June 2, 2025 • 40 mins
The Midlife Crisisses are back! On today's episode, Tyson Apostol (@tysonapostol) Bradley Hasemayer (@bhaz) and William Drumm (@williamdrumm) discuss setting boundaries and saying no to our kids, how to effectively communicate and make everyone happy.
Follow us on our social media!
Midlife Crisisses (@midlifecrisisses)
Tyson Apostol (@tysonapostol)
Bradley Hasemeyer (@bhaz)
and William Drumm (@williamdrumm)
Subscribe to us on Apple Podcasts and leave a review!
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/midlife-crisisses/id1779171406
Visit our brand new website!
Midlife Crisisses
Got a question for us? Send it to - midlifecrisisses@gmail.com!
Follow us on our social media!
Midlife Crisisses (@midlifecrisisses)
Tyson Apostol (@tysonapostol)
Bradley Hasemeyer (@bhaz)
and William Drumm (@williamdrumm)
Subscribe to us on Apple Podcasts and leave a review!
https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/midlife-crisisses/id1779171406
Visit our brand new website!
Midlife Crisisses
Got a question for us? Send it to - midlifecrisisses@gmail.com!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
Welcome back to Midlife Crisises. I'm Tyson, one of the hosts.
Thank you so much for liking, subscribing, commenting, sharing. All
of that stuff helps us continue to do this podcast,
and we would appreciate if you would continue to do
that each and every episode. We love you guys so much.
We want to keep doing this and that is one
of the ways to guarantee I mean nothing at that
(00:23):
guarantee then we will keep doing this. So smash that
subscribe button, that like button, that follow button, whatever buttons
are there, smash them all.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
And we really want to hear for you guys too.
We want to hear about your midlife crisises. We want
to know what kind of stuff you are going through
so that we can talk about it and share our
insights about trying to survive.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
This quote as well.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
So let's get into it.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
What's up, guys.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
This is Midlife Crisis is where we help you handle
your midlife problems by laughing and talking about our own.
I've got an important question today, and it has to
do with setting boundaries for our kids. What's the point,
how do we do it? And how can we get
better at it in the future.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Enjoy Welcome all to Midlife Crisis is the podcast where
we talk about going through midlife as humans, as men,
and all of the crisises that come with it, some positive,
some negative, and we're all just going through it. We're
all trying our best. Sometimes I guess I'm not always
trying my best. Like there's a lot of times I'm like,
I should be trying harder and I'm not.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
I don't shoot on yourself. Don't on yourself.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
That's right, I won't.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
I won't.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
Should I should my pants already love them. You shouldn't yourself, Yeah,
I shouldn't have. I'm Tyson Apostle, one of the hosts,
been on reality TV a bunch of times, and am
in the thick of my midlife. If I die at ninety,
then I'm exactly midlife because I'm forty five. Mathematically. I
am here with two co hosts. One is Bradley.
Speaker 4 (01:58):
Bradley, What's what's up, guys, Bradley Hazimayer coming to you
from the atl Piece up a town down. We got
a lot of great hip hop history here in Atlanta.
By the way, it's kind of nice to be associated
with such a cool city. A couple of kids five
and eleven, foster daughter who's twenty eight, and a dog
who's three. I'm going through my midlife crisis is just
(02:20):
trying to figure out our dog had something on their back,
got to take them in. Do we have dog insurance?
They got to pull this thing stuff? Yeah, we have
dog insurance. We have pet insurance.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
YEA, get you for everything?
Speaker 4 (02:32):
Oh yeah, you can, dude. I don't leave the house
anymore because it costs three hundred dollars just to leave
the house. I wait, costco, run a bite of food
on the way, and you come back. Come You're like, what,
I should have just stayed here. That's part of my
midlife crisis is like how how does life cost so
much to just not die? We're not even taking these extravagant,
(02:53):
expensive trips. It's just I just would like to live
another day? Why does it cost so much? So I'm
struggling with that. I'm figuring that out. I'm a content
creator and I got a lot of fun stuff going
on as well. We'll get to that later, but more importantly,
we have a question. Oh by the way, thanks for liking,
Thanks for subscribing, Thanks for being a part of this.
Without you guys, we're just three dudes talking in an
(03:15):
echo chamber, so we've got sperit numbers back. It's helpful
for us, but it's more important that we're doing this
for others. That may not be your perspective, Tyson, No,
because my perspective is also the same. It's really about
it's really about helping the other people. But we have
a blast doing it, and so it's a little bit
of a selfish We like to help you, but we're
(03:36):
having fun doing it. So I love that. Lots of
good stuff coming up, and so we're glad you guys
are a part of it. But today we have a
question from William William What you got?
Speaker 2 (03:46):
What's up everybody? William drum here, Denver's finest underwater photographer,
getting ready for a trip to Baja California next week
some diving.
Speaker 3 (03:57):
Doing some diving.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Hopefully we're going to see some sharks, maybe even some
orcas if everything goes well.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
You getting pumped for.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
That, any any other wildlife besides those two, Like, there's
a bunch.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
Of like hump back the time of year, this time
of year, you never know what you're gonna get. It's
amazing down there. They've been seeing blue whales, humpback whales,
sperm whales, til whales.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
I have.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
I've swam with blue whales in the Azores, some really
cool islands kind of between New York and Europe and insane,
like the tail easily twice as big as I am,
twice as long as I am. So yeah, blue whales
are so cool, but I've never seen them in really
clear water, and the ones that they've been seeing in
(04:43):
Baja recently just crystal clear water. Massive, massive animals. They're
really hard because even if they're swimming slowly, for them,
they're moving so fast, so it might look like they're
just kind of relaxing on the surface. You get in
the water and they're just like just keeping so fast.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
You can't keep up with them at all. Now, well,
sharks and as they meander, if you're kicking real hard
with your fins, you can keep pace with them, yeap.
Blue whales are so much faster, so.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
Much faster, So if the water isn't clear, like you
can barely see them. You have to have really good visibility.
So when I was in the Azores it was bad visibility.
I probably did one hundred and fifty two hundred jumps
off the boat into.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
The water with whales.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
But because of the visibility, we saw them like five
times either then it was hard so they would be
like from here to you know, thirty feet away. You
see them very clearly before you jump in the water.
You jump in the water and there's nothing down there
because it's so murky. So challenges. But Bradley, it's funny
because you were talking about how you can't leave the
(05:51):
house without spending a few hundred dollars.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
That's what it feels like.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
Well, I've got a question today and it has to
do with that. But it didn't even really have to
do it leaving the house. Yesterday, I was about to
leave the house. I opened my front door and there
was two big packages from Amazon on my doorstep. So
I said, huh, I don't remember order any ordering anything.
And my daughter, she's five years old, she just turned five,
(06:17):
she said, oh, my babies for your babies. No, she said, yeah,
I ordered babies on Amazon. You what, And I was like, oh,
this must be something I ordered, Like, you know, I
just moved, so I am getting a lot of new stuff.
Let's take a look. Open it up. Six of the
exact same lifelike baby doll three hundred dollars worth of
(06:41):
Amazon babies that my five year old had ordered on
my phone when I wasn't suspecting it. So I said,
we're sending these back. Instant tears, instant drava, you know,
running to the room, hiding. I tried to talk her
down for so long, but in the end, we kept
(07:04):
one of the babies, one fifty dollars lifelike baby, and
sent the rest back. And so my question today is
how do you say no to your kids. I'm so
bad at it. I am not good at saying no.
Like it was just her birthday. I just bought her
another lifelike baby. She got a hundred presents, and yet
(07:24):
she was able to order these and convince me to
keep one of them even though I had no intention
of it. And she's got so many babies already. So
my question today is how do you say no to
your children, especially when they drop in the tears or
you know, laid on thick exactly. So I'm interested in
(07:49):
hearing what you guys do. How you have I don't know,
strengthened your skin so you can say no more. And
you know a lot of time's obviously, you know, the
best thing for them. She doesn't need another baby in
her mind, she does and I'm a sucker. I need
some help on saying no to my sweet baby girl
(08:12):
who controls me in entire night.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
I mean, I think you do need to stock up
on dolls. It seems like we're going to go into
a doll shortage here where.
Speaker 4 (08:20):
I've heard yeah maybe usually I haven't heard that there's
gonna be a doll China.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
Say like, girls don't need thirty dolls. They only need
two or three or four or five or or six
or seven or eight or nine or ten or.
Speaker 4 (08:36):
Twenty nine or thirty.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
He's like a fifteen year old girl or a seven
year old girl, a fourteen year old baby, she doesn't
need that many dolls.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
Yeah, the eleven year old babyteen year old, imagine that
eleven year old baby girl. And you're like what so yeah,
so if there's a dolls, might actually you can talk.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
Some of those. Maybe I should just hold on to these.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
You should be investing them. So they were identical, like
she just like pushed pushed by six times in a
row on that like quantity up or yeah, pushed by
so hilarious, Wo, so funny. We've actually had to talk
to our kids about they can look on our Amazon.
They can window shop, but they are not allowed to buy.
If they buy, That's.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
What I thought she was doing.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
She's always yeah, she's figured it out. She's learned how
to move from window shopping or whatever to the full thing.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Just ours have done that, and we've been like, do
not or you will not be allowed to window shop
anymore on Amazon. This is a privilege, not right. And
if you are going to take advantage and just buy
the stuff as you see it, then I can't let
you look at that anymore.
Speaker 4 (09:45):
And your girls are how old?
Speaker 1 (09:46):
A eleven year old and a six year old? And
beloven that six right, both of them? No, no, no, eleven, six,
nine and six. She's about to turn tend baby girl. Yeah,
a nine year old baby girl. And they know and
they've been very good about that. We'll hand them our phone.
(10:07):
They're like, I just want to look on Amazon and
see what I can buy with my money. And the
one thing is that they save their money and they're like, okay,
I save thirty dollars, I want to buy this, and
I'll just buy it and not take the money from them,
just leave the cash in their piggy back.
Speaker 4 (10:18):
Oh, I take that money, but it's not my turn
right now.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
I should Sometimes I do, but usually I don't. But
it is hard because generationally, when I was growing up,
it was like, do not ask your parents for anything ever,
except for on your birthday or the holidays. Those are
the two times when you are allowed to tell your
parents what you want and then expect them to do
(10:43):
their best to get those things for you. But generationally
now it's like we go to Target and there's the
dollar bin of garbage right there, and okay, choose a
thing from the dollar bin. It's a dollar, and it's
not worth having a fight over for just one dollar.
Rather spend the dollar and have you just like not
(11:04):
argue with me or cry at me. The whole rest
of this is it.
Speaker 4 (11:07):
This is what your girls like you more your life.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
Rachel is the one that generally buys that. I almost
never do. So if we stop somewhere, I'm like, heads up,
we're not getting anything for us personally, going in to
get lunch meat and bread good and that's it. So
I always give them the heads up. Rachel is usually
the one that buys them stuff and then they come
to expect it. So then when she goes somewhere she doesn't.
(11:34):
That's worse. Yeah, and it's like right, so, but Rachel
will be like, who wants to go to the bookstore
and they're like, I do, and they know it's because
if they, you know, throw a fit, they'll get a toy.
And so I don't cave to that as often. And
one thing that I have been doing is I was like, listen,
we're not getting a toy. I've already said, and you
(11:56):
crying about it makes me want to do it less
because toys and games, I like to buy them. When
I want to buy them for you. It makes me
feel good when I can see that you're feeling good
about it, and I love to get that stuff for
you when you guys are on your best behavior and
are grateful and are you know, But when you're crying
about it, no, we've already ruined our day around this
(12:18):
toy that I haven't even bought. So I'm not not
into it, and so I try to, you know, And
usually they calm down when I have a conversation like
that with them. And I don't know if that's the
right thing, Like I'll probably have people on here being like, actually,
you're supposed to say use your words or some like
some hype catch phrase that's going around on Instagram right now.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
Whatever.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
I don't know what the thing is, but that's what
I do. It seems to work pretty well. Like just
reason with them about it, and also the tell I'm
telling them my truth, like why I am not going
to buy the toy, why I don't want to buy
the toy, and also their birthdays are coming up. I'm like,
write it down somewhere. If this is something you want,
write it down and right in which order you want things,
(13:01):
because we're not going to buy a trillion things for you.
So if this is on your list and it's at
the top of the list, yeah, we'll probably end up
getting it for your birthday. But if it's if you
just want it in the moment and it's not even
not the top of your list, like I'm not wasting
money on that, and some things too, I'll be like, oh,
you can buy that with your money. They're like, I
don't want to spend my money, Well, why would I
(13:23):
spend my money on it? Then if you're not willing
to spend your money on it. Yeah, so there's a
lot that.
Speaker 3 (13:29):
Goes into it.
Speaker 1 (13:30):
But it's like William, your daughter's younger, she's just learning
that stuff. But you also do have to create the boundary.
And I don't know the right way, but that's worked
for me, and sometimes there are tiers. But I also
was like, my parents would not have put up with
tears in a grocery store over a toy when I
(13:51):
was nine years old or seven years old or six
years old. In there, it's just different times. And it's
like we have such an abundance of cheap, bunk of
shit toys.
Speaker 3 (14:05):
Yeah, such an abundance.
Speaker 4 (14:07):
Yeah, well it's also worth we should throw the caveat
out there for everybody listening. All parents are going to
have their own version. It's your kids. You got to
do it your way. We're not saying this is the
only way, or this is even the right way. We're
saying this is the right way for our family. I
don't if it's not pivot. I'm just it's just what
you're doing. Yeah, but you bring up such a good
(14:29):
point in terms of the abundance of just stuff. It's cheap,
it's quick. I mean the whole Amazon aspect, the fact
that if I wanted something, I just get it kind
of right, Like, yeah, I even think about, like Christmas
is tough when I'm buying stuff now, or we're buying
stuff my wife and are buying stuff, especially if it's
for each other. It's like, well, I needed socks, so
(14:50):
I got them last week. I wasn't going to wait
like three months so that I could hopefully get them
at Christmas. But like, also the quality isn't as good,
so it didn't last as long. I don't There's like
a whole you know, confluence of so many different things,
the accessibility of it, you know, if if you didn't
have to. There's this great documentary on Netflix about halfway
(15:11):
through with it, and it's all about basically like just
the stuff, and they interview the person who made like
basically the buy now button on Amazon, and you know,
you look at you know, the the labor and what's
going into it in different countries, and we're looking at
how our landfills are just absolutely passed right there. Yeah. Yeah,
(15:32):
he was one of the heads at the Adidas Yeah exactly.
Speaker 1 (15:34):
I can't remember the name of that resurgence.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
It's interesting it's like maybe it's like more or buy
more or more now or something like that. And and
with that they just talked about like if you wanted
that baby doll, you would have to request, Hey, mom
and dad, can we go to the store. I can't
go today? Okay? Can we go to Target tomorrow?
Speaker 3 (15:54):
Okay?
Speaker 4 (15:55):
So then you have to schedule the time you have
to do, the time you have to go all the
way there, and then whatever's there is all you can
pick from. There's only two dolls. You're just gonna pick
from these two dolls. Yeah, but you know, and then
you have to make your decision, and then that's the one.
And then so it becomes like kind of an event
around acquiring something rather than how much easier it is
now where it's like I go on Amazon, you want
a baby doll? What do you want? I want a
(16:16):
baby doll with light skin, blonde hair in a farmer outfit.
Boom got you. Here's five different sizes and they can
all arrive tomorrow. You're like, what, Okay, I guess that's
what I'm gonna just click. But because the investment is
so much shorter and easier, easy come, easy go, right,
then the how much value is put on that is
(16:39):
really less about I finally have it because it was
such a such a quick thing as boom boom. It's here.
There's people like in their careers it's like you get rich,
you know, your trust fund, baby like whatever, you haven't
earned that thing. And so and we're in that too
as adults. I mean, that's not just something that our
kids are going through, but that acquiring of stuff. We've
talked a lot on the show about like getting more
(17:00):
things and more stuff because it's easier, even if it's
just not even necessarily cheaper, but it's like, oh I
could I went to the store and there were thirty
hats or on I was on Amazon and you know,
they had this deal on this. And so I think
for kids it's harder because it's harder because it's easier
you get it. And I see this with stuffies with
my daughter. So I have an eleven year old who's
a sixth grader, she's finishing sixth grade. And I have
(17:23):
a five year old. And in terms of the older side,
like with Ellis, she's our first and you know, we
were trying to figure it out as we go, and
and also she's wired differently than my five year old.
And so that's part of it too. It's like how
do you parent kind of differently within that and so
but for her, it is the acquiring of a thing
(17:43):
that she's going for that dopamine hit, you know, the
you know, kind of like the cliche of like go
treat yourself. You had a bad day, I'm gonna you know,
make my bad day go away with a shopping spree.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
You know, as becon as they get it on it,
they don't.
Speaker 4 (17:58):
That's it. It was about the acquiring, about the unboxing,
It's about that moment and then for the most part
then that's kind of it. And so you know, we've
really talked about with her, let's say with stuffies for instance,
if if you really want this, we're going to wait
two weeks. If you still want it, kind of like
(18:18):
Tyson you were talking about with you know, with Target.
If this is something you still want, then we can
talk about it. More than half the time it's gone.
We never hear about that thing that I all have
always wanted idea I add a little bit of like
so it's not just a snap judgment. It's not the
dollar bind because it's something that like you really want
and if you really want it, then we can talk
(18:39):
about why you want it. I want it because I've
got this collection I really want to add. I want
it because I really want to cuddle with it. Okay,
if there's a reason behind it, that's at least helpful,
not just I want it because I want it. So
that's that would be kind.
Speaker 3 (18:53):
Of like, I think that's a pretty good idea.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (18:56):
I do that for me too sometimes, Like I'll be
on Amazon and I'll be like, ooh, cheap hard drives,
you know, and I'm like, that's a great idea that
I'm like, wait a second, I don't really read. Oh
arg external charger, cool dude. And flash lights. Did we
talk about this?
Speaker 3 (19:13):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (19:14):
I love flashlights.
Speaker 1 (19:15):
Little pocket knives we talked about that's right, you're the
pocket knife guy. I love the little pocket knife and
I use them to open Amazon packages. But like I
need like seven.
Speaker 4 (19:22):
Of them, at least one for every room.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (19:26):
Yeah, so well I creating that space is helpful.
Speaker 3 (19:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:30):
I also and I think we've also talked about this, Mike.
My thing is if it's not taking up the new
number one spot, it's not worth buying.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
Like one favor.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
Why would you buy your third favorite pair of jeans
when you have two pairs that you like more than that,
Find your new favorite pair and demote one and two
to two and three, and now you've got something. So
I think that for me, that's always been how I've
how I've operated as far as clothing and fashion nose.
It's like, if is this my new favorite hat? If not,
(20:01):
then no reason to buy it, because I have my
favorite hat currently that I'm going to wear more than
this thing that I'm looking at buying.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
But with peoples out more like yeah, boundaries in general,
and like saying no in general, not necessarily around buying things,
but just everything, like you know, staying up later, or
eating different things, or like what are some swell tricks,
some tips, or standing your ground against your children When
they try to use that emotional.
Speaker 1 (20:31):
I tell them honestly why. I give them the reasons
of why, and I sometimes it's not enough, Like the
staying up too late. We can't stay up that late.
You can't because you can't get up on time for
the things we got to do. And you need your
sleep to be healthy. You need the x amount of
numbers of sleep. I as a parent, Like, my number
(20:51):
one goal is to keep you healthy and happy. That's
why we feed you things you don't always love. We
can't just feed you candy every day. That's why we
go to bed on time. It's why we make sure
that you get your exercise. It's so that you can
live a full life and be happy and healthy and
not sick and all those things. And so like going
to bed, and sometimes I'll check myself and I'll be like,
(21:14):
why am I not right? Now? Okay, you're right. I
don't care you are right. I am wrong.
Speaker 4 (21:20):
It's Friday nights, trying to Yeah, you don't have anything
tomorrow morning that's been canceled or whatever.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Baby fiasco. Last night, Roan went to bed at like ten,
maybe after ten. So yeah, I also didn't enforce that.
But it was also like the most fun night we've
ever had, like in so long because of me caving
for the baby.
Speaker 3 (21:42):
I don't know why.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
Also, I just wanted to say it was so hilarious yesterday,
like the emotional roller coaster from seeing these packages on
the front steps and just being so proud, so excited,
so happy that she was able to like get these
delivered to our house. To me being like what the
fuck and like telling you we have to send them
(22:05):
back to just like yeah, the peak, peak.
Speaker 3 (22:08):
Happiness, all.
Speaker 2 (22:11):
All of it to just such dark disappointments, so sad,
so mad.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
But then yeah.
Speaker 4 (22:19):
I think for her in there is a lot of autonomy,
you know, I mean understanding the situation of her going
back and forth right as you're continuing to go through
this divorce figuring out you know, there's there's she just
was in an apartment for a long time. Now it's
a new house. I mean that, and and and in
the long term, this is good, but there's a lot
of change happening right now. So all of a sudden,
she was able to control this thing and just like boom,
(22:42):
I did this. Look what I've done. I'm so proud
of myself. I took care of myself. I did this thing.
And then it's like, nope, that's that's out of your
control too. And it's like what you know, like I
see with my five year old, and I think kids
in general, I mean adults too. We were just talking
about this, but like it's all about control, and I
think control is so important in this like new new parenting,
(23:05):
gentle parenting, you know, we probably err on that side
of things versus like, you know, the corporal punishment side
of things. Kind of how I grew up and I've
had people kind of joke with me be like, uh,
you know, you know I want some ice cream? Wants
some ice cream. You're probably not gonna tell them no, right,
you never say no like this gentle parenting. No one
(23:26):
says no, And I'm like, no, We're definitely going to
say no because we're about creating boundaries. What we're not
going to do is just across the board say no
for everything. We're going to create opportunities for them to
weigh in. My wife is just off camera. Here are
you you want to add? Oh yeah, I'll translate this
(23:55):
for the podcasters as it's coming through. I'm just getting
this in from home Bay.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
In the business of shame.
Speaker 4 (24:03):
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah. The autonomy, the ability to make
a decision, yeah yeah, writer director always you can. You
can take the writer and director out of la but
you can't take that's true. Yeah, So there you go,
(24:29):
Welcome to the show. We had a guest just joined
us briefly. That's uh, Kirsten has them or my wife.
So the idea there being like they're like, imagine from
her perspective, she's just done all this and now now
that's a no. Right, so I actually like what you
did where it wasn't like an across the board, and
I don't think that's caving. Something we do a lot
with our five year old is the idea of compromise. Right.
(24:51):
We want them to have some kind of autonomy and
the decision, but it's also sometimes the illusion of choice.
It's not like not oh yeah, yeah, I mean Tyson
of course knows this. His career is predicated on the
illusion of choice, but you know, so it's it's instead
of like are we keeping all the dolls or not? Right,
they don't have that decision. You've you've created the A
(25:13):
or B. Now they get to take the quiz kind
of idea. Right, so you create those kind of the
rails of the boundaries as a healthy you're too young
to be able to do that. But then they exercise
a little bit of that muscle and then they can
take autonomy of like I made this choice or like
this is my thing. I picked this out and so
(25:34):
you know the value of that is that if the
parent is always the one saying yes or no all
the time. The kid's not learning to make decisions. Eventually,
when the kid grows up, mom and dad isn't there
and they're like, I don't really know how to make
a healthy decision. I was always decided for me. So
I actually don't think you should be so hard on
yourself on that. I think compromising with the doll was
(25:54):
a great choice. I think you know it's But in
those cases, at least, what we try to do with
Lowick is explain why we're making that choice so he
doesn't just feel like I want It's more like, hey,
you want three scoops of ice cream. I want you
to have zero scoops of ice cream. Let's compromise. We'll
do one scoop of ice cream after bath, right, Like,
(26:15):
so we're creating this moment or you know, whatever the
thing is. So Tyson, have you done stuff like that too?
You're nodding like, yeah, yeah, I agree.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
But also, you can't reward her in a way where
she thinks she can get on Amazon every time I
order ten things.
Speaker 4 (26:29):
Yes, you have to be explicit about that, so like, yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
This happens again, we're sending them all back and you
won't be allowed to look at Amazon on my phone
for a while. Part of it, too, is she's four.
She doesn't understand money. She doesn't under five, she doesn't
understand money. She doesn't understand how do you work to
earn those things to buy that stuff? And that's a
conversation I've had with my kids. It's just like, you
want that thing that's seventy five dollars, How do you
(26:55):
know how much time I have to put in to
earn seventy five dollars and what other things our family
can do with few dollars. This is just to quantify.
Speaker 4 (27:03):
Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
I like that to quantify in a way that hopefully
you understand how much it's going to take of time, energy,
and away from the things we have to get this thing.
Then it's and they, I know, even at nine and six,
they don't fully understand, but at least they're starting to
where it's like, Okay, if you're getting paid a dollar
(27:27):
a chore on Saturdays and you do five chores, that's
five dollars, and this is seventy five dollars. You have
to do seventy five a lot of saturdays over the course. Yeah,
So I was like so that's like and granted.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
Yeah, quantify it's really good. We did some other compromising too,
like there's some presence that she got for her birthday
that she hasn't really played with or like showed that
much interesting. So she was like, okay, we can we
can give this one back if we can keep the baby. Yeah,
so we did some other compromises. We can keep the baby.
Speaker 3 (27:58):
That verbic is great.
Speaker 2 (28:00):
And we also talked about not getting any more babies
for a long time because she's got these great babies
and it was just her birthday. I definitely said she's
not doing anymore Amazon shopping or window shopping on.
Speaker 3 (28:15):
The Amazon anymore. Uh.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
And we talked about money too, So I do think
there was some probably some good lessons after it. And
like I said, last night was after we went through
all that, we had a really great night together and
it was super fun and awesome.
Speaker 3 (28:31):
And I didn't make her go to bed until a
little late.
Speaker 4 (28:33):
So she got rewarded around and every she won, no question,
that was a big dub on her. Yeah, every time,
every time.
Speaker 3 (28:42):
That's why I'm talking to you guys about the boundaries.
Speaker 4 (28:45):
Well, I think it's got to be complicated too, because
like you talked like you know a lot of times
in and Tyson. I don't know how you guys play this,
but there's good cop bad cops sometimes, right, Like I
think you can't really make it that black and white.
There's certain things that I'm good at the Kirston's and
vice versa. It's not clear across the board, but I
would imagine if I was in a similar situation as
(29:06):
how I kind of assume and what you've told us
as well, William is like it's hard to be like
I only have you for a week and I have
to try to like create like help with boundaries or discipline.
I guess that's where really like talking with your ex
is like we got to be on the same Like
our laws have to be the same, whether you're in
this state or that state. Like you got to wear
(29:26):
your seat belt the whole time, you know, like those
types of boundaries, whatever they are. And I think that's
got to be tough because that's like an extra level
of communication that you've got to try to No, I can,
but I have chocolate at Mom's house where we're not
doing chocolate here, you know, Like, Oh, that's that's tough.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
Yeah, and really they like, you can't really do it
like that either, Like what happens at my house and
what happens at her mom's house they're different things, yes,
different everything. Yeah, so there's really no no give and
take in that way, like, hey, you can't give her
this or you can't do this because.
Speaker 3 (30:01):
It just doesn't work like that.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Yeah, and just constantly oh my mom, lets me do this,
Oh my mom lets me do this, Oh my mom.
Speaker 3 (30:08):
Lets me do this.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
It's it's hard, but we actually had that conversation this morning,
like it doesn't really matter what your mom lets you
do at her house because this is our house and
it's not the same place and we have different rules
at both houses.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
So yeah, yeah, it's it's wild.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Yeah, I think that's right. Though, I think you'll goal
within our relationship, it's like mom's rules are different than
some of my rules, Like I have rules that are
for us when we're together. She has rules for when
you're together, like you, if she wants to buy you
a toy in that moment, that's her decision. I'm not
buying you a toy right now because I realize how
(30:48):
many you have. Also with the abundance thing, to just backtrack,
but then come back to where we're at right now.
What we've been doing around birthdays and holidays is have
them go through their toys and donate.
Speaker 3 (31:03):
Yah'll get extra stuff.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
They will get a little extra on their birthday or
on the holidays if they are willing to donate the
toys that they don't play with me.
Speaker 4 (31:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
This morning, brow And asked if she could donate a
hat that doesn't fit her anymore. She's like, is there
another little girl who who might need a hat like this?
Because I don't. It doesn't fit me anymore, and I
would love to give it to somebody.
Speaker 4 (31:26):
I think that's that's a lot of maturity for a
five year old who actively wants to do that, and
obviously someone's put that type of idea into her. So
that's I think that's helpful. Yeah, so a baby, she's
a little baby, just your baby. I think the other
thing with discipline is like sticking to your guns, and
(31:47):
that's so hard sometimes, Like no, I know, we said
no food after bath. I know like that, but I'm
so hungry and so it's like I probably with my
first I was a lot more or like that's the
law an inch out of bounds is out of bounds.
With my five year old, I'm a little bit more lenient.
(32:08):
I think it's because a not my first kid, and
I know like the like the battles and the fights,
b I know how to just like try to manipulate
why I'm letting you have some pepperoni after bath? And
then also just I know, he's just different. He's a
different kid, you know, to go to snack. He loves pepperoni.
It's turkey pepperoni, which is nice. Not as much sodium.
Speaker 3 (32:29):
Went through a pepperoni phase too interesting.
Speaker 4 (32:31):
Yeah, yeah, it's one of the three things he'll eat.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
So when I go back to that Bradley, what you
said it, I ask myself, why why am I enforcing
this right now? If I can't come with a good
reason for why I'm enforcing it, then I'll just be like, yeah,
never mind, let's do it, Like yeah, oh no, your
bedtime's at seven thirty. We let you stay up till
eight on the weekends because you don't have anything. But
(32:58):
you know what, there's no good reason why has to
be eight. Let's go to nine. And I don't get Yeah,
like I the only reason I because I need some
time to myself at night too.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
Right, So yeah, I've been trying to talk to Rowan
about that lately too. It's like, listen, I have a
lot of stuff going on too, Daddy needs some time
for himself sometimes.
Speaker 3 (33:20):
And last night she me around the whole time.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
She's so attached right now, just like so clean, Like
she wants to hold my hand if we go outside,
like if I go upstairs, she follows me up there.
My mom actually had a fall in our driveway last week,
which was pretty brutal. So then that really freaked out Rowan.
So now every time she goes in the front yard
(33:45):
she wants to hold my hand because she's afraid of falling.
And yeah, she's a baby. I love her so much,
but I need to get some better boundaries for myself
because man, especially like I've had her for basically two
weeks straight, and there's so I've talked about this on
the podcast before, like I've got things that I got
to do and there's no time for myself. And because
(34:07):
I'm so I'm not great at setting boundaries. I need
to get better at it. But it just amplifies everything
when like I do have something that has to get
done or not even that. Sometimes sometimes there's some time
for myself and there's none of that, like, none of it.
So I do think that she's really good at reasoning
and good at kind of understanding some of those things
(34:30):
when I take the time to explain them to her.
Speaker 3 (34:33):
But it has to be like constant, and.
Speaker 4 (34:36):
Yeah, it can be exhausting.
Speaker 3 (34:39):
And with the I'm also lucky in.
Speaker 2 (34:41):
That she's not like around food and stuff like that,
Like she doesn't really want to eat ice cream every night,
and so there's a lot of maturity there too. And
just like her own choices, like she wants to eat
healthy even though she's only five, she knows that it's
good to eat healthy.
Speaker 3 (34:57):
So I think that helps a lot with some of
those parts.
Speaker 1 (35:00):
Yeah, I uh, what's your takeaways here, Bradley.
Speaker 4 (35:06):
I think what I'm taking away is the value of
discipline is important. The value of all the stuff we're
talking about is important. But also go easy on yourself, Dad,
go easy on yourself. Mom. You're doing your best, And
you know, every kid is a unique situation, Every situation
(35:29):
is unique, every family is different. I think as long
as you're thinking about getting better at it or what
can I be doing better or whatever. I think that's
the beginning when you get into just lacks of daisical
and it's like when you do it because it's easier
for you, like across the board, sometimes you have to,
but like that's when you've got to be like, wait
a second, that's not ultimately going to help me. When
(35:50):
they're fifteen or sixteen and they just decide why, yeah,
ask you why.
Speaker 3 (35:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
I think that from talking to this, talking about this
with you guys, I was super hard on myself yesterday
for letting her keep the baby because she just got
all her birthday presents.
Speaker 4 (36:08):
It felt like there's that dynamic.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
Yeah, But then talking about it with you guys definitely
makes me realize that there was some actual, pretty good
lessons in the whole thing for me and for her, Yeah,
and that it might actually be better in the long
run because another compromise that we made was that she's
not getting any babies for a long time.
Speaker 3 (36:26):
If she keeps this one baby, that's right, Yeah, And
maybe it's a secret win. I think it is.
Speaker 1 (36:33):
I think it's a win. I think that's a lesson.
Like if this is the first time it's happened, then
that's a lesson that need to be taught. And I
think my takeaway is like, take those moments to teach
and have conversations, have honest conversations with your kids. Even
if they don't fully understand the worth of a dollar
(36:55):
and all of those things, they eventually will. And if
you start those conversations early and honestly, uh, then it
will get easier and easier with time, and they'll be
more and more understanding. And so, like I've I will
discipline if so, yeah, Like sometimes I'll discipline and it
will be like what for what?
Speaker 3 (37:16):
Like I said?
Speaker 1 (37:17):
And so I think I sometimes have to check back
in with myself and be like why is what is
the why of this? And is the way worth it
right now? And if not? There's so many times where
they're like, can I have an otter? Pop? I was
like no, and they're like why is it? Cause they're
filled with sugar and they're not good for you and
they're like, I know, but it's hot outside. I was like,
it is hot and they're like, and we had lunch
(37:37):
and we had broccoli for lunch. You're like, you know what,
You're right, Like, why who cares? It's an otter pop like, yeah, yeah,
have an otter pop. We have them and if we
bottom for a reason, yeah pop. It's hot outside and
you guys are playing out there. That's great.
Speaker 3 (37:50):
I've also got rolland to start liking my broccoli smoothies.
Speaker 4 (37:53):
You guys nowear, I swear yes.
Speaker 2 (37:58):
Well, first it was spinach. Then I was out of spinach,
so I snuck in some sneaky broccoli last night, and
she dragged two smoothies with broccoli in them, so she's amazing.
Speaker 4 (38:09):
Yeah, it feels like AI.
Speaker 1 (38:11):
I think that's a how can you make broccoli taste
like anything less than fartsoli?
Speaker 4 (38:18):
BROCCOLI's it tastes like broccoli. No one's like this. Broccoli
tastes like chicken.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
You know, it's wow, it's sweet and delicious because you
put apple juice in it. That makes it sound even
more barf.
Speaker 4 (38:28):
And to be clear, I'm fine with broccoli as in
bron too factor some butter brocoli is not. Yeah, it's
it's you know, it's like a speedo at your wedding.
A speedo can be fine, a tuck should be fine,
but you can't. You can't mix those too.
Speaker 3 (38:44):
Yeah, well said, thank you.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
I just think there was a lot of really sage
advice in this one episode, So thank you guys so
much for helping me process this and figure out what
to do with yesterday and and some ideas for the
future and for me. Yeah, the takeaways were definitely don't
be hard on yourself all the time, and.
Speaker 4 (39:07):
Ask the why.
Speaker 3 (39:07):
Ask the why.
Speaker 2 (39:08):
Yep, reason with reason with your kids. Let them see
your logic, ask the why in how you're making your decisions,
and maybe give them that baby from time.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
All from time to time. You no shortages are coming,
Let's get those coming to make sure every every baby
teenager has a thirty dolls.
Speaker 3 (39:31):
Check back with me in a month and I might
have five lifelike baby dolls.
Speaker 4 (39:36):
We'll just see dolls, dolls across the shelf instead of
the plants and the bag, just like thirty dollars everywhere.
Speaker 1 (39:43):
Wow, that'd be great. All right, that'll do it here
at Midlife Crisises podcast again. Please like, share, subscribe, tell
us what you like about the episode, tell us what
you like about the podcast. Don't be shy, get on
there and comment. You can comment on Spotify. I guess
we started seeing those. Can comment on our YouTube channel
anywhere you can comment.
Speaker 4 (40:03):
Please do our Instagram as well at Midlife crisises follow
us there, hit us up DM, slide in that DM.
We'll get back to you.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
That's right un till next week see first
Welcome back to Midlife Crisises. I'm Tyson, one of the hosts.
Thank you so much for liking, subscribing, commenting, sharing. All
of that stuff helps us continue to do this podcast,
and we would appreciate if you would continue to do
that each and every episode. We love you guys so much.
We want to keep doing this and that is one
of the ways to guarantee I mean nothing at that
(00:23):
guarantee then we will keep doing this. So smash that
subscribe button, that like button, that follow button, whatever buttons
are there, smash them all.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
And we really want to hear for you guys too.
We want to hear about your midlife crisises. We want
to know what kind of stuff you are going through
so that we can talk about it and share our
insights about trying to survive.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
This quote as well.
Speaker 1 (00:47):
So let's get into it.
Speaker 3 (00:50):
What's up, guys.
Speaker 2 (00:50):
This is Midlife Crisis is where we help you handle
your midlife problems by laughing and talking about our own.
I've got an important question today, and it has to
do with setting boundaries for our kids. What's the point,
how do we do it? And how can we get
better at it in the future.
Speaker 1 (01:09):
Enjoy Welcome all to Midlife Crisis is the podcast where
we talk about going through midlife as humans, as men,
and all of the crisises that come with it, some positive,
some negative, and we're all just going through it. We're
all trying our best. Sometimes I guess I'm not always
trying my best. Like there's a lot of times I'm like,
I should be trying harder and I'm not.
Speaker 3 (01:30):
I don't shoot on yourself. Don't on yourself.
Speaker 1 (01:33):
That's right, I won't.
Speaker 3 (01:34):
I won't.
Speaker 1 (01:35):
Should I should my pants already love them. You shouldn't yourself, Yeah,
I shouldn't have. I'm Tyson Apostle, one of the hosts,
been on reality TV a bunch of times, and am
in the thick of my midlife. If I die at ninety,
then I'm exactly midlife because I'm forty five. Mathematically. I
am here with two co hosts. One is Bradley.
Speaker 4 (01:58):
Bradley, What's what's up, guys, Bradley Hazimayer coming to you
from the atl Piece up a town down. We got
a lot of great hip hop history here in Atlanta.
By the way, it's kind of nice to be associated
with such a cool city. A couple of kids five
and eleven, foster daughter who's twenty eight, and a dog
who's three. I'm going through my midlife crisis is just
(02:20):
trying to figure out our dog had something on their back,
got to take them in. Do we have dog insurance?
They got to pull this thing stuff? Yeah, we have
dog insurance. We have pet insurance.
Speaker 1 (02:31):
YEA, get you for everything?
Speaker 4 (02:32):
Oh yeah, you can, dude. I don't leave the house
anymore because it costs three hundred dollars just to leave
the house. I wait, costco, run a bite of food
on the way, and you come back. Come You're like, what,
I should have just stayed here. That's part of my
midlife crisis is like how how does life cost so
much to just not die? We're not even taking these extravagant,
(02:53):
expensive trips. It's just I just would like to live
another day? Why does it cost so much? So I'm
struggling with that. I'm figuring that out. I'm a content
creator and I got a lot of fun stuff going
on as well. We'll get to that later, but more importantly,
we have a question. Oh by the way, thanks for liking,
Thanks for subscribing, Thanks for being a part of this.
Without you guys, we're just three dudes talking in an
(03:15):
echo chamber, so we've got sperit numbers back. It's helpful
for us, but it's more important that we're doing this
for others. That may not be your perspective, Tyson, No,
because my perspective is also the same. It's really about
it's really about helping the other people. But we have
a blast doing it, and so it's a little bit
of a selfish We like to help you, but we're
(03:36):
having fun doing it. So I love that. Lots of
good stuff coming up, and so we're glad you guys
are a part of it. But today we have a
question from William William What you got?
Speaker 2 (03:46):
What's up everybody? William drum here, Denver's finest underwater photographer,
getting ready for a trip to Baja California next week
some diving.
Speaker 3 (03:57):
Doing some diving.
Speaker 2 (03:58):
Hopefully we're going to see some sharks, maybe even some
orcas if everything goes well.
Speaker 3 (04:02):
You getting pumped for.
Speaker 1 (04:03):
That, any any other wildlife besides those two, Like, there's
a bunch.
Speaker 2 (04:08):
Of like hump back the time of year, this time
of year, you never know what you're gonna get. It's
amazing down there. They've been seeing blue whales, humpback whales,
sperm whales, til whales.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
I have.
Speaker 2 (04:23):
I've swam with blue whales in the Azores, some really
cool islands kind of between New York and Europe and insane,
like the tail easily twice as big as I am,
twice as long as I am. So yeah, blue whales
are so cool, but I've never seen them in really
clear water, and the ones that they've been seeing in
(04:43):
Baja recently just crystal clear water. Massive, massive animals. They're
really hard because even if they're swimming slowly, for them,
they're moving so fast, so it might look like they're
just kind of relaxing on the surface. You get in
the water and they're just like just keeping so fast.
Speaker 1 (05:02):
You can't keep up with them at all. Now, well,
sharks and as they meander, if you're kicking real hard
with your fins, you can keep pace with them, yeap.
Blue whales are so much faster, so.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
Much faster, So if the water isn't clear, like you
can barely see them. You have to have really good visibility.
So when I was in the Azores it was bad visibility.
I probably did one hundred and fifty two hundred jumps
off the boat into.
Speaker 3 (05:27):
The water with whales.
Speaker 2 (05:30):
But because of the visibility, we saw them like five
times either then it was hard so they would be
like from here to you know, thirty feet away. You
see them very clearly before you jump in the water.
You jump in the water and there's nothing down there
because it's so murky. So challenges. But Bradley, it's funny
because you were talking about how you can't leave the
(05:51):
house without spending a few hundred dollars.
Speaker 3 (05:53):
That's what it feels like.
Speaker 2 (05:55):
Well, I've got a question today and it has to
do with that. But it didn't even really have to
do it leaving the house. Yesterday, I was about to
leave the house. I opened my front door and there
was two big packages from Amazon on my doorstep. So
I said, huh, I don't remember order any ordering anything.
And my daughter, she's five years old, she just turned five,
(06:17):
she said, oh, my babies for your babies. No, she said, yeah,
I ordered babies on Amazon. You what, And I was like, oh,
this must be something I ordered, Like, you know, I
just moved, so I am getting a lot of new stuff.
Let's take a look. Open it up. Six of the
exact same lifelike baby doll three hundred dollars worth of
(06:41):
Amazon babies that my five year old had ordered on
my phone when I wasn't suspecting it. So I said,
we're sending these back. Instant tears, instant drava, you know,
running to the room, hiding. I tried to talk her
down for so long, but in the end, we kept
(07:04):
one of the babies, one fifty dollars lifelike baby, and
sent the rest back. And so my question today is
how do you say no to your kids. I'm so
bad at it. I am not good at saying no.
Like it was just her birthday. I just bought her
another lifelike baby. She got a hundred presents, and yet
(07:24):
she was able to order these and convince me to
keep one of them even though I had no intention
of it. And she's got so many babies already. So
my question today is how do you say no to
your children, especially when they drop in the tears or
you know, laid on thick exactly. So I'm interested in
(07:49):
hearing what you guys do. How you have I don't know,
strengthened your skin so you can say no more. And
you know a lot of time's obviously, you know, the
best thing for them. She doesn't need another baby in
her mind, she does and I'm a sucker. I need
some help on saying no to my sweet baby girl
(08:12):
who controls me in entire night.
Speaker 1 (08:16):
I mean, I think you do need to stock up
on dolls. It seems like we're going to go into
a doll shortage here where.
Speaker 4 (08:20):
I've heard yeah maybe usually I haven't heard that there's
gonna be a doll China.
Speaker 1 (08:26):
Say like, girls don't need thirty dolls. They only need
two or three or four or five or or six
or seven or eight or nine or ten or.
Speaker 4 (08:36):
Twenty nine or thirty.
Speaker 2 (08:37):
He's like a fifteen year old girl or a seven
year old girl, a fourteen year old baby, she doesn't
need that many dolls.
Speaker 1 (08:44):
Yeah, the eleven year old babyteen year old, imagine that
eleven year old baby girl. And you're like what so yeah,
so if there's a dolls, might actually you can talk.
Speaker 3 (08:58):
Some of those. Maybe I should just hold on to these.
Speaker 1 (09:00):
You should be investing them. So they were identical, like
she just like pushed pushed by six times in a
row on that like quantity up or yeah, pushed by
so hilarious, Wo, so funny. We've actually had to talk
to our kids about they can look on our Amazon.
They can window shop, but they are not allowed to buy.
If they buy, That's.
Speaker 3 (09:19):
What I thought she was doing.
Speaker 2 (09:20):
She's always yeah, she's figured it out. She's learned how
to move from window shopping or whatever to the full thing.
Speaker 1 (09:28):
Just ours have done that, and we've been like, do
not or you will not be allowed to window shop
anymore on Amazon. This is a privilege, not right. And
if you are going to take advantage and just buy
the stuff as you see it, then I can't let
you look at that anymore.
Speaker 4 (09:45):
And your girls are how old?
Speaker 1 (09:46):
A eleven year old and a six year old? And
beloven that six right, both of them? No, no, no, eleven, six,
nine and six. She's about to turn tend baby girl. Yeah,
a nine year old baby girl. And they know and
they've been very good about that. We'll hand them our phone.
(10:07):
They're like, I just want to look on Amazon and
see what I can buy with my money. And the
one thing is that they save their money and they're like, okay,
I save thirty dollars, I want to buy this, and
I'll just buy it and not take the money from them,
just leave the cash in their piggy back.
Speaker 4 (10:18):
Oh, I take that money, but it's not my turn
right now.
Speaker 1 (10:21):
I should Sometimes I do, but usually I don't. But
it is hard because generationally, when I was growing up,
it was like, do not ask your parents for anything ever,
except for on your birthday or the holidays. Those are
the two times when you are allowed to tell your
parents what you want and then expect them to do
(10:43):
their best to get those things for you. But generationally
now it's like we go to Target and there's the
dollar bin of garbage right there, and okay, choose a
thing from the dollar bin. It's a dollar, and it's
not worth having a fight over for just one dollar.
Rather spend the dollar and have you just like not
(11:04):
argue with me or cry at me. The whole rest
of this is it.
Speaker 4 (11:07):
This is what your girls like you more your life.
Speaker 1 (11:11):
Rachel is the one that generally buys that. I almost
never do. So if we stop somewhere, I'm like, heads up,
we're not getting anything for us personally, going in to
get lunch meat and bread good and that's it. So
I always give them the heads up. Rachel is usually
the one that buys them stuff and then they come
to expect it. So then when she goes somewhere she doesn't.
(11:34):
That's worse. Yeah, and it's like right, so, but Rachel
will be like, who wants to go to the bookstore
and they're like, I do, and they know it's because
if they, you know, throw a fit, they'll get a toy.
And so I don't cave to that as often. And
one thing that I have been doing is I was like, listen,
we're not getting a toy. I've already said, and you
(11:56):
crying about it makes me want to do it less
because toys and games, I like to buy them. When
I want to buy them for you. It makes me
feel good when I can see that you're feeling good
about it, and I love to get that stuff for
you when you guys are on your best behavior and
are grateful and are you know, But when you're crying
about it, no, we've already ruined our day around this
(12:18):
toy that I haven't even bought. So I'm not not
into it, and so I try to, you know, And
usually they calm down when I have a conversation like
that with them. And I don't know if that's the
right thing, Like I'll probably have people on here being like, actually,
you're supposed to say use your words or some like
some hype catch phrase that's going around on Instagram right now.
Speaker 3 (12:39):
Whatever.
Speaker 1 (12:39):
I don't know what the thing is, but that's what
I do. It seems to work pretty well. Like just
reason with them about it, and also the tell I'm
telling them my truth, like why I am not going
to buy the toy, why I don't want to buy
the toy, and also their birthdays are coming up. I'm like,
write it down somewhere. If this is something you want,
write it down and right in which order you want things,
(13:01):
because we're not going to buy a trillion things for you.
So if this is on your list and it's at
the top of the list, yeah, we'll probably end up
getting it for your birthday. But if it's if you
just want it in the moment and it's not even
not the top of your list, like I'm not wasting
money on that, and some things too, I'll be like, oh,
you can buy that with your money. They're like, I
don't want to spend my money, Well, why would I
(13:23):
spend my money on it? Then if you're not willing
to spend your money on it. Yeah, so there's a
lot that.
Speaker 3 (13:29):
Goes into it.
Speaker 1 (13:30):
But it's like William, your daughter's younger, she's just learning
that stuff. But you also do have to create the boundary.
And I don't know the right way, but that's worked
for me, and sometimes there are tiers. But I also
was like, my parents would not have put up with
tears in a grocery store over a toy when I
(13:51):
was nine years old or seven years old or six
years old. In there, it's just different times. And it's
like we have such an abundance of cheap, bunk of
shit toys.
Speaker 3 (14:05):
Yeah, such an abundance.
Speaker 4 (14:07):
Yeah, well it's also worth we should throw the caveat
out there for everybody listening. All parents are going to
have their own version. It's your kids. You got to
do it your way. We're not saying this is the
only way, or this is even the right way. We're
saying this is the right way for our family. I
don't if it's not pivot. I'm just it's just what
you're doing. Yeah, but you bring up such a good
(14:29):
point in terms of the abundance of just stuff. It's cheap,
it's quick. I mean the whole Amazon aspect, the fact
that if I wanted something, I just get it kind
of right, Like, yeah, I even think about, like Christmas
is tough when I'm buying stuff now, or we're buying
stuff my wife and are buying stuff, especially if it's
for each other. It's like, well, I needed socks, so
(14:50):
I got them last week. I wasn't going to wait
like three months so that I could hopefully get them
at Christmas. But like, also the quality isn't as good,
so it didn't last as long. I don't There's like
a whole you know, confluence of so many different things,
the accessibility of it, you know, if if you didn't
have to. There's this great documentary on Netflix about halfway
(15:11):
through with it, and it's all about basically like just
the stuff, and they interview the person who made like
basically the buy now button on Amazon, and you know,
you look at you know, the the labor and what's
going into it in different countries, and we're looking at
how our landfills are just absolutely passed right there. Yeah. Yeah,
(15:32):
he was one of the heads at the Adidas Yeah exactly.
Speaker 1 (15:34):
I can't remember the name of that resurgence.
Speaker 4 (15:37):
It's interesting it's like maybe it's like more or buy
more or more now or something like that. And and
with that they just talked about like if you wanted
that baby doll, you would have to request, Hey, mom
and dad, can we go to the store. I can't
go today? Okay? Can we go to Target tomorrow?
Speaker 3 (15:54):
Okay?
Speaker 4 (15:55):
So then you have to schedule the time you have
to do, the time you have to go all the
way there, and then whatever's there is all you can
pick from. There's only two dolls. You're just gonna pick
from these two dolls. Yeah, but you know, and then
you have to make your decision, and then that's the one.
And then so it becomes like kind of an event
around acquiring something rather than how much easier it is
now where it's like I go on Amazon, you want
a baby doll? What do you want? I want a
(16:16):
baby doll with light skin, blonde hair in a farmer outfit.
Boom got you. Here's five different sizes and they can
all arrive tomorrow. You're like, what, Okay, I guess that's
what I'm gonna just click. But because the investment is
so much shorter and easier, easy come, easy go, right,
then the how much value is put on that is
(16:39):
really less about I finally have it because it was
such a such a quick thing as boom boom. It's here.
There's people like in their careers it's like you get rich,
you know, your trust fund, baby like whatever, you haven't
earned that thing. And so and we're in that too
as adults. I mean, that's not just something that our
kids are going through, but that acquiring of stuff. We've
talked a lot on the show about like getting more
(17:00):
things and more stuff because it's easier, even if it's
just not even necessarily cheaper, but it's like, oh I
could I went to the store and there were thirty
hats or on I was on Amazon and you know,
they had this deal on this. And so I think
for kids it's harder because it's harder because it's easier
you get it. And I see this with stuffies with
my daughter. So I have an eleven year old who's
a sixth grader, she's finishing sixth grade. And I have
(17:23):
a five year old. And in terms of the older side,
like with Ellis, she's our first and you know, we
were trying to figure it out as we go, and
and also she's wired differently than my five year old.
And so that's part of it too. It's like how
do you parent kind of differently within that and so
but for her, it is the acquiring of a thing
(17:43):
that she's going for that dopamine hit, you know, the
you know, kind of like the cliche of like go
treat yourself. You had a bad day, I'm gonna you know,
make my bad day go away with a shopping spree.
Speaker 3 (17:54):
You know, as becon as they get it on it,
they don't.
Speaker 4 (17:58):
That's it. It was about the acquiring, about the unboxing,
It's about that moment and then for the most part
then that's kind of it. And so you know, we've
really talked about with her, let's say with stuffies for instance,
if if you really want this, we're going to wait
two weeks. If you still want it, kind of like
(18:18):
Tyson you were talking about with you know, with Target.
If this is something you still want, then we can
talk about it. More than half the time it's gone.
We never hear about that thing that I all have
always wanted idea I add a little bit of like
so it's not just a snap judgment. It's not the
dollar bind because it's something that like you really want
and if you really want it, then we can talk
(18:39):
about why you want it. I want it because I've
got this collection I really want to add. I want
it because I really want to cuddle with it. Okay,
if there's a reason behind it, that's at least helpful,
not just I want it because I want it. So
that's that would be kind.
Speaker 3 (18:53):
Of like, I think that's a pretty good idea.
Speaker 1 (18:56):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (18:56):
I do that for me too sometimes, Like I'll be
on Amazon and I'll be like, ooh, cheap hard drives,
you know, and I'm like, that's a great idea that
I'm like, wait a second, I don't really read. Oh
arg external charger, cool dude. And flash lights. Did we
talk about this?
Speaker 3 (19:13):
Yeah?
Speaker 4 (19:14):
I love flashlights.
Speaker 1 (19:15):
Little pocket knives we talked about that's right, you're the
pocket knife guy. I love the little pocket knife and
I use them to open Amazon packages. But like I
need like seven.
Speaker 4 (19:22):
Of them, at least one for every room.
Speaker 1 (19:25):
Yeah.
Speaker 4 (19:26):
Yeah, so well I creating that space is helpful.
Speaker 3 (19:30):
Yeah.
Speaker 1 (19:30):
I also and I think we've also talked about this, Mike.
My thing is if it's not taking up the new
number one spot, it's not worth buying.
Speaker 4 (19:38):
Like one favor.
Speaker 1 (19:39):
Why would you buy your third favorite pair of jeans
when you have two pairs that you like more than that,
Find your new favorite pair and demote one and two
to two and three, and now you've got something. So
I think that for me, that's always been how I've
how I've operated as far as clothing and fashion nose.
It's like, if is this my new favorite hat? If not,
(20:01):
then no reason to buy it, because I have my
favorite hat currently that I'm going to wear more than
this thing that I'm looking at buying.
Speaker 2 (20:09):
But with peoples out more like yeah, boundaries in general,
and like saying no in general, not necessarily around buying things,
but just everything, like you know, staying up later, or
eating different things, or like what are some swell tricks,
some tips, or standing your ground against your children When
they try to use that emotional.
Speaker 1 (20:31):
I tell them honestly why. I give them the reasons
of why, and I sometimes it's not enough, Like the
staying up too late. We can't stay up that late.
You can't because you can't get up on time for
the things we got to do. And you need your
sleep to be healthy. You need the x amount of
numbers of sleep. I as a parent, Like, my number
(20:51):
one goal is to keep you healthy and happy. That's
why we feed you things you don't always love. We
can't just feed you candy every day. That's why we
go to bed on time. It's why we make sure
that you get your exercise. It's so that you can
live a full life and be happy and healthy and
not sick and all those things. And so like going
to bed, and sometimes I'll check myself and I'll be like,
(21:14):
why am I not right? Now? Okay, you're right. I
don't care you are right. I am wrong.
Speaker 4 (21:20):
It's Friday nights, trying to Yeah, you don't have anything
tomorrow morning that's been canceled or whatever.
Speaker 2 (21:25):
Baby fiasco. Last night, Roan went to bed at like ten,
maybe after ten. So yeah, I also didn't enforce that.
But it was also like the most fun night we've
ever had, like in so long because of me caving
for the baby.
Speaker 3 (21:42):
I don't know why.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
Also, I just wanted to say it was so hilarious yesterday,
like the emotional roller coaster from seeing these packages on
the front steps and just being so proud, so excited,
so happy that she was able to like get these
delivered to our house. To me being like what the
fuck and like telling you we have to send them
(22:05):
back to just like yeah, the peak, peak.
Speaker 3 (22:08):
Happiness, all.
Speaker 2 (22:11):
All of it to just such dark disappointments, so sad,
so mad.
Speaker 3 (22:18):
But then yeah.
Speaker 4 (22:19):
I think for her in there is a lot of autonomy,
you know, I mean understanding the situation of her going
back and forth right as you're continuing to go through
this divorce figuring out you know, there's there's she just
was in an apartment for a long time. Now it's
a new house. I mean that, and and and in
the long term, this is good, but there's a lot
of change happening right now. So all of a sudden,
she was able to control this thing and just like boom,
(22:42):
I did this. Look what I've done. I'm so proud
of myself. I took care of myself. I did this thing.
And then it's like, nope, that's that's out of your
control too. And it's like what you know, like I
see with my five year old, and I think kids
in general, I mean adults too. We were just talking
about this, but like it's all about control, and I
think control is so important in this like new new parenting,
(23:05):
gentle parenting, you know, we probably err on that side
of things versus like, you know, the corporal punishment side
of things. Kind of how I grew up and I've
had people kind of joke with me be like, uh,
you know, you know I want some ice cream? Wants
some ice cream. You're probably not gonna tell them no, right,
you never say no like this gentle parenting. No one
(23:26):
says no, And I'm like, no, We're definitely going to
say no because we're about creating boundaries. What we're not
going to do is just across the board say no
for everything. We're going to create opportunities for them to
weigh in. My wife is just off camera. Here are
you you want to add? Oh yeah, I'll translate this
(23:55):
for the podcasters as it's coming through. I'm just getting
this in from home Bay.
Speaker 1 (24:01):
In the business of shame.
Speaker 4 (24:03):
Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah. The autonomy, the ability to make
a decision, yeah yeah, writer director always you can. You
can take the writer and director out of la but
you can't take that's true. Yeah, So there you go,
(24:29):
Welcome to the show. We had a guest just joined
us briefly. That's uh, Kirsten has them or my wife.
So the idea there being like they're like, imagine from
her perspective, she's just done all this and now now
that's a no. Right, so I actually like what you
did where it wasn't like an across the board, and
I don't think that's caving. Something we do a lot
with our five year old is the idea of compromise. Right.
(24:51):
We want them to have some kind of autonomy and
the decision, but it's also sometimes the illusion of choice.
It's not like not oh yeah, yeah, I mean Tyson
of course knows this. His career is predicated on the
illusion of choice, but you know, so it's it's instead
of like are we keeping all the dolls or not? Right,
they don't have that decision. You've you've created the A
(25:13):
or B. Now they get to take the quiz kind
of idea. Right, so you create those kind of the
rails of the boundaries as a healthy you're too young
to be able to do that. But then they exercise
a little bit of that muscle and then they can
take autonomy of like I made this choice or like
this is my thing. I picked this out and so
(25:34):
you know the value of that is that if the
parent is always the one saying yes or no all
the time. The kid's not learning to make decisions. Eventually,
when the kid grows up, mom and dad isn't there
and they're like, I don't really know how to make
a healthy decision. I was always decided for me. So
I actually don't think you should be so hard on
yourself on that. I think compromising with the doll was
(25:54):
a great choice. I think you know it's But in
those cases, at least, what we try to do with
Lowick is explain why we're making that choice so he
doesn't just feel like I want It's more like, hey,
you want three scoops of ice cream. I want you
to have zero scoops of ice cream. Let's compromise. We'll
do one scoop of ice cream after bath, right, Like,
(26:15):
so we're creating this moment or you know, whatever the
thing is. So Tyson, have you done stuff like that too?
You're nodding like, yeah, yeah, I agree.
Speaker 1 (26:22):
But also, you can't reward her in a way where
she thinks she can get on Amazon every time I
order ten things.
Speaker 4 (26:29):
Yes, you have to be explicit about that, so like, yeah.
Speaker 1 (26:32):
This happens again, we're sending them all back and you
won't be allowed to look at Amazon on my phone
for a while. Part of it, too, is she's four.
She doesn't understand money. She doesn't under five, she doesn't
understand money. She doesn't understand how do you work to
earn those things to buy that stuff? And that's a
conversation I've had with my kids. It's just like, you
want that thing that's seventy five dollars, How do you
(26:55):
know how much time I have to put in to
earn seventy five dollars and what other things our family
can do with few dollars. This is just to quantify.
Speaker 4 (27:03):
Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 1 (27:04):
I like that to quantify in a way that hopefully
you understand how much it's going to take of time, energy,
and away from the things we have to get this thing.
Then it's and they, I know, even at nine and six,
they don't fully understand, but at least they're starting to
where it's like, Okay, if you're getting paid a dollar
(27:27):
a chore on Saturdays and you do five chores, that's
five dollars, and this is seventy five dollars. You have
to do seventy five a lot of saturdays over the course. Yeah,
So I was like so that's like and granted.
Speaker 2 (27:38):
Yeah, quantify it's really good. We did some other compromising too,
like there's some presence that she got for her birthday
that she hasn't really played with or like showed that
much interesting. So she was like, okay, we can we
can give this one back if we can keep the baby. Yeah,
so we did some other compromises. We can keep the baby.
Speaker 3 (27:58):
That verbic is great.
Speaker 2 (28:00):
And we also talked about not getting any more babies
for a long time because she's got these great babies
and it was just her birthday. I definitely said she's
not doing anymore Amazon shopping or window shopping on.
Speaker 3 (28:15):
The Amazon anymore. Uh.
Speaker 2 (28:18):
And we talked about money too, So I do think
there was some probably some good lessons after it. And
like I said, last night was after we went through
all that, we had a really great night together and
it was super fun and awesome.
Speaker 3 (28:31):
And I didn't make her go to bed until a
little late.
Speaker 4 (28:33):
So she got rewarded around and every she won, no question,
that was a big dub on her. Yeah, every time,
every time.
Speaker 3 (28:42):
That's why I'm talking to you guys about the boundaries.
Speaker 4 (28:45):
Well, I think it's got to be complicated too, because
like you talked like you know a lot of times
in and Tyson. I don't know how you guys play this,
but there's good cop bad cops sometimes, right, Like I
think you can't really make it that black and white.
There's certain things that I'm good at the Kirston's and
vice versa. It's not clear across the board, but I
would imagine if I was in a similar situation as
(29:06):
how I kind of assume and what you've told us
as well, William is like it's hard to be like
I only have you for a week and I have
to try to like create like help with boundaries or discipline.
I guess that's where really like talking with your ex
is like we got to be on the same Like
our laws have to be the same, whether you're in
this state or that state. Like you got to wear
(29:26):
your seat belt the whole time, you know, like those
types of boundaries, whatever they are. And I think that's
got to be tough because that's like an extra level
of communication that you've got to try to No, I can,
but I have chocolate at Mom's house where we're not
doing chocolate here, you know, Like, Oh, that's that's tough.
Speaker 2 (29:42):
Yeah, and really they like, you can't really do it
like that either, Like what happens at my house and
what happens at her mom's house they're different things, yes,
different everything. Yeah, so there's really no no give and
take in that way, like, hey, you can't give her
this or you can't do this because.
Speaker 3 (30:01):
It just doesn't work like that.
Speaker 2 (30:02):
Yeah, and just constantly oh my mom, lets me do this,
Oh my mom lets me do this, Oh my mom.
Speaker 3 (30:08):
Lets me do this.
Speaker 2 (30:09):
It's it's hard, but we actually had that conversation this morning,
like it doesn't really matter what your mom lets you
do at her house because this is our house and
it's not the same place and we have different rules
at both houses.
Speaker 3 (30:23):
So yeah, yeah, it's it's wild.
Speaker 1 (30:26):
Yeah, I think that's right. Though, I think you'll goal
within our relationship, it's like mom's rules are different than
some of my rules, Like I have rules that are
for us when we're together. She has rules for when
you're together, like you, if she wants to buy you
a toy in that moment, that's her decision. I'm not
buying you a toy right now because I realize how
(30:48):
many you have. Also with the abundance thing, to just backtrack,
but then come back to where we're at right now.
What we've been doing around birthdays and holidays is have
them go through their toys and donate.
Speaker 3 (31:03):
Yah'll get extra stuff.
Speaker 1 (31:05):
They will get a little extra on their birthday or
on the holidays if they are willing to donate the
toys that they don't play with me.
Speaker 4 (31:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (31:16):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (31:16):
This morning, brow And asked if she could donate a
hat that doesn't fit her anymore. She's like, is there
another little girl who who might need a hat like this?
Because I don't. It doesn't fit me anymore, and I
would love to give it to somebody.
Speaker 4 (31:26):
I think that's that's a lot of maturity for a
five year old who actively wants to do that, and
obviously someone's put that type of idea into her. So
that's I think that's helpful. Yeah, so a baby, she's
a little baby, just your baby. I think the other
thing with discipline is like sticking to your guns, and
(31:47):
that's so hard sometimes, Like no, I know, we said
no food after bath. I know like that, but I'm
so hungry and so it's like I probably with my
first I was a lot more or like that's the
law an inch out of bounds is out of bounds.
With my five year old, I'm a little bit more lenient.
(32:08):
I think it's because a not my first kid, and
I know like the like the battles and the fights,
b I know how to just like try to manipulate
why I'm letting you have some pepperoni after bath? And
then also just I know, he's just different. He's a
different kid, you know, to go to snack. He loves pepperoni.
It's turkey pepperoni, which is nice. Not as much sodium.
Speaker 3 (32:29):
Went through a pepperoni phase too interesting.
Speaker 4 (32:31):
Yeah, yeah, it's one of the three things he'll eat.
Speaker 1 (32:34):
So when I go back to that Bradley, what you
said it, I ask myself, why why am I enforcing
this right now? If I can't come with a good
reason for why I'm enforcing it, then I'll just be like, yeah,
never mind, let's do it, Like yeah, oh no, your
bedtime's at seven thirty. We let you stay up till
eight on the weekends because you don't have anything. But
(32:58):
you know what, there's no good reason why has to
be eight. Let's go to nine. And I don't get Yeah,
like I the only reason I because I need some
time to myself at night too.
Speaker 2 (33:08):
Right, So yeah, I've been trying to talk to Rowan
about that lately too. It's like, listen, I have a
lot of stuff going on too, Daddy needs some time
for himself sometimes.
Speaker 3 (33:20):
And last night she me around the whole time.
Speaker 2 (33:23):
She's so attached right now, just like so clean, Like
she wants to hold my hand if we go outside,
like if I go upstairs, she follows me up there.
My mom actually had a fall in our driveway last week,
which was pretty brutal. So then that really freaked out Rowan.
So now every time she goes in the front yard
(33:45):
she wants to hold my hand because she's afraid of falling.
And yeah, she's a baby. I love her so much,
but I need to get some better boundaries for myself
because man, especially like I've had her for basically two
weeks straight, and there's so I've talked about this on
the podcast before, like I've got things that I got
to do and there's no time for myself. And because
(34:07):
I'm so I'm not great at setting boundaries. I need
to get better at it. But it just amplifies everything
when like I do have something that has to get
done or not even that. Sometimes sometimes there's some time
for myself and there's none of that, like, none of it.
So I do think that she's really good at reasoning
and good at kind of understanding some of those things
(34:30):
when I take the time to explain them to her.
Speaker 3 (34:33):
But it has to be like constant, and.
Speaker 4 (34:36):
Yeah, it can be exhausting.
Speaker 3 (34:39):
And with the I'm also lucky in.
Speaker 2 (34:41):
That she's not like around food and stuff like that,
Like she doesn't really want to eat ice cream every night,
and so there's a lot of maturity there too. And
just like her own choices, like she wants to eat
healthy even though she's only five, she knows that it's
good to eat healthy.
Speaker 3 (34:57):
So I think that helps a lot with some of
those parts.
Speaker 1 (35:00):
Yeah, I uh, what's your takeaways here, Bradley.
Speaker 4 (35:06):
I think what I'm taking away is the value of
discipline is important. The value of all the stuff we're
talking about is important. But also go easy on yourself, Dad,
go easy on yourself. Mom. You're doing your best, And
you know, every kid is a unique situation, Every situation
(35:29):
is unique, every family is different. I think as long
as you're thinking about getting better at it or what
can I be doing better or whatever. I think that's
the beginning when you get into just lacks of daisical
and it's like when you do it because it's easier
for you, like across the board, sometimes you have to,
but like that's when you've got to be like, wait
a second, that's not ultimately going to help me. When
(35:50):
they're fifteen or sixteen and they just decide why, yeah,
ask you why.
Speaker 3 (35:57):
Yeah.
Speaker 2 (35:58):
I think that from talking to this, talking about this
with you guys, I was super hard on myself yesterday
for letting her keep the baby because she just got
all her birthday presents.
Speaker 4 (36:08):
It felt like there's that dynamic.
Speaker 2 (36:11):
Yeah, But then talking about it with you guys definitely
makes me realize that there was some actual, pretty good
lessons in the whole thing for me and for her, Yeah,
and that it might actually be better in the long
run because another compromise that we made was that she's
not getting any babies for a long time.
Speaker 3 (36:26):
If she keeps this one baby, that's right, Yeah, And
maybe it's a secret win. I think it is.
Speaker 1 (36:33):
I think it's a win. I think that's a lesson.
Like if this is the first time it's happened, then
that's a lesson that need to be taught. And I
think my takeaway is like, take those moments to teach
and have conversations, have honest conversations with your kids. Even
if they don't fully understand the worth of a dollar
(36:55):
and all of those things, they eventually will. And if
you start those conversations early and honestly, uh, then it
will get easier and easier with time, and they'll be
more and more understanding. And so, like I've I will
discipline if so, yeah, Like sometimes I'll discipline and it
will be like what for what?
Speaker 3 (37:16):
Like I said?
Speaker 1 (37:17):
And so I think I sometimes have to check back
in with myself and be like why is what is
the why of this? And is the way worth it
right now? And if not? There's so many times where
they're like, can I have an otter? Pop? I was
like no, and they're like why is it? Cause they're
filled with sugar and they're not good for you and
they're like, I know, but it's hot outside. I was like,
it is hot and they're like, and we had lunch
(37:37):
and we had broccoli for lunch. You're like, you know what,
You're right, Like, why who cares? It's an otter pop like, yeah, yeah,
have an otter pop. We have them and if we
bottom for a reason, yeah pop. It's hot outside and
you guys are playing out there. That's great.
Speaker 3 (37:50):
I've also got rolland to start liking my broccoli smoothies.
Speaker 4 (37:53):
You guys nowear, I swear yes.
Speaker 2 (37:58):
Well, first it was spinach. Then I was out of spinach,
so I snuck in some sneaky broccoli last night, and
she dragged two smoothies with broccoli in them, so she's amazing.
Speaker 4 (38:09):
Yeah, it feels like AI.
Speaker 1 (38:11):
I think that's a how can you make broccoli taste
like anything less than fartsoli?
Speaker 4 (38:18):
BROCCOLI's it tastes like broccoli. No one's like this. Broccoli
tastes like chicken.
Speaker 1 (38:21):
You know, it's wow, it's sweet and delicious because you
put apple juice in it. That makes it sound even
more barf.
Speaker 4 (38:28):
And to be clear, I'm fine with broccoli as in
bron too factor some butter brocoli is not. Yeah, it's
it's you know, it's like a speedo at your wedding.
A speedo can be fine, a tuck should be fine,
but you can't. You can't mix those too.
Speaker 3 (38:44):
Yeah, well said, thank you.
Speaker 2 (38:47):
I just think there was a lot of really sage
advice in this one episode, So thank you guys so
much for helping me process this and figure out what
to do with yesterday and and some ideas for the
future and for me. Yeah, the takeaways were definitely don't
be hard on yourself all the time, and.
Speaker 4 (39:07):
Ask the why.
Speaker 3 (39:07):
Ask the why.
Speaker 2 (39:08):
Yep, reason with reason with your kids. Let them see
your logic, ask the why in how you're making your decisions,
and maybe give them that baby from time.
Speaker 1 (39:21):
All from time to time. You no shortages are coming,
Let's get those coming to make sure every every baby
teenager has a thirty dolls.
Speaker 3 (39:31):
Check back with me in a month and I might
have five lifelike baby dolls.
Speaker 4 (39:36):
We'll just see dolls, dolls across the shelf instead of
the plants and the bag, just like thirty dollars everywhere.
Speaker 1 (39:43):
Wow, that'd be great. All right, that'll do it here
at Midlife Crisises podcast again. Please like, share, subscribe, tell
us what you like about the episode, tell us what
you like about the podcast. Don't be shy, get on
there and comment. You can comment on Spotify. I guess
we started seeing those. Can comment on our YouTube channel
anywhere you can comment.
Speaker 4 (40:03):
Please do our Instagram as well at Midlife crisises follow
us there, hit us up DM, slide in that DM.
We'll get back to you.
Speaker 1 (40:10):
That's right un till next week see first
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies!
The Breakfast Club
The World's Most Dangerous Morning Show, The Breakfast Club, With DJ Envy, Jess Hilarious, And Charlamagne Tha God!