June 14, 2023 • 39 mins
Eric and Bre are able to help thousands of other married couples around the world who were just like them to become healed, restored, & saved from the brink of divorce! As well as teach them how to develop a happy, healthy, & successful marriage through Christian principles. They are able to do that through their Marriage Podcast called Married With Autism.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:08):
Ce Be Supremes. Welcome to themarrit with Autism Podcast, a podcast as
designed to help neuro diapert and neurotypicalcouples, quote married and single learn how
to develop a happy, healthy ata set of amriage and Christmas trip supple.
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at gmail dot com to obtain moreinformation. Well, good even, guys,
(01:42):
we are back. Cannot wait toget into this topic tonight. You
know, I figure we do justsomething different tonight, because you know,
so the podcast is about marriage ofcourse, especially with autism. But tonight
at as figure we would just gowith this article tonight that actually I ended
up seeing earlier today and it triggeredsomething in me. But I was like,
(02:06):
ooh, this would be something goodto talk about tonight, even with
my husband and with you guys.And so we're gonna talk about this tonight.
We're gonna get into this tonight.So just one, like I said,
welcome everyone to Marry with Autism.I'm your host. One of your
hosts, right prophet is Free SmithPata Eric Smith. Yeah, and we
are getting into this topic tonight.So y'all know how we do. Before
(02:30):
we even start, We're gonna goahead and pray and then we're gonna jump
right into the article. And thenwe're gonna jump into the conversation. All
right. So amen, hey babe, let us pray evning. Father,
we just come to you tonight.Lord. We just first and foremost thank
you God. Thank you for yourgoodness God. Thank you for keeping us
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the whole day. God. Thankyou for giving us the strength to go
through the day. God, andthank you for being our God and being
the God of the universe. Soright now, Father God, I just
thank you and I glorify you forwhat you have done, all that you
are doing right now and the miraclesthat are to come. God. So
give us this day, God,as the says in the Lord's prayer,
(03:12):
give us this day our daily brand, and allow us to forgive those who
have done wrong against us, aswe forgive those who trespass against us.
And I just thank you God thatyou are keeping you keep us delivered from
evil. You give us the strengththe fight the enemy and the strongholds that
you know try to come our way, but those strongholds are just broken down
and they just fall down to theto the ground in your name God.
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So right now, Father God,we just thank you for you being a
mighty God and being the God ofpower and authority, and thank you for
giving us the power and authority totrampo over serpents and scorpions. God.
And let tonight's prayer message in thisarticle w be like convicting one way or
another, and let it be apoint of growth God. And for every
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mayor's that that you know, watchesyou know, and for those that are
desired to be married God. Sowe just love you, we glorify you,
and we honor you in advance.God, that's in your name,
we do pray. Amen, Amen, all right. And so here is
the article and so so it saysAlabama man brutally beats teen daughter for revealing
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extra marital affair. Okay, allright, it says an Alabama man was
arrested for brutally beating his teenage daughterfor revealing his extra marital affair. The
fourteen year old girl fled to aneighbor's house, covered in obvious injuries.
According to Franklin County Sheriff's deputies whofound Christopher and I cannot pronounce the man's
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name or child, whoever it is, It was hiding in a bedroom closet
in the family's trailer home with selfinflicted cuts on his arms and waits.
The rest ofville home was in adisarray, and deputies found the televisi didn't
have been destroyed. Laptop computers werecrushed and ripped apart, kitchen items were
scattered, and furniture clothing from thechildren's bedrooms were thrown from the inside,
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and a second child was hiding ina closet. The victim told investigator she
had told her mother that the thirtyyear old thirty nine year old had a
secret social media account and she suspectedhe was having an affair, and her
father beat her when he found out. The girl said her father punched her,
shruck her with a shower curtain rodand a piece of wood, shoved
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her to the floor, slapped her, and through beerd bottles and other items
at her. Her father told herto clean up the mess, but she
ran out of the off the kitchendoor when she went to get trash bags.
And the man was charged with firstdegree domestic violence, assault, child
abuse, and first degree domestic violence. And so there's a lot to really
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I'm packing this. That's why Ikind of wanted to bring this out.
I think this is a good topicthat was touching on there's a lot of
good points tonight be first and foremost. Y'all know a lot of people in
my background. Some people don't.I grew up in an abusive household.
I've seen what abuse us to families. I've seen my mother be abused.
Like I said, I was abusedmy father. Don't hate the man,
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really do love my father. Butit took a long time to get to
this point of healing. And aswell as my father witnessing my father have
another have an extra murderal affair andhave another child on my mother while they
were married. And so that isa lot on a family. But nevertheless,
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I want to say that it isnever appropriate, and I think this
is where we have to I don'tcare if you're a man or a woman.
The fact of the matter is whenGod put together family, when he
created, when he put together aman and a woman, and you guys
came together and created kids, right, a family, right, family's birth
nations right. There's purpose within family. And when you have to understand that
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when you have children, parents aregatekeepers over their children's souls, over their
children's spirits, right over their developmentand things like that. And so it
is vitally important that as you beginto raise your children, you raise them
in the way that they should go, so when they get older that you
do not depart from that wisdom.Right. But it's just a shame to
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read this article and you see aman who gets mad, so mad at
his daughter that because she exposes himfor stepping out on the mother, right,
because he wanted to have his cakeand eat it too. But you
took all that pain the child thatyou brought into the world, the child
that you were responsible or and youbegin to beat this child. And I
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guess for me, you know,of course, like I said, being
a child that was abused, itwas like I could almost resonate with that
because I remember there were times wheremy parents would have arguments, and I'm
the person that's getting a lot ofthe of the of the brunt force trauma
or I would you know, I'mgetting I'm getting the abuse, right,
I'm getting the backlash from whatever situationhas transpired between them. And it may
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not have nothing to do with me, but I'm being the scapegoat in that
moment of the rage, right,And I don't believe that's ever appropriate.
I don't care if you're a manor a woman who's doing that to the
point where you want to take allthat out on your child instead of learning
to take full responsibility for the actionsthat you've taken. But see a lot
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of people they don't know how toface the truth. They want to do
all they dirt, They want todo all they dirt, They want to
do all this stuff that they're doing, but they wanted to remain hidden.
And we know that who who doesthat. That's stating darkness never wants to
come to light. Darkness always wantsto remain hidden and secretive and doing all
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this stuff. But that is notright. And like I said, I'm
I just I cannot stand it.I do not like to see people victimized
or do not like to see peoplebeing hurt or taken advantage of or whatever
because you feel like, oh,well, you you need to stay in
a child's place or whatever. Butit was like you decided that you wanted
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to step out and do this tothis woman, and you think that that
child's not gonna say something because youthey dad or you they mom, like
they come on, we gotta,we gotta, we gotta get past this.
If you're gonna be a family,then be a family, you know
what I mean. Like I said, it can go, It can go
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so deep. And I understand howeverybody's call to marriage because there's some people
that never need to marry, andthere's some people that never need to pro
create either, and they have procreated. But nevertheless, it does not
justify you getting to the point ofyou want to verb that you want to
assault your own child. So anotherpoint, I'm gonna let my husband kind
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of speak on that for a littlebit and then jump into some more of
this. Yeah, just reading thearticle and first began with him. He
had some deep rooted issues that heneeded to address within himself, and he
was so scared to address it himselfor come face to face with the man
in the mirror. If he wouldhave just manned up and said, Hey,
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I got this issue I'm facing withor I'm cheating on my wife or
whatever it is, and I can'thave stop this lust of women outside of
my marriage. Like if he wouldhave manned up and said, hey,
I need help right here, thenhe could have prevented all that you know
stuff from happening. He could init, you know, first, the
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extra marital affair and then he wouldhave prevented the property damage and the abuse
that he put on his on oneof his own offspring. So for for
him, you're not a real man, and I'm but I just got to
be saved. Save for what itis. I'm just gonna say, for
what it is, I'm not gonnashy away from it. Like he wasn't
a real man, didn't didn't takeresponsibility for his own actions, for his
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own dirt. And if he,if he would have said, hey,
I need help in these areas likeand spoken to his wife to work it
out, and you know, evenat another time spoke to his daughter or
I don't know if they have anyother kids and be like, hey,
you know, daddy has some issueshe he got to work out. Know
that, you know, I loveyou. We're still a family, because
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no families stick together. Number oneand number two. You know, as
the man, you're like, asmen, we're made to not just lead
our households, but protect and coverour How our households are, our wives
are, our children. Where thebackground like the society. I know a
lot a lot of times as men, there's a lot of things on our
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shoulders. But at the same time, we still got to press on and
do what you know, the mostHigh God has called us to do,
as you know, the men ofthe house. And to me, I
mean, I'm not bashing, I'mjust speaking it for what it is.
And this is just hear me bythe spirit right here, This is just
this is just another excuse of youknow, neglecting your responsibilities. And you
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know, as men, we're youknow, being responsible and taking accountability for
things in this society. It isnot it's not praised on. But I'm
gonna tell tell the world this righthere and right now. As men,
I don't care what skin color youare, how old you are, whatever
you are, wherever you follow uponany of those things, we have a
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more more right to you know,take responsibility for our own actions and to
God, to God, our families, because if we don't, who else
will. Right And see, alot of times people don't understand what you're
doing. And this is what Ihad to learn in my own marriage,
right because I saw the abuse,I saw the type of language that was
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being used in the relationship. Isaw these things. See, parents don't
understand because my mother would always tellthis to me growing up. And I
love you mom, if you're listeningto this, but it's the truth,
do as I say, not asI do. But see that contradicts itself
because a lot of times kids modelthe behavior of their parents. So if
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you're cursing all the time, youmore than likely your kids gonna grow up
and be a curser. I'm sorry. If you're fighting people, your kids
don't grow up and be a fighter. I mean, if you out there
lusting and having sex with all thesepeople, and then you wonder why your
teenagers lusting and having sex with allthese people in the door, it's because
they saw you do it. Ifyou're a man and you're in the household
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and you're beating that that child,that little boy or little girl's mother,
then your son is probably nine timesout of teen and is gonna grow up
and beat women because in their mindthey think that it's okay, But it's
not okay. It is not okay. And then you got to think too.
If you are a daughter and she'sseeing her mom being be so in
her mind she thinking, oh yeah, oh yeah, that's what love is.
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Love is for my man to cussme out and put his hands on
me and to dog me out.And that's what love is. So when
a good man comes, I'm nothe laying he is he that I can't
I can't do that, can he? Lamb? But really, baby,
you broken, you traumatized because younever got the healing that you needed because
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you saw this this function that wenton in your family. But that's never
how God intended for that relationship tolook like, because the relationship the Mayor
Ridge was supposed to reflect that ofChrist and so in the church. But
I also have to understand that alot of people are saved, so they're
not gonna understand that concept. Butstill I just I'm sorry, but not
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sorry. At the same time,like to me, it's never an excuse
to sit there and put your handson your child, on your wife or
whatever, because you cannot take personalresponsibility for your actions. And a lot
of people don't know how to dothat. But then again, I think
it comes with a certain level ofemotional intelligence. You have to have a
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certain level of emotional intelligence. Butif you're not right up here, of
course everything else is not gonna be. It's not gonna come out right.
And that's why I always tell peoplelike listen, go get you some help.
I know there's still a lot ofpeople in the church it's like,
well, why you oh this?People going to see therapists and all this
stuff. Listen, y'all know,I love me Jesus, I'm a profidence
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of the Lord. Okay, Ilove God. But what I am going
to say is that God made mego through therapy, which was a part
of my healing process. I hadto go through a season of therapy right
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and really talk out a lot ofissues. And I'm not saying that I
start for there's still some issues Ineed to talk out. But I mean
I've got of backed up for alittle bit, you know, because I
mean, in the beginning, Ineeded to go like every week, you
know what I mean, like everyweek because it was just so much trauma
that I had to hack because ofall the issues that I had in childhood.
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And people do not understand that thisstuff is real, that this stuff
is real because people are watching.You have little people watching you, and
they're thinking this is okay. Andthen you have sometimes it's the opposite.
It's like sometimes you be wondering whywhy certain people will be like okay,
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okay, well you know what,I'm not even gonna be in a relationship
with nobody. I ain't gonna dealwith nobody, and so they're very to
themselves. They don't want to eveninteract with people, right. And then
sometimes you know some people they justlike listen, I don't you know what
I mean, Like they free fraud. They don't, don't. I mean,
they think it's just like listen,I'm gonna go from you know what
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I'm saying. It's just like Ithink a lot of times people don't even
understand that portion of it. Butthe fact of the matter is that was
a that was something I really wantedto highlight tonight, and the part of
the extramurtal affair. Like, dude, Okay, I don't believe that nobody
should cheat. I don't not inno relationship. If you if you married
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somebody, now, if you stillsingle and you trying to figure out like
who your spouse is supposed to be, I ain't condoning that either. But
it is a heavily It's a differencewhen you married to somebody and they step
out on the marriage and you justdating somebody, you know what I mean,
Like people break up our time.But what I'm saying is that you
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like, that's just wrong, youknow what I mean? And if you
knew that you were having issues oryou But see, the thing is you
didn't want to be found out.That guy didn't want to be found out.
So because he wanted what his cakeand eat it too. Because you're
still a little boy, you don'tknow how to deal with women, you
still want to play around. Butmy thing is, if you still wanted
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to play around, you should havenever gotten married. But now kudos to
you if you were trying to havea family and you wanted to have kids
and you were trying to do theright thing in that sense. But even
then, I don't think that youshould be getting married because you have kids
either, Like, oh, Ihave kids. I have a kid with
somebody, so we gonna get married. That's not how that works either.
I'm just gonna call a thing athing. I don't think people. People
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don't like to tell the truth,but we're gonna listen. We telling the
truth of shame the devil. Youdon't even get married just because you have
a baby with somebody, That notmean that's who the Lord put you with.
Just because you had a baby withthem does not mean that's who you're
supposed to be married to. Okay, and like once again, you need
to and even before you even laydown with that person, you should have
been talking to the lord. Let'sgo, let's go back to the root
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call. You should have been talkedto start talking to the Lord before you
even decided you was gonna even dothat part. You shouldn't have been laying
with them anyway, because they wasn'tyour spouse. But we understand how everybody
says. But I'm just saying,like people don't think about that. We
don't think about who we sit thereand who we lay down with to make
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children and things like that. Andthey, yes, what I'm saying,
like you don't, you don't understand. And then you want to know why
your kids come out and they actingall crazy and wild or you know what
I'm saying. While you see acertain pattern, it's because you should have
never swapt. And this goes formen and women. Listen, I ain't
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listen. We ain't just like,oh here we bashing me. No,
it's for me and in them,because I've seen it for both sides.
You've got some men and some dogs, and you got some women that are
some dolls. DDE said, Ilike, my god, I'm like,
you know, and I feel badfor the people who legitimately want to be
in relationships with people like they arereally really in love, like they pour
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their heart out, they want youknow what I mean. They had a
baby by this dude. They givehim everything, fool wife benefits and the
dude, Like I said that,y'all have been together, y'all been in
a relationship for ten years. Andthis dude, they once said he gonna
marry you. He comfortable where heat moment y'all break up. He meets
little Susie down the street. Theythey for about six months. He didn't
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propose to her, and they getmarried. I know that has to do
something to you, to be like, so I gave this dude ten years
of my life and two kids andhe literally left me and now he with
this woman and he married her.Was I not good enough? You know
what I mean? Like, Iknow that has to do something. That's
why I'm saying. I told myhusband again in her tell y'all, I'll
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tell him, I said, alove so two years right there, we
dain't for two years? If ifif, if you can't propose to me
after year two, it's a wrap. I'm sorry. I'm just one of
the people because, like I said, I've seen too many and I've spoken
to too many men who literally willsit there and be like, man,
that's wifey material right, like listlooking at it. One, that's that's
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my wife. I'm like, howdo you even know she your wife?
Or be like yeah, I'm juststating her for about Like man, after
three six months, they're like,man, listen you my wife. We
get married, Like, come on, we're going to the courthouse now.
So the fact that I know thatmen can do that, don't waste my
time. You might be a littlefearful and that's fine, but don't waste
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my time. And I think wegotta get back to that too, y'all,
like like having being intentional about datinglike this. I mean, I
know we was talking about this article, but that just kind of came up
to we got to learn to beintentional about our marriage partners. Because when
you come together with somebody, you'recoming together because God is putting you together
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to fulfill a particular mission. Thereis an assignment on your life, right
we are helping, We are tohelp the man whatever vision he has.
We are to help him bring thatvision to life. We should be submitting
to the mission. So that's anotherthing to start doing, like okay,
asking ladies like, okay, sowhat's your goals? Like what is it
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that you that you want to do? What is it that you're trying to
accomplish? Because if this man can'ttell you, like I'm trying to accomplish
X, Y, and Z,this is what I'm looking to do,
then you need to be like,Okay, so why am I coming along
with you? I'm just riding withyou just to be riding. I'm just
your companion. We just campaigned likeno, this is more than a companionship,
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Like I am here to help you, you're here to help me.
I'm here to help you. Right, This is a partnership. God has
placed us together to sharpen each otherbut also to ultimately push a mission forward
and a lot of times like you'renot gonna be the same, because if
you're the same, this is what'sgonna happen. But the moment that y'all,
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y'all both gonna be different in areasYou're gonna be stronger in areas he's
gonna be strong in areas, inthe areas that you're weak. This is
what happens. He's bringing you togetherlike this, like a puzzle piece,
and to help push a mission forwardthat he has for your marriage, even
when it comes down to the kids, right in particular giftings and assignments and
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your children. And so you justhave to this guy think about things like
that. Like I said, Iknow a lot of times people don't think
about that. But that's the partwhere we have to think about just making
sure that you're taking your vow seriouslybecause a lot of people don't understand,
like, regardless if you're a Christianor not, you still took a vow
before God. You still made avow. And the fact that you can
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sit there and just be like manwhatever, because you've never really understood what
you were doing when you said,I do you just really what really?
Even though it said till death doyou part, what you really said was
until something bad happens or just somethingbetter come along and then after that.
I'm homping, but that that's notwhat the marriage val said. It's not
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what it said. And so wegot to get to a place, like
I said, where we do betterin that we do better in that,
and it really begins to faint.Not thinking with our gentile tools, not
thinking with our lustful spirits, notthinking from a place of infatuation, not
thinking from a place of a loneliness, but really getting to a place where
(24:36):
like we just sit down and thinkand really, like I said, you
want to be healed. I thinkwe need to talk about that. That's
probably the it's gonna be another wholepodcast. Maybe that might mean next week
we'll get into that about that healingpart before, like with things that you
should have and do before you sayI do, like because all that other
(24:56):
stuff, like it's just like peoplejust be trying. They want they want
it, but it's like, listen, you want to be prepared. I'm
not saying that you're going to befully put like like just like people who
have kids, right, I'm prettysure that there's some people that probably plan,
plan, plan, plan, plan, But you can't plan for everything.
Baby, you can't plan for that, you know what I mean,
(25:18):
Like, there's certain things you can'tplan for, and so you know what
I'm saying. So you just wantto but you still want to be prepared
to the best of your ability.I think that that's key phrase right there,
be prepared to the best of yourability, because not planning and planning
something it's like two extremes. Butbeing prepared to the best of your ability.
(25:42):
It's better than one not having aplan at all, or two planning
everything to the t to where youthink, oh, it needs to be
this, this, this, crossevery t, you dot every eye and
then when the plan doesn't go theway the way that you think, it's
like, oh, no, thisis not the plan. I'm scrapped in
it because we're quick to do that. Like I know, I'm just gonna
(26:03):
use myself for an example. Iknow I was like that at the beginning
of our marriage. I was avery big planner. Like I wanted things
like one of the things to bedone at a certain time, at a
certain pace in life. And likeshe had to get on me and say,
you can't plan your whole life likeout like that, because if you
did plan your life out like that, you would have been dead and gone
(26:23):
to heaven like literally, Like Iremember, you know, my wife telling
me that because I was a bigplanner and I thought, you know,
it had to be done a certainway. But I think that's another thing
that condition of this world say,yeah, society has messed it up.
It did. You got to bemarried by twenty five five June twenty five
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and thirty and then after that youneed to have kids and then have this
type of job to make this muchmoney. Then bout thirty five you need
to make sure you have a home. About between thirty and thirty five,
you got to make sure you havehad like it like you and you really
start to think like, oh myGod, because I haven't, I haven't
made it this far, or I'mnot fair yet. Then you think that
you failed, and it's like God'slike, but that's not the plan I
(27:07):
even have for you. But yousaid, he's trying to make your own
little plan, and it's like,that's not the plan I have for you.
And when the Lord broke it downfor me like that, he's like,
you want everything. He's like,Brianna, you want everything to happen
now, he said, But literally, if everything happened now, then that's
your whole life and then it's timeto come home to heaven. He said.
I've literally designed your life for certainthings to happen at certain particular moments
(27:33):
in time throughout your entire life span, which means you have a full life.
Not okay, yeah, I gottado all this and then it's like
boom, I'm gone. Now somepeople listen, I ain't gonna lie.
I really do believe some people knowwhen they're gonna die. And it's like,
okay, I know, I gotthis much time left. I gotta
get I gotta get X, Yand Z together. I get that.
You know what I mean. Ifthat's between you and the Lord, it's
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the Lord and said, listen,you only get a certain amount of years
to get X, Y and done. Then you need to get X,
Y and Z done. Okay,I'm not I'm not talking to you.
I'm talking to the majority of thepeople right who don't know, right,
And it's just like okay, I'mjust it's like God, like God said,
it's just he has things playing throughoutyour entire life. Like now we
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know that things happen. Some peopledie strematurely, some live long lives,
and some people, you know,some people die right when some people died
young, and they were meant tolike that was just their time, right,
they were meant to just die young, right, They were only meant
to accomplish whatever little thing they weresupposed to in that little light within their
lifespan, and that was it,right, But hey, man, I
(28:38):
ain't trying to get into death.Who were just talking about that example?
But yeah, just like I said, we just wanted to bring that article
up tonight because I think it isimportant like that to me was just devastating
to hear that and definitely going tobe praying for that young girl because,
like I said, that's going tobe something that's in her head. And
(29:00):
then going forth and dating, likehow is that going to determine your relationship?
Are you going to know? Like, Okay, I don't want a
man like that. I want aman that's good. Are you going to
be attracted to men like that?Because that's what you saw, you know
what I mean? And even theother child that was hiding in the closet
because they were scared, you knowwhat I mean? Like what is what
(29:21):
is the impact on that child?Like for me, I'm always thinking like
that, like, Okay, howis this going to play out on the
next generation? Because with the devilwon't he won't to steal the next generation,
and so we have to make surethat we're fighting back and to keep
our keeping up hold of our generationright, to make sure that they're standing
(29:41):
on a firm foundation. I mean, but tonight, the scripture that we
have is coming out of First Corinthiansthirteen through four AM. We're going to
read in an amplified version. Andso it says love endoers with patience and
serenity. Love is kind and thoughtful, and it's not jealous or envious.
(30:02):
Love does not brag. It isnot proud or arrogant. It's not rude,
It is not self seeking. Itis not provoked, nor overly sensitive
and easily angered. It does nottake into account a wrong endured. It
does not rejoice at injustice, butrejoices with the truth when right in truth
(30:23):
prevailed. Love bears all things regardlessof what comes, believes all things,
looking for the best in each one, hopes all things, remaining steady fast
during difficult times, endures all thingswithout weakening. Love never fails. It
never fades nor ends. Amen.And going back to the article right,
(30:47):
I love this right here at numbersix, verse six. It is not
rejoice at injustice, but rejoices withthe truth when right in truth prevailed.
Nor is overly sensitive and easily anger. And so when you look at that,
it's like that man wasn't really showinglove. That man that doesn't even
know what love is, doesn't evenknow what love is. Not jealous of
(31:10):
envious, does not brag. It'snot proud or ericant. It is not
rude, it is not self seeking, It is not provoked. That man
doesn't know what love is. Hehasn't even have a clue what love he
is. But the truth is,if I'm being honest, I don't think
a lot of people know what lovehe is. Not that true a guy
fey love. Not that unconditional love, not true unconditional love. And I've
(31:33):
heard a lot of people talk about, you know, love should have conditions.
I used to believe in unconditional love, But no love need to have
conditions. A man mad in alie from the pit of hell. I'm
just gonna tell it to you likethat right now. Love is unconditional by
the maker, the one that madeus. He gave his unconditional love.
He gave that unconditional love when hewas hanging on that cross. That is
(31:57):
unconditional love right there. And Idon't know anybody else that can show unconditional
love like our savior. But yeah, tonight, if anybody should once loved,
you're welcome to join join him.He gives that unconditional love. But
what I will say, because I'mnot a person who's for abused, I've
heard people who stay. You know, well the man, Well, if
(32:21):
you got married to a man hewas abusing you, boy, he was
showing you some that he was abusedto before you got married. That's not
always true because some people know howto act baby, and they can hide,
they can have and they do everythinggood until you say I do,
and then after that, I justwant to go down the hill. So
you mean to tell me that thisperson who's with this person like I said,
(32:44):
like? Cause like I said,sometimes people don't be showing their true
colors. And then you didn't gotwith somebody and that person is beating you
senselessly. I'm not gonna tell youto stay. My mama didn't stay,
thank God, Praise the Lord Jesus. I'm sorry, love my daddy to
that. But I'm not one ofthem. If you beating something, because
there are women who have literally losttheir lives because they leader, they spiritual
(33:07):
leader told them that they had tostay in a relationship. There are women
who are literally losing their lives andI'm to save even some men. People
are losing their lives over that.Now that, yeah, we ain't doing
that. Are you sexually abusing achild? You know your child's being sexually
abused by a predator, your husbandor your wife as a predator. It
(33:29):
is sexually abusing your child and youknow it, and you choose to stay
and you're supposed to be a gatekeeperover that child. Wo onto you,
WEO onto you. That's all Ican say because at the end of the
day, we got we gotta pray. But once again, you know,
if people are in their closets andthey speaking to the Lord, the Lord
gonna tell you who you're supposed tobe with, who you're not gonna be
(33:50):
with. I don't believe the Lordgonna put you with somebody who's abusive,
who's gonna be beating you anyway.But you gotta be praying about that.
You gotta be speaking to the Lord. You can't just be like, oh
he looked good, he found letme get with him. And that's what
a lot of wine want. Theywant these thugs. I want this thug,
but I want him saved. Whichone you want? It's either he
gonna be saved or he's gonna bea thug. Like I'm just trying to
figure out which one easy because hecan't be both. Now, I'm not
(34:13):
saying there ain't no reform thugs outthere, but does he really want you?
I'm just saying, so that's awhole other side. Sat actually them
some good time. But anyway,y'all, that was tonight. We pray
that it blessed you like it blessedus. And like I said, if
anyone's out there that's in a abusiverelationship, I'm sorry, not sorry.
(34:38):
I'm gonna tell it to you likeit is. Run get out, save
yourself, Run save your child.If your child is being abused or harm
in any type of way, physically, sexually, whatever the situation is,
I don't even care if it's aboutyour own parents, I don't care if
it's about uncle. Whatever. Youneed to get away from that situation.
(35:01):
Don't let your family members and allthat stuff speak to you. You are
the gatekeeper over your child, soand you will be held accountable at judgment
for that. And I don't thinkpeople understand that. But anyways, all
right, y'all. We spoke alot tonight and we will see you guys
(35:22):
again next week next Thursday. Weare excited, all right, guys.
We love you with the love ofChrist. Let's go ahead and close on
prayer and we will see you nextweek. Father God, just thank you
for allowing us to come together tonight, Father God, and just hearing a
word from you Lord, in thename of Jesus, Father God, I
(35:43):
pray over everyone's marriage right now.I pray healing and restoration over marriages God,
Father God. I even pray overthe broken marriages God, Marritius that
can be healed and minded. FatherGod, we pray over them God in
the name of Jesus. For FatherGod, we even pray right now for
people who are an abuse of relationshipsGod, and they're scared and they don't
(36:05):
even know how to get out ofthe situation. God, we pray for
them, God, that you willmake a way of escape for them.
God, in the name of Jesusor Glory to God, make a way
of escape. Allow them to beprotected, God, Allow them to be
safe God from any type of dangeror harm. And Father God, we
even pray over the babies that arebeing physically abused by the God, sexually
(36:28):
abused by the God, by familymembers, by fathers, by mothers,
by uncles, by brothers, bycousins, by nephews and cousins, and
all that God and strangers. Godin the name of Jesus, we pray
over them right now, God,that you will put your loving arms around
them and begin to heal them.God in the name of Jesus, heal
(36:49):
them, God, restore them,God in the name of Jesus, and
put them in the proper care ofsomeone who will truly love them and care
for them. God in the nameof Jesus, remove them out of the
homes. God, remove the childrenout of the homes, whether being taken
advantage of God, whether there beingabused God in the name of Jesus,
(37:09):
Glory to God in the name ofJesus, Glory to God. And we
even pray over the victimizes God.We pray over their mind, God,
that their mind be renewed for theGod in the name of Jesus, that
you're creating them a clean heart.God, renew a right spirit within them.
God in the name of Jesus,allow them to come into contact with
You. Lord in the name ofJesus, allow them to have a true
(37:31):
relationship with your Father. In thename of Jesus. Glory to God,
Hallelujah, Thank your Father, Thankyour Father, Oh God, Thank you
Lord, Thank you Lord Oo God. And we pray right now tonight that
this word will will touch the peoplewho who is meant to touch and speak
(37:52):
to those people God, even intheir the quiet time, even in their
in their private time God, privateand quiet time God, when it's just
you and them God, and thetruth can set them free. Lord.
In the name of Jesus, Godand Father God. We even pray over
those abusers God who want to stopbeing abusive God, but don't know how
(38:15):
God. But Father God, weask that they just reach out to you,
Father God, and that you helpthem control that spirit of anger.
God. Rid them of the spiritof rage, Father God, rid them
of the spirit of sexual lust Godand perversion God, a sexual immorality.
God, in the name of Jesus, cleanse them, Father, sanctify them,
(38:35):
purify them, allow them to comeinto the and to know who you
are as their Lord. And saveYour Lord. Because God, we know
that you don't wish, You don'twant anyone to praerish God in the name
of Jesus, So, Father God, we pray over them now. We
pray over them now. We prayover them now, and we say thank
(38:59):
you Father, who, thank youLord, Thank you Lord. And it'sen
Jesus' name that we pray. Amen. Amen. All right, All right,
y'all, we are out. Seeyou guys next week week. Thank
(39:20):
you guys for listening to another episodeof Mary with Autism. We would love
to hear from you regarding certain topicsthat you would like to see addressed,
life changing testimonies you would like toshare or information on how you can become
against on the show. Please emailus at hippo at Married with Autism dot
com. As always, we loveyou all with the love of Christ.
Remember to keep Christ first and allthat you do, including your marriage,
(39:42):
and watch the Lord begin to transformyour life. Be blessed.
Ce Be Supremes. Welcome to themarrit with Autism Podcast, a podcast as
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(01:42):
we are back. Cannot wait toget into this topic tonight. You
know, I figure we do justsomething different tonight, because you know,
so the podcast is about marriage ofcourse, especially with autism. But tonight
at as figure we would just gowith this article tonight that actually I ended
up seeing earlier today and it triggeredsomething in me. But I was like,
(02:06):
ooh, this would be something goodto talk about tonight, even with
my husband and with you guys.And so we're gonna talk about this tonight.
We're gonna get into this tonight.So just one, like I said,
welcome everyone to Marry with Autism.I'm your host. One of your
hosts, right prophet is Free SmithPata Eric Smith. Yeah, and we
are getting into this topic tonight.So y'all know how we do. Before
(02:30):
we even start, We're gonna goahead and pray and then we're gonna jump
right into the article. And thenwe're gonna jump into the conversation. All
right. So amen, hey babe, let us pray evning. Father,
we just come to you tonight.Lord. We just first and foremost thank
you God. Thank you for yourgoodness God. Thank you for keeping us
(02:52):
the whole day. God. Thankyou for giving us the strength to go
through the day. God, andthank you for being our God and being
the God of the universe. Soright now, Father God, I just
thank you and I glorify you forwhat you have done, all that you
are doing right now and the miraclesthat are to come. God. So
give us this day, God,as the says in the Lord's prayer,
(03:12):
give us this day our daily brand, and allow us to forgive those who
have done wrong against us, aswe forgive those who trespass against us.
And I just thank you God thatyou are keeping you keep us delivered from
evil. You give us the strengththe fight the enemy and the strongholds that
you know try to come our way, but those strongholds are just broken down
and they just fall down to theto the ground in your name God.
(03:37):
So right now, Father God,we just thank you for you being a
mighty God and being the God ofpower and authority, and thank you for
giving us the power and authority totrampo over serpents and scorpions. God.
And let tonight's prayer message in thisarticle w be like convicting one way or
another, and let it be apoint of growth God. And for every
(03:57):
mayor's that that you know, watchesyou know, and for those that are
desired to be married God. Sowe just love you, we glorify you,
and we honor you in advance.God, that's in your name,
we do pray. Amen, Amen, all right. And so here is
the article and so so it saysAlabama man brutally beats teen daughter for revealing
(04:23):
extra marital affair. Okay, allright, it says an Alabama man was
arrested for brutally beating his teenage daughterfor revealing his extra marital affair. The
fourteen year old girl fled to aneighbor's house, covered in obvious injuries.
According to Franklin County Sheriff's deputies whofound Christopher and I cannot pronounce the man's
(04:45):
name or child, whoever it is, It was hiding in a bedroom closet
in the family's trailer home with selfinflicted cuts on his arms and waits.
The rest ofville home was in adisarray, and deputies found the televisi didn't
have been destroyed. Laptop computers werecrushed and ripped apart, kitchen items were
scattered, and furniture clothing from thechildren's bedrooms were thrown from the inside,
(05:11):
and a second child was hiding ina closet. The victim told investigator she
had told her mother that the thirtyyear old thirty nine year old had a
secret social media account and she suspectedhe was having an affair, and her
father beat her when he found out. The girl said her father punched her,
shruck her with a shower curtain rodand a piece of wood, shoved
(05:35):
her to the floor, slapped her, and through beerd bottles and other items
at her. Her father told herto clean up the mess, but she
ran out of the off the kitchendoor when she went to get trash bags.
And the man was charged with firstdegree domestic violence, assault, child
abuse, and first degree domestic violence. And so there's a lot to really
(06:00):
I'm packing this. That's why Ikind of wanted to bring this out.
I think this is a good topicthat was touching on there's a lot of
good points tonight be first and foremost. Y'all know a lot of people in
my background. Some people don't.I grew up in an abusive household.
I've seen what abuse us to families. I've seen my mother be abused.
Like I said, I was abusedmy father. Don't hate the man,
(06:23):
really do love my father. Butit took a long time to get to
this point of healing. And aswell as my father witnessing my father have
another have an extra murderal affair andhave another child on my mother while they
were married. And so that isa lot on a family. But nevertheless,
(06:45):
I want to say that it isnever appropriate, and I think this
is where we have to I don'tcare if you're a man or a woman.
The fact of the matter is whenGod put together family, when he
created, when he put together aman and a woman, and you guys
came together and created kids, right, a family, right, family's birth
nations right. There's purpose within family. And when you have to understand that
(07:13):
when you have children, parents aregatekeepers over their children's souls, over their
children's spirits, right over their developmentand things like that. And so it
is vitally important that as you beginto raise your children, you raise them
in the way that they should go, so when they get older that you
do not depart from that wisdom.Right. But it's just a shame to
(07:38):
read this article and you see aman who gets mad, so mad at
his daughter that because she exposes himfor stepping out on the mother, right,
because he wanted to have his cakeand eat it too. But you
took all that pain the child thatyou brought into the world, the child
that you were responsible or and youbegin to beat this child. And I
(08:05):
guess for me, you know,of course, like I said, being
a child that was abused, itwas like I could almost resonate with that
because I remember there were times wheremy parents would have arguments, and I'm
the person that's getting a lot ofthe of the of the brunt force trauma
or I would you know, I'mgetting I'm getting the abuse, right,
I'm getting the backlash from whatever situationhas transpired between them. And it may
(08:28):
not have nothing to do with me, but I'm being the scapegoat in that
moment of the rage, right,And I don't believe that's ever appropriate.
I don't care if you're a manor a woman who's doing that to the
point where you want to take allthat out on your child instead of learning
to take full responsibility for the actionsthat you've taken. But see a lot
(08:50):
of people they don't know how toface the truth. They want to do
all they dirt, They want todo all they dirt, They want to
do all this stuff that they're doing, but they wanted to remain hidden.
And we know that who who doesthat. That's stating darkness never wants to
come to light. Darkness always wantsto remain hidden and secretive and doing all
(09:11):
this stuff. But that is notright. And like I said, I'm
I just I cannot stand it.I do not like to see people victimized
or do not like to see peoplebeing hurt or taken advantage of or whatever
because you feel like, oh,well, you you need to stay in
a child's place or whatever. Butit was like you decided that you wanted
(09:35):
to step out and do this tothis woman, and you think that that
child's not gonna say something because youthey dad or you they mom, like
they come on, we gotta,we gotta, we gotta get past this.
If you're gonna be a family,then be a family, you know
what I mean. Like I said, it can go, It can go
(09:56):
so deep. And I understand howeverybody's call to marriage because there's some people
that never need to marry, andthere's some people that never need to pro
create either, and they have procreated. But nevertheless, it does not
justify you getting to the point ofyou want to verb that you want to
assault your own child. So anotherpoint, I'm gonna let my husband kind
(10:18):
of speak on that for a littlebit and then jump into some more of
this. Yeah, just reading thearticle and first began with him. He
had some deep rooted issues that heneeded to address within himself, and he
was so scared to address it himselfor come face to face with the man
in the mirror. If he wouldhave just manned up and said, Hey,
(10:39):
I got this issue I'm facing withor I'm cheating on my wife or
whatever it is, and I can'thave stop this lust of women outside of
my marriage. Like if he wouldhave manned up and said, hey,
I need help right here, thenhe could have prevented all that you know
stuff from happening. He could init, you know, first, the
(11:01):
extra marital affair and then he wouldhave prevented the property damage and the abuse
that he put on his on oneof his own offspring. So for for
him, you're not a real man, and I'm but I just got to
be saved. Save for what itis. I'm just gonna say, for
what it is, I'm not gonnashy away from it. Like he wasn't
a real man, didn't didn't takeresponsibility for his own actions, for his
(11:24):
own dirt. And if he,if he would have said, hey,
I need help in these areas likeand spoken to his wife to work it
out, and you know, evenat another time spoke to his daughter or
I don't know if they have anyother kids and be like, hey,
you know, daddy has some issueshe he got to work out. Know
that, you know, I loveyou. We're still a family, because
(11:46):
no families stick together. Number oneand number two. You know, as
the man, you're like, asmen, we're made to not just lead
our households, but protect and coverour How our households are, our wives
are, our children. Where thebackground like the society. I know a
lot a lot of times as men, there's a lot of things on our
(12:09):
shoulders. But at the same time, we still got to press on and
do what you know, the mostHigh God has called us to do,
as you know, the men ofthe house. And to me, I
mean, I'm not bashing, I'mjust speaking it for what it is.
And this is just hear me bythe spirit right here, This is just
this is just another excuse of youknow, neglecting your responsibilities. And you
(12:31):
know, as men, we're youknow, being responsible and taking accountability for
things in this society. It isnot it's not praised on. But I'm
gonna tell tell the world this righthere and right now. As men,
I don't care what skin color youare, how old you are, whatever
you are, wherever you follow uponany of those things, we have a
(12:54):
more more right to you know,take responsibility for our own actions and to
God, to God, our families, because if we don't, who else
will. Right And see, alot of times people don't understand what you're
doing. And this is what Ihad to learn in my own marriage,
right because I saw the abuse,I saw the type of language that was
(13:18):
being used in the relationship. Isaw these things. See, parents don't
understand because my mother would always tellthis to me growing up. And I
love you mom, if you're listeningto this, but it's the truth,
do as I say, not asI do. But see that contradicts itself
because a lot of times kids modelthe behavior of their parents. So if
(13:41):
you're cursing all the time, youmore than likely your kids gonna grow up
and be a curser. I'm sorry. If you're fighting people, your kids
don't grow up and be a fighter. I mean, if you out there
lusting and having sex with all thesepeople, and then you wonder why your
teenagers lusting and having sex with allthese people in the door, it's because
they saw you do it. Ifyou're a man and you're in the household
(14:05):
and you're beating that that child,that little boy or little girl's mother,
then your son is probably nine timesout of teen and is gonna grow up
and beat women because in their mindthey think that it's okay, But it's
not okay. It is not okay. And then you got to think too.
If you are a daughter and she'sseeing her mom being be so in
her mind she thinking, oh yeah, oh yeah, that's what love is.
(14:28):
Love is for my man to cussme out and put his hands on
me and to dog me out.And that's what love is. So when
a good man comes, I'm nothe laying he is he that I can't
I can't do that, can he? Lamb? But really, baby,
you broken, you traumatized because younever got the healing that you needed because
(14:50):
you saw this this function that wenton in your family. But that's never
how God intended for that relationship tolook like, because the relationship the Mayor
Ridge was supposed to reflect that ofChrist and so in the church. But
I also have to understand that alot of people are saved, so they're
not gonna understand that concept. Butstill I just I'm sorry, but not
(15:15):
sorry. At the same time,like to me, it's never an excuse
to sit there and put your handson your child, on your wife or
whatever, because you cannot take personalresponsibility for your actions. And a lot
of people don't know how to dothat. But then again, I think
it comes with a certain level ofemotional intelligence. You have to have a
(15:37):
certain level of emotional intelligence. Butif you're not right up here, of
course everything else is not gonna be. It's not gonna come out right.
And that's why I always tell peoplelike listen, go get you some help.
I know there's still a lot ofpeople in the church it's like,
well, why you oh this?People going to see therapists and all this
stuff. Listen, y'all know,I love me Jesus, I'm a profidence
(16:00):
of the Lord. Okay, Ilove God. But what I am going
to say is that God made mego through therapy, which was a part
of my healing process. I hadto go through a season of therapy right
(16:21):
and really talk out a lot ofissues. And I'm not saying that I
start for there's still some issues Ineed to talk out. But I mean
I've got of backed up for alittle bit, you know, because I
mean, in the beginning, Ineeded to go like every week, you
know what I mean, like everyweek because it was just so much trauma
that I had to hack because ofall the issues that I had in childhood.
(16:41):
And people do not understand that thisstuff is real, that this stuff
is real because people are watching.You have little people watching you, and
they're thinking this is okay. Andthen you have sometimes it's the opposite.
It's like sometimes you be wondering whywhy certain people will be like okay,
(17:02):
okay, well you know what,I'm not even gonna be in a relationship
with nobody. I ain't gonna dealwith nobody, and so they're very to
themselves. They don't want to eveninteract with people, right. And then
sometimes you know some people they justlike listen, I don't you know what
I mean, Like they free fraud. They don't, don't. I mean,
they think it's just like listen,I'm gonna go from you know what
(17:23):
I'm saying. It's just like Ithink a lot of times people don't even
understand that portion of it. Butthe fact of the matter is that was
a that was something I really wantedto highlight tonight, and the part of
the extramurtal affair. Like, dude, Okay, I don't believe that nobody
should cheat. I don't not inno relationship. If you if you married
(17:45):
somebody, now, if you stillsingle and you trying to figure out like
who your spouse is supposed to be, I ain't condoning that either. But
it is a heavily It's a differencewhen you married to somebody and they step
out on the marriage and you justdating somebody, you know what I mean,
Like people break up our time.But what I'm saying is that you
(18:07):
like, that's just wrong, youknow what I mean? And if you
knew that you were having issues oryou But see, the thing is you
didn't want to be found out.That guy didn't want to be found out.
So because he wanted what his cakeand eat it too. Because you're
still a little boy, you don'tknow how to deal with women, you
still want to play around. Butmy thing is, if you still wanted
(18:30):
to play around, you should havenever gotten married. But now kudos to
you if you were trying to havea family and you wanted to have kids
and you were trying to do theright thing in that sense. But even
then, I don't think that youshould be getting married because you have kids
either, Like, oh, Ihave kids. I have a kid with
somebody, so we gonna get married. That's not how that works either.
I'm just gonna call a thing athing. I don't think people. People
(18:52):
don't like to tell the truth,but we're gonna listen. We telling the
truth of shame the devil. Youdon't even get married just because you have
a baby with somebody, That notmean that's who the Lord put you with.
Just because you had a baby withthem does not mean that's who you're
supposed to be married to. Okay, and like once again, you need
to and even before you even laydown with that person, you should have
been talking to the lord. Let'sgo, let's go back to the root
(19:15):
call. You should have been talkedto start talking to the Lord before you
even decided you was gonna even dothat part. You shouldn't have been laying
with them anyway, because they wasn'tyour spouse. But we understand how everybody
says. But I'm just saying,like people don't think about that. We
don't think about who we sit thereand who we lay down with to make
(19:36):
children and things like that. Andthey, yes, what I'm saying,
like you don't, you don't understand. And then you want to know why
your kids come out and they actingall crazy and wild or you know what
I'm saying. While you see acertain pattern, it's because you should have
never swapt. And this goes formen and women. Listen, I ain't
(19:56):
listen. We ain't just like,oh here we bashing me. No,
it's for me and in them,because I've seen it for both sides.
You've got some men and some dogs, and you got some women that are
some dolls. DDE said, Ilike, my god, I'm like,
you know, and I feel badfor the people who legitimately want to be
in relationships with people like they arereally really in love, like they pour
(20:19):
their heart out, they want youknow what I mean. They had a
baby by this dude. They givehim everything, fool wife benefits and the
dude, Like I said that,y'all have been together, y'all been in
a relationship for ten years. Andthis dude, they once said he gonna
marry you. He comfortable where heat moment y'all break up. He meets
little Susie down the street. Theythey for about six months. He didn't
(20:41):
propose to her, and they getmarried. I know that has to do
something to you, to be like, so I gave this dude ten years
of my life and two kids andhe literally left me and now he with
this woman and he married her.Was I not good enough? You know
what I mean? Like, Iknow that has to do something. That's
why I'm saying. I told myhusband again in her tell y'all, I'll
(21:03):
tell him, I said, alove so two years right there, we
dain't for two years? If ifif, if you can't propose to me
after year two, it's a wrap. I'm sorry. I'm just one of
the people because, like I said, I've seen too many and I've spoken
to too many men who literally willsit there and be like, man,
that's wifey material right, like listlooking at it. One, that's that's
(21:26):
my wife. I'm like, howdo you even know she your wife?
Or be like yeah, I'm juststating her for about Like man, after
three six months, they're like,man, listen you my wife. We
get married, Like, come on, we're going to the courthouse now.
So the fact that I know thatmen can do that, don't waste my
time. You might be a littlefearful and that's fine, but don't waste
(21:47):
my time. And I think wegotta get back to that too, y'all,
like like having being intentional about datinglike this. I mean, I
know we was talking about this article, but that just kind of came up
to we got to learn to beintentional about our marriage partners. Because when
you come together with somebody, you'recoming together because God is putting you together
(22:08):
to fulfill a particular mission. Thereis an assignment on your life, right
we are helping, We are tohelp the man whatever vision he has.
We are to help him bring thatvision to life. We should be submitting
to the mission. So that's anotherthing to start doing, like okay,
asking ladies like, okay, sowhat's your goals? Like what is it
(22:30):
that you that you want to do? What is it that you're trying to
accomplish? Because if this man can'ttell you, like I'm trying to accomplish
X, Y, and Z,this is what I'm looking to do,
then you need to be like,Okay, so why am I coming along
with you? I'm just riding withyou just to be riding. I'm just
your companion. We just campaigned likeno, this is more than a companionship,
(22:51):
Like I am here to help you, you're here to help me.
I'm here to help you. Right, This is a partnership. God has
placed us together to sharpen each otherbut also to ultimately push a mission forward
and a lot of times like you'renot gonna be the same, because if
you're the same, this is what'sgonna happen. But the moment that y'all,
(23:11):
y'all both gonna be different in areasYou're gonna be stronger in areas he's
gonna be strong in areas, inthe areas that you're weak. This is
what happens. He's bringing you togetherlike this, like a puzzle piece,
and to help push a mission forwardthat he has for your marriage, even
when it comes down to the kids, right in particular giftings and assignments and
(23:32):
your children. And so you justhave to this guy think about things like
that. Like I said, Iknow a lot of times people don't think
about that. But that's the partwhere we have to think about just making
sure that you're taking your vow seriouslybecause a lot of people don't understand,
like, regardless if you're a Christianor not, you still took a vow
before God. You still made avow. And the fact that you can
(23:53):
sit there and just be like manwhatever, because you've never really understood what
you were doing when you said,I do you just really what really?
Even though it said till death doyou part, what you really said was
until something bad happens or just somethingbetter come along and then after that.
I'm homping, but that that's notwhat the marriage val said. It's not
(24:14):
what it said. And so wegot to get to a place, like
I said, where we do betterin that we do better in that,
and it really begins to faint.Not thinking with our gentile tools, not
thinking with our lustful spirits, notthinking from a place of infatuation, not
thinking from a place of a loneliness, but really getting to a place where
(24:36):
like we just sit down and thinkand really, like I said, you
want to be healed. I thinkwe need to talk about that. That's
probably the it's gonna be another wholepodcast. Maybe that might mean next week
we'll get into that about that healingpart before, like with things that you
should have and do before you sayI do, like because all that other
(24:56):
stuff, like it's just like peoplejust be trying. They want they want
it, but it's like, listen, you want to be prepared. I'm
not saying that you're going to befully put like like just like people who
have kids, right, I'm prettysure that there's some people that probably plan,
plan, plan, plan, plan, But you can't plan for everything.
Baby, you can't plan for that, you know what I mean,
(25:18):
Like, there's certain things you can'tplan for, and so you know what
I'm saying. So you just wantto but you still want to be prepared
to the best of your ability.I think that that's key phrase right there,
be prepared to the best of yourability, because not planning and planning
something it's like two extremes. Butbeing prepared to the best of your ability.
(25:42):
It's better than one not having aplan at all, or two planning
everything to the t to where youthink, oh, it needs to be
this, this, this, crossevery t, you dot every eye and
then when the plan doesn't go theway the way that you think, it's
like, oh, no, thisis not the plan. I'm scrapped in
it because we're quick to do that. Like I know, I'm just gonna
(26:03):
use myself for an example. Iknow I was like that at the beginning
of our marriage. I was avery big planner. Like I wanted things
like one of the things to bedone at a certain time, at a
certain pace in life. And likeshe had to get on me and say,
you can't plan your whole life likeout like that, because if you
did plan your life out like that, you would have been dead and gone
(26:23):
to heaven like literally, Like Iremember, you know, my wife telling
me that because I was a bigplanner and I thought, you know,
it had to be done a certainway. But I think that's another thing
that condition of this world say,yeah, society has messed it up.
It did. You got to bemarried by twenty five five June twenty five
(26:45):
and thirty and then after that youneed to have kids and then have this
type of job to make this muchmoney. Then bout thirty five you need
to make sure you have a home. About between thirty and thirty five,
you got to make sure you havehad like it like you and you really
start to think like, oh myGod, because I haven't, I haven't
made it this far, or I'mnot fair yet. Then you think that
you failed, and it's like God'slike, but that's not the plan I
(27:07):
even have for you. But yousaid, he's trying to make your own
little plan, and it's like,that's not the plan I have for you.
And when the Lord broke it downfor me like that, he's like,
you want everything. He's like,Brianna, you want everything to happen
now, he said, But literally, if everything happened now, then that's
your whole life and then it's timeto come home to heaven. He said.
I've literally designed your life for certainthings to happen at certain particular moments
(27:33):
in time throughout your entire life span, which means you have a full life.
Not okay, yeah, I gottado all this and then it's like
boom, I'm gone. Now somepeople listen, I ain't gonna lie.
I really do believe some people knowwhen they're gonna die. And it's like,
okay, I know, I gotthis much time left. I gotta
get I gotta get X, Yand Z together. I get that.
You know what I mean. Ifthat's between you and the Lord, it's
(27:56):
the Lord and said, listen,you only get a certain amount of years
to get X, Y and done. Then you need to get X,
Y and Z done. Okay,I'm not I'm not talking to you.
I'm talking to the majority of thepeople right who don't know, right,
And it's just like okay, I'mjust it's like God, like God said,
it's just he has things playing throughoutyour entire life. Like now we
(28:17):
know that things happen. Some peopledie strematurely, some live long lives,
and some people, you know,some people die right when some people died
young, and they were meant tolike that was just their time, right,
they were meant to just die young, right, They were only meant
to accomplish whatever little thing they weresupposed to in that little light within their
lifespan, and that was it,right, But hey, man, I
(28:38):
ain't trying to get into death.Who were just talking about that example?
But yeah, just like I said, we just wanted to bring that article
up tonight because I think it isimportant like that to me was just devastating
to hear that and definitely going tobe praying for that young girl because,
like I said, that's going tobe something that's in her head. And
(29:00):
then going forth and dating, likehow is that going to determine your relationship?
Are you going to know? Like, Okay, I don't want a
man like that. I want aman that's good. Are you going to
be attracted to men like that?Because that's what you saw, you know
what I mean? And even theother child that was hiding in the closet
because they were scared, you knowwhat I mean? Like what is what
(29:21):
is the impact on that child?Like for me, I'm always thinking like
that, like, Okay, howis this going to play out on the
next generation? Because with the devilwon't he won't to steal the next generation,
and so we have to make surethat we're fighting back and to keep
our keeping up hold of our generationright, to make sure that they're standing
(29:41):
on a firm foundation. I mean, but tonight, the scripture that we
have is coming out of First Corinthiansthirteen through four AM. We're going to
read in an amplified version. Andso it says love endoers with patience and
serenity. Love is kind and thoughtful, and it's not jealous or envious.
(30:02):
Love does not brag. It isnot proud or arrogant. It's not rude,
It is not self seeking. Itis not provoked, nor overly sensitive
and easily angered. It does nottake into account a wrong endured. It
does not rejoice at injustice, butrejoices with the truth when right in truth
(30:23):
prevailed. Love bears all things regardlessof what comes, believes all things,
looking for the best in each one, hopes all things, remaining steady fast
during difficult times, endures all thingswithout weakening. Love never fails. It
never fades nor ends. Amen.And going back to the article right,
(30:47):
I love this right here at numbersix, verse six. It is not
rejoice at injustice, but rejoices withthe truth when right in truth prevailed.
Nor is overly sensitive and easily anger. And so when you look at that,
it's like that man wasn't really showinglove. That man that doesn't even
know what love is, doesn't evenknow what love is. Not jealous of
(31:10):
envious, does not brag. It'snot proud or ericant. It is not
rude, it is not self seeking, It is not provoked. That man
doesn't know what love is. Hehasn't even have a clue what love he
is. But the truth is,if I'm being honest, I don't think
a lot of people know what lovehe is. Not that true a guy
fey love. Not that unconditional love, not true unconditional love. And I've
(31:33):
heard a lot of people talk about, you know, love should have conditions.
I used to believe in unconditional love, But no love need to have
conditions. A man mad in alie from the pit of hell. I'm
just gonna tell it to you likethat right now. Love is unconditional by
the maker, the one that madeus. He gave his unconditional love.
He gave that unconditional love when hewas hanging on that cross. That is
(31:57):
unconditional love right there. And Idon't know anybody else that can show unconditional
love like our savior. But yeah, tonight, if anybody should once loved,
you're welcome to join join him.He gives that unconditional love. But
what I will say, because I'mnot a person who's for abused, I've
heard people who stay. You know, well the man, Well, if
(32:21):
you got married to a man hewas abusing you, boy, he was
showing you some that he was abusedto before you got married. That's not
always true because some people know howto act baby, and they can hide,
they can have and they do everythinggood until you say I do,
and then after that, I justwant to go down the hill. So
you mean to tell me that thisperson who's with this person like I said,
(32:44):
like? Cause like I said,sometimes people don't be showing their true
colors. And then you didn't gotwith somebody and that person is beating you
senselessly. I'm not gonna tell youto stay. My mama didn't stay,
thank God, Praise the Lord Jesus. I'm sorry, love my daddy to
that. But I'm not one ofthem. If you beating something, because
there are women who have literally losttheir lives because they leader, they spiritual
(33:07):
leader told them that they had tostay in a relationship. There are women
who are literally losing their lives andI'm to save even some men. People
are losing their lives over that.Now that, yeah, we ain't doing
that. Are you sexually abusing achild? You know your child's being sexually
abused by a predator, your husbandor your wife as a predator. It
(33:29):
is sexually abusing your child and youknow it, and you choose to stay
and you're supposed to be a gatekeeperover that child. Wo onto you,
WEO onto you. That's all Ican say because at the end of the
day, we got we gotta pray. But once again, you know,
if people are in their closets andthey speaking to the Lord, the Lord
gonna tell you who you're supposed tobe with, who you're not gonna be
(33:50):
with. I don't believe the Lordgonna put you with somebody who's abusive,
who's gonna be beating you anyway.But you gotta be praying about that.
You gotta be speaking to the Lord. You can't just be like, oh
he looked good, he found letme get with him. And that's what
a lot of wine want. Theywant these thugs. I want this thug,
but I want him saved. Whichone you want? It's either he
gonna be saved or he's gonna bea thug. Like I'm just trying to
figure out which one easy because hecan't be both. Now, I'm not
(34:13):
saying there ain't no reform thugs outthere, but does he really want you?
I'm just saying, so that's awhole other side. Sat actually them
some good time. But anyway,y'all, that was tonight. We pray
that it blessed you like it blessedus. And like I said, if
anyone's out there that's in a abusiverelationship, I'm sorry, not sorry.
(34:38):
I'm gonna tell it to you likeit is. Run get out, save
yourself, Run save your child.If your child is being abused or harm
in any type of way, physically, sexually, whatever the situation is,
I don't even care if it's aboutyour own parents, I don't care if
it's about uncle. Whatever. Youneed to get away from that situation.
(35:01):
Don't let your family members and allthat stuff speak to you. You are
the gatekeeper over your child, soand you will be held accountable at judgment
for that. And I don't thinkpeople understand that. But anyways, all
right, y'all. We spoke alot tonight and we will see you guys
(35:22):
again next week next Thursday. Weare excited, all right, guys.
We love you with the love ofChrist. Let's go ahead and close on
prayer and we will see you nextweek. Father God, just thank you
for allowing us to come together tonight, Father God, and just hearing a
word from you Lord, in thename of Jesus, Father God, I
(35:43):
pray over everyone's marriage right now.I pray healing and restoration over marriages God,
Father God. I even pray overthe broken marriages God, Marritius that
can be healed and minded. FatherGod, we pray over them God in
the name of Jesus. For FatherGod, we even pray right now for
people who are an abuse of relationshipsGod, and they're scared and they don't
(36:05):
even know how to get out ofthe situation. God, we pray for
them, God, that you willmake a way of escape for them.
God, in the name of Jesusor Glory to God, make a way
of escape. Allow them to beprotected, God, Allow them to be
safe God from any type of dangeror harm. And Father God, we
even pray over the babies that arebeing physically abused by the God, sexually
(36:28):
abused by the God, by familymembers, by fathers, by mothers,
by uncles, by brothers, bycousins, by nephews and cousins, and
all that God and strangers. Godin the name of Jesus, we pray
over them right now, God,that you will put your loving arms around
them and begin to heal them.God in the name of Jesus, heal
(36:49):
them, God, restore them,God in the name of Jesus, and
put them in the proper care ofsomeone who will truly love them and care
for them. God in the nameof Jesus, remove them out of the
homes. God, remove the childrenout of the homes, whether being taken
advantage of God, whether there beingabused God in the name of Jesus,
(37:09):
Glory to God in the name ofJesus, Glory to God. And we
even pray over the victimizes God.We pray over their mind, God,
that their mind be renewed for theGod in the name of Jesus, that
you're creating them a clean heart.God, renew a right spirit within them.
God in the name of Jesus,allow them to come into contact with
You. Lord in the name ofJesus, allow them to have a true
(37:31):
relationship with your Father. In thename of Jesus. Glory to God,
Hallelujah, Thank your Father, Thankyour Father, Oh God, Thank you
Lord, Thank you Lord Oo God. And we pray right now tonight that
this word will will touch the peoplewho who is meant to touch and speak
(37:52):
to those people God, even intheir the quiet time, even in their
in their private time God, privateand quiet time God, when it's just
you and them God, and thetruth can set them free. Lord.
In the name of Jesus, Godand Father God. We even pray over
those abusers God who want to stopbeing abusive God, but don't know how
(38:15):
God. But Father God, weask that they just reach out to you,
Father God, and that you helpthem control that spirit of anger.
God. Rid them of the spiritof rage, Father God, rid them
of the spirit of sexual lust Godand perversion God, a sexual immorality.
God, in the name of Jesus, cleanse them, Father, sanctify them,
(38:35):
purify them, allow them to comeinto the and to know who you
are as their Lord. And saveYour Lord. Because God, we know
that you don't wish, You don'twant anyone to praerish God in the name
of Jesus, So, Father God, we pray over them now. We
pray over them now. We prayover them now, and we say thank
(38:59):
you Father, who, thank youLord, Thank you Lord. And it'sen
Jesus' name that we pray. Amen. Amen. All right, All right,
y'all, we are out. Seeyou guys next week week. Thank
(39:20):
you guys for listening to another episodeof Mary with Autism. We would love
to hear from you regarding certain topicsthat you would like to see addressed,
life changing testimonies you would like toshare or information on how you can become
against on the show. Please emailus at hippo at Married with Autism dot
com. As always, we loveyou all with the love of Christ.
Remember to keep Christ first and allthat you do, including your marriage,
(39:42):
and watch the Lord begin to transformyour life. Be blessed.
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