June 29, 2025 • 34 mins
Segment 1: Amber Banda interviews Scott Brown, Executive Director for Ruck Up & Recover. This veteran-focused non-profit supports those who have served by making mental healthcare and essential resources more accesible. They will be raising funds to send veterans on mental retreats, starting here in the El paso area.
For more information go to RuckUpRecover.org
If you are or think a veteran is in crisis, please call 988.
Segment 2: Amber Banda interviews Mary Ramirez, Early Childhood Services Program Director, and Aldo Gardea, Licensed Clinical Social Worker, for the HOPES Program with the El Paso Center for Children.
.
The HOPES Program from the El Paso Center for Children is a FREE resources for parents and caregivers of kids ages 0-5. This program helps with behavioral health services, therapies on how to connect with your child, helps to enhance the attachment bond between caregiver and child, and so much more. earn about a simple balloon game that can help build trust, why the first 5 years are so important, and the importance of giving yourself grace as a parent.
.
For more information go to eppccinc.org > services > early childhood
You can also call 915-500-4105
For more information go to RuckUpRecover.org
If you are or think a veteran is in crisis, please call 988.
Segment 2: Amber Banda interviews Mary Ramirez, Early Childhood Services Program Director, and Aldo Gardea, Licensed Clinical Social Worker, for the HOPES Program with the El Paso Center for Children.
.
The HOPES Program from the El Paso Center for Children is a FREE resources for parents and caregivers of kids ages 0-5. This program helps with behavioral health services, therapies on how to connect with your child, helps to enhance the attachment bond between caregiver and child, and so much more. earn about a simple balloon game that can help build trust, why the first 5 years are so important, and the importance of giving yourself grace as a parent.
.
For more information go to eppccinc.org > services > early childhood
You can also call 915-500-4105
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to El Paso Public Forum, a weekly half hour
public affairs presentation of iHeartRadio El Paso for over twenty years,
featuring local news and interviews of interest to our listeners
in West Texas and southern New Mexico. All views and
opinions expressed on this program are those of the host
and guest, and not necessarily those of iHeartRadio Management and
now El Paso Public Forum.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Welcome to the l Paso Public Forum. I'm your host,
Amber Banda, and today we have Scott Brown. He is
the executive director of Rock Up and Recover. Scott, thank
you for being here with me today.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
Thank you for having me. I'm glad to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
You look very dapper in your cowboy hat. I love it.
You were just because you know we were recording the
KHY station, right.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
That's right. Well, I did grow up on a ranch,
so I do wear it a lot, but not normally
you did.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
I'm very jealous of that too, But that's another conversation
for another day. So Rock Up and Recover this is
a very new nonprofit organization. Scott, can you tell the
listening audience what is Rock Up and Recover?
Speaker 3 (00:59):
Absolutely? So, we launched on Memorial Day of this year,
twenty twenty five, so just about a month ago. Myself
and another veteran, Dan Tesky, who is the CEO of
Damascus Gaming, and my wife who knows that I have
my military drama and mental health issues, we started this
organization and what we do is number one, we help
(01:21):
veterans sign up for their benefits. We help get them
into health care, we help get their claim started, things
like that, and we put them in touch with other
veteran organizations to help them get those things pushed through.
But the bigger thing that we do is we take
them on mental health reset retreats. So we take them
to places like the mountains of California, the mountains of Colorado,
(01:45):
and up in Cloudcroft here in New Mexico. Those are
the three places we do right now. We take them
for a week, we turn off the Wi Fi and
we just have a big mental health reset. We go
on hikes, and all of this is paid for for
the airfare. We cook very good meals for them, meals
that they wouldn't get at home. We cook over campfires.
(02:08):
We do a lot of things, archery, acts, throwing, we
play games and we just sit there and get to
know each other and talk about what issues we have.
And then we also talk about nonsense and we tell
inappropriate jokes because that's what veterans do.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
Hey, yeah, I mean I you know, I come from
the biker world, a lot of veterans there, and I
love the inappropriate jokes as long as they're not geared
towards me. So if with Rock Up and Recover, when
you take them on these reset retreats, about how many
veterans do you take and are their spouses welcome as
well or is it just the veterans.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
So the spouses can go on their own retreats. We
do include spouses, but we take just the veterans and
we only take male or female. So if there are
male spouses, and there are some, they are welcome to
come with the male veterans and that group. If there
are female spouses, they are welcome to go with the
female veterans in their group. And we like to keep
(03:01):
them separate because men don't like to talk in front
of women and women don't like to talk in front
of men.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Yeah, exactly. And for this brand new organization, it is national.
I mean, it's not just here in all passes. So
I mean, I have been a part of a few nonprofits.
I've never started one myself. But before we get into
more of the meat and potatoes of ruck Up and Recover,
I'm very curious, like, how do you how do you
do it all? Like, how do you, you know, create
this national organization?
Speaker 3 (03:26):
So there's another organization that does this, and they're a
very good organization. It's how I learned about it. I
went on one of their retreats. But their's is geared
towards they have a religious background, and a lot of
people don't want to do that, and I am religious,
and I have no problem with that, but I want
(03:48):
everyone to be able to come. I want Jewish veterans
to be able to come, Muslim veterans to be able
to come. I want LGBTQ veterans to be able to
come and not have to worry about that particular type
of judgment. So ours is open to any veteran. If
they want to talk to me or another veteran about religion,
(04:10):
they're more than welcome to. But there's no bottom line
of that. It's not going to be forced upon them.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
And you being a veteran, and you know you just
said that you went on a similar retreat more with
a religious aspect. How do you feel that these retreats
would help veterans, Like what kind of change did you
personally see after you went on that retreat.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
So number one, you get a mineral health reset. And
it's great because you have no WiFi. WiFi has turned
off for twenty three hours a day. There's no cell
signal where we go, so we're out there. We do
have Wi Fi for emergencies, but it's very it's very relaxed.
If you want to go on the hike, you can,
but you don't have to. If you want to do
(04:53):
some work on the ranches we go to or the
outfits that we go at, we do a little project.
If you want to do that, you can, but you
don't have to. So if you want to in California
hike down to the families huge cemetery that they have
on their ranch and look at their headstones, you can
do that, but you don't have to. There's very little
things that we really force you to do. The only
thing that you have to do is every night we
(05:15):
sit around the campfire and we talk thirty forty five
minutes about whatever. But most of the time mental health
comes up, I might push it towards that direction a
little bit.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
I mean, that's the whole point exact.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
And at the end of the week, we want to
leave something behind, some challenge that they're facing. Maybe it's
a problem in their marriage, maybe it's a problem with
their kids, maybe it's a mental health issue that they
don't want to talk to their spouse about. And we
want to number one, point them in the right direction
to get them help, whether it's through the VA community care, however,
we're going to do that, and we do have therapists
that can work with them or I'm sorry, and also
(05:53):
leave that behind. We write it down, nobody reads it.
They can read it out loud if they want to
the group, but they don't have to. Yeah, and we
throw it in the fire, and that's how we're gonna
leave it behind. So we come back refreshed and ready
to fight a new day.
Speaker 2 (06:08):
I love that. I always talk about when it comes
to talking about mental health. I learned the term brain dumping,
where you just write it doesn't have to be correct grammar,
it doesn't have to be correct pronunciation, whatever you want.
Just write it down the paper and it's good to burn.
Speaker 4 (06:20):
It.
Speaker 2 (06:20):
You know, in your case, you may have a specific
thing that you want them to focus on when they're writing.
That way they can burn it and leave it behind.
And I think that that's amazing. So just more about
the power of writing, and I'm really impressed that you
include that in these retreats. And so do you have
any specific retreat dates coming up, especially for the people here?
And I'll passle.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
So the first one is gonna be geared towards the
people in I'll passo, okay, because we haven't done one yet.
We are currently raising funds. It costs about between depending
on how you do it, two and three thousand dollars
to do these retreats per person per person, because it
includes the food, the lodging, and the airfare. This first
one we're not gonna have a lot of airfare because
we're gonna gear towards better here in El Paso, in
(07:02):
the Borderland area, and we're gonna go to Cloudcraft. So there,
there's gonna be very and and we're gonna bust them.
Nobody's gonna drive because we want to all go up together.
We want to meet here and start the project here,
and we're gonna bring them back and end it here.
So we're looking at some time in the fall. It's
really a little too hot right now, and we're we're
(07:24):
raising funds, so we're looking at some time in the
September October time range. But that's that's gonna be our
first one, and we're taking ol Paso veterans. They can
go to our website, which is Rock Up Recover dot
org and register there. They can sign up, they can
send me an email from there and we will put
them on the list. There is no disqualifications. You do
(07:46):
not have to be diagnosed with a mental health issue,
you do not have to be a disabled veteran. You
just have to have a d D two fourteen and
you can come. There's no age limits, there's nothing.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
That's amazing. Again, if you're just joining us. I have
Scott Brown, he's the executive director for Rock Up and Recover.
So you were talking about these mental health resets, these retreats,
and right now you're in the process of fundraising, trying
to gather enough funds anywhere from two to three thousand
per person. The first one focused here for Al Paso
(08:19):
veterans and surrounding areas. Cloud Craft sometime in the fall
September October. So what I want to talk about for
a little bit is the fundraising part of it. That's
all everything. There's two things that every nonprofit needs. It's
volunteers and it's fun. So can you tell the listening
audience how can they help? How can they help you? Fundraise?
Speaker 3 (08:39):
Absolutely on the website there is. It pops up as
soon as you log in there. It pops up and
you can donate that way. You can also send me
an email. We take in kind donations as well. You know,
maybe a bus company wants to loan us a bus,
or loan us a driver and a bus to drive
up there and then come pick us up on Friday
(09:00):
and drive us back. Things like that. It doesn't have
to be cash. Also, volunteers obviously, especially those who have
maybe a mental health background, not necessarily have gone to
school for it, but understand it. Maybe they're the spouse
of a veteran, or they're a veteran who's had some
challenges and is willing to come up and talk about
(09:21):
those challenges for a day or even stay the whole week.
So those are the types of things that we're looking for. Again,
it's two to three thousand dollars. This one that we're
gonna the inaugural one maybe a little cheaper because there's
no airfare, but normally it's two to three thousand dollars.
And it really does help. And you've seen the federal
(09:42):
government come out and say, hey, we're going to give
the VA this money to concentrate on mental health. We
don't necessarily see that money. We may in the future,
but right now we don't. It's a great thing that
the VA is doing. But depending on what study you
look at, there's between eighteen and twenty two veterans and
or active duty soldiers that commit suicide per day on average,
(10:06):
and the whole goal of the federal government and these
types of organizations is to lower that number to zero. Potentially,
it's going to take a while to get there. There's
a lot of things broken in the healthcare system. But
this is a project that we hope to help veterans
understand that there are people that still need them and
(10:29):
want them here on this planet for the rest of
their natural days.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
And I'm going to ask you on a more personal note,
I mean, when people start these kind of nonprofits or foundations,
they have a huge drive to right, obviously, So why
did you want to start this? What did you see?
What did you feel was the importance of starting this.
Speaker 3 (10:51):
I've seen veterans who have committed suicide, I've known them,
and it's not something that you want to live through.
And certainly the families of those veterans are even greatly
more affected. And we want to make sure that these
veterans and these spouses and these other family members know
(11:12):
that there's more to live for. And we also want
to get the general public to know what the signs
are to look for. There's actually a Veteran crisis line.
It's nine eight eight, just like nine to one one,
but nine eight eight. Anybody can call that number to
report a veteran and in crisis. It doesn't have to
be a veteran or the family member. If a neighbor
(11:35):
knows a veteran and knows that they're having problems, and
it doesn't even need to necessarily be mental health. It
could be maybe a potential homeless issue or an addiction issue.
They can call that number and the VA will send
someone out or make a phone call and try to
contact that veteran to get them the help that they need.
Eight nine eight eight.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
And in the meantime, while you're raising funds and as
this gets to be a bigger thing and you're taking
more people on these retreats, you also provide resources and
lists and phone numbers and context to veterans in the
meantime Rock up recover dot org. They can contact you
through there if they have any questions about that.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
Absolutely, and every week we put more information in there.
We have blog posts in there as well, and we're
going to be starting in the near future, which will
be on the website a podcast. Myself and Dan Tasky,
one of the other directors, will be starting a podcast
to just talk about all things veterans. There may be
or may not be some inappropriate jokes that are told.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
There are I mean, I think the listening audience only
knows like half of my personality, because you know, I
like the inappropriate jokes sometimes and the colorful language as
I call it. But you know, Scott, I just really
want to thank you, first of all, thank you for
your service, thank you for being vulnerable, thank you for
creating something like this because a lot of times veterans,
(12:55):
you know, I guess whatever the I mean. I am
not from a military background, I had some military family members,
but it seems to me the picture I get and
a lot of people get, is they're from the military.
They don't want to talk, especially if they have a
military background, about their feelings. You know, it's not just
they're a man. Men in general don't like to talk
about mental health, but especially when they're a veterans. So
(13:15):
I just want to say thank you for creating this,
thank you for talking about the importance of mental health
with veterans and their families. And you think about their children.
You know that what you were saying about the suicide rate,
you know, it's just scarily high, and you got to
think about the families that are left behind. So what
I would like to ask you as a final question,
is what would you like to tell all the veterans
(13:37):
that may be listener, maybe someone that can relay this
message or share the link, because this is a podcast
that will be shareable. What would you like to tell
them to just say, Hey, it's okay to ask for help,
it's okay to reach out, we want you here.
Speaker 3 (13:49):
It's one hundred percent okay to ask for help. I
am a manly, manly man, and it is.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
Easy, very manly we're posting pictures on our social It took.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Me years to understand that it's okay to talk about
these problems. And I want to use my experience to
let others know. Don't let it take you years. You
can talk to your spouse. Your spouse wants to talk
to you. I assure you. You can talk to your parents.
If you're younger and you don't have a spouse, you
can talk to the VA. The VA has made leaps
(14:21):
and bounds improvements in their mental health program. Is it perfect? No,
no program is, but they are trying their hardest. They
want to help. I want to help. Amber wants to help.
Ask for help, Ask for help, get it out there
that you want help, that you need help, and don't
be afraid to reach out and get that help.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
And if there if you feel honestly, because I mean
I I have PTSD, I wasn't in the war anything,
but I did have my war going on as a kid.
If you feel like there's no one that you can
reach out to, journaling like we talked about it, and
you're just write it down, get it out of your head.
It's not a cure all, but it does help.
Speaker 3 (14:56):
Well, you know, there's another thing on the nine eight eight.
You can also text that number. Some people don't like
to talk. You can text that number and a mental
health therapist will respond within a minute or two and
they will talk to you via text. Oh wow, you
do not have to call them. It's the most awesome program.
(15:16):
I've seeing the VA come out with it a long time. Yes,
so I know a lot of people prefer to text.
Do that instead.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
Again, call or text that veteran crisis number nine eight eight.
You do not have to be the veteran. You do
not have to be related to the veteran. You just
have to see a veteran in need nine to eight eight.
To show people you care, Rock up Recover dot org
and again you can go to power on two point
one Sunday ninety nine point nine or ninety six point three.
K Hey Country on our Instagram and Facebook, this information
(15:45):
will be there. We'll have a picture of Manly Man
Scott and if you want any questions you can also
reach us on there. Scott, thank you so much for
being here with me today.
Speaker 3 (15:52):
Thank you, I really appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Welcome to the public Forum. I'm your host, Amber Banda,
and today we are joined by Mary Ramirez. She's the
early childhood Services program director for the HOPES program at
All Passal Center for Children. Mary, thank you for being
here with me today.
Speaker 5 (16:14):
Thank you for having me of course.
Speaker 2 (16:15):
And we also have Aldo garadea licensed clinical social worker
and karaoke extraordinary. He is also part of the Hopes
program for al Passal Center for Children. Although, thank you
for being here with me.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
Today, thank you for having us pleasure.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
You're gonna do some Whitney Houston for us later on, Right,
he's excited about that. Right, I'm excited about that too.
So we are going to be talking today specifically about
the HOPES program. Now, I've had the al Passal Center
for Children on here. You guys have multiple things, multiple
programs for the community. But this specific program, HOPES program
is aimed for children age five and under and of
(16:52):
course their caretakers, their parents. So Mary, let me have
you talk a little bit about the programs there at
at the center.
Speaker 5 (17:00):
Right. So we've been with the Apasso County for now
going ten years, eleven years. Yeah, so you know it's
been a lot about parenting support classes we do provide
parents as teachers, incredible years, circle of security, behavior health,
which is a going to talk about a little bit
more right now. And then we also provide parent cafes.
(17:23):
So everything falls under the Hopes umbrella and they all
for free. Services are for free. We don't ask for
any type of income, any documentation. As long as the
parent or parents have a child under the age.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
Of five, that's amazing. Okay, So the HOPES program is
about ten years old, but because the All Pascal Center
for Children has been around for a while.
Speaker 5 (17:43):
Over one hundred years.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Okay, there you go. That makes more sense. So if
you do want more information on all of those programs,
and we'll touch a little bit about all of them,
you know, like like Mary was saying, we're going to
talk about behavior a little bit with al Tho, the
Behavioral Health Services, Parents' Teachers program, the Incredible Years program,
which I was telling you earlier is a really nice
way of saying, the Turbo two's Circle of Security parent program.
You can get more information at EPCCI NC dot org
(18:08):
click on services. And then Early Childhood again today the
HOPES program focusing on ages five and under. So although
you're a licensed clinical social worker, so what is your
role in the HOPES program.
Speaker 4 (18:20):
So I'm the lead clinician there at our job, So
I facilitate therapy sessions with the kiddo's zero to five
and one of their caregivers at a time, and then
I also supervise another employee, she's a licensed professional counselor
as well. So the therapy that we provide is called therapy.
Speaker 2 (18:41):
Therapy makes a lot of way in.
Speaker 4 (18:42):
Therapy, and it's two very different types of therapy. And
I think here pass found I'm mistaken. I'm the only
one that's licensed in therapy as a foundational practitioner here.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
So what is the difference between the play and play therapy?
Speaker 4 (19:01):
So with theraplay, it's an intervention that focuses on enhancing
the connection, trust and joy between the parent and the
child and also building or enhancing a positive attachment with them.
And then what we do. We have activities that we do.
I call it our treatment plan. It's about like ten
to twelve activities and then one activity I'm more than
(19:24):
sure people will be familiar with it, Keep you upy.
Speaker 3 (19:27):
With the balloon.
Speaker 4 (19:29):
And then it's myself, caregiver and a child and we're
trying to hit the balloon up in the air. Keep
We're just trying to see how long we could keep
okay in the air, because with kittles from zero to five,
you can't sit down in a chair and talk to them, right.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
Yeah, no, I tried it. I have too. It didn't work.
It doesn't work as well, so it's going to start
us and have a chat.
Speaker 4 (19:53):
So this way we're we're playing. I like to say,
we're playing with the purpose. I'm not just hitting the
balloon up in the air because it's fun. I think
it's very fun too to be hitting a balloon up
in the air. But with that where of course we're
fostering a positive, safe environment for the child and the caregiver,
and then also just communication coregulation, And with coregulation that's
(20:14):
very very important. That's where the caregiver makes the child
feel safe and comfortable because without that, my job would
be a little harder to do. Yeah, because I mainly
I used to think that I'm mainly working with the
little kiddo, but I'm mainly working with the with the
parent because I'm helping model teach and coach what we
(20:35):
should be doing and kind of rolling with the resistance
and being very attuned to their need in that moment.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
And so if I'm gathering this correctly, the difference between
therap play and play therapy. Play therapy is more like
the child can be on their own playing with their
blocks or doing whatever. But theraplay it's like a group effort.
Like you're saying, with the keep up, I've never heard
that term, but that makes sense. I've played that game before.
It's like you can tell that as a kid because
when you go to those big concerts and they throw
around that big ball, you know, like everybody is, yeah,
(21:05):
you can tell which ones are like that. So and
so with that, uh, you know, with with the keepy up.
How does that because that's something very simple that people
can do at home. So that's a great example. But
how does that foster the trust between the child and
the caregiver?
Speaker 4 (21:23):
Well, right there, the parent is meeting the child where
they're at because they're not being so serious, they're not
taking themselves too serious, and they're communicating and they're working
together again as a team to keep the balloon up
because sometimes it gets a little hectic, right and people
are diving. Yeah, I don't need to go to the
gym anymore, right, But again, that's it helps to let
(21:45):
the kids guard down a little bit, and also the
caregiver as well, because they're also having fun and they're
being attuned to the kiddo as well, and then looking
at at the balloon like where it's going. And also safety, right,
you don't want to be running into a little kiddo
because yeah, bigger than them. Yeah, well not that much
bigger sometimes, but.
Speaker 2 (22:02):
Bigger, right, Yeah, we come in all shapes and sizes.
Speaker 4 (22:05):
So we need to worry about that. But again there's
just that communication and just really being attuned and then
that's a different way for them to build that that
trust that Okay, they got my back. Like say, the
balloon gets hit on the other side of the room
and then the kiddo can't get there. The parents are like,
I got you, Yeah, you go get it and then
hit it back to you. So it's kind of like, hey,
you got.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
My back, or if the if the child can't get it,
and you know, and they start crying because they can't
get it, but it's all right, it's cool, Like we just.
Speaker 4 (22:31):
Restart, right, And that's another thing I tell them, So
it's like, hey, we're gonna try to keep it up
as long as we can. But eventually it's gonna fall down,
and it's okay, we're gonna get it back up, We're
gonna get a try again. Because sometimes kids from zero
five they can't self regulate themselves right at that age.
They need help or they also need somebody to role
model it for them. So some kiddos are already very
(22:52):
very competitive. I'm very competitive as well, so I get it. Yeah,
when it goes down and they just start they I
don't like to say that they're throwing tantrums. I like
to said they're disregulated. Yes, so they get disregulated, their
emotions are high, and then they'll start yelling. But then
at that point you start rolling with the resistance. And
that's another thing with theirplay where you're meeting the child
where they're at, not where you're at.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Yes, I would imagine that part of your role. And
this is something that I mean, I was a young mom.
I was twenty when I had my first daughter. And
so something that a lot of people don't realize is
one like you're saying, their brain literally is not fully
developed to like what twenty six twenty seven actually, but
you know, you know, especially yeah, give or take at
that age, like their frontal lobe and everything is not
fully developed, so they really physically biologically cannot control their
(23:37):
emotions and people. What happens, I guess is the parents
meet them up at that tantrum. So I'm assuming that
you would help the parents to like kind of teach
them to monitor their own emotions when it comes to
handling their kids tantrums.
Speaker 4 (23:49):
Absolutely, do you.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Have any advice for that, because that's a big one.
Speaker 4 (23:52):
You know, you tough, that's super tough. And again I
don't claim to know everything. I'm not perfect. We're gonna
mess up, we're gonna make mistakes. But I think again,
it's just reminding yourself. Like, for the most part, our parents,
they're over twenty one, I would say, Mary, yes, right.
For the most person, I'm gonna say, we're adults, right,
we're adults and these kiddles.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
And honestly, anytime you have a kid, you turn into adult,
no matter what.
Speaker 4 (24:16):
I guess, you have to write, no matter what, you
have to show up or not. But the ones that
are coming here, that's why I commend them a lot
and say like, hey, we're not gonna be perfect, but
hey you're here.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
That takes a lot of strength to ask for help.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
That's tough. That's being very vulnerable with this because I'm
a complete stranger at the beginning. Later on, now we
get we build a rapport kind of things like that,
but in the moment, just kind of do whatever you
got to do for yourself. Deep breathing, take a step back,
self reflection, and be like, that's a child. I'm the adults.
What can I do to help meet their need? And
(24:48):
it doesn't have to be anything extravagant or perfect. Like
sometimes they're like, oh, I'll play like stacking bean bags
on their hands and then it'll fall down, and then
they'll just get in and start throwing it. And I'm like, okay,
I see that you're pretty strong and you want to
throw that bean back. They see how far you could
throw it. Then they throw it. Yeah, right, do it again,
and then they do it all right, do it three
(25:09):
more times? Yeah, and then we're going to come back
and do this Okay.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
So that would be an example of meeting them, meeting
them where they're.
Speaker 4 (25:15):
At, rolling with their resistance, but also validating in that
moment that what they want to do and like kind
of that sense of control that they have, but then
providing it in a supportive and structured way. And I'm
not just letting you throw whatever, right.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Yeah, you're like directing it. And again if you're just
joining us, we have here Mary ramda's Early Childhood Services
program director and Aldo gotveya licensed clinical social worker for
the HOPES program at the Alpaco Center for Children. Now,
this HOPES program is geared again towards age five and unders.
So that's a very specific time in a child's life.
(25:51):
What is the importance of the development, you know, the
relationship between the caregiver and the parent and a child
between those ages those years.
Speaker 4 (25:59):
So it's so huge and I think, oh, man, just
with my experience, I've been a social worker for twelve years.
I've worked with little kiddos, teenagers, adults in different aspects.
But the main thing that I don't think is fair
is from zero to five our brain ninety of our
(26:19):
brain gets developed and then a lot for me, right,
and then that's the fastest our brain gets developed in
our whole human development. Wow, so there's a lot going
on there.
Speaker 2 (26:34):
The biggest percent of growth, Yes.
Speaker 4 (26:37):
Zero five, that's the fastest your brain growth and then
it right, that's a lot. So we're also learning our attachment,
whether secure attachment, avoidant, anxious, ambivalent. Those are going to
dictate how you're gonna.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Have a relationship, who you get married to with everything
right or just it just impacts everything.
Speaker 4 (26:58):
How you socialize with people, how you self regulate. You're
getting taught that and your your nervous system, right if
your fight flight or freeze, that's happening as well too.
And then the kiddos they're looking and they're not even looking,
they're feeling what's going on. They're seeing. They're seeing what's
going on with their parents or their caregivers or whoever's
(27:20):
taking care of them. Right, So that's really going to
set a foundation or kind of guide who you're gonna be. Yeah,
which is I think it's unfair, right because let me
ask you a question. When did you ever hear anybody
tell you, Oh, yeah, I'm this way. I'm that way
because of what I went through when I was like
twenty two? Are you always mainly right? You correct me
if I'm wrong again? Right? No? And yeah, no, I'm
(27:42):
like this way because of how I was brought up
when I was a little kid. Right, I saw this
when I was a kid. Oh, I get this from
my dad. I got this from my mom.
Speaker 2 (27:49):
Well, what's kind of scary about that is five and ninder,
you don't remember a lot of it. You don't remember,
you know. And yeah, and so you know, you always see,
you know, maybe not the right parenting tactics and a
lot of people because they don't know how the child
brain develops. And so I think that's why this kind
of program is so important, and that's why I'm so
so glad to hear. But you're right, like, it's it's
(28:11):
what happens when you're a kid.
Speaker 4 (28:12):
Mm hmm. Yeah. So again right now we're being we're
being proactive. And that's one reason I this job was
very appealing to me because I would work and I
love working with teenagers. But when I would work with teenagers,
I was doing a lot of damage control. Yeah right,
these not as healthy behaviors or things like that. How
can we do less of it?
Speaker 2 (28:32):
And now they're bigger and stronger. Yeah, and now they
have cars and cell phone. Oh my god. Yeah, my
daughter's ten asking for a phone. I'm like, nope, not
till you're twenty.
Speaker 5 (28:43):
Yeah, no, I never know nowadays, but I do want
to add, you know what Aldo said, is you know,
if a parent doesn't know what to do at that
moment where their child is having a tantrum or having
a moment, that's when we have other services for those parents,
like we have Parents' teachers or Incredible Years and Circle
of Security. So we always try to connect a parent
to any type of resources because you know, being a
(29:04):
parent is tough. Kids don't come with instructions. We're not dead,
but they don't. But it's like how you said, once
a parent, a child is porn. That mom or dad
becomes a parent in a second, it's not about you anymore.
It's not about you and it's never going to be
about you again, even after they turn twenty one.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Oh yeah, no I'm thirty, I'm thirty nine, and it's
still not about my mom.
Speaker 5 (29:23):
So exactly right, Like, well, my sisters we always fight
over my mom because oh yeah, so good. Yeah, So
we always try to connect parents to anything they may need.
And the good thing is like the agency has other programs,
so once the child ages out of Hopes, we could
refer them to the Hopes program, I mean, sorry to
the Face program Face and so on and so on.
(29:45):
So it's always a connecting the parents.
Speaker 2 (29:47):
The Alpaco Center for Children really is a center for
children and caregivers and parents. And again, if you don't
you know HOPES program kids five and nineer, you have
the FACE program for kids six through to seventeen six
through seventeen and then EPCCI NC dot org or you
can just google Alpassal Center for Children. All of these
resources are free. You don't have to be in a
(30:08):
crisis situation. You don't have to be in a situation
where you think it's needed for help. Again, preventative is
always the best. So if you're pregnant, if you have
a young child, just go and learn. I mean you
may find out something that you don't know that can
really help you. Epc c I NC dot org for
the whole program specifically, go to services, go to Early Childhood,
explore that whole website. Now, I'm gonna ask each of
(30:30):
you one at a time. Mary, I'll start with you first.
Is there anything else that you would like to tell
the listening audience?
Speaker 5 (30:35):
You know what I think just in general, you know
myself as being a mom to a soon to be
thirteen year old boy, I know, I'm I know, it's
it's okay, not knowing everything and getting those services. You know,
I wish I knew about all the services the agency
has to offer because it's hard. Like I said, kids
(30:56):
don't come with destruction, So don't be ashamed to you know,
reach out to and we'll try to find any services
that you might be eating. But once again, everything's for free. Yeah,
take advantage, take advantage and same thing.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Although anything else that you would like to tell the
listening audience, yes, I would say.
Speaker 4 (31:13):
I hate saying this, but it's very true. Like you,
as a parent or caregiver, give yourself some grace. I
know it's tough, it's hard. I am the way who
I am because of my family. I love my parents,
very hard working, loving, caring. They showed me how to
be a man. They showed me also my mom how
to be gentle as well, and me later on right
kind of meshing that together, and then my older brother,
(31:35):
my younger brother. That's my motivation and it's I haven't
been perfect throughout my life, but there I had the support, right,
So I think that's one main thing I want to
say is if you don't know what, if you're scared
or you're like I'm not doing anything right? What could
I do? Just be present, if anything, just be present
and let alone like your your tone of voice, your
(31:57):
facial expressions, all that, and just seen your kid and
tell them you love them or being affect whatever way
that looks like for you. That's it. That's that's huge.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
And I think a big part because I'm still learning
right to give myself grace now because I'm a mom
of two daughters nineteen and ten. Not just giving yourself
grace as a mom, but as a person and just
being okay with telling your kids I'm sorry, I did
not make the best decision. I'm sorry, like after the fact.
I remember I was telling my mom this the other day.
I'm like, I remember one time, don't. I must have
(32:27):
been in high school and I was excited about a
prom or a dance, and she all of a sudden
was like, ah, you're ahead, like kind of dummy, like
you know, pooping on it. Yeah, And I just remember
her like maybe five minutes later, seeing I'm sorry, I
didn't mean to do that. I didn't mean to you know,
rain on your parade, And I remember that sticks out,
So being okay with telling your five year old i'm sorry.
They may not understand, or telling your thirteen year old
(32:49):
I'm sorry, you know, and just being ok you messed up,
like you say, kids don't come with an instruction manual,
But then forgive yourself for that.
Speaker 4 (32:57):
I learned how powerful that is just saying that.
Speaker 2 (33:00):
Thirty nine years you know what what was maybe like
thirty years later, that's what I remember.
Speaker 4 (33:04):
I know. And then the viewers at home can't see
you your eyes little did?
Speaker 2 (33:07):
They like those core memories?
Speaker 5 (33:12):
Right, it's making those core memories and like everybody's saying,
here is like giving yourself grace, you know, it's okay,
not being okay, yes, yes too, and showing your children, hey,
you're not always going to be okay, and because that's
how life is, and that's something that I've always taught
my son. I think he saw me break down for
the first time, I want to say, last November over
(33:35):
a cat.
Speaker 2 (33:35):
That run away.
Speaker 5 (33:37):
I know, we love cats, and I just broke down
and I had to tell him, like, mommy needs a minute. Yeah,
I'm going to be okay, but this is the reason.
And he physically saw me crying, yeah, and he just
sat next to me. Yeah, So like this is what
we're trying to teach you know, parents in the community
like it's okay.
Speaker 2 (33:53):
Yeah, they want to see that you're human too. So
again I want to thank you both for being here
with me today. Mary I meet us and Alogdodea from
the Hopes Program of the l Passo Center for Children
EPCCI NC dot org. And again you can go to
Power one oh two point one Sunday ninety nine point
nine or ninety six point three k Country our Instagram
and Facebook. This information will be up. We'll have pictures
(34:14):
and everything you need. Thank you both for being here
with me again today.
Speaker 5 (34:17):
Thank you for having us.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
You've been listening to El Paso Public Forum, a weekly
public affairs presentation of iHeartRadio l Passo. If you, your
organization or event would like to be featured on an
upcoming program, please email to Epforum at iHeartMedia dot com
or call us at nine one five three five one
five four zero zero. Tune in again next week for
(34:39):
another additional of El Paso Public Forum. The preceding program
was recorded at the studios of iHeartRadio El Paso
Welcome to El Paso Public Forum, a weekly half hour
public affairs presentation of iHeartRadio El Paso for over twenty years,
featuring local news and interviews of interest to our listeners
in West Texas and southern New Mexico. All views and
opinions expressed on this program are those of the host
and guest, and not necessarily those of iHeartRadio Management and
now El Paso Public Forum.
Speaker 2 (00:21):
Welcome to the l Paso Public Forum. I'm your host,
Amber Banda, and today we have Scott Brown. He is
the executive director of Rock Up and Recover. Scott, thank
you for being here with me today.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
Thank you for having me. I'm glad to be here.
Speaker 2 (00:36):
You look very dapper in your cowboy hat. I love it.
You were just because you know we were recording the
KHY station, right.
Speaker 3 (00:40):
That's right. Well, I did grow up on a ranch,
so I do wear it a lot, but not normally
you did.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
I'm very jealous of that too, But that's another conversation
for another day. So Rock Up and Recover this is
a very new nonprofit organization. Scott, can you tell the
listening audience what is Rock Up and Recover?
Speaker 3 (00:59):
Absolutely? So, we launched on Memorial Day of this year,
twenty twenty five, so just about a month ago. Myself
and another veteran, Dan Tesky, who is the CEO of
Damascus Gaming, and my wife who knows that I have
my military drama and mental health issues, we started this
organization and what we do is number one, we help
(01:21):
veterans sign up for their benefits. We help get them
into health care, we help get their claim started, things
like that, and we put them in touch with other
veteran organizations to help them get those things pushed through.
But the bigger thing that we do is we take
them on mental health reset retreats. So we take them
to places like the mountains of California, the mountains of Colorado,
(01:45):
and up in Cloudcroft here in New Mexico. Those are
the three places we do right now. We take them
for a week, we turn off the Wi Fi and
we just have a big mental health reset. We go
on hikes, and all of this is paid for for
the airfare. We cook very good meals for them, meals
that they wouldn't get at home. We cook over campfires.
(02:08):
We do a lot of things, archery, acts, throwing, we
play games and we just sit there and get to
know each other and talk about what issues we have.
And then we also talk about nonsense and we tell
inappropriate jokes because that's what veterans do.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
Hey, yeah, I mean I you know, I come from
the biker world, a lot of veterans there, and I
love the inappropriate jokes as long as they're not geared
towards me. So if with Rock Up and Recover, when
you take them on these reset retreats, about how many
veterans do you take and are their spouses welcome as
well or is it just the veterans.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
So the spouses can go on their own retreats. We
do include spouses, but we take just the veterans and
we only take male or female. So if there are
male spouses, and there are some, they are welcome to
come with the male veterans and that group. If there
are female spouses, they are welcome to go with the
female veterans in their group. And we like to keep
(03:01):
them separate because men don't like to talk in front
of women and women don't like to talk in front
of men.
Speaker 2 (03:05):
Yeah, exactly. And for this brand new organization, it is national.
I mean, it's not just here in all passes. So
I mean, I have been a part of a few nonprofits.
I've never started one myself. But before we get into
more of the meat and potatoes of ruck Up and Recover,
I'm very curious, like, how do you how do you
do it all? Like, how do you, you know, create
this national organization?
Speaker 3 (03:26):
So there's another organization that does this, and they're a
very good organization. It's how I learned about it. I
went on one of their retreats. But their's is geared
towards they have a religious background, and a lot of
people don't want to do that, and I am religious,
and I have no problem with that, but I want
(03:48):
everyone to be able to come. I want Jewish veterans
to be able to come, Muslim veterans to be able
to come. I want LGBTQ veterans to be able to
come and not have to worry about that particular type
of judgment. So ours is open to any veteran. If
they want to talk to me or another veteran about religion,
(04:10):
they're more than welcome to. But there's no bottom line
of that. It's not going to be forced upon them.
Speaker 2 (04:15):
And you being a veteran, and you know you just
said that you went on a similar retreat more with
a religious aspect. How do you feel that these retreats
would help veterans, Like what kind of change did you
personally see after you went on that retreat.
Speaker 3 (04:31):
So number one, you get a mineral health reset. And
it's great because you have no WiFi. WiFi has turned
off for twenty three hours a day. There's no cell
signal where we go, so we're out there. We do
have Wi Fi for emergencies, but it's very it's very relaxed.
If you want to go on the hike, you can,
but you don't have to. If you want to do
(04:53):
some work on the ranches we go to or the
outfits that we go at, we do a little project.
If you want to do that, you can, but you
don't have to. So if you want to in California
hike down to the families huge cemetery that they have
on their ranch and look at their headstones, you can
do that, but you don't have to. There's very little
things that we really force you to do. The only
thing that you have to do is every night we
(05:15):
sit around the campfire and we talk thirty forty five
minutes about whatever. But most of the time mental health
comes up, I might push it towards that direction a
little bit.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
I mean, that's the whole point exact.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
And at the end of the week, we want to
leave something behind, some challenge that they're facing. Maybe it's
a problem in their marriage, maybe it's a problem with
their kids, maybe it's a mental health issue that they
don't want to talk to their spouse about. And we
want to number one, point them in the right direction
to get them help, whether it's through the VA community care, however,
we're going to do that, and we do have therapists
that can work with them or I'm sorry, and also
(05:53):
leave that behind. We write it down, nobody reads it.
They can read it out loud if they want to
the group, but they don't have to. Yeah, and we
throw it in the fire, and that's how we're gonna
leave it behind. So we come back refreshed and ready
to fight a new day.
Speaker 2 (06:08):
I love that. I always talk about when it comes
to talking about mental health. I learned the term brain dumping,
where you just write it doesn't have to be correct grammar,
it doesn't have to be correct pronunciation, whatever you want.
Just write it down the paper and it's good to burn.
Speaker 4 (06:20):
It.
Speaker 2 (06:20):
You know, in your case, you may have a specific
thing that you want them to focus on when they're writing.
That way they can burn it and leave it behind.
And I think that that's amazing. So just more about
the power of writing, and I'm really impressed that you
include that in these retreats. And so do you have
any specific retreat dates coming up, especially for the people here?
And I'll passle.
Speaker 3 (06:39):
So the first one is gonna be geared towards the
people in I'll passo, okay, because we haven't done one yet.
We are currently raising funds. It costs about between depending
on how you do it, two and three thousand dollars
to do these retreats per person per person, because it
includes the food, the lodging, and the airfare. This first
one we're not gonna have a lot of airfare because
we're gonna gear towards better here in El Paso, in
(07:02):
the Borderland area, and we're gonna go to Cloudcraft. So there,
there's gonna be very and and we're gonna bust them.
Nobody's gonna drive because we want to all go up together.
We want to meet here and start the project here,
and we're gonna bring them back and end it here.
So we're looking at some time in the fall. It's
really a little too hot right now, and we're we're
(07:24):
raising funds, so we're looking at some time in the
September October time range. But that's that's gonna be our
first one, and we're taking ol Paso veterans. They can
go to our website, which is Rock Up Recover dot
org and register there. They can sign up, they can
send me an email from there and we will put
them on the list. There is no disqualifications. You do
(07:46):
not have to be diagnosed with a mental health issue,
you do not have to be a disabled veteran. You
just have to have a d D two fourteen and
you can come. There's no age limits, there's nothing.
Speaker 2 (07:58):
That's amazing. Again, if you're just joining us. I have
Scott Brown, he's the executive director for Rock Up and Recover.
So you were talking about these mental health resets, these retreats,
and right now you're in the process of fundraising, trying
to gather enough funds anywhere from two to three thousand
per person. The first one focused here for Al Paso
(08:19):
veterans and surrounding areas. Cloud Craft sometime in the fall
September October. So what I want to talk about for
a little bit is the fundraising part of it. That's
all everything. There's two things that every nonprofit needs. It's
volunteers and it's fun. So can you tell the listening
audience how can they help? How can they help you? Fundraise?
Speaker 3 (08:39):
Absolutely on the website there is. It pops up as
soon as you log in there. It pops up and
you can donate that way. You can also send me
an email. We take in kind donations as well. You know,
maybe a bus company wants to loan us a bus,
or loan us a driver and a bus to drive
up there and then come pick us up on Friday
(09:00):
and drive us back. Things like that. It doesn't have
to be cash. Also, volunteers obviously, especially those who have
maybe a mental health background, not necessarily have gone to
school for it, but understand it. Maybe they're the spouse
of a veteran, or they're a veteran who's had some
challenges and is willing to come up and talk about
(09:21):
those challenges for a day or even stay the whole week.
So those are the types of things that we're looking for. Again,
it's two to three thousand dollars. This one that we're
gonna the inaugural one maybe a little cheaper because there's
no airfare, but normally it's two to three thousand dollars.
And it really does help. And you've seen the federal
(09:42):
government come out and say, hey, we're going to give
the VA this money to concentrate on mental health. We
don't necessarily see that money. We may in the future,
but right now we don't. It's a great thing that
the VA is doing. But depending on what study you
look at, there's between eighteen and twenty two veterans and
or active duty soldiers that commit suicide per day on average,
(10:06):
and the whole goal of the federal government and these
types of organizations is to lower that number to zero. Potentially,
it's going to take a while to get there. There's
a lot of things broken in the healthcare system. But
this is a project that we hope to help veterans
understand that there are people that still need them and
(10:29):
want them here on this planet for the rest of
their natural days.
Speaker 2 (10:34):
And I'm going to ask you on a more personal note,
I mean, when people start these kind of nonprofits or foundations,
they have a huge drive to right, obviously, So why
did you want to start this? What did you see?
What did you feel was the importance of starting this.
Speaker 3 (10:51):
I've seen veterans who have committed suicide, I've known them,
and it's not something that you want to live through.
And certainly the families of those veterans are even greatly
more affected. And we want to make sure that these
veterans and these spouses and these other family members know
(11:12):
that there's more to live for. And we also want
to get the general public to know what the signs
are to look for. There's actually a Veteran crisis line.
It's nine eight eight, just like nine to one one,
but nine eight eight. Anybody can call that number to
report a veteran and in crisis. It doesn't have to
be a veteran or the family member. If a neighbor
(11:35):
knows a veteran and knows that they're having problems, and
it doesn't even need to necessarily be mental health. It
could be maybe a potential homeless issue or an addiction issue.
They can call that number and the VA will send
someone out or make a phone call and try to
contact that veteran to get them the help that they need.
Eight nine eight eight.
Speaker 2 (11:55):
And in the meantime, while you're raising funds and as
this gets to be a bigger thing and you're taking
more people on these retreats, you also provide resources and
lists and phone numbers and context to veterans in the
meantime Rock up recover dot org. They can contact you
through there if they have any questions about that.
Speaker 3 (12:12):
Absolutely, and every week we put more information in there.
We have blog posts in there as well, and we're
going to be starting in the near future, which will
be on the website a podcast. Myself and Dan Tasky,
one of the other directors, will be starting a podcast
to just talk about all things veterans. There may be
or may not be some inappropriate jokes that are told.
Speaker 2 (12:34):
There are I mean, I think the listening audience only
knows like half of my personality, because you know, I
like the inappropriate jokes sometimes and the colorful language as
I call it. But you know, Scott, I just really
want to thank you, first of all, thank you for
your service, thank you for being vulnerable, thank you for
creating something like this because a lot of times veterans,
(12:55):
you know, I guess whatever the I mean. I am
not from a military background, I had some military family members,
but it seems to me the picture I get and
a lot of people get, is they're from the military.
They don't want to talk, especially if they have a
military background, about their feelings. You know, it's not just
they're a man. Men in general don't like to talk
about mental health, but especially when they're a veterans. So
(13:15):
I just want to say thank you for creating this,
thank you for talking about the importance of mental health
with veterans and their families. And you think about their children.
You know that what you were saying about the suicide rate,
you know, it's just scarily high, and you got to
think about the families that are left behind. So what
I would like to ask you as a final question,
is what would you like to tell all the veterans
(13:37):
that may be listener, maybe someone that can relay this
message or share the link, because this is a podcast
that will be shareable. What would you like to tell
them to just say, Hey, it's okay to ask for help,
it's okay to reach out, we want you here.
Speaker 3 (13:49):
It's one hundred percent okay to ask for help. I
am a manly, manly man, and it is.
Speaker 2 (13:54):
Easy, very manly we're posting pictures on our social It took.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Me years to understand that it's okay to talk about
these problems. And I want to use my experience to
let others know. Don't let it take you years. You
can talk to your spouse. Your spouse wants to talk
to you. I assure you. You can talk to your parents.
If you're younger and you don't have a spouse, you
can talk to the VA. The VA has made leaps
(14:21):
and bounds improvements in their mental health program. Is it perfect? No,
no program is, but they are trying their hardest. They
want to help. I want to help. Amber wants to help.
Ask for help, Ask for help, get it out there
that you want help, that you need help, and don't
be afraid to reach out and get that help.
Speaker 2 (14:42):
And if there if you feel honestly, because I mean
I I have PTSD, I wasn't in the war anything,
but I did have my war going on as a kid.
If you feel like there's no one that you can
reach out to, journaling like we talked about it, and
you're just write it down, get it out of your head.
It's not a cure all, but it does help.
Speaker 3 (14:56):
Well, you know, there's another thing on the nine eight eight.
You can also text that number. Some people don't like
to talk. You can text that number and a mental
health therapist will respond within a minute or two and
they will talk to you via text. Oh wow, you
do not have to call them. It's the most awesome program.
(15:16):
I've seeing the VA come out with it a long time. Yes,
so I know a lot of people prefer to text.
Do that instead.
Speaker 2 (15:23):
Again, call or text that veteran crisis number nine eight eight.
You do not have to be the veteran. You do
not have to be related to the veteran. You just
have to see a veteran in need nine to eight eight.
To show people you care, Rock up Recover dot org
and again you can go to power on two point
one Sunday ninety nine point nine or ninety six point three.
K Hey Country on our Instagram and Facebook, this information
(15:45):
will be there. We'll have a picture of Manly Man
Scott and if you want any questions you can also
reach us on there. Scott, thank you so much for
being here with me today.
Speaker 3 (15:52):
Thank you, I really appreciate it.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Welcome to the public Forum. I'm your host, Amber Banda,
and today we are joined by Mary Ramirez. She's the
early childhood Services program director for the HOPES program at
All Passal Center for Children. Mary, thank you for being
here with me today.
Speaker 5 (16:14):
Thank you for having me of course.
Speaker 2 (16:15):
And we also have Aldo garadea licensed clinical social worker
and karaoke extraordinary. He is also part of the Hopes
program for al Passal Center for Children. Although, thank you
for being here with me.
Speaker 4 (16:26):
Today, thank you for having us pleasure.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
You're gonna do some Whitney Houston for us later on, Right,
he's excited about that. Right, I'm excited about that too.
So we are going to be talking today specifically about
the HOPES program. Now, I've had the al Passal Center
for Children on here. You guys have multiple things, multiple
programs for the community. But this specific program, HOPES program
is aimed for children age five and under and of
(16:52):
course their caretakers, their parents. So Mary, let me have
you talk a little bit about the programs there at
at the center.
Speaker 5 (17:00):
Right. So we've been with the Apasso County for now
going ten years, eleven years. Yeah, so you know it's
been a lot about parenting support classes we do provide
parents as teachers, incredible years, circle of security, behavior health,
which is a going to talk about a little bit
more right now. And then we also provide parent cafes.
(17:23):
So everything falls under the Hopes umbrella and they all
for free. Services are for free. We don't ask for
any type of income, any documentation. As long as the
parent or parents have a child under the age.
Speaker 2 (17:36):
Of five, that's amazing. Okay, So the HOPES program is
about ten years old, but because the All Pascal Center
for Children has been around for a while.
Speaker 5 (17:43):
Over one hundred years.
Speaker 2 (17:44):
Okay, there you go. That makes more sense. So if
you do want more information on all of those programs,
and we'll touch a little bit about all of them,
you know, like like Mary was saying, we're going to
talk about behavior a little bit with al Tho, the
Behavioral Health Services, Parents' Teachers program, the Incredible Years program,
which I was telling you earlier is a really nice
way of saying, the Turbo two's Circle of Security parent program.
You can get more information at EPCCI NC dot org
(18:08):
click on services. And then Early Childhood again today the
HOPES program focusing on ages five and under. So although
you're a licensed clinical social worker, so what is your
role in the HOPES program.
Speaker 4 (18:20):
So I'm the lead clinician there at our job, So
I facilitate therapy sessions with the kiddo's zero to five
and one of their caregivers at a time, and then
I also supervise another employee, she's a licensed professional counselor
as well. So the therapy that we provide is called therapy.
Speaker 2 (18:41):
Therapy makes a lot of way in.
Speaker 4 (18:42):
Therapy, and it's two very different types of therapy. And
I think here pass found I'm mistaken. I'm the only
one that's licensed in therapy as a foundational practitioner here.
Speaker 2 (18:58):
So what is the difference between the play and play therapy?
Speaker 4 (19:01):
So with theraplay, it's an intervention that focuses on enhancing
the connection, trust and joy between the parent and the
child and also building or enhancing a positive attachment with them.
And then what we do. We have activities that we do.
I call it our treatment plan. It's about like ten
to twelve activities and then one activity I'm more than
(19:24):
sure people will be familiar with it, Keep you upy.
Speaker 3 (19:27):
With the balloon.
Speaker 4 (19:29):
And then it's myself, caregiver and a child and we're
trying to hit the balloon up in the air. Keep
We're just trying to see how long we could keep
okay in the air, because with kittles from zero to five,
you can't sit down in a chair and talk to them, right.
Speaker 2 (19:44):
Yeah, no, I tried it. I have too. It didn't work.
It doesn't work as well, so it's going to start
us and have a chat.
Speaker 4 (19:53):
So this way we're we're playing. I like to say,
we're playing with the purpose. I'm not just hitting the
balloon up in the air because it's fun. I think
it's very fun too to be hitting a balloon up
in the air. But with that where of course we're
fostering a positive, safe environment for the child and the caregiver,
and then also just communication coregulation, And with coregulation that's
(20:14):
very very important. That's where the caregiver makes the child
feel safe and comfortable because without that, my job would
be a little harder to do. Yeah, because I mainly
I used to think that I'm mainly working with the
little kiddo, but I'm mainly working with the with the
parent because I'm helping model teach and coach what we
(20:35):
should be doing and kind of rolling with the resistance
and being very attuned to their need in that moment.
Speaker 2 (20:42):
And so if I'm gathering this correctly, the difference between
therap play and play therapy. Play therapy is more like
the child can be on their own playing with their
blocks or doing whatever. But theraplay it's like a group effort.
Like you're saying, with the keep up, I've never heard
that term, but that makes sense. I've played that game before.
It's like you can tell that as a kid because
when you go to those big concerts and they throw
around that big ball, you know, like everybody is, yeah,
(21:05):
you can tell which ones are like that. So and
so with that, uh, you know, with with the keepy up.
How does that because that's something very simple that people
can do at home. So that's a great example. But
how does that foster the trust between the child and
the caregiver?
Speaker 4 (21:23):
Well, right there, the parent is meeting the child where
they're at because they're not being so serious, they're not
taking themselves too serious, and they're communicating and they're working
together again as a team to keep the balloon up
because sometimes it gets a little hectic, right and people
are diving. Yeah, I don't need to go to the
gym anymore, right, But again, that's it helps to let
(21:45):
the kids guard down a little bit, and also the
caregiver as well, because they're also having fun and they're
being attuned to the kiddo as well, and then looking
at at the balloon like where it's going. And also safety, right,
you don't want to be running into a little kiddo
because yeah, bigger than them. Yeah, well not that much
bigger sometimes, but.
Speaker 2 (22:02):
Bigger, right, Yeah, we come in all shapes and sizes.
Speaker 4 (22:05):
So we need to worry about that. But again there's
just that communication and just really being attuned and then
that's a different way for them to build that that
trust that Okay, they got my back. Like say, the
balloon gets hit on the other side of the room
and then the kiddo can't get there. The parents are like,
I got you, Yeah, you go get it and then
hit it back to you. So it's kind of like, hey,
you got.
Speaker 2 (22:25):
My back, or if the if the child can't get it,
and you know, and they start crying because they can't
get it, but it's all right, it's cool, Like we just.
Speaker 4 (22:31):
Restart, right, And that's another thing I tell them, So
it's like, hey, we're gonna try to keep it up
as long as we can. But eventually it's gonna fall down,
and it's okay, we're gonna get it back up, We're
gonna get a try again. Because sometimes kids from zero
five they can't self regulate themselves right at that age.
They need help or they also need somebody to role
model it for them. So some kiddos are already very
(22:52):
very competitive. I'm very competitive as well, so I get it. Yeah,
when it goes down and they just start they I
don't like to say that they're throwing tantrums. I like
to said they're disregulated. Yes, so they get disregulated, their
emotions are high, and then they'll start yelling. But then
at that point you start rolling with the resistance. And
that's another thing with theirplay where you're meeting the child
where they're at, not where you're at.
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Yes, I would imagine that part of your role. And
this is something that I mean, I was a young mom.
I was twenty when I had my first daughter. And
so something that a lot of people don't realize is
one like you're saying, their brain literally is not fully
developed to like what twenty six twenty seven actually, but
you know, you know, especially yeah, give or take at
that age, like their frontal lobe and everything is not
fully developed, so they really physically biologically cannot control their
(23:37):
emotions and people. What happens, I guess is the parents
meet them up at that tantrum. So I'm assuming that
you would help the parents to like kind of teach
them to monitor their own emotions when it comes to
handling their kids tantrums.
Speaker 4 (23:49):
Absolutely, do you.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
Have any advice for that, because that's a big one.
Speaker 4 (23:52):
You know, you tough, that's super tough. And again I
don't claim to know everything. I'm not perfect. We're gonna
mess up, we're gonna make mistakes. But I think again,
it's just reminding yourself. Like, for the most part, our parents,
they're over twenty one, I would say, Mary, yes, right.
For the most person, I'm gonna say, we're adults, right,
we're adults and these kiddles.
Speaker 2 (24:13):
And honestly, anytime you have a kid, you turn into adult,
no matter what.
Speaker 4 (24:16):
I guess, you have to write, no matter what, you
have to show up or not. But the ones that
are coming here, that's why I commend them a lot
and say like, hey, we're not gonna be perfect, but
hey you're here.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
That takes a lot of strength to ask for help.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
That's tough. That's being very vulnerable with this because I'm
a complete stranger at the beginning. Later on, now we
get we build a rapport kind of things like that,
but in the moment, just kind of do whatever you
got to do for yourself. Deep breathing, take a step back,
self reflection, and be like, that's a child. I'm the adults.
What can I do to help meet their need? And
(24:48):
it doesn't have to be anything extravagant or perfect. Like
sometimes they're like, oh, I'll play like stacking bean bags
on their hands and then it'll fall down, and then
they'll just get in and start throwing it. And I'm like, okay,
I see that you're pretty strong and you want to
throw that bean back. They see how far you could
throw it. Then they throw it. Yeah, right, do it again,
and then they do it all right, do it three
(25:09):
more times? Yeah, and then we're going to come back
and do this Okay.
Speaker 2 (25:12):
So that would be an example of meeting them, meeting
them where they're.
Speaker 4 (25:15):
At, rolling with their resistance, but also validating in that
moment that what they want to do and like kind
of that sense of control that they have, but then
providing it in a supportive and structured way. And I'm
not just letting you throw whatever, right.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
Yeah, you're like directing it. And again if you're just
joining us, we have here Mary ramda's Early Childhood Services
program director and Aldo gotveya licensed clinical social worker for
the HOPES program at the Alpaco Center for Children. Now,
this HOPES program is geared again towards age five and unders.
So that's a very specific time in a child's life.
(25:51):
What is the importance of the development, you know, the
relationship between the caregiver and the parent and a child
between those ages those years.
Speaker 4 (25:59):
So it's so huge and I think, oh, man, just
with my experience, I've been a social worker for twelve years.
I've worked with little kiddos, teenagers, adults in different aspects.
But the main thing that I don't think is fair
is from zero to five our brain ninety of our
(26:19):
brain gets developed and then a lot for me, right,
and then that's the fastest our brain gets developed in
our whole human development. Wow, so there's a lot going
on there.
Speaker 2 (26:34):
The biggest percent of growth, Yes.
Speaker 4 (26:37):
Zero five, that's the fastest your brain growth and then
it right, that's a lot. So we're also learning our attachment,
whether secure attachment, avoidant, anxious, ambivalent. Those are going to
dictate how you're gonna.
Speaker 2 (26:53):
Have a relationship, who you get married to with everything
right or just it just impacts everything.
Speaker 4 (26:58):
How you socialize with people, how you self regulate. You're
getting taught that and your your nervous system, right if
your fight flight or freeze, that's happening as well too.
And then the kiddos they're looking and they're not even looking,
they're feeling what's going on. They're seeing. They're seeing what's
going on with their parents or their caregivers or whoever's
(27:20):
taking care of them. Right, So that's really going to
set a foundation or kind of guide who you're gonna be. Yeah,
which is I think it's unfair, right because let me
ask you a question. When did you ever hear anybody
tell you, Oh, yeah, I'm this way. I'm that way
because of what I went through when I was like
twenty two? Are you always mainly right? You correct me
if I'm wrong again? Right? No? And yeah, no, I'm
(27:42):
like this way because of how I was brought up
when I was a little kid. Right, I saw this
when I was a kid. Oh, I get this from
my dad. I got this from my mom.
Speaker 2 (27:49):
Well, what's kind of scary about that is five and ninder,
you don't remember a lot of it. You don't remember,
you know. And yeah, and so you know, you always see,
you know, maybe not the right parenting tactics and a
lot of people because they don't know how the child
brain develops. And so I think that's why this kind
of program is so important, and that's why I'm so
so glad to hear. But you're right, like, it's it's
(28:11):
what happens when you're a kid.
Speaker 4 (28:12):
Mm hmm. Yeah. So again right now we're being we're
being proactive. And that's one reason I this job was
very appealing to me because I would work and I
love working with teenagers. But when I would work with teenagers,
I was doing a lot of damage control. Yeah right,
these not as healthy behaviors or things like that. How
can we do less of it?
Speaker 2 (28:32):
And now they're bigger and stronger. Yeah, and now they
have cars and cell phone. Oh my god. Yeah, my
daughter's ten asking for a phone. I'm like, nope, not
till you're twenty.
Speaker 5 (28:43):
Yeah, no, I never know nowadays, but I do want
to add, you know what Aldo said, is you know,
if a parent doesn't know what to do at that
moment where their child is having a tantrum or having
a moment, that's when we have other services for those parents,
like we have Parents' teachers or Incredible Years and Circle
of Security. So we always try to connect a parent
to any type of resources because you know, being a
(29:04):
parent is tough. Kids don't come with instructions. We're not dead,
but they don't. But it's like how you said, once
a parent, a child is porn. That mom or dad
becomes a parent in a second, it's not about you anymore.
It's not about you and it's never going to be
about you again, even after they turn twenty one.
Speaker 2 (29:20):
Oh yeah, no I'm thirty, I'm thirty nine, and it's
still not about my mom.
Speaker 5 (29:23):
So exactly right, Like, well, my sisters we always fight
over my mom because oh yeah, so good. Yeah, So
we always try to connect parents to anything they may need.
And the good thing is like the agency has other programs,
so once the child ages out of Hopes, we could
refer them to the Hopes program, I mean, sorry to
the Face program Face and so on and so on.
(29:45):
So it's always a connecting the parents.
Speaker 2 (29:47):
The Alpaco Center for Children really is a center for
children and caregivers and parents. And again, if you don't
you know HOPES program kids five and nineer, you have
the FACE program for kids six through to seventeen six
through seventeen and then EPCCI NC dot org or you
can just google Alpassal Center for Children. All of these
resources are free. You don't have to be in a
(30:08):
crisis situation. You don't have to be in a situation
where you think it's needed for help. Again, preventative is
always the best. So if you're pregnant, if you have
a young child, just go and learn. I mean you
may find out something that you don't know that can
really help you. Epc c I NC dot org for
the whole program specifically, go to services, go to Early Childhood,
explore that whole website. Now, I'm gonna ask each of
(30:30):
you one at a time. Mary, I'll start with you first.
Is there anything else that you would like to tell
the listening audience?
Speaker 5 (30:35):
You know what I think just in general, you know
myself as being a mom to a soon to be
thirteen year old boy, I know, I'm I know, it's
it's okay, not knowing everything and getting those services. You know,
I wish I knew about all the services the agency
has to offer because it's hard. Like I said, kids
(30:56):
don't come with destruction, So don't be ashamed to you know,
reach out to and we'll try to find any services
that you might be eating. But once again, everything's for free. Yeah,
take advantage, take advantage and same thing.
Speaker 2 (31:08):
Although anything else that you would like to tell the
listening audience, yes, I would say.
Speaker 4 (31:13):
I hate saying this, but it's very true. Like you,
as a parent or caregiver, give yourself some grace. I
know it's tough, it's hard. I am the way who
I am because of my family. I love my parents,
very hard working, loving, caring. They showed me how to
be a man. They showed me also my mom how
to be gentle as well, and me later on right
kind of meshing that together, and then my older brother,
(31:35):
my younger brother. That's my motivation and it's I haven't
been perfect throughout my life, but there I had the support, right,
So I think that's one main thing I want to
say is if you don't know what, if you're scared
or you're like I'm not doing anything right? What could
I do? Just be present, if anything, just be present
and let alone like your your tone of voice, your
(31:57):
facial expressions, all that, and just seen your kid and
tell them you love them or being affect whatever way
that looks like for you. That's it. That's that's huge.
Speaker 2 (32:07):
And I think a big part because I'm still learning
right to give myself grace now because I'm a mom
of two daughters nineteen and ten. Not just giving yourself
grace as a mom, but as a person and just
being okay with telling your kids I'm sorry, I did
not make the best decision. I'm sorry, like after the fact.
I remember I was telling my mom this the other day.
I'm like, I remember one time, don't. I must have
(32:27):
been in high school and I was excited about a
prom or a dance, and she all of a sudden
was like, ah, you're ahead, like kind of dummy, like
you know, pooping on it. Yeah, And I just remember
her like maybe five minutes later, seeing I'm sorry, I
didn't mean to do that. I didn't mean to you know,
rain on your parade, And I remember that sticks out,
So being okay with telling your five year old i'm sorry.
They may not understand, or telling your thirteen year old
(32:49):
I'm sorry, you know, and just being ok you messed up,
like you say, kids don't come with an instruction manual,
But then forgive yourself for that.
Speaker 4 (32:57):
I learned how powerful that is just saying that.
Speaker 2 (33:00):
Thirty nine years you know what what was maybe like
thirty years later, that's what I remember.
Speaker 4 (33:04):
I know. And then the viewers at home can't see
you your eyes little did?
Speaker 2 (33:07):
They like those core memories?
Speaker 5 (33:12):
Right, it's making those core memories and like everybody's saying,
here is like giving yourself grace, you know, it's okay,
not being okay, yes, yes too, and showing your children, hey,
you're not always going to be okay, and because that's
how life is, and that's something that I've always taught
my son. I think he saw me break down for
the first time, I want to say, last November over
(33:35):
a cat.
Speaker 2 (33:35):
That run away.
Speaker 5 (33:37):
I know, we love cats, and I just broke down
and I had to tell him, like, mommy needs a minute. Yeah,
I'm going to be okay, but this is the reason.
And he physically saw me crying, yeah, and he just
sat next to me. Yeah, So like this is what
we're trying to teach you know, parents in the community
like it's okay.
Speaker 2 (33:53):
Yeah, they want to see that you're human too. So
again I want to thank you both for being here
with me today. Mary I meet us and Alogdodea from
the Hopes Program of the l Passo Center for Children
EPCCI NC dot org. And again you can go to
Power one oh two point one Sunday ninety nine point
nine or ninety six point three k Country our Instagram
and Facebook. This information will be up. We'll have pictures
(34:14):
and everything you need. Thank you both for being here
with me again today.
Speaker 5 (34:17):
Thank you for having us.
Speaker 1 (34:18):
You've been listening to El Paso Public Forum, a weekly
public affairs presentation of iHeartRadio l Passo. If you, your
organization or event would like to be featured on an
upcoming program, please email to Epforum at iHeartMedia dot com
or call us at nine one five three five one
five four zero zero. Tune in again next week for
(34:39):
another additional of El Paso Public Forum. The preceding program
was recorded at the studios of iHeartRadio El Paso
Popular Podcasts
New Heights with Jason & Travis Kelce
Football’s funniest family duo — Jason Kelce of the Philadelphia Eagles and Travis Kelce of the Kansas City Chiefs — team up to provide next-level access to life in the league as it unfolds. The two brothers and Super Bowl champions drop weekly insights about the weekly slate of games and share their INSIDE perspectives on trending NFL news and sports headlines. They also endlessly rag on each other as brothers do, chat the latest in pop culture and welcome some very popular and well-known friends to chat with them. Check out new episodes every Wednesday. Follow New Heights on the Wondery App, YouTube or wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen to new episodes early and ad-free, and get exclusive content on Wondery+. Join Wondery+ in the Wondery App, Apple Podcasts or Spotify. And join our new membership for a unique fan experience by going to the New Heights YouTube channel now!
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, And Charlamagne Tha God!
Fudd Around And Find Out
UConn basketball star Azzi Fudd brings her championship swag to iHeart Women’s Sports with Fudd Around and Find Out, a weekly podcast that takes fans along for the ride as Azzi spends her final year of college trying to reclaim the National Championship and prepare to be a first round WNBA draft pick. Ever wonder what it’s like to be a world-class athlete in the public spotlight while still managing schoolwork, friendships and family time? It’s time to Fudd Around and Find Out!