August 11, 2025 • 29 mins
A legendary variety show blending witty monologues, comic sketches, and musical interludes, all anchored by the impeccable timing of its beloved host. It’s a masterclass in comedic timing.
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Jack Benny program presented by Lucky Strike.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
There is a leble no no no, no, no no no.
Speaker 3 (00:08):
Men, smoke a Lucky to feel your level best. Smoke
a Lucky to feel your level best, your level best.
That's just how you'll feel when you light up a
Lucky Because Lucky's fine tobacco picks you up when you're low,
calms you down when you're tim.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Put you on the right level to feel and do
your level best.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
It's important to you as a smoker to know that
fine tobacco can do this for you. And every smoker
knows ls n F T L S m f T
Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. Remember more independent tobacco experts, auctioneers, buyers,
and warehousemen smoke Lucky Strike regularly than the next two
leading bands combined. It's good to know that fine tobacco
(00:47):
picks you up when you're low, calms you down when
you're tim by putting you on the right.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Level to feel and do your level best.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
That's the Lucky level.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
So smoke a Lucky to feel.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
Your level best.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Yes, the next time you buy cigarettes, remember Lucky's Fine
tobacco put you on the right level. The lucky level
where you feel your level best and do your level best.
Welco lucky to feel your level best. Get on the
lucky level where it's fun to be alive.
Speaker 4 (01:12):
Get a carton of.
Speaker 3 (01:13):
Luckies and get started.
Speaker 5 (01:14):
Today the Lucky Strike Program starring Jack Benny with Mary Levison,
Phil Harris, Rochester, Dannis Staying.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
Here's Polly done. Welcome, ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 5 (01:46):
Today marks Jack Benny's first program on the Columbia Broadcasting System.
So let's go back a couple of hours and pick
up Jack and Marry on their way to the studio.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Rochester is driving, ass Rochester, don't cross the double line
the top of that car. What's the matter with you.
Speaker 6 (02:06):
I'm riding as terrifully as I can.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Boys, Well, just watch it, that's all.
Speaker 7 (02:10):
Oh, for heaven's sake, Jack, calm down, don't be so nervous.
I'm not nervous, and stop pacing up and down on
the running board.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
Okay, Mary, I'll admit that I am nervous, and you
can't blame me. Today's my opening broadcast on CBS.
Speaker 7 (02:27):
All right, So you're opening on CBS.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
What do you mean? All right? Do you realize it's
the first time I program will be hurt in Alaska.
Speaker 7 (02:34):
So what I've yet to see a wall or smoking
a lucky strike?
Speaker 2 (02:41):
Oh yeah, I saw one last night.
Speaker 7 (02:44):
That was Jerry Kloonna, and.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I'll have to apologize I threw him a fish. Anyway, Mary,
this is no time for joking. I'm upset.
Speaker 7 (02:53):
Oh, for heaven's sake, Jack, Why should you be worried?
You must have a million dollars down in your ball.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
I know, but I don't want to break up the
serial number. I mean, Mary, stop asking me questions, will you.
I'm in the Rochester. I don't want to have an
accident on the way to the studio. Now throw down.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
I'm only going twelve miles an hour. Don't give me that.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
What does it say on this pedometer made in.
Speaker 7 (03:25):
I mean, besides that, Jack, you're working yourself into a
breakdown Rochester. See if you get something on the radio.
So mister Benny can relax.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
I conclude another broadcast by your friendly philosopher, and now
for a special announcement. Remember only two more hours and
Jack Benny will be on CBS.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Turn that off.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
That's all he been broadcasting for the past week. Six
more days for Jack then five more days for Jack Benny,
four more days, two more hours.
Speaker 7 (03:54):
Well, Jack, if you don't like it, make him stop us.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
I will not.
Speaker 7 (04:06):
I can't figure you out. First you don't like it,
then you do like it. I've never seen you this way.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
He's been a nervous wreck all week, missus Livingston. Last
night he didn't sleep a wink. He just kept tossing
and turning and whippering like a baby.
Speaker 7 (04:19):
Well, I wasn't anything you could do.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Far.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
I tried everything. I even threw him over my shoulder
and burnt in plenty.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
Ah, Rochester, stop exaggerating.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
I'm not exaggerating.
Speaker 8 (04:32):
Boss.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
You hadn't been talking in.
Speaker 7 (04:34):
Your sleep, talking in his sleep?
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Yeah, Miss Levingston, who is William Paley?
Speaker 7 (04:39):
William Paley's ahead of the Columbia Broadcasting system?
Speaker 2 (04:42):
Why he has now replaced Halamar and mister Benny's dream
stop Rochester? I never dreamed about mister Paley.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Yes you did, Boss.
Speaker 9 (04:54):
All night long, you kept saying, DA tell me why
day Rochester?
Speaker 2 (05:01):
And I upset enough as it is without your discussing.
Oh fine, that's all I need now a traffic Rochester.
We wanted to pull over to the curve.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
Caught. You didn't die.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
What's the matter, officer? Were we speeding?
Speaker 1 (05:29):
Don't flatter yourself. You went through a red light, Officer.
The light was glean when we stared through the intersection.
I know, but it changed twice before this gelope got.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Acron Look, officer, I'm afraid this is my fault. I'm
in a hurt.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
I'm talking to the driver, so'll keep your.
Speaker 6 (05:46):
But wait a minute.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
You're Jack Fanny, aren't you.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
Yes, yes, I am.
Speaker 9 (05:52):
Well then you must be on your way to the
studio to do your first broadcast for CBS.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
Well, only a lot would give you a ticket on
a day like this.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Well, thank you.
Speaker 9 (06:03):
It's j Can's with Officer Sam Loud. What I'm sorry,
mister Benny. But beauty is duty now I'll right this.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Calling all cars, calling all.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
Cars, excuse me a minute. This may be important.
Speaker 2 (06:23):
Attention all officers. There has been a hold up on
fourth and Olive. Investigate a double murder at Hill and Grand.
Only two more hours and Jack Benny will be on CBS. Gee,
they have an announcement on your radio too. He the
police must like my program.
Speaker 9 (06:39):
Yes, they used it down at headquarters for the third degree, third.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Degree twice, I confessed and I didn't even do anything. Well,
you can go, mister Benny, and I won't give you
a ticket. I can't stand the tears in those big
blue eyes.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Thank you. Go ahead, Rochester, drive on just.
Speaker 1 (07:01):
The second, Boss, I've got to start the motive.
Speaker 7 (07:03):
Jee wiz, Jack. I hope you don't have trouble starting
it like you always do.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
Don't worry about that me. Yesterday I had the motor tuned.
Go ahead, Rochester started?
Speaker 7 (07:41):
Who tuned it?
Speaker 8 (07:42):
Spike Jones?
Speaker 2 (07:45):
Mary?
Speaker 4 (07:45):
Please?
Speaker 2 (07:46):
Rochester cryet again? Will you don't worry, Boss, I'll get
this motor started.
Speaker 6 (07:50):
But close your eyes.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Why I'm gonna use the whip.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
I don't care what you use.
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Let's get to the studio. See Mary. They've got a
nice lot here, haven't they. Yeah, here's your parking take.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
It, mister.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
Thank you, and boy, be careful when you park my car.
Why come on, Mary.
Speaker 7 (08:20):
Say Jack, as we drove in, did you see that
big sign on the building?
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Big sign? Or what does it say?
Speaker 5 (08:26):
Jack?
Speaker 7 (08:26):
Benny has switched to CBS. Bill Harris has switched to Sternal.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Oh yes, it was his New Year's resolution. Well, here's
the art of sentence, let's go in odor man. Yeah,
I'm Jack Benny.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
I don't care who you are. Wipe your feet.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
Well, look, when mister William Paley comes in, tell him
I want to see him right away, will you Okay,
we don't matter. Even though I'm trying to keep calm,
I can't help being nervous today. I guess every actor feels.
Speaker 7 (08:58):
Oh Jack, who's coming down the hall?
Speaker 2 (09:00):
Amos Andy, Oh yeah, they're coming this way. Hello amos, Hello,
Miss Benny, Hello, Miss Livingston.
Speaker 8 (09:07):
Helloh uh bye.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
By the way, missus Bennie, we understand that you're gonna
be on the.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
Network here with us.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Yes, yes, that's right.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Well miss Benny, me and and I just won't wish
you a.
Speaker 4 (09:31):
Lot of luck.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
Well, thank you boys, thank you very much.
Speaker 4 (09:35):
Say Handy.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
That missus BENNI is supposed to be a big comedian.
Speaker 10 (09:39):
Uh he didn't say nothing funny.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
Well, just like I told James, he ain't nothing without Rochester.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Were you boys talking to me?
Speaker 8 (10:00):
No?
Speaker 1 (10:01):
No, no, goodbye, goodbye?
Speaker 2 (10:13):
Oh gosh, I cut your wreck? Say Mary, what is it?
Jack amoson? And you've been on the air for over
twenty years as comedian, you know they didn't say anything funny.
Speaker 7 (10:22):
And well, it's just like I told you. They ain't
nothing without the Kingfish.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
Yeah, well, here we are Studio B.
Speaker 7 (10:33):
Well, I want to see what my dressing room is like.
I'll meetulated.
Speaker 5 (10:35):
Okay, oh Bell, hold it, fellow Wall, I'd break it
up from her.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
Hi you, Jackson.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Welcome to Patwillo's intercychone Love fell Phil. I want to
talk to you me. Yeah, look at here. It is
a new year. We're starting on a new network. So Phil,
you've got to do something about your music.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
And why what's wrong with my lads?
Speaker 2 (11:07):
Look? Fail, Look, I don't expect her to wear full
dress suits. I don't even want him to wear Kaser jackets.
But for the love of Heaven, why don't they wear tie? Well, Jackson,
most of these boys are out on parole and they
don't want nothing around their neck with a nod in it.
That I can understand. But the worst of all is
your pal Rimley. He's a discret, all of Jackson. Just
(11:27):
a minute, now, hold it, calm down a little bit.
Don't say nothing about Frankie. You ought to be a
little more considerate of it.
Speaker 4 (11:34):
Since he was a baby.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
Poor Frankie never had no mother or father.
Speaker 2 (11:39):
Oh come, I'm sorry, Bill, I didn't know that Remley
was an orphan.
Speaker 11 (11:42):
You know.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
Oh he ain't no orphan.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
When he was born, his folks took one look at
him and joined parents anonymous.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
Look, Pail, there's.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
So much work to be done. I'm so nervous now.
I want to make sure that you picks a good
number for our first program. What are you and the
boys gonna play? Jackson?
Speaker 4 (11:56):
Have been given them plenty of thought.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
In fact, I've been thinking about it all week, and
I finally decided on That's what I like about this
stuck all right, Phil, don't shot that over here. I
haven't told you this before, but that song is what
drove Edgar Bergen into retirement, now believe me. Okay, Jackson, Okay,
(12:19):
if that's the way you feel about it, I look
about that dialogue stuff on this show. Shall we try
that old running gag about hunting bear? No? No, no,
you hooked me on that too often. But hey, wait
a minute, I'll tell you. Let's do it at this time, Phil,
let me pull it on you. You see, I'll start
by saying, hello, Phil, would you like to come hunting
with me? Up? In the high Sierras.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
Certainly, Jackson, are you gonna hunt Moose?
Speaker 2 (12:38):
No, I'm going to move Phil.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
That's not right. What am I supposed to ask you?
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Are you gonna hunt bear?
Speaker 1 (12:49):
No, I'll be wearing buttons and.
Speaker 12 (12:50):
Bowls, Harrison make I'll let you sing your song on
this network, but you will I'll sum up somewhere.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Like the last time I want to hear that joke.
Now play any number you want. I gotta go out
and look for mister Paley.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
All right, fellas, look, let's run over Dennis's song first.
You already kids.
Speaker 5 (13:10):
Yeah, I'm ready to.
Speaker 4 (13:19):
Look up. Look up.
Speaker 11 (13:23):
When everything's looking done. Whenever you're old, let everything go
come out of that to me from look up, look up.
Whenever those poles are great, it's gonna be fun. Whenever
that tongue starts chasing those plows away.
Speaker 13 (13:45):
There's no room rowland looms.
Speaker 11 (13:48):
Or shake him your bounds to take him, cry, smile
or you. But whatever you do, look up, look up,
don't ever give up. The fine when everything's wrong is
never too long till everything turns off.
Speaker 13 (14:10):
It's for whatever you do. Look, there's no room for
(14:31):
all angles.
Speaker 11 (14:32):
So shake him.
Speaker 13 (14:34):
You're bound to take him. Go try a smile or two.
Speaker 11 (14:40):
But whatever you do.
Speaker 8 (14:42):
Look up, look up.
Speaker 11 (14:45):
Don't ever give up the fine when everything's wrong. It's
never too long till everything turn lord, whatever you do.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Ah see, Mary, I've looked all over for mister Paley
here he is the head of the whole Columbia network.
(15:21):
I can't find him. He must be around here someplace.
Speaker 7 (15:24):
Well, let's go and rehearse the script first. We haven't
got much time, you.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Know, Okay, you know, the closer we get to do
in the broadcast, the more nervous I am. Come on,
let's get back into the direction. Say who was that? Geanry,
Geen Audrey side?
Speaker 1 (15:47):
What a studio this is?
Speaker 2 (15:50):
His horse has a better dressing room than I had.
There's gonna be trouble. Come on, Mary, I want to
see mister Paley before we go on the air. And
then we'll go.
Speaker 10 (15:58):
Mister Benny, I just finished rehearsing my.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Sol Huh Hello, don I mean Phil Jacket's Dennis? Oh? Yes, yeah,
so Dennis. Hey wait a minute, Denn, why are you
wearing the top half white crye and tails.
Speaker 10 (16:10):
Well it's our first show on CBS, and I thought
i'd dress up.
Speaker 7 (16:13):
Well, Dennis, I think that's very nice that you're renting
a full dress suit for our first broadcast. Oh I
didn't read it. This is the suit my father got
married in. Oh well, Dennis, you should have had it clean.
There's catsup on the lapel.
Speaker 10 (16:25):
Well that's not catsup. My father wouldn't say I do,
and my mother punched him in the nose.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
Look look, Phil, I mean, Dennis. Look, I'm glad you're
dressed up for our first show.
Speaker 10 (16:40):
Well, you know, mister Benny, Charlie McCarthy starts on CBS
today too.
Speaker 2 (16:43):
No, no, Dennis, Now, don't get mixed up. I'm the
only one who's starting today, not Charlie McCarthy. Well, that's funny.
Speaker 10 (16:50):
I heard the dorman say to somebody, we've got that
dummy over here.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Now, yeah, I wonder who he meant.
Speaker 10 (17:02):
Well, it isn't Mary, so it must be.
Speaker 11 (17:04):
Either you or me.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Dennis. Don't bother me with that talk. I've got to
go in the John John.
Speaker 7 (17:11):
Did you notice it?
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Certainly?
Speaker 4 (17:13):
Mary?
Speaker 2 (17:13):
I noticed them in I song.
Speaker 7 (17:15):
Why don't you ask?
Speaker 2 (17:16):
No, No, Mary, you ask him, not me? All right,
I will, Dennis, Dennis, I want to get something straight.
Look it you wanted to dress up for our first
broadcast at CBS. Is that right?
Speaker 10 (17:27):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (17:27):
Huh?
Speaker 2 (17:27):
So you put on your father's top half, white tie
and tail. Well, why are you wearing hip boots?
Speaker 10 (17:32):
I couldn't find the pants.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
Well, serves me right for asking anyway, I'll take one
more chance, Dennis, Why wear hip boots? Why didn't you
wear your own pants?
Speaker 10 (17:50):
I did, but I lost them by force of habit?
What as I passed NBC, I walked by, but my
pants walked in.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Come on and Mary, instead of talk him, I could
have seen mister Paley. Now let's go in and we'll.
Speaker 4 (18:03):
He Hello mister Bennie, Oh.
Speaker 2 (18:05):
Hello, hello, mister Kitzel, mister Kessel. What are you doing here?
Speaker 4 (18:15):
Mister Benny.
Speaker 14 (18:16):
I want to be among the fos to congratulate you
on moving to this network.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Well, thank you, thank you. I hope you approve the move,
do you say?
Speaker 14 (18:24):
Do immensely? CBS is my favorite network?
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Oh? You like their shows?
Speaker 14 (18:31):
Ooh yes, specially on Monday nights when they have my
friends Hoyman and Locks.
Speaker 5 (18:40):
That's uh, mister kits Lost, Locks, Locks, Locks, I like
them both.
Speaker 7 (18:45):
By the way, mister Kessel, did you enjoy New Year's Eve?
Speaker 14 (18:51):
I have a good time, but I think I had
wondering too many.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
Oh they were you were a little high.
Speaker 8 (18:58):
Hi.
Speaker 7 (19:00):
Oh my, I was stinking. I can't believe it. Yeah,
shame on me.
Speaker 14 (19:14):
And you know when I serve it up, I found
myself doing something terrible. I was kissing somebody's wife, poose mine.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Well, miss the kids.
Speaker 2 (19:25):
So we got to look over our strip before we
go on the air. It was nice meeting you again.
Speaker 14 (19:29):
Sealing is likewise mistoll being it.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye. Well, come on, Mary, let's go in.
We'll have to rush this before we get through. One
two three four one two three four. Hello Joe testing
testing one two three four? Hey, what are you doing?
I'm the engineer. I'm testing the microphones. Jack Benny will
(19:53):
be on the air in a few minutes. I know,
I know. Yeah, who wouldn't know what all this fuss
they're making?
Speaker 1 (19:58):
You think they were getting out pissed?
Speaker 2 (20:05):
Oh yeah, well, let me tell you something, buddy. I
happen to be Jack Jack Jack Olllo Mary, I mean
don don hello, excuse me, Don, I'm so nervous today.
Speaker 5 (20:13):
Well, I can understand that. Jack I'm genering myself. I've
got butterflies in my stomach.
Speaker 2 (20:18):
Have don You could have the Northwestern football team in
your stomach. They'd make more yards than they did in
the Rose Bowl. Now what do you want, Don?
Speaker 5 (20:26):
Well, Jack will be on there in a few minutes,
and you haven't run through the commercials yet.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
We can't do that. The audience has started coming in. Now,
well that's good Jack.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
We can get a reaction and see what we've got.
Speaker 14 (20:35):
Don.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
We're not going to go to Jack. You're in it,
I don't I am you mean?
Speaker 1 (20:41):
In the commercial?
Speaker 5 (20:42):
Yes, the boys are going to sing Frank Lesser's big song.
Here the slow Ball to China, Frank Lesser's song. Oh well,
that's great. Where are the sports?
Speaker 4 (20:49):
But here they are? Okay, take it.
Speaker 15 (20:52):
Boys song put me the one away in a moment.
Speaker 6 (21:02):
Too long to say that.
Speaker 16 (21:04):
We like to get you on the soul bus to
Glendale all to ourselves, care you and tell you about
Lucky Sight.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
You see we know you like him. L s Alisa,
that you said it? Why we are right all the time.
Speaker 16 (21:32):
We'll be biden all in that good old Saint direct.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
We like to get you on.
Speaker 16 (21:43):
A show man to man all by ourselves.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
We like to get you me on the soul freight
to Frisco, see Ah, by ourselves. I can hardly wait
open up that golden gate.
Speaker 16 (22:04):
To tell you all about that Sager.
Speaker 4 (22:09):
Please pay attention.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
I'm listening already at some rhyming. You get you on
the plane to Plainfield, Plainfield in most luckies all the way.
I was just tough and tough.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
How about this clever stuff.
Speaker 16 (22:27):
We never like to get you on a red shot
to shang har A rickche.
Speaker 6 (22:36):
We'll never make it.
Speaker 2 (22:49):
Gone done done.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
That was wonderful.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Listen, you know you better be prepared for an encore.
Speaker 1 (22:57):
And that's all Jack the boys. I'm prepared anymore lyrics.
Speaker 2 (23:00):
But we're only rehearsing. Can't they ad live as they
go along?
Speaker 1 (23:02):
How about it for.
Speaker 8 (23:07):
You?
Speaker 2 (23:07):
See you see now the audience likes the idea. They
want it all right, jacko bars will just have to
make it up.
Speaker 1 (23:13):
They's nothing prepared, That's what I mean.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
Ad lib something. Take it, fellas. What's the difference.
Speaker 5 (23:20):
We like to get you on the walk to walk
Egan all by.
Speaker 6 (23:29):
Gee.
Speaker 2 (23:29):
I'd love to go cousin Cliff and sister flow.
Speaker 1 (23:33):
And be understood. But what's the difference.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
You've messed it up already, But good, poor lesser to get.
Speaker 1 (23:44):
You on horse?
Speaker 2 (23:46):
That fell my horse?
Speaker 3 (23:48):
We want to hear.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
You on my door. I don't want to be.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
A shmoke like to get you on the sand which
to sandwich?
Speaker 6 (24:00):
I'll do.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Leave off the onions?
Speaker 1 (24:20):
You see? You see? Don you see? That was great?
Speaker 2 (24:23):
It's going to be swelling on the show stand by
wait three minutes, three minutes. I can't understand why mister
Payley didn't come down to seat you, and I'll be
a nervous wreck all through my first show.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
Two minutes and a half.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
How do you like that? One?
Speaker 11 (24:34):
Two?
Speaker 4 (24:34):
Three, four?
Speaker 10 (24:35):
Hello, Mom, Donna, get it's not microphone.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
I can't understand what. Oh that must be mister Kaylee.
Now come in, Come.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
In, yes, mister Benny.
Speaker 17 (24:48):
Yes, I'm Don Thornberg, the head of the Western Division
of the Columbia Broadcasting System.
Speaker 2 (24:53):
Oh, how do you do mister Thornton?
Speaker 11 (25:01):
What?
Speaker 8 (25:01):
Uh?
Speaker 13 (25:03):
What?
Speaker 2 (25:03):
What can I do for you?
Speaker 1 (25:05):
Well?
Speaker 17 (25:05):
I understand you've been looking for mister Paley. Yes, yes,
I have. Where where is he? Well, mister Paley is
in New York. He only comes out here on urgent business.
Speaker 2 (25:17):
Well, this is this is rather important, mister Thornburgh. But
perhaps you can help me.
Speaker 1 (25:27):
Well, I hope.
Speaker 13 (25:27):
So what is it?
Speaker 1 (25:29):
Well, well, yes, mister Benny, what is it? Well? Do
you have the authority to.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
Validate my parking lot ticket?
Speaker 1 (25:49):
Do you, mister Thornberg?
Speaker 15 (25:51):
Second, mister Thornberg, come back two seconds, mister the air.
Oh yeah, hello again, this is Jack Benny talking.
Speaker 4 (26:11):
Ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 5 (26:11):
Travel on our highways is increasing. It is now eleven
percent above the pre war peak. So be careful if
you drive the car or even if you take a walk.
Watch for traffic lights, observe safety and traffic regulations.
Speaker 4 (26:24):
The life you save may be your own. That will
Tobacca dress a moment.
Speaker 2 (26:31):
The first smocha Lucky to feel your level best.
Speaker 3 (26:34):
Smoke a Lucky to feel your level best. You see,
Lucky's fine tobacco picks you up when you're low, calms
you down when you're temps, put you on the right
level to feel and do your level best. It's good
to know that fine tobacco can do this for you,
and that's why it's so important that you select and
smoke the cigarette A fine tobacco, Lucky Strike or as
(26:55):
every smoker knows ls MFT, LS MFT, Lucky strike means
fine tobacco. The experts men who know tobacco look to
Lucky strike for their own personal smoking enjoyment. Yes, more
independent auctioneers, buyers and warehousemen smoke Luckies regularly than the
next two leading brands combined. So smoke a lucky to
(27:16):
feel your level best. That's how to get on a
lucky level where there's real joy in living, where it's
fun to be alive, the lucky level where you feel
your best.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
And do your best.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
Smoke a Lucky to feel your level best. Smoke a
Lucky to feel your level best.
Speaker 3 (27:30):
Get on the lucky level where it's fun to be alive.
Get a curtain of luckies and get started today.
Speaker 2 (27:41):
And now, ladies and gentlemen, not to be outdone by
the quartet, Mary and I have cooked up a little number.
Speaker 7 (27:50):
We'd like to get you to stay tuned on Sundays
and listen to ceb Air.
Speaker 2 (27:59):
It'll be such fun for you and me and everyone.
Speaker 7 (28:02):
Get you and tell you how much you'll have to fight.
Next comes old Blue Eyes Aim as you.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Were surely like well Andy.
Speaker 7 (28:13):
Then wait ontil you get Sam Spade through you and
guess when the villain will consis.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
I'm not going to say, you'll have to listen in today.
Speaker 10 (28:25):
Then comes Luigi, you'll hear him on CB.
Speaker 7 (28:31):
Tune in on CB.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
That's not our network.
Speaker 5 (28:50):
We start to listening to the Little Lucky Fly program,
Your Lucky Fly starring Ganomy on this network. And don't
forget on Saturday nights the Lucky Strike Hip Parade starring
Franks not back. There's there's CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting System
The Jack Benny program presented by Lucky Strike.
Speaker 2 (00:03):
There is a leble no no no, no, no no no.
Speaker 3 (00:08):
Men, smoke a Lucky to feel your level best. Smoke
a Lucky to feel your level best, your level best.
That's just how you'll feel when you light up a
Lucky Because Lucky's fine tobacco picks you up when you're low,
calms you down when you're tim.
Speaker 2 (00:23):
Put you on the right level to feel and do
your level best.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
It's important to you as a smoker to know that
fine tobacco can do this for you. And every smoker
knows ls n F T L S m f T
Lucky Strike means fine tobacco. Remember more independent tobacco experts, auctioneers, buyers,
and warehousemen smoke Lucky Strike regularly than the next two
leading bands combined. It's good to know that fine tobacco
(00:47):
picks you up when you're low, calms you down when
you're tim by putting you on the right.
Speaker 2 (00:52):
Level to feel and do your level best.
Speaker 1 (00:54):
That's the Lucky level.
Speaker 4 (00:56):
So smoke a Lucky to feel.
Speaker 1 (00:57):
Your level best.
Speaker 3 (00:58):
Yes, the next time you buy cigarettes, remember Lucky's Fine
tobacco put you on the right level. The lucky level
where you feel your level best and do your level best.
Welco lucky to feel your level best. Get on the
lucky level where it's fun to be alive.
Speaker 4 (01:12):
Get a carton of.
Speaker 3 (01:13):
Luckies and get started.
Speaker 5 (01:14):
Today the Lucky Strike Program starring Jack Benny with Mary Levison,
Phil Harris, Rochester, Dannis Staying.
Speaker 4 (01:28):
Here's Polly done. Welcome, ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 5 (01:46):
Today marks Jack Benny's first program on the Columbia Broadcasting System.
So let's go back a couple of hours and pick
up Jack and Marry on their way to the studio.
Speaker 2 (01:54):
Rochester is driving, ass Rochester, don't cross the double line
the top of that car. What's the matter with you.
Speaker 6 (02:06):
I'm riding as terrifully as I can.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Boys, Well, just watch it, that's all.
Speaker 7 (02:10):
Oh, for heaven's sake, Jack, calm down, don't be so nervous.
I'm not nervous, and stop pacing up and down on
the running board.
Speaker 2 (02:21):
Okay, Mary, I'll admit that I am nervous, and you
can't blame me. Today's my opening broadcast on CBS.
Speaker 7 (02:27):
All right, So you're opening on CBS.
Speaker 2 (02:29):
What do you mean? All right? Do you realize it's
the first time I program will be hurt in Alaska.
Speaker 7 (02:34):
So what I've yet to see a wall or smoking
a lucky strike?
Speaker 2 (02:41):
Oh yeah, I saw one last night.
Speaker 7 (02:44):
That was Jerry Kloonna, and.
Speaker 2 (02:47):
I'll have to apologize I threw him a fish. Anyway, Mary,
this is no time for joking. I'm upset.
Speaker 7 (02:53):
Oh, for heaven's sake, Jack, Why should you be worried?
You must have a million dollars down in your ball.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
I know, but I don't want to break up the
serial number. I mean, Mary, stop asking me questions, will you.
I'm in the Rochester. I don't want to have an
accident on the way to the studio. Now throw down.
Speaker 1 (03:15):
I'm only going twelve miles an hour. Don't give me that.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
What does it say on this pedometer made in.
Speaker 7 (03:25):
I mean, besides that, Jack, you're working yourself into a
breakdown Rochester. See if you get something on the radio.
So mister Benny can relax.
Speaker 2 (03:34):
I conclude another broadcast by your friendly philosopher, and now
for a special announcement. Remember only two more hours and
Jack Benny will be on CBS.
Speaker 1 (03:44):
Turn that off.
Speaker 2 (03:46):
That's all he been broadcasting for the past week. Six
more days for Jack then five more days for Jack Benny,
four more days, two more hours.
Speaker 7 (03:54):
Well, Jack, if you don't like it, make him stop us.
Speaker 2 (03:57):
I will not.
Speaker 7 (04:06):
I can't figure you out. First you don't like it,
then you do like it. I've never seen you this way.
Speaker 1 (04:12):
He's been a nervous wreck all week, missus Livingston. Last
night he didn't sleep a wink. He just kept tossing
and turning and whippering like a baby.
Speaker 7 (04:19):
Well, I wasn't anything you could do.
Speaker 2 (04:20):
Far.
Speaker 1 (04:21):
I tried everything. I even threw him over my shoulder
and burnt in plenty.
Speaker 2 (04:29):
Ah, Rochester, stop exaggerating.
Speaker 1 (04:31):
I'm not exaggerating.
Speaker 8 (04:32):
Boss.
Speaker 1 (04:33):
You hadn't been talking in.
Speaker 7 (04:34):
Your sleep, talking in his sleep?
Speaker 1 (04:36):
Yeah, Miss Levingston, who is William Paley?
Speaker 7 (04:39):
William Paley's ahead of the Columbia Broadcasting system?
Speaker 2 (04:42):
Why he has now replaced Halamar and mister Benny's dream
stop Rochester? I never dreamed about mister Paley.
Speaker 1 (04:53):
Yes you did, Boss.
Speaker 9 (04:54):
All night long, you kept saying, DA tell me why
day Rochester?
Speaker 2 (05:01):
And I upset enough as it is without your discussing.
Oh fine, that's all I need now a traffic Rochester.
We wanted to pull over to the curve.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
Caught. You didn't die.
Speaker 2 (05:27):
What's the matter, officer? Were we speeding?
Speaker 1 (05:29):
Don't flatter yourself. You went through a red light, Officer.
The light was glean when we stared through the intersection.
I know, but it changed twice before this gelope got.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Acron Look, officer, I'm afraid this is my fault. I'm
in a hurt.
Speaker 1 (05:44):
I'm talking to the driver, so'll keep your.
Speaker 6 (05:46):
But wait a minute.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
You're Jack Fanny, aren't you.
Speaker 2 (05:51):
Yes, yes, I am.
Speaker 9 (05:52):
Well then you must be on your way to the
studio to do your first broadcast for CBS.
Speaker 2 (05:57):
That's right.
Speaker 1 (05:58):
Well, only a lot would give you a ticket on
a day like this.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
Well, thank you.
Speaker 9 (06:03):
It's j Can's with Officer Sam Loud. What I'm sorry,
mister Benny. But beauty is duty now I'll right this.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Calling all cars, calling all.
Speaker 1 (06:20):
Cars, excuse me a minute. This may be important.
Speaker 2 (06:23):
Attention all officers. There has been a hold up on
fourth and Olive. Investigate a double murder at Hill and Grand.
Only two more hours and Jack Benny will be on CBS. Gee,
they have an announcement on your radio too. He the
police must like my program.
Speaker 9 (06:39):
Yes, they used it down at headquarters for the third degree, third.
Speaker 1 (06:44):
Degree twice, I confessed and I didn't even do anything. Well,
you can go, mister Benny, and I won't give you
a ticket. I can't stand the tears in those big
blue eyes.
Speaker 2 (06:58):
Thank you. Go ahead, Rochester, drive on just.
Speaker 1 (07:01):
The second, Boss, I've got to start the motive.
Speaker 7 (07:03):
Jee wiz, Jack. I hope you don't have trouble starting
it like you always do.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
Don't worry about that me. Yesterday I had the motor tuned.
Go ahead, Rochester started?
Speaker 7 (07:41):
Who tuned it?
Speaker 8 (07:42):
Spike Jones?
Speaker 2 (07:45):
Mary?
Speaker 4 (07:45):
Please?
Speaker 2 (07:46):
Rochester cryet again? Will you don't worry, Boss, I'll get
this motor started.
Speaker 6 (07:50):
But close your eyes.
Speaker 2 (07:51):
Why I'm gonna use the whip.
Speaker 1 (07:54):
I don't care what you use.
Speaker 2 (07:56):
Let's get to the studio. See Mary. They've got a
nice lot here, haven't they. Yeah, here's your parking take.
Speaker 1 (08:09):
It, mister.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
Thank you, and boy, be careful when you park my car.
Why come on, Mary.
Speaker 7 (08:20):
Say Jack, as we drove in, did you see that
big sign on the building?
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Big sign? Or what does it say?
Speaker 5 (08:26):
Jack?
Speaker 7 (08:26):
Benny has switched to CBS. Bill Harris has switched to Sternal.
Speaker 2 (08:32):
Oh yes, it was his New Year's resolution. Well, here's
the art of sentence, let's go in odor man. Yeah,
I'm Jack Benny.
Speaker 1 (08:41):
I don't care who you are. Wipe your feet.
Speaker 2 (08:46):
Well, look, when mister William Paley comes in, tell him
I want to see him right away, will you Okay,
we don't matter. Even though I'm trying to keep calm,
I can't help being nervous today. I guess every actor feels.
Speaker 7 (08:58):
Oh Jack, who's coming down the hall?
Speaker 2 (09:00):
Amos Andy, Oh yeah, they're coming this way. Hello amos, Hello,
Miss Benny, Hello, Miss Livingston.
Speaker 8 (09:07):
Helloh uh bye.
Speaker 2 (09:23):
By the way, missus Bennie, we understand that you're gonna
be on the.
Speaker 1 (09:26):
Network here with us.
Speaker 2 (09:28):
Yes, yes, that's right.
Speaker 1 (09:29):
Well miss Benny, me and and I just won't wish
you a.
Speaker 4 (09:31):
Lot of luck.
Speaker 2 (09:32):
Well, thank you boys, thank you very much.
Speaker 4 (09:35):
Say Handy.
Speaker 1 (09:37):
That missus BENNI is supposed to be a big comedian.
Speaker 10 (09:39):
Uh he didn't say nothing funny.
Speaker 2 (09:46):
Well, just like I told James, he ain't nothing without Rochester.
Speaker 1 (09:58):
Were you boys talking to me?
Speaker 8 (10:00):
No?
Speaker 1 (10:01):
No, no, goodbye, goodbye?
Speaker 2 (10:13):
Oh gosh, I cut your wreck? Say Mary, what is it?
Jack amoson? And you've been on the air for over
twenty years as comedian, you know they didn't say anything funny.
Speaker 7 (10:22):
And well, it's just like I told you. They ain't
nothing without the Kingfish.
Speaker 1 (10:28):
Yeah, well, here we are Studio B.
Speaker 7 (10:33):
Well, I want to see what my dressing room is like.
I'll meetulated.
Speaker 5 (10:35):
Okay, oh Bell, hold it, fellow Wall, I'd break it
up from her.
Speaker 1 (10:43):
Hi you, Jackson.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Welcome to Patwillo's intercychone Love fell Phil. I want to
talk to you me. Yeah, look at here. It is
a new year. We're starting on a new network. So Phil,
you've got to do something about your music.
Speaker 1 (11:00):
And why what's wrong with my lads?
Speaker 2 (11:07):
Look? Fail, Look, I don't expect her to wear full
dress suits. I don't even want him to wear Kaser jackets.
But for the love of Heaven, why don't they wear tie? Well, Jackson,
most of these boys are out on parole and they
don't want nothing around their neck with a nod in it.
That I can understand. But the worst of all is
your pal Rimley. He's a discret, all of Jackson. Just
(11:27):
a minute, now, hold it, calm down a little bit.
Don't say nothing about Frankie. You ought to be a
little more considerate of it.
Speaker 4 (11:34):
Since he was a baby.
Speaker 1 (11:36):
Poor Frankie never had no mother or father.
Speaker 2 (11:39):
Oh come, I'm sorry, Bill, I didn't know that Remley
was an orphan.
Speaker 11 (11:42):
You know.
Speaker 1 (11:42):
Oh he ain't no orphan.
Speaker 2 (11:43):
When he was born, his folks took one look at
him and joined parents anonymous.
Speaker 1 (11:49):
Look, Pail, there's.
Speaker 2 (11:50):
So much work to be done. I'm so nervous now.
I want to make sure that you picks a good
number for our first program. What are you and the
boys gonna play? Jackson?
Speaker 4 (11:56):
Have been given them plenty of thought.
Speaker 2 (11:58):
In fact, I've been thinking about it all week, and
I finally decided on That's what I like about this
stuck all right, Phil, don't shot that over here. I
haven't told you this before, but that song is what
drove Edgar Bergen into retirement, now believe me. Okay, Jackson, Okay,
(12:19):
if that's the way you feel about it, I look
about that dialogue stuff on this show. Shall we try
that old running gag about hunting bear? No? No, no,
you hooked me on that too often. But hey, wait
a minute, I'll tell you. Let's do it at this time, Phil,
let me pull it on you. You see, I'll start
by saying, hello, Phil, would you like to come hunting
with me? Up? In the high Sierras.
Speaker 1 (12:36):
Certainly, Jackson, are you gonna hunt Moose?
Speaker 2 (12:38):
No, I'm going to move Phil.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
That's not right. What am I supposed to ask you?
Speaker 2 (12:47):
Are you gonna hunt bear?
Speaker 1 (12:49):
No, I'll be wearing buttons and.
Speaker 12 (12:50):
Bowls, Harrison make I'll let you sing your song on
this network, but you will I'll sum up somewhere.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
Like the last time I want to hear that joke.
Now play any number you want. I gotta go out
and look for mister Paley.
Speaker 1 (13:07):
All right, fellas, look, let's run over Dennis's song first.
You already kids.
Speaker 5 (13:10):
Yeah, I'm ready to.
Speaker 4 (13:19):
Look up. Look up.
Speaker 11 (13:23):
When everything's looking done. Whenever you're old, let everything go
come out of that to me from look up, look up.
Whenever those poles are great, it's gonna be fun. Whenever
that tongue starts chasing those plows away.
Speaker 13 (13:45):
There's no room rowland looms.
Speaker 11 (13:48):
Or shake him your bounds to take him, cry, smile
or you. But whatever you do, look up, look up,
don't ever give up. The fine when everything's wrong is
never too long till everything turns off.
Speaker 13 (14:10):
It's for whatever you do. Look, there's no room for
(14:31):
all angles.
Speaker 11 (14:32):
So shake him.
Speaker 13 (14:34):
You're bound to take him. Go try a smile or two.
Speaker 11 (14:40):
But whatever you do.
Speaker 8 (14:42):
Look up, look up.
Speaker 11 (14:45):
Don't ever give up the fine when everything's wrong. It's
never too long till everything turn lord, whatever you do.
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Ah see, Mary, I've looked all over for mister Paley
here he is the head of the whole Columbia network.
(15:21):
I can't find him. He must be around here someplace.
Speaker 7 (15:24):
Well, let's go and rehearse the script first. We haven't
got much time, you.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Know, Okay, you know, the closer we get to do
in the broadcast, the more nervous I am. Come on,
let's get back into the direction. Say who was that? Geanry,
Geen Audrey side?
Speaker 1 (15:47):
What a studio this is?
Speaker 2 (15:50):
His horse has a better dressing room than I had.
There's gonna be trouble. Come on, Mary, I want to
see mister Paley before we go on the air. And
then we'll go.
Speaker 10 (15:58):
Mister Benny, I just finished rehearsing my.
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Sol Huh Hello, don I mean Phil Jacket's Dennis? Oh? Yes, yeah,
so Dennis. Hey wait a minute, Denn, why are you
wearing the top half white crye and tails.
Speaker 10 (16:10):
Well it's our first show on CBS, and I thought
i'd dress up.
Speaker 7 (16:13):
Well, Dennis, I think that's very nice that you're renting
a full dress suit for our first broadcast. Oh I
didn't read it. This is the suit my father got
married in. Oh well, Dennis, you should have had it clean.
There's catsup on the lapel.
Speaker 10 (16:25):
Well that's not catsup. My father wouldn't say I do,
and my mother punched him in the nose.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
Look look, Phil, I mean, Dennis. Look, I'm glad you're
dressed up for our first show.
Speaker 10 (16:40):
Well, you know, mister Benny, Charlie McCarthy starts on CBS
today too.
Speaker 2 (16:43):
No, no, Dennis, Now, don't get mixed up. I'm the
only one who's starting today, not Charlie McCarthy. Well, that's funny.
Speaker 10 (16:50):
I heard the dorman say to somebody, we've got that
dummy over here.
Speaker 2 (16:52):
Now, yeah, I wonder who he meant.
Speaker 10 (17:02):
Well, it isn't Mary, so it must be.
Speaker 11 (17:04):
Either you or me.
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Dennis. Don't bother me with that talk. I've got to
go in the John John.
Speaker 7 (17:11):
Did you notice it?
Speaker 2 (17:12):
Certainly?
Speaker 4 (17:13):
Mary?
Speaker 2 (17:13):
I noticed them in I song.
Speaker 7 (17:15):
Why don't you ask?
Speaker 2 (17:16):
No, No, Mary, you ask him, not me? All right,
I will, Dennis, Dennis, I want to get something straight.
Look it you wanted to dress up for our first
broadcast at CBS. Is that right?
Speaker 10 (17:27):
Uh?
Speaker 1 (17:27):
Huh?
Speaker 2 (17:27):
So you put on your father's top half, white tie
and tail. Well, why are you wearing hip boots?
Speaker 10 (17:32):
I couldn't find the pants.
Speaker 2 (17:43):
Well, serves me right for asking anyway, I'll take one
more chance, Dennis, Why wear hip boots? Why didn't you
wear your own pants?
Speaker 10 (17:50):
I did, but I lost them by force of habit?
What as I passed NBC, I walked by, but my
pants walked in.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Come on and Mary, instead of talk him, I could
have seen mister Paley. Now let's go in and we'll.
Speaker 4 (18:03):
He Hello mister Bennie, Oh.
Speaker 2 (18:05):
Hello, hello, mister Kitzel, mister Kessel. What are you doing here?
Speaker 4 (18:15):
Mister Benny.
Speaker 14 (18:16):
I want to be among the fos to congratulate you
on moving to this network.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Well, thank you, thank you. I hope you approve the move,
do you say?
Speaker 14 (18:24):
Do immensely? CBS is my favorite network?
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Oh? You like their shows?
Speaker 14 (18:31):
Ooh yes, specially on Monday nights when they have my
friends Hoyman and Locks.
Speaker 5 (18:40):
That's uh, mister kits Lost, Locks, Locks, Locks, I like
them both.
Speaker 7 (18:45):
By the way, mister Kessel, did you enjoy New Year's Eve?
Speaker 14 (18:51):
I have a good time, but I think I had
wondering too many.
Speaker 2 (18:56):
Oh they were you were a little high.
Speaker 8 (18:58):
Hi.
Speaker 7 (19:00):
Oh my, I was stinking. I can't believe it. Yeah,
shame on me.
Speaker 14 (19:14):
And you know when I serve it up, I found
myself doing something terrible. I was kissing somebody's wife, poose mine.
Speaker 1 (19:24):
Well, miss the kids.
Speaker 2 (19:25):
So we got to look over our strip before we
go on the air. It was nice meeting you again.
Speaker 14 (19:29):
Sealing is likewise mistoll being it.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye. Well, come on, Mary, let's go in.
We'll have to rush this before we get through. One
two three four one two three four. Hello Joe testing
testing one two three four? Hey, what are you doing?
I'm the engineer. I'm testing the microphones. Jack Benny will
(19:53):
be on the air in a few minutes. I know,
I know. Yeah, who wouldn't know what all this fuss
they're making?
Speaker 1 (19:58):
You think they were getting out pissed?
Speaker 2 (20:05):
Oh yeah, well, let me tell you something, buddy. I
happen to be Jack Jack Jack Olllo Mary, I mean
don don hello, excuse me, Don, I'm so nervous today.
Speaker 5 (20:13):
Well, I can understand that. Jack I'm genering myself. I've
got butterflies in my stomach.
Speaker 2 (20:18):
Have don You could have the Northwestern football team in
your stomach. They'd make more yards than they did in
the Rose Bowl. Now what do you want, Don?
Speaker 5 (20:26):
Well, Jack will be on there in a few minutes,
and you haven't run through the commercials yet.
Speaker 2 (20:29):
We can't do that. The audience has started coming in. Now,
well that's good Jack.
Speaker 1 (20:33):
We can get a reaction and see what we've got.
Speaker 14 (20:35):
Don.
Speaker 2 (20:35):
We're not going to go to Jack. You're in it,
I don't I am you mean?
Speaker 1 (20:41):
In the commercial?
Speaker 5 (20:42):
Yes, the boys are going to sing Frank Lesser's big song.
Here the slow Ball to China, Frank Lesser's song. Oh well,
that's great. Where are the sports?
Speaker 4 (20:49):
But here they are? Okay, take it.
Speaker 15 (20:52):
Boys song put me the one away in a moment.
Speaker 6 (21:02):
Too long to say that.
Speaker 16 (21:04):
We like to get you on the soul bus to
Glendale all to ourselves, care you and tell you about
Lucky Sight.
Speaker 1 (21:20):
You see we know you like him. L s Alisa,
that you said it? Why we are right all the time.
Speaker 16 (21:32):
We'll be biden all in that good old Saint direct.
Speaker 1 (21:40):
We like to get you on.
Speaker 16 (21:43):
A show man to man all by ourselves.
Speaker 2 (21:52):
We like to get you me on the soul freight
to Frisco, see Ah, by ourselves. I can hardly wait
open up that golden gate.
Speaker 16 (22:04):
To tell you all about that Sager.
Speaker 4 (22:09):
Please pay attention.
Speaker 2 (22:12):
I'm listening already at some rhyming. You get you on
the plane to Plainfield, Plainfield in most luckies all the way.
I was just tough and tough.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
How about this clever stuff.
Speaker 16 (22:27):
We never like to get you on a red shot
to shang har A rickche.
Speaker 6 (22:36):
We'll never make it.
Speaker 2 (22:49):
Gone done done.
Speaker 1 (22:54):
That was wonderful.
Speaker 2 (22:55):
Listen, you know you better be prepared for an encore.
Speaker 1 (22:57):
And that's all Jack the boys. I'm prepared anymore lyrics.
Speaker 2 (23:00):
But we're only rehearsing. Can't they ad live as they
go along?
Speaker 1 (23:02):
How about it for.
Speaker 8 (23:07):
You?
Speaker 2 (23:07):
See you see now the audience likes the idea. They
want it all right, jacko bars will just have to
make it up.
Speaker 1 (23:13):
They's nothing prepared, That's what I mean.
Speaker 2 (23:15):
Ad lib something. Take it, fellas. What's the difference.
Speaker 5 (23:20):
We like to get you on the walk to walk
Egan all by.
Speaker 6 (23:29):
Gee.
Speaker 2 (23:29):
I'd love to go cousin Cliff and sister flow.
Speaker 1 (23:33):
And be understood. But what's the difference.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
You've messed it up already, But good, poor lesser to get.
Speaker 1 (23:44):
You on horse?
Speaker 2 (23:46):
That fell my horse?
Speaker 3 (23:48):
We want to hear.
Speaker 2 (23:50):
You on my door. I don't want to be.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
A shmoke like to get you on the sand which
to sandwich?
Speaker 6 (24:00):
I'll do.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Leave off the onions?
Speaker 1 (24:20):
You see? You see? Don you see? That was great?
Speaker 2 (24:23):
It's going to be swelling on the show stand by
wait three minutes, three minutes. I can't understand why mister
Payley didn't come down to seat you, and I'll be
a nervous wreck all through my first show.
Speaker 1 (24:31):
Two minutes and a half.
Speaker 2 (24:32):
How do you like that? One?
Speaker 11 (24:34):
Two?
Speaker 4 (24:34):
Three, four?
Speaker 10 (24:35):
Hello, Mom, Donna, get it's not microphone.
Speaker 2 (24:40):
I can't understand what. Oh that must be mister Kaylee.
Now come in, Come.
Speaker 1 (24:45):
In, yes, mister Benny.
Speaker 17 (24:48):
Yes, I'm Don Thornberg, the head of the Western Division
of the Columbia Broadcasting System.
Speaker 2 (24:53):
Oh, how do you do mister Thornton?
Speaker 11 (25:01):
What?
Speaker 8 (25:01):
Uh?
Speaker 13 (25:03):
What?
Speaker 2 (25:03):
What can I do for you?
Speaker 1 (25:05):
Well?
Speaker 17 (25:05):
I understand you've been looking for mister Paley. Yes, yes,
I have. Where where is he? Well, mister Paley is
in New York. He only comes out here on urgent business.
Speaker 2 (25:17):
Well, this is this is rather important, mister Thornburgh. But
perhaps you can help me.
Speaker 1 (25:27):
Well, I hope.
Speaker 13 (25:27):
So what is it?
Speaker 1 (25:29):
Well, well, yes, mister Benny, what is it? Well? Do
you have the authority to.
Speaker 2 (25:39):
Validate my parking lot ticket?
Speaker 1 (25:49):
Do you, mister Thornberg?
Speaker 15 (25:51):
Second, mister Thornberg, come back two seconds, mister the air.
Oh yeah, hello again, this is Jack Benny talking.
Speaker 4 (26:11):
Ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 5 (26:11):
Travel on our highways is increasing. It is now eleven
percent above the pre war peak. So be careful if
you drive the car or even if you take a walk.
Watch for traffic lights, observe safety and traffic regulations.
Speaker 4 (26:24):
The life you save may be your own. That will
Tobacca dress a moment.
Speaker 2 (26:31):
The first smocha Lucky to feel your level best.
Speaker 3 (26:34):
Smoke a Lucky to feel your level best. You see,
Lucky's fine tobacco picks you up when you're low, calms
you down when you're temps, put you on the right
level to feel and do your level best. It's good
to know that fine tobacco can do this for you,
and that's why it's so important that you select and
smoke the cigarette A fine tobacco, Lucky Strike or as
(26:55):
every smoker knows ls MFT, LS MFT, Lucky strike means
fine tobacco. The experts men who know tobacco look to
Lucky strike for their own personal smoking enjoyment. Yes, more
independent auctioneers, buyers and warehousemen smoke Luckies regularly than the
next two leading brands combined. So smoke a lucky to
(27:16):
feel your level best. That's how to get on a
lucky level where there's real joy in living, where it's
fun to be alive, the lucky level where you feel
your best.
Speaker 2 (27:25):
And do your best.
Speaker 1 (27:26):
Smoke a Lucky to feel your level best. Smoke a
Lucky to feel your level best.
Speaker 3 (27:30):
Get on the lucky level where it's fun to be alive.
Get a curtain of luckies and get started today.
Speaker 2 (27:41):
And now, ladies and gentlemen, not to be outdone by
the quartet, Mary and I have cooked up a little number.
Speaker 7 (27:50):
We'd like to get you to stay tuned on Sundays
and listen to ceb Air.
Speaker 2 (27:59):
It'll be such fun for you and me and everyone.
Speaker 7 (28:02):
Get you and tell you how much you'll have to fight.
Next comes old Blue Eyes Aim as you.
Speaker 2 (28:11):
Were surely like well Andy.
Speaker 7 (28:13):
Then wait ontil you get Sam Spade through you and
guess when the villain will consis.
Speaker 2 (28:22):
I'm not going to say, you'll have to listen in today.
Speaker 10 (28:25):
Then comes Luigi, you'll hear him on CB.
Speaker 7 (28:31):
Tune in on CB.
Speaker 2 (28:34):
That's not our network.
Speaker 5 (28:50):
We start to listening to the Little Lucky Fly program,
Your Lucky Fly starring Ganomy on this network. And don't
forget on Saturday nights the Lucky Strike Hip Parade starring
Franks not back. There's there's CBS, the Columbia Broadcasting System
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