February 17, 2025 • 14 mins
Hello to my Family listening on here. I had to hop on here and confess my dangerous mistake, and in the same breathe, testify of how good God is to me, even when I fall.
"And we know that God works all things together for the good of those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:38
"But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." Matthew 6:33
"And we know that God works all things together for the good of those who love Him, who are called according to His purpose." Romans 8:38
"But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you." Matthew 6:33
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Hi guys, This is jess on Jess in the mess
So sorry for the background noise. My son is still awake,
but my other two are down for the count. But
I needed to get on here and really testify about
(00:24):
something that's happened to me just in the past two days.
So yesterday was like a really scary, bad feeling day
for me, and just to be really honest, I found
myself just being super selfish and going into a lot
(00:51):
of self pity, frustration, irritability, offense, like just this bitter,
doubting attitude I don't know, and pride, prideful, prideful attitude,
(01:15):
and like it was like that the whole day. And
I know why because I was purposely running from God,
avoiding reading my word and reading or I wasn't praying
(01:39):
to him like I usually do. My eyes weren't on him.
Rather I wanted to do what I wanted to do,
and you know, not not serve others. Rather I wanted
to serve myself and like, what about me? And you know,
(02:04):
when do I ever get time or a break or
this or that. I was just really being self centered
and as a result from doing all those things, I
was in a lot of torment and a lot of
(02:24):
unnecessary stress and all of those bad feelings that I
named off. It was just, really, I just I felt
myself not choosing God as much as I know I
should have been, and know and know that I have
(02:46):
been getting in the good habit of doing keeping my
eyes on him. I'm not perfect, but I know, based
off of the verse and just based off of my
time in the recent revelations God has given me, I
know that He will keep him in perfect peace whoever's
(03:11):
mind is stayed on him because he trusts in Him.
And that verse, I'm I pull it up on my
phone real quick because I cannot think of it off
the top of my head. So that verse is Isaiah
twenty six three. And I just he really, he really
(03:37):
showed me that, and he brought that verse to my
mind just a little bit ago because like, and I
felt him too, like yesterday, just nudging me and whispering
to me, like all these little things. Like on a
regular day, if I would have been keeping my eyes
on him, those things would have just like melted my
(03:59):
head heart and made me cry. But yesterday my walls
were up and my heart was like hard. I felt
it and I was like just feeling really prideful in
my attitude, like I didn't want to, you know, feel
vulnerable and break down to God and let myself cry
(04:24):
and admit that, Oh I just got a little wink
from God. I know, like that. It couldn't have been
anything else or anyone else but him, you know, these
quiet whispers from him because his voice is not loud,
(04:46):
it's soft, gentle, and it's a whisper. And God is
a gentleman. He's not going to force himself on anybody
because we have free will and he is a gentleman.
He will wait until we welcome him in. And I
(05:12):
wasn't doing that yesterday. I wasn't seeking him as devoutly
as I desire to be doing every day. And it
was like a big scary wake up call because literally,
as I was not keeping my eyes on him purposely,
(05:36):
I left myself vulnerable to the enemy to like really
attack me and like where I would have been leaning
on God, like because I was facing some hard things yesterday.
It you know, validly they were hard things, but I
(05:56):
was not leaning on Him in facing those hard things,
which my walk yesterday would have been a lot lighter
and a lot more peaceful if I would have been
leaning on him, but instead I was like leaning on
myself and my own selfishness. I want to do this though, okay,
(06:17):
like it's all about me and what about me? And
it just seek the Kingdom of God, Seek Him and
his righteousness first, and he will add all of these
other things. Unto me. I'm just so grateful for how
(06:44):
merciful and patient and kind and understanding and just full
of grace and truth. Jesus is our God. His mercy
never runs out. It is just it is. I don't
(07:07):
like the word just because that I heard Joyce say
one time just means like, oh I'm just getting by
or that's just enough. But really God has everything that
I need. God is more than enough. And you know,
in the because I felt myself try to fight back
(07:33):
as much as I did the good fight of faith
and try to put my eyes back on him. It
says fix your eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher
of our faith. And I found myself really fighting to
do that. So I put on a sermon clip of
Joyce Meyer and lo and behold it was about the
(07:59):
title was what about me? So I clicked on that
because I felt God say, you know you need this,
so I clicked on it, and I remember in one
of the parts of the sermon, she said she was
(08:19):
quoting a song and it's by a real artist. It's
a real song, but I'm not really sure who it is,
but I'm just going to say the lyrics. She said,
I want to be happy, but I can't be happy
until I make you happy too. I don't know if
(08:44):
that's the exact words, but you get the message. And
I definitely got it too. It just really was convicting,
and I really needed it because, like that's why it says,
love the Lord your God, with all of your heart,
mind and soul and strength, and love one another, do
(09:11):
unto others as you would want them to do unto you.
And he says this not to give us a rule
or you know, it's not like that. It's to help
us because in doing the seeking him first, looking to him,
(09:33):
and relying on Him for every single thing we need,
even if it means, like the verse also says, dying
to ourselves. Jesus says, if any of you intend to
follow me, deny yourself and take up your cross. And
(09:57):
whenever he says, take up your cross. We sometimes in
our perception, think that that means, oh, you know, if
I have cancer that I guess that's just my cross
that I have to bear. Or if I've lost a
loved one, that's my cross I have to bear. But
I learned this from Joyce as well. She said that's
(10:20):
actually not true. Whenever he says take up your cross,
that means live an unselfish life, walk in love, seek
me first, deny yourself, put others, regard others even above yourself,
(10:46):
not meaning let people disrespect you for you walk over.
You know, we're not fools. But having wisdom and learning
from God of the universe, Jesus, he will teach us
all the things that we need to know in order
to have healthy relationships, boundaries, learning to let go of
(11:09):
things when we need to, and learning to take out
the old and bring in new, you know, like he'll
show us all those things. But my point is I
wasn't doing that yesterday, and it really blew my mind
the demonic attacks that were coming against me because I'm
(11:35):
the one who was not like I felt myself turning
to in the selfishness in the me turning to the selfishness.
I felt myself turning literally to the devil. And so
you know, a picture God being this way, and then
(11:55):
I'm but I'm turning this way to myself, trying to
trying to satisfy myself with whatever, and still not being
satisfied because I'm just only thinking about me. It all
revolves around me. But whenever I deny myself and I
turn to God and submit to him and resist the selfishness,
(12:20):
resist the devil, he will flee. And just like Isaiah
the verse I just said a little bit ago, as
I keep my mind on God and seek him first,
he will give me peace of mind. He will eliminate
the anxiety, the depression, the racing thoughts, just every negative
(12:43):
thing that sets itself up against the word of God.
It says, we demolish every argument and pretension that sets
itself up against the knowledge of God, and we make
every thought obedient to Christ. Jesus is so good. The
(13:04):
Holy Spirit is with me on this episode and everyone before,
And I'm very grateful to be able to testify of
how God is so good. He is such a good friend,
and he's such a protector and a helper. So I
(13:27):
just had to get on here and brag on God
and really just let other people know as well. If
you find yourself getting out of your rhythm with God
and kind of like backsliding or finding yourself going backwards,
you're not alone. It happens to all of us. But
we just got to keep on fighting that good fight.
(13:50):
Read our word, especially when we don't feel like it,
because you know that feeling is not coming from God.
It's coming from the enemy, you know. And we gotta
just keep our eyes on him no matter what we do.
We just need to keep our eyes on him. So
(14:10):
I'm going to leave you guys with that, and I
love you whoever's listening, and I pray for you. God
is always with us, wherever we are, wherever we go,
no matter what. I love you family. Bye Bye,
Hi guys, This is jess on Jess in the mess
So sorry for the background noise. My son is still awake,
but my other two are down for the count. But
I needed to get on here and really testify about
(00:24):
something that's happened to me just in the past two days.
So yesterday was like a really scary, bad feeling day
for me, and just to be really honest, I found
myself just being super selfish and going into a lot
(00:51):
of self pity, frustration, irritability, offense, like just this bitter,
doubting attitude I don't know, and pride, prideful, prideful attitude,
(01:15):
and like it was like that the whole day. And
I know why because I was purposely running from God,
avoiding reading my word and reading or I wasn't praying
(01:39):
to him like I usually do. My eyes weren't on him.
Rather I wanted to do what I wanted to do,
and you know, not not serve others. Rather I wanted
to serve myself and like, what about me? And you know,
(02:04):
when do I ever get time or a break or
this or that. I was just really being self centered
and as a result from doing all those things, I
was in a lot of torment and a lot of
(02:24):
unnecessary stress and all of those bad feelings that I
named off. It was just, really, I just I felt
myself not choosing God as much as I know I
should have been, and know and know that I have
(02:46):
been getting in the good habit of doing keeping my
eyes on him. I'm not perfect, but I know, based
off of the verse and just based off of my
time in the recent revelations God has given me, I
know that He will keep him in perfect peace whoever's
(03:11):
mind is stayed on him because he trusts in Him.
And that verse, I'm I pull it up on my
phone real quick because I cannot think of it off
the top of my head. So that verse is Isaiah
twenty six three. And I just he really, he really
(03:37):
showed me that, and he brought that verse to my
mind just a little bit ago because like, and I
felt him too, like yesterday, just nudging me and whispering
to me, like all these little things. Like on a
regular day, if I would have been keeping my eyes
on him, those things would have just like melted my
(03:59):
head heart and made me cry. But yesterday my walls
were up and my heart was like hard. I felt
it and I was like just feeling really prideful in
my attitude, like I didn't want to, you know, feel
vulnerable and break down to God and let myself cry
(04:24):
and admit that, Oh I just got a little wink
from God. I know, like that. It couldn't have been
anything else or anyone else but him, you know, these
quiet whispers from him because his voice is not loud,
(04:46):
it's soft, gentle, and it's a whisper. And God is
a gentleman. He's not going to force himself on anybody
because we have free will and he is a gentleman.
He will wait until we welcome him in. And I
(05:12):
wasn't doing that yesterday. I wasn't seeking him as devoutly
as I desire to be doing every day. And it
was like a big scary wake up call because literally,
as I was not keeping my eyes on him purposely,
(05:36):
I left myself vulnerable to the enemy to like really
attack me and like where I would have been leaning
on God, like because I was facing some hard things yesterday.
It you know, validly they were hard things, but I
(05:56):
was not leaning on Him in facing those hard things,
which my walk yesterday would have been a lot lighter
and a lot more peaceful if I would have been
leaning on him, but instead I was like leaning on
myself and my own selfishness. I want to do this though, okay,
(06:17):
like it's all about me and what about me? And
it just seek the Kingdom of God, Seek Him and
his righteousness first, and he will add all of these
other things. Unto me. I'm just so grateful for how
(06:44):
merciful and patient and kind and understanding and just full
of grace and truth. Jesus is our God. His mercy
never runs out. It is just it is. I don't
(07:07):
like the word just because that I heard Joyce say
one time just means like, oh I'm just getting by
or that's just enough. But really God has everything that
I need. God is more than enough. And you know,
in the because I felt myself try to fight back
(07:33):
as much as I did the good fight of faith
and try to put my eyes back on him. It
says fix your eyes on Jesus, the author and finisher
of our faith. And I found myself really fighting to
do that. So I put on a sermon clip of
Joyce Meyer and lo and behold it was about the
(07:59):
title was what about me? So I clicked on that
because I felt God say, you know you need this,
so I clicked on it, and I remember in one
of the parts of the sermon, she said she was
(08:19):
quoting a song and it's by a real artist. It's
a real song, but I'm not really sure who it is,
but I'm just going to say the lyrics. She said,
I want to be happy, but I can't be happy
until I make you happy too. I don't know if
(08:44):
that's the exact words, but you get the message. And
I definitely got it too. It just really was convicting,
and I really needed it because, like that's why it says,
love the Lord your God, with all of your heart,
mind and soul and strength, and love one another, do
(09:11):
unto others as you would want them to do unto you.
And he says this not to give us a rule
or you know, it's not like that. It's to help
us because in doing the seeking him first, looking to him,
(09:33):
and relying on Him for every single thing we need,
even if it means, like the verse also says, dying
to ourselves. Jesus says, if any of you intend to
follow me, deny yourself and take up your cross. And
(09:57):
whenever he says, take up your cross. We sometimes in
our perception, think that that means, oh, you know, if
I have cancer that I guess that's just my cross
that I have to bear. Or if I've lost a
loved one, that's my cross I have to bear. But
I learned this from Joyce as well. She said that's
(10:20):
actually not true. Whenever he says take up your cross,
that means live an unselfish life, walk in love, seek
me first, deny yourself, put others, regard others even above yourself,
(10:46):
not meaning let people disrespect you for you walk over.
You know, we're not fools. But having wisdom and learning
from God of the universe, Jesus, he will teach us
all the things that we need to know in order
to have healthy relationships, boundaries, learning to let go of
(11:09):
things when we need to, and learning to take out
the old and bring in new, you know, like he'll
show us all those things. But my point is I
wasn't doing that yesterday, and it really blew my mind
the demonic attacks that were coming against me because I'm
(11:35):
the one who was not like I felt myself turning
to in the selfishness in the me turning to the selfishness.
I felt myself turning literally to the devil. And so
you know, a picture God being this way, and then
(11:55):
I'm but I'm turning this way to myself, trying to
trying to satisfy myself with whatever, and still not being
satisfied because I'm just only thinking about me. It all
revolves around me. But whenever I deny myself and I
turn to God and submit to him and resist the selfishness,
(12:20):
resist the devil, he will flee. And just like Isaiah
the verse I just said a little bit ago, as
I keep my mind on God and seek him first,
he will give me peace of mind. He will eliminate
the anxiety, the depression, the racing thoughts, just every negative
(12:43):
thing that sets itself up against the word of God.
It says, we demolish every argument and pretension that sets
itself up against the knowledge of God, and we make
every thought obedient to Christ. Jesus is so good. The
(13:04):
Holy Spirit is with me on this episode and everyone before,
And I'm very grateful to be able to testify of
how God is so good. He is such a good friend,
and he's such a protector and a helper. So I
(13:27):
just had to get on here and brag on God
and really just let other people know as well. If
you find yourself getting out of your rhythm with God
and kind of like backsliding or finding yourself going backwards,
you're not alone. It happens to all of us. But
we just got to keep on fighting that good fight.
(13:50):
Read our word, especially when we don't feel like it,
because you know that feeling is not coming from God.
It's coming from the enemy, you know. And we gotta
just keep our eyes on him no matter what we do.
We just need to keep our eyes on him. So
(14:10):
I'm going to leave you guys with that, and I
love you whoever's listening, and I pray for you. God
is always with us, wherever we are, wherever we go,
no matter what. I love you family. Bye Bye,
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