April 4, 2025 • 46 mins
Colette Cottman is a retired Army Combat Officer and accomplished corporate strategist with over two decades of experience in human resources, diversity, equity, inclusion, and belonging (DEIB). She has led enterprise-level training, workforce development, and DEIB initiatives at companies like Microsoft and TEKsystems, and is a certified business coach and Microsoft Certified Trainer.
With a strong background in IT, organizational psychology, and community development, Colette empowers leaders to build inclusive cultures and drive transformational change. Her passion lies in mentoring, advocacy, and creating impactful experiences that foster growth, belonging, and leadership beyond the uniform.
With a strong background in IT, organizational psychology, and community development, Colette empowers leaders to build inclusive cultures and drive transformational change. Her passion lies in mentoring, advocacy, and creating impactful experiences that foster growth, belonging, and leadership beyond the uniform.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:29):
Are you a transitioning military or veteran woman looking for support, guidance,
and inspiration. You've come to the right place. Welcome to
Living Unapologetically Beyond the Uniform with your host, Renee Jones Hudson.
Renee brings powerful stories, practical advice, and expert insights to
help you redefine, rediscover, and reaffirm your life after military service,
(00:54):
whether navigating a career change, seeking personal growth, or focusing
on your well being. We're here to would empower you
every step of the way. So welcome the host of
Living Unapologetically Beyond the Uniform, Renee Jones Hudson. Let's embark
on this journey together.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Hello, and welcome back to another episode of Living Unapologetically
Beyond the Uniform. I'm your host, Renee Jones Hutson, and
I'm glad you're tuning in today. We have some technical difficulties,
but we figured it out and now we're here. So
I know I say this often, but this week's guest
(01:38):
she is truly someone you want to lean in and
learn from. I am so honored to sit down with
a powerhouse decorated veteran, strategic leader and community advocate whose
mission goes far beyond the boardroom. My guest today is
Miss Collette Kopman. She is a retired Army combat officer,
(02:02):
a senior strategist and diversity and inclusion manager at Tech Systems,
and the vice president of the Atlanta Chapter of the
Women's Interactive Women's Veterans Interactive Foundation. She's held key leadership
roles at companies like Microsoft, led enterprise programs across it
HR and operations, and she holds impressive degrees and certifications.
(02:28):
But what sets her apart is her heart. She pours
into people through advocacy, mentorship, and she has a passion
for building inclusive spaces that fosters real belonging. Today, we're
going to talk about what it means to lead beyond
the uniform.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
We're going to.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
Also tap into navigating the corporate world without losing your
voice and how to use your influence to uplift others,
especially women veterans. So collect welcome to the show. I
am so excited for this conversation. Hi, I'm excited to
be here. Thanks for having me. Thank you so much
(03:08):
for joining. I appreciate you. Let's start, you know, from
the beginning, where did it all begin? Tell us a
little bit about your background, what led you to join
the military, and what was that experience like for you.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
Sure, so, I am how.
Speaker 5 (03:29):
Do I start? I was.
Speaker 4 (03:33):
Twenty eight years old working at the Internal Revenue Service,
and I realized that I was going nowhere fast right
in spite of my ambition. I was just caught in
that golden handcuffed of the government service, and I thought,
how can I do something different? So I went to
(03:55):
school at night to learn computer networking and.
Speaker 5 (04:00):
Went to work at Honeywell.
Speaker 4 (04:03):
But then they the part of Honeywell that I worked
at that bought out by ge and at the time
they were really leaning into that lean six sigma where
you do more with less and I just feed. So
one of my leaders was a lieutenant in the army,
and she said, you would make a wonderful soldier and
(04:25):
probably even better officer. You ever thought about going on
the military, and I cringed. Of course, I was like, no,
I'm almost thirty years old, mom of two kids, and
I don't think that's going to work.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
She said, Okay, you try it, and not even six
months later I was enlisting and going to boot camp. Wow,
how was that for you?
Speaker 3 (04:50):
Though?
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Because you know, most of my guests we've started at eighteen,
so you know, and I didn't even know that about you.
So how was that coming? And like, you know, already adult,
you had children already and everything. Almost thirty, you said,
how was that experience?
Speaker 4 (05:09):
Yeah, So by the time I finished boot camp, I
was thirty.
Speaker 5 (05:15):
It was twenty two thousand and one, so it was tough.
Speaker 4 (05:21):
I was about two hundred and twenty pounds, two kids,
mom at home watching after them, and in boot camp
I ended up having two kids, if you will. The
drill sergeants hooked one of the folks that was struggling
onto my back and the other one was my bunk.
Speaker 5 (05:41):
Major was seventeen.
Speaker 3 (05:44):
Wow. So it was.
Speaker 5 (05:46):
Being a mom in basic.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Wow. Wow, being a mom for real, and being a
mom to the kids in racing.
Speaker 5 (05:57):
Yes, of people's chosen.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
Yeah, yes, So transitional transition from the military can be
a real identity shift. What did your transition to civilian
life look like for you? Was it what you expected
or did you navigate some of some unexpected pivots? And
then you know, with you going in at an older age,
you've already experienced a civilian world prior to joining the service,
(06:22):
So I'm curious to learn how you know the comparison
between the two.
Speaker 4 (06:31):
So I'll tell you it's interesting because the expectations are
set for you in the military that this is it, right,
the military is everything, and so the expectation is to
be overwhelmed and confused, and.
Speaker 5 (06:49):
I felt a little bit of that.
Speaker 4 (06:51):
But to your point, I'd already been in civilian life before,
but this time I was going in as a leader,
and so so I took my leadership from the military
and the experience that I had, building connections, understanding the
landscape going in, and then just imparting my spirit into
(07:15):
what I was doing. So I felt initially concerned, just
based on what I'd been told to expect, and then
the Headhunters came out nowhere with all these different opportunities
than I was confused.
Speaker 5 (07:35):
I got right like, what is all this okay?
Speaker 2 (07:43):
I said, you know what, I've always been athletic, and
I love clothes and attired pats and earrings and things
like that.
Speaker 4 (07:54):
So, in honor of my dad, who I lost two
years before I got it got restless soul, I said,
you know what, I'm going to go work for fanatics.
They sell apparel. They are focused on sports and memorabilia.
I get to walk in the door making enough to
(08:14):
stay hole.
Speaker 5 (08:16):
Yeah, and I.
Speaker 4 (08:17):
Jumped right onto the opportunity to be an HRM in
corporate at a company that I admired.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Yeah. You know What's it's interesting how we always fall
back to that one thing that we're so good at
that and that's familiar to us, you know, it's what
gets us to It's almost like it's just a stepping
stone to where we need to be. We just need
to hold space right now in that place till we
kind of figure out who we're trying to get to.
(08:47):
So I love exactly. So looking at the work you're
doing now in the corporate space and community advocacy, what
is your why today? What fuels your past?
Speaker 5 (09:03):
Yeah? So many things.
Speaker 4 (09:07):
After my first job out of the military, I realized
I wanted to feel more than just good at my job, right.
Speaker 5 (09:17):
I wanted to feel like I.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
Was having impact and the purpose that I was given
by God and the reason for me being here needed
to be fulfilled. So I left that job and went
to a nonprofit Higher Heroes, and it actually brought me
to where I lived. Yeah, So that was my first
(09:44):
foray into living a purpose build life, and I realized
fairly quickly that it was so limited in the role
itself as a career counselor that I wanted to do more.
I was also working with a gentleman that I had met,
and he was having some health issues and had taken
(10:07):
on the responsibility of a young sibling. He and I
are both in our fifties and his sibling was in
elementary school. So I said, you know what, I'm not
loving what I'm doing in terms of the impact I
expected it to have, and I really want to help
nurture this young woman and help him. So I left
(10:30):
and went into substitute teaching and fell in love with
the kiddos and seeing the shine through their pieces.
Speaker 5 (10:40):
He had a discovery, right.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
I just love how you pivot and pivot and pivot.
That's what I say. Just you know, keep trying until
you find that thing that really like holds you in
that space, you know. So I love that.
Speaker 3 (10:57):
So yeah, no, I was just gonna tell you what
because okay, I was.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
I was subbing and the kids were just lighting up
and one of the things that I love to share
with them was coding, and you know how they could
use different types of it because I did that in
the military. And funny enough, Yeah, one of the gentlemen
that came to see what we were doing at the
(11:26):
middle school was from Microsoft, and he and I had
worked together in Jacksonville when I was at Fanatics and
he said, you know what I need somebody in my
community department. Is that something you'd be interested in? I
was like, are you kidding me? Microsoft? Absolutely? Yeah, yeah,
(11:51):
And that leads me to this next question that I
was gonna ask. So, you've held leadership roles like in
organizations like mysolt and now tech Systems, right, and you're
leading efforts and diversity, equity, inclusion. And I had to
figure out what the bee was belonging forgive me, So,
(12:15):
what does real belonging look like to you? And what's
still missing in today's corporate culture.
Speaker 5 (12:24):
Yes, that's a powerful question.
Speaker 4 (12:28):
And you mentioned you had to think about what does
the bee stand for? And so long it was not
part of the right, right, but it really is the
thing that makes us want to help one another. So
often you think about the anti bullying movement and work
(12:49):
building and all of those components of making people feel
like they're a part of something significant so that they
want to do more. Or I saw a quote that said,
the people that you care for do the work that
you give them with care. Yeah, and so to me,
(13:12):
I feel like a lot of times that's what's missing
in the organizations is that we focus so much on
the bottom line, hitting those metrics, making the sausage right, No,
you don't so much for it, the seasoning, the packaging it,
(13:34):
I mean so good.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Yeah, yes, that's a good part, a good part.
Speaker 4 (13:42):
But that's of belonging I have missed over and over again.
Even in the military, you'd see those couple folks sitting
off to the side and you think they don't get part.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
Of well they do, and they just are not being
welcomed in on those strengths that they have. So I
think sometimes.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
What's missing and belonging is that people don't recognize the
significance of the feeling that's yeah, well part of as
opposed to just being one of the cogs in the machine.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
You know, that's what I love about US military, US veterans.
It's just crazy, it's just I don't know, you know,
we don't know how to explain that connection. Like I
don't like even you and I met at Mission Continues
and just but it was all you know, all of
(14:41):
us veterans, all of us women, and we just just
started talking like we knew each other. We were all
in the same unit, like we serve this role. But
that's what I love about our community, you know, it's
just that that common that common experience that we have,
you know, that just pulls us. We can start talking
about one thing and we all just go down this
(15:03):
rabbit hole about you know, a whole bunch of stuff.
So I hours, I get that belonging piece and like
I said, you know, at first before I didn't, you know,
I didn't recognize what that was. And I was like, oh,
that makes so much sense. It does make sense. And
you really do you really? Do you really live that.
(15:25):
I can speak to that, especially with you know, with
us doing some projects together. So I I, you're walking
the talk or is it you're talking?
Speaker 3 (15:36):
Yeah, you're walking the talk.
Speaker 5 (15:40):
I talk.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Oh no, don't even give me the lie about the songs. Now, okay,
So what are some of the common misconceptions that you
encounter when it comes to DEIB and how do you
challenge those outdated mindsets and inspire authentic change.
Speaker 5 (16:09):
So this is the thing.
Speaker 4 (16:13):
When we oversimplify and sometimes we put acronyms on things,
they take on a different life than the intent, and
sometimes it opens the door for that intent to be
misinterpreted or misused. And I believe what's happened with the
(16:37):
concept is that people have been afraid of the change
that was happening and let that fear take over. One
thing that I know for sure is that everyone wants
(16:58):
to thrive, Everyone wants to be part of right. Inclusion
is all about us coming together and being the best
that we can together. And when it gets misconstrued, I say,
let's go back to the basics. Let's get away from
(17:20):
the actrom let's pull it up. We're talking about humanity.
We're talking about yeah, just getting the best you can
out of yourself and other people's energy.
Speaker 5 (17:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Move.
Speaker 4 (17:39):
You know those moments when you feel like, oh man,
I don't feel like it today.
Speaker 2 (17:45):
Yeah, that's why I loves Yeah. Yeah, that's why you
like you have always every time I see you, I'm like, yes,
it's today, probably wired. I get wired.
Speaker 5 (18:06):
Yes, No, that's.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
I do believe diversity too. No, I was just gonna
say I do believe you know, once I understood it
that there is power and proximity and there it's and
you literally have to find your tribe because sometimes that's
all I need. I need to get plugged in, I
get I need to get juiced up, and then when
I get around light minded people, you know, I'm like, yeah,
(18:33):
thank you. You know, so I just get the energy
verse that I need and I'm good.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
That's it and we have a good time. Right, So
I think we do.
Speaker 4 (18:45):
To answer your question, I guess I'll go back to
people talking about inclusion and diversity. It really is all
about being human, appreciating that we cannot do it all
alone and that we can help to fill each other's
gaps and rise the tide together.
Speaker 5 (19:06):
Right.
Speaker 4 (19:07):
Really, all we're talking about here, it's just operationalized in
a concept that can be used in a business setting.
The outcomes I think made some folks fearful because it
gave them a little bit of push. Now that everyone
(19:28):
is getting an opportunity, it means there's more competition.
Speaker 5 (19:35):
Yeah, it also means you can't.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
Hide, and so that causes a little heartburn. But the
beauty is that challenge is what makes us so much better. Yeah,
and all the voices. It opens the aperture so we
don't miss things. I think about the fitbits. When I
(20:01):
first got my fitbit, it didn't work, probably ten years ago.
They weren't designed with people with darker skin in mind.
Oh wow, And.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
So they didn't work with the water when you go
to the water, try to turn it on.
Speaker 4 (20:18):
They weren't designed with darker skin in mind, and so
they didn't recognize the hand.
Speaker 5 (20:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (20:27):
And so I realized generative AI needs to have voices
and perspectives of different backgrounds, different humans to support taking
care of other humans.
Speaker 5 (20:42):
Because really that's all we do in business.
Speaker 4 (20:44):
Sales is all about a solution to a p and
you buy from who you love or who you feel comfortable.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
Right right, More people and you have more success.
Speaker 5 (20:58):
Yeah, you just.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Edge it kidding me about the fitbit though, that was
like my whole moment right there.
Speaker 5 (21:04):
I was like, oh I did not know that.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Wow. Okay, So with your you have a strong background
in AI, I mean in it and hr what is
a rare but powerful Well I actually put it like,
it's how has that unique skills to help you lead
and build system that support people.
Speaker 4 (21:27):
Yes, so interestingly, I didn't know that there were so
few people that had those two backgrounds, and coming into
an IT company, I wanted to be involved in the community,
but I also wanted to lean into the now and
(21:49):
on the bleeding edge of it. And so when the
pandemic hit and there was difficulty with face to face,
no one knew how to continue to have their businesses flowing.
Speaker 5 (22:04):
I shouldn't say no one.
Speaker 4 (22:06):
A lot of folks struggled with taking yeah, that connection
without the face to face, and so I was able
to in the community teach people how to use the systems,
the applications that allowed them to continue to communicate and
have engagement without sacrificing their health. So I used my
(22:32):
skills in IT and my skills in human resources and
human connection to build that bridge so people.
Speaker 5 (22:40):
Can continue to work. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
I was one of those people. I was not comfortable
with the online platform during the time. I was not
I was so used to just you know, the person
to person. I struggled with that, but you know, eventually,
you know, you you you figure it out. Yeah, we
figured it out. But yeah, I can really see how
(23:07):
that's important that you know the IT and the HR
piece of it. So We're gonna talk a little bit
about WVII. It's the tax okay, So let's talk about
your incredible work with WVII, where you serve as the
vice president for the Atlanta chapter. What drew you to
w to the organization and what kind of impact are
(23:29):
you creating through that platform. Yes, so, WVII was one
of the first organizations.
Speaker 4 (23:38):
That I featured on my VSO presentation at Microsoft. So
one of the ways that I would input data into
the system was to go online and find veteran service
organizations and share that the community. At Microsoft, we worked
(23:58):
through Venevity, and so I was looking at veteran service
organizations and I didn't see any that were specifically for
women struggling, right, And when I looked at the charter
of WVII and how they help women experiencing homelessness or
needing rep services for their children, I just thought that
(24:23):
is impact. Yeah, meeting people where they are at that
crossroads of struggle. They knew they had the capability because
they've been successful in the military. But when you take
away from structure, it's like, what do I do now?
Speaker 2 (24:39):
Yes, yes, it's such a real thing, you know, but
you know what I find because we're in that we're
a concept in that figure it out, figure it out,
figure it out mode. We don't reach out for help, right,
And that's why these organizations are important, and that's why
(25:02):
it because they provide that they fill that gap for us.
But sometimes we don't. We don't just step out to
go find it. We have to do that, and I
mean it's something we do have to do. We're so
used to everything being available for us that we you know,
we're just like, well, where is it. It's not here.
You know, they're not coming. You have to go get it.
(25:23):
You have to go.
Speaker 5 (25:26):
You have to go get it. That's the thing.
Speaker 4 (25:29):
It's not I have to tell my command or I
have to go to the ACS or the army, the
community service office and find out which person can help me.
Speaker 5 (25:40):
No mind it. Oh yeah. So the other thing that
I love about w b I is.
Speaker 4 (25:52):
The community that it creates across the country and not
just in that one where you have the ability to
reach out and touch someone that's similar to you in
that way. Having been in the military and the fun
times that we have.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
Was huge in the military, Yes, yes.
Speaker 4 (26:22):
And I will say I also have to acknowledge our
president and CEO is open to expanding beyond the original
plan for the founding of the organization, right, So she's
forward thinking, and so the organization evolves.
Speaker 5 (26:44):
And I love that.
Speaker 4 (26:45):
Sometimes organizations stagnate, Yeah, and then they no longer serve
the needs of their members because they're serving a past need.
Speaker 5 (26:58):
Yeah, So I love w I.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
We forget the s because as.
Speaker 5 (27:05):
A foundation now yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
All right, Yeah, what do you believe are the biggest
challenges women veterans still face today, both in career and community,
and how do you think we can dismantle those barriers?
Speaker 4 (27:29):
So the first thing that comes to mind for me,
women veterans had to endure a lot during their tenure
in the service, attempting to stand out in a positive
way to take people's minds off of what they deemed
(27:50):
as negative. So, as a woman veteran, I have had
to help several women stop reliving the trauma and stop
having negative self talk. Oftentimes, when you are trying to
(28:13):
move from something you're really comfortable and strong in into
something that may be new, feel less than yes. Yes,
But in reality, the fact that you're even trying something new,
when giving yourself the chance to do something that is
future proof.
Speaker 5 (28:34):
Means that you're more than.
Speaker 4 (28:37):
Many who just are comfortable with staying where they are
and doing bare minimum or what someone tells them they're
able to do.
Speaker 5 (28:45):
So I feel like the trauma piece, which so many
women veterans aren't still dealing with unpacking that and seeing
someone a professional. And then the other piece is realizing
that you are not defined by what the military told
you you were.
Speaker 2 (29:06):
Yeah, that part.
Speaker 5 (29:09):
Recognizing the significance of all of you, and I know
that you're so unapologetic about that, Renee.
Speaker 4 (29:17):
I mean, it's amazing to me how so many women
fear looking beautiful right because of some of the trauma
that they experience, and not understanding that when you look great.
Speaker 5 (29:35):
You feel great. Great.
Speaker 3 (29:38):
Yeah it's true. Yeah, but you know.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
To your point, you know, if I understand exactly what
you're talking about, because it is a mindset shift, it's
you know, especially for someone like me. I started out
as eighteen, so that's my entire life. The military was
my mom, my dad, system or brother. So you know,
I've really had to really shift from that place. And
(30:07):
that's one of the reasons I'm doing what I'm doing,
because yes, we are carrying gloves. You know, we do
not look like what we've been through, don't you know.
And I this is why I do this, like the podcast,
to bring on women like you to yes, own all
(30:28):
of that, because it is part of.
Speaker 5 (30:30):
Who you are.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
But you can be more. You can do more. You
can tap into things that's like sitting just dormant.
Speaker 5 (30:39):
Pull it out.
Speaker 2 (30:40):
You know, you're more than your mos, you know, more
than any uniform. Look look how many things you did already.
You know you you've pivoted and pivoted, and that's that's
I love that, you know, keep going until you find
that thing that's just okay, this is it. This is
where I want to be. So this is part of
a reason I do this, and I bring on guests
(31:03):
just to really empower others. Someone maybe sitting there thinking
I can't do this, or you know, who I am
doesn't matter, or you know, I just can't get out
of this rut, you know, But we share our stories.
We share you know, I went through a moment when
I got out the military, you know, and I went
(31:24):
through some of those I was in some of those
places where I thought, you know, nobody's gonna understand I'm
just you know, what I did doesn't make sense. How
I'm feeling doesn't make sense because the way everyone sees me. Right,
So that's also that makes you feel insecure. It really,
you know, diminishes your confidence because you're like, I can't
(31:46):
show up week, Like I can't show up week. I
was a captain, you're not now. So I love that
you you spoke to that. I do. I love that
you spoke to that. And this is what, like I said,
(32:07):
this is what it's all about, just putting it out
there so people know. Look, you can still do more.
And you know, we take care of We take care
of ourselves when we need it. We need rest our,
body needs to heal, you know, we get to support,
we need mental health support, all of that it's available.
And then you do more. Then you just go be more,
(32:29):
do more? Right, Yes, so you're you're a mentor, a mom,
a veteran, a leader. That's a lot I had to wear.
So how do you stay grounded and continue showing up
for yourself and pouring into others like you're doing now?
Speaker 5 (32:50):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (32:51):
Faith, Yes, I think.
Speaker 5 (32:59):
They listen.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
If I don't know nothing else, I know that I
am a child of God and he don't play.
Speaker 5 (33:07):
About his children.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
And I know that I'm here for a reason, and
it is shown to me.
Speaker 4 (33:18):
I lean into what comes to me. So when I
pray at night, I ask for guidance. I pray for gratitude,
just to be thankful, you know, and to be in
the spaces where I am meant to be and connected
to other people who have a heart forgiving and have
(33:44):
a mind for movement. And so I think two things,
my faith and then my fortitude that was forged in
fire right. So, coming into the military as a private
(34:04):
nothing thirty years old with two kids and a mom
who's you know, not able to care for herself, I
knew that I had to be as strong as I
possibly could to make the best life for them. And
knowing that I had to, and understanding that I had
(34:24):
been given the gift to lead to mare and to
create this experience and this presence that gave other people confidence,
I didn't really feel like I had a choice but
to do what I was brought here to.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
Yeah, you know, we're always right where we're supposed to be.
You know, we may not understand how we got there,
what we're supposed to be there, wherever there is so
so when you think about it, the next generation of
women leaders, especially those coming out of the military, what
(35:05):
advice would you give them about stepping into rooms with
confidence and authenticity? Like what like? How would you like
guide them through that? I'll start by saying, there is.
Speaker 4 (35:25):
Nothing that you cannot do with the right preparation, the
right mindset, and the right spirit. Yes, if you want
to be present in a meaningful and a powerful way,
(35:47):
do that. Yeah, into the room like you already own it. Yeah,
give yourself grace and don't worry about making minor mistakes
because if you prepare, it will be minor and most
people won't even notice.
Speaker 5 (36:07):
The other thing that I'll say, yeah, I mean because
we're all human.
Speaker 4 (36:12):
Yes, every day, every day? Okay, understand who you are.
I do teach a class on brand, and what we
realized in teaching the brand class was that once you
figure out who you are, then you just learn.
Speaker 5 (36:34):
How to leverage it.
Speaker 4 (36:36):
Yes, Yeah, and oftentimes it's showing up consistently being yourself,
which is much easier to do when you're being authentic.
Speaker 5 (36:46):
Right, be yourself.
Speaker 4 (36:48):
And then if there's something you have an interest in,
a curiosity about, dig deep into it. Yeah, but one
thing at a time.
Speaker 5 (37:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (37:02):
In my youth, in my twenties, I tried to do
everything all at the same time, multitasking.
Speaker 5 (37:06):
I was here, there, and everywhere and nowhere at the same.
Speaker 4 (37:10):
Time, right right, that part, that part, so my brand
wasn't here.
Speaker 5 (37:17):
I didn't even know what my brand was at all.
Get your clarity and command.
Speaker 4 (37:30):
Respect, but also give it, yeah, to be respectable and respectful.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
Yeah, but ultimately shine.
Speaker 5 (37:42):
Listen, you are.
Speaker 2 (37:44):
Here for a reason.
Speaker 5 (37:46):
The world needs whatever you.
Speaker 2 (37:49):
Have you Yeah, yeah, good, Yeah, you know I have to.
I have to speak on what you just said because
you know, for a long time, even when I was
in the military, I really didn't know who I was.
I was on autopilot. I was on autopilot, and I
(38:09):
was so afraid to be me. I was so afraid
to just be who I was. I was goofy. I'm
serious at times, you know, I was just just you know,
I'm just a lot, and I didn't even want to
embrace that about myself. But it's something about getting in
your forties, you're like, you know what I do, not care.
(38:35):
It's something about that age I was so serious. But
it's also about you know, personal development too.
Speaker 3 (38:43):
You know.
Speaker 2 (38:45):
But you're right. You said something that I really do
agree with. When you really figure out, when you really
find who you are, the game changes, Everything shifts, everything shifts.
So kudos to you for saying that.
Speaker 4 (39:05):
And one thing I think I left out when we
talk about so my word for the year is presence.
Speaker 5 (39:11):
Right. Oh, it's nice. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
I like that.
Speaker 5 (39:17):
It's so.
Speaker 2 (39:20):
Simple but powerful because in order for me to have
the presence that I want, I have to be clear
on what that is, and I have to edit to
remove all the things that stopped me from having that presence.
Speaker 5 (39:42):
Yeah, and then in order to progress. Right. So I.
Speaker 4 (39:49):
Pointed this phrase at the end of my last brand
session where we were talking about finding opportunity and having progress,
and it really stayed with me. And it's about understanding
what the opportunity means to you and then moving forward.
So I say progress. The word is a noun and
(40:13):
a verb, So moving forward, yeah.
Speaker 5 (40:18):
Is progressed.
Speaker 4 (40:19):
But sometimes standing still is too, especially if you're here,
there and everywhere, being and still and have.
Speaker 5 (40:33):
Is progress.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
That is so beautiful. I love that. I love that
it is. Oh my goodness. So you talk a lot
about growth and showing up fully. What's one personal mindset
shift that changed everything for you?
Speaker 5 (40:58):
Ooh uh.
Speaker 4 (41:01):
I think realizing that I didn't have to prove that
I belonged in the room, that I should have my space.
Speaker 2 (41:10):
Once I realized I didn't want to prove anything anymore,
I could just do me.
Speaker 5 (41:16):
And it's still amazing.
Speaker 2 (41:19):
Yes, yes, yes, you do have a presence still, collect
like you have this light. I mean that last event
we were at, I walked in and I just turned around.
I was like, God, you know, but you know I
(41:40):
see you. You know you're seen because you do bring
your light with you. So I love that. I love
what you said. We don't have to prove anything anymore.
If we're sitting in our in who we are, we
don't have to prove anything. And my thing is if
you're in the room, that means you're supposed to be there. Yes,
(42:01):
in there, You're supposed to be there because nothing happens
by coincidence. So I'm going to ask you this last question.
What does living unapologetically beyond the uniform means to you?
And I feel like you're already doing it.
Speaker 4 (42:21):
Living unapologetically beyond the uniform means abundance, living in an abundance,
just out loud.
Speaker 5 (42:34):
You're not limited as to what you're doing.
Speaker 2 (42:36):
Wear my hair down. I can laugh out loud with
my mouth as why as it used to be. I
can put on my lashes if I want to. Yes,
I can't sleep in and get up at six o'clock
in the morning to be information by six thirty, even if.
Speaker 3 (42:55):
I'm standing in front, living in.
Speaker 2 (42:59):
The way that I want to live in, giving yeah
and being open to receiving. Yes, authenticity, bravery.
Speaker 5 (43:13):
Just joy.
Speaker 2 (43:17):
I love enough joy, celebration in the world. We need
to celebrate more. We do need to celebrate more. We
don't do nothing of that part of day. But seriously,
you know we yeah, we really don't celebrate ourselves anymore.
We work ourselves to death, some of us, you know.
But we're shifting that, you know, We're with these practices
(43:40):
that you talked about. But thank you so much for sharing.
Speaker 5 (43:45):
Ah.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
You you had such power in the conversation, so grounded
and inspiring. I love it. Your leadership, your service both
in and out of the uniform, and you're on wavering
dedication to just creating a safe space for people to
thrive is amazing. So tell our listeners where they can,
(44:10):
how they can connect with you, where they can find you,
and just you know, just be in your space, be
where you are.
Speaker 4 (44:18):
Yes, So I am on LinkedIn and just type in
my name collect Cottmon and also find me on Instagram.
VA two Ga is my Instagram and I'm also on Facebook.
And if you're ever in the A or Atlanta, as
you know, folcusing on.
Speaker 2 (44:40):
Hit me up. All right, So, if this episode moved you,
challenged you, or reminded you of your own power, go
ahead and share it with a fellow veteran, or a
leader in your circle, or.
Speaker 3 (44:58):
Someone you you know who you feel.
Speaker 2 (45:01):
May need a little reminder that they belong in every
room that they walk into. Connect the collect and just
you know, definitely check out the WVIIF Women's Veteran Interactive
Foundation and the incredible work being done by the Atlanta chapter.
Remember new episodes of Living Unapologetically Beyond Uniform here's every
(45:26):
Friday at eleven am Eastern Standard Time, where by Apple Podcasts, iHeartRadio,
Amazon Music Podcast, Attic and right here on YouTube. So
until next time, keep leading, keep shining, and keep living unapologetically.
Speaker 1 (45:49):
This has been Living Unapologetically Beyond the Uniform. With your host,
Renee Jones Hutson. We hope you found inspiration and valuable
insights in today's episode. Remember your journey of redefining, rediscovering,
and reaffirming your life post military is unique and powerful.
Stay connected with us for more stories, advice and support.
(46:13):
Until next time, Stay strong and stay empowered. Listen Fridays
eleven a m. Eastern on the Bold Brave TV Network,
powered by B two Studios
Are you a transitioning military or veteran woman looking for support, guidance,
and inspiration. You've come to the right place. Welcome to
Living Unapologetically Beyond the Uniform with your host, Renee Jones Hudson.
Renee brings powerful stories, practical advice, and expert insights to
help you redefine, rediscover, and reaffirm your life after military service,
(00:54):
whether navigating a career change, seeking personal growth, or focusing
on your well being. We're here to would empower you
every step of the way. So welcome the host of
Living Unapologetically Beyond the Uniform, Renee Jones Hudson. Let's embark
on this journey together.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Hello, and welcome back to another episode of Living Unapologetically
Beyond the Uniform. I'm your host, Renee Jones Hutson, and
I'm glad you're tuning in today. We have some technical difficulties,
but we figured it out and now we're here. So
I know I say this often, but this week's guest
(01:38):
she is truly someone you want to lean in and
learn from. I am so honored to sit down with
a powerhouse decorated veteran, strategic leader and community advocate whose
mission goes far beyond the boardroom. My guest today is
Miss Collette Kopman. She is a retired Army combat officer,
(02:02):
a senior strategist and diversity and inclusion manager at Tech Systems,
and the vice president of the Atlanta Chapter of the
Women's Interactive Women's Veterans Interactive Foundation. She's held key leadership
roles at companies like Microsoft, led enterprise programs across it
HR and operations, and she holds impressive degrees and certifications.
(02:28):
But what sets her apart is her heart. She pours
into people through advocacy, mentorship, and she has a passion
for building inclusive spaces that fosters real belonging. Today, we're
going to talk about what it means to lead beyond
the uniform.
Speaker 3 (02:45):
We're going to.
Speaker 2 (02:45):
Also tap into navigating the corporate world without losing your
voice and how to use your influence to uplift others,
especially women veterans. So collect welcome to the show. I
am so excited for this conversation. Hi, I'm excited to
be here. Thanks for having me. Thank you so much
(03:08):
for joining. I appreciate you. Let's start, you know, from
the beginning, where did it all begin? Tell us a
little bit about your background, what led you to join
the military, and what was that experience like for you.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
Sure, so, I am how.
Speaker 5 (03:29):
Do I start? I was.
Speaker 4 (03:33):
Twenty eight years old working at the Internal Revenue Service,
and I realized that I was going nowhere fast right
in spite of my ambition. I was just caught in
that golden handcuffed of the government service, and I thought,
how can I do something different? So I went to
(03:55):
school at night to learn computer networking and.
Speaker 5 (04:00):
Went to work at Honeywell.
Speaker 4 (04:03):
But then they the part of Honeywell that I worked
at that bought out by ge and at the time
they were really leaning into that lean six sigma where
you do more with less and I just feed. So
one of my leaders was a lieutenant in the army,
and she said, you would make a wonderful soldier and
(04:25):
probably even better officer. You ever thought about going on
the military, and I cringed. Of course, I was like, no,
I'm almost thirty years old, mom of two kids, and
I don't think that's going to work.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
She said, Okay, you try it, and not even six
months later I was enlisting and going to boot camp. Wow,
how was that for you?
Speaker 3 (04:50):
Though?
Speaker 2 (04:50):
Because you know, most of my guests we've started at eighteen,
so you know, and I didn't even know that about you.
So how was that coming? And like, you know, already adult,
you had children already and everything. Almost thirty, you said,
how was that experience?
Speaker 4 (05:09):
Yeah, So by the time I finished boot camp, I
was thirty.
Speaker 5 (05:15):
It was twenty two thousand and one, so it was tough.
Speaker 4 (05:21):
I was about two hundred and twenty pounds, two kids,
mom at home watching after them, and in boot camp
I ended up having two kids, if you will. The
drill sergeants hooked one of the folks that was struggling
onto my back and the other one was my bunk.
Speaker 5 (05:41):
Major was seventeen.
Speaker 3 (05:44):
Wow. So it was.
Speaker 5 (05:46):
Being a mom in basic.
Speaker 2 (05:50):
Wow. Wow, being a mom for real, and being a
mom to the kids in racing.
Speaker 5 (05:57):
Yes, of people's chosen.
Speaker 2 (05:59):
Yeah, yes, So transitional transition from the military can be
a real identity shift. What did your transition to civilian
life look like for you? Was it what you expected
or did you navigate some of some unexpected pivots? And
then you know, with you going in at an older age,
you've already experienced a civilian world prior to joining the service,
(06:22):
So I'm curious to learn how you know the comparison
between the two.
Speaker 4 (06:31):
So I'll tell you it's interesting because the expectations are
set for you in the military that this is it, right,
the military is everything, and so the expectation is to
be overwhelmed and confused, and.
Speaker 5 (06:49):
I felt a little bit of that.
Speaker 4 (06:51):
But to your point, I'd already been in civilian life before,
but this time I was going in as a leader,
and so so I took my leadership from the military
and the experience that I had, building connections, understanding the
landscape going in, and then just imparting my spirit into
(07:15):
what I was doing. So I felt initially concerned, just
based on what I'd been told to expect, and then
the Headhunters came out nowhere with all these different opportunities
than I was confused.
Speaker 5 (07:35):
I got right like, what is all this okay?
Speaker 2 (07:43):
I said, you know what, I've always been athletic, and
I love clothes and attired pats and earrings and things
like that.
Speaker 4 (07:54):
So, in honor of my dad, who I lost two
years before I got it got restless soul, I said,
you know what, I'm going to go work for fanatics.
They sell apparel. They are focused on sports and memorabilia.
I get to walk in the door making enough to
(08:14):
stay hole.
Speaker 5 (08:16):
Yeah, and I.
Speaker 4 (08:17):
Jumped right onto the opportunity to be an HRM in
corporate at a company that I admired.
Speaker 2 (08:25):
Yeah. You know What's it's interesting how we always fall
back to that one thing that we're so good at
that and that's familiar to us, you know, it's what
gets us to It's almost like it's just a stepping
stone to where we need to be. We just need
to hold space right now in that place till we
kind of figure out who we're trying to get to.
(08:47):
So I love exactly. So looking at the work you're
doing now in the corporate space and community advocacy, what
is your why today? What fuels your past?
Speaker 5 (09:03):
Yeah? So many things.
Speaker 4 (09:07):
After my first job out of the military, I realized
I wanted to feel more than just good at my job, right.
Speaker 5 (09:17):
I wanted to feel like I.
Speaker 4 (09:19):
Was having impact and the purpose that I was given
by God and the reason for me being here needed
to be fulfilled. So I left that job and went
to a nonprofit Higher Heroes, and it actually brought me
to where I lived. Yeah, So that was my first
(09:44):
foray into living a purpose build life, and I realized
fairly quickly that it was so limited in the role
itself as a career counselor that I wanted to do more.
I was also working with a gentleman that I had met,
and he was having some health issues and had taken
(10:07):
on the responsibility of a young sibling. He and I
are both in our fifties and his sibling was in
elementary school. So I said, you know what, I'm not
loving what I'm doing in terms of the impact I
expected it to have, and I really want to help
nurture this young woman and help him. So I left
(10:30):
and went into substitute teaching and fell in love with
the kiddos and seeing the shine through their pieces.
Speaker 5 (10:40):
He had a discovery, right.
Speaker 2 (10:44):
I just love how you pivot and pivot and pivot.
That's what I say. Just you know, keep trying until
you find that thing that really like holds you in
that space, you know. So I love that.
Speaker 3 (10:57):
So yeah, no, I was just gonna tell you what
because okay, I was.
Speaker 2 (11:05):
I was subbing and the kids were just lighting up
and one of the things that I love to share
with them was coding, and you know how they could
use different types of it because I did that in
the military. And funny enough, Yeah, one of the gentlemen
that came to see what we were doing at the
(11:26):
middle school was from Microsoft, and he and I had
worked together in Jacksonville when I was at Fanatics and
he said, you know what I need somebody in my
community department. Is that something you'd be interested in? I
was like, are you kidding me? Microsoft? Absolutely? Yeah, yeah,
(11:51):
And that leads me to this next question that I
was gonna ask. So, you've held leadership roles like in
organizations like mysolt and now tech Systems, right, and you're
leading efforts and diversity, equity, inclusion. And I had to
figure out what the bee was belonging forgive me, So,
(12:15):
what does real belonging look like to you? And what's
still missing in today's corporate culture.
Speaker 5 (12:24):
Yes, that's a powerful question.
Speaker 4 (12:28):
And you mentioned you had to think about what does
the bee stand for? And so long it was not
part of the right, right, but it really is the
thing that makes us want to help one another. So
often you think about the anti bullying movement and work
(12:49):
building and all of those components of making people feel
like they're a part of something significant so that they
want to do more. Or I saw a quote that said,
the people that you care for do the work that
you give them with care. Yeah, and so to me,
(13:12):
I feel like a lot of times that's what's missing
in the organizations is that we focus so much on
the bottom line, hitting those metrics, making the sausage right, No,
you don't so much for it, the seasoning, the packaging it,
(13:34):
I mean so good.
Speaker 2 (13:37):
Yeah, yes, that's a good part, a good part.
Speaker 4 (13:42):
But that's of belonging I have missed over and over again.
Even in the military, you'd see those couple folks sitting
off to the side and you think they don't get part.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
Of well they do, and they just are not being
welcomed in on those strengths that they have. So I
think sometimes.
Speaker 4 (14:05):
What's missing and belonging is that people don't recognize the
significance of the feeling that's yeah, well part of as
opposed to just being one of the cogs in the machine.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
You know, that's what I love about US military, US veterans.
It's just crazy, it's just I don't know, you know,
we don't know how to explain that connection. Like I
don't like even you and I met at Mission Continues
and just but it was all you know, all of
(14:41):
us veterans, all of us women, and we just just
started talking like we knew each other. We were all
in the same unit, like we serve this role. But
that's what I love about our community, you know, it's
just that that common that common experience that we have,
you know, that just pulls us. We can start talking
about one thing and we all just go down this
(15:03):
rabbit hole about you know, a whole bunch of stuff.
So I hours, I get that belonging piece and like
I said, you know, at first before I didn't, you know,
I didn't recognize what that was. And I was like, oh,
that makes so much sense. It does make sense. And
you really do you really? Do you really live that.
(15:25):
I can speak to that, especially with you know, with
us doing some projects together. So I I, you're walking
the talk or is it you're talking?
Speaker 3 (15:36):
Yeah, you're walking the talk.
Speaker 5 (15:40):
I talk.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Oh no, don't even give me the lie about the songs. Now, okay,
So what are some of the common misconceptions that you
encounter when it comes to DEIB and how do you
challenge those outdated mindsets and inspire authentic change.
Speaker 5 (16:09):
So this is the thing.
Speaker 4 (16:13):
When we oversimplify and sometimes we put acronyms on things,
they take on a different life than the intent, and
sometimes it opens the door for that intent to be
misinterpreted or misused. And I believe what's happened with the
(16:37):
concept is that people have been afraid of the change
that was happening and let that fear take over. One
thing that I know for sure is that everyone wants
(16:58):
to thrive, Everyone wants to be part of right. Inclusion
is all about us coming together and being the best
that we can together. And when it gets misconstrued, I say,
let's go back to the basics. Let's get away from
(17:20):
the actrom let's pull it up. We're talking about humanity.
We're talking about yeah, just getting the best you can
out of yourself and other people's energy.
Speaker 5 (17:39):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (17:39):
Move.
Speaker 4 (17:39):
You know those moments when you feel like, oh man,
I don't feel like it today.
Speaker 2 (17:45):
Yeah, that's why I loves Yeah. Yeah, that's why you
like you have always every time I see you, I'm like, yes,
it's today, probably wired. I get wired.
Speaker 5 (18:06):
Yes, No, that's.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
I do believe diversity too. No, I was just gonna
say I do believe you know, once I understood it
that there is power and proximity and there it's and
you literally have to find your tribe because sometimes that's
all I need. I need to get plugged in, I
get I need to get juiced up, and then when
I get around light minded people, you know, I'm like, yeah,
(18:33):
thank you. You know, so I just get the energy
verse that I need and I'm good.
Speaker 3 (18:39):
That's it and we have a good time. Right, So
I think we do.
Speaker 4 (18:45):
To answer your question, I guess I'll go back to
people talking about inclusion and diversity. It really is all
about being human, appreciating that we cannot do it all
alone and that we can help to fill each other's
gaps and rise the tide together.
Speaker 5 (19:06):
Right.
Speaker 4 (19:07):
Really, all we're talking about here, it's just operationalized in
a concept that can be used in a business setting.
The outcomes I think made some folks fearful because it
gave them a little bit of push. Now that everyone
(19:28):
is getting an opportunity, it means there's more competition.
Speaker 5 (19:35):
Yeah, it also means you can't.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
Hide, and so that causes a little heartburn. But the
beauty is that challenge is what makes us so much better. Yeah,
and all the voices. It opens the aperture so we
don't miss things. I think about the fitbits. When I
(20:01):
first got my fitbit, it didn't work, probably ten years ago.
They weren't designed with people with darker skin in mind.
Oh wow, And.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
So they didn't work with the water when you go
to the water, try to turn it on.
Speaker 4 (20:18):
They weren't designed with darker skin in mind, and so
they didn't recognize the hand.
Speaker 5 (20:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (20:27):
And so I realized generative AI needs to have voices
and perspectives of different backgrounds, different humans to support taking
care of other humans.
Speaker 5 (20:42):
Because really that's all we do in business.
Speaker 4 (20:44):
Sales is all about a solution to a p and
you buy from who you love or who you feel comfortable.
Speaker 2 (20:52):
Right right, More people and you have more success.
Speaker 5 (20:58):
Yeah, you just.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
Edge it kidding me about the fitbit though, that was
like my whole moment right there.
Speaker 5 (21:04):
I was like, oh I did not know that.
Speaker 2 (21:07):
Wow. Okay, So with your you have a strong background
in AI, I mean in it and hr what is
a rare but powerful Well I actually put it like,
it's how has that unique skills to help you lead
and build system that support people.
Speaker 4 (21:27):
Yes, so interestingly, I didn't know that there were so
few people that had those two backgrounds, and coming into
an IT company, I wanted to be involved in the community,
but I also wanted to lean into the now and
(21:49):
on the bleeding edge of it. And so when the
pandemic hit and there was difficulty with face to face,
no one knew how to continue to have their businesses flowing.
Speaker 5 (22:04):
I shouldn't say no one.
Speaker 4 (22:06):
A lot of folks struggled with taking yeah, that connection
without the face to face, and so I was able
to in the community teach people how to use the systems,
the applications that allowed them to continue to communicate and
have engagement without sacrificing their health. So I used my
(22:32):
skills in IT and my skills in human resources and
human connection to build that bridge so people.
Speaker 5 (22:40):
Can continue to work. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
I was one of those people. I was not comfortable
with the online platform during the time. I was not
I was so used to just you know, the person
to person. I struggled with that, but you know, eventually,
you know, you you you figure it out. Yeah, we
figured it out. But yeah, I can really see how
(23:07):
that's important that you know the IT and the HR
piece of it. So We're gonna talk a little bit
about WVII. It's the tax okay, So let's talk about
your incredible work with WVII, where you serve as the
vice president for the Atlanta chapter. What drew you to
w to the organization and what kind of impact are
(23:29):
you creating through that platform. Yes, so, WVII was one
of the first organizations.
Speaker 4 (23:38):
That I featured on my VSO presentation at Microsoft. So
one of the ways that I would input data into
the system was to go online and find veteran service
organizations and share that the community. At Microsoft, we worked
(23:58):
through Venevity, and so I was looking at veteran service
organizations and I didn't see any that were specifically for
women struggling, right, And when I looked at the charter
of WVII and how they help women experiencing homelessness or
needing rep services for their children, I just thought that
(24:23):
is impact. Yeah, meeting people where they are at that
crossroads of struggle. They knew they had the capability because
they've been successful in the military. But when you take
away from structure, it's like, what do I do now?
Speaker 2 (24:39):
Yes, yes, it's such a real thing, you know, but
you know what I find because we're in that we're
a concept in that figure it out, figure it out,
figure it out mode. We don't reach out for help, right,
And that's why these organizations are important, and that's why
(25:02):
it because they provide that they fill that gap for us.
But sometimes we don't. We don't just step out to
go find it. We have to do that, and I
mean it's something we do have to do. We're so
used to everything being available for us that we you know,
we're just like, well, where is it. It's not here.
You know, they're not coming. You have to go get it.
(25:23):
You have to go.
Speaker 5 (25:26):
You have to go get it. That's the thing.
Speaker 4 (25:29):
It's not I have to tell my command or I
have to go to the ACS or the army, the
community service office and find out which person can help me.
Speaker 5 (25:40):
No mind it. Oh yeah. So the other thing that
I love about w b I is.
Speaker 4 (25:52):
The community that it creates across the country and not
just in that one where you have the ability to
reach out and touch someone that's similar to you in
that way. Having been in the military and the fun
times that we have.
Speaker 2 (26:16):
Was huge in the military, Yes, yes.
Speaker 4 (26:22):
And I will say I also have to acknowledge our
president and CEO is open to expanding beyond the original
plan for the founding of the organization, right, So she's
forward thinking, and so the organization evolves.
Speaker 5 (26:44):
And I love that.
Speaker 4 (26:45):
Sometimes organizations stagnate, Yeah, and then they no longer serve
the needs of their members because they're serving a past need.
Speaker 5 (26:58):
Yeah, So I love w I.
Speaker 2 (27:03):
We forget the s because as.
Speaker 5 (27:05):
A foundation now yeah, absolutely.
Speaker 2 (27:12):
All right, Yeah, what do you believe are the biggest
challenges women veterans still face today, both in career and community,
and how do you think we can dismantle those barriers?
Speaker 4 (27:29):
So the first thing that comes to mind for me,
women veterans had to endure a lot during their tenure
in the service, attempting to stand out in a positive
way to take people's minds off of what they deemed
(27:50):
as negative. So, as a woman veteran, I have had
to help several women stop reliving the trauma and stop
having negative self talk. Oftentimes, when you are trying to
(28:13):
move from something you're really comfortable and strong in into
something that may be new, feel less than yes. Yes,
But in reality, the fact that you're even trying something new,
when giving yourself the chance to do something that is
future proof.
Speaker 5 (28:34):
Means that you're more than.
Speaker 4 (28:37):
Many who just are comfortable with staying where they are
and doing bare minimum or what someone tells them they're
able to do.
Speaker 5 (28:45):
So I feel like the trauma piece, which so many
women veterans aren't still dealing with unpacking that and seeing
someone a professional. And then the other piece is realizing
that you are not defined by what the military told
you you were.
Speaker 2 (29:06):
Yeah, that part.
Speaker 5 (29:09):
Recognizing the significance of all of you, and I know
that you're so unapologetic about that, Renee.
Speaker 4 (29:17):
I mean, it's amazing to me how so many women
fear looking beautiful right because of some of the trauma
that they experience, and not understanding that when you look great.
Speaker 5 (29:35):
You feel great. Great.
Speaker 3 (29:38):
Yeah it's true. Yeah, but you know.
Speaker 2 (29:45):
To your point, you know, if I understand exactly what
you're talking about, because it is a mindset shift, it's
you know, especially for someone like me. I started out
as eighteen, so that's my entire life. The military was
my mom, my dad, system or brother. So you know,
I've really had to really shift from that place. And
(30:07):
that's one of the reasons I'm doing what I'm doing,
because yes, we are carrying gloves. You know, we do
not look like what we've been through, don't you know.
And I this is why I do this, like the podcast,
to bring on women like you to yes, own all
(30:28):
of that, because it is part of.
Speaker 5 (30:30):
Who you are.
Speaker 2 (30:31):
But you can be more. You can do more. You
can tap into things that's like sitting just dormant.
Speaker 5 (30:39):
Pull it out.
Speaker 2 (30:40):
You know, you're more than your mos, you know, more
than any uniform. Look look how many things you did already.
You know you you've pivoted and pivoted, and that's that's
I love that, you know, keep going until you find
that thing that's just okay, this is it. This is
where I want to be. So this is part of
a reason I do this, and I bring on guests
(31:03):
just to really empower others. Someone maybe sitting there thinking
I can't do this, or you know, who I am
doesn't matter, or you know, I just can't get out
of this rut, you know, But we share our stories.
We share you know, I went through a moment when
I got out the military, you know, and I went
(31:24):
through some of those I was in some of those
places where I thought, you know, nobody's gonna understand I'm
just you know, what I did doesn't make sense. How
I'm feeling doesn't make sense because the way everyone sees me. Right,
So that's also that makes you feel insecure. It really,
you know, diminishes your confidence because you're like, I can't
(31:46):
show up week, Like I can't show up week. I
was a captain, you're not now. So I love that
you you spoke to that. I do. I love that
you spoke to that. And this is what, like I said,
(32:07):
this is what it's all about, just putting it out
there so people know. Look, you can still do more.
And you know, we take care of We take care
of ourselves when we need it. We need rest our,
body needs to heal, you know, we get to support,
we need mental health support, all of that it's available.
And then you do more. Then you just go be more,
(32:29):
do more? Right, Yes, so you're you're a mentor, a mom,
a veteran, a leader. That's a lot I had to wear.
So how do you stay grounded and continue showing up
for yourself and pouring into others like you're doing now?
Speaker 5 (32:50):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (32:51):
Faith, Yes, I think.
Speaker 5 (32:59):
They listen.
Speaker 2 (33:03):
If I don't know nothing else, I know that I
am a child of God and he don't play.
Speaker 5 (33:07):
About his children.
Speaker 2 (33:12):
And I know that I'm here for a reason, and
it is shown to me.
Speaker 4 (33:18):
I lean into what comes to me. So when I
pray at night, I ask for guidance. I pray for gratitude,
just to be thankful, you know, and to be in
the spaces where I am meant to be and connected
to other people who have a heart forgiving and have
(33:44):
a mind for movement. And so I think two things,
my faith and then my fortitude that was forged in
fire right. So, coming into the military as a private
(34:04):
nothing thirty years old with two kids and a mom
who's you know, not able to care for herself, I
knew that I had to be as strong as I
possibly could to make the best life for them. And
knowing that I had to, and understanding that I had
(34:24):
been given the gift to lead to mare and to
create this experience and this presence that gave other people confidence,
I didn't really feel like I had a choice but
to do what I was brought here to.
Speaker 2 (34:44):
Yeah, you know, we're always right where we're supposed to be.
You know, we may not understand how we got there,
what we're supposed to be there, wherever there is so
so when you think about it, the next generation of
women leaders, especially those coming out of the military, what
(35:05):
advice would you give them about stepping into rooms with
confidence and authenticity? Like what like? How would you like
guide them through that? I'll start by saying, there is.
Speaker 4 (35:25):
Nothing that you cannot do with the right preparation, the
right mindset, and the right spirit. Yes, if you want
to be present in a meaningful and a powerful way,
(35:47):
do that. Yeah, into the room like you already own it. Yeah,
give yourself grace and don't worry about making minor mistakes
because if you prepare, it will be minor and most
people won't even notice.
Speaker 5 (36:07):
The other thing that I'll say, yeah, I mean because
we're all human.
Speaker 4 (36:12):
Yes, every day, every day? Okay, understand who you are.
I do teach a class on brand, and what we
realized in teaching the brand class was that once you
figure out who you are, then you just learn.
Speaker 5 (36:34):
How to leverage it.
Speaker 4 (36:36):
Yes, Yeah, and oftentimes it's showing up consistently being yourself,
which is much easier to do when you're being authentic.
Speaker 5 (36:46):
Right, be yourself.
Speaker 4 (36:48):
And then if there's something you have an interest in,
a curiosity about, dig deep into it. Yeah, but one
thing at a time.
Speaker 5 (37:00):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (37:02):
In my youth, in my twenties, I tried to do
everything all at the same time, multitasking.
Speaker 5 (37:06):
I was here, there, and everywhere and nowhere at the same.
Speaker 4 (37:10):
Time, right right, that part, that part, so my brand
wasn't here.
Speaker 5 (37:17):
I didn't even know what my brand was at all.
Get your clarity and command.
Speaker 4 (37:30):
Respect, but also give it, yeah, to be respectable and respectful.
Speaker 2 (37:37):
Yeah, but ultimately shine.
Speaker 5 (37:42):
Listen, you are.
Speaker 2 (37:44):
Here for a reason.
Speaker 5 (37:46):
The world needs whatever you.
Speaker 2 (37:49):
Have you Yeah, yeah, good, Yeah, you know I have to.
I have to speak on what you just said because
you know, for a long time, even when I was
in the military, I really didn't know who I was.
I was on autopilot. I was on autopilot, and I
(38:09):
was so afraid to be me. I was so afraid
to just be who I was. I was goofy. I'm
serious at times, you know, I was just just you know,
I'm just a lot, and I didn't even want to
embrace that about myself. But it's something about getting in
your forties, you're like, you know what I do, not care.
(38:35):
It's something about that age I was so serious. But
it's also about you know, personal development too.
Speaker 3 (38:43):
You know.
Speaker 2 (38:45):
But you're right. You said something that I really do
agree with. When you really figure out, when you really
find who you are, the game changes, Everything shifts, everything shifts.
So kudos to you for saying that.
Speaker 4 (39:05):
And one thing I think I left out when we
talk about so my word for the year is presence.
Speaker 5 (39:11):
Right. Oh, it's nice. Yeah.
Speaker 2 (39:15):
I like that.
Speaker 5 (39:17):
It's so.
Speaker 2 (39:20):
Simple but powerful because in order for me to have
the presence that I want, I have to be clear
on what that is, and I have to edit to
remove all the things that stopped me from having that presence.
Speaker 5 (39:42):
Yeah, and then in order to progress. Right. So I.
Speaker 4 (39:49):
Pointed this phrase at the end of my last brand
session where we were talking about finding opportunity and having progress,
and it really stayed with me. And it's about understanding
what the opportunity means to you and then moving forward.
So I say progress. The word is a noun and
(40:13):
a verb, So moving forward, yeah.
Speaker 5 (40:18):
Is progressed.
Speaker 4 (40:19):
But sometimes standing still is too, especially if you're here,
there and everywhere, being and still and have.
Speaker 5 (40:33):
Is progress.
Speaker 2 (40:35):
That is so beautiful. I love that. I love that
it is. Oh my goodness. So you talk a lot
about growth and showing up fully. What's one personal mindset
shift that changed everything for you?
Speaker 5 (40:58):
Ooh uh.
Speaker 4 (41:01):
I think realizing that I didn't have to prove that
I belonged in the room, that I should have my space.
Speaker 2 (41:10):
Once I realized I didn't want to prove anything anymore,
I could just do me.
Speaker 5 (41:16):
And it's still amazing.
Speaker 2 (41:19):
Yes, yes, yes, you do have a presence still, collect
like you have this light. I mean that last event
we were at, I walked in and I just turned around.
I was like, God, you know, but you know I
(41:40):
see you. You know you're seen because you do bring
your light with you. So I love that. I love
what you said. We don't have to prove anything anymore.
If we're sitting in our in who we are, we
don't have to prove anything. And my thing is if
you're in the room, that means you're supposed to be there. Yes,
(42:01):
in there, You're supposed to be there because nothing happens
by coincidence. So I'm going to ask you this last question.
What does living unapologetically beyond the uniform means to you?
And I feel like you're already doing it.
Speaker 4 (42:21):
Living unapologetically beyond the uniform means abundance, living in an abundance,
just out loud.
Speaker 5 (42:34):
You're not limited as to what you're doing.
Speaker 2 (42:36):
Wear my hair down. I can laugh out loud with
my mouth as why as it used to be. I
can put on my lashes if I want to. Yes,
I can't sleep in and get up at six o'clock
in the morning to be information by six thirty, even if.
Speaker 3 (42:55):
I'm standing in front, living in.
Speaker 2 (42:59):
The way that I want to live in, giving yeah
and being open to receiving. Yes, authenticity, bravery.
Speaker 5 (43:13):
Just joy.
Speaker 2 (43:17):
I love enough joy, celebration in the world. We need
to celebrate more. We do need to celebrate more. We
don't do nothing of that part of day. But seriously,
you know we yeah, we really don't celebrate ourselves anymore.
We work ourselves to death, some of us, you know.
But we're shifting that, you know, We're with these practices
(43:40):
that you talked about. But thank you so much for sharing.
Speaker 5 (43:45):
Ah.
Speaker 2 (43:46):
You you had such power in the conversation, so grounded
and inspiring. I love it. Your leadership, your service both
in and out of the uniform, and you're on wavering
dedication to just creating a safe space for people to
thrive is amazing. So tell our listeners where they can,
(44:10):
how they can connect with you, where they can find you,
and just you know, just be in your space, be
where you are.
Speaker 4 (44:18):
Yes, So I am on LinkedIn and just type in
my name collect Cottmon and also find me on Instagram.
VA two Ga is my Instagram and I'm also on Facebook.
And if you're ever in the A or Atlanta, as
you know, folcusing on.
Speaker 2 (44:40):
Hit me up. All right, So, if this episode moved you,
challenged you, or reminded you of your own power, go
ahead and share it with a fellow veteran, or a
leader in your circle, or.
Speaker 3 (44:58):
Someone you you know who you feel.
Speaker 2 (45:01):
May need a little reminder that they belong in every
room that they walk into. Connect the collect and just
you know, definitely check out the WVIIF Women's Veteran Interactive
Foundation and the incredible work being done by the Atlanta chapter.
Remember new episodes of Living Unapologetically Beyond Uniform here's every
(45:26):
Friday at eleven am Eastern Standard Time, where by Apple Podcasts, iHeartRadio,
Amazon Music Podcast, Attic and right here on YouTube. So
until next time, keep leading, keep shining, and keep living unapologetically.
Speaker 1 (45:49):
This has been Living Unapologetically Beyond the Uniform. With your host,
Renee Jones Hutson. We hope you found inspiration and valuable
insights in today's episode. Remember your journey of redefining, rediscovering,
and reaffirming your life post military is unique and powerful.
Stay connected with us for more stories, advice and support.
(46:13):
Until next time, Stay strong and stay empowered. Listen Fridays
eleven a m. Eastern on the Bold Brave TV Network,
powered by B two Studios
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