August 13, 2025 • 13 mins
In life and business, we often face situations where we feel the urge to cut ties and move on. But is burning the bridge ever a good idea? Join us as we dive into the pros and cons of burning bridges and explore when it might be necessary to take drastic action. From toxic relationships to stagnant careers, we'll examine the scenarios where severing ties can be liberating, and when it's better to keep the bridges intact. Whether you're looking to make a fresh start or simply need guidance on navigating difficult relationships, this video is for you. So, is burning the bridge ever a good idea? Watch to find out!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Hey, friends, I'm Jonathan Smith and this is Jump In
with Jonathan, the podcast that makes you think, smile and
take action. Are you ready to jump in this show
with me? Let's go. Hey everyone, welcome back to Jump
In with Jonathan. I'm your host, Jonathan Smith. Today we're
(00:22):
going to be diving into a phrase we've all heard
and at some point in our lives, maybe even lived out.
It is the phrase called burning bridges. You know what
I'm talking about, walking away from a relationship, a friendship,
or even a job, and knowing once you walk away,
there's no turning back. Sometimes it's deliberate, sometimes it's accidental.
(00:48):
But here's the question. When is burning a bridge the
right move? And when does it make life harder down
the road. See, when we burn a bridge, it's a
fifty to fifty shot if we ever will get a
second chance or not. So I want to give you
number one what burning a bridge really means. Burning a
(01:08):
bridge is more than just leaving someone or something behind.
It's cutting off the possibility of going back. It can
happen in different situations. Quitting a job in frustration without notice.
I've done that once or twice, ending a friendship with
a final text or a big blow up or cussing
(01:31):
them out. That's sad because you've called this person a friend,
you've considered this person somewhat family, and now you've burnt
the bridge publicly calling out someone in a way that
makes reconciliation nearly impossible. The thing is, it's not always bad.
(01:53):
Sometimes the bridge you burn is the one that leads
you back to a place that's not healthy for you
you or healthy for your family. Other times, and this
is the hardest one, it's a bridge you wish you
had it burned. I've burnt several bridges in my life.
(02:14):
There have been times that when I've burnt a bridge,
it was good for me. It was good for my
mental health, it was good for my family, it was
good for my relationship. It was good for lots of
different reasons. Then there's been other times that I've burnt
bridges and I stepped back and I'm like, oh my god,
what did I just do? Why in the world did
(02:35):
I do that? Why would I have burnt of all
the bridges, why would I have burnt this bridge? So
when I begin to look at that, I want to
give you something today on when is it wise to
burn a bridge. There are moments when burning a bridge
has self preservation, toxic environments, a workplace that's unethical, a
(03:00):
friend who constantly manipulates, or a relationship that's abusive that
at that moment it's very wise to burn a bridge.
I've burnt bridges in several of these areas. Protecting your
values of keeping the connection means betraying who you are.
You should never do anything that goes against your beliefs
(03:24):
as a person, whether you're a Christian or a non Christian.
We all have beliefs, we all have morals, we all
have values that we hold true to, and you and
I should not burn. You and I should not be
put in a place that we have to choose our
beliefs and our values over a decision. At that moment,
(03:47):
it is time to burn a bridge and do what
is right. Breaking harmful cycles. If you've been in the
same unhealthy pattern for years, Sometimes burning a bridge is
locking in the back door behind you. It makes sure
you don't slip back into a situation that you have
fault hard to escape. Sometimes you need to pour a
(04:10):
lot of gas across that bridge before you burn it.
That way, you make sure there's no turning back. That
is when it's wise. If you're in an abusive relationship
and you leave that relationship and they're begging you to
come back, Sam, please come back. If you come back,
I won't hit you no more if you come back,
I won't yell at you no more. If you come back,
(04:31):
I'll quit being a narcissist if you if you'll come back,
I won't be a manipulator. Do not go back. If
you come back, I promise I won't cheat on you again.
Do not go back. Burn that bridge. When you're getting
(04:52):
ready to walk out of a job because you've not
had a raise in several years, because you feel underappreciated
because of all of that, and you tell them I'm
going to leave, and all of a sudden they have
the money to give you a raise, and all of
a sudden they want to give you awards, and all
of a sudden they want to give you plaques to
make you feel good. Burn that bridge. Burn it. Go
(05:15):
somewhere that you don't have to beg for a raise.
Go somewhere that you don't have to ask to be recognized.
Go somewhere that appreciates you. Go to people that care
for you burn that bridge when it comes to a
friend who lies, who cheats, who steals from you, who
will who will say, let me borrow a couple dollars
(05:35):
and never pay it back, or who will use their
situation to manipulate you into giving them money, into giving
them sympathy, into giving them things, and then all of
a sudden you look and they didn't need them burn
that bridge. See, well, you've told me to burn a bridge.
Can we ever mend a bridge? Absolutely we can, And
(05:59):
that's what I want to look at next on every
On the other hand, sorry about that. On the other hand,
not every conflict needs to end with a big fire.
Not every conflict means that I have to burn a bridge,
or that I'm going to burn a bridge. Misunderstandings can
(06:24):
be fixed with real conversation, more than sending a text,
more than sending an email, more than sending a voice recording,
but meeting that other party face to face, saying let's
resolve this now. Sometimes swallowing your pride is the only
(06:47):
thing stopping you from repairing things. I've talked to people before,
and I've told them, I said, you need to man up,
you need a woman up. You need to tell them
I'm sorry. I didn't do nothing wrong. It doesn't matter.
Be the better person, be the bigger person, be willing
to step up and say, look, I'm sorry, I'm sorry
that we're fighting, I'm sorry that we're arguing. I'm sorry
(07:09):
that we're bickering. And I do not want to burn
this bridge. In the professional world, keeping relationship intact can
open doors. Later on a few months ago, I was
in a store and I was having a rough day.
I needed something and I jumped down someone's throat in
(07:33):
a store. And when I left that store, I felt
terrible about what I had done. So a couple months ago,
I went back into that store and found that person
and I apologized to them. And you know, ever since then,
I've built a relationship with that person. Not the open doors,
(07:56):
but because it was the right thing to do. The
key is asking yourself, is the damage really permanent? Or
am I just angry right now? Sometimes when you're having
a bad day, Sometimes when you're angry, sometimes when you're cranky,
and you know that if you say the wrong thing,
it's going to burn a bridge, Just be quiet and
move on. Everybody has an opinion. Opinions are like buttholes.
(08:18):
One percent of them stink. Okay, we're not all going
to agree with them, but at the end of the day,
don't let your anger cause you to burn a bridge
that if you will, just bite your tongue, bite your lip,
something that can be mended. So how do I decide
if I'm going to burn a bridge or if I'm
(08:40):
going to mend a bridge? Number One? Ask yourself? Is
this emotional or intentional? Am I gonna let my emotions
get ahead of me and burn this bridge? Or am
I intentionally burning this bridge because it's the best thing
for me at my situation? Ask yourself? Could boundaries fix
(09:04):
this instead of destruction? There's no boundaries in an abusive relationship.
There are no boundaries when dealing with a narcissist. There
are no boundaries when dealing with a manipulator. There are
no boundaries when someone cheats on you. There are no
boundaries in none of those things, and those things cannot
be fixed. I don't care what people say. I don't
care who says what. I was on a podcast a
(09:26):
couple of weeks ago, sitting down with someone and I
said on it's a cheater, always a cheater. If somebody
will cheat on you now, they'll cheat on you later
and out of the road. The other person in that
conversation said, that's not necessarily true. I totally disagree, So
take it for what you want. Can boundaries fix this
instead of destruction? Will this choice still makes sense in
(09:52):
a year. If you're in doubt about any of these questions,
when you're asking yourself this, take a breath. Step back
before making the final decision, Step back and process the
whole situation. A lot of us want to be reactive.
(10:17):
A lot of us want to react instantly, and sometimes
the best reaction is no reaction at all. Well, what
happens if I burn a bridge? Or what happens if
I'm in the bridge? How can I move forward without regret?
I'm glad you asked if you've already burned a bridge
and it still feels right, don't carry guilt. Sometimes letting
(10:37):
go is necessary. There are people that I have locked
out of my life. There are people that I've blocked
out of my life. There are people that I have
moved on from that to this day. I can see
them out, I can look at them and I'm like,
I'm glad that bridge is burnt. If you've burned a
bridge in a moment of anger and you regret it,
(10:58):
it's never too late get old of this. It is
never too late to reach out and apologize and to
see if there's a way to rebuild the bridge. It's
gonna take you swallowing your pride. It's gonna take you
saying I'm wrong. It's gonna take you saying I screwed up.
(11:20):
It's gonna take you saying a lot of things and
meaning it. You can look at me and say you're sorry,
But if your actions does not follow your apology, your
apology sucks either way. The goal is to move forward
without bitterness. You can walk away from someone without hating them,
(11:43):
and you can protect yourself without destroying someone else's dignity.
There are people that I've walked away from today that
I can if I see them out in the store,
if I see them out about, I can say hey,
how are you. I can be nice to them. I
don't have to be their best friend. I don't have
to love them like a best friend, but I will
love them from a distance. So here's the takeaway. Not
(12:11):
every bridge should be burned, and not every bridge should
be rebuilt. Wisdom lies in knowing when to burn the
bridge and when to rebuild the bridge. As I wrap
up today, if this episode made you think about a
bridge in your own life, whether you've burn it, rebuild it,
(12:36):
or you're still in the process trying to figure out
which way to go with it, I'd love to hear
your story. Send me a message, email me Pastor Smith
three eight seven at gmail dot com, or leave a
comment I say hey, I'd like some advice on what
(12:59):
to do. Thanks for listening and I'll see you next
time we jump in together. Have a great day. Thank
you for listening to today's episode on Jumping with Jonathan,
and keep in mind that life is better when you
jump in. Have a blessed day.
Hey, friends, I'm Jonathan Smith and this is Jump In
with Jonathan, the podcast that makes you think, smile and
take action. Are you ready to jump in this show
with me? Let's go. Hey everyone, welcome back to Jump
In with Jonathan. I'm your host, Jonathan Smith. Today we're
(00:22):
going to be diving into a phrase we've all heard
and at some point in our lives, maybe even lived out.
It is the phrase called burning bridges. You know what
I'm talking about, walking away from a relationship, a friendship,
or even a job, and knowing once you walk away,
there's no turning back. Sometimes it's deliberate, sometimes it's accidental.
(00:48):
But here's the question. When is burning a bridge the
right move? And when does it make life harder down
the road. See, when we burn a bridge, it's a
fifty to fifty shot if we ever will get a
second chance or not. So I want to give you
number one what burning a bridge really means. Burning a
(01:08):
bridge is more than just leaving someone or something behind.
It's cutting off the possibility of going back. It can
happen in different situations. Quitting a job in frustration without notice.
I've done that once or twice, ending a friendship with
a final text or a big blow up or cussing
(01:31):
them out. That's sad because you've called this person a friend,
you've considered this person somewhat family, and now you've burnt
the bridge publicly calling out someone in a way that
makes reconciliation nearly impossible. The thing is, it's not always bad.
(01:53):
Sometimes the bridge you burn is the one that leads
you back to a place that's not healthy for you
you or healthy for your family. Other times, and this
is the hardest one, it's a bridge you wish you
had it burned. I've burnt several bridges in my life.
(02:14):
There have been times that when I've burnt a bridge,
it was good for me. It was good for my
mental health, it was good for my family, it was
good for my relationship. It was good for lots of
different reasons. Then there's been other times that I've burnt
bridges and I stepped back and I'm like, oh my god,
what did I just do? Why in the world did
(02:35):
I do that? Why would I have burnt of all
the bridges, why would I have burnt this bridge? So
when I begin to look at that, I want to
give you something today on when is it wise to
burn a bridge. There are moments when burning a bridge
has self preservation, toxic environments, a workplace that's unethical, a
(03:00):
friend who constantly manipulates, or a relationship that's abusive that
at that moment it's very wise to burn a bridge.
I've burnt bridges in several of these areas. Protecting your
values of keeping the connection means betraying who you are.
You should never do anything that goes against your beliefs
(03:24):
as a person, whether you're a Christian or a non Christian.
We all have beliefs, we all have morals, we all
have values that we hold true to, and you and
I should not burn. You and I should not be
put in a place that we have to choose our
beliefs and our values over a decision. At that moment,
(03:47):
it is time to burn a bridge and do what
is right. Breaking harmful cycles. If you've been in the
same unhealthy pattern for years, Sometimes burning a bridge is
locking in the back door behind you. It makes sure
you don't slip back into a situation that you have
fault hard to escape. Sometimes you need to pour a
(04:10):
lot of gas across that bridge before you burn it.
That way, you make sure there's no turning back. That
is when it's wise. If you're in an abusive relationship
and you leave that relationship and they're begging you to
come back, Sam, please come back. If you come back,
I won't hit you no more if you come back,
I won't yell at you no more. If you come back,
(04:31):
I'll quit being a narcissist if you if you'll come back,
I won't be a manipulator. Do not go back. If
you come back, I promise I won't cheat on you again.
Do not go back. Burn that bridge. When you're getting
(04:52):
ready to walk out of a job because you've not
had a raise in several years, because you feel underappreciated
because of all of that, and you tell them I'm
going to leave, and all of a sudden they have
the money to give you a raise, and all of
a sudden they want to give you awards, and all
of a sudden they want to give you plaques to
make you feel good. Burn that bridge. Burn it. Go
(05:15):
somewhere that you don't have to beg for a raise.
Go somewhere that you don't have to ask to be recognized.
Go somewhere that appreciates you. Go to people that care
for you burn that bridge when it comes to a
friend who lies, who cheats, who steals from you, who
will who will say, let me borrow a couple dollars
(05:35):
and never pay it back, or who will use their
situation to manipulate you into giving them money, into giving
them sympathy, into giving them things, and then all of
a sudden you look and they didn't need them burn
that bridge. See, well, you've told me to burn a bridge.
Can we ever mend a bridge? Absolutely we can, And
(05:59):
that's what I want to look at next on every
On the other hand, sorry about that. On the other hand,
not every conflict needs to end with a big fire.
Not every conflict means that I have to burn a bridge,
or that I'm going to burn a bridge. Misunderstandings can
(06:24):
be fixed with real conversation, more than sending a text,
more than sending an email, more than sending a voice recording,
but meeting that other party face to face, saying let's
resolve this now. Sometimes swallowing your pride is the only
(06:47):
thing stopping you from repairing things. I've talked to people before,
and I've told them, I said, you need to man up,
you need a woman up. You need to tell them
I'm sorry. I didn't do nothing wrong. It doesn't matter.
Be the better person, be the bigger person, be willing
to step up and say, look, I'm sorry, I'm sorry
that we're fighting, I'm sorry that we're arguing. I'm sorry
(07:09):
that we're bickering. And I do not want to burn
this bridge. In the professional world, keeping relationship intact can
open doors. Later on a few months ago, I was
in a store and I was having a rough day.
I needed something and I jumped down someone's throat in
(07:33):
a store. And when I left that store, I felt
terrible about what I had done. So a couple months ago,
I went back into that store and found that person
and I apologized to them. And you know, ever since then,
I've built a relationship with that person. Not the open doors,
(07:56):
but because it was the right thing to do. The
key is asking yourself, is the damage really permanent? Or
am I just angry right now? Sometimes when you're having
a bad day, Sometimes when you're angry, sometimes when you're cranky,
and you know that if you say the wrong thing,
it's going to burn a bridge, Just be quiet and
move on. Everybody has an opinion. Opinions are like buttholes.
(08:18):
One percent of them stink. Okay, we're not all going
to agree with them, but at the end of the day,
don't let your anger cause you to burn a bridge
that if you will, just bite your tongue, bite your lip,
something that can be mended. So how do I decide
if I'm going to burn a bridge or if I'm
(08:40):
going to mend a bridge? Number One? Ask yourself? Is
this emotional or intentional? Am I gonna let my emotions
get ahead of me and burn this bridge? Or am
I intentionally burning this bridge because it's the best thing
for me at my situation? Ask yourself? Could boundaries fix
(09:04):
this instead of destruction? There's no boundaries in an abusive relationship.
There are no boundaries when dealing with a narcissist. There
are no boundaries when dealing with a manipulator. There are
no boundaries when someone cheats on you. There are no
boundaries in none of those things, and those things cannot
be fixed. I don't care what people say. I don't
care who says what. I was on a podcast a
(09:26):
couple of weeks ago, sitting down with someone and I
said on it's a cheater, always a cheater. If somebody
will cheat on you now, they'll cheat on you later
and out of the road. The other person in that
conversation said, that's not necessarily true. I totally disagree, So
take it for what you want. Can boundaries fix this
instead of destruction? Will this choice still makes sense in
(09:52):
a year. If you're in doubt about any of these questions,
when you're asking yourself this, take a breath. Step back
before making the final decision, Step back and process the
whole situation. A lot of us want to be reactive.
(10:17):
A lot of us want to react instantly, and sometimes
the best reaction is no reaction at all. Well, what
happens if I burn a bridge? Or what happens if
I'm in the bridge? How can I move forward without regret?
I'm glad you asked if you've already burned a bridge
and it still feels right, don't carry guilt. Sometimes letting
(10:37):
go is necessary. There are people that I have locked
out of my life. There are people that I've blocked
out of my life. There are people that I have
moved on from that to this day. I can see
them out, I can look at them and I'm like,
I'm glad that bridge is burnt. If you've burned a
bridge in a moment of anger and you regret it,
(10:58):
it's never too late get old of this. It is
never too late to reach out and apologize and to
see if there's a way to rebuild the bridge. It's
gonna take you swallowing your pride. It's gonna take you
saying I'm wrong. It's gonna take you saying I screwed up.
(11:20):
It's gonna take you saying a lot of things and
meaning it. You can look at me and say you're sorry,
But if your actions does not follow your apology, your
apology sucks either way. The goal is to move forward
without bitterness. You can walk away from someone without hating them,
(11:43):
and you can protect yourself without destroying someone else's dignity.
There are people that I've walked away from today that
I can if I see them out in the store,
if I see them out about, I can say hey,
how are you. I can be nice to them. I
don't have to be their best friend. I don't have
to love them like a best friend, but I will
love them from a distance. So here's the takeaway. Not
(12:11):
every bridge should be burned, and not every bridge should
be rebuilt. Wisdom lies in knowing when to burn the
bridge and when to rebuild the bridge. As I wrap
up today, if this episode made you think about a
bridge in your own life, whether you've burn it, rebuild it,
(12:36):
or you're still in the process trying to figure out
which way to go with it, I'd love to hear
your story. Send me a message, email me Pastor Smith
three eight seven at gmail dot com, or leave a
comment I say hey, I'd like some advice on what
(12:59):
to do. Thanks for listening and I'll see you next
time we jump in together. Have a great day. Thank
you for listening to today's episode on Jumping with Jonathan,
and keep in mind that life is better when you
jump in. Have a blessed day.
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