August 9, 2025 • 29 mins
A sitcom that portrays the everyday life of a typical American family, focusing on the father's guidance and wisdom. The show combines humor with moral lessons.
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Mother, Is Maxwell House really the only coffee in.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
The world, Well, your father says so, and your father
knows best.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Yes, it's father knows best. Transcribed in Hollywood, starring Robert
Young's father. A half hour visit with your neighbors. The
Anderson's brought to you by Maxwell House, the coffee that's
bought and enjoyed by more people than any other brand
of coffee at any price. Maxwell House always good to
the last drop, and all.
Speaker 4 (00:53):
Us other chillen.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
When the supper things is done, we set around the
kitchen fire and has the mostest fun into the witch
tales that Annie tells about and the goblin.
Speaker 4 (01:03):
That gets you if you don't watch out.
Speaker 3 (01:07):
It's Halloween and Springfield and the white frame house on
Maple Street looks dark and deserted.
Speaker 4 (01:12):
Maybe that's because it is dark and deserted.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
The Andersons you see are heading home after a week
in in the country with their friends, the Palmers, and
at the moment we find them, that is, their car
is parked on a muddy and rain spattered road between
How am I.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
Supposed to know where they are? They don't even know themselves?
Like this? What does the sign say, Bud I don't know.
It's dark out here. Well light a match?
Speaker 5 (01:39):
Oh okay, I don't know what's the matter with that boy.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
He doesn't have enough sense to come in out of
the rain.
Speaker 6 (01:46):
If he did, he couldn't read the sign, could he do?
Speaker 4 (01:49):
Hmm? Can you see it now, Bud? Yeah? Well what
does it say? No trespassing? That's a great help, all right,
come on back, okay, daddy, what is it? Kathy?
Speaker 1 (02:06):
My theater?
Speaker 4 (02:07):
Cold? Well?
Speaker 5 (02:09):
Put them in your pocket, father, And that wasn't very nuts.
She's done nothing but complain for the last three hours.
She's hungry, she's sleepy, she's tired, she's cold.
Speaker 4 (02:20):
Father, Yes, Betty, so am I fine, I'll make a
note of it.
Speaker 5 (02:28):
Boy, it sure wet out here. Well get in and
close the door. Don't just stand there shove over?
Speaker 7 (02:33):
Will you're Betty, but you're getting me all whack your
poor thing. How would you like to get out every
two minutes and look at a dopey sign?
Speaker 4 (02:40):
But stop complaining and shut the door.
Speaker 7 (02:43):
I'm not complaining dead, but just because she gets a
few drops of water on, shut the door.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
Holy cow. Once we get back on the main road,
I'll have you home in thirty minutes.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
That's what you said two hours ago.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
Well, I'm certainly not going to change my mind now.
Speaker 5 (03:01):
If you hadn't spent so much time lollygagging with the
Palmer boy, we wouldn't have had to take this short
cut shortcut?
Speaker 4 (03:07):
Ha What was that? Oh? H nothing, Dad, I was
just thinking, well.
Speaker 5 (03:13):
Stop thinking out loud. This is a very good shortcut,
if I can ever find it.
Speaker 6 (03:21):
Oh dear, it's too bad this had to happen. It
was such a nice weekend, wasn't it, Jim.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Yes, the Palmers are wonderful people, aren't they.
Speaker 5 (03:30):
Oh they're nice people, all right. But Will didn't have
to knock himself out that way.
Speaker 6 (03:35):
She was merely trying to be pleasant.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
He scared me.
Speaker 6 (03:40):
You didn't, really, Kathy. He was just having.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Fun, some fun you that hotcha?
Speaker 5 (03:49):
Well, let's face it, Margaret, just because it's Halloween. He
didn't have to have ghosts popping out of the closet
every time he opened the door.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
And I was scared.
Speaker 5 (03:57):
I don't like ghost, Oh, Kathy, for the eight million time,
there's no such thing as a ghost.
Speaker 4 (04:03):
There isn't no Will.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
You just say he had him in all.
Speaker 4 (04:07):
The closets He had sheets in all the closets.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
You mean they weren't real live ghosts.
Speaker 4 (04:12):
There is no such thing as a real live ghost.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
How about a real dead ghost, Betty.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
You'll keep out of this.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
I was only trying to help.
Speaker 5 (04:23):
You've helped quite enough. Thank you. You and Marshall the
mechanical wizard.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
Now what did we do?
Speaker 5 (04:29):
The gas gauge doesn't work, the radio doesn't work.
Speaker 4 (04:32):
Nothing works.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
Marshall said it just needed a fuse.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
Marshall said he works one week at a filling station
and that makes him an expert mechanic.
Speaker 6 (04:41):
Jim, how do you suppose Will did that thing with
the bridge table?
Speaker 4 (04:45):
What thing? Well?
Speaker 6 (04:47):
Where the bridge table floated in the air? It was
very clever.
Speaker 4 (04:51):
I don't know. I suppose he had wires hooked on
it or something.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
I didn't see any wires. There's another sign where over there?
Speaker 4 (04:59):
Well, maybe now we'll find out where we are. But
oh no, Dad, do I have to go out again?
A little rain isn't going to hurt you. But I'm
wet clear through now. Then you can't get any wetter.
Speaker 7 (05:17):
Go ahead, Bud, Holy cow, what they need in this
family is a seeing eye.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Duck Daddy, Now what if there aren't any ghosts. Why
do people say.
Speaker 5 (05:31):
There are because they don't have anything better to talk about.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
I know you don't believe in those things, Jim, But
there was a chair in my grandmother William's.
Speaker 5 (05:39):
Bedroom and it rocked back and forth and back and forth.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
It certainly did.
Speaker 5 (05:44):
You've told me about it eight thousand times, and there's
still a logical explanation for it.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
Maybe the termites were pacing up and down.
Speaker 6 (05:54):
Betty, that isn't funny.
Speaker 5 (05:56):
The floor was probably crooked, or the chair was standing
in a draft, have been anything, but it was not
being rocked by a ghost.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
I'm scared, Dad.
Speaker 4 (06:07):
What's the matter? Bud? Hey? Dad, you know what?
Speaker 5 (06:10):
Don't stand out there in the rain. Get inside, Okay, moveover,
will you?
Speaker 4 (06:14):
Betty?
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Oh you're a past well.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Ben what what did you find out? Hmmm? Oh?
Speaker 7 (06:24):
Well remember the sign that said Bensonville twelve miles and
you said, now.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
You knew where you were? What about it? That's it?
Speaker 6 (06:36):
What Jim?
Speaker 4 (06:39):
You mean? It's the same sign.
Speaker 7 (06:41):
Sure, On the bottom it says Blossom loves Rocky with
a skull and corresponds Bensonville.
Speaker 6 (06:49):
Father, we were.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
Here two hours ago.
Speaker 5 (06:51):
Jim Anderson Margaret, it was an honest mistake when I
took the right turn.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
I guess I should have taken the left, that's all
Kathy said.
Speaker 6 (06:59):
We should have taken the left.
Speaker 4 (07:00):
Since when is a nine year old child no more
about roads than I do?
Speaker 6 (07:04):
Now?
Speaker 5 (07:09):
Whoa if you're going to be insulting about it, if
you'd only stop someone and.
Speaker 4 (07:14):
Ask why cool? We haven't seen a soul since we
left man Steel and that was three hours ago. Now
what's wrong with a full motor? Maybe you flooded it? Dad?
Pull way out on the chalk bud. Would you like
to drive? Okay? No, stay right.
Speaker 5 (07:33):
I was driving cars before you were born and I
can drive rings around you right now?
Speaker 4 (07:37):
Well? Sure, father?
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Is the switch arm?
Speaker 4 (07:39):
The switch is on?
Speaker 5 (07:41):
Contact Roger will ko wahoo.
Speaker 4 (07:43):
Only it won't start. Now are you happy?
Speaker 6 (07:47):
Jim? You're losing your temper.
Speaker 4 (07:48):
I'm not losing my temper.
Speaker 5 (07:50):
I'm calm, I'm cool, and I'd like to take Marshall
Palmer and stuff him down the nearest.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
Well, why blame it on Marshall? He was only trying
to help the two of.
Speaker 4 (07:59):
You fussed around with this car for two hours and
you've wrecked it. Does it take two hours to put
gas in the car. Gas.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
You didn't say to put gas in the car. What, Well,
we just checked the tires and polished the crowman. You
didn't say to put gas in it.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
Oh, Margaret, No.
Speaker 6 (08:25):
Betty, how could you have done a thing like that?
Speaker 1 (08:29):
Well, I didn't know he wanted us to.
Speaker 4 (08:30):
Get gas, Margaret. I've been a good husband and a
good father, but so help me. Oh, Daddy, stop it,
Please stop choking your father. Please.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
But I saw it, Mommy. It was big and white
and that big long way mother.
Speaker 6 (08:54):
All right, Jim, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (08:58):
I think she's been taking lessons from Strangler Lewis. I
don't see any ghosts.
Speaker 8 (09:05):
It was over there, but he had three heads and
long white beard and I saw.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
It out the window.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
There is something.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
It's the ghost, oh, Dad, now in it.
Speaker 7 (09:19):
But I don't think it's a ghost. But I saw something.
I don't see any Oh, yes, father, Jim. There's nothing
to get upset about, Margaret.
Speaker 4 (09:29):
It's probably just a billboard or a sign or something.
It's a howl.
Speaker 7 (09:35):
Uh sure, now I can see it. It's a two
story house and it's got pigeons on the roof.
Speaker 4 (09:41):
Ghosts with three heads.
Speaker 5 (09:45):
All that excitement about a farmhouse and a few fluttering pigeons.
Speaker 4 (09:49):
You ought to be ashamed of yourselves, all of you.
Speaker 6 (09:53):
Jim, where are you going?
Speaker 4 (09:54):
I'm going to see if I can't wake somebody up.
I got to borrow, so yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Jim, don't stay away too long. Please, I'll be right back.
But maybe you ought to go with your father?
Speaker 4 (10:03):
What for?
Speaker 6 (10:04):
Well, it's very dark out there, and he might not
be able to find the way.
Speaker 4 (10:08):
I don't know the way any better than he does.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
But why don't you stop arguing?
Speaker 7 (10:16):
I'm not arguing, and I don't see you jumping out
in the rain.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Of course not. Girls don't do things like that?
Speaker 4 (10:23):
Why not?
Speaker 1 (10:24):
They just don't, that's why not?
Speaker 4 (10:27):
Boy? Is that a racket? I go first. I'm a girl.
I get this. I'm a girl who takes care of
the men girls.
Speaker 6 (10:41):
But this is hardly the time for a battle of
the sexes.
Speaker 7 (10:44):
I wasn't fighting, But good gravy.
Speaker 6 (10:47):
He is everything, all right, dear honey.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
It's a house, all right, but it isn't exactly what
we figured. It's.
Speaker 5 (10:52):
Well, it's a sort of an empty caretaker's cottage.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
What's an empty caretaker? It's a cottage dope, and it's empty.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
Oh, Jim, why would a farm have a caretaker's cottage?
Speaker 4 (11:09):
Well, that's what I was saying.
Speaker 5 (11:10):
It isn't exactly a farm, it's a well, just figure,
it's like anything else, that's all, Jim.
Speaker 6 (11:17):
What is it?
Speaker 4 (11:18):
Well, it's a the Pleasant View cemetery.
Speaker 3 (11:21):
Oh well, on Halloween night most of us won't be
(11:45):
in quite such a fix. Instead, the pumpkins will go
on the table when the children come in from their
chili rounds, eager for the cookies and doughnuts and fresh
sweet cider. And you know who else will be there
to drink a cup or two of steaming coffee. The
world's greatest coffee expert. Yes, ma'am, that number one expert
will be on hand because he's your husband. Now, we
(12:09):
could say we're the experts. Our Maxwell House coffee is
America's favorite brand, but we know the final judge is
that man of yours. And if you'll pour him a
cup of Maxwell House, we're mighty sure he'll say best coffee.
Speaker 4 (12:23):
I ever tasted.
Speaker 3 (12:25):
In fact, if he doesn't, we'll give you your money back.
You see, we know there's no coffee taste like Maxwell
House because no coffee's made like Maxwell House. We're proud
as can be that wonderful, good to the last drop flavor.
So we'd like you to buy a pound and start
serving it to that husband of yours.
Speaker 4 (12:44):
And if he doesn't.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
Say it's the coffee for him, why you send us
the can an unused portion, and we'll gladly refund the
price you paid. Our address is right on the front
of that familiar blue tin. Find out just how much
the world's greatest coffee expert your husband enjoys Maxwell House coffee,
always good to.
Speaker 4 (13:05):
The last drop.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
A few chill moments have come and gone, and we
find the Andersen's brave little band huddled on the porch
of the caretaker's cottage. The rain keeps pouring down on
the battered roof, and in the eaves pigeons flap their
restive wings. Or is it a belfry or are they
bats well? Anyway, the Andersons aren't worried, not in the least.
Chins up, shoulders back, they march fearlessly into whatever awaits them.
Speaker 6 (13:39):
Like this, I don't want to go in, you, caddy.
There's nothing to be afraid of.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
I don't care, I don't.
Speaker 4 (13:47):
Want to go in. I would you rather stay out
here on the porch all night and freeze to death? Ah?
Speaker 1 (13:52):
I'm scared, Tappy.
Speaker 5 (13:54):
I don't know what's gotten into you. This isn't just
a cemetery. It's a monument of which we should all
be proud.
Speaker 4 (14:02):
Those are the graves of Civil War heroes, men who
died for their country.
Speaker 5 (14:07):
Father, What were you saying, dear, Let's see if we
can get inside, dad, any luck, bud No.
Speaker 7 (14:19):
I tried the windows on the ground floor and they're
all locked. Oh fine, I found a shovel out and back.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
Though. That's nice. If we can't dig our way in,
at least it'll make a pleasant souvenir of the evening,
won't it. Well.
Speaker 7 (14:33):
I just thought if there's a shovel around, maybe that
means somebody lives here.
Speaker 4 (14:37):
Thank you, Sam Spade.
Speaker 7 (14:43):
Say that's a good one, Sam Spade, because I've found
his shovel.
Speaker 6 (14:50):
Can get it ready, I got it, and you can
have it.
Speaker 4 (14:54):
It's the matter with her.
Speaker 6 (14:56):
I want to go.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
We can't go home, Caddy.
Speaker 5 (14:59):
There isn't any gas in the car, and I'm not
walking twelve miles in the rain to get any either.
Speaker 6 (15:04):
Jim we can't just stand here all night.
Speaker 5 (15:07):
I have no intention of standing here all night. First,
let's see if you can't, Jim.
Speaker 4 (15:14):
It's just the door opening, honey, that's all. Who opened it?
Speaker 1 (15:21):
I want to go home.
Speaker 4 (15:24):
I hear one more peep out of you? So help me, Jim?
What happened? I don't know? He was right? But mother?
You want me? Dad? How'd you get down there? I
don't know. I guess I fell off the ports. Who
opened the door? Dan? I don't I know? But it's open,
so we don't have to worry about that anymore.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
It used to be open.
Speaker 4 (15:51):
That's funny. It's lart. Huh No, I just like to
rattle door knobs.
Speaker 7 (16:00):
I'm good at the open one minute and locked the
next minute.
Speaker 4 (16:03):
The wind, that's all it is. The wind blew it shut?
Speaker 1 (16:06):
Who blew it open?
Speaker 4 (16:09):
That? He stopped asking silly questions?
Speaker 1 (16:11):
What's silly about that, Bud?
Speaker 4 (16:14):
Let's see if Jim, father, never mind, Bud, it's open again?
Holy how all right? Everybody, Let's get inside before the
darn thing changes its mind again.
Speaker 6 (16:32):
Jim, this is a haunted house, Margaret.
Speaker 1 (16:35):
I don't want to go into the haunted house.
Speaker 4 (16:37):
Yes, he stopped being ridiculous. There's no such thing as
a haunted house.
Speaker 6 (16:41):
Jim. I know you don't believe in ghosts and haunted houses.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
Margaret, you don't either, No sensible person does.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
Of course, Dear, But why did the bridge table float
in the air at the Palmers?
Speaker 5 (16:54):
It was a trick, Margaret, just like all the other
stupid things Will Palmer did tapping on the floor or
in weird voices.
Speaker 4 (17:01):
You saw how he.
Speaker 6 (17:01):
Did those, but he didn't explain about the table.
Speaker 5 (17:05):
He forgot, that's all. And if you don't mind, I
just as soon forget too. Let's go inside, all right,
can't be.
Speaker 6 (17:14):
I'm only a little girl. I'm only nine years old. Angel,
Nothing's going.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
To hurt you. Uh, turn on the lights, bud, mother?
Speaker 1 (17:28):
Is it all right if I just wait in the car.
Speaker 4 (17:31):
You're staying right here with us, how about it? But
nothing happens. Well, we'll get a light somehow. Now, what's
the matter?
Speaker 1 (17:44):
I just roughed in with spider web?
Speaker 4 (17:46):
EWW? Will please stop complaining and close the door?
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Jumping creepers.
Speaker 8 (17:54):
All I wanted to do was get into the sixth grade.
Speaker 6 (18:07):
Cassy dead.
Speaker 4 (18:08):
There's an oor lamp over here. Fine, now we're getting somewhere.
But there isn't any oil in it. But yes, that
see what else you can find? It isn't any good,
isn't any good for what? Just never mind? Oh gosh,
(18:29):
I was only trying to bother no.
Speaker 1 (18:31):
Self grad.
Speaker 4 (18:35):
Stupid door. But don't look at me, Dad, I wasn't
any place near it. I know you weren't. I was really. Oh,
here's what it is. It's just a loose screw.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
I knew there was a screw loose sunplace.
Speaker 5 (18:51):
You see this, Margaret. The latch is unfastened. When the
wind blows, the latch slides over and the door opens.
Speaker 4 (18:56):
Why couldn't you open it before? Because the latch gets
hung up when the more bang shut and stop bothering me.
There's nothing mysterious about it.
Speaker 8 (19:05):
I'll be happy to finish the fourth grade.
Speaker 6 (19:09):
Jim.
Speaker 4 (19:09):
It's very cold in here, yeah, kind of clamming.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
Wouldn't it be warmer if we all just sat in
the car.
Speaker 5 (19:17):
We'll get a fire started in here and that'll take
care of everything. Jim, Honey, there's nothing in here that
can hurt anybody. A nice friendly fire in the fireplace,
it'll make all.
Speaker 4 (19:26):
The difference in the world. How about getting some wood, Bud.
Here's a whole pile of newspapers.
Speaker 7 (19:31):
Good, hey, you know who's gonna run for president?
Speaker 4 (19:34):
Cool edge?
Speaker 5 (19:39):
But let's get the fire started and stop with the jokes.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
What jokes?
Speaker 6 (19:44):
Just oh, get some wood, Jim.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
I know it isn't anything to be worried about, but
that door gives me the creeps.
Speaker 5 (19:57):
Well i'll fix that. Get this chair wedged under the
door knob, and there we are. Now i'd like to
see it open. Come on, Bud, let's get going with
the wood.
Speaker 4 (20:09):
Where do I get wood? I don't care where you
get it, just get it. Good grief. Well that's a novelty, Daddy, Kathy,
you know I can't stand that. What stop whining?
Speaker 1 (20:24):
I was whining, Daddy.
Speaker 4 (20:26):
Hand me some of that newspaper, Betty? Will you please?
Speaker 1 (20:28):
What a time to read?
Speaker 4 (20:33):
Betty?
Speaker 6 (20:33):
Help your father build a fire?
Speaker 8 (20:35):
Okay, Kathy, yes, Daddy, you're whining again.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
I didn't even make a sound. Here's the paper, father,
Thank you.
Speaker 4 (20:45):
We'll have some light in here in just about two seconds.
How's this for a dad? Fine, Bud, there we are.
That's a little better, isn't it. Let's have the wood, Bud. Mother, Jim,
it's an owl, Margaret, that's all. It is, just an owl.
Speaker 1 (21:05):
I don't like owls.
Speaker 4 (21:07):
You don't like anything.
Speaker 6 (21:10):
And what is it?
Speaker 4 (21:11):
Smoke doesn't seem to be going up the chimney especially,
must have their nests up there. Want me to open
a window? Dead, Yeah, I guess I think, father, Jim.
(21:32):
The chair it's gold. I want to go in just
a minute. There.
Speaker 5 (21:35):
There must be a little logical explanation. Chairs don't just
walk off by themselves, do they?
Speaker 7 (21:42):
But this one didn't? You just put it in the fireplace. Well,
you said you didn't care.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Where I got the wood.
Speaker 6 (21:56):
The smoke is getting awful.
Speaker 4 (21:57):
But opened the window at the top of the stairs
and see if we can't get a little cross ventilation
in here. Bud do this? Bud do?
Speaker 7 (22:04):
That sounds like the only name you ever heard of
was fun.
Speaker 4 (22:10):
I said, I have to open the window. Hey, I
want to go home. What is it? It was a cab.
I guess I stepped on its tail. Well, stop fooling
around and open the window.
Speaker 8 (22:26):
Who father, Daddy, I have a wonderful ice here.
Speaker 4 (22:33):
Let's go. Jim.
Speaker 5 (22:35):
It's a dog, Margaret, that's all, just a dog howling
at the moon, dog's.
Speaker 1 (22:40):
Howl when somebody dies.
Speaker 4 (22:43):
Now there's a pleasant bit of internt.
Speaker 5 (22:48):
I'm only a little girl, please, I'm not having a
bad enough time people jumping every time a dog howls
or an owl hoops or a door squeaks. But why
(23:16):
do you have to sneak up in back of people
like that?
Speaker 4 (23:19):
I didn't sneak up in back of you. You certainly did, Jim.
What's that a cow? Just a plain ordinary cow. What's
a cow doing up this time of night looking for
another cow?
Speaker 6 (23:36):
It's rolls, Jim. All those peculiar noises, they.
Speaker 4 (23:45):
Aren't peculiar noises.
Speaker 5 (23:46):
We're out in the country and they're just plain ordinary noises.
Speaker 4 (23:50):
But they sound so weird, father, what's the matter? We
heard something?
Speaker 5 (23:56):
You're imagining things, all of you. You heard the wind
whistling through the trees.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
It didn't sound like the wind, all right?
Speaker 5 (24:04):
What did it sound like like that?
Speaker 4 (24:09):
Oh? That's nothing. It's just a board creaking, that's all, Jim.
Speaker 6 (24:19):
We've got to get out of here.
Speaker 4 (24:20):
How where are we going to go? I don't care where.
Let's just go. I'm only nine years old, all right.
Can't we leave right now? Not that there's anything to
be afraid of. Father, it's coming closer.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
It's a big white.
Speaker 4 (24:44):
Oh boy, Jim, all right, we've got you covered. Stay
where you are. Are your folks folks? Oh, yes, we're folks.
Who are you. I'm a new caretaker, just moved in tonight,
(25:05):
and I'm not sure I like this job, jem. You see,
there wasn't anything to be afraid of. Maybe the rank now,
but I was sure scared before. You see, for a
while I figured maybe you was ghosts.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
When you buy coffee, you certainly want to get the
most in flavor for your money, and you know the
world's greatest coffee expert can help you find it. Yes, ma'am,
Just at a steaming cup of Maxwell House coffee in
front of your husband. He's the night number one expert.
Watch him smile at the first sip. Listen to him
say best coffee I ever tasted. Right then you'll know
(26:09):
you've found the flavor. You'll know that Maxwell House is
your coffee. Buy bring home a pound of Maxwell House tomorrow.
Speaker 4 (26:17):
See how much your husband enjoys every cupful.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
And count all the truly good cups of coffee you
get from just one of those familiar blue tins. We
think you'll be convinced that Maxwell House Coffee gives you
the most for your money, because it's always good to
the last drop.
Speaker 4 (26:42):
The horrible night is over.
Speaker 3 (26:43):
At last, the Anderson's are home, safe and happy, and
as they dig into their breakfast cereal, Jim tells them exactly.
Speaker 5 (26:50):
How foolish they've been like this. I've never been so
ashamed of anyone in my entire life. Why you acted
as though we were living in the Middle Ages.
Speaker 4 (27:00):
I wasn't scared, Dad, You certainly were. I certainly wasn't.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
You were just as scared as anybody, wasn't he, Kathy,
He wasn't as scared.
Speaker 6 (27:09):
As I was.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
I was real scared of what.
Speaker 4 (27:13):
Everything had a logical explanation, didn't it. Jim? Hello, Margaret,
you finally decided to come to the party. Huh. You
haven't said a word since we sat.
Speaker 6 (27:22):
Down at the table. Jim, there was a phone call
before you got up. Oh, who wasn't Will Palmer? He
said he hadn't been able to sleep a wink all night.
Speaker 4 (27:31):
Good serves him right? What do you want?
Speaker 6 (27:34):
He want you to call him?
Speaker 4 (27:35):
What for? We just saw him yesterday?
Speaker 6 (27:37):
He wants you to tell him how you did that
trick where the bridge table floats in the air.
Speaker 3 (27:44):
Oh No, tell the kids it's a hot favorite with Hoppy.
(28:05):
That's hot post wheatmeal. And if you have trouble getting
the youngsters to eat a hot cereal, just tell them
how much hop Along Cassidy loves that rich, brown, hot
post tweetmeal. Post wheatmeal is chuck full of good, solid nourishment.
It has a wonderful nut like flavor. It cooks in
just three and a half minutes. And tell the kids
it's Hoppy's favorite hot post wheatmeal. You'll see you'll all
(28:28):
agree it's the best hot cereal you ever ate. Join
us again next week when we'll be back with Father
Knows Best, starring Robert Young as Jim Anderson with Roy
Bargee on the Maxwell House Orchestra and yours truly, Bill Forman.
(28:49):
So until next Thursday, good night and good luck from
the makers of Maxwell House, America's favorite brand of coffee,
always good to the last drop, Father Knows Best, transcribed
in Hollywood and written by Ed James. Now stay tuned
in for Dragnet, which follows immediately over most of these stations.
Speaker 4 (29:18):
Robert Young again reminding you to stay tuned for Dragnet
on NBC
Mother, Is Maxwell House really the only coffee in.
Speaker 2 (00:04):
The world, Well, your father says so, and your father
knows best.
Speaker 3 (00:17):
Yes, it's father knows best. Transcribed in Hollywood, starring Robert
Young's father. A half hour visit with your neighbors. The
Anderson's brought to you by Maxwell House, the coffee that's
bought and enjoyed by more people than any other brand
of coffee at any price. Maxwell House always good to
the last drop, and all.
Speaker 4 (00:53):
Us other chillen.
Speaker 3 (00:54):
When the supper things is done, we set around the
kitchen fire and has the mostest fun into the witch
tales that Annie tells about and the goblin.
Speaker 4 (01:03):
That gets you if you don't watch out.
Speaker 3 (01:07):
It's Halloween and Springfield and the white frame house on
Maple Street looks dark and deserted.
Speaker 4 (01:12):
Maybe that's because it is dark and deserted.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
The Andersons you see are heading home after a week
in in the country with their friends, the Palmers, and
at the moment we find them, that is, their car
is parked on a muddy and rain spattered road between
How am I.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
Supposed to know where they are? They don't even know themselves?
Like this? What does the sign say, Bud I don't know.
It's dark out here. Well light a match?
Speaker 5 (01:39):
Oh okay, I don't know what's the matter with that boy.
Speaker 4 (01:43):
He doesn't have enough sense to come in out of
the rain.
Speaker 6 (01:46):
If he did, he couldn't read the sign, could he do?
Speaker 4 (01:49):
Hmm? Can you see it now, Bud? Yeah? Well what
does it say? No trespassing? That's a great help, all right,
come on back, okay, daddy, what is it? Kathy?
Speaker 1 (02:06):
My theater?
Speaker 4 (02:07):
Cold? Well?
Speaker 5 (02:09):
Put them in your pocket, father, And that wasn't very nuts.
She's done nothing but complain for the last three hours.
She's hungry, she's sleepy, she's tired, she's cold.
Speaker 4 (02:20):
Father, Yes, Betty, so am I fine, I'll make a
note of it.
Speaker 5 (02:28):
Boy, it sure wet out here. Well get in and
close the door. Don't just stand there shove over?
Speaker 7 (02:33):
Will you're Betty, but you're getting me all whack your
poor thing. How would you like to get out every
two minutes and look at a dopey sign?
Speaker 4 (02:40):
But stop complaining and shut the door.
Speaker 7 (02:43):
I'm not complaining dead, but just because she gets a
few drops of water on, shut the door.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
Holy cow. Once we get back on the main road,
I'll have you home in thirty minutes.
Speaker 1 (02:55):
That's what you said two hours ago.
Speaker 4 (02:57):
Well, I'm certainly not going to change my mind now.
Speaker 5 (03:01):
If you hadn't spent so much time lollygagging with the
Palmer boy, we wouldn't have had to take this short
cut shortcut?
Speaker 4 (03:07):
Ha What was that? Oh? H nothing, Dad, I was
just thinking, well.
Speaker 5 (03:13):
Stop thinking out loud. This is a very good shortcut,
if I can ever find it.
Speaker 6 (03:21):
Oh dear, it's too bad this had to happen. It
was such a nice weekend, wasn't it, Jim.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
Yes, the Palmers are wonderful people, aren't they.
Speaker 5 (03:30):
Oh they're nice people, all right. But Will didn't have
to knock himself out that way.
Speaker 6 (03:35):
She was merely trying to be pleasant.
Speaker 1 (03:37):
He scared me.
Speaker 6 (03:40):
You didn't, really, Kathy. He was just having.
Speaker 1 (03:42):
Fun, some fun you that hotcha?
Speaker 5 (03:49):
Well, let's face it, Margaret, just because it's Halloween. He
didn't have to have ghosts popping out of the closet
every time he opened the door.
Speaker 1 (03:56):
And I was scared.
Speaker 5 (03:57):
I don't like ghost, Oh, Kathy, for the eight million time,
there's no such thing as a ghost.
Speaker 4 (04:03):
There isn't no Will.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
You just say he had him in all.
Speaker 4 (04:07):
The closets He had sheets in all the closets.
Speaker 1 (04:10):
You mean they weren't real live ghosts.
Speaker 4 (04:12):
There is no such thing as a real live ghost.
Speaker 1 (04:16):
How about a real dead ghost, Betty.
Speaker 4 (04:20):
You'll keep out of this.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
I was only trying to help.
Speaker 5 (04:23):
You've helped quite enough. Thank you. You and Marshall the
mechanical wizard.
Speaker 1 (04:28):
Now what did we do?
Speaker 5 (04:29):
The gas gauge doesn't work, the radio doesn't work.
Speaker 4 (04:32):
Nothing works.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
Marshall said it just needed a fuse.
Speaker 4 (04:35):
Marshall said he works one week at a filling station
and that makes him an expert mechanic.
Speaker 6 (04:41):
Jim, how do you suppose Will did that thing with
the bridge table?
Speaker 4 (04:45):
What thing? Well?
Speaker 6 (04:47):
Where the bridge table floated in the air? It was
very clever.
Speaker 4 (04:51):
I don't know. I suppose he had wires hooked on
it or something.
Speaker 1 (04:54):
I didn't see any wires. There's another sign where over there?
Speaker 4 (04:59):
Well, maybe now we'll find out where we are. But
oh no, Dad, do I have to go out again?
A little rain isn't going to hurt you. But I'm
wet clear through now. Then you can't get any wetter.
Speaker 7 (05:17):
Go ahead, Bud, Holy cow, what they need in this
family is a seeing eye.
Speaker 1 (05:25):
Duck Daddy, Now what if there aren't any ghosts. Why
do people say.
Speaker 5 (05:31):
There are because they don't have anything better to talk about.
Speaker 2 (05:35):
I know you don't believe in those things, Jim, But
there was a chair in my grandmother William's.
Speaker 5 (05:39):
Bedroom and it rocked back and forth and back and forth.
Speaker 1 (05:43):
It certainly did.
Speaker 5 (05:44):
You've told me about it eight thousand times, and there's
still a logical explanation for it.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
Maybe the termites were pacing up and down.
Speaker 6 (05:54):
Betty, that isn't funny.
Speaker 5 (05:56):
The floor was probably crooked, or the chair was standing
in a draft, have been anything, but it was not
being rocked by a ghost.
Speaker 1 (06:04):
I'm scared, Dad.
Speaker 4 (06:07):
What's the matter? Bud? Hey? Dad, you know what?
Speaker 5 (06:10):
Don't stand out there in the rain. Get inside, Okay, moveover,
will you?
Speaker 4 (06:14):
Betty?
Speaker 1 (06:15):
Oh you're a past well.
Speaker 4 (06:17):
Ben what what did you find out? Hmmm? Oh?
Speaker 7 (06:24):
Well remember the sign that said Bensonville twelve miles and
you said, now.
Speaker 4 (06:29):
You knew where you were? What about it? That's it?
Speaker 6 (06:36):
What Jim?
Speaker 4 (06:39):
You mean? It's the same sign.
Speaker 7 (06:41):
Sure, On the bottom it says Blossom loves Rocky with
a skull and corresponds Bensonville.
Speaker 6 (06:49):
Father, we were.
Speaker 1 (06:50):
Here two hours ago.
Speaker 5 (06:51):
Jim Anderson Margaret, it was an honest mistake when I
took the right turn.
Speaker 4 (06:55):
I guess I should have taken the left, that's all
Kathy said.
Speaker 6 (06:59):
We should have taken the left.
Speaker 4 (07:00):
Since when is a nine year old child no more
about roads than I do?
Speaker 6 (07:04):
Now?
Speaker 5 (07:09):
Whoa if you're going to be insulting about it, if
you'd only stop someone and.
Speaker 4 (07:14):
Ask why cool? We haven't seen a soul since we
left man Steel and that was three hours ago. Now
what's wrong with a full motor? Maybe you flooded it? Dad?
Pull way out on the chalk bud. Would you like
to drive? Okay? No, stay right.
Speaker 5 (07:33):
I was driving cars before you were born and I
can drive rings around you right now?
Speaker 4 (07:37):
Well? Sure, father?
Speaker 1 (07:38):
Is the switch arm?
Speaker 4 (07:39):
The switch is on?
Speaker 5 (07:41):
Contact Roger will ko wahoo.
Speaker 4 (07:43):
Only it won't start. Now are you happy?
Speaker 6 (07:47):
Jim? You're losing your temper.
Speaker 4 (07:48):
I'm not losing my temper.
Speaker 5 (07:50):
I'm calm, I'm cool, and I'd like to take Marshall
Palmer and stuff him down the nearest.
Speaker 1 (07:55):
Well, why blame it on Marshall? He was only trying
to help the two of.
Speaker 4 (07:59):
You fussed around with this car for two hours and
you've wrecked it. Does it take two hours to put
gas in the car. Gas.
Speaker 1 (08:14):
You didn't say to put gas in the car. What, Well,
we just checked the tires and polished the crowman. You
didn't say to put gas in it.
Speaker 4 (08:23):
Oh, Margaret, No.
Speaker 6 (08:25):
Betty, how could you have done a thing like that?
Speaker 1 (08:29):
Well, I didn't know he wanted us to.
Speaker 4 (08:30):
Get gas, Margaret. I've been a good husband and a
good father, but so help me. Oh, Daddy, stop it,
Please stop choking your father. Please.
Speaker 1 (08:47):
But I saw it, Mommy. It was big and white
and that big long way mother.
Speaker 6 (08:54):
All right, Jim, I don't know.
Speaker 4 (08:58):
I think she's been taking lessons from Strangler Lewis. I
don't see any ghosts.
Speaker 8 (09:05):
It was over there, but he had three heads and
long white beard and I saw.
Speaker 1 (09:11):
It out the window.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
There is something.
Speaker 1 (09:15):
It's the ghost, oh, Dad, now in it.
Speaker 7 (09:19):
But I don't think it's a ghost. But I saw something.
I don't see any Oh, yes, father, Jim. There's nothing
to get upset about, Margaret.
Speaker 4 (09:29):
It's probably just a billboard or a sign or something.
It's a howl.
Speaker 7 (09:35):
Uh sure, now I can see it. It's a two
story house and it's got pigeons on the roof.
Speaker 4 (09:41):
Ghosts with three heads.
Speaker 5 (09:45):
All that excitement about a farmhouse and a few fluttering pigeons.
Speaker 4 (09:49):
You ought to be ashamed of yourselves, all of you.
Speaker 6 (09:53):
Jim, where are you going?
Speaker 4 (09:54):
I'm going to see if I can't wake somebody up.
I got to borrow, so yeah.
Speaker 2 (09:57):
Jim, don't stay away too long. Please, I'll be right back.
But maybe you ought to go with your father?
Speaker 4 (10:03):
What for?
Speaker 6 (10:04):
Well, it's very dark out there, and he might not
be able to find the way.
Speaker 4 (10:08):
I don't know the way any better than he does.
Speaker 1 (10:14):
But why don't you stop arguing?
Speaker 7 (10:16):
I'm not arguing, and I don't see you jumping out
in the rain.
Speaker 1 (10:20):
Of course not. Girls don't do things like that?
Speaker 4 (10:23):
Why not?
Speaker 1 (10:24):
They just don't, that's why not?
Speaker 4 (10:27):
Boy? Is that a racket? I go first. I'm a girl.
I get this. I'm a girl who takes care of
the men girls.
Speaker 6 (10:41):
But this is hardly the time for a battle of
the sexes.
Speaker 7 (10:44):
I wasn't fighting, But good gravy.
Speaker 6 (10:47):
He is everything, all right, dear honey.
Speaker 4 (10:49):
It's a house, all right, but it isn't exactly what
we figured. It's.
Speaker 5 (10:52):
Well, it's a sort of an empty caretaker's cottage.
Speaker 1 (10:56):
What's an empty caretaker? It's a cottage dope, and it's empty.
Speaker 2 (11:06):
Oh, Jim, why would a farm have a caretaker's cottage?
Speaker 4 (11:09):
Well, that's what I was saying.
Speaker 5 (11:10):
It isn't exactly a farm, it's a well, just figure,
it's like anything else, that's all, Jim.
Speaker 6 (11:17):
What is it?
Speaker 4 (11:18):
Well, it's a the Pleasant View cemetery.
Speaker 3 (11:21):
Oh well, on Halloween night most of us won't be
(11:45):
in quite such a fix. Instead, the pumpkins will go
on the table when the children come in from their
chili rounds, eager for the cookies and doughnuts and fresh
sweet cider. And you know who else will be there
to drink a cup or two of steaming coffee. The
world's greatest coffee expert. Yes, ma'am, that number one expert
will be on hand because he's your husband. Now, we
(12:09):
could say we're the experts. Our Maxwell House coffee is
America's favorite brand, but we know the final judge is
that man of yours. And if you'll pour him a
cup of Maxwell House, we're mighty sure he'll say best coffee.
Speaker 4 (12:23):
I ever tasted.
Speaker 3 (12:25):
In fact, if he doesn't, we'll give you your money back.
You see, we know there's no coffee taste like Maxwell
House because no coffee's made like Maxwell House. We're proud
as can be that wonderful, good to the last drop flavor.
So we'd like you to buy a pound and start
serving it to that husband of yours.
Speaker 4 (12:44):
And if he doesn't.
Speaker 3 (12:45):
Say it's the coffee for him, why you send us
the can an unused portion, and we'll gladly refund the
price you paid. Our address is right on the front
of that familiar blue tin. Find out just how much
the world's greatest coffee expert your husband enjoys Maxwell House coffee,
always good to.
Speaker 4 (13:05):
The last drop.
Speaker 3 (13:15):
A few chill moments have come and gone, and we
find the Andersen's brave little band huddled on the porch
of the caretaker's cottage. The rain keeps pouring down on
the battered roof, and in the eaves pigeons flap their
restive wings. Or is it a belfry or are they
bats well? Anyway, the Andersons aren't worried, not in the least.
Chins up, shoulders back, they march fearlessly into whatever awaits them.
Speaker 6 (13:39):
Like this, I don't want to go in, you, caddy.
There's nothing to be afraid of.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
I don't care, I don't.
Speaker 4 (13:47):
Want to go in. I would you rather stay out
here on the porch all night and freeze to death? Ah?
Speaker 1 (13:52):
I'm scared, Tappy.
Speaker 5 (13:54):
I don't know what's gotten into you. This isn't just
a cemetery. It's a monument of which we should all
be proud.
Speaker 4 (14:02):
Those are the graves of Civil War heroes, men who
died for their country.
Speaker 5 (14:07):
Father, What were you saying, dear, Let's see if we
can get inside, dad, any luck, bud No.
Speaker 7 (14:19):
I tried the windows on the ground floor and they're
all locked. Oh fine, I found a shovel out and back.
Speaker 4 (14:24):
Though. That's nice. If we can't dig our way in,
at least it'll make a pleasant souvenir of the evening,
won't it. Well.
Speaker 7 (14:33):
I just thought if there's a shovel around, maybe that
means somebody lives here.
Speaker 4 (14:37):
Thank you, Sam Spade.
Speaker 7 (14:43):
Say that's a good one, Sam Spade, because I've found
his shovel.
Speaker 6 (14:50):
Can get it ready, I got it, and you can
have it.
Speaker 4 (14:54):
It's the matter with her.
Speaker 6 (14:56):
I want to go.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
We can't go home, Caddy.
Speaker 5 (14:59):
There isn't any gas in the car, and I'm not
walking twelve miles in the rain to get any either.
Speaker 6 (15:04):
Jim we can't just stand here all night.
Speaker 5 (15:07):
I have no intention of standing here all night. First,
let's see if you can't, Jim.
Speaker 4 (15:14):
It's just the door opening, honey, that's all. Who opened it?
Speaker 1 (15:21):
I want to go home.
Speaker 4 (15:24):
I hear one more peep out of you? So help me, Jim?
What happened? I don't know? He was right? But mother?
You want me? Dad? How'd you get down there? I
don't know. I guess I fell off the ports. Who
opened the door? Dan? I don't I know? But it's open,
so we don't have to worry about that anymore.
Speaker 1 (15:49):
It used to be open.
Speaker 4 (15:51):
That's funny. It's lart. Huh No, I just like to
rattle door knobs.
Speaker 7 (16:00):
I'm good at the open one minute and locked the
next minute.
Speaker 4 (16:03):
The wind, that's all it is. The wind blew it shut?
Speaker 1 (16:06):
Who blew it open?
Speaker 4 (16:09):
That? He stopped asking silly questions?
Speaker 1 (16:11):
What's silly about that, Bud?
Speaker 4 (16:14):
Let's see if Jim, father, never mind, Bud, it's open again?
Holy how all right? Everybody, Let's get inside before the
darn thing changes its mind again.
Speaker 6 (16:32):
Jim, this is a haunted house, Margaret.
Speaker 1 (16:35):
I don't want to go into the haunted house.
Speaker 4 (16:37):
Yes, he stopped being ridiculous. There's no such thing as
a haunted house.
Speaker 6 (16:41):
Jim. I know you don't believe in ghosts and haunted houses.
Speaker 4 (16:45):
Margaret, you don't either, No sensible person does.
Speaker 2 (16:48):
Of course, Dear, But why did the bridge table float
in the air at the Palmers?
Speaker 5 (16:54):
It was a trick, Margaret, just like all the other
stupid things Will Palmer did tapping on the floor or
in weird voices.
Speaker 4 (17:01):
You saw how he.
Speaker 6 (17:01):
Did those, but he didn't explain about the table.
Speaker 5 (17:05):
He forgot, that's all. And if you don't mind, I
just as soon forget too. Let's go inside, all right,
can't be.
Speaker 6 (17:14):
I'm only a little girl. I'm only nine years old. Angel,
Nothing's going.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
To hurt you. Uh, turn on the lights, bud, mother?
Speaker 1 (17:28):
Is it all right if I just wait in the car.
Speaker 4 (17:31):
You're staying right here with us, how about it? But
nothing happens. Well, we'll get a light somehow. Now, what's
the matter?
Speaker 1 (17:44):
I just roughed in with spider web?
Speaker 4 (17:46):
EWW? Will please stop complaining and close the door?
Speaker 1 (17:52):
Jumping creepers.
Speaker 8 (17:54):
All I wanted to do was get into the sixth grade.
Speaker 6 (18:07):
Cassy dead.
Speaker 4 (18:08):
There's an oor lamp over here. Fine, now we're getting somewhere.
But there isn't any oil in it. But yes, that
see what else you can find? It isn't any good,
isn't any good for what? Just never mind? Oh gosh,
(18:29):
I was only trying to bother no.
Speaker 1 (18:31):
Self grad.
Speaker 4 (18:35):
Stupid door. But don't look at me, Dad, I wasn't
any place near it. I know you weren't. I was really. Oh,
here's what it is. It's just a loose screw.
Speaker 1 (18:46):
I knew there was a screw loose sunplace.
Speaker 5 (18:51):
You see this, Margaret. The latch is unfastened. When the
wind blows, the latch slides over and the door opens.
Speaker 4 (18:56):
Why couldn't you open it before? Because the latch gets
hung up when the more bang shut and stop bothering me.
There's nothing mysterious about it.
Speaker 8 (19:05):
I'll be happy to finish the fourth grade.
Speaker 6 (19:09):
Jim.
Speaker 4 (19:09):
It's very cold in here, yeah, kind of clamming.
Speaker 1 (19:14):
Wouldn't it be warmer if we all just sat in
the car.
Speaker 5 (19:17):
We'll get a fire started in here and that'll take
care of everything. Jim, Honey, there's nothing in here that
can hurt anybody. A nice friendly fire in the fireplace,
it'll make all.
Speaker 4 (19:26):
The difference in the world. How about getting some wood, Bud.
Here's a whole pile of newspapers.
Speaker 7 (19:31):
Good, hey, you know who's gonna run for president?
Speaker 4 (19:34):
Cool edge?
Speaker 5 (19:39):
But let's get the fire started and stop with the jokes.
Speaker 4 (19:43):
What jokes?
Speaker 6 (19:44):
Just oh, get some wood, Jim.
Speaker 2 (19:51):
I know it isn't anything to be worried about, but
that door gives me the creeps.
Speaker 5 (19:57):
Well i'll fix that. Get this chair wedged under the
door knob, and there we are. Now i'd like to
see it open. Come on, Bud, let's get going with
the wood.
Speaker 4 (20:09):
Where do I get wood? I don't care where you
get it, just get it. Good grief. Well that's a novelty, Daddy, Kathy,
you know I can't stand that. What stop whining?
Speaker 1 (20:24):
I was whining, Daddy.
Speaker 4 (20:26):
Hand me some of that newspaper, Betty? Will you please?
Speaker 1 (20:28):
What a time to read?
Speaker 4 (20:33):
Betty?
Speaker 6 (20:33):
Help your father build a fire?
Speaker 8 (20:35):
Okay, Kathy, yes, Daddy, you're whining again.
Speaker 1 (20:41):
I didn't even make a sound. Here's the paper, father,
Thank you.
Speaker 4 (20:45):
We'll have some light in here in just about two seconds.
How's this for a dad? Fine, Bud, there we are.
That's a little better, isn't it. Let's have the wood, Bud. Mother, Jim,
it's an owl, Margaret, that's all. It is, just an owl.
Speaker 1 (21:05):
I don't like owls.
Speaker 4 (21:07):
You don't like anything.
Speaker 6 (21:10):
And what is it?
Speaker 4 (21:11):
Smoke doesn't seem to be going up the chimney especially,
must have their nests up there. Want me to open
a window? Dead, Yeah, I guess I think, father, Jim.
(21:32):
The chair it's gold. I want to go in just
a minute. There.
Speaker 5 (21:35):
There must be a little logical explanation. Chairs don't just
walk off by themselves, do they?
Speaker 7 (21:42):
But this one didn't? You just put it in the fireplace. Well,
you said you didn't care.
Speaker 1 (21:53):
Where I got the wood.
Speaker 6 (21:56):
The smoke is getting awful.
Speaker 4 (21:57):
But opened the window at the top of the stairs
and see if we can't get a little cross ventilation
in here. Bud do this? Bud do?
Speaker 7 (22:04):
That sounds like the only name you ever heard of
was fun.
Speaker 4 (22:10):
I said, I have to open the window. Hey, I
want to go home. What is it? It was a cab.
I guess I stepped on its tail. Well, stop fooling
around and open the window.
Speaker 8 (22:26):
Who father, Daddy, I have a wonderful ice here.
Speaker 4 (22:33):
Let's go. Jim.
Speaker 5 (22:35):
It's a dog, Margaret, that's all, just a dog howling
at the moon, dog's.
Speaker 1 (22:40):
Howl when somebody dies.
Speaker 4 (22:43):
Now there's a pleasant bit of internt.
Speaker 5 (22:48):
I'm only a little girl, please, I'm not having a
bad enough time people jumping every time a dog howls
or an owl hoops or a door squeaks. But why
(23:16):
do you have to sneak up in back of people
like that?
Speaker 4 (23:19):
I didn't sneak up in back of you. You certainly did, Jim.
What's that a cow? Just a plain ordinary cow. What's
a cow doing up this time of night looking for
another cow?
Speaker 6 (23:36):
It's rolls, Jim. All those peculiar noises, they.
Speaker 4 (23:45):
Aren't peculiar noises.
Speaker 5 (23:46):
We're out in the country and they're just plain ordinary noises.
Speaker 4 (23:50):
But they sound so weird, father, what's the matter? We
heard something?
Speaker 5 (23:56):
You're imagining things, all of you. You heard the wind
whistling through the trees.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
It didn't sound like the wind, all right?
Speaker 5 (24:04):
What did it sound like like that?
Speaker 4 (24:09):
Oh? That's nothing. It's just a board creaking, that's all, Jim.
Speaker 6 (24:19):
We've got to get out of here.
Speaker 4 (24:20):
How where are we going to go? I don't care where.
Let's just go. I'm only nine years old, all right.
Can't we leave right now? Not that there's anything to
be afraid of. Father, it's coming closer.
Speaker 1 (24:41):
It's a big white.
Speaker 4 (24:44):
Oh boy, Jim, all right, we've got you covered. Stay
where you are. Are your folks folks? Oh, yes, we're folks.
Who are you. I'm a new caretaker, just moved in tonight,
(25:05):
and I'm not sure I like this job, jem. You see,
there wasn't anything to be afraid of. Maybe the rank now,
but I was sure scared before. You see, for a
while I figured maybe you was ghosts.
Speaker 3 (25:45):
When you buy coffee, you certainly want to get the
most in flavor for your money, and you know the
world's greatest coffee expert can help you find it. Yes, ma'am,
Just at a steaming cup of Maxwell House coffee in
front of your husband. He's the night number one expert.
Watch him smile at the first sip. Listen to him
say best coffee I ever tasted. Right then you'll know
(26:09):
you've found the flavor. You'll know that Maxwell House is
your coffee. Buy bring home a pound of Maxwell House tomorrow.
Speaker 4 (26:17):
See how much your husband enjoys every cupful.
Speaker 3 (26:20):
And count all the truly good cups of coffee you
get from just one of those familiar blue tins. We
think you'll be convinced that Maxwell House Coffee gives you
the most for your money, because it's always good to
the last drop.
Speaker 4 (26:42):
The horrible night is over.
Speaker 3 (26:43):
At last, the Anderson's are home, safe and happy, and
as they dig into their breakfast cereal, Jim tells them exactly.
Speaker 5 (26:50):
How foolish they've been like this. I've never been so
ashamed of anyone in my entire life. Why you acted
as though we were living in the Middle Ages.
Speaker 4 (27:00):
I wasn't scared, Dad, You certainly were. I certainly wasn't.
Speaker 1 (27:05):
You were just as scared as anybody, wasn't he, Kathy,
He wasn't as scared.
Speaker 6 (27:09):
As I was.
Speaker 1 (27:10):
I was real scared of what.
Speaker 4 (27:13):
Everything had a logical explanation, didn't it. Jim? Hello, Margaret,
you finally decided to come to the party. Huh. You
haven't said a word since we sat.
Speaker 6 (27:22):
Down at the table. Jim, there was a phone call
before you got up. Oh, who wasn't Will Palmer? He
said he hadn't been able to sleep a wink all night.
Speaker 4 (27:31):
Good serves him right? What do you want?
Speaker 6 (27:34):
He want you to call him?
Speaker 4 (27:35):
What for? We just saw him yesterday?
Speaker 6 (27:37):
He wants you to tell him how you did that
trick where the bridge table floats in the air.
Speaker 3 (27:44):
Oh No, tell the kids it's a hot favorite with Hoppy.
(28:05):
That's hot post wheatmeal. And if you have trouble getting
the youngsters to eat a hot cereal, just tell them
how much hop Along Cassidy loves that rich, brown, hot
post tweetmeal. Post wheatmeal is chuck full of good, solid nourishment.
It has a wonderful nut like flavor. It cooks in
just three and a half minutes. And tell the kids
it's Hoppy's favorite hot post wheatmeal. You'll see you'll all
(28:28):
agree it's the best hot cereal you ever ate. Join
us again next week when we'll be back with Father
Knows Best, starring Robert Young as Jim Anderson with Roy
Bargee on the Maxwell House Orchestra and yours truly, Bill Forman.
(28:49):
So until next Thursday, good night and good luck from
the makers of Maxwell House, America's favorite brand of coffee,
always good to the last drop, Father Knows Best, transcribed
in Hollywood and written by Ed James. Now stay tuned
in for Dragnet, which follows immediately over most of these stations.
Speaker 4 (29:18):
Robert Young again reminding you to stay tuned for Dragnet
on NBC
Popular Podcasts
24/7 News: The Latest
The latest news in 4 minutes updated every hour, every day.
Dateline NBC
Current and classic episodes, featuring compelling true-crime mysteries, powerful documentaries and in-depth investigations. Follow now to get the latest episodes of Dateline NBC completely free, or subscribe to Dateline Premium for ad-free listening and exclusive bonus content: DatelinePremium.com
The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show
The Clay Travis and Buck Sexton Show. Clay Travis and Buck Sexton tackle the biggest stories in news, politics and current events with intelligence and humor. From the border crisis, to the madness of cancel culture and far-left missteps, Clay and Buck guide listeners through the latest headlines and hot topics with fun and entertaining conversations and opinions.