How Do We Deal?! Coping With the Confounding

How Do We Deal?! Coping With the Confounding

We're all struggling with the unbearable weight of issues that society just can't seem to solve—while paying endless bills, making infinity dinners, and replying to inane work emails. So how do we deal? With some colorful and transparent commentary from hosts Dara and Amber, and helpful insights from occasional guestsperts. Trump's second term has only made the theme more relevant since the podcast began. Friends of different backgrounds from the same Boston suburb, Dara and Amber inevitably dive deep into meaningful conversation, whether they're shooting around on the basketball court or sipping Sauvignon Blanc. In each episode of "How Do We Deal: Coping with the Confounding," they attempt to make sense of simply existing in the world today, at the nexus of massive conundrums (from the rise of fascism, to deeply rooted racism to the mental health to climate change crises) and everyday responsibilities and challenges (maintaining faith in humanity while in rush hour traffic with kids, for example). Sometimes talking it all through is enough to help find some hope, calm, and clarity. With honesty and openness about their own experiences with everything from race and neurodivergence to parenting and balling, they want to share the conversation with you. The goal is simply to make each day a little better.

Episodes

March 14, 2025 37 mins
As parents who often feel like they worry too much, or not enough, or have no idea what they're doing, Dara and Amber were thrillled to connect with the woman dubbed “America’s Worst Mom” only to flip it into a positive movement. Lenore Skenazy sure had a lot of deal with after unleashing a media firestorm with her 2008 column, “Why I Let My 9-Year-Old Ride the Subway Alone." But she didn't apologize or back down. Instead, Lenore h...
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Dara and Amber often chat about the crime and violence in the news, but it's hard to grasp. Are we too worried due to 24/7 media alarmism? Not worried enough? Is violence crime rising or falling? What causes all the violence in our society, anyway? They were lucky enough to get some answers from a special guest: criminologist and professor Dr. Mark A. Winton, who gave fascinating insights on violentization theory as a basis for how...
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February 26, 2025 34 mins
We're back! And our podcast title is more relevant than ever. Dara and Amber talk about how they're dealing with and resisting the dismantling of democracy, and how history and the universe are providing much needed perspective in the midst of confounding events. 

Episode links:

- https://www.discoveryplus.com/... series
- https://podcasts.apple.com/us/.../28 Economic Blackout
- https://thepeoplesunionusa.com... way down on the Peo...
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Dara and Amber call Ebony their icon of positivity, guru of self-care, and Vitamin E, because of the boost her presence provides! So they brought her on the podcast to find out just how she keeps her light so uhnbelievably bright. As always, Ebony delivered, with insights on how positivity is a choice (not always easy, even for her), tips on improving self-talk, and so much more. 

Dara met her at work, where Ebony rose from administ...
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Get ready to treat your ears and heart. Dara and Amber are huge fans of the alternative, dreamy pop songs of Amanda Zorzi, the Philly-based songwriter/independent artist who generously created the theme song for this podcast! But they're even bigger fans of her as a human. Amanda is a certified music therapist, foster mom to dogs in need of homes, and a professional advocate for neuro-inclusive workplaces (a path that connected her...
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Dara and Amber have wanted Michael Henry on the pod since day one. Partly because a legal mind is needed to make sense of, and deal with, confounding gun and abortion laws. But also because his perspective is uniquely insightful. Before Michael was a health sciences lawyer (and for a few years, Dara's colleague), he was an NCIS Special Agent serving in the Middle East and East Africa. With his military bonafides and roots in Texas ...
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Struggling to deal with the loss of their husbands, one to the trap of addiction and one to a shockingly sudden death, Nicole and Suzanne connected and soon bonded over wine and karaoke. In this refreshingly candid "How Do We Deal?!" chat, they share how their friendship, forged out of grief and sustained by humor, helps them manage and embrace their lives as solo parents. Suzanne and Nicole give their hilarious and insightful take...
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In this special episode recorded in Mexico during a trip to see Dave Matthews and Tim Reynolds, Dara interviews fellow DMB super fan and podcast host Renae Lipsmeyer. On "The Space Between Podcast," with close to 100 episodes released, Renae tells the story of DMB fans and how the band has been transforming and enriching lives for over 30 years. In her conversation with Dara, Renae shares her own journey, including how podcasting a...
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Our friend Bernard Grant, Ph.D. is many things, all of them remarkable. Multiply neurodivergent, they are an Autistic advocate, life coach to Autistics and parents seeking insight from an Autistic person on how better to support their Autistic children, neurodiversity trainer, award-winning writer of fiction and essays, and talented editor. To say that our conversation opened our eyes and minds would be the understatement of the ce...
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This is the second and final part of Dara and Amber's powerful discussion Monica Jones, our childhood friend and an incredibly strong and kind human. She shares what it's like to deal with a terminal diagnosis, metastatic (Stage IV) breast cancer, and reflects on defying the odds for almost a decade. In this episode, you'll also hear about her hopes and boundless love for her daughter, how this diagnosis has shaped relationships, w...
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F*CK CANCER. In part 1 of 2 in the ultimate "How Do We Deal?!" discussion, we welcome childhood friend (from our Massachusetts hometown) and certified badass Monica Jones, who has been living with metastatic (Stage IV) breast cancer for over nine years. During that time, she became a parent, defied odds and expectations, and jumped into fierce, much-needed advocacy to help address the most deadly type of breast cancer, which is sev...
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March 7, 2024 40 mins
Dara and Amber are back, bae-bae! In the season 2 intro episode, they get hyped and give a preview of the issues and guestperts coming up on the podcast. This season brings a new format by welcoming friends with unique experiences and expertise that can give us all insight on how to deal. Join our hosts as they look forward to the discussions ahead, sharing thoughts, questions and a few laughs on everything from fitness habits to t...
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May 18, 2023 32 mins
In the season 1 finale, Dara and Amber look back, and forward, talking about the experience of podcasting, how they've dealt with the vulnerability, what they've learned, and the feedback they've received. As your hosts look to season 2, they prepare to welcome guestperts to tackle important topics, including everything from gun violence to self care. Hear about how it's gone, what the podcast and the listeners they call "Dealers" ...
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May 11, 2023 30 mins
What is normal? It depends. But as podcasters, our new normal is getting positive, fun, and relevant input from our Dealers! In the course of day-to-day life, "normal" means something different to Dara and Amber. As the neurodivergent parent of an autistic child, Amber assumed the idea of "normal" was oppressive and bad. Dara realizes how important "normal" was to her, while growing up, as a survival tactic. Staying in the middle o...
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May 4, 2023 28 mins
Dara and Amber realize that while stereotypes divide us, they're also how our brains make sense of a fast-moving, diverse world. So how do we deal? By pausing to reflect on the assumptions we make, and the limits we place on the fullness of others' being. Dara and Amber explore input from our listeners (whom we lovingly refer to as "Dealers") on the stereotypes they face in their own lives. Your hosts also realize that they hold di...
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April 27, 2023 29 mins
Social media can connect us across miles and years. But it’s also implicated in harming mental health–and the Senate is currently considering a ban for kids under 13. It's part of our lives, for better or worse, so how do we deal? Dara chooses to share and see the sunny side–emphasizing that obviously no one’s life is perfect–while keeping tabs on people she loves and is inspired by. Amber has finally learned to stop engaging in po...
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April 19, 2023 26 mins
Anxiety is on the rise–and with all that’s going on, it’s no wonder. But we can’t let anxiety own us, so how do we deal? Dara slyly tries to skirt-skirt the issue, then dives in to realize how she gets angry to avoid feeling out of control. Amber’s life was absolutely ruled by anxiety–until motherhood led to an epiphany, medication, and change. A catchphrase from Dara’s mentor (“live lightly”) helps crystallize the issue in brillia...
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April 14, 2023 44 mins
We stayed out until the street lights came on. We went from typewriters to computers and we were the original hose influencers. "Parenting" wasn't even a verb when we were kids. Now we, Generation X, are parents of the Gen Zers and Alphas. There are no clear-cut rules except you must watch your children at all times! You must strategize and enforce screen time limits on ever present iPads and tablets. So how do we deal with parenti...
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April 6, 2023 24 mins
How do we deal with aging? It happens to every single one of us, if we're lucky. The alternative to aging is not something anybody would choose, yet we invest money, effort and energy into fighting it. Join us to hear about faces melting like candles, an optometrist trip leading to temporary readers--that immediately became permanent, the demise of happy hours, the rise of silver foxes, and our decision to have a gray off.
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April 1, 2023 11 mins
April Fools! We’re taking a step back from the seriousness of the world to have a few laughs with you! We talk about Amber’s last name destiny. We hear Dara’s youngest child tell a joke. Dara and Amber’s outtakes and some hometown friends who keep us laughing!
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