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March 27, 2024 • 15 mins
Want to know what it takes to make a relationship last? Listen to this episode to find out. Need dating or relationship help from Waleska? Visit the following website to get information on the different programs available: https://www.masteringdating.com

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Episode Transcript

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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome to Mastering Dating, broadcasting to eighty five countries worldwide.
With a wealth of experience as a seasoned dating coach,
your host at Mastering Dating has empowered clients globally and
now she's here to share valuable insights with you. So
sit back, relax, and get ready to dive into today's episode.

Speaker 2 (00:33):
Hi, everyone, welcome back for another episode. I'm so glad
to have you here again. Thank you for being so
supportive of my show, Mastering Dating and subscribing and coming
back week after week for a fresh episode. I really
appreciate that. I appreciate you guys. Thank you so much
for the support. Today's episode is a good episode. I'll

(00:56):
be sharing the secrets of couples who don't break up.
How do people make a relationship last a lifetime? How
do people do this? We all know that relationships are
hard and it takes work and patience and many other things,
but sometimes people aren't willing to put in the work.
And putting in the work is really important if you

(01:18):
love your partner and you want to make it last.
So with that being said, let's get started. One of
the most important factors that a couple must have in
order to make a relationship. Last is the ability to
say I'm sorry, the ability to apologize, the ability to stop,

(01:45):
and to be able to have that self awareness where
one recognizes that they were wrong for something, or they
said something they shouldn't have said, and to be able
to look at their partner and say, I'm sorry, I
shouldn't have said that, or I'm sorry I shouldn't have
done that. That's probably one of the most not probably,
but is one of the most important qualities that a

(02:07):
couple should have. Okay, I said factors earlier. I meant
to say qualities. The second thing is the ability to
not just apologize, but the ability to forgive and move on.
That's really important too. To be able to release the anger,

(02:28):
the frustration, the aggravation, whatever it is that you're feeling,
whatever your partner made you feel because of that argument
that you had or whatever the situation was. The ability
to let go, let go of any grudges that you feel.
This is very important if you plan on staying with
your partner. This is critical if you plan on making
it work with your partner. You must be able to

(02:50):
not just forgive, but let go, let go of the crutches,
don't hold on to them. Another very important thing that
people tend to do in a relationship because it gets
so worked up when they are in a heated conversation
or argument or fight. They get so worked up that
they tend to just make these assumptions about their partner's

(03:14):
feelings rather than ask. Don't assume that your partner feels
a certain way. Don't assume that your partner did something.
Ask ask how they feel, find out what they did exactly,
get your information, get your research done. Do not just
make an assumption. Okay, it's very important. And this goes

(03:37):
on to the next one. It's very important that you
as a couple stand together and you do not allow
any outside influences to affect your relationship. I've seen this
a lot. I have seen many cases of couples telling me,
either the husband or the wife or the boyfriend or girlfriend.

(04:00):
They come to me and they tell me, But my
mom said that I shouldn't go to that with him,
or my dad said that that's not a good idea,
or my best friend said that he's not a good
guy for saying that. YadA, YadA, YadA. Do not allow
outsiders to call the shots in your relationship. To make
the decisions in your relationship. Now, there's a difference getting

(04:22):
advice from your loved ones. That's wonderful, there's nothing wrong
with that. Go for that absolutely, But allowing others to
make the decision in your relationship is not okay. You
should not allow that. You and your partner are one couple.
Your mother, your father, your cousin, your sister, your best
friend are not in the relationship. Do not allow them

(04:44):
to make the decisions in the relationship. Okay. Another thing
which is so important, and I see this happening a
lot in today's dating scene, even in marriages. You see it,
and it's such a sad thing. As stop playing games. Guys,
don't play games. It is so immature, it's so yesterday.

(05:05):
It was the thing to do when we were all
in high school. Nobody does that anymore. Don't play games.
Just don't do it. If you play games, you're just
going to end up hurting each other. You're going to
confuse each other, You're going to hurt each other. It's
just not worth it. Let go of the games. Be mature,
speak up, speak your mind, but in a respectful way. Okay.

(05:26):
Another very important quality that a couple should have. And
this is crucial, and unfortunately, I have seen this happening
a lot in relationships where the couple does not make
any time at all for physical affection, cuddling, hugging, kissing,
for play, sex. It's all important. I've seen couples say, oh,

(05:50):
we don't need it. We've been married for ten years.
I don't want to do that anymore with my wife.
I don't want to do that with my husband. He's
like my best friend. It's so weird to have sex
with him. So I've heard so many different stories, so
many different things from people, from clients. It doesn't matter.
The bottom line is it's important. I don't care if

(06:10):
your husband feels like your best friend. If your wife
feels like your best friend, that's a good thing. Guys,
that is a good thing. You're so lucky if you
have a spouse who feels like a best friend, fantastic.
Just add a little romance to the mix and you'll
be okay to go. That's wonderful. That means that there's
a strong foundation. But the problem is that even with
a strong foundation of friendship, if you don't have physical

(06:33):
affection in the relationship, eventually it's more like your roommates,
and maybe you have children together too. I don't know,
but that's important. Physical affection is really important. The moment
that you stop hugging your partner, stop kissing, stop cuddling,
stop having sex with your partner, that's usually when things
start to happen, problems start to happen. So don't allow

(06:55):
it to get to that place. Okay, I won't spend
to myuch time talking about this, but there's so much
more that I could say. Maybe I'll make another episode
just about the importance of physical affection. Yes, I'll do
that in the next episode. Okay, so let's go on.
I want you to do this. I don't care if
you have been with your partner for twenty years. Take

(07:19):
your partner out on a date somewhere. Date night is
so important, especially in relationships that have been going on
for a long time. Keep the magic alive, guys, you
must keep it alive. Treat date night like a special, beautiful,
romantic occasion. And it doesn't necessarily have to be romantic

(07:40):
per se. You could go to a ballgame with your
partner if that's what they like too. It doesn't have
to be romantic necessarily, but you must have date night together.
No children, no friends, no, none of that. Just you
and your partner and that's it. Okay. Another important thing
that couples who last a long time have is that

(08:01):
they don't blame each other. They don't play that game.
They don't stand there saying it's his fault, it's her fault.
She did this, he did this. Stop it. You're not
five years old. Put your finger down. You're not five
years old. You don't need to do that. Be respectful,
be loving, be honest. You can state your concerns. You
can state whatever is bothering you without blaming your partner.

(08:25):
That's not necessary. Okay. Another really important quality that couples
that last a long time have is that they are
willing to sacrifice. There is nothing worse than dating someone
who doesn't want to ever make sacrifices for you. It's
a two way street, guys. You can't expect your partner
to sacrifice things for you if you're not going to

(08:46):
sacrifice things for them. Right, two way street. Okay, let's
keep going. Very important as well is that you always
have time for cuddling. This goes into the physical affection category,
but cuddle is different from sex. Cuddle is something that
should be happening every day, Yes, every day. Sex does

(09:10):
not need to happen every day. Cuddling, yes it does.
And I know we're busy. I know we all work,
and I know we all have children, or some of
us have children, not all of us, but we're busy,
or I know that it seems like sometimes you just
don't want to do it because you're too tired, you're aggravated,
you had a bad day at work, and your best
friend is angry at you. Your mother has a lot
of problems, and you're worried. I know there's always a reason.

(09:32):
This is called life. There's always life. If you allow
life to always get in the way and prevent you
from being the best partner that you can be to
your partner, guess what, your relationship will not last. So
push life to the side and be there for your partner.
Spend time cuddling every single day. My favorite time to
cuddle is at night, right before bed. I love to

(09:55):
cuddle at night. I love to hold my partner at
night before I close my eyes and go to bed.
I think it's amazing. And hey, if you have time
and the willingness and the desire to have sex. That's
even better. Go for it, right, cuddling sex, that's all
great stuff. Go get a snack from the refrigerator after too.
Why not? Okay? Another really important thing is that you

(10:16):
treat your partner equally. Woman is not better, man is
not better. You are both equal. You can't take sides, Okay.
You each add something beautiful to the relationship. You each
help each other grow. You're each different. That's what's beautiful
about a relationship. That's what's absolutely gorgeous about a man
and a woman coming together. All of the different colors

(10:39):
that you unite, all of the it's like a rainbow.
You bring all these different colors to the mix. That's
absolutely gorgeous. Be proud of that, and don't play who's equal,
who's better than the other. Don't play that game. Okay,
let's keep going. I really think one of the most
amazing things in the world are surprised as I love

(11:00):
it when my partner surprises me. I love getting roses,
like the delivery guy bringing me roses and I don't
know who it is. I mean, obviously I know who
it is because it's my partner, probably right, But I
love getting surprises for my partner. Roses, delivered love letters,
little chocolates, a little surprised. I don't know. Maybe he

(11:22):
comes home and he has a beautiful dress he bought
me on his way home from work. He saw it
in the shop and he picked it up for me
and brought it home. Maybe he cleaned the kitchen for
me that night. Maybe he cooked me a romantic dinner.
I don't know. It could be anything, but I love surprises,
and I don't know many people who don't. So show appreciation.
Surprise your partner. Thoughtful, cute little surprises are awesome. It's

(11:46):
what keeps the romance going alive. Alive, guys, so go
for it. Okay. Another very important thing is that no
matter what, you're always there for each other, no matter what.
I kind of describe this a little bit like a
compare it a little bit too like my relationship with
my sister. For example, we don't always get along, we're

(12:08):
night and day, we're very different, but if it came
to it, she's always going to have my support. I'm
always going to have her back no matter what. She
is my sister and I love her no matter what,
and I will always make sure that she knows that
I love her and if she needs me, I am
there for her. Even if we have differences, even if
we argue from time to time, like sisters sometimes do. Whatever,

(12:31):
the important thing is that you're there for each other. Well,
a relationship which is romantic is the same thing. Sometimes
you're not going to agree. Sometimes you're going to aggravate
each other. Sometimes you're not going to want to be
in the same room. You know what doesn't matter. You
have to be there for each other always, no matter what.
Which takes me to the next one on my list.

(12:51):
Never ever leave your home without letting them know that
you love them. That is so important. When I lost
my father unexpectedly, all I could think, and I still
think about it to this day. I lost him only
one year ago, so it's pretty fresh, but I still
think about it to this day. If only I would

(13:13):
have said I love you to him one more time.
I remember the morning he left the apartment. I was
in his apartment when he left that morning. I remember
the last five seconds that I saw my dad and
I didn't say I love you to him, And I
wish more than anything in the world that I would
have hugged him and said I love you. So tell
your partner that you love them. Tell them that even

(13:35):
if you're going to see them at five pm that day,
even if you're going to meet them at lunch during
your lunch break, don't leave your home without telling your
partner that you love them, even if you're angry at
each other. Do not leave unless you say I love you.
And that's important. Guys. What if something happens. You could
get into a car accident or they could You never know.
Life is difficult sometimes, life sucks sometimes, and it throws

(13:59):
these curveballs us that we don't expect. So make sure
your partner knows that you love them no matter what,
even if you don't agree with what they said that day. Okay,
So I think these are all very important, important qualities
that every couple who wants to have a long lasting
relationship should have. Keep these in mind. Let me know

(14:21):
if you agree. I'm going to open up a poll
here on Spotify. You can only see it on Spotify
if you use this for listening to my podcast, but
let me know. I'm going to open up a poll
and ask you, guys what you thought about this, so
that you can tell me whether or not this episode
was helpful, and guys, I want to meet you. I
want to know who you are. Come to my Instagram

(14:43):
account mastering dating, follow me, reach out to me, let
me know that you listen to my podcast. Please note
that sometimes a lot of my messages go straight to
the spam folder and I don't see them until it's
too late and they've been deleted, So please don't take
it personally. If I do, I won't respond. It just
means that I didn't see the message. But if I
see your message, I promise it. I will write back

(15:05):
and I will follow you back if you want me to. Okay,
I love you guys. You got this. I believe in you.
You can do it. Okay. Whatever it is that you're
going through right now in life and relationships and dating,
in your marriage, whatever whatever's going on, I believe in
you and I know that you got this. Okay. I
love you, guys, and I'll see you next time.
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