone just like genuinely goes to work sometimes,
I mean, I mean doesn't reallydo anything else. Yeah, but
like I feel like I spent myweek for the last like three weeks.
That's everyone's a week for the lastthree weeks. But you gotta you gotta
earn the Yeah. I don't evenretired yet. Yeah, yeah, that's
true. That's true. I don'thave a weekend now, so I can
have like a weekend every day twentyyears. Well, I went to uh,

(24:04):
I went to Clearwater Beach. Ohyeah, you had fun? This
I did? I did. Itwas an intense weekend. So I'll go
ahead and just start off from thebeginning. But there is a reason why
I actually was not here Sunday.I was supposed to work Sunday. I
know, so Lydia picked up thephone and was like, where are you
going? Yeah, yeah, Iknow, I wasn't going. I was
where I needed to be all theway in Clearwater. So yeah, I

(24:26):
was standing right next to Lydia whenyou called. Yeah it was it was
insane. So what happened? Imean, we had a great time.
We got up there, hit upTreasure Island beach. I love Treasure,
hit up some seafood. I gotsome black and Mahi tacos, she got
some sort of shrimp pasta, shegot some crab legs, and I do
that's what we were gonna get aboil seafood boy. But it was like
the three seafood boil place we couldfind is mister and missus scrabs and it

(24:48):
was like nowhere near the water.But we wanted to eat something on the
water, so we looked up likeseafood boils like on like beach front like
restaurants I know and clear Water thatwe go to all the time. So
that's the thing we were at TreasureIsland at first. Yeah, it's like
a it's literally like a twenty minuteuber drive. Whatever you gotta do,
twenty minute Uber drive, I meantwenty five. Yeah, it's it's so

(25:08):
far, so worth it. It'son the water. It's like the best
crab ever. Next time you go, ask for the place news. Yeah,
I ask my dad forgot what it'scalled, but it's so good.
Every time we stay in Treasure Island, that's where we go. Really yeah,
I swear to god we walked there. That's insane. What do you
mean you walk for? You walkthere? You walk a twenty minute drive
from Treasure Island. It's yeah,yeah, that's insane. That's crazy.

(25:32):
Like on the beach, Yeah,we're on we're men. You walk on
the beach. It's like on thesidewalk, but yeah, you could walk.
Yeah. I would never do that, but I'll get chafed like a
bitch, start screaming walking penguin style. I never do that. Yeah,
we're men. We're men. Wewalk across the bridge and everything. Yeah,
we're men. We got a uhwe got an airbnb. I think
it's Treasure Island. You have medouble yeah, yeah, because we only

(25:52):
stay on, Like, wonder twodifferent fucking beaches, did you completely different
things? No? No, whatI'm thinking about is definitely Treasure Island.
Treasure Island is No, maybe wetake the boat to Treasure Island. We
definitely take the boat to Treasure Island. But we're trying to talk. I'm
trying to think where we stay,Dude'm trying to think about where we stay.
I'm trying to think about where thecrad place is, the crab place.
Yeah, I'm gonna let you dothis. Yeah no, no,

(26:15):
no, not on the podcast.And I won't get into the podcast.
It's gonna take like I haven't beenthere like five years. It's gonna take
like my brain to like really think. Okay, Well, anyways, we
went over to Clearwater after that becausethat's where our our airbnb was and the
plan was to leave early morning.We got a ton of pictures on the
sunset and got some pizza. Clearwateris a bitch, by the way.

(26:37):
You mean, hey, to ClearwaterBeach. It's like Miami bro I love
Clearwater. Oh the traffic, Yeah, traffic's insane. Well that's why you
don't go to like Main Clearwater.You go to every other part of Clayarwater.
Yeah, I mean, we justwent to Main Clearwater because don't do
that. It was it was theclosest to hours, just right over the
bridge. Because we so here's here'sthe airbnb, here's the bridge, and
here's main clearwater and then here's everythingfucking so we just went right over that

(27:00):
bridge and that's where we were.We found parking in a parking garage instantly,
So it was just too good tobe true. The only thing is
is TV volumes up by the way, It's okay. The only thing is
is it started like, I mean, we left before pour down rain,
but there was a giant raindorm cloudwith lightning, so we were all like,
let's leave. And at the sametime, everyone is looking at this

(27:22):
giant cloud that's like black justighting init, so they're all like, yeah,
we all should leave at the sametime. So the traffic was absolutely
insane horrible, like it's it's sofrom the beach and the Airbane Beads four
miles. It took us like thirtyeight minutes to just go four miles.
We're barely really anywhere. Yeah,it was really bad. And because it's

(27:45):
like the sunset was if I showedyou the pictures we took, you would
have never thought. Right behind uswas like the worst dorm we've ever seen
in life. Yeah, I mean, yeah, I could imagine. It
was insane. But anyways, wewoke up in the morning and went to
a Colombian restaurant to get breakfast andI got in my car. I start
my car, A car doesn't start. Oh, And I was like okay,

(28:06):
So then I start my car again. I'm like, oh my car
is starting. Shitah. She's like, this is like where everything just goes
downhill. My car was cranking,but it was not starting, and then
I got it started at one pointand then it just stopped. It just
went like dodges shut down. SoI was like, this is this fucking
sucks. So it ended up beinga whole fiasco. Turns out the fiasco
was really for nothing because it wasa filter in my car. That's all

(28:27):
it was. It was the intakefilter. So when the intake filter,
it's like every thirty thousand miles Isupposed to change it, and obviously I
haven't changed it in like sixty sinceI got the car. So it's just
like it was completely clogged and whenthere's no air getting danging, it just
won't start. Damn. So itwas really not that big of a deal.
But yeah, because you thought itwas way more. You didn't think

(28:48):
I'd never right, Like who knowsthat shit? You know what I mean?
Like I'm not sitting here like it'sdefinitely my intake filter. It's my
intake filtered to my first thing,my starters. Something's on my starter.
I do have a check engine laneof my car that I haven't figured out.
Loser. It's like looser, loser. I don't know what it could
be. It doesn't like, Ohmy god. I take it in and
they put the little fucking electronic thinkingin it and they're like, oh,

(29:11):
yeah, these are all the problemsyou have. And I spend like two
grand fixing all these problems and thenthe lights still there, and I'll take
it in They'll be like, yeah, these are all the problems you have.
And I'm like, doc, comeon, like let's like, let's
be so serious right now. Ifeel like they're lying to me because as
of right now, the only problemthat I am aware of is that the
gears and my and my transmission aredirty. So it affects like acceleration and

(29:32):
like small things like that, andit could trigger the the the check engine
line, the check engine light.But then again, it's just like my
car is running fine now other thanthe filter I just had to change.
Maybe you should just get a canof air. And just like spray it
in that bitch, just spray inmy engine. Ye, clean it out.
I guess I don't think you shoulddo that. What's that? What's
that stuff people use for keyboards?Can of air? Is that really just

(29:53):
that's what it's called? No way, Yeah, we use it at work,
all that we use. If weuse that public all the time to
clean the keyboard, I'm just aclean ship. Yeah, intense, yo,
let me get that cannon. Letme get that can. And a
lot of times when the card readeris like jammich there, some ship doesn't
worries get it freaking right in there. And oh, we do have it.

(30:14):
I used to. I used toflip them upside down. Yeah,
and it gets really cold and yeahit's like freezing on your arm, gay
frostbite. But yeah, I meanit stings a little. Oh yeah,
yeah I did. I definitely freezing. Well. I did it to myself
like three weeks ago. Let's justsee what happens if we do it on
the tip of our pinky for likethe entire game. How about I just
spray it on you. We'll findout what happens. We do it together.

(30:36):
No, that's what happens. We'resee what happens. No, we
are, I spray it. Yousee what happens. Deal, And then
you buy me chrumble cookie for beingthe test uptick though only a single,
just one cookie one Like I spentfive dollars on one cookie today. I
mean they're they're really they're five dollarson one cookie. Yeah, but they're

(30:59):
like really popular and really trendy.You know what I mean. Yeah,
But like I spent five dollars onone cookie, you have log tea bro
even like for a couple of bolbait's like eight dollars time out. First
of all, they asked me totip them. I didn't talk to a
single motherfucker. No, we usedthe computer. I think you do tip
the computer. I do not feelingsnow, but I don't know. I
said no tip because I didn't talkto a single person. You get it

(31:22):
to the AI, bro, theyhave feelings. Nah, bro, if
I'm not gonna talk to you,I'm not gonna tip. Like I don't
even know who you are. Getaway from me. Shoo shoe shoe back,
you know what I'm saying. Yeah, And then when I go when
I go get my cookie, theythink of it like it's a drug deal.
They open up the box. Hey, hey, you like this?
This is good? Hey? Andyou go yeah for sure, dude,
Yeah, yeah it was good.So they down the box. What happens

(31:45):
when you go to Crumble? I'mjust so that's my first time, dude.
It felt like I was doing adamn drug deal. Why do they
do it like that? I mean, I know, it seems like an
insane experience, like when you goin there and they just open the box
and they're like, you're like thatright, Like it's weird. Like I
burst it out laughing when I whenyou said, yeah, that's good.
Yeah, I mean, I don'tknow, I get created with it.
Sometimes the lady just popped up mycookie was like is this good? I

(32:06):
was like, yeah, I getthat. That's what I or a different
answer every time. I should tellher no. Next time I should tell
her no happens. I should tellher no, and I should punch the
cookie. I feel like the worldjust ends. Yeah, I'm gonna say,
someone opens a Crumble cookie box sayshow is it with the biggest smile
in your face? There was nosmile on that lady. She's pissed.

(32:27):
Bro, I would be too.That shift, bro, that shift that
ship. And the next time I'mgonna say no, and I'm just gonna
right to the cookie. Just officedoffice office on the cookie. You gotta
be an asshole, just be likeno, boom, just punch it.
Gotta boom it. Yeah, yougotta boom after saying no. Yeah,
it's the rudest thing you do toa person, bro, That one's not.
Yeah, it is because they're happyto show you those cookies. That

(32:50):
lady, you rather not showing thecookies and you go all the way home
and your cookie is already boomed.You know what I mean, I'd rather
you got to open it up likea briefcase. I appreciate the courtesy.
I just don't like how it wasa drug deal or what we should do
instead is next time they do it, we inspect them. We get yeah,
yeah, so long, we inspectthem for so long, like wait,
keep the box open, and thenwe just like genuinely like skin each

(33:14):
cookie we get like some sweezers.Let's go back there. We'll get tongs.
We'll pick them up, we'll flipthem over, we'll see what's going
on behind flip them over. We'llget a magnifying glass. We'll go like
this to of them, to reallysee what's inside of them. You also
got a cold cookie this time.You weren't expecting that. No, I
thought it was gonna be a warmcookie, and I was a little upset.

(33:35):
Yeah, I forgot to tell you. I should have warned you about
that. Yeah, I wanted somethingwarm, But it's okay. They're still
very yummy and good. I gaveyou warm cookie. You did give me
warm cookie, and I like thecheesecake, and I also gave him.
I also gave you the piece ofthe cold one. I do appreciate you.
I also took a secret bite aswell. Did you really? I
took a secret bite, that's thefine. After I finished my windows,
I took really small secret bite.I don't care. I'm sorry. I
want to just get that off mychest. But you had to got the

(33:59):
conscience? Did you really did?I've been thinking about this whole podcast.
Have you actually like my off myshoulders? Bro? I feel like the
like freest man ever that could saythat you that you actually felt so guilty
about that? You know what Imean? Shit, even though I did
spend five dollars on that cookie,it's Okay, that's okay. I wish
I had a megaphone so I cantell people how much I spent on that

(34:21):
damn cookie. Just one more timewith the megaphone. God, it's gonna
be so how how much I spenton the cookie? Come on down to
Crumble and get yourself a five dollarscookie. That's right, one cookie for
five dollars, completely overpriced and madeto your satisfaction. I don't know what
do you want me to do this? That was beautiful? Yeah, I
try to make it sound cheery.It did. It did sound cheer I

(34:42):
should have never made it sound cheery. You shouldn't. You should have been
like a cheery dish. You shouldhave been like, did you want to
spend five dollars on a cookie?Now? Good? Don't go to Crumble
cookie because you're gonna spend an armin a lake and they're gonna treat it
like a drug deal. Gotcha?That was great? There you go,
fantastic? Do you like my commerciallips? I did? Well? You

(35:07):
know the only thing we missed onthat was just like the fine print when
they talk really really don't even tryno way, it is a little make
sure you were eighteen years older,please sign it with the preasure idea.
Dude, they speak so fast,I can't say, I can't do it.
I don't know how they have to, like, they probably say it

(35:27):
really slow and speed up their voice. That's exactly because, dude, that's
crazy. I listened to Oh myGod, that's insane all the way up
to my twenty like twenty right now, right now July like forty five.
I have never thought of that thisentire time. I thought they were just
talking so fast, like the Mexicanson the radio, you know what I

(35:50):
mean, because they'd be talking hellafast, Puerto Ricans too, And then
you got the dudes who were likethe It took my one. It took
one point second point one second forme to think about that. Yeah,
don't, don't, don't. Idon't. I didn't say that first part,
the first part, the zero pointone seven second or whatever. The
I just said, I don't know. I said something really stupid, and
then I fixed it by saying,oh you did yeah, very good,

(36:13):
very good. I should have justlet it been what I should have said.
Nothing. You didn't even notice Itried, You really didn't. Yeah,
yeah, you have to look onyour face for you're like, oh,
this guy's an idiot. I didnot know. Yeah, I didn't
even understand what you said. Thankgod, I know. I was too
busy about like talking about the fasttalking Mexicans on the radio, and who
are the other guys to the oneswho do like what's auctions? Oh yeah,

(36:36):
dude, they talked really fast,like people five dollars, five dollars,
dollars, ten dollars they hit itwith let me get it, yeah,
let me let me, let meget a fifty to get stutter like,
I can't even try it. Eminem, they're all eminem. Eminem thinks
he's cool, but in reality,there's like a thousand auction people that could
probably spent every song he's ever made. An auction guy can make rap,

(37:00):
you know what I mean? Hereally could, and he just starts going,
you know who knows that. Idon't know if I would say the
Alex because I can't vouch for him. Taylor, Alex, Yes, how
did you know? That second guessis insane? Taylor was going to be
my first guest, But I waslike, actually that's something Alex would know.
Yeah, no, dude, Alex. Actually Alex would know, like
the he could probably recite the kronor something like that. Like he's huge

(37:22):
into that kind of stuff, youknow what I mean? Or like maybe
if you ask him, like torecite like and Frank's diary, he could
probably tell you that. He's probablycould. He likes books, dude,
he's a book really. I thinkhe's a book nerd. I really don't
know you're saying that because he's baldand wear it has glasses. I know.
Wow, that's crazy that that's actuallycrazy that you admitted to that.
He seems like he uses a pieceof bacon as a bookmark of bacon.

(37:44):
Yeah, like a real piece ofif that makes sense? Does that make
sense at all? You know whatI mean? I feel like he can
imagine it. You can imagine it, imagine I'm due. Yes, I
can definitely feel like it's a prettyexotics a bookmark, but it would also
be perfeca. It has to bea little saugy. So when you slamed
the book close, No, I'mthinking I didn't think about that because I

(38:05):
was thinking about like the most crispiestpiece of bacon. Alex just texting me,
that's so funny. You know whatYou're talking about saying it's just live.
Yeah. No, he texted meyou on something question mark, No,
ask him if he has bacon.Oh my god, I read the
first three things you get to sayin the group jets, just like,
what the fuck? Wow? Yeah? No, yeah, yeah, that

(38:29):
was crazy. That's just a It'sone way to express how much you want
to play video game. It is. Speaking of video games, n Cuba
twenty five just came out today.Yeah, I don't know why I keep
game. For those who are wondering, are you stupid? It's National Hockey
League Game twenty twenty five. Who'sexcited? Lightning Go, Lightning bolts?
What do you mean for? I'mbeing so not for Okay, okay,

(38:51):
we were. I was so confused. I was like, wait, he
being so dead ash Right, now, you know this this game I've been
waiting for for eleven years. It'sbeautiful. I've played one game of it
so far, and then we startedrecording this podcast. But it's beautiful.
I want to let me stop.You want to I want to sleep with
that video game. That's not whatI was gonna say at all. I
mean, it's a lot better thanprobably what you were gonna say. Yeah,

(39:12):
a lot cleaner, A lot cleaner, even though it's sleeping with the
video game. If it was aperson, I guess pull a Juicy J
song. What Juicy J? Idon't know who that is. I guess
you do know Juicy J is.Yes, you do Juicy J. I
mean yeah, I know that onesingular song. No, you know multiple

(39:36):
Juicy J songs? Yeah, youknow a dark Horse by Katie Perry.
Yeah you know Juicy J. Thenreally, it's insane. Never heard of
the name Juicy J. Yes,hold on, I don't know any other
Juicy J songs, hold on starkHorse and no, he has a couple
other Oh he has that song youknow on TikTok where it's like, I'm
just thinking with my dick, ma, that's awesome. What bands make her

(40:01):
dance? Bands to make her dance? Oh? Bands maker? Yeah?
Yeah? All these chicks clapping,she ain't using hay yeah that one.
Yeah, what are you saying?What are the lyrics? All these chicks
clapping before that? She ain't usinghands? Bands to make her dance?
Oh yeah, she's just making sure. Why I don't because it didn't sound
like bands to make her dance?When you said it the first time.

(40:22):
Oh yeah, I'm trying. Ithink those are like all his big songs.
I thought you said dance to makeher dance, and I was like,
I guess that's the clean version.Oh yeah, yeah he has okay,
yeah, he's yeah, he hassome big songs. Yeah, he
has some big song. You knowwho Juicy j Is? I guess I
know who Juicy j is. Yeah. If I could play about an ADVID
listener, Juicy Jays what I said, like, in twenty thirteen, he
was popping. I guess, sowho was popping for me in twenty thirteen.

(40:45):
I can't remember twenty thirteen music wise. I think it was like the
old High Spies out of thing?Is that twenty thirteen? No, that
was like twenty sixteen? Really wasit? Really? I don't even know.
Oh so then that means twenty thirteen, the only thing I had to
that I could use to listen tomusic was like the very iPod. Yeah,
the iPod Yeah, And I onlyhad like twenty two songs really yeah,
and one of them was eminem I'mNot Afraid And that was like the

(41:07):
only song that everything sucked. Befhow did I go? Everybody? Everybody?
Oh my God. Yes, theguy that sang that in the airport.
Yeah, dude, do you knowwhat I'm talking about? The guy
that sang that in the airport,The guy who sang that in the airport.
Yes, he had a complete mentalbreakdown and out of nowhere, he
just slammed his phone and it shatteredand he went, I'm not afraid,

(41:31):
Jake is stand You never seen that. I've never seen dude. I'm gonna
post on the dude problem Instagram,Instagram podcast, Instagram whatever, Yeah something,
Yeah, dude podcast, problems,Instagram something, it's the Problems podcast.
Yeah, it's something. It's something. It's one of those it's it's
one of those seven options I justgave you. But go check it out

(41:51):
on Instagram. I'll go post it. It's a great video. I'm excited
to see it. I'll show you, right. I think that song,
which is really appealing to me becausethe lyric was I'll put my dick in
the earth and from the whole universe, and I at the time I thought
that bar was absolutely insane. Thatis putting your dick in the earth.
Yeah, that's a bar, Bro, That's that's insane. That was insane.
Yeah, No, that is insane. I can only imagine. Yeah,

(42:15):
I as a kid, I tookthat very literal. I thought he
did it. Yeah it No,no, no, I thought he did
it. You didn't do it.No, I thought he did it.
Okay. I thought when you saidthat you took it literal, that meant
that you did it. No,no, no, no no no no.
I just remember. I just rememberafter after school we would be running
the track because they had like thislittle running thing, and you were like,
I wonder what Eminem is. AndI would listen to that song and

(42:37):
he would be like my dick intoearth, and I'd be like, damn,
he really did stick his whole dickin the earth. Yeah, that's
crazy, I guess. So.Yeah, No, that's probably the one
song I could recite from Eminem,like the entire song. I've never really
I don't listen to any other Eminemsongs. I'm not really big. Back
in the day, I used to. I used to be able to to

(42:58):
uh that wants on Lose Yourself.I knew the whole thing to lose yourself.
That's an Eminem song. Yeah,yes, yeah, I didn't know
that. You ever seen the movieeight Mile? Oh? We should watch
eight mile. It's literally eight mileeminem doing the freestyles. Yes, yes,
then I have seen it. Yeah, fantastic movie. That's the song
that's in there. Yeah yeah,I see, I see, I see.

(43:22):
That's like the main song to it. Yeah, okay, then you
should watch that movie because you veryclearly don't remember that movie. We should
watch it. No, I don't. I don't really clearly remember that movie.
Is the rat battle in front ofthe crowd, you know, it's
a it's a very good that's that'slike the ending exactly. It's all that
matters. I mean, yeah,that was the best part of the movie.
I don't remember. But he getslike jumped in him like it's a

(43:42):
good movie. Really. Yeah,we should watch it, Eminem who plays
it? Yeah? He plays himself. I'm not interested? Are you serious?
Right? No? I'm sorry?Why is he good actors? Yes?
He literally plays himself. He's great, Like I played myself in movie.
You sounded like him right there?That was crazy. That was actually
like really good. But again,do that again? Yeah, do that

(44:06):
again? What should I say?Give me something to say? I need
I need a good bar. Giveme a good bar. Let's think of
a good bar and I'll attend tosay I can't. I don't know.
You just need to think of likeone sentence two sentences that have the same
like a rhyming word. Eminem wouldprobably be like, I put my knife
to my tour, I want togo so far. I put my knife
to her throat, and then Iwant to go so far, but I
won't drive the car. Yeah,it's something like that. That's a rocket

(44:30):
ship over to the stars. That'san awfully hot coffee pot, awfully hot
coffee pot. You remember when hesaid that, I don't you don't you
don't remember that meme? No.The only thing that I remember seeing like
a video of emminem bro Like,the only thing is when he was in
that movie with Dave Franco and SethRogan and he said he was gay,
then say he was gay. Yeah, yeah, I did see that.

(44:52):
I've never seen the movie. Justseen that clip. I forgot the movie.
I forgot the movie. Yeah,I know it was banned at one
point because the like gay North Korea. Who knows, like way bigger.
So the interview some guy had theinterview. Some guy played like Kim Jong
h. Yeah, the dude fromjunk was like the Asian guy who's in
everything played fucking Kim Jon, theAsian guy that's and everything. There's like

(45:13):
three of those. He's like,you have to do who he's like everything?
Funk? What's this dude? Thename Jimmy Wou Jimmy Wou? Who
Jimmy Jimmy Wo. That's not hisAh, that's that's not his real name.
That's Randall Park. Is his realname, Randall Park. That can't
be his name. There's no waythat's his name. Randall Park, Random

(45:38):
Park, Random Park? Is this? That? Is that really his real
name? Oh my god? Thatis his real name. He's an Asian
guy. Sorry, he's a nameguy named Randall. Yeah, I'm sorry.
That just really threw me off.That's okay. Look, I mean,
like, you know, you knowthat guy, you know, he's

(45:58):
the thing is dude fifty. Youknow, it's like he's thirty five.
I was almost named Dakota. Socould you see that's a really white guy
thing though a lot of people saythat, you know what I mean all
the time, like you because likeyou're a hispan you look Hispanic, so
there's no way, Like, yeah, ever, when I when I think
of a Dakota. I think it'slike I instantly think of a zip a

(46:19):
puddy that's like camo and like asniper. So you said zip a poody.
For just a split second, Ithought you said, like, zipp
a puddy is zip I was like, what is a zip a puddy?
Like what is a zip a putty? Like? I was just like,
what the guys talking about zipp aputty? I think about a fall back
a little bit, and then Idefinitely really would be though I told you

(46:43):
I wasn't gonna let you drive.I wasn't gonna let you drive this chair.
This chair is, this chair mighthave seen the last of its days.
I won't lie. I wish,honestly, I would just go ahead
and take a picture just so wecould post it on the podcast or the
Instagram Instagram. I don't know whatour Instagram. Probably most possibly there might
be asking I better figure out thisInstagram, I know, plugging it.

(47:05):
Uh it's a great picture. Wowthat was horrible. Did I block it?
No? Not at all. I'msorry, guys. Wow, we
just we just don't care, doit? But no, listen, when
what the fuck is when I was? When I was being born? You
know, it's just a couple ofmonths after I was conceived. I guess
you could say you could say adDude's Problem podcast is what the instagram.
I was positive that's what it was. Yeah, I couldn't remember her dude

(47:29):
Problems podcast now I know. Yeah, my mom wanted to name me either
Austin or Dakota. My dad wantedto name me something Hispanic, like Juana
Jose. That's really weird. Yeah, I know. But then the Ultra
Saladar couldn't do that. When mymom went into like when they went into
like peep the pictures and ship,you know, the ultra sound and put

(47:49):
the jelly on your tommy and keepthe baby and ship. Yeah, she
was like they were arguing, peepgit brokeep gip it, gen z.
Doctor's gonna be crazy. Hey hey, peeping in a little again. This
is your legit right here. Hey, this is obviously he's very Jitty's legit.
He hit the gritty, He hitthe gritty, He hit the grit.

(48:10):
Hit He's going to be a bustfull night. Point do we hit
the will what do we hit thegood water? We hit what are we
doing? I don't know, dude, that's we're having fun, is all
we're talking. My point is isthe ultrasound nurse is the person who named
me. Really yeah, she waslike, my French name, their their
their kid Devin. And then theywere like, oh, it's sucking great,

(48:31):
that's a great name. I thinkboth my parents are just like Jayden.
Yeah, Jade's the cool name.Fuck it. Yeah, I mean
I like Jayden. Yeah. Ithink they playing I don't. I think
they both disagreed. Both of ushave very unisexual names. Actually, by
the way, no, I wouldsay Devin's a dude's name. No,
No, Devin's definitely a dude Iwould. So you want to know.
Can I tell you something though,that it is just because you met one

(48:52):
girl named Devin does not mean Devinthe girls. No, you look it
up. The I N. TheI N is supposed to be for females
and the and it is supposed tobe for males, and they're both pronounced
the exact same other than the ON can be pronounced devon if there was
like a fucking little like mark abovethe O as if it was French or
something like that. Other than that, that's how it is supposed to be.
And when the ultrasound nurse said thattheir friend had a kid and named

(49:15):
the Devin. It was a girl. Guess what it was, Their daughter,
d e v i N, whichis why I was named d e
v i N. That's the onlygirl ever named Devan. Who's the only
girl ever named Devan? That ultrasoundfirst, Yeah, they're probably dead.
No, they're probably like fifty.You're not that old, right, Oh

(49:35):
No, they're like a year olderthan me. I act, I'm so
stupid. No, because they werejust born. She just named her,
and then I was born like twomonths after, So honestly, we're like
not definitely. Yeah, you guysare literally the same age. You guys
could be living in the same placeright now. It could have been Valentino
for all. You know, yousaid that like it would be weird if
we were dating for all. Ohwait, yeah, yeah, I didn't

(50:00):
think about that. Yeah, yougot me there, Good going, Champ.
What is this? Oh it's anIrish name? Interesting? Yeah?
Yeah. Devon is a uni sexEnglish language given name. It's for a
dude. The name Devon is agirl's name of Irish origin. Poet.
It means poet. Really, itmeans you're a poet. Yeah, you

(50:22):
don't have a way of words.Uh, you used far more for boys
with this spelling. And then it'sd v O And I'm telling you,
bro, dude, I'm telling youyou're tripping. Non binary? What non
binary name? It's just non bin. Just have to do it. That
is Devon a non binary name.And then Devon is a gender neutral baby

(50:42):
name of British, Irish and Frenchorigin. That's insane. I never,
that's insane. I met a lotof women with the name Jayden. Really.
Yeah. Is it always spelled theway that it's spelled for you?
No, there's so many ways spelled. My buddy spelled j j as my
buddy spells a J A d oh, And it's Jaydon. That's how I

(51:04):
would pronounce it, whether he likedit or not. That's how we do
pronounce it because I'm Jaden and he'sJada on, so we don't both say
this Jaden And he's like, whatfact not Jaden? No, He's yeah,
if I was you, I'd bepissed. If he was like,
I'm Jada, I'm like, no, you're not, I'm Jayden, You're
jay Don. No. No,No, he took the Jaydon pretty quick.
I mean, what are you goingto say to that? It's literally
how kid? Yeah exactly. Yeah. If it took him to like an
English teacher and then asked them,yeah, it's in the right You're always

(51:28):
going to be in the right one. Yeah, because yeah, because your
name is spelled like that, tryingto be French and ship. What are
you doing? I keep getting notificationssomeone's logging into your YouTube account. Yeah,
that's what it is. No,it's not I would know. It's
it's Big Bang Theory. Wedding Giftexplained. What Big Bang Theory Wedding Gift
explained? Like the TV show.Like the TV show, I was so

(51:50):
confused, Like wedding the episode wherethey are giving a wedding gift, I
really don't know. I don't knowwhy that's That's not what I meant.
What do you watch on YouTube?A bunch of random ship you? Honestly
what my first three recommended is onYouTube? I'm interested. I This podcast
fucking sucks. The one you're readingon your phone, not this one,
not one you're currently listening to.Cody co Situation is crazy. That's peing

(52:15):
Ones, Moist, Critical Love,Moist, Critical Funny, motherfucker. Ever.
Uh so this took me twenty twoyears to complete. The other lego
Batman, uh will Star Wars Battlefrontthree, Ever happen? The Smartest criminal
in History? Critical reacts, moisture, TV show movies twenty five, Biggest

(52:38):
features add to College Football twenty five. Ten things I want from MCU's Fantastic
four I don't get. Yours isYeah, yours is insane. That is
so like diverse though mineus just purelyfood and documentaries. Ten cut scenes removed
from RDR two. That's crazy.Yeah, it's a bunch of random shows.
It's a lot of video game stuff, though, I feel like those
of the main theme is like videogame stuff. The history video games are

(53:00):
just interesting things about video games.I feel like that's kind of what you're
going for, minus just food,food, and like explaining Squidward's house Swear
to Guyquidward's House is the title ofthis video exploring, Oh Squidward's home,
the Homer House. House. Itdoes a house. You didn't let me
see you too long, says housenow. It's yeah, says house now

(53:22):
when I see it. But earlieryou showed me for like one second it
looked like it could have possibly beenhome. Well, yeah, but that's
my YouTube. It's just a bunchof random shit. Why Lego Indiana Jones
failed. It's huge because me andyou have that situation where we just can't
do anything without having like background,and that's we always use YouTube. Bro

(53:42):
dude, not being able to eatwithout putting on a YouTube video. You
you know what I mean? Timeout quick. We it took us fifty
three minutes to talk about how Trumpgot shot in the damn ear? Trump
got shot in the ear? Howdo we not talk about that beforehand?
Because we were ranting about some otherbullshit dude that we we think of.
It took us that It took usfifty three minutes to talk about Trump.

(54:05):
That should have been the first thingwe talked about. The first thing we
talked about was Jaywalking six year old. Yeah she was stupid, but Trump
was. But that was so seriousfor you, it was you're the first
thing, dude, Did you seehow bad ass Trump he was holding the
fist up. He was like,I took that bullet, motherfucker. I've
seen so many already. I loveDonald Trump takes it back. Okay,

(54:28):
hold on, let me take backwhat I said, I love how Donald
Trump reacted. Let me fix that. Love how Donald Trump reacts. Yeah,
yeah, I love how he reactedbecause I thought that was I thought
he That's what I've seen a lotof people are making the video saying,
like, to be honest, whetheryou like Trump or not, everyone can
just admit that that picture is fuckingtough. Oh it's bad as I'm so
sorry. Yeah, like that picturewhat him the election? I saw something
where it said Biden has to comeout as bisexual to win the election,

(54:50):
and I thought that was the funniestshit in the world. I wouldn't think,
I mean, like, yeah,fuck, I don't honestly, at
this point, I don't think anybodywould care. No, I'm saying,
but yeah, but they're saying that'sthe only bide he could win. I
guess. I guess I think that'sabout as bisexual. What what the fuck
does that do for anything? That'smy point. I don't think it would
matter if he came out as bisexual. No, he would get He would
be like the first gay president.So they'd be like, oh, fact,

(55:14):
you know, they'd be huge.Yeah, yeah, you're right,
Biden. It's not like a normalperson like us yeah, exactly. Yeah,
no one gives a fuck with herwhat we think, but Righten does
it. People care about it,people care about him, you know.
But that that, I mean,that is insane. I mean, uh
what, Yeah, I was gonnasay two people bad, but one of

(55:35):
them well yeah, one of themwas a shooters in the stands. Also,
yeah, RPD, that was justfucking watching the rally and got both
of that. That wasn't cool.That's that's also insane. I found the
video of the guy who helped himactually is someone who Yeah, I also
saw that video kept him alive forquite a long Yeah, and the helicopter
came down again, there's a brainmatter on him and ship. Yeah.
Crazy. And the pictures of thestands actually pretty gruesome situation, dude.

(55:59):
The the picture of the way there'sa picture of the stands where that I
haven't seen it. I haven't seenthe pictures or Anything's blood all over there.
I'm sure there is. People thoughtit was stage too, that's crazy.
You can't stage a civilian. Sothat's like the the Yeah, I
agree also on that, but that'slike one of the so many theories that
are going on right now. Likethey said, it was political stunt.

(56:21):
No, it's a bunch of bullshit. And then they said that the guy
that was that was killed on topof the roof wasn't actually the actual shooter
and that it was someone else becausethat guy made the video of saying you
got the wrong guy. It's yeah, it's a ton of shit. It's
a ton of shit. No,it's it's a bunch of bullshit. Oh,
and then you have the I don'tknow, you've probably seen this one.
I mean, it's all a bunchof bullshit. This is also one

(56:42):
bunch of bullshit. But there's thisgentleman. I forgot his name, a
big call from Jayden here, Yeah, big, I forgot his name.
But he is. People say thathe's JFK Jr. People say that he's
JFK Sun, So he would beJohn John F John Ly. I'm pretty
sure it wasn't he already jor Ireally don't know. All I know is
JFK Junior died on a plane crasha long time ago. Oh that's who

(57:07):
I'm thinking about, the late nineties. Yeah, that's who I'm thinking about.
Yeah, and people think that hefaked his death and that this is
him and he was at the Trumprally. Because when you look up the
video of this, and this isa very well known man. People have
been going around saying he's JFK's JFKjunior for a long time. He was
just standing in the in the stands. When Trump got shot, everyone was
like freaking out, and he wasjust standing in there like with his two

(57:28):
hands in front of his crotch basicallyand just did not move. He didn't
duck down. He just completely stoodup the entire time. And then when
everyone was getting hyped, he alsodid not like yell or get hyped out
all. He just sat there andit's super weird, just completely still was
flying all the time. Secret Service. Yeah, so I'm not feeding into
this. I don't. I'm notgonna say that's just insane. I can

(57:51):
say who is what? Who itwas? I know he don't listen to
the podcast, but he probably doesn'teven know where I have one or we
have one. But he came upto me whispered in my ear, he
goes, I think the Clinton's it. I was like, what, really,
he goes, I think the Clinton'sdead. It. There was a
this was about the Trump shooting situation. I also heard that theory as well.
Really that's like a real thing.So it's real theory. Its theory.

(58:14):
You don't even understand what is Clintondoing. That's my point. The
Clintons wanted to like kill JFK.So that's that whole theory, which is
obviously like disproved, but people stillbelieve it. It's like a huge occult
situation and like now people are likethe Clinton are back and trying to kill
drump Yes, it's insane, that'scrazy. There's a lot of insaneh there's
time traveler theories, now you knowwhat I mean. Okay, well,
now that's just obviously obviously, butthat was also a thing for like JFK.

(58:38):
That was no one was saying timetravelers where they were? Why did
you say it like that? Wherethey were? I don't think they were.
I mean, it's it's it's obviouslya stretch is to reach you know
what I mean. But there's likethose black and white photos where they like
put some like futuristic looking dude inthere and then all so just making black

(59:00):
and white and then they're like,yo, holy ship, he speak in
fact, dude, Thomas cook whatwas his name, Thomas Cooks? Yeah,
that sounds like a YouTube. ThomasCooks, Thomas, that's a ut
crook. Crook. Okay, becauseThomas cook sounds like a YouTube Channet,
you know Thomas Crooks. Thomas Crooksis now in the same conversation as Harvey
Lee Atwald. Harvey Lee Otswald,that's the dude who killed h Yes he

(59:23):
is? Yes, what's you?My face killed? Wats my face?
He killed? Once? He killedsomebody? Who did he kill JFK?
I really don't know. I don'tknow. I don't know. I'm not
actually smarter. You don't know whohe is. But I know all the
all the theories that they've been sayingabout that entire thing is is fucking insane.

(59:45):
It's really it's I gotta find outbefore the end this podcast. Who
Lee hardly argued a lot of this. There was something that I was gonna
say about the situation. He didkill JFK? I was right? Was
JFK? He's the snapper of JFK? Yes, that's all that's a video.
Oh my god. I sounded likePaul Barr. What the fun I
could do that? That's awesome,Paul Bear. I don't know who that

(01:00:07):
is. I'll show you a familyguy. No South Parky for none of
those shows. Yes, I cando it so good. That's so crazy.
No, it's not the same.You do it. I can't now
do it right now? No,do it right now? No I don't.
I don't do your wishes on command. Do it right now, and
we'll do it together. I justwant to do it with you to see

(01:00:27):
if we match. No, well, harmonize here, how about I show
you? I show you no,because I don't care. I just want
to do it together. No,best, nice, I'll show you.
I'll show you what he sounds like? Who the Paul? How do?
Oh? There? It is allright? You ready? I'm here for

(01:00:52):
it. Ship that's an ad thatgot really really loud and so long copyrighted.
We're finished, bro, dude,where done? Go down? Oh
my god? Yeah? Just oit's great. Who it's just it's tall
bear. You're so easily entertained.I love you. It's so funny.

(01:01:15):
Thank you. Yeah. I'm reallygoing to be doing that the rest of
the night, practicing like I didn'tknow I could be, Like Paul Barry,
you're gonna get like a karaoke machineso you can get them. I
already have a karaoke machine, buddytoo, Buddy, get buddy, it's
not really a karaoke machine. It'sjust like a microphone that you can use.
Carry of those kid microphones. No, it's like a fucking actual microphone.

(01:01:37):
If the ones that light up andsing Dora songs. Yeah, it's
like dance dance revolution and ship likethat with it. I'm slamming a weight
so hard. You've been messing witha ten pound weight this entire time.
I know I have. It's justbeen in my hand. I know you've
been throwing it. You've been throwingit, I have been. I've been
stroking it. Yeah, yeah,this entire time. It sucks that because

(01:01:59):
if we were, if we wererecording, people would be able to see
you stroking the ten pound weight.Stop it, yeah, stop stop speaking.
Time we had the camera, theycould see you stroking. They could
the ten pounds weight. Shut thefunk off. What are we talking about
this time? Yeah? I know, but you can take that out of

(01:02:21):
context so bad. That was thepoint. That was the point. It's
just yeah, man, turn onthe camera. You see that man stroking
that, than we need to getmonetizers. Stroke that thing, cuzo this
is another video that you've seen likeyears ago that no one else knows about
you. You were just I knowI was. It's so funny. I

(01:02:45):
feel like you could say absolutely anythingin front of Jayden and he's seen a
video that like something happens. Youknow what I mean. Yeah, I
have stroked that thing. Cuz.Oh, it's like this old guy on
two K playing with a bunch ofyoung guys. This guy shoots at three
in the in the o G comesto you like shoot that dang cuzo and

(01:03:05):
then and all the kids are like, wall is so funny, this dude.
I have so many videos to showyou after this podcast. It's gonna
be great. All right, everyone, have a great day. I love
you. We hope you enjoyed thepodcast. I have one never buy a
five dollars crumble cookie