Lux Radio Theatre - Alias The Deacon

A high-budget anthology series adapting major films and stage plays for radio, often with the original Hollywood stars. It brought cinematic drama into living rooms weekly.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
Spray. Then it's Hollywood. The Lots Radio Theater brings you
Bob Burns in alias The Deacon with helen Wood ladies

(00:21):
and gentlemen. Your producer, mister Cecil D. De Mill, greetings
from Hollywood ladies and gentlemen. Even in the twentieth century,
there's no telling where you run into Robin Hood or
under what name to night. He's a long way from
Sherwood Forest. He wears not a suit of Lincoln greens,

(00:43):
but one of modest black. He doesn't carry a long bow,
but a deck of cards. And his name, known to
every sheriff in the Middle West, is the Deacon. But
don't be alarmed of all the gentry who deal cards
with scientific knowledge instead of blind hope. The hero in
our play alias The Deacon, is the most charming and
the gentlest. His coat may conceive a pair of aces,

(01:05):
but beneath it beats a heart of gold. It's a
part for Bob Burns, if ever there was one, and
so we followed the inspired lead of Universal Pictures by
casting him in this radio adaptation of the screen's success.
It took a little persuasion, though, to get him here.
Bob said he'd promise some fellow to go fishing with him.
We got him to postpone this trip only by revealing

(01:25):
a very special rendezvous for Trout. I'd been reserving that
spot for a holiday of my own after finishing the
picture Northwest Mounted Police. But I think Bob Burns and
Alias the Deacon will be worth the sacrifice. Wherever the
Deacon alights from his private car, any passing truck Injustice
is on its way to defeat, and Romance runs its
proper course, and certain petty tyrants are apt to start

(01:48):
running too. Any play with Bob Burns in it is
a friendly play. But another kind of friendliness that we're
very proud of is your loyalty to our product. Luck's
Flakes never let us down yet, and I know lux
Flakes will never let you down. Now. I'm sure you're
anxious to meet the Deacon. So we've raised the curtain
on the first act of Alias the Deacon, starring Bub

(02:10):
Burns in the title role and Helen Wood as phyllis
the Truxton County Fair somewhere in the Middle West. It's
Saturday afternoon and a holiday crowd jams the midway, gazing
in awe at the world's greatest collection of freaks, gasping

(02:30):
as the high diver plummets into the tank, meanwhile clutching
tightly to their breasts. They're harder and baby dolls and canes.
In a secluded corner of the grounds, another attraction holds
forth a quieter and more intimate form of entertainment. For
here is where Deec Caswell alias the Deacon, has some
of his temporary stand to collect this crowd. The Deacon

(02:53):
plays a mournful tune on a mournful looking instrument, and
as the curious gather around, knowing farmers hold on to
that pocket book. They've seen men like the Deacon before you.

Speaker 2 (03:09):
You're going, They're going.

Speaker 1 (03:11):
On a minute, ladies, you don't have to leave. That
baby ain't disturbing me.

Speaker 3 (03:17):
Oh he ain't.

Speaker 4 (03:17):
Nay there, you're just giving him crying.

Speaker 1 (03:24):
Well, I guess everybody ain't got the same pace for music, pots,
But there's one sound that's music to everybody's ears. That's
the music of jingling coins. Of course, you have to
have the coins to jingle. Well, that's where I come in, gentlemen.
I'm gonna give each and every one of you a
chance to win some of these coins right now, I
have here in my hand, free ordinary every day playing cards,

(03:46):
the ace, the deuce, and tray of diamond. I'm gonna
shuffle these cards a little and lay him face down
here on the stands Now, all you got to do, gentlemen,
is watch where I put the ace. Why it's the
sample honestly, sometimes I'm right a shaved. Here we go.
Now watch it closely?

Speaker 5 (04:02):
One?

Speaker 1 (04:03):
Two, three? Which one is the eighth? Anybody like to try?

Speaker 6 (04:06):
I bet a half a dollar?

Speaker 1 (04:07):
All right? Brother? Norm mount's too big or too small?
That's the ace?

Speaker 6 (04:10):
That one there?

Speaker 1 (04:11):
Let's see now? Well, well, brother, I guess you wasn't
watching very close that time you picked the trays.

Speaker 6 (04:17):
That's funny.

Speaker 1 (04:18):
Who'll be the next? Red blooded? Gentlemen? Watch it closely
now as many can. Players want to just put your
money on the card and be sure it's the right one.

Speaker 6 (04:26):
Hi short right here, you too, there's my money.

Speaker 1 (04:28):
Only one way to find out, gentlemen, turn up the
cards you bet on? Well, well, what do you know
about that? I win again? All right now? Who'll be
the next? Just a minute?

Speaker 6 (04:37):
You you're switching those cards around. You're crooked?

Speaker 1 (04:40):
I resent that here you deny it. No, I just resented.
All right, gentlemen, Now, who'll take a chance. It's a simple, honest,
little game. Come on, folk, Come on, don't let me
stand here talking to myself. I've heard all this before.
How about you, brother? Like tride once more? You cleaned me?
Oh that's too bad? How much did it clean?

Speaker 6 (05:00):
For sixty cents?

Speaker 1 (05:01):
Swear brother, you wasn't very dirty, was I'll fright? Thank you? Brother?
Step aside here, folks, let a gentleman in with courage invasion.
Step right up, sir. Now all you got to do
is take the right car. Sure, I know all right?
Now watch it one, two, three, and away we go,
opportunities knocking folks, a little risk and a big profit.
I'll bet a dollar a dollar the gentleman bets a dollar,

(05:23):
and which card is the eighth? Brother? That one right there?
Oh I'm sorry, brother, but you guess wrong? My my,
I sure thought you had me that time. I want
to try it again. You're a real sport, brother, No eight.
I'm the chief of police. That's what I was. Huh,
the chief of police. Uh huh, Well, brother, I guess
that's one time I guess wrong. All right, mister, you

(06:02):
see that sign over there where oh you are now
leaving Truckston. That's the sign you mean yeah, and the
sign means you. I go on beat it? Thanks gee
o't thank me. The roof of jail didn't leak, he
wouldn't be getting off so easy. There's a buzz day
poll right over there. Now come on. The bus leaves
in five minutes. Get on and stay on. Where does
this bus go if it's ending my business? Next town?

(06:24):
Is shelf in the county seat? Well? Does your jurisdiction
extend that far? No, it don't. Well, then you wouldn't
mind if I stop over there long enough to give
one of my educational lectures. Why no, even why I'm
a friend the sheriff to reserve a nice room with
a southern exposure.

Speaker 2 (06:39):
Why Philip, Oh, hello, chi's David. What are you doing
here waiting for the bus? I'm leaving Truckston the fine night.

Speaker 1 (06:46):
You picked the trevn what's the idea my job?

Speaker 3 (06:48):
Hold it up.

Speaker 2 (06:49):
There's no reason I'm staying here any longer.

Speaker 1 (06:51):
It is not well. I hope things break better for
you wherever you're going.

Speaker 6 (06:55):
Hey, hey, you fools, Hey, you weaking for the bus.

Speaker 5 (06:58):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (06:58):
Why, Well, I'm shot fools.

Speaker 6 (06:59):
But the route rush down at the pike. The bus
will be about six hours late.

Speaker 1 (07:02):
You mean I have to spend six more hours in
this broken down hill belly town. Why why, it'll be
a pleasure cheap, But maybe it's a pleasure I can skip.
Where does that delivery truck go? Anybody know? Hi?

Speaker 6 (07:14):
Yeah, that's Johnny Sloan go and hit to Shelton.

Speaker 1 (07:16):
Probably Shelton. Ah, well, maybe I ought to have a
talk with mister long evening, young fella.

Speaker 5 (07:23):
Hello.

Speaker 1 (07:24):
Kind of bad night all round.

Speaker 6 (07:26):
I'll say it is. I've been driving through fludds for
two and a half hours. The water in my motor
and my gas tank, got it in the carburetor and ignition,
but not a dropping my radiator.

Speaker 1 (07:33):
Say, I don't suppose I might ride along? No, I
suppose not. It's Johnny you'd like to give someone a lift?

Speaker 6 (07:40):
I just told him no passengers company room.

Speaker 1 (07:41):
Oh I don't mean him. There's a young lady here, then, sorry,
I guess the age just chivalry is there?

Speaker 6 (07:46):
It is with the Crane trucking company.

Speaker 1 (07:48):
Oh, come on, son, you can take a chance, just
this once.

Speaker 6 (07:50):
Why I can wait. I'm sorry, lady, but I or
are you the person who wants to lift?

Speaker 2 (07:57):
Yes, but don't put yourself off to me?

Speaker 6 (07:59):
Why, no trouble at all, No trouble at all. You
married me, no sweetheart, no family.

Speaker 3 (08:12):
The father mister district attorney, and he's s and I
are very little of your business, all right, all right.

Speaker 6 (08:18):
If you want to be the mystery lady. But aren't
you afraid riding through the night this way with me
a guy you never met before? No? Oh you're not.

Speaker 1 (08:25):
Huh no, what.

Speaker 6 (08:26):
Did you do if I stopped the truck on this
lonely road? You wouldn't do that, wouldn't I?

Speaker 1 (08:29):
Though?

Speaker 5 (08:29):
No?

Speaker 6 (08:30):
Uhh, we'll see about that. Well, well you you're having
any protection, now, that's right. Oh why don't you scream?

Speaker 2 (08:40):
I'm horse from last night?

Speaker 6 (08:43):
Okay, you win, but it's a good thing. I have
to be in Shelton by morning.

Speaker 1 (08:46):
Me too, son, Let's go.

Speaker 6 (08:47):
What and how did you get back there?

Speaker 5 (08:50):
Oh?

Speaker 1 (08:50):
I just figured think you change your mind about taking
the little lady. You might change it about me too,
of course I ain't.

Speaker 6 (08:56):
It's perty she is, all right, all right, keep quiet
about it?

Speaker 1 (08:58):
Thanks, son?

Speaker 6 (09:09):
Well this is Shelton.

Speaker 2 (09:10):
Thanks a lot, missus. Loan's all right, tell me you
married me? No, sweetheart?

Speaker 6 (09:15):
No, why no, I haven't, and I won't have him
to lend my kick. Craposes another two hundred and fifty dollars,
the same being the rest of the purchase price for
the best little business opportunity in all Shelton. I see, yes,
him in front of you. You see a guy who
isn't gonna be a truck jockey all his life. Shelton
needs a first class garage. And I got my on
a place that the little fiction will make. The ones
here and now hang their grease racks in shame.

Speaker 2 (09:36):
I'm sure to be a success. Well, goodbye, I wait
a minute, what are you gonna do?

Speaker 3 (09:42):
Look for a job?

Speaker 1 (09:43):
Oh?

Speaker 6 (09:44):
Well, I see you again? Probably that's good. You see,
there's there's a lot of things we ought to talk about,
are they sure? A lot of questions I'd like to
ask you, questions like what?

Speaker 3 (09:54):
Oh like?

Speaker 1 (09:55):
Well, hey, where's the nurse barbershop? Oh?

Speaker 6 (09:58):
For the love are you are you still here?

Speaker 3 (10:01):
Well?

Speaker 6 (10:01):
What do you want?

Speaker 1 (10:02):
Yes, the nearest barber shop that's all.

Speaker 6 (10:04):
Across the street.

Speaker 1 (10:05):
Thanks son, thanks a lot for the rife.

Speaker 6 (10:09):
ABF you want a little tonic on the hair.

Speaker 1 (10:11):
Sheriff, Nope, just water. Sure you're the boys, shirk you're
the boss and make it fast envy. I'm a mighty
busy man since oil was discovered in this town.

Speaker 6 (10:19):
Morning, good morning, you're next thy, Yes, sir, Sheriff. It'd
be nice if we could have an oil boom life
this every year.

Speaker 1 (10:26):
I don't know. There's been an awful lot of riff
raft drifting into town.

Speaker 7 (10:29):
I bet you're keeping your good eye on all suspicious.

Speaker 1 (10:31):
Characters they, Sheriff, I'm keeping a special lookout for a
card sharp they run out of Truckston hitting this way. So, yes, sir,
I gotta were this morning. No tin horn gambler. Better
show yourself around here.

Speaker 6 (10:42):
Hey, mister, where are you going? I'll be back a
little later, but I'm ready for you now.

Speaker 1 (10:47):
Just a minute, mister, don't believe I've seen you around
here before. I'm Yates, Sheriff, Yates, Well, how do you do, Sheriff?
I'm Caswell, Deacon Caswell, Well, how do you do? Deacon? Hey?
Oh uh, yes, yes, I heard there was a lot
of strange goings on in this town. I figured I
could do some good around here as a matter of fact, Deacon,

(11:08):
I think you could.

Speaker 6 (11:09):
Now.

Speaker 1 (11:09):
For instance, I happen to know there's a lot of
gambling going on gambling. Tell me, Sheriff, where's the game? Well,
I ain't sure yet, but I kind of got my
eye on the Clark Hotel you have. Huh yeah, Elsie,
Clark's place just down the street. If my information is correct,
there's a bridge game goes on there pretty near every day.
Ain't it awful? The way some folks get into six hours?

Speaker 3 (11:34):
You're down three, Elsie, my goodness, But you do get
the cards, Missus Gregory, I play the ones I get
else if you certainly do, Mother, yes, and us along
with them. Well, ladies, I don't like to break up
the game, but I'm expecting mister Cunningham, how much do
I owe this time?

Speaker 2 (11:48):
A little less than thirty five dollars?

Speaker 3 (11:49):
Missus claud thirty five dollars. Oh well, I'll get it
out of the hotel safe. We'll go on with the
game as soon as I've seen, mister Cunningham. Dear me,
Elsie's been having awful bad luck, hasn't she. Of course
I can afford it, but Elsie, well, I don't know.

Speaker 2 (12:04):
He can afford it too, with a hotel like this. Well,
as a matter of fact, I think trying to hold
it is the reason she plays.

Speaker 3 (12:10):
She mortgaged the place to mister Cunningham before the boom came,
and he's one.

Speaker 2 (12:14):
Of those men who likes to be paid. Yes, I've
heard that about mister Cunningham. Well, I guess I'll have
to step across to the bank for a minute.

Speaker 3 (12:21):
And I'll be back in a few minutes. Don't be
too long, dear mother, listens, I'll be quiet. I won't
How much longer do we have to keep these bridge
games up.

Speaker 2 (12:29):
I'm getting sick of these women.

Speaker 3 (12:31):
We're going to play until mister Cunningham gets this hotel.
I don't see what mister Cunningham has to do.

Speaker 1 (12:35):
Well, I do.

Speaker 2 (12:36):
He happens to hold a morge too.

Speaker 3 (12:38):
He told me that anything I could do to help
him get this place, well, he said he wouldn't forget it.

Speaker 2 (12:43):
You mean he doesn't want missus Clarke to meet her.

Speaker 3 (12:45):
No, Mildred, be careful what you say, dear.

Speaker 2 (12:47):
It might be miss interprets.

Speaker 1 (12:51):
Over there, couldn't it. That's her hardware store. Jim Cunningham
owns that Cunningham. Huh, that's the same Cunningham that runs
the real estate office.

Speaker 8 (13:00):
Feller.

Speaker 1 (13:00):
Cunningham's a pretty important man in this town. Deacon. Mm hm,
you know this is mighty friendly of you to show
me around like this. Sheriff. Seems to be a right
promising little town. Well, we've had so many undesirables drifting
in lately. It's nice to meet up with a better
class than newcomer. And that's nice of you to say, Sheriff,
it is indeed, or not at all, not at all.
This is the Clark's Hotel right here, Deacon. I'll see

(13:21):
if we can get to your room. You a here, Deacon,
Thank you, Brother Willy customer here, Well, shaff oh for tomorrow, Willy.

Speaker 4 (13:31):
He's in the office drawing some more money from that
old weasel, Jim Cunningham.

Speaker 1 (13:35):
Now, Willie, mister Cunningham's been a good friend of your ma.

Speaker 4 (13:38):
Sure, he was a good friend of Whitey Hoytsmart too.

Speaker 3 (13:42):
Now he owns a property that's so cheryff.

Speaker 1 (13:44):
Oh, you can't believe everything you hear.

Speaker 4 (13:46):
Believe me, he wouldn't be coming around here with us
promises to pay if my papa was still alive. Well,
what kind of room do you want? Deacon's two dollars
kind for the three dollar times?

Speaker 2 (13:56):
Well, what's the difference, Well, there's no difference.

Speaker 4 (14:00):
We've only got one room left.

Speaker 1 (14:02):
Well, I kind of wanted the three dollar cary.

Speaker 4 (14:05):
Gee, that's well, Hey, hey kid, give me the teat
of me room, will you here?

Speaker 9 (14:10):
It is? Thanks Powell? Oh hi you chef.

Speaker 6 (14:13):
Hello, Hey, you're gonna be down to fight Saturday.

Speaker 9 (14:16):
I'll kill that guy.

Speaker 1 (14:17):
Sure, I'll be there a swell sheriff.

Speaker 6 (14:19):
All right, all right, let's get gone go where. We
got some road white to do before lunch. Oh, I
was just gonna take a little nap. Come on, come on.
The guy that's promoting this match wants to see some actions.
Get road wake, road wake all the time, road with.

Speaker 1 (14:33):
I didn't know you went in for prize fights in
this town, sair. Oh well we don't usually, Deacon. But
mister Cunningham is opening a new auditorium, and well you
know I see and this new note.

Speaker 6 (14:46):
That's right, Missus Clark, you can tear the others up.

Speaker 1 (14:49):
Marning Elsie, Hello Tom him, mister Cunningham. Folks, this is
Deacon Careswell, missus Clark and mister Cunningham, how do you do, deacon,
Please to meet you, ma'am. The Deacon's I'm to help
clean up the town.

Speaker 9 (15:01):
Oh is that's up?

Speaker 1 (15:03):
Well, I think I can clean up a little anyway.
That's fine, Deacon. Anything I can do for you, just
let me know. Now. That's very kind, mister Cunningham.

Speaker 9 (15:11):
I would morning vote.

Speaker 4 (15:16):
Ah, the Deacon wants a room the three dollars kinds.

Speaker 3 (15:19):
Oh, certainly. Will you just come this way, Deacon. I've
got a night room on the first floor. While you're
in town. Deacon, I'd like to have you meet our
ladies community league. I'm sure you have a lot of
things to tell us.

Speaker 1 (15:33):
Why, Missus Clark, you're a positive mind reader, Elsie.

Speaker 5 (15:37):
Oh here you are.

Speaker 2 (15:38):
We thought you were lost, Missus Clark.

Speaker 3 (15:40):
Deacon. This is missus Gregory and her daughter, Mildred Deacon Caswell.

Speaker 1 (15:43):
It's a pleasure, ladies.

Speaker 3 (15:45):
How do you do well?

Speaker 2 (15:45):
Are we ready to play?

Speaker 5 (15:47):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (15:47):
I'm sorry girl, but missus Howley isn't here.

Speaker 2 (15:50):
And play just a little bride Norah.

Speaker 3 (15:53):
The Deacon will think we've been gain Oh.

Speaker 1 (15:54):
Not at all, not at all.

Speaker 3 (15:56):
Perhaps you'd like to take missus Holly's place deacon. Oh,
but I'm sure he would.

Speaker 1 (16:00):
Well, now I must confess I have kind of puttered
around with cards on several occasions, just to make up
a foursome.

Speaker 3 (16:06):
Of course, then you will join us me.

Speaker 1 (16:09):
You mean for money?

Speaker 3 (16:11):
Oh, well, now it needn't be. We can play for nothing.

Speaker 1 (16:14):
Well I don't. Oh, I guess I wouldn't mind playing
for some trifling steaks just to be sociable.

Speaker 4 (16:20):
Oh that's so.

Speaker 2 (16:20):
Nice of you, Deacon. Well it is.

Speaker 3 (16:22):
Indeed, he'll only be about an hour.

Speaker 1 (16:24):
An hour. Well, i'd say that should be just about
long enough.

Speaker 3 (16:35):
That's our trick, deacon.

Speaker 1 (16:37):
Is it, missus Clarkon, Now, ain't that lucky?

Speaker 2 (16:39):
Lay your card please? Deacon?

Speaker 1 (16:40):
Oh certainly you know. I guess we Caswells are all lucky,
all except my uncle can Field Caswell. That is. Whenever
I had him for a partner. I used to feel
I was living beyond my knees.

Speaker 2 (16:51):
If you don't mind, Deacon, this one is our trick.

Speaker 1 (16:54):
Oh, I beg your pardon. I thought that was my age.
I did have one that kind of resembled it.

Speaker 3 (16:59):
Ten of done your play, Deacon, Mildred played the ten.

Speaker 1 (17:03):
A red one. Huh, missus Clark. I'm awfully afraid I've
messed this hand all up. I don't seem to have
any more red ones left.

Speaker 3 (17:11):
See why why you've got nothing but Trump?

Speaker 1 (17:15):
Is that good? Fair?

Speaker 2 (17:17):
Deacon Josh fair?

Speaker 3 (17:19):
Don't you see, Deacon? All the rest are ours?

Speaker 1 (17:21):
They are? Oh, I guess I'll just never get to
understand this game.

Speaker 3 (17:26):
How much you will exactly? Eighty six dollars?

Speaker 1 (17:29):
Eighty six dollars? Why we've been gambling?

Speaker 3 (17:32):
Not with your luck, Deacon. I'm on, mildrede.

Speaker 2 (17:34):
Let's go goodbye, and thank you so much for helping
us out.

Speaker 1 (17:38):
Deacon. That's all right, met you.

Speaker 3 (17:41):
Well, here's your share of the winnings, Deacon.

Speaker 1 (17:43):
Why, missus Clark, I couldn't touch that money?

Speaker 2 (17:46):
Oh would you much?

Speaker 1 (17:46):
Oh? No, no, no, I couldn't.

Speaker 3 (17:48):
Well it's hardly fair if you say so.

Speaker 1 (17:51):
Well, now maybe I could, that is, if I donate
it to some charity or say the Deacon Caswell Fund,
the Deacon ca Well fun.

Speaker 3 (18:00):
How marvelous your own fun?

Speaker 1 (18:02):
Yes, ma'am, my very own, my person. I'll pick it up.

Speaker 3 (18:07):
Oh, it's all.

Speaker 1 (18:08):
Right, notes paying up your debts, missus.

Speaker 3 (18:12):
Clark, Well, not exactly. I he's mister Cunningham one note
to cover the whole amount three thousand dollars.

Speaker 1 (18:19):
Oh, I guess he's the same mister Cunningham who's going
to promote the price fight. Huh. Yes, quite a busy
man in this town, isn't he?

Speaker 3 (18:27):
Yes?

Speaker 1 (18:27):
Why? Oh, nothing only My uncle Phoeneus once said, if
you try to pick all the flowers, you're bound to
get some poison. Ivy. I've just heard Act one of

(18:48):
Alias the Deacon with Bob Burns and Helen Wood. While
we're waiting for mister Demil to present Act too, let's
talk about vacations.

Speaker 6 (18:56):
What are you going to do for your vacation, Sally?

Speaker 2 (18:58):
I'm thinking of flying to New York.

Speaker 1 (19:00):
Hmm, how exciting. I suppose you're thinking a lot about clothes.

Speaker 6 (19:03):
Aren't you.

Speaker 2 (19:04):
Oh, I've got everything planned.

Speaker 6 (19:05):
What are you taking?

Speaker 1 (19:06):
Well?

Speaker 7 (19:08):
Half a pound of underthings and ounce of stockings, three
pounds of dress?

Speaker 5 (19:11):
Ye?

Speaker 6 (19:12):
Hey, have you lost your mind? What do you mean?

Speaker 1 (19:14):
Half a pound of underthings three pounds of dresses.

Speaker 7 (19:18):
That's the way you pack, pereer travel by the pounds,
you know.

Speaker 1 (19:22):
I can't help thinking thinking what how easy it would
be to tuck a box of new quick Lucks Flakes
into your bag.

Speaker 6 (19:28):
It's mighty handy to have when you want to freshen
up your things.

Speaker 7 (19:30):
By mister Ruck, I always travel with New Quick Luck.
It's so easy to give my underthings or blouses or
dresses a.

Speaker 2 (19:36):
Quick tip in the studs.

Speaker 6 (19:37):
And it means you don't have to take along so
many things, doesn't it.

Speaker 1 (19:40):
That's right.

Speaker 7 (19:40):
I take a few and freshen them off, and with
New Quick Lucks it's a grand way to stay fresh
and dainty.

Speaker 1 (19:46):
You know, that's a good tip for all our listeners
who are planning vacations. Travel light and take along a
box of Lux Flakes as you're dating. This insurance Lux
removes every trace of perspiration from your washables and protect
you against.

Speaker 7 (19:58):
Offending Sunday should be Lucky after every wearing blouses, dresses
and accessories, often especially during warm weather.

Speaker 1 (20:05):
New Quick Lucks is so easy to use, so fast
in water as cool as your hand. They dissolve three
times as fast as any of ten other leading soaps tested,
and New Quick Lucks is thrifty to use too. Ounce
for ounce, it gives you more SuDS than the other
soaps tested.

Speaker 6 (20:22):
Even in hard water.

Speaker 1 (20:24):
Fast thrifty and safe for everything safe in water alone.
That means stockings, under things and all your washable dresses.
Ask for new quick Lucks tomorrow in the generous large box.
It comes in the same familiar package and costs no more.
Now our producer mister de Bill Act too of alias

(20:44):
The Deacon, starring Bob Burns as the Deacon, with Helen
Wood as Phyllis, who the quiet little town of Shelton
is proving a gold mine for the amiable Deacon. For
a gentleman so unfamiliar with Bridge, his luck is astounding,
and slowly but surely, his partner, Missus Clark, is winning

(21:05):
back all she lost through the Deacon's influence. Phyllis is
now employed as a waitress in the Clark Hotel. From
breakfast to dinner, she's on her feet, but she's never
too tired at night to go walking with Johnny Sloan.
On this evening, their walker's taking them to the outskirts
of the town. At last, in the bright moonlight, Johnny
comes to a halt right at the edge of a

(21:25):
junk yard. Well, here it is the list.

Speaker 6 (21:29):
There's what a junkyard?

Speaker 1 (21:30):
How do you like it?

Speaker 2 (21:31):
Well, it's very pretty.

Speaker 6 (21:33):
I admit it doesn't look like much, but I can
buy it cheap.

Speaker 2 (21:35):
Buy it, Johnny, Maybe we better sit down and rest.
You've been working too hard.

Speaker 6 (21:40):
The idea is quicker than the eye.

Speaker 1 (21:41):
Lady.

Speaker 6 (21:41):
You see all those uttle recks. I can salvage all
the junk parts and start a little supply shop strictly secondhand.

Speaker 3 (21:46):
Oh I see, I'll.

Speaker 6 (21:47):
Sell it for two hundred and fifty dollars. All I'm
sure is two hundred and forty.

Speaker 2 (21:51):
I wish I could help you, you can.

Speaker 6 (21:52):
I sure planning things out is fun, but well, it's
more fun if you do it with someone. You feel
that way too.

Speaker 2 (21:59):
Yes, I do.

Speaker 6 (22:00):
Well if I get the business started and things look better.

Speaker 2 (22:03):
I yes, Johnny.

Speaker 6 (22:05):
Maybe you don't want to hear any more of.

Speaker 2 (22:06):
This, but I do a whole lot more.

Speaker 6 (22:08):
And get hold of yourself, because I got an awful
lot to tell you about us.

Speaker 2 (22:13):
Hey, what's the matter?

Speaker 6 (22:15):
I just happen to think you know? I don't even
know your last name.

Speaker 1 (22:27):
How about the haircut this morning?

Speaker 6 (22:29):
Did you fix up hole spruce?

Speaker 1 (22:30):
No, just finished with the shave, Andre, and don't make
it too close.

Speaker 6 (22:34):
Oh, don't worry about me. I haven't cut a customer
over a week.

Speaker 1 (22:38):
You know, the barber down home used to deduct a
penny every time he cuts somebody. You know, it was
nothing to see a customer leave his shop a dime.
Winter say, how's the chef getting along with his gambling cruise?
Saying oh, fine, fine, no more gambling in this town.
Well that's almost too bad in a way. What do
you mean. I understand some people find a lot of
pleasure in a friendly game of cards.

Speaker 6 (22:58):
Geekon you eat one of those people?

Speaker 1 (23:00):
Oh no, no, no. I always remember what my uncle
Confucius Caswell used to say. Cards have either a bee
or a bicycle on their backs. That means if you
play with them, you either get stung or taken for
a ride. Well, good morning, mister Cunningham.

Speaker 6 (23:15):
I've been looking for you, Deacon.

Speaker 9 (23:16):
What's the idea of your steaming up the Ladies League
against holding the fight?

Speaker 6 (23:19):
I don't like it.

Speaker 1 (23:20):
Well, to tell you the truth, brother Cunningham, I didn't
think you would watch that. I'm just on my way
to the Clark Hotel to address a special meeting of
the Ladies League. Now you're not going my way, are you?

Speaker 9 (23:30):
I certainly am not. No, Listen, Deacon, if you don't
stop shooting off your mouth about things that don't concern.

Speaker 1 (23:34):
You, and Brother Cunningham, you do concern me. I remember
what my uncle Confucius used to say. It's wise to
remember that the teeth that smile also bite.

Speaker 9 (23:44):
Hang your uncle, Confucius. I've got an uncle too, And
he says, a closed mouth catches no flies.

Speaker 1 (23:49):
Hmm. That kind of makes good sense. Look, brother Cunningham, Now,
if you was to make this fight of yours sort
of a part for charity, why I think that had
kind of lift the entire proceedings into something finer, more esthetic.
Now there's one little charity that's kind of in debt
about three thousand dollars. You know anything about it?

Speaker 9 (24:09):
You're not getting a quarter out of me or any
information either. Remember what my uncle said?

Speaker 1 (24:14):
All right, brother Cunningham, and if you see your uncle
you might tell him what my uncle said. He said
that smart people always do in the beginning what Darren
Fool's finally do in the end. Now, if you'll excuse me,
the ladies are waiting. Good morning, Brother Cunningham.

Speaker 4 (24:39):
And now, ladies, I am proud to present our esteemed
guest and speaker, the good Deacon.

Speaker 1 (24:45):
Caswell, Thank you, ladies, thank you, ladies. My my, what
a wonderful gatherer, I declare, I don't believe I've ever
seen so many bright and intelligent faces, but as intelligent
as I'm sure you. I think I should take a
few minutes to explain the subject of this meeting, just
in case there might be one sister among you that

(25:06):
doesn't quite understand it. I'm reminded of one such case
that happened in my hometown. It seems the Ladies Auxiliary
discovered they had a surplus of one hundred and forty
dollars in the church treasury, and they called a meeting
of the congregation to vote on whether or not they
would spend sixty seven dollars for a new chandelier for
the church. They put it to a vote, and everyone
agreed except one man. That was my own Grandpa Snazzy.

(25:30):
Everybody surrounded him and they says, Snazzy, we ought to
make this unanimous. What are your objections to buying this
chandelier for the church? Grandpa Snazzy says, it's the silliest
thing I ever heard of, Just like throwing sixty seven
dollars in the fire, he says, after you bought the chandelier.
They ain't a soul in town can play one of
the darned things. But ladies, ladies, we're here today to

(25:53):
discuss bringing something to this town that's far more important
than that, and that lady's is reformed. Thank you, ladies.
That's why I've chosen to speak to you today on
the evils of prize fighting. It isn't prize fighting alone
that's objectionable. It's the element it brings to your fair
city after all of.

Speaker 3 (26:16):
Johnny, come outside quick, all right, right away?

Speaker 2 (26:20):
What's the matter, Johnny? If something happened?

Speaker 1 (26:22):
Well what I said?

Speaker 2 (26:25):
Hello, Johnny? Is that all you wanted?

Speaker 1 (26:27):
Sure? Why?

Speaker 2 (26:29):
I thought it was something important? Well?

Speaker 6 (26:31):
I'm important, adn't I?

Speaker 2 (26:32):
Yes? But well I thought you had some news about
the garage.

Speaker 1 (26:36):
I have what I.

Speaker 6 (26:37):
Made three dollars this morning, fiction a fellow's car. Now
all I need is two hundred and thirty seven.

Speaker 3 (26:42):
Johnny, I'm crazy, john Yay? Really, what's the matter with you?

Speaker 1 (26:48):
Boy?

Speaker 4 (26:48):
Am I happy? Troubles come home to roost an Old
Cunningham and his peals.

Speaker 6 (26:52):
From the Little cuss, aren't you?

Speaker 3 (26:53):
Now?

Speaker 4 (26:53):
With those guys? I ain't seeing that price fights low
oubtackles may clear down to my heel. You mean the
fights all it will be unless they can get a
substitute for not gout Blake. He's in the clinker.

Speaker 1 (27:03):
You mean in jail.

Speaker 4 (27:05):
Well, what did I just say? I heard him inside.
They're trying to dig up a substitute.

Speaker 6 (27:09):
Will they pay him?

Speaker 2 (27:10):
Sure if they can.

Speaker 6 (27:12):
Find one, Willie, I think they've got one right now.
Come here. I got a great idea. We into that
room and tell him. You know, fellos got.

Speaker 5 (27:19):
To go on.

Speaker 8 (27:20):
I put a lot of money into this thing, I know,
mister Cunningham, But is it off?

Speaker 6 (27:23):
Well if Blake gets pinched? Hey, hey, you know what
I think?

Speaker 1 (27:26):
What what I think?

Speaker 6 (27:27):
We ought to get a substitute. I ought to hire
somebody to listen to you.

Speaker 4 (27:32):
Oh, cham cham, Oh excuse me, I was looking for
the cham who's the champ? Johnny Sloan?

Speaker 1 (27:41):
Johnny Sloan? Is he a fighter?

Speaker 4 (27:43):
Is he? Say? Only over at the gas station told
me Johnny wants knocked at a guy bigger than the bull.

Speaker 5 (27:47):
Here?

Speaker 1 (27:47):
Huh?

Speaker 4 (27:48):
There he is outside?

Speaker 6 (27:50):
Hey, cham, Hello, Willie? Do you call me?

Speaker 1 (27:52):
Oh?

Speaker 6 (27:53):
Come here, gid So you're a Butler. Huh sure sometimes.

Speaker 4 (27:56):
Betler, nothing, he's a killer.

Speaker 6 (27:59):
Well, how'd you like to kill the bull? Maybe? How much? Yeah?

Speaker 4 (28:02):
How much? One hundred dollars, one hundred dollars? Hey champ,
Hey thinks you're still an aperture.

Speaker 6 (28:09):
Sure sounds like it. Well that's an insugn No, I'll
take it easy, take it easy.

Speaker 4 (28:12):
Two fifty, two fifty or nothing.

Speaker 6 (28:14):
Oh, come now, be reasonable, very reasonable. You know money
ain't everything in life.

Speaker 2 (28:18):
Why, well, that's what you're always telling me.

Speaker 9 (28:22):
I'll I'll make it one hundred and fifty and an
extra hundred if you stay the full ten round.

Speaker 6 (28:26):
All right, you got a deal and a fighter.

Speaker 9 (28:28):
M Well, that takes quite a load off my mind.

Speaker 1 (28:31):
Yeah.

Speaker 9 (28:31):
Well, if I was you, I wouldn't get too happy
with that deacon inside there, stirring up the club women
against our little wolves.

Speaker 4 (28:37):
Said deacon. Oh, I can handle him. Yeah, how excuse me,
I'll be right there.

Speaker 1 (28:48):
Man's face for instincts. It encourages gambling. It's that man
of feuding with each other. It brings me Deacon.

Speaker 4 (28:55):
Cared Well, call for Deacon cares Well.

Speaker 1 (28:58):
I'll take it, son, if you'll excuse me, ladies, not.

Speaker 4 (29:03):
Over here, Jacons, What is it?

Speaker 1 (29:04):
Son?

Speaker 4 (29:05):
Listen, Deacons, You've gotta cut out this anti fight stuff.

Speaker 1 (29:08):
Oh, I'm afraid I can't. Son, I can't explain just now.

Speaker 4 (29:11):
But Johnny's gonna fight. He's gonna get two fifty four.
He needs the money badly, Deacons. You see, without it,
him and Phillis can't get married.

Speaker 1 (29:19):
Oh well, that's too bad. But I just can't get
out of this right now. I just can't.

Speaker 4 (29:22):
No, all right, Deacons, Remember the day I took your
bag upstairs for you?

Speaker 3 (29:28):
Yes, well, it fell open.

Speaker 4 (29:30):
There was six packs of cards in it.

Speaker 1 (29:33):
No, yes, oh I see, I see. Well. Now, now
maybe I can do something after all.

Speaker 4 (29:40):
Sure you can't, Deacons and a boy, yes.

Speaker 1 (29:43):
Sir, my dear ladies, ladies, I believe I've discussed one
side of this question pretty thorough, But like all subjects,
there are two sides to it.

Speaker 5 (29:54):
Now.

Speaker 1 (29:54):
Where was I Oh, yes, yes, yes, I was discussing
the evils of price fighting. Fighting is horrible, but prize
fighting is also a form of athletics, and athletics is
what builds our children into strong, healthy citizens. We don't
want our boys to be strong and healthy, do it well,
and we want him to be strong and healthy, don't

(30:14):
we Why? Of course we do, and the man we
are of self defense will help them to be. And
that's why, ladies, I'm telling you now, anyone who opposes
prize fighting in this community is a traitor to her country.

Speaker 9 (30:36):
Johnny?

Speaker 2 (30:36):
Is it almost time?

Speaker 1 (30:38):
Almost?

Speaker 6 (30:39):
That's the last preliminary up there now.

Speaker 2 (30:40):
Johnny, I just can't stay and watch the fighter. I'm
going back to the hotel.

Speaker 6 (30:45):
Okay, I'll be there in the all. We'll send the
rest of the night just counting that. Dell.

Speaker 1 (30:49):
Oh, young sir, what do you want now? Is that friendly?
I just stopped in to see how you're feeling.

Speaker 6 (30:54):
I feel better if you keep away from me.

Speaker 1 (30:56):
You're a jinx or you've got me wrong. Brother, I
hope you not. That both so cold he'll have to
carry him out with a pair of ice tongs.

Speaker 6 (31:03):
Okay, I'll do my best.

Speaker 1 (31:04):
Sounds like you're feeling pretty fit, all right?

Speaker 2 (31:06):
Doesn't he look it?

Speaker 1 (31:07):
Well? I like to know these things because while the
race is not always to the swift, nor the battle
to the strong, it's not a bad way to bed.
Good luck, Johnny.

Speaker 6 (31:16):
Thanks, Okay, longer on, let's get home, all sat saloon,
and so be careful.

Speaker 1 (31:22):
Sure see, if a hotel you a little worried, worried,
a polar.

Speaker 2 (31:27):
Bear'd have to wear a mittence to shake hands with me. Oh,
I hope it works out, do youcing? So much depends
on it.

Speaker 1 (31:33):
Just remember that that dark cloud has got a two
hundred and fifty dollars silver line. Are you run along now?
Don't worry.

Speaker 2 (31:47):
I don't see how he suck it out of ten rounds.

Speaker 1 (31:49):
But he has ten rounds of commible hards.

Speaker 5 (31:51):
But and he's still thinking it a pool to another hard.

Speaker 7 (31:53):
To adore and another one.

Speaker 1 (31:55):
The kids need a bookling he's going down.

Speaker 5 (31:57):
No, no, he won't go down.

Speaker 9 (32:22):
I know he was arking about a loan one take
it or leave it?

Speaker 6 (32:25):
Just a minimuster, Cunningham, you said an extra hundred if
I stuck the full ten rounds.

Speaker 1 (32:29):
Well I stuck to night.

Speaker 9 (32:30):
Yes, you stuck.

Speaker 6 (32:31):
You were out on your feet telling me you were
a fighter. Why you couldn't punch your way out of
a paper bag? All right, then this shouldn't hurt you.
Come on, sheriff.

Speaker 9 (32:47):
We'll probably find him in the hotel.

Speaker 1 (32:48):
Right with you, mister Cunningham. Just a minute, mister Cunningham. Well,
I've known Johnny for years. He wouldn't do a thing
like that.

Speaker 9 (32:54):
Sure, but he did it.

Speaker 6 (32:56):
There he is sheriff.

Speaker 1 (32:58):
Do your duty.

Speaker 6 (32:59):
What's the matter here?

Speaker 2 (33:00):
Is there anything wrong?

Speaker 1 (33:01):
Blan? You're under arrest?

Speaker 2 (33:02):
Why he had a right to hit mister Cunningham.

Speaker 1 (33:04):
Maybe so, But he didn't have a right to steal
his wallet.

Speaker 6 (33:07):
What I didn't take any Wallace.

Speaker 9 (33:08):
You knocked me unconscious in the dressing room. When I
came to, my wallet was gone.

Speaker 6 (33:11):
You stole it. That's a lie, a lie. I suppose
you didn't hit me.

Speaker 1 (33:15):
Oh, sure, he hits you. But that's only half the truth.
And when a man tells only half the truth, brother Cunningham,
is just the same as a lie.

Speaker 9 (33:22):
We let the law decide that a good.

Speaker 1 (33:23):
Sheriff ain't interested in law, he's interested in justice. That
may be right, Deacon, But it looks like I'll have
to take the boy along, all right?

Speaker 6 (33:30):
Do you mind if I can I speak to follows
someone up?

Speaker 1 (33:33):
Sure, I'll be waiting outside. Come on, Deacon, Come on,
mister Cunningham. I don't need you to sway out the worm.

Speaker 2 (33:39):
It'll be a pleasure, Phyllis you shouldn't have done it, Johnny,
even though he promised you then money. You had no
right to take it, but I.

Speaker 6 (33:48):
Didn't take it. You don't really believe I'd do a
thing like that.

Speaker 2 (33:51):
You said you'd go with a share.

Speaker 6 (33:52):
What else can I do? I've told you exactly what happened.
I hit him, walked out, bumped into the deacon and
came right over to see you.

Speaker 2 (33:58):
Bumped into the deacon.

Speaker 6 (33:59):
Yeah, right outside the rushing room door.

Speaker 1 (34:02):
Better come along now, Johnny.

Speaker 6 (34:04):
Okay, don't worry, Phyllis. It'll come out all right.

Speaker 1 (34:09):
So long, Johnny, Philly. I'm awfully sorry about the boys, Phyllis,
but I did the best I could.

Speaker 3 (34:22):
For Yes, I'm sure you did.

Speaker 1 (34:24):
Huh what do you mean by that? You know what
I mean?

Speaker 3 (34:26):
You were right outside the dressing room and Johnny.

Speaker 2 (34:28):
Hit him and knocked him out. Then Johnny left and
you went in.

Speaker 1 (34:32):
Oh, I see you think I did it.

Speaker 2 (34:34):
I know all about you. I had a letter from Truxton.
You were run out of there.

Speaker 4 (34:38):
You may be fooling Missus Clark and a lot of
other innocence around here, but.

Speaker 2 (34:41):
I know you, and the whole town will know you.

Speaker 10 (34:43):
If that wallet isn't returned by tomorrow morning.

Speaker 2 (34:45):
Do you understand tomorrow morning?

Speaker 1 (34:48):
I guess you got a right to think that way
you're thinking now, Phyllis. I've been on the wrong side
of society for a long time, but I've always liked
to believe that I ain't ever been mean, not as
mean as you were making me out to be. I
guess it wouldn't do much good for me to tell
you you're wrong.

Speaker 2 (35:04):
No, it wouldn't.

Speaker 1 (35:05):
I see, all right, miss Pellis, I'll still be around
in the morning. Good night. In just a moment, mister

(35:32):
Demil brings you Act three of Alias the Deacon with
Bob Burns and Helen Wood. During the short intermission, we
bring you our friends the Browning family again. Mother Browning
is returning tonight from a trip, and Dot and Midge
have planned a little surprise for her.

Speaker 2 (35:50):
I've got dinner already, Nidgie.

Speaker 4 (35:52):
You bowed down with the table as soon as my
lightest spoons all around?

Speaker 1 (35:56):
There?

Speaker 2 (35:57):
Doesn't that look?

Speaker 1 (35:57):
Night?

Speaker 2 (35:58):
Divine? My goodness, I bet mother will be surprised. Here
she comes.

Speaker 4 (36:06):
Now, Dad, where are you?

Speaker 2 (36:13):
And the whole?

Speaker 1 (36:13):
Hi?

Speaker 2 (36:14):
My greetings, Mummy, darling, have fun?

Speaker 3 (36:16):
Grand How nice? Everything look, we've got dinner already. All
you have to do is eat, you, darlings. The table
looks lovely. Why what's these surprise surpri see lovely spoons?

Speaker 2 (36:28):
Where did you get there? They're our coming home present
for you?

Speaker 1 (36:31):
How sweet?

Speaker 4 (36:32):
Just think we got six of them, six beautiful tea
spoons for only fifty cent and the top from a
large box of new Lucks Quick Loucks. It's a new
offer the makers of locks Flakes are taking right now.
And look, moms, it's the Allure pattern, just like the
silver we got before, and it's original Roger silver plate.
Doesn't it look lovely with our other silver?

Speaker 3 (36:49):
It looks beautiful there. That pattern's so simple it would
go well with any silver.

Speaker 4 (36:53):
And mother, a whole list of the other pieces we
can get in The Allure pattern came with the spoon
yad and I want to send for the perfectly ducky
beyond nives and four. Oh they're sublime, the cutest short
blades and prongs and long handled n Yes.

Speaker 1 (37:06):
Hundreds of thousands of women have been enthusiastic about the
beautiful Allure pattern, and so many have asked for matching
pieces of this handsome original Rodgers silver plate that the
makers of Lux Flakes, in cooperation with the International Silver Company,
the world's largest silversmith, are offering this amazing bargain once
again so you can get new matching pieces or start
a new set. This new offer brings you six beautiful

(37:29):
teaspoons in the famous Allure pattern, guaranteed original Rogers silver
plate for only fifty cents and the top from a
large box of new quick Lux. Send the large box
top with fifty cents in coin. No stamps please, and
your name and address to Lux Maredon. That's me e
ri d e n Meredon, Connecticut. I'll repeat that address,

(37:52):
It's Lux meredenm e ri d e n Meredon, Connecticut.
This offer is good only in the United States. I'll
tell you more about it after our play. We pause
now for station identification. This is the Columbia Broadcasting System.

(38:28):
The curtain rises on the third act of Alias the Deacon.
It's early the following morning. On the second floor of
the Clark Hotel. Phyllis moves swiftly along the quiet corridor
with a nervous glance over her shoulder. She starts down
the stairs, but suddenly a figure stepped from the shadows,

(38:51):
and mister Sullivan stands in her way.

Speaker 6 (38:55):
Good morning, Phyllis.

Speaker 2 (38:56):
Oh hello, you're up early, mister Sullivan.

Speaker 8 (39:01):
Yes, so are you? Where you been in my room? Yeah,
you weren't a minute ago. You were in Sloan's room.

Speaker 2 (39:06):
I saw you.

Speaker 3 (39:07):
You you're crazy.

Speaker 1 (39:08):
I'm not.

Speaker 8 (39:09):
Maybe a better hand it over, Phyllis and that wallet
you found, but I'm come and I saw it was
under the mattress. You better let me have it.

Speaker 2 (39:16):
No, no, and you won't say anything, Please not me.

Speaker 8 (39:21):
But what about you if they ever put you on
the stand. Your boyfriend sunk, well, you couldn't lie he
did it.

Speaker 2 (39:29):
Well, there's only one thing to do.

Speaker 1 (39:31):
You mean, get out of town.

Speaker 8 (39:32):
Yes, look beautiful, I'd like to help you. There's a
bus leaving at four o'clock.

Speaker 1 (39:37):
We could be on it.

Speaker 6 (39:38):
We could be on sure, you and me.

Speaker 10 (39:41):
Thanks just the same, But I always like to travel alone.

Speaker 1 (39:56):
It's me, missus Clark. I just came from the courthouse. Johnny.
He'll be released just as soon as the papers are filed.

Speaker 3 (40:02):
You're a very persuasive man, Deacon. I never thought i'd
be putting up bail for a criminal.

Speaker 1 (40:07):
That boy is no criminal. Besides helping young love is
kind of.

Speaker 3 (40:11):
Good for you, yes, even if it isn't good for itself.

Speaker 2 (40:14):
Phillis just left town.

Speaker 3 (40:16):
Didn't even want to say goodbye to left town.

Speaker 1 (40:19):
The older I get, the less luck I have figuring
out any kind of woman.

Speaker 3 (40:23):
Oh you must be worn out, deacon. Shall I send
a cup of tea to your room?

Speaker 1 (40:28):
Well, I'd sure like a cup of tea, But being
a bachelor gets kind of lonesome. Maybe we could have
it together.

Speaker 3 (40:35):
Why I think that would be pleasant as could be.

Speaker 1 (40:39):
I should have held it.

Speaker 10 (40:39):
They had no right to let him go.

Speaker 6 (40:41):
I'll take it easy, mister Cunningham.

Speaker 1 (40:43):
Something the matter, mister Cunningham.

Speaker 9 (40:44):
Plenty is the matter that crooked to skip town Johnny Slom.
Somebody put up bail for him, and he skipped town.

Speaker 1 (40:49):
Oh dear, Oh, he wouldn't do that. He must have
gone after Phillies. Somebody must have told him.

Speaker 6 (40:53):
Nevertheless, he's gone.

Speaker 3 (40:54):
This is terrible, mister Cunningham. I put up the hotel
as bail.

Speaker 2 (40:58):
You did what hotel?

Speaker 5 (41:00):
Well?

Speaker 3 (41:00):
I put it up.

Speaker 9 (41:00):
But I counted on this place of security for those loans.

Speaker 6 (41:03):
I why why I'm putting.

Speaker 9 (41:05):
A bail for the man that assaulted me, Elsie, how
could you do a thing like that to me?

Speaker 1 (41:10):
I asked her to You asked her.

Speaker 9 (41:11):
Too, Elsie. Whenever you needed money, you turned to me,
But when it came to using that money, my money,
you had to turn to a stranger, a medal, some
two faced hypocrite. Very well, ask as soon as that
young crooks caught I'm starting suit on.

Speaker 4 (41:23):
My note, but I had six months to pay.

Speaker 9 (41:26):
You had six months. Maybe you didn't notice that the
new note is on demand demand. Perhaps your financial advisor
can straighten this out too.

Speaker 3 (41:35):
Oh, Deacon, Deacon, what am I kind of too?

Speaker 1 (41:38):
I'm sorry, miss Clark. I never thought this would happen,
but everything I own O I uh, I don't think
missus Clark is feeling very well.

Speaker 9 (41:52):
That's surprising when she has you around here to help her. Oh,
missus Gregory was telling me about those little card games, Deacon.

Speaker 6 (42:00):
Very interesting.

Speaker 1 (42:01):
Oh yes, well, I I guess I shouldn't have played
with those ladies, Brother Cunningham, I succumbed to a weakness.
But to tell you the truth, if it wasn't that
I didn't know one card from another, I'd be tempted
to do it again, and that'd be dangerous because I've
got my parish's money in my pocket, twenty five hundred
dollars on tech. Uh huh, yes, mister Sullivan, I got

(42:21):
to be careful. Well, I should say you see, bridge
is a very scientific game. But I'd be perfectly willing
to give you a chance to even up. But let's
say a little draw poker, draw poker. What's that you
don't know? Huh?

Speaker 6 (42:34):
Why we can teach you, can't we mister Cunningham.

Speaker 9 (42:38):
Well, I'm kind of angry at the deacon, but uh,
maybe I was a bit too excitable.

Speaker 1 (42:45):
Well that's mighty swell of your brother, Cunningham.

Speaker 9 (42:48):
Just step into the dining room, Deacon. We'll teach you
no time at all, No diamond.

Speaker 1 (42:55):
Oh let's see, gentlemen, you say, arroyal flish beats everything.

Speaker 9 (43:00):
Catching on fast, digan, come on, let's begin, I'll deal.

Speaker 1 (43:03):
Wait, don't you think I ought to cut the cards?

Speaker 2 (43:06):
Huh?

Speaker 1 (43:06):
Oh, not that I don't trust you, mister Sullivan. Well,
I always say, if you suspect a man, don't play
with him, and if you play with him, don't suspect him. Still,
I think it'd be a little more friendly if I cut.

Speaker 6 (43:17):
Him, sure, we'll even cut for deal.

Speaker 1 (43:19):
Take a card, deacon, Well, now that's downright, brotherly. I
have a seven ten here, I got a king who wins?
Why you do, Deacon? Already? Naturally? Beginner's luck, beginner's luck?
How true, brother, how true? Now let's see. I think
you said five cards to each player? Didn't you? Five cards?

Speaker 5 (43:38):
Deacon?

Speaker 1 (43:39):
Thank you, you're welcome. I'll open for ten.

Speaker 9 (43:42):
Hm damn, eh, all right, I'll stay.

Speaker 1 (43:46):
Let's see. Now that's a lot of money. Ten cents.

Speaker 6 (43:49):
What do you mean ten cents? Ten dollars, ten dollars?

Speaker 9 (43:52):
Just a sociable game, deacon.

Speaker 1 (43:54):
Oh well, I'll play along, just to see what happens.

Speaker 6 (43:57):
Had a boy three cards here and the two for me?

Speaker 1 (44:01):
Three two? I'll just take one. Huh, I pass me too?
Do we lay our hands down? Now, gentlemen, that's.

Speaker 6 (44:08):
Right, hurricanes, I have three twos.

Speaker 1 (44:11):
Let's see. Now aces count as ones, don't they?

Speaker 6 (44:14):
Well, yes they do.

Speaker 1 (44:15):
But then I guess you win, because that's all I
have three little bitty ones.

Speaker 9 (44:20):
Oh oh, well, now that's too bad, Deacon. Better luck
next time.

Speaker 1 (44:26):
Well that's the way I feel, brother, you dear mister Sullivan,
Is it my turn? I'll open also, I guess I
can afford it.

Speaker 6 (44:40):
I'll say you can nine straight pots. You sure picked
the game up fast.

Speaker 1 (44:44):
Thanks to your wonderful tutoring, brother Sullivon.

Speaker 6 (44:46):
I'll bet fifty bucks.

Speaker 1 (44:48):
I'm in well now to give you a chance to
get even that fifty and fifty more.

Speaker 6 (44:53):
Trying to scare me.

Speaker 9 (44:53):
Huh, well, I pass, so do I That guy does
more raising than a rolla blind.

Speaker 1 (45:00):
There's my hand a flush. Brothers all the same color.

Speaker 8 (45:02):
Hey, wait a minute, they're all the same color, and
one of them the time.

Speaker 1 (45:05):
Yes, the oh yes. But but now you gentlemen, threw
your cards away. And when you throw your cards away,
you lose. You told me that yourself, brother Sullivan. Remember
take it, do take it. I'm awfully sorry, brothers. In fact,
I'm tempted to return your money on this way, but
one must never yield to temptation. It's my deal.

Speaker 6 (45:26):
Give me the cards.

Speaker 1 (45:27):
Wonderful game, brother Cunningham. I don't know when I've had
so much fun the last part I won. There'll save
at least one hundred heathens.

Speaker 9 (45:35):
If you save any more heathens, they'll have to chip
in to save me all right?

Speaker 1 (45:39):
All right?

Speaker 6 (45:40):
Who opens?

Speaker 1 (45:40):
Who opens? Oh? Yes, yes, I'll bet twenty dollars.

Speaker 6 (45:43):
I'm in.

Speaker 9 (45:44):
I'll stay two. How many cards, Deacon?

Speaker 1 (45:47):
Well, now I'll take four. Four, that's fine. Two here,
two and two for the dealer, Brother Cunningham, Is it
correct to deal from the bottom of the day?

Speaker 6 (46:00):
Didn't deal from the bottle?

Speaker 1 (46:01):
I didn't say you did. I just asked if it
was correct.

Speaker 6 (46:04):
Oh, played the game? Play the game.

Speaker 1 (46:06):
I'll bet one hundred dollars.

Speaker 9 (46:07):
Okay, okay, I'm in a honey dah, all right, and
i'll raise that two hundred.

Speaker 1 (46:13):
I'll raise that another two hundred.

Speaker 6 (46:15):
I'm out, and I'll see that and throw in another
two hundred.

Speaker 1 (46:18):
My goodness, how much money is in that part? Brother?
Over one thousand dollars? Ain't it?

Speaker 9 (46:22):
Thirteen hundred and sixty?

Speaker 1 (46:25):
Have you got that much? Cage?

Speaker 9 (46:26):
Well, I got missus Clark's note.

Speaker 6 (46:29):
Is that good enough?

Speaker 1 (46:30):
But lay it down? Brother? What would you do with
this hand? Brother Solivon?

Speaker 8 (46:34):
Listen, if I knew as little about cards as you,
I'd write a book on it.

Speaker 1 (46:38):
Oh well, i'll see it, Brother Cunningham.

Speaker 6 (46:41):
Right, three kings I win?

Speaker 1 (46:44):
Oh yes, a minute, brother, Cunningham, I've got a full house. What, Deacon,
your cheating brother Cunningham? How could you say that?

Speaker 9 (46:50):
Because I know what cards I dealt you?

Speaker 6 (46:52):
Why, brother Funny.

Speaker 9 (46:55):
Sole a mistake?

Speaker 1 (46:56):
You see? I ull right? All right?

Speaker 6 (47:00):
You in the act.

Speaker 1 (47:00):
What is this, Sheriff. I just got word that there's
a card sharp in this room.

Speaker 6 (47:04):
That certainly is an azure man Jim Cunningham. Oh sure,
he just admitted he was cheating.

Speaker 1 (47:10):
Oh please give him another chance, Sheryl.

Speaker 2 (47:12):
What's going on here?

Speaker 1 (47:13):
Oh, missus Clark. Mister Cunningham has just donated this note
of yours to the Caswell thought.

Speaker 3 (47:19):
You mean he's not going to sue?

Speaker 1 (47:22):
I'm afraid not? Are your brother?

Speaker 9 (47:24):
No?

Speaker 6 (47:24):
No, certainly not.

Speaker 3 (47:26):
Oh Deacon, how can I thank you?

Speaker 2 (47:30):
I could just kiss you?

Speaker 1 (47:32):
Well that's a pretty good way. But there's one thing more,
mister Cunningham. Just what were the denominations of the bills
stolen from your walk?

Speaker 9 (47:39):
Four one hundred dollar bills brand New?

Speaker 1 (47:42):
That's strange. They tally exactly what the bills mister Sullivan donated.

Speaker 6 (47:46):
So what are you trying to do?

Speaker 8 (47:47):
Pin it on me?

Speaker 6 (47:48):
Why Phyllis even found a wallet in his room?

Speaker 1 (47:50):
I guess she did all right after you put it
there last night. Crazy maybe so, But I ain't blind.
If you didn't put it there, then how did you
get those bills?

Speaker 5 (47:58):
Well?

Speaker 6 (47:59):
I can explain that.

Speaker 1 (48:01):
You will explain it down at the jail. Come on, now,
wait a minute, shut up, Oh, Deacon, it just occurred
to me. Remember that other card sharp I was telling
you about. Oh, yes, well, I think I know who
he is. I guess he'll be gone though over the
time I tend to these birds. Oh, I'm sure he will.
Good morning, Sheriff, Deacon, Hey deacon, Hello, Willie.

Speaker 4 (48:30):
Where you going with that group at this time?

Speaker 1 (48:32):
Of Nuh, I'm leaving town, Willy.

Speaker 2 (48:35):
What for?

Speaker 1 (48:36):
Well, it's kind of a long story, something to do
with those six decks of cards you found? Remember, Yeah,
but do you have to go? I guess I do.
Good luck Son, Well, so long, good luck? Hellow Deacon. Well,
if it ain't Johnny, Sloan and.

Speaker 2 (48:56):
Phillis, we've been waiting here to see you.

Speaker 1 (48:58):
I knew you didn't run away, John I.

Speaker 6 (49:00):
Just will left to fill us. When I got back,
I found this in my room. It's indeed to that
property I wanted.

Speaker 1 (49:05):
Is that so?

Speaker 6 (49:06):
And I know who put it there and who paid
for it.

Speaker 1 (49:09):
Thanks, Deacon, Oh forget it or else go, Thank brother Cunningham.
It was really his money.

Speaker 3 (49:17):
Deacon, Deacon, I just found out why mister Cunningham one
of this hotel.

Speaker 1 (49:21):
You don't say, I bid he thinks his oil on
his property or something.

Speaker 3 (49:26):
Well, yes he does, and there is too. I've just
been speaking to a man from one of the big
companies oil.

Speaker 2 (49:32):
Oh, why missus Cork.

Speaker 6 (49:33):
That's wonderful.

Speaker 3 (49:34):
Deacon.

Speaker 2 (49:34):
You did all this?

Speaker 6 (49:35):
Oh listen, I did, you certainly did, and I'm ashamed
of the wrong way I had you paid. Deacon.

Speaker 1 (49:40):
Well, I'm glad you changed your mind about me anyway, Johnny.
You see, my uncle Sankie always used to say that
the only people that ever change is the mind or
them that hasn't. Well, I'll be getting on, Deacon.

Speaker 2 (49:53):
You aren't leaving. Oh you can't leave now.

Speaker 1 (49:56):
Oh, I'm afraid I got to Elsie, But it ain't
a permanent pardon. I got a few things to take
care of and little thinkin to do. When that's all over,
I'll be comin back because I sure like this town
and the people in it. Well, so long, folks, Good luck.

(50:33):
We bring to a close our performance of Alias the Deacon.
In a moment, mister de Mill returns with Bob Burns.
But first I want to tell you more about our
spectacular new offer. Right now, for a limited time, you
can get six beautiful teaspoons in the same handsome allure
pattern we've offered before. And you can get all six
spoons for only fifty cents and the top from a

(50:56):
large sized box of new Quack lux flakes. Why that's
less than nine cents a spoon. It's a great value,
a marvelous bargain. Every single piece is original Roger's silver plate,
made by the International Silver Company, the world's largest silversmiths.
That name stands for guaranteed quality. As a matter of fact,
a written guarantee comes with the silver and says, in part.

Speaker 11 (51:19):
Every piece of silverware bearing the name William Rodgers's manufacturing
Company is guaranteed to give satisfaction in family use and
will be replaced without charge at any time it is
not conformed to this guaranteed.

Speaker 1 (51:31):
That's it a guaranteed quality and beautiful workmanship. Besides, the
Alloa pattern is a delicate wheat motif which is truly stunning, rich, graceful,
and so simple it will harmonize with other silver patterns
you already have.

Speaker 2 (51:45):
How do I get these six teaspoons, mister Ruick, It's
very easy.

Speaker 1 (51:48):
First, buy the thrifty large sized box of lucks. When
you buy it, ask your dealer for the handy order
blank or just send your name and address and the
top from your large box of new Quake Lucks with
fifty desens in coin no stamps please to Lux Meriden.

Speaker 6 (52:04):
That's m E.

Speaker 1 (52:05):
R I D E N meredon Connecticut and you'll receive
your six teaspoons promptly.

Speaker 2 (52:10):
Can I get as many sets as I like, mister.

Speaker 1 (52:12):
Ulick, You certainly can, but for each extra set, be
sure to send another fifty cents and another large box top.
With the spoons, you'll get a full list of all
the other pieces available in the Allure pattern, including the
smart new vond knife and fork. Now remember you can't
buy this Illure pattern in any store. It's exclusive with

(52:32):
the makers of Lux Flakes. So send for your six
teaspoons right away. Mail the top from a large box
of Lucks with fifty cents in coin and your name
and address to Lux Meriden. That's m E r I
d E n Meriden, Connecticut. This offer is good only
in the United States. Here's mister dei Mill with our star.

(52:54):
The Deacon is looking for new fields to conker, but
the man who made him real to night is right
here at our microphone. Bob Buns, thank you, mister de Mill.
I want to tell you I enjoy coming to Deluxe
Radio Theater. You always say such nice things about my acting. Well,
bye bye, I hope it was acting now, mister de Mill,
I don't want people to think if they come over
to my house to play old Maid, I'm going to

(53:15):
deal from the bottom of the deck. You know, when
we is rehearsing the other day, I got to thinking
about my uncle Fudd. That's exactly what we've been waiting for,
a Bob, for something to remind you of your uncle Fudd. Well,
now you may not know this, mister de Mill, but
he's my poker playing uncle. You know, he just wants
to play poker all the time, but he never wins.
The last time I was down in van Bjorn, Uncle

(53:37):
Fudd asked me to go along with him to a
poker game. Well, I didn't get into the game, but
I watched, and I want to tell you, mister de Mill,
it was awful the things they is doing to Uncle Fudd.
Why they dealt from every part of the deck but
the top. Well. I finally took Uncle Fudd out there
after he'd lost thirty five or forty cents, and I
said to him, I says, Uncle Fudd, this game is crooked.

(53:58):
They've been cheating you. He said you, yes, Robin, I
know it is. They've been cheating me right along. I says, well,
what do you keep going back for? And he says, well, Robin,
ain't nothing I can do about it. It's the only
poker game in town. Uncle Fudd's philosophy is certainly refreshing.
I hope your relatives don't start that game on Monday

(54:18):
nights until our play is over. Oh, what's your show
going to be next Monday night, missus de Mill. We're
going to have one of the great actresses of our
time or any other time in the Lux Radio Theater
next Monday night, Miss Helen Hayes. Our play is the
delightful comedy by Mark Connolly and George S. Kaufman to
the Ladies with Helen Hayes. We'll have Otto Krueger, and

(54:39):
they'll both be heard in the same parts they played
in the Broadway production. And I say fair warning that
after hearing through the ladies, you can never doubt that
the hand that wields the skillet is the hand that
rules the world. Well, sir, I'm going fishing, but I'll
take a radio long so I can hear that. Good night,
mister Demill, Good night Bob, come back with some train,

(55:00):
say Charles. Our sponsors, the makers of Lux Flakes, join
me in inviting you to be with us again next
Monday night, when the Lux Radio Theater presents Helen Hayes
and Otto Kruger.

Speaker 6 (55:15):
In to the Ladies, the Sucessful by.

Speaker 1 (55:18):
De Mel saying good night to you from Holly World.

(55:41):
May I remind you, ladies and gentlemen, the American Red
Cross is appealing to all Americans for contributions to help
the thousands of suffering women, children, and aged in war
ridden Europe. More help is needed, and now show your
sympathy by sending a contribution to your local Red Cross chapter.
Heard in tonight's play where Fred Mackay as Johnny Dwaine

(56:04):
Thompson as Missus Clark, Lou Merrill as Cunningham, Arthur K.
Bryan as Sullivan, Griff Barnett as Sheriff, Bobby Winkler as
Willie Ralth, Sudan as Andre while A. Mayer as Bull,
Martha Wentworth as Missus Greggory, Celeste Brush as Missus Howley,
Maxine March as Mildred Gregory, Edward Marr as station Master,
and Warren Ash as police Chief. Bob Burns will soon

(56:27):
be seen on the screen in the Paramount picture Coming
Round the Mountain. He appeared to Night to the courtesy
of the Craft Music Hall. Bob has asked us to
let you know that k m H will go on
the air one hour earlier this Thursday. Our music was
directed by Lewis Silvers and you're announcer has been Melvill Ruwick.

(56:53):
This is the Columbia gorodcasting system.