September 29, 2025 • 12 mins
Join my Patreon for exclusive content! / methodswitch ◆ ---------------------{ ◈ }--------------------- ◆ Neighbor: @CloverSaysHi Your neighbor is out of the hospital and you insist (more like demand) that your yandere hellhound bodyguard go and apologize. That's definitely not something she's used to doing, so naturally something goes terribly wrong. ◆ ---------------------{ ◈ }--------------------- ◆ Written by: MethodSwitch ◆ ---------------------{ ◈ }--------------------- ◆ Thumbnail: Midjourney ◆ ---------------------{ ◈ }--------------------- ◆ Become A Member: / @methodswitch Patreon: / methodswitch Merch: https://methodswitch.net Links: https://methodswitch.carrd.co/ ◆ ---------------------{ ◈ }--------------------- ◆ #ff4m #asmrroleplay #hellhound #yandere
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:02):
Come on, now, why do I have to do this again.
It's not like I harmed her that badly. She walked
right outside of that hospital. That's more than others can say. Oh,
the semantics walked wheeled. It doesn't matter. She's free now.
(00:27):
You know, you keep having this funny notion that I
was in the wrong, But I highly doubt that. And besides,
if I was so in the wrong, why did I
win the fight? Clearly my argument held a lot more
weight than hers. I am far superior. Are you sure
(00:52):
that's not how that works? Oh? My god, the human
world is so topsy turvy. God. First, you can't impale
your neighbor with a spike because that's wrong. Then you
can't break into your neighbor's house because you suspected that
they stole something from you. What is the big deal? Now,
(01:16):
I'm not blaming you, baby, like you are my everything.
You're not the one who caused these rules to exist.
But whoever did? What do you mean? No, it's not
like I'm gonna do anything that bad. Ugh, I mean
gnawing on someone's leg? Is that really that bad? Yeah? How?
(01:46):
Oh god, damn it. You can't have shit on earth?
Whatever let's just get this over with. Hello. Yeah, hi,
(02:06):
I'm the hell hell that malder the other day, like
a week ago, and my owner is telling me that
I need to apologize to you because that was wrong.
Oh sorry, okay, what I did was wrong? So do
you accept my apology? Well, but this doesn't sound like
(02:30):
a real apology. Look, babe, this was not my idea.
Oh my owner is the one that thinks you deserve
an apology. Okay, which you don't excuse me? How dare you?
If I never saw your face again? I would be
so happy, sir? Can you please do something about your dog? Hey? Hey,
(02:51):
now you do not talk to him? Okay, you look
at me and you talk to me only that is
what got you in trouble the first time. Bitch, who Well,
you leave or I'm calling the police. Oh yeah, call
the police. We'll have such a fandabby dozy day. I
promise you I'll make that fight last time look like
(03:12):
fucking child's play. So I think that went pretty well,
don't you think? What? Oh, give me a break, don't
(03:32):
give me that. Look. It's literally impossible for me to
genuinely apologize to anybody besides you. They don't deserve it.
You know how much I hate humans once again? Besides you,
they just they irk me. Yeah, the people in hell
(03:57):
irk me too, but especially humans. I don't know what
it is about you, but you're just really different and
I really can't explain it beyond that. Look, I'm sorry
that I am the way that I am, and then
(04:19):
I'm like extremely obsessive and possessive of you, But I
can't change the way that I am. Next time, however,
I will try to be a little bit more calm.
I guess this is the right word. Yeah, next time.
(04:44):
Did you really think this was going to be a
one time thing? Do you know? Me? Baby? The love
of my life? You are with? How do I say?
A very crazy bitch? Like super crazy? At first it
(05:07):
was very hard to admit, but over time I've come
to accept it. I probably shouldn't, but I don't have
much of a choice now, do I. Besides it makes
me very good at my job, which is to protect
your sexy ass, Yeah, from actual threats and potential ones too.
(05:36):
If a potential threat is in your face, how am
I supposed to protect you? It's far better to get
them at a distance. Oh, I'm not implying anything by that,
no way. But I do potentially know how to use
(05:57):
a sniper rifle. Well, I used to have ties with
the mafia, and well you can't just leave the mafia
without having to go through some stuff, the stuff being death.
So yeah, it's a long story, it really is. But
I'm safe, I'm here, and the mafia is no longer existent,
(06:21):
So don't be afraid of me. I mean, look at
the positive. I can protect you in any way, shape
or form, whether I'm close range or long range, I
can do it all. I am the jack of all trades. Yeah,
(06:46):
I'm crazy, We established that already. I'm crazy in love
with you, though. Now that has to count for something, right,
as long as I don't put you in my basement. Well,
first of all, I don't own a basement, and second
(07:07):
of all, even if I did, I hypothetically put you
down there, it's not like you would have hated. I'd
make sure it's alf furnished. You have technology, you have
good working internet, you have decent food to eat. I'm
not some type of monster. Well technically I am, but
not in the cruel sense completely. Either way, The point
(07:34):
is I would never do such a thing. Unless I
was really compelled to do so with a really well
thought argument that was manifesting in my brain. Can we
talk about something else, like how we should probably no,
(07:54):
definitely never run into your neighbor ever again, Well, you
do want me to be on my best behavior? Right
then you may want to consider moving out of this
apartment complex. I'll be honest with you, baby, she's kinda
(08:15):
on my imaginary list already, and she's never going to
go like I'm going to be dreaming about her staring
at you again. And ooh, you may not want to
sleep near me for a couple days, just in case
I start clawing. You know how bad that can get.
(08:38):
I don't mean to do it. It's like a reflex.
While I'm sleeping, I really get animated in my dreams.
You should really consider getting me a straight jacket when
I go to sleep. Straight jackets are fun. Don't knock
it till you try it. Oh, that's a whole nother
(08:59):
story that I should probably never tell you about. You'd
think I'm crazy or something, and I'm not crazy. Well,
not like that, you know technicalities here and there. It's
just that I did some things that ended with me
wearing a straight jacket for longer than a year. I
(09:20):
promise you I can be trusted near you Others, My
track record isn't so good. You know, the best way
to make sure that nobody ever gets harmed by me
again is for you to never go outside again. You
(09:41):
don't have to, but I'm just telling you the truth.
There seems to be some form of correlation between you
going outside and people getting injured me going outside. Yeah,
but I'm a dog. I have to go outside. The
squirrels in this neighborhood have had it too easy for
(10:04):
too long. Baby. The squirrels deserve it, though, Look at them,
look at them in the eyes, and tell me they
don't deserve it. It's better the squirrels than other humans.
But I don't think I'll have to be worrying too
much about these squirrels for too long. You and I
(10:27):
need to move out of here before the human authorities
get us. You can't just move willia nilly, baby, You
have never been so wrong in all of your life.
Check this out? Impressive? Right that right? There is a
(10:49):
direct portal to Hell hop on in ah. Let me
put it this way. Would you rather go and stay
in Hell with me? Or would you rather bring Hell
to Earth and watch all the humans get destroyed by me?
Hell is overdue for an uprising, and I'm yonder enough
(11:10):
to do it solo. No, No, you don't have to
worry about me putting you in a basement. Once again,
I don't own a basement. I can get one made,
but that's so old school. We have new options now.
I could just make a pocket dimension that you could
never leave. Now that's that could work out pretty well. Hmm. Hey,
(11:39):
now you're the one who brought it up, not me,
you know. If I must be honest, it seems like
you're trying to give me hints as to what to
do with you. I never brought up a basement. I
think you like the way that I am. I don't
(12:00):
know why you have such a hard time admitting it.
All right, then I won't put you in a basement.
I definitely won't put you in a pocket dimension and
have you all to myself, But I will make you
(12:22):
mine forever. Who wants a human enters they can't escape,
And with how horrible Hell is, I doubt you'll ever
want to go outside without me, or go outside at all.
(12:46):
How lucky are you now? Come here,
Come on, now, why do I have to do this again.
It's not like I harmed her that badly. She walked
right outside of that hospital. That's more than others can say. Oh,
the semantics walked wheeled. It doesn't matter. She's free now.
(00:27):
You know, you keep having this funny notion that I
was in the wrong, But I highly doubt that. And besides,
if I was so in the wrong, why did I
win the fight? Clearly my argument held a lot more
weight than hers. I am far superior. Are you sure
(00:52):
that's not how that works? Oh? My god, the human
world is so topsy turvy. God. First, you can't impale
your neighbor with a spike because that's wrong. Then you
can't break into your neighbor's house because you suspected that
they stole something from you. What is the big deal? Now,
(01:16):
I'm not blaming you, baby, like you are my everything.
You're not the one who caused these rules to exist.
But whoever did? What do you mean? No, it's not
like I'm gonna do anything that bad. Ugh, I mean
gnawing on someone's leg? Is that really that bad? Yeah? How?
(01:46):
Oh god, damn it. You can't have shit on earth?
Whatever let's just get this over with. Hello. Yeah, hi,
(02:06):
I'm the hell hell that malder the other day, like
a week ago, and my owner is telling me that
I need to apologize to you because that was wrong.
Oh sorry, okay, what I did was wrong? So do
you accept my apology? Well, but this doesn't sound like
(02:30):
a real apology. Look, babe, this was not my idea.
Oh my owner is the one that thinks you deserve
an apology. Okay, which you don't excuse me? How dare you?
If I never saw your face again? I would be
so happy, sir? Can you please do something about your dog? Hey? Hey,
(02:51):
now you do not talk to him? Okay, you look
at me and you talk to me only that is
what got you in trouble the first time. Bitch, who Well,
you leave or I'm calling the police. Oh yeah, call
the police. We'll have such a fandabby dozy day. I
promise you I'll make that fight last time look like
(03:12):
fucking child's play. So I think that went pretty well,
don't you think? What? Oh, give me a break, don't
(03:32):
give me that. Look. It's literally impossible for me to
genuinely apologize to anybody besides you. They don't deserve it.
You know how much I hate humans once again? Besides you,
they just they irk me. Yeah, the people in hell
(03:57):
irk me too, but especially humans. I don't know what
it is about you, but you're just really different and
I really can't explain it beyond that. Look, I'm sorry
that I am the way that I am, and then
(04:19):
I'm like extremely obsessive and possessive of you, But I
can't change the way that I am. Next time, however,
I will try to be a little bit more calm.
I guess this is the right word. Yeah, next time.
(04:44):
Did you really think this was going to be a
one time thing? Do you know? Me? Baby? The love
of my life? You are with? How do I say?
A very crazy bitch? Like super crazy? At first it
(05:07):
was very hard to admit, but over time I've come
to accept it. I probably shouldn't, but I don't have
much of a choice now, do I. Besides it makes
me very good at my job, which is to protect
your sexy ass, Yeah, from actual threats and potential ones too.
(05:36):
If a potential threat is in your face, how am
I supposed to protect you? It's far better to get
them at a distance. Oh, I'm not implying anything by that,
no way. But I do potentially know how to use
(05:57):
a sniper rifle. Well, I used to have ties with
the mafia, and well you can't just leave the mafia
without having to go through some stuff, the stuff being death.
So yeah, it's a long story, it really is. But
I'm safe, I'm here, and the mafia is no longer existent,
(06:21):
So don't be afraid of me. I mean, look at
the positive. I can protect you in any way, shape
or form, whether I'm close range or long range, I
can do it all. I am the jack of all trades. Yeah,
(06:46):
I'm crazy, We established that already. I'm crazy in love
with you, though. Now that has to count for something, right,
as long as I don't put you in my basement. Well,
first of all, I don't own a basement, and second
(07:07):
of all, even if I did, I hypothetically put you
down there, it's not like you would have hated. I'd
make sure it's alf furnished. You have technology, you have
good working internet, you have decent food to eat. I'm
not some type of monster. Well technically I am, but
not in the cruel sense completely. Either way, The point
(07:34):
is I would never do such a thing. Unless I
was really compelled to do so with a really well
thought argument that was manifesting in my brain. Can we
talk about something else, like how we should probably no,
(07:54):
definitely never run into your neighbor ever again, Well, you
do want me to be on my best behavior? Right
then you may want to consider moving out of this
apartment complex. I'll be honest with you, baby, she's kinda
(08:15):
on my imaginary list already, and she's never going to
go like I'm going to be dreaming about her staring
at you again. And ooh, you may not want to
sleep near me for a couple days, just in case
I start clawing. You know how bad that can get.
(08:38):
I don't mean to do it. It's like a reflex.
While I'm sleeping, I really get animated in my dreams.
You should really consider getting me a straight jacket when
I go to sleep. Straight jackets are fun. Don't knock
it till you try it. Oh, that's a whole nother
(08:59):
story that I should probably never tell you about. You'd
think I'm crazy or something, and I'm not crazy. Well,
not like that, you know technicalities here and there. It's
just that I did some things that ended with me
wearing a straight jacket for longer than a year. I
(09:20):
promise you I can be trusted near you Others, My
track record isn't so good. You know, the best way
to make sure that nobody ever gets harmed by me
again is for you to never go outside again. You
(09:41):
don't have to, but I'm just telling you the truth.
There seems to be some form of correlation between you
going outside and people getting injured me going outside. Yeah,
but I'm a dog. I have to go outside. The
squirrels in this neighborhood have had it too easy for
(10:04):
too long. Baby. The squirrels deserve it, though, Look at them,
look at them in the eyes, and tell me they
don't deserve it. It's better the squirrels than other humans.
But I don't think I'll have to be worrying too
much about these squirrels for too long. You and I
(10:27):
need to move out of here before the human authorities
get us. You can't just move willia nilly, baby, You
have never been so wrong in all of your life.
Check this out? Impressive? Right that right? There is a
(10:49):
direct portal to Hell hop on in ah. Let me
put it this way. Would you rather go and stay
in Hell with me? Or would you rather bring Hell
to Earth and watch all the humans get destroyed by me?
Hell is overdue for an uprising, and I'm yonder enough
(11:10):
to do it solo. No, No, you don't have to
worry about me putting you in a basement. Once again,
I don't own a basement. I can get one made,
but that's so old school. We have new options now.
I could just make a pocket dimension that you could
never leave. Now that's that could work out pretty well. Hmm. Hey,
(11:39):
now you're the one who brought it up, not me,
you know. If I must be honest, it seems like
you're trying to give me hints as to what to
do with you. I never brought up a basement. I
think you like the way that I am. I don't
(12:00):
know why you have such a hard time admitting it.
All right, then I won't put you in a basement.
I definitely won't put you in a pocket dimension and
have you all to myself, But I will make you
(12:22):
mine forever. Who wants a human enters they can't escape,
And with how horrible Hell is, I doubt you'll ever
want to go outside without me, or go outside at all.
(12:46):
How lucky are you now? Come here,
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