The Thing With Two Heads & The Incredible Two-Headed Transplant

Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
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Speaker 1 (00:37):
Drive away your worries and cares at this drive in theater.

Speaker 2 (00:42):
That's why.

Speaker 3 (00:43):
To familiarize you with the movie rating.

Speaker 2 (00:44):
Symbols which will be used by this theater, we present
the following guide for parents and young people.

Speaker 1 (00:50):
X No one under seventeen admitted.

Speaker 3 (00:55):
So clarify. When I logged on, I thought you guys
were having a conversation with movies, but you were talking
talking about creepy sex pests.

Speaker 4 (01:02):
Again, specifically Paul Verhoven's.

Speaker 3 (01:08):
Right, right, just a sex pest who happens to make movies.

Speaker 5 (01:12):
I think.

Speaker 4 (01:15):
Now, to be fair, he has not been accused of
being a sex pest. He just likes to do fair
sex pesty stuff in his movies.

Speaker 3 (01:24):
Yeah, well no, actually, Sharon Stone is pretty upset with
him over her whole vagina being exposed.

Speaker 4 (01:31):
It's true. So now fucking Scott is sending me videos
Scott still alive. Why does everybody wait until we like
are signed on and ready to record and then sending
me shit? Fucking Windows is going crazy? Do I play
the video live on the podcast?

Speaker 3 (01:50):
No, it's Scott. We don't trust him.

Speaker 5 (01:53):
Mhm, Scotty New I don't know what this is.

Speaker 4 (01:57):
It's just a Lego. Uh, it's a Lego Jason set Okay,
I'm assuming he it's his. He bought it and put
it together.

Speaker 5 (02:08):
I do love I love the fact that like Lego
every once in a while are just like, hey, this
is a completely inappropriate YI for to toy.

Speaker 3 (02:17):
Lego's not a kid's toy anymore. There's like tons of
grown ups doing Lego out there, and some of them
are so complicated and they cost hundreds of dollars that
they're clearly not intended for children.

Speaker 4 (02:27):
I just I don't know why Scott sent me this
because it's Jason, because it's Lego. Sure, just there's no message.
It's literally as it was. Just the video just popped up,
so I don't know, like, Okay, is this something you
put together? Is this something from a group? I don't
I don't understand what it is. Also, Scott's kind of crazy.

Speaker 5 (02:49):
So you guys are crazy man Yellow, all right, it's
staying forever.

Speaker 3 (02:59):
This is.

Speaker 4 (03:01):
Should I just shorten it down to you guys are
all woohoo?

Speaker 3 (03:04):
And Chet just just you should be updating.

Speaker 4 (03:08):
It weekly with I didn't have time today.

Speaker 5 (03:12):
I just I just need you to edit in. I
still believe that's what I from Lost Boys. Yes, why
because I used to have so much fun on Murph
from the Fat Kid whatever. I would play that randomly
twenty times in an episode.

Speaker 4 (03:28):
I why not remember that? No, can we move on?
You know the way you're acting, Doug, I feel like
I'm going to knock you out at some point, and
just so Noah's head to you to your body so
you two can annoy each other for eternity.

Speaker 3 (03:47):
Well, he has to be the racist one.

Speaker 5 (03:50):
Then it's weird that you went that direction and not
the idiot direction.

Speaker 3 (04:00):
Because I don't know the polite way to describe that.
Seventies and eighties manchild mental illness that you can have
for some reason, which, in the case of this particular movie,
you get from being locked in a mine underground.

Speaker 4 (04:15):
Brain damage from lack of oxygen.

Speaker 3 (04:17):
That's what it is.

Speaker 4 (04:18):
That's what they said. Yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 3 (04:21):
I know they said he was he had the mentality
of an eight year old. And I also know that
if my eight year old acted like that, he'd get
a smack for being annoying. About eight year old's act.

Speaker 4 (04:34):
Rough house over at Doug's house. All right, Uh, hey, Doug,
why don't you tell us about the incredible two headed transplant?

Speaker 3 (04:44):
Incredible two headed transplant. Let's see. So the movie opens,
we have two stories going on. One is the story
of a sex maniact who is murdering, raping women, found
not guilty by reason of insanity, put into a mental institution,
and eventually kills some guards and escapes. The other story

(05:08):
is just a guy who's sowing two heads on too
shit for fun, makes a two headed monkey, two headed snake.
It's all for science y reasons. It's one of us.
It's one of those situations.

Speaker 5 (05:19):
Where there's like that Tale from the Sea, it's.

Speaker 3 (05:23):
The It's one of those situations where it's a rich
person who has a science lab in their basement. For
some reason, that just happened in movies from the fifties
to the eighties and so anyways, in a shocking twist
of events, the sex pest shows up at the house
of the rich people, does a little bit of murdering.
Through a series of unfortunate events, his head is removed

(05:46):
and sewn onto the mentally delayed person who lives at
the house. I forget the relationships between all the people,
So then it's a struggle from then on to see
which one can troll the body in order to determine
whether they're going to go and do some murdering or
whether they're gonna not. And then for some reason, Casey
Kasem's in this movie and he comes to visit and

(06:10):
solves all the problems at the end of the movie,
which is really funny because this movie came out in
nineteen seventy one and Scooby Doo started in nineteen sixty nine,
so someone took a break from film and kids cartoons
to go and do this as an accurate enough plot description,
can we sure? I mean, I'm trying to remember the

(06:32):
ending of this movie. Tit These two movies like Forewarning
to the listeners. I may accidentally describe parts of the movie,
and you guys would be like, that's from the other one.

Speaker 5 (06:41):
No one would be able to tell.

Speaker 3 (06:45):
The mind collapses in this one, right, collapses with them
inside of it, because we get that really terrible special
effect of they just have guys lying in the floor
of a mine and then they superimpose using nineteen seventy
one technology dirt falling.

Speaker 4 (07:00):
Did you see it? I couldn't see it.

Speaker 3 (07:01):
Oh yeah, I can see it.

Speaker 4 (07:03):
So I was watching both of these at work and
got really worried when the guy at the beginning of
this movie was kind of rape but ended up not
being very rapy. But yeah, so when we get towards
the end where he goes into the into the cave
or the mine, yeah, like the video was very dark

(07:23):
and I was looking at on my phone, so okay,
I couldn't really see much of the ending other than oh, collapsed.

Speaker 3 (07:30):
I watched the two B stream of this and it
was pretty clear, like and you could see it was
almost like it was one of those you know, where
they just put the two pieces of film over top
of each other in that seventies style, and they just
had sand falling in one and in the background there
was a completely separate shot people in a mine going,
oh no, the sand, Oh no, the sand.

Speaker 5 (07:50):
I slightly cheated, guys, because I watched the Riff Tracks versions.

Speaker 3 (07:56):
Oh you son of a bitch. I almost did. I
turned on and it didn't say it was the Riff
Tracks version, but it doesn't, and I was like, oh
do I do? I just watch this version because it's
definitely a movie that would be appropriate in those circumstances.

Speaker 4 (08:12):
But yeah, spoiler spoiler alert, I should have watched the
Tracks version.

Speaker 3 (08:18):
The only reason I didn't is because the Riff Tracks
version I had never seen this before, and the way
that they were, the level of volume that they were speaking,
I would never been able to follow what was going
on in the actual movie.

Speaker 5 (08:32):
So see, it wasn't a volume that made it hard
to follow. It was just the fact that I was
laughing every time they made a fucking casey case and joke, Yeah,
which is which is what they're doing through ninety five percent?

Speaker 3 (08:44):
Well, it's the fucking the voice of Shaggy showing up
in this weird ass movie somewhere in like head and
Land that his top forty gig yet so he had
to make some side cash believen better.

Speaker 5 (08:55):
They kept going, this is America's best blab.

Speaker 4 (09:01):
Maybe he got it from this because even though he
is a was a doctor. Yeah, there's numerous points where
you hear someone talking over the radio and it's him.

Speaker 3 (09:11):
It sure does say it was him, And did you
look that up because it sure sounds like him.

Speaker 4 (09:15):
No, but I could tell it was him, and I'm
just like, oh, so they're using him on the radio
but pretending it's somebody else.

Speaker 3 (09:24):
That's really funny. Yeah, Like I could hear him on
the radio and I'm like, that's him. And then I'm like,
but I thought that was him in the beginning of
the movie, because he's in the beginning of the movie.
Then he leaves and he's like, I have to go
back to work, but I have more vacation time scheduled.
So you're like, okay, Like it's Chekhof's friend who visits
a lot is obviously going to play a role in
the final act. Like it's really weird, and I'm like okay.

Speaker 5 (09:47):
But then I'm like they can't.

Speaker 3 (09:48):
Because in my head, I don't think I knew he
was a doctor yet, because if they said it. I
didn't care, so like, I'm like, is that did he?

Speaker 4 (09:56):
Like?

Speaker 3 (09:57):
He like had to go back to town to be
the radio guy, and then it's gonna show back up
later like on his next break from the radio, Like,
is that what's happening?

Speaker 4 (10:08):
It's like, well, I did the news report and then
I guess I'm done for the day.

Speaker 5 (10:16):
Anyways, this movie, nick letter comes from sharing. She's saying,
somebody sued an extra head to my body. Anyway, here's
the runaway.

Speaker 4 (10:29):
This movie was not very good in my opinion. It
may be that I watched this one seconds, so spoiler
alert from my thoughts for the next one.

Speaker 3 (10:40):
But yeah, I will say that I will agree that
officially the statement is this, this is not a good movie.
I will say I had fun watching it. I enjoyed
watching the two heads interact. I enjoyed the fact that
in the early scenes the guy who was good to
have a second head sewn onto him. Because for people

(11:01):
who haven't seen the movie, the technology they have to
make it look like a person has two heads is
in the far off scenes through mache on his shoulder,
and in the close up scenes just another actor is
standing behind the one actor with his head sticking out
of a second hole in the shirt to try to
make it look like there's two heads. But in the
early scenes of the movie, I couldn't stop laughing about

(11:23):
the fact that the actor who's going to have the
second head sewn onto him is wearing like some kind
of giant suit over his regular clothes so to make
him look bigger so that he won't look ridiculous when
the second guy is there. But the suit that he's
wearing is like, it's not tight to his neck, so
you can see the line around his neck and then
you can see his other clothes that he's wearing under

(11:44):
the suit. And that was a lot of fun for
me to watch, even though again objectively not good. And
the other thing is that this movie is basically the
Frankenstein story, Like it's got a lot of beats similar
to the nineteen thirty one film. It's almost like a
shot of the Dead style remake of that. So I'm

(12:06):
a sucker for that story, so I'm always excited to
watch it happen. Yeah, but yeah, I mean, does that
make this technically a good film? No, it just means
I had fun watching it, even without the riff tracks
that some people watched.

Speaker 5 (12:20):
It made it so much better. I had really good
I was gonna say, listen, I had a really good
time watching this movie. And it wasn't because the movie
was good. It's because I love riff tracks.

Speaker 4 (12:34):
We should point out of the two movies, this one
is the better cast. Like the names kept popping up
and I was just like, holy fuck, started doing it
like this right and not just like oh he walked
by in the background, like he's one of the main characters.

Speaker 3 (12:50):
Oh, yeah, he's important in this film.

Speaker 6 (12:53):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (12:55):
It's also like how we commented before with Tom Hanks.
In this situation, you could tell like, oh shit, he's
actually a good actor and everybody else kind of sucks.

Speaker 3 (13:05):
Eh. That's fair because even Casey Caseon doesn't stand out.
If you didn't, if you don't recognize that voice, you
know what I mean? Yeah I did. I will say too.
I enjoyed the first part of the film. I liked
the two headed monkey. I thought that was a lot
of fun. Like, the two headed snake looked really good.
I don't know if they found a real two headed
snake or what they did, but it's uh yeah, the

(13:30):
it looked really good and had two moving tongues if
it was one, if one of the heads was fake,
they did a good enough job. The monkey was obviously
my favorite, you know, because it was adorable because it's
the monkey, and it also just like the second head
on it, you could tell it like didn't really want
to be there. It's like fucking humans, but a stupid
toy head on me, and now I got to crawl
around in this gauge.

Speaker 4 (13:52):
Yeah. Secondary theme this week, uh, two headed primates.

Speaker 3 (13:57):
That's correct. Yeah, second tertiary theme is kind of the
highlight of both movies is the two edited primate.

Speaker 4 (14:08):
Yeah. So we have Bruce Dern and there's Casey Kasem
and then Pat Priest who played Linda, who was brews
Den's wife. Right, they're married, right, I don't know. Yeah,
she played Lily or not Lily the uh Maryland Monster.

Speaker 5 (14:28):
Didn't.

Speaker 3 (14:29):
I didn't realize it was her. And then I'm like,
but now you're saying it, I'm like, yeah, of course
it is.

Speaker 5 (14:34):
That was That was also one of the running jokes
in the riff tracks where they kept being like, well
you would have trauma too if you were raised my
family of real monsters.

Speaker 4 (14:44):
God damn it. No, And now I'm jealous because I
had to watch the actual movie at work and just
hope no weird rape should happen while somebody was walking by.

Speaker 5 (14:52):
Hey, you guys, fucked, that wasn't If there's a riff
tracks available, we should be watching the riff tracks.

Speaker 3 (14:57):
Where we shouldn't because we're just gonna steal their joke.

Speaker 5 (15:02):
Sure, but you'll be happy.

Speaker 3 (15:05):
I don't know. I think it sounds like I'm a
lot more positive on this movie than you guys are,
And I think that is probably because I did watch
it first, because you know, it came out a year earlier,
so you want to watch these things in chronological order
so you can see if the technology of having one
actor stand behind another actor has improved or.

Speaker 5 (15:24):
Not only only slightly.

Speaker 3 (15:31):
But yeah, for me, I think I like. I like
the Frankenstein element of it. I was entertained enough at
the beginning, like throughout all the stuff with the two
headed monkey and stuff, I'm like, yeah, I can get
behind this movie. And I've never seen that movie we
like this before, so I could say the ending was
pretty atrocious. The special effects were kind of unforgivable in

(15:52):
that mind collapse.

Speaker 4 (15:55):
Well, have we even like gone over that. Yeah, so
we got this mentally handicapped adult living on this farm
slash laboratory.

Speaker 3 (16:06):
Yeah, and a really nice cool area in.

Speaker 4 (16:08):
The back with his dad who is the caretaker. And
so Bruce Dern or not even Bruce Dern his assistant
Max or is he Max's this This relationship is complicated.

Speaker 3 (16:29):
I don't know who was whose assistant. Like they were
working together in the experiments.

Speaker 4 (16:34):
Because Max said, oh, I used to be a brilliant
doctor like yourself, and now you have to be my
hands or some bullshit like that. But yeah, after the
uh the sex past shows up. He he just you know,
they shoot him with a shotgun and then they're like, hey,
we get this other guy. We can put two heads

(16:56):
on him. That'd be crazy, right.

Speaker 3 (17:01):
It does seem like it's just two assholes going up,
Hey we can pull this off. You want to try,
just try. It's just like like frat boys who are like,
you know, decide to try to like throw a beer
across to the people in the other apartment building, and
they don't consider the consequences of what happens if it
doesn't make it. That's what these guys were, like, They're
just gonna sew the head on the guy. Let's sew
the head on the guy. Why not? And then they

(17:21):
chloroform the until he handicapped guy that's been living on
this property for his whole life.

Speaker 4 (17:29):
They act like he's like part of the family almost.

Speaker 3 (17:32):
Yeah, like it's it's one of those.

Speaker 4 (17:34):
Like come on, you're never gonna have another chance again.
And Bruce Dern's like all right, because.

Speaker 3 (17:40):
Like it's one of those weird setups like reminded me
of the original The Fly, where it's just like it's
this family, but it's like husband, wife, a caretaker. Like
two people live in this house, but they have a
full time caretaker, and then the caretaker's son lives there.
And then I'm not sure. I don't think the other
guy lived there, the other doctor scientist guys, Yeah, I
don't think he lived there. He just came by for work.

(18:03):
So but it's like, you know, so those are people
you're with all day every day, you know, who are
like using your pool on the weekends when they're not
being a caretaker and stuff, and then you just chloroform
this mentally handicapped guy just because it is like come on,
you know, like how often are you going to get
a chance to put a head on the guy.

Speaker 4 (18:23):
Yeah, and they have to chloroform him because he's so
upset because his maniac guy showed up and killed his dad. Yeah,
and they're just like, you know what, let's just chloroform.
It wasn't. Max at some point says he serves no purpose,
Let's use him as a scientific discovery, right, And I'm
just like Jesus christ Man.

Speaker 5 (18:43):
He is barely a person.

Speaker 4 (18:48):
I mean, it's fucking nineteen seventy one.

Speaker 3 (18:50):
Apparently, Yeah, right around the time that RFK Junior was
going to theaters. Now we know where his logic comes from.
Jesus anyways, sorry, yeah, yeah, yeah, that like it's weird
because the scientists all seem like perfectly normal guys. Like
it's the seventies, so I'm not really thinking about like

(19:11):
the fact that you shouldn't sew a second head on
a monkey. That doesn't occur to me in this type
of a film, you know what I mean. Like, and
then but then the turn where they're just like, yeah,
but what about that handicap guy, I'm like, well, that
seems pretty dark. I think when I was watching the movie,
it like it didn't strike me as odd because he
was wearing that bulky suit where you could see his

(19:31):
other clothes underneath. I just like the whole movie, I'm like,
that's the guy who's getting a second head, obviously, right,
and so like, I didn't really think about it, and
it wasn't until like later where I'm like, man, they
just chloroformed a handicap guy right in the middle of
this movie that's otherwise relatively tame, Like it's that's probably
the worst thing you see on camera.

Speaker 5 (19:50):
Do you guys feel like these movies lacked And I
suppose they're both pretty early seventies, but they lacked that
nineteen seventies like nihilism that's usually in all these movies.

Speaker 3 (20:05):
Well, and I also feel like they weren't They just
weren't dark enough. I would have loved to see at
least one of them be if it had been made
like a couple of years after the Texas Chainsubmaster instead
of a couple of years before, and you could have
still had it be comedic, but also insert that sort
of darkness to it and you know, a little bit
more gore and stuff like that.

Speaker 5 (20:27):
I mean, they also managed to make a movie that
and we'll talk about the next one. But where I went,
is this a black exploitation movie?

Speaker 3 (20:36):
I don't know, Like I can't say.

Speaker 5 (20:37):
I honestly, God can't tell.

Speaker 3 (20:39):
I've literally I've literally read reviews of it where they
say it is and reviews of it where they say
it isn't. Just like specifically trying to figure that out.
But anyways, that's the next movie. This movie has no
black people in it. They did not make that mistake
in this movie.

Speaker 4 (20:53):
Don't worry Jesus Christ.

Speaker 3 (20:57):
This movie is a very very white cast because even
like when they when the two headed monster thing is
going on its little rampage and like attacking teenagers in
their cars and stuff, it's very much like they were
they were not interested in having the discussion of it,
whether it was a black exploitation movie or not. There's
nobody in this movie that you don't that you think

(21:19):
is anything other than white. If to the point where
it feels intentional, I guess is why I'm saying it
that way.

Speaker 5 (21:26):
It's it's racist in the old fashioned racist way, not
as complicated. Is this racist or not? Ways?

Speaker 3 (21:32):
Yeah, No, it's it's racist in the way of like
we just won't put any black people in here and
then no one can be racist against them. See we
solved it. And you're like, oh, that doesn't really work.
But you know, what do you do is the seventies?
Good lord, that's a fair response.

Speaker 4 (21:52):
Bright, Was there any good kills? I don't really remember.

Speaker 2 (21:57):
No.

Speaker 3 (21:57):
That that that, to me is what was missing from
this was the horror element. Like I said, like, that's
what I was trying to hint at earlier. You needed
more violence, you needed more gore, you needed more like
there should have been like more scenes of them like
tearing open the door on those cars and the girls
inside screaming. Yeah, you know, I.

Speaker 4 (22:14):
Mean because this movie, I will say, does feel more
like a grindhouse movie, Like it is a lot more
even just the visual style of it's a lot more
gritty and sort of just gross looking. Yeah, that's the
thing in the next one, whereas the next one, I
feel like I could have stumbled across it a lot

(22:34):
on like the three o'clock movie on a Sunday back
in the day.

Speaker 3 (22:37):
That's how I knew it existed. I saw a little
bit of it like TV once. But yeah, I know,
like I agree with you, like this movie has that
look to it, But it's more just because it's low
budget and it came out at a narrow when low
budget meant shitty looking.

Speaker 4 (22:51):
So yeah, but then it doesn't really have the aspect
of what those movies sort of brought, which is gore.
I remember seeing a little bit of blood, like much,
not a lot, not enough. Yeah, yeah, and yeah, there's
no new to the as we said, probably the most
extreme thing I was talking about the maniac guy who
has escaped.

Speaker 3 (23:11):
Yeah, but he is like do you feel like this
movie could have been made in nineteen fifty five, because like,
even when that maniac is killing people, like most of
the killing is like just it's those scenes like from
the original wolf Man where you just see him grabbing
the guy around the neck and squeezing and everybody's going ah,
Like it's not really like you know it. They were

(23:36):
kills from a bygone era. I would say they were
done in this sort of innocent way, almost like this
movie was hoping to capture a mainstream audience and they
didn't want to scare away families or something.

Speaker 4 (23:49):
But they got to be able to bring the kids.

Speaker 3 (23:54):
Yeah, but it's a it's it's interesting. I really feel
like this could have been almost a universe so classic,
like it's it's such a weird subject matter that you know,
but then done in such a tame way. And then
like if it was black and white, I think it'd
be a lot more forgiving of the special effects and stuff. Yeah,

(24:14):
but yeah, for a nineteen seventy one film, it doesn't
look great. Like we know what other stuff from that
era could look like. It doesn't, so.

Speaker 5 (24:24):
Yeah, I think it it at points it feels a
lot more like some of the grimier stuff from the sixties.
I mean kind of yeah, that makes in something like uh,
what was that one snuff or whatever it was called?

Speaker 3 (24:39):
You know what I mean, But those tended to have
a level of violence and a little bit of I
don't know, like meanness to them, right right right.

Speaker 5 (24:48):
It's exactly that saying it had it. I don't know
it looked like it that.

Speaker 3 (24:53):
Yeah, because it was because it wasn't color. Yeah, But
then it's it's so it's sort of a mixture of
fifty style storytelling with sixties visuals but then came out
in the seventies. It's weird.

Speaker 5 (25:07):
Well it didn't and didn't have the violence that made
this stuff from the sixties interesting.

Speaker 3 (25:12):
Yeah, because that, like the sixties movies you're referencing are
the precursor to what we think of as seventies grindhouse cinema.
You know when you think of all of those ones
we've talked about a ton of them on this podcast,
where they're like they're dark and they're grimy, and they're
gritty and they're they're dirty. You know this isn't dirty.

(25:32):
Is you could show this movie to a kid. I mean,
a kid's probably not going to enjoy it, but there's
nothing in this that you couldn't show to a child today.
Kid would probably laugh at the bad special effects of
the two headed monster, which again, that's that's part of
the charm of going back to watching movies from the
fifties and previous to that. But it feels weird trying

(25:55):
to put that same charm into it in nineteen seventy
one film.

Speaker 4 (26:02):
You want to share anything else? Now? Is there anything
that you feel the riff tracks made better?

Speaker 5 (26:07):
Uh? No, Just the random jokes are just such a
vast improvement. But uh really, I can't like put my
finger on anything exact that I'd be like, oh, this
was the best. A lot of the jokes about seeing
the monkey's penis at the beginning of the movie were
where they kept going, oh my god, look at it's crotch. Oh,

(26:29):
and it's got two heads, but oh, it's crotch.

Speaker 3 (26:36):
I think I was so concentrated on the two heads
that I didn't notice lead down there.

Speaker 4 (26:41):
I didn't either, So all right, well, anything else, Doug
before we move on to the.

Speaker 3 (26:48):
No I think, like to sum it up, it's basically
a retelling of the Frankenstein story, except the monster has
two heads. Yeah, and you know, special effects aren't great,
but this two headed monkey in it so pretty good.
It was enough, Like it was enough to hold my
attention for the hour twenty six or whatever that it is.
I would say that it's not. If this was a

(27:09):
two hour movie, I probably would have hated it, but
I didn't, so.

Speaker 4 (27:14):
Uh, well, Noah, do you want to tell us about
the Thing with Two Heads?

Speaker 5 (27:18):
Sure?

Speaker 3 (27:18):
Uh?

Speaker 5 (27:19):
The Thing with Two Heads is the exact same movie,
but instead of a dumb guy, it's a black guy,
and instead of them randomly attaching a sex pest, it's
a rich guy who is also a racist.

Speaker 3 (27:37):
Did you love how in this movie it was so
important to have him be a racist that they had
like a three minute long scene of him like trying
to hire somebody, but then he finds out the guy
coming in for the job interview is black and just
refuses to hire him, and that scene just goes on
and on for several minutes, as like the black doctor

(27:58):
is like, no, look, we have any existing contract. You
offered me a contract over the phone before you do
I was black. You still have to pay me. I
still get to do this work and all, you know
what I mean, Like it's and you're like, this seems
like a lot for this type of movie. I'm like,
we get it. He's a bigot, Like we know now,
well I.

Speaker 5 (28:15):
Yeah, Like I said, the reason, the reason why I
was saying I'm not sure if it's a black exploitation
movie or not, is like there's certain shorthand used in
black exploitation movies that is not used in this movie.

Speaker 4 (28:30):
So he wasn't just running around dropping the end bomb
the whole time.

Speaker 5 (28:33):
Well, not just not just that, there's there's a level
of showing this almost fictionalized like respect between people of
color and that kind of stuff. It just doesn't exist
in this It's it's played. It's hard to say this,
but kind of in a more serious tone that you'd

(28:55):
expect it to be, while the white guy's racism and
stuff is not. It's just very strange. I don't I
don't know how to describe it.

Speaker 3 (29:05):
It's almost like you've got the thing with two heads.
The black guy is for a black exploitation movie, but
the white guy isn't, and they're both on the same body.

Speaker 5 (29:18):
Yeah, like, because I don't, Like I said, it's very strange.
It's hard to describe what what tonally is that's weird
about it. But I like the black exploitation stuff from
the seventies, and I personally feel like this doesn't fit.
Like it's close. It's just different.

Speaker 3 (29:39):
Does they know anything about the director? Is this a
black exploitation movie but made by a white guy? Is
that what happened?

Speaker 1 (29:45):
I don't know.

Speaker 4 (29:48):
I was gonna say it does feel more meanstream, if
that makes sense.

Speaker 3 (29:56):
It's it's like, well the quality filmmaker, I would say that,
like the it feels less amateurish. It looks crisper and cleaner.

Speaker 5 (30:08):
Yeah. Yeah, it's just strange, and it's so the movie
itself is racist, but in a weirdly, like specific way.
Where you can tell the movie is trying to villainize
the racist people, but at the same time it's just
being racist. It's very strange. I don't know how to

(30:29):
explain it.

Speaker 3 (30:30):
I think you just did. I think it's like and
part of that problem is, like we're watching this in
twenty twenty five, and maybe in nineteen seventy two, just
making the white guy the bad guy and the black
guys the good guys was enough to almost count as progressiveness, right, sure,
maybe you know, and now we're like we're looking at
it going, well, you still shouldn't say some of those

(30:51):
things on camera.

Speaker 4 (30:55):
All right. So Lee Frost, who's the director, while not
being a specific a blaxploitation director, really dog's about to
knock shit over my office? Well, not specifically being a
exploitation director, is definitely an exploitation director, okay, because he

(31:17):
directed such films as Hollywood's World of Flesh from nineteen
sixty three, Okay, The Defilers from nineteen sixty five, The
Forbidden Hot Spur, and then a little movie we uh
definitely would remember called Love Camp seven. Yeah, okay, such

(31:38):
movies as Slaves in Cages, Chain Gang Women.

Speaker 5 (31:43):
I see, I see what the problem is here. You
couldn't make a good movie because there wasn't enough rape
six stuff for him to like I could get into
his ouvra.

Speaker 3 (31:55):
No. Instead, they had just spent forty five minutes of
the movie in one police chase's you know what I mean,
that's more important time it is.

Speaker 5 (32:02):
It is half the movie. It's fucking wild.

Speaker 3 (32:05):
It's it really feels like they filmed like a bunch
of stuff with the idea of on the using half
of it, and then they're like, how are we going
at this movie to feature length? Just put all of
it in.

Speaker 4 (32:15):
I was gonna say the last half of the movie
does turn into a Duke's the Hazard episode.

Speaker 3 (32:19):
Yeah, but like.

Speaker 4 (32:20):
Theacing and then the cop car will do something insane
like flip over them.

Speaker 5 (32:26):
Duke boys have been surgically attached to each other.

Speaker 3 (32:30):
Because it is it is very like like the Thing
with two Heads runs into like a motorcycle race and
one of the motorcyclists like sees them and panics and
falls over. So now it's riding around on a motorcycle
and every day it is doing the whole thing where
like they jump over a gorge and the cops trying
to follow them, but the cop car can't jump as
good as their motorcycle can jump and all that stuff.

(32:54):
And it is by the way they're doing all these
jumps with it is so it's you know, the guy
with the second head, and then the doctor that they've
brought along with them, the black doctor that the racist
was forced to hire, is there with them, like holding
on in the pack the whole time, which is pretty funny.

Speaker 5 (33:11):
And I liked it.

Speaker 4 (33:11):
The main guy is constant. You're like, come on, man,
you know you got to help me, right, Let does
white man tell you what to do?

Speaker 5 (33:18):
He's like, listen, we can work together. I'll give you credit.
And the guy's like I didn't do anything. And he's like, yeah,
but I'll just give you credit. It'll be good. And
he's like, you don't understand why I wouldn't be into that.

Speaker 3 (33:31):
Like there is a line of dialogue somewhere in that
just made me cringe so hard, where like the racist
white head is just like he says something like, isn't
it what you people like getting credit me? You don't
have to do any work or anything, and yeah, and
I was just like, ah, like I had to like
stop for a minute. I'm like, Jesus Christ, what just
got said?

Speaker 4 (33:53):
He said shit like that all throughout the movie because interesting,
I find. The interesting thing is is race isn't just
full out being a like offensive. He's still offensive, but
not like just like a yelling bigot where he's just
yelling racial racial ship the entire time.

Speaker 5 (34:14):
Yeah, it's like a realistic casual racism.

Speaker 4 (34:18):
It's that.

Speaker 3 (34:18):
Yeah, it's that thing where he like, he's not He's like, look,
it's not that I don't want to hire black people.
It's that I find I know that black people are lazy,
and I can't be hiring lazy people, so that's the
only reason. And he thinks by saying that that everybody
else is going to go along with it, and you're like, no, no, no, no,
that's what racism is. He almost it's like his racism

(34:39):
doesn't have an ill intent, if that makes sense. He's
it's just so ingrained in who he is as a
person that.

Speaker 4 (34:46):
He spouts as if it's like scientific fact, like everybody
knows it.

Speaker 3 (34:51):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (34:52):
Yeah, so yeah, it's it's interesting.

Speaker 3 (34:56):
So anyways, Yeah.

Speaker 4 (34:58):
And the actor who I should have looked his name
up before I started speaking. Oh, it's Ray miland I
didn't even recognize him because he's got great hair. He's
he's really good in this. Yeah. And then the black
guy is played by Rosie Grere, who was a football player. Yeah,

(35:19):
less good.

Speaker 3 (35:20):
He's pretty good.

Speaker 4 (35:21):
The other doctor, that's true. The other doctor, doctor Williams.
He's really good too. But it's just kind of funny
how they're supposed to be attached to the same body.
One of them is like a really good actor and
then the other one's like doing the best he can,
but it's obvious this is not his first first career.

Speaker 3 (35:40):
No, and that was their way of getting around having
to put a guy in a big suit with a
guy that's already huge, so that you can make it
look quick. He has a second head.

Speaker 4 (35:48):
Yeah, some of the special effects are hilarious, though, when
it's when it's Rosie Greer running around and he just
has a fake head attached to him, I'm just like
Jesus Christ.

Speaker 3 (35:59):
I love it. Was the one towards the end where
they're down in like the basement lab or whatever it is,
and it's not a lab, but it's like a makeship
lab that it puts it up down there and he's
running up down the stairs and the thing is just
like flopping back and forth. And I kept thinking of, like,
you know how like every Halloween there's one asshole who
does the thing where he dresses like Mo and then
he's got the other two heads of the other two
stooches on each shoulder.

Speaker 4 (36:20):
That was about the quality of it, as we learned
from Roseanne.

Speaker 3 (36:24):
Yeah, but that yeah.

Speaker 4 (36:27):
Yeah, it's like he could just like, why doesn't he
just reach over and just tear the head off. Looks
like it's about to fall off anyway.

Speaker 3 (36:34):
Anyways.

Speaker 4 (36:35):
But of course they make numerous like if you do that,
you'd be like killing yourself. Can't just do that?

Speaker 3 (36:42):
Well, and there is It is an interesting thing because
the villain, the racist white guy of the movie, his
whole plan this whole time, which we learned from the beginning.
We haven't talked about the gorilla yet. We still have
to go back to that, but we learned that his
plan was transplant his head on there, and after like
twenty eight days, for some reason, the body acclimates and

(37:03):
then you can remove the other head and he can
just have the body. That's the plan this whole time,
and he has no issues ethically with that whatsoever, right,
And then it is the other guys like the uh,
the convict played by Rosie Greer and the other doctor

(37:24):
who are like, we can't just remove his head. That'd
be murdering him. Like he's still a living person even
though he's this terrible bigot and his body's gone. We
can't if we just pull that head off and toss
it in the trash, that's a murder and we don't
want to be murderers. So it's you know, there's a
little bit of depth there, not a lot.

Speaker 5 (37:42):
I was gonna say, I will see this too. They
made an effort in the writing to make it functional
in the fact that you know, the character who they're
initially going to kill is on death row and said
to be executed, right, and and then of course he's innocence.
Then that's where, yeah, it goes haywire.

Speaker 3 (38:04):
Yeah, there is like there is a thing where this
where it's like I don't want to say I agree
with the racist white scientists, but there is a thing
of like, look, look, at some point you want if
you're going to try to do this experiment, they do
go looking for somebody who is going to be put
to death and it's like, hey, if you volunteer for this,

(38:25):
you get to live twenty eight days longer than you
were gonna basically, And it's like, I mean, it's it's something.
It's close. It's closer to ethical than almost any other
way to get a human body to put your head on.
It's like, hey, look, you're gonna die anyway. You want
to live for twenty eight extra days, you let us
do our experiment on you.

Speaker 5 (38:43):
Well, and even initially what they're trying to do, they're
trying to find somebody who has like terminal brain cancer
but it hasn't spread to their body.

Speaker 3 (38:52):
Right, Yeah, at one point that's the goal.

Speaker 5 (38:54):
Yeah, it's like, okay, no, I kind of get I
get what they're going for.

Speaker 3 (38:59):
Yeah, I mean it's it's I don't want to say
it's ethical, but it's more ethical than like just trapping
somebody off the street and chopping their head off so
you can put your head on their body.

Speaker 5 (39:11):
It's and like I said, before the podcast started, I
was talking to Brian about the fact that so this
this exact movie apparently has been made forty five times, Okay,
and in my opinion, they're all just variations of the
philosophical experiment the Violinist placed into action as a movie,

(39:35):
which just is a it's an ethical mental experiment. I mean,
I think most of them don't seem to do a
very good job of exploring what that experiment is supposed
to illustrate.

Speaker 3 (39:48):
But because okay, if you like, let's pretend for a
moment that this scientist was a decent human being and
that they didn't go out of your way to make
him this horrible racist. Right, So, if you got a
guy who's going to die anyway, and you can take
this guy who's a great scientist and a great surgeon

(40:08):
and extend his life by transplanting his head onto that guy,
that's an interesting Now you're into like, Okay, yeah, we
are still killing this guy, but he was going to
die anyway, and we're actually doing something good by extending
the life of somebody who's then going to go on
and perform surgery and save more lives. Right, Like, that's
where it would become interesting if the movie was interested

(40:28):
in delving into that ethical debate. But instead they're just
like the guy from Death Rowe was innocent and the
guy that wants his body as a horrible racist. So
villain good guy problem solved.

Speaker 5 (40:40):
Oh well, and again, but if I'm correct, and this
is the violinist problem. Part of the violinist problem is
that the it's an ethical dilemma for the person who
has had the other person attached to them. Does that
make sense?

Speaker 3 (40:56):
No, put it in terms of the characters, so we
know what you mean.

Speaker 5 (41:00):
So the violinist problem is as such, you wake up
one morning and you have had attached to you via
whatever tubes and shit, a person, right, And the idea is,
do you have the right to detach those tubes if
it kills the other person? And the answer almost unequivocally

(41:23):
is yes, right, like it's your body. That's the whole
idea of bodily autonomy, that you cannot be forced to
sustain another person. And then the reason why it's called
the violinist is usually then it expands to, well, what
if the person's like a concert violinist that was like
the old eighteen hundred version of it, or now you'd

(41:44):
be like, you know for a fact that that person
would be able to cure cancer, could you still detach
them and let them die? And of course the answer
still is yes. Like it just says yes, which is wild,
but yeah, that's that's the entire thing. So the violence
is always it's the reason why it almost always is

(42:05):
the good person's body with the whatever person attached to them.
Right does that? Does that make sense?

Speaker 3 (42:11):
You know? In both these movies it's a relatively innocent
person with a bad person attached to them for the
sake of the because if it went the other way,
I think it'd be a little easier to decide too,
the good guy in the Bye Guys, Right, yeah, exactly.
So what do we think of the solution they came
up with in this movie of remove the evil white

(42:31):
guy's head and put it on a table attached to
machines to keep it alive, and then get a car
and sing a song.

Speaker 4 (42:38):
What are you fact?

Speaker 5 (42:39):
Pretty good?

Speaker 3 (42:40):
It is a good workaround, and it's real fun to
watch that actors just head sticking through an obvious hole
at a table, just screaming at the people who find it.

Speaker 5 (42:50):
Get me a new body, get me a new body,
and me a newbody.

Speaker 3 (42:54):
I really enjoyed. I really enjoyed that scene of them
just coming in and again it's I won't use the
word it's good because you can clearly tell they just
cut a small hole at a table and put a
guy's head through it, put a white sheet around them.
But it's real fun.

Speaker 4 (43:11):
I had a lot of fun with this movie. I
feel like this one played a lot better for me
than the other one. Did you know? I don't know
if it's just because it's a cranky old white racist
guy and you do like those players, really.

Speaker 5 (43:27):
You really enjoyed the racism of it.

Speaker 4 (43:30):
Well, no, you didn't even let me finish my sentence
because the second half was and then big black football
player guy and them just arguing the whole time, and
the football player guy just like sort of a bitch. Oh.

Speaker 5 (43:41):
This definitely of the two movies, this definitely is the
better movie. I So I won't call it a good movie.
I think that's it's a little far. It's pushing it.
But I will say I had fun watching it, Like, yeah,
I didn't get done and go, goddamn it, you guys,
maybe watch this fucking movie.

Speaker 4 (43:59):
Yeah, of too, This one is definitely more fun then, Yeah,
I did.

Speaker 3 (44:04):
It was late last night when I tried to watch
this one too, so I had to turn it off
and watch the second half of like six this morning
before my kid woke up and like it. I was
really enjoying laying in bed at six o'clock in the morning,
half awake, watching them like the second half of that car.

Speaker 4 (44:17):
Chase, police cars reckon to each other.

Speaker 3 (44:24):
Yeah, like all that stuff's funn It goes on for
way too long, just objectively, but you know, I bet
maybe if I hadn't cut that car Chase in half,
it felt way too long for me.

Speaker 4 (44:33):
But it is.

Speaker 3 (44:35):
Yeah, it's I don't know, like all the stuff of
like when they go and they like there's something about
the innocence of the film when they go see the
football player's girlfriend and they walk in and she freaks out,
and they're like, what are you freaking out about? He's
got a second head on his shoulder, Like that's going
to freak some people out. You should have been prepared

(44:55):
for that. Like, it's I love it.

Speaker 4 (44:58):
I like her her first first question is are there
two of anything else?

Speaker 5 (45:03):
She's very fun. And then I like the fact that
he tries to like get her into bed and she's like, no,
you've got a second head.

Speaker 4 (45:11):
On your body.

Speaker 3 (45:12):
You can't do that.

Speaker 4 (45:13):
No, he just looks, He just looks at the other
head and he's like, you gotta go.

Speaker 5 (45:17):
He goes, yeah, you gotta go, and of course raises
this guy going to his dead all you people think about,
and it's like, fucking isn't that all anybody thinks about?

Speaker 3 (45:31):
I think I was on death row, and you know,
he just finally gets to see his girlfriend again. Of course, like.

Speaker 4 (45:38):
Anyways, any other favorite parts.

Speaker 3 (45:41):
I mean, we haven't talked about the gorilla at the beginning,
when that fucking two headed gorilla escapes and just they're like,
oh no, the gorilla's on the loose, and I'm because
the gorilla gonna kill some motherfuckers. Nah, just goes to
the grocery store looking for fruit. Just you have to
break in and fucking dart it in the middle of
the grocery store. I love that.

Speaker 4 (46:03):
Moment, sideways down the sidewalk the whole time.

Speaker 3 (46:10):
Yeah, a gorilla was having a great day. It was
so fun to watch. And then I love when they
because because of the lack of technology from the era,
the second head is always way off to one side.
But then when they supposedly removed the original head from
the gorilla, somehow the second head magically transports to the
middle and no one can even tell that there used

(46:34):
to be a second head. Something about that made me
laugh real hard.

Speaker 4 (46:38):
Perfect spinal alignment.

Speaker 3 (46:39):
Yeah, I really enjoyed that.

Speaker 5 (46:44):
So that to me, that sweet, sweet nonsense, because.

Speaker 3 (46:48):
Again, this isn't a long movie, right, this is a
short movie. So it's like you're giving me a gorilla
sneaking out of a science lab so that it can
go to the grocery store and get some free food.
Like that's that's sustains like a solid percentage of this movie.
Not as much as that car chase, not the forty
eight percent of the movie that is a car chase.

Speaker 5 (47:07):
But well, I also do really enjoy that they make
a big point out of the technology that allows this
has to do with perfect spinal alignment. I did somebody
tell the people making the movie that you only have
one spine?

Speaker 3 (47:25):
Listen, have you gone to the goof section on the
IMDb page for this movie? No?

Speaker 5 (47:29):
I have somebody that is that the main topic of
discussion that there is only one spine.

Speaker 3 (47:35):
It's not specific to the spine, because there's a lot
of other issues that have come up to but they
point out it says like if smoke is breathed in
by one head, and exhaled by the other. Then there
must be connection in the lungs. But then if the
second head can talk, there has to be a second
voice box because can both talk or can both talk
at the same time. We're not sure. They'll get into

(47:57):
the science of that, and it says.

Speaker 4 (48:00):
It's really trying to break down the medici.

Speaker 3 (48:03):
It really says, in spite of this science jargon, there
is no evidence that any anything but the head was transplanted.
So somebody went through the effort of typing this into
MTV of like, wait a second, this science in this
movie isn't entirely I.

Speaker 5 (48:18):
Like to imagine they're an actual medical doctor and they're like, God,
damn it, another one of these fucking movies. So I
have to say it, you've only got one set of
vocal cords.

Speaker 3 (48:34):
But yeah, so, so we know that scientifically this is
unlikely to occur in real life. The only way we're
going to see it is if they remake these Well,
when they remake these.

Speaker 4 (48:42):
Movies, someone just buys up the rights to like three
of these movies and just combines them all together. Yeah
why not, except they put like the the simple version
and the races together, So it makes no sense.

Speaker 3 (49:05):
I just can't wait till the crossover where they fight
the remake of basket Case.

Speaker 5 (49:11):
How dare you basket Case is a much better film?

Speaker 3 (49:14):
Yes, objectively correct? Yes. The one thing watching these movies
from a twenty twenty five perspective that I think people
just weren't thinking of in nineteen seventy one or seventy two.
So male body to male heads, he him or they them?
Because you know, people want.

Speaker 4 (49:34):
To know it's a good question.

Speaker 3 (49:39):
I will tell you that in the Wikipedia page for
one of them, it actually suggests going by them. So
I think, you know, whatever committee decides the politically correct
terms really needs to get on this before the remake occurs.

Speaker 4 (49:59):
Because suddenly MAGA decides nineteen seventy two movie The Thing
with Two Heads is fucking woke bullshit.

Speaker 7 (50:10):
Thanks for calling the Midnight Driving No one is here
to take you call. For more info, check out the
Midnight drive In on Twitter at MMn drive in pod,
or find us on Facebook. If you one to email us,
send it to the Midnight Drive In at gmail dot com.
Remember no outside food and drink. Anyone cut performing sexual

(50:31):
accent the drive in will immediately be taken to the office, unspeakable.
Thanks will be done to you, Thanks for calling.

Speaker 4 (50:42):
All right, what did everybody watch this last episode?

Speaker 5 (50:45):
Uh? Not much? A couple episodes of poker Face talking
about poker Face before it's good.

Speaker 3 (50:58):
You enjoy it, keep telling us we should watch it.
We don't watch it.

Speaker 4 (51:03):
That's about That's about rent On Peacock. So I've heard
they're about to do a price increase.

Speaker 5 (51:08):
So I've got it because I've got a bundle that's
like what Peacock Max and something else for like sixteen
dollars a month.

Speaker 4 (51:23):
Yeah, did you watch anything done?

Speaker 3 (51:27):
I watched one movie?

Speaker 4 (51:28):
Okay, because.

Speaker 3 (51:32):
We're gonna have to discuss it in detail, because just
yelling it sucks isn't good enough when you're talking about
the I know what you did last summer.

Speaker 4 (51:39):
That's right, I forgot it's.

Speaker 3 (51:42):
It's so much worse than what you're thinking.

Speaker 4 (51:45):
Really, so well, I think it's pretty bad, because.

Speaker 3 (51:49):
Hey, what if I told you this? What if I
told you that? First of all, the the whole concept
of the original movie is these young kids do this
stupid shit, right, So what if I told you that
in this movie they're like in their twenties, they're annoying
influencer types, and they're all like they're high school friends
that have gotten back together for like an engagement party.

(52:10):
So all of the sympathy of being young and stupid
goes out the window right away. So none of your
main characters are sympathetic in any way, because why the
fuck would they be when they're these assholes who talk
like they want to be influencers and you're like, okay,
so that's wrong, right. And to top it off, instead
of it just being like a thing where they cover

(52:30):
the body themselves, the one guy's rich dad covers it
up for them. So even less sympathetic, I guess is
the goal. And we come to find out later in
the movie that he's been covering up a lot of
stuff because they're doing like the they're like they're playing
off like the Halloween idea that the murders from ninety
seven are this big deal that people still care about,

(52:52):
and it's like, no, again, it was like three murders
and it only affected a certain friend group, Like the
rest of the town is not going to be affected
by the thirty years later, that's stupid. We established that
it was stupid in the previous in that other franchise,
so there's no need to go over that again here.
And then you guys know that I can't abide really

(53:16):
lazy writing. So the movie opens, this group of friends
is getting back together for this engagement party. They all
go up to this cliff to like watch the Fourth
of July fireworks accident happens, and then they disperse, and
then like a year later they're going to come back together,
and that's there where they get the notes. Right, what

(53:38):
if I told you that when they get back together
it's for another engagement party for the same fucking character
who's now marrying a different person.

Speaker 4 (53:48):
What what the fuck?

Speaker 3 (53:51):
Man? Who the fuck allowed me to get into a movie?

Speaker 5 (53:54):
I would say, Unfortunately, statistically that's realistic.

Speaker 3 (53:57):
It's like ge Jesus Christ fucking so fucking dumb, so
fucking dumb. All right, what if I told you this? Okay,
we already established that the accident gets covered up by
like the one guy's rich daddy who's been covering up
everything negative that goes on in town because he's in
real estate and he wants real estate prices to go

(54:19):
up and whatever. Right, but the accident in question is
like nobody's drunk driving. The guy is standing in the
middle of the road when a car comes and the
car swerves to avoid him and goes off a cliff.
Why even cover that up? Like what, like, what are

(54:39):
you even covering up? If the guys, if the guy's like,
if your dad is so rich that he can cover
up the fact that you were there at all, then
you're not going to get any serious consequences for just
being in the middle of the road because you were
parked on the side to watch fireworks on the fourth
of July. Like, what are you even covering up? It
makes no fucking sense. So the whole premise of the

(55:01):
movie is just so fucking dumb, right, and you're just like,
oh my god, like what the fuck? So then you're
just like finally you're like okay, and the notes start
coming and you're like, all right, at least there'll be
some kills, and the kills are they're okay. If you
were watching this movie for free at home, you would
not complain about the CGI. But when you when you

(55:24):
like I would, I would say put the CGI is
almost on par with that movie Hard Eyes that came
out a while back, except the difference is this is
a major franchise, and that was like a low budget
thing that kind of just caught everybody's attention. And also,
not all of the kills in that other movie were cgi,
whereas basically all the ones here are. What if I

(55:47):
told you that in this movie there's a So there's
first of all, there's a podcaster character that shows up,
I think just because they think podcasters are cool spoiler alert,
they're not.

Speaker 4 (55:58):
We're not.

Speaker 3 (56:00):
But so she shows up in this movie and you're thinking, okay,
Like in my head, she's like a true crime podcaster.
I'm like, okay, she's gonna help these characters learn about
the previous murders or she's gonna like figure out part
of the crime, Like she's gonna be involved in the investigation.
Now she shows up and like the day after they
like they call her to help with the investigation, and
then she's just killed on the first day, and you're like, so,

(56:23):
then why is this character in this movie? And then
to top it off, like she's killed with the fish
hook it's like fish hook and then hang her and
throw her outside of the building, and they police cover
it up by saying it was a suicide. As if
all of the people who saw the body hanging outside
wouldn't have noticed that it was cut open with the
fish hook, And you're just like, what is going on? Right?

(56:48):
And then okay, so the podcaster is wearing a T
shirt Sarah Michelle Geller's face on it. Right. So later
in the movie, then they go to the graveyard and oh,
there's the picture of Sarah Michelle Geller and Ryan philipp
from the first movie. Right, all right, so obviously they're
setting us up here. There's gonna be some kind of

(57:10):
a flashback or something, and they want to remind us
of that character's existence and the fact that she's in
the movie. The appearance of Sarah Michelle Geller comes in
the form of a dream sequence by one of the
new characters, who would not have been alive to have
ever met that character. So, I mean, I get wanting

(57:33):
to have Sarah Michelle Geller in your movie because she's
better than everything else in this movie. But that's what
you come up with, is this character having a dream
because she's seen a couple of pictures of her.

Speaker 4 (57:46):
See, I had heard she had a cameo, like she
showed up in a dream sequence, so I assumed it
was a Jennifer Love hewittt dream and apparently I was wrong.

Speaker 3 (57:56):
No, it's it's the fucking like our quotes Survivor girl
from The New One cast right, Like, it's it's just
shit like that. I just like, how how do you
fucking do that in your movie? How do you have
a movie where the so the climatemactic battle between the
well not I guess it's not the climactic battle, but

(58:17):
it's part of the climactic battle between the main characters
and the two it's two killers that are revealed eventually,
and they're on a boat and they like two different
people go flying off the boat in the middle of
the ocean, one of whom apparently was shot but that
might have been a fake thing, and the other one
who was like knocked off by the killers. Either of

(58:38):
those people die, one we just get dialogue saying they're
probably still alive, and the other one just later in
the movie just washes up on shore like nothing fucking happened, Like,
what the fuck is going on in this stupid ass movie?
Like where do you get off doing this? Right? It is,
like it's just unacceptable. It's I can't fucking believe it.

(59:03):
This movie is so stupid that when Okay, so the
two girls that survived to the end, right, they're there
and they literally have a line of dialogue, and I
think this is supposed to be the message of the movie.
It's like, you know, this whole thing could have been
avoided if men would just learn to go to therapy. Okay, fine,
like whatever, it's twenty twenty five, you say, dumb shit
like that? What if I told you there was two

(59:24):
killers in this movie, one male, one female. So where
the fuck do you even get off saying that? How
do you do that? How how can you be so
stupid in your writing to put that in? Like, oh
my god, it was just offensively bad. It is just like,
like it is just unacceptable. It's I can't.

Speaker 4 (59:44):
Trailer looks awful. Yeah, that sounds even worse.

Speaker 3 (59:48):
It's it's the thing is like the trailer looked awful,
and I intentionally didn't watch the second trailer because I'm like,
what's the point. And then I was just really bored,
and I like, I'd seen a couple of reviews where
they said, oh, it's just a fun slodh, and I
was like, I was bored and I wanted to go
to the movies, and I couldn't find anything else to
go see, and so I'm like, the hell with it,
Like I'll just go right It's like ten o'clock on

(01:00:09):
a Thursday night, Like what else am I going to do?
And I was. I almost walked out in the first
fifteen minutes with stuff with the accident being so stupid
and everything, forced myself to stay kind of regretted it.
I mean, a couple of the kills are okay but
not great. I will say that the Legacy cast, like
Freddy Prince Junior and Jennifer love Hewitt are really doing

(01:00:32):
their best to be actors in this movie. They are
trying given the script that they've got in front of them.
I don't think anybody else was trying. So they really
stand out because of that any and same thing with
Sarah Michelle Geller. Like the Legacy cast, I think was
approaching this as if we're making a real movie. I'm
not sure anyone else was. Like the writers weren't, the

(01:00:53):
director wasn't, the modern actors weren't so and it's just
like I don't it's so it's so the Jennifer lovehew
character has there's a like a mini plot where it's
like they want her to come back and help them
figure out who the killer is, but she's sworn never
to return to that town because of what happened to her.

(01:01:14):
I'll never go back there.

Speaker 4 (01:01:16):
Twice.

Speaker 3 (01:01:17):
Yeah, except also she teaches out to college and they
point out that that's forty five minutes away.

Speaker 4 (01:01:25):
Like, if you.

Speaker 3 (01:01:28):
Fucking sworn to never return to a town for the
rest of your life because of all the trauma you
endured and that you you just can't handle it, you
don't get a job that's on the same mass transit
lines as the town you're trying to avoid, Like what
the hell, Like she could fall asleep on the bus
on the way home and accidentally return to the town.

(01:01:48):
Jesus Christ, just fucking nonsense. But it's just, I mean,
it's just because they have this idea that we don't
want her to be there, but also we need her,
We need characters to be able to go talk to
her and then come back to town, and so obviously
they can't be getting on a plane, right, So fucking stupid,
just so fucking dumb. And there's like there's this backplot

(01:02:09):
of like her and the Freddy Prince Junior character hate
each other now because they got married or whatever and
then it didn't work out. But there's never any discussion
as to like why. It's just like, I guess built
in that you just have to hate your ex, like
completely hate them to the point where it's like, there's
murders happening, should we help these kids out? And they
get mad at each other in the middle of that,
rather than fucking like just maybe put aside your bullshit

(01:02:31):
when there's some murder happening. Ah, just so fucking dumb,
just bad. That Freddie Prince Junior character runs a bar
now and you're like, well, wasn't he a fisherman in
the previous movies? How do you make that transition? Don't
you again? Line of dialogue as to why he's now
running a bar? I don't know. That might help. He
runs like a dive bar too, and the because his

(01:02:55):
character is connected to one of the group of friends
by way of like she works for him and he
was catering the engagement party at the end the opening
of the movie. But then I'm like, wait a minute,
I don't know a lot about like rich people. But
they get the guy from the local dive bar to
cater their party, is that what happens? And they like,

(01:03:15):
is there only one bartender in this Like nobody else
in town can get the bartender license. It's like New
York City's like cab license things that people like fight over.
It's like it's like, no anybody every time there's a
bar open in this town for any kind of event.
I'm the only person who cant a bartend. But that
doesn't make what the fuck? Why like it again? Just
try when you're writing your script, do a second draft,

(01:03:37):
put a little effort into it. God damn it. It
was so bad. I just I couldn't. Like, if the
kills had been great, then I'd have been like, okay,
but when your kills are mediocre, and then I got
to put up with all this other shit, just unfucking acceptable.
And then it has the nerve to set itself up
for a sequel at the end, and I'm like, no,
you better fucking not.

Speaker 4 (01:03:58):
Well, I don't think it's gonna happen because it bombed
at the box.

Speaker 3 (01:04:02):
Office weirdly enough, like when I went, the theater was
half full at ten thirty on a Thursday night, So
I was like, oh, what if this is a hit, but.

Speaker 4 (01:04:14):
We see if the Urban Legend reboot works better.

Speaker 3 (01:04:18):
I mean, it's not gonna work worse.

Speaker 4 (01:04:23):
There's not one in the works as far as I know.
But this is just the train apparently we're on at
the moment.

Speaker 3 (01:04:30):
I agree, so well. The thing is like Scream did
well by doing something a little different and a little original,
by having interesting new characters stuff like that. It's like
it didn't do well because because of name recognition. I
guess if that makes sense. Yeah, And it's just like, fuck,

(01:04:52):
like I don't know. Well, That's the other thing in
this movie is like the opening kill, like the very
first kill that happens after the when the group is
getting back together is it's the new fiance of the
girl who's had two engagement parties in the first fifteen
minutes of the movie. It's and it starts with like

(01:05:12):
he's like downstairs alone and he hears something and he
throws the lights on and lights open up over the
pool in the back, and I'm like, this is an
obvious reference to Scream, like the first kill and Scream
where Drew Barrymore turns on the lights and you see
everything lit up in the pool and then members turns
it back off, turns it back on, the boyfriend's out
there and stuff. But you don't reference Scream in your

(01:05:33):
I know what you did last Summer reboot. That's not
what you're supposed to be referencing a different movie. You
know that, right, Like you understand that Scream and I
know you did Less Summer are two different movies. But
it's like you don't reference the movie that the movie
you're rebooting was ripping off. That's what the fuck are
you doing?

Speaker 5 (01:05:51):
Ah?

Speaker 3 (01:05:52):
Just and it was just I was just bombarded with
shit like that.

Speaker 4 (01:05:58):
I'm glad I had zero interest and do not plan
on watching it.

Speaker 3 (01:06:02):
I should have watched the second trailer. But if I'd
watched the second trailer, I would have just stayed home
that night and stared at the walls.

Speaker 4 (01:06:08):
It was the second one. Did the first one have
the dude turn in the lights on by the pool
because I remember seeing that.

Speaker 3 (01:06:15):
I don't think it did.

Speaker 5 (01:06:16):
Oh yeah, I don't know.

Speaker 4 (01:06:18):
Because then the harpoon comes through the window and goes
through her shoulder.

Speaker 3 (01:06:22):
Yeah no, I didn't see that. If I that's probably
like that might be the best killed in the movie
where it's and it's mildly entertaining. I'll give it that.
I'll give it like the middle part of the movie
where people are being killed is it's not as bad
as everything else. I'm saying it's not good, But it's
like there's that scene where he's downstairs and he gets

(01:06:43):
the harpoon through the shoulder, the what you're talking about,
And she's upstairs and she's this really prissy, annoying, fucking
you just want to bitch slaper the whole movie. But
she's like laying in a bathtub listening to like a
meditation thing through her headphones, so she has no idea
this is happening downstairs, and they cut back to her
a couple of times and she's like listening to this

(01:07:03):
like positivity through it, like cause she's one of these
like spoiled rich kids who thinks that their life is
stressful when it's not. And it's like okay, So you're like, okay,
at least that's that's something. At least you're trying something here.
It's just not good enough to offset all the shittiness
of the rest of the movie. They go, so they

(01:07:25):
go to the dress shop that Sarah Michelle Geller worked
out in the first movie, and like the idea is
the town has become this kind of touristy town over
the years. And so they get there and it's now
it's a fancy restaurant, right, And they sneak in. It's
one of the girls and then the podcaster girl that
was supposed to be relevant. So they're walking around it's like,

(01:07:46):
what is now a restaurant, trying to like talk about
how like kills happened here or whatever. Right, killer shows up.
They run upstairs upstairs of the restaurant full of the
fucking mannequins from when it was a dress shop thirty
years earlier, just because somebody wants that visual of them
running around the mannequins. But like you're telling me, they
converted this whole building and restaurant, added a commercial kitchen

(01:08:10):
and like fucking delivery doors at the back that you
would need for a restaurant everything, but didn't bother to
get to the mannequins, just threw them upstairs for thirty
fucking years or whatever it's been. God damn it, just
fucking lazy ass.

Speaker 5 (01:08:23):
For those mannequins could be worth money, I don't know,
just what fucking no it's.

Speaker 3 (01:08:29):
Just oh I was I was like, as I was
watching it, I was thinking, like, I have to tell
the guys, like they're gonna want to know how bad
this is.

Speaker 5 (01:08:41):
It's just I have to warn them. I have to
go back.

Speaker 3 (01:08:47):
Fuck. It was just I couldn't, Like, I don't know
how you respect yourself if you're the writer or a
director of this movie. I don't like and like the
dialogue is the last thing I can say about the
dialogue is if you've ever watched those videos where it's
like a dad with like his teenage daughters in the
back and he'll pull up through a drive through and

(01:09:08):
then he'll place the order using all teenage slang, and
then they have a camera on the girls watching them react.
Imagine the guys who imagine that, but imagine that that's
how our characters are speaking. Yeah, and you're just like
what the fuck again? And give it?

Speaker 2 (01:09:25):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (01:09:26):
Just fuck shit man. Just like I wasn't able to
watch movies after this. Like I sat down a couple
of times in front of my TV to watch a
movie after this, and I couldn't bring myself to do it.
It's like ended up watching like.

Speaker 5 (01:09:43):
They've taken they have taken the joy of film.

Speaker 3 (01:09:47):
Yeah, like it did it. Like I I had to
like watch like Trailer Park Boys and shit, like to
just like like what's something that's just like dumb and short?
And I could just watching like a little bit to
like cleanse my palette. So hopefully I'll be back to
watching movies by next week. But my fucking god, I was.

(01:10:08):
I was so angry.

Speaker 4 (01:10:10):
I've been watching a lot of reaction videos lately, okay,
And I found one called Popcorn in Bed with this
girl who hosts it. Uh, I say, girl, she's probably
like in her thirties, but she just has no tolerance
for horror movies at all. Like she's the biggest chicken

(01:10:31):
I've ever seen. Okay, but she still does it for
the channel. And so like I watch reaction videos of
her watching the new It and just watching her lose
her fucking mind the entire time.

Speaker 5 (01:10:45):
Uh.

Speaker 4 (01:10:46):
It's so funny because she just like freaks the fuck out. Yeah,
all right, do you watch anything else? Time?

Speaker 7 (01:10:54):
No?

Speaker 4 (01:10:55):
I did not, and I watched two things. I only
really have to talk about one of them because one
of the things I rewatched was Superman over the Weekend
second time. Second time, I found a friend of mine
who's plaques I'm connected to. Uh. I had a Superman
up from a screening that looked like it was possibly

(01:11:16):
from Russia, and since I already paid to watch it,
I don't feel guilty. So I rewatched it, and you know,
I felt I feel like I liked it a little
bit more the second time. So maybe it was knowing
the things I had quibbles with we're already in the
movie helped me just sort of not worry about those.

Speaker 3 (01:11:35):
I feel like there was a lot of pressure on
that movie going into it, so I can see why
a second time watch would be yeah, yeah, just yeah.
You know, you're just watching a movie. You're not like,
oh shit, what have we got ourselves into?

Speaker 4 (01:11:50):
Yeah? So yeah, So it was fun to rewatch it
and you know, just kind of taken it again. I
don't I don't think it's going to be towards the
bottom of my Superman list, but you.

Speaker 5 (01:12:02):
Know, the bottom of the Superman list.

Speaker 4 (01:12:06):
Towards the bottom. It's no Man of Steel in or
any Snyder movie. But it's also not you know, Superman
or Superman two quality either.

Speaker 5 (01:12:17):
I mean, I don't know. Superman two is kind of
a hot mess in some.

Speaker 4 (01:12:21):
Ways it is, but if he replace it with the
Donner cut and then imagine in your head like, ah,
this was a much better story.

Speaker 3 (01:12:29):
Yeah. I don't know. I don't think there's been a
great Superman movie yet.

Speaker 4 (01:12:35):
Really, you don't think the first one was good?

Speaker 3 (01:12:37):
It's good, I said, great, I don't think it's been great.
I think the first one has a lot of issues.
I think Christopher Reeve really helps it out a lot.
He's yeah, he's so good at doing what he does
that it really changes the discussion about that movie. But
it's it's slow. They didn't have the technology to give

(01:13:00):
him the powers that they wanted him to have. I guess, so.

Speaker 5 (01:13:07):
Mean like well building powers with his vision, Yes.

Speaker 3 (01:13:12):
I do mean like that.

Speaker 4 (01:13:16):
Yeah, But I mean it's no Superman for the question
peace either.

Speaker 3 (01:13:20):
So I tried to rewatch that the other day. It's
just YouTube recommended it to me like its entirety, and
I watched it like I thought, like I'll just throw
it onto the background, and I'm like, no, I can't
do that.

Speaker 4 (01:13:34):
Did John Cryer show up and You're like, no, no, no.

Speaker 3 (01:13:37):
I don't even know if I made it too, I
can't remember, But it was like, because I think about
that movie is.

Speaker 4 (01:13:44):
One of the better He's one of the better things
in that movie, but that movie is just straight trash.

Speaker 5 (01:13:48):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:13:49):
I think the thing about that movie that it's one
of those ones where it's like I saw it when
it was new, when I was like very young and
just excited, like, oh, that guy's as strong as Superman,
you know what I mean, And then like just thinking
back to it, I can like in my head it
sucks or you know what I mean, Like I'm picturing
it going, oh, that sounds terrible when it's like why
would I have liked that?

Speaker 4 (01:14:09):
When I was a kid, I saw that in the theater,
it was like, oh, man, I hope they make another one.
They didn't, Well.

Speaker 3 (01:14:17):
I probably I probably saw that.

Speaker 5 (01:14:20):
It was a kid's movie made by Cannon. So you guys,
it needs to be graded on a curve.

Speaker 4 (01:14:28):
Yeah, yes, those kids movies about eliminating nuclear.

Speaker 5 (01:14:31):
War once again, a kid's movie made by Cannon.

Speaker 3 (01:14:39):
Well yeah, I mean it's it's the classic story of
a superhero sequel of like, hey, we've got a star
that wants to send a message. We've got you know,
a studio with a certain idea we've got, you know,
fighting over budgets, all the stuff that we've heard so
much about over the years.

Speaker 4 (01:14:57):
Splashed from thirteen million the seventeen million, like the day
they went into production.

Speaker 3 (01:15:03):
Yeah, I do feel bad for them trying to figure
out how to work under those circumstances.

Speaker 5 (01:15:09):
I mean, the the damage that it did to the
flying special effect. Oh my god, I mean alone, alone,
that did so much damage to that movie.

Speaker 3 (01:15:21):
Yeah, yeah, I mean also the story is terrible, and
it's really hard for me to go back and watch
those movies. And Lex Luthor has hair, and I'm just like,
I can't get my head around it. Don't have hair.

Speaker 4 (01:15:33):
It's a wig.

Speaker 5 (01:15:34):
Yeah, it's established as a wig.

Speaker 3 (01:15:37):
I know, buy it.

Speaker 4 (01:15:39):
Did you hear the story about how Lex Luthor almost
had a mustache in the first one?

Speaker 3 (01:15:45):
Yes, I ever heard that.

Speaker 4 (01:15:46):
Yeah, it still cracks me up.

Speaker 5 (01:15:50):
Well, at least then you know for sure ethel.

Speaker 3 (01:15:55):
I mean, that's not unfair. All right.

Speaker 4 (01:16:00):
So I watched that, and then so Cindy's daughter was over,
and so we did what we usually do, which is
watch some sort of animal attack movie. And I had
bought one called Something in the Water from twenty twenty
four shark movie. Okay, yeah, this movie not good.

Speaker 3 (01:16:21):
I think I watched trailers for it once excited not
to watch it.

Speaker 4 (01:16:26):
So it's a bunch of girls getting together for a
I mean, it's like the wedding is happening that weekend,
and they go out on a boat to celebrate this
Caribbean wedding and this one girl gets bitten by what
I'm assuming is a tiger shark because it's in waste

(01:16:47):
high water, and they're like, oh fuck. So they load
her back up on the boat and are zooming back
for home across you know, this giant, endless ocean, and
one of the girl who's driving just runs it right
across a coral reef tears up the bottom of the
boat and so they're basically stuck out in the middle

(01:17:08):
of nowhere as the boat is sinking, and then they
all have to swim while one of them is severely injured,
and of course a shark is stalking them. And we
got to the point multiple times during this movie where
I was like, how long has this movie been playing
and we still haven't seen a shark? And I kept
checking and it was forty five minutes, and then it

(01:17:31):
was like an hour, and I'm just like, what the fuck?
And then we never actually get to see a good
shot at the shark. They do like an overhead shot
of a very cgi looking shark circling them, and a
couple like quick shots of it like swimming at people,
getting ready to attack. So that's about it.

Speaker 5 (01:17:52):
So what you're telling me is that a film student
was told the reason why Jaws is good is because
they didn't show the shark much. And they were like, Oh,
if I just don't show the shark, I'm a genius.

Speaker 4 (01:18:07):
Maybe. And of course all the girls get whittled down
one by one until there's one survivor left. Yeah, this
movie was terrible. It was god awful, and we both
regretted watching it. We're like, well, that was a waste
of time that.

Speaker 3 (01:18:22):
You bought it, so you have it to watch anytime
you want.

Speaker 4 (01:18:24):
Yeah, but I think it was like two bucks. So
and I didn't learn because just today I bought another
one for two dollars.

Speaker 3 (01:18:36):
It's hard to learn that lesson, man.

Speaker 4 (01:18:38):
But this one, I think I can expect a little
bit more of what the movie is going into it
because this movie is called Sharkenstein.

Speaker 3 (01:18:47):
Oh I've heard of this twenty sixteen. Glad you're going
to take the hit and let me know whether I
should watch it or not.

Speaker 4 (01:18:55):
And the covers, Yeah, shark that has stitches all over
it like it's been reassembled. So and let me let
me read the description for you. And this will make
Noah want to watch it immediately.

Speaker 5 (01:19:05):
Because at first you had me at Sharkenstein.

Speaker 4 (01:19:08):
Because the first couple of words, sixty years after the
termination of a third Reich program designed a weaponized shirt,
a reanimated abomination terrorizes the water of a small Ursian town.
So yeah, it was two dollars on voodoo and I'm like, well,
that is two dollars well spent, so we'll see if

(01:19:30):
that's true or not. As a whopping twenty four percent
on rotten tomatoes. Here a mouse clicking, which I'm assuming
is Noah just being like, where can I watch.

Speaker 3 (01:19:41):
This one.

Speaker 5 (01:19:44):
Naty shirt? Not to his shirt, that Nazi shirt.

Speaker 1 (01:19:50):
Here's a brief glimpse of some of the truly fine
pictures we've scheduled in the near future.

Speaker 4 (01:19:55):
Noah, you were tasked with movies for this week. What
did you find?

Speaker 5 (01:20:00):
And that's right, I was tesked with faking movies, which
I did. I'm totally not just talking while I look
at this list in front of me. Cyborg three, the

(01:20:22):
Recycler in Moon forty four.

Speaker 4 (01:20:24):
Jesus Christ God, Cyborg three, the Recycler.

Speaker 5 (01:20:33):
The Recycler do the stuff. Noah, you guess love me.

Speaker 4 (01:20:39):
As I imagine with the name Cyborg three colon the Recycler,
I'm not expecting good things for this movie.

Speaker 5 (01:20:47):
Listen. Would it help if I told you that Malcolm
McDowell is in this movie for ninety seven seconds? No, No,
that's not a big red flag. It's not a big
red flag. Every time that Malcolm dwell in a movie
for ten seconds.

Speaker 3 (01:21:02):
Any movie that they shot on location, at least.

Speaker 4 (01:21:06):
Any movie that is that is Malcolm mcdowald movie made
after nineteen ninety five, I do not trust the quality.

Speaker 5 (01:21:13):
Of That's probably correct.

Speaker 4 (01:21:19):
As Dog pointed out, his philosophy is have I ever
been there before? No, then I'll do it.

Speaker 6 (01:21:27):
God.

Speaker 5 (01:21:29):
He was saying he was such an amazing actor, and
then like he just did it. He was like, Nah,
I think I did it.

Speaker 4 (01:21:36):
I think I'm good.

Speaker 5 (01:21:37):
I'm good.

Speaker 4 (01:21:38):
I don't think.

Speaker 5 (01:21:39):
I don't think I have any more responsibility to make
good movies from now on.

Speaker 4 (01:21:44):
Oh, this one's from nineteen ninety four, so this would
have been the start.

Speaker 3 (01:21:47):
Oh, that's you're saying that you might have to readjust
your thing because it was nine you said, no.

Speaker 4 (01:21:53):
No, no, no, I was just making up a random timeframe.

Speaker 3 (01:21:57):
Uh.

Speaker 4 (01:21:58):
From the description, it looks like the main character from
the last movie and the Angelina Jolie car Rick or
is in this movie. Not Angelina and Joli also correct.
But the good news is Zach Gallagan from Gremlins, because
he never made a bad movie after Gremlins.

Speaker 3 (01:22:16):
Right, I don't know we've ever seen any.

Speaker 4 (01:22:21):
Ooh, William kat the greatest American hero, is also in this.

Speaker 1 (01:22:25):
Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:22:25):
See, I'm not leading you into the darkness.

Speaker 4 (01:22:29):
Shut your mouth. Although I may have to take it
back because I guess Kato Kalin's in this. So that
is a sign of quality.

Speaker 5 (01:22:43):
You said that, like it's not true.

Speaker 4 (01:22:47):
Yeah, this would have been right after all the oj
stuff too.

Speaker 5 (01:22:50):
Yes it was.

Speaker 4 (01:22:52):
So this is when he's like, all right, let's open
those pockets up so I can get some money, and
he ended up with Cyborg three the recycler. Oh my god,
I'm probably gonna kill myself. Next week live on the podcast, listen.

Speaker 5 (01:23:08):
I can tell you that there is a high budget
modern sci fi movie that essentially just steals the plot
of this movie, which is pretty wild.

Speaker 4 (01:23:21):
Do you want to talk about something less depressing than
what we're watching next week?

Speaker 3 (01:23:25):
Yes, it should be hard to come up the subject.

Speaker 4 (01:23:30):
Theo from The Cosby Show drown the other day and
then Ozzy Osbourne died today. Yeah, that's less depressing.

Speaker 5 (01:23:39):
It's suppressing. You've made it worse.

Speaker 3 (01:23:41):
No, I actually know he's made it better. I think
I think Ozzie dying so soon after his farewell performance,
there's something that feels right about that to me. I'm
sad that he had to go, but I don't think
Ozzie was the kind of guy who wanted to live
like ten more years and not be in the spotlight

(01:24:02):
and not you know what I mean.

Speaker 4 (01:24:03):
He said he had a suicide pact with Sharon, so
I was very, uh suspicious when I heard he died today.
I'm like, oh, really, is anybody checked on Sharon Osborne? Perhaps?

Speaker 3 (01:24:14):
I mean, I wouldn't even hold it against him.

Speaker 4 (01:24:17):
No, No, because apparently I didn't realize it had been
so long. But yeah, he was diagnosed with Parkinson's back
in twenty twenty.

Speaker 3 (01:24:25):
Yeah, I saw a really sad interview with him where
he's like, when COVID hit, he thought like, oh, like
this is great. I say, really good news because all
the concerts that were like I'll be healthy again to
redo the concerts that were canceling because of COVID, and
he went and had some kind of surgery and it
it didn't help. So it's like, oh that's a bummer. Yeah,

(01:24:48):
it sucks. It's it was. I don't know how much
of that final performance you guys watch, but it's like
he clearly just wants to be on stage in front
of people doing that, and it's like it was really
sad to see him like not be able to stand
up and still like it's weird because his voice was
going and stuff, but he still had all the tunes

(01:25:10):
down and stuff, like he still knew all the words,
you know what I mean. It wasn't like a sad
performance of like some like pathetic old man, that's just
we're just doing this because he used to be famous.
He was still giving a great performance even if even
with his physical limitations.

Speaker 4 (01:25:28):
M So.

Speaker 3 (01:25:31):
Sad, but not as sad as what I was going
to put us through next week, so it's all relative.

Speaker 5 (01:25:39):
How dare.

Speaker 4 (01:25:42):
Uh did Coldberg retire last time we recorded Olbert?

Speaker 3 (01:25:47):
I don't know. He was bitching because they cut off
his retirement speech because it was on actual TV and
it's like, yeah, on actual TV, there's time limitstickhead, how
long have you been in this industry? And then he
had what did he say? He said like, well, they
wouldn't do this like Austin or Taker, and it's like, yeah,
they wouldn't go fund yourself, You're not that much. He's

(01:26:09):
talking about, how are you comparing yourself to the Undertaker
right now?

Speaker 5 (01:26:13):
Also, the Undertaker would know how much time yet left.

Speaker 3 (01:26:16):
Yeah, he'd be a professional about it. It's just I
do I did enjoy the fact that like a bunch
of old wrestlers were like on being like just bad
noting him because he's such a fucking prick. Uh.

Speaker 4 (01:26:33):
I think we did talk about this last week, but
like not even five minutes after he got a speech
cut off, someone for sure reached out to Brett Hart
and was like what do you think?

Speaker 6 (01:26:43):
And he's like, eh, oh yeah, m that's yeah, it's
I don't know, I forget, Like somebody, what did somebody say,
like somebody edited a.

Speaker 3 (01:26:56):
Picture of him like doing like a greeter job at
like a store or something, and then I forget who
it was. It was like a wrestler whose name you'd recognize.
Was like, I don't know, can you even injure people
being a greader? It's yeah, I don't know. I didn't

(01:27:18):
like Goldberg as a character, and then when he started
doing shoot interviews, I realized I don't like him as
a person either, So I'm like, all right, he retired.
Who cares. It's annoying that WWE made it into like
a title match for him to retire, because I don't
know why they sacrificed the wronggoing storylines for that.

Speaker 4 (01:27:34):
But did you think you were gonna win and then
retires champion?

Speaker 3 (01:27:38):
Because yeah, I don't know, But I like, again, I
don't watch the product, so they're not doing it to
please me anyway. But it's like, I don't know. I
don't like the way they do retirements nowadays either, So
I don't like what Sina's doing either.

Speaker 5 (01:27:53):
So you mean aging rapidly and ungracefully all of a sudden.

Speaker 3 (01:28:01):
I mean the whole thing of like I'm gonna be
champion for my last year, and I'm going to announce
the retirement a year in advance, and it's like, how
do you? How do you do it? A year long
retirement storyline? It's like.

Speaker 4 (01:28:16):
A couple of things I've seen have actually been kind
of fun since he's been a heel the whole time,
because they do these like media sprums afterwards. Now, yeah,
which I think is kind of dumb for a fake show,
but whatever.

Speaker 3 (01:28:33):
How do you do they I don't even understand if
they're in character during them or not.

Speaker 4 (01:28:39):
Sometimes yeah, that makes it even worse. Yeah, but the
one was seeing it was kind of funny because he
came in and he's like, uh, all right, I guess
I'll take a couple of questions because they're telling me
I have to be here, and so then like you know,
reporters and quotes or whatever when they do have people

(01:29:01):
from like Sports Illustrated and shit there, so maybe I
shouldn't say that. But whoever he calls on somebody they
ask they asked some question and he just looks at
him and he's like, nah, I don't know that sounds
like a clickbaity type of thing. I'm not going to
answer that, and then moves on to the next person
and calls on them and they ask a question and
he's like, Eah, that seems like a clickbaity question. I'm

(01:29:23):
not going to answer that. And he just does that
the entire time, and I was kind of I was
kind of laughing the whole time.

Speaker 3 (01:29:30):
Yeah, I don't know, but yeah, it's probably better than
what Noah's gonna put us through next week.

Speaker 5 (01:29:37):
So listen, Sina. For all of the things he's not
good at, what he is good at is being funny,
Like I wish, I wish you would focus on that
more because all the comedies he's in are pretty good.

Speaker 3 (01:29:55):
Was that the whole point of this retirement thing is
that you can go do movies. I just kind of
assumed that.

Speaker 5 (01:30:01):
Well, sure, but I mean occasionally he tries to do
more serious stuff and that he needs to not do
because that's not that's not his place in this world.

Speaker 4 (01:30:12):
I mean, he even had a cameo in Superman, so
that's pretty funny.

Speaker 5 (01:30:17):
Yeah, listen, if they just actually do a fucking John
Cena Earnest movie, I'll laugh harder than I've left at
anything in my entire life. Just Son of Earnest, and
it's just seen as big ass and being young Earnest fun.

(01:30:39):
Don't put it on the list, please, I'm just going
on the list as soon as they.

Speaker 4 (01:30:45):
Make Yeah, when are we doing Earnest Month?

Speaker 5 (01:30:49):
I think I've already done almost all the Earnest movies.

Speaker 3 (01:30:51):
Yeah, we've done a bunch of them.

Speaker 4 (01:30:54):
When Ernest Saves Christmas, we've done. Do we do Earnest
Scared Stiff?

Speaker 5 (01:31:00):
Yes? Because we did Christmas in Halloween for Easter.

Speaker 4 (01:31:05):
And I think that's it. You realize there's like ten movies, right.

Speaker 5 (01:31:08):
I think we also did our It Goes to Kiss Me, and.

Speaker 3 (01:31:12):
We are not putting the direct video Ornest films on
the list. I will I will remove the list. I
will find a way to make it see you. Because
no longer of access to it goes fe the list
will become offline. It will be a paper list that
only I have access to.

Speaker 1 (01:31:29):
Please remember to replace the speaker on the post when
you leave the theater and our folks, it's time to
say good night. We sincerely appreciate your patronage and hope
we've succeeded in bringing you an enjoyable evening of entertainment.

Speaker 4 (01:31:51):
Please drive home carefully and come back again.

Speaker 5 (01:31:54):
Soon good Night,

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