Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:06):
Welcome to Journey with Joan, a podcast hosted by Joan Widen,
a medium, reiki master, and mind body spirit coach. Join
Joan on the transformative journey as she empowers listeners to
embrace their future, let go of the past, and create
a fulfilling life. Are you ready to embark on your
(00:27):
own journey of self discovery? Please welcome the host of
Journey with Joan, Joan.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Widen, Welcome. Thank you for joining me tonight. I'm have
being grateful to be here with you. Tonight. We're going
to talk about the mindset, having a mindset to get
(00:55):
our dreams and desires to attain the goals that we
want in our life. Now, most people when I say that,
they're just like, so, you're talking about this hippie stuff,
you know, peace and love and positivity, yay positivity all
(01:15):
the time. And a lot of people, such as Caroline
from North Dakota, she had asked me, how is that possible?
You can't be rainbows in sunshines all the time. How
can you make that work in an everyday life? Okay,
so I'm going to tell you you're right, It isn't possible
(01:40):
all the time. But most of the time. It's about
looking at the perspective, looking at how you react at things,
how we view things that come to us when people
say things to us, How do we internalize that for
our selves. Do we feel like people are always attacking us?
(02:04):
Do we feel like I can never get ahead? Or
do I feel like I'm a loser, or do I
feel you know, all these different things. So, yes, positivity,
but it's also part of within us, right, So this
mind of ours always is you know, peace, love, and war.
(02:29):
It came to me and I'm like, that's an interesting concept.
But it is because we when we have our downtime
and we're like, huh, this is nice, it's peaceful, it's relaxing.
Then we start to love ourselves and then we go
throughout our day and our day goes boom, right, like
keeps going, and then the war starts happening. Right, It's like,
(02:53):
I can't believe you did this with this. I can't
believe re reacted with this. I can't believe you allowed
so and so to do this to you, or you know,
instead of allowing them to do it to us, we go, wow,
they're right, I'm horrible at what I do or you know,
(03:15):
you start to believe in what other peoples have spewed
onto you. Right. So, when we decide that we need
to change things in our lives so we can create
and allow change to happen, we have to look within ourselves.
(03:39):
So again this is somewhat of an extension of last week, right,
And so it's the mindset, the mindset of changing how
we feel and how we can react to other people. Right. So,
for example, if we get bad news, we can decide
(04:03):
to go okay, and we can understand it and we
can feel it. And I'm not saying you're not allowed
to have emotions. Everyone has emotions, and you know what,
we need to honor those and we need to sit
with them, and we need to feel present within our
(04:24):
emotions and how we feel, because that's how we can
move on in our lives. That's how we move forward. Right.
It's when we have these emotions and it's like, you
know what, adults don't cry, or boys don't cry, or
you know, big girls don't cry. All these don't show
(04:46):
emotional crap. You know, we end up internalizing it, shoving
it down, and eventually we rupt, right, and life gets
super tough, It gets hard and we and then everything
(05:08):
is like a volcano. It just erupts and it just
goes right, And how how do we manage that? I'm
going to tell you it's gonna be way more difficult
to get through that if we let it faster and
we allow it to sit there in stew and right
(05:30):
versus if we sat with the emotion to begin with,
and then we allowed it and we're like, okay, all right,
we can process it. We can see how did I
react with it? Does it hurt? Yeah? Is that okay? Yes?
Can I have emotions about it? Absolutely? You can do
whatever you want. There is no wrong here, right, It's
(05:54):
really about how you interact or you re act within
yourselves and outwards towards others. Okay, what was it? So?
I came across a post from Kevin Kevin O'Leary. He
(06:17):
came up on my LinkedIn and it was perfect because I, well,
I was going to talk about mindset and his post
was if you don't love your job, you're screwed again.
So he I don't know if he's spiritual or not,
but from the business point of view, you look at that,
(06:40):
and he also says, hey, if you don't love what
you do or even enjoy it, You're screwed, yeah, because
you know what your body, your body is going to
react to that, and it won't really matter what we
try and do. Right. We can appease everyone, we could
do whatever, but at the end of the day we
(07:01):
come home and we have to sit and go okay,
you know, and people start internalizing it, and then it
goes My life is passing me by. I really don't
love my job, but you know what, it's comfortable. I'm
gonna stay with it because why I'm comfortable. It's a
(07:22):
decent paycheck, it has benefits, it is stable, and I
feel like I get a decent amount, and it's a
Monday to Friday, you name it. Right. We come up
with all the different excuses, right, but in our heart
(07:45):
of hearts, we know that that's not a right fit
and we would sometimes rather just do and feel miserable
and tell people that we're miserable then do something about it, right, right,
(08:07):
So then that job just becomes it starts feeling even
more daunting it. You know, you get up and you're like, oh,
I actually have to go back to work. I don't
really feel like going back to work today. You know,
maybe I should call them sick, do you know what
I mean? And then all these things, our work ethic
and our job performance starts to lag and starts to
(08:33):
diminish because we just don't have that gumption. But some
people like to coast. And that's okay too. What I'm
gonna tell you though, if you like to coast, it's
you're really just gonna coast. Right. You stay stagnant and
you stay still, and that's where you stay. Right. But
(08:53):
if you really want to grow and improve your life,
you really need to look within your self, right. And
so when you look within yourself, you kind of go,
what do I really want? Right? And okay, well is
this young girl full of shit? Right? Like she's saying, Okay, well,
(09:13):
I got to figure out some sort of positivity be
happy rah rah? Right, how does that work? Actually? You know,
it's not just about having to find the positivity, right,
It's about knowing you and understanding you as a person.
(09:35):
Right again, do you know what you really want to be? Right?
Most people, even in adulthood in their fifties, they're like,
I still don't know what you know? What I mean?
That's okay? And I feel like me pros. All right,
(10:01):
let me see, all right, so back at it, so focus,
all right? When we don't know what we want, that's okay. Again,
that gives us creative and outlet to figure out and
(10:24):
go what can we What do I really want? Do
I really want all this stuff? Do I really want this?
Do I want this? Right? And then it is about patience, right,
we need to be patient with ourselves because in order
for us to change our mindset, right, it takes at
(10:46):
least twenty one days to form a habit. Now for
all those fact chectors for when that wants to look,
I looked it up in the average, which it sayds
on Google to make to form a habit is around
sixty six days. Okay, So does that mean we have
(11:11):
to get angry with ourselves and tell ourselves like, hey,
I suck at this, I can't do this, this isn't right. No,
it's again, it's patience. It's showing yourself grace, loving yourself
enough to know that you know, things don't change overnight. Right.
(11:35):
If we like my children, my one of my daughters,
she used to suck her thumb, right, and that was
a super hard a habit to break, right, and it
just took reminding, hey, you don't you don't need to
soothe yourself with your thumb right? And were we angry
(11:59):
with her every time she did it? No? Right? And
it just slowly left right? And again, the more you
don't point out what's wrong in your life, it allows
us to be more gentle with ourselves, right, because every
(12:19):
time it's like you, you do something and you're like, oh,
I got angry with that. I can't believe it, and
you know, we keep at ourselves. It just makes us
feel angry and the anger starts the fester. And again
it's just like, I can't believe I did that right,
And the reels keep happening, and we keep seeing it
(12:42):
and envisioning it, and then we get even more angry
with ourselves. But you know, so in those cases it's
really time to just go stop, okay, go hey, right, yes,
how did I look at that? How did that go wrong?
(13:03):
It doesn't matter, it happened, it's okay, right, I'm not perfect.
You know, there are days where you know, it gets
really dicey and crazy and full of craziness. I have
three children, and so you know when everyone wants to
(13:27):
do something and you know the dogs are working, the
children want like attention. It just gets crazy and can
I lose my shit? I do? Yeah, absolutely right. But
then you know when you think about it and you
look back and you go, okay, well, you know, I'm
sorry I shouldn't have done that, But you know, I
(13:51):
also don't sit there and beat myself up about it
when I go to bed, right, And a lot of
people tend to do things like that. When we are
ready to you know, go to bed, we start winding
down and things just kind of okay. Right when we
(14:13):
wind down again, we start going through our day and
trying to figure out how we're gonna you know, go
to sleep, and how you know, organize our day and
then allow it for the next day to come in.
We're going to stop right there because we are going
to go on a break. We'll be back after these messages.
Speaker 1 (14:38):
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Speaker 2 (16:47):
Welcome back, and you are watching Journey with John and
I'm John Warnon. Thank you for listening. All right, So
we were talking about winding down and and being again
more you know, hard on ourselves, right, things like that. Again,
(17:08):
it takes patience, and all it does is take a
moment when you're in that in a rage or feeling
very frustrated or flustered, to take a deep breath. And
sometimes if you have to remove yourself from the situation, right,
(17:29):
go to the washroom. No one's ever gonna say anything
if you need to go to the washroom, Just remove
yourself from the situation. Then like collect yourself and then
go right. The only person that's judging you is you. Right,
people will just go okay, like it's not a big deal.
(17:53):
And again, the biggest thing people have told me is
it's none of your business. But other people think of you. Right,
So your journey is your journey and the people within
your group and your like your family and your close
knit friends, well, are they part of your journey? Absolutely right?
(18:16):
We need to surround ourselves with the people that support
us and will love us no matter what. Right, So
they support us, meaning you know, if they're having a
shitty day and you can only give let's say sixty
percent into your friendship at the moment, you know, your
(18:39):
friends should be able to give you that extra forty
do you know what I mean? To bring you up,
to boost you up so that you know everyone can thrive,
and then you can start to ticket that breath, that
breath of air, just to breathe, right, and even with
(18:59):
your spouse, right, same thing. Sometimes the day is just chaotic, right,
and just like today, it's interesting, right. I had to
deal with a lot of driving today and I just
felt like it was rush rush, rush here, going here,
(19:21):
going there, and I had to get ready to be
able to talk to you guys, And in my mind,
I'm going, oh my goodness, I can I do this? Right?
And one thought was should I or should I? Just
maybe I should just not do this? And you guys
(19:43):
can listen to a rerun, but you know, that's just
but that wasn't that's not an option, right, Well, it
is an option, don't get me wrong. However, when I
took a step back, and spirit likes to have fun
with me, and it kind of bugs like, likes to
(20:04):
joke and you know, bug me a little bit. My
radio when I was driving driving home from driving my
youngest to gymnastics practice training, the song from I Believe Alabama,
I'm in a hurry, And if you really listen to
(20:26):
those lyrics, it says I'm in a hurry and I
don't know why. All I have to do is live
and die. Right, So if we're really looking at that,
I kind of went, yeah, you're kind of right. Why
am I in such a hurry? Right? I know I
have pretty much everything set out laid out right, But
(20:51):
then I went, oh, yes, of course, because we are
talking about changing the mindset, right, And again here it is, I'm,
you know, just like you guys. It's still you know,
I'm learning every day and it's a continual growth up
until I die, right, And so it's easy it would
(21:15):
be easy for me to go no, you know, I
shouldn't have been able to do this, or it was
so and so's felt or it was blah blah blah
blah blah blah, right, or the kids, I don't maybe
they shouldn't go do their things, or you know, maybe
they should stay home from school because you know then
it would be easier for me. But really, when you
(21:36):
take a step back and take a deep breath and go, okay,
do I really need to do my ritual? Do I
really need have to do all these different things? No?
I don't. Right, I've had the topic. I was able
(21:57):
to do all those things, and you know, I could
have gotten really frustrated and really angry. And again that's
how life happens, right, So take a step back, take
a breath and go, okay, is it really that big
of a deal? Right? Okay, So positivity right when say,
(22:27):
for today, right, like it was just chaotic and crazy.
I felt like I was panicky, And you know, we
all get those ways where we can be panicked and
we can feel that manic, right like, oh my goodness, right,
feel like our head is like chopped off and we
don't know how to get going right. We just need
(22:54):
again we go, okay, what happened today? What was a
good thing about today? Right? One thing right. I you
know everyone was happy when they woke up today. The
sun is shining today, do you know what I mean?
It only takes one thing to help change that mindset
(23:17):
and does it again? It doesn't have to be Kumbaya
all the time. Right. You even curse it yourself and
go fuck John't like, get out of your head. That's okay,
no big deal? Right? Is it really that big deal? No? Right?
And so then you just oh, okay, just breathe, It's okay.
(23:41):
Right again, It takes an average of sixty six days
to change your mindset into getting into the groove into
allowing things to manifest to you know, attract, so you
(24:02):
can attract things to you, and that's okay. So I
also talked about aligning yourself with the people with people
around you that will support you and uplift you. Right, So,
(24:22):
when you start to change your mindset, you will notice
who doesn't fit in that right Now, Does it mean
that you have to cut them off and you can
no longer be friends? Absolutely not. All that means is
(24:43):
sometimes you need to take a break from that person, right,
Because we are trying and we are doing our best
to change our mindset to be uplifting and positive. Right.
But when we have people around us, whether it be
family or friends or even co workers, and all they
(25:08):
you know, do is like hom drum e or you know,
oh while their life kind of sucks. Oh so and
so did this right, there's no there's no light for them. Right.
We can show them and we can help them, right,
(25:29):
But if they don't want to help themselves, that's when
you really just step back and go Okay, but at
this time, I need a break from you, right, you
get up and you just leave and or you know,
I can't talk this, talk about this. I need to
(25:51):
feel a little more positive, because I'm going to tell
you as soon as you start changing this mindset, it's
really tough to be around people that are very hum
drum and want like it because it sucks the energy
right out of you. Right, And because you're trying to
(26:14):
help them and you want them to succeed and you
want them to feel happy and you want them to
know that they're loved. Right, But it doesn't matter what
you do, It's still doesn't matter. It still is like, right,
life fucking sucks and unfortunately you can't help people that
(26:40):
don't want to be helped, right, And in those instances,
you know, you start taking breaks, right, you start aligning
yourself with more like the people that are uplifting for you,
and you uplift them. And honestly, those people end up
(27:01):
just falling away. Right now, if they're family, it's a
little bit tougher, right, we can also have conversations with them,
right And sometimes people go, well, you're just being selfish
because you don't want to listen to what I'm going through,
(27:22):
et cetera, et cetera. Well, actually, no, I'm not being selfish.
These are a boundary of mine. And you know, I
would like you to be more positive and uplifting and
I'm trying to show you that way right now. Does
(27:46):
it mean that we ignore all the bad shit and
all the stuff that is auchy? And now it doesn't.
But we also look at it with different lenses, right
We can look at it and go, okay, well, how
much of a big deal is this? Was it? You know?
(28:08):
Is it really as bad as I think it was?
Or do we go you know, actually it's not that bad.
I I actually know how I can fix it or
I can adjust to it, do you know what I mean?
(28:29):
So it's not necessarily having to just sit and wallow
and wallow in your stuff. Right, It's it's stepping back,
having a look at the situation and going how dramatic
do I need to be about this? Is this something
(28:49):
that I should be one thousand percent dramatic about? Right? Yeah,
you could be dramatic about it, like everyone has their
moments and you go, ah, right, and you can figure
it out. But then take a deep breath and go
stand back and go, Okay, is this something that's really terrible?
(29:11):
Nine times out of ten, I'm going to tell you
it really isn't, And it's it's something that can be
easily fixed or adjust it. Right. Sometimes it's like do
I die on this mountain? Am I dying on this
mountain with this person? Because I just have to be
(29:36):
fucking right? Right? Or is it? You know, yeah, I'm
actually right? But is it worth it? Is it worth
burning things to the ground for that? Right? Most times
it's not. But it's sometimes it's not even about you know,
(30:00):
making sure you like people know that you are right.
Sometimes it's about saying your piece and if even if
they're still not in agreement or can't let it go,
sometimes you just you stop talking and you just back
(30:21):
away and you go, okay, that's okay. I said what
I needed to say. Do I need to absolutely say that? No,
you're I'm right and you're wrong? Like, why can't you
see this? Right? Like it's not necessary? Right? And we
(30:45):
when we take that stance of okay, here's my piece,
I've said it, and then you you back away from it,
people tend to look at you and go, okay, wow, wow, right,
Like I can't believe you would just walk away and
be okay with that. And I'm going to tell you
(31:08):
whoever you were arguing with later is probably gonna come
back and say I'm sorry. You know, like, I don't
know why I had to argue with you, right, Sometimes
I just don't want you to be right. Right. But
if we ourselves don't have to have the last say, right,
(31:32):
if we are okay with saying our piece and walking
our way, even if the other persons still talking, it
doesn't matter, right, It really doesn't matter because you said
what you needed to say and it should be good. Anyways,
it's that time again. It is time to go to
a break. You're watching Journey with Joan Only on The
(31:56):
Bold Brave TV we'll be right back after these messages.
Speaker 1 (32:03):
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But it's the subconscious beliefs that do most of the creating.
Belief shifter and life coach Charaz can help you identify
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Speaker 3 (33:05):
Are you struggling to care for elderly parents or a spouse?
Do you wonder if being a caregiver is making you sick?
Are you worried about taking time off work to care
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(33:25):
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Speaker 2 (34:06):
And we're back. You're listening to and watching Journey with
Joan and I'm Joan Wide, I'm your host. Thank you
all right? So another thing about the mindset, it's really
it comes down to us. It comes back to us
(34:26):
what do we want? Right again? Do we want that
picket fence? Do we want but is it because we
want that picket fence because other people have said it
that we should have it or do we actually really
want it? Maybe we do, right, or maybe we want
a mountain getaway and we want to be somewhat of
(34:50):
a hermit living like in the middle of the mountain somewhere.
That's okay, that's okay too, right, there is no wrong,
you could The sky is the limit here right again.
The universe God, they want all of us to be abundant,
to be happy. Every one should be happy. Right. And
(35:15):
when we're aligned with that, things just start. Doors start
to open, right, And it's also doors open and in
a sense of spirit starts to give you clues, right
they it directs you in certain things and you go,
I don't know why this happened, but okay. And then
(35:39):
later again when you're within your body and we're present
and in the moment, you can go, aha, now I know. Right.
So a few weekends I was in Idaho, right, and
we were there for a gymnastics tournament or competition, I
(36:00):
should say, not tournament, and we went to Target because
we don't have Target here in Alberta anymore. It's closed.
So we went to my youngest daughter. She's into YouTube
and she likes all these you know, the American way
and so she's like, let's go to Target. Let's check
(36:22):
it out. Okay, So we went and I was there
and I saw this jacket and I'm like, oh, I
really want this jacket, right like this puffy coat. And
I was like, I don't know why, but I always
really wanted one, and guess what happens to be in
my size? And it was only eighteen bucks. I'm perfect, kitchin,
(36:43):
thank you, hes all right here, I get it, you know.
And then on the way home, as weird as it was, right,
I didn't bring a jacket, so that was my only jacket,
the one that I actually bought. Our way home from
the States, we were driving through the mountains. We happened
(37:04):
to hit a big rock or something on the road.
Our tire blew out, so it was raining. It was
about five degrees. I don't know what that is in
a very night, but it chilli right and pouring and raining,
and we had to change the tire. I didn't have
(37:25):
a coat, but luckily, because I bought that coat, I
now had a coat and it was water resistant, so
I was dry and I was able to help no
problem change the tire. Right again, some people are like, oh,
that's just coincidence. But really was it coincidence? Right? It's
(37:50):
accepting the signs that spirit gives you and allowing it,
you know, allowing things to come to you so that
you're prepared in the future. Right now, I could have
been angry and I could have been whatever, like I
can't believe, right, could have blamed right, I wasn't driving.
I could have blamed my husband. Why did you hit that? Right?
(38:11):
Blah blah blah. But no, you know what deal with
the situation. Was it something that we needed to really
argue about. No, it wasn't because that doesn't change anything.
That doesn't change the situation at hand, right, And really
it it was like, wow, that was a coincidence, But
(38:32):
actually it wasn't. Right, it was guided by spirit because
I really it was what are the chances? There was
only one, There was only a small like one, and
it hit me perfect and it was exactly what I
would like, et cetera. Right, Again, I don't really believe
in coincidences. Things just play out. Spirit is, you know,
(38:59):
likes to ye, you know, help you out. So yeah,
that is that's an interesting concept for things, right, And
when we open our mindset to different possibilities and looking
at the good. Right, you could go through the drive
(39:20):
through and the person in front of you pays for
your coffee, and you're like, you could go sweet, right
and not even say thank you. Right. But when we
stay thank you to universe and we're grateful for everything,
things start to open up. Right. We need to also
acknowledge when things happen to us, right, so acknowledge the good.
(39:46):
Acknowledge even sometimes the crap. We need to acknowledge it.
We need to acknowledge and go, Okay, now where in
my mindset did this out or how did this come about? Great? Now,
you know there are certain things and that you know,
(40:11):
I'm not going to say that are our fault, right,
and I won't get into those, but you know it's
one of those things like was I in? You know?
What happened? Why was I there? Right? Sometimes you forget
your phone in the house and you're running late, but
(40:32):
you're like, do I get my phone? And you're going, no,
I better get my phone. So you go and you
get your phone and it just you know what pushes
you further two minutes or whatever, right, and then you're
driving and there just happens to be a collision. Do
you is that a coincidence? I'm going to tell you that,
(40:54):
like when I've seen that, it just happened maybe two
minutes five minutes before I drove by that. Right. Again,
sometimes being present and spirit gives us information, right, Like, no,
you actually need to go in and go grab your phone, right,
(41:16):
Like I want you to grab it, even though you
know you're like, oh, but I'm like kinda in a hurry.
I don't have time for this, but you know what,
take that extra time. It's okay. Again, that's on I'm
in a hurry and I don't know why, right, Like
all we have to do is live and die in
(41:37):
this lifetime. Right. But really, I'm gonna tell you, we
be kind and genuine to others and it will come
back to you tenfold. Right. So that kind of goes
into my next topic, like for next weekend, we're gonna
touch on it a little bit today, Like karma. Right,
(41:58):
everyone seems to think, okay, well karma if they if
you do something bad, well that's on them or whatever whatever, right,
Or if someone does something to us, we're like, well,
Karma's a bitch, baby, you know, figure it out. But again,
remember in the previous podcast. When you point right, you've
(42:20):
got three fingers pointing back at you. So when you
throw the shade of oh, well, you know, karma's a bitch,
you actually throwing ill will towards someone else, if that
makes sense, right, And so when we go okay, we
(42:42):
have to switch the mindset and go, you know what, Okay,
I don't know why they did that or what I
did to provoke that. I guess that was part of
my karma, right, Like, we can't go and throw that
back to them and say, well, that's your kaharma, and
(43:04):
that's going to happen, because I'm going to tell you
when you do that, you're throwing it actually back to you.
That's a negative thing, like you're throwing like you wish
someone bad, like ill will, like something bad to happen
to them. Right, So no, stop and think and go okay,
(43:25):
you know I didn't enjoy that. I didn't love that.
We don't know what their karma was. It's not up
to us because we are in charge of ourselves, right,
we are in control of our own destiny. This is
our own journey. Like me, this is my journey and
(43:47):
this is my stuff. But when someone does something that
I or you perceive to be wronged towards ours. You know,
we just take a step back and honestly just walk away.
You don't wish it, will you? In my like, what
(44:09):
I do is I just bless them, right, Like, I
don't necessarily say it out loud, but in my heart,
I just go, Okay, I bless you. I bless you
with pure love and light, and I bless you with
pure fight stars energy, right, I just bless them, and
then or you could say also, I'm sorry, please forgive me.
(44:35):
I love you. That's Anon, no prayer, which and people
are like, but Joan, why would you tell someone that
you love them after they just did that to you?
And I'm like, but it's not. Again, it's not me
telling that person I love them, that I love you
(44:57):
comes towards me, right, right, it's the love that I
have for myself, right, and so that it can fall
away and there's no karma attached or anything. You're just going, Okay,
I'm sorry, I love you, Please forgive me. And again
(45:17):
it's I don't know what I did wrong, and it
doesn't matter, doesn't really matter, it doesn't, right, And I
say this in my in my mind, and I just go,
I bless you right, so and cuts you off. I
bless them right. Not not Karma's a bitch, Not all
this stuff, because I'm gonna tell you, all of that
(45:39):
stuff comes right. It just it's like a boomerang. It
comes right back, and when it comes back, it's it's tenfold.
It's not the same as what you threw out, right,
So karma. Karma is about our own bank. And there's
good karma. Right. So when we do volunteering, and when
(46:05):
we help someone on the street, or we help you know,
we open the door for someone, we buy the person
behind us at the drive through their coffee, right, little
things like that. Good karma could even be saying hello
to someone in the grocery store. Most times, we just
(46:28):
are so so busy again, busy for what nothing really
right that we forget to be human, We forget to
be genuine, we forget to be kind, right, we forget
that humanity. We are a social creature, right, And there
(46:53):
are people out there that are very lonely, right, like
our elderly. They feel lonely, and if you say hello
to them, sometimes they just want to tuck your ear off.
And that's okay, if you have five minutes, great, great Again.
It's about being genuine kind and loving towards yourself and
(47:19):
that creates a good karma for you. Now again, if
you're only doing this stuff for good karma, you get
the good karma, but it's not necessarily going to be
as strong as if you were doing it out of
just the kindness of your heart. Right, it's not. Life
(47:42):
is not about tit for tat right, Like, we go
about our days and we need to just breathe and
we need to you know again, love each other, love thyself.
Love one another is really like be kind and gentle
(48:03):
to yourself. Anyways, it is that time again. You're watching
Journey with Joan on The Bold Brave TV, and we'll
be back after these messages.
Speaker 1 (48:20):
Author, radio show host and coach John M. Hawkins reveals
strategies to help gain perspective, build confidence, find clarity, achieve goals.
John M. Hawkins' new book Coached to Greatness Unlock Your
Full Potential with Limitless Growth, published by I Universe, Hawkins
(48:40):
reveals strategies to help readers accomplish more. He believes the
book can coach them to greatness. Hawkins says that the
best athletes get to the top of their sport with
the help of coaches, mentors, and others. He shares guidance
that helps readers reflect on what motivates though we discover
and assess their core backvalues, philosophies and competencies, find settings
(49:03):
that allow them to be the most productive, and track
their progress towards accomplishing goals. Listen to John Hawkins My
Strategy Saturday's one pm Eastern on the BBM Global Network
and tune in radio. What if there were a super
tiny device that could diagnose the brain and is smaller
(49:24):
than a single human hair? What if you could see
inside the brain to help an epilepsy patient during surgery
or to help the fight against Parkinson's disease. Doctor Patricia
Brodrick is proud to announce the Broaderick Probe, a biomedical
and electronic breakthrough imagine a probe to help with the
(49:46):
understanding and potential cure of brain related diseases. To learn more,
listen live to the Easy Sense Radio Show with host
Doctor Brodrick Wednesday's seven pm Eastern on the Bold Brain
me Via Network and tune in radio, and to help
support the Broaderick Foundation. Please go to easysense dot com
(50:07):
and learn how with your help we can fight these
horrific brain disorders. That's easysense dot com to learn more
and help support the Broaderick Foundation.
Speaker 2 (50:23):
And we're back. Thank you. This is Journey with Joan
and I'm John Wine. I'm your host. All right, we
were talking about karma, and you know, there are some
people that we go, you know, why are some people
that way? And I was talking over the break with
(50:44):
my engineer and he reminded me and I went, oh, okay, yes,
that's a great point. Some people are let's say itchy
because that's how they feel like they get seen and
hurd right, that's the only way they feel like anyone
(51:06):
listens to them, as if they're an ass, right, and
they have to feel they feel like they have to
stand their ground and be little other people. Right. So
in that instance, really it's about showing them a way
(51:27):
that you know, you still can be seen and heard
without having to be you know, belligerent or an ass right.
But they just need to be taught that and like
feel it. And again, you know, it's their way of
(51:50):
wanting to have attention, right, and their attention is really
just look at me. Do you see me? Do you
actually see me? Because I feel like no one there.
You know, I'm living my life and yes I'm rude
and I'm mean, but I don't feel like anyone sees me.
(52:13):
I feel like I'm invisible, right, and I want people
to just see me right, see me for me because
they might be the loneliest people on the planet because
they're just not understood, right, and sometimes it takes them
(52:36):
to open up their heart so that they can be
seen and be understood. Right. Most times people are closed off,
and we allow ourselves to be closed off, and we
close ourselves off so that we get You know, it's
easy to be grumpy, it really is, right, It's so
(52:59):
easy to be fucking miserable all the time. Does it
feel good? It doesn't, It really doesn't, But it happens. Right.
Sometimes we get in a funk, right, and we get
into depression, right, and we need help. That help happens
(53:22):
to be Western medicine, and that's okay, right, And in
those instances, that's when you have your community to help
lift you up and enjoy who they are, understand what
they're going through, right, help them flip that switch. So
(53:42):
that they can see that, you know what they are left.
People want them to be alive. They want them to
be on this earth, not six feet under. They want
you know, life would be different if you weren't here, right, Like,
some people need people to tell them that because when
(54:05):
life just gets going, people get busy. Friends, if they
have families, then you know the single ones that don't
have families. Sometimes life goes on and it's hard to
necessarily notice and see, right, But in our community, we
(54:29):
need to see and we need to look at our
friends and we go, okay, well, hey, I haven't seen
you in a long time. Or pick up the phone, right,
not just text because it's so easy to text. But
you can't understand. You can't feel the empathy from other
people when it's just through the device, through the text. Right.
(54:52):
Sometimes we physically, Sometimes someone just needs a hug. Right again,
ask if you don't know that person, if you can
give them a hug. But again, you know, when you
when you are happy and you enlighten yourself right now,
(55:13):
I'm not talking you know like trolls poppy happy, like
dancing around, bouncing up and down, right, like someone might
go stop being so like crazy daisy, and you're just
way too happy for me. Right. Happy doesn't mean you
(55:33):
have to be bouncing around like and you know, blowing
rainbows out of your ass like that's That's not what
I'm talking about. The happiness is sometimes even just contentment, right,
enjoying where you are in like today, right, not necessarily
(55:55):
you know, yearning for something else, but being here today.
What if you do yearn for something else? Right, keep
your eye on that prize, right, just know that you
are worthy of getting that. Right, Start writing to yourself, Yeah,
(56:16):
these are why I'm good at this? Right, This is
this and believe it and own it and love it
and enjoy you right, because this is your life. This
is the only life in this lifetime that you get
to enjoy. So why not make the full take full
(56:41):
advantage of it, and go for it. Right. What do
you have to lose? We don't have anything to lose,
is what I'm trying to say is, just enjoy your
life again, right, take care of you, take care you
know of your commune unity again and just go for it.
(57:04):
Go for what you want again. The universe is going
to give you whatever whatever you want. Right, Just know
that you are worthy of all these things and more life. Actually,
it just it's doled out to you. You can manifest
anything that you desire as long as you feel like
(57:28):
you actually deserve it. Right. Like again, it goes back
to like mister wonderful Kevin o'larry, Right, you don't love
your job, you're you're screwed. It's the same thing. If
you don't love what you want and what you want
to be, you're screwed. You really need to love yourself.
(57:52):
When we love ourselves, we open up the door to
infinite possibilities to just come our way. Right. When we
see the good and the positivity and other things and
different situations, the stress of it kind of melts away.
(58:17):
Now I'm not saying that no one has any stresses,
because that's not true. There is stress, it's how we
manage it, right, And the managing of our stress allows us,
you know, whether or not to be completely wired or
anything about that stress. But if we have the positivity
(58:40):
or a different outlook and go, you know what, that's
just a stepping stone to where I need to go.
And that's okay. Right. Was that a little bit stressful? Yeah, sure,
absolutely it was. But does it actually hurt our bodies. No,
because the stress is there. We felt the pang and
(59:01):
then we let it go. But we're not storing it.
We're not storing it and allow and then adding more
on top of it. Right because stress, stress is stress
really ages us and it really just does not feel
good for the soul. Right. Anyways, I'm gonna leave you
(59:25):
leave us with that because we are out of time
for this week. Thank you for watching again, We're out
of time. You're watching Joan Widen on Journey with Joan
only on the Bold Brave TV. Thank you and I'll
see you next week.
Speaker 1 (59:45):
This has been Journey with Joan with your host Joan Widen.
Tune in each week and start creating the life you deserve.
Here Fridays at nine pm Eastern on the Bold Brave
TV network
Welcome to Journey with Joan, a podcast hosted by Joan Widen,
a medium, reiki master, and mind body spirit coach. Join
Joan on the transformative journey as she empowers listeners to
embrace their future, let go of the past, and create
a fulfilling life. Are you ready to embark on your
(00:27):
own journey of self discovery? Please welcome the host of
Journey with Joan, Joan.
Speaker 2 (00:33):
Widen, Welcome. Thank you for joining me tonight. I'm have
being grateful to be here with you. Tonight. We're going
to talk about the mindset, having a mindset to get
(00:55):
our dreams and desires to attain the goals that we
want in our life. Now, most people when I say that,
they're just like, so, you're talking about this hippie stuff,
you know, peace and love and positivity, yay positivity all
(01:15):
the time. And a lot of people, such as Caroline
from North Dakota, she had asked me, how is that possible?
You can't be rainbows in sunshines all the time. How
can you make that work in an everyday life? Okay,
so I'm going to tell you you're right, It isn't possible
(01:40):
all the time. But most of the time. It's about
looking at the perspective, looking at how you react at things,
how we view things that come to us when people
say things to us, How do we internalize that for
our selves. Do we feel like people are always attacking us?
(02:04):
Do we feel like I can never get ahead? Or
do I feel like I'm a loser, or do I
feel you know, all these different things. So, yes, positivity,
but it's also part of within us, right, So this
mind of ours always is you know, peace, love, and war.
(02:29):
It came to me and I'm like, that's an interesting concept.
But it is because we when we have our downtime
and we're like, huh, this is nice, it's peaceful, it's relaxing.
Then we start to love ourselves and then we go
throughout our day and our day goes boom, right, like
keeps going, and then the war starts happening. Right, It's like,
(02:53):
I can't believe you did this with this. I can't
believe re reacted with this. I can't believe you allowed
so and so to do this to you, or you know,
instead of allowing them to do it to us, we go, wow,
they're right, I'm horrible at what I do or you know,
(03:15):
you start to believe in what other peoples have spewed
onto you. Right. So, when we decide that we need
to change things in our lives so we can create
and allow change to happen, we have to look within ourselves.
(03:39):
So again this is somewhat of an extension of last week, right,
And so it's the mindset, the mindset of changing how
we feel and how we can react to other people. Right. So,
for example, if we get bad news, we can decide
(04:03):
to go okay, and we can understand it and we
can feel it. And I'm not saying you're not allowed
to have emotions. Everyone has emotions, and you know what,
we need to honor those and we need to sit
with them, and we need to feel present within our
(04:24):
emotions and how we feel, because that's how we can
move on in our lives. That's how we move forward. Right.
It's when we have these emotions and it's like, you
know what, adults don't cry, or boys don't cry, or
you know, big girls don't cry. All these don't show
(04:46):
emotional crap. You know, we end up internalizing it, shoving
it down, and eventually we rupt, right, and life gets
super tough, It gets hard and we and then everything
(05:08):
is like a volcano. It just erupts and it just
goes right, And how how do we manage that? I'm
going to tell you it's gonna be way more difficult
to get through that if we let it faster and
we allow it to sit there in stew and right
(05:30):
versus if we sat with the emotion to begin with,
and then we allowed it and we're like, okay, all right,
we can process it. We can see how did I
react with it? Does it hurt? Yeah? Is that okay? Yes?
Can I have emotions about it? Absolutely? You can do
whatever you want. There is no wrong here, right, It's
(05:54):
really about how you interact or you re act within
yourselves and outwards towards others. Okay, what was it? So?
I came across a post from Kevin Kevin O'Leary. He
(06:17):
came up on my LinkedIn and it was perfect because I, well,
I was going to talk about mindset and his post
was if you don't love your job, you're screwed again.
So he I don't know if he's spiritual or not,
but from the business point of view, you look at that,
(06:40):
and he also says, hey, if you don't love what
you do or even enjoy it, You're screwed, yeah, because
you know what your body, your body is going to
react to that, and it won't really matter what we
try and do. Right. We can appease everyone, we could
do whatever, but at the end of the day we
(07:01):
come home and we have to sit and go okay,
you know, and people start internalizing it, and then it
goes My life is passing me by. I really don't
love my job, but you know what, it's comfortable. I'm
gonna stay with it because why I'm comfortable. It's a
(07:22):
decent paycheck, it has benefits, it is stable, and I
feel like I get a decent amount, and it's a
Monday to Friday, you name it. Right. We come up
with all the different excuses, right, but in our heart
(07:45):
of hearts, we know that that's not a right fit
and we would sometimes rather just do and feel miserable
and tell people that we're miserable then do something about it, right, right,
(08:07):
So then that job just becomes it starts feeling even
more daunting it. You know, you get up and you're like, oh,
I actually have to go back to work. I don't
really feel like going back to work today. You know,
maybe I should call them sick, do you know what
I mean? And then all these things, our work ethic
and our job performance starts to lag and starts to
(08:33):
diminish because we just don't have that gumption. But some
people like to coast. And that's okay too. What I'm
gonna tell you though, if you like to coast, it's
you're really just gonna coast. Right. You stay stagnant and
you stay still, and that's where you stay. Right. But
(08:53):
if you really want to grow and improve your life,
you really need to look within your self, right. And
so when you look within yourself, you kind of go,
what do I really want? Right? And okay, well is
this young girl full of shit? Right? Like she's saying, Okay, well,
(09:13):
I got to figure out some sort of positivity be
happy rah rah? Right, how does that work? Actually? You know,
it's not just about having to find the positivity, right,
It's about knowing you and understanding you as a person.
(09:35):
Right again, do you know what you really want to be? Right?
Most people, even in adulthood in their fifties, they're like,
I still don't know what you know? What I mean?
That's okay? And I feel like me pros. All right,
(10:01):
let me see, all right, so back at it, so focus,
all right? When we don't know what we want, that's okay. Again,
that gives us creative and outlet to figure out and
(10:24):
go what can we What do I really want? Do
I really want all this stuff? Do I really want this?
Do I want this? Right? And then it is about patience, right,
we need to be patient with ourselves because in order
for us to change our mindset, right, it takes at
(10:46):
least twenty one days to form a habit. Now for
all those fact chectors for when that wants to look,
I looked it up in the average, which it sayds
on Google to make to form a habit is around
sixty six days. Okay, So does that mean we have
(11:11):
to get angry with ourselves and tell ourselves like, hey,
I suck at this, I can't do this, this isn't right. No,
it's again, it's patience. It's showing yourself grace, loving yourself
enough to know that you know, things don't change overnight. Right.
(11:35):
If we like my children, my one of my daughters,
she used to suck her thumb, right, and that was
a super hard a habit to break, right, and it
just took reminding, hey, you don't you don't need to
soothe yourself with your thumb right? And were we angry
(11:59):
with her every time she did it? No? Right? And
it just slowly left right? And again, the more you
don't point out what's wrong in your life, it allows
us to be more gentle with ourselves, right, because every
(12:19):
time it's like you, you do something and you're like, oh,
I got angry with that. I can't believe it, and
you know, we keep at ourselves. It just makes us
feel angry and the anger starts the fester. And again
it's just like, I can't believe I did that right,
And the reels keep happening, and we keep seeing it
(12:42):
and envisioning it, and then we get even more angry
with ourselves. But you know, so in those cases it's
really time to just go stop, okay, go hey, right, yes,
how did I look at that? How did that go wrong?
(13:03):
It doesn't matter, it happened, it's okay, right, I'm not perfect.
You know, there are days where you know, it gets
really dicey and crazy and full of craziness. I have
three children, and so you know when everyone wants to
(13:27):
do something and you know the dogs are working, the
children want like attention. It just gets crazy and can
I lose my shit? I do? Yeah, absolutely right. But
then you know when you think about it and you
look back and you go, okay, well, you know, I'm
sorry I shouldn't have done that, But you know, I
(13:51):
also don't sit there and beat myself up about it
when I go to bed, right, And a lot of
people tend to do things like that. When we are
ready to you know, go to bed, we start winding
down and things just kind of okay. Right when we
(14:13):
wind down again, we start going through our day and
trying to figure out how we're gonna you know, go
to sleep, and how you know, organize our day and
then allow it for the next day to come in.
We're going to stop right there because we are going
to go on a break. We'll be back after these messages.
Speaker 1 (14:38):
What if there were a super tiny device that could
diagnose the brain and is smaller than a single human hair.
What if you could see inside the brain to help
an epilepsy patient during surgery or to help the fight
against Parkinson's disease. Doctor Patricia Broderick is proud to announce
the Broaderick prove a biomedical and electronic breakthrough imagine a
(15:04):
probe to help with the understanding and potential cure of
brain related diseases. To learn more, listen live to the
Easy Sense Radio Show with host Doctor Brodrick Wednesday's seven
pm Eastern on the Bold Brave Media Network and tune
in radio. And to help support the Broaderick Foundation, please
(15:24):
go to easysense dot com and learn how with your
help we can fight these horrific brain disorders. That's easysense
dot com. To learn more and help support the Broaderick Foundation. Author,
radio show host and coach John M. Hawkins reveals strategies
(15:46):
to help gain perspective, build confidence, find clarity, achieve goals.
John M. Hawkins new book Coached to Greatness Unlock Your
Full Potential with Limitless Growth, published by I Universe, Hawkins
reveal strategies to help readers accomplish more. He believes the
book can coach them to greatness. Hawkins says that the
(16:08):
best athletes get to the top of their sport with
the help of coaches, mentors, and others. He shares guidance
that helps readers reflect on what motivates them. We discover
and assess their core values, philosophies, and competencies, find settings
that allow them to be the most productive, and track
their progress towards accomplishing goals. Listen to John Hawkins My
(16:31):
Strategy Saturdays one pm Eastern on the BBM Global Network
and tune in radio.
Speaker 2 (16:47):
Welcome back, and you are watching Journey with John and
I'm John Warnon. Thank you for listening. All right, So
we were talking about winding down and and being again
more you know, hard on ourselves, right, things like that. Again,
(17:08):
it takes patience, and all it does is take a
moment when you're in that in a rage or feeling
very frustrated or flustered, to take a deep breath. And
sometimes if you have to remove yourself from the situation, right,
(17:29):
go to the washroom. No one's ever gonna say anything
if you need to go to the washroom, Just remove
yourself from the situation. Then like collect yourself and then
go right. The only person that's judging you is you. Right,
people will just go okay, like it's not a big deal.
(17:53):
And again, the biggest thing people have told me is
it's none of your business. But other people think of you. Right,
So your journey is your journey and the people within
your group and your like your family and your close
knit friends, well, are they part of your journey? Absolutely right?
(18:16):
We need to surround ourselves with the people that support
us and will love us no matter what. Right, So
they support us, meaning you know, if they're having a
shitty day and you can only give let's say sixty
percent into your friendship at the moment, you know, your
(18:39):
friends should be able to give you that extra forty
do you know what I mean? To bring you up,
to boost you up so that you know everyone can thrive,
and then you can start to ticket that breath, that
breath of air, just to breathe, right, and even with
(18:59):
your spouse, right, same thing. Sometimes the day is just chaotic, right,
and just like today, it's interesting, right. I had to
deal with a lot of driving today and I just
felt like it was rush rush, rush here, going here,
(19:21):
going there, and I had to get ready to be
able to talk to you guys, And in my mind,
I'm going, oh my goodness, I can I do this? Right?
And one thought was should I or should I? Just
maybe I should just not do this? And you guys
(19:43):
can listen to a rerun, but you know, that's just
but that wasn't that's not an option, right, Well, it
is an option, don't get me wrong. However, when I
took a step back, and spirit likes to have fun
with me, and it kind of bugs like, likes to
(20:04):
joke and you know, bug me a little bit. My
radio when I was driving driving home from driving my
youngest to gymnastics practice training, the song from I Believe Alabama,
I'm in a hurry, And if you really listen to
(20:26):
those lyrics, it says I'm in a hurry and I
don't know why. All I have to do is live
and die. Right, So if we're really looking at that,
I kind of went, yeah, you're kind of right. Why
am I in such a hurry? Right? I know I
have pretty much everything set out laid out right, But
(20:51):
then I went, oh, yes, of course, because we are
talking about changing the mindset, right, And again here it is, I'm,
you know, just like you guys. It's still you know,
I'm learning every day and it's a continual growth up
until I die, right, And so it's easy it would
(21:15):
be easy for me to go no, you know, I
shouldn't have been able to do this, or it was
so and so's felt or it was blah blah blah
blah blah blah, right, or the kids, I don't maybe
they shouldn't go do their things, or you know, maybe
they should stay home from school because you know then
it would be easier for me. But really, when you
(21:36):
take a step back and take a deep breath and go, okay,
do I really need to do my ritual? Do I
really need have to do all these different things? No?
I don't. Right, I've had the topic. I was able
(21:57):
to do all those things, and you know, I could
have gotten really frustrated and really angry. And again that's
how life happens, right, So take a step back, take
a breath and go, okay, is it really that big
of a deal? Right? Okay, So positivity right when say,
(22:27):
for today, right, like it was just chaotic and crazy.
I felt like I was panicky, And you know, we
all get those ways where we can be panicked and
we can feel that manic, right like, oh my goodness, right,
feel like our head is like chopped off and we
don't know how to get going right. We just need
(22:54):
again we go, okay, what happened today? What was a
good thing about today? Right? One thing right. I you
know everyone was happy when they woke up today. The
sun is shining today, do you know what I mean?
It only takes one thing to help change that mindset
(23:17):
and does it again? It doesn't have to be Kumbaya
all the time. Right. You even curse it yourself and
go fuck John't like, get out of your head. That's okay,
no big deal? Right? Is it really that big deal? No? Right?
And so then you just oh, okay, just breathe, It's okay.
(23:41):
Right again, It takes an average of sixty six days
to change your mindset into getting into the groove into
allowing things to manifest to you know, attract, so you
(24:02):
can attract things to you, and that's okay. So I
also talked about aligning yourself with the people with people
around you that will support you and uplift you. Right, So,
(24:22):
when you start to change your mindset, you will notice
who doesn't fit in that right Now, Does it mean
that you have to cut them off and you can
no longer be friends? Absolutely not. All that means is
(24:43):
sometimes you need to take a break from that person, right,
Because we are trying and we are doing our best
to change our mindset to be uplifting and positive. Right.
But when we have people around us, whether it be
family or friends or even co workers, and all they
(25:08):
you know, do is like hom drum e or you know,
oh while their life kind of sucks. Oh so and
so did this right, there's no there's no light for them. Right.
We can show them and we can help them, right,
(25:29):
But if they don't want to help themselves, that's when
you really just step back and go Okay, but at
this time, I need a break from you, right, you
get up and you just leave and or you know,
I can't talk this, talk about this. I need to
(25:51):
feel a little more positive, because I'm going to tell
you as soon as you start changing this mindset, it's
really tough to be around people that are very hum
drum and want like it because it sucks the energy
right out of you. Right, And because you're trying to
(26:14):
help them and you want them to succeed and you
want them to feel happy and you want them to
know that they're loved. Right, But it doesn't matter what
you do, It's still doesn't matter. It still is like, right,
life fucking sucks and unfortunately you can't help people that
(26:40):
don't want to be helped, right, And in those instances,
you know, you start taking breaks, right, you start aligning
yourself with more like the people that are uplifting for you,
and you uplift them. And honestly, those people end up
(27:01):
just falling away. Right now, if they're family, it's a
little bit tougher, right, we can also have conversations with them,
right And sometimes people go, well, you're just being selfish
because you don't want to listen to what I'm going through,
(27:22):
et cetera, et cetera. Well, actually, no, I'm not being selfish.
These are a boundary of mine. And you know, I
would like you to be more positive and uplifting and
I'm trying to show you that way right now. Does
(27:46):
it mean that we ignore all the bad shit and
all the stuff that is auchy? And now it doesn't.
But we also look at it with different lenses, right
We can look at it and go, okay, well, how
much of a big deal is this? Was it? You know?
(28:08):
Is it really as bad as I think it was?
Or do we go you know, actually it's not that bad.
I I actually know how I can fix it or
I can adjust to it, do you know what I mean?
(28:29):
So it's not necessarily having to just sit and wallow
and wallow in your stuff. Right, It's it's stepping back,
having a look at the situation and going how dramatic
do I need to be about this? Is this something
(28:49):
that I should be one thousand percent dramatic about? Right? Yeah,
you could be dramatic about it, like everyone has their
moments and you go, ah, right, and you can figure
it out. But then take a deep breath and go
stand back and go, Okay, is this something that's really terrible?
(29:11):
Nine times out of ten, I'm going to tell you
it really isn't, And it's it's something that can be
easily fixed or adjust it. Right. Sometimes it's like do
I die on this mountain? Am I dying on this
mountain with this person? Because I just have to be
(29:36):
fucking right? Right? Or is it? You know, yeah, I'm
actually right? But is it worth it? Is it worth
burning things to the ground for that? Right? Most times
it's not. But it's sometimes it's not even about you know,
(30:00):
making sure you like people know that you are right.
Sometimes it's about saying your piece and if even if
they're still not in agreement or can't let it go,
sometimes you just you stop talking and you just back
(30:21):
away and you go, okay, that's okay. I said what
I needed to say. Do I need to absolutely say that? No,
you're I'm right and you're wrong? Like, why can't you
see this? Right? Like it's not necessary? Right? And we
(30:45):
when we take that stance of okay, here's my piece,
I've said it, and then you you back away from it,
people tend to look at you and go, okay, wow, wow, right,
Like I can't believe you would just walk away and
be okay with that. And I'm going to tell you
(31:08):
whoever you were arguing with later is probably gonna come
back and say I'm sorry. You know, like, I don't
know why I had to argue with you, right, Sometimes
I just don't want you to be right. Right. But
if we ourselves don't have to have the last say, right,
(31:32):
if we are okay with saying our piece and walking
our way, even if the other persons still talking, it
doesn't matter, right, It really doesn't matter because you said
what you needed to say and it should be good. Anyways,
it's that time again. It is time to go to
a break. You're watching Journey with Joan Only on The
(31:56):
Bold Brave TV we'll be right back after these messages.
Speaker 1 (32:03):
Did you know that your beliefs create your entire reality?
But it's the subconscious beliefs that do most of the creating.
Belief shifter and life coach Charaz can help you identify
those limiting beliefs and eliminate them, often in a single session, Like.
Speaker 3 (32:19):
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(32:58):
be aware, be magical.
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(33:25):
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Speaker 2 (34:06):
And we're back. You're listening to and watching Journey with
Joan and I'm Joan Wide, I'm your host. Thank you
all right? So another thing about the mindset, it's really
it comes down to us. It comes back to us
(34:26):
what do we want? Right again? Do we want that
picket fence? Do we want but is it because we
want that picket fence because other people have said it
that we should have it or do we actually really
want it? Maybe we do, right, or maybe we want
a mountain getaway and we want to be somewhat of
(34:50):
a hermit living like in the middle of the mountain somewhere.
That's okay, that's okay too, right, there is no wrong,
you could The sky is the limit here right again.
The universe God, they want all of us to be abundant,
to be happy. Every one should be happy. Right. And
(35:15):
when we're aligned with that, things just start. Doors start
to open, right, And it's also doors open and in
a sense of spirit starts to give you clues, right
they it directs you in certain things and you go,
I don't know why this happened, but okay. And then
(35:39):
later again when you're within your body and we're present
and in the moment, you can go, aha, now I know. Right.
So a few weekends I was in Idaho, right, and
we were there for a gymnastics tournament or competition, I
(36:00):
should say, not tournament, and we went to Target because
we don't have Target here in Alberta anymore. It's closed.
So we went to my youngest daughter. She's into YouTube
and she likes all these you know, the American way
and so she's like, let's go to Target. Let's check
(36:22):
it out. Okay, So we went and I was there
and I saw this jacket and I'm like, oh, I
really want this jacket, right like this puffy coat. And
I was like, I don't know why, but I always
really wanted one, and guess what happens to be in
my size? And it was only eighteen bucks. I'm perfect, kitchin,
(36:43):
thank you, hes all right here, I get it, you know.
And then on the way home, as weird as it was, right,
I didn't bring a jacket, so that was my only jacket,
the one that I actually bought. Our way home from
the States, we were driving through the mountains. We happened
(37:04):
to hit a big rock or something on the road.
Our tire blew out, so it was raining. It was
about five degrees. I don't know what that is in
a very night, but it chilli right and pouring and raining,
and we had to change the tire. I didn't have
(37:25):
a coat, but luckily, because I bought that coat, I
now had a coat and it was water resistant, so
I was dry and I was able to help no
problem change the tire. Right again, some people are like, oh,
that's just coincidence. But really was it coincidence? Right? It's
(37:50):
accepting the signs that spirit gives you and allowing it,
you know, allowing things to come to you so that
you're prepared in the future. Right now, I could have
been angry and I could have been whatever, like I
can't believe, right, could have blamed right, I wasn't driving.
I could have blamed my husband. Why did you hit that? Right?
(38:11):
Blah blah blah. But no, you know what deal with
the situation. Was it something that we needed to really
argue about. No, it wasn't because that doesn't change anything.
That doesn't change the situation at hand, right, And really
it it was like, wow, that was a coincidence, But
(38:32):
actually it wasn't. Right, it was guided by spirit because
I really it was what are the chances? There was
only one, There was only a small like one, and
it hit me perfect and it was exactly what I
would like, et cetera. Right, Again, I don't really believe
in coincidences. Things just play out. Spirit is, you know,
(38:59):
likes to ye, you know, help you out. So yeah,
that is that's an interesting concept for things, right, And
when we open our mindset to different possibilities and looking
at the good. Right, you could go through the drive
(39:20):
through and the person in front of you pays for
your coffee, and you're like, you could go sweet, right
and not even say thank you. Right. But when we
stay thank you to universe and we're grateful for everything,
things start to open up. Right. We need to also
acknowledge when things happen to us, right, so acknowledge the good.
(39:46):
Acknowledge even sometimes the crap. We need to acknowledge it.
We need to acknowledge and go, Okay, now where in
my mindset did this out or how did this come about? Great? Now,
you know there are certain things and that you know,
(40:11):
I'm not going to say that are our fault, right,
and I won't get into those, but you know it's
one of those things like was I in? You know?
What happened? Why was I there? Right? Sometimes you forget
your phone in the house and you're running late, but
(40:32):
you're like, do I get my phone? And you're going, no,
I better get my phone. So you go and you
get your phone and it just you know what pushes
you further two minutes or whatever, right, and then you're
driving and there just happens to be a collision. Do
you is that a coincidence? I'm going to tell you that,
(40:54):
like when I've seen that, it just happened maybe two
minutes five minutes before I drove by that. Right. Again,
sometimes being present and spirit gives us information, right, Like, no,
you actually need to go in and go grab your phone, right,
(41:16):
Like I want you to grab it, even though you
know you're like, oh, but I'm like kinda in a hurry.
I don't have time for this, but you know what,
take that extra time. It's okay. Again, that's on I'm
in a hurry and I don't know why, right, Like
all we have to do is live and die in
(41:37):
this lifetime. Right. But really, I'm gonna tell you, we
be kind and genuine to others and it will come
back to you tenfold. Right. So that kind of goes
into my next topic, like for next weekend, we're gonna
touch on it a little bit today, Like karma. Right,
(41:58):
everyone seems to think, okay, well karma if they if
you do something bad, well that's on them or whatever whatever, right,
Or if someone does something to us, we're like, well,
Karma's a bitch, baby, you know, figure it out. But again,
remember in the previous podcast. When you point right, you've
(42:20):
got three fingers pointing back at you. So when you
throw the shade of oh, well, you know, karma's a bitch,
you actually throwing ill will towards someone else, if that
makes sense, right, And so when we go okay, we
(42:42):
have to switch the mindset and go, you know what, Okay,
I don't know why they did that or what I
did to provoke that. I guess that was part of
my karma, right, Like, we can't go and throw that
back to them and say, well, that's your kaharma, and
(43:04):
that's going to happen, because I'm going to tell you
when you do that, you're throwing it actually back to you.
That's a negative thing, like you're throwing like you wish
someone bad, like ill will, like something bad to happen
to them. Right, So no, stop and think and go okay,
(43:25):
you know I didn't enjoy that. I didn't love that.
We don't know what their karma was. It's not up
to us because we are in charge of ourselves, right,
we are in control of our own destiny. This is
our own journey. Like me, this is my journey and
(43:47):
this is my stuff. But when someone does something that
I or you perceive to be wronged towards ours. You know,
we just take a step back and honestly just walk away.
You don't wish it, will you? In my like, what
(44:09):
I do is I just bless them, right, Like, I
don't necessarily say it out loud, but in my heart,
I just go, Okay, I bless you. I bless you
with pure love and light, and I bless you with
pure fight stars energy, right, I just bless them, and
then or you could say also, I'm sorry, please forgive me.
(44:35):
I love you. That's Anon, no prayer, which and people
are like, but Joan, why would you tell someone that
you love them after they just did that to you?
And I'm like, but it's not. Again, it's not me
telling that person I love them, that I love you
(44:57):
comes towards me, right, right, it's the love that I
have for myself, right, and so that it can fall
away and there's no karma attached or anything. You're just going, Okay,
I'm sorry, I love you, Please forgive me. And again
(45:17):
it's I don't know what I did wrong, and it
doesn't matter, doesn't really matter, it doesn't, right, And I
say this in my in my mind, and I just go,
I bless you right, so and cuts you off. I
bless them right. Not not Karma's a bitch, Not all
this stuff, because I'm gonna tell you, all of that
(45:39):
stuff comes right. It just it's like a boomerang. It
comes right back, and when it comes back, it's it's tenfold.
It's not the same as what you threw out, right,
So karma. Karma is about our own bank. And there's
good karma. Right. So when we do volunteering, and when
(46:05):
we help someone on the street, or we help you know,
we open the door for someone, we buy the person
behind us at the drive through their coffee, right, little
things like that. Good karma could even be saying hello
to someone in the grocery store. Most times, we just
(46:28):
are so so busy again, busy for what nothing really
right that we forget to be human, We forget to
be genuine, we forget to be kind, right, we forget
that humanity. We are a social creature, right, And there
(46:53):
are people out there that are very lonely, right, like
our elderly. They feel lonely, and if you say hello
to them, sometimes they just want to tuck your ear off.
And that's okay, if you have five minutes, great, great Again.
It's about being genuine kind and loving towards yourself and
(47:19):
that creates a good karma for you. Now again, if
you're only doing this stuff for good karma, you get
the good karma, but it's not necessarily going to be
as strong as if you were doing it out of
just the kindness of your heart. Right, it's not. Life
(47:42):
is not about tit for tat right, Like, we go
about our days and we need to just breathe and
we need to you know again, love each other, love thyself.
Love one another is really like be kind and gentle
(48:03):
to yourself. Anyways, it is that time again. You're watching
Journey with Joan on The Bold Brave TV, and we'll
be back after these messages.
Speaker 1 (48:20):
Author, radio show host and coach John M. Hawkins reveals
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Speaker 2 (50:23):
And we're back. Thank you. This is Journey with Joan
and I'm John Wine. I'm your host. All right, we
were talking about karma, and you know, there are some
people that we go, you know, why are some people
that way? And I was talking over the break with
(50:44):
my engineer and he reminded me and I went, oh, okay, yes,
that's a great point. Some people are let's say itchy
because that's how they feel like they get seen and
hurd right, that's the only way they feel like anyone
(51:06):
listens to them, as if they're an ass, right, and
they have to feel they feel like they have to
stand their ground and be little other people. Right. So
in that instance, really it's about showing them a way
(51:27):
that you know, you still can be seen and heard
without having to be you know, belligerent or an ass right.
But they just need to be taught that and like
feel it. And again, you know, it's their way of
(51:50):
wanting to have attention, right, and their attention is really
just look at me. Do you see me? Do you
actually see me? Because I feel like no one there.
You know, I'm living my life and yes I'm rude
and I'm mean, but I don't feel like anyone sees me.
(52:13):
I feel like I'm invisible, right, and I want people
to just see me right, see me for me because
they might be the loneliest people on the planet because
they're just not understood, right, and sometimes it takes them
(52:36):
to open up their heart so that they can be
seen and be understood. Right. Most times people are closed off,
and we allow ourselves to be closed off, and we
close ourselves off so that we get You know, it's
easy to be grumpy, it really is, right, It's so
(52:59):
easy to be fucking miserable all the time. Does it
feel good? It doesn't, It really doesn't, But it happens. Right.
Sometimes we get in a funk, right, and we get
into depression, right, and we need help. That help happens
(53:22):
to be Western medicine, and that's okay, right, And in
those instances, that's when you have your community to help
lift you up and enjoy who they are, understand what
they're going through, right, help them flip that switch. So
(53:42):
that they can see that, you know what they are left.
People want them to be alive. They want them to
be on this earth, not six feet under. They want
you know, life would be different if you weren't here, right, Like,
some people need people to tell them that because when
(54:05):
life just gets going, people get busy. Friends, if they
have families, then you know the single ones that don't
have families. Sometimes life goes on and it's hard to
necessarily notice and see, right, But in our community, we
(54:29):
need to see and we need to look at our
friends and we go, okay, well, hey, I haven't seen
you in a long time. Or pick up the phone, right,
not just text because it's so easy to text. But
you can't understand. You can't feel the empathy from other
people when it's just through the device, through the text. Right.
(54:52):
Sometimes we physically, Sometimes someone just needs a hug. Right again,
ask if you don't know that person, if you can
give them a hug. But again, you know, when you
when you are happy and you enlighten yourself right now,
(55:13):
I'm not talking you know like trolls poppy happy, like
dancing around, bouncing up and down, right, like someone might
go stop being so like crazy daisy, and you're just
way too happy for me. Right. Happy doesn't mean you
(55:33):
have to be bouncing around like and you know, blowing
rainbows out of your ass like that's That's not what
I'm talking about. The happiness is sometimes even just contentment, right,
enjoying where you are in like today, right, not necessarily
(55:55):
you know, yearning for something else, but being here today.
What if you do yearn for something else? Right, keep
your eye on that prize, right, just know that you
are worthy of getting that. Right, Start writing to yourself, Yeah,
(56:16):
these are why I'm good at this? Right, This is
this and believe it and own it and love it
and enjoy you right, because this is your life. This
is the only life in this lifetime that you get
to enjoy. So why not make the full take full
(56:41):
advantage of it, and go for it. Right. What do
you have to lose? We don't have anything to lose,
is what I'm trying to say is, just enjoy your
life again, right, take care of you, take care you
know of your commune unity again and just go for it.
(57:04):
Go for what you want again. The universe is going
to give you whatever whatever you want. Right, Just know
that you are worthy of all these things and more life. Actually,
it just it's doled out to you. You can manifest
anything that you desire as long as you feel like
(57:28):
you actually deserve it. Right. Like again, it goes back
to like mister wonderful Kevin o'larry, Right, you don't love
your job, you're you're screwed. It's the same thing. If
you don't love what you want and what you want
to be, you're screwed. You really need to love yourself.
(57:52):
When we love ourselves, we open up the door to
infinite possibilities to just come our way. Right. When we
see the good and the positivity and other things and
different situations, the stress of it kind of melts away.
(58:17):
Now I'm not saying that no one has any stresses,
because that's not true. There is stress, it's how we
manage it, right, And the managing of our stress allows us,
you know, whether or not to be completely wired or
anything about that stress. But if we have the positivity
(58:40):
or a different outlook and go, you know what, that's
just a stepping stone to where I need to go.
And that's okay. Right. Was that a little bit stressful? Yeah, sure,
absolutely it was. But does it actually hurt our bodies. No,
because the stress is there. We felt the pang and
(59:01):
then we let it go. But we're not storing it.
We're not storing it and allow and then adding more
on top of it. Right because stress, stress is stress
really ages us and it really just does not feel
good for the soul. Right. Anyways, I'm gonna leave you
(59:25):
leave us with that because we are out of time
for this week. Thank you for watching again, We're out
of time. You're watching Joan Widen on Journey with Joan
only on the Bold Brave TV. Thank you and I'll
see you next week.
Speaker 1 (59:45):
This has been Journey with Joan with your host Joan Widen.
Tune in each week and start creating the life you deserve.
Here Fridays at nine pm Eastern on the Bold Brave
TV network
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