August 5, 2025 • 30 mins
A sitcom that portrays the everyday life of a typical American family, focusing on the father's guidance and wisdom. The show combines humor with moral lessons. Explore a world of immersive, ad-free audio experiences from nature sounds to timeless stories at https://www.adfreesounds.com
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
My dear, is Maxwell House the desk coffee in the
whole world.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Well, your father says so, and your father knows best.
Speaker 3 (00:16):
Yes, it's father knows best.
Speaker 4 (00:17):
Transcribed in Hollywood, Sorry, Robert Young's father. A half hour
visit with your neighbors, the Andersons, brought to you by
Maxwell House, the coffee that's bought and enjoyed by more
people than any other brand of coffee at any price.
Maxwell House always good to the last drop. Once upon
(00:50):
a time, there was a popular little jingle that went
something like this, needles and pins. Needles and pins. When
a man marries, his trouble be gimes. Well, as my
wife will probably tell you and me, that isn't always
the case, even after his children are born. A man
shouldn't figure on more than an average amount.
Speaker 3 (01:11):
Of trouble, it says here.
Speaker 4 (01:13):
But when a man like Jim Anderson makes a date
for his entire family and has to get them all
dressed and out of the house at a specific time, Brother,
that's trouble like this, Margaret, for the love of.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
Pete, I'm all finished in the kitchen.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Deer. You should have finished two hours ago. I told
you what mister Gribbles said.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
It won't do you any good to shout, Jim. I
had to put the roast in the oven, Margaret.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
Do you realize that it's almost one o'clock? And I
promised mister.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Gribbles was only twelve thirty.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
But if he's nice enough to invite us to the
tennis matches as his guests, hey, the least we can
do is be ready on time.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
We'll be ready on time.
Speaker 5 (01:50):
Bad.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
What is it, Bob?
Speaker 5 (01:53):
Did you see my blue sweater?
Speaker 3 (01:55):
No? I didn't see your blue sweater.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Did you look in your top drawer, dear?
Speaker 3 (02:00):
No? Well look in it?
Speaker 2 (02:03):
Okay, Jim, there isn't anything to worry about, really, there isn't.
I'll comb my hair and put on a hand.
Speaker 3 (02:11):
I'll comb your hair less than an hour ago.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
That's right now. I'm going to comb it again. Do
you have any objections?
Speaker 3 (02:17):
I go ahead, honey, Thank you, and see if you
can't make those kids move a little faster? Will you?
And the one that's Gribble again?
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Tell him we're leaving right now?
Speaker 3 (02:28):
Oh? Sure?
Speaker 6 (02:30):
Hello?
Speaker 3 (02:31):
Jim is JP Gribble? Hello? JP?
Speaker 4 (02:33):
We would just Jim for your car, hold all of us, yad.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Just a minute, JP, Bud your father is on the phone.
Speaker 5 (02:41):
But it isn't in the top drawer, Jim.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
I just wanted to make sure I'll be with you
a second, JP, look in the bottom drawer, I did.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Did you look on the closet shelf.
Speaker 5 (02:53):
Hey, that's a good place, Jim.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
Just one more second, JP, honey, will you please go
upstairs here?
Speaker 2 (02:59):
I forgot to fix the time around the other.
Speaker 7 (03:01):
But mark back.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
I don't know. Hello, You're sure I'm not interfering with anything? Oh? No, uh?
What was it? JP? Jim? Will you have room for
me in your car? Of course? That's all I wanted
to know. I'll see you in a short time, I hope,
(03:25):
or we'll be leaving right away. JP. Bye, see your leader, Jim.
Thank you, JP, stuffy old dad. But if you call
me once more, so help me.
Speaker 5 (03:34):
But the closet it isn't anywhere.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
Then wear something else.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
The good thing I thought of it. We'd have had
no dinner when we got back.
Speaker 5 (03:43):
But I want to wear the gray slacks and they
go together.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
Bud, What blue sweater are you talking about?
Speaker 8 (03:50):
My blue sweater, the one Aunt Martha gave Dad for Christmas.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
This blue sweater.
Speaker 5 (03:59):
I can't find it anyplace.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
But it's my sweater and I'm wearing it. Oh, Margaret,
for the love of Heaven, will you please go up stairs.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
I'd have been ready five minutes ago if you hadn't
kept me here talking.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Eh. I'm sorry, honey. I won't let it happen again.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
I certainly haven't held anything up. Besides, since I got
out of bed this morning.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
I don't know how Solomon ever stood it. Hi, Father,
Well don't you look pretty?
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Thank you, kind sir?
Speaker 3 (04:37):
She said, yes, sir. Is a wait a minute, is
that a new dress?
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Well it's I have to find my yellow bray.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
Fot you stay right here. Who said you could buy
a new dress?
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Well, they were.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
Having a sale.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Hi, Daddy, you look fine, kitten, Betty, since when do
you take it upon yourself?
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Kathy, you didn't comb your hair. That's a big fib.
I certainly did comb my hair. You certainly did not.
I certainly did.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
Father.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
Her hair is all over her face. Well that's the
way I like.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
It, Kathy, go upstairs and comb your hair.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
But I just did.
Speaker 3 (05:18):
Well, go upstairs and have your mother combed for you.
She whizz.
Speaker 1 (05:22):
Everybody makes such a big fuss, and for what it's hair?
Speaker 9 (05:30):
Father, if you don't do something about that child, never mind.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
About that child, and put your hat on. I'd like
to get one of you, ready.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Yes, father, dare?
Speaker 3 (05:39):
Oh now what is it?
Speaker 5 (05:42):
I can't find the gray slax.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
You mean my gray slax?
Speaker 5 (05:47):
I can't find them any plays.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
I'm wearing them.
Speaker 5 (05:52):
You're wearing the slacks too.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
They're mine, aren't they? Well? Sure, wait a minute, haven't
you even put your pants on? Oh?
Speaker 5 (06:02):
Good, when you're wearing.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
These, aren't your pants? Holy? Call other?
Speaker 1 (06:12):
I don't know what happened to my beret?
Speaker 3 (06:14):
Well, wear's something else? I here the whole Hello, Jim,
this is JP. JP. I'm awfully sorry, but you know
how it is with children. Mother beddy for crying out loud?
What is that? Jim? I said we'll be leaving here
in less than five minutes?
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Did you call me beddy?
Speaker 5 (06:31):
Well?
Speaker 3 (06:31):
See that you do. You don't have to worry about
a thing, JP, I can't find my beret, which one, dear,
don't forget?
Speaker 4 (06:38):
The first match starts pumptly into a clop.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
Yes, dear, ye one with a feather, Betty, would you please?
I said we're leaving in two minutes. Well say that
you don't take any long, all right, JP, we'll be
right along, bad tempored old fossil.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
I send your your bart of the cleaners. Oh, mother,
you couldn't.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
Don't tell her she couldn't. She did, But but how
many times have you been told?
Speaker 8 (07:11):
That was pretty quick? Conden, I need bother to take
my shoes off when I put my pants on.
Speaker 3 (07:19):
You're a genius. Ah, go on, father?
Speaker 2 (07:25):
What am I going to do about what?
Speaker 1 (07:27):
I can't go without a hair?
Speaker 3 (07:29):
Well? That isn't the only hat you own, is it?
Speaker 1 (07:31):
You just don't understand.
Speaker 9 (07:33):
Margaret Diddy, come up here and put on your brown straw.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
See that's an idea.
Speaker 9 (07:39):
I'll be right there, mother, Margaret, we'll be right down.
Speaker 3 (07:44):
Jim, Oh my aching back.
Speaker 8 (07:48):
Well, what are we waiting for?
Speaker 3 (07:51):
But bend over and pick up the quah? No, I'd
better not that. Not fut never mind, son, it was
just an idea.
Speaker 8 (08:08):
I didn't see anything to pick up.
Speaker 3 (08:09):
But let's forget the whole thing.
Speaker 9 (08:12):
Day.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Do I look better? Now?
Speaker 3 (08:14):
You look fine, kitten? Where's your mother?
Speaker 1 (08:16):
She'll be down in the second. She's helping Betty find
her gloves.
Speaker 3 (08:20):
She left them right here, Margaret. Betty's gloves are on
the whole table.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Those aren't the.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Right one, Dear, I need the one to.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
Go with my brown straw.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
It isn't possible. The whole thing is just a bad dream.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Why does she need gloves anyway?
Speaker 2 (08:37):
It isn't cold, boy.
Speaker 8 (08:38):
Are you dumb? Girls don't wear gloves to keep warm?
Speaker 1 (08:42):
They don't, of course not.
Speaker 8 (08:44):
They warm so they won't have to wash their hands.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
Say that's an idea, But Kathy has enough silly ideas
of her own.
Speaker 3 (08:56):
She doesn't need any of yours.
Speaker 8 (08:57):
That isn't my idea. Stevie long towd me, and he's
got four sisters.
Speaker 1 (09:02):
Golly, if I had enough gloves, I could go for
a hole of year.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
Now do you see what you're starting?
Speaker 1 (09:09):
If I got him long enough, I wouldn't have to
wash anything.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Hark, I'm coming jee.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
What's keeping Betty now?
Speaker 2 (09:18):
Not a thing, dear. She'll be down as soon as
she changes her shoes.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Her shoes? What was wrong with the shoes she had on?
Speaker 2 (09:24):
They didn't go with her hat and gloves?
Speaker 1 (09:27):
Mommy, may I have a pair of gloves.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
We'll see.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
Dear Margaret, you know what an important client gribble is?
How can you do this to me.
Speaker 2 (09:35):
We're not doing a thing to you, dear.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
Hurry up, Betty, I can't find me down to my
brown Brian.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
Oh no, Betty, you don't have to change your dress.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
I already did.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
If Gribbel wants to know why we're late, I'll just
tell him the Andersons don't go anywhere on time. We
have to worry about gloves and shoes and hats.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Well, you certainly didn't want Betty to go out with
excess streets that didn't match, did you.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
Of course not. They've probably have thrown the whole bunch
of us in jail.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
What, Kathy another joke?
Speaker 3 (10:11):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
I don't get it, Betty. I'm right here, father.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
I don't believe that. Jim.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Let's not waste any more time.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
I just Margaret, you seem to forget I was ready
to leave an hour ago.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
Well then don't stand there, oh Margaret. I'm sure I
left one of the kitchen windows open.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
Bud, Yes, man, Bud, you stay right where you are.
But Mom said I closed all the windows. But every
time we go anywhere, we spend a half hour checking
on the windows and doors. But not this time. This
time I took care of everything personally. Well, if you're sure,
all right, Betty, Kathy, bud.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Mommy didn't tell me about the class.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
Have all afternoon to talk about.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Mother, Do you think these shoes?
Speaker 3 (11:02):
Those are the shoes you're going to wear, Betty, so
you'd better get used to them.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
But if chumping creepers, what are.
Speaker 8 (11:09):
You kicking about? I was figuring on wearing my blue sweater.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
It is not your blue sweater.
Speaker 8 (11:15):
Well, I wear it all the time.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
Why, Jim, you took the car out. How thoughtful?
Speaker 3 (11:21):
Oh yes, I had it all very carefully planned, except
for a few minor things like hair and yellow berets.
Speaker 8 (11:28):
And I didn't hold anybody up. I was ready a
long time ago, Jim.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
All right, everybody, let's go. It's probably just gribble. Kathy,
get away from those flowers, but I need.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
One for my hair.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
Jim, it might be important.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
Honey, I give you my word. Well, take the kids
out to the car and I'll be with you two.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Seconds, all right, dear, come along, children, boy, I.
Speaker 8 (11:50):
Will never get started.
Speaker 1 (11:51):
Try not to be too long. Father, we're late enough now.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
If it is gribble, I've got a good mind to
tell him to take his tennis matches and his private
box and his insurance business, and hello, haven't you left yet? Well,
as a matter of fact, JP, never mind the excuses. Look,
(12:17):
would you do me a favor in the way over?
I'd love to JP. You see, we were already out
the door and stile up at Peterson Cigar Store at
Cypressoon Hill and ask Louis. I wait a minute, JP,
I'll write it down. Go ahead, JP, Peterson Cigar Store, yes,
Cypress Hill, Yes.
Speaker 4 (12:33):
Ask for Louis, yes, and tell him to give you
a box of my special cigars.
Speaker 3 (12:37):
Right? Is that all? JP? Just one more thing?
Speaker 5 (12:42):
Hurry now.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
You will bab boom. Now I'm an errand boy have
to pick up cigars first thing. You know, he'll be
asking me to babysit these grandchildren. I don't know why
I ever went into the insurance business anyway. There must
be an easier way to make a living.
Speaker 2 (13:08):
Was it anything important, dear?
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Oh? Yes, very important. We have to stop and pick
up some cigars for mister Gribble.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Well that won't take very long, will it. Father?
Speaker 1 (13:17):
If you don't.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Hurry off, Betty, If I hear one more word out
of you, so help me, I'll lay you across my
knee and spank you. Adah boyd Dad, and you'll be next.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
Jim. There's no point in just standing there.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
Well, there's also no point in my getting in till
I find the car keys.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
Did you lose them?
Speaker 3 (13:36):
Father, No, I didn't lose them. Well are they right
where they always are, in the same ring as the
Oh my gosh, Jim, what is it the keys? I
put them down on the telephone table, Margaret, Do you
have your keys with you? Why?
Speaker 2 (13:52):
No, dear, As long as we were all going to
beat again.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
I left mine and my other purse.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Well, that's fine, that's just great, Daddy. No car keys,
no house keys, Daddy.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
You know what?
Speaker 3 (14:05):
What is it? Kathy?
Speaker 1 (14:06):
We're gonna be lay.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
Well?
Speaker 6 (14:24):
How anyone can make a mistake, can't they? It's just
that father sometimes seems to overdo it. Nonetheless, ladies, there
are many times when the man of the house just
can't make a mistake. For example, when it comes to
judging truly good coffee, your husband is right every time,
for he's the world's greatest coffee expert. Of course, we're
(14:46):
often rated as experts too. More families do enjoy our
Maxwell house coffee than any other brand. But when your
husband sits down to enjoy a satisfying, heartwarming cup of
your coffee, why he's the only the expert who matters.
And tomorrow, if you'll fill his cup with the rich,
hearty flavor of our Maxwell House, we're sure he'll smile
(15:09):
and say that's really delicious coffee. Yes, ma'am, that's what
he'll say. Fact is, we'll return your money if he doesn't.
You see no other coffee taste like Maxwell House, because
no other coffee is made like Maxwell House. That famous
good to the last drop flavor can come only from
a very special recipe, one that demands certain fine coffees
(15:33):
blended just so, and that recipe belongs to Maxwell House alone. Tomorrow,
then serve the world's best coffee, our Maxwell House, to
your husband. If he doesn't say that's wonderful coffee, just
send us the can an unused portion, and we'll refund
your money. Our address is right on every familiar blue tin. Yes,
(15:56):
let the coffee expert you married enjoy coffee with the
world's most famous flavor, our Maxwell House coffee, always good
to the last drop.
Speaker 4 (16:16):
A slightly illiterate philosopher once explained Einstein's theory in this matter.
If you kiss your girl for an hour, it seems
like a minute, But if you sit on a stove
for a minute, it seems.
Speaker 3 (16:27):
Like a year. That's relativity.
Speaker 4 (16:30):
Well, it's only seconds later outside the white frame house
on Maple Street, but the Andersons feel that they've been
on the hot seat much longer than that.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
Like this, Margaret, Jim, there wasn't any sense in my
taking all the things out of my large purse. And
as long as you were.
Speaker 3 (16:47):
Going to be with us, what if something happened to me?
What if I were run over?
Speaker 2 (16:50):
Dear, You'd still have your keys, wouldn't.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
You, Bettie, You spent a whole year pleading for your
own keys, but.
Speaker 9 (16:59):
You can't telling me to hurry, and I didn't have
time to switch everything.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
I'll bet you've got your lipstick.
Speaker 9 (17:05):
Well, naturally, you wouldn't want me to go out in
public practically naked, would you?
Speaker 3 (17:11):
Any luck? Bud?
Speaker 8 (17:12):
Now, if I tried the windows and they're all.
Speaker 3 (17:14):
Lot, that's fine, that's just great. The one time I
remember to lock all the windows and nobody has a key.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
You know, Dad, if I had a key, Bud, this
is not the time.
Speaker 8 (17:25):
But other fellas have keys, and if you let me
have one.
Speaker 3 (17:28):
Fifteen aren't supposed to have their own keys.
Speaker 8 (17:30):
Joe Phillips is only fifteen.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
You weren't Joe Phillips, I know, but he has.
Speaker 8 (17:34):
Keys that don't even fit anything.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
I've got a good idea. Why don't we break the window?
Speaker 3 (17:44):
I got a better idea? Why don't Jim? I was
only gonna tell it to keep still?
Speaker 1 (17:51):
Oh well, how else do we get in?
Speaker 3 (17:54):
We'll find a way somehow if you let me have
a key. But stop that, Holy cop, spend the whole
morning sitting around doing nothing matter?
Speaker 6 (18:04):
Jim?
Speaker 3 (18:05):
Something wrong? Oh no, everything's just fine. You look like
everything's just fine. What's the problem?
Speaker 1 (18:12):
Day forgot his keys?
Speaker 3 (18:14):
That's right. Blame the whole thing on me.
Speaker 2 (18:17):
Well didn't you locked out?
Speaker 6 (18:18):
Eh?
Speaker 3 (18:20):
We're supposed to pick up all Man Gribble in ten
minutes and the car keys are inside on the telephone table. Nice,
isn't it? You know? Even for you, that's quite a mess,
even for me. Well, Jim, let's face, we don't get
into trouble any more than any other family in the neighborhood. No, no, okay.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
Daddy Kathy for crying out loud, but I want.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
To tell Daddy, I've got an idea. How about having
Kathy break a window?
Speaker 8 (18:53):
Ed?
Speaker 3 (18:53):
Well, she breaks mine all the time.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
I don't mean to mister Davis.
Speaker 3 (18:59):
Dad, if there's any other way of doing it, I'd
just as soon not break any window. Well, it was
just an idea, Dad.
Speaker 1 (19:06):
Maybe we could have Cabby climbed down the chimney.
Speaker 3 (19:09):
I'll say this for you, Betty. You may not come
up with a lot of suggestions, but when you do,
there's certainly no good. What is it, Bud?
Speaker 8 (19:18):
The phone's ringing.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
Well, what do you want me to do? Crawl through
the keyhole?
Speaker 8 (19:24):
I was just telling you, Daddy.
Speaker 3 (19:26):
Kathy, please don't bother me. You know we're never going
to get in if somebody doesn't come up with an idea.
Speaker 8 (19:32):
Do you have a hairpin?
Speaker 3 (19:33):
Mom?
Speaker 2 (19:34):
I imagine, so why I can pick the law.
Speaker 3 (19:37):
Now wait a minute, Bud, it isn't very hard dead
you mean you've done it?
Speaker 8 (19:42):
No, But I saw a picture last night and the
fellow all right, but he opened logs that way.
Speaker 3 (19:47):
I said, all right, holy cow.
Speaker 8 (19:51):
He said we needed an idea. And then the first
time I say.
Speaker 3 (19:54):
It, Jim, why don't we do it this way? Suppose
you take my car, Daddy, just a minute, kitten. That's
mighty generous of you, Ed, But what are you going
to do? Well? I'm supposed to go to a meeting
of the realty board, and if you'll drop me off there,
one of the other men can bring me home.
Speaker 2 (20:10):
That's awfully nice of you.
Speaker 3 (20:11):
Maybe on the way back you can pick up a
locksmith with a skeleton key or something. Say that is
an idea, Ed, if you're sure it won't put you
out too much, Yes, don't be any trouble at.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
All, Daddy, won't you please listen to me?
Speaker 3 (20:24):
What is it? Kathy?
Speaker 1 (20:26):
I know how to get in the house.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
You do well? Why didn't you say so?
Speaker 1 (20:31):
You wouldn't let me?
Speaker 3 (20:34):
All right? Kathy? How can we get in.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
Through the milk hole? What where the milkman leaves the milk?
I crawled through it all the time.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
That's right, that through the milk hole. There'sn't over a
foot square.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
But I can get through, Daddy. But what our way
of like this and the other one, Jim?
Speaker 2 (20:53):
I think Ed's right if he's willing to lend us
his car.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Honey, if Kathy can get in and open the door,
we won't have to borrow his car.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
I can't, Daddy, really, I can't.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
Look as long as you're in such an all fired hurry.
I don't think I'm not grateful. I am, believe me.
But if I can help it, I just assume not
drive around in somebody else's car. Suit you so, Bud?
Have you ever seen Kathy go through the milk hole? Sure?
Speaker 8 (21:18):
I was the one who taught a howl.
Speaker 3 (21:22):
That's fine. FIRSTY wants to pick.
Speaker 8 (21:24):
Locks, and now well there wasn't anybody home, and I
was hungry.
Speaker 9 (21:28):
Father, whatever we're going to do, don't you think we
ought to do it?
Speaker 3 (21:33):
You know, it's an amazing thing. She was the one
who held everything up. Enough, Jim, do you want the
car or don't you I? Kathy? Are you sure you
could get in? Oh?
Speaker 8 (21:45):
Sure she can get in bed.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
Well okay, thanks, just the same, Ed, But we'll use
our own car. Okay, pall, I hope you know what
you're doing. We'll manage it. And thanks just the same.
See in jail. What did he mean by that?
Speaker 2 (22:02):
Well, after all, someone might think breaking into a house
is against the law.
Speaker 3 (22:06):
How can you break into your own house?
Speaker 2 (22:08):
That's what we're trying to find out.
Speaker 3 (22:10):
Isn't it Margaret? If you're not going to make sense.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
Here is daddy.
Speaker 3 (22:14):
Huh. Let's see you make like Houdini, who just to
crawl inside and open the door.
Speaker 8 (22:23):
Come on, Kathy, I'll give you a push.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
This is fun, isn't it, Mommy?
Speaker 5 (22:27):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (22:27):
Yes, great fun.
Speaker 8 (22:29):
Hold the door open, will you, Betty? Yes? Brother dear,
come on, Kathy stick your head in.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
Why have to put my arm up first?
Speaker 3 (22:36):
Bud? Are you sure it's a sinch? Dad?
Speaker 8 (22:39):
What do you see?
Speaker 1 (22:40):
Okay that I'm ready?
Speaker 8 (22:42):
Here we go. Take a deep breath, Kathy.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
Okay, Bud, you're going to hurt her.
Speaker 8 (22:49):
She's all right, mom, aren't you?
Speaker 5 (22:51):
Kathy?
Speaker 8 (22:52):
Oh well, pull yourself.
Speaker 3 (22:55):
Through our Kathy, Bud? Pull her out?
Speaker 8 (23:02):
Why can't I push her in?
Speaker 3 (23:03):
Pull her out? We'll have you out in two seconds. Kathy, jeez,
there's nothing to worry about, honey.
Speaker 8 (23:19):
Kathy, put your stomach in.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
I said she was getting too fat.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
You stay out of this, Kathy. See if you can't
wiggle your shoulders, I can't wiggle you and your bright ideas.
Speaker 8 (23:39):
Oh gosh, Dad, she didn't have any trouble last year?
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Oh you mean she hasn't tried it since last year.
Speaker 8 (23:48):
I don't think so. But the hall hasn't gotten any smaller.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
But holy idiotic, Jim, you've got to do something.
Speaker 3 (24:01):
Take a real deep breath. I'm going to pull you off, Betty.
Tell mister Davis we'll be glad to borrow his car
and hurry.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
Yes, Jim, how can you think of borrowing a car
at a time like this?
Speaker 3 (24:16):
Well, the way he's got her wedged in here, I'd
like to borrow a truck, Jim.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
You're not going to use the car.
Speaker 3 (24:30):
Of course, not.
Speaker 5 (24:33):
Kathy.
Speaker 3 (24:34):
I'm going to pull once more. Want me to pull two?
Speaker 5 (24:37):
Dad?
Speaker 3 (24:38):
No, I'll take care of it myself.
Speaker 8 (24:41):
Kathyay, here we go, Here she comes, Jim, you're ruining
her dress?
Speaker 3 (24:49):
Well? Would you rather I left her in there? All right?
Don't worry, kitten. One more pull and we'll have you out.
Make yourself small? Now? What got it? There? We are? Oh?
Speaker 2 (25:06):
Waiting, Joel, I got stuck.
Speaker 3 (25:16):
Now there's no use crying, Paty, it's all over.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
Mother, Jim. Her dress is ruined and my stomach hurts.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
She'll be all right.
Speaker 8 (25:26):
I still can't figure out why she didn't go through.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
Father, Mister Davis isn't there?
Speaker 3 (25:34):
You mean he's gone?
Speaker 2 (25:35):
I guess.
Speaker 3 (25:35):
So now what are we going to do? Margaret?
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Bud go in and open the back door.
Speaker 8 (25:47):
Okay, Mom, honey, what got into you?
Speaker 2 (25:51):
Be careful with the glass, Bud.
Speaker 8 (25:52):
I'm all right, Mom, I'll be out in a second.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
What were you saying, Jim? I?
Speaker 3 (25:58):
Uh, couldn't you have picked a smaller window?
Speaker 1 (26:05):
My whole dress is torn.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
I'm no angel.
Speaker 9 (26:09):
What a way to spend the day, Betty, If I
hear one more word out of you, it wasn't my fault.
Speaker 3 (26:14):
I remind whose fault it was, Dad. I'd better go
inside and call Gribble dad boy. When you hear that,
what is it Dad?
Speaker 8 (26:29):
Forgot to lock the back door.
Speaker 6 (26:55):
When it comes to coffee, ladies, only one thing means
real value, the most in flavor for your money. So
with that in mind, take home the coffee with the
most famous flavor in the world, our Maxwell House Coffee.
Then put it up to the world's greatest coffee expert,
your husband. Serve the wonderfully satisfying flavor of our Maxwell
(27:18):
House to that man of yours. When he smiles and says,
best coffee ever, you'll know that familiar blue Maxwell House
tin with the big white cup and drop is packed
with the only flavor for your family. And for value, well,
just count all the truly good cups of coffee you
get from every pound. Tomorrow. Buy coffee with the most
(27:41):
in value, in flavor, in real coffee drinking enjoyment. That's
Maxwell House Coffee, always good to the last drop. The
ladies and gentlemen, The Radio Awards Jury of the Alfred P.
Sloan Foundation has selected Father Knows Best as the commercial
(28:05):
network program making the outstanding contribution to highway safety during
nineteen fifty and has honored our sponsor, the makers of
Maxwellhouse Coffee, and our star, Robert Young, with a nineteen
fifty Sloan Award. We want to say thank you very
much to the Radio Awards Jury for this recognition. And
(28:26):
while we're talking about highway safety and its importance to
all of us, I'd like to remind you young drivers
to write for membership cards in the Robert Young Good
Drivers Club and copies of the Man to Man and
Dad to Daughter agreements. Just write to Robert Young in
care of this NBC station and they will be sent
to you, folks.
Speaker 7 (29:01):
Gainsey, the famous talking dog always says Gaines Meal. What
about gains Meal gains nourishes every inch of a dog.
Speaker 3 (29:12):
It sure does.
Speaker 7 (29:13):
Kennel and laboratory tests prove gains Meal supplies balanced nourishments
your dog needs for good health. Yet gains costs less
to feed than any other type of dog food. So folks,
get Gaines Meal, America's largest selling dog food.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
Join us again next week when we'll be back with
Father Knows Best, starring Robert Young as Jim Anderson, with
Roy Bargee and the Maxwell House Orchestra. In our cast
were June Whitley as Margaret, Rhoda Williams, Ted Donaldson, Norma
ge Neilson, Barney Phillips, Ed Begley, and Yours truly, Bill Forman.
So until next Thursday, good night and good luck from
the makers of Maxwell House, America's favorite brand of coffee,
(29:58):
always good to the last drop. Father Knows Best was
transcribed in Hollywood and written by Ed Jane. Now stay
tuned in for Dragnet, which follows immediately over most of
these stations.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
Dragnet is the story of your police force and action.
Listen on NBC
My dear, is Maxwell House the desk coffee in the
whole world.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Well, your father says so, and your father knows best.
Speaker 3 (00:16):
Yes, it's father knows best.
Speaker 4 (00:17):
Transcribed in Hollywood, Sorry, Robert Young's father. A half hour
visit with your neighbors, the Andersons, brought to you by
Maxwell House, the coffee that's bought and enjoyed by more
people than any other brand of coffee at any price.
Maxwell House always good to the last drop. Once upon
(00:50):
a time, there was a popular little jingle that went
something like this, needles and pins. Needles and pins. When
a man marries, his trouble be gimes. Well, as my
wife will probably tell you and me, that isn't always
the case, even after his children are born. A man
shouldn't figure on more than an average amount.
Speaker 3 (01:11):
Of trouble, it says here.
Speaker 4 (01:13):
But when a man like Jim Anderson makes a date
for his entire family and has to get them all
dressed and out of the house at a specific time, Brother,
that's trouble like this, Margaret, for the love of.
Speaker 2 (01:26):
Pete, I'm all finished in the kitchen.
Speaker 3 (01:28):
Deer. You should have finished two hours ago. I told
you what mister Gribbles said.
Speaker 2 (01:32):
It won't do you any good to shout, Jim. I
had to put the roast in the oven, Margaret.
Speaker 3 (01:36):
Do you realize that it's almost one o'clock? And I
promised mister.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
Gribbles was only twelve thirty.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
But if he's nice enough to invite us to the
tennis matches as his guests, hey, the least we can
do is be ready on time.
Speaker 2 (01:47):
We'll be ready on time.
Speaker 5 (01:50):
Bad.
Speaker 3 (01:51):
What is it, Bob?
Speaker 5 (01:53):
Did you see my blue sweater?
Speaker 3 (01:55):
No? I didn't see your blue sweater.
Speaker 2 (01:57):
Did you look in your top drawer, dear?
Speaker 3 (02:00):
No? Well look in it?
Speaker 2 (02:03):
Okay, Jim, there isn't anything to worry about, really, there isn't.
I'll comb my hair and put on a hand.
Speaker 3 (02:11):
I'll comb your hair less than an hour ago.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
That's right now. I'm going to comb it again. Do
you have any objections?
Speaker 3 (02:17):
I go ahead, honey, Thank you, and see if you
can't make those kids move a little faster? Will you?
And the one that's Gribble again?
Speaker 2 (02:27):
Tell him we're leaving right now?
Speaker 3 (02:28):
Oh? Sure?
Speaker 6 (02:30):
Hello?
Speaker 3 (02:31):
Jim is JP Gribble? Hello? JP?
Speaker 4 (02:33):
We would just Jim for your car, hold all of us, yad.
Speaker 3 (02:38):
Just a minute, JP, Bud your father is on the phone.
Speaker 5 (02:41):
But it isn't in the top drawer, Jim.
Speaker 3 (02:44):
I just wanted to make sure I'll be with you
a second, JP, look in the bottom drawer, I did.
Speaker 1 (02:51):
Did you look on the closet shelf.
Speaker 5 (02:53):
Hey, that's a good place, Jim.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
Just one more second, JP, honey, will you please go
upstairs here?
Speaker 2 (02:59):
I forgot to fix the time around the other.
Speaker 7 (03:01):
But mark back.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
I don't know. Hello, You're sure I'm not interfering with anything? Oh? No, uh?
What was it? JP? Jim? Will you have room for
me in your car? Of course? That's all I wanted
to know. I'll see you in a short time, I hope,
(03:25):
or we'll be leaving right away. JP. Bye, see your leader, Jim.
Thank you, JP, stuffy old dad. But if you call
me once more, so help me.
Speaker 5 (03:34):
But the closet it isn't anywhere.
Speaker 3 (03:38):
Then wear something else.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
The good thing I thought of it. We'd have had
no dinner when we got back.
Speaker 5 (03:43):
But I want to wear the gray slacks and they
go together.
Speaker 2 (03:47):
Bud, What blue sweater are you talking about?
Speaker 8 (03:50):
My blue sweater, the one Aunt Martha gave Dad for Christmas.
Speaker 3 (03:58):
This blue sweater.
Speaker 5 (03:59):
I can't find it anyplace.
Speaker 3 (04:01):
But it's my sweater and I'm wearing it. Oh, Margaret,
for the love of Heaven, will you please go up stairs.
Speaker 2 (04:12):
I'd have been ready five minutes ago if you hadn't
kept me here talking.
Speaker 3 (04:16):
Eh. I'm sorry, honey. I won't let it happen again.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
I certainly haven't held anything up. Besides, since I got
out of bed this morning.
Speaker 3 (04:28):
I don't know how Solomon ever stood it. Hi, Father,
Well don't you look pretty?
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Thank you, kind sir?
Speaker 3 (04:37):
She said, yes, sir. Is a wait a minute, is
that a new dress?
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Well it's I have to find my yellow bray.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
Fot you stay right here. Who said you could buy
a new dress?
Speaker 2 (04:49):
Well, they were.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
Having a sale.
Speaker 3 (04:51):
Hi, Daddy, you look fine, kitten, Betty, since when do
you take it upon yourself?
Speaker 1 (04:57):
Kathy, you didn't comb your hair. That's a big fib.
I certainly did comb my hair. You certainly did not.
I certainly did.
Speaker 3 (05:07):
Father.
Speaker 1 (05:07):
Her hair is all over her face. Well that's the
way I like.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
It, Kathy, go upstairs and comb your hair.
Speaker 1 (05:16):
But I just did.
Speaker 3 (05:18):
Well, go upstairs and have your mother combed for you.
She whizz.
Speaker 1 (05:22):
Everybody makes such a big fuss, and for what it's hair?
Speaker 9 (05:30):
Father, if you don't do something about that child, never mind.
Speaker 3 (05:33):
About that child, and put your hat on. I'd like
to get one of you, ready.
Speaker 1 (05:36):
Yes, father, dare?
Speaker 3 (05:39):
Oh now what is it?
Speaker 5 (05:42):
I can't find the gray slax.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
You mean my gray slax?
Speaker 5 (05:47):
I can't find them any plays.
Speaker 3 (05:50):
I'm wearing them.
Speaker 5 (05:52):
You're wearing the slacks too.
Speaker 3 (05:55):
They're mine, aren't they? Well? Sure, wait a minute, haven't
you even put your pants on? Oh?
Speaker 5 (06:02):
Good, when you're wearing.
Speaker 3 (06:06):
These, aren't your pants? Holy? Call other?
Speaker 1 (06:12):
I don't know what happened to my beret?
Speaker 3 (06:14):
Well, wear's something else? I here the whole Hello, Jim,
this is JP. JP. I'm awfully sorry, but you know
how it is with children. Mother beddy for crying out loud?
What is that? Jim? I said we'll be leaving here
in less than five minutes?
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Did you call me beddy?
Speaker 5 (06:31):
Well?
Speaker 3 (06:31):
See that you do. You don't have to worry about
a thing, JP, I can't find my beret, which one, dear,
don't forget?
Speaker 4 (06:38):
The first match starts pumptly into a clop.
Speaker 3 (06:40):
Yes, dear, ye one with a feather, Betty, would you please?
I said we're leaving in two minutes. Well say that
you don't take any long, all right, JP, we'll be
right along, bad tempored old fossil.
Speaker 1 (06:59):
I send your your bart of the cleaners. Oh, mother,
you couldn't.
Speaker 3 (07:05):
Don't tell her she couldn't. She did, But but how
many times have you been told?
Speaker 8 (07:11):
That was pretty quick? Conden, I need bother to take
my shoes off when I put my pants on.
Speaker 3 (07:19):
You're a genius. Ah, go on, father?
Speaker 2 (07:25):
What am I going to do about what?
Speaker 1 (07:27):
I can't go without a hair?
Speaker 3 (07:29):
Well? That isn't the only hat you own, is it?
Speaker 1 (07:31):
You just don't understand.
Speaker 9 (07:33):
Margaret Diddy, come up here and put on your brown straw.
Speaker 1 (07:37):
See that's an idea.
Speaker 9 (07:39):
I'll be right there, mother, Margaret, we'll be right down.
Speaker 3 (07:44):
Jim, Oh my aching back.
Speaker 8 (07:48):
Well, what are we waiting for?
Speaker 3 (07:51):
But bend over and pick up the quah? No, I'd
better not that. Not fut never mind, son, it was
just an idea.
Speaker 8 (08:08):
I didn't see anything to pick up.
Speaker 3 (08:09):
But let's forget the whole thing.
Speaker 9 (08:12):
Day.
Speaker 1 (08:13):
Do I look better? Now?
Speaker 3 (08:14):
You look fine, kitten? Where's your mother?
Speaker 1 (08:16):
She'll be down in the second. She's helping Betty find
her gloves.
Speaker 3 (08:20):
She left them right here, Margaret. Betty's gloves are on
the whole table.
Speaker 1 (08:24):
Those aren't the.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Right one, Dear, I need the one to.
Speaker 1 (08:28):
Go with my brown straw.
Speaker 3 (08:30):
It isn't possible. The whole thing is just a bad dream.
Speaker 1 (08:35):
Why does she need gloves anyway?
Speaker 2 (08:37):
It isn't cold, boy.
Speaker 8 (08:38):
Are you dumb? Girls don't wear gloves to keep warm?
Speaker 1 (08:42):
They don't, of course not.
Speaker 8 (08:44):
They warm so they won't have to wash their hands.
Speaker 1 (08:50):
Say that's an idea, But Kathy has enough silly ideas
of her own.
Speaker 3 (08:56):
She doesn't need any of yours.
Speaker 8 (08:57):
That isn't my idea. Stevie long towd me, and he's
got four sisters.
Speaker 1 (09:02):
Golly, if I had enough gloves, I could go for
a hole of year.
Speaker 3 (09:06):
Now do you see what you're starting?
Speaker 1 (09:09):
If I got him long enough, I wouldn't have to
wash anything.
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Hark, I'm coming jee.
Speaker 3 (09:17):
What's keeping Betty now?
Speaker 2 (09:18):
Not a thing, dear. She'll be down as soon as
she changes her shoes.
Speaker 3 (09:21):
Her shoes? What was wrong with the shoes she had on?
Speaker 2 (09:24):
They didn't go with her hat and gloves?
Speaker 1 (09:27):
Mommy, may I have a pair of gloves.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
We'll see.
Speaker 3 (09:30):
Dear Margaret, you know what an important client gribble is?
How can you do this to me.
Speaker 2 (09:35):
We're not doing a thing to you, dear.
Speaker 1 (09:38):
Hurry up, Betty, I can't find me down to my
brown Brian.
Speaker 2 (09:42):
Oh no, Betty, you don't have to change your dress.
Speaker 1 (09:47):
I already did.
Speaker 3 (09:49):
If Gribbel wants to know why we're late, I'll just
tell him the Andersons don't go anywhere on time. We
have to worry about gloves and shoes and hats.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Well, you certainly didn't want Betty to go out with
excess streets that didn't match, did you.
Speaker 3 (10:02):
Of course not. They've probably have thrown the whole bunch
of us in jail.
Speaker 1 (10:08):
What, Kathy another joke?
Speaker 3 (10:11):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (10:15):
I don't get it, Betty. I'm right here, father.
Speaker 3 (10:21):
I don't believe that. Jim.
Speaker 2 (10:23):
Let's not waste any more time.
Speaker 3 (10:25):
I just Margaret, you seem to forget I was ready
to leave an hour ago.
Speaker 2 (10:31):
Well then don't stand there, oh Margaret. I'm sure I
left one of the kitchen windows open.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
Bud, Yes, man, Bud, you stay right where you are.
But Mom said I closed all the windows. But every
time we go anywhere, we spend a half hour checking
on the windows and doors. But not this time. This
time I took care of everything personally. Well, if you're sure,
all right, Betty, Kathy, bud.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
Mommy didn't tell me about the class.
Speaker 3 (10:58):
Have all afternoon to talk about.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
Mother, Do you think these shoes?
Speaker 3 (11:02):
Those are the shoes you're going to wear, Betty, so
you'd better get used to them.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
But if chumping creepers, what are.
Speaker 8 (11:09):
You kicking about? I was figuring on wearing my blue sweater.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
It is not your blue sweater.
Speaker 8 (11:15):
Well, I wear it all the time.
Speaker 2 (11:18):
Why, Jim, you took the car out. How thoughtful?
Speaker 3 (11:21):
Oh yes, I had it all very carefully planned, except
for a few minor things like hair and yellow berets.
Speaker 8 (11:28):
And I didn't hold anybody up. I was ready a
long time ago, Jim.
Speaker 3 (11:32):
All right, everybody, let's go. It's probably just gribble. Kathy,
get away from those flowers, but I need.
Speaker 1 (11:39):
One for my hair.
Speaker 2 (11:41):
Jim, it might be important.
Speaker 3 (11:42):
Honey, I give you my word. Well, take the kids
out to the car and I'll be with you two.
Speaker 2 (11:47):
Seconds, all right, dear, come along, children, boy, I.
Speaker 8 (11:50):
Will never get started.
Speaker 1 (11:51):
Try not to be too long. Father, we're late enough now.
Speaker 3 (11:55):
If it is gribble, I've got a good mind to
tell him to take his tennis matches and his private
box and his insurance business, and hello, haven't you left yet? Well,
as a matter of fact, JP, never mind the excuses. Look,
(12:17):
would you do me a favor in the way over?
I'd love to JP. You see, we were already out
the door and stile up at Peterson Cigar Store at
Cypressoon Hill and ask Louis. I wait a minute, JP,
I'll write it down. Go ahead, JP, Peterson Cigar Store, yes,
Cypress Hill, Yes.
Speaker 4 (12:33):
Ask for Louis, yes, and tell him to give you
a box of my special cigars.
Speaker 3 (12:37):
Right? Is that all? JP? Just one more thing?
Speaker 5 (12:42):
Hurry now.
Speaker 3 (12:51):
You will bab boom. Now I'm an errand boy have
to pick up cigars first thing. You know, he'll be
asking me to babysit these grandchildren. I don't know why
I ever went into the insurance business anyway. There must
be an easier way to make a living.
Speaker 2 (13:08):
Was it anything important, dear?
Speaker 3 (13:10):
Oh? Yes, very important. We have to stop and pick
up some cigars for mister Gribble.
Speaker 2 (13:15):
Well that won't take very long, will it. Father?
Speaker 1 (13:17):
If you don't.
Speaker 3 (13:18):
Hurry off, Betty, If I hear one more word out
of you, so help me, I'll lay you across my
knee and spank you. Adah boyd Dad, and you'll be next.
Speaker 2 (13:30):
Jim. There's no point in just standing there.
Speaker 3 (13:32):
Well, there's also no point in my getting in till
I find the car keys.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
Did you lose them?
Speaker 3 (13:36):
Father, No, I didn't lose them. Well are they right
where they always are, in the same ring as the
Oh my gosh, Jim, what is it the keys? I
put them down on the telephone table, Margaret, Do you
have your keys with you? Why?
Speaker 2 (13:52):
No, dear, As long as we were all going to
beat again.
Speaker 1 (13:55):
I left mine and my other purse.
Speaker 3 (13:57):
Well, that's fine, that's just great, Daddy. No car keys,
no house keys, Daddy.
Speaker 1 (14:04):
You know what?
Speaker 3 (14:05):
What is it? Kathy?
Speaker 1 (14:06):
We're gonna be lay.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
Well?
Speaker 6 (14:24):
How anyone can make a mistake, can't they? It's just
that father sometimes seems to overdo it. Nonetheless, ladies, there
are many times when the man of the house just
can't make a mistake. For example, when it comes to
judging truly good coffee, your husband is right every time,
for he's the world's greatest coffee expert. Of course, we're
(14:46):
often rated as experts too. More families do enjoy our
Maxwell house coffee than any other brand. But when your
husband sits down to enjoy a satisfying, heartwarming cup of
your coffee, why he's the only the expert who matters.
And tomorrow, if you'll fill his cup with the rich,
hearty flavor of our Maxwell House, we're sure he'll smile
(15:09):
and say that's really delicious coffee. Yes, ma'am, that's what
he'll say. Fact is, we'll return your money if he doesn't.
You see no other coffee taste like Maxwell House, because
no other coffee is made like Maxwell House. That famous
good to the last drop flavor can come only from
a very special recipe, one that demands certain fine coffees
(15:33):
blended just so, and that recipe belongs to Maxwell House alone. Tomorrow,
then serve the world's best coffee, our Maxwell House, to
your husband. If he doesn't say that's wonderful coffee, just
send us the can an unused portion, and we'll refund
your money. Our address is right on every familiar blue tin. Yes,
(15:56):
let the coffee expert you married enjoy coffee with the
world's most famous flavor, our Maxwell House coffee, always good
to the last drop.
Speaker 4 (16:16):
A slightly illiterate philosopher once explained Einstein's theory in this matter.
If you kiss your girl for an hour, it seems
like a minute, But if you sit on a stove
for a minute, it seems.
Speaker 3 (16:27):
Like a year. That's relativity.
Speaker 4 (16:30):
Well, it's only seconds later outside the white frame house
on Maple Street, but the Andersons feel that they've been
on the hot seat much longer than that.
Speaker 2 (16:40):
Like this, Margaret, Jim, there wasn't any sense in my
taking all the things out of my large purse. And
as long as you were.
Speaker 3 (16:47):
Going to be with us, what if something happened to me?
What if I were run over?
Speaker 2 (16:50):
Dear, You'd still have your keys, wouldn't.
Speaker 3 (16:53):
You, Bettie, You spent a whole year pleading for your
own keys, but.
Speaker 9 (16:59):
You can't telling me to hurry, and I didn't have
time to switch everything.
Speaker 3 (17:03):
I'll bet you've got your lipstick.
Speaker 9 (17:05):
Well, naturally, you wouldn't want me to go out in
public practically naked, would you?
Speaker 3 (17:11):
Any luck? Bud?
Speaker 8 (17:12):
Now, if I tried the windows and they're all.
Speaker 3 (17:14):
Lot, that's fine, that's just great. The one time I
remember to lock all the windows and nobody has a key.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
You know, Dad, if I had a key, Bud, this
is not the time.
Speaker 8 (17:25):
But other fellas have keys, and if you let me
have one.
Speaker 3 (17:28):
Fifteen aren't supposed to have their own keys.
Speaker 8 (17:30):
Joe Phillips is only fifteen.
Speaker 3 (17:32):
You weren't Joe Phillips, I know, but he has.
Speaker 8 (17:34):
Keys that don't even fit anything.
Speaker 1 (17:40):
I've got a good idea. Why don't we break the window?
Speaker 3 (17:44):
I got a better idea? Why don't Jim? I was
only gonna tell it to keep still?
Speaker 1 (17:51):
Oh well, how else do we get in?
Speaker 3 (17:54):
We'll find a way somehow if you let me have
a key. But stop that, Holy cop, spend the whole
morning sitting around doing nothing matter?
Speaker 6 (18:04):
Jim?
Speaker 3 (18:05):
Something wrong? Oh no, everything's just fine. You look like
everything's just fine. What's the problem?
Speaker 1 (18:12):
Day forgot his keys?
Speaker 3 (18:14):
That's right. Blame the whole thing on me.
Speaker 2 (18:17):
Well didn't you locked out?
Speaker 6 (18:18):
Eh?
Speaker 3 (18:20):
We're supposed to pick up all Man Gribble in ten
minutes and the car keys are inside on the telephone table. Nice,
isn't it? You know? Even for you, that's quite a mess,
even for me. Well, Jim, let's face, we don't get
into trouble any more than any other family in the neighborhood. No, no, okay.
Speaker 1 (18:41):
Daddy Kathy for crying out loud, but I want.
Speaker 3 (18:45):
To tell Daddy, I've got an idea. How about having
Kathy break a window?
Speaker 8 (18:53):
Ed?
Speaker 3 (18:53):
Well, she breaks mine all the time.
Speaker 1 (18:57):
I don't mean to mister Davis.
Speaker 3 (18:59):
Dad, if there's any other way of doing it, I'd
just as soon not break any window. Well, it was
just an idea, Dad.
Speaker 1 (19:06):
Maybe we could have Cabby climbed down the chimney.
Speaker 3 (19:09):
I'll say this for you, Betty. You may not come
up with a lot of suggestions, but when you do,
there's certainly no good. What is it, Bud?
Speaker 8 (19:18):
The phone's ringing.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
Well, what do you want me to do? Crawl through
the keyhole?
Speaker 8 (19:24):
I was just telling you, Daddy.
Speaker 3 (19:26):
Kathy, please don't bother me. You know we're never going
to get in if somebody doesn't come up with an idea.
Speaker 8 (19:32):
Do you have a hairpin?
Speaker 3 (19:33):
Mom?
Speaker 2 (19:34):
I imagine, so why I can pick the law.
Speaker 3 (19:37):
Now wait a minute, Bud, it isn't very hard dead
you mean you've done it?
Speaker 8 (19:42):
No, But I saw a picture last night and the
fellow all right, but he opened logs that way.
Speaker 3 (19:47):
I said, all right, holy cow.
Speaker 8 (19:51):
He said we needed an idea. And then the first
time I say.
Speaker 3 (19:54):
It, Jim, why don't we do it this way? Suppose
you take my car, Daddy, just a minute, kitten. That's
mighty generous of you, Ed, But what are you going
to do? Well? I'm supposed to go to a meeting
of the realty board, and if you'll drop me off there,
one of the other men can bring me home.
Speaker 2 (20:10):
That's awfully nice of you.
Speaker 3 (20:11):
Maybe on the way back you can pick up a
locksmith with a skeleton key or something. Say that is
an idea, Ed, if you're sure it won't put you
out too much, Yes, don't be any trouble at.
Speaker 1 (20:21):
All, Daddy, won't you please listen to me?
Speaker 3 (20:24):
What is it? Kathy?
Speaker 1 (20:26):
I know how to get in the house.
Speaker 3 (20:28):
You do well? Why didn't you say so?
Speaker 1 (20:31):
You wouldn't let me?
Speaker 3 (20:34):
All right? Kathy? How can we get in.
Speaker 1 (20:36):
Through the milk hole? What where the milkman leaves the milk?
I crawled through it all the time.
Speaker 3 (20:43):
That's right, that through the milk hole. There'sn't over a
foot square.
Speaker 1 (20:48):
But I can get through, Daddy. But what our way
of like this and the other one, Jim?
Speaker 2 (20:53):
I think Ed's right if he's willing to lend us
his car.
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Honey, if Kathy can get in and open the door,
we won't have to borrow his car.
Speaker 1 (21:00):
I can't, Daddy, really, I can't.
Speaker 3 (21:03):
Look as long as you're in such an all fired hurry.
I don't think I'm not grateful. I am, believe me.
But if I can help it, I just assume not
drive around in somebody else's car. Suit you so, Bud?
Have you ever seen Kathy go through the milk hole? Sure?
Speaker 8 (21:18):
I was the one who taught a howl.
Speaker 3 (21:22):
That's fine. FIRSTY wants to pick.
Speaker 8 (21:24):
Locks, and now well there wasn't anybody home, and I
was hungry.
Speaker 9 (21:28):
Father, whatever we're going to do, don't you think we
ought to do it?
Speaker 3 (21:33):
You know, it's an amazing thing. She was the one
who held everything up. Enough, Jim, do you want the
car or don't you I? Kathy? Are you sure you
could get in? Oh?
Speaker 8 (21:45):
Sure she can get in bed.
Speaker 3 (21:47):
Well okay, thanks, just the same, Ed, But we'll use
our own car. Okay, pall, I hope you know what
you're doing. We'll manage it. And thanks just the same.
See in jail. What did he mean by that?
Speaker 2 (22:02):
Well, after all, someone might think breaking into a house
is against the law.
Speaker 3 (22:06):
How can you break into your own house?
Speaker 2 (22:08):
That's what we're trying to find out.
Speaker 3 (22:10):
Isn't it Margaret? If you're not going to make sense.
Speaker 1 (22:13):
Here is daddy.
Speaker 3 (22:14):
Huh. Let's see you make like Houdini, who just to
crawl inside and open the door.
Speaker 8 (22:23):
Come on, Kathy, I'll give you a push.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
This is fun, isn't it, Mommy?
Speaker 5 (22:27):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (22:27):
Yes, great fun.
Speaker 8 (22:29):
Hold the door open, will you, Betty? Yes? Brother dear,
come on, Kathy stick your head in.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
Why have to put my arm up first?
Speaker 3 (22:36):
Bud? Are you sure it's a sinch? Dad?
Speaker 8 (22:39):
What do you see?
Speaker 1 (22:40):
Okay that I'm ready?
Speaker 8 (22:42):
Here we go. Take a deep breath, Kathy.
Speaker 1 (22:44):
Okay, Bud, you're going to hurt her.
Speaker 8 (22:49):
She's all right, mom, aren't you?
Speaker 5 (22:51):
Kathy?
Speaker 8 (22:52):
Oh well, pull yourself.
Speaker 3 (22:55):
Through our Kathy, Bud? Pull her out?
Speaker 8 (23:02):
Why can't I push her in?
Speaker 3 (23:03):
Pull her out? We'll have you out in two seconds. Kathy, jeez,
there's nothing to worry about, honey.
Speaker 8 (23:19):
Kathy, put your stomach in.
Speaker 1 (23:23):
I said she was getting too fat.
Speaker 3 (23:25):
You stay out of this, Kathy. See if you can't
wiggle your shoulders, I can't wiggle you and your bright ideas.
Speaker 8 (23:39):
Oh gosh, Dad, she didn't have any trouble last year?
Speaker 3 (23:42):
Oh you mean she hasn't tried it since last year.
Speaker 8 (23:48):
I don't think so. But the hall hasn't gotten any smaller.
Speaker 2 (23:54):
But holy idiotic, Jim, you've got to do something.
Speaker 3 (24:01):
Take a real deep breath. I'm going to pull you off, Betty.
Tell mister Davis we'll be glad to borrow his car
and hurry.
Speaker 2 (24:11):
Yes, Jim, how can you think of borrowing a car
at a time like this?
Speaker 3 (24:16):
Well, the way he's got her wedged in here, I'd
like to borrow a truck, Jim.
Speaker 2 (24:21):
You're not going to use the car.
Speaker 3 (24:30):
Of course, not.
Speaker 5 (24:33):
Kathy.
Speaker 3 (24:34):
I'm going to pull once more. Want me to pull two?
Speaker 5 (24:37):
Dad?
Speaker 3 (24:38):
No, I'll take care of it myself.
Speaker 8 (24:41):
Kathyay, here we go, Here she comes, Jim, you're ruining
her dress?
Speaker 3 (24:49):
Well? Would you rather I left her in there? All right?
Don't worry, kitten. One more pull and we'll have you out.
Make yourself small? Now? What got it? There? We are? Oh?
Speaker 2 (25:06):
Waiting, Joel, I got stuck.
Speaker 3 (25:16):
Now there's no use crying, Paty, it's all over.
Speaker 2 (25:19):
Mother, Jim. Her dress is ruined and my stomach hurts.
Speaker 3 (25:25):
She'll be all right.
Speaker 8 (25:26):
I still can't figure out why she didn't go through.
Speaker 1 (25:31):
Father, Mister Davis isn't there?
Speaker 3 (25:34):
You mean he's gone?
Speaker 2 (25:35):
I guess.
Speaker 3 (25:35):
So now what are we going to do? Margaret?
Speaker 2 (25:44):
Bud go in and open the back door.
Speaker 8 (25:47):
Okay, Mom, honey, what got into you?
Speaker 2 (25:51):
Be careful with the glass, Bud.
Speaker 8 (25:52):
I'm all right, Mom, I'll be out in a second.
Speaker 2 (25:55):
What were you saying, Jim? I?
Speaker 3 (25:58):
Uh, couldn't you have picked a smaller window?
Speaker 1 (26:05):
My whole dress is torn.
Speaker 2 (26:07):
I'm no angel.
Speaker 9 (26:09):
What a way to spend the day, Betty, If I
hear one more word out of you, it wasn't my fault.
Speaker 3 (26:14):
I remind whose fault it was, Dad. I'd better go
inside and call Gribble dad boy. When you hear that,
what is it Dad?
Speaker 8 (26:29):
Forgot to lock the back door.
Speaker 6 (26:55):
When it comes to coffee, ladies, only one thing means
real value, the most in flavor for your money. So
with that in mind, take home the coffee with the
most famous flavor in the world, our Maxwell House Coffee.
Then put it up to the world's greatest coffee expert,
your husband. Serve the wonderfully satisfying flavor of our Maxwell
(27:18):
House to that man of yours. When he smiles and says,
best coffee ever, you'll know that familiar blue Maxwell House
tin with the big white cup and drop is packed
with the only flavor for your family. And for value, well,
just count all the truly good cups of coffee you
get from every pound. Tomorrow. Buy coffee with the most
(27:41):
in value, in flavor, in real coffee drinking enjoyment. That's
Maxwell House Coffee, always good to the last drop. The
ladies and gentlemen, The Radio Awards Jury of the Alfred P.
Sloan Foundation has selected Father Knows Best as the commercial
(28:05):
network program making the outstanding contribution to highway safety during
nineteen fifty and has honored our sponsor, the makers of
Maxwellhouse Coffee, and our star, Robert Young, with a nineteen
fifty Sloan Award. We want to say thank you very
much to the Radio Awards Jury for this recognition. And
(28:26):
while we're talking about highway safety and its importance to
all of us, I'd like to remind you young drivers
to write for membership cards in the Robert Young Good
Drivers Club and copies of the Man to Man and
Dad to Daughter agreements. Just write to Robert Young in
care of this NBC station and they will be sent
to you, folks.
Speaker 7 (29:01):
Gainsey, the famous talking dog always says Gaines Meal. What
about gains Meal gains nourishes every inch of a dog.
Speaker 3 (29:12):
It sure does.
Speaker 7 (29:13):
Kennel and laboratory tests prove gains Meal supplies balanced nourishments
your dog needs for good health. Yet gains costs less
to feed than any other type of dog food. So folks,
get Gaines Meal, America's largest selling dog food.
Speaker 4 (29:34):
Join us again next week when we'll be back with
Father Knows Best, starring Robert Young as Jim Anderson, with
Roy Bargee and the Maxwell House Orchestra. In our cast
were June Whitley as Margaret, Rhoda Williams, Ted Donaldson, Norma
ge Neilson, Barney Phillips, Ed Begley, and Yours truly, Bill Forman.
So until next Thursday, good night and good luck from
the makers of Maxwell House, America's favorite brand of coffee,
(29:58):
always good to the last drop. Father Knows Best was
transcribed in Hollywood and written by Ed Jane. Now stay
tuned in for Dragnet, which follows immediately over most of
these stations.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
Dragnet is the story of your police force and action.
Listen on NBC
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Special Summer Offer: Exclusively on Apple Podcasts, try our Dateline Premium subscription completely free for one month! With Dateline Premium, you get every episode ad-free plus exclusive bonus content.
On Purpose with Jay Shetty
I’m Jay Shetty host of On Purpose the worlds #1 Mental Health podcast and I’m so grateful you found us. I started this podcast 5 years ago to invite you into conversations and workshops that are designed to help make you happier, healthier and more healed. I believe that when you (yes you) feel seen, heard and understood you’re able to deal with relationship struggles, work challenges and life’s ups and downs with more ease and grace. I interview experts, celebrities, thought leaders and athletes so that we can grow our mindset, build better habits and uncover a side of them we’ve never seen before. New episodes every Monday and Friday. Your support means the world to me and I don’t take it for granted — click the follow button and leave a review to help us spread the love with On Purpose. I can’t wait for you to listen to your first or 500th episode!