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May 6, 2024 • 44 mins
Prepare to be inspired by the remarkable journey of Bonnie-Jill Laflin - a true trailblazer who has shattered glass ceilings and left an indelible mark on the sports industry. From becoming the first female NBA scout to earning multiple championship rings, Bonnie-Jill's unwavering passion and determination have propelled her to unprecedented heights.

As a pioneering sports broadcaster, philanthropist, and TV personality, she has captivated audiences with her charismatic personality and unparalleled expertise. Bonnie-Jill's remarkable accomplishments, including being the first woman to dance professionally for three teams in two sports, serve as a testament to the power of following your dreams and breaking down barriers.

Join Kate, Megan, and Bonnie-Jill as they delve into her inspiring story, exploring the challenges she has overcome and the milestones she has achieved. Prepare to be motivated and empowered by Bonnie-Jill's trailblazing journey, and discover how her unwavering spirit can inspire us all to reach for the stars.
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Episode Transcript

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(00:00):
Hey y'all, Bonnie Jill Lathlin here,

(00:02):
first and only female scout in the NBA
and current sports reporter and host,
and this is her table.
Now you see her.
(upbeat music)
You are magnificent!
(upbeat music)
Welcome to her table, the podcast that shines a spotlight
on the badass women who are redefining the game.
Join host, Kate Foley, and Megan Martinez

(00:23):
has paid unlock the secrets of success
in the brightest female pioneers in the industry.
Welcome back to her table.
We are so excited to welcome Bonnie Jill Lathlin
to the show today.
Bonnie was one of the first and only female NBA scouts
where she held a front office executive position
with the Los Angeles Lakers.
She holds so many firsts, like which is the first first, Megan.

(00:45):
I don't know which is the first first,
but she was the first female to be awarded
six championship rings in two professional sports,
earning a Super Bowl ring during her time with the 49ers,
and five, that's right ladies and gentlemen,
five NBA championship rings as an executive
for the Los Angeles Lakers.
Beyond her accomplishments in sports,

(01:05):
Bonnie Jill also ventured into the world of broadcasting.
She has worked as a reporter and host
for various high-profile networks,
including ESPN and Fox Sports.
What hasn't she done?
I came in to learn more about Bonnie Jill,
so let's get started.
Welcome to her table.
(upbeat music)
Have you ever been put in, as you've started

(01:25):
and gone through your career, you know, oftentimes
people perceive you as one thing,
and they expect you to be one thing,
and you turn out being the other, right?
Where it's, it's you talked earlier, like they see me,
and I'm not a hooper, I'm not someone that,
you know what I mean, that's just not me.
And they're used to seeing girls
that are that in this position,

(01:45):
so it's an uncomfortable position to be that trailblazer,
and you've done that time and time and time again.
How do you keep drawing from that cup every time?
It's hard.
It's hard, Kate, you get discouraged at times,
and you gotta, for example, I'm with the Jordan Brand,
I've been with the Jordan Brand for a long time,
but when I first was there, there were people like,
"Oh, what college did you play basketball?"

(02:07):
I was under a size on the bar,
I played high school, I couldn't make any further,
but then I started talking,
all of a sudden MJ would be like,
"Oh, there's just a scout."
Like, listen to this girl top.
Like, she's the only female I know
who can break down the triangle office.
We have players who can even run the triangle,
and then all of a sudden, they're like,
"Oh, but you're so right, it's like that perception
of like, oh, one dimensional, oh, she must be just a pretty girl

(02:29):
who can't speak."
And it's like, no, it's like, we have so much more to offer.
Girls I cheer to with, you know,
bunch of the doth can't wait cheerleaders,
people thought, again, oh, they're just pretty girls,
fluff on the sidelines, three of them are lawyers,
big time lawyers, two of them end up being doctors.
Like, it's funny though, how attorneyed all of that stuff
and it's funny how people perceive their perception.

(02:49):
It's like, oh, you know, that there's only one kind
of situation for you.
It's like, oh, they're gonna end up being a trophy wipe
or they're just a pretty girl when they turn 30s,
they're done because their looks are gone.
You know what I mean?
So it's funny how there's so much misconception
and stereotypes and I think we've gone such a long, you know,
making big strides came making, but at the same time,
you still see it.

(03:10):
I'm not gonna mention who it is,
because I actually really like her and I'm friends with her.
But a female had stated that when she does her sideline reports
that she doesn't talk to the coach, you know,
and so, I'm sure you guys heard about this.
So I didn't, so can you place Philadelphia and NGK me
even though you don't all the time?
Megan's like, don't do it.
I'm like, no.
I was a female went on a very big sportscaster.

(03:33):
She went on, I'm not gonna say where,
but she went on a podcast and she basically said
that she made up her reports when she was interviewing college.
She was doing stuff.
Oh, okay.
I know what we're talking about.
Got it.
Yeah.
And so, but it was crazy how, and that was all kind
of tongue in cheek if you watch it.
She's kind of being funny, like whatever, right?
That's kind of how she is too.

(03:54):
But you saw how so many females were so offended,
so insulted because they put so much time and energy
into the reports, it's a research, like all of us know,
like I said two days before, you're writing,
right, right, right, right, right, right,
you're watching everything.
So then when that happens, it sets us back
because if you looked at all the comments,
it was a ton and ton of men say,
this is why women shouldn't be in sport.
This is why women should be sideline reports.

(04:15):
This is why women shouldn't have a potential.
So, and much is that was funny.
And if a guy did it, that would be funny.
And no one would talk about it.
No, for a female, that set us way back, right, way back.
And it was so easy.
It was so easy.
It's like, you can't, it drives me nuts
because it's like, again, no one would have come
so hard for a guy for that.

(04:37):
No, no.
And it's so disappointing because, you know, yes.
I do need to be aware of what we're saying
in the audience.
And I hated it.
And Megan and I always joke when we're like,
not sure if something on the show, because like, whatever.
We have real jobs.
We have real jobs.
And that's a real job.
Let me not do that because I was going to come
with a real job.
This is a real job.
But we have other things that we do as well.

(04:59):
And so we're not versed in this.
I didn't go to school for this.
Like, we don't have to have the time.
Get it right.
We get it wrong.
We get it right.
But like, I constantly catch myself being like,
oh, don't come for me or, oh, I'm not sure.
Or like, I'm not sure that this means.
So you know what I mean?
And you're constantly second guessing yourself
in your mind to allow space for or not
allow space for those people to not allow you to be confident.

(05:22):
Like, what if I get it wrong?
OK, I'm sorry.
Am I human being?
Like, I get it wrong.
But then she was fun like joking around.
And she's like, a lot of the coaches will say the same thing
after half time.
We all know what they're going to be kind of like.
No, 100%.
100%.
And how many times have they done it?
Like, literally, my guys are like, I'm like, how shoot
around?
They're like, that was my 100 millionth shoot

(05:44):
around.
It was the same.
And I'm just asking you to create conversation
and be engaged.
And for you, it's like, it's the same as it was yesterday.
Yeah, but then the coaches say the same thing.
It's almost like, you just know that they're going to say.
So what she was kind of, what she was looting to is that sometimes
you didn't get a chance to grab savings.
So she knew that you kind of know what he was going to say,

(06:06):
talk about the defencing's wear, dress, whatever it may be.
And so I think that is it turned bad, though.
And a lot of her colleagues and different women in sports,
as you all know, like turn on her and still have this turn.
Willie--
OK, I thought she was going to be wondering
whether Lloyd that's him, like, sign.
But it was--

(06:26):
He's discriminated to, Connie Jell.
He's like, I hear it.
Yeah, he's engaged in the fight.
Yeah.
And so it was just--
it was kind of disheartening because--
and I want to say this because, y'all,
I feel like we'll hear me out on this.
I-- the whole women empowerment in sports.
It is fantastic.
I love it.
It's so great.
However, don't say and put it on your social media

(06:47):
that you empower women.
You think they're great in this and this.
But when it comes down to battle for them
and to have their back, you're the first one that
goes after them.
Because there's too many women.
I've gone through a lot of women where they talk about--
and love mentoring women.
Love them, part women.
I'm like, no, I remember when I was young,
and I came to you and I met you.
And you were vicious to me because you
thought I was coming for your job.

(07:07):
So it's like, walk the lot.
Talk to talk.
Don't put it through social.
You don't have to act like it's
women's history, not all about it.
Be real.
But don't act like, oh, I love helping women out.
I'm like, bitch, shut up.
You do not like helping women.
It's like stuff.
So I'm still not loving the fact that all these women
act like they support each other when they really jump

(07:28):
at the end of the day.
It's saying there's-- and I'm getting
to be real about it.
There are a lot of men who love each other.
And it takes--
It's very sad.
And I think it's one of the things, even for me,
it is you learned quickly throughout my career.
I've learned who is a friend of Serpent Stance
and who is a friend of yours.

(07:49):
Yes.
And that was how I defined it.
Because some of these people, I'm like,
I spent 10 years with my life with you.
And you know everything about me.
But when you're not there anymore, they're not there anymore.
And it's pardoning because you're like, wait,
I thought we were friends.
I thought you cared.
I thought you gave a shit.
You know my kids.

(08:09):
And we have this whole thing.
And we're friends until you're going for the thing job.
Or you know--
Yeah, as a friend of Serpent Stance or a friend of choice.
And then it's helped me really navigate how I want to show up.
For what someone didn't do for me,
I try and do it better for them.
Exactly.
Exactly.
And so all of a sudden, I want you to help me out.

(08:29):
It's not for me.
But I'm like, I don't want anybody else to feel that.
And I think that's just like the real and raw reality
of it because so many times there are women
who have the opportunity to lean in.
And they can't or they don't know how.
And because sometimes you can't.
Sometimes someone telling you don't do that,
don't do that.
You're going to get producers, what's producers or teams

(08:52):
or whatever.
Someone's giving them direction and until they
can figure it out on their own.
And so many people say to me, how do you not
be upset by this?
And I'm like, oh, I'm upset.
But I'm not letting it drive or dictate how I respond to it.
Doesn't mean I'm not ready to go in.
It just means that it's not worth the energy I'm going
to expect.

(09:12):
Exactly.
That's why I just kind of kill him with kindness.
But I just-- it's crazy.
And yeah, I'm not trying to-- you don't need
any best friends with every woman in sports.
But you can encourage and empower and be--
you know what I mean?
Happy and applaud them.
You don't mean like--
that's why I think they're certain women
that really are good about that.
Joy Taylor is amazing.
She does this women in sports event

(09:32):
that we all go to at the Super Bowl.
And she's so good.
She's also in the back of my book
and someone who endorsed it.
She really is that girl.
You know what I mean?
She's that girls girl.
But then there's the ones that-- you
see them for the first time you go to shake their hand.
And they look at you like you're crazy and they walk away.
And it's like, you're like, oh, OK.
Noted.
Got that.
And you smile the next time you see them whatever.

(09:54):
But it's just-- you know which ones.
We all know, which girls are really girls girls.
And we know the ones that aren't.
I just wish that they knew that there was space for--
I compete against myself.
I'm not competing against any other female.
And I like to be around greatness.
I like to be around people that are doing big things.
And doing things.
So I just-- I like to have girls around me.

(10:16):
They're successful.
They're pretty like, I don't know.
I bet I'm just different.
I like that.
I gravitate.
Some people don't.
They don't like that.
And I don't know.
I just wish that would be more like how we are right now.
You know, always--
First of all, I think there's some men.
And I was going to ask you to talk to about Kobe.
There are some men that lean in so hard.

(10:37):
They lean in more than women.
And so I love when I see leadership be profoundly secure
enough to bring other people along, right?
Because eventually we're all going to be out of this.
Everyone's going to die.
We're all not in this room.
So like the culture and the standard that you set,
it starts at the top down.

(10:59):
And even being on the player side, right?
The culture and leadership within an organization dictates
the culture and leadership in the locker room, which dictates
the culture and leadership within the players, which
then goes into the fans, which then goes into the support
staff, right?
And I say all the time to my athletes,
like we were--
I dinner the other night, and they walked out in front of me.

(11:20):
And I said, hey, no big deal.
But keep in mind, I'm the only girl here.
So I want you to look out for any female that you were with
on a team the same way that you're going to look out for me,
right?
I don't know if you said that because the mom hired her to that.
But you know what I said?
They're just like whatever, blah, blah, blah.
But I'm like, you know, you don't know what can happen.

(11:41):
So you guys leave.
And then I'm walking behind you.
Anything can happen.
I wouldn't want you guys to be in that situation.
Hey, next time it happens, because that's
happened to me before I stopped.
And then all of a sudden you turn around like, what are you
doing?
I'm like, oh, go on.
First of all, you're on a 70-chall.
So I am five.
But it is taking me in heels a lot longer.
Not longer.
[INAUDIBLE]

(12:01):
Like we are.
I don't know.
No, but they don't.
So for me, as a woman, I'm like, OK, let me let you know.
Because maybe no one's told you before.
So it's like, hey, just make sure I get to the car safely.
And it's not me being needy.
It's me saying any female on a team, there's a ton of people.
You need to speak to them this way, approach them this way.
It's like, you know, Deon Sanders says, you don't call them.

(12:24):
You can call them ma'am.
Their first name or coach, whatever.
But anything less than that is not acceptable.
They do.
You have to say those things.
Because people don't know that's not OK,
because other women have let that be OK.
And I'm not saying it's-- for some people, it's not for me.
So you have to set the standard of the way
you want to be approached and spoken to and met with

(12:48):
as opposed to just what they're used to.
Because ultimately, they don't know.
Right.
And man, or just it's like, yeah, we're still females.
But I'm still old-fashioned.
I'm independent, a strong female can take for myself.
But I still-- if I meet you, you better stand up and shake my hand.
Don't ever-- you never sit down and shake someone's hand.
I said that's the other way.
I don't know.
I was like, you did get up.

(13:09):
I've already sized you up.
I'm like, you're always a beautiful name.
Don't just say my name's Kate.
Then they don't know.
I just met a girl named Kate.
You have to say, my name is this.
Bull of names.
And I was raised with no man, yes, sir.
Like so-- oh, man, these-- that-- you're saying I'm old.
I'm like, it's called respect.
No.
That's with your face.

(13:29):
Like, I would get the belt if I didn't say anything.
Right?
So--
I'm just grateful to know.
I like the old-- I like a guy open your door for me.
I like a guy that helps me with my suitcase when it's 1,000 pounds.
And I can't throw it all over her head.
And said, everyone is staring at me.
And then boys think, I wasn't sure if I could help you or not.
Because last time I helped a girl, she got mad at me.
It's like, stop.
Still let it go.

(13:50):
I don't know.
It's good.
We're correcting again, right?
I mean, I'm still people that want someone, a guy, to be still, you know, that traditional
way that I think some men are scared to do that.
Because they're like, oh, well, she's an independent woman.
I don't want to like--
Yeah.
--bound lose.
And it's like, no, please open the door.
Like, I've got a bad-- like, yeah, I--
Please, open the door for me.

(14:10):
I heard it come.
I'm really scared to be--
They have-- I said, you know, you hold the door for girls.
And you know, you're trying to teach them, you know?
And then their sister came out and they didn't.
And I'm like, you hold the door for girls.
And they're like, she's our sister.
And I'm like, she's a girl.
Like, you have to fall it out of it.
But it's so true.

(14:31):
Because they're like, well, it's just her.
And I'm like, no, it's-- they're principal.
Because for me, like I said, those little things make a difference.
And as we see more and more women in leadership positions, more and more women have different
roles within teams, organizations, and sports, everyone is different, right?
Everyone responds and wants and is in a different place in their life.

(14:52):
But the level of respect that you have and should give, it has to be consistent.
It can't be only doing this because she's pretty.
It's-- I do this for everyone, right?
You're taking the narrative away of like, you're as a man trying to get ahead because you're
doing it for the pretty one or the one in charge or the one that's-- so you're doing
it from the lady that drives the bus to the one that checks you in to the one that signs

(15:15):
your paychecks.
You're the same consistent person.
That's how they build authenticity and then comfort.
Right?
Right?
Yeah, it's so true.
And then-- but then there's also the guys who are scared to go do things like, you know, I
saw like when I was in one of those shuttles in the airport, they literally this guy like
stood up for one of the ladies to sit down, you know, one of those one that's taking the

(15:38):
terminals.
And he was like, my mom would kill me if I didn't do it.
But then you could tell the girl was kind of like, oh, is he hitting on me?
I'm like, no, he's just being a gentleman.
So there's that whole thing now where it's like men sometimes are scared to do certain things
because they think that they're going to be called out because, do you know what I mean?
Because that whole me too thing and all that stuff.
So it's like, you know, there's that happy media, right?
Well, you have to try to-- but I still have a guy to be a guy and to be a gentleman.

(16:03):
And I think that's--
All right.
So if you're watching this and you're taking money on a date, you better open the door.
Don't let her carry a bag.
Like, you might go up with some flowers.
Like, oh, yeah.
I'm just a good one.
Yeah.
Yeah.
To the point where like I like a miss, I notice over the top of it, I'm at a dinner and I'm using
the restroom.
You better stand up.
Oh, wow.

(16:23):
That's like Southern.
That's like old school.
Or why would you be like, open the door for me to get in the car?
Like, yeah.
I have too hands to do it.
But like, open it for me.
I don't know.
Again, that's the funny thing that I'm so strong and dependent, but those are the things
that go a long way with me.
I don't know.
But I'm really just off of playing.

(16:44):
I was coming in from voicier Seattle and this older guy gets my bag and he like takes it and
helps me and like honestly, like, it was just him doing it was so sweet.
Like, I probably could have gone and he's like super old.
But like when I left, I literally tore his wife.
I'm like, you have the nicest husband because no guys ever do that anymore.
And it's like, they can't ever happen.
So it's like, when you see that, it's like men in the back.

(17:06):
Look at this older man who's a bet, whatever.
We love that.
And that's like, let's keep it going, you know?
That's so funny.
You see that, right?
Because any time a guy helps me, like, oh, I'm glad there's one gentleman here on the flag
because I'm super loud and doxious sometimes.
And they were looking at me and like, yeah, I had a bag.
You could see me sweating, trying to push it over.
And no one's anything except this guy.
And then everyone gets all quiet.
Like, well, we didn't know if one of them, like, no, he's guy.

(17:28):
We got the one gentleman.
We're good.
Thanks.
The flag goes down.
We'll call this guy.
So it's like, because it's so funny how men don't help women anymore.
I know.
I think it's a little different.
Some of the women are saying younger generation.
They're really--
I will say this.
The other side to that coin is it's also very intimidating.
Like, people always say to me all the time, like, you're so intimidating for yourself.

(17:50):
I mean, when you are attractive in an a place of leadership or you're very comfortable in
yourself, it is intimidating.
Like, it's people looking at you like, if I help her.
And maybe it's just, you know, I need to smile at you.
You're not eating up on her or whatever.
No.
So it's not.
I'm just dating with my glasses on and my Louis Vuitton with not smiling at all.
That means I'm a look intimidating.

(18:11):
I know.
I know.
Yeah, yeah.
That's your first saying.
I wouldn't say.
Because I'm so cool.
I haven't like put on my makeup on.
So I have my sunglasses on.
But I look super pretentious.
But then it's just being tired.
But yeah, you're right.
There's the other side.
But at the same time, it shouldn't stop you from doing what's right.
You know.
I think, you know, it's, we went through this whole phase in sports where it was about locker room talk, right?

(18:36):
And what's acceptable in the locker room is an acceptable in public, right?
Where, you know, and, and now I always say, especially to my young athlete, it's like, you have to be aware of everyone around you and what their level of comfort or discomfort is.
Like, it's funny.
So we're playing the other night and they all wanted to play like skins and shirts and, you know, take their shirt off.

(18:58):
I think I'll show off my tad is blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
And I'm like, look, I don't mind.
It doesn't bother me.
I don't even pay attention.
But there are other people in this gym that that might make them uncomfortable.
And so it's not necessarily about what you want.
It's about what's in the room and the time and place to do it.
Yeah.

(19:19):
I said, you love this sort of that.
Exactly.
Because you can be a decision.
Yeah, what could be a decision between you getting a job or not getting a job?
And so there's something as simple as that because they're like, well, they weren't aware of these young girls in here.
You know what I mean, that are interning or whatever.
And it's you just have to kind of read the room.
And I think that's the lost skill is reading the room and knowing what is the time and place to, you know what I mean, to do something because it's, it was social media.

(19:46):
Everything's so fast, so quick.
It's, it's, it's, they're forever.
There is no to lead it, right? Like it's, it's, it's easier to build something than it is to repair something.
Right.
And so that is kind of like my mantra with the young guys is, let's build something slowly instead of just blow it up.
And then I got to rebuild it and I got broken pieces. The shit doesn't work.
Like it's a mess.

(20:07):
So trying to get them to not want that fame so quickly, but also knowing that I always joke because I'm like, whoever you meet, you're going to see again.
I don't care. You will see that person again at some point in sports. You will see that sports. It's so small.
Somewhere else.
And so I get so mad because, you know, everyone's like, oh, agents are so difficult.

(20:29):
And they're all assholes and they're all mean and the Puerto Rican team was in town playing us again.
There are, she was like, I think all agents are assholes. And I'm like, well, they kind of are, but I'm not.
And then you just, you know, you're like, you're so nice. And you're so nice. Like I did not expect you to be like that.
And I think the lot comes across the board. You've entertainment agents like ever their agents as a totally.

(20:53):
And then you have to like rework the narrative because I'm already working against their perception of what they've seen on TV.
Someone they've experienced.
So you have to work extra hard to break their well down.
And I try and give people that grace because they might have had a really bad experience.
But then I've also had really bad experiences too. So you have to give me grace of why I am the way that I am. Like we're just people.

(21:17):
Right.
Just people.
But it's, it's honestly what's been your high of your career and what has been.
I say low, but that sounds kind of like depressing. What has been your high and what has been an opportunity you wish that you did not have to go through.
I mean, there's so many lows. I hate to say that. I mean, when I mean lows, like you know, there are so many times where just being down just, you know, having just what I went through with the Boston club and so many different media outlets and TMZs and different people just attacking me and, you know, and even when it was in fun.

(21:50):
You know what I mean? It's like they were saying, you know, in your human at the end of the day.
She says, much is I'm like thick skin and my kind of care blah blah. You still go home like that. That's suck. That was really me.
So I was like, you kind of go through that and then but it builds your character. It does build, you know, your who you are. And I think it made me like I said before and not to reiterate, but just like that.

(22:15):
You're going to say that I can't do something. I will prove you wrong and I will work out. I'll work you and you know that's one thing and you can't beat me as I will out work you I will come prepared.
You know, there's something to be said with that. So I just always knew that I had to be kind of over the top in trying to make sure that you were going to make sure that understood that I was credible and it may take the extra mile.

(22:39):
But you know in time, you know, and it did it was you know, but it took a long time even like when I was this is a GM for the players for the D league.
It was funny because of the D league at the time now it's called Julie, but they literally had guides who were trying out for the team who literally were trying to hit up on me and they're like, that's the boss lady.
Like you can't they call you know you can't you know you can't be hitting up on it. What? Oh my god. And they come out to me. I'm so sorry. Like I thought like what did you think I was doing here is sweat like I'm a poor.

(23:09):
It's like like the football like what do you like it's like anyway, but it was funny, but I was I'm also not that I get it right. I'm also aware of the fact that I'm a female that they're not used to.
So I was always like it's fine. Like I don't you know, and even then I became so close with all my guys just like how far you are case. So it's like they end up becoming almost like your your kids.
You know you want them to do well. And so there was the lows, but it was trying to find the sober lining in it all, you know, which was you have to do that and everything.

(23:35):
And then the high was probably just like so many highs. I mean going from that's so much sweeter right when you accomplish something because you've worked so hard.
So the first being 18 years old and you know cheering at the Super Bowl, you know with 49ers. That was great because I didn't even understand what was going on really.
Oh wow. Like this is that made to you're so I was still high schools. It was you know it was pretty amazing. And then being through the five championships, you know with the Lakers and being so close with Cobb and Shaquille and having so many of my big brothers really helped me up, you know, when I was down and and nothing.

(24:10):
It was very much like I was like a little sister. So it was it was nice that they believed in me because sometimes as much as it's great to have family supports also nice have support within the relations and within the teams.
And that was always nice. And then I think at the end of the day just using my platform being able to have my platform to do good and doing 19 you as so towards overseas to ferment and women when during the course of Iraq and Afghanistan and being able to boost morale and being able to do my charity work with Emma welfare and the troops.

(24:39):
I think that's the biggest thing I like is that I have been able to use my platform for good and feel to get back and as much as it's great to have rings that have money and success at the end of the day, you have to pay it forward and be able to give back and you have that platform.
Like I have now it's a lot of it is being able to pay for that's really important to me. My charity work.
Yeah, I love that too. And I was saying like reading up on what you're like philanthropy is and like taking care of like dogs and rescue dogs and bringing them in and I love that.

(25:08):
How about like I think even like writing a book is such like a big thing too for women. Can you kind of touch on that? How you got that idea and like what yeah, like how it all even started.
Yeah, it was so tough though because writing a book is like I first of all I went I had so many publishers that can't get me and they're like, oh, we want you to do a tell-all book.
You're like well and I'm like they're like, well, we have memoir but we want you to tell all like we did a set the cowboy and with the Lakers I'm like, oh, so you want me to sit there and talk shit about my dear dear friend and talk about the owner, you know, Dr. Lee, you know, the late Dr. Jerry bus and Jerry Jones and do they want it all the drama?

(25:43):
They're like it'll sell. Oh, I'm on an idiot. I know it'll sell. I said, I have integrity and I go, I don't know how much money you want for me. I want to do a book that inspires that does not.
So I had nose, nose, nose, you know for almost three years and finally the publisher Roman little feel like no, we know what you're trying to do. We love this.
And so they gave me nine months to write the book which you know, you think nine months is nothing to write a book and try to get all the people that I wanted and then you have to do a zoom and set up all the interviews and then transcribe and then write the chapters and then rewrite and get the pictures and, you know, you know,

(26:18):
you finally the cover and get the endorsement so much work and so much work. And I was like, are people even going to be receptive to this and then it just went coincide with like what was going on with Kate and Clark and so much different women were on this highlight of celebrating what they were doing and it was like, wow, this is actually
those perfect of my message and my why because it's like when you're first book, I'm not making ten of money, but I publish it in my agents making all the money. It's like this was for me and he's just inspired younger generation.

(26:47):
So it ended being a number one seller for Amazon on due releases and I'm like, wow, that's it.
It was just that was the most rewarding being able to see that there's, you know, the younger women and moms who are like DMing me and texting me or seeing me a book signing saying, oh my gosh, this is like so great because I can
get a lot of money and the dads, you know, who are saying I can tell my daughter that she can be in sports and all that. The Taylor Swift, like a lot before against Taylor Swift, am I take on Taylor Swift.

(27:14):
She's bringing females to and in the bell. I first time I've actually had, you know, men say my daughter watches football with me now.
Whether it's you waiting to Taylor or Travis or whatever, and she's watching football with me and that's big and whether you hate her or not, it's like, yeah, I love that.
That she's brought the younger generation. So all that was all going on at the same time as my book. And so it's been really nice to see that there is that space for women and that, you know, we are still have along, you know, strides to go, but we're getting there.

(27:47):
I mean, what she has done for what was basketball and just women in sports, I'm like, yeah, I told my parents, grab like I have to do a second book. I have to keep them parking. I have to have Katie Ledeckian, it's going to be a beast at the Olympics.
You've got more gold medals than my profiles. We normally talks about her. Right. So there's so many females that need to be highlighted and of course I couldn't get them all in the first book. And so now my gosh, you know, there needs to be a second book.

(28:10):
There's so many females like yourselves are doing things and it's like every day you hear about someone I didn't know about. Oh my gosh, I don't know about this woman doing this. It's like that's like the beauty of like, you know, our community and the social media being able to see the women that are actually, you know, making a difference in women in the needle.
I also just think it's so important because you're actually telling that story. I mean, that's something it's funny. My team gets on me all the time of like, you have to tell your story. Tell what you did. Be proud of your accomplishments. Like, you have to go sell yourself. Like you have to literally go be like, I've done all this amazing shit in a short amount of time.

(28:43):
But I'm like, I don't want to. I'm not good at it. And I'm over here telling all of my clients like, go tell your story. Go share your story. Let's build it. It's easier to do for someone else. And it is to do for yourself.
A lot of reflection to be because I've been trained. You don't, but that's bragging. You're just showing out. That's what it's.
And the news is great. I love like when I'm doing an interview. But someone's like, what are you like, what did her tell us about my, I don't like, I don't know. I don't like doing.

(29:11):
When you're pitching something, I'm like, that's why my agent because they'll say, oh, she's so great. I'm so great. You should take on this part.
That's just not. I hate that. It's like, fringy to me. But it's like when you're being interviewed, you're asking questions. Or you, but I rather have like, you know, you rather have your team like pushing.
Like, I don't know. It's hard. It's so uncomfortable because you feel like yourself advocating. You feel like you're being too much. And you're, you know, looking for attention. And you're like, no, I'm just celebrating myself.

(29:42):
But I don't know what it was. But at some point in my life, it was, you know, ingrained in my mind of don't do that. Don't celebrate yourself. Don't get a don't draw attention. Don't go tell everyone all the cool things you did.
Because it looks there comes off as bragging or. She's bragging or she doesn't know you're trying to empower and inspire the women to know that.

(30:03):
Yeah.
I mean, it's a whole formula. It's, I mean, it's so much.
It's exhausting. It's so exhausting. And it's like, but it has to happen. And that's what I think. Like having you have to advocate for each other.
That's why I'm always like sharing other women's stories and being a plotting bang because that helps too because they don't want to like, I got themself. So I'm like, no, you're awesome. But it is home.

(30:30):
And you're in a, in a meeting. Yes, it's easy to kind of like push your project, push yourself. But it's like when you're just generally just talking about yourself.
Like I said, dinner. Of course, like, oh, no, that's just weird. Like, I don't want to talk about myself.
I get embarrassed. I get embarrassed. I'm like, so you know, I think narcissists are like, oh, I'm super cool. But for me, like, that's a narcissist. Like I date those guys. I'm not going to be that person, you know.

(30:53):
No, it's definitely interesting. But I do think it's, it's good for young girls to see you know, that's why for the show. That's what's so important for me in it is to be able to give a safe space to celebrate yourself. And if you're not going to, we're going to.
Because I want to be what I didn't have, right? So I want to be that person that's able to say like, and we've met so many amazing women that we're now friends with that had we not done this show had we not created this space.

(31:21):
We never would have. We just had this past weekend. Beth Stens was on our show. Alongside I think she's like one of our 10th guests. She wasn't next with me. And she came with me to a player appearance just to see what like my life was like at final.
And she is like, this isn't sanity. Oh my gosh. Like she works in sports. But she's like, this is wild. And she's like, this is so cool that you do this because when you hold it, respect if what you do.

(31:47):
Totally totally. What are you forget? What your life is actually what's normal for me is not normal for someone else. And so I'm like, this isn't that cool. This is like my.
This is my 100s shoot around this season. You know what I mean? It's another thing. So you almost have to be willing to let people love on you, celebrate you and power you and not push it away.

(32:09):
Right. That's all you have to have a good try. Whether it's your senior, your small close friends. But then your tribe of like like you like now. Like now they know y'all like, let's go to California where I'm out of Lakerga. I'm like, y'all come with me. Do you want to mean it?
Yeah. That's nice. Like have that. Did you know the good, I mean, let's just be honest. You know the ones you're like, yeah, I'd roll with her in the one. I go, oh, that was cool. Like she's probably we're not fine.

(32:34):
We're talking right here. So it's I was going to want us, you know, so it's like, hey, I'll still support you. But I'm not probably going to hang out with you.
Yeah. Well, like real and I can see that I can like hang out with you guys. No, when you're in LA, we'll go to Lake his game or Clippers. Yeah. Exactly. Or if you guys come to Texas, like I'll take you on the screen.
I want to go right horses like Megan.

(32:58):
And you can hold big lips and e-muse and you think, hey, you.
Listen, we're on this whole NASCAR thing right now because we're just engulfed in like, learn because NASCAR is back meaning to me is a fan experience.
And I know nothing about it. And so I'm like, we're just going to make a little tour and I love the lifestyle. So we're advocating production that we want our her table like tour bus basically.

(33:26):
And then we're going to start pulling up places and see what happens. Like, you know, you're not.
Because Danica, because Danica, you know, she's in Phoenix. She's in my book. And she. Yeah, I need to connect you with her. She's.
She's in Phoenix. So.
Let's do it. Now, well, I am so proud of you. I listen, keep championing, keep blazing, keep just building the bridge and making the step to the next place.

(33:54):
Because what you've accomplished and how much you've grown and your journey is just unspeakable. My book will be here tomorrow at 10 a.m. By the way, I just.
I love that. Thank you.
I have something to do for the weekend, but I also just want you to know how awesome it is that you have been able to maintain yourself.
Because it's so easy to get lost in this world of sports and who you are. And and I've been lost. Everyone gets lost.

(34:23):
It's kind of just being able to continually like pick up the pieces and have a puck at you. Because you all know there's so many, I mean, athletes, for example, you can let you get lost and then you start to lean on, you know, alcohol or drugs or being with around that people.
And that's.
So it's very easy to do right to slip into that. So it's it is like I said, it's like having your tribe, having other people support you and distinct focus and dialed in on like the prize constantly like, you know,

(34:51):
waking up each day with like something you want to accomplish like I have a to do less and it's like not just like running to get dry thing, but just like things you're wanting to accomplish like in your in your career and in your like your growth as a person and talk.
I do I talk about their face and very transparent about that. There's nothing wrong with that. I think it helps you grow.
Because you're always trying to be better right. We all have our weaknesses and I think it just but as you get older, I feel like you're you get more comfortable with that before it's like a therapist.

(35:19):
No, you know,
but then you start to see how it helps after you know, support the colleges and how it helps because so much of the game is mental. It's the same thing with us.
Like a bar mental health messed up and you're not going to be able to focus on the things that you need to you know, apologize. So what advice would you give to a younger you.
I think not caring so much about what people think of me because I think him when you're younger, you do you care so much about like I you want everyone to like you, you know, and if that's not that's not going to happen.

(35:51):
And then you get the point where now it's like, okay, whether you like me or hitting your so watching me, you kind of laugh right. And so it's like so much like you kind of change at the beginning. It's like you want everyone to like you and you wanted to be perfect and you wanted to know there's so many things that I've that that I've had to work on.
But I think the biggest thing that I still haven't been able to figure out is the balance like I still.

(36:12):
I think you're out balance. Maybe I wish I would have figured that out earlier in my career like I missed so many things throughout my career, you know, weddings and baby showers and you know all these different vacations and I can't tell you lots of such a vacation.
But it's like you you think about wow you're you're making money or successful, but you don't want to miss out on things in light that I missed out on or maybe a relationship that could have worked.

(36:35):
And I was so like no, you're going to you're going to be in my way. You know what I mean? So there are things I would have I wish I would have balanced out more and you kind of live and you learn, you know, but that's something that I would probably tell you know being focused and having that work at the beginning marriage, the game, but it is okay to have that balance.
I get burned out and I've been burned out for because you just go and you have to remember the end of the day like you're just a person too, you know, I might be all of these things and leadership and all of these things, but the other day you have to figure out who Kate the CEO is Kate the agent is Kate, mom is Kate friend is and then just who am I at the end of the day when just me sitting in a room.

(37:15):
Who am I and you have to kind of wear all these different hats and I think you know, yeah, I'm a joke all those hats and not be like, yeah, I'm always been like my friends will say you're kind of like a cyborg you're like so we're bought different.
Yeah, I mean, I'm kind of like, you know, you just I don't know you kind of turn like that.
The jobsters on fire, the house water doesn't work. The cars rolling down the street because I forgot to put it in the car.

(37:37):
It didn't pack the lunch and my phone's ringing so which of those things am I doing at this second right exactly because we're so good at multitasking right women are what it comes off sometime like I think I do come off some as robotic in certain times when I'm just trying to get so many things done and not having a lot of emotion behind it because I'm just like, okay, I don't care what it is.

(37:58):
Let's just get done like do that and be done, you know, so there's things all the thought about right but it just you know, well, it's also being vulnerable saying there are things to do.
I'm just saying there are things to work on because I think there's so many women that are just like everyone thinks you're perfect and I'm like, oh girl, please, my hair you combined at the store it's literally like you know what I mean like let's just be real about who we are not put this misconception of like this is it's it's not you know you're trying to.

(38:24):
Like you y'all say it's being real like I'm fine with showing you know just being transparent that like you have your flaws and you kind of make a joke about it and you work on it you know not take so serious you know that you have to that you know that we are weaknesses that's just like that make the beauty of the who we are otherwise would that would be it would be a cyborg you know it's
be weird.
It would be a robot you would be a robot.

(38:46):
Oh my gosh well we're coming to the ranch.
Yeah, you got a little Dallas and then you come to Cali come by the set hopefully it's when we're there.
We'll get some Tina's vodka and some mixers and we'll have a nice little yeah because maybe you're in LA and then change your feelings but you come to LA what.
Yeah, we film in Orange County we try and feel like one.
Okay there but I'm honestly I'm it's an easy flight for me between there and Vegas I spend a ton of time just because that's where I lot of.

(39:12):
I don't know if I've ever heard of it.
Oh do they work hard.
We're a fresh gift.
They have a ranch and fresh gift.
Okay.
That's not far.
I live in Phoenix or like in power.
I know.
Yeah, one of my best friends her she's from fresh it.

(39:33):
It's it's it's always funny to me it's like the cactus and then it's just like pung top.
I'm not going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.

(39:55):
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.

(40:16):
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.

(40:38):
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.

(41:03):
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.

(41:24):
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.

(41:46):
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.

(42:08):
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
I'm going to get the idea of what I'm going to do.
She had imposter syndrome a little bit.
She was dressing a certain way, talking a certain way,
in order to fit in that chameleon effect.
And she's now championing for women why they don't want to do that.

(42:30):
And why they shouldn't have to do that.
And to listen to her just stories,
I feel like she just has so many stories and experiences.
We can all draw from and learn from.
I think for me watching as a woman in the NBA,
another woman have a guy lean in, right,
and say, we want to have you try this, right?

(42:51):
That's what happened to me.
I have so many male bosses that said you should try this.
Or we're going to pull you over here and move you to a different department division.
You will be really great at this.
Sometimes you forget it's okay to champion for yourself.
And hearing her remind us of that,
that you have to raise your hand, you have to lean in,
and you have to champion for yourself,
or you're going to miss opportunities.
Yeah, no, I loved it.

(43:12):
I thought it was such a good interview and for her,
just like the young girls that watch her show,
like young women, like to look up to her and see what she's done in her career.
And literally nothing is impossible.
You can write a book if you want.
You can be on air for the biggest networks,
or you can just be on a ranch, which is so cool, like in and itself.
So I can't wait to meet up with her in Vegas.
It'll be so much fun.

(43:33):
I know. I feel like our roundtable with Tina's vodka is going to be fantastic.
When we sit there and just break out the stories,
I think it's going to be great.
But thank you guys so much for joining.
We hope you enjoyed Bonnie Jill, amazing human being,
trailblazing woman, perfect guest for us here at her table.
We'll see you guys next week.
Make sure you like, subscribe, and let us know who you want to see next.

(43:55):
We'll see you guys soon.
[BELL RINGS]
[Bell]
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