May 21, 2025 • 51 mins
In this episode of Emerge and Empower Podcast TV, we welcome Courtney Cote, a certified conscious parenting coach and founder of I Love Me Unconditionally. She shares how generational trauma, emotional overwhelm, and limiting beliefs once kept her bound, until she made the courageous choice to let go.
Courtney opens up about her own healing journey and the moment she chose to step into a life of wholeness. Though she uses the language of energy and higher power, we recognize this divine alignment as the hand of God bringing healing, awakening, and restoration. Through her story, we explore how patterns passed down through families can be broken when women stand up, speak out, and say, "No more."
Today, Courtney helps other women release shame, reconnect with their truth, and reclaim their joy. This conversation is a sacred reminder that true healing begins when we surrender the weight we've been carrying, and dare to believe we are worthy of love.
We’ve Closed the Interview, But the Conversation Continues…
Courtney Cote shared openly about energy, higher power, and the emotional layers women carry. While her language reflected her journey, I know, for me, that power is God. The true Healer. The One who breaks chains that have bound generations.
Today, I’m still thinking about the weight we inherit: trauma that isn’t ours, shame that never belonged to us, and silence passed down like a legacy. But I believe healing is available. Cycles can be broken. Wholeness is possible.
It’s not always easy to talk about generational trauma, but these conversations matter. We don’t have to carry what was never meant for us. In God, there’s freedom. And in telling the truth, there’s power.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/emerge-empower-podcast-tv--6068978/support.
🎙 Emerge & Empower Podcast TV – Hosted by Dr. Linda Joseph
📺 Watch on YouTube: youtube.com/@EmergeandEmpowerTV
🌐 Website: www.emergeandempowertv.com
📘 Facebook: facebook.com/dr.lindajoseph
💼 LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drlindajoseph
📧 Guest inquiries & speaking requests: shemergenceinfo@gmail.com
⚠️Disclaimer: Viewer and listener discretion is advised. Content may include sensitive topics. Guest views are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Dr. Linda Joseph, Shemergence, or Emerge & Empower Media.
Courtney opens up about her own healing journey and the moment she chose to step into a life of wholeness. Though she uses the language of energy and higher power, we recognize this divine alignment as the hand of God bringing healing, awakening, and restoration. Through her story, we explore how patterns passed down through families can be broken when women stand up, speak out, and say, "No more."
Today, Courtney helps other women release shame, reconnect with their truth, and reclaim their joy. This conversation is a sacred reminder that true healing begins when we surrender the weight we've been carrying, and dare to believe we are worthy of love.
We’ve Closed the Interview, But the Conversation Continues…
Courtney Cote shared openly about energy, higher power, and the emotional layers women carry. While her language reflected her journey, I know, for me, that power is God. The true Healer. The One who breaks chains that have bound generations.
Today, I’m still thinking about the weight we inherit: trauma that isn’t ours, shame that never belonged to us, and silence passed down like a legacy. But I believe healing is available. Cycles can be broken. Wholeness is possible.
It’s not always easy to talk about generational trauma, but these conversations matter. We don’t have to carry what was never meant for us. In God, there’s freedom. And in telling the truth, there’s power.
Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/emerge-empower-podcast-tv--6068978/support.
🎙 Emerge & Empower Podcast TV – Hosted by Dr. Linda Joseph
📺 Watch on YouTube: youtube.com/@EmergeandEmpowerTV
🌐 Website: www.emergeandempowertv.com
📘 Facebook: facebook.com/dr.lindajoseph
💼 LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/drlindajoseph
📧 Guest inquiries & speaking requests: shemergenceinfo@gmail.com
⚠️Disclaimer: Viewer and listener discretion is advised. Content may include sensitive topics. Guest views are their own and do not necessarily reflect those of Dr. Linda Joseph, Shemergence, or Emerge & Empower Media.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:05):
Welcome to Emerge and Empower podcast TV, a platform where
resilience meets transformation. Here we amplify voices that have faced trials, trauma,
and adversity, stories that inspire hope, healing and empowerment. Every
episode brings raw, unfiltered conversations with individuals who have risen
(00:26):
from hardship, embracing faith, strength and purpose. Join us as
we break the silence, uplift one another and emerge stronger together.
New episodes air Wednesdays at six pm English and Saturdays
at six pm, with select Saturdays in Creole for our
Haitian audience.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Hello everyone, welcome to Emerge and Empower with your host,
Doctor Lynn Jay and it's indeed a pleasure to have
you on the set on today. We journey each week
as we have individual come on to share their past
traumas and experiences. Today is no different as we have
our guests that will be coming on that will be
(01:12):
sharing her story. Go ahead, grab your seat, get in
your front row seat, Let your friends know that we
are connected on Emerging and Power today as we journey
through yet another story of resilience and transformation. Courtney Code
(01:34):
is a certified conscious parenting and life coach, a dedicated
Yogi and initiated Alchemists on a powerful mission to help
women break free from what's holding them back and step
fully into their highest potential. As a visionary author of
Amazon bestseller and founder of I Love Me Unconditionally, Courtney
(02:00):
blends cutting edge science, soulful wisdom, and transformative coaching to
guide women through deep healing and self love and radical empowerment.
With her unique blend of conscious parenting, expertise, mindful movement,
and Alchemists transformation, Courtney creates safe, sacred spaces where overwhelm
(02:24):
and stub women can release guilt, shame, and limiting beliefs
and emerge with clarity, confidence, and unstoppable joy. Her approach
honors a full human experience, helping women rediscover their inner
light and live a life overflowing with love, abundance, and connection.
(02:46):
Whether through one on one coaching, powerful online courses, or
immersive retreats, Courtney is committed to awakening the divine feminine
within every woman she serves. Her life's will is vibrant
call to embody unconditional self love and create ripple effects
of healing across families and communities. Let us welcome Courtney
(03:12):
on the set on today. Welcome Courtney to emerge and
empower with our audience. Let strat us one more time.
Hey everyone, let's welcome Courtney. Courtney, go ahead and introduce
yourself to our audience on today.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
Thank you, Doctor Lynn. This is Courtney Cody. So nice
to see you. I appreciate your kind words and your
time letting me share my story and journey with you.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Yes, introduce yourself to our audience if you wish to
share a little bit more before we get right into
your story.
Speaker 3 (03:48):
Sure, thank you. Yes. I am Courtney Cody, the founder
and CEO of I Love Me Unconditionally dot com. I
am so excited to be part of a massive movement
of absolute self love, self worth and I Love Me
Unconditionally was very intentional. It's very long, but nobody says that,
(04:13):
and so there's again a lot of intention in there.
So very excited to be here.
Speaker 4 (04:19):
Thank you so much and everyone.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Once again, like I said before, this is yet another
empowerment and healing moment for each and every one of
you as you connect around the world locally and internationally.
Speaker 4 (04:34):
Courtney, We're going to dive right into your story.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Take us to the beginning of who Courtney is, and
what was that trauma that you experience.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Yeah, I like to say, you know, I don't think
there's a lot of big teas, but I have a
lot of little teas. So big trauma versus little traumas.
My first I would say, really big trauma was I
just witnessed family member very altered and not really present,
(05:10):
and I just was very unsafe. I felt, you know,
oh my gosh, I can't trust you know, the people
that are in my life, my caretakers, And that was
that was an interesting, you know, impactful moment for me
to put on all of my armor, if you will.
And so secondly, I think another big tea little tea
(05:31):
was my father was impatient suicidal for thirty one days
when I was eight years old, and so off and
on suicidal ideation my entire life. And again that's what
led us to my company name I Love Me Unconditionally
and the website that it is today.
Speaker 4 (05:51):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
Wow, So can you take us to that experience as
a five year old little girl and what was going
through your mind?
Speaker 4 (06:01):
What was your understanding?
Speaker 3 (06:06):
Yeah, I had a playdate, you know, we we played
a little bit too late, probably four or five years
old again, and we're like, we're are our moms. You know,
it's midnight, like we should be in bed by now,
and head downstairs and you know they're kind of passed
out and sleeping and we're like, hey, you know, got
to go to bed. And you know that's kind of
(06:29):
at the time or my whole body, I think new
before really truly witnessing what had happened, the energy was
already there. So I had, you know, pretty visceral reaction
of just probably utterly shutting down, going into fight or flight.
And yeah, I think in that time, in that moment,
(06:52):
I just said to myself, I'm going to take care
of me. I can't trust anyone else, and I'm going
to put on my you know, my big, big girl
boots and we're going to life up.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Wow, even today, when we think about it, even though
children are more advanced and understanding at five years old,
or any child basically in adolescent stages, should not have
to experience any such The job of the parent, of course,
is to take care.
Speaker 4 (07:25):
And nurture the child. But here you are five years
old to think this way.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Yeah, and so the journey continues from five You said
so take us through.
Speaker 3 (07:41):
Yeah, fascinating, right. So then I mean, if we want
to just quickly fast forward to my marriage, my former marriage,
that was an interesting event also kind of a very
similar situation before I had done all the trauma work
and before I was really awakened and conscious to a
chain analysis and where it all comes from. So very
(08:03):
similar situation. You know, that individual comes let's say, back
late at night and a little bit altered or a
lot altered. And I was pregnant seven months seven months
pregnant with my first and that was pretty again impactful
(08:24):
in terms of my body just kind of shutting down
and remembering, like what where I was at that maybe
time at at five years old, right, but at the
time of that happening with the husband at the time,
it wasn't it was there's no affiliation or correlation. I
just said to myself, Wow, this is the father of
(08:45):
my children, Like how could this be? And again I'm scared,
can't trust this man? This is not okay. Now, the like,
what am I going to do?
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Right?
Speaker 3 (08:58):
My children are really are they really grow up in
this type of an environment. And so I went into,
of course masculine mode during the marriage, my feminine and
beautiful flowing femininity was not there because I was a
daughter of a marine and I learned how to protect
myself at a very young age, so I already learned
that behavior from trauma and conditions. And then in the
(09:21):
marriage when it happened again, my body just was like whoa,
And so I shut down and I went into fight
or flight and did everything myself. And you can imagine
that that dynamic did not really work. And you know,
you need polarity. You need both masculine and femininity for
(09:42):
both for both, yeah, like not just male female, but
I need to be masculine and feminine, and so he
also needs to be masculine and feminine. And we need
that polarity and young And so when that dynamic wasn't there,
then yeah, there was some challenges. So but I did
some journeying and found where it all came from, and
(10:04):
then I was beautifully enlightened. And uh, you know, COVID hit.
My dad ended up coming to live with us. He
passed away unfortunately suddenly due to pancreatic cancer. So that
was really unfortunate.
Speaker 4 (10:17):
I'm sorry for us, thank you.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
Yeah, but it was it was a beautiful learning opportunity
during that time, so that there was some silver lining
in there of my father living with us during COVID
for some time.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
So okay, so you speak about releasing the guilt and shame,
can you take us back to a time where those
emotions were shaping your life the most?
Speaker 3 (10:42):
Yeah, jeez, guilt and shame is something again. I think
we're conditioned with. I think that when we live in
an unconditional love world, we forgive ourselves, right, we have
grace for ourselves. We make mistakes, we're not perfect, and
so then we can give that grace and space to others.
But when we're conditioned, or a daughter of a marine
(11:05):
with tough love, or grew up in an environment of you know,
you need to achieve to earn my love, right, we
just inherit that. And oh, by the way, that probably
came down also from thirteen generations before me, so it's
already more or less in my DNA. I think the
(11:26):
biggest guilt and shame that I have experienced has been
before I was awakened and enlightened, was just doing something
for myself as a mom, like not being the martyr
and putting everyone else first. Right, So I felt so
guilty taking a bath. I felt so guilty going and
(11:48):
doing something for me, going to yoga, going for a walk.
I mean that was that's that's that When I think
back in hindsight, that was just I mean, we need
to us first, because otherwise we're not good for ourselves, nobody,
We're not good for anybody else. Right, we have to
put on our own oxygen mask first before we give
(12:08):
it to anybody else. But the guilt and the game
that I felt through that it was I don't know
if someone gave me permission, like, hey, Court, you really
got to take care of you first before you, you know,
take care of everybody else. Otherwise you're not going to
give everyone the best version of you, and you're doing
everybody disservice because you are so beautifully like loving and soft.
(12:30):
But when I don't take care of me first, I'm
like a bowl in a china shop. Right, So it's
very needed. I give every woman and every man, every
single human being on this planet permission to go do
you first, right, Go do you boo? Go do you first,
and then let's beautifully be there for everybody else. But
(12:52):
that's not being selfish, that's actually being responsible as like
true loving, divine human beings.
Speaker 4 (13:00):
People need to realize this.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
You must be healed in order to want to do
things for yourself. Many times it's mass and it's hidden
behind taking care of a loved one, taking care of
a child, family, and before you know it, you really
don't even know who you are, and so you've lost
touch of that, or you've had childhood traumas that you
(13:23):
didn't deal with and all of a sudden it's bam
in your face and you're like, wait a minute, who
is this person?
Speaker 4 (13:29):
All right, So in order to.
Speaker 2 (13:32):
Do you right, you have to deal with the things
about you. You have to look at yourself in the
mirror and deal with all those areas in order to
enjoy yourself. Because I'll just say the truth, and I
say this all the time. If you saw you in
the room, what you want to be your friend?
Speaker 4 (13:52):
You see? And so it starts with healing.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
And I love the fact that yourself conscious. And yes,
as a mom, you feel guilty because you want to
do something. You feel guilty because I just want to
eat it. Like can I just enjoy this by myself
without feeling guilty, or can I just go to the
movies and don't.
Speaker 4 (14:13):
Have to bring anybody with me.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
Can I just have a bubble bath without somebody walking in,
you know, because you need to have that beetime as
mother's you know, you have no privacy.
Speaker 4 (14:25):
People are in your backroom.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
When you're in the backroom, everything you're doing, someone is
always there, especially as the kids old. My kids are
older and they still tap top mom. Can I come in?
Speaker 1 (14:36):
No?
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Yeah, no, it's a boundary. And then yeah, I didn't
know that was a boundary. Yes, yes, absolutely, great completely.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
So what did letting go look like for you in
real time? Was it a moment or a process or both?
Speaker 3 (14:57):
Yeah, that's a great question. So I feel like there's
so many different kind of snowball effect. So I can
remember one letting go time where I just surrendered and
I said, I don't know what I can do for
my father. At this point in time, I was committed
to moving out to San Diego, California for a new
job from New Hampshire, north of Boston. He had just
(15:20):
gone inpatient again in Brockton Hospital, and I just was
like helpless. But I had to just let go and
surrender and do me. And I was so proud, but
I also talk about guilt and shame, like should I
be staying with my father and taking care of him
or should I be going out and doing my own life?
(15:41):
You know. So that was a big one. But I surrendered,
I let go of an accepted the process and I
was like put faith over fear and moved out to
San Diego and he got better. And that was a
tough one. You know, that was definitely a tough one.
But I think it's just trusting, letting go and letting
go odd having that half tad confidence And yeah, that
(16:05):
was one of them. There was another one I can
recall when I went on a yoga retreat in Costa
Rica and I remember them talking about surfing. We were surfing,
and you can either you know when you get when
you get knocked off the board and you you know
(16:26):
you're underwater, and you can either.
Speaker 4 (16:28):
Like one moment of getting some feedback from your bike.
Speaker 5 (16:34):
M how about now.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
Better?
Speaker 4 (16:41):
Yeah? Better?
Speaker 3 (16:44):
So in Costa Rica.
Speaker 4 (16:47):
Yeah, it's still doing it. It's like a crackling sound.
Speaker 3 (16:50):
Yeah. I can hear that too. I think I was
hearing that on your un before as well. Let me
see try to again. M hmmm, I'm hearing it before
I even start.
Speaker 4 (17:06):
Talking, right, it's mine?
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Yeah, yeah, uh huh.
Speaker 3 (17:23):
I don't know, I hear it. Why is it doing
that now? I wonder we were so good and clean before.
Speaker 5 (17:29):
I know.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
Oh no, I hear it, though I did. I did
them mute mike and then that's it. But maybe maybe
it'll just go away. We've had crazy tornadoes in Kentucky.
Maybe that's why.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Oh okay, Well, I don't know how it's gonna sound,
because sometimes you have.
Speaker 4 (17:51):
Certain noise and background noise and then it goes away.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 4 (17:59):
All right, so you moved away. You were talking about moving.
Speaker 6 (18:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (18:06):
I wasn't doing this before, Ham, but now all of
a sudden it started.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
I see, let me mute myself and you talk and
see if that's what that is.
Speaker 3 (18:31):
Yeah, I don't hear it at all. It's like crystal
clear now, so I let's see.
Speaker 4 (18:38):
So I'll just start.
Speaker 5 (18:41):
Mhm.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
Sorry, I repeat that.
Speaker 4 (18:47):
You said that you had moved away.
Speaker 3 (18:52):
Correct. That was the first time that I went like
I actually experienced letting go and it were out. I mean,
I surrendered, I trusted the process. That was faith over fear,
and that was a big one with my father just
kind of like from a situational moment, and then I
(19:13):
was and then and then and then secondly, I can
recall a really cool where I felt the letting go
and I felt like I experienced the letting go firsthand.
And someone had said when we were in Costa Rica
for Yoga's for retreat and we were surfing. So when
you're you know, thrown off the board and you tumble
(19:35):
and you're underwater and you're going like literally some people
resist and they try to come up to the surface
and they're resisting the water. They're not going with the flow. Literally,
they said, just let go go with the flow, go
with the water, right cover your head so your board
doesn't hit your head, but you're just going with the flow.
(19:55):
And there was something so magical about going with the
water and the current and where it was going underwater
and just literally letting go of control. And then when
it's over and that wave crashes and then it just
beautifully softens, that's when you tap there. So you're just
(20:19):
going with the flow and you're just letting go in
in it, like actually in it. So that's a really
cool process kind of twofold. Yeah, there was like one
that I almost powerfully empowered to let go. But then
there was another where I experienced truly letting go in
the embodiment, the embodiment and the feeling of what that
(20:42):
actually felt like, which was pretty cool.
Speaker 4 (20:46):
That's really wonderful.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
So we're going to go through your healing journey on
how you said you created I love me unconditionally. And
what is that message, that urgency that make you feel like,
you know, I have to love me unconditionally?
Speaker 4 (21:04):
What was that for you?
Speaker 3 (21:09):
So during COVID, my father and I, like I said,
we had some beautiful conversations and there was a silver
lining with his condition, you know, all the suicidal ideation,
and I was there for him. We had long conversations.
We had the time. It was, you know, COVID, and
we were all hunkered in and we didn't have anywhere
(21:31):
to go. So it was honestly, truly such a beautiful opportunity.
So with that we had like peeled back the onion
of my father's like the root cause and long story short,
we realized that, and I realized indirectly he taught me
(21:53):
that he never had true love, like unconditional love or
forgiveness for himself like he would have uncondonal love for
me because I'm his daughter. But he never truly had
unconditional love or forgiveness for himself because.
Speaker 5 (22:07):
They were.
Speaker 3 (22:11):
And he had so much guilt and shame. And I
was like, Dad, he would, you know, work for Easter
Seals and special needs and like you wouldn't hurt a fly.
And he was so sweet to all the kids and
the you know, strangers in the grocery line. I mean,
this man was so beautiful, a divine soul. And if
someone truly loved themselves uncontually and forgave themselves, there's no
(22:33):
way they would ever hurt them consider hurting themselves. And
so because his parents military, they never said I love
you or I'm proud of you. He learned external validation.
He learned more or less ego and getting it from
other people and other sources. So when you stop, and
when that just abruptly, acutely or chronically just stops and
(22:57):
you stop getting an external validation from people, that's a
legit depression. He didn't have, he didn't have his own
values or didn't have as an identity of living an
unconditional love and forgiveness. And so that to me is
the million dollar ticket in the yeast of the bread
of happiness of life.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
Yes, yes, indeed, indeed, I'm glad you said that, because
there's a lot of people if you try to explain
what you deal with at home versus when they're out
in public, the love they're so loving there is, but
then they don't have that same love for themselves.
Speaker 4 (23:35):
And the key here is that validation.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
What I realized with COVID is people needed to have,
you know, that community people to interact with. When that
was no longer there, people now had to think more
about themselves. They have more time to see themselves, and
a lot of people got really really depressed.
Speaker 4 (23:56):
A lot of people actually, even.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
Though we wouldn't like it or not, but we had
a lot of suicides that happened during that time because
people no longer had you know, that love one or
that community or that place to go to feel like
they belong all right, and.
Speaker 4 (24:15):
They caused a lot of depression loneliness.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
You could be in a relationship and you're and you're lonely,
let alone, you're in isolation from the norm, like walking
to the park and going to different places and you
stuck in one place, and that indeed is a journey
in itself.
Speaker 4 (24:32):
So for him it was the self love and all
of that.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
But did he have PTSD from being in the army
as well that also was a result of it.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
I would assume yeah, I would presume he had a
little maybe chronic PTSD, like call PTSD from childhood. But
then you go in boot camp and your marine and
you're hard tough love right, like there was no front lines.
But I feel like, you know, the trauma of anything
(25:06):
like that is something. So as much as it's not
like storming the beach of Normandy, it's still it's it's
relevant to fight. But I feel that again, from childhood,
maybe even in the womb, there was beautiful, unfortunate, divine
karma journeying of generational trauma that was passed through.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
It does back absolutely so yep, it does indeed. And
so as a conscious parenting coach and alchemist, let's talk
about that.
Speaker 4 (25:42):
How do you help women reconnect their voice?
Speaker 3 (25:46):
Oh my gosh, there's so many ways. But I think gratitude,
like first and foremost, is so crucial. Gratitude is it's
healing in itself. So we can make a gratitude list,
but we could also feel the gratitude. Yeah, we could
put our hand over our heart and we could just
think about all the things that I'm so grateful right
(26:09):
now in the embodiment of that. And when we actually
get into that beautiful heart space right and that HeartWare,
it's like a heart it's like a not a hardware upgrade,
it's a HeartWare upgrade. Yeah, there's something magical about this
space where it brings us from our head. Logical, you know,
all cool like you, but like down here, you know,
(26:32):
when they say, hey, like what does your heart say
or what is your what are you feeling? It's like
I don't know until I did know, but it was gratitude.
And I actually finally felt the gratitude. And so when
we can come from this space right here, I feel
like unlocks so much, right it unlocks so much. So
(26:53):
we could talk about tactics, we could talk about strategy,
but like that right there, the divine higher power, light,
whatever you want to call it, this beautiful gratitude right here,
we are born for more. Like I'm not gonna stay
stuck because I'm doing a disservice to everybody around me
if I.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
Say stuck for me, for me that gratitude and that
higher power is God, because I realized I had no
one else. So God is that divine, you know, the creator,
the designer of all things, and so therefore he always
wants us to have that oneness, you know, even when
you go to the Bible and you read scripture and text,
(27:32):
but always talks about us renew in our minds, renew
in our hearts, and these are things that we should
use practically in our every day but unfortunately we don't,
you understand, and then we just veer away so far
away that you know, we just become all disconnected. So
a woman that has come to you, that has been
(27:54):
dealing with post traumas and different things like that, before
she can be grateful, I'm sure you had to peel
certain layers in order for her to be grateful. So
what it would be like for you for meeting someone
who never saw that they had any worth in their life,
(28:14):
you know, didn't say any value to themselves?
Speaker 4 (28:17):
And how was how was that journey? How do you
tackle that?
Speaker 3 (28:23):
Yeah, that's a great question. I had to find that
with my father, and I could have given my dad
a Brazilian solutions and none of them were that were
anything didn't mean anything. The solution ended up being validation.
(28:44):
So we first start out with beautiful empathy. Wow, I
can't imagine how that feels for you. That must be
really dark and shitty. Dad, Let me hold your hand
when you.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
Just go way through this with your father walking, you're
walking him through his own personal journey.
Speaker 3 (29:07):
Wow, let me just sit here and hold your hand.
Let me just sit in the shit with you, like
excuse my French. Right, But with that pain that someone
feels heard and they feel oh my gosh, they get
it right. They can understand that too, unlocks the next step.
(29:30):
So instead of let's just go and like, what do
you want, let's go get it, it's wait, no, let's
validate this because that's not that's not okay. I don't approve, right.
We can forgive, but we don't have to approve of it.
We can forgive as we don't have to choose to
suffer any longer. We can choose to liberate and be free.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
That's the key there. Suffering choose not to suffer.
Speaker 3 (29:56):
Correct. But someone needs permission, right, they need to see
that this is not your future. Even though you got
this cards, this deck, this hand and a card deck
and we're playing a game. You can cast those seven
cards in and you can take seven more.
Speaker 4 (30:12):
Right, we have.
Speaker 3 (30:14):
Choices in this life. It's a beautiful, funny, human bound
experience with the ether up there and spirits and energy.
I mean, I agree, law of oneness is absolutely magical.
So the first and foremost is validation. You validate, validate, validate,
you know, you just you sit there and you hold
(30:35):
the space and the container. So they're finally heard, they're
finally seen, right, and they're validated, and someone understands and
someone gets it. And even if we don't understand all
of it, it's the empathy piece. And when someone feels
seen and heard, right, that's the next piece of the puzzle.
Because my father would always come out of it when
(30:55):
he felt like he was finally seen and heard and
he just wanted someone to feel his pain. I mean,
that was it, unfortunately for my father, you know. And
it was connection. That was his way of connecting. And
some people some people's connections. People, all we want is
deep love and connection, right, that's what we want, right,
like literally, deep love and connection right here. That's it.
(31:16):
Love is all. Love is it? Love is it? And
some people have an interesting way and behavior of going
after that negative or positive. So when we can at
least unlock that, then that's when we can move forward.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
Indeed, indeed, and as we are closing and letting you go,
because we will continue here, what would you say to
the women listening who feels stuck in guilt afraid?
Speaker 4 (31:44):
What would you say to that woman?
Speaker 3 (31:48):
Absolutely, I would say, first know that it is not you,
per se, it is potential energy that was passed down
to us through generations, right. And so when we can
know that that's not truly ours to carry, and we
(32:11):
have a choice of giving that sahi t back right
or transmuting it into another fifth dimension, another form of light,
then we can move on. It's literally getting rid of
the baggage that was not ours to ever carry in
the first place. And there's so many ways that we
can go back. And I to me personally and I
(32:33):
think scientifically, we are cracking a code of how it
all started in the womb, whether it be abandonment, whether
it be sadness, trauma, anxiety, that all came from the
womb when we were being magnificently, miraculously being built.
Speaker 2 (32:52):
Right, this world definitely a lot of things transferred through
the bloodline and it goes hours. We can go just
like the Bible says certain curses that curse.
Speaker 4 (33:03):
All the way into the fourth or sixth generation. So
things do linger.
Speaker 2 (33:07):
Whatever someone did not take care of it continues into
the child and so we Courtney has to leave, so
she can't continue on air, but will continue as we
talk about these generational pains and hurts that we that
are transferred. Okay, these are transferred spiritually transferred through the bloodline.
(33:29):
Just like you get sickness at a hereditary that transferred
to the bloodline, we also have spiritual things that are
transferred through the bloodline, and we need to be the
ones to say, you know what, it stops here.
Speaker 4 (33:41):
It will not continue with me.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
This ends now, so it does not continue into the
next generation.
Speaker 4 (33:48):
We see the.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Symbol of Bruce Lee, what he went through, his son
went through. It was a cycle that was never dealt
with starting from the beginning, and it trickled down that
they dealt with that in a spiritual level. So I
really want to thank you Courtney for being here on
Emerging Empower today and we will have her information in
the bio as to how you can connect with Courtney
(34:10):
and you can reach out to her if you find
a relatable and her story is relatable, so that way
you will continue that connection with Courtney on today. Courtney,
thank you for being on the set and thanks for
having you here. Until next time.
Speaker 3 (34:26):
Thank you. I look forward to.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
Yes, thank you and bye bye.
Speaker 7 (34:43):
That I have understanding surroundings.
Speaker 4 (34:53):
That's when I realized.
Speaker 6 (34:57):
You have till to realize what is in front of
the hiss and more treated when really like that children,
I'm Sam, but I thank God more football than the journey.
Speaker 5 (35:10):
If you have a grand fo one, you have the one.
Speaker 7 (35:14):
It makes sense because it's a no. When it's a sequence,
there will be read there after.
Speaker 5 (35:20):
I was trying to surprise it up when the second,
but it didn't make sense to all. The ship basically
talks about one. I there about what I still went
arrival was not a single rella story. It was not
a first trumping story. It was a sycle that kept
(35:40):
going and I had the weak up heart. So I
live to tell the story.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Because I couldn't like the women that at the side of.
Speaker 5 (35:46):
The same people that are out there for you tal whatever.
You don't know their story. No little girl got up
and I just said, okay, I want to be impost.
I want to leave the field industry. I want to
sell for no money to one thing it is that
makes me. People have that consens things to get up aftering.
(36:08):
So as a Christian for the whole us be for
giving the people.
Speaker 4 (36:12):
So something happens.
Speaker 7 (36:15):
Sometimes I'm watching a lot and after movie the young
lady that's only wanted to be.
Speaker 5 (36:20):
Able to help a paddle, that was the rock that
she could take a right to these journeys. But hard.
Speaker 7 (36:29):
I was suicidal until I was twenty eight years old,
and that's when I forgive myself. Everybody here half the
one to live. He's us say after one to be well.
But that's basically need the journey.
Speaker 5 (36:42):
I'm growing now. I turn and needed the purpose I
created new.
Speaker 7 (36:46):
Wave on I'm going to get together and excuse to move.
Speaker 5 (36:50):
The front and excuse to look up and exus to
do get up. That's why journey like I need to do.
If people believe in coming out here to be here,
so sing so thank you because because everyone wanted promotion
for the evil that made if it was for a.
Speaker 4 (37:19):
Moment I made.
Speaker 5 (37:22):
To change. He did it, He did it.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
We thank everyone that was watching in Courtney Cote that
was on here as she was talking about higher power,
energy and the emotional layers that women carry, women and
men carry, while her language reflect her journey, I know
for me that that higher power is God, the true healer,
(37:51):
the designer of all things, okay, the one who breaks
the chains that that bound for generations. Okay. So today,
as I'm thinking about this weight, okay, the trauma that
isn't yours, it's not your shame, it never belonged to you, okay,
and the silence passed down as a legacy we need,
(38:14):
I'm giving you permission today to get rid off that
dead weight. It is not yours to carry, all right.
We say it all the time as Christians, lay it
at the cross and leave it there, all right, all right,
that was not yours to carry. Let it go so
it doesn't weigh down further on the generations to come,
(38:38):
all right, trauma that is passed on for generations. We
need to move beyond this. We need to break the cycle.
We need to stop it, cut it right into the
root of where it is. Because generational trauma is deep,
it has so many layers into it. We have to
(39:00):
go back to generations, all right, when you read the
Bible and understand that the first murder was done by Dean, right,
but when you go through the layers, because everything started
in genesis, but it continued in King's lineage of killing people. Okay,
his son killed, his son's son killed killed the man.
(39:21):
It is that I killed the man. This one killed
the man. It transferred, all right, It transferred into his generation.
That is a spiritual transfer, all right, that continued through
the generations.
Speaker 4 (39:38):
All right. So these are the things that we need.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
To be aware of and break the generational curse in
our bloodline. There are those who were never meant to
get married. They can't get married. They have a spiritual husband,
spiritual wives that does not allow them permit them to
get married. But this is again something that was transferred
to the generation, spiritual transfer. All right.
Speaker 4 (40:03):
It's a very.
Speaker 2 (40:06):
Silent killer in families. M the spiritual generational curse that
lingers and follows.
Speaker 5 (40:23):
All right.
Speaker 2 (40:24):
So we really need to address these, identify what's in
your lineage, not just physically but spiritually. And it might
sound cliche, but you got to take it to the cross,
You got to take it to Jesus. Okay, I'm putting
(40:46):
my pastide on right now, take it to the cross
and leave it there. Take it there, he said, Well,
the song says, what can wash.
Speaker 4 (40:54):
Away my sin?
Speaker 2 (40:55):
Nothing but the blood of Jesus. What can make me
whole again? Nothing but the blood of Jesus. Okay, I
had to flip my pastor on. But it's true, all right.
You can go before mental health coaches, psychiatrists.
Speaker 4 (41:15):
You know, praying at church. But you deep.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
You have to go deep. You have to truly go
deep into yourself to dress the healing.
Speaker 4 (41:24):
All right.
Speaker 2 (41:25):
So when you're a woman of faith, there's often attention.
How do I reconcile what I've inherited? And what does
God say? Who does God say I am? Who does
God say I am? Here's a few questions here. Take
a moment and think about this question. Have you ever
felt like you are breaking rules just by telling your story?
Speaker 4 (41:52):
Just by telling your story? Have you ever felt.
Speaker 2 (41:55):
Guilt for healing while others in your family stay BoNT
while they stay bound? Or here's another question, whether what
you're caring is even yours? To begin with, you have
to asked yourself that, like, wait a minute, why am
(42:17):
I dealing with this Who opened up this door? Have
you asked yourself these questions? You breaking a cycle while
others decide to stay trapped, and you feel guilty because
you break free, or they make you feel like you
(42:40):
think you're better than them because you've broken a cycle,
you've come away from to the point you may even
get alienated by family and loved ones because some people
are babying or.
Speaker 4 (42:54):
Pacifying or have become to accept.
Speaker 2 (42:59):
It is what it is.
Speaker 4 (43:00):
Don't we say that all the time. It is what
it is, So we hold on to it is what
it is, and it continues.
Speaker 2 (43:09):
We need to break it. We need to break it. I,
for one, identified at nine years old that the generational
curse that transferred in the women in my bloodline were
they were never the married woman.
Speaker 4 (43:26):
They were always the other one.
Speaker 2 (43:28):
Four generations before me, as far as I could go,
they were the other woman. They were never the married wife,
they were never the woman who got the ring. And
they all died young, all under their forties. So at
nine years old, as a pastor was preaching, he was
(43:49):
talking about identify what's in your bloodline and your generation.
I had to go and ask questions. I had to
have my mom think like, what's there? I had to
probe before she can come to that result. So I
had to come to the question and ask what about
my grandmother?
Speaker 4 (44:07):
Was she married?
Speaker 6 (44:09):
No?
Speaker 4 (44:10):
Her mother no? And I realize here it is.
Speaker 2 (44:15):
Here is my mom for generation. She was offered the
ring many times, but for some reason it just didn't happen.
And I was like, no, it's gotta stop. I say, there,
Lord Jesus, it's got to stop. You are my higher bower.
You are my energy that I go to. It has
(44:38):
to stop, and it stops with me. Is that I
had to break this cycle. And at nine years old,
I said a prayer. Nine years old, I said a prayer,
and I said, Father, break this cycle off of my life.
Set me free, set my generations free from this bondage,
(45:01):
from this stronghold.
Speaker 4 (45:02):
Deliver me innocently. Prayed.
Speaker 2 (45:07):
I didn't have to do no sabbatical. I didn't have
to do no.
Speaker 4 (45:15):
Deep diving.
Speaker 2 (45:18):
I didn't have to sit behind no specialists. I said
the prayer to God, who is the designer, and he
heard my prayer and he answered my prayer. Literally nine
years later, because nine plus nine is what eighteen by thirteen,
(45:38):
my husband came into my life. I thought he was
just going to be a friend. But I did have
a dream at twelve years old that he came and
said to me, I want to marry you, and I'm like,
I'm a kid, I'm too young. Like I didn't answer
him the first time. I didn't answer him the second time,
the third time. Here's what I said him in the dream.
(46:00):
I've never met him before. I said, I'm still in school.
You will have to wait. At that time, I was
in an island called Abaco, because I'm from the Obamas.
I was on vacation, my very first vacation, me and
my sister. We were gone for two months. The whole
(46:23):
time that I had left. He came from Bimini, which
is another island in Obama's close to.
Speaker 5 (46:31):
Here in Florida.
Speaker 4 (46:33):
He was at my church. So while I'm having this dream,
he's already physically.
Speaker 2 (46:39):
At my church.
Speaker 4 (46:42):
I didn't know it.
Speaker 2 (46:44):
And when I got there that night, he was the
one praying. I'm like, this guy looks familiar, sounds familiar.
But it didn't dawn on me right away. It wasn't
until that Sunday when I could see his face clearly
and I was like, wow, this is the guy that
I dreamed about, but I didn't say anything to him.
(47:08):
A few months later, he comes and he befriends me,
and he's talking to me, and you know, I've always
had friends. I'm a part of the youth in youth leadership.
So I was made friends with new people that came
to church and all of that.
Speaker 4 (47:21):
It was a norm.
Speaker 2 (47:24):
And he said the question of saying he was interested
in me, I said, well, you need to go talk
to my mom. Well, like I said, nine years from
my nine year old prayer, I was married. And God
broke that cycle, which is a generational curse and also trauma,
(47:46):
because I told you these women were always be at
a woman. They went through to shame, they went through
all of this spain, they died young. But God lifted
that off of my life. I took it to the
cross and I left it there when I prayed at nine.
Now been married for thirty two years. So even if
they were said that the curse was unbroken, maybe I
(48:08):
would have been married a year, but the whole king
wasn't even that.
Speaker 4 (48:11):
The whole thing was. Even if I was.
Speaker 2 (48:12):
Only married for one year, I actually was married, meaning
I broke that curse off of my life. Now today
of my six yeardrend have two of them are married
and the two are married and the two that are
out of the own. So has God not already done it? Yes,
God has done it. So, yes he can break the
(48:35):
curse through the generations. We have to let go, let
go and leave it there total release. So I don't
know what yours is.
Speaker 4 (48:47):
I don't know if you've even identified it. There's many.
Speaker 2 (48:50):
That was just one of them that stood out to me.
As I grew older, I understood there were more. There
were things on my father's side that I had to
deal with. So that's why when you pray, you're praying
for your mother's side and your father's side. You're not
saying it one sided, because there's two people that come together, okay,
(49:14):
And in my environment and journey, not only did these
two people come together, my mom met two other men
and she had children with them. So now we have
these three different bloodlines coming together and trying to come
together as far us our understanding, how we talk to
each other, our manners, how we behave, how we think.
Speaker 4 (49:36):
So you have dealing with it.
Speaker 2 (49:37):
So it's a constant war, a constant pull a constant tug,
a constant Why don't understand me? Because we're all dealing
with all these mixes that has come in and these
are all different generational transferments.
Speaker 4 (49:57):
So as I close on today, truly let go my book.
Speaker 2 (50:04):
She emergins talks about me emerging, But I didn't. I
didn't truly come away from until I decided and give
myself permission.
Speaker 3 (50:16):
Let it go.
Speaker 4 (50:17):
It was not yours.
Speaker 2 (50:20):
Let go of the hurt, let go of the pain
and of the unforgiveness of my father not being in
my life. That was another trauma that opened up other
doors into my life.
Speaker 4 (50:32):
And my childhood.
Speaker 2 (50:34):
You can find out more of that journey. And she emerges,
I am sheep, But did it stop there? So I
encourage you today give yourself permission, release what was never
yours and let go of your own pains.
Speaker 4 (50:54):
Thank you for watching.
Speaker 2 (50:55):
This has been your host, Doctor Lyndjay would emerge and
empower bless thy teach in every one of you until
next time.
Speaker 4 (51:05):
By Buffy.
Speaker 1 (51:07):
Form where resilience meets transformation. Here we amplify voices that
have faced trials, trauma and adversity, stories that inspire hope,
healing and empowerment. Every episode brings raw, unfiltered conversations with
individuals who have risen from hardship, embracing faith, strength and purpose.
(51:29):
Join us as we break the silence, uplift one another,
and emerge stronger together. New episodes air Wednesdays at six
pm English and Saturdays at six pm, with select Saturdays
in Creole for our Haitian audience
Welcome to Emerge and Empower podcast TV, a platform where
resilience meets transformation. Here we amplify voices that have faced trials, trauma,
and adversity, stories that inspire hope, healing and empowerment. Every
episode brings raw, unfiltered conversations with individuals who have risen
(00:26):
from hardship, embracing faith, strength and purpose. Join us as
we break the silence, uplift one another and emerge stronger together.
New episodes air Wednesdays at six pm English and Saturdays
at six pm, with select Saturdays in Creole for our
Haitian audience.
Speaker 2 (00:51):
Hello everyone, welcome to Emerge and Empower with your host,
Doctor Lynn Jay and it's indeed a pleasure to have
you on the set on today. We journey each week
as we have individual come on to share their past
traumas and experiences. Today is no different as we have
our guests that will be coming on that will be
(01:12):
sharing her story. Go ahead, grab your seat, get in
your front row seat, Let your friends know that we
are connected on Emerging and Power today as we journey
through yet another story of resilience and transformation. Courtney Code
(01:34):
is a certified conscious parenting and life coach, a dedicated
Yogi and initiated Alchemists on a powerful mission to help
women break free from what's holding them back and step
fully into their highest potential. As a visionary author of
Amazon bestseller and founder of I Love Me Unconditionally, Courtney
(02:00):
blends cutting edge science, soulful wisdom, and transformative coaching to
guide women through deep healing and self love and radical empowerment.
With her unique blend of conscious parenting, expertise, mindful movement,
and Alchemists transformation, Courtney creates safe, sacred spaces where overwhelm
(02:24):
and stub women can release guilt, shame, and limiting beliefs
and emerge with clarity, confidence, and unstoppable joy. Her approach
honors a full human experience, helping women rediscover their inner
light and live a life overflowing with love, abundance, and connection.
(02:46):
Whether through one on one coaching, powerful online courses, or
immersive retreats, Courtney is committed to awakening the divine feminine
within every woman she serves. Her life's will is vibrant
call to embody unconditional self love and create ripple effects
of healing across families and communities. Let us welcome Courtney
(03:12):
on the set on today. Welcome Courtney to emerge and
empower with our audience. Let strat us one more time.
Hey everyone, let's welcome Courtney. Courtney, go ahead and introduce
yourself to our audience on today.
Speaker 3 (03:31):
Thank you, Doctor Lynn. This is Courtney Cody. So nice
to see you. I appreciate your kind words and your
time letting me share my story and journey with you.
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Yes, introduce yourself to our audience if you wish to
share a little bit more before we get right into
your story.
Speaker 3 (03:48):
Sure, thank you. Yes. I am Courtney Cody, the founder
and CEO of I Love Me Unconditionally dot com. I
am so excited to be part of a massive movement
of absolute self love, self worth and I Love Me
Unconditionally was very intentional. It's very long, but nobody says that,
(04:13):
and so there's again a lot of intention in there.
So very excited to be here.
Speaker 4 (04:19):
Thank you so much and everyone.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Once again, like I said before, this is yet another
empowerment and healing moment for each and every one of
you as you connect around the world locally and internationally.
Speaker 4 (04:34):
Courtney, We're going to dive right into your story.
Speaker 2 (04:36):
Take us to the beginning of who Courtney is, and
what was that trauma that you experience.
Speaker 3 (04:44):
Yeah, I like to say, you know, I don't think
there's a lot of big teas, but I have a
lot of little teas. So big trauma versus little traumas.
My first I would say, really big trauma was I
just witnessed family member very altered and not really present,
(05:10):
and I just was very unsafe. I felt, you know,
oh my gosh, I can't trust you know, the people
that are in my life, my caretakers, And that was
that was an interesting, you know, impactful moment for me
to put on all of my armor, if you will.
And so secondly, I think another big tea little tea
(05:31):
was my father was impatient suicidal for thirty one days
when I was eight years old, and so off and
on suicidal ideation my entire life. And again that's what
led us to my company name I Love Me Unconditionally
and the website that it is today.
Speaker 4 (05:51):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (05:52):
Wow, So can you take us to that experience as
a five year old little girl and what was going
through your mind?
Speaker 4 (06:01):
What was your understanding?
Speaker 3 (06:06):
Yeah, I had a playdate, you know, we we played
a little bit too late, probably four or five years
old again, and we're like, we're are our moms. You know,
it's midnight, like we should be in bed by now,
and head downstairs and you know they're kind of passed
out and sleeping and we're like, hey, you know, got
to go to bed. And you know that's kind of
(06:29):
at the time or my whole body, I think new
before really truly witnessing what had happened, the energy was
already there. So I had, you know, pretty visceral reaction
of just probably utterly shutting down, going into fight or flight.
And yeah, I think in that time, in that moment,
(06:52):
I just said to myself, I'm going to take care
of me. I can't trust anyone else, and I'm going
to put on my you know, my big, big girl
boots and we're going to life up.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
Wow, even today, when we think about it, even though
children are more advanced and understanding at five years old,
or any child basically in adolescent stages, should not have
to experience any such The job of the parent, of course,
is to take care.
Speaker 4 (07:25):
And nurture the child. But here you are five years
old to think this way.
Speaker 2 (07:33):
Yeah, and so the journey continues from five You said
so take us through.
Speaker 3 (07:41):
Yeah, fascinating, right. So then I mean, if we want
to just quickly fast forward to my marriage, my former marriage,
that was an interesting event also kind of a very
similar situation before I had done all the trauma work
and before I was really awakened and conscious to a
chain analysis and where it all comes from. So very
(08:03):
similar situation. You know, that individual comes let's say, back
late at night and a little bit altered or a
lot altered. And I was pregnant seven months seven months
pregnant with my first and that was pretty again impactful
(08:24):
in terms of my body just kind of shutting down
and remembering, like what where I was at that maybe
time at at five years old, right, but at the
time of that happening with the husband at the time,
it wasn't it was there's no affiliation or correlation. I
just said to myself, Wow, this is the father of
(08:45):
my children, Like how could this be? And again I'm scared,
can't trust this man? This is not okay. Now, the like,
what am I going to do?
Speaker 1 (08:57):
Right?
Speaker 3 (08:58):
My children are really are they really grow up in
this type of an environment. And so I went into,
of course masculine mode during the marriage, my feminine and
beautiful flowing femininity was not there because I was a
daughter of a marine and I learned how to protect
myself at a very young age, so I already learned
that behavior from trauma and conditions. And then in the
(09:21):
marriage when it happened again, my body just was like whoa,
And so I shut down and I went into fight
or flight and did everything myself. And you can imagine
that that dynamic did not really work. And you know,
you need polarity. You need both masculine and femininity for
(09:42):
both for both, yeah, like not just male female, but
I need to be masculine and feminine, and so he
also needs to be masculine and feminine. And we need
that polarity and young And so when that dynamic wasn't there,
then yeah, there was some challenges. So but I did
some journeying and found where it all came from, and
(10:04):
then I was beautifully enlightened. And uh, you know, COVID hit.
My dad ended up coming to live with us. He
passed away unfortunately suddenly due to pancreatic cancer. So that
was really unfortunate.
Speaker 4 (10:17):
I'm sorry for us, thank you.
Speaker 3 (10:19):
Yeah, but it was it was a beautiful learning opportunity
during that time, so that there was some silver lining
in there of my father living with us during COVID
for some time.
Speaker 2 (10:29):
So okay, so you speak about releasing the guilt and shame,
can you take us back to a time where those
emotions were shaping your life the most?
Speaker 3 (10:42):
Yeah, jeez, guilt and shame is something again. I think
we're conditioned with. I think that when we live in
an unconditional love world, we forgive ourselves, right, we have
grace for ourselves. We make mistakes, we're not perfect, and
so then we can give that grace and space to others.
But when we're conditioned, or a daughter of a marine
(11:05):
with tough love, or grew up in an environment of you know,
you need to achieve to earn my love, right, we
just inherit that. And oh, by the way, that probably
came down also from thirteen generations before me, so it's
already more or less in my DNA. I think the
(11:26):
biggest guilt and shame that I have experienced has been
before I was awakened and enlightened, was just doing something
for myself as a mom, like not being the martyr
and putting everyone else first. Right, So I felt so
guilty taking a bath. I felt so guilty going and
(11:48):
doing something for me, going to yoga, going for a walk.
I mean that was that's that's that When I think
back in hindsight, that was just I mean, we need
to us first, because otherwise we're not good for ourselves, nobody,
We're not good for anybody else. Right, we have to
put on our own oxygen mask first before we give
(12:08):
it to anybody else. But the guilt and the game
that I felt through that it was I don't know
if someone gave me permission, like, hey, Court, you really
got to take care of you first before you, you know,
take care of everybody else. Otherwise you're not going to
give everyone the best version of you, and you're doing
everybody disservice because you are so beautifully like loving and soft.
(12:30):
But when I don't take care of me first, I'm
like a bowl in a china shop. Right, So it's
very needed. I give every woman and every man, every
single human being on this planet permission to go do
you first, right, Go do you boo? Go do you first,
and then let's beautifully be there for everybody else. But
(12:52):
that's not being selfish, that's actually being responsible as like
true loving, divine human beings.
Speaker 4 (13:00):
People need to realize this.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
You must be healed in order to want to do
things for yourself. Many times it's mass and it's hidden
behind taking care of a loved one, taking care of
a child, family, and before you know it, you really
don't even know who you are, and so you've lost
touch of that, or you've had childhood traumas that you
(13:23):
didn't deal with and all of a sudden it's bam
in your face and you're like, wait a minute, who
is this person?
Speaker 4 (13:29):
All right, So in order to.
Speaker 2 (13:32):
Do you right, you have to deal with the things
about you. You have to look at yourself in the
mirror and deal with all those areas in order to
enjoy yourself. Because I'll just say the truth, and I
say this all the time. If you saw you in
the room, what you want to be your friend?
Speaker 4 (13:52):
You see? And so it starts with healing.
Speaker 2 (13:56):
And I love the fact that yourself conscious. And yes,
as a mom, you feel guilty because you want to
do something. You feel guilty because I just want to
eat it. Like can I just enjoy this by myself
without feeling guilty, or can I just go to the
movies and don't.
Speaker 4 (14:13):
Have to bring anybody with me.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
Can I just have a bubble bath without somebody walking in,
you know, because you need to have that beetime as
mother's you know, you have no privacy.
Speaker 4 (14:25):
People are in your backroom.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
When you're in the backroom, everything you're doing, someone is
always there, especially as the kids old. My kids are
older and they still tap top mom. Can I come in?
Speaker 1 (14:36):
No?
Speaker 3 (14:38):
Yeah, no, it's a boundary. And then yeah, I didn't
know that was a boundary. Yes, yes, absolutely, great completely.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
So what did letting go look like for you in
real time? Was it a moment or a process or both?
Speaker 3 (14:57):
Yeah, that's a great question. So I feel like there's
so many different kind of snowball effect. So I can
remember one letting go time where I just surrendered and
I said, I don't know what I can do for
my father. At this point in time, I was committed
to moving out to San Diego, California for a new
job from New Hampshire, north of Boston. He had just
(15:20):
gone inpatient again in Brockton Hospital, and I just was
like helpless. But I had to just let go and
surrender and do me. And I was so proud, but
I also talk about guilt and shame, like should I
be staying with my father and taking care of him
or should I be going out and doing my own life?
(15:41):
You know. So that was a big one. But I surrendered,
I let go of an accepted the process and I
was like put faith over fear and moved out to
San Diego and he got better. And that was a
tough one. You know, that was definitely a tough one.
But I think it's just trusting, letting go and letting
go odd having that half tad confidence And yeah, that
(16:05):
was one of them. There was another one I can
recall when I went on a yoga retreat in Costa
Rica and I remember them talking about surfing. We were surfing,
and you can either you know when you get when
you get knocked off the board and you you know
(16:26):
you're underwater, and you can either.
Speaker 4 (16:28):
Like one moment of getting some feedback from your bike.
Speaker 5 (16:34):
M how about now.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
Better?
Speaker 4 (16:41):
Yeah? Better?
Speaker 3 (16:44):
So in Costa Rica.
Speaker 4 (16:47):
Yeah, it's still doing it. It's like a crackling sound.
Speaker 3 (16:50):
Yeah. I can hear that too. I think I was
hearing that on your un before as well. Let me
see try to again. M hmmm, I'm hearing it before
I even start.
Speaker 4 (17:06):
Talking, right, it's mine?
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Yeah, yeah, uh huh.
Speaker 3 (17:23):
I don't know, I hear it. Why is it doing
that now? I wonder we were so good and clean before.
Speaker 5 (17:29):
I know.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
Oh no, I hear it, though I did. I did
them mute mike and then that's it. But maybe maybe
it'll just go away. We've had crazy tornadoes in Kentucky.
Maybe that's why.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
Oh okay, Well, I don't know how it's gonna sound,
because sometimes you have.
Speaker 4 (17:51):
Certain noise and background noise and then it goes away.
Speaker 2 (17:56):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 4 (17:59):
All right, so you moved away. You were talking about moving.
Speaker 6 (18:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (18:06):
I wasn't doing this before, Ham, but now all of
a sudden it started.
Speaker 2 (18:13):
I see, let me mute myself and you talk and
see if that's what that is.
Speaker 3 (18:31):
Yeah, I don't hear it at all. It's like crystal
clear now, so I let's see.
Speaker 4 (18:38):
So I'll just start.
Speaker 5 (18:41):
Mhm.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
Sorry, I repeat that.
Speaker 4 (18:47):
You said that you had moved away.
Speaker 3 (18:52):
Correct. That was the first time that I went like
I actually experienced letting go and it were out. I mean,
I surrendered, I trusted the process. That was faith over fear,
and that was a big one with my father just
kind of like from a situational moment, and then I
(19:13):
was and then and then and then secondly, I can
recall a really cool where I felt the letting go
and I felt like I experienced the letting go firsthand.
And someone had said when we were in Costa Rica
for Yoga's for retreat and we were surfing. So when
you're you know, thrown off the board and you tumble
(19:35):
and you're underwater and you're going like literally some people
resist and they try to come up to the surface
and they're resisting the water. They're not going with the flow. Literally,
they said, just let go go with the flow, go
with the water, right cover your head so your board
doesn't hit your head, but you're just going with the flow.
(19:55):
And there was something so magical about going with the
water and the current and where it was going underwater
and just literally letting go of control. And then when
it's over and that wave crashes and then it just
beautifully softens, that's when you tap there. So you're just
(20:19):
going with the flow and you're just letting go in
in it, like actually in it. So that's a really
cool process kind of twofold. Yeah, there was like one
that I almost powerfully empowered to let go. But then
there was another where I experienced truly letting go in
the embodiment, the embodiment and the feeling of what that
(20:42):
actually felt like, which was pretty cool.
Speaker 4 (20:46):
That's really wonderful.
Speaker 2 (20:47):
So we're going to go through your healing journey on
how you said you created I love me unconditionally. And
what is that message, that urgency that make you feel like,
you know, I have to love me unconditionally?
Speaker 4 (21:04):
What was that for you?
Speaker 3 (21:09):
So during COVID, my father and I, like I said,
we had some beautiful conversations and there was a silver
lining with his condition, you know, all the suicidal ideation,
and I was there for him. We had long conversations.
We had the time. It was, you know, COVID, and
we were all hunkered in and we didn't have anywhere
(21:31):
to go. So it was honestly, truly such a beautiful opportunity.
So with that we had like peeled back the onion
of my father's like the root cause and long story short,
we realized that, and I realized indirectly he taught me
(21:53):
that he never had true love, like unconditional love or
forgiveness for himself like he would have uncondonal love for
me because I'm his daughter. But he never truly had
unconditional love or forgiveness for himself because.
Speaker 5 (22:07):
They were.
Speaker 3 (22:11):
And he had so much guilt and shame. And I
was like, Dad, he would, you know, work for Easter
Seals and special needs and like you wouldn't hurt a fly.
And he was so sweet to all the kids and
the you know, strangers in the grocery line. I mean,
this man was so beautiful, a divine soul. And if
someone truly loved themselves uncontually and forgave themselves, there's no
(22:33):
way they would ever hurt them consider hurting themselves. And
so because his parents military, they never said I love
you or I'm proud of you. He learned external validation.
He learned more or less ego and getting it from
other people and other sources. So when you stop, and
when that just abruptly, acutely or chronically just stops and
(22:57):
you stop getting an external validation from people, that's a
legit depression. He didn't have, he didn't have his own
values or didn't have as an identity of living an
unconditional love and forgiveness. And so that to me is
the million dollar ticket in the yeast of the bread
of happiness of life.
Speaker 2 (23:16):
Yes, yes, indeed, indeed, I'm glad you said that, because
there's a lot of people if you try to explain
what you deal with at home versus when they're out
in public, the love they're so loving there is, but
then they don't have that same love for themselves.
Speaker 4 (23:35):
And the key here is that validation.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
What I realized with COVID is people needed to have,
you know, that community people to interact with. When that
was no longer there, people now had to think more
about themselves. They have more time to see themselves, and
a lot of people got really really depressed.
Speaker 4 (23:56):
A lot of people actually, even.
Speaker 2 (24:00):
Though we wouldn't like it or not, but we had
a lot of suicides that happened during that time because
people no longer had you know, that love one or
that community or that place to go to feel like
they belong all right, and.
Speaker 4 (24:15):
They caused a lot of depression loneliness.
Speaker 2 (24:18):
You could be in a relationship and you're and you're lonely,
let alone, you're in isolation from the norm, like walking
to the park and going to different places and you
stuck in one place, and that indeed is a journey
in itself.
Speaker 4 (24:32):
So for him it was the self love and all
of that.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
But did he have PTSD from being in the army
as well that also was a result of it.
Speaker 3 (24:45):
I would assume yeah, I would presume he had a
little maybe chronic PTSD, like call PTSD from childhood. But
then you go in boot camp and your marine and
you're hard tough love right, like there was no front lines.
But I feel like, you know, the trauma of anything
(25:06):
like that is something. So as much as it's not
like storming the beach of Normandy, it's still it's it's
relevant to fight. But I feel that again, from childhood,
maybe even in the womb, there was beautiful, unfortunate, divine
karma journeying of generational trauma that was passed through.
Speaker 2 (25:31):
It does back absolutely so yep, it does indeed. And
so as a conscious parenting coach and alchemist, let's talk
about that.
Speaker 4 (25:42):
How do you help women reconnect their voice?
Speaker 3 (25:46):
Oh my gosh, there's so many ways. But I think gratitude,
like first and foremost, is so crucial. Gratitude is it's
healing in itself. So we can make a gratitude list,
but we could also feel the gratitude. Yeah, we could
put our hand over our heart and we could just
think about all the things that I'm so grateful right
(26:09):
now in the embodiment of that. And when we actually
get into that beautiful heart space right and that HeartWare,
it's like a heart it's like a not a hardware upgrade,
it's a HeartWare upgrade. Yeah, there's something magical about this
space where it brings us from our head. Logical, you know,
all cool like you, but like down here, you know,
(26:32):
when they say, hey, like what does your heart say
or what is your what are you feeling? It's like
I don't know until I did know, but it was gratitude.
And I actually finally felt the gratitude. And so when
we can come from this space right here, I feel
like unlocks so much, right it unlocks so much. So
(26:53):
we could talk about tactics, we could talk about strategy,
but like that right there, the divine higher power, light,
whatever you want to call it, this beautiful gratitude right here,
we are born for more. Like I'm not gonna stay
stuck because I'm doing a disservice to everybody around me
if I.
Speaker 2 (27:11):
Say stuck for me, for me that gratitude and that
higher power is God, because I realized I had no
one else. So God is that divine, you know, the creator,
the designer of all things, and so therefore he always
wants us to have that oneness, you know, even when
you go to the Bible and you read scripture and text,
(27:32):
but always talks about us renew in our minds, renew
in our hearts, and these are things that we should
use practically in our every day but unfortunately we don't,
you understand, and then we just veer away so far
away that you know, we just become all disconnected. So
a woman that has come to you, that has been
(27:54):
dealing with post traumas and different things like that, before
she can be grateful, I'm sure you had to peel
certain layers in order for her to be grateful. So
what it would be like for you for meeting someone
who never saw that they had any worth in their life,
(28:14):
you know, didn't say any value to themselves?
Speaker 4 (28:17):
And how was how was that journey? How do you
tackle that?
Speaker 3 (28:23):
Yeah, that's a great question. I had to find that
with my father, and I could have given my dad
a Brazilian solutions and none of them were that were
anything didn't mean anything. The solution ended up being validation.
(28:44):
So we first start out with beautiful empathy. Wow, I
can't imagine how that feels for you. That must be
really dark and shitty. Dad, Let me hold your hand
when you.
Speaker 2 (28:57):
Just go way through this with your father walking, you're
walking him through his own personal journey.
Speaker 3 (29:07):
Wow, let me just sit here and hold your hand.
Let me just sit in the shit with you, like
excuse my French. Right, But with that pain that someone
feels heard and they feel oh my gosh, they get
it right. They can understand that too, unlocks the next step.
(29:30):
So instead of let's just go and like, what do
you want, let's go get it, it's wait, no, let's
validate this because that's not that's not okay. I don't approve, right.
We can forgive, but we don't have to approve of it.
We can forgive as we don't have to choose to
suffer any longer. We can choose to liberate and be free.
Speaker 2 (29:52):
That's the key there. Suffering choose not to suffer.
Speaker 3 (29:56):
Correct. But someone needs permission, right, they need to see
that this is not your future. Even though you got
this cards, this deck, this hand and a card deck
and we're playing a game. You can cast those seven
cards in and you can take seven more.
Speaker 4 (30:12):
Right, we have.
Speaker 3 (30:14):
Choices in this life. It's a beautiful, funny, human bound
experience with the ether up there and spirits and energy.
I mean, I agree, law of oneness is absolutely magical.
So the first and foremost is validation. You validate, validate, validate,
you know, you just you sit there and you hold
(30:35):
the space and the container. So they're finally heard, they're
finally seen, right, and they're validated, and someone understands and
someone gets it. And even if we don't understand all
of it, it's the empathy piece. And when someone feels
seen and heard, right, that's the next piece of the puzzle.
Because my father would always come out of it when
(30:55):
he felt like he was finally seen and heard and
he just wanted someone to feel his pain. I mean,
that was it, unfortunately for my father, you know. And
it was connection. That was his way of connecting. And
some people some people's connections. People, all we want is
deep love and connection, right, that's what we want, right,
like literally, deep love and connection right here. That's it.
(31:16):
Love is all. Love is it? Love is it? And
some people have an interesting way and behavior of going
after that negative or positive. So when we can at
least unlock that, then that's when we can move forward.
Speaker 2 (31:31):
Indeed, indeed, and as we are closing and letting you go,
because we will continue here, what would you say to
the women listening who feels stuck in guilt afraid?
Speaker 4 (31:44):
What would you say to that woman?
Speaker 3 (31:48):
Absolutely, I would say, first know that it is not you,
per se, it is potential energy that was passed down
to us through generations, right. And so when we can
know that that's not truly ours to carry, and we
(32:11):
have a choice of giving that sahi t back right
or transmuting it into another fifth dimension, another form of light,
then we can move on. It's literally getting rid of
the baggage that was not ours to ever carry in
the first place. And there's so many ways that we
can go back. And I to me personally and I
(32:33):
think scientifically, we are cracking a code of how it
all started in the womb, whether it be abandonment, whether
it be sadness, trauma, anxiety, that all came from the
womb when we were being magnificently, miraculously being built.
Speaker 2 (32:52):
Right, this world definitely a lot of things transferred through
the bloodline and it goes hours. We can go just
like the Bible says certain curses that curse.
Speaker 4 (33:03):
All the way into the fourth or sixth generation. So
things do linger.
Speaker 2 (33:07):
Whatever someone did not take care of it continues into
the child and so we Courtney has to leave, so
she can't continue on air, but will continue as we
talk about these generational pains and hurts that we that
are transferred. Okay, these are transferred spiritually transferred through the bloodline.
(33:29):
Just like you get sickness at a hereditary that transferred
to the bloodline, we also have spiritual things that are
transferred through the bloodline, and we need to be the
ones to say, you know what, it stops here.
Speaker 4 (33:41):
It will not continue with me.
Speaker 2 (33:43):
This ends now, so it does not continue into the
next generation.
Speaker 4 (33:48):
We see the.
Speaker 2 (33:48):
Symbol of Bruce Lee, what he went through, his son
went through. It was a cycle that was never dealt
with starting from the beginning, and it trickled down that
they dealt with that in a spiritual level. So I
really want to thank you Courtney for being here on
Emerging Empower today and we will have her information in
the bio as to how you can connect with Courtney
(34:10):
and you can reach out to her if you find
a relatable and her story is relatable, so that way
you will continue that connection with Courtney on today. Courtney,
thank you for being on the set and thanks for
having you here. Until next time.
Speaker 3 (34:26):
Thank you. I look forward to.
Speaker 2 (34:31):
Yes, thank you and bye bye.
Speaker 7 (34:43):
That I have understanding surroundings.
Speaker 4 (34:53):
That's when I realized.
Speaker 6 (34:57):
You have till to realize what is in front of
the hiss and more treated when really like that children,
I'm Sam, but I thank God more football than the journey.
Speaker 5 (35:10):
If you have a grand fo one, you have the one.
Speaker 7 (35:14):
It makes sense because it's a no. When it's a sequence,
there will be read there after.
Speaker 5 (35:20):
I was trying to surprise it up when the second,
but it didn't make sense to all. The ship basically
talks about one. I there about what I still went
arrival was not a single rella story. It was not
a first trumping story. It was a sycle that kept
(35:40):
going and I had the weak up heart. So I
live to tell the story.
Speaker 2 (35:44):
Because I couldn't like the women that at the side of.
Speaker 5 (35:46):
The same people that are out there for you tal whatever.
You don't know their story. No little girl got up
and I just said, okay, I want to be impost.
I want to leave the field industry. I want to
sell for no money to one thing it is that
makes me. People have that consens things to get up aftering.
(36:08):
So as a Christian for the whole us be for
giving the people.
Speaker 4 (36:12):
So something happens.
Speaker 7 (36:15):
Sometimes I'm watching a lot and after movie the young
lady that's only wanted to be.
Speaker 5 (36:20):
Able to help a paddle, that was the rock that
she could take a right to these journeys. But hard.
Speaker 7 (36:29):
I was suicidal until I was twenty eight years old,
and that's when I forgive myself. Everybody here half the
one to live. He's us say after one to be well.
But that's basically need the journey.
Speaker 5 (36:42):
I'm growing now. I turn and needed the purpose I
created new.
Speaker 7 (36:46):
Wave on I'm going to get together and excuse to move.
Speaker 5 (36:50):
The front and excuse to look up and exus to
do get up. That's why journey like I need to do.
If people believe in coming out here to be here,
so sing so thank you because because everyone wanted promotion
for the evil that made if it was for a.
Speaker 4 (37:19):
Moment I made.
Speaker 5 (37:22):
To change. He did it, He did it.
Speaker 2 (37:30):
We thank everyone that was watching in Courtney Cote that
was on here as she was talking about higher power,
energy and the emotional layers that women carry, women and
men carry, while her language reflect her journey, I know
for me that that higher power is God, the true healer,
(37:51):
the designer of all things, okay, the one who breaks
the chains that that bound for generations. Okay. So today,
as I'm thinking about this weight, okay, the trauma that
isn't yours, it's not your shame, it never belonged to you, okay,
and the silence passed down as a legacy we need,
(38:14):
I'm giving you permission today to get rid off that
dead weight. It is not yours to carry, all right.
We say it all the time as Christians, lay it
at the cross and leave it there, all right, all right,
that was not yours to carry. Let it go so
it doesn't weigh down further on the generations to come,
(38:38):
all right, trauma that is passed on for generations. We
need to move beyond this. We need to break the cycle.
We need to stop it, cut it right into the
root of where it is. Because generational trauma is deep,
it has so many layers into it. We have to
(39:00):
go back to generations, all right, when you read the
Bible and understand that the first murder was done by Dean, right,
but when you go through the layers, because everything started
in genesis, but it continued in King's lineage of killing people. Okay,
his son killed, his son's son killed killed the man.
(39:21):
It is that I killed the man. This one killed
the man. It transferred, all right, It transferred into his generation.
That is a spiritual transfer, all right, that continued through
the generations.
Speaker 4 (39:38):
All right. So these are the things that we need.
Speaker 2 (39:40):
To be aware of and break the generational curse in
our bloodline. There are those who were never meant to
get married. They can't get married. They have a spiritual husband,
spiritual wives that does not allow them permit them to
get married. But this is again something that was transferred
to the generation, spiritual transfer. All right.
Speaker 4 (40:03):
It's a very.
Speaker 2 (40:06):
Silent killer in families. M the spiritual generational curse that
lingers and follows.
Speaker 5 (40:23):
All right.
Speaker 2 (40:24):
So we really need to address these, identify what's in
your lineage, not just physically but spiritually. And it might
sound cliche, but you got to take it to the cross,
You got to take it to Jesus. Okay, I'm putting
(40:46):
my pastide on right now, take it to the cross
and leave it there. Take it there, he said, Well,
the song says, what can wash.
Speaker 4 (40:54):
Away my sin?
Speaker 2 (40:55):
Nothing but the blood of Jesus. What can make me
whole again? Nothing but the blood of Jesus. Okay, I
had to flip my pastor on. But it's true, all right.
You can go before mental health coaches, psychiatrists.
Speaker 4 (41:15):
You know, praying at church. But you deep.
Speaker 2 (41:18):
You have to go deep. You have to truly go
deep into yourself to dress the healing.
Speaker 4 (41:24):
All right.
Speaker 2 (41:25):
So when you're a woman of faith, there's often attention.
How do I reconcile what I've inherited? And what does
God say? Who does God say I am? Who does
God say I am? Here's a few questions here. Take
a moment and think about this question. Have you ever
felt like you are breaking rules just by telling your story?
Speaker 4 (41:52):
Just by telling your story? Have you ever felt.
Speaker 2 (41:55):
Guilt for healing while others in your family stay BoNT
while they stay bound? Or here's another question, whether what
you're caring is even yours? To begin with, you have
to asked yourself that, like, wait a minute, why am
(42:17):
I dealing with this Who opened up this door? Have
you asked yourself these questions? You breaking a cycle while
others decide to stay trapped, and you feel guilty because
you break free, or they make you feel like you
(42:40):
think you're better than them because you've broken a cycle,
you've come away from to the point you may even
get alienated by family and loved ones because some people
are babying or.
Speaker 4 (42:54):
Pacifying or have become to accept.
Speaker 2 (42:59):
It is what it is.
Speaker 4 (43:00):
Don't we say that all the time. It is what
it is, So we hold on to it is what
it is, and it continues.
Speaker 2 (43:09):
We need to break it. We need to break it. I,
for one, identified at nine years old that the generational
curse that transferred in the women in my bloodline were
they were never the married woman.
Speaker 4 (43:26):
They were always the other one.
Speaker 2 (43:28):
Four generations before me, as far as I could go,
they were the other woman. They were never the married wife,
they were never the woman who got the ring. And
they all died young, all under their forties. So at
nine years old, as a pastor was preaching, he was
(43:49):
talking about identify what's in your bloodline and your generation.
I had to go and ask questions. I had to
have my mom think like, what's there? I had to
probe before she can come to that result. So I
had to come to the question and ask what about
my grandmother?
Speaker 4 (44:07):
Was she married?
Speaker 6 (44:09):
No?
Speaker 4 (44:10):
Her mother no? And I realize here it is.
Speaker 2 (44:15):
Here is my mom for generation. She was offered the
ring many times, but for some reason it just didn't happen.
And I was like, no, it's gotta stop. I say, there,
Lord Jesus, it's got to stop. You are my higher bower.
You are my energy that I go to. It has
(44:38):
to stop, and it stops with me. Is that I
had to break this cycle. And at nine years old,
I said a prayer. Nine years old, I said a prayer,
and I said, Father, break this cycle off of my life.
Set me free, set my generations free from this bondage,
(45:01):
from this stronghold.
Speaker 4 (45:02):
Deliver me innocently. Prayed.
Speaker 2 (45:07):
I didn't have to do no sabbatical. I didn't have
to do no.
Speaker 4 (45:15):
Deep diving.
Speaker 2 (45:18):
I didn't have to sit behind no specialists. I said
the prayer to God, who is the designer, and he
heard my prayer and he answered my prayer. Literally nine
years later, because nine plus nine is what eighteen by thirteen,
(45:38):
my husband came into my life. I thought he was
just going to be a friend. But I did have
a dream at twelve years old that he came and
said to me, I want to marry you, and I'm like,
I'm a kid, I'm too young. Like I didn't answer
him the first time. I didn't answer him the second time,
the third time. Here's what I said him in the dream.
(46:00):
I've never met him before. I said, I'm still in school.
You will have to wait. At that time, I was
in an island called Abaco, because I'm from the Obamas.
I was on vacation, my very first vacation, me and
my sister. We were gone for two months. The whole
(46:23):
time that I had left. He came from Bimini, which
is another island in Obama's close to.
Speaker 5 (46:31):
Here in Florida.
Speaker 4 (46:33):
He was at my church. So while I'm having this dream,
he's already physically.
Speaker 2 (46:39):
At my church.
Speaker 4 (46:42):
I didn't know it.
Speaker 2 (46:44):
And when I got there that night, he was the
one praying. I'm like, this guy looks familiar, sounds familiar.
But it didn't dawn on me right away. It wasn't
until that Sunday when I could see his face clearly
and I was like, wow, this is the guy that
I dreamed about, but I didn't say anything to him.
(47:08):
A few months later, he comes and he befriends me,
and he's talking to me, and you know, I've always
had friends. I'm a part of the youth in youth leadership.
So I was made friends with new people that came
to church and all of that.
Speaker 4 (47:21):
It was a norm.
Speaker 2 (47:24):
And he said the question of saying he was interested
in me, I said, well, you need to go talk
to my mom. Well, like I said, nine years from
my nine year old prayer, I was married. And God
broke that cycle, which is a generational curse and also trauma,
(47:46):
because I told you these women were always be at
a woman. They went through to shame, they went through
all of this spain, they died young. But God lifted
that off of my life. I took it to the
cross and I left it there when I prayed at nine.
Now been married for thirty two years. So even if
they were said that the curse was unbroken, maybe I
(48:08):
would have been married a year, but the whole king
wasn't even that.
Speaker 4 (48:11):
The whole thing was. Even if I was.
Speaker 2 (48:12):
Only married for one year, I actually was married, meaning
I broke that curse off of my life. Now today
of my six yeardrend have two of them are married
and the two are married and the two that are
out of the own. So has God not already done it? Yes,
God has done it. So, yes he can break the
(48:35):
curse through the generations. We have to let go, let
go and leave it there total release. So I don't
know what yours is.
Speaker 4 (48:47):
I don't know if you've even identified it. There's many.
Speaker 2 (48:50):
That was just one of them that stood out to me.
As I grew older, I understood there were more. There
were things on my father's side that I had to
deal with. So that's why when you pray, you're praying
for your mother's side and your father's side. You're not
saying it one sided, because there's two people that come together, okay,
(49:14):
And in my environment and journey, not only did these
two people come together, my mom met two other men
and she had children with them. So now we have
these three different bloodlines coming together and trying to come
together as far us our understanding, how we talk to
each other, our manners, how we behave, how we think.
Speaker 4 (49:36):
So you have dealing with it.
Speaker 2 (49:37):
So it's a constant war, a constant pull a constant tug,
a constant Why don't understand me? Because we're all dealing
with all these mixes that has come in and these
are all different generational transferments.
Speaker 4 (49:57):
So as I close on today, truly let go my book.
Speaker 2 (50:04):
She emergins talks about me emerging, But I didn't. I
didn't truly come away from until I decided and give
myself permission.
Speaker 3 (50:16):
Let it go.
Speaker 4 (50:17):
It was not yours.
Speaker 2 (50:20):
Let go of the hurt, let go of the pain
and of the unforgiveness of my father not being in
my life. That was another trauma that opened up other
doors into my life.
Speaker 4 (50:32):
And my childhood.
Speaker 2 (50:34):
You can find out more of that journey. And she emerges,
I am sheep, But did it stop there? So I
encourage you today give yourself permission, release what was never
yours and let go of your own pains.
Speaker 4 (50:54):
Thank you for watching.
Speaker 2 (50:55):
This has been your host, Doctor Lyndjay would emerge and
empower bless thy teach in every one of you until
next time.
Speaker 4 (51:05):
By Buffy.
Speaker 1 (51:07):
Form where resilience meets transformation. Here we amplify voices that
have faced trials, trauma and adversity, stories that inspire hope,
healing and empowerment. Every episode brings raw, unfiltered conversations with
individuals who have risen from hardship, embracing faith, strength and purpose.
(51:29):
Join us as we break the silence, uplift one another,
and emerge stronger together. New episodes air Wednesdays at six
pm English and Saturdays at six pm, with select Saturdays
in Creole for our Haitian audience
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