April 28, 2025 • 31 mins
Discover how devastating personal loss and a daughter's health crisis became the catalyst for Melissa Vera's remarkable transformation from teacher to successful blogger. In this moving episode, Melissa opens up about how the loss of her father and life's unexpected challenges pushed her to reimagine her path and embrace her true calling.
Through candid conversation, Melissa shares powerful insights about:
- Overcoming the fear of judgment
- Finding strength through creativity
- Balancing family responsibilities with personal growth
- Using faith as an anchor during difficult times
- Creating a meaningful legacy inspired by her father's Marine service
Her journey from feeling voiceless to becoming confidently authentic after 50 offers a compelling testament to the power of self-belief and resilience. The episode also explores her innovative project of writing Christmas cards to troops, honoring her father's memory while serving others.
Ready to be inspired? Listen to this transformative episode about turning life's biggest challenges into opportunities for growth and authentic living.
Through candid conversation, Melissa shares powerful insights about:
- Overcoming the fear of judgment
- Finding strength through creativity
- Balancing family responsibilities with personal growth
- Using faith as an anchor during difficult times
- Creating a meaningful legacy inspired by her father's Marine service
Her journey from feeling voiceless to becoming confidently authentic after 50 offers a compelling testament to the power of self-belief and resilience. The episode also explores her innovative project of writing Christmas cards to troops, honoring her father's memory while serving others.
Ready to be inspired? Listen to this transformative episode about turning life's biggest challenges into opportunities for growth and authentic living.
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
What do you do when life challenges you to the core,
testing your resolve and pushing you beyond your limits. For
Melissa Vera, the answer lies in resilience, self belief, in
a leap of faith. Living in North Carolina, Melissa's journey
has been shaped by a pastry of experiences, from the
(00:21):
values instilled in her as the daughter of a dedicated
marine to profound losses she has faced, including her father
and her daughter's health struggles. The turning point came in
twenty fourteen, when Melissa decided to pivot from her career
as an elementary school teacher to embrace the world of
blogging full time following the heart wrenching loss of her
(00:44):
father exactly one year after.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Her daughter's first seizure.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Today, she is not just a passionate storyteller in her
blog Adventures of Through a Mom, but also the host
of the podcast Chacked from the Blog Cabin and the
host of the DIY show on Market Live. Join us
on Life Factor Resilience Podcast in this episode as we
explore Melissa's inspiring journey of resilience, creativity, and the power
(01:12):
of faith.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
Sometimes life gives us lemons, Sometimes it gives us lemonade.
Other times it gives us something entirely out of left
field that makes us say w t F. But no
matter what obstacles come, there is most often a way
out on the other side, and we are once again victorious.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
My name is doctor Rome and you are listening to
my podcast about resilience. Every guest shares a tragedy to
triumph story to give listeners like you the inspiration to
push through every single day.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
Listen now as my guest shares how they were life jacked.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Hi, Melissa, welcome, Thank you so much for being a
guest on my show.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
How are you?
Speaker 5 (02:09):
I'm good?
Speaker 2 (02:10):
How are you doing, Doctor Road doing fabulous? I am
doing most fabulous.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Journey has included significant challenges, including your daughter's health issues
and of course losing your father. But you believe that
these experiences somehow shaped your perspective on life and resilience
House show.
Speaker 5 (02:31):
Well, first of all, it really made me stop and
think about, you know, the end of life, especially when
I lost my dad, about I don't want to look
back in my life and live feel like I have regrets.
I don't ever want to look back when I come
to the end of my life and say I should
have done this, I should have done that. And for
the longest time, that's how I was. I mean, I
literally was living in fear of judgment of others, especially
(02:54):
my mom. I had a very strained relationship with my mom.
I love my mom, but it was always if I
didn't do what she wanted me to. It was like
that unconditional love that a mother is supposed to have
for her daughter wasn't there with us. So yeah, so
that was a huge thing. I was always living in
fear of judgment. And when I hit fifty, I'm like,
(03:17):
I can't do this anymore. I can't see what everybody
else wants me to be because I'm so miserable in
my own life. And I'm like, because I'm trying to
live up to everybody else's expectations. When I finally started,
I want to say, living for me, but living for
my fam, my immediate family, my husband, and my three girls.
And when I made that turning point, my life just
(03:39):
became became clearer and clearer and clearer. When I lost
my dad to twenty fourteen, when I lost when it
started out, let me go back twenty fourteen, when my daughter,
my youngest daughter, at the time was in sixth grade.
She had her first and mini seizures that year, and
we weren't sure what had happened. We were sure the
(04:01):
pediatricians said, there's something showing up on our MRI. We're
not sure what it was. It could possibly be a
brain tumor. And at that point my world was spiraling.
And so I had to take a leave as an
elementary school teacher and take care of my daughter because
her school days and my school days didn't measure up
because the doctor wanted me to go half days. Wow.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
So yeah, you know, it's interesting you were in education.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
I'm still currently in education, twenty three year educator, and
it's amazing how we I don't want to say we
forget that we have our own children, because we don't
forget because we go home, we see them there there.
But I think that the expectation as an educator is
that we show up for other people's children every single day, right,
and we take care of them. We are all into them,
(04:54):
and sometimes we feel guilty we have to take off
work because we can't be there for everybody else's children,
but to take off work to be there for our children.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Did you ever.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Feel that kind of hug and pull that a lot
of us educators.
Speaker 5 (05:09):
Feel absolutely, because you know, sometimes when you're teaching, kids
are not getting what they need at home. So you're
trying to give them as much as you can. You know,
you're trying to be kind of, I won't say the parents,
but give them a loving environment for them to learn.
And I wasn't actually in music, so for kids that
wouldn't didn't excel into the regular curriculum in the classroom curriculum,
(05:34):
and they can excel in music or art or something
like that. And you can see their eyes light up
when you walk in the room knowing that they're gonna
have they're gonna learn something, but they're gonna embrace learning
and they're they're gonna love what they're learning. Doctor Martin
Luther King Junior's Day and one of my favorite lessons
that I ever taught throughout I was k through to
music was that I have a dream speech by doctor
(05:56):
Martin Luther King. And I'm going off a little bit,
but I actually played the whole speech for the kids
and told them to listen to the cadence, listen to
the rhythm, listen to this, listen to that, and they
got a better appreciation about who he was by just
making it come alive for them. So yes, I one
hundred percent would feel guilty because I'm like, these are
my kids, this is my lesson plan, you know, I
(06:17):
know how I want to teach it, and I'm not
sure if the people are actually going to be able
to be as creative as I am when I teach it.
So absolutely, one hundred percent the guilt factor was there.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
And you know, I never was a large group teacher.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
I was always a classroom teacher, teaching you know, grade
by grade, individual you know grades, but you know, and
then but then as a campus leader, as an assistant principle,
and I just remember that I would take my hat
off to large group teachers because you guys would see
every single child in the school. You would see every
(06:51):
single line, and then you would see them for multiple
years in a row. That you would impact that particular
child's life. So you know, if anybody's making an impact
on the teachers, our fine arts teachers for toure, I
mean we all are in education, but definitely our fine
art teachers, because you.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
See every kid in the school, every single kid exactly.
Speaker 5 (07:11):
Sometimes you don't want to see every kid in the school.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
Now that is also true. I guess it's two fold.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
Now I have to talk to you about your decision.
I mean a bold decision to leave your teaching career.
Of course, I'm not teaching anymore. I mean admin, as
if you've stated before. But I love this podcast. I
love doing this podcast.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
I love putting out the episodes every single week.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
I love the people that I meet, such as yourself,
who were fabulous, resilient people.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
But you decided to leave that career.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Behind and pursue blogging full time, Like, how did you
find how did you find the strength to do that?
Speaker 5 (07:52):
A lot of it was piggyback on of losing my dad.
My dad was such a big person in the community.
He would come in and volunteer all the time at
the school, in classrooms and doing everything. He was a
lines club. He would make sure the kids said what
they needed, all this stuff and so walking the first
(08:14):
time I walked the hall after my dad passed away,
I just couldn't do it anymore. I just said, there's
too many memories of my dad. The first year of
him being gone, I was focusing on getting my mom
through it because my mom and him have been married
for fifty five years when he passed away, and so
(08:35):
I was focused on getting my mom through the loss
of my dad, and I wasn't focusing on my own
mental health, on my own grieving process, because I was like, Okay,
what's the next step to get my mom to get
her through this? Because he died in January, his birthday
was in February, her birthday was in February, Valentine's Day
was in February, their anniversary is in February. So how
(08:59):
can I get her through all these milestones that were
coming up for her and my dad? So I just
said I need to take a step back. And I
couldn't deal with the memories of my dad and deal
with my own grief and try to deal to my
mom's group at the same time. It was just way
too much on me. So taking a step back from
the school system and saying, Okay, I'm going to focus
(09:20):
on mom and God, if this is what you want
me to do, let you know, show me a way
to do it. And at my dad's funeral, this one
lady who unfortunately the last couple of weeks she's passed
away very tragically passed away. She was a victim of
a sociless crime. But at my dad's funeral, and this
(09:42):
is the lady I've known all my life, hugged me
close and really hugged me tight and said, all the
stuff you're going through, which was my daughter's illness, the accident,
my dad's got in the hospice, and you passing away
was God calling you closer to Him, lean into your faith.
And I didn't think about it. I did at the time.
I'm like, this one's crazy. But looking back now, I
(10:03):
realized I could have not got through what I went
through in twenty fourteen without God. I may not have
leaned in him that he got me through it.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
Yeah, yes, it is amazing how, you know, we really
think about resilience as something that we do for ourselves
when sometimes we have to also carry the burdens of
others and likes for instance, with your mother, regardless of
the relationship that you and your mother had, you know,
had like you were her rock, like you were the
(10:35):
person for her at the time. And it's amazing how
we don't recognize it. But sometimes God is making us strong,
not necessarily for ourselves, but He is making us strong
for other people. I feel I feel like he's giving
us the tool for sure to be strong, because you
never know when the time is going to come when
(10:55):
you were going to have to be strong, either for
yourself or your family, for your children, for your maybe
people at work, or like you said, you you know,
in your instance, for your mother. It's just very interesting.
So with that, with your leap of faith, because that's
pretty much what you did. You just took a leap
of faith. And I know it was influenced by your father,
(11:17):
But there's a lot of uncertainty that comes with making
a decision like that, leaving you know, guaranteed money to
go and do something that you really don't know how
it's going to turn out.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
Now, luckily for you it's turned out well, So prays
back to that, But you.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
Know, how how did you handle that uncertainty even in
the midst of going through all the other things that
you were going through.
Speaker 5 (11:43):
I guess one of the things I did was definitely
deso more time to prayer, to that more time into
reading the word. I really honestly said, God, this is
what you want me to do. What it happened, and
I just leaned into that. I that's twenty fifteen is
when I went full time. Twenty eighteen, I purchased the
(12:04):
first of what I called the blog Cabin, which is
a she shed. I bought it with all the money
I had made from blogging, and my husband did all
the sweat equity, but I designed it. And just this
past year I actually had an extension bought another building
and we joined the two buildings together. So my office
is bigger now. So I know God is where God
(12:27):
wants me to be, and I feel like He's pointing
me to other things too in this kind of space,
you know, like, Okay, now that you have this space,
what are you going to do to help raise awareness
of me? What are you going to do to increase
faith of others? So I feel like that's my calling now,
is like coming in and saying, Okay, I need to
(12:47):
start playing out what this year is going to bring
and then just pray about it, honestly, because I prayed
and prayed and prayed us Like, God, I know this
is what you want me to do. I feel it
in my bones. But if it's not, give me signs.
And there was never a sign. There was always more
for prosperity and even when COVID hit and I thought,
oh great, I'm gonna my income's going to tank. But
(13:09):
instead I was in a mindset challenge, and that's where
Chap from the Block Cabin the podcast came out of.
Because I enjoyed talking to people and having conversations. Normally
I wouldn't. I wasn't like that. I was Give me
in front of a group of kids all day long,
I would be like rolling things off the top of
my head, not even having to worry about what I
was saying. But give me in front of a group
(13:31):
of my peers, and forget it. I would not even
have been able to do this interview with you dot
the road, but I knew my God has given me
that confidence to go out and speak out, whereas before
when I was growing up, my voice was never heard
because I was the youngest of four girls.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
So wow, I want to go back to something that
you said that resonated with me. You said earlier that
you've embraced life free from others judgments and boundaries as
you approach your fifty and I think about myself. I'm
about five years away from fifty and I am beginning
(14:09):
to just, you know, take my ego out of a
lot of situations and just not worry about it.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
Like just let it go.
Speaker 6 (14:18):
And just you know, and I know, I don't know
if you know are familiar with Neil Robbins has this
theory called let them the left up theory is just like,
let them, you know, think what they let people think
what they want to think, let them be late, let
them do whatever it.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Is that they want to do.
Speaker 7 (14:34):
Right.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
And so you say that's incredibly freeing.
Speaker 5 (14:39):
How so one is because you start focusing on instead
of focusing on those small things, you're looking at the
bigger picture and you're looking at okay, if this is
this going to fulfill me as a person, and or
is this going to fulfill somebody else's idea of what
I'm supposed to be. And that's huge because once you
(14:59):
start start living for yourself, and I don't want to
say selfishly, but start living and doing things that make
you feel good without the fear of judgment, about the
fear of oh my gosh, what people are gonna think
if they see this, if they see that.
Speaker 7 (15:13):
Once you start living like that, it's just your It
lightens the load off of you. It just takes that
huge weight off your shoulder because being me and the
four girls, I was very judged.
Speaker 5 (15:25):
I was very judged. I was told at an early
age by one of my sisters and my mom of grade,
that I shouldn't call myself pretty, and nobody in my
lifetime would ever call me pretty, and just that just
damaged my emotional health. And I swore when I became
a mom that I wasn't going to be the mom
(15:47):
that I had. I wanted to be the mom to
my girls that I didn't have, and for a while
there I struggled with that. And even the girls. Now
my girls are older, my girls are twenty nine, twenty six,
twenty two, but they see now the last couple of years,
once I hit fifty, that was like six years ago,
the change in my mindset, the change in the way
(16:09):
I am with them, And they're like, Mom, you're not
our mom, and I'm like, what do you mean. She's like, well,
I don't think of you as our mom. I think
of you as a friend who happens to be my mom.
And that's the greatest compliment any of them could give me.
It's because they saw the change, they saw how I
was working on myself. They saw how I'm not so
up tight, how I'm not so well tight and so
(16:30):
anxious and fly off the handle, because that's how I
grew up. I grew up. My family was rage and regret.
They would be upset about anything, and then they would
say whatever they would thought out of their mouths, and
then then we would regret it later, or some of
them didn't regret it, And I'm just like, I can't
do that anymore. I can't rage and regret because it
was making me feel so awful, and I had empathy
(16:54):
for other people, and I could see both sides of stories,
but they couldn't see my side of anything. I've been
told that my voice didn't matter. I was told everything
that I was feeling was all in my head, that
you know, it didn't happen like that, instead of saying, well,
maybe it did happen because of the way you recollected it,
but I don't recall it happening like that.
Speaker 2 (17:16):
So well, man, I can tell you the strongest one
of these.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
I mean, my grandmother used to tell me all the time,
you know different, you know bites of wisdom. But one
of the things that she used to tell me is
your perception is your reality. And as much as people
can tell you what you're not seeing or what you're
not feeling, but if that is what you feel that
you are seeing, or that is what you feel that
you are feeling, that is absolutely what's going on for you.
(17:42):
I mean, but it's amazing how people can just try
to tell you, you know, what you are feeling, what
you are you know, thinking.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
It's it's quite amazing. It's quite amazing that people can
do that.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
And I just wonder where they get the gall I
guess to exact other people cool amazing.
Speaker 5 (18:02):
I have no idea. I mean, I've never I've always
been like I can see quo spies of both stories,
and you know, it just bothers me so much.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
No, most definitely.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
Now, you started an aid project to honor your dad
using Christmas cards that you found at your mother's house.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Can you share with the listeners a little bit about
this project?
Speaker 5 (18:24):
Okay, my mom passed away in twenty twenty three, and
obviously twenty twenty three, and as we were going through,
oh my gosh, this one thing, I'm gonna give them
a little tidbit right now. But if you have kids,
go ahead and declutter your house as much as you can,
because oh my gosh, it took us every year to
get through her stuff. But during the time that we
(18:46):
were going through my mom's stuff, we found a whole
bunch of open, unopened Christmas cards. I mean, I know
it can literally like she would buy my clearance and
stuff like that. And there was like boxes and boxes
and boxes of them. So I took them because I
had done this before, but this particular one, I took
them and I wrote them all out and I'm still
(19:07):
continue to do this now and gave them to troops
because my dad was a marine. He died from exposure
of agent orange in Vietnam and the contaminated ward at
Tampa June. But that's something that he was who he was.
He embraced being a marine all his life. I mean,
he went from being military intelligence to a police officer
(19:30):
and everything else. He was one of these good guys,
you know, the ones that knew the community. They were
leasing new people by name, and so I wanted to
make sure that his legacy would continue on. And so
I started writing out Christmas cards to our troops, writing
in God bless you, thank you for your service. Just
write little personal notes and you can imagine that's if
(19:52):
you're sending cards out. I mean, we have boxes of
hum boxes that my hand would get tired after a while.
And I didn't unless some of my friends and some
of the girls got troops and things like that. And
I even had one person that had the Partnership for
Children that basically has all day cares that they're under,
and she got her the daycares to work at everything
(20:14):
out and send cards in as well. So that's just
something that I've started doing at Christmas time for the
treats because they're away from their families. And I know
my dad was deployed a lot, like he was in Vietnam,
but toward the end of his career was when I
was born, But throughout his career he was always being
deployed somewhere, so I know what he felt like to
(20:37):
be away from his family. So I wanted to make
sure these soldiers knew that we support them. We may
not support the wars, but we support the military as
far as you know. They're out there, they're doing what
they're what they signed up to do. They're putting their
life at risk for our freedom. So I want to
make sure that they know that they're supported, and that's
the way of continuing the legacy that my dad had.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
You didn't just prime contributed to the way you look
at resilience.
Speaker 5 (21:04):
Yes, I think the way I look at resilience it
definitely goes back to my dad because my dad, he
was diagnosed in nineteen ninety eight with non Hodgkins with foma,
and he did not pass away until twenty fifteen. And
I mean, yeah, January twenty fifteen, twenty fourteen, that's when
his non Hodgkins when foma ended up turning into simple
(21:26):
and fabin leukemia, which is the blood the blood cancer.
But yes, one hundred percent, it definitely because I saw
my dad go through. At one point, my mom had
knee surgery, knee replacement, and my dad literally was more
worried about my mom and he was driving forty five
minutes away to get his chemo, but he was more
(21:46):
worried about someone staying with my mom than someone going
with him to chemo. So definitely the resilience came from
him because I saw him never give up, always worried
about what, you know, how you going to leave my mom,
how he was gonna leave us, And he was sliding
into the very end. So definitely, my dad is my
role model and my hero.
Speaker 1 (22:08):
Now, of course people feel that take many different types
of personality traits or characteristics or tools or resources to
build resilient. But the listeners out there who may be
struggling with their own resilience, especially if they're feeling like
they're in families or environments where they are severely judged
(22:32):
or maybe they feel unsupported, what is your best advice
to help yourself build resilience.
Speaker 5 (22:41):
There It's like a there's a couple of things I
could say. Number one is start giving yourself positive tick talks.
Even if you have to write on your mirror, your
bathroom mirror or whatever sday, it's going to be a
good day because I got at this moment, you know,
something to feel gratitude about. Even if you don't feel gratitude,
(23:01):
you know you could say, hey, I had a great
breakfast today, or hey, you know what, I went for
a walk. Self care is very important too. For the
longest time, I felt so guilty about taking time out
for myself when I could be doing everything else for
everybody else. But you have to find things that work
for you, Like I prayer, is important for me. Devotion
(23:22):
is important to me. Spending time with friends is very
important to me. Friends that thought I want to do
a caveat of that. Friends that support you, Friends that
aren't afraid to tell you, you know what, you're going off
the rails a little bit, but not friends that are
going to go to you with judgment and say, you know,
well you don't like what you're doing. No, you want
a friend that's going to gentleely push you back to
(23:43):
where you're supposed to be, find your tribe. That's that's
important because that's and having a strong support system. My husband,
who I adore, My husband is my friend this country.
He's a negative of Mexico. Hey, it's him and my
girls are or someone that I can immediately you know,
if something's going great, I share it with them first
(24:05):
because I know they're gonna support me and cheer me on.
Whereas if I shared it with the family that I
had growing up, they were like, oh, really, okay, whatever
you know, and they blow it off because they don't understand.
Even to the day that up to the point and
my mom died, she didn't understand when I'm blogging was
and I tried to explain it to her and tell
her how I love to write, love to be creative,
and she's like, what do you do now? I don't
(24:29):
know how many times I explain it to her, so yeah,
just fine, just do it. Forget the naysayers. Then the
critical self talk, which is where I was at fault
a lot. I really if something ended up would go
wrong with with what I was doing. I was like, oh,
I taught my fault. I I was escape good in
(24:51):
the family, so I was escape goat in my mind
as well, like everything wasn't going right because of its
every because of me, because of who I was, And
that wasn't the case. It was just things weren't just
happening to flow the way it's supposed to flow. So
mindset coaching is huge. I did that, I'm still doing that.
(25:12):
Just work on yourself, work on making sure that you
are where you're supposed to be instead of where everybody
else wants you to be supposed to be. And I
know that's hard. The steady boundaries is important too, especially
when you look at someone and say I love you,
but I can't right now, I can't deal with this.
I love you. I'll be there if you need me,
but right now I need to take this break from you.
(25:34):
And that's important. I mean people may not understand it,
but that, oh well, that's just going to have bee
because in the end, you're going to be the one
that's living with the thoughts in your head. You're going
to be the one that's going to have the knots
in your stomach. They're going to forget about making you
feel crappy. You're the one that's going to have to
live with the consequences. So you're like, you know what,
(25:55):
I'm going to stand in my truth. And for the
longest time I didn't do that, and it was hard
to begin with.
Speaker 7 (26:01):
But the more you do it, the easier it becomes,
and the easiest way you can say it, then people
can start recognizing the changes in you, and then they
start reacting to you differently because they see the changes
in you.
Speaker 5 (26:14):
You know, I have one sister who likes to pull
in all the negative crap and throw it at you
when she gets upset, and I used to play into
that and throw it right back at her. And I'm like, nope, sorry,
I say you know what, I'll accept my part of
the blame and everything's going on but I'm not accepting
all the blame because we're both the blame. And when
(26:35):
I start doing that, the way she reacts to me
is totally different than people will see the change and
they'll slowly but surely come around to it. It'll be
hard at first, because studying boundaries is hard, and taking
time for self care, making sure that you're okay, whether
it's taking a walk. I started getting a facial facials
(26:57):
ever a year ago, almost to you years ago now,
and that's one thing. Get my hair done and getting
a facial it's two of the things that I make
sure is on my monthly schedule. And I know a
lot of people say, wow, that's a little conceited, but
it's ways to make me feel good and to relax
and just escape for a while.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
No, absolutely that setting boundaries and making sure that you
are intentional about self care. I tell you a lot
of those two things are just so important. And a
lot of times people think boundaries are for other people,
when no, the boundaries, setting the boundaries is actually for you.
It's the protection for yourself. It absolutely is, for sure, Melissa,
(27:39):
thank you so much for sharing your powerful story as
a guest today on this episode of Life Jack the
Resilience podcast. Your Journey illustrates the incredible strength that comes
from faith, self belief, and encourage to pursue one's passions
even missed adversity.
Speaker 2 (27:56):
As you continue to.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
Honor your father's legacy through your project and inspire others
with your creativity, may you find even more joy and
fulfillment in your endeavors. So how can listeners find and
connect with you?
Speaker 5 (28:09):
Instagram frugal Mom. That's where I'm most active. I am
on Facebook a little bit, but Instagram definitely frugal Mom.
You could also go to Adventures frugal mom dot com.
There's a contact me page if you want to contact
me me. Also check out the blog. It's it's really
kind of evolved into more of a like a better
(28:32):
homes and Garden type blog where but every once in
a while I do throw up personal posts up there.
Speaker 7 (28:38):
Chats in the blog cabin is available anywhere that you
listen to podcasts.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
Do you have any last words of encouragement for the listeners?
Speaker 5 (28:46):
Stop talking to yourself negative and be be who you
want to be, not who everybody else wants to be. Boundaries,
like I said, are important. Lean into something that's going
to bring you joy like from me, it was my faith.
It was those words that Miss Paula told me in
twenty fifteen, This is God called me closer to Him
(29:09):
and I was able to tell her at my mom's
funeral in twenty twenty three about how much those words
impacted me. And I think that's also important too, is
to if something has impacked you, or someone has impacked
you in a way that has changed your life, to
make sure that you tell them while they're so alive,
(29:29):
how much they've impacted your life. Looking back now, I
wish I had told my dad as much as I
know he knew, but I wish i'd actually vocalized it
to him how much being his daughter meant to me,
because that's so important to tell people what an impact
they have on your life, especially if it's a positive impact,
(29:50):
so that way they know that they're doing what God
told them to do as well.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
Well, Melissa, I appreciate the insights you've shared, and I
hope the listeners my inspiration and their own journeys. I
wish you and your family nothing but blessings and abundance.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
Please take care.
Speaker 5 (30:07):
Thank you, doctor Roy, Thank you for having me on
and guys, just do it. I mean, I feel like Nike,
just do it. I mean, honestly, find something that brings
you joy and make sure you protect yourself and have
a little self time, time for self care, because that's important.
That's one important Melissa Vera.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Everyone be sure to join me next time for more
uplifting stories and insights on resilience. Until then, keep pushing forward,
embrace the journey, and remember that every setback can lead
to a greater comeback. Doctor Rowe Anyway,
What do you do when life challenges you to the core,
testing your resolve and pushing you beyond your limits. For
Melissa Vera, the answer lies in resilience, self belief, in
a leap of faith. Living in North Carolina, Melissa's journey
has been shaped by a pastry of experiences, from the
(00:21):
values instilled in her as the daughter of a dedicated
marine to profound losses she has faced, including her father
and her daughter's health struggles. The turning point came in
twenty fourteen, when Melissa decided to pivot from her career
as an elementary school teacher to embrace the world of
blogging full time following the heart wrenching loss of her
(00:44):
father exactly one year after.
Speaker 2 (00:45):
Her daughter's first seizure.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
Today, she is not just a passionate storyteller in her
blog Adventures of Through a Mom, but also the host
of the podcast Chacked from the Blog Cabin and the
host of the DIY show on Market Live. Join us
on Life Factor Resilience Podcast in this episode as we
explore Melissa's inspiring journey of resilience, creativity, and the power
(01:12):
of faith.
Speaker 3 (01:15):
Sometimes life gives us lemons, Sometimes it gives us lemonade.
Other times it gives us something entirely out of left
field that makes us say w t F. But no
matter what obstacles come, there is most often a way
out on the other side, and we are once again victorious.
Speaker 4 (01:40):
My name is doctor Rome and you are listening to
my podcast about resilience. Every guest shares a tragedy to
triumph story to give listeners like you the inspiration to
push through every single day.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
Listen now as my guest shares how they were life jacked.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Hi, Melissa, welcome, Thank you so much for being a
guest on my show.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
How are you?
Speaker 5 (02:09):
I'm good?
Speaker 2 (02:10):
How are you doing, Doctor Road doing fabulous? I am
doing most fabulous.
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Journey has included significant challenges, including your daughter's health issues
and of course losing your father. But you believe that
these experiences somehow shaped your perspective on life and resilience
House show.
Speaker 5 (02:31):
Well, first of all, it really made me stop and
think about, you know, the end of life, especially when
I lost my dad, about I don't want to look
back in my life and live feel like I have regrets.
I don't ever want to look back when I come
to the end of my life and say I should
have done this, I should have done that. And for
the longest time, that's how I was. I mean, I
literally was living in fear of judgment of others, especially
(02:54):
my mom. I had a very strained relationship with my mom.
I love my mom, but it was always if I
didn't do what she wanted me to. It was like
that unconditional love that a mother is supposed to have
for her daughter wasn't there with us. So yeah, so
that was a huge thing. I was always living in
fear of judgment. And when I hit fifty, I'm like,
(03:17):
I can't do this anymore. I can't see what everybody
else wants me to be because I'm so miserable in
my own life. And I'm like, because I'm trying to
live up to everybody else's expectations. When I finally started,
I want to say, living for me, but living for
my fam, my immediate family, my husband, and my three girls.
And when I made that turning point, my life just
(03:39):
became became clearer and clearer and clearer. When I lost
my dad to twenty fourteen, when I lost when it
started out, let me go back twenty fourteen, when my daughter,
my youngest daughter, at the time was in sixth grade.
She had her first and mini seizures that year, and
we weren't sure what had happened. We were sure the
(04:01):
pediatricians said, there's something showing up on our MRI. We're
not sure what it was. It could possibly be a
brain tumor. And at that point my world was spiraling.
And so I had to take a leave as an
elementary school teacher and take care of my daughter because
her school days and my school days didn't measure up
because the doctor wanted me to go half days. Wow.
Speaker 2 (04:25):
So yeah, you know, it's interesting you were in education.
Speaker 1 (04:29):
I'm still currently in education, twenty three year educator, and
it's amazing how we I don't want to say we
forget that we have our own children, because we don't
forget because we go home, we see them there there.
But I think that the expectation as an educator is
that we show up for other people's children every single day, right,
and we take care of them. We are all into them,
(04:54):
and sometimes we feel guilty we have to take off
work because we can't be there for everybody else's children,
but to take off work to be there for our children.
Speaker 2 (05:04):
Did you ever.
Speaker 1 (05:04):
Feel that kind of hug and pull that a lot
of us educators.
Speaker 5 (05:09):
Feel absolutely, because you know, sometimes when you're teaching, kids
are not getting what they need at home. So you're
trying to give them as much as you can. You know,
you're trying to be kind of, I won't say the parents,
but give them a loving environment for them to learn.
And I wasn't actually in music, so for kids that
wouldn't didn't excel into the regular curriculum in the classroom curriculum,
(05:34):
and they can excel in music or art or something
like that. And you can see their eyes light up
when you walk in the room knowing that they're gonna
have they're gonna learn something, but they're gonna embrace learning
and they're they're gonna love what they're learning. Doctor Martin
Luther King Junior's Day and one of my favorite lessons
that I ever taught throughout I was k through to
music was that I have a dream speech by doctor
(05:56):
Martin Luther King. And I'm going off a little bit,
but I actually played the whole speech for the kids
and told them to listen to the cadence, listen to
the rhythm, listen to this, listen to that, and they
got a better appreciation about who he was by just
making it come alive for them. So yes, I one
hundred percent would feel guilty because I'm like, these are
my kids, this is my lesson plan, you know, I
(06:17):
know how I want to teach it, and I'm not
sure if the people are actually going to be able
to be as creative as I am when I teach it.
So absolutely, one hundred percent the guilt factor was there.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
And you know, I never was a large group teacher.
Speaker 1 (06:30):
I was always a classroom teacher, teaching you know, grade
by grade, individual you know grades, but you know, and
then but then as a campus leader, as an assistant principle,
and I just remember that I would take my hat
off to large group teachers because you guys would see
every single child in the school. You would see every
(06:51):
single line, and then you would see them for multiple
years in a row. That you would impact that particular
child's life. So you know, if anybody's making an impact
on the teachers, our fine arts teachers for toure, I
mean we all are in education, but definitely our fine
art teachers, because you.
Speaker 2 (07:06):
See every kid in the school, every single kid exactly.
Speaker 5 (07:11):
Sometimes you don't want to see every kid in the school.
Speaker 2 (07:14):
Now that is also true. I guess it's two fold.
Speaker 1 (07:18):
Now I have to talk to you about your decision.
I mean a bold decision to leave your teaching career.
Of course, I'm not teaching anymore. I mean admin, as
if you've stated before. But I love this podcast. I
love doing this podcast.
Speaker 2 (07:34):
I love putting out the episodes every single week.
Speaker 1 (07:36):
I love the people that I meet, such as yourself,
who were fabulous, resilient people.
Speaker 2 (07:41):
But you decided to leave that career.
Speaker 1 (07:43):
Behind and pursue blogging full time, Like, how did you
find how did you find the strength to do that?
Speaker 5 (07:52):
A lot of it was piggyback on of losing my dad.
My dad was such a big person in the community.
He would come in and volunteer all the time at
the school, in classrooms and doing everything. He was a
lines club. He would make sure the kids said what
they needed, all this stuff and so walking the first
(08:14):
time I walked the hall after my dad passed away,
I just couldn't do it anymore. I just said, there's
too many memories of my dad. The first year of
him being gone, I was focusing on getting my mom
through it because my mom and him have been married
for fifty five years when he passed away, and so
(08:35):
I was focused on getting my mom through the loss
of my dad, and I wasn't focusing on my own
mental health, on my own grieving process, because I was like, Okay,
what's the next step to get my mom to get
her through this? Because he died in January, his birthday
was in February, her birthday was in February, Valentine's Day
was in February, their anniversary is in February. So how
(08:59):
can I get her through all these milestones that were
coming up for her and my dad? So I just
said I need to take a step back. And I
couldn't deal with the memories of my dad and deal
with my own grief and try to deal to my
mom's group at the same time. It was just way
too much on me. So taking a step back from
the school system and saying, Okay, I'm going to focus
(09:20):
on mom and God, if this is what you want
me to do, let you know, show me a way
to do it. And at my dad's funeral, this one
lady who unfortunately the last couple of weeks she's passed
away very tragically passed away. She was a victim of
a sociless crime. But at my dad's funeral, and this
(09:42):
is the lady I've known all my life, hugged me
close and really hugged me tight and said, all the
stuff you're going through, which was my daughter's illness, the accident,
my dad's got in the hospice, and you passing away
was God calling you closer to Him, lean into your faith.
And I didn't think about it. I did at the time.
I'm like, this one's crazy. But looking back now, I
(10:03):
realized I could have not got through what I went
through in twenty fourteen without God. I may not have
leaned in him that he got me through it.
Speaker 1 (10:13):
Yeah, yes, it is amazing how, you know, we really
think about resilience as something that we do for ourselves
when sometimes we have to also carry the burdens of
others and likes for instance, with your mother, regardless of
the relationship that you and your mother had, you know,
had like you were her rock, like you were the
(10:35):
person for her at the time. And it's amazing how
we don't recognize it. But sometimes God is making us strong,
not necessarily for ourselves, but He is making us strong
for other people. I feel I feel like he's giving
us the tool for sure to be strong, because you
never know when the time is going to come when
(10:55):
you were going to have to be strong, either for
yourself or your family, for your children, for your maybe
people at work, or like you said, you you know,
in your instance, for your mother. It's just very interesting.
So with that, with your leap of faith, because that's
pretty much what you did. You just took a leap
of faith. And I know it was influenced by your father,
(11:17):
But there's a lot of uncertainty that comes with making
a decision like that, leaving you know, guaranteed money to
go and do something that you really don't know how
it's going to turn out.
Speaker 2 (11:28):
Now, luckily for you it's turned out well, So prays
back to that, But you.
Speaker 1 (11:34):
Know, how how did you handle that uncertainty even in
the midst of going through all the other things that
you were going through.
Speaker 5 (11:43):
I guess one of the things I did was definitely
deso more time to prayer, to that more time into
reading the word. I really honestly said, God, this is
what you want me to do. What it happened, and
I just leaned into that. I that's twenty fifteen is
when I went full time. Twenty eighteen, I purchased the
(12:04):
first of what I called the blog Cabin, which is
a she shed. I bought it with all the money
I had made from blogging, and my husband did all
the sweat equity, but I designed it. And just this
past year I actually had an extension bought another building
and we joined the two buildings together. So my office
is bigger now. So I know God is where God
(12:27):
wants me to be, and I feel like He's pointing
me to other things too in this kind of space,
you know, like, Okay, now that you have this space,
what are you going to do to help raise awareness
of me? What are you going to do to increase
faith of others? So I feel like that's my calling now,
is like coming in and saying, Okay, I need to
(12:47):
start playing out what this year is going to bring
and then just pray about it, honestly, because I prayed
and prayed and prayed us Like, God, I know this
is what you want me to do. I feel it
in my bones. But if it's not, give me signs.
And there was never a sign. There was always more
for prosperity and even when COVID hit and I thought,
oh great, I'm gonna my income's going to tank. But
(13:09):
instead I was in a mindset challenge, and that's where
Chap from the Block Cabin the podcast came out of.
Because I enjoyed talking to people and having conversations. Normally
I wouldn't. I wasn't like that. I was Give me
in front of a group of kids all day long,
I would be like rolling things off the top of
my head, not even having to worry about what I
was saying. But give me in front of a group
(13:31):
of my peers, and forget it. I would not even
have been able to do this interview with you dot
the road, but I knew my God has given me
that confidence to go out and speak out, whereas before
when I was growing up, my voice was never heard
because I was the youngest of four girls.
Speaker 1 (13:45):
So wow, I want to go back to something that
you said that resonated with me. You said earlier that
you've embraced life free from others judgments and boundaries as
you approach your fifty and I think about myself. I'm
about five years away from fifty and I am beginning
(14:09):
to just, you know, take my ego out of a
lot of situations and just not worry about it.
Speaker 2 (14:15):
Like just let it go.
Speaker 6 (14:18):
And just you know, and I know, I don't know
if you know are familiar with Neil Robbins has this
theory called let them the left up theory is just like,
let them, you know, think what they let people think
what they want to think, let them be late, let
them do whatever it.
Speaker 2 (14:33):
Is that they want to do.
Speaker 7 (14:34):
Right.
Speaker 2 (14:35):
And so you say that's incredibly freeing.
Speaker 5 (14:39):
How so one is because you start focusing on instead
of focusing on those small things, you're looking at the
bigger picture and you're looking at okay, if this is
this going to fulfill me as a person, and or
is this going to fulfill somebody else's idea of what
I'm supposed to be. And that's huge because once you
(14:59):
start start living for yourself, and I don't want to
say selfishly, but start living and doing things that make
you feel good without the fear of judgment, about the
fear of oh my gosh, what people are gonna think
if they see this, if they see that.
Speaker 7 (15:13):
Once you start living like that, it's just your It
lightens the load off of you. It just takes that
huge weight off your shoulder because being me and the
four girls, I was very judged.
Speaker 5 (15:25):
I was very judged. I was told at an early
age by one of my sisters and my mom of grade,
that I shouldn't call myself pretty, and nobody in my
lifetime would ever call me pretty, and just that just
damaged my emotional health. And I swore when I became
a mom that I wasn't going to be the mom
(15:47):
that I had. I wanted to be the mom to
my girls that I didn't have, and for a while
there I struggled with that. And even the girls. Now
my girls are older, my girls are twenty nine, twenty six,
twenty two, but they see now the last couple of years,
once I hit fifty, that was like six years ago,
the change in my mindset, the change in the way
(16:09):
I am with them, And they're like, Mom, you're not
our mom, and I'm like, what do you mean. She's like, well,
I don't think of you as our mom. I think
of you as a friend who happens to be my mom.
And that's the greatest compliment any of them could give me.
It's because they saw the change, they saw how I
was working on myself. They saw how I'm not so
up tight, how I'm not so well tight and so
(16:30):
anxious and fly off the handle, because that's how I
grew up. I grew up. My family was rage and regret.
They would be upset about anything, and then they would
say whatever they would thought out of their mouths, and
then then we would regret it later, or some of
them didn't regret it, And I'm just like, I can't
do that anymore. I can't rage and regret because it
was making me feel so awful, and I had empathy
(16:54):
for other people, and I could see both sides of stories,
but they couldn't see my side of anything. I've been
told that my voice didn't matter. I was told everything
that I was feeling was all in my head, that
you know, it didn't happen like that, instead of saying, well,
maybe it did happen because of the way you recollected it,
but I don't recall it happening like that.
Speaker 2 (17:16):
So well, man, I can tell you the strongest one
of these.
Speaker 1 (17:19):
I mean, my grandmother used to tell me all the time,
you know different, you know bites of wisdom. But one
of the things that she used to tell me is
your perception is your reality. And as much as people
can tell you what you're not seeing or what you're
not feeling, but if that is what you feel that
you are seeing, or that is what you feel that
you are feeling, that is absolutely what's going on for you.
(17:42):
I mean, but it's amazing how people can just try
to tell you, you know, what you are feeling, what
you are you know, thinking.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
It's it's quite amazing. It's quite amazing that people can
do that.
Speaker 1 (17:53):
And I just wonder where they get the gall I
guess to exact other people cool amazing.
Speaker 5 (18:02):
I have no idea. I mean, I've never I've always
been like I can see quo spies of both stories,
and you know, it just bothers me so much.
Speaker 2 (18:12):
No, most definitely.
Speaker 1 (18:14):
Now, you started an aid project to honor your dad
using Christmas cards that you found at your mother's house.
Speaker 2 (18:20):
Can you share with the listeners a little bit about
this project?
Speaker 5 (18:24):
Okay, my mom passed away in twenty twenty three, and
obviously twenty twenty three, and as we were going through,
oh my gosh, this one thing, I'm gonna give them
a little tidbit right now. But if you have kids,
go ahead and declutter your house as much as you can,
because oh my gosh, it took us every year to
get through her stuff. But during the time that we
(18:46):
were going through my mom's stuff, we found a whole
bunch of open, unopened Christmas cards. I mean, I know
it can literally like she would buy my clearance and
stuff like that. And there was like boxes and boxes
and boxes of them. So I took them because I
had done this before, but this particular one, I took
them and I wrote them all out and I'm still
(19:07):
continue to do this now and gave them to troops
because my dad was a marine. He died from exposure
of agent orange in Vietnam and the contaminated ward at
Tampa June. But that's something that he was who he was.
He embraced being a marine all his life. I mean,
he went from being military intelligence to a police officer
(19:30):
and everything else. He was one of these good guys,
you know, the ones that knew the community. They were
leasing new people by name, and so I wanted to
make sure that his legacy would continue on. And so
I started writing out Christmas cards to our troops, writing
in God bless you, thank you for your service. Just
write little personal notes and you can imagine that's if
(19:52):
you're sending cards out. I mean, we have boxes of
hum boxes that my hand would get tired after a while.
And I didn't unless some of my friends and some
of the girls got troops and things like that. And
I even had one person that had the Partnership for
Children that basically has all day cares that they're under,
and she got her the daycares to work at everything
(20:14):
out and send cards in as well. So that's just
something that I've started doing at Christmas time for the
treats because they're away from their families. And I know
my dad was deployed a lot, like he was in Vietnam,
but toward the end of his career was when I
was born, But throughout his career he was always being
deployed somewhere, so I know what he felt like to
(20:37):
be away from his family. So I wanted to make
sure these soldiers knew that we support them. We may
not support the wars, but we support the military as
far as you know. They're out there, they're doing what
they're what they signed up to do. They're putting their
life at risk for our freedom. So I want to
make sure that they know that they're supported, and that's
the way of continuing the legacy that my dad had.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
You didn't just prime contributed to the way you look
at resilience.
Speaker 5 (21:04):
Yes, I think the way I look at resilience it
definitely goes back to my dad because my dad, he
was diagnosed in nineteen ninety eight with non Hodgkins with foma,
and he did not pass away until twenty fifteen. And
I mean, yeah, January twenty fifteen, twenty fourteen, that's when
his non Hodgkins when foma ended up turning into simple
(21:26):
and fabin leukemia, which is the blood the blood cancer.
But yes, one hundred percent, it definitely because I saw
my dad go through. At one point, my mom had
knee surgery, knee replacement, and my dad literally was more
worried about my mom and he was driving forty five
minutes away to get his chemo, but he was more
(21:46):
worried about someone staying with my mom than someone going
with him to chemo. So definitely the resilience came from
him because I saw him never give up, always worried
about what, you know, how you going to leave my mom,
how he was gonna leave us, And he was sliding
into the very end. So definitely, my dad is my
role model and my hero.
Speaker 1 (22:08):
Now, of course people feel that take many different types
of personality traits or characteristics or tools or resources to
build resilient. But the listeners out there who may be
struggling with their own resilience, especially if they're feeling like
they're in families or environments where they are severely judged
(22:32):
or maybe they feel unsupported, what is your best advice
to help yourself build resilience.
Speaker 5 (22:41):
There It's like a there's a couple of things I
could say. Number one is start giving yourself positive tick talks.
Even if you have to write on your mirror, your
bathroom mirror or whatever sday, it's going to be a
good day because I got at this moment, you know,
something to feel gratitude about. Even if you don't feel gratitude,
(23:01):
you know you could say, hey, I had a great
breakfast today, or hey, you know what, I went for
a walk. Self care is very important too. For the
longest time, I felt so guilty about taking time out
for myself when I could be doing everything else for
everybody else. But you have to find things that work
for you, Like I prayer, is important for me. Devotion
(23:22):
is important to me. Spending time with friends is very
important to me. Friends that thought I want to do
a caveat of that. Friends that support you, Friends that
aren't afraid to tell you, you know what, you're going off
the rails a little bit, but not friends that are
going to go to you with judgment and say, you know,
well you don't like what you're doing. No, you want
a friend that's going to gentleely push you back to
(23:43):
where you're supposed to be, find your tribe. That's that's
important because that's and having a strong support system. My husband,
who I adore, My husband is my friend this country.
He's a negative of Mexico. Hey, it's him and my
girls are or someone that I can immediately you know,
if something's going great, I share it with them first
(24:05):
because I know they're gonna support me and cheer me on.
Whereas if I shared it with the family that I
had growing up, they were like, oh, really, okay, whatever
you know, and they blow it off because they don't understand.
Even to the day that up to the point and
my mom died, she didn't understand when I'm blogging was
and I tried to explain it to her and tell
her how I love to write, love to be creative,
and she's like, what do you do now? I don't
(24:29):
know how many times I explain it to her, so yeah,
just fine, just do it. Forget the naysayers. Then the
critical self talk, which is where I was at fault
a lot. I really if something ended up would go
wrong with with what I was doing. I was like, oh,
I taught my fault. I I was escape good in
(24:51):
the family, so I was escape goat in my mind
as well, like everything wasn't going right because of its
every because of me, because of who I was, And
that wasn't the case. It was just things weren't just
happening to flow the way it's supposed to flow. So
mindset coaching is huge. I did that, I'm still doing that.
(25:12):
Just work on yourself, work on making sure that you
are where you're supposed to be instead of where everybody
else wants you to be supposed to be. And I
know that's hard. The steady boundaries is important too, especially
when you look at someone and say I love you,
but I can't right now, I can't deal with this.
I love you. I'll be there if you need me,
but right now I need to take this break from you.
(25:34):
And that's important. I mean people may not understand it,
but that, oh well, that's just going to have bee
because in the end, you're going to be the one
that's living with the thoughts in your head. You're going
to be the one that's going to have the knots
in your stomach. They're going to forget about making you
feel crappy. You're the one that's going to have to
live with the consequences. So you're like, you know what,
(25:55):
I'm going to stand in my truth. And for the
longest time I didn't do that, and it was hard
to begin with.
Speaker 7 (26:01):
But the more you do it, the easier it becomes,
and the easiest way you can say it, then people
can start recognizing the changes in you, and then they
start reacting to you differently because they see the changes
in you.
Speaker 5 (26:14):
You know, I have one sister who likes to pull
in all the negative crap and throw it at you
when she gets upset, and I used to play into
that and throw it right back at her. And I'm like, nope, sorry,
I say you know what, I'll accept my part of
the blame and everything's going on but I'm not accepting
all the blame because we're both the blame. And when
(26:35):
I start doing that, the way she reacts to me
is totally different than people will see the change and
they'll slowly but surely come around to it. It'll be
hard at first, because studying boundaries is hard, and taking
time for self care, making sure that you're okay, whether
it's taking a walk. I started getting a facial facials
(26:57):
ever a year ago, almost to you years ago now,
and that's one thing. Get my hair done and getting
a facial it's two of the things that I make
sure is on my monthly schedule. And I know a
lot of people say, wow, that's a little conceited, but
it's ways to make me feel good and to relax
and just escape for a while.
Speaker 1 (27:16):
No, absolutely that setting boundaries and making sure that you
are intentional about self care. I tell you a lot
of those two things are just so important. And a
lot of times people think boundaries are for other people,
when no, the boundaries, setting the boundaries is actually for you.
It's the protection for yourself. It absolutely is, for sure, Melissa,
(27:39):
thank you so much for sharing your powerful story as
a guest today on this episode of Life Jack the
Resilience podcast. Your Journey illustrates the incredible strength that comes
from faith, self belief, and encourage to pursue one's passions
even missed adversity.
Speaker 2 (27:56):
As you continue to.
Speaker 1 (27:57):
Honor your father's legacy through your project and inspire others
with your creativity, may you find even more joy and
fulfillment in your endeavors. So how can listeners find and
connect with you?
Speaker 5 (28:09):
Instagram frugal Mom. That's where I'm most active. I am
on Facebook a little bit, but Instagram definitely frugal Mom.
You could also go to Adventures frugal mom dot com.
There's a contact me page if you want to contact
me me. Also check out the blog. It's it's really
kind of evolved into more of a like a better
(28:32):
homes and Garden type blog where but every once in
a while I do throw up personal posts up there.
Speaker 7 (28:38):
Chats in the blog cabin is available anywhere that you
listen to podcasts.
Speaker 2 (28:43):
Do you have any last words of encouragement for the listeners?
Speaker 5 (28:46):
Stop talking to yourself negative and be be who you
want to be, not who everybody else wants to be. Boundaries,
like I said, are important. Lean into something that's going
to bring you joy like from me, it was my faith.
It was those words that Miss Paula told me in
twenty fifteen, This is God called me closer to Him
(29:09):
and I was able to tell her at my mom's
funeral in twenty twenty three about how much those words
impacted me. And I think that's also important too, is
to if something has impacked you, or someone has impacked
you in a way that has changed your life, to
make sure that you tell them while they're so alive,
(29:29):
how much they've impacted your life. Looking back now, I
wish I had told my dad as much as I
know he knew, but I wish i'd actually vocalized it
to him how much being his daughter meant to me,
because that's so important to tell people what an impact
they have on your life, especially if it's a positive impact,
(29:50):
so that way they know that they're doing what God
told them to do as well.
Speaker 1 (29:54):
Well, Melissa, I appreciate the insights you've shared, and I
hope the listeners my inspiration and their own journeys. I
wish you and your family nothing but blessings and abundance.
Speaker 2 (30:06):
Please take care.
Speaker 5 (30:07):
Thank you, doctor Roy, Thank you for having me on
and guys, just do it. I mean, I feel like Nike,
just do it. I mean, honestly, find something that brings
you joy and make sure you protect yourself and have
a little self time, time for self care, because that's important.
That's one important Melissa Vera.
Speaker 1 (30:25):
Everyone be sure to join me next time for more
uplifting stories and insights on resilience. Until then, keep pushing forward,
embrace the journey, and remember that every setback can lead
to a greater comeback. Doctor Rowe Anyway,
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