Cyborg 3 & Moon 44

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
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Speaker 1 (00:50):
X No one under seventeen admitted.

Speaker 3 (00:55):
I have a story that I can tell about the
Horror Convention, and then we'll tie in with one of
the movies. So I have to wait until we get there.
But just remind me for Moon forty four that I
have a festal story in it.

Speaker 4 (01:08):
Though it is it a story about Malcolm McDowell showing up,
because that would be.

Speaker 3 (01:17):
Oh no, it's not Moon forty four. It's Recycler.

Speaker 4 (01:19):
Sorry, is it is it a story about Malcolm McDowell's.

Speaker 3 (01:26):
That's how I realized it wasn't because I started to think, like,
now this guy hangs out with Malcolm McDowell though, and
I'm like, wait, I'm thinking of the wrong movie. You
finally get your kid to go to bed, Doug, Yeah,
it's being uncooperative today.

Speaker 5 (01:44):
He just doesn't believe in sleep.

Speaker 4 (01:46):
Well, that's a actual consequence of being a child.

Speaker 3 (01:51):
He will at some point, it will just be far
too late by then.

Speaker 5 (01:54):
Yeah, no, you will as soon as you know. I
need him to get up.

Speaker 3 (01:59):
But yeah, just wait till you're sixteen. Won't get up
for anything.

Speaker 5 (02:03):
He's doing this fun thing where he stays up extra
late every night, but he also gets up early every morning.
Kids are the worst. Then during the day when I'm
like we should do something, he's like, I'm too tired,
and I'm like, I think I know why.

Speaker 4 (02:18):
No, no shit, you little asshole.

Speaker 3 (02:24):
Look at you for being an involved dad and wanted
to do shit.

Speaker 5 (02:29):
It always backfires.

Speaker 4 (02:31):
You're gonna wear the shirt of the band, You're gonna
go see.

Speaker 5 (02:33):
Don't be that guy. Don't be that guy.

Speaker 3 (02:37):
That was the point. But you had to get that
first part in all right, So would you do this
weekend doing anything fun?

Speaker 4 (02:47):
What did I do?

Speaker 5 (02:48):
I go to a water park the other day. That's
always fun.

Speaker 3 (02:52):
You're like, I can't wait to wait and a bunch
of yeurine soaked water.

Speaker 5 (02:57):
You don't wait in very much. But most of it
you're just sliding through. It's going down so fast that
it's constantly being filtered.

Speaker 3 (03:06):
I mean, that's what we want to believe.

Speaker 4 (03:08):
Plus the high levels of ammonia helped keep the bacteria
from spreading. Exactly do what now?

Speaker 3 (03:21):
Did you do anything fun in the movie?

Speaker 4 (03:22):
I did not.

Speaker 5 (03:25):
Yeah, we stayed at a hotel. We went to the
water park, and there was a strip club across the street.
So I had to keep hoping my kid didn't ask questions.

Speaker 3 (03:33):
You said, you're gonna take him to his first strip club.

Speaker 4 (03:35):
No, that's that's where men go to see titties.

Speaker 5 (03:38):
My son, what we were like like the like shitty
buffet breakfast to get at a hotel. When we went
to get it, he's like, we sit down on the
patio and I'm like sure, and we sit out there
and it's like right across the street from this. All right,
He's like, what is Fluffers had a free buffet sign too,
so I was like waiting for him to figure out

(04:00):
that we were eating a free buffet, but there was
another free buffet across the street.

Speaker 3 (04:04):
It's like, can we go get can we go get
that buffet? You're like, I can, but you can't.

Speaker 4 (04:10):
And you know, you know what the big difference is,
they probably have chicken wings.

Speaker 3 (04:15):
I've never understood eating in a strip club.

Speaker 5 (04:17):
I have never eaten at a strip club. I have
been offered free food at a strip club, and I
was like, there's no chance I would take I.

Speaker 4 (04:25):
Can tell you that. So while I was going to
college in Minneapolis, we went to the They have like
a day shat food there that's fucking massive. It's like
five stories. It's the craziest thing you've ever seen in
your entire life. But they have a buffet and the
food was like shockingly good.

Speaker 5 (04:48):
Yeah, but you take shockingly good food and then your
rub a vagina on it, it's probably still not good
for you.

Speaker 4 (04:54):
Well, luckily none of the strippers were, in fact grinding
on the buffet.

Speaker 5 (05:00):
I would assume that they were, and that you're actually mistaken.

Speaker 4 (05:05):
No, no, it's pretty far away and the weird thing.
The reason why we went there was for that buffet,
because like I was with a group of five people.
Four of the five were like, oh my god, we
have to go to this buffet. It's the best. And
I was like, there's not the fuck.

Speaker 5 (05:23):
Yeah, I would make new friends.

Speaker 4 (05:28):
The problem is they were correct. It was good, fantastic.

Speaker 5 (05:32):
I still don't believe you.

Speaker 4 (05:34):
Oh, like I said, I don't know what to tell you.

Speaker 3 (05:38):
eOne wants to see aert little person stripper, which was
cool for about thirty seconds. I'd go see that, yeah, yeah,
And my friend was like, all right, well I'm here.
I'm gonna get a steak. It was like, what, like,
we can leave and go get a steak if you want.

Speaker 5 (05:56):
I don't.

Speaker 3 (05:56):
I don't understand why you're getting one here.

Speaker 4 (05:59):
Here's the thing. I actually find that stranger than the buffet.
Like a strip club having a buffet, I'm like, that
kind of makes sense. A strip club having a full
kitchen where you can get a real dinner, that's weird.
That's so much more work.

Speaker 3 (06:14):
I just don't understand food the strip club at all.

Speaker 5 (06:17):
I don't. I don't trust it at all.

Speaker 3 (06:19):
No, And I'm sure like in theory they're getting checked
by the health inspector and they're probably fine. But I mean,
I just mentally, I just couldnot wrap my head around, like.

Speaker 4 (06:30):
Well, and why would you eat here and listen Tina
gotta eat? What's your what's your problem with Tina showing
you her boobs and having a good lunch like that?

Speaker 3 (06:42):
Tina is your stripper name, not like Crystal or Tiffany.

Speaker 4 (06:47):
Well late, those those are both chlamydia names, So they
defeat they defeat my point.

Speaker 5 (06:58):
Yes, no, I have a sister named Chris.

Speaker 3 (07:00):
Right, Oh no, I didn't.

Speaker 4 (07:02):
That's funny, though I stand by my statements.

Speaker 5 (07:07):
I'll let her know.

Speaker 4 (07:08):
How's it spelled.

Speaker 5 (07:11):
C K?

Speaker 3 (07:13):
It's a okay, yeah, it's with O K. That's the strippers?

Speaker 5 (07:17):
Oh okay, good lord? How the fuck did we end
up here exactly?

Speaker 3 (07:24):
I don't know. Uh, someday, do you think there'll be
cyborg strippers?

Speaker 4 (07:30):
Certainly? I am shocked that that has not already been
developed because of the history of technology.

Speaker 5 (07:39):
Honestly, I'm a little surprised that we don't have that
yet either.

Speaker 3 (07:43):
Huh, Well, we say that here. Maybe if we go
to Japan, that's.

Speaker 5 (07:48):
All right, Yeah, that seems like some japan would do. First.

Speaker 4 (07:51):
Yeah, you'd go there and you'd be like, they'd be
like striper robots. We did that twenty years ago. Now
it's all about blow jops.

Speaker 3 (08:02):
Yeah, I don't know if I'm trusting the cybor for that.

Speaker 4 (08:05):
Also, they have built in underwear vending machines.

Speaker 5 (08:08):
Jesus Christ.

Speaker 4 (08:11):
Would be because if.

Speaker 3 (08:13):
That was the real thing.

Speaker 5 (08:15):
It's like you're getting a lot of dance from a
stripper and then you just put like coins in.

Speaker 4 (08:20):
They're coins the credit card slots.

Speaker 5 (08:23):
You're like this, use your credit card at a strip club.

Speaker 3 (08:26):
Come on, man, this seems like a backwards scenario.

Speaker 4 (08:30):
It tap tap to pay. They've got you locked in
by the time you're in the door.

Speaker 3 (08:36):
Lord, we shouldn't. Let's we should have bought this. Hey,
uh no, you picked cyborg movies that specifically have Malcolm
McDowell and then well movie probably probably he wanted some
sort of vacation. It's true one of them doesn't have

(08:57):
cyborgs in it, but it is futuristic labor. Futuristic labor movie.

Speaker 5 (09:07):
He's a futuristic labor movie. Like that's a sub genre
we're all familiar with future labor.

Speaker 3 (09:14):
Well, I mean, an alien would would fall onto that.

Speaker 4 (09:17):
Labor working in the future.

Speaker 3 (09:21):
Because they wanted to protect their minds, which is why
all right, well let's just get into We're gonna go
in reverse order. Hey, uh, Doug, why do you tell
us about Moon forty four?

Speaker 5 (09:31):
Oh? Fuck? Moon forty four is a early rolling emeric picture.

Speaker 3 (09:38):
Yeah, and there's starring Zeeing Devlin, who would go on
to be one of his main producers after that.

Speaker 5 (09:43):
Yeah. Yeah, who got out of the acting game after
seeing himself on screen in this movie. So let's see.
There's a lot of like scrolling at the beginning to
explain the whole futuristic world we're in, but I don't
think any of it mattered in any way, so I'm
not going to go over that. It's just like, we
want to establish that we're in this dystopian future, but

(10:04):
instead of showing that, we'll just have ten minutes of
writing at the beginning of the movie. So if you
if you do end up watching this movie, don't bother
reading that. You don't need to know any of that.

Speaker 4 (10:15):
Yeah, Also, don't read a description of the movie or
anything else because it's all not correct.

Speaker 5 (10:22):
So I don't So there's prisoners are being used to
protect a mining planet, but somebody's stealing shuttles from the
mining company, so an undercover agent goes in as one.

Speaker 4 (10:34):
Of the prisoners.

Speaker 5 (10:36):
Is that right?

Speaker 4 (10:37):
Is that what happened in this movie? Yes?

Speaker 3 (10:41):
Also to make a simple top gun in the future,
they're all taking tests flying for some reason.

Speaker 4 (10:50):
That's actually pretty accurate.

Speaker 5 (10:52):
As somebody who does not like top Gun, I'm still
offended on its behalf because of that description.

Speaker 4 (10:58):
Well, I it's more okay. That description is better than
any written description I read of this movie because it
focuses on them. So there's a weird robot space race,
which again irrelevant because it just doesn't appear enough in
the movie to be to need an explanation. But there's

(11:19):
evil robots. They've killed a bunch of planets. At the
same time, these shuttles are going missing, which is very
funny because they're more concerned about the missing shuttles than
the fact that people are getting exterminated by robot monsters.
He's sent there with the crew of convicts undercover to

(11:41):
defend this place against the robots, which is again very strange.
If plants are getting wiped out by robots, you don't
really need to be undercover to send somebody there to
be like, hey, people are getting killed by robots.

Speaker 5 (11:54):
No, he's undercover to find out who's stealing the.

Speaker 4 (11:56):
Shuttles, right, Well, yeah, but I'm saying they could. They
didn't even need to send him under cover. They send
him under the guise of protecting them from the robots.

Speaker 3 (12:05):
Isn't he like internal affairs or yeah, he's dirtle affairs.

Speaker 4 (12:10):
That's all. He's a he's a cop cop.

Speaker 5 (12:13):
But did they so did they know that cops were
stealing the shuttles?

Speaker 4 (12:18):
I ma'am.

Speaker 5 (12:20):
Wait, and by cop, we mean whoever was in charge
of that. We're just taking them as to be the
cops because he immediately gets there and his big undercover
move is to pick the loudest, most annoying guy on
the planet and just go, hey, I'm here undercover. Can
you tell me what's been going on? And that guy's like,
I'm pretty sure it's those two guys. And that's the

(12:41):
extent of his investigation from what I could tell, So
it is defense.

Speaker 4 (12:48):
It worked pretty accurate.

Speaker 5 (12:50):
Like yeah, yeah, I don't know if this.

Speaker 4 (12:58):
So, So here's the thing, all that plot stuff that
we just described is so fucking convoluted. And again, if
you read the descriptions, the descriptions are like, you know,
this undercover agent and a group of convicts have to
like protect this base from the onslaught of evil alien creatures.

Speaker 5 (13:19):
Yeah, it makes it sound like a fucking assault on
Presect thirteen.

Speaker 4 (13:23):
Yeah well yeah, yeah, and it makes it sound very
much like an action movie. But really, this movie is
ninety percent about this group of convicts and the group
of navigators who are younger not convicts, like having to
deal with each other, and it ends up being kind
of more character driven, shockingly character driven for the movie

(13:46):
we just described.

Speaker 5 (13:48):
Can I propose that it's really more about us having
to deal with them than it is with them having
to deal with each other? Because my god, everybody in
this movie is just insufferable.

Speaker 4 (14:04):
One hundred percent more rape than I thought was gonna
be in this movie. I could say that, yeah, little
male on male rape.

Speaker 1 (14:11):
Is that this.

Speaker 3 (14:14):
One woman in this it was kind of baffling the
amount of rape.

Speaker 4 (14:20):
Yeah, accurate.

Speaker 5 (14:22):
Yeah, that it feels like the mid nineties, like shash
Ank Redemption and Norm MacDonald accidentally popularized anal rape in movies.
Does that feel fair. Maybe just it was unnecessary. I'll

(14:43):
tell you that I didn't enjoy it.

Speaker 4 (14:45):
Uh yeah, but here the awfulness of it is usually
I don't I don't know what. Here's the thing this
movie is not. I'm not acting like it's an ASTRA
winning movie or anything like that. However, I personally think
this movie is shockingly well made for what it is.

Speaker 3 (15:08):
I will say well made. That doesn't mean ultimately good, though.

Speaker 5 (15:14):
I'll say the visuals are well done.

Speaker 3 (15:18):
Yes, there was parts of this. There is scenes and
visual effects that I was going to say, if you
were to because I had never heard of this movie
before that, if you were to show me certain scenes
out of this movie out of context, it told me
this was like a lost like Ridley Scott movie or

(15:39):
something from like nineteen ninety, I probably would have believed it.
Some of like the miniature work, the space shuttles, some
of the sort of noir lighting for some of it.
Someone definitely watched like Blade Runner and Aliens for this movie. So,

(16:00):
I mean there was stuff. I mean I was when
the movie started first ten minutes, I was like, this
is fantastic. Yeah, the Michael Parre is doing like the
Bounty Hunter type bullshit or whatever. I was like, I
am on board. And then they get to the to
the I don't know training thing and I got really

(16:23):
bored really quick, and then like the last ten minutes
I was like, yeah, this is a kick ass again.

Speaker 5 (16:29):
By the last ten minutes, I was almost asleep. So
I can't really comment too much on it, but yeah,
like the opening visuals, like it's it's obvious miniature work,
but like when you're watching lower budgets stuff from nineteen ninety,
like knowing that its miniatures is not necessarily a criticism.
It still looks great, and you know, like you think

(16:53):
about what else we were getting at that time, and
you're sort of direct to direct to video market, which
is effectively what this is. Because it's a foreign film.
You know, it's a foreign film, but it's done in English,
so they had to have known the goal was to
release it direct to video in North America, right, But
it's yeah, you're watching it, you're like kind of caught

(17:14):
off guard by how good everything looks, and you're like,
holy shit, like maybe this is a hidden gem. And
then they're like, no, no, we only knew how to
do these few shots really really well. That's the way
I look at it.

Speaker 4 (17:30):
I see I once again, I think you guys may
be being unfairly brutal with this film because it's I think.

Speaker 5 (17:38):
I'm going out of my way to be nice really.

Speaker 4 (17:40):
Because I feel it my only my only real complaints
are the the rate, beit which is pretty terrible. But
I again, I also think it's obviously we've talked about
this type of movie before, saying it's done well, feels awful,

(18:00):
but it's it's done effectively and it's relevant.

Speaker 5 (18:05):
Like I will say, I think the rape scene is
all the scenes that are interior scenes with humans in
them and not exterior schine of machines and stuff. I
think the rape scene is maybe the best part of
this movie because it is like the character when he's
breaking down after the results of it and stuff. It

(18:28):
is kind of heart wrenching to watch, which I didn't
want to watch it. I don't think the film earned it,
but that little clip of it is like, okay, all right,
Like you know, they didn't go to graphic they did
show the hugely negative impact of it, and you're like, okay,
I can see what you're doing here. I can understand

(18:49):
how in a good movie, This would be a very
effective moment.

Speaker 4 (18:52):
Yeah. Well, and and again the conceit. So my other
complaint is the conceit to get all the people there is.
It's dumb, like you really don't need any of it.
You don't need the robot aliens coming to attack the planet.
You barely need the the Malcolm McDowell And goddamn it,

(19:17):
what the fuck is the actor's name who plays is
a stoogie guy. God damn it, random receding hairline guy
from every movie who plays a bad guy. The instilling
the shuttles is again not all that relevant to the story,
which is again about this the good people are, you know,

(19:40):
the prisoners versus these young people, and that they need
to learn to like work together to survive essentially while
at the same time being horrible. Okay, yeah, and most
of that stuff again I think is good. I think
there is a problem such as the uh the actor

(20:02):
who plays the drug peddler.

Speaker 3 (20:05):
Kid Steven Jefferies from Fright Night.

Speaker 4 (20:08):
Yes, uh his uh, either his performance or the writing
for that character is so fucking bad. It's the writing
that you can't Yeah, it's it makes it impossible to
get behind him in any way. And you need to
be for a few of the moments in the movie
to be effective.

Speaker 3 (20:30):
It might be the writing and his performance. From having
seen him in multiple things, I feel like he has
kind of one gear and it's evil ed from Fright Night.

Speaker 4 (20:40):
Yeah, that sounds about right.

Speaker 5 (20:42):
Uh.

Speaker 4 (20:43):
Then we've got a few of the prisoners who at
times in the plot need to be Again you need
to like have a reason to give a shit about
that character. But they do the important stuff to the
background characters, which makes them it's irrelevant, Like you can't
do that. You need the person who has the thing

(21:03):
happened to them be important. So what are you doing?
And then the few people in the movie that are
putting in really good performances don't have anything to do
in the movie, which is strange. So there's like this,
it's like a construction problem, like they've got it laid
out all wrong, and the movie could have They didn't

(21:26):
need any other new moving parts to make a good movie.
They just needed to rearrange what they had. Does that
make sense?

Speaker 5 (21:33):
I mean, I understand what you're saying. I don't fully agree.

Speaker 4 (21:36):
With it, sure, sure, but that's whatever to me.

Speaker 5 (21:40):
You needed a script, is what you needed right, Like
I needed characters I could care about. I needed a
script that made more sense. You know, you had the
visuals down. I don't think the acting it's not good.
But it's almost like what happens when you have an
English language film made in a country where English isn't

(22:02):
the predominant language, Like this is what you're going to get,
you know you, I think you shouldn't need a translator
between your director and your main actors. Sometimes sure, and
you get this happens. We see this in old, like
cheesy kind of seventies Italian filmmaking sometime where you're like,

(22:24):
they're speaking in a way that isn't natural because the
person getting them to speak that way doesn't know how
to speak naturally in that language. Does that make sense?

Speaker 3 (22:34):
Yep?

Speaker 5 (22:34):
And I think that comes across and it's across the board.
So I'm not going to blame any of the individual
actors for it. I'm going to say it's a bigger
issue with the production of the film. But the most
important thing is there's so much time spent on dialogue
between characters that I just don't care what they're saying.
I don't care who the characters are, like none of
it feels like why we're here. You know we're here.

(22:58):
If we're doing an investigation into who who's stealing shuttles,
then I need to give a shit what the about
how they're going to find the guys. If we're worried
about these aliens taking over planets, then I need to
give a shit about the fact the aliens are taking
care of plants. And none of that feels relevant. It
feels like filler, filler, filler. Here's a cool shot of
some guys flying around, and you're like, oh, they did

(23:19):
They're doing the miniature thing again, Thank god, that looks
so cool, and filler, filler, filler, rape scene, filler, filler.
Like it's just it's like eighty percent filler is the problem.

Speaker 3 (23:31):
Yeah, I didn't realize we were going to like a
training installation, so I thought once everything started going, I'm like, oh,
so they're going to go up and every time there's
an attack, we'll get a nice action shot of some
you know, flying around and some dog fights in space
and stuff. Yeah, and we never get that. We get
like two practice runs the entire movie before like the

(23:53):
big fight at the end, and otherwise it's just everybody's
conflicts inside the right training facility, which on paper, when
you say that doesn't I mean that can be good.
It just yeah, it doesn't work for this movie.

Speaker 4 (24:08):
Well, and again some of that too, are legitimately good
to film moments that because they did it the way
they did it ruins the possible impact of it. Does
Does that make sense? So the moment of where the
at first you think the plan is for them to

(24:30):
essentially murder one of the convicts by drugging them, but
then it turns out that's not exactly their motivation. They
do poison they ever live and fuck out of one
of them, and then the line something like, you know,
go ahead and fucking beat me up or kill me
or whatever, and it goes because it's all of us,

(24:51):
and we control your food, and we control everything you do,
and you can kill me and someone will kill you.
And then if you them, someone else will kill another
one of you. We will get you all killed, you know, slowly,
but surely we will destroy you, which is a great
movie moment, but it's unearned because they the pois. The

(25:13):
guy they poisoned is a background character that nobody gives
a shit about, and the guy who did the poisoning
is the annoying druggy kid who hasn't earned a moment
in the film to do, you know what I mean,
it's like, it's what are you doing? You have the
the other kid, the the main kid who's the undercover
guy's navigator, who puts in a perfectly fine like performance

(25:38):
as far as those kids, I mean, he legit, there's
a reason why he's in the lead. He's clearly the
best actor out of the group of them. But but
he doesn't fucking they don't use him. Does that make sense?
They keep like sidelining him to have one of the
other people you don't give a fuck about do the thing.
And you're like why.

Speaker 5 (25:57):
Yeah, it's like if they want this to be a
large scale drama film, but they're clearly not capable of
making that. They should have made a sci fi action movie,
like scale back the number of characters, you know, add
more action sequences, reduce the amount of dialogue, you know,
and pick one plot thread and run with it, right.

Speaker 4 (26:21):
Yeah, Like that's.

Speaker 5 (26:24):
Like trying to insert drama when you're incapable of it
ruins a movie. And that's what's happened here. They obviously
got their funding based on the idea, the idea of
this sci fi epic that you can have all these
cool shots in and somebody funded their movie for that,

(26:45):
and then they wanted to do something else with it.
So it's just it's a mess. They didn't know what
they were doing, you know. Like, again, you can make
a good drama film set in a sci fi prison,
there's nothing wrong with doing that, or a sci fi
training facility where prisoners are being forced to train or

(27:06):
whatever this place is. But these guys weren't the guys
to make that movie.

Speaker 3 (27:14):
I think they got the visuals.

Speaker 6 (27:15):
Yeah, again, like gave.

Speaker 3 (27:17):
Him good practice for Independence Day.

Speaker 5 (27:19):
Yeah, And it's you know, rolland Mrick has made a
few decent movies, but his strong suit is the visuals
and the action. And that's true here, and it's true
in his you know what I mean, it's true in
every movie that he's ever had that's been successful. It

(27:42):
just seems like he knows it now and he didn't
know it then. Or maybe they just couldn't get enough
of a budget to do more action sequences. I don't know.

Speaker 4 (27:52):
Well, I mean they even the miniature work is good,
but they do reuse it like they reuse a couple
of the shit and over.

Speaker 5 (28:00):
Yeah yeah, I noticed that too.

Speaker 4 (28:02):
Which is and again, fine, that's a that's a budgetary thing.
I don't know, it's whatever.

Speaker 5 (28:08):
I don't criticize low budget films for taking advantage of
what they have, but I will criticize them for trying
to do things they're not capable of doing and for failing.

Speaker 4 (28:19):
Yeah. Yeah, but besides that movie, I mean, like I said,
there's a there's a few good performances. Uh. Actor who
plays main prisoner guy who I think of as uh
the wrestler edge with the jaw slider in a video

(28:39):
game turned up too high, Brian Thompson.

Speaker 5 (28:42):
Yes, how you got that? Brian? I really don't Jesus
hey accurate.

Speaker 4 (28:50):
Somebody go play a wrestling video game and funck with
that jaw with slider and tell me I'm not correct. Uh,
But yeah, I think he does a fine job.

Speaker 3 (29:02):
Like whatever, Ryan Thompson always does a fine job with
whatever he's asked. He's usually just not asked to do,
considering you play like three different characters on Buffy the
Vampire Slayer during its run. Like, we know he's good,
let's bring him back in. But he's already been on
it twice. Yeah, a different color.

Speaker 4 (29:24):
People want to make him, make him blue. If we
used if we used Jeffrey Combs twenty times, bring jeff
gir Combs in as well. Put him an alien makeup.
That's what every sci fi show is down for the
last thirty five years.

Speaker 3 (29:45):
Does anybody else have anything about this movie? I was
just very disappointed. Unfortunately it starts off I'm really good
and then falls off a cliff For me.

Speaker 4 (29:54):
Yeah, I'm just way less. I'm way less negative on
it than you guys. I'm not gonna tell everybody this
is to make movie. But as far as like low budget,
random movies that you've never heard of before, I have
seen much worse.

Speaker 5 (30:09):
Uh sure, but that's not We don't want to talk
about what the worst thing you've ever watched is. I
would just say this movie commits a cardinal sin of
getting your hopes up and then not delivering, and that's unforgivable.

Speaker 3 (30:27):
All right, Well, Noah, do you want to tell us
about Cyborg three The Recycler.

Speaker 4 (30:34):
Cyborg three the Recycler is the story of a guy
who just wants to make a buck and cut out
some robot eyes being endlessly tortured by evil, evil robot people. Uh, no, way,
that's not right. That's how it's written for some reason.
But the actual plot is a direct sequel to the

(30:57):
prior movie, And by direct sequel, I mean that almost
after the credit scene of two hundred years later, whenever
the guy she's in love with is grown old and
turned dust in front of her, basically after his death
in the future crashes magically become pregnant, and again how

(31:22):
and when, because he died is like a pile of dust.
He was practically a mummy at that point in the movie.
If future technology, maybe they had some way to keep
his seed aflowing.

Speaker 3 (31:37):
I guess she's the technology. She just trapped it.

Speaker 4 (31:41):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, she had a little freezer inside
of her body that held it.

Speaker 3 (31:47):
Whatever.

Speaker 4 (31:49):
Now has to get across the weird now mad Maxian
desert Wasteland to cyber Town, the secret refuge of the
cyborgs that is out in No man's Land, which actually
just turns out to be like one building with a

(32:09):
bunch of people who are all fucked up in it.
While you have one pseudo pervert evil robot guy trying
to hunt her down and get her stuff to sell it,
even though one of the very first things that happens
in the movie is it seems like he pretty much
burns the bridge with the guy who buys his robot bits.

(32:33):
So who's he gonna is gonna sell them robot mits too,
because he you know, our Malcolm McDowell cameo is it
right at the beginning of the movie, in which I'm
ninety percent sure he's playing Claw from Inspector Gadget just
thrown into the wrong movie. Which that's fine. I've got

(32:57):
no complaints about Malcolm mcdowa's for Treyer Claw.

Speaker 3 (33:01):
Bare talked about him in the last movie.

Speaker 4 (33:04):
Uh yeah, but she she teams up with a guy
who supposedly programmed one of the generations of robots and
they have to do a last stand thing where he
quote fingers, repairs all the robots, which I'm not sure
about you guys, but I think he fixes the one
guy's voice, the one guy's arm, and that's it. Guy

(33:29):
with no legs, still got no legs, guy with fucked
up hands. He just glues guns to his hands.

Speaker 5 (33:36):
But I think we're supposed to get the impression that
he made it was an improvement of guns for hands.

Speaker 4 (33:43):
Well, it certainly is. I'm not listen, I'm not complaining
about guy with guns for hands. I'm complaining about one
of the major plot points is it's like, this guy
can fix us, and we have an entire warehouse of
cyborg parts, and he's like, all right, that guy's arm,
that's all we got time for. Okay, let's go.

Speaker 3 (34:01):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (34:01):
I probably would have given that one guy legs if
I were in charge of the decision making.

Speaker 3 (34:04):
But yeah, he said he couldn't.

Speaker 4 (34:06):
Though, right, Yeah, yeah he does. He doesn't specifically call
out that that guy's model is a specific model and
there were no legs from that type of robot.

Speaker 5 (34:18):
I was not listening that closely when that happened.

Speaker 4 (34:21):
See, and then you guys will complain, Oh, it's not
it's not well written. Yes it is. They wrote it in.
You just weren't paying attention because you were bored by
the delightful goodness. Come on, dude with the weird eye
running around pulling out cyborg guys. He's got a necklace
of cyborg guys like he's uh from the the wrong

(34:42):
fucking cyborg movie. You know this movie is he thinks
he's Dolph Lungrin from in from Universal Soldier. For some reason, I.

Speaker 3 (34:52):
Can't believe I have to explain this, but of the
Cyborg franchise starts off if the first one's the mountain
the top, it swiftly goes down hill through the next
two movies, Like the second one wasn't super great either,
but you're like, ah, have a jack ballance, And.

Speaker 5 (35:11):
The second one had some fun in it. This didn't
see Jones, right.

Speaker 3 (35:16):
Sure, why not? And then this one is so boring.
Here's with the dude from Grimlins.

Speaker 5 (35:22):
Here's the thing about this movie is I feel like
they made this movie specifically for like cyborg hads, like
people who are so into the lore of cyborg that
their minds will be blown by the idea of a
cyborg like getting pregnant and stuff.

Speaker 4 (35:39):
And you're like, I don't.

Speaker 5 (35:40):
I just don't think I care at all, Like why
would I? It's Cyborg three? How come nobody's kicking each
other in this? I mean, I get why the one
guy can't kick people, he has no legs, So what
about the rest of you? Like, ah, just oh my god,
And you're like, yeah, it is a neat idea to
have a guy hunting cyborgs.

Speaker 4 (35:59):
And and funny hat, weird eye.

Speaker 5 (36:04):
It's yeah, I don't know. No, No, that hat wasn't funny.
Maybe they were going for funny. I don't know, but
it wasn't funny. The eye was weird, but it didn't
look good.

Speaker 4 (36:16):
Funny funny hat, herd eye.

Speaker 5 (36:21):
The pressed. Doug said, Brian, is what you should be saying.
Because we had to watch this fucking movie.

Speaker 3 (36:28):
It definitely gave me a nostalgic like this is uh,
nineteen nineties sci fi channel direct.

Speaker 5 (36:39):
Yeah, this is why you don't rent the direct to
DVD sci fi sequels. You go to the horror sequels
because those are you know, a slasher sequel you can
just do, whereas this is like they tried to come
up with ideas. And again, like if your mind is blown,
like if you're super into cyborg and you're like, oh
my god, they manged to find a way to have

(37:00):
them be pregnant, and you're like, oh my god, that
guy's hunting them down, you'd be like, oh, yeah, we
gotta know all about that. But I don't think there's
a single human being on the planet who's super into
the cyborg lore. So I don't understand, you know, like
who liked the first and second movie enough that you're
so excited to find out that there are advances in

(37:20):
the cyborg technology that we're unplanned.

Speaker 3 (37:26):
I don't know. No, it may be the only one
to know, because I didn't even know there was a
third one. Are there further Cyborg movies? Unofficially?

Speaker 5 (37:37):
Yeah? Yeah?

Speaker 3 (37:38):
Did Albert Pune make some more of that?

Speaker 4 (37:41):
I mean, like I said yes and no kind of
like but not not exactly, not not in this franchise
if I remember right there. I think there's actually a
fairly recent one's but it's got like nothing to do
with it. You know.

Speaker 3 (37:58):
Albert Pune was hoping to cross over was his Nemesis
franchise with the Cyborg franchise, but he didn't get a
man before he died.

Speaker 5 (38:08):
What in the fucking Charles band was he thinking? Like?
Just stop things? Like when we first we did it
was like a month ago we did Albert Pune movies
and we were talking about him, and I was like
kind of like, I'm like, Okay, I respect this guy
and stuff, and I like the idea that he's building
these franchises and just making movies and fuck everybody else.

(38:29):
And then after watching this one, I'm just like, oh God,
I'm sorry. I thought all those positive things about him.

Speaker 3 (38:35):
Well this wasn't Albert Pune, this was somebody else.

Speaker 5 (38:37):
But was he not involved in this at all?

Speaker 3 (38:40):
Good?

Speaker 5 (38:40):
Good? That makes me feel better.

Speaker 4 (38:42):
Well, because there's also god damn it, what's the name
of that one nights? Is that the name of it?

Speaker 5 (38:49):
I you're talking about?

Speaker 4 (38:50):
Sorry, another Albert Albert Pune movie that's that's Cyborgs, but
it's like dystopian futurey medievally stuff with a cyborg that's
trained to be a cyborg killer that goes out and
kills cyborgs. It's got land Lance Hendricks in it. And

(39:11):
if that makes you more interested, no, yeah, I don't.
And then there's another one that Pune made with Rigor
Hower in it that I can't remember the name of it.

Speaker 5 (39:28):
Yeah, they don't need to know. The movie we're supposed
to be talking about was so boring that we're letting
you go on this tangent. If that's if the listeners
are wondering why we're allowing Noah to go off like this,
trying to drag him back on topic.

Speaker 4 (39:43):
Listen, listen to me audience. They say boring, I say
ridiculous garbage. There's titties. This is a great movie. Everything,
it is very fun. They just they don't know how
to have fun. They're sad and Jada, I've made them
watch more too many of these movies. Look, and now
they have lost the ability to have fun.

Speaker 5 (40:05):
I defended Cyborg too, I think to some extent of
like saying, Okay, it didn't make any sense, but at
least it was kind of fun to watch this one.
I can't say that about and it's sad because it's like,
I don't like it seems like a no brainer. Guys,
chasing Cyborg, you gotta chase her across a wasteland. I

(40:26):
don't know why all three Cyborg movies are directly connected
plot wise, but take place in different universes. That's an
interesting question we could get into if I cared about
these movies. But oh god, like this was just it
was boring. I was like, I I wanted to turn
it off while I was watching it. I'm like, I
should just go to bed. Sleep is more.

Speaker 4 (40:46):
Important than this. So that's so disrespectful to the career
of Kato Caitlin.

Speaker 3 (40:54):
Shit, he was in this movie. Wasn't I completely forget?

Speaker 4 (40:56):
Yeah, I was sorry. This is I'm just laughing to
myself about this movie. Well, you guys complained about it.

Speaker 5 (41:09):
Tell me something you liked about it. Besides, the guy
had a funny hat.

Speaker 4 (41:13):
No, here's the problem. Most of the things I enjoy
about this movie are about the fact that it's garbage.
This is a garbage ask movie. The first time I
saw this movie was like at two o'clock in the
morning on Cinemax. Like I remember it well because I
remember it popping up and saying Cyborg three and I
was like, there's another Cyborg movie.

Speaker 3 (41:35):
It's weird that this would be a late night Cinemax movie.
There's not even that much new toy.

Speaker 4 (41:39):
Well there there was a weirdly a lot of nudity
in exactly one scene, yeah, which is very strange, which
is great. When I was watching it at work, Yeah,
they cramped. Yeah, they crammed, and I was like, oh shit,
and I had to push my phone like turn it
away from from people.

Speaker 5 (41:55):
Just watch.

Speaker 3 (41:56):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (41:56):
Yeah, they cram a lot of a lot of tits
and u cyborg recycler guy being a menacing pervert into
a very short period of time.

Speaker 3 (42:09):
Interesting.

Speaker 4 (42:10):
It was important for them to get all that in.

Speaker 5 (42:12):
Apparently they should have had a plot or an action
sequence or something. I like, it's at the end of
there is like a big fight and it's like all right,
Like it's I don't know, I won't say it's good
or even fine, but it's at least it's at least
stuff's happening, you know what I mean. You're like, oh,

(42:35):
I'm pretty sure those are the good guys and those
are the bad guys, and they seem to be shooting
at each other. I can at least get there, right,
But do more of that in your fucking movie about.

Speaker 4 (42:46):
Sure? Sure? I mean the last the last bit of
this movie where you know, you have a dude running
around with uh what I think modern audiences might recognize
it says like, what did they call it? Edward forty hands?
Was the joke where you duck tape two forty is
your hands. It's that but with machine guns running around

(43:11):
going uh and just shooting guns into the air for
no reason. That's the that's the type of movie we're
existing in, and that is hot garbage. And I appreciate it.
I appreciate it for all of its hot garbage qualities.

Speaker 5 (43:31):
I don't jest, and I don't and I also don't
believe it was intentionally garbage. I think it's like watching
a movie fail isn't interesting to me usually, well.

Speaker 4 (43:43):
Well yeah, and here's the problem. I think I'm the
exact opposite. I enjoy watching a movie where they try
to make a movie and make a garbage ass fucking movie.
If you're intentionally setting out to make a bad movie,
I am not interested in your intentionally bad movie.

Speaker 5 (44:02):
Well, I have a fun idea. I think we should
maybe at some point in this podcast we're, you know,
coming up on four hundred episodes, maybe we should watch
a movie where they tried to make a good movie
and they made a good movie. We should try that
out one of these weeks.

Speaker 4 (44:18):
See but the couple times on this show where you
guys have tried to do that, I end up being
the one being like, this movie sucks.

Speaker 5 (44:30):
Your distaste for quality aside, I think.

Speaker 4 (44:33):
That it's my distaste for boredom. Like again, I don't
understand how you guys could possibly be bored by this
fucking coke fueled.

Speaker 5 (44:44):
It Just no coke makes things fast paced and exciting.
This movie is neither of those things.

Speaker 4 (44:51):
Lots of sitting and talking about stuff now incorrect. You
guys are thinking, I'm telling you that the director was
on cocaine. I'm telling you that somewhere in a room
the writers did a bunch of cocaine. And we're going, hey, hey,
what but so that movie with Edge lead to Joe Lee?
What if? Like what if she was pregnant? Man? Oh dude,

(45:14):
your movie's gonna make a million dollars.

Speaker 5 (45:17):
Okay, first all, I don't think you know how cocaine works.

Speaker 4 (45:19):
And second of all, we know I have done so
much cocaine, and you guys do not know how many long,
long conversations you have about your movie pitches.

Speaker 3 (45:31):
Oh my god, Doug, can you imagine No on cocaine
so much faster?

Speaker 4 (45:37):
I can't.

Speaker 5 (45:37):
I mean, it wouldn't be worse.

Speaker 4 (45:39):
So fuck, Like.

Speaker 5 (45:44):
You think you think Cyborg being pregnant is like you
find that funny in some way? Is that what you're
telling us?

Speaker 3 (45:53):
No?

Speaker 4 (45:54):
No, it's pointless. It's just dumb. It's a dumb thing.
They made a dumb movie, which is great because it's dumb. Fuck.

Speaker 5 (46:03):
I don't know, I don't know how to I don't
know how to explain to you that I want movies
to be like good or interesting or well made in
order for.

Speaker 3 (46:12):
Me, because it's not even fun dumb, it's just no boring.

Speaker 4 (46:16):
It's like.

Speaker 5 (46:18):
Yeah, like, I mean, maybe if you're on cocaine watching it,
it would seem exciting, or if you fast forwarded it,
you just watched it that way. But fuck, I was
so bored watching this movie. I like, it could not
hold my attention. And I'm like, the whole time, I
kept thinking, like, how much would you have to care
about the cyborg franchise to be excited about anything that's

(46:40):
happening on screen. Well, I don't think anybody is.

Speaker 4 (46:48):
Of course they're not listen it's a terrible movie. Why
so good? Because it's a terrible movie. For fox sakes,
The name of this movie is Sie Working three the Recycler.
I don't know what the fuck you want to not
watch it?

Speaker 5 (47:07):
That's exactly what I want is to not watch it.

Speaker 4 (47:11):
You're right, I apologize. This is clearly my fault for
not picking more pun movies. I love add more.

Speaker 5 (47:19):
No stop adding shit to the list, or I'm gonna
just start deleting things you put on there.

Speaker 3 (47:23):
I would actually watch more Pune movies.

Speaker 4 (47:27):
What about one about medieval Nights with Simlers.

Speaker 5 (47:30):
I think we need to renegotiate our in terms of
agreement here for the podcast where Noah shouldn't be allowed
to pick movies anymore. If this is what he's gonna do,
it's hurtful.

Speaker 3 (47:44):
Sometimes they work, no, sometimes they don't listen.

Speaker 4 (47:47):
I know, I know what it's like. But at the
same time, now people will understand my song work three,
the recycling references.

Speaker 5 (47:58):
I will be blocking this movie out as quickly as possible,
just so we're clear.

Speaker 4 (48:04):
Now, I feel like I feel like I want to
go as the recycler for Halloween this year.

Speaker 3 (48:09):
Just oh, you totally can't.

Speaker 4 (48:11):
Like, just to irritate you two, because YouTube would be
the only two. You'd be like, what is he? He's
like a steampunk guy. He's just got a weird eye
and a hat.

Speaker 5 (48:23):
There is no way by Halloween I will know what
you're dressed up as. There's no way you send me
a picture of you in that costume by in October
of this year and I will not know what it is.

Speaker 3 (48:34):
I'll be like whatever.

Speaker 5 (48:35):
I'll probably just not reply to the discord comment or.

Speaker 4 (48:39):
Just it's just me funny hat, weird eye wearing a
T shirt that' says sleebird three that recycler.

Speaker 5 (48:47):
It's not that funny a hat. Let's have a convention
story about somebody from this movie. All right, maybe that'll
be interesting. I mean, it's not gonna be more boring
in the movie, so go ahead.

Speaker 3 (49:02):
Well, so Andrew Bernarski's in this movie. He's the big
dude who turns on the recycler at one point.

Speaker 5 (49:09):
Yeah, okur.

Speaker 3 (49:13):
Well I got two. One. He was at a convention.
We're around weekend, and it was Sunday, and he was
fixing to leave ahead to the airport, and we saw
him get up from his table pack all of his
shit up and then he quickly signs like ten eight
by tens and just throws them on his table and

(49:33):
walks away, just like yeah for all my fans. And
he gets a chance to see me just in case
someone has sign all these. And then I think later
as they were cleaning update just the room in the garbage.

Speaker 4 (49:45):
Uh So here's the thing. I understand that you're big
judgmental that he thought that people were coming for those
at the same time. If a dude he was leaping
a conventionally, and he was nice enough to just sign
some things and leave them on the table for people
who might have been coming to see him and didn't
get to That's a very positive, nice thing. That sounds

(50:07):
like a wonderful person.

Speaker 5 (50:08):
That does seem like a nice gesture.

Speaker 3 (50:10):
I think normally I would say yes, But Andrew Bernarski
is a terrible person in real life, so I don't
think that's what it was. He apparently was found, uh,
got arrested for animal cruelty because he kept like tons
of puppies and cages in his trailer for whatever reason.

Speaker 5 (50:32):
If you don't even know the reason, then you're obviously
jumping to conclusions. Maybe there was a really good reason.

Speaker 4 (50:37):
I was getting ready to say that to me, that
sounds less like a horrible monster animal cruelty like who
is the fucking football player, uh, Michael Vick, and more
and more like well, and I was gonna say, more
like mentally ill woman who has way too many fucking cats.

Speaker 5 (50:58):
Sure, yeah, cruelty through neglect is still cruelty.

Speaker 4 (51:02):
But yeah, well, but it's a different level of I
don't hate that woman. I want her to get help,
and I want those cats to be okay. Sure.

Speaker 3 (51:12):
By the way, Andrew Bernarski played Leatherface in the Texas
Chainsaw remake. Just if people need a link to place
like who this guy is. So he's a big dude.
And at the very first horror convention I went to
as a podcaster, me and my co host Tim at
the time were sitting with another podcast at the bar
drinking afterwards, and you know, after some drinks, for some reason,

(51:37):
me and a guy from the other podcast thought it
would be hilarious if we just went up to random
celebrities in the bar and try to interview them about
random shit that didn't matter. And even now I have
no idea why we thought that would be funny, but sure, whatever.
And Andrew Bernarski was up at the bar ordering something

(51:58):
and we were like, we should go up and talk
to him about that football movie the program that he
was in, because he was like the big dude with
like the skull painted on his face or whatever.

Speaker 5 (52:08):
It's like, we should have a really successful movie he
was in. He probably gets asked about it a lot.

Speaker 3 (52:13):
To be honest, I was like, yeah, but we're at
a horror convention, so I'm like, we should just go
up and ask nothing but program questions, and the other
guy's like, yeah, but we should. We should pronounce it
program the program. Could you tell me about the program?

Speaker 4 (52:28):
I don't know why, but that actually is kind of funny.

Speaker 5 (52:30):
Yeah, I find that out. I see that its funny.

Speaker 3 (52:33):
So we went up and he was gonna interview him,
and I had the camera and he had like the
microphone and stuff, and he's like, hey, we wanted to
see if we could talk to you about the program.
And Andrew Bernarski is like, not, well, I'm at the bar.

Speaker 2 (52:47):
Man.

Speaker 3 (52:48):
He started to get kind of pissed and started to
get angry, and so then I retreated, and you know,
the other dude eventually came back, and Andrew Bernarski was
like really mad, and I'm just like, oh shit. And
so I'm sitting there and I told this dude, I'm like, look,
if we ever watched this footage together, I'm just gonna
tell you what it's going to look like. Because we

(53:09):
went up and then he started getting mad. In the
instant he started getting mad on the camera. You'll notice
I start backing away pretty swiftly. So if you were
going to get punched, like you were going to be
on your own just let you know. Well.

Speaker 5 (53:25):
So my story about that guy is that I saw
him at the bar once at a after a convention,
and I didn't say anything annoying and when he walked by,
he just high five me and it hurt, like fuck
so huge.

Speaker 4 (53:40):
Because of his powerful forearms.

Speaker 5 (53:43):
Yeah, like, so I would not want him to punch. Really,
he was being nice to me.

Speaker 4 (53:47):
So I do like the fact that we have two stories.
One is about a young person unintentionally being a super
big dick to a celebrity, yes, and into the other
one is of a celebrity trying to be nice and
high fiving you and nearly destroying your body so much more.

Speaker 5 (54:08):
Really, I was just standing there with a group of
people and they're laughing at me, and they're like, did
you just get hurt from my high five? And like
did you just see that?

Speaker 4 (54:13):
Mother is a strong.

Speaker 3 (54:20):
So third story, which may be the most delightful story
of the bunch. Uh at another convention, another time we
were there and uh, Noel know who I'm talking about.
Randy was there with us and he had his uncle
Randy shirt on, which is just a giant picture of
his face. And my friend Randy is a big dude

(54:41):
and then has a really long like zz top almost
I mean not quite that long, but just like a
pretty long beard. And so the picture on his shirt
is just a cutout of his face, full face beard,
all of it, just to give you a visual. And
then we were all outside drinking and there's Andrew Bernardski
out there drinking too, and he was going around asking everybody, Hey,

(55:03):
you gott beer? He got beer, and so we gave him,
like we had like two cores lights and we gave him.
It's like, yeah, here, man, take it. And he looked
at Randy's shirt, saw Randy's picture, looked up at him
in the face, looked back down to his shirt, at
his like there's no like confusing, like what's going on?

(55:23):
And then Andrew Bernarski points at his shirt and goes,
I love John Candy and then just walks away.

Speaker 4 (55:31):
See. I personally think that that was an intentional joke,
and that is very funny.

Speaker 5 (55:40):
We know these stories about this actor who was not
a major part in the movie. Is the only thing
that's interesting about this podcast because I didn't see him
once the same convention where he I fived me, I
watched a little kid walk up to him to get
a copy of Texas Chainsaw signed. But it was the
seventy four film, and the guy was like you just

(56:01):
see the awkwardness on his face of like I don't
know what to do here. He's like, you, guys, you
know I'm not in this one, right. It was really
funny because it was like a small child who clearly
had just made some kind of mistake, and it was like,
it was very funny.

Speaker 3 (56:15):
That's funny.

Speaker 4 (56:18):
See, very different sense of humor than me, because I
one would have signed it, not charged the kid, and
my signature would have said I'm not in this movie
and then it was signed.

Speaker 5 (56:28):
It would have been very funny.

Speaker 4 (56:29):
Yeah, or just and then and then he has a keepsake,
a lovely keepsake forever.

Speaker 3 (56:35):
Yeah, or just signed it. I'm happy to be here.
Gunner Handsome is a Gunner Handsome dead.

Speaker 5 (56:44):
This would have been like maybe two thousand and four
or something, so it's all but I don't even know
if they were charging for autographs that far back.

Speaker 4 (56:54):
You guys remember, back whenever horror conventions were super cool
and chill, and they did like fucking drag you over
the coals.

Speaker 3 (57:03):
For fucking Walking Dead ruined it for everybody.

Speaker 5 (57:07):
Yeah, it's the downside to geek culture taking over the mainstream.
That's why I stopped going to them.

Speaker 3 (57:16):
Yeah, I just started up again recently, and you know,
I'm going this weekend to one and it's gonna have fun,
but Jesus Christ, it's gonna be an expensive weekend. So
I don't really get signatures anymore. But there's like three things.
There's like three people have to because I have a
Namornal three four poster from that era when I was

(57:37):
going pretty hardcore. Two of the people there I don't
have signature nic and I'm like, well, I should get
it to try to complete that. And then I have
my Friday thirteenth hockey mask that's signed by Jason's Ken
Kersinger's gonna be there, and he's one of like two
people I don't have.

Speaker 5 (57:56):
Yeah, I guess.

Speaker 3 (57:57):
So it's like I gotta get those just to kind
of wrap these autograph things up. But you know, the
low ball price for an autograph now is about fifty bucks.
So yeah, yeah, I.

Speaker 4 (58:12):
Kind of was never on the autograph train. It's just
not a thing I ever was interested in all that much.
I like whenever I went to the conventions, it's always
just finding like memorabilia or maybe well, back in the day,
it used to be finding like bootlegs and stuff of

(58:32):
the random fucking movies that were impossible to find, but
that's not really an issue as much anymore. So Now
it might be something like hitting a Vinegar Syndrome booth
and getting some cool random thing. But that and it
used to be you just like whatever, bump into Tony
Todd in the lobby and talk to Tony Todd for

(58:52):
five minutes and just be like, I fucking loved your
movies are so cool, and then they would be very
nice and you'd go, yeah, that was great talking to
that person for two minutes. Yeah.

Speaker 3 (59:04):
Well, it used to be like, go up, you get
something signed, you take a picture with them, Well experience.
You could probably get out of there for about twenty bucks,
which is worth it. And you know, I don't like
individual signatures. I'm not super into it, even though I
did get down costco Elly last year. But like, if
I can get like a group, like something interesting signed,

(59:26):
like I have a whole name on ELM Stream three
poster signed and stuff by a bunch of the cast,
and like my hockey mask with all the Jason's and
stuff on it. Yeah, like just going up to somebody's
table and buying an eight by ten. I'm like, yeah,
not interesting.

Speaker 5 (59:41):
You keep coming up with excuses. This is starting to
sound like how you didn't want to collect popcorn buckets
and now you have every single one ever produced. I
have two.

Speaker 3 (59:49):
I have two, Doug two for now.

Speaker 5 (59:52):
I don't know, lord.

Speaker 4 (59:54):
I do have a thing where I end up with
random uh autographs and sign shit because there will be
somebody who's booth is like so unpopular, and I'm like, oh,
I feel bad that nobody's going up there. It's so
I gotta go. Like my copy my copy of Land
of the Dead that I have signed by the actor

(01:00:16):
who played uh, what's the zombies name Big Daddy. That
was supposed because it was the last day of the
convention and he clearly hadn't done very well, and he
was like, hey, man, i'll you know whatever this And
I'm like, I'm fairy not to spend a lot of money.

Speaker 5 (01:00:34):
Man.

Speaker 4 (01:00:34):
He goes, hey, listen, fifty bucks, I'll give you this
Blu Ray, this Blu Ray, this Blue Ray. I'll sign everything.
Take a picture, and I was like, all right, I
can't like, okay, I can't say no to all that.
You're clearly like it'd be rude of me at this
point to be like, nah, fuck you.

Speaker 5 (01:00:52):
I remember one time I was with my buddy and
he was there was a show called like Red Versus
Blue or something that I watch, and so like my
buddy up, like they had like a booth at the
convention and he was just buying copies of the show
and the guy selling it to him was one of
the guys that worked on the show. I forget what
role he was, but he's like, yeah, man, open that up.
I'll just sign it for you, and my buddy goes no,

(01:01:13):
and he goes, I won't. I don't charge anything, man,
I'll just sign it, seem And I still remember and
so like and everybody just goes, no, that's fine, and
I was and I literally looked at my shoes. Let
him sign it. I'm like, let him sign it, like
this is mean. I just couldn't erase it later if
you want, Like what the fuck? Like just he obviously
wants the attention.

Speaker 4 (01:01:34):
I'm gonna kill this guy, and then me and Church
are gonna be best Friends. I don't think that's the
way that works. Kabooz bes Friends.

Speaker 5 (01:01:46):
Is that a reference to the show what's going on there?

Speaker 4 (01:01:49):
I listened Red Versus Blue was very fucking especially the
first couple of seasons of it.

Speaker 5 (01:01:54):
Was very funny. I'm not not saying it wasn't I'm
saying I literally never saw anything up except my friend
buying the DVDs.

Speaker 3 (01:02:04):
It's kind of funny. There were There was a couple
of years where we went to like Horror Hound and stuff,
and Norman Regis would be there and his poster behind
him was like Boondock Saints and Blade two, and there
would be nobody at his table and he looked bored
as fuck. Now that dude has his own special room

(01:02:28):
where he signs can't get out of there for less
than probably one hundred and fifty bucks.

Speaker 4 (01:02:32):
Which which again is kind of crazy, right, because, don't
get me wrong, whatever The Walking Dead, especially the first
couple of seasons, were so good, and they were a
cultural touchstone and a phenomenon. Whatever. Boondock Saints is like
a fucking movie, right, It's It's not like it is
a calling it a cult classic. I feel like it's
being disingenuous. It is like a fucking classic.

Speaker 3 (01:02:55):
Ass Actually, no, I'd go with cult classic, probably because
it did horribly and barely even made a peep in theaters.
It wasn't until video that it really caught on. Sure, Sure,
but I mean that's because the director, writer director was
a giant asshole.

Speaker 4 (01:03:12):
Sure but well, and it's one of those things. But
a lot of movies did that. But I mean it's
a like you say, Boondock Saints. People know the fucking
movie now, like it arguably is mainstream. I don't know
of a single person who I've ever mentioned that movie too,
and they were like, cap, never seen that movie? You know,
well I do know people that haven't seen Jaws. Sure.

Speaker 3 (01:03:37):
Yeah. I just say Walking Dead ruined it because it
brought in a lot of people who didn't watch horror
movies or go to these conventions or anything. Because it
was so popular. All these women would show up, all
these soccer moms would show up because they love Darryl Dixon,
and so then, of course, with all these giant crowds coming,

(01:03:57):
everybody boost their prices up from the Walking Dead, which
then means, like you know, Tony Todd is like, well,
I gotta compete, so I gotta bumb my prices up
so I make money too, And so then suddenly everything
is like super expensive now, and now you can't get
a picture with Norman Rita's at his table unless you
pay another fifty bucks. So now everybody else starts doing that.

(01:04:20):
It just kind of ruined the whole thing. That sucks.
So basically, I'm saying it's Norman Reada's fault.

Speaker 4 (01:04:29):
A bit being the most popular person on the show,
even though his character was irrelevant in the comic books.
Fucking they had to add him after the fact.

Speaker 3 (01:04:43):
I've heard good stories about it now that he has
like taken later flights so you can finish signing for
people in his lines and stuff. So no real shade
to Norman Readers. It's just that phenomenon kind of jacked
up the congoing experience for people who were going to
before The Walking Dead.

Speaker 4 (01:05:02):
Yeah, I do feel like part of the part of
the weirdness of it is that the celebrities at the
conventions also shifted, so that a lot of this, you know,
it used to be the celebrities at a horror convention
where the celebrities who needed money and quit being the

(01:05:25):
case where it just became another revenue stream.

Speaker 5 (01:05:28):
It became corporatized to where it's like, you know, like
you could see three or four people there from the
same show and you're like, obviously the producers arranged to
have these people arrive together, you know what I mean,
And it's like it stopped being it's not being that
like kind of genuine like, oh, this person's just here
and they've got their pictures and you're gonna walk up
and you're gonna get to talk to them, and it

(01:05:49):
became part of their job and it's.

Speaker 4 (01:05:54):
Yeah, well, yeah, there used to be the random thing too.
I don't know if you guys ever had this exps
where you know, there would be some B movie actor
there and you'd bump into him and you'd be like,
oh shit, I didn't even know you were here. Where's
were booths at? And they're like, I don't know booth.
You'd be like what They're like, I was here, just here.

Speaker 5 (01:06:14):
To be here. So I went and saw like some
like D level movie once and it was like it
was a real low budget and you know whatever, kind
of liked it. So I went out to like just
one of the boosts that was selling movies to like
try to buy it, and the director was there just shopping. Well,
I was shopping for his movie, and I'm like, that's fun.
Like I just saw A Q and A with you,

(01:06:35):
and you just, you know, you're so unwell known that
you could just come out here and shop with the
rest of us.

Speaker 3 (01:06:41):
Oh yeah, uh when we're uh, we'd be at the
at the bootleg table and Wes was looking for something
and fucking Jane Muse would just start asking him, Hey, man,
is this thing cool? I don't know, man, I haven't
seen it.

Speaker 7 (01:06:58):
Nice for calling the Midnight drive No one is here
to take your call. For more info, check out the
Midnight drive In on Twitter at emn drive in pod
or find us on Facebook. If you want to email us,
send it to the Midnight Drive In at gmail dot com.
Remember no outside food and drink. Anyone co performing sexual

(01:07:19):
acts at the drive in will immediately be taken to
the office. Unspeakable things will be done to you. Thanks
for calling.

Speaker 4 (01:07:29):
Uh, I didn't I go to the theater? What's on
the theaters right now?

Speaker 6 (01:07:34):
Oh?

Speaker 4 (01:07:34):
I went and saw Fantastic four, that's right, Yeah, you know,
the biggest, the biggest movie of the year. That one.
That's that's what I went to see. Uh and it
was pretty good. I well, no, I don't. Here's the thing.
I wish I was more excited about it, because I
don't have any complaints about it. Does that make sense?

(01:07:57):
It was it was fine, Like it was. It was
better than what Marvel's been doing. It was its own thing.
It didn't push heavily on like setting up one hundred
other movies. It just kind of existed and was a
fantastic for a movie. And I think if it had

(01:08:17):
come out ten years ago, I would be losing my
mind over it.

Speaker 3 (01:08:24):
But you've seen too much that's ruined it all for you.

Speaker 4 (01:08:28):
No think I think it very much. As you know,
people always say don't let the bad ones or in
the good ones or whatever, but I think they have.
I think Marvel has devalued itself in a way now
that it's it's making things that otherwise are good suffer
because I'm just less excited. Does that make sense. It's
hard to explain. But like, like Galactus was cool looking,

(01:08:52):
and like all that was good. They did everything they
should have done. In a Fantastic four movie script where
it's a story about a family trying to be a
family and b super heroes and just deal with stuff.
They didn't waste a ton of time on origins like
it's it's overall, it's like I said, it's a it's

(01:09:15):
a good movie. I just wish I could be more
amped up about it.

Speaker 5 (01:09:19):
I'm more amped up about it. Does that make you
feel better?

Speaker 4 (01:09:21):
Sure?

Speaker 3 (01:09:22):
I thought the Galactus was fantastic. I mean, what they've
been trying to do since they started making Fantastic Four
movies and finally just did it.

Speaker 5 (01:09:33):
Yeah, I thought for me, the more important thing than
Galactus was the family. Dynamics really worked well. I love
the interactions between Ben and Johnny. I thought they because
I didn't hate the old Fantastic Four stuff, but this
way they really got it where it was like almost
like brothers, like picking at each other, but there was

(01:09:55):
a love there, if that makes sense, and so it
made it friendly and fun to watch them kind of
picking on each other the whole movie. They weren't they
never never seemed really to not get along, which I
thought they got really well in this movie. I was
a little worried because I went in very blind. So

(01:10:16):
when all of a sudden, Sue was pregnant. I'm like, oh,
I don't know if I'm gonna want to watch a
baby storyline. But I thought it worked pretty well.

Speaker 4 (01:10:23):
It wasn't didn't. It feels a little weird and unearned
to go straight to Franklin, which is it wasn't like,
it wasn't bad. I'm not against not complaining. It just
felt weird to jump They.

Speaker 5 (01:10:43):
Wanted to jump right into a an existing world and
avoid this being an introduction to the characters. They were
assuming an audience is going to know enough about these
characters too to enjoy the film, and so you got
to give them something to do plot wise, personality wise,
and by giving them that character, the new baby, that

(01:11:04):
gave them a way to move forward in a way
for us to get to know the characters without retelling
the origin. So I didn't mind it.

Speaker 2 (01:11:11):
I was.

Speaker 4 (01:11:12):
I was a little sad with the ending because I
think they had an opportunity for a much better ending
than they went for.

Speaker 5 (01:11:22):
But I thought it was a real missed opportunity to
not have the post credit sequence being Franklin literally taking
his first step, since that's the name of the movie.
I was really hoping for that.

Speaker 4 (01:11:36):
Yeah, I kind of spoiler alert, so skip away ahead.
I Legit at the end whenever Sue is looking like
she might die, and you know, of course, the way
it's gonna work is that Franklin's going to use his
magic Franklin powers to save his mommy. I for a

(01:11:57):
split second was like, oh, if they just fucking killer
just immediately, how intense could that be to set up
future movies, Because you know, they did do a good
job of establishing the fact that Read tries to be
a good person. What isn't necessarily a good person?

Speaker 5 (01:12:19):
Well, okay, I don't agree with that assessment. I think
he is too analytical and doesn't have enough emotion, and
she maybe is the opposite, so they kind of balance
each other out, would be the way to say it.

Speaker 4 (01:12:32):
Sure, I mean, but in the comic books like Read,
Legit does fucked up stuff like it happens over and
over and over again.

Speaker 5 (01:12:39):
We're talking about the movie right now, so.

Speaker 4 (01:12:41):
Sure, sure, but I'm talking about if you're setting up
those characters, they had an opportunity to wound Read and
take away part of his moral compass immediately in an
effective emotional way in the film, like if she had
actually died after saving everybody. That's a pretty good like

(01:13:02):
you know what I mean, it's it's fucked to Fridge
an important female character like that, But it's also a
great ending to the movie.

Speaker 5 (01:13:13):
I I'm not sure it would have worked tonally for
the movie that we were watching.

Speaker 4 (01:13:17):
Sure, because the movie was silly, but we need But
what I'm saying is it adds It adds a level
of stakes that is otherwise absent ye, which again is
one of the complaints about Marvel movies that they just
consistently have not had the balls to just fucking cut
something off and be like, no, you know what I mean,
the bad thing happened. Sorry, yeah, I mean that's yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:13:42):
This is such a standalone movie that I don't compare
it to all that other Marvel stuff. To be honest,
I view this as a its own, completely thing. It's
set in a different universe. I like the idea of
just having movies set in different universes and you just
flash the universe number up on screen at the beginning.
Sure like that, because this was set in eight to

(01:14:02):
eight And I'm just like, yeah, that's good enough, Like
just this is just then No, I don't I don't
know anything about the comics.

Speaker 3 (01:14:12):
When it comes to Fantastic No, no, I know this
is more of a tribute to Jack Kirby.

Speaker 5 (01:14:17):
Okay, yeah, I did. At the end, they kind of
pointed that out.

Speaker 3 (01:14:19):
Yeah, they kind of point that out that eight August
twenty eighth is Jack Kirby's birthday. But I didn't know,
which I thought was fun, it was a fun thing
for comic fans. And then they do kind of point
it out, they kind of, you know, have an arrow
at the.

Speaker 5 (01:14:34):
End, like I didn't know if that was a coincidence
or if they like if eight to eight was something
from the comics that may like that's just that's the
one where Herbie exists kind of thing, like I don't know,
so just for Jack Kirby, Okay, fair enough.

Speaker 4 (01:14:50):
Yeah, And then I think my other my, maybe my
other complaint in which this is a personal complaint, not
a movie complaint A thousand percent more Ben like, because
let's be honest, Like Reid is an interesting character, They're
all interesting characters. Ben Gram's the best character in Fantastic four,
hands down, Like ever, it's just the best. He is

(01:15:12):
the likable one. He has the most interesting character motivations
and difficulties and all that kind of stuff, and I
feel like maybe they didn't lean into that enough.

Speaker 3 (01:15:23):
I've heard they filmed a lot more stuff all together,
but a lot more Ben Graham stuff.

Speaker 4 (01:15:28):
I was gonna say, didn't it feel little short? Like
I appreciate the fact that they're trying to get away
from the three hour movies, But the directors.

Speaker 3 (01:15:39):
Said they filmed a lot more stuff that they ended
up cutting it down just to keep the movie flowing,
whole villains and stuff like it's more of him and
Natasha Leone. I think they had some more stuff together.

Speaker 4 (01:15:52):
Yeah, I felt that felt really weird. The scenes that
they had felt weird because they didn't do anything with it.

Speaker 3 (01:16:00):
And uh yeah, there's a whole subplot with John Malkovich
that was cut out of the movie.

Speaker 4 (01:16:05):
The fuck, What the fuck did John Malkovich play?

Speaker 5 (01:16:08):
You played ghost? He's got name dropped in the movie.
But they there was something going on. I don't I
don't understand because the way they put it in is
that they defeated him previously, so it's I don't know
if that was like an introductory thing where that was
like their opening battle and that's how we get to
know the characters, because they do that a lot in
action movies.

Speaker 4 (01:16:26):
Oh man, that that upsets me so much. I didn't
get John Malkovich being a ridiculous villain who has an
army of super monkeys.

Speaker 5 (01:16:36):
Yes not monkeys.

Speaker 1 (01:16:42):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:16:42):
I mean, I don't want the movie to be longer,
but I do think it felt a little rushed. So
it's almost like they needed to break it out into
two movies.

Speaker 4 (01:16:53):
Well, it's especially for the fact that and again, I
know people like that actor, the dude from uh uh
Cobra Kai who played Moullman.

Speaker 3 (01:17:01):
Yeah, Paul Walter Hauser, who's awesome.

Speaker 4 (01:17:04):
Yeah. Yeah, once again, I like the guy too, But
they left in all that Mollman stuff, which did not
serve much for the movie service.

Speaker 5 (01:17:18):
You needed Moleman at the end plot wise, you needed
to have him be a character so that when they
call him and have them take all the people underground
to protect him.

Speaker 2 (01:17:28):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:17:29):
See, I feel like the opposite. I feel like the
only reason why they took people underground to protect them
was for a reason to have that Moman conversation. No,
it feels like the exact opposite.

Speaker 3 (01:17:40):
I was going to point out that it seems kind
of funny that superhero movies now all because of fucking
Man of Steel, now have to point out all this
shit where it's like, well, city's evacuating. We're evacuating the city,
right like they did it the last Superman.

Speaker 5 (01:17:55):
They did it in this and they, well, you.

Speaker 3 (01:17:58):
Can't get the Man of Steel complaints, so we have
to put in a scene where people evacuate.

Speaker 5 (01:18:02):
It's it's it's the how do you get rid of
the cell phones that we have in horror movies and
superhero movies? How do we eard of all the people
so we can have a big fight without them dying? Yeah, yeah,
we could kind of have a moratorium on that we
don't like, we get it.

Speaker 4 (01:18:17):
Yeah, yeah, And again, no complaints about him being in
the movie, No complaints like Moleman like deserves to be
in Marvel movies. I get. I get that it's a
stupid ridiculous character, but it's also like a big comic
book thing, and it has been for a very long time,
so pretending that those silly characters don't exist irritates me.

Speaker 5 (01:18:39):
And I think he was funny, and I think like again,
they they had they had him there for a plot reason.
It wasn't just a filler scene.

Speaker 3 (01:18:50):
So apparently there was a They put out a prequel
comic book and he was like the villain in it,
and don't a lot more of them dealing with him
and Sue's sort of interaction with him, which is why
she was sort of able to talk to him and
call upon him to have him help them or something.

Speaker 4 (01:19:13):
Yeah, so I thought that was kind of Yeah, I
thought it was. It was a little The shallow ball
sub story felt a little odd and rushed again because
whatever they had the whole thing with Johnny dissecting the
language so that he could communicate with her and you

(01:19:34):
know what I mean, and all that kind of stuff,
but it doesn't feel like she he upsets her, she
flies off and then just shows up at the end
and knocks knocks galactic see the portal, And you're like
that felt that felt uh unearned on like a deuce
X almost level, like where you're like, come on.

Speaker 5 (01:19:55):
Nah, I don't know if I agree with that. I
think it's a little rushed. I agree with yeah, but
it is. There is the whole plot line or the
story of the backstory too. She has sacrificed herself once
before to save a planet. Right, Sure, we're doing it again.

Speaker 4 (01:20:12):
Which he gets, which he gets to by magically learning
an entire language from two words.

Speaker 5 (01:20:19):
No, that is how you learn languages. But I do
like it would have made if you had more time,
it would have made sense to have Johnny working with
actual linguists to decipher that language, not doing it all himself.
I agree, like, again, rushed a little bit is a
fair criticism.

Speaker 4 (01:20:36):
Yeah, which and again not terrible. I liked the special effects.
I I don't know, I kind of I liked what
they did with Johnny's character where they made him less
of an idiot, because because I do feel like sometimes
in the last movie attempts that was like unjustifiably so

(01:20:58):
where they're like, yeah, he's the idiot that can set
on fire, and it's like, no, he's not. Like there's
the jokes about him being a quote fingers hothead and stuff,
but they.

Speaker 3 (01:21:09):
Always kind of forget that he is part of the
group because he is also a scientist.

Speaker 4 (01:21:13):
Yeah, yeah, he is a scientist. He is smart. And
then there is the whole thing in the comic books
of he maybe does not have the best restraint whenever
it comes to his interest in women, which has happened
multiple times in the comics, which is kind of funny.
Not necessarily that like he's a stalker or anything, but

(01:21:34):
just that he meets some girl that he finds attractive
and everybody's like, uh, that's a very bad idea, and
he's like, yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:21:41):
But she's hot. Well, and that's kind of implied in
this movie as well, right.

Speaker 4 (01:21:45):
Yeah, yeah, exactly, That's what I'm saying. That was actually
like true to the comic character and set up maybe
future issues with you know, him getting involved with like
Crystal and things like that.

Speaker 5 (01:21:56):
Yeah, I know, I thought, I agree that his character
was much better done here. It's it's it's a real
issue in some of those early Fantastic Four movies of
like why would a person this stupid be allowed in space?
Like you know what I mean, It's like the only
reason he was ever allowed to go was to you know,
because he was related, And here it does feel like, okay, yeah,

(01:22:19):
he's also one of the team. He's also you know, worthwhile.

Speaker 3 (01:22:24):
So I do want to point out that Paul Walterhauser
also wore his progress Proteus World Championship belt on the
red carpet. That's pretty fine, who's that sorry Moldman. He's
he's into indie wrestling. He wrestles, he does, and he's

(01:22:46):
the world He's the Proteus Champion of Progress Wrestling Federation.

Speaker 4 (01:22:55):
Like I said, I have no complaints with him being
in the movie or being Moullman. I just feel like
I wish we either needed to spend more time focused
on Moleman to earn that moment at the end, or
we didn't need it at all, If that that's all
I'm saying. I feel once again, I feel like they
in order to get all the things in that they

(01:23:15):
wanted to get in, they moved them too quickly and
didn't I.

Speaker 5 (01:23:20):
Mean, that's a that's a complaint about movies in general
these days, which I you know, I had that complaint
with Superman. I had that complaint with almost everything that's
come out recently. Certainly Captain America had that issue. But
this movie was so fun that I didn't really have
a problem with it because I'm like, yeah, but also

(01:23:40):
look at the little robot running around in the background.

Speaker 3 (01:23:42):
So Herbie.

Speaker 5 (01:23:44):
I really enjoyed Herbie. I was surprised I enjoyed Herbie.

Speaker 4 (01:23:49):
Yeah. Now, Herbie comes from Doug, the aesthetics were really cool.
I liked the the retro futurists stuff that they did.

Speaker 3 (01:24:00):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:24:00):
Yeah, I actually I think a big part of the
success of this movie is that it feels original simply
because it is set in its own universe, that we're
getting to know the universe as much as we're getting
to know the characters.

Speaker 3 (01:24:15):
Yeah. Do you know where Herbie comes from, Doug?

Speaker 5 (01:24:18):
I assume the comics or one of the cartoons.

Speaker 3 (01:24:22):
Cartoon. I've heard two stories, and now maybe you know
what is specifically the reason, but was in the seventies
cartoon I've heard either the network didn't want human Torch
because they're afraid kids were going to set themselves on fire.
And I've also heard there was some weird copyright thing

(01:24:43):
with the character since there was a human Torch before
the Fantastic Four. But either way, they couldn't use the
human Torch, so they came up with Herbie, this robot.

Speaker 4 (01:24:53):
Oh.

Speaker 5 (01:24:54):
I never realized he was a replacement for the human Torch.
I'd heard that he was like created for.

Speaker 4 (01:25:00):
Something like yeah, and they were like, we need an Orco.

Speaker 5 (01:25:05):
Pretty much, Well, it would be pre Orco, wouldn't it. Yeah,
it would be pre or is it did they need
an R two? Is it late enough? They did an
R two?

Speaker 3 (01:25:14):
It might have been early seventies, like maybe seventy three.

Speaker 4 (01:25:17):
It was kind of all those every every cartoon series
I can think of, yeah, pre a certain point, all
had that character that only existed so that at the
end of the episode it could go weep, womp and
they all go burger, Like every fucking cartoon did it.

Speaker 3 (01:25:40):
But it was nice they were able to fit Herbiaan
and then actually have them be somewhat important part of
the movie. Yeah, just to watch over Franklin while Galactus
comes and tears the building open.

Speaker 5 (01:25:51):
Well, it'd be just throw out the movie too, like
just having something in the background where they're like, like
when they go to meet Galactus the first time, and
they're just like, yeah, her, we can collect samples while
we go deal with Galacta, you know what I mean.
And then you're not having to have them do it.
It kind of works in a way where you're not
they're not distracted by that while they're dealing with Galactus,
because it would seem silly if they were.

Speaker 4 (01:26:14):
Yeah, yeah, I did. I kind of liked the fact
that they didn't entirely like Fridge Galactus like. Their big
plan was We're just gonna teleport him very far away
away from the spaceships.

Speaker 5 (01:26:28):
So then yeah, well yeah, the idea that they did
a good idea of setting up like Galactus like is
too big for them to simply destroy, right, So even
the original plan, which was to run the Earth away
from him, was like, okay, like, we're going to move
the entire Earth rather than trying to fight this thing.
Is I guess shorthand for that this is horrible and

(01:26:55):
will be around for many movies because we can't defeat it.

Speaker 4 (01:27:02):
Yeah, I feel like they actually maybe downplayed him a
little bit too much. I know it's hard to like
go super duper crazy powerful because it makes the movie nonsensey.
But yeah, again, not super complaining. I think he looked
better and he was Galactus for once instead of being

(01:27:22):
a monster cloud or whatever the fuck other weird fucking,
goddamn bullshit fucking Hollywood wants to do to a character
that everybody loves.

Speaker 5 (01:27:32):
What I liked was that they had him destroying planets
in his ship and then okay, get out of the
ship when it's time to fight. Fantastic four, so that
gives them that sort of advantage.

Speaker 4 (01:27:44):
Sure, sure, sure, which I thought was Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:27:47):
I like that they had a plan and that they
underestimated him, like when they blinded him for a moment,
thinking that then they could switch the baby out because
they use a baby as bait in this movie, which
I appreciate. Would they do that? And then he's it
was very good.

Speaker 4 (01:28:04):
It was very good at elucidating that that part of
read that is dangerous, that he will do the math
and see something and go, yeah, that's the thing we do.

Speaker 5 (01:28:19):
But I mean, really, I mean, to be fair, the
real thing is that he should have just given that
baby to Galectus, Like that's the objectively, like morally correct
thing to do, would have been to sacrifice that baby
to save the earth.

Speaker 4 (01:28:34):
I don't know, I don't know if that's actually accurate.

Speaker 5 (01:28:37):
But this is like we're getting into the territory of
like Infinity War, where we're like, well, we're gonna have
a war to save this one character, and it's like,
but a lot more people die in a war than that, Like.

Speaker 4 (01:28:48):
You know, there is this weird idea, but there's there's
the idea of justifiable death versus Yeah, I don't know.
It's complicated.

Speaker 5 (01:28:57):
Yeah, I just.

Speaker 4 (01:28:59):
I don't know. Anyways, that's well, it's complicated. And again
there's that great scene of the movie where he says
something about it that you know, that is the ethical
decision that is available, and Sue gets very very angry
at him, and he's like, I'm not saying I'm going
to do it, and she goes, yeah, but you did the.

Speaker 8 (01:29:19):
Math and he's like, well, well I thought you know, yeah,
yeah I did. I did the math, and and she's like, yeah,
that's the problem. The problem is you stopped and did
the math, and like, what are you doing? It's your son,
you know, you motherfucker you know.

Speaker 5 (01:29:36):
But yeah, I don't know. We're getting into a whole
other debate there of like, Okay, you're doing the math,
and it's like, well, you're just making a rash, emotional decision,
you know, Like how is that That's not always the
right way to decide things.

Speaker 4 (01:29:51):
So yeah, yeah, like I said, I don't know, I'm
into it. I'm into it because I like, I like
Read in the comic books, whenever he's not being a
perfect superhero, if that makes sense. I like the flawed,
bad Read who makes intellectual decisions sometimes that hurt people.

Speaker 5 (01:30:15):
I liked that all of the characters in this movie
were flawed.

Speaker 4 (01:30:18):
I thought that was good, although again I feel like
they didn't explore Bins issues enough. But maybe they're saving him.

Speaker 5 (01:30:29):
This is why I miss Blu Ray, because they could
easily put together, like, if there's more scenes of him
in the Natasha Leone character, you could put together like
a little thing for the Blu Ray that would be,
you know, his little plot line that went on in
the background that we didn't have time for in our movie.

Speaker 4 (01:30:49):
Do you guys want to hear a very funny, random
story about Natasha Leone in this movie? So the night
before I went and saw it, me and shar were
watching a little bit of Poke her Face and we
were talking about that actress, and sure, I was talking
about the fact that she goes you know what, her
hair is so iconic at this point, that giant, fucking

(01:31:11):
just mane of curly red hair that she has in
fucking everything, that if she straightened her hair, no one
would fucking recognize her. And then I went and saw
this movie, and she's got that fucking shorter of straight hair,
and I was like, oh, Jesus Christ. It did take
me a couple of seconds.

Speaker 5 (01:31:29):
Ago until she talks and then yeah, yeah.

Speaker 4 (01:31:34):
Yeah, it's very funny. I almost like it. Obviously, I'm
in a movie theater, so I wouldn't do it. I
Almoso wanted to take a picture of the screen and
send it to shot and be like, oh my god,
it happened.

Speaker 3 (01:31:45):
You couldn't, uh look out pictures of her from uh,
what's the movie? But I'm a cheerleaders very John Waters
esque movie is not one, but she gets sent to
like a gay conversion hospital and the fifties or something. Jesus,
It's it's like a it's like a satirical comedy though.

Speaker 4 (01:32:09):
So I do have to ask very John Waters in
what way.

Speaker 3 (01:32:14):
Uh, It's it's hard to explain, Like if you watched it,
you'd be like, oh, okay, I see what you mean.
It's just sort of that weird, kitchy, sort of a
little dirty and a little you know, like Cereal Mom.
Like if you compare Cereal Mom to this.

Speaker 4 (01:32:32):
I feel like there's or like maybe something like cry
maybe or something like that. Yeah, okay, okay, I was like, there, Well,
there's just a very big difference between that John Waters
and like cecil be demented John Water.

Speaker 3 (01:32:47):
Sure.

Speaker 5 (01:32:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:32:49):
Now I'm looking at pictures of the cover and her
hair isn't super straight, but it's not her usual frizziness.
But yeah, anybody see the Corman Fantastic Four cameos?

Speaker 4 (01:33:03):
No, I was gonna say, I was even watching for
it and I didn't see it.

Speaker 3 (01:33:09):
So the guy that played the thing, when there's a
bunch of like construction workers and it's during the Tony
Gilroy like presentation the TV show, the its olv A
s show, Yeah, and they're talking, oh, we love the
Fantastic Four, and then cut to regular citizens and there's
a bunch of construction workers and the guy that played

(01:33:30):
the thing, Michael Bailey Smith, he uh, he's one of
the construction workers. And then there's another shot a couple
of seconds later where it is all four of them
dressed up in you know, like suits and dresses and stuff.
It's all four of them standing going we love the
fan or you know whatever it was that everybody was saying. Yeah,

(01:33:52):
So all right, they got there. They got their moment
to shine on the big screen and a big, big, fantastic.

Speaker 4 (01:33:58):
I really desperately hope that this is the opportunity for
them to release that movie as like a special feature
on a DVD or something with yeah, because obviously I've
seen I've seen it, and I've seen a perfectly fine
copy of it. I just want I want a real
copy of it in a decent quality.

Speaker 3 (01:34:20):
I don't even know if there's any film prints left.
Supposedly Marvel bottom One destroyed them, but you know how
that goes.

Speaker 4 (01:34:27):
Which, again, I find that the whole concept to me
is so wild because I get it. I get that
they never meant for it to see the light of
day or whatever.

Speaker 5 (01:34:37):
It's just it's not that bad. It's yeah, I mean,
it's not MCU good, but it's I think if you
released it now and told people, oh, yeah, that was
a theatrical release in the nineties, people, young people would
believe you. They'd be like, yeah, these special effects like
something that would have happened in the nineties.

Speaker 4 (01:34:58):
This is nineties, which I feel like is so inaccurate.
I'd be like the early early eighties straight to video maybe,
I don't know, With the exception of the Reid Richards
broomstick arms, I mean that special effect by seventies standards

(01:35:22):
would have been cheesy.

Speaker 5 (01:35:23):
Yeah, Like that would have been if he cameoed in
the Spider Man TV series and used that special effect,
you'd be like, oh, come on.

Speaker 3 (01:35:32):
Yeah, anything else you want to say about Fantastic Four?

Speaker 4 (01:35:42):
Like I said, I don't know. Like I said, I wish,
I wish I could be more glowingly excited about it.

Speaker 5 (01:35:47):
But that sounds like a U issue to me, though.

Speaker 4 (01:35:50):
It probably is. And like I said, I don't have
any I don't have a lot of direct complaints about
it other than the minor stuff that I said. But
oh that's personal. So like me wanting to see more thing,
that's a personal thing. He's the most interesting character. He
didn't get enough screen time like, which hopefully that's because
they're gonna give him his own fucking movie, because a

(01:36:11):
thing movie would be great, like because you can explore,
you know, his problems with feeling ugly and disconnected and
you know.

Speaker 3 (01:36:21):
Look, I'm just saying, if him and Hulk don't fight
during one of these upcoming Avengers movies, what are we
even doing?

Speaker 5 (01:36:27):
I think he's downpowered to fight the version of Hulk
that we have in these movies.

Speaker 3 (01:36:35):
It doesn't matter me it needs to happen. Happened all
the time in the comics, and we all loved it.

Speaker 5 (01:36:40):
You guys got to get this out of your head, though,
because you liked something in the comics that that's gonna
work for a mainstream movie.

Speaker 3 (01:36:46):
It will, it'll work, Doug, shut up.

Speaker 4 (01:36:48):
I see. My problem is that it's not that like
it worked in the comics and therefore it will work
in a movie. It's that X is a good story tell.
You're wanting to tell a good story, you have story
tell the good story.

Speaker 5 (01:37:01):
This version of the Thing isn't taller than the rest
of the Fantastic Four. You're gonna put them up against
the version of Hulk we've been seeing in the fucking movies.

Speaker 4 (01:37:10):
Maybe there there is a definite thing in those in
the comic books where how strong the thing is is
one of those things that it is wildly inconsistent.

Speaker 5 (01:37:22):
Yeah, I even feel in this movie it was a
bit inconsistent, because you know, that's just how it is.

Speaker 3 (01:37:28):
But I think he could take on smart Hulk.

Speaker 4 (01:37:31):
Oh that's true. Right now, he is a bitch Hulk.

Speaker 3 (01:37:35):
So it's a little bit smaller than like the baral.

Speaker 5 (01:37:39):
Version of Hulk. Yeah, all right, but then you have
to have smart Hulk turn evil, which I don't think
they're doing.

Speaker 3 (01:37:47):
No, they don't. They just have a big competition between
each other, thinking each one. It's like Hulk and Thor
essentially from the Avengers movie. Right, yeah, just let it happen,
Doug happened?

Speaker 5 (01:38:00):
What's sorry?

Speaker 3 (01:38:02):
All right, somebody's everything else?

Speaker 5 (01:38:04):
Say no, I really liked the movie. I deny a
little bit rushed. Sure, I'd rather it be a little
rushed and be two hours than stretching out every storyline
and making it three.

Speaker 4 (01:38:17):
So well, actually, you know what I do. I do
have one complaint. The after credits is weak. It is stupid, like, uh,
which one the end?

Speaker 2 (01:38:27):
End?

Speaker 6 (01:38:28):
Oh?

Speaker 5 (01:38:29):
I also went and saw this with my kid.

Speaker 4 (01:38:31):
Oh no, no, no, sorry, the mid credits, not the
not the not the cartoon thing, because the cartoon thing
was funny, Yeah, okay, good, But the the mid credit scene,
because I don't know, the stupid half reveal a fad
character in which it's like, yeah, but it's not a surprise.
Everyone already knows. Everyone already knows that character is cast,

(01:38:53):
Everyone already knows who's playing that fucking character. Why why
do you do the mysterious over the shoulder when everybody
already knows.

Speaker 3 (01:39:04):
Well, it's even more annoying because apparently that actually was
Robert Downey Junior. So I don't know why they didn't
just do something a little bit.

Speaker 5 (01:39:11):
More involved, because you say everybody knows, but everybody knows,
we know, and the people listening to this know. But
the whole goal of these movies is to reach a
mainstream audience, and a mainstream audience doesn't know.

Speaker 4 (01:39:26):
Yes, a mainstream audience in this particular fucking case knows.

Speaker 5 (01:39:32):
I'm saying. And the children that I've talked to don't
know who doctor Doom is. So no, they don't know
who's playing him. That's there's a huge potential reveal coming
up for here for a lot of people that that
the echo chamber problem of the Internet is very real

(01:39:55):
when it comes to discussing superhero movies. We think people
know about this shit.

Speaker 4 (01:39:59):
They don't. Once again, I have had I suppose that
there are children out there.

Speaker 5 (01:40:08):
Who when superhero movie, When Superman came out a couple
of weeks ago, I've had to explain to multiple people that, like,
there are different green lanterns, and that's why this Green
Lantern acts so much different than the Ryan Reynolds version
because they don't understand that Green Lanterns are multiple like,

(01:40:28):
they don't even get that.

Speaker 4 (01:40:30):
So sure, but again with Green Lantern, I'm not expecting
a mainstream audience to know anything like that. I'm saying.
In this case, we are talking about the character who
is the most breakthrough mainstream character now being played or well,
you know what I mean, the actor, I should say,

(01:40:52):
being the one who kind of broke out. Everyone knows
iron Man. Everyone knows, everyone knows, well, everybody knows Robert,
and everybody knows that they made a giant announcement that
he was returning to play fucking Doom.

Speaker 5 (01:41:08):
I think if you go out on the street and
you ask the average person, did they hear Robert Downey
Junior is coming back to the MCU, half of them
heard it, and of those at least half think that
means iron Man is coming back.

Speaker 4 (01:41:24):
All right, listen, maybe that is correct, and people are
just that no, not that the most that they don't care.

Speaker 5 (01:41:35):
They won't they don't know, like they don't know that
Doomsday is happening. They don't, you know what I mean? Sure,
I have some people that my neighbor repeatedly for referring
to the Amazing Spider Man movies as parts like four
and five of Spider Mans. I will not allow that
to happen, you know what I mean, But like I

(01:41:55):
will tell like, I'm like, no, no, no, those are
different movies that are different, and I will It's like
something where I've said enough that my neighbor doesn't talk
to me about Spider Man anymore.

Speaker 3 (01:42:06):
Jesus Doug also has nerd rage.

Speaker 5 (01:42:10):
I do. Well, I'm not denying I have it.

Speaker 3 (01:42:13):
It's just I will say I do think there's a
lot of mainstream people that probably don't know movies are
coming out until they see a trailer at the movie theater,
which I long to go back to that situation. Oh,
I just I know way too much and I pay
attention way too much, and I know everything that's going

(01:42:34):
to happen.

Speaker 5 (01:42:35):
Yeah, I this is why I've actively stopped trying to
like learn as much about upcoming movies. But it's hard
not to.

Speaker 3 (01:42:49):
Yeah, trust me now, Meme US three are definitely in
the We pay attention to way too much shit, so
we know shit.

Speaker 5 (01:42:57):
Yeah, and we and most of the people we talked
to probably also fall into that category.

Speaker 3 (01:43:04):
There were a lot of people that were surprised and
or happy. That's the Fantastic Four screening I was at,
and when that popped up, they were like, oh.

Speaker 4 (01:43:17):
Yeah, yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:43:19):
The afternoon screening where it was all kids, and there
was a lot of kids like turning to their dad's
going what like what? Including mine? Like, he doesn't o
Doctor Dumas.

Speaker 4 (01:43:30):
Because you're a bad parent, because I should.

Speaker 5 (01:43:34):
Have shown those old, those old movies to teach them.

Speaker 3 (01:43:39):
All of the three movies that actually came out, it's
not act like they're the best representation.

Speaker 4 (01:43:46):
I was referring more to the forcing your child to
read comic books. But sure, sure, sure, sure movies.

Speaker 3 (01:43:56):
All right, do you watch anything else? Now?

Speaker 4 (01:43:59):
I think that's it.

Speaker 3 (01:44:00):
What's you watch, Doug?

Speaker 5 (01:44:02):
A couple other things, you know, and keeping in line
with what we're supposed to talk about in our drive
in podcast, I saw some eighties horror. Watched Hell High,
which I've never seen before. It is a slasher film,
So there's your plot. In this particular case, it is

(01:44:23):
a little girl murders some people, and cut to eighteen
years later, that little girl is now a teacher and
the students that are high school are being awfully annoying.
Want to guess where this is headed. It is definitely
in the lower end of slasher movies where it does
that thing where there's like an hour of like no

(01:44:46):
killing and then just like here's where we kill all
the people in this like fifteen minute kills spree at
the end, but the hour leading up to it is
cheesy eighties fun in a way that it this way.
The annoying kids one of them has been like either
quit or kicked off the football team, I can't remember which,

(01:45:07):
and so they decide they're mad at football now. So
during like the big match where everybody the whole school's
excited for the football team to win, they drive onto
the field and intercept the ball when it's being thrown
and drive off with it. So if that's something you
want to see, it's you know what I mean, Like
it says more about you whether you want to see
that or not, than it does about the movie. But

(01:45:29):
the weird thing.

Speaker 4 (01:45:29):
The weird thing is is that feels less like an
eighty slasher and more like a movie like Friday Night Lights.

Speaker 5 (01:45:39):
I can see it happening Friday Night Lights as well. Yeah,
but it's it would be totally very different in those
two things. Yeah, I don't know. It's I had a
lot of fun watching it because it starts with a
little girl killing some people on a motorcycle. She like,
so she's playing in the swamp where she's not allowed
to go, and this like teenage couple comes down and

(01:46:01):
they're like, they go into like the shack where she
was because they're going to bang in there, and they
break her doll that she left in there. So when
they come out, she throws mud in the face of
the guys. He's driving off in his motorcycle, which causes
it to crash and they both get him paled on
a fence and they look like Dracula at the end
of Monster Squad, just like right out there and paled
on the fence. Like I'm not sure how that worked.

(01:46:23):
That seems irrational. I liked the twist on the old
like it's usually like there was like a prank and
it's the victims of the prank that are like traumatized
years later and come back and kill. In this case,
they're like, oh, the little girl's traumatized from killing those people.
So because I got a little nervous when it cut
to eighteen years later and we're in high school, and
I'm like, they're not going to try to convince me

(01:46:45):
that eighteen years later that little girl's in high school
because she's like eight or whatever, like, oh no, she's
the teacher. Oh okay, okay. As soon as the teacher
showed up in the clay in the room and she
had blonde hair, I'm like, oh, well, the little girl
in the beginning had blonde hair. That's enough for me.
I know what we're doing here now. The weirdest thing
about watching this movie, and maybe you guys can explain
it to me. I watched it on YouTube and there's

(01:47:06):
a couple of moments where they've clearly edited out nudity,
and I'm like, that's interesting because they're not editing out
the violence, and they're not editing out all of the nudity,
So why is just that nudity missing? So I did
a little research, and from what I can tell, I
think somebody edited out the nudity whenever a body double
was used, but not when the actual actress takes her

(01:47:29):
close up. So walk me through how that logic works.
What well, like so like is do we think like
that the Body Double Union is just way more strict
about getting things off YouTube than the producers of this
film were, so they're just like, oh, this is our
way to get away with it. I don't know.

Speaker 3 (01:47:52):
I don't know.

Speaker 5 (01:47:53):
I couldn't piece it together. But I'm like, there's a
scene where it's like and it's not like full nudity,
but there's like, you know, one of the main actresses
in the it's the teacher, and like the students are
spying on her as part of their harassing her. That
causes her to go nuts and kill them all. But
it's a and You're like, okay, well there's so they
are allowing some nudity in this And then I'm like,
but then why when that scene where that girl obviously

(01:48:15):
flashed earlier, why why was that cutout? And I'm like,
when I google it, every every scene and why there's
such a detailed breakdown into the nud ety in this film,
I do not know. But if you go to IMDb,
it will break down where a body double was used
to wear what was And so.

Speaker 3 (01:48:35):
It's very funny. It wasn't linea quickly was it?

Speaker 4 (01:48:39):
No?

Speaker 3 (01:48:40):
She seems to be the go to like, we need
new to the This actress won't do it. Somebody call lina.

Speaker 5 (01:48:46):
I don't think I hit the budget for Linae in
this movie.

Speaker 4 (01:48:49):
Get them then, get them titties out.

Speaker 3 (01:48:54):
Oh you already did?

Speaker 4 (01:48:58):
Did you hire her?

Speaker 5 (01:48:59):
No?

Speaker 4 (01:49:00):
Where did she come from?

Speaker 3 (01:49:02):
She just showed up, took her top off. This is
an airbud movie. I don't even know what she.

Speaker 4 (01:49:08):
Said Airbud four tits.

Speaker 5 (01:49:15):
There's nothing in the rule book that says the tits
can't throw the basketball. All right, I think we're time
with our detailed discussion of Hell High. It's a slasher movie.
I feel like slasher movies. Watch it.

Speaker 3 (01:49:36):
By the way, the people that did the In Search
of Darkness documentaries, Yeah, they're doing one specifically on eighties slashers.
I'm super excited.

Speaker 5 (01:49:46):
That sounds fun.

Speaker 3 (01:49:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:49:50):
The only other movie I watched this week is another
eighties horror movie called The Kindred. Do you guys know
this one?

Speaker 3 (01:50:00):
But I haven't seen it.

Speaker 4 (01:50:01):
It sounds one of those sounds really familiar.

Speaker 5 (01:50:03):
It's one of those ones that like, I liked the
box art when I was a kid, and I it
just takes me this long to get around a shit,
so I'm finally watching this nineteen eighty something movie based
on the box art that I enjoyed. It's a bit
of a weird setup, but it's a neat thing where
so retired scientist passes away her son, who's now a

(01:50:23):
scientist that works at the same company as her, takes
a group of the scientists to go clean out her
house because she was doing experiments at her house even
though she was technically retired, and then the experiment starts
like killing them off, and they have to deal with
it because the experiment is, like it turns out, I

(01:50:44):
guess spoiler alert, it's like a hybrid of like some
kind of aquatic animal DNA with a human So always good.
That makes it that makes it want to kill people.
But the movie's really good. Like there's the opening little
while where they're like searching this house and there's like

(01:51:04):
tentacles coming up through the floor and they have a
dog with them, and the dog's like pawing at the
tentacles and you're like, oh, I want to know what's
attached to those tentacles. And the one guy's got in
the garage and he gets attacked, and you do the
whole like cheesy eighties thing where you're like, they're like
what they found, like this whatever pheromone in his system
that you can only get if you're bit by a fish,

(01:51:24):
but he was bit on land. What could it be
in this an audience you obviously already pieced it all together,
but you're like still having fun watching them go through
the motions.

Speaker 4 (01:51:34):
You're like, fish monster, that's what you're talking about, right,
it's the fresh monster.

Speaker 5 (01:51:38):
We're all figuring it out. But then when the like
when the reveal comes of like the monster. Like, even
if you're not going to watch this movie, like Google,
some of the special effects they're really cool, you know,
just weird tentacle baby monster running around and stuff like that,
and you're like, that's really neat. I really wish I
watched it on YouTube, and I wish I'd watched it

(01:52:01):
in a higher quality format. Like it's one of the
things where I'm like, this, this should have been a
Blu Ray, not fucking just YouTube recommended it to me
because I watched Hell High and those apparently fallow in
the same category. But yeah, it's a big recommend. Like
the special effects are good, the story is like it
is what it is it's eighties horror, but it's well

(01:52:23):
done because of course some like annoying love triangle mixed
into it, which ends up being plot relevant at the end.
I won't spoil the twists that make it plot relevant,
but if you've seen horror movies before, you'll probably figure
them out as you're watching the movie, like, it's, uh yeah,
but it's it's the special effects and the monster are

(01:52:45):
what you're in it for. And I would definitely recommend
it for that, along with just the joy of watching
eighties horror and be like, wait, he's taking this team
of scientists from this company to clean out his mother's house.
I don't know if you're a low to do that.
That doesn't seem right. Why was she doing these Like
we're just going to acknowledge that she was doing these
illegal experiments.

Speaker 4 (01:53:06):
We need to go to the house and to do science.

Speaker 5 (01:53:10):
Yeah, it's and then they're all just staying there while
they do it, you know. And of course it's like
a wife or girlfriend whatever she is, comes, even though
she's not technically part of the team, but she's got
to be there for the love triangle to exist.

Speaker 4 (01:53:25):
So did you bring the science machine?

Speaker 5 (01:53:28):
It's I think. I think conceptually there might be just
enough like dialogue in there that the scientists are there
to clean out the sciencey parts of the house, and
then the wife is there to clean out like just
the personal stuff. But the lines get blurred pretty quickly
once they're all up there, so it's not really an issue.

(01:53:51):
But yeah, I mean, like Tentacle Baby, monsters, that's the
thing you like when you be in it. For this movie,
i'd say, anywan it's a fan of eighties horror should
watch it, which I think includes three of us if
I'm not mistaken.

Speaker 4 (01:54:05):
Mm, you had me at tent Baby.

Speaker 3 (01:54:10):
Yeah, I didn't even get to the monster part.

Speaker 5 (01:54:15):
I mean, is it really a monster or is the
monster the person who created that portentle baby the monster? Us?
It was me.

Speaker 4 (01:54:25):
I was the monster the whole time.

Speaker 5 (01:54:29):
Yeah. So anyways, I think that's all I watched this week.
Do you have anything, Brian?

Speaker 4 (01:54:36):
Uh?

Speaker 5 (01:54:36):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (01:54:36):
So, by the way, Doug, I forgot to tell you
you're picking movies for next week. Oh you may want
to do that.

Speaker 4 (01:54:42):
Well.

Speaker 5 (01:54:43):
I wasn't gonna listen to what you said anyway, So
now I have something else to do.

Speaker 4 (01:54:46):
Well.

Speaker 3 (01:54:47):
The first one I watched involves you, and I actually
watched it two weeks ago. I forgot to bring it
up last week. So a while back, me and Doug
both got into watching the movie Angel from nineteen eighty four,
and then we found out there was four of these
damn movies. And then you watched the second one and
you're like, well, I'm done. I think that, yeah, And

(01:55:11):
I was just finally getting around to well, maybe maybe
the second one wasn't that bad. I don't know. Sometimes
being Doug don't agree on stuff, and so I watched
Avenging Angel, and uh, yeah, that wasn't good. It was
not good. I was very disappointed. Brings back a lot
of the side characters from the first one. They recast
the main girl and then instead of like a serial killer,

(01:55:35):
it's like a fucking real estate scheme or some bullshit
reason to like, oh, we're gonna buy up all this
land or something. I don't know. It was fucking terrible.

Speaker 5 (01:55:47):
I can't remember the plot. I just remember not enjoying it.
I remember being annoyed that I didn't enjoy it.

Speaker 3 (01:55:53):
Well, it's like the cop who helped her in the
first one. She graduates high school and he gets killed
or something, so she comes back after she's been gone
for like two years, and then it turns out he
found out about some shady deal that was going on,
so they had him killed, and now they're after her
for whatever reason, and she of course gets all of

(01:56:15):
her street wise friends back together to help her out,
and it just was like, oh, this, this is not good.

Speaker 4 (01:56:25):
I was just thinking the other day that I did
not have enough street wise friends to go on adventures with.

Speaker 3 (01:56:31):
You don't have the guy that does the three card
monte magic tricks on the corner, or the weird cowboy
that just walks around with loaded guns for some reason,
with the weird lesbian artists that owned the apartment building
she lived in in the first one. It's quite an
eclectic group of people. So it's disappointed. I still kind

(01:56:55):
of want to watch the third one, just because I'm
the completest and I feel like I have to watch
all the way through.

Speaker 5 (01:57:01):
We've all had that problem.

Speaker 3 (01:57:03):
Yeah, well, maybe they learned their lesson, maybe they've fixed
it up in the third one. I'm gonna guess that's
probably not gonna be the case. But and then I'll
be like, well, there's one more left. I should watch
the fourth one. Probably.

Speaker 4 (01:57:15):
Well, I mean, if you're gonna sit through one and
a half bad movies, might.

Speaker 3 (01:57:23):
Go the full way.

Speaker 5 (01:57:24):
Well, No, to be fair, the original Angel was a
good movie. So you've only sat through one bit movie,
not one and a half year.

Speaker 4 (01:57:30):
I would argue the original one is a mediocre movie.

Speaker 5 (01:57:33):
But okay, dare you I remember enjoying it. I think
it was one of those ones that to be started
without my permission and I just watched it anyway, So.

Speaker 3 (01:57:47):
So I don't know if you remember. But a while
back I went through, Ah, here's some fod nineties thrillers.

Speaker 1 (01:57:53):
Kick.

Speaker 3 (01:57:54):
Yeah, I started to get a hankren for eight nineties
Jack Nicholson thrillers.

Speaker 5 (01:58:04):
Why it's a weird era to pick for if you're
gonna like narrow in on Jack Nicholson's career.

Speaker 4 (01:58:09):
Yeah, this one can include wolf in there.

Speaker 3 (01:58:15):
No, no, no, And I've only watched one so far.
So and this one's actually from two thousand and one,
but I've watched the Pledge, which has it's directed by
Sean pay.

Speaker 4 (01:58:26):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:58:26):
I wanted to see this one. I never got around
to it.

Speaker 3 (01:58:29):
Okay, we'll try to not be spoilery, but so Jack
Nicholson's a cop. He's a cop who's about to retire.
Then he literally is at his retirement party at some
point he goes to leave and they're like, oh, you,
but you're done, and he's like, I'm still employed for
the next six hours. So he's that kind of cop.

(01:58:52):
And apparently there's like an eight year old girl that
has been found in the woods and she was assaulted
and murdered, and so then he promises the mom that, like,
I will do what I can to find out what
happened to her. And then it becomes this where even
though technically he's retired and he's been kicked off the case.

Speaker 4 (01:59:13):
He just can't let it go.

Speaker 3 (01:59:15):
He just can't let it go. So the movie unfolds
over like the next year almost where he figures a
bunch of shit out and even moved to a certain
area see if he can figure out who the killer is.
Because something happens in the movie that makes them think,
oh no, it was this guy and that's all been
taken care of, and he's like, no, that doesn't make

(01:59:35):
any sense. But the police force is like, now we're done.
We did it, we solved it, and that's all. It's
taken care of. Itself.

Speaker 4 (01:59:43):
Yeah, but he's got to keep going even though he's
too old for this shit.

Speaker 3 (01:59:47):
Pretty much. Yeah, there's a lot of that. Yeah, the
movie's good. The way it ends is a little for me.
It was kind of eh, Doug, I'd be interested if
you watched it, see what you thought. If nothing else.
I thought Jack Nicholson's performance was really good because I mean,
this is two thousand and one, so he was definitely

(02:00:10):
like this is sort of the end game section of
his career. Yeah, he gives a really good performance because
it is so low key that he's not doing like
the Jack Nicholson character.

Speaker 5 (02:00:26):
Just trying to remind people who as a good actor
after becoming like Jack Nicholson for so long.

Speaker 3 (02:00:31):
Yeah, pretty much. Yeah, And so it's really interesting to
watch his performance and be like, oh wow, he's like
actually really quiet and has a really subtle performance and
he's not being real big in the movie. He's actually
dialed it way back and that's actually kind of good.

Speaker 5 (02:00:50):
So he doesn't have a mustache.

Speaker 3 (02:00:52):
He does have a mustache.

Speaker 5 (02:00:53):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (02:00:54):
See, now I'm confused. I don't know if I want
to see this.

Speaker 3 (02:01:01):
The cast is loaded though, it's so as Jack Nicholson
Helen Muren, Aaron Eckhart, Robin Wright, Sam Sheppard, Beniicio del Toro,
Patricia Clarkson, Mickey Rourke. This is one of Mickey Work's
first movies after coming out of boxing for a while,
and he couldn't get a He couldn't get a job,

(02:01:23):
so Sean Penn like cast him in this really small
part and he does like a really good job. So
he started to get more calls after this, and then
Vanessa Redgrave, Harry Dean, Stanton, Tom Noonan shows up. Yeah.
I mean the movie is just like every face is like,
oh I know that person. I know that person. So

(02:01:46):
I'd say if you wanted to see it, definitely watch
it because I would like to have a discussion about
the ending, see how it worked for you.

Speaker 4 (02:01:54):
Yeah, and Ceo del Toro is one of those actors
that my brain has a very hard time. I'm placing
him in a timeline. Does that makes sense? Because every
once in a while somebody will be like, but needs
adel Toro was in this movie and I'm like, was
he acting? Then? When did he start acting? How old Toro?

Speaker 3 (02:02:17):
Well, let me let me give you some incentive. He
plays a guy with brain damage.

Speaker 4 (02:02:23):
In this movie, and I'm assuming it is a not
gentle version of it.

Speaker 3 (02:02:31):
It's not like offensive, but he makes some choices with
his character's voice and stuff that you're just like, well,
someone came up with some ideas and apparently Sean Penn
was like, let's give it a shot. I'm not saying
it works, but it's it's definitely something. Luckily he's not
in it like a whole lot, but it's just like WHOA.

(02:02:53):
So the next one I have up my list is
The Crossing Guard, which is a movie Jack Nicholson and
Sean penran together, which I think is what led to
their friendship.

Speaker 5 (02:03:04):
And this movie I hope it's about a crossing guard
that it's way too involved in the life of like
the mystery surrounding. One of the kids that doesn't like
doesn't show up to cross the street one day and
they're like where they have gone?

Speaker 3 (02:03:16):
I mean, I think you just made a great movie.

Speaker 5 (02:03:19):
Yeah, I do.

Speaker 4 (02:03:23):
I do want to say it it is. It is
a cop drummer, right, isn't it? The Crossing Guard?

Speaker 3 (02:03:29):
Crossing Guard? I think so. From from the description I
read and Doug this may entice you, it seems like
it's very much in line with the movie Blue Ruin. Oh, like,
his daughter is killed and as you know, years go

(02:03:51):
by and he's not able to get over it, and
then apparently the person responsible is released from jail, so
he starts plotting his way to get revenge against them.

Speaker 5 (02:04:00):
So does he use the sign from his crossing card
job to beat them to death with what is it
called that?

Speaker 3 (02:04:07):
I don't know.

Speaker 5 (02:04:09):
It does sound interesting when that plot description sounds really good. Actually,
you're gonna drag me into this weird late nineties Jack nicholsoner.

Speaker 3 (02:04:19):
Probably this is from nineteen ninety four. This has got Jack,
This has got Angelica Houston. Robin Wright is also in
this one. Hyper Laurie Jesus just Carry Carrie Werer?

Speaker 5 (02:04:34):
Oh I remember carry were Yeah.

Speaker 3 (02:04:37):
So yeah, so that's next to my list. I'm gonna
try to maybe watch that this week.

Speaker 5 (02:04:41):
So it's interesting the idea that Carry Werer would be
in a movie with Jack Nicholson.

Speaker 3 (02:04:45):
I remember her from More of a It does seem
like a weird crossing the sty Yeah.

Speaker 5 (02:04:51):
My knowledge of her is from like, oh, it's like
the direct sequels to Wishmaster, Like.

Speaker 3 (02:04:56):
Yeah, usually a low budget like B movie.

Speaker 5 (02:04:59):
Yeah, which means, which means I've seen a lot more
of her work than I have of Jack Nicholson's Little
Little do.

Speaker 4 (02:05:06):
You know that during his plotting for revenge against the
guy that killed his daughter, he meets a strange man
passing what he wants.

Speaker 2 (02:05:21):
Uh.

Speaker 3 (02:05:22):
And then the last thing I, uh I watched. I
watched the new Leelo and Stitch movie.

Speaker 4 (02:05:28):
The live action one. Yeah, which it's just these are
feeling weird now.

Speaker 5 (02:05:35):
It is, that's reasonable. Uh.

Speaker 3 (02:05:38):
And the reason I was kind of like, I'll watch
it was because I've actually never seen the cartoon. I've
heard the cartoon is really good, just never got around
watching it. Fine, and I had, you know, access to this,
and I was like, yeah, why not? Me and Cindy
watched it. And Cindy's daughters love animated movie, so Cindy

(02:06:02):
has seen it multiple times and really enjoys it. So
it was interesting to watch. And when it was over,
She's like, that was actually pretty good and was actually
pretty in line with uh, with the animated As far
as plot, they do change up a couple things apparently,
but nothing like super dramatic.

Speaker 4 (02:06:19):
Well yeah, I mean the good news is pretty much
all the people who made the original could be involved
because it was made twenty fucking years ago, not fucking
eighty years ago like some of them. Yeah, Like I said,
it's a weird The decision to turn it live action
feels so strange because I understand the corporate decision of

(02:06:41):
the other ones of their trying to find a way
around the rules to keep things copyrighted, that they're losing
the copyrights too, But this they weren't any risk of
losing copyrights to it.

Speaker 5 (02:06:54):
No, But when they started doing live action remakes of
their movies, they realized they could make money do it,
and now they're just doing it over and over again.
I suppose I think like I'd imagine there's a like
a wall in Disney with just all their titles on it,
and they're like, we need a live action remake, and
somebody just goes and grabs someone at random, and it

(02:07:16):
just brings it over.

Speaker 4 (02:07:17):
I'd imagine that they turned to somebody and they're like, hey, John,
it's your turn, and he goes, oh, cool, let's remake
my favorite one. Let's do Hunchback of Notre Dame. And
they're like, John, you're fired.

Speaker 5 (02:07:28):
A live action remake of Hunchback and.

Speaker 4 (02:07:32):
I don't know if you remember this, but the villain
in a Hunchback of Notre Dame they went full menacing
priest sex pervert. Its a Disney movie. There's zero chance
that they ever attempted again. They're like, so, we're going
to make a movie about a handicapped guy where the

(02:07:53):
villain is a menacing sex pervert and we refer to
the main female character as a gypsy five hundred times.

Speaker 5 (02:08:01):
I mean, it's closer to the other versions of the
story that I'm expecting because I've never seen the Disney version.

Speaker 3 (02:08:10):
This one is talking gargoyles there.

Speaker 4 (02:08:12):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, there's a durable talking gargoyles in addition
to the horror of the story of the Hunchback in nerd.

Speaker 5 (02:08:26):
Yes, it got me really curious about the Disney movie
that I had no interest in and kind of forgot existed.

Speaker 3 (02:08:32):
I mean, don't get a twisted. It's not like the
darkest thing you'll ever see, but it is like for
a movie that's like a Disney version of a classic story,
You're like, whoa, that is way darker.

Speaker 4 (02:08:44):
Though, I mean, like, so they don't say the exact words,
but very literally the villain at one point expresses the
fact that basically es Morelda has given me an erection,
so she must die.

Speaker 5 (02:09:03):
Yeah, so it's reasonable rational thought process.

Speaker 4 (02:09:05):
Then they well, I mean it's true to Christianity.

Speaker 3 (02:09:09):
I guess, yeah. And uh so Lelo had Stitch. They
do bring a lot of people that did voices in
the original and have them play like apparently Tea Carreer
did the voice of the older sister in the original one,
and now she plays like the social worker that is

(02:09:31):
trying to keep them from being separated. At some point.
The character that played like the teenage love interests for
the sister was played by Jason Scott Lee, and now
he plays her boss at her job or whatever. So
they try to sprinkle in like all the sort of
legacy people that were in bold with the first one.

Speaker 4 (02:09:52):
Yeah, like I said, the good news is everyone's still
around because it was made five years ago.

Speaker 5 (02:09:58):
Some of them are still under contract.

Speaker 3 (02:10:01):
And the writer director of the original did the voice
of Stitch and so they just had him come in
and just do the voice of it here too, So
so yeah, yeah, like I said, Cindy told me it
was pretty on par like, oh, yeah, it's pretty good.
And I mean as far as the story goes, it's
pretty in line, you know, changes here and there, but
nothing overly dramatic. And apparently it made like a billion

(02:10:25):
dollars at the box office.

Speaker 4 (02:10:26):
So well, yeah, because all the kids that liked it
five years ago are still kids five years ago. It's
a joke. It's just very recent. I'm saying, they're going
from remaking movies that were made in nineteen thirty seven
to remaking things that were in our lifetime.

Speaker 3 (02:10:48):
Oh yeah, for sure. It is a big stretch from
snow White that just came out last year too, Hew
and Stitch.

Speaker 5 (02:10:56):
I forgot that Snow White remake came out.

Speaker 4 (02:10:59):
Oh my god. The screen stills that people do of
it or are the best things I've ever seen in
my entire life of her, The random frames of her
facial expressions where people are like, what it was going
on with her face in this movie? She looks like
she looks like an AI malfunctioning, like just making a weird,

(02:11:23):
funked up face.

Speaker 5 (02:11:25):
I haven't even seen that. I'm mostly like two fine
interviews with little people actors who are super mad at
Peter Dinklish for getting them to change that movie.

Speaker 1 (02:11:37):
Here a brief blimp of some of the Pruy fine pictures.
We've scheduled them in near good.

Speaker 3 (02:11:42):
All right, Doug, you were tasked with finding us movies
for next week. What do we got.

Speaker 5 (02:11:47):
I think we're gonna do some sci fi. We'll do
Forbidden World and in Seminoid.

Speaker 3 (02:11:57):
I not see you the one, but I in some
Anoid has me a little worried. There's lots of rape
next week.

Speaker 5 (02:12:04):
So what it's about. I can't remember what Inseminoid is.
Forbidden the World I remember seeing, liking it and putting
it on the list so we could discuss it further.

Speaker 4 (02:12:12):
You can't draw some conclusions off the title of in Seminoid.

Speaker 5 (02:12:19):
I don't like to jump to conclusions. I'm not like
you guys. I'm not all judgmental and ship.

Speaker 3 (02:12:23):
I'm not going to make a Matt for a home game.

Speaker 5 (02:12:28):
I will will not.

Speaker 4 (02:12:30):
I will tell you this if this makes you reconsider
your decisions in life. I know what that movie is.

Speaker 6 (02:12:40):
Oh shit, God damn it, you dumb bech.

Speaker 3 (02:12:57):
Doug's worried.

Speaker 4 (02:12:58):
Now what do I do? I need listen. It's not
on the level of like Breeders. So you got that.

Speaker 3 (02:13:11):
You're gonna do, Doug, you can stick with it. Are
you gonna pick something else?

Speaker 5 (02:13:14):
I think I'm calling it audible. I think I'm trying
to take something else right now. No way, I'm watching
something that Noah likes.

Speaker 4 (02:13:22):
I didn't say I like it. I'm saying it's a
film that I'm just generally aware of. I don't.

Speaker 5 (02:13:29):
Yeah, that's enough. So much of the bullshit on our
list now is do the stupid Kevin Bacon one that
the listener wanted us to do.

Speaker 3 (02:13:40):
Do that instead brea Kevin Bacon lights.

Speaker 5 (02:13:43):
Rivers, Sure whatever. We have more than one Kevin Bacon show.

Speaker 3 (02:13:48):
I'm just asking if that's the one Sure Whitewater Summer
in the River Wild.

Speaker 5 (02:13:54):
I don't. I don't know. I just don't want to
do a movie that Noah suggests.

Speaker 4 (02:13:58):
I didn't suggest it.

Speaker 5 (02:13:59):
You do you pick feel like tricking me into not
watching the movie now, but I did not.

Speaker 4 (02:14:06):
And again, you put that on the list, not I
said the.

Speaker 5 (02:14:09):
Can because Forbidden World is good.

Speaker 4 (02:14:14):
But yeah, I just I just find it strange that
you heard the title in seminoid and we're like, yeah,
that sounds like it's my thing.

Speaker 3 (02:14:23):
That's probably something I can watch with Orlando.

Speaker 5 (02:14:28):
I guess I'm making me very unhappy. I don't know
why you're being mean to me this week.

Speaker 3 (02:14:32):
I'm not being mean.

Speaker 4 (02:14:34):
I was getting ready to say I was just charitable
and gave you a simple war.

Speaker 3 (02:14:39):
Look, if you can't decide, we can do a Scott
backular week and do Major League back to the minors
U necessary roughness.

Speaker 5 (02:14:46):
No, I don't want to watch necessary roughness. I'm very
happy memories of necessary roughness, and I'm reasonably confident I'm
not going to if I rewatch it now, so.

Speaker 3 (02:14:58):
Only because Rob Schneider is in it, and he's horrible
human being.

Speaker 5 (02:15:03):
He just schneiders in that every time he's the.

Speaker 3 (02:15:06):
Announcer at the at the football field and he does
his whole Fumberlina. Oh, you're right, he does his SNL bullshit.

Speaker 4 (02:15:14):
Yeah, he just I don't know how Rob Schneider manages
to be obnoxious with every fucking sentence he says that
isn't scripted beforehand.

Speaker 5 (02:15:28):
Yeah, I don't know. I don't even listen to much
of what he says.

Speaker 4 (02:15:33):
Yeah, never intentionally, but god damn it. Everyone's all about
watching something and he like he'll be on the red
carpet somebody holds out a microphone and they're like, oh,
I did what are you doing here? Rob Schneider And
he's like, poor people are fucking stupid. And it's like,
oh god, damn it, you fucking busy shit.

Speaker 7 (02:15:51):
You know.

Speaker 5 (02:15:58):
All right?

Speaker 3 (02:15:59):
Are we going Kevin Bacon? Are we sticking?

Speaker 2 (02:16:02):
No?

Speaker 5 (02:16:04):
You has tricked me into switching to Kevin Bacon.

Speaker 4 (02:16:07):
I think I didn't do anything.

Speaker 5 (02:16:11):
You knew what you were doing.

Speaker 4 (02:16:14):
Uh, Like I said, I was just I was just
shocked that you weren't aware that a movie with the
name in seminoid might be the type of garbage that
I watched.

Speaker 3 (02:16:30):
Oh I heard Lando in the background. That is the
show's over.

Speaker 5 (02:16:33):
The show's over. Bye, guys.

Speaker 1 (02:16:35):
Please remember to replace the speaker on the post when
you leave the theater.

Speaker 4 (02:16:49):
And now, folks, it's time to say good night.

Speaker 1 (02:16:51):
We sincerely appreciate your patronage and hope we've succeeded in
bringing you an enjoyable evening of entertainment.

Speaker 3 (02:16:58):
Please drive home carefully and come back again.

Speaker 4 (02:17:00):
So good night.

Speaker 6 (02:17:09):
Mm hmm.

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