942. The ASMR Zen School of English ☁️🧘 Learn English and Relax

Improve your English and reduce stress with this unique ASMR-style episode ☁️ 🧘. Join me for a relaxing, meditative journey featuring calm background music, softly spoken English, vocabulary for peace and tranquillity, some grammar practice, and gentle humour. Designed to help you learn English naturally while calming your mind, this episode is ideal for listening in bed, during quiet study, or or on a peaceful walk. Includes ambient music by my brother Jim Thompson. ASMR English, learn English while relaxing, calming English podcast, mindfulness, ESL listening practice with humour. Episode transcript available. 📄 Get the PDF transcript 👉 https://teacherluke.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/2025/06/942.-The-ASMR-Zen-School-of-English-TRANSCRIPT.pdf🔗 Episode page on my website 👉 https://teacherluke.co.uk/2025/06/30/942-the-asmr-zen-school-of-english-learn-english-and-relax/🎧 "Ambient Anthology" by Jim Thompson 👉 https://jimthompson.bandcamp.com/album/ambient-anthology Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
A Cast recommends podcasts we love.

Speaker 2 (00:03):
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(00:26):
com or wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 1 (00:29):
A cast is home to the world's best podcasts, including
the David McWilliams podcast I'm Grandmam and the one you're
listening to right now.

Speaker 3 (00:46):
You're listening to Luke's English podcast. For more information, visit
Teach You Luke dot co dot uk.

Speaker 4 (01:17):
Hello listeners, this episode is slightly different to usual. It's
a kind of calming zen meditation episode, and you can
tell because of the atmospheric background music and my general
tone of voice. I'm attempting to speak in a calm,
relaxing way. Maybe this is the kind of voice that

(01:38):
you would hear on a kind of relaxation meditation CD
that you bought a few years ago when people used
to buy CDs maybe you went into one of those
New Age shops somewhere, you know, the kind of shop

(01:59):
that sells candles and incense and little stones that you
can put on your belly which are supposed to make
you relaxed. And they also had some CDs. Yeah, so
maybe you bought one and you listen to it once

(02:22):
and never used it again. Or maybe this is the
sort of voice that you would hear.

Speaker 5 (02:27):
In one of those.

Speaker 4 (02:29):
Relaxation and meditation apps that you might have downloaded on
your phone, but one of the free ones, you know,
one that didn't cost any money.

Speaker 5 (02:38):
But anyway, I.

Speaker 4 (02:39):
Expect you feel more relaxed already, just simply by listening
to the sound of my voice. But don't fall asleep
just yet, because I've got some very nice things to
tell you in this episode. This is the asmr Zen
School of English, and as well as these calming vibes,

(03:02):
there will also be some English teaching and a bit
of humor during the episode. This is all supposed to
give you something very peaceful and relaxing to listen to
in English. I've designed this episode to lull you into
a calm Zen like, meditative, trance like state to help

(03:26):
rid you of stress or bad vibes in order to
help you learn English in the process. There are also
some grammar lessons involved in this too, because I thought
it might help you either learn English or perhaps just
get a really good night's sleep. So either your English

(03:46):
will improve or you'll just have a really good rest,
or maybe a bit of both. In any case, it
should be beneficial. This episode is best enjoyed with headphones
on in a comfortable place like a nice chair or sofa,
or even lying down on your back with your eyes closed.

(04:07):
There's a good chance this episode will send you to sleep,
which is part of the idea this time. Anyway, Sometimes
people say that my episodes do help them to fall asleep,
and I don't know what to think of that, really,
because well, that's not usually the plan, is it. But no,

(04:28):
I'm just kidding. It's fine. I'm happy if my talking
relaxes you, especially in this episode, so you could use
this to help you to sleep at night. I know
a lot of people use my episodes to relax. Quite
a lot of people choose to listen in bed and
end up falling asleep while I'm talking, probably because the

(04:48):
bed is so comfortable, not because of the things I'm saying.

Speaker 5 (04:51):
Of course no.

Speaker 4 (04:53):
With this episode today, that is part of the point.
In these stressful times, it's worth taking a bit of
time to slow down if you can, and give yourself
a bit of peace of mind. That is the idea today.
So relax, get comfortable and listen on. Just be careful

(05:15):
if you're driving or operating heavy machinery or something, or
if you're in charge of a nuclear power station and
you really really should stay awake at the control desk, obviously,
be careful in that situation. But otherwise just relax and
just in case you're not convinced, here is some information
about why stress and anxiety can seriously hinder your ability

(05:38):
to learn English.

Speaker 5 (05:39):
There is a.

Speaker 4 (05:39):
Solid scientific basis for this idea, so before we enter
the ASMR Zen School of English, here is a breakdown
of how this all works based on research into neuroscience, psychology,
and applied linguistics. So, first of all, stress affects your brain.

(06:05):
It affects the brain's learning systems. The key brain regions
involved in this are the amigdulla, which processes fear and anxiety.
Then there's the hippo campus, which is obviously where all
the hippos sleep in your brain, and the hippo campus

(06:25):
is vitals either where the hippos sleep or it's where
they go to university and sleep during lectures. That's the
hippo campus. It's in your brain. Yeah, and it's vital
for memory formation. And you think to yourself, that's funny,
that sounds familiar, Luke. Then, of course there's the pre

(06:48):
fund the what do you call it. There's the prefrontal
cortex as well, which is involved in attention. Yeah, hello, yeah,
you're still listening. Good, good, good, So the prefrontal cortex cortech.
There's the prefrontal cortex, which is involved in attention, planning

(07:12):
and working memory.

Speaker 5 (07:15):
Okay, And the.

Speaker 4 (07:16):
Thing is that you see when you're stressed or anxious,
these areas of the brain are affected in various ways.
The amigdala becomes overactive, triggering a fight or flight response,
which is the last thing you need, isn't it. When
you're lying down in bed or sitting or just doing

(07:36):
most things unless you want to fight someone or fly somewhere,
you don't want the fight or flight response to you,
especially if you're just trying to learn some English. Also,
when you're stressed or anxious, the hippocampus and prefrontal cortex
become less effective. It's a nightmare, isn't it. Yeah, they

(07:59):
both become less effective, impairing your ability to concentrate, encode
new information, and recall vocabulary or grammar rules, which is
like the opposite of what you want when you're trying
to learn and use English. Studies using fMRI scans show
that anxious learners exhibit reduced activity in brain areas associated

(08:22):
with language processing. Basically, if you're a stressed out, anxious
language learner, you just become a bit stupid. Have you
ever noticed that when you're stressed and nervous, it's like
your brain freezes and you can't think properly. How does
it affect your English? It probably causes you to make
more errors and you can't string words together fluently, which

(08:44):
is not much fun, is it? No, it isn't. We've
all been there. It's happened to all of us. So
give yourself a chance, listeners, give your amigdala, your hippocampus,
and your prefrontal cortex a little break. And it's not
only that, I mean, have you heard of the effective
filter hypothesis by popular language acquisition theorist Stephen Krashen. This

(09:08):
is one of the most cited ideas in language learning theory.
Stephen Krashen proposed to his wife and she said yes,
But that's another story anyway. Stephen Krashen proposed that emotional
variables like motivation, self confidence, and anxiety create a psychological

(09:28):
effective filter, which is a kind of filter which affects
the way you learn language. When anxiety is high, this
filter becomes a barrier that prevents input from reaching the
brain's language acquisition device. Yeah, that's just another way of
saying the way that your brain acquires new language. So

(09:52):
when you're anxious, this barrier excuse me, So when you're anxious,
this barrier comes up and toying the language just bounces
off it. These are scientific terms I'm using here, of course, dying.
You've heard that before, Okay. So calm learners absorb language naturally,

(10:16):
yea like that, and stressed out learners may hear the
input but not process or retain it. It's like I
can hear the words, just I can't. It's just buying
is not going in. In simple terms, stress causes your
brain to put up a barrier and the language just
bounces off and probably just falls on the floor or

(10:39):
something where I don't know, maybe a mouse might grab
it and eat it. And also cognitive overload. Language learning
is quite demanding. It demands working memory, that's the brain's
ability to hold and manipulate information. And when you're anxious,

(10:59):
your brain uses up cognitive resources dealing with fear or
negative thoughts. It's a bit like when you're trying to
use your phone and something's going on. You've got too
many apps open in your phone, and suddenly your phone
goes all slow. It's the same kind of thing cognitive overload,

(11:19):
so fear or negative thoughts. It's like having too many
apps or windows open in your phone or computer or something.
Your brain just kind of like, ah, what if I
make a mistake and there's less capacity left for processing grammar, vocabulary,
and pronunciation these language systems that our brains have to

(11:40):
deal with. And cortisol, which is important, it's a stress hormone.
Short term stress might increase alertness, but chronic stress that's
long term repeated stress. Frequent language anxiety can lead to

(12:01):
high cortisol, which does lots of bad things, including impairing
your memory. It impairs your memory. You think, what does
that mean, Luke, I know it's bad because of the
way you said it. Yeah, it impairs your memory. No,
if something impairs something, it just basically reduces its ability

(12:25):
to do it properly. Right, So high levels of cortisol
can impair your memory. Reduces learning plasticity, Yeah, plasticity, that
ability to flex and adapt and move. Right, This is
what your brain needs to do. It needs to be
quite what's the word for it. What's like a cat

(12:47):
that can jump around and move quite easily? What's the
word for that? Yeah, I must have some cortisol going
on in my brain despite speaking like this, which is
meant that I can't think of that word. It's on
the tip of my tongue. Ah, how annoying you know that?

Speaker 5 (13:06):
Do you have that?

Speaker 4 (13:07):
Does that ever happen to you?

Speaker 5 (13:08):
Listeners?

Speaker 4 (13:09):
You're just thinking, Oh, I've got a word, It's the
perfect word, but I just can't It's just it's right
there on the tip of my tongue, but I just
can't remember what it is. Anyway. Oh, it'll come back
to me. But high cortisole, I must have a bit
of quarters it maybe a bit of residual cortisole in
my brain or something which is stopping me from remembering
that word. It impairs memory and reduces learning plasticity and

(13:35):
also makes retrieval of learned material harder, which is, you know,
when you freeze up during conversation, you think, ah, what
was that? Was that really important stuff that Luke from
Luke's English podcast taught me? This is when I need
it to describe the plasticity of my mind. I've forgotten
the word. What is the word that describes the way

(13:56):
a cat can move around? Quite agile? Maybe agile? That's
quite good. Agile is a good word, the agility. High
cortisol reduces your mind's agility. You're learning plasticity, your adaptability,
your ability to flex, move and learn new things. Makes

(14:22):
your brain more rigid. We don't want rigidity, do we
Not in a brain anyway, Maybe in other parts of
the body. Depends depends on what you're doing anyway. Also,
have you heard of performance anxiety? Yeah, many learners report
fear of making mistakes, being judged, and not understanding or

(14:42):
being understood. And this social anxiety, which is totally natural,
can lead to various things which will not help your
learning English journey, including the avoidance of speaking opportunities. This
is where someone comes up to you and goes hello,
and you just run in the opposite direction, or reduced practice,

(15:05):
which is where you practice less or a vicious cycle
of fear, silence, stagnation, fear, silence, fear, silence, stagnation, fear.
I think you know what that is, silence and stagnation.

(15:26):
That's just where your English doesn't move, You never use it,
and it goes stagnant a bit like a pool of water. Right,
Imagine a pool of water in a field. There's no
running water. It's not part of a river or stream
or something. It's just a pool of dirty, muddy water,

(15:47):
and it stagnates and you don't want to drink that water.
That's all I'll say. So how to reduce stress for
better learning? First of all, you need a safe, supportive
environment laughter, ha ha, encouragement go on, you can do it,
and low stakes practice. Just give it a try. What's

(16:10):
the worst that can happen. You're in a safe space.
All of those things improve outcomes. Mindfulness and breathing techniques,
reducing cortisol, increasing focus, reframing mistakes, treat your mistakes as
part of the learning process, not an example of failure.

(16:33):
Gradual exposure. That doesn't mean slowly taking your clothes off. No,
it means practicing language in stages, starting with easy tasks
and making things a little bit more difficult as you
go on. And regular physical activity and sleep, getting out,
doing some exercise, getting plenty of sleep or however you
pronounce it sleep.

Speaker 5 (16:54):
That's it.

Speaker 4 (16:56):
These things support memory and emotional regulation and sixth the
sixth point in how to reduce stress for better learning.
Listen to the ASMR Zen School of English on Luke's
English podcast. So with this episode, I just want to

(17:20):
create a safe, supportive, low stress environment where you can
immerse yourself in English and just give yourself a chance.
The episode is called the ASMR Zen School of English.
What is ASMR, Luke, Some of you might be thinking, well,
ASMR stands for autonomous sensory meridian response. Apparently it's an

(17:46):
actual physical sensation, this response. Apparently it's a real physical
sensation that some people report experiencing in response to certain stimuli.
Have you ever heard of ASMR? People who enjoy ASMR
for relaxation describe it as a relaxing and pleasant tingling

(18:09):
sensation that usually starts on the top of the head
the scalp and moves down the neck and spine. Ooh,
that's nice, you might say. If you're experiencing this response.
People often describe it as a kind of brain massage.
Does that sound like nonsense? Personally, I've never actually experienced

(18:32):
this tingling sensation that people talk about, except for one time,
but I realized later that it was actually just there
was a small spider that had landed on top of
my head and.

Speaker 5 (18:41):
Ah, get it off.

Speaker 4 (18:43):
But apparently this is a thing, and judging by the
amount of ASMR video and audio content online, it is
very popular with humans. So have you ever seen that
kind of thing? ASMR content videos of people whispering and
handling certain materials.

Speaker 5 (19:11):
A lot of.

Speaker 4 (19:14):
Handling materials that produce a certain kind of dry, high
frequency sound, a lot of brushing, rustling, clicking, mouth popping,
rubbing fingers together, gently, massaging microphone mufflers, and things like that.
It's pretty funny. You hear people on videos go like, guys,

(19:38):
welcome to the ASMR you tube channel that kind of thing.
It's quite funny really.

Speaker 5 (19:48):
For me.

Speaker 4 (19:49):
ASMR content, it's really just about relaxing, being quiet, listening
to certain pleasant sound frequencies, and ridding yourself of stress.
It could be just the sounds of nature or just
any kind of calm, comforting atmosphere. How does ASMR work well? Apparently,

(20:11):
it's typically triggered by soft, repetitive sounds and gentle visuals.
Common triggers for this response include whispering or soft spoken voices,
also tapping lightly on objects, page turning or rustling paper

(20:38):
or similar materials, hair brushing, crinkling or rustling sounds like
rustling dry paper or leaves or something, and even personal
attention like someone pretending to give you a haircut or
pretending to give you a medical checkup. These triggers can
make listeners feel calm, comfort and sometimes even sleepy. How

(21:02):
is ASMR used for relaxation or People use ASMR videos, podcasts,
or audio tracks to reduce anxiety and stress, fall asleep more, easily,
focus better during work or study, and soothe feelings of loneliness.
Because many ASMR videos simulate one on one attention, some

(21:23):
people even describe it as a form of meditation or
mental reset, especially when combined with ambient music or nature sounds. Personally,
I just like ambient music and the sounds of nature,
and I find that to be enough to put me
in the right headspace. I don't need to hear someone

(21:43):
clicking or whatever it is. I whacked the microphone. Sorry,
did that give you a shock? You're like, oh, this
is nice, but ah, why did you hit the microphone? Anyway,
today let's combine ASMR or at least some relaxing ambient

(22:08):
sounds with learning English. Again, if you are driving, you
might want to skip this episode seriously, because, as I said,
it's designed to make you feel very relaxed, calm, and sleepy.
So please do take care of yourself and your surroundings. Okay,
I'm quite serious about that, just in case, you know,

(22:29):
don't feel anxiety or anything.

Speaker 5 (22:31):
But watch out.

Speaker 4 (22:34):
There is a PDF with the text of what I'm saying,
and also music credits are given at the end of
the episode. So now that you're ready, let's enter the
ASMR Zen School of English on Luke's English podcast.

Speaker 5 (22:51):
Here we go.

Speaker 4 (22:54):
If you could just take off your shoes please, and
also if you could wash your hands before entering, that
be great. Yes, rid yourself of the encumbrances of normal life,
leave your stresses and strains at the door and your coat.
If you prefer, you can slip into some more comfortable clothes,

(23:17):
but please do stay dressed. Full body nudity would not
really be appropriate here. It's not that kind of thing.
If you like, you can close your eyes unless you
need to keep them open for whatever reason, like, for example,
if you need to see, or if people around you

(23:40):
will think it's weird that you're just there with your
eyes closed, and you're worried that they're going to say
things like, oh, look at that person with their eyes closed,
what are they doing. Look, let's steal his phone or
something like that. So you know, eyes open or closed,
it's your choice. So you can imagine a very peaceful place.

(24:00):
It could be a garden, it could be a spa.
It could be up in the mountains or even above
the clouds, somewhere far far above Lepland, where the air
is clear and the clouds are soft. M that's nice,
isn't it, lovely soft clouds. So, now that you're ready,

(24:29):
let's drift away into a different kind of learning zone.
Welcome to the asmr Zen School of English on Luke's
English Podcast. This is a place where the mind is calm,
Your body is still unless you're listening to this while

(24:53):
walking or jogging or something, which some people do. But
let's just say here, things here are still Things are
still here. Things are still here. They haven't gone away.
You've just got your eyes closed. Yes that was a joke. Good, okay, good, good.

(25:15):
You're still alive. And the English language flows around you
and through you like a peaceful stream made of words
and water, wet words, lots of wet words flowing around.
Just let the English flow here in this English language

(25:35):
stream of consciousness where wet words work wanders in this space.
There are no exams. There is no pressure, no stress,
no annoying green owls sending you passive aggressive notifications to

(25:55):
your phone about your language learning routine. No, none of
that stuff. Only words, gentle, beautiful words, drifting softly like
clouds across a blue sky, a blue sky that is

(26:17):
perfectly clear, except for the clouds, of course, which, as
I said, are gently moving across because of a very
slight wind. But don't worry. It's not a strong wind.
It's not it's not that strong. It's not very windy
here where you are, or anything like that, So don't
worry about wind. No, that would be stressful. No stress,

(26:40):
thank you.

Speaker 5 (26:41):
No.

Speaker 4 (26:41):
I mean yes, there are fairly strong winds way above,
like much higher in the sky, which is why those
clouds up there are drifting like that. But down here
there's just a pleasant cool breeze. It's funny, isn't it.

Speaker 5 (26:58):
Wind?

Speaker 4 (26:58):
Actually it works like that sometimes, doesn't it. It can be
like really windy up in the air, but then less
windy nearer the ground, or the other way around, depending
on different meteorological factors. It's quite interesting really when you
think about it and it's invisible.

Speaker 5 (27:15):
What is wind exactly? What is it?

Speaker 4 (27:18):
And where is it? Where is wind? And where's it going?
And why is it in such a hurry all the time?
Slow down wind, Just take it easy, Just stay here
for a while anyway, sorry, Take a moment now, just
to be still. Close your eyes unless you are riding

(27:40):
a bike through a crowded area or walking next to
some cliffs or something.

Speaker 5 (27:45):
But close your eyes or at.

Speaker 4 (27:48):
Least soften your gaze, meaning relax your eyes so they
go a little bit out of focus, you know, and
then just stare off into the middle distance looking at
nothing in particular, which might make you look a bit
brain dead, possibly, but don't worry about that now. Just

(28:08):
let the world around you go quiet. If people nearby
are making a lot of noise, just politely tell them
to shut up because you're listening to the asmr Zen
Meditation School of English. I'm sure they'll understand, Like, just
can you shut up for a bit, I'm trying to
meditate and then listen, Just listen. Let's begin by breathing together.

(28:37):
Breathing is very important, as I expect you've noticed during
your life. Breathe with me now. Inhale through your nose
and exhale through your mouth. Good again, inhale.

Speaker 3 (29:02):
Hold.

Speaker 5 (29:04):
And exhale.

Speaker 4 (29:12):
Very good. That was some excellent breathing. They're well done,
really good. You see, sometimes you learn more than just
English on this podcast. You also learn important life skills,
like how to breathe. Next time, maybe I'll do something
about how to digest food or how to absorb water
through osmosis. Maybe that I could do that next time.

(29:33):
But anyway, let's not worry about that now. That's another
meditation for another time.

Speaker 5 (29:39):
For now, just.

Speaker 4 (29:41):
Breathe and listen. Now let's begin our journey through English.
Each word, each phrase, not the entire language, of course,
that would be impossible. I mean, have you seen the
size of the Oxford Dictionary. It's massive. So no, we're

(30:05):
not going to go through every word in the entire language.
That would take ages. But let's begin our journey through
a little bit of English, like a little corner of it, somewhere,
like a little garden maybe at the edge of a
park in a town which not many people visit, but
it's actually very nice, something like that. But in terms
of English, you understand each word, each phrase, a step

(30:29):
on a quiet path through a peaceful garden. Of language,
Section one, the vocabulary of calm. These are words of stillness,

(30:51):
words of peace. Let them wash over you, like you've
just decided to lie down in a river. You might
a towel later, just to dry yourself off, because remember
wet words, like I said earlier. But anyway, let the
words wash over you. Words of peace. And yes, that's

(31:13):
peace with a long vowel sound, e peace, not a
short vowel sound, because that would be words of piss.
And that's never good, is it, especially if they're washing
over you. Okay, words of peace, tranquil a tranquil lake,

(31:35):
a tranquil pond, a tranquil puddle of water on the
floor that someone needs to clean up perfectly.

Speaker 5 (31:43):
Still say it with me.

Speaker 4 (31:46):
Tranquil, tranquil, tranquil, tranquility, tranquility, tranquilie, tranquilizer, tranquilized, tranquilized. Do

(32:10):
you feel tranquilized? You should do by the time you've
finished listening to this. Are you all right, Simon, I've
been listening to the asmrs N School of English. I
feel a bit tranquilized. Yeah. Soothing, A soothing voice, a

(32:36):
soothing cup of tea to soothe your throat and your
mind and your brain and your head and your thoughts.

Speaker 5 (32:47):
Soothing, soothing, soothing.

Speaker 4 (32:56):
Gentle, a gentle touch, a gentle breeze, A gentle reminder
to like and subscribe to Luke's English podcast, which is
available on all major podcast platforms and on YouTube and
LP Premium of course, which is available at teacher luke

(33:18):
dot co dot uk slash Premium. Just a gentle reminder there, gentle.

Speaker 5 (33:30):
Calm. I am calm. You are calm.

Speaker 4 (33:36):
He is calm, She is calm. It is calm. We
are calm, they are calm. We are all calm together.

Speaker 5 (33:51):
Calm.

Speaker 4 (33:53):
Remember the silent L in that word, right, Calm Okay,
not calm, no calm, just calm down. That's what my
mum and dad used to say to me when I
was a child because I was quite hyperactive. Just Luke,

(34:17):
just calm down. Look, just sit still. Stop stop fidgeting.
Put no, put that down, put it put it away.
Stop stop that, don't do that. That's just stop it.
Just calm down. The next word is serene, serene, serenity, serenity, serene.

(34:52):
The forest is serene, the ocean at dawn is serene,
unless there's a big storm or something, but not today.
By the way, just in case you need a definition
for this particular word, the words serene, according to Oxford Dictionaries,
means calm, peaceful, untroubled, tranquil. For example, her eyes were

(35:16):
closed and she looked very serene because she was listening
to the asmrs N School of English on Luke's English podcast. Calm, peaceful,
and untroubled tranquil. So basically the same meaning as the
other words we just mentioned. Yeah, English is full of synonyms,
isn't it.

Speaker 5 (35:34):
It is?

Speaker 4 (35:36):
Synonyms, so many synonyms, just millions of synonyms, synonyms that
can be a bit confusing sometimes for learners of English.
I know, but never mind that. Now this is a
safe space. It's a stress free environment. Remember you are calm,

(35:56):
you are peaceful, you are tranquil, are serene. This is
a serene place where we don't worry about things too much.
Just as long as we're all complying with health and
safety regulations and we've done a full risk assessment before
doing pretty much anything, don't worry. Well, there is insurance
here at the Zen School of English. So if all

(36:18):
of those bits of admin have been fulfilled, you can
just chill out and be serene and peaceful. The moment
right now is peaceful. Let these words live in your mind.
Let them echo like the soft ringing of a bell,

(36:39):
a nice bell, like one in a temple, not a
really annoying one like the bell in a school playground.

Speaker 5 (36:46):
You know, clang a lang, lang a lang.

Speaker 4 (36:48):
Or a massive and really loud bell like Big Ben
in London. No, no, no, no, this is a nice,
soft meditation bell.

Speaker 5 (36:59):
Bong bong bong.

Speaker 2 (37:09):
Where do you go for Ireland's biggest conversations, insightful answers,
fastest updates and sharpest daytimes, good morning, good Morning and
our good day. Well over a million of you go
to Ireland's number one radio station, Artie Radio one. Listen
now on Arte Radio player.

Speaker 1 (37:30):
A cast recommends podcasts we love.

Speaker 2 (37:33):
Would you like to be Better with Money? Do you
struggle to save and control your spending? Or do you
want advice on how to invest, make extra money or
buy your first home. A new podcast from The Irish
Times is your Crash Course in sorting out your finances.
All episodes of Better with Money, hosted by me Aideen Finnegan,
are available now on Spotify, Apple, on Irish Times dot

(37:56):
Com or wherever you get your podcasts.

Speaker 1 (38:00):
Cast is home to the world's best podcasts, including the
David McWilliams podcast, I'm Grandmam and the one you're listening
to right now.

Speaker 4 (38:13):
Section two Affirmations in English. Let's now continue with some affirmations.
These are short sentences that remind you of what is
true and what is possible. You can repeat them out
loud or silently in your heart, although that won't be

(38:35):
as beneficial to your English, to be honest, but anyway,
try to repeat these affirmations with me. I am learning
slowly gently, I am learning I understand more and more

(38:57):
each day. I understand more and more each day. And
by the way, these aren't supposed to be difficult shadowing exercises,
by the way, No, these just positive and calming affirmations
for learners of English. If you want more challenging, listen

(39:18):
and repeat pronunciation drills, you could sign up to LP Premium, which,
as I said before, is available at teacher Luke dot
co dot uk slash premium. But anyway, back to the affirmations,
here we go. English is becoming part of me, and
I am becoming part of English.

Speaker 5 (39:34):
Say it with me.

Speaker 4 (39:35):
English is becoming part of me, and I am becoming
part of English. Although that doesn't really make much sense,
but never mind. Now here's the next one. I relax

(39:57):
and I listen. Repeat it. Relax and I listen. I
am enough, I am enough, I am calm. I am calm,

(40:24):
I am still, I am still. My mind is open,
my mind is open. I learn without effort. I learn

(40:50):
without effort. Whoops, I'm sorry, just drop something. I learn
without effort. Although, to be fair, academic studies have shown
that a certain amount of cognitive effort is required to

(41:13):
make genuine progress in a second language. During adulthood. I
feel like I should say that, so learning without any
effort at all. Honestly, I'm not sure if it's that
realistic really, but those findings are to be fair countered
by the theory of the effective filter, as I mentioned before,
which does suggest that stress or other mental factors can

(41:33):
seriously inhibit the language acquisition process. So with that in mind,
just relax and be calm and peaceful and tranquil and serene,
and let these English words reverberate through your mind, body
and soul and form deep roots within you. Right, but
sort of imaginary roots, not real roots like the ones

(41:57):
under a tree, which are made of wood and all
covered in mud and earth. No, none of these roots,
these English roots that are deep within you. These are
sort of like soft, imaginary ones which are made of
air or light or energy or something, you know. And
these are the roots of English which are deep within you.

(42:19):
But in a nice way. Okay, So English is forming
nice deep roots within you.

Speaker 5 (42:28):
Okay.

Speaker 4 (42:28):
English is you, and you are English. Maybe not legally.
You would need to apply for a passport for that
and have it accepted, and that is quite a complex process.
You need to go through the government. Passport application, procedure,
and so on. But anyway, here in the asmr Zen

(42:50):
School of English Meditation, English is part of you, and
you are part of English, whatever that means. Some final
affirmations here. I am calm, I am calm, I am still,

(43:14):
I am still. My mind is open, my mind is open.
I learn without effort. I learn without effort. I let

(43:36):
the English take root within me. I let the English
take root within me. Sorry, I forgot what I was

(43:57):
going to say. There, No, it's gone. Still, can't remember
the word for how a cat moves agile, sprightly. I'll
get there eventually. Let's move on to section three, The
language garden. A simple story. Now, imagine a garden, a

(44:20):
beautiful garden, full of light and color. It's in England.
But don't worry. The sun is shining and it's a
lovely day. No rain is forecast today. Yes, that is possible.
The weather isn't all that bad here, honestly. So just
imagine a lovely garden in England, full of light and color.

(44:42):
In this garden, there's a wooden bench. It's a lovely
comfortable one, with a nice backrest and everything. And you
sit there, peaceful, comfortable. The wood of the bench supports
your legs. You're back really nicely and your bum is fine.

(45:03):
It's like not uncomfortable at all. This is a really
nice bench. This and it's clean as well. Yeah, no
cigarette butts on the floor, or empty beer cans lying around,
or bird droppings, which can often be the case in
parks in London, for example. I mean, there does tend
to be quite a lot of litter around these days,

(45:27):
but no, this is not that kind of place. And
this bench is lovely, peaceful, comfortable, serene, yes, tranquil, A lovely, peaceful, tranquil, serene,
clean bench. And you're sitting on it. Oh, lucky you,
You are the lucky one, because you know other people

(45:49):
wanted to sit on this bench. You know, when you
arrived in the park you could see them they were
going to sit on it, but you got there, you
walked extra quickly, and you've got their first, so you
better enjoy It's take a look around this lovely garden,
this nice park, and oh look at that. There's a butterfly,

(46:10):
a lovely little butterfly, and it comes down and lands
just near you. It's small, it's blue, It stays for
a moment and then just floats away. A bird flutters
past just by you. You look for the butterfly again,

(46:30):
but it's gone. Wait a minute, did that bird just
eat that butterfly? Anyway? Never mind that. Now the breeze
drifts over the back of your neck. Ah, maybe I
should have brought a scarf. You wander for a moment. Ah,
I don't want to catch a cold. I'm in England

(46:52):
and there's a slightly cool breeze on my neck. But
then your mind returns to calm, peace full, tranquil, serene thoughts.
Don't worry, You don't need a scarf. In the A
S M R L. E. P Zen Garden of Ambient
English meditation, everything's fine here. You hear some bird song,

(47:20):
a stream of water. Can't make the sound of water,
stream of water. Okay, you hear some bird song. You
hear bird song, a stream of water softly trickling nearby.
Everything is quiet, You are safe, You are peaceful, except

(47:51):
for that dog barking nearby.

Speaker 6 (47:52):
And that's a bit annoying, isn't it. It's always a
there's always a dog barking in the park. Noying is
that I can't stand yappy little dogs like that. God,
I wish it would just stop. The owner is over there,
just there at the edge of the garden. Give him
a glare, give him an evil look like that, and

(48:16):
you think to yourself, for goodness sake, I wish you'd
stop your bloody.

Speaker 5 (48:19):
Dog from barking.

Speaker 4 (48:20):
I'm trying to be peaceful here and trying to meditate, Honestly,
some people, eventually the dog stops.

Speaker 5 (48:35):
You breathe in and out.

Speaker 4 (48:40):
The sun is warm, the breeze is cool. The English
you can hear is all part of the garden, part
of the moment, like the trickle of water running along
the stream, or the pleasant atmospheric sound of the birds
in the trees. Here in the as Mr Garden of

(49:01):
Ambient English Meditation, everything is simple, Everything is calm. Let's
move on now to section four. The language flow.

Speaker 5 (49:11):
Useful phrases.

Speaker 4 (49:13):
Useful everyday English phrases whispered calmly into your ear, but
not in a creepy way, in a helpful way. So
let the language flow like a stream. Here are useful
English phrases. How are you today? Feeling pretty good? Actually,

(49:38):
how about you? I'm not so bad, thanks, but my
back's been aching again. Yeah, I think I must have
picked up an injury or something last weekend when I
was lifting some heavy boxes in the garage. But anyway,
I can't complain, really mustn't grumble. You know, it's a
beautiful morning. Have you heard that latest episode of for

(50:01):
Luke's English podcast. No, I sort of stopped listening to
it a few months ago. I think, what, Yeah, I know,
I just haven't had a lot of time recently, and
I got out of the habit, and well the episodes
are quite long, aren't they. And yeah, but you don't
have to listen to the whole thing in one go.

(50:23):
Never mind, you think to yourself, we have all the
time in the world here. You can go at your
own pace, take your time. Everything is okay. Would you
like a cup of tea?

Speaker 5 (50:37):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (50:38):
Yes, please, milk and sugar. Do you have almond milk?
It's just I'm a vegan. Oh no, I don't.

Speaker 5 (50:47):
Sorry.

Speaker 4 (50:48):
Oh well, in that case, I'll just have a glass
of water. Are you sure? Or just a glass of water? Well, yeah,
since you don't have almond milk, I'd rather not have tea.
I don't like it black, and I don't drink cow's milk.
I think dairy as well. I think it's cruel, you know,
you know what they do to the cows and everything.

(51:09):
Oh right, okay, well, would you like me to pop
out and get some almond milk. There's a shop just
around the corner I can. Oh no, no, don't worry. No,
just a glass of water is fine. Don't worry about me.
I suppose I'll just have to be the odd one
out drinking water when everyone else is having tea. But no, no,

(51:30):
don't worry about me. It's fine. Oh well, okay, then
listen to that lovely bird song. Isn't that lovely? What
is that bird? It's a pigeon? I think, what? Just

(51:51):
a pigeon. That's not all that relaxing. It's a bit annoying.
Really not the most beautiful of birds songs?

Speaker 5 (52:06):
Is it? The pigeon?

Speaker 4 (52:08):
But that's that's okay. Let's let's take another deep breath,
shall we?

Speaker 5 (52:12):
Yeah? Why not another another deep breath? Yeah? Okay, right
here we go. Ready go.

Speaker 4 (52:20):
Hold and really, okay, you're doing really well. You're doing
so well. I'm really proud of you. Really good stuff, excellent,
excellent work. Do you want another cup of tea?

Speaker 5 (52:34):
Sorry? I mean glass? Of water.

Speaker 4 (52:39):
No, I'm off to bed now. Actually I think off
to bed already. Oh okay, well sleep well, yeah, you
two looked. Take your time in the morning.

Speaker 5 (52:51):
Okay.

Speaker 4 (52:52):
We tend to have a bit of a lie in
and probably won't be up and about until about nine.
But feel free to use the kitchen if you want
or anything like that. Just one thing, just don't go
into the second bedroom, okay, the one after yours. Just
just don't go into the second bedroom. Or don't go
into the second bedroom, okay, any any particular reason. Well no, no,

(53:20):
it's just it's it's being decorated and there might be
some paint or something, so it's the best just not
to go in there.

Speaker 5 (53:29):
Just don't go in there.

Speaker 4 (53:30):
Okay, I'll avoid the second bedroom a bit weird, right,
so I'll say good night then, okay, good night.

Speaker 5 (53:38):
See in the morning.

Speaker 4 (53:39):
Sleep well, you two wake gently. I will enjoy the silence, Yes,
enjoy the uncomfortable silence.

Speaker 5 (53:51):
Yes, s Sorry?

Speaker 4 (54:00):
Can you can you switch off your phone please? Or
put it in flight mode? Okay, it's a bit weird,
isn't it flight mode? We're not on an aeroplane, But
all right, fine, this is the zen garden meditation. Please
put your phone on silent.

Speaker 5 (54:17):
Thank you.

Speaker 4 (54:19):
Right, let's move into another closing meditation here the stillness
of English. Now we return to stillness. Feel your body heavy,
I mean, just because you're tired of sleepy, relaxed, resting, Ah,

(54:40):
your thoughts like leaves gently floating on water. English is
with you, English is within you, and later English will
spring from you, like water from a little pipe on
the side of a building where water comes out and

(55:01):
it kind of drips down the wall and then flows
away down a little stream into a gutter or something,
and sometimes some pigeons gather there and wash themselves or
something like that. That's exactly like your English sort of,
or if you prefer, you can think of it as
a rich, flowing river, smoothly flowing downstream, over rocks, through

(55:22):
little gullies, feeding plants, trees, fish and frogs and things,
and flowing all the way across the country and eventually
out to see. That's exactly how your English is. English flows,
It flows through you. It's not a task, it's not
a challenge, it's not homework. It's a companion. It's a

(55:46):
quiet friend, well, a friend who does talk quite a
lot so not that quiet. But you know what I mean.
English is like a friend speaking softly to you.

Speaker 5 (56:00):
Fair enough.

Speaker 4 (56:01):
Sometimes you don't understand him very well and you have
to ask him to speak up a bit because sorry,
what I didn't No, I didn't catch that. No, could
you say that again? Uh yeah yeah hm. But today
it's fine. You understand everything you're doing beautifully. Just take

(56:22):
one last breath. I mean for this particular exercise, not
your last breath in your life. It's okay, take one
last breath inhale.

Speaker 5 (56:34):
Hold and exhale, let it.

Speaker 4 (56:38):
Go, and when you're ready, you can open your eyes
and drift off into sleep. Although that doesn't make any sense,
does it, because how can you open your eyes and
then sleep?

Speaker 5 (56:49):
I don't know.

Speaker 4 (56:50):
But anyway, open your eyes and drift off into sleep
or whatever. This has been the asmr Zen School of
English on Luke's English Podcast. Until next time, be kind
to yourself and remember the English will.

Speaker 5 (57:07):
Be with you always.

Speaker 4 (57:11):
Hello everyone, Yes, actually this is just a quick break,
actually just in case you want to pop to the toilet,
have a cigarette, drink a coffee and maybe not at
the same time of course. Okay, just a little break, okay, right, okay, everyone,
So it's time to get back into the asmrs N

(57:32):
School of English now, yeah.

Speaker 5 (57:33):
Yeah, if you've finished it, we've come on.

Speaker 4 (57:35):
We've got to get on with it, right, everyone back in,
please back in?

Speaker 5 (57:39):
Yeah, that's good, that's great. Yes, if you could just
come back in.

Speaker 4 (57:42):
Thank you very much. Yeah, we're going to do some
grammar now, yeah, come on everyone, hurry up over there,
we're about to start. Okay, if we go, let's do
some grammar. So all right, everyone, here is a beautifully
boring grammar lesson, deeply cut, arm soothing, and utterly mundane. Okay,

(58:07):
the subject this time? The subject, Well, let's go with
subject verb agreement in the present simple tense, possibly the
most yawningducing, sleep friendly topic in all of grammar, perfect
for an asmr English experience. So here is the ASMR

(58:30):
ZEN School of English, Part two, Subject verb agreement. Welcome
back to the ASMR ZEN School of English, where grammar
is quiet, still and deeply, deeply uneventful. It's not boring,

(58:56):
well maybe a little bit, but it is important. Tonight's
journey is into the present simple tense, a peaceful, sleepy
place where the subject and the verb agree perfectly.

Speaker 5 (59:15):
To be fair.

Speaker 4 (59:16):
Subject verb agreement in present simple tents is pretty basic stuff.
But you'd be surprised how often even advanced learners of English,
who have a wide range of vocabulary and a good
understanding of the syntax of English still get basic subject
verb agreement in present simple tents wrong, you know, saying
things like he run it finish, you know. And these

(59:36):
are advanced learners, I know. And then there's plural s
on the end of plural nouns. I mean, it's just
adding an s or an es onto some words. It's
not rocket science. But no, people still get it wrong.
Happens all the time. But anyway, Yes, sorry, let's keep
this cool, calm and collected and positive and non judgmental

(59:59):
here in the asthma Zen School of English. Are you ready,
let's begin. Take a deep breath. Yes, breathing is where
this all begins.

Speaker 5 (01:00:13):
Hold and release, very good. Excuse me, are you smoking
a cigarette? Sorry?

Speaker 4 (01:00:23):
Please don't do that. No smoking is not allowed here.

Speaker 5 (01:00:28):
Sorry. Can you put it out? Please?

Speaker 4 (01:00:30):
Yes, no, put it out, put it out, thank you
very much.

Speaker 5 (01:00:35):
Unbelievable.

Speaker 4 (01:00:37):
Right, So let's enter the forest of grammar, and there's
absolutely no smoking here in the forest of grammar. Okay,
no naked flames or cigarettes, because that the forest of
grammar is exceptionally dry. Sorry, what did you say?

Speaker 5 (01:00:53):
Sorry? Do you have a question?

Speaker 4 (01:00:55):
How about e cigarettes or vapes? Well, do you mind
not vaping here? I know it's not technically a fire hazard,
but well it might bother some people. Look just okay, look, okay,
if you have to, but can you do it over there?

Speaker 5 (01:01:15):
Please?

Speaker 4 (01:01:16):
Yeah, and don't let it blow into everyone's faces some people, okay,
thank you. Okay, here we are in the forest of grammar.
Everything here is still. There are no exceptions, only rules
reassuring reliable, predictable, boring grammar, rules like old trees or something.

(01:01:44):
Part one, the rule in the present, simple tense. The
verb must match the subject. That's it. That's the rule.
That's the whole thing, simple present and agreement.

Speaker 5 (01:02:03):
To be honest.

Speaker 4 (01:02:03):
It is a little bit more complex than that, but
this is supposed to be zen and meditative, so let's
just keep it simple. Listen now to the most calming
sentence in English. Here it is the most calming sentence
in English. He walks to the shop. Again, he walks

(01:02:24):
to the shop.

Speaker 5 (01:02:26):
Did you hear it? Yes?

Speaker 4 (01:02:29):
That wonderful s at the end of walks just.

Speaker 5 (01:02:33):
A little.

Speaker 4 (01:02:35):
A soft breeze on the tongue because he is third
person singular. He walks to the shop, she reads books.
It works perfectly. Singular subjects add an S to the verb,
and that's an S on paper and a on your tongue. Yes,

(01:02:59):
it's soothing, it's balanced. It's really low level stuff, to
be honest. I mean this is like a one slash
A two English and probably patronizingly basic for a lot
of you. This is the sort of thing that if
I did this in a B two English class or something,

(01:03:20):
some other students might go to the manager to complain
the class is too easy, you know, or they would
come up to me at the end of the class
and they would say, teacher, teacher, I am very boring
in this class, which is a complaint I have heard
in the past. Yes, it's not even correct, is it, Teacher,

(01:03:41):
I am very boring in this class. And I would say, yes,
I noticed that you are very boring in this class,
aren't you. And then I would say, I think what
you mean, though, is that you are feeling bored in
this class, right?

Speaker 5 (01:03:56):
Is that what you mean?

Speaker 4 (01:03:57):
And the student just looks at me blankly, without saying anything,
and I think to myself, you're in the right class.
Stop getting ahead of yourself. And that's fine today because
in the asmr Zen School of English, there are no levels,
there are no classes, and in fact, there is no
need to worry about which cefr band this is or

(01:04:22):
what I else score you're going to get, because remember,
we're being peaceful, calm, tranquil, serene and blissfully unaware of
the real world in this episode, Right yeah, Part two,

(01:04:46):
The exceptions that aren't really exceptions. Let's whisper a few more.
I walk, you walk, We walk.

Speaker 5 (01:04:56):
They walk.

Speaker 4 (01:04:57):
No s just walk, lat calm, repetitive, unnecessary, like the
ticking of a very old clock. Also unnecessary because we've
all got the time on our phones now. But he walks,
she walks, It walks. The S returns like a sleepy

(01:05:25):
cat slipping onto your lap. It stays there for a while, purring,
and then falls asleep. Is this still like the third
person singular s on verbs in the present? Simple, like
a cat sleeping on your lap. I've lost track of
the metaphor, to be honest, but never mind. The S
returns like a sleepy cat slipping onto your lap. It's

(01:05:50):
nice for a while because the cat is cute and
quite warm, and the purring is strangely calming, like a
little motorbike. I can't do the sound of a cat purring.
But then after some time it does start to get

(01:06:11):
quite uncomfortable with this cat sitting on your lap, and
you lose the feeling in your legs because sitting in
this one position is starting to cut off the blood
circulation a bit. But you don't want to move and
wake up the cat because it's cute. But you do
need the toilet.

Speaker 5 (01:06:29):
So I don't know.

Speaker 4 (01:06:30):
I don't know what you're going to do. So let's
just move on to Part three. Part three, practice sentences.
Let's repeat some sentences together. First me, then you.

Speaker 5 (01:06:46):
Here we go.

Speaker 4 (01:06:47):
She likes tea, okay, now you, she likes tea. Next,
they like tea, Now you, they like tea. Next, it
rains a lot. You, It rains a lot. Yeah, the

(01:07:11):
I like tea. You you like to It rains a lot.
These are a bit of a British cliche, aren't they,
These sentences just tea and rain. It's always the same
bloody cliches anyway, let's keep going. Here comes the next one.
She eats fish and chips. Another one who wrote this, Okay,

(01:07:33):
let's do it.

Speaker 5 (01:07:34):
She eats, she eats, she eats fish and chips. She
eats fish and chips.

Speaker 4 (01:07:45):
And I love grammar, your turn, I love grammar.

Speaker 5 (01:07:54):
Good.

Speaker 4 (01:07:54):
You're doing so well. Your subject and your verb are
in perfect harmony, like leaves falling gently onto a pond,
or a frog jumping into a river or something. Although
to be honest, I'm not really sure how your subject
verb agreement can really be compared to leaves falling onto
a pond or a frog doing anything really, But never mind.

(01:08:17):
It's a nice calm image, isn't it. Just feel free
to insert your own zen like imagery here, like maybe
some fish swimming under the surface, you know. Anyway, let's
move on to part four. This is the warning, okay,
but whispered the warning, Yes, the warning.

Speaker 2 (01:08:37):
Now.

Speaker 4 (01:08:37):
I wanted to use a different, less stressful word here,
but I couldn't think of one, so I'm just.

Speaker 5 (01:08:43):
Whispering it instead.

Speaker 4 (01:08:45):
So sh just a little warning, nothing to worry about.
It's been very simple so far as I'm sure you've noticed.
But be careful of tricky subjects. For example, my friend
and I go to the park, not goes. It's not
my friend and I goes. But why would it be goes?

Speaker 5 (01:09:09):
Well, I don't know.

Speaker 4 (01:09:10):
It's just go because two people means plural.

Speaker 5 (01:09:14):
We know we know that this.

Speaker 4 (01:09:16):
Sorry, can you not heckle? Can you not heckle the instructor?
This is supposed to be a peaceful, safe space. Okay,
can you stop smoking? Please? Honestly, let's continue. Also, it's
my friend and I go, not me and my friend go.

(01:09:37):
Because you wouldn't say me go to the park. Would
you know you wouldn't, because you'd sound like Tarzan. Me
go to the park, me play ball with foot. No,
it's not me and my friend go. It's my friend
and I go. Yes, I know this does seem obvious
to be fair, but still here's another one. The cat
goes to sleep. The cat goes to sleep, one cat one.

(01:10:00):
It all makes sense if you're patient, if you're still
even if you do still need the toilet quite badly now,
But you've got this cat sleeping on you. So I
don't know what you're gonna do. But are you just
going to have to let the rules carry you? Let
them guide you into slumber, into sleep.

Speaker 5 (01:10:19):
Just fall asleep.

Speaker 4 (01:10:21):
Actually, wait, hold on, wake up, wake up a moment,
wake up, wake up, for goodness sake. We haven't finished.
Wake up.

Speaker 5 (01:10:31):
Get me some water, glass of water. There you go.

Speaker 4 (01:10:34):
All right, okay, sorry, no, we haven't finished yet.

Speaker 5 (01:10:37):
Here's a towel. There you go.

Speaker 4 (01:10:39):
We haven't finished yet, no said, okay, look, have some coffee. Look,
have some coffee. There you go, good, drink it down.

Speaker 5 (01:10:45):
That's it. Look we've got work to do. Yeah, we've
got work to do.

Speaker 2 (01:10:49):
Yet.

Speaker 5 (01:10:49):
A bit more, bit more coffee. There you go, bit more,
bit more, bit more. There we go.

Speaker 4 (01:10:54):
Oh, sorry, spilled a bit. Alright, let's just clean that up. Okay, great,
So let's have some final affirmations here. Okay, repeat in
your heart or with your with your vocal tract would
probably be better. I remember the S, really, I remember
the S. The S is my friend, The S is

(01:11:17):
my friend. The verb agrees. The verb agrees. It always agrees,
It always agrees. It has no choice, It has no choice.
If it disagreed, it would get crossed out with a
red pen by a frustrated teacher. If it disagreed, it

(01:11:38):
would get crossed out with a pen by a red
pen by whatever. The verb has no choice, and neither
do I. The verb has no choice, and neither do I.
But that's okay, because I am calm. I'm tranquil, peaceful
and serene. I'm calm, I'm trans transfer, simple and PRIs

(01:12:00):
I can't remember. I am consistent. I am consistent. I
love subject verb agreement. Honestly, I really love it. No
I do, I promise I really like it more. I
love it. Okay, just repeat that, thank you. Let's carry

(01:12:22):
on with some more soothing English. Oh yes, we're not
finished yet. Prepare yourself for another utterly tranquil plunge into
the most peaceful corner of grammar. This time we explore
the gentle, soothing mystery of the extra syllable in third
person verb conjugations, and certain pluralized verb forms. Welcome back
to the asmr Zen School of English.

Speaker 5 (01:12:44):
Here we are going to look.

Speaker 4 (01:12:45):
At the gentle syllables of s, third person s, plural s,
the softest syllables in English. Tonight we walk the slow
path through the forest of English. Our feet touched the
moss of pronunciation, and every so often we hear something.

Speaker 5 (01:13:04):
What's that?

Speaker 4 (01:13:07):
Sh a sound? A shimmer, a soft syllable, an s
that brings with it a gentle echo, a ghost of
a sound. Sh Let's begin in the present simple. As
you know, when we talk about it, we often add

(01:13:27):
an S to the verb. Usually that airs is quiet.
It slips on like a silk glove. He reads, she walks.
It rains just one syllable, calm unchanged still. But sometimes
the s has needs. It wants more room, It wants
to be heard, It needs an extra syllable. Let's take

(01:13:48):
a moment with these. He misses his bus, she washes
her hands. It finishes quickly. Do you hear it? Miss
becomes misses, wash becomes washes, finish becomes finishes, a tiny

(01:14:10):
beautiful syllable, like a rain drop falling into a pond.
Is this happens when the verb ends in these sounds
like sense, senses, miss misses, sh wish, wishes, search, searches, mix, mixes.

Speaker 6 (01:14:43):
And.

Speaker 5 (01:14:46):
Buzz buzzes.

Speaker 4 (01:14:49):
These are busy sounds, sibilant, hissing. They need help, so
English gives them a little cushion, a soft syllable to
land on is. Let's now turn to plural s. The
s we add when there's more than one. Are you

(01:15:10):
asleep yet? Not just yet, but you will be in
a moment. Usually it's so soft. Two books, three dogs,
four cats, just a breath, just a whisper. But sometimes
that same soft s needs help again. Listen one bus,

(01:15:33):
two buses, buses, one bus, two buses, one watch, two watches,
one dish, two dishes. Again, that gentle syllable returns is.

Speaker 5 (01:15:54):
Just like with verbs.

Speaker 4 (01:15:56):
This is harmony, balance, a quiet life in the language.
This is how the force restores balance to not only
the English language, but to the universe. The force is
strong with you. Verbs and plurals, both welcoming the same sound.

(01:16:17):
When things get too sibilant, to hissy, too full, the
S needs space, so we give it is. Let's repeat
together softly. He passes, he passes, She kisses, she kisses,
It buzzes, it buzzes. What does she kiss and what buzzes?

Speaker 5 (01:16:41):
What you are? I don't know?

Speaker 7 (01:16:45):
Busses, wishes, boxes, busses, wishes, boxes, misses, misses, finishes, finishes, dishes, dishes.

Speaker 4 (01:17:13):
Do you feel it? The gentle rhythm of is cradling
each word, not loud, not strong, just present. Now the
final affirmation, the zen of the S The s is
not always simple. Sometimes it whispers, sometimes it sings. I

(01:17:36):
listen for the syllable. I feel the shape of sound.
I welcome the is when it comes. I am soft,
I am sibilant, I am syllabically at peace. And to
end the episode, let's do a gentle listen and repeat exercise.
Repeat these lines after me to practice what we have learned. Okay,

(01:18:01):
here we go. Every morning, doctor Martinez teaches a class
on phonetics.

Speaker 5 (01:18:08):
Your turn.

Speaker 4 (01:18:09):
Every morning, Doctor Martinez teaches a class on phonetics.

Speaker 5 (01:18:14):
Here we go.

Speaker 4 (01:18:24):
She analyzes the way English pronunciation varies across regions. She
analyzes the way English pronunciation varies across regions.

Speaker 5 (01:18:35):
Your turn.

Speaker 4 (01:18:48):
She washes her hands carefully before the lecture. She washes
her hands carefully before the lecture. She polishes her glasses
and dresses formally. She polishes her glasses and dresses formally.

(01:19:22):
As the class begins, she emphasizes the importance of precise articulation.
As the class begins, she emphasizes the importance of precise
articulation and focuses on the endings of certain words. And

(01:19:51):
focuses on the endings of certain words. She often uses
examples from dialect studies and discusses different speech patterns. She

(01:20:12):
often uses exactly. She often uses examples from dialect studies
and discusses different speech patterns in her lectures. She compares

(01:20:36):
plural forms like churches, dishes, and entrances. In her lectures,
she compares plural forms like churches, dishes, and entrances and

(01:20:58):
verb forms such as what finishes and diminishes and verb
forms such as watches, finishes and diminishes. The class applauds

(01:21:20):
when she demonstrates tongue twisters. The class applauds when she
demonstrates tongue twisters. That was the class applauding when she
demonstrated a tongue twister. Peter Piper picked a pack of

(01:21:40):
pickled peppers. She sells seashells on the sea shore. The
shells that she sells a seashells, I'm sure. And if
she sells seashells on the sea shore, the shells she
sells must be seashell shells. The class applauds when she
demonstrates tongue twisters or recites passages filled with tricky sounds,

(01:22:11):
or recites passages filled with tricky sounds. She also addresses
questions and encourages participation. She also addresses questions and encourages participation.

(01:22:40):
Her office contains dozens of boxes, shelves full of THECES,
and piles of marked quizzes. Her office contains dozens of boxes,
shelves of THECES, and piles of marked quizzes. Don't worry,
there are no feces involved at all. What have you
got shells of feces? That's disgusting.

Speaker 7 (01:23:03):
No.

Speaker 4 (01:23:03):
Her office contains dozens of boxes, shells of THESS, and
piles of marked quizzes. Yeah, that's THESS. That's the plural
of thesis, which is what a student might write if
they were doing an academic PhD. That you write a thesis,

(01:23:27):
and the plural of thesis is THESS with a thh
sound at the beginning. That's not theeces meaning pooh, let's
carry on. She rarely misses a detail and always organizes
her notes meticulously. She rarely misses a detail and always

(01:23:48):
organizes her notes meticulously. Her methodical style impresses her students,
and her enthusiasm energizes the classroom. Her methodical style impresses

(01:24:09):
her students, and her enthusiasm energizes the classroom. Her methodical
style impresses her students, and her enthusiasm energizes the classroom.
It's just a pity that she doesn't actually exist in

(01:24:32):
the real world. She's just completely made up. Don't worry.
You don't have to repeat that last bit. So everybody,
this has been the ASMR Zen School of English on

(01:24:52):
Luke's English Podcast, where even confusion and nonsense are quite nice.
Until next time, stay curious, stay calm, peaceful, tranquil, serene, gentle, soothing,
and zen and don't forget. If you enjoyed this episode,

(01:25:13):
you could gently massage the like button or maybe just
rustle rustle some paper up against it or something, and
subscribe to the podcast and consider signing up to LP premium.
But there's no pressure or anything like that. And if
you are still conscious, you could perhaps consider leaving a

(01:25:35):
comment in the comment section. Perhaps you could share your
own methods for staying calm and peaceful or how you
manage stress while learning English, and to prove that you're
not a skeleton with headphones on, leave a comment with
any of the keywords from this episode, which I suppose
must be calm, peaceful, tranquil, and serene. This episode has

(01:25:58):
been just a bit of fun, but also hopefully a
chance to relax a little bit and maybe just have
a bit of a laugh. But anyway, next time it'll
be back to normal podcasting. And by the way, listeners,
do you remember the word I couldn't remember earlier on

(01:26:19):
in the episode, the word that basically describes the way
that a cat can move quickly and easily. I couldn't
remember the word earlier. Well, I've remembered now. The word
I was trying to remember was the word nimble. Yes, nimble,
nim b l e. Cats are nimble because they can

(01:26:41):
move quickly and precisely, they can jump out of the way,
They are agile. They are nimble And if you remember,
cortisole is a stress hormone which prevents your mind from
being nimble. When our brain is flooded with cortisol, we
get frozen or blocked and we can't learn or think

(01:27:02):
very clearly. So hopefully now at the end of this
relaxing episode, the cortisol is far far away from your
brain and you're feeling not only relaxed and zen like,
but also your mind is nice and nimble and full

(01:27:25):
of plasticity, which is always what you want, isn't it
in your brain plasticity? Well, I hope that I've given
you a little bit of extra plasticity with this episode,
allowing you to be as nimble as you possibly can
in order to absorb as much of that precious English

(01:27:46):
as possible.

Speaker 5 (01:27:47):
You're welcome.

Speaker 4 (01:27:53):
I would also like to take this moment at the
end of the episode here to give some credit to
the different bits of music that you heard during this wonderful,
wonderful episode. So, at various points during this listening experience,
you have heard sleep music number one by Chris Hougan,

(01:28:16):
Chilled Slow by Jim Thompson, Slow Emotion by Jim Thompson,
Amber by Yron, Somnia Variation three by Reidmathis, Underwater Exploration
by god Mode, Ambisoft by Jim Thompson, and am pad
Nice by Jim Thompson. Quite a lot of Jim Thompson

(01:28:39):
in there. He's my Brother, by the way. For more
ambient music by Jim Thompson, My Brother, check out his
album Ambient Anthology, available on band Camp at Jim Thompson
dot bandcamp dot com Ambient Anthology. It's available as a

(01:29:00):
digital download or on good old Fashioned compact disc. There's
a link in the description. Otherwise, if you can follow this,
go to https colon Forward, Slash Forward, Slash, Jim Thompson
dot bandcamp dot com, Slash album Slash, Ambient Dash Anthology,
or just check the link in the description. It's probably

(01:29:22):
much easier, isn't it. Put everyone out there in podcast land,
stay cool, stay calm. You can open your eyes now.
Hopefully when you open your eyes you haven't crashed your

(01:29:44):
car into a tree or something. You will open your eyes.
Oh where am I? Oh my goodness, I've crashed into
a tree. Hopefully you managed to drive all the way
home with your eyes closed, and that you managed to
park the car safely if you were driving. But in
any case, well done. You got to the end of
the episode. You survived. You're one of the lucky ones.

(01:30:07):
But until next time, everyone out there, thank you for listening.
And now I will just say good bye bye.

Speaker 5 (01:30:16):
Bor bor boro boo.

Speaker 3 (01:30:24):
Thanks for listening to Luke's English Podcast. For more information,
visit teacher Luke dot com dot UK. If you enjoyed
this episode of Luke's English podcast, consider signing up for

(01:30:47):
Luke's English Podcast Premium. You'll get regular premium episodes with stories, vocabulary,
grammar and pronunciation, teaching from me, and the usual moments
of humor and fun. Plus, with your subscription, you will
be directly supporting my work and making this whole podcast
project possible. For more information about Luke's English podcast Premium,

(01:31:10):
go to teacher Luke dot co dot uk slash premium
info