April 14, 2025 • 41 mins
The Midlife Crisisses are back! On today's episode, Tyson Apostol (@tysonapostol) Bradley Hasemayer (@bhaz) and William Drumm (@williamdrumm) dive deep on how to identify you're in a crisis.
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Midlife Crisisses (@midlifecrisisses)
Tyson Apostol (@tysonapostol),
Bradley Hasemeyer (@bhaz),
and William Drumm (@williamdrumm)
Got a question for us?
Send it to - midlifecrisisses@gmail.com!
Follow us on our social media!
Midlife Crisisses (@midlifecrisisses)
Tyson Apostol (@tysonapostol),
Bradley Hasemeyer (@bhaz),
and William Drumm (@williamdrumm)
Got a question for us?
Send it to - midlifecrisisses@gmail.com!
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Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome back to Midlife Crisises. I'm Tyson, one of the hosts.
Thank you so much for liking, subscribing, commenting, sharing all
of that stuff helps us continue to do this podcast,
and we would appreciate if you would continue to do
that each and every episode.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
We love you guys so much.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
We want to keep doing this and that is one
of the ways to guarantee, I mean nothing at.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
That guarantee then we will keep doing this.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
So smash that subscribe button, that like button, that follow button,
whatever buttons are there, smash them all.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
And we really want to hear for you guys too.
We want to hear about your midlife crisises. We want
to know what kind of stuff you are going through
so that we can talk about it and share our
insights about trying to survive. This quote as well. So
let's get into it. How do you know that you're
going through a midlife crisis? Was there like a certain moment,
(00:55):
a certain epiphany where you realize that you're in the
middle of a midlife crisis.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
I can't just hit reset because I can't stop paying
my mortgage when I am going through that. I'm not
like this is a crisis but then when I step back,
I'm like, oh, okay, I'm in a slum.
Speaker 4 (01:10):
I feel like the crisis is like people point to
it as like a moment, but I think it's almost
like a storm. I think you should be questioning a
little bit about your life, but that doesn't have to
be at forty or forty five or fifty.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Welcome back to the Midlife Crisises podcast. We talk all
things midlife crisis, what we're going through, how we're executing,
and whether or not it's working for us. I'm one
of the co hosts, Tyson Apostle here with my other
two co hosts Bradley.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
What's up?
Speaker 4 (01:37):
True? That's true, man, I got to tell you I've
got some slight crisis is going on right now. I
just got I got a gold chain. I don't know
do I wear it in, do I wear it out?
I'm sure we'll get to that later. There's more pressing matters.
I live in Atlanta, Georgia, father of a couple of kids,
just trying to figure things out myself, content creator, run
my own business that has its hies and lows and
(01:59):
all that kind of stuff as well. But I love
being on here. Make sure you guys are liking and
subscribing to the show. We've already started getting some It's
not fan mail because it's not male, but we get
some comments and some dms on our Instagram at Midlife Crisises.
Make sure you go and follow us there as well.
But I'm excited because William sent us a video the
other day and he seemed like he was he was
(02:19):
feeling pretty good. He was feeling himself with his new
haircut and his shoes. So I'm excited for what that's
generated inside of him. For a question today, So William,
what's up? Man?
Speaker 3 (02:29):
A haircut is important and I am loving it, So
you're great. Got a pair of Jordan's too, And I
got a pair of Jordans for my daughter, So like, yeah,
we're starting it off pretty good.
Speaker 4 (02:39):
Are they matching?
Speaker 3 (02:41):
No, HER's a pink close enough?
Speaker 4 (02:44):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (02:45):
And nice Bradley's midlife crisis shoe.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
Absolutely, I've got three now and I'm good. Get a
lot more.
Speaker 4 (02:53):
Yes, Yes, buying happiness.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
Bradley is not joking about the chain being a midlife
crisis for him. There's been many emails chains about him,
all kinds of difficulties. The thickness the length. Yeah inside
outside so real for you, Bradley.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
Yeah, my professional opinion, and I don't it's not an insult.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
Okay. It's short enough.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
Yeah, and it's thin enough that you can wear it
on the outside like that.
Speaker 4 (03:26):
Okay that I can, you can, You've got yeah, right.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
It felt versatile with kind of this, like the black
shirt and the denim or whatever. I was like, all right,
it does feel a little nineties boy band, but I'm
okay with that.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Yeah, that's what we're all getting back into.
Speaker 3 (03:42):
Yeah, the chain gang approves.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
The chain gang approves.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
So my question today is I was thinking of what
we wanted to talk about today, and I was thinking of,
you know, the big mid life crisis that I've been
going through in the last year. I recently got divorced
last May, and I'm a single daughter to a four
year old. So it's been a.
Speaker 4 (04:04):
Lot of single dad to a daughter. You're not a single.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
Daughter, yeah, every one. And I'm a single dad to
a four year old, so a lot of adjusting and
that's why kind of we started this podcast in some ways,
so it's been reallythartic for me. But my question today is,
how do you know that you're going through a midlife crisis,
and was there like a certain moment, a certain epiphany
(04:31):
where you realize that you're in the middle of a
midlife crisis, And like for other people who are out there,
what kind of thoughts behaviors might be somewhat of a
symptom or a give you a hint that, yeah, you're
probably going through some sort of a mid life crisis there,
because I've been through too now when I was thinking
(04:51):
about this what I'm going through now, and then there's
one that happened a while ago. I don't know, but
maybe quarter life crisis or whatever, and they came from
really different places, and I realized that they were happening
at different times and really different scenarios. So I thought
it would be cool to talk about that with my
experience and then also kind of listen to what you
(05:14):
guys how you kind of know, and hopefully get some
audience feedback too about kind of what their wake up
moment was where they realized, Hey, I'm going through something here.
Speaker 4 (05:26):
I'm going to actually see what chat GPT says are the.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
Signs of a crisis.
Speaker 4 (05:33):
So yeah, so Tyson, while I'm doing that, you can
talk if you will.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
I mean for me, I've never had like a moment
where I was like everything's broken, Like that's never or like,
but the moments that I have are everything is overwhelming
right now and I can't just hit reset because I
can't stop paying my mortgage for six months because I
(05:58):
just don't want to. I can't do any of that stuff.
So then it's like a weird hole that you're in
of like I gotta run everybody around town. Then I've
got to do then I gotta pay all the bills.
Oh and more bills just keep coming in, and I
don't want to exercise anymore because I'm not motivated to
(06:19):
do that. I just want to sit on the couch
and not pay any of the bills. And for me,
I've never like when I am going through that, I'm
not like this is a crisis. But then when I
step back and look at it from try to be
like a third party view of what I'm doing, I'm like, oh, Okay,
I'm in a slump. So for me personally, my midlife
(06:43):
things are more of just slumpy moments in my life
where I'm just overwhelmed by having to or feeling like
I'm having to do too much. But I've never had
a catastrophic I hadn't yet. I haven't had a cat
traffic midlife incident where the wheels just came off and
(07:07):
I had a corvette that has.
Speaker 4 (07:10):
I also think the crisis is, you know, so stereotypical.
And I'll tell you what chat Gipt has to say
in a second. But I feel like the crisis is
like people point to it as like a moment, but
I think it's almost like a storm, and like the
storm like ebbs and flows a little bit, right, Like
we're just in a moment where you know, I'll look
outside and be like sprinkling, and then twenty minutes later,
(07:31):
like the wind is howling and the rain is pouring,
and then it slows up a little bit, and it's
just it's kind of like, at least for me, there's
like an ebb and flow of it. And that's why
I think you can have a quarter life crisis without
like a major thing happening. You don't have to have
have had like someone close to you die to create
this moment or to have you get in a wreck
(07:52):
and now you're paralyzed. Quarter life crisis I think it
comes out of a lot of internal that would be identity.
That would be a huge crisis.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
This is nature crisis.
Speaker 4 (08:01):
Yeaheah, just keeping it positive, all right.
Speaker 3 (08:03):
So here's what That's a good analogy though. I like
that storm analogy. That's good.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Yeah, And I was even gonna I add onto that
natural disasters. It could be an earthquake that's catastrophic, could
also be a typhoon, could be of.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Fires throughout fire, wildfire wars.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
Like we're just brainstorming natural causes and disasters.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
It's great.
Speaker 4 (08:25):
Yeah, Okay, Chad Gpt the theologian philosopher, here's the top ten. Okay,
so here's what I here's the prompt, give me a
short list of ten signs that a man is going
through a midlife crisis with scientific backing. It's saying a
midlife crisis can manifest in different ways, driven by psychological
and biological changes. Here are the ten signs backed by
(08:47):
research and psychology and behavioral science. Number one sudden obsession
with appearance. All of a sudden, you care about what
you look like. Increase changes in grooming fashion. Number two
a drastic career change. You quit a lot held job,
you're seeking a totally different career path because you're not satisfied. Yeah,
and there is the previous with American Psychological Association's hard
(09:08):
Harvard Business Review. I'm not going to give you all
of them, but there's backing here. Folk impulsive spending, making
an irrational financial decision, buying expensive cars or luxury items.
Increased risk taking, engaging in reckless behaviors like gambling, excessive drinking,
or talking a lot with tyson. Number five dissatisfaction in relationships,
(09:31):
questioning long term relationships are suddenly seeking new romantic partners.
Depression or anxiety. I think you were talking about that
a little bit. Mood swings, feelings of emptiness, or existential dread.
It's a great name for a podcast, too. Yeah, let's
see number seven. Nostalgia and regret frequently reminiscing about your
youth or regretting your past life choices. You coming up, buddy,
(09:53):
Come on. Number eight. Feeling trapped and craving independent of
This is desire for freedom. I got to get out
of here, and I'm feeling trapped and craving independence. Number
nine unusual fatigue or health concerns. You're becoming hyper aware
of aging and physical deterioration. And number ten new hobbies
(10:14):
or radical changes and interests, developing unexpected passions.
Speaker 2 (10:20):
Researching World War Two?
Speaker 1 (10:21):
Isn't that the popular one where like, all of a sudden,
I'm buying World War two history books.
Speaker 4 (10:30):
My dad with World War two histories, submarines. He's reading
about like the like the Japanese generals writing autobiographies. This
is a first hand account of a pilot who was stranded.
I'm like, Okay, what happened? Like, yeah, he's always like.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
Or is that just getting old?
Speaker 4 (10:50):
So that's what I was gonna say, because a lot
of these things I don't think are necessarily bad. I
think you should be questioning a little bit about your life.
But that doesn't have to be at forty or forty
five or fifty. Yeah, but maybe if you've got a
good friend and all of a sudden, you know, you
start seeing some of those extreme moments happen. Maybe maybe
the extremity. Extremity, yeah, the extremness. I don't know what the.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
Words I think when you're listening to this list, when
I'm listening to it, the word that comes up is dissatisfaction.
How you look with your health, yeah, your finances, with
your job, with your relationship with your family, with your friends. Yeah,
that's what it comes down to.
Speaker 4 (11:31):
Like, so we've got an ax to grind face on
those and.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
It's a recognition of that. So it's realizing.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
So that's the moment where you're just like, I don't
like that or that or that or that. Is there
something better on all of those? Let me find out?
Speaker 4 (11:48):
Yeah, And maybe the midlifeness of it is the well,
am I going to just keep doing this for the
rest of my life? You know, like the idea that
like maybe I don't have that much longer. Do I
want to stay in this dissatisfied position or do I
make a change?
Speaker 2 (12:04):
Right? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (12:05):
And for me, I think we've kind of talked about
this in previous episode, but it's like the external versus
the internal sources of what's going on in your life,
because I think that a lot of the things on
that list and where you're talking about are like more internal, like, hey,
I'm dissatisfied with this relationship. I feel weird, Whereas the
(12:29):
one that I went through I'm going through now was
because things were done to me. So this could be
it could have been like an illness, it could have
been a death in the family. It could be a
divorce and like that of it, Yeah yeah, where you're
kind of thrown into the crisis verse the opposite where
it might be monotony. It might be just like feeling
(12:49):
like you're in Groundhog's Day and things are going the
same forever and you don't want it to be like
that and you want some sort of change. But I
think there's kind of like a dichotomy the two different
ways that you might end up experience a crisis. And
then I think that with the external ones, like things
that are done to you, it might be pretty obvious
to you that things are messed up, like because everything
(13:11):
in your life is getting thrown into chaos, whereas on
the other side, it might really sneak up on you.
And that's kind of what I'm asking too, is like
what is that moment where you realize when because things
can be creeping up on you for a long time
and then what is it that makes you suddenly realize,
oh shit, like this is I need to change, Like
(13:32):
this is like something's going on here, It's time for
me to do something else.
Speaker 1 (13:37):
I think on a lot of those there's just like
it's a slow build to them action mm hm, like, oh,
I hate my job.
Speaker 2 (13:45):
I hate my job. I hate my job.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
It pays fine, I can't leave, it pays fine, I
can't leave. And then your boss asks you for something
too absurd on one day and you're like.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
I'm out of here. Yeah, what are you gonna do?
Speaker 1 (13:58):
I don't know, not being here anything else here, and
then that triggers something where you go home you're like,
oh shit, dude, burn it all down.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
Now I don't have a paying job, and now I like.
Speaker 1 (14:10):
One of my and the yeah, and it's not like
you're not acting irrationally in those moments. You just need
that poke or broad to take action on that thing.
And then I think that from my perspective, that's what
I think is happening.
Speaker 3 (14:30):
But yeah, for me, when I was going through the
kind of the internal woe, when the dissatisfied I want
to blow things up, not happy with it. Well, the
biggest symptom was, or the biggest hint or whatever you
want to call it, was sleep like I wasn't able
to sleep. I never had any trouble sleeping before, and
then suddenly I'm just lying in bed like thinking about things.
(14:54):
And that got worse and worse, and then it was
like the time to like that match and blow it.
That's kind of how I The main symptom that I
recognized was the sleep part.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
Okay, and then did you have like a moment where
you just like got up after not sleeping or just.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
Like screw it, blowing it all up right now?
Speaker 3 (15:15):
Yeah, pretty much. I mean kind of a slow build,
but then yeah, yeah, you.
Speaker 4 (15:20):
Get do you guys have people in your lives who
have done that those big impulsive things, whether it is
a purchase or the quitting the job or the leaving
the family or anything like that around you. I haven't
really seen that yet, at least in my kind of
medium to close circles.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
Yeah, I haven't seen that yet. I just see the
Corvette Club drive past once in a while and that.
Speaker 4 (15:45):
There the way to the Tommy Bahama meet up.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
Yeah, but they're the old old guys who are just
like doing it socially, Yeah, I I mean part of
it too is I think you're social circle. You know
how they're like hang out with people that you are
on trajectory with the birds of a feather. And it's
(16:08):
a natural thing too. It's like I wouldn't hang out
with somebody who's just like constantly going through it. And
it's not because I wouldn't want to be supportive if
something happened. I'm I mean, but you're going through it,
but you're in control of it.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Worship.
Speaker 4 (16:22):
We're kind of sharing them movies and I are splitting
the emotional carrying will.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
But it's just wouldn't I wouldn't vibe with somebody who
was always in a panic about their life and it
blowing up and then purposely blowing up their spot every
chance they got. I just don't think that we would
ever come together tight enough that that would be my
friend group. And like my friend group will have like
a moment where you know, somebody like loses a ton
of weight because they realized they were getting out. Then
(16:51):
that type of stuff is also midlife crisis, and that
stuff's like, yeah, that's all happening. But I don't have
any buddy close to me who is just like quit
their job, bought a brand new car, did a thing,
destroyed every relationship they've ever known because they just wanted
(17:11):
like the hardest refreshed possible alienates. Everybody moves to foreign country.
Thailand would be probably where they go.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
All of it.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
Yeah, I haven't.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
Yes, I haven't, So I haven't.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
I don't know, I'm probably I don't know, I've I've
seen people like that that I'm associated with or I
wouldn't say close close friends with, where I'm like, oh, okay,
that's they're going through a thing.
Speaker 4 (17:37):
I also wonder if it Oh sorry, well go ahead.
Speaker 3 (17:40):
But I was just gonna say I think that some
of that is contagious too. So you're talking about within
friend group, losing weight. It could be, you know, buying
a new car whatever, But a lot of that is contagious.
And there's studies out there about like divorce, like the
more people you know who are divorced, the more chances
of you getting higher. Higher your chances of getting divorced are.
(18:02):
And same with you know your parents are divorced, you
have a lot of higher chances of getting divorced. But
I think there's some sort of social component too. And
it's like if you're in a friend group and then
you see your friends start blowing shit up and then
they're happier, Like, I don't know, I think that that
might be contagious too.
Speaker 4 (18:20):
Yeah, I was going to say, I think some of
it might be at least for us, as we've lived
more unique lives than just like a standard stereotypical I
worked in one job for fifteen years. I lived in
the same house. I you know, Like, I think some
of that drudgery would definitely drive me to be like,
this is it, That's all that life has to offer.
(18:41):
But I've been fortunate enough. It hasn't been easy from
any financial standpoint, but to move around a lot, meet
a lot of people, travel, you know. So I feel
like the spice of life has been kind of along
the way instead of that concept of like I'm going
to work in one job until i can retire and
then I'll have fun, you know. Then I'll start living
and people start realizing that's not guaranteed anymore either.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
And then they're just so sick of waiting for it,
and that brownhog Bay syndrome where things are just the
same for so long and then they they need to
make something happen. Then maybe it is something small, but
it could also be something really big that changes everything, Yeah,
ditching other relationships and everything.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
I also think our generation we're different than our parents.
Our parents were more like that, We'll get a corporate
job trust in the corporation.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
They always take care of you. Yeah, and then into
thirty to forty years of that wild.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
You can take a break and travel and see the
world when you're ninety. And now our generation is more hustlers,
more entrepreneurs, more people that are just like doing their
own thing on their own, getting contract jobs, stuff like
that at and so it's less. I think there's there's
(20:04):
I think I feel like when my when I was
a kid, all of my parents' friends were all like
corporate people or in some pretty standard job setting. Right now,
you can't even begin to guess what somebody does to
earn a living.
Speaker 4 (20:22):
And so I think our generation when you try to
explain it to your dad, you said, what idea?
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Yeah, or even like a grandparent, what do you do
forget that?
Speaker 1 (20:30):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Have you heard of podcasting and influencing?
Speaker 3 (20:37):
And uh, I'm still figuring out the podcast. But I
think that he's he's figured out how to listen to
him now, good, that's our podcast has done anything. It's
not my dad how to listen to podcasts, Yes, because
he came out of it was really hard for him.
Speaker 4 (20:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
We So I think our generation is different and the
kids younger than us. It's going to be even different
for them, and there's just going to be different ways
to probably execute on a midlife crisis, in different midlife
crisises in general things to crisis about. So we might
be into no man's land here with the way that
(21:18):
we function now as a society, as forty plus year
old guys who were like the front end of the
generations of just doing whatever to make a living.
Speaker 4 (21:29):
Yeah. I just looked up real quick because I was curious, like,
have the percentage of midlife crisis has changed over time?
That was through Google, and it was just saying that
the research suggests that experiencing of a significant crisis in
midlife is not as common as portrayed, and there's with
only ten to twenty percent of people reporting it, and
(21:50):
there is evidence of the perception of midlife and the
timing of life milestones are shifting. I think that's a
good point too, because what we might start seeing is
midlife crisis is happening at like because if you're not,
you know, people are getting married later, jobs are later,
financial stability is coming later. Everything's kind of getting pushed.
So there is a chance that you know, we're kind
of early on that midlife crisis way that the following
(22:12):
generation might be experiencing that more like fifty to fifty five.
I don't know, I'm just kind of speculating, but if
everything's getting pushed back, then that would assume that that
does too.
Speaker 3 (22:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
And I think one of the things too, that would
contribute to that is we look younger now than forty
year olds looked.
Speaker 4 (22:31):
Oh it's hilarious when you feel backs ago. What's the
thing about the Golden Girls? Yeah, the Golden Girls were
supposed to be. How old were they supposed to be?
Speaker 2 (22:41):
Like sixty?
Speaker 4 (22:42):
I think less than that. I think they were supposed
to be younger than that. They looked like they were
one hundred and twenty.
Speaker 3 (22:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (22:46):
It was like how Kirsten was telling me about this,
how old were the Golden Girls supposed to be? Number
one Google question? We're meant to be in their late fifties.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
Yeah, and it's like I'm playing pickleball with guys in
my late in their fifties.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
Then they don't look like a Golden girl.
Speaker 1 (23:06):
Yeah, and.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
That so I think that that also contributes.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
When you're like, Okay, well look at so and so,
and you're like yeah, they look pretty good for you're
like Demi Moore and you're like, okay, she's seventy now,
Like I don't know what her age is. But so
I think that that pushes it. And I also think
that changes your mindset a little bit, because even when
I was a kid and I was like, mom, do
(23:32):
you feel old? And she was like twenty nine or
thirty five or forty or.
Speaker 4 (23:36):
So, you're a kid. Thirty is one hundred. Yeah, I
mean it's just so old.
Speaker 1 (23:40):
And they're like, no, I still feel like a kid.
I was like, how can that be? And now I
am at forty five and I am.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
As a witch.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
I feel the same as I did as a teenager,
goofing around and being funny and doing that stuff.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
So I get it.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
But also I don't know if i've Yeah, I feel
like we're not going to look as old as the
Golden Girls when we're in our fifties.
Speaker 4 (24:04):
I think that's true. I want, but that maybe to
that point too, maybe things get pushed a little.
Speaker 3 (24:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (24:09):
I mean there's never been more products right for your face,
your hair. We were talking about this last episode, like
light bo like all the different things to extend your youth. Yeah,
everyone wants to look younger, longer, be younger longer, all
this kind of stuff. So maybe it just ends up
pushing that crisis. And if you don't have a traditional job,
(24:29):
I think that's the one of the major get me
out of here things for people. I don't you know,
I think between maybe family relationships, jobs, and like where
you live, I feel like the job is the thing
where you're like a thirty years of this thing. Yeah,
and then you know now what I think? Then, now,
(24:51):
what is a question that people are having to ask?
I wonder I would love I would love to find
out from someone who would say that they have actually
gone through through like a full crisis. Is it easier
now to kind of go through that because there's like
support groups and there's like things to turn to, or
is it harder now because it's like you look on
(25:12):
social media and it seems like everyone has everything all together, right,
it just seems like you're even more lonely than ever before.
I don't know, Yeah, I assume it's the same.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
I think, you know, like some people want to hide
that to keep it to themselves that they're going to
some stuff.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
Some people like to talk about it. Some people do it,
some people do a podcast about it. Some people get.
Speaker 4 (25:35):
Whatever you can get, some people buy a chain, some
people there's all kinds of crisises.
Speaker 3 (25:41):
So, Bradley, did you ever have a moment that you
realize you might be having a midlife crisis?
Speaker 4 (25:49):
A great question. I don't think there's been. To Tyson's point,
I don't feel like I'm old enough to have a
midlife crisis other than these like like physical deteriorations, which
we talked about a couple of weeks ago, you know
where it's kind of like, oh, like my back is sore.
It takes me, you know, two months to recover from
(26:11):
pulling a hamstring when I raised my kid. You know,
those types of things. Those are the things that kind
of linger. But I think there's not there's not anything
that has stuck out to me like I've got to
change it this second, or it's like I haven't I
haven't gotten to that precipice. But I will say there's
and we've talked about this a bunch of episodes ago,
(26:33):
there's something inside me that's like I want to have
a physical business. What I do is so creative, and
it's in my brain and if something happens to my brain,
it kind of all goes away, right, That's the thing.
So I've also started thinking about could that be a
pivot point in my life, like I do I you know,
coffee shop or I've actually thought a lot about like
(26:55):
self serve car washes basically like I love cars and
it's like a vending machine of cars. Ye could that
be something that would be like, you know, the next
chapter not so much a crisis. And so it's a
slow burn. I've been looking into it. I've been doing
some research, crunching some numbers, but i haven't gotten to
the point where I'm flipping the table, you know, to
(27:16):
to like change everything.
Speaker 2 (27:18):
Earn everything down. I'll figure out the car wash once
the dust settles.
Speaker 4 (27:23):
What was that movie? It was like the Something Man.
It was like he was totally disgruntled and yeah, it
goes on.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
It with Michael Douglas.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
Michael Douglas and he has the basic quits his job,
he goes yes, he goes office and then he just
quits his office job and he or he gets fired
or something, and he goes on a tear, goes on
a tack, gets a baseball bat from somewhere people try
to mug him and he's just like, I have.
Speaker 4 (27:50):
Not the right day, yeah, not the right day. Yeah,
and he just beats the crap out of him office space.
Speaker 3 (27:57):
Is that another midlife crisis?
Speaker 1 (27:58):
Yes, office another midlife crisis? So one percent, And he
just goes and decides he's just going to say it
be one hundred percent honest.
Speaker 3 (28:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
He goes it and tells them that why why didn't
you come to work? I didn't feel like it. They're like, wow, yeah,
so refreshing.
Speaker 4 (28:15):
Yeah, you've been missing some work. I wouldn't say missing.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:22):
So there's kind of like a fine line then between
like a pivot and a crisis, because you can also
blow up stuff or change everything without it being like
dramatic and crazy like kind of way. Yeah, bradlely have
start a new business or working betweening one career for another.
So there's kind of a bit of an overlap too
between yeah, a pivot in your life and in your
(28:43):
career versus a midlife crisis. And I wonder if some
of those symptoms have to do with that, like as
far as depression, not sleeping, Like do those accompany pivots too?
Are those more I think another.
Speaker 4 (29:02):
I think something else to consider is like I'm thinking
about the small stuff, like i want another tattoo. I've
already been emailing with this tattoo guy about it. I'm like,
I'm getting a chain. Kirsten's role in that has been
very like are you sure? And I'm like, yeah, I
think so, and she's like, okay, you do you right?
Speaker 2 (29:21):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (29:22):
And I think when when you if you create a
lot of pushback in those situations, if you have a
spouse or a partner or a best friend who's like, dude,
I'm gonna go get the Corvette, and you push hard
against it. You know, we're giving Corvette a bad name.
But the idea of Mara, I can Camaros even switched
it out honestly between the two. Please just get a
Charger's the charger the official car of Atlanta's freeway accidents.
(29:48):
People are like two hundreds of an hour in those
for no reason at all on a Friday at five.
But I think that's an important element too, because you
can you can really move a crisis up if you
get a lot of pushback or somebody being like that's stupid,
or like, you know, I think if I would feel
almost more emboldened if somebody, you know, it was like,
(30:10):
I don't know, I'm thinking about switching careers. Don't do that,
you know. It's like, well, at least tear me out.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
I'm quitting now.
Speaker 4 (30:18):
Yeah, yeah exactly. Oh really you don't think I'm gonna
do it. I don't think you're doing it. Boom, just
let it? Why not just keep a safe thing? Yeah? Yeah,
so I think that's something to be in there as well.
Oh yeah. My parents were like, you're moving to LA
when I was like, I'm graduating college, Like, you're moving
to La okay.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
You know.
Speaker 4 (30:36):
It was like a year and they're like you coming
home Like no, okay. And then we were like, we
finally got a stable job in Phoenix. I was hosting
a show, getting a check every two weeks, and I
was like, I think we're moving to New York and
they're like why you know, But I was like, because
we only live once, so we've always wanted to live
in the city and we love it, and they're like,
but you have it. They didn't say it this way,
but they were saying, you have a stable job, you
(30:57):
have to raise a family, think about your family, and
you know, I I am. In fact, I saw this great.
I think I sent it to you guys on the
Midlife Crisis Instagram page.
Speaker 2 (31:09):
Oh yeah, I got a piece so bad.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
Okay, keep your thought thought, Phil, definitely keep this in.
Speaker 4 (31:17):
Tyson has to pee. People were wondering. That was one
of the questions we got in a d M. Does
Tyson p And I didn't know how to answer that
because I've never I've never known him to go before.
Speaker 3 (31:28):
Well, he's getting older, so so true.
Speaker 4 (31:32):
He's a step away from just a bag under the desk.
I like that shirt, by the way, or a sweater.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
Yeah you.
Speaker 4 (31:42):
Nice? Yeah, it looks it's a good, good cut.
Speaker 3 (31:43):
For the company. I was talking about that Morano.
Speaker 4 (31:46):
It's how you Oh yeah, Morano. I have to look
him up.
Speaker 3 (31:49):
They're really good.
Speaker 4 (31:51):
Is that online?
Speaker 3 (31:54):
I got.
Speaker 4 (31:56):
Sears or not Belk or something.
Speaker 2 (31:59):
Yeah, I got it Sears robot.
Speaker 4 (32:03):
I got it there with my Craftsman tools. Okay, all right?
Oh yeah. So I saw this post and someone said
like it was one of these montage posts with text
on screen, but it was like you say you would
die for your kids, but will you live for them?
And it was like will you take care of yourself,
(32:24):
Will you take your wife on dates? Will you show
them how.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
To be just?
Speaker 1 (32:30):
It is?
Speaker 5 (32:31):
That's the idea.
Speaker 4 (32:33):
So I think sometimes with that that idea is like,
you know, my parents were like, you know, you got
to think about your families, like I am. We're doing
this amazing experience together, and sure we don't have it
all figured out, but like that's a part of how
we live our lives, you know. So anyway, all that
to say, it is easy to hear those voices on
the outside, and I think we as trusted people of
friends who may be going through it or through something similar,
(32:55):
I think it's better to listen than to give advice
right away, because I think that can actually stoke the
crisis even harder.
Speaker 3 (33:06):
There's definitely, especially some personality types, if you tell them
to do something, they're always getting be the opposite.
Speaker 2 (33:11):
Yeah, so can't you just manipulate them? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (33:15):
Tyson the ultimate survivor. Guys, you can take Tyson off
the island, but you can't take the island off of
Tyson boom. Can't you just manipulate them? This is why
your daughters love you more. That's what we talked about
last week, and I'm sure it hasn't changed, except you
were going to implement something where you just told them
to like leave you alone or something to Rachel.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
Yeah, yeah, that didn't work.
Speaker 5 (33:41):
I mean I didn't really do that, I'm sure, yeah,
but yeah, I listening is good and being there and uh,
I do like that what you said, though, Bradley, because
it does like I used to live like that all
the time, what like what just whatever I wanted to.
Speaker 1 (34:03):
Do, you only once, let's go see it, let's go
do it. And now that I'm a dad, and I mean,
I can't just reset everything every time and just live
out of the trunk of my car like I could.
But even things that I did before, I'm like, we
can't do that. It's too dangerous. There's too big of
a risk that you know, we're gonna be in a
(34:23):
bad part of the world and something could happen. Whereas
before I was just like I'm just gonna skip through
this and it's dangerous maybe who knows. And now I'm like, no, no, no, no, no,
we can't go there. That's dangerous. And they're like, didn't
you used to be there all the time. Yeah, you
used to, but so I don't know, it's it's. Yeah,
(34:45):
I also.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
Think it's getting older and things becoming more monotonous. Like
there's definitely that aspect of it, as far as taking
danger and consideration. But it's also there's a lot of
things that I used to be so stoked about, but
now I'm less stoked about because I've already done them,
Like you know what I mean. Yeah, with travel, for instance,
(35:07):
I still love traveling, but I've also traveled a lot,
so it's just a lot less exciting than it used
to be.
Speaker 1 (35:13):
Yeah, and you hate airports. Every time you go to
an airport, you just hate it a little bit more.
That's where I like to be where when I get somewhere,
but it's almost not worth going to the airport for it.
Speaker 3 (35:23):
I used to love airports too, like I used to
love everything about travel. Now yeah, less and less things.
Speaker 4 (35:30):
Yeah, that's a good point too. Yes, that age.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
It is true.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
Like you watch your kids and they're so pumped about
every single thing, and you get to this thing where
it's like I don't feel the heighs or lows, you.
Speaker 3 (35:44):
Know, like.
Speaker 4 (35:46):
I'm emotionally dead.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
I don't feel I want a million dollars. Thank you,
you lost you lost fifty K. Thank you darn it.
Jarnt Yeah, exactly, you broke your leg. As long as
I don't feel much pain, who cares? And like that's yeah.
(36:08):
And my kids are like airplane. It's like, yeah, we
lived by an airport.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Everybody stopped. There's another one.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
There's at the same time.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
Everyone count them.
Speaker 4 (36:21):
Look look at just six.
Speaker 1 (36:24):
Yeah, that's when we're passing cows. Tell me when we're
passing cows. I'm like, I really envy this and just
like wish I could be that.
Speaker 4 (36:37):
Still but driving. Look, there's a real dinosaur. Anyway, for
lunch today.
Speaker 1 (36:42):
Guys, we're gonna go Alien and big Foot holding hands
making out.
Speaker 4 (36:47):
But it's fine. I gotta get my coffee. We're going forward.
We got places to go. Let's do this. That's really funny.
Speaker 2 (36:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (36:56):
So here's a question. Could a midlife crisis actually be good?
Are there instances where people need to break out of
that and they need to blow something up. It's got
a negative connotation, but maybe it's not all bad.
Speaker 1 (37:10):
No, I think it can be positive. A lot of times.
I've never viewed it as necessarily negative. Even talking and
starting this podcast and stuff, I was like, we have
midlife crisis is that's what either puts you in situations
or motivates you to change or anything like that.
Speaker 3 (37:26):
So yeah, that could even be its own episode too.
That'd be fun to talk about when is a midlife crisis? Good?
Speaker 4 (37:34):
Yeah, we'll save it sets a tease teas for you guys.
The next one thing ELT's coming.
Speaker 2 (37:41):
Yeah, I think any takeaways from this episode.
Speaker 4 (37:46):
I think as we were processing through, I think, uh,
the idea of how important support is leading into a
crisis as someone's going through something small to give space,
you know, even if it impacts you a little bit,
you know, you can air your concerns, but doing it
in a way that's respectful of that person. And sometimes
(38:06):
that's just listening to you know, your buddy at coffee
being like man, I don't know, man, Like I'm not
feeling it with my wife anymore, and thinking it's you know,
just to listen instead of jump to a conclusion or
to advice or whatever. I think, because that crisis could
domino into other crisises as well, and you want to
just kind of take it, take it as it goes.
(38:29):
That's why I'm taking away.
Speaker 3 (38:30):
Yeah, the original question was like, how do you know
you're in the middle of a midlife crisis. And I
think that it's all about paying attention to yourself and
like things that have changed dramatically in the way that
you feel, the things that you do, and especially how
you feel about important things in your life like work
(38:51):
and family and kind of being in tune with those
things and then realizing when there's a big dramatic change
in them. And that's how you might know that you're
in the middle of a mid life crisis. And yeah,
talking to your friends and family and like Bradly saying too,
not necessarily listening if you're going through it, but sharing,
(39:12):
trying to reach out to people and sharing these changes
that you're experiencing and seeing what they think about it.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
Yeah. Yeah, I.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
Think like the drastic ones or something like that, I recognize,
but it's the smaller things that I don't fully recognize
until either in the future or if I really am
like take a step back and look at it. So
I think, yeah, I think you can listen to your
friends and family. They probably will tell you a little
(39:43):
bit if you're going through something like I've had moments
where Rachel's like, you seem like you're in a funk.
And so those moments are like, oh, yeah, I am.
Can I sit on the couch for just two more
days straight and then I'll be good? Or you know, yeah,
I don't know. I think, yeah, listen when someone's going
through it, but also listen to people around you when
(40:05):
maybe you don't recognize that you're going through it.
Speaker 3 (40:08):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 4 (40:09):
That's good. So bringing the heat, that's it.
Speaker 2 (40:13):
Thanks tuning in.
Speaker 1 (40:14):
Yeah, we'll have more next week. And uh, I think
we should get into crisises that are positive or can
be or maybe we view maybe if you are an optimist,
you can view most of these crisises as net positives.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
So and I.
Speaker 3 (40:33):
Would love to hear your guys' wake up calls when
you knew you were going through a midlife crisis or
kind of what the symptoms were for you when you
started to realize something was going on for audience love, yeah,
love love for you guys to message us, send us
a comment, whatever, And if there's some cool ones that
come in, we'd like to share them on the air too.
So let us know what your wake up moment was
(40:56):
when you realize you were going through a crisis. And
we can't wait to hear.
Speaker 4 (41:00):
Them, Yeah, make sure you like them subscribe too, because
that way you can get us back again each week
in your ears.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
If it looks like one of us is going through
a crisis and we don't know it, also feel free
to chime in and let us know.
Speaker 2 (41:14):
Talk to you next week.
Welcome back to Midlife Crisises. I'm Tyson, one of the hosts.
Thank you so much for liking, subscribing, commenting, sharing all
of that stuff helps us continue to do this podcast,
and we would appreciate if you would continue to do
that each and every episode.
Speaker 2 (00:15):
We love you guys so much.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
We want to keep doing this and that is one
of the ways to guarantee, I mean nothing at.
Speaker 2 (00:22):
That guarantee then we will keep doing this.
Speaker 1 (00:26):
So smash that subscribe button, that like button, that follow button,
whatever buttons are there, smash them all.
Speaker 3 (00:34):
And we really want to hear for you guys too.
We want to hear about your midlife crisises. We want
to know what kind of stuff you are going through
so that we can talk about it and share our
insights about trying to survive. This quote as well. So
let's get into it. How do you know that you're
going through a midlife crisis? Was there like a certain moment,
(00:55):
a certain epiphany where you realize that you're in the
middle of a midlife crisis.
Speaker 1 (00:59):
I can't just hit reset because I can't stop paying
my mortgage when I am going through that. I'm not
like this is a crisis but then when I step back,
I'm like, oh, okay, I'm in a slum.
Speaker 4 (01:10):
I feel like the crisis is like people point to
it as like a moment, but I think it's almost
like a storm. I think you should be questioning a
little bit about your life, but that doesn't have to
be at forty or forty five or fifty.
Speaker 1 (01:20):
Welcome back to the Midlife Crisises podcast. We talk all
things midlife crisis, what we're going through, how we're executing,
and whether or not it's working for us. I'm one
of the co hosts, Tyson Apostle here with my other
two co hosts Bradley.
Speaker 2 (01:36):
What's up?
Speaker 4 (01:37):
True? That's true, man, I got to tell you I've
got some slight crisis is going on right now. I
just got I got a gold chain. I don't know
do I wear it in, do I wear it out?
I'm sure we'll get to that later. There's more pressing matters.
I live in Atlanta, Georgia, father of a couple of kids,
just trying to figure things out myself, content creator, run
my own business that has its hies and lows and
(01:59):
all that kind of stuff as well. But I love
being on here. Make sure you guys are liking and
subscribing to the show. We've already started getting some It's
not fan mail because it's not male, but we get
some comments and some dms on our Instagram at Midlife Crisises.
Make sure you go and follow us there as well.
But I'm excited because William sent us a video the
other day and he seemed like he was he was
(02:19):
feeling pretty good. He was feeling himself with his new
haircut and his shoes. So I'm excited for what that's
generated inside of him. For a question today, So William,
what's up? Man?
Speaker 3 (02:29):
A haircut is important and I am loving it, So
you're great. Got a pair of Jordan's too, And I
got a pair of Jordans for my daughter, So like, yeah,
we're starting it off pretty good.
Speaker 4 (02:39):
Are they matching?
Speaker 3 (02:41):
No, HER's a pink close enough?
Speaker 4 (02:44):
Okay?
Speaker 2 (02:45):
And nice Bradley's midlife crisis shoe.
Speaker 3 (02:48):
Absolutely, I've got three now and I'm good. Get a
lot more.
Speaker 4 (02:53):
Yes, Yes, buying happiness.
Speaker 3 (02:56):
Bradley is not joking about the chain being a midlife
crisis for him. There's been many emails chains about him,
all kinds of difficulties. The thickness the length. Yeah inside
outside so real for you, Bradley.
Speaker 1 (03:13):
Yeah, my professional opinion, and I don't it's not an insult.
Speaker 2 (03:18):
Okay. It's short enough.
Speaker 1 (03:20):
Yeah, and it's thin enough that you can wear it
on the outside like that.
Speaker 4 (03:26):
Okay that I can, you can, You've got yeah, right.
Speaker 3 (03:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (03:30):
It felt versatile with kind of this, like the black
shirt and the denim or whatever. I was like, all right,
it does feel a little nineties boy band, but I'm
okay with that.
Speaker 2 (03:40):
Yeah, that's what we're all getting back into.
Speaker 3 (03:42):
Yeah, the chain gang approves.
Speaker 2 (03:45):
The chain gang approves.
Speaker 3 (03:47):
So my question today is I was thinking of what
we wanted to talk about today, and I was thinking of,
you know, the big mid life crisis that I've been
going through in the last year. I recently got divorced
last May, and I'm a single daughter to a four
year old. So it's been a.
Speaker 4 (04:04):
Lot of single dad to a daughter. You're not a single.
Speaker 3 (04:08):
Daughter, yeah, every one. And I'm a single dad to
a four year old, so a lot of adjusting and
that's why kind of we started this podcast in some ways,
so it's been reallythartic for me. But my question today is,
how do you know that you're going through a midlife crisis,
and was there like a certain moment, a certain epiphany
(04:31):
where you realize that you're in the middle of a
midlife crisis, And like for other people who are out there,
what kind of thoughts behaviors might be somewhat of a
symptom or a give you a hint that, yeah, you're
probably going through some sort of a mid life crisis there,
because I've been through too now when I was thinking
(04:51):
about this what I'm going through now, and then there's
one that happened a while ago. I don't know, but
maybe quarter life crisis or whatever, and they came from
really different places, and I realized that they were happening
at different times and really different scenarios. So I thought
it would be cool to talk about that with my
experience and then also kind of listen to what you
(05:14):
guys how you kind of know, and hopefully get some
audience feedback too about kind of what their wake up
moment was where they realized, Hey, I'm going through something here.
Speaker 4 (05:26):
I'm going to actually see what chat GPT says are the.
Speaker 2 (05:32):
Signs of a crisis.
Speaker 4 (05:33):
So yeah, so Tyson, while I'm doing that, you can
talk if you will.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (05:38):
I mean for me, I've never had like a moment
where I was like everything's broken, Like that's never or like,
but the moments that I have are everything is overwhelming
right now and I can't just hit reset because I
can't stop paying my mortgage for six months because I
(05:58):
just don't want to. I can't do any of that stuff.
So then it's like a weird hole that you're in
of like I gotta run everybody around town. Then I've
got to do then I gotta pay all the bills.
Oh and more bills just keep coming in, and I
don't want to exercise anymore because I'm not motivated to
(06:19):
do that. I just want to sit on the couch
and not pay any of the bills. And for me,
I've never like when I am going through that, I'm
not like this is a crisis. But then when I
step back and look at it from try to be
like a third party view of what I'm doing, I'm like, oh, Okay,
I'm in a slump. So for me personally, my midlife
(06:43):
things are more of just slumpy moments in my life
where I'm just overwhelmed by having to or feeling like
I'm having to do too much. But I've never had
a catastrophic I hadn't yet. I haven't had a cat
traffic midlife incident where the wheels just came off and
(07:07):
I had a corvette that has.
Speaker 4 (07:10):
I also think the crisis is, you know, so stereotypical.
And I'll tell you what chat Gipt has to say
in a second. But I feel like the crisis is
like people point to it as like a moment, but
I think it's almost like a storm, and like the
storm like ebbs and flows a little bit, right, Like
we're just in a moment where you know, I'll look
outside and be like sprinkling, and then twenty minutes later,
(07:31):
like the wind is howling and the rain is pouring,
and then it slows up a little bit, and it's
just it's kind of like, at least for me, there's
like an ebb and flow of it. And that's why
I think you can have a quarter life crisis without
like a major thing happening. You don't have to have
have had like someone close to you die to create
this moment or to have you get in a wreck
(07:52):
and now you're paralyzed. Quarter life crisis I think it
comes out of a lot of internal that would be identity.
That would be a huge crisis.
Speaker 2 (08:00):
This is nature crisis.
Speaker 4 (08:01):
Yeaheah, just keeping it positive, all right.
Speaker 3 (08:03):
So here's what That's a good analogy though. I like
that storm analogy. That's good.
Speaker 1 (08:07):
Yeah, And I was even gonna I add onto that
natural disasters. It could be an earthquake that's catastrophic, could
also be a typhoon, could be of.
Speaker 2 (08:17):
Fires throughout fire, wildfire wars.
Speaker 4 (08:21):
Like we're just brainstorming natural causes and disasters.
Speaker 2 (08:24):
It's great.
Speaker 4 (08:25):
Yeah, Okay, Chad Gpt the theologian philosopher, here's the top ten. Okay,
so here's what I here's the prompt, give me a
short list of ten signs that a man is going
through a midlife crisis with scientific backing. It's saying a
midlife crisis can manifest in different ways, driven by psychological
and biological changes. Here are the ten signs backed by
(08:47):
research and psychology and behavioral science. Number one sudden obsession
with appearance. All of a sudden, you care about what
you look like. Increase changes in grooming fashion. Number two
a drastic career change. You quit a lot held job,
you're seeking a totally different career path because you're not satisfied. Yeah,
and there is the previous with American Psychological Association's hard
(09:08):
Harvard Business Review. I'm not going to give you all
of them, but there's backing here. Folk impulsive spending, making
an irrational financial decision, buying expensive cars or luxury items.
Increased risk taking, engaging in reckless behaviors like gambling, excessive drinking,
or talking a lot with tyson. Number five dissatisfaction in relationships,
(09:31):
questioning long term relationships are suddenly seeking new romantic partners.
Depression or anxiety. I think you were talking about that
a little bit. Mood swings, feelings of emptiness, or existential dread.
It's a great name for a podcast, too. Yeah, let's
see number seven. Nostalgia and regret frequently reminiscing about your
youth or regretting your past life choices. You coming up, buddy,
(09:53):
Come on. Number eight. Feeling trapped and craving independent of
This is desire for freedom. I got to get out
of here, and I'm feeling trapped and craving independence. Number
nine unusual fatigue or health concerns. You're becoming hyper aware
of aging and physical deterioration. And number ten new hobbies
(10:14):
or radical changes and interests, developing unexpected passions.
Speaker 2 (10:20):
Researching World War Two?
Speaker 1 (10:21):
Isn't that the popular one where like, all of a sudden,
I'm buying World War two history books.
Speaker 4 (10:30):
My dad with World War two histories, submarines. He's reading
about like the like the Japanese generals writing autobiographies. This
is a first hand account of a pilot who was stranded.
I'm like, Okay, what happened? Like, yeah, he's always like.
Speaker 3 (10:48):
Or is that just getting old?
Speaker 4 (10:50):
So that's what I was gonna say, because a lot
of these things I don't think are necessarily bad. I
think you should be questioning a little bit about your life.
But that doesn't have to be at forty or forty
five or fifty. Yeah, but maybe if you've got a
good friend and all of a sudden, you know, you
start seeing some of those extreme moments happen. Maybe maybe
the extremity. Extremity, yeah, the extremness. I don't know what the.
Speaker 1 (11:12):
Words I think when you're listening to this list, when
I'm listening to it, the word that comes up is dissatisfaction.
How you look with your health, yeah, your finances, with
your job, with your relationship with your family, with your friends. Yeah,
that's what it comes down to.
Speaker 4 (11:31):
Like, so we've got an ax to grind face on
those and.
Speaker 2 (11:35):
It's a recognition of that. So it's realizing.
Speaker 1 (11:38):
So that's the moment where you're just like, I don't
like that or that or that or that. Is there
something better on all of those? Let me find out?
Speaker 4 (11:48):
Yeah, And maybe the midlifeness of it is the well,
am I going to just keep doing this for the
rest of my life? You know, like the idea that
like maybe I don't have that much longer. Do I
want to stay in this dissatisfied position or do I
make a change?
Speaker 2 (12:04):
Right? Yeah?
Speaker 3 (12:05):
And for me, I think we've kind of talked about
this in previous episode, but it's like the external versus
the internal sources of what's going on in your life,
because I think that a lot of the things on
that list and where you're talking about are like more internal, like, hey,
I'm dissatisfied with this relationship. I feel weird, Whereas the
(12:29):
one that I went through I'm going through now was
because things were done to me. So this could be
it could have been like an illness, it could have
been a death in the family. It could be a
divorce and like that of it, Yeah yeah, where you're
kind of thrown into the crisis verse the opposite where
it might be monotony. It might be just like feeling
(12:49):
like you're in Groundhog's Day and things are going the
same forever and you don't want it to be like
that and you want some sort of change. But I
think there's kind of like a dichotomy the two different
ways that you might end up experience a crisis. And
then I think that with the external ones, like things
that are done to you, it might be pretty obvious
to you that things are messed up, like because everything
(13:11):
in your life is getting thrown into chaos, whereas on
the other side, it might really sneak up on you.
And that's kind of what I'm asking too, is like
what is that moment where you realize when because things
can be creeping up on you for a long time
and then what is it that makes you suddenly realize,
oh shit, like this is I need to change, Like
(13:32):
this is like something's going on here, It's time for
me to do something else.
Speaker 1 (13:37):
I think on a lot of those there's just like
it's a slow build to them action mm hm, like, oh,
I hate my job.
Speaker 2 (13:45):
I hate my job. I hate my job.
Speaker 1 (13:47):
It pays fine, I can't leave, it pays fine, I
can't leave. And then your boss asks you for something
too absurd on one day and you're like.
Speaker 2 (13:55):
I'm out of here. Yeah, what are you gonna do?
Speaker 1 (13:58):
I don't know, not being here anything else here, and
then that triggers something where you go home you're like,
oh shit, dude, burn it all down.
Speaker 2 (14:06):
Now I don't have a paying job, and now I like.
Speaker 1 (14:10):
One of my and the yeah, and it's not like
you're not acting irrationally in those moments. You just need
that poke or broad to take action on that thing.
And then I think that from my perspective, that's what
I think is happening.
Speaker 3 (14:30):
But yeah, for me, when I was going through the
kind of the internal woe, when the dissatisfied I want
to blow things up, not happy with it. Well, the
biggest symptom was, or the biggest hint or whatever you
want to call it, was sleep like I wasn't able
to sleep. I never had any trouble sleeping before, and
then suddenly I'm just lying in bed like thinking about things.
(14:54):
And that got worse and worse, and then it was
like the time to like that match and blow it.
That's kind of how I The main symptom that I
recognized was the sleep part.
Speaker 1 (15:06):
Okay, and then did you have like a moment where
you just like got up after not sleeping or just.
Speaker 2 (15:12):
Like screw it, blowing it all up right now?
Speaker 3 (15:15):
Yeah, pretty much. I mean kind of a slow build,
but then yeah, yeah, you.
Speaker 4 (15:20):
Get do you guys have people in your lives who
have done that those big impulsive things, whether it is
a purchase or the quitting the job or the leaving
the family or anything like that around you. I haven't
really seen that yet, at least in my kind of
medium to close circles.
Speaker 1 (15:39):
Yeah, I haven't seen that yet. I just see the
Corvette Club drive past once in a while and that.
Speaker 4 (15:45):
There the way to the Tommy Bahama meet up.
Speaker 1 (15:47):
Yeah, but they're the old old guys who are just
like doing it socially, Yeah, I I mean part of
it too is I think you're social circle. You know
how they're like hang out with people that you are
on trajectory with the birds of a feather. And it's
(16:08):
a natural thing too. It's like I wouldn't hang out
with somebody who's just like constantly going through it. And
it's not because I wouldn't want to be supportive if
something happened. I'm I mean, but you're going through it,
but you're in control of it.
Speaker 2 (16:22):
Worship.
Speaker 4 (16:22):
We're kind of sharing them movies and I are splitting
the emotional carrying will.
Speaker 1 (16:29):
But it's just wouldn't I wouldn't vibe with somebody who
was always in a panic about their life and it
blowing up and then purposely blowing up their spot every
chance they got. I just don't think that we would
ever come together tight enough that that would be my
friend group. And like my friend group will have like
a moment where you know, somebody like loses a ton
of weight because they realized they were getting out. Then
(16:51):
that type of stuff is also midlife crisis, and that
stuff's like, yeah, that's all happening. But I don't have
any buddy close to me who is just like quit
their job, bought a brand new car, did a thing,
destroyed every relationship they've ever known because they just wanted
(17:11):
like the hardest refreshed possible alienates. Everybody moves to foreign country.
Thailand would be probably where they go.
Speaker 2 (17:21):
All of it.
Speaker 4 (17:22):
Yeah, I haven't.
Speaker 2 (17:24):
Yes, I haven't, So I haven't.
Speaker 1 (17:26):
I don't know, I'm probably I don't know, I've I've
seen people like that that I'm associated with or I
wouldn't say close close friends with, where I'm like, oh, okay,
that's they're going through a thing.
Speaker 4 (17:37):
I also wonder if it Oh sorry, well go ahead.
Speaker 3 (17:40):
But I was just gonna say I think that some
of that is contagious too. So you're talking about within
friend group, losing weight. It could be, you know, buying
a new car whatever, But a lot of that is contagious.
And there's studies out there about like divorce, like the
more people you know who are divorced, the more chances
of you getting higher. Higher your chances of getting divorced are.
(18:02):
And same with you know your parents are divorced, you
have a lot of higher chances of getting divorced. But
I think there's some sort of social component too. And
it's like if you're in a friend group and then
you see your friends start blowing shit up and then
they're happier, Like, I don't know, I think that that
might be contagious too.
Speaker 4 (18:20):
Yeah, I was going to say, I think some of
it might be at least for us, as we've lived
more unique lives than just like a standard stereotypical I
worked in one job for fifteen years. I lived in
the same house. I you know, Like, I think some
of that drudgery would definitely drive me to be like,
this is it, That's all that life has to offer.
(18:41):
But I've been fortunate enough. It hasn't been easy from
any financial standpoint, but to move around a lot, meet
a lot of people, travel, you know. So I feel
like the spice of life has been kind of along
the way instead of that concept of like I'm going
to work in one job until i can retire and
then I'll have fun, you know. Then I'll start living
and people start realizing that's not guaranteed anymore either.
Speaker 3 (19:05):
And then they're just so sick of waiting for it,
and that brownhog Bay syndrome where things are just the
same for so long and then they they need to
make something happen. Then maybe it is something small, but
it could also be something really big that changes everything, Yeah,
ditching other relationships and everything.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
I also think our generation we're different than our parents.
Our parents were more like that, We'll get a corporate
job trust in the corporation.
Speaker 2 (19:35):
They always take care of you. Yeah, and then into
thirty to forty years of that wild.
Speaker 1 (19:42):
You can take a break and travel and see the
world when you're ninety. And now our generation is more hustlers,
more entrepreneurs, more people that are just like doing their
own thing on their own, getting contract jobs, stuff like
that at and so it's less. I think there's there's
(20:04):
I think I feel like when my when I was
a kid, all of my parents' friends were all like
corporate people or in some pretty standard job setting. Right now,
you can't even begin to guess what somebody does to
earn a living.
Speaker 4 (20:22):
And so I think our generation when you try to
explain it to your dad, you said, what idea?
Speaker 2 (20:27):
Yeah, or even like a grandparent, what do you do
forget that?
Speaker 1 (20:30):
Yeah?
Speaker 2 (20:32):
Have you heard of podcasting and influencing?
Speaker 3 (20:37):
And uh, I'm still figuring out the podcast. But I
think that he's he's figured out how to listen to
him now, good, that's our podcast has done anything. It's
not my dad how to listen to podcasts, Yes, because
he came out of it was really hard for him.
Speaker 4 (20:54):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (20:55):
We So I think our generation is different and the
kids younger than us. It's going to be even different
for them, and there's just going to be different ways
to probably execute on a midlife crisis, in different midlife
crisises in general things to crisis about. So we might
be into no man's land here with the way that
(21:18):
we function now as a society, as forty plus year
old guys who were like the front end of the
generations of just doing whatever to make a living.
Speaker 4 (21:29):
Yeah. I just looked up real quick because I was curious, like,
have the percentage of midlife crisis has changed over time?
That was through Google, and it was just saying that
the research suggests that experiencing of a significant crisis in
midlife is not as common as portrayed, and there's with
only ten to twenty percent of people reporting it, and
(21:50):
there is evidence of the perception of midlife and the
timing of life milestones are shifting. I think that's a
good point too, because what we might start seeing is
midlife crisis is happening at like because if you're not,
you know, people are getting married later, jobs are later,
financial stability is coming later. Everything's kind of getting pushed.
So there is a chance that you know, we're kind
of early on that midlife crisis way that the following
(22:12):
generation might be experiencing that more like fifty to fifty five.
I don't know, I'm just kind of speculating, but if
everything's getting pushed back, then that would assume that that
does too.
Speaker 3 (22:22):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (22:22):
And I think one of the things too, that would
contribute to that is we look younger now than forty
year olds looked.
Speaker 4 (22:31):
Oh it's hilarious when you feel backs ago. What's the
thing about the Golden Girls? Yeah, the Golden Girls were
supposed to be. How old were they supposed to be?
Speaker 2 (22:41):
Like sixty?
Speaker 4 (22:42):
I think less than that. I think they were supposed
to be younger than that. They looked like they were
one hundred and twenty.
Speaker 3 (22:46):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (22:46):
It was like how Kirsten was telling me about this,
how old were the Golden Girls supposed to be? Number
one Google question? We're meant to be in their late fifties.
Speaker 1 (22:59):
Yeah, and it's like I'm playing pickleball with guys in
my late in their fifties.
Speaker 2 (23:04):
Then they don't look like a Golden girl.
Speaker 1 (23:06):
Yeah, and.
Speaker 2 (23:08):
That so I think that that also contributes.
Speaker 1 (23:10):
When you're like, Okay, well look at so and so,
and you're like yeah, they look pretty good for you're
like Demi Moore and you're like, okay, she's seventy now,
Like I don't know what her age is. But so
I think that that pushes it. And I also think
that changes your mindset a little bit, because even when
I was a kid and I was like, mom, do
(23:32):
you feel old? And she was like twenty nine or
thirty five or forty or.
Speaker 4 (23:36):
So, you're a kid. Thirty is one hundred. Yeah, I
mean it's just so old.
Speaker 1 (23:40):
And they're like, no, I still feel like a kid.
I was like, how can that be? And now I
am at forty five and I am.
Speaker 2 (23:45):
As a witch.
Speaker 1 (23:46):
I feel the same as I did as a teenager,
goofing around and being funny and doing that stuff.
Speaker 2 (23:51):
So I get it.
Speaker 1 (23:53):
But also I don't know if i've Yeah, I feel
like we're not going to look as old as the
Golden Girls when we're in our fifties.
Speaker 4 (24:04):
I think that's true. I want, but that maybe to
that point too, maybe things get pushed a little.
Speaker 3 (24:08):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (24:09):
I mean there's never been more products right for your face,
your hair. We were talking about this last episode, like
light bo like all the different things to extend your youth. Yeah,
everyone wants to look younger, longer, be younger longer, all
this kind of stuff. So maybe it just ends up
pushing that crisis. And if you don't have a traditional job,
(24:29):
I think that's the one of the major get me
out of here things for people. I don't you know,
I think between maybe family relationships, jobs, and like where
you live, I feel like the job is the thing
where you're like a thirty years of this thing. Yeah,
and then you know now what I think? Then, now,
(24:51):
what is a question that people are having to ask?
I wonder I would love I would love to find
out from someone who would say that they have actually
gone through through like a full crisis. Is it easier
now to kind of go through that because there's like
support groups and there's like things to turn to, or
is it harder now because it's like you look on
(25:12):
social media and it seems like everyone has everything all together, right,
it just seems like you're even more lonely than ever before.
I don't know, Yeah, I assume it's the same.
Speaker 1 (25:24):
I think, you know, like some people want to hide
that to keep it to themselves that they're going to
some stuff.
Speaker 2 (25:29):
Some people like to talk about it. Some people do it,
some people do a podcast about it. Some people get.
Speaker 4 (25:35):
Whatever you can get, some people buy a chain, some
people there's all kinds of crisises.
Speaker 3 (25:41):
So, Bradley, did you ever have a moment that you
realize you might be having a midlife crisis?
Speaker 4 (25:49):
A great question. I don't think there's been. To Tyson's point,
I don't feel like I'm old enough to have a
midlife crisis other than these like like physical deteriorations, which
we talked about a couple of weeks ago, you know
where it's kind of like, oh, like my back is sore.
It takes me, you know, two months to recover from
(26:11):
pulling a hamstring when I raised my kid. You know,
those types of things. Those are the things that kind
of linger. But I think there's not there's not anything
that has stuck out to me like I've got to
change it this second, or it's like I haven't I
haven't gotten to that precipice. But I will say there's
and we've talked about this a bunch of episodes ago,
(26:33):
there's something inside me that's like I want to have
a physical business. What I do is so creative, and
it's in my brain and if something happens to my brain,
it kind of all goes away, right, That's the thing.
So I've also started thinking about could that be a
pivot point in my life, like I do I you know,
coffee shop or I've actually thought a lot about like
(26:55):
self serve car washes basically like I love cars and
it's like a vending machine of cars. Ye could that
be something that would be like, you know, the next
chapter not so much a crisis. And so it's a
slow burn. I've been looking into it. I've been doing
some research, crunching some numbers, but i haven't gotten to
the point where I'm flipping the table, you know, to
(27:16):
to like change everything.
Speaker 2 (27:18):
Earn everything down. I'll figure out the car wash once
the dust settles.
Speaker 4 (27:23):
What was that movie? It was like the Something Man.
It was like he was totally disgruntled and yeah, it
goes on.
Speaker 2 (27:31):
It with Michael Douglas.
Speaker 1 (27:33):
Michael Douglas and he has the basic quits his job,
he goes yes, he goes office and then he just
quits his office job and he or he gets fired
or something, and he goes on a tear, goes on
a tack, gets a baseball bat from somewhere people try
to mug him and he's just like, I have.
Speaker 4 (27:50):
Not the right day, yeah, not the right day. Yeah,
and he just beats the crap out of him office space.
Speaker 3 (27:57):
Is that another midlife crisis?
Speaker 1 (27:58):
Yes, office another midlife crisis? So one percent, And he
just goes and decides he's just going to say it
be one hundred percent honest.
Speaker 3 (28:06):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (28:06):
He goes it and tells them that why why didn't
you come to work? I didn't feel like it. They're like, wow, yeah,
so refreshing.
Speaker 4 (28:15):
Yeah, you've been missing some work. I wouldn't say missing.
Speaker 2 (28:19):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (28:22):
So there's kind of like a fine line then between
like a pivot and a crisis, because you can also
blow up stuff or change everything without it being like
dramatic and crazy like kind of way. Yeah, bradlely have
start a new business or working betweening one career for another.
So there's kind of a bit of an overlap too
between yeah, a pivot in your life and in your
(28:43):
career versus a midlife crisis. And I wonder if some
of those symptoms have to do with that, like as
far as depression, not sleeping, Like do those accompany pivots too?
Are those more I think another.
Speaker 4 (29:02):
I think something else to consider is like I'm thinking
about the small stuff, like i want another tattoo. I've
already been emailing with this tattoo guy about it. I'm like,
I'm getting a chain. Kirsten's role in that has been
very like are you sure? And I'm like, yeah, I
think so, and she's like, okay, you do you right?
Speaker 2 (29:21):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (29:22):
And I think when when you if you create a
lot of pushback in those situations, if you have a
spouse or a partner or a best friend who's like, dude,
I'm gonna go get the Corvette, and you push hard
against it. You know, we're giving Corvette a bad name.
But the idea of Mara, I can Camaros even switched
it out honestly between the two. Please just get a
Charger's the charger the official car of Atlanta's freeway accidents.
(29:48):
People are like two hundreds of an hour in those
for no reason at all on a Friday at five.
But I think that's an important element too, because you
can you can really move a crisis up if you
get a lot of pushback or somebody being like that's stupid,
or like, you know, I think if I would feel
almost more emboldened if somebody, you know, it was like,
(30:10):
I don't know, I'm thinking about switching careers. Don't do that,
you know. It's like, well, at least tear me out.
Speaker 2 (30:17):
I'm quitting now.
Speaker 4 (30:18):
Yeah, yeah exactly. Oh really you don't think I'm gonna
do it. I don't think you're doing it. Boom, just
let it? Why not just keep a safe thing? Yeah? Yeah,
so I think that's something to be in there as well.
Oh yeah. My parents were like, you're moving to LA
when I was like, I'm graduating college, Like, you're moving
to La okay.
Speaker 2 (30:36):
You know.
Speaker 4 (30:36):
It was like a year and they're like you coming
home Like no, okay. And then we were like, we
finally got a stable job in Phoenix. I was hosting
a show, getting a check every two weeks, and I
was like, I think we're moving to New York and
they're like why you know, But I was like, because
we only live once, so we've always wanted to live
in the city and we love it, and they're like,
but you have it. They didn't say it this way,
but they were saying, you have a stable job, you
(30:57):
have to raise a family, think about your family, and
you know, I I am. In fact, I saw this great.
I think I sent it to you guys on the
Midlife Crisis Instagram page.
Speaker 2 (31:09):
Oh yeah, I got a piece so bad.
Speaker 1 (31:10):
Okay, keep your thought thought, Phil, definitely keep this in.
Speaker 4 (31:17):
Tyson has to pee. People were wondering. That was one
of the questions we got in a d M. Does
Tyson p And I didn't know how to answer that
because I've never I've never known him to go before.
Speaker 3 (31:28):
Well, he's getting older, so so true.
Speaker 4 (31:32):
He's a step away from just a bag under the desk.
I like that shirt, by the way, or a sweater.
Speaker 2 (31:39):
Yeah you.
Speaker 4 (31:42):
Nice? Yeah, it looks it's a good, good cut.
Speaker 3 (31:43):
For the company. I was talking about that Morano.
Speaker 4 (31:46):
It's how you Oh yeah, Morano. I have to look
him up.
Speaker 3 (31:49):
They're really good.
Speaker 4 (31:51):
Is that online?
Speaker 3 (31:54):
I got.
Speaker 4 (31:56):
Sears or not Belk or something.
Speaker 2 (31:59):
Yeah, I got it Sears robot.
Speaker 4 (32:03):
I got it there with my Craftsman tools. Okay, all right?
Oh yeah. So I saw this post and someone said
like it was one of these montage posts with text
on screen, but it was like you say you would
die for your kids, but will you live for them?
And it was like will you take care of yourself,
(32:24):
Will you take your wife on dates? Will you show
them how.
Speaker 2 (32:28):
To be just?
Speaker 1 (32:30):
It is?
Speaker 5 (32:31):
That's the idea.
Speaker 4 (32:33):
So I think sometimes with that that idea is like,
you know, my parents were like, you know, you got
to think about your families, like I am. We're doing
this amazing experience together, and sure we don't have it
all figured out, but like that's a part of how
we live our lives, you know. So anyway, all that
to say, it is easy to hear those voices on
the outside, and I think we as trusted people of
friends who may be going through it or through something similar,
(32:55):
I think it's better to listen than to give advice
right away, because I think that can actually stoke the
crisis even harder.
Speaker 3 (33:06):
There's definitely, especially some personality types, if you tell them
to do something, they're always getting be the opposite.
Speaker 2 (33:11):
Yeah, so can't you just manipulate them? Yeah?
Speaker 4 (33:15):
Tyson the ultimate survivor. Guys, you can take Tyson off
the island, but you can't take the island off of
Tyson boom. Can't you just manipulate them? This is why
your daughters love you more. That's what we talked about
last week, and I'm sure it hasn't changed, except you
were going to implement something where you just told them
to like leave you alone or something to Rachel.
Speaker 2 (33:39):
Yeah, yeah, that didn't work.
Speaker 5 (33:41):
I mean I didn't really do that, I'm sure, yeah,
but yeah, I listening is good and being there and uh,
I do like that what you said, though, Bradley, because
it does like I used to live like that all
the time, what like what just whatever I wanted to.
Speaker 1 (34:03):
Do, you only once, let's go see it, let's go
do it. And now that I'm a dad, and I mean,
I can't just reset everything every time and just live
out of the trunk of my car like I could.
But even things that I did before, I'm like, we
can't do that. It's too dangerous. There's too big of
a risk that you know, we're gonna be in a
(34:23):
bad part of the world and something could happen. Whereas
before I was just like I'm just gonna skip through
this and it's dangerous maybe who knows. And now I'm like, no, no, no, no, no,
we can't go there. That's dangerous. And they're like, didn't
you used to be there all the time. Yeah, you
used to, but so I don't know, it's it's. Yeah,
(34:45):
I also.
Speaker 3 (34:45):
Think it's getting older and things becoming more monotonous. Like
there's definitely that aspect of it, as far as taking
danger and consideration. But it's also there's a lot of
things that I used to be so stoked about, but
now I'm less stoked about because I've already done them,
Like you know what I mean. Yeah, with travel, for instance,
(35:07):
I still love traveling, but I've also traveled a lot,
so it's just a lot less exciting than it used
to be.
Speaker 1 (35:13):
Yeah, and you hate airports. Every time you go to
an airport, you just hate it a little bit more.
That's where I like to be where when I get somewhere,
but it's almost not worth going to the airport for it.
Speaker 3 (35:23):
I used to love airports too, like I used to
love everything about travel. Now yeah, less and less things.
Speaker 4 (35:30):
Yeah, that's a good point too. Yes, that age.
Speaker 2 (35:34):
It is true.
Speaker 1 (35:35):
Like you watch your kids and they're so pumped about
every single thing, and you get to this thing where
it's like I don't feel the heighs or lows, you.
Speaker 3 (35:44):
Know, like.
Speaker 4 (35:46):
I'm emotionally dead.
Speaker 1 (35:48):
I don't feel I want a million dollars. Thank you,
you lost you lost fifty K. Thank you darn it.
Jarnt Yeah, exactly, you broke your leg. As long as
I don't feel much pain, who cares? And like that's yeah.
(36:08):
And my kids are like airplane. It's like, yeah, we
lived by an airport.
Speaker 2 (36:14):
Everybody stopped. There's another one.
Speaker 1 (36:17):
There's at the same time.
Speaker 2 (36:20):
Everyone count them.
Speaker 4 (36:21):
Look look at just six.
Speaker 1 (36:24):
Yeah, that's when we're passing cows. Tell me when we're
passing cows. I'm like, I really envy this and just
like wish I could be that.
Speaker 4 (36:37):
Still but driving. Look, there's a real dinosaur. Anyway, for
lunch today.
Speaker 1 (36:42):
Guys, we're gonna go Alien and big Foot holding hands
making out.
Speaker 4 (36:47):
But it's fine. I gotta get my coffee. We're going forward.
We got places to go. Let's do this. That's really funny.
Speaker 2 (36:55):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (36:56):
So here's a question. Could a midlife crisis actually be good?
Are there instances where people need to break out of
that and they need to blow something up. It's got
a negative connotation, but maybe it's not all bad.
Speaker 1 (37:10):
No, I think it can be positive. A lot of times.
I've never viewed it as necessarily negative. Even talking and
starting this podcast and stuff, I was like, we have
midlife crisis is that's what either puts you in situations
or motivates you to change or anything like that.
Speaker 3 (37:26):
So yeah, that could even be its own episode too.
That'd be fun to talk about when is a midlife crisis? Good?
Speaker 4 (37:34):
Yeah, we'll save it sets a tease teas for you guys.
The next one thing ELT's coming.
Speaker 2 (37:41):
Yeah, I think any takeaways from this episode.
Speaker 4 (37:46):
I think as we were processing through, I think, uh,
the idea of how important support is leading into a
crisis as someone's going through something small to give space,
you know, even if it impacts you a little bit,
you know, you can air your concerns, but doing it
in a way that's respectful of that person. And sometimes
(38:06):
that's just listening to you know, your buddy at coffee
being like man, I don't know, man, Like I'm not
feeling it with my wife anymore, and thinking it's you know,
just to listen instead of jump to a conclusion or
to advice or whatever. I think, because that crisis could
domino into other crisises as well, and you want to
just kind of take it, take it as it goes.
(38:29):
That's why I'm taking away.
Speaker 3 (38:30):
Yeah, the original question was like, how do you know
you're in the middle of a midlife crisis. And I
think that it's all about paying attention to yourself and
like things that have changed dramatically in the way that
you feel, the things that you do, and especially how
you feel about important things in your life like work
(38:51):
and family and kind of being in tune with those
things and then realizing when there's a big dramatic change
in them. And that's how you might know that you're
in the middle of a mid life crisis. And yeah,
talking to your friends and family and like Bradly saying too,
not necessarily listening if you're going through it, but sharing,
(39:12):
trying to reach out to people and sharing these changes
that you're experiencing and seeing what they think about it.
Speaker 2 (39:19):
Yeah. Yeah, I.
Speaker 1 (39:23):
Think like the drastic ones or something like that, I recognize,
but it's the smaller things that I don't fully recognize
until either in the future or if I really am
like take a step back and look at it. So
I think, yeah, I think you can listen to your
friends and family. They probably will tell you a little
(39:43):
bit if you're going through something like I've had moments
where Rachel's like, you seem like you're in a funk.
And so those moments are like, oh, yeah, I am.
Can I sit on the couch for just two more
days straight and then I'll be good? Or you know, yeah,
I don't know. I think, yeah, listen when someone's going
through it, but also listen to people around you when
(40:05):
maybe you don't recognize that you're going through it.
Speaker 3 (40:08):
Mm hmm.
Speaker 4 (40:09):
That's good. So bringing the heat, that's it.
Speaker 2 (40:13):
Thanks tuning in.
Speaker 1 (40:14):
Yeah, we'll have more next week. And uh, I think
we should get into crisises that are positive or can
be or maybe we view maybe if you are an optimist,
you can view most of these crisises as net positives.
Speaker 2 (40:33):
So and I.
Speaker 3 (40:33):
Would love to hear your guys' wake up calls when
you knew you were going through a midlife crisis or
kind of what the symptoms were for you when you
started to realize something was going on for audience love, yeah,
love love for you guys to message us, send us
a comment, whatever, And if there's some cool ones that
come in, we'd like to share them on the air too.
So let us know what your wake up moment was
(40:56):
when you realize you were going through a crisis. And
we can't wait to hear.
Speaker 4 (41:00):
Them, Yeah, make sure you like them subscribe too, because
that way you can get us back again each week
in your ears.
Speaker 1 (41:07):
If it looks like one of us is going through
a crisis and we don't know it, also feel free
to chime in and let us know.
Speaker 2 (41:14):
Talk to you next week.
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