Chrysalis Advantage: Reframing Midlife as a Season of Becoming

 In this insightful episode of Her Unshakeable Confidence, Simone and Olivia talk with Tami Jorden — certified death doula, co-founder of the Legacy 22 Women’s Circle, and creator of the Chrysalis Advantage. Tami reframes midlife not as decline but as a powerful season of becoming, where earned wisdom, courage, and community open the door to fresh purpose.

She walks us through the core pillars of the Chrysalis Advantage (confidence, courage, spiritual connection, service, community, legacy), shares how working as a death doula shapes her perspective on regret and action, and offers practical ways women can prepare for and thrive in this next chapter.

If you’ve ever feared aging, felt “over” at fifty, or carried a secret you never named — this episode will invite you to step forward, tell your story, edit what no longer serves you, and use your life experience as fuel for connection and service.



✅ Actionable Takeaways

• Trust the Internal Signal — Move your sense of worth from external approval to internal self-trust.
• Do It Messy — Action creates momentum: “step into the chasm” and the next step appears.
• Turn Hard Things into Jewels — Ask “What’s the lesson?” and carry learning forward as usable wisdom.
• Build Your Community — Invest in reciprocal relationships; friendships matter as much as physical health.
• Honor Mortality to Unlock Courage — Memento mori can help you act now so you don’t leave with regrets.
• Edit Deliberately — Let go of people, tasks, and thoughts that no longer serve. 

⏱️ Chapters

00:00 — Introduction
00:28 — Meet Tami Jorden & the Chrysalis Advantage (intro)
05:56 — The six pillars: self-confidence, courage, spiritual connection, service, community, legacy
10:36 — Parenting transitions, off-ramps, and re-discovering purpose
16:31 — Cultural attitudes about aging and the value of elders
21:14 — Intergenerational learning, hobbies, and reclaiming “grandma knowledge”
26:03 — Beauty standards, body image, and what we teach the next generations
33:46 — Tami’s death-doula perspective: memento mori and how it fuels courage
36:32 — Regret, suffering needlessly, and how to avoid both
39:14 — Personal healing: naming trauma, telling your story, and reclaiming power
45:43 — Tami’s word for 2025: Edit — pruning people, tasks, thoughts


✨ About Tami Jorden
Tami Jorden is a certified death doula, coach, and women’s-work facilitator focused on reframing midlife as a season of transformation. She is the creator of the Chrysalis Advantage — a roadmap for women to move through midlife with clarity, courage, and purpose — and a co-founder of the Legacy 22 Women’s Circle. Tami brings a unique perspective informed by her death-doula practice: facing mortality (memento mori) often unlocks the courage to take the steps that matter now, reducing regret and increasing meaning.

Her work centers on six pillars: building internal self-confidence, practicing courageous truth-telling, cultivating spiritual connection (as each woman defines it), contributing through external service, investing in community, and actively shaping one’s legacy. Tami also emphasizes practical service and volunteering as powerful ways to stay connected and purposeful in midlife.

Tami writes and publishes the Substack Butterfly Days, and she’s launching a podcast also called Butterfly Days that explores menopause and midlife as a chrysalis for growth. She volunteers with organizations such as Houston Hospice and Ronald McDonald House, and encourages women to “edit” their lives intentionally — pruning what no longer serves and choosing what to keep.


Connect with Tami Jorden:

Substack - Butterfly Days
Website - tamijorden.com
LinkedIn:  Tamara Jorden


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