The Ambulance & D.O.A.

Ever been poisoned? Well two of the leads in our movies have and it doesn't seem to be a great time. First up, we learn that when Eric Roberts worked at Marvel Comics he got to hang out with Stan Lee in THE AMBULANCE. Then, we find out that Dennis Quaid is a pretty lousy teacher in D.O.A.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
At a hearty welcome to our drive in theater. We
have a wonderful evening's entertainment lined up for you, one
that will provide several hours of pleasurable relaxation and diversion
for you and your family.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
This drive in theater is radio active. Now you can
hear tonight's show on your AM car radio. Turn your
ignition key to the accessory position. This will not drain
your car battery. Now turn on your radio and zero
in on the following AM station.

Speaker 1 (00:37):
Drive away your worries and cares at this drive in theater.

Speaker 3 (00:42):
That's why to familiarize you with the movie rating symbols
which will be used by this theater, we present the
following guide for parents and young people X No one
under seventeen admitted.

Speaker 4 (00:55):
The after school special industry was an interesting one. When
you watch movies, like when those directors got a chance
to make real movies, you watch them and you're like, yeah,
that makes sense. That came from somebody who's from the
school of the after school special. But sometimes they just go, no,
we just use that as a stepping stone. I guess

(01:16):
they're kind of like the television equivalent to trauma in
that way.

Speaker 5 (01:19):
Yeah, it's fast. I don't know, it's fascinating because he
made so he made like Devil's Rain and stuff, which,
for whatever, for the fact that it's like not a
exactly a hit or something like that, looks visually like
the guy at least knew what he was doing, you
know what I mean. And he made I think one
of the sequels to The Stepford Wives.

Speaker 4 (01:40):
But I didn't even know there were sequels to that.

Speaker 5 (01:42):
Yeah, I think it's the Revenge of the Stepford Wives
or something like that.

Speaker 4 (01:47):
That sounds like a really intelligent movie.

Speaker 5 (01:51):
And then and then he made Doctor Five's and the
but what's the second one, Doctor Five's Rides Again.

Speaker 6 (01:58):
Or yeah, Rises?

Speaker 5 (02:02):
Say what it is? Rises Again?

Speaker 6 (02:08):
Not as go as the first one.

Speaker 4 (02:10):
Well we'll find out later, Brian, because they're on the list.

Speaker 2 (02:12):
Now.

Speaker 6 (02:13):
That's how this conversation started, gotcha. The first one I
really like. Second one was like, ah, you get her
of Blood? Was like, oh, that should have been a
Doctor Fibes movie.

Speaker 5 (02:26):
I think. I think the funny thing is I think
the one time I went to watch Doctor Fibes, I
accidentally watched God damn it, Doctor uh what is it?
Doctor Goldfoot? In the Bikini Machine or whatever. Somehow back
in the day whenever Hulu first started, and Hulu was

(02:46):
real weird and free. I like, I had typed in
Doctor Fibes and it just started a movie and it's
aid Vincent Price, and I was like, oh sweet, but
it was Doctor Coldfoot, very different movie, but I watched it.

Speaker 6 (03:00):
I have those. I have not watched them.

Speaker 5 (03:03):
Oh they're.

Speaker 6 (03:06):
Bad, so that means you loved them probably. I was
at Walmart once and I saw this pack of DVDs
and I picked it up and it was like four
DVDs and each DVD had two movies on it, and
they were all bits of Price movies and it was
like ten bucks. My fuck, yes I'm buying this. I

(03:27):
mean Doctor Goldfoot movies were on there, but I watched them.

Speaker 5 (03:34):
Oh okay, it's it's one of those movies that watching it,
it's fucked up in your head now. So if you
had seen it first, you would go, oh, what a
silly sixties bikini movie, right, because it was kind of

(03:54):
a thing. But after having seen Austin Powers first, you
should never ever see a parody of a thing before
you see the thing, because then you're just like.

Speaker 6 (04:03):
Jesus christ You know the sequel is Doctor Goldfoot and
the Girl Bombs.

Speaker 5 (04:11):
Yeah, the girl bombs.

Speaker 6 (04:14):
Creating female robots for his nefarious.

Speaker 5 (04:17):
Purpose, sexy sexy fembots. Yeah, all right, all from the
hyper masculine ladies man that is that's surprised.

Speaker 6 (04:36):
Hey, I believe his daughter that says that she believes
he was probably bisexual.

Speaker 5 (04:43):
Yeah, I mean it's his business.

Speaker 6 (04:46):
Oh yeah, No, that just makes me like it even more.
But it's just one of those things where it's just like, yeah,
you think of like masculine men that's surprised when I
jump to the top of my list, would he would
not love him to death? But Christopher Lee, on the

(05:10):
other hand, Yeah.

Speaker 5 (05:12):
Well Christopher Lee also jumps into my head of actors
that might kill you in real life.

Speaker 6 (05:21):
Might at the very least easily could.

Speaker 5 (05:27):
No, No, see I don't I don't mean with motivation.
I mean actors who might literally one night I wake
up in there in my room with a knife to me.
Christopher Lee on that list, possibility he's dead still could happen.

Speaker 6 (05:46):
I guess if he injured you, you would I need
a medical facility of some sort.

Speaker 5 (05:53):
You could have you could have just went with I
might be dead on arrival. Oh yeah, missed that. Miss
that the whole possible segue right there. So clean, it
was so clean and right there for you.

Speaker 4 (06:10):
Right.

Speaker 1 (06:12):
Uh.

Speaker 6 (06:12):
So, apparently I picked movies this week that I thought
had some sort of medical theme to it, which one
of them second one very loosely.

Speaker 4 (06:26):
Listen, the theme is movies where sort of mid range
actors find themselves being poisoned.

Speaker 5 (06:33):
Right.

Speaker 4 (06:36):
Sure turned that the lead in both of these movies
gets poisoned halfway through the movie, so I guess that's
the theme.

Speaker 6 (06:43):
The better theme would have been, wait, stan Lee's in
this movie, but he didn't show up in one of them,
so that was kind of a problem.

Speaker 4 (06:55):
I think it's considered cheating if you make that the
theme and he only shows up in one of the movies.

Speaker 6 (06:59):
Yeah, Doug, do you want to tell us about the ambulance?

Speaker 4 (07:06):
Not really, but I will.

Speaker 5 (07:10):
I need a bamballapse.

Speaker 4 (07:12):
Listen. So the movie is Eric Roberts is sexually harassing
a woman on the street. She collapses and obviously fake
ambulance takes her away. He decides to creepily follow her
to the hospital and they're like, yeah, like she's not here,
and why would we tell you if she was because
you don't even know who she is and she doesn't

(07:32):
know who you are. So then he goes to the
police and they're like, you can't file a missing person's
report for a person you don't know. Meanwhile, by sheer coincidence,
he's right that she's been kidnapped and she is going
to be experimented on so they can cure diabetes and
then murder her whether it works or not.

Speaker 5 (07:51):
That is, in fact to the plot of the movie,
crazy doctor trying to cure diabetes.

Speaker 4 (07:57):
And then yeah, and then so he spends her the
movie running around. At one point he's poisoned. As previously stated,
there's a there's an incident between a gang and the
people who drive the ambulance that I'm sure no one enjoyed.
That's yeah, that's the plot of the movie.

Speaker 5 (08:19):
You know, you guys know what I forget every fucking
time that Eric Roberts is actually a pretty good actor.

Speaker 4 (08:25):
See I'm not listen, I'm not saying his performance in
this movie is amazing or anything like that.

Speaker 5 (08:31):
Okay, but he really he really is, like just genuinely
he's a good actor. But his career would say otherwise.

Speaker 4 (08:39):
Here's the thing about him, is that having his name
in the movie got my hopes up a little bit
for the movie, because he is a good actor, but
his performance is particularly bad in this movie, and for
some reason, they gave him the what if Billy ray
Cyrus went to business school haircut that I just couldn't
see past. And I'm like, I was out of this movie,

(09:03):
Like by the time that girl it's taken away in
the ambulance, which is the inciting incident of the movie,
I'm already like I don't want to be watching this
at all, Like just so, And it's because of Eric
Roberts's appearance and performance.

Speaker 5 (09:17):
So both both movies do the same thing too. What
was it with like this weird period of time where
it was stylish to wear a suit that does not fit?

Speaker 4 (09:28):
I does anybody remember that happening in real life, because
it happens in a lot of the movies from this era.
But I don't know. Maybe I think maybe I was
too young to notice that people's suits didn't fit or
something at the time. I don't I have trouble believing
that people were just walking around dressed like this.

Speaker 6 (09:45):
Supposedly it was a thing. I don't know.

Speaker 4 (09:48):
Anyways, what are your guys's initial impressions of.

Speaker 6 (09:52):
Well, this movie when you brought up to the secondary
theme supposedly or turns out to be the main theme,
is that people get poisoned. Yeah, I didn't even think
I realized it because I fell asleep during this movie twice.

Speaker 4 (10:07):
Me too, actually, And guess what, I did not rewind
it and rewatch the parts I slept through because I
was enjoying it enough.

Speaker 5 (10:17):
See, I don't get me wrong, it's not a good movie.
But just so we're clear, Yeah, you just we're clear.
I don't want anybody thinking I'm getting ready to like
go to bat for this movie and be like, no,
it's great. But I had genuinely enough fun watching this
movie that I think I was entertained the entire time. Now,

(10:38):
part of.

Speaker 4 (10:39):
That that was so can we just can we go
before you move on? Yeah, the way that you reached
to justify the existence of this movie with that sentence,
I think that I almost had enough fun to genuinely
say that I might have kind of enjoyed myself a
little well, watching movie.

Speaker 5 (10:56):
Like correct, this movie requires hedging.

Speaker 6 (11:01):
Far enough edging or edging they're both different.

Speaker 5 (11:05):
Well, well it's Eric Roberts, so mostly edging. And do
you guys think is this the movie where he was
type cast as a dangerous sexual predator for the rest
of his career, because God damn it, he always takes that.

Speaker 6 (11:24):
Way, does not take no for an answer, that is
for sure.

Speaker 5 (11:27):
Yeah, Jesus Jesus Christ.

Speaker 6 (11:30):
We try to pass it off. Is oh, come on,
look at him. He's a quirky guy. Doesn't give up.
That was the thing back then.

Speaker 4 (11:38):
But I think they would give up. He just should have.
He should have given up at some point. It was
way too far.

Speaker 1 (11:44):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (11:45):
I think they were going for like a bankman level
of sexual predator and ended up with an Eric Roberts.

Speaker 4 (11:56):
And that's yeah, that I think that's a reasonable statement.
I think, like it's not because he's not like a
rapist in this movie. He's just a sexual predator, you know.
And if if you had a villain behaving this way,
that would be like, Okay, you can have a villain
behave this way in a movie, and then the good
guy is the guy that steps in and punches him
and gets to meet the girl, you know what I mean.

(12:17):
But you can't have your hero acting this way in
the opening of the movie.

Speaker 5 (12:21):
Yeah, I'm and I'm assuming because you guys are bored
and clearly did not enjoy this movie that you did
not get on IMDb to find out more about this movie.

Speaker 4 (12:29):
Oh no, that's the problem I did.

Speaker 5 (12:32):
I was gonna say, there is what fucking world is it?
Where this could have been John Travolta and Jamie Lee
fucking Curtis or what the fuck?

Speaker 6 (12:44):
You gotta remember in nineteen ninety both of them were
really down on their luck at that point.

Speaker 4 (12:50):
Well, Jimmy the Curtis was doing good work. She just
wasn't maybe in a list movies. John Travolta was outcast
from the world. But they also wanted Jim Carrey in
the lead of this movie at one point.

Speaker 5 (13:03):
Well I think it just said he auditioned.

Speaker 4 (13:07):
Could you imagine, like if you put Jim Carrey in
this role and he just did what he was doing
in the early nineties, Oh my god, Like then then
you'd have a movie, right, Like Jim Carrey could follow
that woman Street that is such a.

Speaker 5 (13:23):
Disturbingly different movie.

Speaker 6 (13:24):
It's just like talking out of his ass.

Speaker 5 (13:26):
Do you want to go fuck?

Speaker 4 (13:28):
Alright? Imagine imagine if we had archival footage of Jim
Carrey playing a marveled artist getting yelled at by stan
Lee for not turning in his pages, oh my god,
it'd be so good like and that's and that made
me like the whole time is in whenever like because
the movie is weird tonal shifts. It's a whole separate problem.

(13:48):
But when it kicks into cartoon mode, if you could
have had Jim Carrey instead of Eric Roberts to play
your cartoon character, you know what I mean. There's a
scene in this movie. Yeah, is this just supposed to be?

Speaker 5 (13:59):
Is this to be a comedy?

Speaker 6 (14:01):
I don't know.

Speaker 5 (14:01):
I I genuinely, I don't know.

Speaker 4 (14:05):
I tell I think genuinely. The problem is that you
have a story which should be a thriller slash mystery,
with a director who wants to make a comedy, with
a star who's like, oh great, I have a chance
to do a comedy who can't do comedy.

Speaker 5 (14:22):
You know, I was gonna say, do you do you think?
Because I feel like this script is the script of
a comedy movie.

Speaker 4 (14:30):
See, I think there's potential for that movie there in
the script, because like there is there's a scene in
this movie where he slides out the back of the
ambulance on the stretcher and he's tied to it, and
it's like going down the street like something out of
a fucking cartoon. Like yeah, like again, I was put
Jim Carrey on that stretcher. That's probably really funny.

Speaker 5 (14:50):
Well, well, I was gonna say, And we gotta remember
the plot of this movie is a doctor who's abducting
people in an old Ghostbusters fucking ambulance trying to cure diabetes. Yes, like,
and that's got to be a comedy, right, it's got
it ought to be.

Speaker 6 (15:09):
Well, the problem is the movie is written and directed
by Larry Cohen, who can do a pretty decent job
but of writing something that on one hand is a
little darkly humorous but then on the other hand has
frightening moments. But I think for this specific movie, it

(15:33):
did not sell well together.

Speaker 4 (15:35):
It's yeah, the problem is you've got like it sets
itself up as a thriller, like you needed comedy in
those opening scenes to let us know that this was
a comedy film, you know what I mean?

Speaker 5 (15:48):
It's was it so was it so close to the
eighties that they thought that sexually harassing a woman was comedy.

Speaker 4 (15:55):
Maybe maybe again, I keep going back and again, Jim Carrey.

Speaker 5 (16:01):
It works in most eighties movies. It just doesn't work once.
Eric Roberts, Yeah, he's too he's too convincing a sexual preser.

Speaker 6 (16:10):
Well, I don't know, Like Clarry Cohen made like The Stuff,
which is generally a goofy movie, right, but there's still
some shit in there that's like, Oh, that's kind of terrifying.
I think about it too much.

Speaker 4 (16:23):
And if this was totally the same as The Stuff,
it would probably be a good movie. Like there's potential there,
you know what I mean. And that's I think that's
where it's like hard for me to sit through a
movie like this is like where I can see the
potential for a good movie, like it just tooks some
tweaks and some different casting and stuff. But with this,

(16:43):
it's like it's just not working from minute one and
you're just like, oh God, there's an hour and a
half of this coming up.

Speaker 3 (16:50):
Uh.

Speaker 5 (16:51):
I will say this, the absolute best part of this
movie is the reporter, the fucking the old man. He
is the best part the whole fucking movie. And that actor.
Crazily enough, I recognize because my wife watches a lot
of Golden Girls and he played a Buzz Rose's boyfriend
for quite a bit of time.

Speaker 4 (17:17):
I mean, you get the Golden Girls supporting cast on here,
you think you're gonna make yourself a good movie, but
sometimes it just doesn't work out.

Speaker 5 (17:25):
I mean he does, Like, so that guy has a
lot of like the best just the best moments of
the movie whatever. They're trying to abduct him from a
hospital and he like comes out and basically just fucks
up all their plans by just being an asshole. And
then toward the end of the movie where they're confronting
everyone in the nightclub.

Speaker 7 (17:46):
Hospital where the diabetes thing is happening, he fucking he
fucking saves the day by throwing.

Speaker 5 (17:54):
His pists on that guy and then hitting him with
his bed pant, which like that that's that's genuinely, it's fantastic.
If this movie was more of that, this would be
a great movie.

Speaker 4 (18:06):
I think, Yeah, I think. And that's where the problem
comes is by the time that stuff is happening, I'm
completely checked out. And you know, like, comedy doesn't work
if you're not into it.

Speaker 5 (18:15):
You know what comedy doesn't work. If your stars a properts.

Speaker 4 (18:19):
Yeah, I don't have any counterpoint to that. Like it,
you don't, You can't. The movie had to be funny
the whole time if it wanted me to be laughing
at those points.

Speaker 6 (18:34):
That guy was never on an episode of Golden Girls,
by the way, I.

Speaker 5 (18:38):
Swear to god he was. That's not him.

Speaker 4 (18:43):
He's a winner, isn't he.

Speaker 6 (18:46):
I don't know it could be. He was in Pete's Dragon. Yeah,
that's the Poseidon Adventures Pets. Dragon's delightful too.

Speaker 4 (18:53):
I love people Dragon when I was a kid. Haven't
seen it in years.

Speaker 6 (18:56):
He's on an episode of Roseanne The Cosby Show, which
I'm sure love to talk about until his dying day,
and was also on three different episodes of Fantasy Island
playing three different characters.

Speaker 4 (19:10):
So he was on every time the show in the
eighties except the one now I think he was so what.

Speaker 6 (19:15):
Three different episodes of The Love Boat playing three different characters.

Speaker 5 (19:18):
What you're saying is he had the best career ever.
That sounds amazing.

Speaker 6 (19:27):
He was in the Wonder Woman.

Speaker 5 (19:29):
But anyway, let's let's talk more about him throwing his
piss on that guy, because that was so good.

Speaker 6 (19:34):
It was good.

Speaker 4 (19:35):
It's like it's it's disappointing because I feel like if
I had watched that clip on YouTube, I would have
really enjoyed it. But because it was after all of
the Eric Roberts stuff, I was just like, nah, whatever,
I'm like, I'm half awake, just you know, refusing to
go to bed because I don't want to have to
turn this movie back on in the morning kind of thing.

Speaker 5 (19:55):
Yeah, I don't know, Yeah, it was. It was a
whole thing because by that once he started hanging out
with that guy, with the stuff that was going on,
I was like, oh, so this this is a comedy, right,
but Eric Roberts still isn't. I don't think Eric Roberts
is trying to be funny. I don't think he's trying
and failing. I think that I don't know. I just

(20:15):
don't understand what the fuck is happening.

Speaker 4 (20:18):
So if he's not trying and failing to be in
a comedy, what do you think he's failing it? Uh,
not being sexual predator because he's failing at whatever he's doing.
I was giving him the benefit of the doubt that
he knew he was in a comedy, and that's what
he was failing it.

Speaker 6 (20:34):
You don't want to trying to be in more of
like a siller, But the tone of the of the
different segments is what's throwing him off.

Speaker 7 (20:45):
Well, maybe I do feel I think the Ghostbuster's reference
is apt because I feel like he's trying to do
that Bill Murray thing where Bill Murray can be funny
just by being charming but doing things at the same time,
you know what I mean.

Speaker 5 (21:06):
And I think Eric Roberts just can't do that because
he's not Bill Murray.

Speaker 1 (21:09):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (21:09):
I mean, that's a that's a charisma thing that it's
not about how you do your performances about who you
are as a person, right, And you can't you can't
create that. You can't do what those guys do. I mean,
very few guys have been able to pull that off
in history, have that level of charisma to be the
Bill Murray thing.

Speaker 6 (21:30):
Yeah. But and Eric Roberts is no Bill Murray. No.

Speaker 4 (21:34):
It's again I kind of feel bad because I don't
hate Eric Roberts, but I hate him in this movie
and I just like, I can't he can do so
much And if they were making a thriller, which this
is what you when you told us about this movie, Brian,
you said it was a thriller, and I was like.

Speaker 6 (21:51):
I thought only from having seen a trailer.

Speaker 4 (21:55):
But like had had this been a thriller where he
was where he was un spooling a mystery about what
happened to this woman that he met, and he you know, yeah, okay,
maybe Eric Roberts is good casting in that role. But
as soon as you as soon as as soon as
you give him that aircut and have him interacting with
stan Lee somewhere along the line, You're like, this, how

(22:17):
do you not know not to like to cast some
then you're in comedy and just put him in the
fucking comedy.

Speaker 5 (22:23):
I just like, we can't overstate this. Eric Roberts, who
genuinely is an an attractive man, like he just sees
a good looking guy, yes, but they take him, give
him a feathered fucking mullet's and put him in a
suit that's three sizes too big with shoulder pads like.

Speaker 4 (22:44):
The colorful ties, like colorful ties.

Speaker 5 (22:46):
Yeah. I mean it's like he said, what the what
the fuck is the weird music video that came out
like several years ago that has the dudes in the
giant triangular suits dancing in the Weird Room. That's what
this movie looks like. That is the aesthetic of his
clothing choices weird music video.

Speaker 6 (23:06):
I expected him to open up the suit jacket and
he'd be wearing like the like the rainbow suspenders.

Speaker 5 (23:15):
It's something I don't know. Like I said, it's just bizarre.

Speaker 4 (23:19):
It reminds me of when Jim Carrey is wearing that
big yellowy suit in the Mask, except yes, that's supposed
to be funny that he's dressed like that, and this
is supposed to be not well.

Speaker 5 (23:31):
And it's supposed to be it's the way that cartoon
character is drawn, like with a crazy triangular suit. Yeah,
but again, if this is supposed to be a cartoon,
why are only some people in a cartoon?

Speaker 4 (23:48):
That's and and there's your problem. I think the problem
is that this movie doesn't know what it wants to be.
And so all these things we're saying with like nitpicking
an outfit or a haircut or Eric Roberts's existence is all.
It all comes down to the fact that all of
these things can work in different movies, but this movie
doesn't know which one of them it wants to be.

Speaker 5 (24:10):
Exactly if this is Eric roberts sexually harassing Shannon Tweed.
Sure it's a good movie. It's on Cinemac, not God,
watch it all day.

Speaker 4 (24:21):
That probably exists the same if anyone wants to google.

Speaker 5 (24:24):
That, that one probably has. It has to exist. There's
zero chance that that movie is a movie.

Speaker 4 (24:30):
But I mean, like, yeah, like, I don't know. You
could have almost separated this, taken this concept and separated
it and made a comedy film and a thriller film.
But you can't make a comedy thriller. That's not a thing.
Like it's.

Speaker 5 (24:44):
We've been to genres.

Speaker 4 (24:48):
Yeah, I don't know. This movie is just just yeah,
like I say, lost me real early, and I'm like.

Speaker 6 (24:56):
The funny thing is I typed in air. Robertson started
typing in jan and Tweed into Google and it so
even if they're not in a movie together, people have
wonder google things.

Speaker 1 (25:11):
He should be.

Speaker 5 (25:12):
Even if they have not, people have fantasized.

Speaker 4 (25:20):
Anyways.

Speaker 6 (25:21):
It also doesn't help that the villain in this is
like a long time like soap opera actor. I know,
so I feel like his like it's kind of twirling
his mustache a little bit with that soap opera.

Speaker 4 (25:36):
Whatever soap opera he was on, was sometimes on when
I would walk from elementary school to my grandparents' house
after school when my parents couldn't pick me up, and
that's what my grandmother would be there watching, and we
had to wait for it to be over before we
could switch it onto our shows. And it's like his
performance is exactly what I remember from that show. I

(25:57):
don't even I don't know what the show is called,
or his character or anything, but I remember his face
and that mustache, Like you know, that mustache is unmistakable.
It's probably the like it's the television equivalent, like a
Stacy Keach mustache. Everyone knows it's not Let's not be ridiculous.

Speaker 6 (26:14):
Let's not that's not.

Speaker 4 (26:16):
That I thought. I thought Tom Atkins, and then I
scaled it back to Stacy key Jumper, like.

Speaker 6 (26:20):
Look, we'll give him Keach, but we're not going full
Atkins on this mustache.

Speaker 4 (26:25):
Right, But I feel I feel like that's something where
like he was people movie because he's known for it,
you know what I mean.

Speaker 5 (26:32):
People appreciate Tom Madkins's mustache. People tolerate Stacy.

Speaker 6 (26:38):
Keach, all right, Yeah, so his sort of like like
almost twirling his mustache. Acting in this does not sort
of help the cause any from what we're talking about
of it either deciding to be a thriller and or
a comedy of some sort.

Speaker 5 (26:57):
Yeah, well, but and again, if it is a comedy,
his mustache rolling would work right, Like it'd be okay,
It would be okay.

Speaker 4 (27:06):
But if you wanted to make this a good movie,
he should be turning it up a notch or two
because he's doing the same he's having the same problem
the rest of the movie is having where he's playing
it just serious enough where you aren't sure if this
is meant to be funny but not and not serious
enough that you're sure. So you're on this again on
this balancing line, like am I supposed to be intimidated

(27:28):
by this guy? Or am I supposed to be laughing
with him? And I don't to this day, I don't
know what he was going for, so they to.

Speaker 5 (27:37):
This day, like you watched it eight years ago.

Speaker 4 (27:39):
I watched it last night. I watched most of it
last night when I wasn't falling asleep in front of TV.

Speaker 5 (27:47):
You're like, Tim expanded the dilation destroyed me.

Speaker 4 (27:51):
Well, yeah, I guess what starting tomorrow, I'm not going
to be thinking about this movie ever again. So this
is the time I have to figure out what he
was going for.

Speaker 6 (28:01):
Yeah, I'm really bummed because, like I said, I saw
a trailer. I don't know, it's probably been fifteen twenty
years ago, Okay, it was like, oh, well, that's kind
of a movie. You know, It's like a movie I've
never heard of before. And I'm like, oh, the Ambulance,
some girl goes missing, all right, Like I would watch
this and then just sort of put it in the
back of my mind. And then you know, I was

(28:23):
just sitting here thinking of movies and I'm like, oh shit,
look up the Ambulance, And so then watching it, I'm
just like, oh, this is disappointing. Is not what I
wanted it all?

Speaker 5 (28:34):
Well, Like this movie, there was a bunch of parts
of it that I I was so confused and just
trying to figure out what the fuck was going on.
Like every time the ambulance opens and it's those green lights,
I was like, is it supernatural? Is this gonna be
one of those movies where at the end of the movie,
this is all a dream what it's happening?

Speaker 4 (28:57):
Like, Yeah, I know. I was like, does it double
as like a volunteer firefighter and it needs green lights
as well? You know, I was lost, and I'm like
and I just realized I didn't care.

Speaker 5 (29:10):
Yeah, I don't know. There's like along with the tonal problems,
there's like a problem of style like this it doesn't
have any consistency in the look of the film.

Speaker 4 (29:24):
Correct. Yeah, it's hard to explain why that is, but
I agree with what you're saying where it does feel
like like when they're in the Marvel offices, it just
feels like a normal office, right, And when they're in
the when they're in like the police station, it looks
like a police station. But when they're in that hospital area,
you're like, is this like set in the future. What's

(29:44):
going on? Like why is this post apocalyptic? It's completely different.
And like again just having that ambulance driving around and
picking people up and everyone's acting like it's normal, and
it's like, but that's not an ambulance that would have
been in service in nineteen ninety you know what I mean.
It looks like acdot one.

Speaker 5 (30:02):
Yeah, yeah, but I.

Speaker 6 (30:03):
Think that's that's what's supposed to throw Like give it
the odd feeling because again.

Speaker 4 (30:11):
Like maybe in a thriller you'd have somebody saying, wait
a minute, that ambulance doesn't look right. But I don't know.

Speaker 6 (30:19):
Uh no, you may know more than the rest of us.
But the Marvel offices, I feel like it looks like
they're in a classroom. All the deaths are set up.

Speaker 5 (30:32):
I so, do you feel like that would be accurate
or would be more of like a cubicle setting. Well,
one of the things is that I in which this
might be a false memory or something, but I think
I remember seeing younger like pictures of Stanley at Marvel,
and did it looking shockingly like that? I almost was

(30:55):
like it. I was like, is that actually Marvel's offices?
Did they actually shoot this movie in Marvel Comics?

Speaker 4 (31:02):
It's weird. It felt right to me because they have
the way they have like their big like desk set
up for drawing on right, Like they're not like it's
not like a cubical environment where you're sitting down like
typing into a computer. You need to be up and
moving and drawing. And because they draw on those like
bigger boards and then so magically turn them and shrink
them down to fit into side a book. I don't

(31:23):
know how. Yeah, I don't know how printing works.

Speaker 5 (31:25):
By the way, I don't know. Well, I was reading.
And it'supposedly one of the reasons why stan Ley's in
this movie is Larry Cohen had actually written a Doctor
Strange movie that got made and never got made, right, uh,
and so they just became pals over that somehow, whatever
you will.

Speaker 6 (31:45):
But he's like, hey, stand I'm gonna make this guy
a cartoonist.

Speaker 5 (31:48):
Yeah, yeah, which is which is kind of cool.

Speaker 4 (31:51):
It's like, all right, it's kind of a fun little
story and it's it's interesting to my knowledge, this is
Stanley's first appearance in a movie.

Speaker 6 (32:00):
That's what it says on IMDb.

Speaker 4 (32:01):
Yeah, so it's like it's kind of fun that, you know,
I we all know that Stanley wanted to be on
camera his whole life, you know what I mean, And
so it's kind of fun to see his first appearance
and to see him actually playing himself and getting lines
of dialogue and everything, you know what I mean.

Speaker 5 (32:17):
And he didn't even shout excelsior a single time.

Speaker 4 (32:19):
No, He's I like that he's playing kind of like
I think stan Lee probably got a kick out of
playing like kind of a hard ass boss who's like,
you didn't get your pages in, and he has like
what is the line of dialogue where he's like, I
got a girl in the hospital and he says something
like I prefer healthy myself, but whatever you want to do,
go ahead like this, and it just like, like, you know,
if it wasn't stan Lee making that line, I'd probably

(32:41):
be like, it's not a great written line. But I'm
in my head, I'm thinking I love Stanley, and I
know he loved saying that, so I'm.

Speaker 5 (32:49):
Like, well, And there's a really interesting moment in this
movie where I know, I feel Cohen must have actually
known a little bit about comic books, because Eric Roberts
is talking to somebody at one point and they're like, oh, yeah,
I recognize your art style or something like that, and
they say something about the speech bubbles and he goes, no,

(33:09):
I don't do no, yes, I just do the pictures.
You're talking about the fucking the Marvel method or whatever
with you know, the artist writers. I was like, wow,
that's like a direct reference to that.

Speaker 4 (33:23):
That probably no one would have gotten back then. Either
a few people.

Speaker 6 (33:27):
Yeah, I'm sure him and Stanley had talked about it
when they were working on Yeah, Doctor Strange shit. Funny
thing is so we've been sitting here talking about the
dude that was from soap operas. We've been talking about
Eric Roberts, talked about Stanley. We're already almost done with
this review. We have not once mentioned that James Earl
Jones is almost completely got. I was looking at the IMDb.

Speaker 5 (33:53):
Here's the thing that I forget sometimes, so James Earl
Jones very good actor most of the time, but occasionally
he's in a movie where he does weird shit and
just thune stuff in and that feels like what he's
doing in this movie because it is. And again, if
this is a comedy, I more get what he's going
for his his dying while chewing gum scene, I was like,

(34:17):
what the it's so fucking weird, right, And I was like,
I get it. If this is supposed to be a comedy,
this is supposed to be almost like some kind of
dark mime act that's happening right now. But it's not good.
It's bad because the rest of the movie is bad.

(34:38):
So this is not You have not firmly established we
are in a comedy, So him chewing gum while bleeding
to death from his multiple wounds.

Speaker 4 (34:49):
I think I slipt through that scene, Thank God, So yes,
could I like, can I point out like when when
Eric Roberts is trying to file a missing person's report,
he doesn't know the girl's name, so he draws a
picture of her and he brings in and it's like
on giant like bristol board, right, and he brings that

(35:09):
into the police and like, this is the woman that's missing.
I don't know her name, and James Earl Jones is
like making fun of him, saying like it looks like
Veronica from Archie or whatever. Yeah, that's another one of
those moments where I'm like, if if I'd found that
clip on YouTube, I'd probably think it was funny if
it wasn't in the context of the movie. Like the
idea of walking in with this giant bristol board that

(35:30):
you've hand drawn and being like, can this woman's missing?
Can you guys find this one? Like it ranks right
up there with an Airheads where they're using the glamour
shot to go and find the girl in the bar.
It's like it's absurd and it could be very funny.

Speaker 6 (35:45):
But I almost like if I saw if I was
watching the original Naked Gun. Yeah, and there's somewhere where
they're describing someone and they're like, uh, you'll know her name,
and Leslie Nielsen just turned and there was a dude
sitting at one of those drawing desks just off screen
and just grabbed the drawing from him and was like

(36:06):
held it up like I'm like, yeah, that tracks. Yeah,
but this dude just walking in with it and be
like this is what she looks like.

Speaker 4 (36:13):
Again. It's the problem is this movie doesn't know what
it wants to be. Because in a comedy, like in
a slapstick comedy, that's a good joke, But in something
that's trying to walk the line between like having like
a little humor but also being a thriller or a mystery,
it's like no, no, like you can't. It's you can't
have that level of joke in a movie that wants

(36:35):
to be taken seriously.

Speaker 5 (36:36):
In other moments, well, and they even they played that forward,
so I don't know if you guys slept through this.
But then he goes out on the street, no, I
saw it, yeah, and it says he's added, have you
seen this woman this big poster board drawing that in
no way would any person recognize that human being from

(36:59):
that drawing?

Speaker 4 (37:00):
Yeah, so is that a joke? Is that a joke? No,
I don't know.

Speaker 5 (37:05):
No one knows.

Speaker 4 (37:08):
I feel like we ought to know. We all watched
the movie. At least one of us shouldn't know if
the thing is a joke or not.

Speaker 5 (37:14):
Again, I didn't. My My question forever is going to
be is this a comedy? Like I want to write,
like Eric Roberts a letter and be like, was that
a comedy? Were you being funny?

Speaker 4 (37:28):
You to do that with like a pen and paper
and mail that to his home address.

Speaker 6 (37:33):
I did see.

Speaker 5 (37:33):
I'm a little nervous.

Speaker 6 (37:35):
It'll probably be at a convention soon, so you can
probably just walk up and ask him.

Speaker 5 (37:39):
No, I feel like I feel like that's just asking
for me to get sexually harassed by.

Speaker 6 (37:48):
But hey, you're one degree away from Julia Roberts.

Speaker 5 (37:50):
So that works, right, you know what? That's true? The
dangerous worth.

Speaker 6 (37:55):
I feel like I feel like Larry Cohen thought I'm
gonna make this dude's like superpower, the fact that he's
an artist, and so he does this. But then it
just comes off goofy and they don't really do anything
like interesting with that stuff later. Yeah, I remember.

Speaker 5 (38:12):
I think part of the part of his character being
such a ridiculous caricature of like a comic book artist
is supposed to be the justification of why nobody will
like listen to him, you know what I mean, where
it's like if people were missing, there's a bunch of
dead people and they're like, shut up, be a fucking
weirdo with your ill fitting funny books. Look at your

(38:34):
stupid fucking gut, Now leave me alone while I chew
gum angrily.

Speaker 4 (38:40):
Yeah, maybe that's what it was. I don't know.

Speaker 6 (38:45):
Weirdly, they did make a movie where this guy has
has that sort of power that I don't know if
you guys remember the movie The Sketch Artist Jeff Fahy.
I think it was like a direct to Showtime movie
Back in the Back in like two years after this
movie in nineteen ninety two. He's like a sketch artist

(39:06):
for a police and he gets like super involved with
this case or whatever, you know, somebody that's missing.

Speaker 5 (39:14):
Or I feel like okay, so so occasionally the reason
why those similar things happen is because you know, people
are shopping treatments around Hollywood and somebody just goes, yeah,
I'm stealing that. But sometimes I think what happens is
I think a pile of shit comes out and somebody's like,
challenge accepted. I'm going to do the same thing and

(39:34):
try to make it not suck, and that's possible, and
most of the time they fail.

Speaker 6 (39:42):
Yeah, I don't know, because again, this movie was not good.
I'm very disappointed.

Speaker 4 (39:47):
I'm disappointed in you for making us a watch of
print that's track.

Speaker 5 (39:52):
Listen, this is a weird pile of shit. I'm glad
I watched it because it's a weird pile of shit.

Speaker 4 (39:57):
It's surprising. Oh, also, I don't recommend this movie. Answer.

Speaker 6 (40:06):
Also, speaking of pilots of ship, no, do you want
to tell us about the o A.

Speaker 5 (40:11):
Yeah, so this weird pile of ship.

Speaker 4 (40:15):
I didn't just pick stup off the list last week, Brian.

Speaker 5 (40:22):
So, so we've got uh the good old Quaid who is.

Speaker 6 (40:28):
He's were on the list by the way, Doug, don't
be getting all salty hem there.

Speaker 5 (40:32):
Then he is a college professor, uh in the English
department who at one point apparently was a successful novelist
who has not written anything in a little while. We
find out he's going through a divorce, he's being.

Speaker 6 (40:52):
From Malcolm's mother, from from Malcolm's mom.

Speaker 5 (40:57):
He is being sexually harassed by one of his female students.
He's just being generally harassed by one of his male
students who wants him to read his novel. And Dennis
Quade's characters kind of a kind of a piece of shit,
Like it's just kind of his general vibe. He's one
of those people who kind of like had it at

(41:18):
one point and then it kind of went away, and
now he's bitter and he's just kind of a dick
in which again Quaid better actor than Eric Roberts.

Speaker 4 (41:29):
But better cast in his role as well.

Speaker 5 (41:32):
Yeah, better cast in his role, but again the performance
more of a disappointment for performance in this movie. Strange.
I don't listen. This movie had decisions. Lots of decisions
were made.

Speaker 4 (41:44):
So this movie is a remake of like a fifties movie,
and I think they were trying to be really clever
with the filmmaking style and having them act a certain way,
and obviously the way it shot, like they use all
sorts of weird like Dutch angles and stuff, and you're like, okay,
I get it. And like the opening of the movie
and the ending of the movie are in black and
white so that you'll remember that it's a remake of

(42:05):
a black and white movie. And it's like all of
that was a mistake, including telling Dennis Quaid dak this way,
like just have them be fucking normal.

Speaker 5 (42:14):
Yeah, So the basic plot is all that's going on.
And then after a night of heavy drinking, he wakes up,
he feels sick, He goes to the doctor and finds
out he's been poisoned and has twenty four hours to live. Yeah,
and then he sets about trying to solve his own murder. Meanwhile,
every human being he comes in contact with diyes. He

(42:39):
lives out his last twenty four hours as anyone should.
Solving your own murder. Fucking one of your students and
killing some people works out, works out pretty well, sure.
And that plus there's Byron James, And I know.

Speaker 6 (42:58):
I got excited when his name was and then I
was like, oh, he's in it for like two.

Speaker 5 (43:02):
Minutes and and fucking god, damn it, Meg Meg Ryan,
thank you, you know her. Well, I was trying to
look No, I was trying to say Meg Foster, and
I'm like, that's not her fucking name, you asshole. Uh yeah,
but Meg Ryan, like I think before Meg Ryan, like
anybody knew who the fuck she was.

Speaker 4 (43:22):
She was up and coming, like she'd been stuff before this.

Speaker 6 (43:25):
But she was in the doors. And actually her and
Quade did Innerspace right before this movie. Okay, and we
started dating while they were making this movie.

Speaker 5 (43:34):
Hey, weird, weird thing to have said about anything in
your career. But Interspace is a better movie than this.

Speaker 8 (43:41):
Uh.

Speaker 5 (43:42):
But he's also playing at the normal theater next week.
But yeah, there's there's stuff in this that's all right,
him like glueing his hand to the girl and like
that old stuff. It's like, all right, that's that's cool.
And then some of the stuff that happens with people
dying is vaguely.

Speaker 4 (43:59):
Interesting that deaths themselves are interesting.

Speaker 5 (44:03):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (44:04):
The problem is that the mystery they play the mystery
out like this is a Giallo like they set up
like a, oh, maybe it was this person that did it. Nope,
then maybe it was this person that did it. Nope,
Then maybe it was this person that did drunk. Yeah, nope, nope,
and then at the end it's like, oh, this is
who did it, and there's no possible way you could

(44:25):
have guessed that because we're giving you all of this
information in the last two minutes of the movie and
it's like all right, like that's that's not a mystery.
Then there's there was no way.

Speaker 5 (44:35):
Well, although the although the funny thing is is I
immediately was like, well it's that character.

Speaker 6 (44:40):
Yeah, as was I and not because like it was
easily spelled out in the movie, but just because my
movie brain was like, well, it's going.

Speaker 4 (44:48):
To well because some of the red herrings are like
they're like the one guy is mad at him over
a promotion, and then you get this big moment where
Dennis Glade storms into his house and tries to beat
him up in front of his family, and then it
turns out it wasn't him, and it's like it was
never going to be the fucking guy who's mad at
him over the promotion. Jenny was never going to be
that guy. Why was that in there other than to

(45:09):
make this movie long enough to release kind of thing
because he's that guy?

Speaker 5 (45:14):
Uh yeah, but no, I mean the second fucking sticky Bandit, Uh,
the wet Bandit. It depends on which one Sticky band
It's part two. Uh. Like he has like four lines

(45:35):
in the opening scenes of the movie, and they're setting
up the fact that he now has a book deal,
and he only has a book deal because that writer
helped him. There is the setup of oh, that kid
clearly is a pretty brilliant writer and has written this
novel and then immediately dies. And I don't know, it's

(45:56):
just like, it's that guy. It's that guy, and he
wants the book like it's it's not subtle, it's right there.
Like I was like, that's it's almost silly that they
pretend that there's a mystery.

Speaker 4 (46:06):
Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 6 (46:06):
I think people were like watching this movie and you'd
be like, I wonder if it's the guy that sounds
like the voice from the Wonder Ears.

Speaker 5 (46:16):
They're like, everyone's going, it's clearly the bad guy from
Home Alone, Like it's kind that will come out in.

Speaker 4 (46:22):
Two years, that's the bad guy from the movie that's
coming out in two years. Starting the guy.

Speaker 5 (46:26):
Fine, Fine, it's the guy from chud.

Speaker 6 (46:32):
No.

Speaker 4 (46:33):
It's yeah, Like I think that's where the movie, like
a lot of stylistic stuff aside. A lot of where
the movie lost me was just the whole middle part
of like nothing they're doing has like anything to do
with the mystery, and it's so obvious that these red
herrings are not going to be the guy who did
you know what I mean? And a lot of the
ship was just like I don't know, like so like

(46:53):
the kid who wrote the book was also having an
affair with Dennis Quad's way for not really an affair
because they were most divorced, but he was in a
relationship with her wife, and.

Speaker 5 (47:05):
In a relationship with his wife and with his own
sister because he didn't know was his sister because his
adopted mom, who's his real mom, never told him that
she's his mom.

Speaker 4 (47:15):
Yeah, and who cares about any of that stuff, like
the whole Like there's a whole backstory about that kid
who's his biological father and his step and his him
and his father were abandoned by his mom, who then
went and married a rich guy.

Speaker 5 (47:37):
And then when he was also a piece of shit.

Speaker 4 (47:40):
So when the dad came looking to get some money
to not to like not expose that she had abandoned
her previous family, she murdered the dad and the new husband,
and then got her chauffeur on board for it, and
then adopted her own son to pay her own son.
They're not really adopted, but was paying her own son's
way through college. But none of that's relevant to the

(48:01):
murder mystery that we're dealing with. That's just a side
thing that's going on. Well, who gives a shit.

Speaker 5 (48:07):
I think the the apt comparison was Jollo. This is
like somebody saw all those fucking goddamn Italian movies from
the seventies that are murder mysteries where there is no plot.
There's no plot, there's no mystery, there's no clues. It's
just somebody going, ah, but maybe it's this guy, and

(48:31):
it's like, oh, nope, that person's dead too, but maybe
it's this guy.

Speaker 4 (48:36):
Yeah, but there's a charm to those that does not
exist here.

Speaker 5 (48:41):
Well, yeah, this movie doesn't have as much incest. I mean,
there is the relationship between the brother and sister, but
it's not on camera, so it really doesn't rise to
that Italian level.

Speaker 4 (48:52):
If we're gonna if we're gonna talk about inappropriate sexual
relationships in this movie, we should probably talk about the
professor banging a student, and I've never seen Hollywood make
this mistake before. So they have this whole thing where
he doesn't want to sleep with her because of how
young she is, but they went and hired an actress

(49:14):
who's too old for the part. Since when does a
Hollywood movie fuck up and hire an actress who's too
old for the part. So you end up with this
girl in her late twenties and a college professor in
his early thirties going I couldn't sleep with her or
she's way too young, and it's like, you're fucking an
actual couple in real life. You're not that far apart

(49:34):
in age and she's not that young. Well, but it's not.

Speaker 5 (49:38):
He I do believe the exact thing that he says
in the movie isn't that she's too young. He basically says,
you are my student, and that is illegal if I
have sex. No.

Speaker 1 (49:48):
No.

Speaker 6 (49:49):
There's a point where he wakes up too. He's like, oh,
I'm going to go to jail, and she's like, no, no,
I'm over eighteen.

Speaker 4 (49:55):
Yeah yeah, And then he says the fact that you
have to say that makes this wrong, Like he's first
of all, she doesn't look eighteen, she looks like twenty seven,
which is probably how old she was, right. And then
second of all, it's like the idea that he would
be looking at her and going, oh, she looks like
a child to me is absurd. He's he looks he

(50:17):
looks like he's thirty two, and she looks like she's
twenty seven. I don't know they're actual ages, but it's
not that far from those, And it's like, what is
the problem. Like, again, it's a student and he's a teacher.
That's a different discussion obviously, but her actual age is
not an issue, or it shouldn't be. If you're going
to hire this actress. I don't know, they should have

(50:39):
at least done some stupid Hollywood shit where they put
her in pigtails or something to make us think she
was younger, because it's like it's a distraction in the movie,
the idea that she's supposed to be a college freshman,
and it's like, no, she's not. Like if your college
freshman was dating her, you'd be like, whoa, why are
you dating a woman this much older than you?

Speaker 5 (50:58):
She is maybe maybe a doctorate student.

Speaker 4 (51:03):
Yeah, I mean, if she took some time off after
grad school to like go back back through Europe for
two years before she came back to do her doctorate.

Speaker 6 (51:10):
Sure, this is no slam on like Meg Ryan, like
you just look at her. No, So the director was like, yeah, yeah,
she's good and just was okay with It's like everything.

Speaker 4 (51:25):
Her performance is actually good in the movie. She's a
good actress. She's a very attractive woman's her. She's good
in this movie. She's just not you know, someone you
would look at and go oh few, she's over eighteen,
that's all the problem is. It's like, that's if that's
if you want to cast her, then make her a
grad student and never want to go okay, grad students

(51:45):
are supposed to be twenty three. She looks twenty seven.
That's close enough, right, you know what I mean? That's fine. Wow.

Speaker 6 (51:51):
Somehow this is even more ridiculous than hiring thirty year
olds to play high school students.

Speaker 4 (51:57):
It is more a bit more ridiculous because a collection
of thirty year olds playing the high school students, interacting
with each other.

Speaker 5 (52:06):
Standing next to each other, it all blends in.

Speaker 4 (52:11):
But it's like it really takes you out of the movie,
and I don't know, I can't I can't believe a
Hollywood film would screw up and hire an actress that's
too old for the part. So the like, they're so
good at hiring actresses that are too young for the part.
It's the one thing they get wrong in the right way.

Speaker 6 (52:29):
Anyways, Yeah, and it didn't have to be that complicated.
Just make her his teaching assistant and then be like, oh,
I can't believe I slept with my teaching assistant. That's
all it takes.

Speaker 4 (52:38):
Yeah, because there are there are references in dialogue to
like it would be unethical for him to sleep with
the somebody who's belowing him in the structure, right, and
you're like, yeah, that doesn't have to be it then,
you know, even even if you said she was a
fourth year student about to graduate or something, rather than
specifically calling her a freshman. Anyways, what about when there's

(53:03):
a big nail gun scene in the middle of this movie.

Speaker 5 (53:07):
Listen the nail The nail gun scene is not the
best part of that scene. It's the elevator scene where
she's hanging by her super glued skin to his hand.
Because that was legitimately like, I went, ah like you
because I used to work whenever I worked in the

(53:28):
wood shop, you have to seal cracks and stuff with
what is essentially super glue, So I would quite often
super glue my finger tips together and things like that. Yeah,
and I have to deal with that, and it sucks.
And the idea of just hanging by your skin like that,

(53:48):
it hurts. It hurts my mind.

Speaker 6 (53:58):
Anything else say about the movie, because.

Speaker 5 (53:59):
I don't know that's pretty much yet. I mean, and
the effect, the effect of it ripping is real good,
But the weird thing is after it's ripped, the special
effect of her arm being fucked up is bad.

Speaker 4 (54:13):
What was the stupid seemage where they're stuck together and
they're going where I forget where they're going into and
she's like in her ninety she's like, I can't go
in like this, and so he's like, oh, we'll make
you look normal, and he pulls his suit coat on
and like puts it onto her, but now it's inside
out because it's on her, and it's like, this is
how you pass off yourself as normal in public by
wearing someone else's suit coat inside out? What is coming

(54:37):
on there? Like? Why is that happened?

Speaker 6 (54:40):
They were going to this Christmas Carnival thing right, and
that people would be dressed up so that it wouldn't.

Speaker 4 (54:48):
I think she did.

Speaker 5 (54:49):
I think she just didn't want to have her tits
out for that party. That's not a tits out party
like the other.

Speaker 4 (54:55):
I mean, but again, like you're going to draw unnecessary
attention to yourself if your coat's on inside out, Like
somebody's going to eventually point that out. I don't know.

Speaker 5 (55:03):
I mean unless you're the Fresh Prince of bel Air,
and then I think it's really cool.

Speaker 4 (55:09):
Listen, obviously this inspired the Fresh Prince of bel Air.
And anyways, these Dutch angles in that too, I think, yeah,
I didn't like. I did not really like this movie.

Speaker 6 (55:23):
I just thought I didn't either.

Speaker 4 (55:26):
I was I can't like. The performances are good at least,
and the movie has a particular tone that lasts throughout
the movie. So if we're comparing it and contrasting it
with the last movie, this is objectively better. But it's
just like somebody forgot to write a mystery into the
mystery movie.

Speaker 6 (55:45):
It's like, if the mystery was better, this would have
been a better Yeah.

Speaker 4 (55:48):
Like that, and I think, yeah, the stylistic choices too,
did nothing to help this movie because it's just this
weird thing where it's like, we're just gonna be weird
for weird sake, and I'm like, don't, don't do that,
You'll suck it up, and they did, so.

Speaker 5 (56:04):
Yeah, it's I don't know. Yeah, some of it's just strange.
The opening in black and white too. It's not just
that it's in black and white tonally, the acting and
the dialogue and stuff. Doesn't it make it feel like
it's a like a noir horror film.

Speaker 4 (56:24):
Like when a sitcom does like a dream sequence that
takes place in a horror film. Almost, Yeah, yeah, that's
what it is. And apparently I've read this, and I
can't confirm it because I watched the movie for free
on YouTube. But if you watch it, supposedly, like so,
the be opening scene is in black and white, and
the it's the rest of the movie is a flashback

(56:47):
leading up to that, and then it's black and white
again when you catch up to that moment, And supposedly
the color palette like gradually darkens throughout the film from
like bright colorfold down until it becomes black and white
in those final.

Speaker 6 (57:01):
Shots to death, Yes, which I did not notice.

Speaker 4 (57:05):
Yea, I didn't notice it, but I read about it,
and I'm like, I noticed obviously the beginning and the
end we're in black and white, which didn't surprise me
at all. Like I mean, and I'm in my head,
I'm like, oh, just like Clerks too. I'm like, so,
I'm like, you know, so, I'm like, I get I
got at the beginning of the end we're in black and white.
I didn't notice the transition throughout the film. It's supposedly there.

(57:26):
But to me, that is just like the level of
pretentious bullshit that I can't even I can't stand. And
I love pretentiousness, but I'm like, that kind of thing
is just like, just make a movie. A movie is
about telling a story and having characters. It's not about
all that other shit. All that other shit is supposed
to support those things, not have characters that you write

(57:47):
just for the sake of doing your stupid art house nonsense.

Speaker 8 (57:50):
Nice for calling the Midnight Driving and no one is
here to take your call. For more info, check out
the Midnight Drive In on Twitter at mn drive In.
I don't want to find us on Facebook. If you
one to email us, send it to the midnight drive
in at gmail dot com. Remember no outside food and drink.
Anyone can performing sexual acts at the drive in will

(58:13):
immediately be taken to the office unspeakable. Thanks, We'll be
done to you. Thanks for calling.

Speaker 6 (58:21):
What did we watched since last episode?

Speaker 5 (58:23):
Absolutely nothing, Doug, what did you watch?

Speaker 4 (58:28):
I watched one thing? Okay, well I had. I watched
the movie Weapons. I want to see that one in theaters,
which is for those of you who are not familiar.
It's the one where the in the trailer they're like,
all of these kids went missing. It exactly two seventeen

(58:49):
You guys, neither of you saw it.

Speaker 5 (58:51):
I'm not going to see it yet, but that director
made Barbarians, so I'm certainly going.

Speaker 6 (58:56):
I planned on seeing it this weekend and just ran
out of time.

Speaker 4 (59:00):
So I think if you like Barbarian you'll like this
one as well. It's so it's interesting because the way
this story is structured is it tells you, like one story,
and then it tells you another story from like then
there'll be like a character in that story that shows
up towards the end, and then they'll cut to, Okay,
what's that person been up to all day? Cut to

(59:22):
what's that person been up to all day? Like, so
that you get three or four different storylines leading up
to a climax where they all kind of connect. Right.
So at the beginning of the movie, in that first story,
like all the stuff about like, oh, all these kids
got up and left their house at two seventeen am,
and now no one's seen them, and now everyone's mad
at the teacher. All that stuff is like in the

(59:45):
prologue to the film, it's like in voiceover.

Speaker 5 (59:47):
And then minutes later do you find out that this
is a Justin Long movie?

Speaker 4 (59:52):
Justin Long shows up?

Speaker 5 (59:53):
Yes, yes, he did it again.

Speaker 4 (59:58):
He's too much smaller part this time now, but he
does show up. Yeah. So it's it's it's interesting because
that whole time you're watching it, you don't know what's
going on. Like you will not know the story of
this movie if you if you go in blind, the
trailers did not tell you the story of the movie.
The first two segments of the movie contribute basically nothing

(01:00:21):
to what the story of the movie is. It's more
about getting to know the lead characters and it's but
it's all mostly interesting. I would say there's a couple
of moments that for me didn't work, and I kept like,
I was like, yeah, there's at least one moment where
I'm like that's kind of dumb, and then I'm like, Okay,

(01:00:42):
it'll pay off later. I try because I've seen Barbarian, Right,
I'm like, that'll pay off later, that's gonna matter soon,
and then it doesn't, and then I'm like, well, then
you shouldn't have done that. Right. It's a moment that
takes place in like a dream sequence, so it doesn't
technically have to make sense. But I would say, like,
if I have a big criticism of the movie, it's

(01:01:04):
probably some of Josh Brolin's performance, which is a weird
thing to say because he's normally so good in things.
But there are a few moments where it's like, you
haven't done horror in a while, Abrol like it's he's
supposed to wake up screaming there and you haven't done that,
and it's coming across a little fake, And that's again

(01:01:25):
a weird thing for me to be saying, but it's
how I felt. I will say the climax is insane.
It borrows heavily from day to the dead, so you'll
appreciate that Noah, it borrows from the climax of Ferris
Bueller's Day Off.

Speaker 5 (01:01:42):
That's strange things. The thing I'm to do it it's.

Speaker 4 (01:01:47):
Yeah, I mean, I'm trying not I'm trying to give
you my thoughts on this film without spoiling anything, because
I think that's.

Speaker 5 (01:01:56):
One of the things that made Barbarian so good with
the marketing out. It gave me just enough of like
the tone, yeah, without giving.

Speaker 4 (01:02:05):
You I'll tell you this, like this movie does that
as well. It's like, it's a huge recommend. I'd love me.
I'm going to love to have a conversation about it afterwards.
But like, like you won't know going into this movie
at all what it's about if you've only seen those
trailers that came out before it was released. I know
some other stuff has come out after. I intentionally went
and saw it very early because I wanted to go

(01:02:27):
in blind. But yeah, it's it's good. It's crazy. You
Once the sort of air quotes, mystery unravels and they
start to explain what's going on, it becomes pretty obvious
what's going on. But then they still do a good
job of having a climax to the film that uses
that like what once we learned what evil exists in

(01:02:51):
this universe that they've created, it's like, yeah, okay, we
can we can then do cool things with that in
our climax of the film, in the last you know,
third or whatever the film. Once you once you're told
what's happened. So that's good, Like because a lot of
movies that rely on a like on a secret like that,
once the secrets revealed, you're like, this movie better be

(01:03:13):
over quick because they got nothing else. This isn't like that,
So that's good.

Speaker 5 (01:03:19):
I was gonna say, I think my my initial impression
from the trailer was I was like, are they trying
to make it look like it's Village of the Damned?

Speaker 1 (01:03:28):
Like is that?

Speaker 5 (01:03:29):
Is that what we're going for here?

Speaker 4 (01:03:32):
I mean, I think they made references to Village of
the Damned in the marketing on purpose. It is a
bunch of kids kind of being. It is a bunch
of kids disappearing all at once, and it gets creepier
when you find out how they disappeared, because you know,
I don't I can't say anything about it without smailing.
But nope, So I would appreciate it if you guys

(01:03:53):
would see it by next week so we can discuss
the will.

Speaker 5 (01:03:56):
I will do my best to see it this weekend.

Speaker 4 (01:03:58):
Kids, And almost everything is executed well in the movie.
There's like like the intercepting stories at the beginning, Like
the first one is about the teacher that everyone's mad at, right,
and then you cut to Josh Brolin's character, who's one
of the dads of one of the kids, and he's
one of the people that's mad at the teacher, and

(01:04:18):
there's those two storylines start to intersect, and then we
follow like she's having constant interactions with her principle, right,
So then we cut to like his life and it's
it's in weird ways, it's like a much more kind
of light hearted story, but it ends up being the
one that kicks off all the craziness and you have
this weird moment where like then there's a story of

(01:04:40):
like a police officer who I guess this I can
say this much non spoilery, Like she ends up sleeping
with her ex who's a police officer. So then we
then follow like his random story where he's like getting
into there's a homeless guy breaking into somewhere trying to
steal stuff. And he ends up chasing him down. That
all becomes hugely relevant, like all of this stuff ties

(01:05:03):
together by the end of the movie in a way
that is like really well done and really well thought of.
And so I can't I just can't tell you how,
but yeah, please please see it so we can discuss
it further next week. What did you watch, Brian.

Speaker 6 (01:05:21):
Well, the reason I couldn't go see is because Sendy
and her daughter are over and Cindy's daughter does not
like horror movies boo unless there's an animal eating somebody
in it. Yay, those are the only horror movies she
will watch.

Speaker 5 (01:05:37):
I mean, right, is a nerd. I can't hate anybody's
hyper specific shit.

Speaker 4 (01:05:43):
That.

Speaker 6 (01:05:44):
Yeah, So we're playing because she she is a musician.
She plays a guitar, she sings and stuff. Weirdly it
she can be seventeen in about two hours at seventeen,
plays gigs and actually gets paid for it. So she's

(01:06:04):
actually pretty decent at it. And we were doing some
like movie trivia on YouTube and a song came up
and I'm just like, have you ever seen Empire Records before?
And she is like no, So we watched Empire Records
just because there's lots of music and stuff in it.
She was not a huge fan. Weird was a bummer,

(01:06:26):
but Cindy had a good time watching it and singing
along with it, so so.

Speaker 5 (01:06:31):
Screw her not liking Empire Records strange. I guess it
is very nineties.

Speaker 6 (01:06:38):
It's very nineties, which we told her ahead of time.
It's gonna be very nineties.

Speaker 4 (01:06:44):
Yeah, I can I can see that being an issue
for somebody watching it who wasn't in high school in
the nineties.

Speaker 6 (01:06:50):
Yeah. But then we moved on to some animal attacks movies.
I had picked up a movie called Sharkenstein for five
bucks off Voodoo because this is what happens now. She
likes animal attack movies, so I see them on sale
and I'm like, oh, we can I'll buy this and
we can watch it when she comes over next And

(01:07:13):
so far this is the first big mistake I've made.
So Sharkenstein from twenty sixteen. Evil Scientist is trying to
build the you know, reanimated tissue experiment has the original
Frankenstein's monster's brain and heart and decides to put it

(01:07:36):
into a shark because it's the title of the movie.

Speaker 5 (01:07:41):
I was gonna say, because science.

Speaker 6 (01:07:46):
What is said during modern day. The actual shark looks
like someone made it out of play though, and just like, like,
I wouldn't be surprised if they told me, oh, yeah,
we just had someone stand on a dock and then
someone used their hand to move the shark in front

(01:08:06):
of the lens closer to the lens to make it
look like he ate him.

Speaker 5 (01:08:10):
Yeah, well going pretty much.

Speaker 6 (01:08:14):
Doug will appreciate this. Cindy said that looks like the
special effect at the end of every Buffy episode when
they show the company logo. She's like, it's about that quality.
So it was terrible. One of the funny things is,
since we were talking about people who were too old

(01:08:35):
for roles, is they cast three people as like the
party people that, of course are supposed to stumble upon this.
One girl looks like she's about thirty. She's fine. The
other guy maybe like mid to late thirties. Again, okay,

(01:08:56):
I could see them out boating and whatever problem is
ninety six, Well, the problem is the the mid to
late thirty guy takes his shirt off and has the
thickest chest pubes I've ever seen in my life. We
were all just like, oh my god. The shark's gonna
get caught in his chest. Like Jesus, he could have

(01:09:18):
at least thintened it out before they started filming.

Speaker 5 (01:09:21):
Please please tell me that's actually how the movie ends.
That like they defeat that, they defeat the shark whenever
it gets tangled at his chest pubes and suffocates because
it can't swim anymore.

Speaker 6 (01:09:31):
I think they blew it up jaw style, but I
don't even remember. And then the third guy had to
at least be fifty, but he was a guy who
like had his hat slightly turned to the side, and
I was just like, they literally told him, just turn

(01:09:53):
your hat to the side. Nobody will, everybody will think
you're younger. It is the most ridiculous, like he does
the entire movie. But then otherwise it looks like he's
dressed like a dad, like he's about to go golfing,
and I'm just like, what the fuck? The acting is terrible,
everything's terrible. It's all horrible, And yeah, the movie was

(01:10:16):
not good.

Speaker 4 (01:10:17):
All I can say is they combined a shark movie
with a Frankenstein movie. I have been trying so hard
not to watch this, so I just wanted to thank
you for taking one for the team. It is. I
have been like so many times, I've hovered over it,
being like, it's a shark and it's Frankenstein.

Speaker 5 (01:10:34):
How do I not? I feel like, even with that
dire warning, you're still gonna watch this movie.

Speaker 4 (01:10:39):
Yeah, one day I'll forget what Brian said.

Speaker 6 (01:10:43):
Yeah, you'll regret it. You'll be like, oh no, I
didn't learn a lesson, Like it's bad. I'm gonna send you,
guys this picture of this guy with his hat on.

Speaker 5 (01:10:54):
Jesus Christ, what's up, fellow teenes.

Speaker 6 (01:11:00):
It? This movie was fucking awful. But Cindy was looking
up stuff that the like other movies that the filmmakers
had made, and they made one called Queen crab Hey,
and I was like, all right, it's on toob So
I turned it on. Why just because that's what they

(01:11:21):
wanted to watch. These two were laughing their ass off
the entire time, and I'm like, I'm suffering. They don't care.

Speaker 4 (01:11:27):
I feel like no Is should take back what he
said good about nerves hyper specific films.

Speaker 5 (01:11:34):
Why would I do that? They sound awesome. They're laughing
like maniacs. That shit was.

Speaker 6 (01:11:40):
This one was better than Sharkenstein.

Speaker 4 (01:11:43):
Sounds like a high bar.

Speaker 6 (01:11:45):
Yeah, it's this woman who as a kid feeds weird
scientifically engineered grapes to a crab, because.

Speaker 4 (01:11:56):
Sure, crabs don't eat grapes, do they.

Speaker 6 (01:11:59):
Yeah, I don't, the one in this movie did, and
crabs can eat breaks grapes, dug And then when she
gets older we see her where she will out in
the moonlight, go out and dance naked for some reason
that will that will call to this now ginormous crab
that lives in this pond or this lake. But then

(01:12:23):
of course it lays eggs and they hatch and the
townspeople start getting killed because of giant crabs naked.

Speaker 5 (01:12:32):
There's naked dancing summoning a giant crab.

Speaker 6 (01:12:36):
Yeah, that was some of the better parts of it.

Speaker 4 (01:12:38):
Well that sounds prettyeah. I mean that that's the part
I can get behind.

Speaker 6 (01:12:42):
I think, Yeah, But the acting was, you know, atrocious,
and special effects were better at least, so somebody learned
some stuff, but you know, still not great, but better
than Sharkenstein, for damn sure. And then I posted something

(01:13:04):
on Facebook with the picture I sent you guys about
this movie, and someone commented, oh my god, Sharkenstein. That
is the worst movie I've wasted my time on. And
then they commented how the fire effects in it were
terrible because there's a couple of scenes where somebody has
like a lit torch and whatever, because they're doing the

(01:13:24):
whole Frankenstein thing where the village people are mad at
the monster. And I was like, yes, the fire effects
that if, that is what the big problem with this
movie was, because Jesus Christ fucking terrible. At one time,
it does mutate and becomes like a land shark with

(01:13:49):
like giant like arms. Remember street sharks, Like it reminded
me of street sharks.

Speaker 5 (01:13:56):
That okay, so stop trying to connvinced me.

Speaker 6 (01:14:00):
To watch this movie, Like I can send you a
picture of the uh.

Speaker 5 (01:14:07):
Because frankin straight Shark. It's just about enough. It's just
about enough to make me ignore every morning.

Speaker 6 (01:14:17):
You would probably love this movie. I wanted to shoot
myself it.

Speaker 5 (01:14:21):
It depends. So the problem is that my love of
shitty shitty movies kind of has an expiration date on it.
Newer shitty shitty movies. Those CG special effects fucking kill me.
I can't it's so fucking bad.

Speaker 6 (01:14:36):
Oh well, this isn't CG. This is this is a
legit model that is badly animated.

Speaker 5 (01:14:42):
Okay, I can if it's just weird Plato Shark and
it's not just CG blood and stuff.

Speaker 6 (01:14:48):
Yeah, I just think you the picture, you can open
up and look at it and be like, oh look.

Speaker 4 (01:14:52):
I'm choosing not to just so sure. I was also
sent the picture and I just don't want to see it.

Speaker 6 (01:14:59):
Yeah, it's uh, it's not good. I feel like the
people at sci Fi Channel saw this like it was
somebody submitted it and they were like, oh God, no.

Speaker 5 (01:15:11):
Are you. We have a much higher bar than this.

Speaker 6 (01:15:15):
Yes, the channel that brought you Lavea Lanceela will not
be airing this piece of garbage.

Speaker 5 (01:15:23):
Jesus Christ, you self, AlSi Pastor thought you could compete.

Speaker 6 (01:15:30):
They're making a sequel to Velo past If they haven't.

Speaker 5 (01:15:33):
That's because a lot of people fucking love a los
Holy shit, I'm watching this movie.

Speaker 6 (01:15:40):
What the fuck did the picture just saw? You want it?

Speaker 4 (01:15:43):
Yes? For fucking real, He's gonna not see weapons now
because of you watch this ship.

Speaker 5 (01:15:49):
Damn it. No, If I do that, I'm gonna be
so ashamed of myself. And I only say that because
there's always a direct possibility that that is the course
of my life.

Speaker 6 (01:16:06):
One thing it did do was made me go, oh,
I still haven't made a movie yet. This one is
one that I bought on an actual service, so that
means I could make something get in on a service
as well.

Speaker 5 (01:16:22):
That is correct.

Speaker 6 (01:16:25):
Apparently Wild Eye Releasing will take just about anything.

Speaker 1 (01:16:28):
Here's a brief glimpse of some of the truly fine
pictures we've got touls in the near future.

Speaker 6 (01:16:34):
All right, Uh.

Speaker 5 (01:16:36):
No, uh fucked.

Speaker 6 (01:16:39):
There was something I was going to bring up that
we forgot to bring up on our actual review, and
now I don't know what it was.

Speaker 5 (01:16:46):
It's a thing feedback. Do we have feedback?

Speaker 6 (01:16:56):
There's the actually something in the in our review. We
forgot to bring something up about one of the movies,
but I don't remember what it was. Oh. The people
who made do OA are the people who created the
character of Max Headrow.

Speaker 4 (01:17:08):
Oh, I think I did see something about that.

Speaker 6 (01:17:12):
They got to make do OA because people were just like, well,
you did a good job in creating this this ip here,
why don't you make a movie? And they made as
the first one? Interesting? All right, hey, noah, what are
we doing next week?

Speaker 5 (01:17:27):
Well, as Doug was saying he wanted shit to get weird,
So I was looking for a weird shit that has
been on my list to watch that I have not watched.
And you had mentioned flashback and one of their favorite
trailers is The Devil's Rain with Billy Shatner. It's an

(01:17:52):
uh it's it's Bill Shatner, a goat man, the Devil
and Ernest Borgan, right, like for Fox's sakes, like how
and I have not watched this despite that list of things,
I have never watched it.

Speaker 6 (01:18:08):
I'm always afraid that the movie is not going to
live up to the trailer.

Speaker 5 (01:18:11):
Yeah, but no, eventually I got to you just got
to bite the bullet, right.

Speaker 4 (01:18:16):
I remember really enjoying the movie, but I went in
not knowing there was a goat man. The first time
I watched this movie, that goat man was a shock
to me.

Speaker 6 (01:18:28):
Is that Gope Boy from s n L. No, it's better,
I would hope, so dope Boy from.

Speaker 4 (01:18:36):
Uh so there. So we're gonna do that.

Speaker 5 (01:18:38):
And then I decided to team it with another one
of that director's many illustrious films, with the Abominable Doctor Fibes,
which I've also never seen, despite it being a very
well known movie and Vincent Price movie.

Speaker 6 (01:18:56):
I am excited to rewatch The Doctor FIBs watch a
long time and I have since picked up the uh
Keino Lorber Blu ray that has Doctor Fibes and Doctor
Phibes Rises again, so this would be a good excuse
for me to bust that out.

Speaker 5 (01:19:14):
Yeah, I did Doctor Fibes because I figured you guys
could forgive me for a Fencent Price movie. Yeah, if
it's if it's if it's fucking terrible or whatever, because
the other option was The Revenge of the Stepford Wives,
which is also a filmmaker by the director, And I
was like interesting, But then I was like, you know what,

(01:19:37):
I don't think I've ever seen The Stepford Wives. Probably
should see that before I watched the sequel.

Speaker 6 (01:19:44):
Keep up with the plot.

Speaker 5 (01:19:45):
Probably, I mean, I'm assuming it's robot bitches, Like it's
kind of it's kind of what that movie was. Robot bitches,
be crazy.

Speaker 6 (01:19:59):
Listen.

Speaker 4 (01:20:00):
This director made a movie called The Final Program, which
will be on the list at some point, about scientists
creating her raaphrodite, which will be able to self reproduce
and therefore effectively be immortal.

Speaker 6 (01:20:13):
So I'm sure that movie is nice and respectful, and I.

Speaker 5 (01:20:18):
Do I do believe it's based off Michael Mark Cox story.

Speaker 4 (01:20:22):
It's not It wasn't inspired by a play or anything.

Speaker 6 (01:20:25):
Did you say Michael Moorecock story?

Speaker 5 (01:20:28):
Isn't that right?

Speaker 6 (01:20:29):
And it's about do about a woman who's born.

Speaker 5 (01:20:32):
With the with the dicky. I know his name is silly,
but you put some respect.

Speaker 6 (01:20:40):
On saying the subject matter and the name together. I
don't know what what other stuff is. Has he written?

Speaker 5 (01:20:49):
Mark?

Speaker 6 (01:20:49):
He was?

Speaker 5 (01:20:50):
He was one of the ones like Isaac asthmov and
those that wrote like a fuck ton of those yellow
page science fiction stories Judge.

Speaker 6 (01:21:02):
Interesting but yeah, yes, it'll be.

Speaker 5 (01:21:04):
It'll be interesting. Like that director. It looks like he
made several movies that are like known if not good,
and then after school specials in kids movies.

Speaker 4 (01:21:19):
Yeah, ay man, So she need to paycheck? What are
you gon do?

Speaker 6 (01:21:23):
Listen to?

Speaker 5 (01:21:24):
His career looks disturbingly similar to that of George Miller. So,
I mean George Miller makes uh the most badass action
post apocalyptic movies of all time and happy Feet like
Babe two Pig in the City.

Speaker 6 (01:21:45):
Did uh make the one with Linda Blair where she
was like a teenage alcoholic.

Speaker 5 (01:21:51):
I'm not sure.

Speaker 6 (01:21:55):
Interesting. I assume we're just done. We're just gonna stop
talking now.

Speaker 4 (01:22:04):
Oh where somebody's supposed to say something clever. We're still
getting over the excitement of going white water rafting and
not being attaught by Kevin Pickins. So every moment's a
gift at this point for me.

Speaker 6 (01:22:17):
Oh wait, you went white at water rafting.

Speaker 4 (01:22:20):
Yeah, I told you you had booked it.

Speaker 6 (01:22:22):
I didn't know it was coming up that quickly though.

Speaker 4 (01:22:24):
Yeah. It wasn't as exciting as it's portrayed in the movies.
It was, you know, eight tourists and a guide on
a boat for three hours. I'm sure were allowed to
get out and swim.

Speaker 5 (01:22:36):
I was gonna say, I suppose it depends on the
difficulty of the river you're doing.

Speaker 4 (01:22:40):
Yeah, and when you're going with children, you know, going
the right, going the insane ones. So but it was
kind of fun.

Speaker 5 (01:22:49):
I mean, there there seems to be three settings. There's like, oh,
I thought this was going to be exciting, and and
then there's oh, that's all right, and there's oh, fucking god,
gonna die correct.

Speaker 6 (01:23:06):
So he didn't. Did did Landa go with you?

Speaker 1 (01:23:10):
Yeah?

Speaker 6 (01:23:11):
Okay. So Kevin Bacon just didn't step out from behind
like a bush or something and was like, guess what, guys,
we're going backpacking for the next two weeks.

Speaker 4 (01:23:20):
There was we're German tourists on there, so I was like,
those could be the Kevin Bacon of this trip. Trust them,
they're not speaking English.

Speaker 5 (01:23:31):
Then he looked closer and it is Kevin Bacon. It's
that good of an actor.

Speaker 4 (01:23:35):
He's just that good. He's playing a twenty one year
old like German backpacker.

Speaker 6 (01:23:42):
In Ottawaug discriminating against people just because they don't speak English.
You're not an American, you're supposed.

Speaker 4 (01:23:50):
Sorry, was that cultural appropriation on my part?

Speaker 6 (01:23:53):
Was saying, yeah, only we get to do stuff like that,
not yet.

Speaker 4 (01:24:03):
It's the equivalent to a white lady opening a taco truck.
That was what I just did.

Speaker 6 (01:24:08):
So you would say Weapons was good, yes, because ironically
Scott text me today asking me if I knew if
Weapons was good, and I said, I don't know. I
didn't get a chance to see it. I was like,
but Doug did, and he's like, did he like it?
And I'm like, I don't know. We're recording tonight, so
I have no idea. So Scott has thrown out that

(01:24:29):
maybe we should meet him Bloomington this weekend and go
see it so I can tell Scott that it's worth watching.

Speaker 4 (01:24:37):
Yeah, oh it's good. If you like Barbarian, you'll like this,
which is like, it's just you know, it's a different film,
but totally they have similarities.

Speaker 6 (01:24:47):
All right, Well, was texting Scott, Doug says Weapons is
worth a watch.

Speaker 4 (01:24:53):
Oh, well, you're making your weekend plans while we're recording,
but I'm not.

Speaker 6 (01:24:56):
I just remember that he asked me about this, so
I wanted to get your official stamp that I could
tell Scott that you said it was worth watching.

Speaker 4 (01:25:05):
Keep in mind, I did make a habit for about
two years of telling Scott to watch shitty movies.

Speaker 6 (01:25:14):
The other thing that happened today is I got a
text from my brother, and you know, I was working,
so I didn't look at it right away, and then
I opened the message up and he said, and the
message says, I about lost a finger today, with a
picture below it of a very graphic giant cover on
his index finger about apparently the band saw at work

(01:25:37):
went crazy and he cut himself real bad, and there
was zero warning, and I opened it up and just
went boo.

Speaker 4 (01:25:44):
I was good to say, no, that sounds fun.

Speaker 6 (01:25:48):
Not okay. I was just like, what the fuck, man,
that's bad.

Speaker 5 (01:25:54):
You don't do that.

Speaker 7 (01:25:55):
No.

Speaker 6 (01:25:56):
I was like, my stomach is like flip flopping right now.

Speaker 5 (01:26:00):
I didn't even see the picture of my stomach hurts.

Speaker 6 (01:26:03):
Right.

Speaker 4 (01:26:05):
Ah, I'm fine with it.

Speaker 6 (01:26:07):
I'm sure you are. I'll send it directly to you.

Speaker 4 (01:26:10):
Better than that. Picture of the shark refused to open.

Speaker 6 (01:26:15):
But it's the shark that is convinced Noah, he needs
to walk.

Speaker 4 (01:26:17):
Oh my god.

Speaker 5 (01:26:20):
I'm gonna watch it on silent and just plain sounds
from street Sharks to the whole movie and see like
Dark Side of the Moon.

Speaker 6 (01:26:29):
Here literally is the guy standing on the dock fishing,
and the shark looks like it just comes up and
levitates out of the water and goes.

Speaker 5 (01:26:37):
Then, yeah, that sounds great.

Speaker 6 (01:26:47):
Yep, I bought that on a major streaming service. Five dollars.
You're part of the problem, though, well, I watched it
sight unseen.

Speaker 4 (01:26:56):
Yeah let him five dollars.

Speaker 5 (01:27:00):
Also supporting filmmakers even if they're bad filmmakers.

Speaker 4 (01:27:06):
All I'm saying is when you double their budget by
giving them five dollars, and now that's a hugely profitable film.
It's an ROI of one hundred.

Speaker 6 (01:27:17):
Well I didn't learn my lesson because I already bought
a movie today called Gator Lake from twenty five.

Speaker 5 (01:27:25):
So well, I mean that sounds great too.

Speaker 4 (01:27:28):
Also for five dollars, what if it's super realistic and
the gators almost never attack people because they're like, eah,
those are too big for me to eat, and they
just lay there much smaller animals and no one cares.

Speaker 6 (01:27:40):
About That's gonna be disappointing, But I don't think so.
It says lurking into Florida's Florida's Deadliest Lake, a bloodthirsty
alligator goes on a killing rampage to claim its territory,
with the body count rising, An ex con gator wrangler
seeking redemption hunts the creature to end its rain of terror.

Speaker 4 (01:28:01):
Fuck yeah, come on, ex con gator wranglers. Sounds like
a ripoff of Deep Blue Sea, which had an x
con shark wrangler in it.

Speaker 6 (01:28:09):
So also sounds like that dude from Killer Crocodile.

Speaker 4 (01:28:15):
Is he an x con?

Speaker 6 (01:28:17):
No?

Speaker 4 (01:28:17):
But I mean probably.

Speaker 6 (01:28:21):
The guy that I think is the X con was
in the movie The Rock, So.

Speaker 4 (01:28:28):
Well, anyways, remember when we were done talking and then
we said all this stuff that's not very interesting.

Speaker 6 (01:28:34):
I also bought season one of RoboCop, but I haven't
watched it yet.

Speaker 4 (01:28:38):
I've been debating over and over again whether to get
into that.

Speaker 6 (01:28:41):
Show you missed out. I think Guy sent the picture, well,
you don't have voodoo out there or Fendango at home
or whatever. But it was a dollar ninety nine for
the entire season.

Speaker 4 (01:28:51):
He's just on two b here, though, do you.

Speaker 6 (01:28:57):
Twenty two episodes?

Speaker 4 (01:29:00):
Dug, You're right, that's too much of a commitment.

Speaker 6 (01:29:07):
I was listening to a podcast, the Rewatchables, which I
have been listening to recently, and they were talking about
the original RoboCop and how great it is. But then
of course brought up the moment where they were promoting
RoboCop two and Robocops showed up in WCW to help
Sting like the Horseman.

Speaker 4 (01:29:25):
I believe it was m hm, what was the problem
with that?

Speaker 6 (01:29:29):
They were just like this was ridiculous, and I was like,
you shut your horrormouth.

Speaker 5 (01:29:35):
I mean, the Muppets hosted.

Speaker 4 (01:29:38):
Raw didn't participate in a match.

Speaker 5 (01:29:43):
Only because the logistics are so difficult.

Speaker 4 (01:29:47):
The logistics were just as difficult with robo Cup, just
so we're clear.

Speaker 5 (01:29:52):
Although I'm actually surprised that they didn't put a wrestler
in the Sweeten suit and have him fucking power bomb somebody.

Speaker 4 (01:29:59):
I would have see that would be funny.

Speaker 6 (01:30:02):
You found out that canonically Seamous and Beaker are related,
so are right it happened on the show, Doug.

Speaker 4 (01:30:13):
I'm not denying that in the least.

Speaker 1 (01:30:15):
Please remember to replace the speaker on the post when
you leave the theater.

Speaker 6 (01:30:29):
And now, folks, it's time to say good night.

Speaker 1 (01:30:31):
We sincerely appreciate your patronage and hope we've succeeded in
bringing you an enjoyable evening of entertainment.

Speaker 6 (01:30:38):
Please drive home carefully and come back again soon. Good Night,