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May 10, 2021 24 mins
Some people don’t necessarily set out to become leaders, but they fall into the role. While these leaders are no less effective than “intentional” leaders, they may suffer from unintended consequences, like imposter syndrome and self-doubt.

In this episode, Cindy Messaros, Director of Alberta, Canada, Workforce Essential Skills Society, talks about her own midlife career change, being a high performer with little direction, and single motherhood.

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Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:04):
And I think it's also important to take note of
the small validations and successes because one day you'll look
back and you'll see what you have done and what
you've accomplished.

Speaker 2 (00:25):
This episode features the story of Cindy Massaros, director of Alberta,
Canada Workforce Essential Skills Society. Cindy didn't set out to become.

Speaker 3 (00:36):
A leader, but her story shows us that you don't
have to be a Mark Zuckerberg or Elon Musk in
order to be an expert and an authority figure, and
when imposter syndrome and self doubt hit, you can still
tackle it head on.

Speaker 4 (00:52):
Hi, folks, I'm your host Edith Richards, and you may
know me from my podcast series Myers Briggs Question Corner
or my website at top career dot com. I've spent
the last twenty years of my career helping people get
smart about their careers, and I've found that lots of
smart people aren't successful. Why is that. I'm convinced it's

(01:16):
due to emotional intelligence. In e Q at work, I'm
bringing you inspiring people and messages to help you get
smart about your emotions. Some people don't set out to lead,
but they nonetheless find themselves in leadership positions. They may

(01:36):
have been encouraged to take on the opportunity, or they
may have just stumbled into the role. There's a term
called accidental leadership or unintentional leadership, and there's a book
titled The Accidental Leader What to Do when You're Suddenly
in Charge by Harvey Robbins. In a world where everyone
wants to lead, I find the story of my guest

(01:59):
today refreshed, wishing and inspiring because leadership was never her aspiration.

Speaker 5 (02:14):
I am so pleased to have Cindy Masseros with us today,
who's the executive director of Alberta Workforce Essential Skills Society.
Cindy has been working in the field of employment initiatives
for thirty years as a teacher, a facilitator, researcher, curriculum
developer and advocate for groups who face barriers. Since two

(02:38):
thousand and eight, as the executive director of Alberta Workforce
Essential Skills Society, which is otherwise known as OZ, she
has been a strong advocate for essential skills development, helping
to create change at an organizational level, and she has
spoken about essential skills at conferences across Canada and the US,

(03:01):
working with client organizations to provide them a product that
best meets their needs, especially for newly arrived immigrants. She's
passionate about the positive effect of the work OZ has
on people's lives and the businesses they work for. So
this is such a mouthful to say, but I am

(03:23):
so pleased that Cindy is with us today. Cindy, welcome
to EQ at Work.

Speaker 1 (03:29):
Thank you, Edith. I'm so happy to be here too.

Speaker 5 (03:32):
We are really happy to have you. I would love
for you to start us out here by telling us
a bit about your career journey.

Speaker 2 (03:41):
Sure.

Speaker 1 (03:42):
I started as a research assistant with the Alberta government
in a branch called Access Initiatives, and my role was
to figure out ways of reducing the barriers to apprenticeship
and trades employment that women, people with disabilities, youth, Indigenous
and immigrants faced. I did a couple of pilot projects

(04:04):
working with youth and mentors in the apprenticeship system, and
I wrote to train the trainer manual for journeymen to
connect better with youth regarding the trades. They often would
get called in to do career talks at schools and
they didn't really know how to connect with his students
very well, So that was one of my jobs. Of

(04:24):
those groups, I had a particular interest in immigrants and
the barriers that they faced. So I went back to
university to get a postgraduate diploma in teaching English as
a second language. I taught ESL for twenty years in
Canada and abroad before I stumbled on a framework called
Workplace Essential Skills.

Speaker 5 (04:44):
So workplace essential skills, so it sounds like that's something
very similar to what we do in the US with
workforce development.

Speaker 1 (04:54):
This is a theoretical framework and it's based on the
international adult literacy surveys. Oh liice, Okay, yeah, so I
don't know. So there are nine skills and there are
five complexity levels, and like it's a whole theoretical framework.

Speaker 5 (05:08):
So that kind of piqued your interest, especially when you're
talking about immigrants who are at all of these different
skill levels.

Speaker 1 (05:15):
I imagine absolutely, And I thought that in addition to language,
that this was really a missing piece of the puzzle
related to their employment barriers, because getting a good job,
like getting a job and retaining it and getting promoted,
it takes a different kind of knowledge than what pure
language teaching will bring. So I became credentialed as an

(05:39):
essential skills profiler, which meant that I could go to
a workplace and analyze tasks and complexity levels to see
where and what kind of training might be needed. This
particular training didn't help me for a couple of years,
so things were pretty rough during that time. But one day,
kind of out of the blue, I had all to

(06:00):
join a think tank, and shortly after that, I was
invited to manage a project working with immigrants for this
organization that I'm now with. I had a full time
job at the moment at that moment, but I really
wanted to manage the project, so essentially I had to
work two full time jobs for a period of time.
So working two full time jobs is not maybe the

(06:22):
best professional decision to make. Anyway, I ended up not
having my contract renewed at the college that I was
working at.

Speaker 2 (06:29):
In essence, I was.

Speaker 1 (06:30):
Fired, and it was devastating and I was ashamed and
I felt frightened for my future.

Speaker 5 (06:37):
Oh no, I'm so sorry to hear that getting let
go from a job like that, especially under those circumstances.
I mean, I can't imagine how awful that must have
been for you.

Speaker 1 (06:49):
It was really scary.

Speaker 2 (06:50):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (06:51):
Yeah, Being let go from a job is one of
the most difficult experiences anyone will face, and when you're
a single other trying to get by and make a
good life for your kids, it's just that much scarier.
We know that losing a job and searching for a
new one takes a toll on both our physical and

(07:11):
mental health and can create higher levels of anxiety, frustration,
and depression. This makes sense because with job laws, you've
lost your routine and the security of having a regular paycheck.
The COVID pandemic has made these struggles even worse, and
women have been hit especially hard. Women have lost more

(07:34):
jobs as the result of the pandemic, and according to
the Bureau of Labor Statistics, more women are quitting their
jobs in order to take care of their school aged children.
But quitting isn't an option for most single moms. The
fact is that the future is very uncertain and it's

(07:54):
very scary if you're tuning in and you find yourself
in this situation. In addition to reaching out to your
local jurisdiction for assistance, be sure to check community organizations
in your area, including religious organizations, as many offer resources
or will point you in the direction of additional services.

(08:17):
Online support groups can be a huge help too, And
when you're ready to begin your job search, be sure
to have an active, up to date LinkedIn profile as
well as a targeted resume. But before any of that,
you have to bounce back from the blow of losing
your job. And this is where we pick up the

(08:37):
conversation with Cindy.

Speaker 5 (08:39):
How did you bounce back from that?

Speaker 4 (08:42):
Well?

Speaker 1 (08:43):
I had this job as project manager, and at that
time it was only four days a month, and the
woman that had hired me had passed away, and so
I ended up having just kind of being responsible for
the entire higher society. So I had to learn a lot.

(09:03):
I was a single mom with two small kids at home,
and I guess I just had no way to go
but forward. So with the society, I ended up with
the responsibility of finishing the project and writing reports and
reporting to the board. And I have to admit I
didn't even know what a board was at that time,
oh well, or what their role was. I had to

(09:26):
make sure that contractors and consultants had been paid off,
and basically all of the boxes from the organization were
brought to my house, and I had no frame of
reference for what I was supposed to do, so I
just started sifting through them.

Speaker 5 (09:39):
So you were kind of thrust into this role or
on this project, and you didn't really have any support,
and you know, I can't even imagine that. Not only
did you not know where to turn, you probably at
that point didn't even know what questions to ask.

Speaker 1 (09:54):
Yeah, you know, I look back and wonder why I
even tried to keep it going. I didn't know anything
about nonprofit or boards, or writing proposals or budgets, or
seeking funding or writing contracts and hiring people. I didn't
know anything about that.

Speaker 5 (10:08):
But you did have a passion for the work that
they do, and it was almost like that was your
guiding light, Like that was what sparked you into this role.

Speaker 2 (10:18):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (10:19):
Absolutely, I mean I had like a demographic that I
wanted to figure out how to help them.

Speaker 5 (10:25):
It sounds like you're figuring it out.

Speaker 1 (10:27):
Yeah, I think so. You know, when I think back
to where I was, I was one person doing all
the work, and now we've got I don't know, maybe
fifteen people working at this organization. You know, I think
that it was in many ways easier to build the organization.
Then it would have been to step into something large

(10:50):
that was already functioning. So I think in some ways
being able to build was probably easier. I think, you know,
if I had applied for that job, the hiring probably
would have laughed at my resume. But I started with
one project and a great colleague, And that's really important
to state that had a colleague that I worked with
who I trusted, and we worked really well together and

(11:12):
we just you know, kind of grew ourselves and grew
the organization.

Speaker 5 (11:16):
It just goes to show how important it is to
have that trust and that good working relationship with our colleagues.
And I also think that's something a lot of people
don't sometimes, just in the corporate hustle bussel, we tend
to miss that. So it just sounds like that was
your saving grace.

Speaker 1 (11:33):
Yeah, it was. And I had a very supportive well,
I had a supportive board member. There were three board members,
and two of them resigned right when I was starting,
so I worked with this one board member and we
slowly built up the board as well. Yeah, so I
had a lot of support from that person too.

Speaker 5 (11:51):
Well, that's great to hear. I am so interested in
your story, Cindy, particularly because you didn't seek out a
leader ship role and you were, you know, kind of
thrust into this position and in growing this organization. It's
such a huge success. I wonder what it is about
your character that has allowed you to succeed in this role.

(12:16):
M hmm.

Speaker 1 (12:16):
Well, I think my process was just sheer, hard work
and determination. There were probably two years that I worked
every evening and almost every weekend, and I also felt
a sense of responsibility to the society and the people
that they were working with at that time, and somehow
all of the pieces just landed in my lap literally,

(12:37):
and I felt I had to make it work. So
I guess I'd have to say persistence. For the first
five years, we were never sure we would be operating
the next year. In twenty thirteen, we've got a huge
project to test a new theory in the employment world,
and one thing after another beyond my control kind of
threatened its success. But I just wasn't willing to give up.

(12:59):
I kept looking for and trying out new things and
finding different supports, and in the end we succeeded in
that project. And I think maybe also needing a challenge,
I had a really great job that I was good
at and it didn't really require too much extra effort.

(13:19):
I was off work early every day, and I had
enough time to exercise and have a social life. But
something felt like it was missing, and I just I
remember that feeling, and I'm wondering, like, why couldn't I
be happy with that? So I think being genuine and
curious and not afraid to ask for help goes a
long way too.

Speaker 5 (13:38):
I think that's really interesting there, what you said too
about you know, there was something missing. There was sort
of a challenge that's missing there, and you couldn't quite
put your finger on it. And then all of a
sudden you got a whole lot of challenges there kind
of thrown at you. But the great thing was I
don't think it was anything more than you could handle,
because it sounds like you've done great with it.

Speaker 2 (14:00):
You know.

Speaker 5 (14:00):
Society tells us that career success means climbing the corporate ladder,
and leadership is this way to reward people for all
of their hard effort. However, it often comes without any direction,
and that certainly sounds like the case with you. It's
just assumed that when we get to a certain point,

(14:22):
in our careers. This is what you get. And one
of the biggest ironies again that I've heard you mentioned,
is how you didn't seek out this role. And it
sounds like to me you don't necessarily think of yourself
as a leader, or maybe there's even that hesitation there
about being a leader. How do you come to terms
with that?

Speaker 1 (14:44):
Yeah, all of that is so true, and it's interesting.
In this job, we get called lots of times by
companies who have promoted an employee to a leadership position,
primarily because the employee was a good employee, but once
in the leadership position, they find that the employee doesn't
have the skills or support to be a good leader.

(15:05):
And I can really empathize with that. That's basically what
happened to me. Yeah, But from my role right now,
I'm surrounded by a great team of talented people, a
supportive board, and colleagues across the country who I've learned
a lot from. I believe they've contributed to my leadership skills,

(15:26):
and through time, this space of leadership has become softer
for me. It's like with gaining and refining any skill
or competency, you have to do the work and that
can be painful, and it still sometimes is, but for
the most part, I feel like I've come through the
other side.

Speaker 4 (15:46):
At this point in the conversation, we began talking about
how Cindy was able to come through to the other side.
As she mentioned, this was where the conversation turned to
imposter syndrome. According to the Americans Psychological Association, impostor syndrome
is a phenomenon that often occurs among high achievers who,

(16:08):
for whatever reason, cannot internalize and accept their success. Instead,
they attribute their success to luck rather than ability. They
may also fear that others will find out that they're
actually a fraud. Imposter syndrome seems to be more common
among people who are embarking on a new career path

(16:31):
or are in a new role where they're expected to
function at a capacity that they don't believe they're ready
to handle, and it's estimated that up to seventy percent
of us will experience it. It goes hand in hand
with perfectionism, either spending more time than necessary on work

(16:52):
or procrastinating believing they won't be able to meet the
high standards. In our society today, there's huge pressure to
achieve and the real problem with imposter syndrome is that
even if you do well at something, you still have
this anxious feeling inside that you're just not good enough.

(17:12):
We don't want our self worth to be contingent upon
our outward achievements. Yet there are so many messages in
the media, in our education systems, in consumer culture, and
in social media in general that fuel impostor syndrome, and
it's so hard not to internalize those messages. We must

(17:35):
look a certain way to be successful, that's a big one,
and these messages can trigger us to unknowingly compare ourselves
to others. Why can't I do that? The reality is
that the seemingly flawless life this other person is living
isn't their reality. It's just what they want you to see.

(17:56):
Though this may sound counterintuitive, one of the best ways
to cope, especially if you're in a helping profession like Cindia's,
is to help others. If you see someone who's new
to the group or who seems like they're awkward or alone,
ask that person questions and try to get to know them.
In providing help and reassurance to them, you'll provide reassurance

(18:21):
and validation to yourself and will boost your confidence, making
you feel less alone.

Speaker 5 (18:29):
What advice would you give to others who are in
similar positions or who have a similar journey.

Speaker 1 (18:38):
H Well, I guess I would say, do not let
fear stop you from going through with something, and be curious,
be prepared, and work hard. And I think it's also
important to take note of the small validations and successes
because one day you'll look back and you'll see what

(19:00):
you have done and what you've accomplished.

Speaker 5 (19:02):
Yeah, well said, I mean, there's so few of us
who actually take the time to acknowledge and celebrate our successes,
you know, rather than just checking them off a box.
And it's so important to be able to do that
and to really internalize everything that you've accomplished.

Speaker 1 (19:21):
I agree, Edith, So Cindy, I.

Speaker 5 (19:24):
Really appreciate you sharing this story with us. And the
one thought that I'm left with after talking to you
is just how how just this passion that you have
ignited into just a larger reach that you have with
more people. And I know it wasn't what you thought
that you'd be doing, probably at this point in your life,

(19:45):
but you and everyone who does this type of work
are so needed in our world today, So thank you
so much for all you do. If anybody's listening out
there who wants to get in touch with you, how
would you like them to get in touch.

Speaker 1 (20:00):
I have a profile on LinkedIn, so that would be
the perfect place.

Speaker 5 (20:04):
Okay, that sounds great and I will include a link
to your profile in the listening notes then, Cindy Maserra's
thank you again for joining us for EQ at work.
Appreciate you taking the time today.

Speaker 1 (20:17):
Thank you, Edith.

Speaker 4 (20:29):
Anyone who has taken an introductory psychology course knows about
Abraham Maslow and his hierarchy of needs. These needs are
described as survival, security, belonging, self esteem, and self actualization.
The premise is that as humans climb a ladder of needs,

(20:50):
reaching for the next highest rung, as the previous the
need has been met. In emotional intelligence, the element of
self actualization is that pursuit of meaning, striving to achieve
personal goals and self improvement. This skill tends to be
associated with feelings of self satisfaction, and people who are

(21:12):
highly skilled in self actualization search for a deeper, richer
meaning in their lives. They enjoy the process of learning,
They set meaningful goals and work to achieve them. It
is a skill often associated with exceptional leadership. Cindy mentioned

(21:33):
three things that speak to both her leadership tendencies and
her skill in self actualization. First, be yourself and be authentic.
Don't try to be someone else. Cindy didn't worry too
much about leadership styles, communication tricks, or other tactics. The
most effective way for her to lead is just to

(21:56):
be herself unapologetically, and Cindy did a lot of uncomfortable
things that got her out of her comfort zone. By
virtue of our own human nature, we do things that
we like and enjoy. However, when we start doing uncomfortable things,

(22:16):
we grow, as Cindy did. Third, Cindy mentioned that one
of the biggest reasons for her success is due to
the fact that she works with great people. So surround
yourself with people who inspire you. Who you work with
is equally, if perhaps not more, important than what you

(22:41):
work on and where you work. If your colleagues don't
inspire you, you're not in a growth environment. To become
more self actualized. Ask yourself questions like these, what are
some of the things that you truly enjoy doing? How
do you currently make time to do these things. What

(23:04):
areas in your leadership would you like to further develop
and why is it important for you to develop these areas?
How can you incorporate these things that you enjoy into
your leadership development considering your current lifestyle today.

Speaker 2 (23:25):
Thanks for listening to EQ at Work. Find us using
the hashtag EQ at work or visit our website eq
at work dot net. Subscribe to this podcast via iTunes, speaker,
or your favorite podcast platform. We'd love you to leave
a rating or review, and if you have a moment,
a simple share would be wonderful. Remember tell your friends.

(23:49):
Mastering your emotions matters. Next week's episode is on the
trauma and recovery of sexual abuse. We do hope you'll
tune in. Due to the sensitive nature of the topic,
listener discretion is advised.
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