Learning to Trust Yourself with Tama Kieves

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:01):
Grab a cup of tea or a glass of wine
and tune in for inspired conversations with publisher Linda joy
on Tuesdays at two pm Eastern. Linda creates sacred space
for leading female luminaries, empowering authors, heart centered female entrepreneurs,
coaches and healers. A soulful venue where guests openly share

(00:23):
the fears and obstacles they've overcome, wisdom and lessons learned,
and the personal journey that led them to the transformational
work they do in the world. Inspired conversations to empower
you on your path to authentic, soulful living.

Speaker 2 (00:41):
Welcome to Inspired Conversations. I'm your hosts Linda Joyce, mind
set elevation coach, storytelling guide and publisher of the beloved
Aspire magazine. Can You Believe? Aspire is celebrating nineteen years
of inspiring women to live deeper, more authentic life. You
can grab your free subscription at subscribe to Aspire dot

(01:06):
com and talk about inspirational I am over the moon
to have an old friend here with me today and
we are going to be talking about self trust as
the foundation of happiness, self confidence, and success. Joining me
today is Tam mckeeves, an honest graduate of Harvard Law

(01:26):
School who left her law practice to write and help
others live and breed their most meaningful self expression. She's
the best selling author of A Year Without Fear, three
hundred and sixty five Days of Magnificence in Others. Her
newest groundbreaking book, which we're going to be talking about today,
I just love this title is Learning to Trust Yourself,

(01:50):
Breaking through the Blocks that hold you Back. Featured in
USA Today, Oprah Media, ted x In Moore. She is
a sought after speaker and visionary career success coach who
has helped thousands worldwide to discover their colleagues. You can
learn more at tamakeeeves dot com and oh my goodness,

(02:10):
my friend, welcome to the show.

Speaker 3 (02:13):
I'm so honored to be here, Honey, I gotta tell you.

Speaker 2 (02:16):
I want to give everyone a little backstory. I have
known tamoth since the beginning of Aspire magazine and talk
about learning to trust yourself. I had this inner nudge
way back in two thousand and six or seven, like
I need her to be the keynote speaker at my
big Woman's event. And I was so timid, like, oh

(02:36):
my goodness about reaching out to her long story short,
she believed in the vision, she saw my mission and
said yes, and here we are still connected today. I
love spreading her message every time she releases one of
her transformational books. I'm like, girl, let's get it out there, Tamut.

(02:57):
When I saw the title of your new book, I
immediately was brought back to times in my life where
I struggled because I didn't trust myself. So why is
trusting yourself so so.

Speaker 3 (03:10):
Importul oh God?

Speaker 4 (03:11):
Because because trusting yourself is like, it's the it's the
nexus of your dreams and of your destiny. It's you know,
it's it's really unleashing those superpowers in you, and most
of us are sitting on them. And so I'll just
tell you a quick story. You know, my story, but
for people who might not know of you know, the

(03:32):
reason that trusting myself became so important in my life
was because I didn't trust myself. I hadn't trusted myself
when when I was younger, I knew I wanted to write.
That was my dream, that was my gift. But I
grew up in Brooklyn, New York. My family's Orthodox Jewish
Uh And if you said you wanted to write. Nobody

(03:54):
said Mazeltov. You know, my mother said something like, you're
going to write, You're gonna start, and that was basically it.
And many of us have this experience. We have something
in us we want to do, or something that's enlivening
in us, and then someone else shuts it down, or
the culture shuts it down.

Speaker 3 (04:12):
And so I listened.

Speaker 4 (04:14):
I you know, I thought, well, you're never going to
make a money being creative. So I went off to
law school and I got accepted to Harvard Law School
and graduated with honors from Harvard Law School, and I
was on partnership track and a major law firm, and
I was so unhappy. I just felt so empty. And

(04:34):
I think there are a lot of people who can
relate about doing what you're supposed to do, what you're
expected to do, what somebody else wants you to do,
but it doesn't feat your soul. It doesn't it doesn't
feed who you really are. And it scared me because
at that time I didn't know anything about spirituality. I
don't know anything about these kinds of things. I just

(04:56):
thought something was really really wrong with me. You know,
I had success, what you're supposed to be living, and
I'm utterly miserable.

Speaker 3 (05:02):
I don't even I don't even want to live anymore.

Speaker 4 (05:05):
And then, thank god, a friend of mineset something amazing
and he said, you know, think about it. If you've
been this successful doing something you don't even love, what could.

Speaker 3 (05:16):
You do with what you love? And that just made
sense to me.

Speaker 5 (05:21):
That opened up you know, every chakra, every.

Speaker 3 (05:24):
Everything you know.

Speaker 4 (05:25):
Just it was just an incredible moment, and I just thought,
you get one life.

Speaker 3 (05:29):
I want to know where that goes.

Speaker 4 (05:30):
And so that's what began my entire journey of leaving law,
leaving everything, leaving a cultural identity to really follow in
inner voice. And so I think trusting yourself is everything.
I mean at this point, I have, you know, five
best selling books out there, I've teached thousands of people,
lead retreats, all kinds of incredible things that I would

(05:53):
never have.

Speaker 3 (05:54):
Gotten to do.

Speaker 4 (05:55):
And when we trust ourselves, it's not just for us,
it's like all the people that maybe I've affected, all
the people that they now affect. So I want everybody
here who's listening to just take that in for a moment,
that what if you trusted your gifts, your intuition, your knowing,

(06:18):
your hunches, your love more than you trusted some voice
that tells you, oh, you have to be realistic, you
have to be practical.

Speaker 3 (06:28):
That's really frivolous. Oh that's silly. What if you're going to.

Speaker 4 (06:31):
Try aligning with your strength instead of your weakness? And
that weakness sometimes is you trying to be something you're not.
I want you to be who you are and to
really tap into that power.

Speaker 2 (06:46):
You know. I even though I know your story, every
time I hear it, it just reminds me of different
points in my life where I had to learn to trust. Right,
So let's talk about that for a moment, because you
made that internal decision, and I love the wisdom your
friend shared. I think that can all feel those words, right, Yes, yeah,

(07:07):
And so you get to the point where you go,
enough is enough? Leave what was actually draining you? You
leave your law practice? How did it organically? How did
you organically start building your trust muscles? Because must have
still been scary, like what did I do?

Speaker 4 (07:27):
Oh my goodness, oh my god. Yes, you have that right,
you know, And if anybody reads any of my books,
you know that I share very honestly I'm not one
of those self help authors that's like the three easy steps, right.
I share really really honestly about the fears that come
up and how to undo them.

Speaker 3 (07:47):
But to your Pointlanda, which is very good, is that.

Speaker 4 (07:51):
It's one thing to say, oh, I'm going to trust,
and it's a whole other thing to really start doing it.
And I think, you know, for me, it's a life practice.
It's not a one time deal. You know, I'm still
learning to trust myself. I'm still learning to trust that
I am not alone. I am not alone. There is
a higher love within me, a higher intelligence. There is

(08:15):
a brilliant orchestration in this world if I listen to it.
So to your point of, well, how do you start
listening to it? I think the two main things is
one and we'll talk more about this as we talk
about learning to trust yourself. It's that you stop judging yourself,
you stop being critical of yourself. You know, you think

(08:38):
that that's actually helping you to be so judgmental or critical.
But I had to learn how to love myself. I
had to learn how to really start being kind to
myself and encouraging myself. And the biggest thing about learning
to trust yourself is that you start to follow your desires,
you start to follow your love, You start to follow

(08:58):
the things that light you up, things that move you.
And it's really wild because most of us are conditioned
to not do that. Most of us are conditioned to
squelch that. We think again, we think it's good judgment.
I just have to be an adult. Now, I just
have to be reasonable. Now I have to suppress the
genius of this freaking universe.

Speaker 3 (09:20):
That runs through me.

Speaker 4 (09:21):
I have to suppress all that, because that's not safe.
What's really safe is doing what I hate and limiting
my soul. That's really what's smart. That's that's what we've
that's what we've learned, right we You know, I always
tell my clients that you know, you think you're being
intelligent by suppressing your desires, but I think you're denying

(09:44):
a higher intelligence, a sweeter intelligence that wants to guide you.
And so in learning to trust yourself, the distinction I
make is that our life purpose, our entire purpose here
on this plan, it is to learn how to listen
to an inner voice. But it's not just any inner voice.

(10:07):
That's the mistake people make. It's not an inner voice
of fear. It's the inner voice of love. You have
different voices, you know, and most of us are running
around listening to a critical, shaming, diminishing voice.

Speaker 5 (10:27):
And we're calling that realistic.

Speaker 4 (10:29):
Because the culture will tell you, well, you're crazy, you're
too old for this, or you can't do that, or
you know so and so failed when they tried that,
blah blah blah. Right, and again, I want you to
just if you're listening to this, I want you to
imagine and to know there is an infinite genius in you.
There is an infinite capacity within you. Why would you

(10:53):
choose to listen to somebody else's limitations instead of this
unlimited voice in you.

Speaker 2 (11:00):
Hmmm. It just resonates in such a deep level. It's
love and fear, right, and I know you keep corse
and miracles. So when to take our first break and
we're going to come back. Let's dive into that because
a lot of us don't realize we spend more time
trusting that fearful voice, as you just shared, than the
voice of spirit, love, the divine. So we'll be back

(11:20):
in a moment. My friends, I am here with Tim mckeeves.
Please visit her website at tam mckeeves dot com. Everything's
in the show notes, and of course grab a copy
of her new book, Learning to Trust Yourself.

Speaker 6 (11:34):
We'll be right back, connecting you with the best of
the conscious minds in the world Ome Times Radio I
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Speaker 2 (13:45):
Welcome back. You're listening to inspired conversations and today we're
talking about breaking through the blocks that hold you back,
and it all starts with trusting yourself. So I loved
how you described how many of us will give so
much much credence to that voice that keeps us small, limited, fearful,

(14:05):
and we kind of pooh pooh the other voice and
think that's the unrealistic one. And it's so funny to
me because I did live that life. I lived in
fear and anxiety for thirty something years. And this way
following that, that spark that love is so liberating, freeing.

(14:27):
Have you found that to that? Oh?

Speaker 3 (14:29):
God, yes, you know, And I guess that's what I guess.

Speaker 4 (14:32):
That's what I want people to know is that, you know,
really do an experiment. And you see, you know when
before earlier I was saying, you know, following your desires,
something you love, something you really want to do. It
could even be something simple like I don't know, I
want to walk on the beach today.

Speaker 3 (14:49):
You know, I want to take a nap, right.

Speaker 4 (14:51):
I mean, it doesn't even have to be I want
to write the next best selling book, or I want
to I want to you know, feed the baby seals.

Speaker 3 (14:57):
It doesn't even have to be huge. It could be
just something.

Speaker 4 (15:00):
What you'll notice is that when you follow your desires,
they give you energy. It gives you this amazing energy.
When you don't follow your desires, it drains you. So
that's how you know the difference, And it really is
this personal experimentation. And what I do want people to know,
at least for me, is that, again, like I said earlier,

(15:21):
this is.

Speaker 3 (15:22):
A life practice.

Speaker 4 (15:23):
And so when I wrote Learning to Trust Yourself, I
wanted to write about all the fears that stop us
because we've all, right, we've all been told, you know,
follow the light, follow the love, you know, and we
hear these great stories, but then it's in our lives
and it's like, well, what does that even mean? Or
you know, those limiting thoughts that come up, we don't
even realize they're limiting. So I started exploring all the

(15:47):
different things I was hearing from my clients and all
the things I go through, like self comparison or feeling
helpless or you know, listening to fears, just all the
different things that stop us every single day.

Speaker 3 (16:00):
And again, this is going to be a practice.

Speaker 4 (16:02):
And you mentioned I teach course miracles, I do online programs,
and it's always about that practice of them. I going
to listen to the love inside me? Or am I
going to listen to fear? And I want people to
know that fear can just sometimes sound like being realistic.
It can just sound sometimes sound like well, you know,
you gotta do things this way, and I'm going to

(16:24):
have you question.

Speaker 3 (16:25):
How do you know?

Speaker 4 (16:26):
How do you know the genius that's inside you? Until
you start listening right, And so again, you can always
do a little experiment this way, do something you love,
anything you love, and see how you feel. What happens
is you get connected. It's not only wow, I love
playing the piano when I'm good at music. It's more
that I love playing the piano, and when I do this,

(16:49):
sweeping energy comes through me and I feel connected to.

Speaker 3 (16:53):
Love or to God.

Speaker 5 (16:54):
The God is the light, whatever you want to call it.

Speaker 3 (16:57):
And then I'm on a different.

Speaker 4 (16:58):
Frequency and I start seeing different things. I see evidence
of my reality in a different way. The mind works
on two different tracks. And when you're in love, you
start seeing more possibilities, more opportunities, You start remembering things
that worked for you. When you're in fear, it blocks
out everything and you start thinking that's the world, and

(17:20):
you start thinking that's all you can have.

Speaker 3 (17:22):
We're all making up this world.

Speaker 5 (17:24):
We all live in our own world.

Speaker 4 (17:26):
And it's the world of our perception, and it's the
world of our you know, of what we choose in
this lifetime. So that's why the real life purpose is
to listen to an inner voice. But it's an inner
voice of love instead of fear.

Speaker 2 (17:42):
For me, I always know I have to learn how
to decipher the voices because of something you said earlier.
We're programmed, right, So I was programmed that that limiting
negative voice was my true voice.

Speaker 4 (17:56):
Mm hm.

Speaker 2 (17:57):
And so you know, a navigated life. Believe it. Oh,
this thought must be true, and so of course I
would was creating from this low energy, fear based thinking.
Learning to decipher, as you beautifully shit it, between the
voice of fear and love was the game changer. And
I think we always have to be doing that work

(18:17):
because it isn't like I've been doing this thirty years.
But it isn't like I don't have fears come up.
I just now go, oh, hello, old friend.

Speaker 3 (18:26):
A little bunger, you back again.

Speaker 5 (18:28):
Old talkative friend.

Speaker 2 (18:30):
Yes, And now it's like I don't I don't get angry,
I don't judge it. I go oh, I see you, yeah, okay,
thank you for shiaen. But I got this.

Speaker 4 (18:42):
See but you just said something super critical, Linda. You said,
I don't judge it. No, right, Most of us go
into judgment of ourselves.

Speaker 3 (18:51):
We'll go I can't believe I feel this way.

Speaker 4 (18:53):
And you know, I thought I thought I was done
with this issue, or I thought, you know, how come
this is coming up again?

Speaker 3 (18:59):
What am I doing wrong?

Speaker 4 (19:01):
Right? And we go into this immediate judgment of ourselves.
And when you go into judgment of yourself, game over.
You've shut down that frequency. Right, It's like if you
learn nothing else. Like for me in writing learning to
Trust Yourself, the whole message of this book really is
in I want you creating this relationship with yourself that
is so loving, that is so nurturing, that is so healing,

(19:24):
and like Blinda just said, right, I don't judge it,
I observe it.

Speaker 3 (19:29):
I work with myself.

Speaker 4 (19:31):
I guide myself, I encourage myself right, and I become
a different energy and I want to be transparent.

Speaker 2 (19:39):
I went through that stage. So on this journey of
learning to trust myself, I went through a stage of
here you go again, having that fear based thought, like
judging that I should be further along because I've done
so much work. And then I realized the moment I'm saying,
should must have to I know I'm in the lower self,

(20:02):
but I did go through that real harsh judgment of
myself when I was on as I've gone deeper into
my spiritual path and now I'm at the place that
you so beautifully describe as compassion self compassion right, and
it's such a softer way to live. So one of

(20:23):
the other things too that you have shared. And when
I first read it, I'm like, ohh this is powerful
this as you say, people who don't succeed get in
their own way quote, but people who do succeed discover
their own way. And I was like, oh right, Honestly,

(20:44):
that's what happens. I hear hot music and angels when
when this big epiphany drops in, and I was like,
what a loving but firm way of having someone reflect
on getting out of their own way. So, yeah, ask
you what exactly do you mean by that?

Speaker 4 (21:03):
Yes, you know, it's one of the reasons I wrote
this book is because in you know, in my coaching practice,
I kept seeing people getting in their own way, and
and what I meant by that is they'd have an idea,
they'd have a love, they'd have something, and then do
you think this would work?

Speaker 3 (21:18):
And I don't know.

Speaker 4 (21:19):
And in nineteen ninety nine, this didn't happen, and la
la la, and they'd slow down and they'd get in
their own way. And the people who were succeeding and flying,
they were discovering their own way. They weren't questioning, they
weren't looking at what everybody else was doing and how
you're supposed to do it. They were just listening, this
feels right, I'm going to choose this, I'm going.

Speaker 5 (21:40):
To do that.

Speaker 4 (21:40):
They were moving, they were trying, they were experimenting, they
were allowing themselves to fail or flop in something and
not making it mean anything but learning and growing. And
the one thing I kept seeing that was the difference
in that that really fascinated me was the people who
discover their own way, they trust, they trust. And but

(22:02):
when when I say trust yourself, it's not just yourself,
it's that you really really trust that you're being guided,
that you really learn how to trust that, there is
something else. When I say trusting yourself, it's not your
smaller self, it's not your conditioned self, it's your genius self,
it's your higher love self. Right, And so in my
own path, it was that it's like because of I

(22:25):
had to discover my own way. God forbid, I could
do anything normal. God forbid it could be cookie cutter.
God forbid I could follow a program just once and
have it work. That never ever happened for me. I
continually have to discover my own way, and there's always
a way. And I think the reason I talk about

(22:45):
this in the book is because you know everybody wants
the steps. Yeah, but Tima, what are the steps?

Speaker 2 (22:50):
Right?

Speaker 4 (22:50):
I don't think we need the steps. I always tell
people you don't need the steps.

Speaker 3 (22:54):
You need to be moved. You need to be moved.

Speaker 4 (22:57):
And what that means is that if you cultivate a
different relationship with yourself, you can do anything. If you
start cultivating a loving relationship with yourself, you can do
anything in this world. You know, if you're on a diet,
everybody knows the steps.

Speaker 2 (23:14):
You know.

Speaker 4 (23:15):
I have figured out by now that oh maybe I
should e Kale instead of Ben and Jerry's I know
that step. That doesn't mean I'm doing it right. I
know this step, but here's how I get to that step.
It's not vibrating myself or just knowing more steps. It's
not the steps for me. It's cultivating that loving relationship
with myself, like really loving me, guiding me, being compassionate,

(23:40):
for giving myself for mistakes, and again in learning to
trust yourself. I teach you how to do all this.
But for me, that's been the game changer is having
a different relationship with myself means I have a different
relationship with the universe because I you know, all the
times people say, but I can't hear what my inner
guide is saying, I can't hear what the universe is saying.

(24:01):
I'm not sure what it is. I guarantee you it's
because you're judging yourself on some level. And if you
become patient and loving and kind, you will know every
single step you will discover your own way. And it's
mind blowing, uh And it's natural and it's easy, but
it comes from again cultivating that relationship with yourself where

(24:25):
you're kinder, you're loving. Because when I'm loving to myself,
then we can hear a loving in your voice, then
I can hear the universe. I can't hear a loving
universe when i'm judging the help. When I'm going you're fat,
you're old, you're this, you're that. It's never gonna work
for you. It works for Linda work for Tama, but
it's not go work for you.

Speaker 1 (24:42):
Right.

Speaker 3 (24:43):
If you're listening to that and.

Speaker 4 (24:44):
You're discounting things and you're making yourself different, that's not
that loving voice. You were born whole, You were born alive,
you were born with this light, and it's time to listen.

Speaker 2 (24:54):
M This really resonates because you know me long enough
to know something you said. You said you need to
be moved, not take steps. And that brought me back
to like when I started Aspire, and you remember this. Yes,
I never said ever. It was never a conscious choice
Tama to go I think I'll start a magazine. No,

(25:17):
I did not want to start a magazine, but the
inspiration kept coming through a dream. And I see now
even the front cover, complete design. I see now that
all I did. I didn't see it at the time,
though I trusted took the next inspired step. Yes, something
else would unfold, like this printer that was a family

(25:39):
owned printer locally. They took me under their wing when
they saw the papers I handed them. I'm like, I
need ten thousand copies of this magazine. They're like, that's
not the files we need.

Speaker 4 (25:49):
Right.

Speaker 2 (25:51):
Here's what's funny. I followed inspiration. I trusted myself and
the divine brought me this family owned printer who took
me under their wings and taught me everything I needed
to know to birth aspire. I still believe to this day,
follow your inspiration, trust yes, and let the divine lead

(26:13):
the way instead of trying to push and force and
make things.

Speaker 4 (26:16):
Yes.

Speaker 2 (26:17):
Yes, and everything I've created since then. So this whole
conversation just bringing me back to my own journey of
oh wow, yes, we don't realize when we just let
go and soften, the divine already knows every step that
we need. It knows our divine plan. We just can
I get out of the way so the divine can
support us?

Speaker 3 (26:37):
Yes? And if you and if you had stopped and
go a magazine? Who am I? How could I do that?

Speaker 2 (26:42):
Well? I remember having those thoughts, of course, but there
was something pulling me, Yeah, We're going to take a break.
But there was something internally, because I've been giving a
lot of thought of this lately, pulling me forward. Even
though the mind, the fear based thought, the small self,

(27:04):
was like, what do you know about stotton a magazine?
I'm like, I have no idea, but this is not
coming from me, It's coming through me.

Speaker 1 (27:11):
Wooo Yeah.

Speaker 2 (27:12):
Even though Tam, at that time I did don't even
understand that language. I can. I can say it now.
But let's take a break. We'll be back in a
moment with the amazing Tam mc keeves, author of many books,
but her most recent learning to Trust Yourself, Breaking through
the blocks that hold you back. Be sure to grab
a copy at Tam mkeeths dot com. We'll be right back,

(27:35):
my friends.

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living their sacred truth so they can find greater connection
with their inner wisdom and their divine source to co

(28:29):
create a life that brings peace, joy and self acceptance.
Visit lovesthseeed dot com for positive guidance and valuable resources
to support you in embracing an empowered life view.

Speaker 3 (28:44):
If I could be you and you could be meat
for just one hour, if you could find a way
to get.

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Inside each other's mind.

Speaker 7 (28:52):
Walk a mile in my shoes, walk a mile in
my shoes, bluck.

Speaker 1 (28:56):
A mile in my shoes.

Speaker 8 (28:58):
We've all felt left out, and some that feeling lasts
more than a moment. We can change that. Learn how
it Belonging begins with us dot org. Brought to you
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Speaker 3 (29:09):
Welcome out.

Speaker 6 (29:14):
Host your show on IOMFM, the radio network of ome
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Speaker 2 (29:38):
Welcome back. You're listening to inspire conversations. I'm Linda Joy
with me today is Tam mckeeves and we're talking about
learning to trust yourself, why it's important to stop judging yourself.
And you know, privately before we hit record, we were
talking and I was saying, you know, we can either

(29:58):
navigate life looking for the blessings are looking for the bullshit.
And one of the things for me is there's so
many people and clients and friends who spend all the
energy looking for the evidence that things aren't working out
for them instead of the evidence that it is. What
do you share about that, TIMU.

Speaker 4 (30:20):
Oh, yeah, that you nailed it, because that's exactly what's
happening for most of us when people when you're hearing
learning to trust yourself, you're already jumping to the evidence, right, like, well,
I don't know about that because I dated that psycho
killer back in the back in two thousand, right. And
so here's the thing. What you look for, you will
find what you are or you will find right. And

(30:41):
so even neuroscienceists say this that the brain works in algorithms.

Speaker 3 (30:46):
So right, Uh, it's it's that again.

Speaker 4 (30:49):
If you have a belief about something, and you have
that belief, you will look for the evidence to support
that belief. But what's scary is you will block out
everything else. So what I want you to know is
that you right now are living by listening to your

(31:09):
stories about your life more than about your life. Right
You're like everything in your life that happens, it's you
made it mean something. You told a story about it,
and you are now living those stories, and you may
be blocking out the truth.

Speaker 3 (31:29):
So you may be looking.

Speaker 4 (31:30):
You know, if you if you have a belief that says, well,
I never make that much money, then your mind is
going to find out, oh see here, this bill came
in right, and you're going to start noticing that instead
of noticing so did this creative idea that could have
made you a lot of money? So did this connection
with this person that could have led you to something amazing,
But you didn't pay attention to it because you were

(31:50):
listening to your belief and paying attention to the bill.
So I want to tell you a quick story about
this because it was a life changing thing for me,
and I started looking. I had a belief I had
and the belief was always I never get what I want,
never really get what I want. To get close, but
I never really get what I want? Right, And so
you know, a client would cancel you know, when I

(32:11):
was in starting business, a client would cancel, see I
never get what I want, you know, or something wouldn't
come through a trip I was planning and then it
got canceled or whatever. Oh see, I never get what
I want. Like that belief just kept coming up over
and over, and I finally started looking at it and realizing,
I never get what I want. That's crazy, that's absolutely

(32:34):
crac I got a purple pen.

Speaker 3 (32:35):
I wanted that. You know, I got books published.

Speaker 5 (32:38):
I wanted that.

Speaker 4 (32:40):
I got a great dentist who doesn't make fun of
me because my water pick has cobwebs on it.

Speaker 3 (32:45):
You know, It's like, you know, I got that.

Speaker 5 (32:48):
You know.

Speaker 4 (32:48):
It's like I started realizing it's crazy to say you
never get it, And so I want.

Speaker 3 (32:53):
To tell you this quick story. I started looking out.

Speaker 4 (32:55):
Like where this belief came from, and I remembered this
experien of when I was a little girl. I was
shopping with my mother one time, and we were in
this department store and I saw these red shoes, and
I wanted these red shoes.

Speaker 5 (33:10):
It's like, oh my god, I love these red shoes.

Speaker 4 (33:13):
But my mother, you know, was a really practical woman
and I knew I wasn't going to get them.

Speaker 3 (33:17):
My mother was like, you know.

Speaker 5 (33:18):
Oh look look they have green elf shoes.

Speaker 4 (33:20):
They're on sale. They'll be Oh, you're going to love these,
Let's get these, you know, like I was expecting that,
and but that day she bought the red shoes. It
was amazing. She bought me what I wanted. It was
like like the.

Speaker 5 (33:34):
Heavens opened up harp plate.

Speaker 3 (33:37):
It was like, oh my god, right, and I was.

Speaker 4 (33:39):
So so happy, and we put them in the shopping
bag or whatever, and then we lost the shopping bag,
and so that belief happened.

Speaker 3 (33:48):
Like see, I never get what I want right. And
I was just so disappointed.

Speaker 4 (33:53):
And I looked back at that belief and it was just,
you know, it was a little girl's disappointment, right, never
get it right, instead of it was something that happened
that was disappointing. But then I shut down to ever
wanting things. I got disappointed, and then I closed my
heart to believing in things and wanting things. And so

(34:13):
it was really important for me to go back to
that memory and see that the kicker of this story
that's like unbelievable to me was I. Years later, I
talked to my mother about it, about remember we lost
those red shoes and we got that blah blah blah.
And she looked at me and she said, what are
you even talking about? And I said, well, you know,
I've got those red shoes and then you lost them.

(34:34):
And she's like, yeah, we lost them, but then we
got them back. And I'm like, what do you mean
you know? And she said, you know, we called the
department store, they found the bag, we got the shoes.
I never ever remembered that part of the story. I
only remembered my belief. I never get what I want,

(34:54):
And so I want people to hear that right, because
you remember your belief and you are blocking out reality.

Speaker 3 (35:02):
I've gotten those damn shoes.

Speaker 4 (35:03):
I got so many other great things in my life,
but I shut that out because I only listened to
the belief. You are only listening to a belief. And
that's why when you're learning to trust yourself, it's really
the most important thing.

Speaker 3 (35:14):
You're ever going to do.

Speaker 4 (35:15):
Is you're going to start befriending yourself and having a
different relationship. And we're going to start looking at those stories,
my loves. We're going to look at those stories and
we're going to undo them.

Speaker 2 (35:25):
What a powerful story. And look at the power of
the mind it grabbed on to that one moment of
disappointment created a whole story that you carried for decades. Yes,
became a belief that kind of it was underneath every
dream and vision you had that I might go after
this dream but it's never going to happen. But it

(35:48):
must have been so unconscious. And how many of us
ladies have unconscious beliefs. I'm still clamming. I'm at sixty
two and a half years old. It's like, ooh, you're
back again. I thought this one was done, but this
isn't there a layer's tama, Oh yes, yes, lays to
the same story I noticed.

Speaker 4 (36:07):
Yes, yes, And we're different. You know when you tell yourself,
I can't believe I'm here again. You're not here again.
You're very different in this moment. You're you're going, like
Linda said, you're going to a different level or a
layer of it, but you're not in the same situation ever.

Speaker 2 (36:24):
Yeah, you know how I had to convince myself. I'm
a visual person, so I need a visual to hold
on to. When I was in that judgment phase of Oh,
here you go again. I thought you cleared this belief.
It's I was given a vision many years ago and
I was going through a tough time, probably I don't know,
fifteen sixteen years ago, and it was this beautiful spiral

(36:46):
path through the woods, and ahead of me on that path,
I could see shapes of other women carrying beautiful lands,
and I was carrying my land. And then I turned
around and saw a woman coming up this spiral path
behind me, and I said, oh, I get it now.

(37:07):
We will always be on the path, we will always
be unfolding. But I'm not. Even though I'm still on
the path carrying the light for those behind me, there's
others carrying the light ahead of me. Yeah. And just
because a lesson comes up again, or a belief or
whatever it may be. When I in the vision, I
went above the path and realized it wasn't a flat

(37:30):
path through the woods, it was actually a spiraling up
who my connection was sourced and I realized I might
have had that same belief when I was at the
low small end of the spiral, and I'm having the
belief when I'm in the middle, and I'm gonna have
the belief again because it's different levels of healing. Does
that mean true for your experience?

Speaker 4 (37:50):
Absolutely true, Absolutely true. And again I don't think we
could have done it any other way.

Speaker 3 (37:57):
You know, when I've been.

Speaker 4 (38:00):
Or younger, or didn't have as much experience, it's like
it's like there's a kindness in the universe that I'm
not equipped yet to go all the way, you know,
like my crazy mind will be like, well, can't we
just do a root canal? Like can't we just dive
in and get it all out all at once? And
it's like the universe is kinder. It's like you couldn't
sustain that, you wouldn't have the awareness, you wouldn't have

(38:21):
the wisdom.

Speaker 3 (38:22):
There's perfection in it all.

Speaker 4 (38:24):
And I found that every single block I have, every
single fear I have, when I work with it, it
actually propels me further and so that there's even purpose
in it. You know, if I didn't have pain, I
never would have gone on a spiritual path that was
not I would never have I would have thought, oh,
this is weird.

Speaker 3 (38:42):
That's where people who can't culp.

Speaker 4 (38:44):
When I was, when I was finally somebody who couldn't call,
then it's like, Okay, give me that stuff right, And
so again I think our fears and our limitations, I
always say, they come here to show you how really
unlimited you are. They're like problems that you work with.
They're equations that you work with and then you access
even different hollier powers in them.

Speaker 2 (39:05):
You know, I feel the same way you do when
I look back at all those moments. I was down
on my knees thinking I'm never going to make it
through this situation, experience, etc. I got through because I
remembered at some point in my life hearing that the
Divine God source will never give you more than you
can handle. So even though Linda, the wounded person at

(39:29):
that moment, couldn't see how I could get through it,
that one phrase gave me something to hold on to,
Like the Divine believes I'm strong enough. That's why I'm
having this experience. I will get through it. I will
come on the other side. And then when I come
out the other side, it's like like the little girl
going eh, I did it, And now I live with

(39:51):
that sense of listen. Life is always going to throw
us curve balls. It's part of life. But as we
go through it, I find I'm more, virtually tuned in,
emotionally and spiritually stronger. So all those things that I
would have perceived at one time as negative experiences really
were freaking gifts.

Speaker 4 (40:11):
They are And that's I mean. And you go through
life in such a better way when you know that,
right when you're not resisting you know again. I teach
course miracles, and it's so much everything's a miracle. There's
nothing that's not a miracle. There's no bad circumstance. There's
no good circumstance. It's how you show up in the circumstance.
And to your point, Linda, you know, I have a

(40:34):
very doubting part of myself. I have a very cautious
part of myself. But at the same time, I have
a very reverent part of myself. I have a very
knowing part of myself. We all have these different parts.
And so even though you're doubting right now, or fearful
right now, or anxious right now, I promise you there

(40:55):
is another part of you that is not There is
another part of you that knows exactly what the deal is,
and they both exist at the same time. It's just
learning how to listen to one instead of the other.

Speaker 2 (41:09):
I love this, I love this, I love this, and
it's such a powerful message for anyone who may be
struggling right now. So we're going to take our final
break and come back for our last segment this conversation.
There's no accidents in my friends. As we're living our
life's messengers come in in. This message from Tim is
really touching my heart today. So we'll be right back

(41:32):
and stay with us.

Speaker 6 (41:34):
The best of the holistic, spiritual and conscious world, Own
Times Radio, I own FM.

Speaker 1 (41:41):
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her husband Paul are the founders of Relationship development dot
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(42:06):
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(42:29):
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Speaker 9 (42:51):
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together top experts and those thriving regardless of their diagnosis
to bring you the latest, most up to date information.

(43:13):
Join me Sharon Saylor Friday night, seven pm Eastern for
the Autoimmune Hour on Life Interrupted Radio to find out
how to live your life uninterrupted.

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Discover the unsearchable.

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Visit discoverthefores dot org to find a trail near You.

Speaker 3 (43:49):
Brought to you by the United States Forest Service and
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Speaker 6 (43:51):
Council Free your Mind with Ome Times Radio I own FM.

Speaker 2 (43:56):
Welcome back to Inspired Conversations. Thanks for staying with us.
I'm with Tam mckeeves, author of Learning to Trust Yourself,
Breaking through the blocks that hold you back, as we
have shared. Tam is also taught a course in Miracles
for years. Is known for her smart spitfire spirituality, electric humor,
and the big possibility she brings out in others. So

(44:19):
I want you to be sure to visit her at
Tam mckeeves dot com. So in our last segment.

Speaker 4 (44:25):
And I will say, by the way, I have a
brand new course in Miracles class coming up.

Speaker 3 (44:28):
So yes, thank you, yes, yes.

Speaker 2 (44:32):
So please everyone stay connected get on her email list
so you don't miss the upcoming class. So how would
you like to close out our last segment? What direction
would you like to go? And you have so much
wisdom to share, my friends. So we talked about why
trusting yourself is important, how to trust yourself, why people

(44:55):
get in their own way, and I love that whole conversation.
And we talked about what you focus on at either
evidence that things out working out for you and your
beautiful storytelling, or focusing on the signs and synchronicities that
are being led, what other insights I do.

Speaker 4 (45:14):
I'm happy to do that, and I have a great
I think I have a great way to explore with
you because it's totally where we're at. But I do
want to mention because we've been talking so much about
learning how to listen to that love instead of that fear,
and so many times people are like, I don't know how.
I don't know how, and so I just wanted to
mention that I have a free gift for your community.

(45:36):
I don't know you may you may already have that
in the show notes or not, but but it's just
it's a video I finally did. I've taught this technique
to thousands and thousands of people. It's something I use
daily every single day of my life. It's UH and
you can get it at tammacievs dot com, t A
M A k I e v e S dot com,

(45:58):
Forward Slash Best Dash Tool And it's just a video
that will walk you through undoing fear right now and
trusting yourself right now. So if you're ever in fear,
you're ever, just because I want to make this practical
of I just want people to have a take home,
take home something. But to your point of where to go,
you know, I guess one of the things I want

(46:20):
people to know because people will say, well, I don't
I don't know what direction I'm supposed to go, and
I don't I don't know what my desire is, I
don't know what.

Speaker 3 (46:28):
My love is.

Speaker 4 (46:28):
And I always tell people that you can't plan an
inspired life. You're not going to plan this inspired life
kind of how like Linda Wist, I love your story,
Linda about the magazine, right, and just like an idea comes,
but the deal is, some.

Speaker 3 (46:46):
Idea comes, or some instinct comes, and then we shut.

Speaker 4 (46:49):
It down with again thinking about how to do this,
should I do this?

Speaker 5 (46:55):
What the world?

Speaker 4 (46:56):
The state of the world is, right, And I'm going
to remind you of you can't plan an inspired life.
And how this inspired life works is that we don't
get the whole map. We don't get the whole you know,
the whole direction, the five year plan, the ven diagram, Right,

(47:16):
we get bread crumbs. We get a tiny bread crumb,
Like I don't know why, but this is what I
want to do. I don't know why, but that's what
I want to do, you know. And so for me,
when I left law, I didn't know what I was
going to do. I didn't know how I was ever
going to be a writer. I didn't know how I
was going to do anything. And I always tell the story,
and I'll tell a very short, short version of this,

(47:36):
but it was my most significant, significant miracle of following
that trust, and it's why I believe so much in it,
because I want you to have this life. I want
you to have a life that makes you so grateful
you want to weep.

Speaker 3 (47:52):
I want you to have a life that's touching others,
moving others, just in who you be. Right, So I
wrote my first book. This time, I danced creating the work.

Speaker 4 (48:00):
I wrote that for twelve years.

Speaker 3 (48:03):
I spent twelve years writing that book.

Speaker 4 (48:05):
And people are like, oh my God, But I always
tell people it took me eleven years to heal, eleven
years to believe, eleven years to trust one ye were
to write a book. And the reason I tell you
that is because if things are taking time in your
life right now, you think, God, why aren't I further
ahead those of us who are on a spiritual path.
Those of us who are Maverick souls. We are doing

(48:27):
so much all at once, right, this is not a
linear path. Anyways, I didn't know how to get it published.
I finally asked my inner voice, what am I supposed
to do? I heard an inner voice that said, just
put it in the river. Just put it in the river.
And I knew intuitively that that meant to self publish
the book. But that was terrifying to me because I

(48:49):
didn't know anything about marketing or distribution or any of
it and putting your own money into it. But I'd
follow that inner voice. Can you imagine following that inner
voice for twelve years, no matter what, and then doing
the next step, and the next step, and the next step.

Speaker 3 (49:03):
I will cut to the chase.

Speaker 4 (49:05):
I self published that book, and four months later I
got an email out of the blue that said, your
fairy godmother has arrived. Your fairy godmother has arrived. Well,
I first got it. You know, you think it's spam
or something. You think it's going to be like Russian
girls or waiting for you or something crazy, right, you know,
But I opened it up and it was from a

(49:27):
vice president of marketing and publicity for Random House, and
she'd been in a career transition and she'd been like
having a meltdown. And she was on Amazon and she
saw somehow found myself published book, and she got it
to the publisher I'd always dreamed of. She said, she
read it, and she said, this is the best book
I've ever read on finding your calling and doing your dreams.

(49:49):
I just love your writing. And she got into the
publisher had always always dreamed of.

Speaker 3 (49:54):
It was Penguin, it was you know, Major in New
York House.

Speaker 4 (49:58):
They bought the book ex exactly the way that it was,
the exact writing, the exact title, everything. As an unknown author,
I would never have started off the way I started off,
had I doubted myself and done what everybody else told me,
Oh you got to do this, and you got to
do that, and you should be doing this, and how

(50:20):
do you plan that right? How do you plan that
kind of magic's gonna happen? They not only bought my
book and kept it exactly the same and get which
as ann writer, never happens. They have bought every book
I've ever written. And then that publisher went on to
Saint Martin's Press Now and he just took me with
him there, and learning to trust yourself came.

Speaker 3 (50:37):
Out like it's my biggest dream. It's like because I followed.

Speaker 4 (50:42):
That light, and I followed that voice, and I doubted
and I.

Speaker 3 (50:47):
Freaked and I was scared, but I followed anyway. That's
why I'm so excited.

Speaker 4 (50:51):
I want to see what happens in people's lives when
they follow what's true for them. Because we're all divine,
we all have this, we all have this stream within us,
and we're holding ourselves back and the planet needs us
right now, and we need us right now.

Speaker 2 (51:08):
I love that story and such a similar journey right
my vision for Aspire. You holding that vision and trusting yourself.
What a beautiful way and beautiful story to close out
our conversation with. And I want to invite everyone again
to go to Tamakeeeves dot com and Tamma, can you

(51:28):
give that link to that special gift again? Please?

Speaker 3 (51:31):
Yes?

Speaker 4 (51:32):
And I really encourage people to do it, just because
don't just listen to this, do it. It really walks
you through. It's fun, it's short, It's Tamma Keeves D
A M A K I E V E S dot
com Forward slash best dash tool and it'll walk you through.
People have loved it, and it's just it's my favorite technique.

(51:53):
It's just something that can flip that switch for me.
I want you doing it, and I want you cultivating
that relationship with yourself. And of course I want you
buy my books because they're gonna they're gonna mentor you
and love you and walk you through everything.

Speaker 3 (52:07):
And I would love to hear from.

Speaker 2 (52:09):
You thank you for that sacred gift. Again. That's Tamakeeves
dot Com Forward Flash Best hyphen two Tama, thank you,
Thank you, my friend. It's been such a joy to
circle up with you again. Yes, excited for you in
this new book. And until next time, my friends, choose love,

(52:33):
Choose joy, Choose happiness. Blessings.

Speaker 1 (52:37):
Thanks for listening to Inspired Conversations with publisher Linda Joy.
Join our Sacred Space every Tuesday at two pm Eastern
and meet leading female visionaries, empowering authors, heart centered female entrepreneurs, coaches,
and healers. Inspired Conversations with Linda Joy is a soulful

(52:57):
venue where guests share the obstacles overcome along with wisdom
and lessons learned on their personal journey that led them
to the transformational work they do in the world. Inspired
conversations to empower you on your path to authentic and
soulful living

Speaker 9 (56:01):
In England, English, England

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