February 13, 2024 • 29 mins
Dr. Elsbeth Meuth and Freddy Zental Weaver have assisted thousands of couples and singles create lasting intimacy and fulfillment in their life and relationships. They are featured on Showtime’s documentary series Sexual Healing andthe Emmy Award-winning NBC show Starting Over, best-selling authors of Sexual Enlightenment endorsed by world-renowned Spiritual Pioneer Dr. Michael Beckwith, and the co-founders of TantraNova Institute in Chicago. They have coached billionaires, innovators and power couples all over the world, shared their intimacy secrets at a global YPO (Young Presidents Organization) conference in the city of love, Paris, and got nominated as Changemaker at the White House sponsored 2016 United State of Women Summit in Washington, D.C. Elsbeth and Freddy Zental are beloveds, husband & wife as well as business partners residing in Chicago.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Block Told Radio Block Told Radio Hi everyone, and welcome
back to Insight into Hearing. My name is Alexa Servovideo
nine your hosts, and I'm so excited for the show tonight.
We're going to be having a special pre Valentine's Day
(00:22):
special edition of Insight into Healing tonight. On the line,
we have doctor elswith Muys. I'm Freddie sentel Weaver. They've
insisted a thousands of couples and singles creating lasting intimacy
and fulfillment in their lives and relationships. They are featured
on Showtime documentary Theories, Sexual Healing and All for the
(00:46):
Emmy Award winning NBC show Starting Over. They are best
selling authors of sexual enlightenment that have been endorsed by
the world renowned spiritual pioneer doctor Michael Beckwith and the
both founders of Tancer and Nova Institute in Chicago. They
have coached billionaires, innovators, and power couples all over the world,
(01:10):
shared the intimacy secrets of the Global YPO Young President's
Organization Conference in the City of Love, Paris, and got
nominated as change Maker at the White House sponsored twenty
sixteen United States of Women from it in Washington, d
c Elsbeth and Freddie Zentel are beloved husband and wife
(01:32):
as well as business partners resided in Chicago. Welcome to
insight into Heley Andrews. So excited to have you on.
Thank you so much for coming on the show tonight.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Thank you Alexa for having us.
Speaker 3 (01:45):
It's great to be here. Thanks so much, Alexa.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Absolutely, and what perfect timing with Valentine's Day coming up.
So many singles, so many couples always feel as this pressure,
especially this time of year, to really have that perfect night,
to have that perfect relationship. And I find so many
times putting all this pressure to also impact the quality
(02:12):
of their interaction, the dynamics of their relationship. What have
you found around this time and also with singles and couples.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
In general, Oh, there's lots what we have found. So
of course Valentine's Day calls us into bringing awareness to
love and intimacy, and then we may be challenged or
it may be a most glorious stay, depending on where
we are in our life and in relationship or not
(02:41):
in relationship. However, it always burns comes down to not
burns down to it comes down to you know, how
connected we are with ourselves, because even in relationship, it
starts out with me being connected with myself. If I'm
not intimately conned with myself, I cannot connect with ready centall.
(03:04):
You know. So, and if I'm single, and I started
out my journey into creating intimacy and love consciously as
a single person because I was quite despaired, like twenty
five years ago, I really wanted to learn more about
what the ingredients are for creating intimacy and love and
(03:28):
not just falling into it, which may feel great. However,
when I fall for one thing, it may hurt either
right away a little later. And most importantly, I don't
know what I did when I've felt good. You know,
when I'm in love, which is wonderful. And we are
(03:50):
not saying not to fall in love. However, how would
it be to learn the distinctions and practices to create
intimacy and love consciously within with the loved beloved within
and then a beloved outside.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
It's so important, as you brought up, and so many
times people think it might be cliche, but it's important
to have that intimacy that bond with yourself, with your
own self and being able to know yourself to love
yourself and know what you're looking for in others, but
also to know what you have. How does one find
(04:32):
that because so many times people think there's this exact protocol,
but I think for each person, I would say it
probably has to be different and also not so stringent
that they'd have to be more vulnerable and open to
which might be hard to do and also a little
frightening at times.
Speaker 3 (04:48):
Well, you know what's wonderful, Electa, this is Freddy Zentheal,
is that through the practices of working consciously with sexual energy,
we are led back to what I call we've forgotten
right because we know this place of stillness and this
listening to ourselves. It's just, you know, because we start
out we're in the womb. It's womb service, it's great.
And then we're born and you know, bright lights whacked
(05:08):
in the bottom. Some guys are getting their wee weize cutting.
You're thinking sending me back. And then life happens, all
this good and bad, and then we get to a
point in our life where we want to create something
that we've never experienced before, or that comes and goes
like love or you know, intimacy, and so you know,
we just getting out of who we have. You know,
we look into the world from these experiences to move
(05:31):
towards what we most deeply desire is a process that
is led back to for us through bringing consciousness to
the sexual and that's what we've been teaching for the
last twenty three years all over the world and teaching
these practices that really just lead people back through the
altered state of the sexual with specific distinctions of breath awareness,
(05:52):
energy awareness, and intention like I want to create this
thing that I'm wanting in my life. We get more unmasked,
this intimate vulnerability, more in the sexual energy. Whether we're
doing consciousness work or not, we're more open, loving, vulnerable, receptive. Chemically,
we're changed more indoor from serotonin, oxytocin, the feel good hormones,
so we're in an altered state. So working with that
(06:14):
already altered state to get more connected to the subconscious
aspects of our being this to then start moving with
great season flow towards this thing we most deeply desire.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
Yes, what would you say to someone because a lot
of times people might feel uncomfortable talking about, you know,
their sexual being. How they would define themselves? How would
someone work through that, or what would you say to them?
I said, oh, you know, I was brought up never
to really speak about that, or I don't feel comfortable.
(06:47):
How would one start with that? What would you do?
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Yeah? I would stop And that is how we stopped.
Was you know, working with our clients and students is
to actually just ditinguished between sex and sexual energy, because
sexual energy is life was energy. It runs through each
of us all the time. At this very moment, we
(07:11):
wouldn't be alive without it. We most of us are
not aware of it, you know, unless we touch our palwals,
we are not aware of that life was running through us. However,
it's ever present, and that energy is sexual in nature.
(07:31):
It's creative. It doesn't have to show up in a
sexual way like an aroused way. And sexual energy, given
that its life was energy, is more like you know,
like playing a flute at the low level. It's we
call it the subtle energy. Right now, we are all
(07:54):
in our subtle energy. At least I assume nobody is
aroused right now. So anyway, so we are listening, we
are reflective. I'm speaking, and then when I walk at
Lake Michigan in the summer, and the breeze touches my skin.
(08:17):
It feels very pleasant. I'm not highly aroused yet, the
energy has risen a little bit, and then of course
all the way to the high arousal that leads potentially
to the climax or the ejaculation. But that is so
much in between of the subtle state to the aroused state,
(08:40):
you know, and we want to learn to connect with
these different levels. So in the learning about that, of
course we will face if there's something in the way
around the sexual you know, if we were brought up
that touching my sexual center is sinful, or you know,
(09:02):
I shouldn't go there until I am married, so I'm
doing something wrong if I do it. Anyway, if that
is in the way, we want to clear that because
that not only impedes our sexual joy and pleasure, it
impedes our life force enalty being alive. You know.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
Let me add to just in terms of the question
of how do we how does someone get past a
belief that that's a bad thing or that they were
you know, model it it's just you know, not a
good thing, you know, uh, sexual self. The fundamental piece
that is learned through our practices is this self awareness
practice of what we call the witness or the observer,
(09:44):
and that's done through breath and some other practices, but
it's being able to watch our story, our beliefs with
sort of a curious witness of ourselves to move with
graces and flow towards this thing we want to create,
because it is typically when we feel something and we
believe something, it's in our body, it's in our neurosystem,
it's a total felt sense. So being this witness of
(10:08):
all of that allows us to what I call flatten
the impact of these old stories, to move towards this dream,
this idea of something that we've never created before. And
that's one of the things that really has been very
successful for us in working with people and getting to
themselves and what they want to create and bring in.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
Yeah, also as to the fear that we don't lead
people right to the aroused sexual energy, you know, at
first they want to explore what their subtle enalgy feels like,
you know, enalg life was. Enalgy goes hand in hand
with the brath. There's a term in yoga and the
(10:50):
yogic practice which is prana, and prana means energetic braths.
So they have one word, where we have two words
for that combination. Actually they are one because if we
don't breathe, we die. It's rather obvious. So if they
go together and dying, they must go together when we
are alive. So we want to become aware of the
(11:14):
energy that runs through us, that subtle energy, And initially
there is nothing being confronted. It's more like becoming aware
of that beautiful flow of energy that we can, like
to the flow of our blood through the arteries and veins.
Energy runs through the grid of the nervous system, So
(11:37):
we become more aware of that. And then how energy
shows up within a human being, you know, on the
physical level, like sensations on the emotional level, emotions on
the mental level, showing up as thoughts. Sensations, emotions, and
thoughts are all frequencies. They are not matter. We cannot
(11:59):
touch them, they cannot see them. However they may have
us or they may even run the show. And so
in the process of this subtle NLC exploration, we get
to become more familiar with ourselves.
Speaker 3 (12:17):
Yeah, the emotional awareness practices that we lead people through
really prepare them to develop further this witness to move
again with gracies and flow towards this thing that they've
written down as an intention to create in their life.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
Yes, and it's so empowering because you know what you
were saying before about about these stories that people sometimes
define themselves or define their beings so much of that
sometimes that negative lens that they see life through, but
they see themselves through and they don't realize that also
transmutes into their energy that they're conscious of it or not.
(12:56):
And it's really important that you are bringing them back
to that that's date of observing, of witnessing, but also
being open and being able to sort of pull back
all these other veils and lenses that people have through
life to be able to connect to that energy. Because
I think it's so important to be able to have
that stillness, to be able to start recognizing your energy
(13:19):
and having that really lead you and guide you in
so many kinds of these negative narratives I find with
a lot of clients that they take over. But it's
so empowering to be able to let these moments take
over and that really guides you.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
Yeah, and it's so important to create a safe space,
you know, because that's the only place where we allow
ourselves to open up, to open into vulnerability, and not
vulnerability as a weakness, no, vulnerability as the capacity to feel,
(13:57):
to allow ourselves to feel the whole grammut of feelings,
you know, the feelings we may not like so much,
we may want to go away from, to learn to
go towards it, because if I try to go away
from them, they actually you know, sustain So if I
go towards that discomfort, you know, towards the jealousy, towards
(14:23):
the loneness, there is a possibility for moving through the
eye of the needle. And then there's another side.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
It's like, what practices can we learn, tools we can
garner to shift the narrative, the beliefs because we experience
these things and that becomes our truth. You know, if
your parents told you something, or we reacted to something
at an early age and appropriated a way of being,
that becomes our truth, our only way of seeing something.
(14:52):
So until we can develop this curious witness of ourselves,
you know, this watcher to move towards this idea what
we want create, can we only then move and shift
our experience.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
Let's also just shair with the listener that how we
may get there because that the world we are talking about.
The opportunity in the work is really to connect with
the whole being, the body, you know, the emotion and
(15:26):
our narratives, our interpretation, and our spiritual or consciousness self.
And it's based in the Eastern practice of tantra, and
tantra yoga is the yoga of the enougetic body, unlike
the form of yoga we are most familiar with in
(15:46):
the West, which is the yoga, yeah, the yoga of half,
the yoga of the physical body. So we tap into
our inatic body in Tantra joba, and that really includes
also the energy of the sexual, the energy of the creative,
(16:11):
the life giving energy, and become aware of that so
that we can guide that beautiful energy and have it
fuel our love, our heart, our thoughts, our focus, you know.
So both for expanding love with self and then expanding
(16:34):
love with another and connecting what we call the integration
of the sexual spiritual.
Speaker 1 (16:44):
That's very powerful. And I work with a lot of
couples where there has been obviously jealousy, but there's also
been because of maybe there's been an infidelity. How do
you work with couples or what would you say because
I know so many times we feel like I can
never get through this, or how do I move past
this to be able to get back to that vulnerable stake,
(17:07):
almost that excitement state of being together with that person
again when there's been either jealousy or infidelity. Have you
experienced that?
Speaker 3 (17:17):
Absolutely? It's a powerful, you know emotion for people to feel,
you know, jealousy and feel cheated or allied to to see.
What's important though, and most important is if they both
have a desire to move past it, there is hope. Now.
The first piece to this emotional awareness exercise that we
(17:39):
teach is the breathing, and I can share this with
your listeners. It'll take about twenty seconds, okay, so if
you're listened. So if your listeners can sit up as
straight as there can be comfortably in their seating and
put a hand on their belly. Their eyes can be
open closed or soft focus. And I want you to
breathe into your nose, down your trachia, extending into the diaphragm,
which will extend the belle as you inhale and feel
(18:01):
your hand and the belly extend into your hand and
on your exhalation, consciously contracting the belly towards the spine,
following your breath with your awareness up and out through
your nose and your own pace, depth and rhythm. Continue
breathing like that. I'm going to keep saying a few
things now. For most of us, we can do this
for about three breaths before our mind gets busy. So
when you drift and you get distracted, don't engage. Just
(18:25):
bring your awareness back to your breath. Following your breath
with your awareness into your nose, down your trachea, lungs
extending into your diaphragm and belly like a big balloon
on your inhalation, following with your awareness your breath back
up and out through your nose and your own pace,
depth and rhythm. Just one more breath like that, beautiful,
(18:53):
and open your eyes and come on back to the show.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
And notice how you feel right now, Notice how you
feel your body, how you feel emotionally, and perhaps Alexa,
you can just chanil to how you feel.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
Yes, I just felt a huge difference. What was the
word lighter and brighter came to me, but also calmer
and just very aware of being in the moment and
being very present, but feeling peaceful about it.
Speaker 3 (19:25):
That's beautiful because that's the first piece, because it's in
that moment of just watching our thoughts just for a moment,
that's the space, that's the pause that's needed to get
away from, you know, the anger about the infidelity, about that.
There's no possibility about all the story making we do
about this thing that happened, not to diminish the impact
(19:46):
of it. It's just something that happened in the past,
you know. And so but we live it now into
the future and we can't see anything out. So that
practice continues to expand its space as we continue to
do it, to watch just watching the thoughts of what
we call it without what we call the total felt
sense of the thought, which is the feeling, the belief,
the neurosystem, engage the heart, and everything's engaged when we
(20:10):
start to continue to engage in that conversation. So that
witnessing is really important, and then we build on that.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
Yeah, So the conscious valley bread that Freddie just guided
us through allows us to actually tap into the very state, Alexa,
that you described a moment ago, how you are feeling
upon completion of the practice, and from that place we
can look and see versus just to react, and so
(20:42):
of course it needs to be cultivated. Doing it once
it's not doing the trick. So we want to cultivate
that so that we can drop into a state of
calm and peace and live and bright. And then from
they look at what goes on for me, And so
(21:04):
the one who perpetrate it and the one who feels betrayed,
they can look at what is there for them. So
we use the body, we use the brath to create
a different state in the nervous system that allows us
to get a little distance. Doesn't mean that the jealousy,
(21:25):
that the anger, the sense of betrayal is gone. However,
we can just look at it versus fully being it
like it has us instead of us having it. And
that is what we want to cultivate further and in
the process, and you know that it's usually through a
(21:48):
program a couple may come to it's more conducive if
something of that seriousness happens to do private work with us.
They are also invited to do our workshops. But in
private work we can just move much more in a
much more customized way that each of the two of
(22:10):
them in their coighborhood get to see their own part
and get to cultivate that sense of being a listener
and watcher of themselves, and that lowers the charge that
we have them. Then, and when the charge is lowered,
(22:31):
I can start listening to my partner from a different place.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
You know.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
That doesn't mean that he is right now and I'm wrong.
It's not about that. It is that I can see that,
I can hear that, I can learn what may be
over there, and I can share openly, perhaps my hurt,
my deep disappointment, perhaps a sense of hopelessness, and that
(22:59):
there is room. And then when that is established, we
guide them into condric partner work that allows them to
connect heart to horrid instead of hat to hat. What
I mean by that is like being in our head
and being self righteous. They drop into the hord and
(23:22):
from there the heart opens and the connection can get
slowly and slowly, you know, re established. And when that's
re established, we then can also move towards the sexual
but that may take a while.
Speaker 1 (23:40):
And you said three really important words that stuck out
to me is the distance, listening, and to witness. They're
all active in different ways, but I think so many
times people see them as such easy things, but really
when you practice the distance from the event, then you're
(24:03):
able to listen, to really be able to hear and
to see, and you're more of a witness than of
an active participant in that moment because so many times
people are in that site slight or freeze heightened state,
and the breathing has physically, medically been proven to calm
the mind and the body down that are connected. We
(24:26):
can't have our mind and body over stimulated and say, Okay,
I'm here, I'm ready to hear you. No, you're in
that heightened state. So the breathing brings you down, so
your ears are open, your eyes are open.
Speaker 3 (24:37):
Yeah, breathing is you say, prepare sympathetic breathing particularly more
indoor fin serotonin, oxytocin, the feel good hormone, So you're
actually putting yourself in a chemical state of ease breeding
that way, unlike sympathetic breathing, where we breathe in the
upper chest, but when we bring it consciously in a
diaphem and belly, that's the thing that really starts to
develop that pause that we're talking about. Now. Once someone
(24:59):
comes in and they're starting they have this issue and
they maybe go through a you know, part of the
process of getting to what they want is going through
their maybe cathartic exorcism of you know, the experience, and
then this process is breathing and the witness and then
to start how you want to feel. And once they
can just let go of the impact of the experience
(25:23):
and imagine how they want to feel, that starts to
become their truth, their neurosynaptic They're rewiring their neurosystem to
a familiarity of what they want to create, and that
becomes more and more accessible and available as the practices
go on. And then when we work, when we get
to the point where they're working with the sexual meditation again,
(25:45):
that's already going to lead you to an ultra state
working with the sex.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
You have to be ready for that.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
Yes see, well we're getting towards the end of the show.
Where can my listeners find your books, follow you, come
to your workshops, come a client. What would be the
next step?
Speaker 2 (26:04):
Yeah, so the very next step is to pick up
our gift that we want to give everyone who is
listening to the show. It's called Introduction to Sexual Meditation.
And we thought out of the conversation today that it
would be great if we could give you practices that
(26:30):
you can bring into your life right away, just like
that conscious ballet brass, that parasympathetic breathing. There's another practice
in that video class that will allow you to connect
with the energy channel that moves on the base of
(26:50):
the spine to the top of the head and then
move the energy back down again. How to open that
channel and so that you can really take this conversation
into your life in a very practical way. So if
you like to pick that up, Alexi, assume it's going
(27:11):
to be in the show notes the link.
Speaker 1 (27:14):
Yes, yes, I'll put the show. I will definitely put
it in the link where the you, the listeners can
get your free copy of free gift. Thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
Yeah, and then.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
Afterwards to to see what other people have learned from
from your gift.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
What.
Speaker 1 (27:34):
I would definitely love to have you guys back on
again because I know so many people are going to
want to reach out to and say what about this.
They're going to be very excited.
Speaker 3 (27:44):
We'd love to come back.
Speaker 2 (27:45):
Yes, that would be great, exciting.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Great. And also your book your books are on Amazon.
There's an e book.
Speaker 2 (27:56):
Yeah, it's so sexual inlightenment.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
Great, right, and is there also a website to the show,
but just so they know that there are websites that
they can.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Tantranova dot com, t A n t r A n
O v A dot com and there are all our
workshops and programs and whatever you want to look about us.
And then of course you know you as a listener,
you are invited to also to schedule your complimentary conversation
(28:36):
with us to learn more how all of this may
apply to you, to your situation, and we'd love to
support you in it.
Speaker 1 (28:48):
Absolutely well. Thank you so much for coming on the
show tonight and really providing us all with such an
incredible opportunity to actually to find us ourselves again, to
find our inter being again, and also being able to
connect with ourselves but also how to connect with those
that we love, and that that's a gift that just
(29:10):
keeps on giving.
Speaker 3 (29:13):
Thanks for your work too, Alexa, Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (29:16):
Thank you, thank you, I get everyone, Thank you so
much for tuning in. If you have any questions, please
send an email to Insight into Healing at gmail dot com.
And everyone. Thank you so much. Everyone, have a good night,
and God bless
Block Told Radio Block Told Radio Hi everyone, and welcome
back to Insight into Hearing. My name is Alexa Servovideo
nine your hosts, and I'm so excited for the show tonight.
We're going to be having a special pre Valentine's Day
(00:22):
special edition of Insight into Healing tonight. On the line,
we have doctor elswith Muys. I'm Freddie sentel Weaver. They've
insisted a thousands of couples and singles creating lasting intimacy
and fulfillment in their lives and relationships. They are featured
on Showtime documentary Theories, Sexual Healing and All for the
(00:46):
Emmy Award winning NBC show Starting Over. They are best
selling authors of sexual enlightenment that have been endorsed by
the world renowned spiritual pioneer doctor Michael Beckwith and the
both founders of Tancer and Nova Institute in Chicago. They
have coached billionaires, innovators, and power couples all over the world,
(01:10):
shared the intimacy secrets of the Global YPO Young President's
Organization Conference in the City of Love, Paris, and got
nominated as change Maker at the White House sponsored twenty
sixteen United States of Women from it in Washington, d
c Elsbeth and Freddie Zentel are beloved husband and wife
(01:32):
as well as business partners resided in Chicago. Welcome to
insight into Heley Andrews. So excited to have you on.
Thank you so much for coming on the show tonight.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Thank you Alexa for having us.
Speaker 3 (01:45):
It's great to be here. Thanks so much, Alexa.
Speaker 1 (01:48):
Absolutely, and what perfect timing with Valentine's Day coming up.
So many singles, so many couples always feel as this pressure,
especially this time of year, to really have that perfect night,
to have that perfect relationship. And I find so many
times putting all this pressure to also impact the quality
(02:12):
of their interaction, the dynamics of their relationship. What have
you found around this time and also with singles and couples.
Speaker 2 (02:19):
In general, Oh, there's lots what we have found. So
of course Valentine's Day calls us into bringing awareness to
love and intimacy, and then we may be challenged or
it may be a most glorious stay, depending on where
we are in our life and in relationship or not
(02:41):
in relationship. However, it always burns comes down to not
burns down to it comes down to you know, how
connected we are with ourselves, because even in relationship, it
starts out with me being connected with myself. If I'm
not intimately conned with myself, I cannot connect with ready centall.
(03:04):
You know. So, and if I'm single, and I started
out my journey into creating intimacy and love consciously as
a single person because I was quite despaired, like twenty
five years ago, I really wanted to learn more about
what the ingredients are for creating intimacy and love and
(03:28):
not just falling into it, which may feel great. However,
when I fall for one thing, it may hurt either
right away a little later. And most importantly, I don't
know what I did when I've felt good. You know,
when I'm in love, which is wonderful. And we are
(03:50):
not saying not to fall in love. However, how would
it be to learn the distinctions and practices to create
intimacy and love consciously within with the loved beloved within
and then a beloved outside.
Speaker 1 (04:11):
It's so important, as you brought up, and so many
times people think it might be cliche, but it's important
to have that intimacy that bond with yourself, with your
own self and being able to know yourself to love
yourself and know what you're looking for in others, but
also to know what you have. How does one find
(04:32):
that because so many times people think there's this exact protocol,
but I think for each person, I would say it
probably has to be different and also not so stringent
that they'd have to be more vulnerable and open to
which might be hard to do and also a little
frightening at times.
Speaker 3 (04:48):
Well, you know what's wonderful, Electa, this is Freddy Zentheal,
is that through the practices of working consciously with sexual energy,
we are led back to what I call we've forgotten
right because we know this place of stillness and this
listening to ourselves. It's just, you know, because we start
out we're in the womb. It's womb service, it's great.
And then we're born and you know, bright lights whacked
(05:08):
in the bottom. Some guys are getting their wee weize cutting.
You're thinking sending me back. And then life happens, all
this good and bad, and then we get to a
point in our life where we want to create something
that we've never experienced before, or that comes and goes
like love or you know, intimacy, and so you know,
we just getting out of who we have. You know,
we look into the world from these experiences to move
(05:31):
towards what we most deeply desire is a process that
is led back to for us through bringing consciousness to
the sexual and that's what we've been teaching for the
last twenty three years all over the world and teaching
these practices that really just lead people back through the
altered state of the sexual with specific distinctions of breath awareness,
(05:52):
energy awareness, and intention like I want to create this
thing that I'm wanting in my life. We get more unmasked,
this intimate vulnerability, more in the sexual energy. Whether we're
doing consciousness work or not, we're more open, loving, vulnerable, receptive. Chemically,
we're changed more indoor from serotonin, oxytocin, the feel good hormones,
so we're in an altered state. So working with that
(06:14):
already altered state to get more connected to the subconscious
aspects of our being this to then start moving with
great season flow towards this thing we most deeply desire.
Speaker 1 (06:26):
Yes, what would you say to someone because a lot
of times people might feel uncomfortable talking about, you know,
their sexual being. How they would define themselves? How would
someone work through that, or what would you say to them?
I said, oh, you know, I was brought up never
to really speak about that, or I don't feel comfortable.
(06:47):
How would one start with that? What would you do?
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Yeah? I would stop And that is how we stopped.
Was you know, working with our clients and students is
to actually just ditinguished between sex and sexual energy, because
sexual energy is life was energy. It runs through each
of us all the time. At this very moment, we
(07:11):
wouldn't be alive without it. We most of us are
not aware of it, you know, unless we touch our palwals,
we are not aware of that life was running through us. However,
it's ever present, and that energy is sexual in nature.
(07:31):
It's creative. It doesn't have to show up in a
sexual way like an aroused way. And sexual energy, given
that its life was energy, is more like you know,
like playing a flute at the low level. It's we
call it the subtle energy. Right now, we are all
(07:54):
in our subtle energy. At least I assume nobody is
aroused right now. So anyway, so we are listening, we
are reflective. I'm speaking, and then when I walk at
Lake Michigan in the summer, and the breeze touches my skin.
(08:17):
It feels very pleasant. I'm not highly aroused yet, the
energy has risen a little bit, and then of course
all the way to the high arousal that leads potentially
to the climax or the ejaculation. But that is so
much in between of the subtle state to the aroused state,
(08:40):
you know, and we want to learn to connect with
these different levels. So in the learning about that, of
course we will face if there's something in the way
around the sexual you know, if we were brought up
that touching my sexual center is sinful, or you know,
(09:02):
I shouldn't go there until I am married, so I'm
doing something wrong if I do it. Anyway, if that
is in the way, we want to clear that because
that not only impedes our sexual joy and pleasure, it
impedes our life force enalty being alive. You know.
Speaker 3 (09:22):
Let me add to just in terms of the question
of how do we how does someone get past a
belief that that's a bad thing or that they were
you know, model it it's just you know, not a
good thing, you know, uh, sexual self. The fundamental piece
that is learned through our practices is this self awareness
practice of what we call the witness or the observer,
(09:44):
and that's done through breath and some other practices, but
it's being able to watch our story, our beliefs with
sort of a curious witness of ourselves to move with
graces and flow towards this thing we want to create,
because it is typically when we feel something and we
believe something, it's in our body, it's in our neurosystem,
it's a total felt sense. So being this witness of
(10:08):
all of that allows us to what I call flatten
the impact of these old stories, to move towards this dream,
this idea of something that we've never created before. And
that's one of the things that really has been very
successful for us in working with people and getting to
themselves and what they want to create and bring in.
Speaker 2 (10:27):
Yeah, also as to the fear that we don't lead
people right to the aroused sexual energy, you know, at
first they want to explore what their subtle enalgy feels like,
you know, enalg life was. Enalgy goes hand in hand
with the brath. There's a term in yoga and the
(10:50):
yogic practice which is prana, and prana means energetic braths.
So they have one word, where we have two words
for that combination. Actually they are one because if we
don't breathe, we die. It's rather obvious. So if they
go together and dying, they must go together when we
are alive. So we want to become aware of the
(11:14):
energy that runs through us, that subtle energy, And initially
there is nothing being confronted. It's more like becoming aware
of that beautiful flow of energy that we can, like
to the flow of our blood through the arteries and veins.
Energy runs through the grid of the nervous system, So
(11:37):
we become more aware of that. And then how energy
shows up within a human being, you know, on the
physical level, like sensations on the emotional level, emotions on
the mental level, showing up as thoughts. Sensations, emotions, and
thoughts are all frequencies. They are not matter. We cannot
(11:59):
touch them, they cannot see them. However they may have
us or they may even run the show. And so
in the process of this subtle NLC exploration, we get
to become more familiar with ourselves.
Speaker 3 (12:17):
Yeah, the emotional awareness practices that we lead people through
really prepare them to develop further this witness to move
again with gracies and flow towards this thing that they've
written down as an intention to create in their life.
Speaker 1 (12:33):
Yes, and it's so empowering because you know what you
were saying before about about these stories that people sometimes
define themselves or define their beings so much of that
sometimes that negative lens that they see life through, but
they see themselves through and they don't realize that also
transmutes into their energy that they're conscious of it or not.
(12:56):
And it's really important that you are bringing them back
to that that's date of observing, of witnessing, but also
being open and being able to sort of pull back
all these other veils and lenses that people have through
life to be able to connect to that energy. Because
I think it's so important to be able to have
that stillness, to be able to start recognizing your energy
(13:19):
and having that really lead you and guide you in
so many kinds of these negative narratives I find with
a lot of clients that they take over. But it's
so empowering to be able to let these moments take
over and that really guides you.
Speaker 3 (13:34):
Yes.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
Yeah, and it's so important to create a safe space,
you know, because that's the only place where we allow
ourselves to open up, to open into vulnerability, and not
vulnerability as a weakness, no, vulnerability as the capacity to feel,
(13:57):
to allow ourselves to feel the whole grammut of feelings,
you know, the feelings we may not like so much,
we may want to go away from, to learn to
go towards it, because if I try to go away
from them, they actually you know, sustain So if I
go towards that discomfort, you know, towards the jealousy, towards
(14:23):
the loneness, there is a possibility for moving through the
eye of the needle. And then there's another side.
Speaker 3 (14:31):
It's like, what practices can we learn, tools we can
garner to shift the narrative, the beliefs because we experience
these things and that becomes our truth. You know, if
your parents told you something, or we reacted to something
at an early age and appropriated a way of being,
that becomes our truth, our only way of seeing something.
(14:52):
So until we can develop this curious witness of ourselves,
you know, this watcher to move towards this idea what
we want create, can we only then move and shift
our experience.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
Let's also just shair with the listener that how we
may get there because that the world we are talking about.
The opportunity in the work is really to connect with
the whole being, the body, you know, the emotion and
(15:26):
our narratives, our interpretation, and our spiritual or consciousness self.
And it's based in the Eastern practice of tantra, and
tantra yoga is the yoga of the enougetic body, unlike
the form of yoga we are most familiar with in
(15:46):
the West, which is the yoga, yeah, the yoga of half,
the yoga of the physical body. So we tap into
our inatic body in Tantra joba, and that really includes
also the energy of the sexual, the energy of the creative,
(16:11):
the life giving energy, and become aware of that so
that we can guide that beautiful energy and have it
fuel our love, our heart, our thoughts, our focus, you know.
So both for expanding love with self and then expanding
(16:34):
love with another and connecting what we call the integration
of the sexual spiritual.
Speaker 1 (16:44):
That's very powerful. And I work with a lot of
couples where there has been obviously jealousy, but there's also
been because of maybe there's been an infidelity. How do
you work with couples or what would you say because
I know so many times we feel like I can
never get through this, or how do I move past
this to be able to get back to that vulnerable stake,
(17:07):
almost that excitement state of being together with that person
again when there's been either jealousy or infidelity. Have you
experienced that?
Speaker 3 (17:17):
Absolutely? It's a powerful, you know emotion for people to feel,
you know, jealousy and feel cheated or allied to to see.
What's important though, and most important is if they both
have a desire to move past it, there is hope. Now.
The first piece to this emotional awareness exercise that we
(17:39):
teach is the breathing, and I can share this with
your listeners. It'll take about twenty seconds, okay, so if
you're listened. So if your listeners can sit up as
straight as there can be comfortably in their seating and
put a hand on their belly. Their eyes can be
open closed or soft focus. And I want you to
breathe into your nose, down your trachia, extending into the diaphragm,
which will extend the belle as you inhale and feel
(18:01):
your hand and the belly extend into your hand and
on your exhalation, consciously contracting the belly towards the spine,
following your breath with your awareness up and out through
your nose and your own pace, depth and rhythm. Continue
breathing like that. I'm going to keep saying a few
things now. For most of us, we can do this
for about three breaths before our mind gets busy. So
when you drift and you get distracted, don't engage. Just
(18:25):
bring your awareness back to your breath. Following your breath
with your awareness into your nose, down your trachea, lungs
extending into your diaphragm and belly like a big balloon
on your inhalation, following with your awareness your breath back
up and out through your nose and your own pace,
depth and rhythm. Just one more breath like that, beautiful,
(18:53):
and open your eyes and come on back to the show.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
And notice how you feel right now, Notice how you
feel your body, how you feel emotionally, and perhaps Alexa,
you can just chanil to how you feel.
Speaker 1 (19:07):
Yes, I just felt a huge difference. What was the
word lighter and brighter came to me, but also calmer
and just very aware of being in the moment and
being very present, but feeling peaceful about it.
Speaker 3 (19:25):
That's beautiful because that's the first piece, because it's in
that moment of just watching our thoughts just for a moment,
that's the space, that's the pause that's needed to get
away from, you know, the anger about the infidelity, about that.
There's no possibility about all the story making we do
about this thing that happened, not to diminish the impact
(19:46):
of it. It's just something that happened in the past,
you know. And so but we live it now into
the future and we can't see anything out. So that
practice continues to expand its space as we continue to
do it, to watch just watching the thoughts of what
we call it without what we call the total felt
sense of the thought, which is the feeling, the belief,
the neurosystem, engage the heart, and everything's engaged when we
(20:10):
start to continue to engage in that conversation. So that
witnessing is really important, and then we build on that.
Speaker 2 (20:17):
Yeah, So the conscious valley bread that Freddie just guided
us through allows us to actually tap into the very state, Alexa,
that you described a moment ago, how you are feeling
upon completion of the practice, and from that place we
can look and see versus just to react, and so
(20:42):
of course it needs to be cultivated. Doing it once
it's not doing the trick. So we want to cultivate
that so that we can drop into a state of
calm and peace and live and bright. And then from
they look at what goes on for me, And so
(21:04):
the one who perpetrate it and the one who feels betrayed,
they can look at what is there for them. So
we use the body, we use the brath to create
a different state in the nervous system that allows us
to get a little distance. Doesn't mean that the jealousy,
(21:25):
that the anger, the sense of betrayal is gone. However,
we can just look at it versus fully being it
like it has us instead of us having it. And
that is what we want to cultivate further and in
the process, and you know that it's usually through a
(21:48):
program a couple may come to it's more conducive if
something of that seriousness happens to do private work with us.
They are also invited to do our workshops. But in
private work we can just move much more in a
much more customized way that each of the two of
(22:10):
them in their coighborhood get to see their own part
and get to cultivate that sense of being a listener
and watcher of themselves, and that lowers the charge that
we have them. Then, and when the charge is lowered,
(22:31):
I can start listening to my partner from a different place.
Speaker 1 (22:36):
You know.
Speaker 2 (22:36):
That doesn't mean that he is right now and I'm wrong.
It's not about that. It is that I can see that,
I can hear that, I can learn what may be
over there, and I can share openly, perhaps my hurt,
my deep disappointment, perhaps a sense of hopelessness, and that
(22:59):
there is room. And then when that is established, we
guide them into condric partner work that allows them to
connect heart to horrid instead of hat to hat. What
I mean by that is like being in our head
and being self righteous. They drop into the hord and
(23:22):
from there the heart opens and the connection can get
slowly and slowly, you know, re established. And when that's
re established, we then can also move towards the sexual
but that may take a while.
Speaker 1 (23:40):
And you said three really important words that stuck out
to me is the distance, listening, and to witness. They're
all active in different ways, but I think so many
times people see them as such easy things, but really
when you practice the distance from the event, then you're
(24:03):
able to listen, to really be able to hear and
to see, and you're more of a witness than of
an active participant in that moment because so many times
people are in that site slight or freeze heightened state,
and the breathing has physically, medically been proven to calm
the mind and the body down that are connected. We
(24:26):
can't have our mind and body over stimulated and say, Okay,
I'm here, I'm ready to hear you. No, you're in
that heightened state. So the breathing brings you down, so
your ears are open, your eyes are open.
Speaker 3 (24:37):
Yeah, breathing is you say, prepare sympathetic breathing particularly more
indoor fin serotonin, oxytocin, the feel good hormone, So you're
actually putting yourself in a chemical state of ease breeding
that way, unlike sympathetic breathing, where we breathe in the
upper chest, but when we bring it consciously in a
diaphem and belly, that's the thing that really starts to
develop that pause that we're talking about. Now. Once someone
(24:59):
comes in and they're starting they have this issue and
they maybe go through a you know, part of the
process of getting to what they want is going through
their maybe cathartic exorcism of you know, the experience, and
then this process is breathing and the witness and then
to start how you want to feel. And once they
can just let go of the impact of the experience
(25:23):
and imagine how they want to feel, that starts to
become their truth, their neurosynaptic They're rewiring their neurosystem to
a familiarity of what they want to create, and that
becomes more and more accessible and available as the practices
go on. And then when we work, when we get
to the point where they're working with the sexual meditation again,
(25:45):
that's already going to lead you to an ultra state
working with the sex.
Speaker 2 (25:48):
You have to be ready for that.
Speaker 1 (25:51):
Yes see, well we're getting towards the end of the show.
Where can my listeners find your books, follow you, come
to your workshops, come a client. What would be the
next step?
Speaker 2 (26:04):
Yeah, so the very next step is to pick up
our gift that we want to give everyone who is
listening to the show. It's called Introduction to Sexual Meditation.
And we thought out of the conversation today that it
would be great if we could give you practices that
(26:30):
you can bring into your life right away, just like
that conscious ballet brass, that parasympathetic breathing. There's another practice
in that video class that will allow you to connect
with the energy channel that moves on the base of
(26:50):
the spine to the top of the head and then
move the energy back down again. How to open that
channel and so that you can really take this conversation
into your life in a very practical way. So if
you like to pick that up, Alexi, assume it's going
(27:11):
to be in the show notes the link.
Speaker 1 (27:14):
Yes, yes, I'll put the show. I will definitely put
it in the link where the you, the listeners can
get your free copy of free gift. Thank you so much.
Speaker 2 (27:22):
Yeah, and then.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
Afterwards to to see what other people have learned from
from your gift.
Speaker 3 (27:33):
What.
Speaker 1 (27:34):
I would definitely love to have you guys back on
again because I know so many people are going to
want to reach out to and say what about this.
They're going to be very excited.
Speaker 3 (27:44):
We'd love to come back.
Speaker 2 (27:45):
Yes, that would be great, exciting.
Speaker 1 (27:50):
Great. And also your book your books are on Amazon.
There's an e book.
Speaker 2 (27:56):
Yeah, it's so sexual inlightenment.
Speaker 1 (27:59):
Great, right, and is there also a website to the show,
but just so they know that there are websites that
they can.
Speaker 2 (28:12):
Tantranova dot com, t A n t r A n
O v A dot com and there are all our
workshops and programs and whatever you want to look about us.
And then of course you know you as a listener,
you are invited to also to schedule your complimentary conversation
(28:36):
with us to learn more how all of this may
apply to you, to your situation, and we'd love to
support you in it.
Speaker 1 (28:48):
Absolutely well. Thank you so much for coming on the
show tonight and really providing us all with such an
incredible opportunity to actually to find us ourselves again, to
find our inter being again, and also being able to
connect with ourselves but also how to connect with those
that we love, and that that's a gift that just
(29:10):
keeps on giving.
Speaker 3 (29:13):
Thanks for your work too, Alexa, Thank you so much.
Speaker 1 (29:16):
Thank you, thank you, I get everyone, Thank you so
much for tuning in. If you have any questions, please
send an email to Insight into Healing at gmail dot com.
And everyone. Thank you so much. Everyone, have a good night,
and God bless
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