White Water Summer & The River Wild

We go rafting with Kevin Bacon! First, he tries to teach us survival skills, but he seems to have a bad temper in WHITE WATER SUMMER. Then, he tricks us into helping out with a heist in THE RIVER WILD.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:00):
At a hearty welcome to our drive in theater. We
have a wonderful evening's entertainment lined up for you, one
that will provide several hours of pleasurable relaxation and diversion
for you and your family.

Speaker 2 (00:14):
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in on the following AM station.

Speaker 1 (00:37):
Drive away your worries and cares at this drive in theater.

Speaker 2 (00:42):
That's why.

Speaker 3 (00:43):
To familiarize you with the movie rating.

Speaker 2 (00:44):
Symbols which will be used by this theater, we present
the following guide for parents and young people.

Speaker 3 (00:50):
X No one under seventeen admitted that can be one
of our first movies for Slave September.

Speaker 4 (01:00):
Slave September.

Speaker 5 (01:03):
Yeah, there's no problematic issues of that. Good Lord.

Speaker 4 (01:12):
I feel like I should be more opposed to slave September,
but I don't know. There's a lot of good movies
they could fit into that month.

Speaker 5 (01:23):
A doom Asylum on the list. Oh my god, what
is it? Doom Asylum?

Speaker 4 (01:31):
I don't think that was me because that does not
sound familiar.

Speaker 3 (01:34):
That was me, I should I should tell you guys
that after after kind of pussing it out last week
and running away from the movies that I originally picked,
I felt really guilty. So I'm making a commitment to
myself to make sure things get a little weird around
here the next few times that I'm allowed to pick.

Speaker 5 (01:53):
So, Okay, Doom Asylum is not good.

Speaker 4 (01:57):
So what you're saying is it's time for a weird off.

Speaker 3 (02:01):
I'm saying I put a necrophilia week on the list.

Speaker 4 (02:04):
Jesus, what are the odds that May is in that lineup?

Speaker 3 (02:12):
Nope, No, nothing At the time, May, we can throw
May on the list too. That just won't be one
of my picks for what I want to be weird,
because it's an actual quality picture.

Speaker 4 (02:21):
I mean, as far as this is going to be
one of those statements that I regret saying out loud,
but as far as movies about somebody that wants to
fuck a corpse, it's probably the best movie about somebody
that wants to fuck a corpse.

Speaker 3 (02:38):
May is actually an early example of that pretentious art
house body horror that I've become a big fan of.

Speaker 5 (02:48):
So well, I added Slave Girls from Beyond Infinity to
the list, and I teamed it up with an indie
movie called Space Babes from Outer Space.

Speaker 4 (03:04):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (03:06):
Yeah, that should be a good week.

Speaker 4 (03:08):
I enjoy I enjoy this. It wins if for nothing
other than titles, that's true, have no notes, have no
notes on the titles.

Speaker 3 (03:19):
So then the official position is that only one of
the movies in September has to have a slave in it.

Speaker 5 (03:29):
I mean, I guess so. I think I've never actually
seen space space from out of Space, but it's made
by some people who make some pretty gnarly movies like
Found and fuck yeah, Harvest Lake. But this one is
they're like, oh, I'm gonna make like a goofy you know,
USA Up all night type of type. Oh, probably a

(03:54):
good turn, since those last three or four have just
been like kind of like rough, like good films, but
just rough movies.

Speaker 3 (04:03):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (04:04):
It's actually I was just having a conversation with somebody
about Found. Yeah yeah, well, because they were asking me.
They were like, I want to watch something that's about
a serial killer, and they were like, and you know,
all the weird like off the beaten track onens that
I was like, you should one. Watch Found It's about
an awkward little boy trying to deal with the fact

(04:24):
that his older brother is a serial killer. It's pretty great.

Speaker 3 (04:29):
I got to rewatch that. That might end up on
the list, or else I'll just watch it myself one
or the other.

Speaker 4 (04:33):
I still haven't read the book because you know it's
based off of a book of the same name.

Speaker 3 (04:40):
That all right, well, we'll discuss it in more detail
when we get around to covering another show.

Speaker 5 (04:47):
What other soul crushing movie can we team it up with?
Because man, wow.

Speaker 3 (04:53):
That movie.

Speaker 4 (04:54):
Do you really think it founds that soul crushing?

Speaker 5 (04:58):
We'll get into it.

Speaker 4 (04:59):
I mean, it's fucked it. It is fucked but it
genuinely is a movie about brothers that love each other,
even though it's fucked up.

Speaker 5 (05:09):
Sure, like Doug zeb we'll get into it. We do it.

Speaker 3 (05:12):
Yeah, there's the one about the mom who figures out
her son's a serial killer too. Maybe we can team
those up.

Speaker 5 (05:18):
Yeah, all right, it works. Everybody, have a good week.

Speaker 4 (05:24):
It's been Okay. I gotta get up at seven o'clock
in the morning and go to the airport and fly
to Florida.

Speaker 5 (05:29):
But what do you want?

Speaker 4 (05:30):
What are you going to Florida for just going to
visit my mom.

Speaker 5 (05:34):
You're off on another vacation.

Speaker 4 (05:35):
I was like, I like, I haven't gone to see her,
and you know things have been rough, and.

Speaker 5 (05:41):
Yeah, yeah, that's fair enough. What's a horror convention on
the weekend.

Speaker 3 (05:47):
That's good?

Speaker 5 (05:48):
Yeah? Uh. It illustrated both all the things I love
about horror conventions and all the things I hate about horns.

Speaker 3 (06:00):
All those other people there weren't there.

Speaker 4 (06:02):
All the things you're excited for and all the things
that make you go, I'm never going to another fucking convention.

Speaker 5 (06:10):
No, it's just stuff that is popular. Whereas I sat
there and watched because my friend Tony was running the
bloody disgusting booth, so I just sitting there, shittn't with him.
We're right next to all the terrifier people, so I
was just watching all the ridiculous lines and him talking

(06:30):
about I heard that each one of these terrifier people
make about one hundred grand a weekend doing the shit,
and I'm just like, what.

Speaker 4 (06:39):
There's no there's no way that that's true.

Speaker 5 (06:42):
I don't know, depends on how much their guarantee is
and how much they're making off photo ops.

Speaker 4 (06:48):
I mean, that's a lot of that is a lot
of merch this thing. If you told me that Robert
England made one hundred k over the weekend, I'd be like,
that's impressive, and that's Robert England. You would be like,
it's just what he heard. Don't get the terrifier thing.
Why are people so horny for Terrifier? I don't know,

(07:09):
is there's something like good about it that I don't like.

Speaker 5 (07:13):
We've talked about it, like I've seen the first one,
and the first one's fine, Yeah, clown chasing girls through
an abandoned apartment building and it's gory and whatever. And
then I tried to watch the second one and it's
two and a half goddamn hours to begin with, and
I got an hour in and nothing happened, and I
was like, this is bullshit, and I just shut it

(07:34):
off ever went back.

Speaker 3 (07:38):
So, yeah, I don't I'm I never saw the second
one because I saw that timeline how long it is,
and I'm just like, I can't do it, man, that's.

Speaker 5 (07:48):
Just and uh. And so, as we said, they were
talking about it, and I looked at the other direction
because we were on a corner, and I saw Joe
Dante's booth and absolutely nobody was going up, and that
seems completely ridiculous at a horror movie film fest of
all or horror movie convention.

Speaker 4 (08:08):
Well especially like I don't know, younger people don't care
about like the filmmakers, which it's very strange.

Speaker 5 (08:18):
I don't know. The guy that directed and wrote and
directed Terrifier was there and he seemed pretty busy all weekend.

Speaker 4 (08:24):
Yeah, I can't. I don't. Yeah, I'm not saying it's bad.
Maybe it's Maybe it's great like other people like it,
so I'm just wrong.

Speaker 5 (08:32):
I think it's good for the horror business in general,
just that there's some movie that people are walking to
theaters to see being released unrated, like that's good for everybody.
But I don't understand this at all. Franchise. I'm sure

(08:54):
they're all perfectly fine people, but I just sat there
looking at him like there's like ten of you here.
I fucking hate all of them.

Speaker 4 (09:01):
Rh I don't, like I said, I have no idea.
I don't get it. It's not I just don't remember.
I don't remember watching it like that's that's how unimpressive
it is.

Speaker 3 (09:14):
I think we're old and young people have different opinions
than old people. That's just my thoughts on it.

Speaker 4 (09:19):
Like, I don't know, it could be, it could be,
it could be. It could be one of those things too.
Where Like, and I know this is weird coming from me,
but some modern movies are made for audiences that don't
want to pay attention to movies yea, which is even
for me though, Like, and I have hard time faying

(09:41):
attention to stuff. I don't want that. Like, sure, grab
and hold my attention, but but you don't need to. Like,
every movie doesn't need to be rapid fire ship to
like work, just needs to be entertaining.

Speaker 5 (09:57):
Yeah. No, I've heard film. I heard fucking Kevin Smith
talk about it when he was meeting with people on
Netflix that the pretty much tell them, like, your movie
has to be watchable while you're looking at your phone,
so it can't be super complicated. Yeah, so they're they're
literally telling people to dumb movies down.

Speaker 4 (10:20):
And it's listen, our audience is show.

Speaker 3 (10:26):
It's more like they're just it's like everything else right, Like,
the marketing is trying to appeal to the largest audience,
and that means trying to appeal to people who don't
really want to watch movies, and it's frustrating.

Speaker 4 (10:37):
What it's strange? What is strange idea movies for people
who don't want to watch movies.

Speaker 3 (10:42):
I know, but.

Speaker 4 (10:44):
I know I'm not saying you're wrong.

Speaker 3 (10:46):
There are a lot of people who come home and
turn on Netflix every day and don't really want to
watch it, but they live alone and they just need
something onto the background. And that's what Netflix is appealing to.
They want to be that that noise should put on
in the background and so be it. I guess, yeah.

Speaker 4 (11:07):
I mean there's that random stuff too. There's the uh
like comic books have that too. There's a lot of
comic books that feel like, oh, this is a comic
book for people who do not like comic books, which
is why, Like, why make that because you think that
they're going to change their mind and suddenly like comic books.

Speaker 3 (11:30):
Dude, I'm a hockey fan. I've been watching the NHL
gear all their marketing towards Marcus full of non hockey
fans my whole life, just going what about us? What
about those of us who watch every week?

Speaker 5 (11:42):
You're already watching, they already got to you. Yeah, mormies.

Speaker 4 (11:47):
Anyways, stupid ormies.

Speaker 5 (11:51):
Maybe people should get out of their house go go
be one with nature. The best way to do that
would be the book, maybe a whitewater rafting trip or something.

Speaker 4 (12:06):
As long as Kevin Bacon's.

Speaker 3 (12:08):
Jesus fucking Christ kidding, I'm I'm actually booking a white
water rafting trip for next week. Little worried Kevin Bacon's gonna.

Speaker 5 (12:16):
Show up better fucking op, Kevin Bacon doesn't.

Speaker 4 (12:19):
Could you imagine just for one fucking second that you
get on your whitewater raft you look over and Kevin Bacon,
so it just goes hey guy, and you'd be so
excited for about thirty seconds and then go oh oh.

Speaker 5 (12:38):
Oh, no, oh no. So somehow there are two movies
with Kevin Bacon that evolve in some way, shape or
form whitewater rafting indoor canoeing, and he's a dick in
both of them. Yeah, uh no, Do you want to

(13:01):
tell us about Whitewater Summer?

Speaker 3 (13:03):
Uh?

Speaker 4 (13:03):
Yeah. Whitewater Summer is about a kid who doesn't like
the outdoors who wants to Apparently he thinks he's at
the age where he's going to get his dick wet,
which I judging by how old they portray him in
the show is inaccurate, but accurate for the ego he's hopeful.

Speaker 3 (13:25):
Yeah, but.

Speaker 4 (13:28):
So instead he gets sent on this trip and it's
one of those trips that is supposed to be learn
valuable life skills but is ostensibly the very upsetting and
not good idea of make you a man.

Speaker 3 (13:47):
Yeah that is.

Speaker 4 (13:49):
You know, we talk about the poorer treatment of women
in society and stuff. There's a lot of that toxic
stuff aimed it men too, which is not great. And yeah,
I mean and literally, that's the entire plot of this
movie is You've got Kevin Bacon's character, who's supposed to
be this.

Speaker 6 (14:07):
Hey, come on kids, I'm gonna make you the best
you guy, who's kind of an asshole and doesn't like
he at certain points, he's right, like you know, the
Sean Aston's character is being a little bitch.

Speaker 4 (14:21):
Like that's his character. His character is a little bitch.
We can all accept that, right, there's nothing wrong with
being a little bitch. It's an okay thing. You should
be allowed to do that, but.

Speaker 5 (14:32):
You should be responsible for stuff. Yeah, correct, correct, I
get your point, yeah.

Speaker 4 (14:37):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, And he keeps crossing the line where Okay,
he's not letting him be a little bitch, but then
he's like just putting him in danger, like legitimately not
taking care of this kid because he's like, well, I'm
gonna force you to be a man, you know, And
it's like yeah, but maybe not. I mean, you don't
get that.

Speaker 3 (14:56):
I think the film at she does a really good
job of starting out where you're like kind of on
the adult side, and then it as it progresses, it
just gets worse and worse. So there's like a moment
early on where the Shawn Aston character leaves some stuff
behind when they're hiking through the woods and he's like, well,
then we're all going to stay here and make dinner

(15:17):
and you're going to go back and get it, Like
that's your responsibility. You were supposed to be carrying that,
and and you know, the Shawn Aston character is like,
you can't make me do that, and it's like, yeah,
you can. That was your job. You're supposed to be
carrying those things. Go get them, right.

Speaker 5 (15:31):
That is a valid point.

Speaker 3 (15:33):
That's like, that's like that's good adulting right there. And
there's a moment when they're on an island fishing and
Shawn Aston character doesn't like doing the traditional fishing stuff,
so he develops like a trap to catch the fish,
and Kevin Bacon character throws all his fish back because
he caught them in the wrong way. It wasn't a

(15:54):
manly enough way to catch the fish, I guess using science.
And he's like, your punishment is going to clean all
the fish, and he's like, I have no interest in
cutting up fish, and he m.

Speaker 4 (16:04):
You just scienced this fish, you little motherfucker.

Speaker 3 (16:08):
Yes, it is. It is a real like turning point
in the movie where you're like, okay, Like up until here,
I've been like, all right, we can go along with
this adult stuff.

Speaker 4 (16:17):
No, I was gonna say, I think the turning points
earlier because I think it's it's a very good because
both things happen simultaneously. Whenever you were talking about the
bridge scene. Yeah, the fact that so Sean Aston's character
almost falls off the bridge loses his glasses, which weirdly
doesn't end up like being a thing.

Speaker 3 (16:38):
No, because there's flash forwards till like three years later
and he still doesn't have glasses. No cares, well, he
never needed those glasses. Those glasses were just for show.

Speaker 4 (16:46):
Yeah, exactly. So I think part of the thing is
maybe that they're saying that those were a crutch or something.
But he does almost fall. He's very scared, and he's
obviously not doing what he's supposed to do on the
bridge because you know, Kevin Baker's character shows everybody, you know,
if it starts the Teltonia, you need to push outward,
and you know John Assen's character keeps pulling it in

(17:08):
to stabilize himself. But that just shakes it worse. Well,
they get back, you know, he tells his lie. Then
Kevin Bacon throws out his you know, the the tent
things in which the big reveal is oh okay, so
he didn't just send this kid off in the dark alone.
He followed him, you know, to make sure he would
be all right. But if you stop and think about,

(17:32):
you know, that moment of outrage of sehn Ashen's character,
because you're first you're just thinking he's once again being
a little bitch, but he's like, no, he legit was
on that bridge, in danger, afraid, and fucking Kevin Bacon's
character left him there.

Speaker 3 (17:49):
Okay, I would counter that with those types of bridges
are not actually that unsafe.

Speaker 4 (17:55):
So when you're when you're hanging off of it by
one leg, it's pretty unsane.

Speaker 3 (17:58):
It's the way it's raid is. I don't know, Like
I looked at that bridge and I'm like, I don't
even I would not be like I'd beat the dick
that was out there, like swinging it while the other
guys were on it and stuff. So I'm just so
I'm like, yeah, like and then he's so I look
at it as we're sort of getting the story from
the shawt Asking character's perspective, and I felt like maybe

(18:20):
the danger was exaggerated. And that's my perspective on that,
is that like he wasn't really in danger of falling.
It was more he was just being scared, and that's
why the Kevin Bacon character let him go through that.
And then he also does him the decent thing of
like retrieving the tent poles that he left behind, bringing
them to the camp and giving them to the Shawn

(18:43):
Asking character, not in front of the other guys, Like
he kind of protects him a little bit, so.

Speaker 4 (18:48):
He doesn't he walks into ca but he tosses him
on the ground.

Speaker 3 (18:51):
But he doesn't call him out on the lying, he
doesn't tell the other guys that he was too scared
across the bridge.

Speaker 4 (18:59):
Yeah, yeah, I suppose it's like, I don't know.

Speaker 3 (19:02):
At that point, I just at that point I was
still on board with the characters when they get to
the island and he leaves them on the island like
a kid with no outdoor experience leaves them alone on
an island.

Speaker 4 (19:12):
While well it's fucking storming.

Speaker 3 (19:14):
Yeah, and Eve even like even when he like left
him there and went back to camp, I was still
kind of like, like, that's too rough for me. I
don't approve of this, but it is the eighties. And
then when it's when the weather gets bad and he
doesn't go get him, that's when I'm like, fuck this guy.

Speaker 4 (19:32):
Well, yeah, it's problematic. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, there's
a lot of it's I don't know. It's it's interesting.
I also dislike the fact that at the end of
the movie, Sean Assen's character does do the uh kind
of man up yeah solution to everything, which I'm slightly against.

(19:53):
I'd be okay with him being less of a bitch,
but doesn't it feel like it would have been better
if he was less of a bit, but then kind
of used all the smart stuff because he's clearly a
clever kid to resolve everything instead of manning it up.

Speaker 3 (20:08):
I think it's fairly obvious what happened here. It's fairly
obvious to me that the movie is meant to end
at that point. So eventually, Kevin Bacon's character falls breaks
his leg. The Shawn Aston character wrings something up to
save him and pull him out of the area, and
he sends the other guys ahead, and he stays there,
proves that he can build a fire now and stuff

(20:28):
to keep them warm, and he's going to look after
Kevin Bacon until help comes. And I'm ninety percent sure
that that movie's supposed to end there. And some studio
exect came along and was like, no, we need a
big action scene at the end, and so they tagged
on this thing where Seohn Aston takes Kevin Bacon in
the canoe and they go down through the rapids and stuff,

(20:49):
and it's like, over the top. It's not remotely close
to reasonable because trust me, that canoe is not making
it down those rapids, especially not with the first time canoe.
We're bind the canoe. It like the amount of water
that's coming into that canoe, there's zero percent chance that
it makes it that far because canoes don't self, like
there's no way for water to get out of.

Speaker 4 (21:09):
There, like it's well and in that kind of rough water,
especially the like in that type of rapid where you
do have to do some like grazing, you know what
I mean, you have to live bump some rocks and stuff.
Somebody with a broken leg in that canoe would even
if they were in shock, would be screaming.

Speaker 3 (21:29):
And unconsolutely absolutely yeah, that whole ending sequence. And you
can tell, like plot wise, they get down the rapids
and then they're still out in the middle of nowhere, stranded,
and then the help arrives right so it's not even
like he got him back to town or got him to
the ranger station or something like he could. Like that
whole sequence is pointless in the movie. There's no reason

(21:51):
for that to happen. It doesn't advance the plot, it
doesn't help the characters, it doesn't help the themes of
the movie. It's just putting a big action sequence at
the end of the movie. And I think that like
this director is he did a lot of like after
school special type work, and I think that he was
probably being told, like, Okay, you've got to put an
action movie ending on the end of this, and he's

(22:13):
used to doing like that's a very after school special
thing for the Shawn Asten character to save the guy
that's been tormenting him the whole movie and then to uh,
you know, just have an end in this calm, quiet
way rather than having a big climax. And the ending
does not work at all, like that, that whole sequence

(22:34):
of going down those rapids and that whole stuff is
just it doesn't make sense in any context, and it
doesn't even look that good, right, Like, well.

Speaker 5 (22:44):
Let's talk about this movie's got some issues, all right.
There's this weird tonal disparity between these weird there is
Buehler esque wrap around sequence.

Speaker 3 (23:00):
Is you mean the other studio note?

Speaker 5 (23:02):
Yeah, yeah, they filmed two years after they filmed the
majority of this.

Speaker 3 (23:06):
Movie, did they really?

Speaker 5 (23:08):
Yeah? Okay, which is why he looks a lot older,
all right.

Speaker 3 (23:11):
I was wondering if it was just the makeup and stuff.

Speaker 5 (23:14):
But nope. I tried looking up to see what sort
of the behind the scenes was like on this movie,
and there's like nothing, nothing on Wikipedia, there's nothing in IMDb.

Speaker 3 (23:28):
Given what you've just said, along with what I previously said,
I can almost be sure that there was a studio
executive who came along after the fact and decided to
take this after school special and turn it into a
theatrical movie.

Speaker 5 (23:44):
Ye I don't know it's but it's just yeah. These
they have these like opening and then like one middle
and then an ending thing where he's like breaking the
fourth wall talking to the camera as if he's narrating.

Speaker 3 (24:01):
Like it's a totally different character.

Speaker 5 (24:04):
Yes, being completely different. It doesn't even seem like the
same kid. He doesn't even dress the same way. And
it's so weird like the because the tone of the
actual like movie part is kind of dark, like it's
a pretty serious, just sort of dark take where Kevin

(24:25):
Bacon's character keeps getting like darker and darker throughout the
movie until he just is a complete and utter asshole
by the end. To I mean, I think this was
almost supposed to be more of like a thriller because
there's the part where they're doing the rock climbing and
they have to swing out on a rope and Sean
Assen's character tells the other kid, I'm afraid that he's

(24:47):
gonna hurt me on purpose, And there's just this like
sort of dark overtone to it. And then yeah, these
weird rapparounds are all like light and supposed to be
sort of funny, and it just makes zero sense whatsoever.

Speaker 3 (25:03):
Yeah, I think what happened is that they made a
movie that turned out way darker than what they were expecting,
you know what I mean, And they're tried to lighten
it up, but I mean, you can't lighten up the
tone of a movie where a kid is dangling from
his like harness well because he fell while rock climbing,
and the guy leaves him there and just moves on

(25:25):
with the trip and then the kid has to like
figure out his own way across. It's like, that's that's
a really dark moment, Like that's a really scary thing
to do to a kid, and you know it's I mean,
the whole situation's absurd because of the kids who are
on their first camping trip would never be doing any
of the stuff they're doing in this movie. But also

(25:46):
it's like when you get to that point, it's like
that's a really dark moment to leave the kid there,
and the other kids are reacting to it appropriately, like
they're all turning on Kevin Bacon being like what the fuck,
like you can't do this to this guy, you know,
I mean yeah, and when then you're right, Like to
have that intercut with an action movie ending and these

(26:08):
lighthearted intervals, it really hurts the movie because I think
the dark elements of it kind of do work right, yeah,
mostly because of the performances from like fourteen year old
Sean Aston then Kevin Bacon, Like they're both good actors,
and I think like Kevin Bacon kind of does portray
it in a way of like he believes that abusing

(26:32):
these children will make them into better people kind of thing, which.

Speaker 5 (26:35):
Is you know, yeah, because you're on his side for
some of it, and then it just keeps getting progressively
and progressively worse. But they never have him actually like
turn evil for lack of a better word, like he
just you honestly believe that he thinks this is the

(26:56):
correct thing to do, even though a sane person would
be like, well, yeah, we shouldn't leave a kid dangling
over over you know, a gorge in a mountain on
his own, because he won't because he's not able to
like pull himself over to one side. Well, so even

(27:17):
though he's doing wrong things, I still get the impression
that he thinks what he's doing is correct. We we're like,
you're insane.

Speaker 3 (27:27):
What's interesting about this, though, is like we're saying you're insane,
but there is a whole like scared, straight, troubled team
boot camp industry that exists out there. Yeah that from
what I've read, this isn't crazy based on that, you
know what I mean?

Speaker 5 (27:42):
These are people bring those up because those like a people.

Speaker 3 (27:45):
Thing literally like kidnap children out of their houses and
the kid and the parents have signed off on it,
but the kids don't know what's happening. They dragged them
out to these places and they treat them like this,
and it is sort of a military style break them
down so that you can build them back up type thing,
but being done to little children who did not volunteer
for it, and it's scary shit.

Speaker 4 (28:05):
Well and it so it did not happen to me,
but I know people personally who got the treatment of
you need to learn how to swim, and somebody just
shoved them in water that was too deep. Sure, I mean,
which is so people just don't get it, Like I understand,
if you do that one hundred and fifty times, nothing's

(28:28):
gonna happen. But it only takes one panic breath to
fill your lungs up of water and you die.

Speaker 3 (28:35):
Like it's really weird too. And it's this especially because
this movie's from eighty seven, when, like parenting was very
different back then, you know what I mean, Like you
could understand the concept of parents from that time period,
just saying my kid's not tough enough, I'm going to
send him into the woods with this stranger after one meeting.
That's that's it. Like, you know, I don't think that

(28:58):
kind of shit is as common today. I think the
attitude is quite different. You know, it's weird because like,
as people who grew up in the eighties, I'm sure
you guys have had this before where you're like, you're
telling a funny story from your childhood, and then as
after you tell it, you realize it's not a funny story.
Actually it's a horrible thing that happened to you, you
know what I mean, Like, I'm sure this has happened
to all of us. I've been processing some of this

(29:20):
shit personally, like as of late, and I'm like, oh,
like the wonder I got all those weird looks.

Speaker 5 (29:25):
You know.

Speaker 4 (29:26):
Well, one of those things where it's funny because it
worked out is the thing that people tend to leave
off the end of it, you know what I mean.

Speaker 3 (29:36):
Well, and yeah, the definition of worked out is you
didn't die.

Speaker 4 (29:40):
So well, correct, I mean that's the whole thing. Like
it was this crazy situation and none of us died.
Ha ha ha ha ha. But if somebody had died,
it's a horror story and you're on dateline, you know.

Speaker 3 (29:53):
But yeah, it's like and it's I don't know. The
whole thing is because I like, I did relate to
this movie. I think the wilderness is beautiful. I thought, like,
like those stupid helmets that they make the kids wear
when they're doing these terribly dangerous things that clearly won't help,
Like I have to wear those three four times this
summer because I have a kid who likes to go
do stuff like this. You know, you know it's You're like,

(30:15):
I don't know why we're putting a plastic helmet on
while we zipline a thousand feet above the ground. That
doesn't seem like it'll help if something goes wrong. But
you know, so it all looks good, like the equipment
is right. You know, a lot of the interactions between
the kids, like I thought they did a really good
job of like all the kids are kind of picking
on each other at the beginning and teaming off, but

(30:37):
then as Kevin Bacon's character gets worse, the kids all
kind of group together and eventually they become a team,
and they start listening to the nerdy kid because you know,
he does know what the fuck he's talking about some
of the time, even if he's not good at the
manly stuff, and you know, they all that really works.
It's just then, like all the tonal issues that Brian

(30:57):
brought up kind of pull you out of it a lot.

Speaker 4 (31:00):
Mind, Yeah, I do so. Even though this movie is
not by any means perfect, I did find it odd
that I started watching this and I was like, I've
never seen this movie before, And I was like, I
can't remember ever hearing the name of this movie or
a reference to it. And I was like Sean Aston

(31:22):
and Kevin Bacon in a summer camping movie, Like, what
the fuck? How is this not? Like even at the
quality that it's at, how the fuck is this not
a more watched.

Speaker 3 (31:32):
Movie because it came out in nineteen eighty seven, and
everything came out in nineteen eighty seven. There's so many
good movies from that year, and it's just a lot
of buried.

Speaker 5 (31:42):
I saw this on TV once, and I think I
missed like the beginning of it, so I didn't know
like a whole lot about like the setup or anything.

Speaker 3 (31:51):
But that would get confusing because you'd be like, why
are these guys in the woods, and yeah, like it's
that one of their dad's kind of thing.

Speaker 5 (31:57):
Like yeah, I assumed it was just like a council
type of thing or whatever.

Speaker 4 (32:03):
But yeah, yeah, I don't know. It's fascinating. I'm really
I love the Kevin Bacon character.

Speaker 5 (32:10):
Oh, Kevin Bacon's great in it. Like, I don't think
there's even like some of the other kids who don't
really even like one of them is just there, We're
gonna house magazine in the entire time. Uh, Like, I
don't think there's a bad performance in the entire movie.
I think they're all good. They all do kind of
what they're supposed to. Like yeah, like Doug pointed out,

(32:33):
they all sort of even the other semi nerdy kid
eventually just starts like making fun of Sean Assen's character,
telling him you stupid at one point, and they all
just sort of team up on them. But like everybody's
performance is I think really good.

Speaker 4 (32:50):
Well, there is an interesting development in that relationship where like,
like I said, there's there's the whole you're you're being
a little bitch kind of aspect the Asden's character, and
I think that's what's happening with the other kid or
the other kids supporting him and being like, hey, maybe
you know, don't be so rough on him. It's not
that big of a dealer or whatever. And then Sean
Aston is kind of a bitch for a bunch of it,

(33:12):
and then he kind of starts being like, okay, maybe
he's a little.

Speaker 3 (33:15):
Bit Well, yeah, there's that the kid that the one
kid is kind of caught in the middle because the
two older kids, the like younger version of Billy Joel
and his buddy, they're kind of like like kind of
pullys right off the bat, but the kind of the
middle ground kid, he's like he's trying to keep the peace,
but he's kind of like, yeah, you guys need to

(33:36):
stop picking on him, and you need to be a
little bit less of a bitch because that's why you're
getting picked on, you know what I mean, right, And
it's there's a lot of that where you're like, it
felt real. It felt like kids, if that makes sense, Yeah,
because you're like kids do, like if you're if you're
around kids, like kids will be like a friend will
start picking on his own friend because he's trying to

(33:57):
fit him with the rest of the crowd. It's like,
I don't help pick on this. I'm going to be
the one getting picked on.

Speaker 5 (34:01):
So yeah, I definitely had some flashbacks, Yeah, watching that
that whole interaction, I definitely had friends that would jump
to the other side. I'd be like, what the fuck, dude.

Speaker 3 (34:13):
Yeah, and it's you know, I don't know. Again, they're
kids that you can kind of forgive their behavior. So
then at the end when they all team up, you're like,
look at them all working together. Good for you guys.
Like I'm kind of on board with that particular element
of the storytelling where I'm like, I want these kids
to become friends. And at the end when they do,
and when the Sean asking character is like, Okay, you

(34:34):
guys go do this, and I'm going to stay here
and take care of Kevin Bacon and they all listen
to him because he's kind of earned their respect. I
thought that that worked, right, That's what you want in
a story like this, is for him to earn the
respect of his peers, and he does like that. I'm
on board with all that stuff. It's just then like
then that kind of gets killed by that action movie ending.

Speaker 5 (34:55):
Yeah, and then the credits start to roll, and then
you have the rec scratch moment and him from the
future goes, wait, wait, wait, you think that's it? Yeah,
it's just like what.

Speaker 3 (35:07):
Yeah, I could not figure out those Like, like, knowing
those were added years later makes a lot of sense
to me, where you're like, yeah, that's just an executive
who you know, they filmed some stuff and then he
saw Aris Bueller was like, damn it, we forgot to
rip that off.

Speaker 4 (35:24):
Oh so that actually was filmed way later.

Speaker 5 (35:28):
Yeah, they filmed the movie in nineteen eighty five. Those
wrap around stuff was filmed in nineteen eighty seven.

Speaker 4 (35:34):
Okay, see that. I was talking to Shart while I
was watching it. I don't think I realized that, and
I kept being like, how the fuck did they make
him look five years older? I don't get it.

Speaker 3 (35:44):
Like because it like, for people who haven't seen the movie,
he looks like the kid from Goonies in the most
of the movie, but then in those little wrap around things,
he looks like the guy from Encino Man. Like it's
a very different thing.

Speaker 1 (35:57):
Yeah.

Speaker 4 (35:57):
Yeah, it's very strange. And I was just thinking they
did that with makeup, and I was like, this is
fucking impressive for this era. I don't understand how he
did it.

Speaker 5 (36:08):
Uh yeah, yeah, That's why I was trying to like
look it up. I'm like, this has to be like
a studio note. Like they couldn't figure out what to
do with the movie. They kept like testing it or
something and getting negative feedback, so they decided to go
back and film this. But there is like zero about
sort of this movie being put together other than they

(36:29):
shot in the Sierra Nevada mountains in California, some mountain
range in Canada, and then some mountains in New Zealand.

Speaker 3 (36:39):
They traveled to three different locations to film this movie.

Speaker 5 (36:42):
Why apparently, why would you go.

Speaker 3 (36:45):
To three different mountains set on one mountain? Yeah, the
whole like the movie is supposed to be set on
one mountain, So that means that they went to three
different countries to film in different mountains and then went
out of their way to try to make all the
mountains look the same. It doesn't make any sense.

Speaker 5 (37:02):
It's so weird.

Speaker 3 (37:03):
Everything you see in this movie outdoors wise exists in Canada.
You could have just come here. It would have been fine.
I can show you like it's not.

Speaker 5 (37:12):
Yeah, but yeah, there's there's no like the production section
on Wikipedia is very short.

Speaker 3 (37:19):
Yeah. Yeah, I am going to stand by my theory
that this was made for TV and then somebody decided
to up it to to a theatrical release and that's
what happened.

Speaker 5 (37:29):
Yeah, the Sierra Nevada Mountains in California, in western Quebec, Canada,
at the small French Quebec town of Fort Collage.

Speaker 3 (37:39):
So not even like they didn't just go from California
like straight north. They came all the way across the continent.

Speaker 5 (37:45):
Yep, and then New Zealand locales.

Speaker 3 (37:48):
That is what I mean. It does it again. It
looks fucking great, Like the mountains look cool, the river
looks nice. They really like. You can tell they filmed
it in woods and not on like some backlots somewhere,
and that's important. But I still wouldn't have gone to
three countries for this.

Speaker 5 (38:06):
Yeah, apparently they Columbia Pictures released the film theatrically in
the Pacific Northwest region of the United States. Whitter release
was planned but never carried out.

Speaker 3 (38:17):
Sure, why not?

Speaker 4 (38:18):
Yeah again, I don't this era. Kevin Bacon was already
a name, right.

Speaker 3 (38:25):
Yeah, for sure.

Speaker 4 (38:27):
So there's something like, yeah, there's something there's just something
fucking crazy about this movie release.

Speaker 3 (38:34):
It's very strange, Like everything in it is strange.

Speaker 5 (38:37):
Yeah, cause, like.

Speaker 4 (38:40):
Those two actors and a tiny marketing budget, this could
have been the worst fucking movie in the world and
probably made money.

Speaker 5 (38:48):
Yeah, let's see, Sean Assen. Let's just look at because
they filmed it in nineteen eighty five. So let's say
they filmed it and the plan was to put it
out in like nineteen eighty six or something, you know,
giving them like seven or eight months to edit this
thing together. Like what was his filmography at the time,
Jesus Crisis. Dude's been in one. Yeah, so he's in

(39:11):
the goonies in nineteen eighty five, he was in the
Goonies music video eighteen eighty five. Okay, he was in
a music video for kids for Kids in Africa in
nineteen Okay, he was an episode of the Magical World
of Disney.

Speaker 3 (39:29):
So yeah, yeah, I'm standing by my theory until I
find out I'm wrong, because it sounds like maybe two maybe.
Then he got well known for Goodies after they had
filmed this, and that's why they wanted to then turn
around to make it into a bigger movie.

Speaker 4 (39:44):
But Goodies was released in eighty five, right, yeah, so
the year they filmed this is the height of his popularity.
Why yeah, but put it off.

Speaker 3 (39:54):
Because she had to wait, let him wait two years.
They didn't have the makeup to make him look older
for the wrap around shots.

Speaker 4 (39:59):
I guess I would have. Here's the thing, I would
have so much fucking extra, pointless respect for this movie
if I was told that's what they did. They were like,
we want him to look older, so we're going to
wait two years.

Speaker 3 (40:13):
If that, If that was true, I'd be so impressed
with these filmmakers.

Speaker 4 (40:16):
I don't think that it's true, right, I'd be like
the fucking the craft, the dedication.

Speaker 3 (40:22):
But if they if they did film it, with the
intention of releasing it to television. Realize like, holy shit,
this kid we signed six months ago was just in
the Goonies and look at what it just did in theaters.
It could have taken them a while to figure out
a plan for how to turn it into the theatrical film.
It's the only thing that makes sense to me. I
cannot get my head around it.

Speaker 5 (40:43):
Yeah. And then for Kevin Bacon, it makes even less
sense because nineteen eighty four, Footloose comes out, and then
he did like some TV movie, and then his next
quote unquote big movie would have been the one, the
Quicksilver one where he is like a delivery driver on
a ten speed. Yeah, and then Whitewater Summer. So it

(41:04):
seems like they would have been like, oh, we got
the guy from Footloose and the kid from the Goonies.

Speaker 4 (41:09):
Let's what It's strange. Kevin Bacon's career was strange because
like Footloose, Jesus Christ, like instant uber celebrity, and then
to make like a few movies that are just like
forgettable turts, you know what I mean.

Speaker 3 (41:26):
But I mean, contracts are also signed in advance.

Speaker 4 (41:29):
Right, sure, well, but usually you know, they they attempt
to capitalize at least, you know, they'd be like, oh, fuck,
you know, we at the jackpot with this guy. Let's
throw some shit and make a good movie.

Speaker 5 (41:43):
Nineteen eighty three, Kevin Bacon was in a made for
TV movie called The Demon Murder Case.

Speaker 4 (41:50):
The Demon Murder.

Speaker 5 (41:52):
Case, the young boy is taken over by demons who
forced him to commit murder.

Speaker 4 (41:59):
Christ Kevin Bacon, Yeo.

Speaker 5 (42:02):
Kevin Bacon, Joyce Van Patten, Chloris Leachman, Eddie Albert.

Speaker 4 (42:08):
Although I suppose Kevin Andy Ma, oh Jesus, I was
gonna say, I suppose Kevin Bacon has always maybe been
the same as he is now in his career, in
which he doesn't seem to be particularly picky about the
roles he thinks. It seems to be like, if you're
paying him, he's gonna.

Speaker 3 (42:27):
Do your movie.

Speaker 5 (42:28):
I don't know. There was a while where he refused
to talk about any of the horror movies he'd been
in and.

Speaker 4 (42:34):
Didn't want to do sequels, and sure, but he also
has been in a lot of fucking trash, like a lot.
Now that's gonna happen when you're in eight hundred thousand movies.
But like I said garbage. He's in garbage, and he's
in movies that are clearly garbage on paper.

Speaker 5 (42:56):
You know, years after this movie came out, he was
in Tremors.

Speaker 3 (43:01):
So now we're just now we're just reading IMDb to
the listeners. Let's move on.

Speaker 5 (43:05):
And then the same year he was in flat Liners.

Speaker 3 (43:07):
Stop It.

Speaker 4 (43:09):
Stop Its back, just clearly the better of the two.

Speaker 5 (43:13):
Oh yeah, yeah, of course. But yeah, well, I mean
I think it just re like, uh reinforces our confusion
on the weird tonal shifts of this movie and the hey,
let's hold onto this movie for two years because we
don't know what to fucking do the film. A wrap around, Hey,

(43:34):
Ferris beel is popular. You should talk directly to the
camera and be all sassy Beeler.

Speaker 3 (43:41):
Yeah, there was obviously some confusion on how to release
this film and how to do it.

Speaker 5 (43:47):
Like I feel like if you even if you just
go back and edit out the wrap around stuff stuff,
have him in the him narrating it in the future,
it already makes it a better movie because literally just
start to finish.

Speaker 4 (44:05):
I think the weird thing is is I don't I
don't know if I'm down with the removal of the
wrap around. I think the wrap around needed to be better,
but it's one of the few things in this movie
which again we can I'm going to call this a
summer camp movie. That's obviously not correct, but it kind
of is. It follows that formula. It's the only thing

(44:28):
that makes it unique other than the fact that the
actors are good.

Speaker 5 (44:32):
Yeah, but unique doesn't mean good either.

Speaker 3 (44:35):
Yeah, I don't. I don't.

Speaker 4 (44:36):
For me, it's like not unique almost certainly does mean shitty.

Speaker 3 (44:40):
I don't know. I think this movie is unique in
the fact that it's a thriller about kids going into
the woods with a counselor. The fact that the counselor
turns evil was pretty uncommon at the time, you know
what I mean. Even in movies that had evil counselors,
they weren't the villain of the film back then because
evil adults were just considered acceptable. I think it's uh.

(45:05):
I think you take away that wrap around stuff and
you fix it, helps fix the tonal issues and allows
you to become more engaged in the story, and I
think that would really help the film. I still think
the ending is problematic. The problem is if you take
off that action movie ending and you take off those
wrap arounds. Now your movie's an hour long, and if
you're not gonna have commercials, it's not long enough to air, right.

Speaker 4 (45:28):
Well, and and kind of land like that's the that's
the truth. This movie is like again, the performances are fine.

Speaker 3 (45:35):
It's it's a drama. It's a thriller film. It's not
you're it's not an action movie if you do that.

Speaker 4 (45:40):
Well, But the next the next movie is also like
a thriller drama and it's exciting.

Speaker 3 (45:46):
Yeah, but I mean not not all movies are meant
to be exciting, right, Like some movies are meant to
be to concentrate more on characters and things like that.

Speaker 4 (45:55):
Right, So sure, sure, I mean, as you could turn
this into a character that a piece. But it's a
little od for a camp movie.

Speaker 3 (46:03):
But it's not a camp movie. That's what I'm saying.
You've decided to call it that, but you've already acknowledged
you weren't you weren't correct when doing so, Like you
know what I mean. The problem I would think is
from a marketing perspective, this is kids movie.

Speaker 4 (46:16):
It's not a camp movie because there's no camp.

Speaker 3 (46:19):
But it's not a camp movie.

Speaker 4 (46:20):
But it is. But it is a camp movie. It is,
it is. It is about a young, awkward boy who
gets picked on by the other people out in the
woods while learning life skills and becoming a man. That
is literally every camp movie.

Speaker 3 (46:34):
Okay, but this is not a camp movie.

Speaker 5 (46:35):
They share it.

Speaker 3 (46:39):
This is never intended to be something that you laugh
at the kids in the woods or root for him
to become more manly. It's it's a thriller movie, isn't
that It's a drama thriller that happens to take place
in the woods.

Speaker 5 (46:53):
Mat Uh. Since we were talking about the next movie, Doug,
do you want to tell us about the river?

Speaker 3 (47:00):
The River Wild. There's a family and they're gonna take
a whitewater rafting trip down this river.

Speaker 5 (47:07):
It is this kid's birthday, which I feel like is
a pretty sucky birthday present.

Speaker 3 (47:11):
Oh, I disagree. I would have loved this when I
was a kid. I would love it.

Speaker 1 (47:17):
Now.

Speaker 3 (47:17):
I want to go on the trip that they go on.

Speaker 5 (47:21):
This all sounds miserable.

Speaker 3 (47:23):
Oh, this looks amazing to me. But I told you, like,
I'm literally booking a whitewater rafting trip for next week.
It's not quite as elaborate as the ones in this movie.

Speaker 5 (47:32):
But I assume you don't have a private jet that's
gonna fly.

Speaker 3 (47:36):
You there either. No, I'm gonna It's more like we're
gonna drive there, and then it's like a three hour
guided tour down a river, and then a bus takes
us back to where we start. But it's a little different.
But anyways, the point I was gonna u this movie
is they get there, they meet up with another group
of guys who originally seem very nice, but one of

(47:57):
them is Kevin Bacon, so we know they're not gonna
be nice.

Speaker 5 (47:59):
That Kevin Bacon invite you to go whitewater rafting say no.

Speaker 3 (48:05):
So eventually the two groups are kind of merged because
one guy goes missing, you know, wink to the audience,
Oh he just ran off. And now that now the
tw groups are merged. Through big reveal is that these
guys are robbers and that they are now going to
hold these people hostage and take them down force them
to help them get down the river to where their

(48:28):
getaway cars, even though that's past where you're supposed to
go because there's bad rappids at the end. But luckily
the Meryl Streep character who plays the mom she uh
has experienced. She's like one of the only people to
ever make it through those rapids, So I wonder if
that'll play out into the climax.

Speaker 4 (48:43):
So fucking we talked about the tropes in the first movie.
This movie it could be called tropes the movie. It's
pretty funny, Like every every single thing that happens in
this movie, I'm like, yeah, if you had like a
make them paint by numbers for this, so that's what

(49:04):
that's a number two.

Speaker 3 (49:07):
Yeah, I mean the concept that she coincidentally like went
down those rapids as a kid, and you know, and
then they keep having like they have the Benjamin Bratt
shows up as like just a cameo of like, oh,
she used to babysit him and now he's a park ranger.
So he shows up to remind them that they shouldn't
go down those and you're just like, Okay, we get it.

(49:27):
You've made it very clear those are very dangerous. But
she's the only one that knows how to get through them.
And now she's been kidnapped by Kevin Bacon who's going
to make her do it.

Speaker 4 (49:34):
We get the amount of there's also an impressive amount
of bullet counting in this movie. Yep, they count them.
They count them bullets a hundred times to to make sure.
Periodically they remind you how many bullets are in that gun.

Speaker 5 (49:48):
Yeah, we should put out one of the other guys
in the group as John c Riley. Yeah, so you're like, oh, man,
I can't wait for him to be like Boats and Nose.
But it's a much different a role for him.

Speaker 4 (50:00):
And uh, he's gonna say, do you guys, do you
guys remember that John c Riley like didn't start off
trying to just be a comedy guy. Like just it's
crazy to think about it. I was like, oh, yeah,
he just fucking was trying to be a guy.

Speaker 3 (50:17):
And he's he's actually like a really good actor too.
He's kind of a reverse Tom Hanks in the sense
that he was like doing really good acting. And then
they're like, oh, you can be funny. Now you're gonna
be in comedies the rest of your life, you know.

Speaker 4 (50:29):
And there's Nancy makes funny faces.

Speaker 5 (50:31):
And uh, I was just looking at the cast lists
on IMDb. I just now put together that the kid
from this is the kid from Jurassic Park.

Speaker 3 (50:40):
Oh, I didn't realize that either. Yes, it makes sense.
This is like one year after kind of thing.

Speaker 5 (50:48):
Uh so, what do we think of U? Evil? Kevin
Bacon Whitewater Rafting.

Speaker 4 (50:54):
I feel like he's he's less terrifying in the movie,
and the movie tries to pretend he is. He has
bad I mean, it's a good performance, and he is
a bad guy and he is evil and he is dangerous.
But the movie's like, yeah, this guy is an evil
mastermind and you're like, no, he's not. He said, like,

(51:15):
it's an evil robber guy. Just let him be evil
robber guy. That's fine. I don't know.

Speaker 3 (51:19):
I think though, if you were a mom and a
son and you like met this guy and he's charming
and nice and he gives your kid a Lollapalooza hat
so that everyone will remember it's nineteen ninety four, and
then you know, you later find out that he's the
one that robbed the big catial auction. That's where he
stole all his money is from a catalouction, And it's like,

(51:41):
you know, and like these are like these are people
who live in like a nice suburban lifestyle, and you know,
they like to shro out here for the weekend, but
like you know, they have to fly here to get
on to get on the river kind of thing. And
then all of a sudden they see him holding a gun,
Like that's terrifying to most people, you know what I mean.
It's I think I think they do a pretty good

(52:01):
job of portraying it as like he's kind and gentle
through the first part of the film, and then once
he realizes that that tactic isn't going to work anymore,
he's very intimidating to a normal group of people. He's
not over the top at all. He's not like an
action movie villain. He's again, this is more of a thriller,
slow paced. I think he does a good job of

(52:24):
just yeah, like I wouldn't want to fuck with this
guy knowing he has a gun.

Speaker 4 (52:30):
Sure, sure, once again, good performance. I'm not saying he
isn't scary. I'm saying that they're trying to make him
I don't know they the way they're framing him in
the movie is a different kind of villain.

Speaker 3 (52:44):
I just think that they're making him a realistic villain.
You know the fact that the fact that he's it's
the way people are in real life, he's not. We're
used to seeing movie villains who are all like way
over the top, but we don't watch him like like
we watch him yell at his part or a few times,
but he doesn't just like shoot one of his own
henchmen just to prove how evil he is. Kind of thing. So,

(53:07):
I mean they do. Speaking of tropes, they do the
thing where the John c Riley characters like, hey, you
said no one was gonna get hurt. Now a couple
of people are dead, and then Kevin Bacon characters like,
I don't care if people are dead. We need to
take the cow money and run off. Sure.

Speaker 4 (53:21):
Remember, And there's a funny thing too, because at some
point they say how much money it was?

Speaker 3 (53:26):
Maybe just so much?

Speaker 4 (53:27):
Yeah, insimply I'm like, that's that's not a lot of money.
That's not a lot of money for those times.

Speaker 3 (53:34):
Yeah, I forget the number, but I don't think it's
so much either, Like it's not a million dollars, it's
some smaller amount that fits in a green Duffel bag.

Speaker 4 (53:42):
Yeah, it's like, well, it's like I wanna say it's
three hundred thousand dollars.

Speaker 3 (53:46):
That it also presupposes that at this cataloction, people all
pay cash, which seems off to.

Speaker 4 (53:51):
Me, Like, well that that actually is a thing.

Speaker 3 (53:56):
Maybe.

Speaker 4 (53:57):
Well, I mean I'm from Hicksville. That's thing.

Speaker 3 (54:00):
They pay cash, like, I've no I never went to
a cadialauction until.

Speaker 5 (54:04):
After trust them in their banks all onto the mattress.

Speaker 4 (54:08):
Yeah, as a person whose job is to monitor cash transactions,
I can tell you that farmers fucking are horny for
cash and that they are dumb as fuck.

Speaker 5 (54:22):
I don't know why you would say that, but yeah,
I don't know. Uh, at a point I've completely Losso, Well.

Speaker 3 (54:34):
What are your generals on the movie? Brian? Did you
did you enjoy watching the movie?

Speaker 4 (54:38):
Uh?

Speaker 5 (54:38):
This his first time watched for me. The I would
say the biggest complaints I have about this movie is
that it's too long. It is almost it is almost
two hours exactly. Well, I feel like there's some stuff
we can shave off throughout the medal.

Speaker 4 (54:54):
Pace A long time to count the seven fifty seven.

Speaker 5 (55:02):
Sure, I feel like we can shave some of that
stuff off of the middle and not really lose much.
I do. I did enjoy the movie. I think everybody's
performance again is pretty good.

Speaker 4 (55:19):
Uh.

Speaker 5 (55:21):
Meryl hot take. Meryl Streep's pretty good in this movie
as an exasperated mother and life.

Speaker 3 (55:28):
Is it a little weird that she's in this movie though, Like,
what is she doing here?

Speaker 5 (55:32):
Well, this is before they kind of gave her the
prestige of being Meryl Streep.

Speaker 3 (55:36):
I guess, yeah, I don't, I don't.

Speaker 4 (55:39):
The weird thing is that the character she's doing in
this is not a character that I would think of
Meryl Streep as. But as as the character, I'm like, yeah, yeah, no.

Speaker 3 (55:51):
I mean, And it's it's why she's the famous actress
is because she can do different characters that you wouldn't
think of her as. Right, She's pretty convincing. Th Like,
I buy into it.

Speaker 4 (56:01):
Well, but even beyond the even beyond the acting, her
like look, does that make sense? She looks like a fucking.

Speaker 5 (56:09):
Tour guide, Like she doesn't look out of place in
the middle of the forest even though she's.

Speaker 3 (56:13):
Been Meryl Streep. Yeah. Well, and she does a good
job too of she plays like the city mom who's
like frustrated because her husband's working too much and stuff,
and then when she gets out to the country she
kind of gets back into like her old clothes from
back when she used to be a tour guide and stuff,
and she does that transition really well, which is hard
to do. Like she looks she looks correct in both environments,

(56:37):
you know, which is I mean, there's lots of people
like that, right, like people who grew up on a farm,
moved to the city for their job and can easily
transition back to the farm look. But that's very difficult
for an actor to pull off.

Speaker 4 (56:50):
I'll tell you what I feel like we missed out
in movies. Meryl Streep definitely should have played a fucking
scary ass serial killer in a movie, because in this
movie there's multiple times where she does that thing where
Kevin Bacon's character pushes and she she does that face drop,

(57:12):
you know what I mean, where her expression drops off
her face and she's like, I'm gonna fucking kill you,
and it is pretty scary. For the fact that she
looks like schoolmarm, You're like, oh, yeah, she's gonna fucking
kill that dude.

Speaker 3 (57:25):
Yeah, I actually agree with what you're saying, Like she
displays like a toughness and an anger, but she's that
she's like holding in and she just does it through
her facial expression and you're like, oh, ye, she's scarier.
She's not your suburban mom. She's scarier than that. Yeah,
that's important.

Speaker 5 (57:42):
She's got two big modes of sort of that in
this movie. Because there is the literal scene where the
her and Kevin Baker is sitting around the fire and
the kid is far enough away where he doesn't hear.
She just looks at him. She's like, I'm going to
fucking kill you. It just repeats it over and over again.
You can tell Kevin Bacon's character knows she's serious. Yeah.

(58:03):
But then there's the other mode where Kevin Bacon just
like yells at her about something and she just starts
laughing in his face because she knows that he's like
fucked and can't do anything without her, So like he's
not gonna do anything. Yeah, considering the big one of
the big plot points is he can't swim, and so like,

(58:27):
there's lots of times where she just looks at him,
starts laughing and she's like, what are you you're gonna
fucking do? It's because you got a gun, Like you
can't swim down this.

Speaker 4 (58:38):
What does it feel to you?

Speaker 5 (58:39):
Guys?

Speaker 4 (58:39):
Like there was some kind of a writing error and
that that plot point is very strange.

Speaker 3 (58:45):
No swimming. I think the idea is to make it
so that to make it so that he is completely
dependent on her.

Speaker 4 (58:54):
Well, sure, but I thought, didn't you think the reveal
would be at some point that they would flip the
raff and that he can swim, and there was just
a lie. They just baited them at the beginning of
the movie trying to drown the husband.

Speaker 3 (59:07):
No, I think it was. No. I think he I
think the whole time was the idea was that they
would eventually flip it. Because he can't swim, that would
be their way of attacking him, and they eventually try that,
but the water is not deep enough.

Speaker 5 (59:22):
I feel like it is because there's multiple shots of
him falling in the water, but it's kind of like
a life jack around.

Speaker 3 (59:30):
But I also think at the beginning he wasn't there.
He's not supposed to be trying to drown the husband.
I think if you watch his behavior in that scene
where he falls in and the husband's trying to save them,
I think what he's doing is he's imitating all this
stuff they tell you if you take swimming lessons, they
tell you this is what a drowning person will do.
And that's why you have to come up behind them
and stuff. Yet, because they act like they're trying to

(59:52):
climb a ladder and all that kind of shit, like
all that stuff that I've thought before he's doing.

Speaker 4 (59:56):
You don't you don't punch them in the face. You're
supposed to kick them in the ball.

Speaker 3 (01:00:00):
Yeah, it's husband. Shouldn't have punch him in the face.
That that is a failure of the movie. Because first
of all, you ever thrown a punch underwater, It's not
really that simple.

Speaker 4 (01:00:10):
So that's why you kick him in the balls.

Speaker 3 (01:00:12):
You're supposed to. You're supposed to go around behind him
and put your arm around the neck kind of like
in a chin lock, so that you can pull them back.
Well you swim to back to shore wells.

Speaker 4 (01:00:20):
That's for dragging now if somebody so that's that's what
I was taught because I took one of those courses
back in the day, because they used to be like
a lifeguard And if if somebody does that thing where
they grab you from the front and they're like trying
to pin your arms and stuff, you know, because they're
doing the crazy cat trying to get out of the
pool thing. You you knee him in the balls just

(01:00:41):
as absolutely fucking hard as you can, because most people
will freeze up or go limp if you do that,
and then you can potentially save them.

Speaker 3 (01:00:51):
I think that perhaps this is one of those moments
that we were talking about with the last movie, where
you're going to realize after you've said that something was
going on wrong there. They weren't supposed to be teaching
you that.

Speaker 4 (01:01:05):
As far as I understand, that's still an accurate thing.
It's just the idea is to.

Speaker 3 (01:01:12):
I always might come up behind them so that they
won't be able to grab you.

Speaker 4 (01:01:17):
Yeah, you should. We were taught that too. I'm saying
that this thing was you were being taught. If someone
gets a hold of you and to won't let go
of you, you kick them in the balls to get
them to let go of you.

Speaker 3 (01:01:29):
I would also definitely not try to kick some one
of the balls underwater. I don't think that's going to
be that's going to go well. You'd have to do
a grab and squeeze type situation in order to have
anything anything work on that far underwater. So they bring
it in me up. It's not that hard. All rights
matter well, but I do think that it leads to

(01:01:55):
one of my criticisms of the film, which I think
the husband character, Like the beginning, they portray him like
he's like he doesn't want to be outdoors, like he's
he's got Brian's attitude of this whole thing looks terrible
to me, but Okay, fine, I'll go because it's my
kid's birthday kind of thing. And then as soon as
he's out there, like day one, he's like diving in

(01:02:18):
the water to save Kevin Bacon. Eventually when the action starts,
he's climbing the cliff sides and jumping off and swimming
across the river and everything, and you're like, this is
a guy who clearly knows what he's doing, Like I
didn't understand that character.

Speaker 4 (01:02:33):
I think. I think that whole thing is supposed to
illustrate the fact that Merril Stropp's character is misreading what
he's doing, because she keeps she does say multiple times
that oh, you don't want to be here, you don't care,
blah blah blah blah blah. But earlier in the movie,
if you pay attention, she she's taking him down rivers
like multiple times. That's happened. She was a guide when

(01:02:55):
they met.

Speaker 3 (01:02:56):
Well, yeah, there is I guess the family tension of
like he feels like I have to stay here and
do this work and or provide for my family, and
they're like, I can't believe you want to skip this
and work, and he's like, I don't want to work.
Maybe like the idea, maybe the film is like not
great at portraying it, but the idea of like I
wish I could come, but I have to do this
because you guys like living in a big house kind
of thing, which is real family drama that comes up

(01:03:19):
every day in real families. But the execution maybe just
isn't quite there because I got the impression he didn't
want to go and then last minute kind of got
guilt tripped into going, and then as soon as he
gets there, he's clearly on board for everything. And when
like when shit hits the fan and like Kevin Bacon
shooting at him and he falls down those rocks into
the water and stuff, and you're like, like, it's not

(01:03:42):
your first time in the wilderness. If you're behaving that way,
you know what I mean. So I think maybe some
better dialogue would have worked if they'd like, I don't know,
maybe they grew up together near that river and moved
to town together and so like the whole time, we
know that he has done all this shit before.

Speaker 4 (01:03:58):
But yeah, yeah, not sure. I'm I'm assuming there was
a point behind it, because I I think it's all
just to throw you off. I think it's to convince
you that their marriage is worse than it is, which
is a really odd It's that's not that hard to
do the marriage.

Speaker 3 (01:04:16):
It's the trope, right, The trope is this family is
having issues and they're struggling, and then the Kevin Bacon
character comes along, and I think we're supposed to almost
think that Meryl Street might be into him, and then
she dog, Yeah, she kind of did. Like like when

(01:04:38):
you're when you're like standing on the shoreline showing a
guy how to fish and there's a shirtless guy all
muscular there and you're like grabbing onto his arms and
stuff and your husband's right there. That's that's inappropriate, Like it's.

Speaker 5 (01:04:55):
I did sort of enjoy the camaraderie is the right word.
But how the kid like instantly sort of connects with them. Yep,
And there's a really good there's a really good scene
where so the mom and the dad have come up
with this plan too well, you know, they need to

(01:05:18):
get they need to just get away from them. So
their plan is, well, when we all get in the boat,
so we'll just go downstream really quickly as far as
we can ahead of them, since they're not super experienced,
and then we'll just you know, we'll just leave them
behind and then you know, we're done. But the kid
like immediately just jumps into their boat and it's like, hey,

(01:05:40):
I'm gonna go with my friends all right. Byes, they're
just like pulling away from the shore, and I just
feel like the his the kid's performance of just like,
oh yeah, this is natural. And then I think Meryl
Streem's performance where she's trying to keep it together because
she can't outwardly just show how pissed off she was

(01:06:00):
that this entire plan has just been destroyed right in
front of her. I think her performance is great. And
then you know just that weird like Kevin Bacon has
this weird moment where he's just trying to bond with
this kid for no other reason, I think than just
earn the kids trust. Yeah, He's just like, hey, what

(01:06:22):
is he something cool? And then it's not the bag
with all the money and stah.

Speaker 3 (01:06:25):
Kids.

Speaker 4 (01:06:26):
The kids are easy to manipulate.

Speaker 3 (01:06:27):
Yeah, but do you guys think I think that Kevin
Bacon character in this film genuinely was hoping this whole
plan would go smooth, that the five of them would
just make it down the river together and go their
separate ways. And he kind of loses it when they
realize he's a creepy motherfucker, and then they start trying
to break from him, and he realized. That's when he realizes, like,

(01:06:50):
I need these people, like I can't. I can't risk
them taking off. But I think he's having fun with
the kid. I don't think he's like, yes, he's manipulating
the kid, trying to make them his friend or whatever.
But I think he's enjoying having the kid around.

Speaker 4 (01:07:02):
You know.

Speaker 3 (01:07:02):
He's like they're talking about music. He's when he shows
the kid the gun, I don't think he's trying to
scare the kid. He's like, this kid is going to
think it's neat that I have a gun, and it's like,
you know what I mean. I don't think but I
think he's I think the character is because you see
a big turn in him when they try to run off.
At the next stop after this, after the incidence you're

(01:07:23):
talking about, they stop for lunch and the family tries
to like run off, and he panics, and that's when
you see the big turn in him. That's when you
see him he has that moment with the dad where
he's like, look, I need her to get me down
the river. I need the kid because that's how I'm
going to control her, but I don't need you and
I don't need the dog. So he'll piss me off
or I'll kill the both of you kind of thing.

(01:07:44):
And it's until then, I don't think he had any
real intention of harming them. He's not above harming them,
but he wasn't planning to, if that makes sense.

Speaker 5 (01:07:53):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:07:54):
So it's it's interesting because he's he is the villain
of the piece, but I don't think he's starts out
wanting to hurt any of the characters that we get
to know. He's obviously already robbed, and we learn later
through dialogue that somebody is shot during the robbery, but
there's there's a difference between that and actually wanting to
hurt these people, like his plan is to get out

(01:08:15):
of there safely.

Speaker 5 (01:08:17):
But I also don't know if his plan is to
not show how fucking creepy he is, because you don't
just stand on a hill and watch somebody bathe in
the river. I just think, Ah, this won't be a
big deal.

Speaker 4 (01:08:31):
She won't care, so I think he might be convinced
that she wants the day.

Speaker 3 (01:08:37):
Yeah. Well, first of all, I don't know that he
was intending to be caught. I think the concept is
that he's hid.

Speaker 5 (01:08:45):
Seems like he's very far away.

Speaker 3 (01:08:47):
Well, keep in mind, this is from the director of
Sweet Kill, so you can't you can't blame the actor
for everything if things don't seem right.

Speaker 5 (01:08:56):
Uh, that's true, it's confidential.

Speaker 3 (01:09:00):
So well, and this is the halfway point, right, He's
come a long way, He's not quite there yet. What
I took from that scene was that he didn't intend
to be caught, realizes he caught and kind of walks away.
And it's like the idea of like the creepy weirdo
factor slipping through it, as if it's that weird to

(01:09:22):
want to watch maryl. Streep go go naked. But you know, well,
it's a little like, yeah, I mean, it's it's creepy
to spy on somebody who's swimming naked, obviously, but you're
all like.

Speaker 5 (01:09:35):
By the way, I like Confidential was his next movie
after this.

Speaker 3 (01:09:38):
So yeah, yeah, So I don't know. I I thought
that is interesting. I liked the dynamic between the characters
because I think I think Kevin Bacon likes that kid,
and I think there that's a big difference between somebody
who's just manipulating that kid.

Speaker 5 (01:09:56):
Curtis Hansen also directed in one episode, Greg the Bunny.

Speaker 3 (01:10:00):
I see, that's a really good show. That's probably his
best work.

Speaker 5 (01:10:03):
Actually did the Saviory directed eight Mile, so.

Speaker 3 (01:10:08):
It's definitely better. Greg the Bunny is definitely better than
eight Mile.

Speaker 4 (01:10:14):
You got to lose yourself in the moment.

Speaker 3 (01:10:17):
Stop it, stop it talking to that.

Speaker 5 (01:10:21):
Yeah, I mean I like Kevin Bacon. I just I
don't know. I don't he's crazy. I feel like he's
just crazy from the get go. And maybe it's because
I watched Whitewater Summer yesterday that I was like, well,
he's obviously bad news. Yeah, I don't. At some point

(01:10:43):
somebody does bring up this does seem like an awful
lot of work to steal three hundred thousand dollars.

Speaker 3 (01:10:49):
It does well, and somebody drops the line too of
like we're really close to the Canadian border. The authorities
will assume you just slipped across, and nobody goes like,
why didn't you just slip across? That seems like less
work than going down this river.

Speaker 5 (01:11:04):
But you know, so if you're trying to hide shit,
maybe don't give that kid two hundred dollars for his
birthday present.

Speaker 4 (01:11:12):
I do love John c Riley's character, the look on
his face, and he's like, dude, that's stolen money, like
it's got serial numbers and shit.

Speaker 3 (01:11:24):
Plus one hundred dollars off. It's his right.

Speaker 5 (01:11:26):
So Kevin Bacon said it was from both of them,
who yeah, but maybe maybe that's just not subtle. Like
I bet if you just would have give him a
hundred bucks, everything probably would have smoothed over.

Speaker 3 (01:11:41):
I still think giving a kid you barely know one
hundred dollars is a lot, right, twenty bucks would have
made sense to me, sure, But I again though, to me,
I look at it as that's all like him trying
to hide who he is. And the cracks are forming,
like they're starting to see through it, right.

Speaker 5 (01:12:00):
Yeah, but then like overcompensating and going two hundred dollars
instead of a rational.

Speaker 3 (01:12:04):
Yeah exactly, Like he's you know what I mean, He's
trying to be nice, but he's bad at it. But
because then because there is the moment too at the
end where and this is another criticism I have of
the movie, when he is in the water and Meryl
Streep has the gun and she points it at him
and he starts like begging for his life, and I'm

(01:12:24):
not sure if we're meant to believe that he's genuinely
scared or if he's trying to manipulate her like it.
I think there's it's questionable because he has kind of
gone back and forth between the nice guy character and
the like pure evil character a few times. So there
are there are issues definitely in the movie with that,
almost like the the character is too good of an actor,

(01:12:47):
if that makes sense, So when he switches personas, it's
too much of a change, and you're like, is he
like he's kind of going a little over the top
with the difference between the nice guy thing, and you're
not sure if that's intentional or not.

Speaker 5 (01:13:01):
By the way, I'm just not thinking of this. Do
we ever see what happened to John c Riley at
the end, like everybody kind of gets out of the
water after they shoot Kevin Bacon, he gets up out
of the water sort of walks off.

Speaker 4 (01:13:15):
But I don't I don't know if you see it.
I think it's pretty heavily implied that he's basically given
up and then he's gonna get arrested.

Speaker 3 (01:13:23):
Yeah, I think that's the idea I got from it
as well. But I don't know if we see anything
like that happen, because he at that point has basically
turned on Kevin Bacon. He's like, fuck this, I'm not
like killing these people.

Speaker 5 (01:13:33):
Yes, too, But he does also bring up at one
point that he says he can't go back to jail
whereause Kevin Bacon seems He's like, he seems like, okay
if he gets caught, but I just can't go back
to jail.

Speaker 3 (01:13:45):
I conceptually, I think what happens is he's going along
with Kevin Bacon this whole time, because he's like, I
don't have a choice. If I don't help him, then
I'm gonna end up back in jail. And at the
end of the movie, it's kind of like enough's fuck enough,
I'll take I'll take the consequences over this, We've gone
too far kind of thing. But again, is it a

(01:14:07):
flaw in the film that we don't know that we
should probably know that there should be a scene of
him like turning himself in or whatever.

Speaker 5 (01:14:13):
Well, I'll say a big flaw in this film, just
from my point of view, is there's two moments. One
where I said fuck you John c Riley because he
kicks the dog. Then two where I said fuck you
Kevin Bacon because he shoots at.

Speaker 3 (01:14:27):
The dog, he misses, the dog runs off. Still, my
favorite dog moment is when the dad and the dog
have teamed up and they're running along the shoreline trying
to catch up to the other guys, and the dad's like, okay, dog,
on the count of three, we're gonna jump in and
we're gonna swim across so that we can catch them
over there. And the dad jumps in and he turns
around and the dog just still standing there looking down

(01:14:49):
at him. He's like calling her and she's like, I
don't know, that's some big jumping.

Speaker 4 (01:14:54):
Well I do. I do love that they do a
good job of that he tonally does the same thing
he's been where he goes Maggie, gut Maggie, Maggie, come on,
where you add Maggie, Meggie, Maggie.

Speaker 5 (01:15:11):
Mhmm. Yeah. The dog never shows up either, like for like,
I thought, like Kevin Bacon's going to point the gun
or something, and then Maggie would show up, and.

Speaker 3 (01:15:20):
I was hoping the dog would save the day. I
don't know, like, I don't know if that fits the
tone of the film, but it's what I want to
have happened, Like runs up and bite him while he's
got the gun, said Meryl streeped to shoots him, which
I guess plot wise is what's supposed to happen.

Speaker 4 (01:15:33):
But I'm assuming you're gauging that off the amount of
bullets that was in the gun.

Speaker 3 (01:15:43):
I did. That moment was pretty cool where he's like,
he says something like, you know, if you shoot me,
you're going to spend the rest of your life wondering
did I really really have to shoot him? And then
she pulls the trigger and doesn't go off, and he's like, ah,
it's empty, and he comes running at her and then
she slides bullet in and shoots him, and she's like,
now I don't have to wonder. Now I know kind

(01:16:03):
of thing. I thought that was handled really well.

Speaker 4 (01:16:06):
Because again she did she is a murderer.

Speaker 3 (01:16:09):
Like, well, no self defense.

Speaker 4 (01:16:12):
I'm not one hundred percent convinced. I think that she
engineered self defense.

Speaker 3 (01:16:21):
No, because if he hadn't run at her in that moment,
she wouldn't have shot him. That was she tested him.
She's like, you know what happens if I don't what
happens if I don't shoot you? And he's like, then
I'll kill you. And he's like, finally kill you. Self
defense in movie.

Speaker 5 (01:16:37):
Held her family hostage for the past like three days.
I think I think self defense is very justifiable.

Speaker 3 (01:16:45):
It is.

Speaker 4 (01:16:46):
I'm not saying it isn't. I'm just saying.

Speaker 5 (01:16:48):
Literally said she manufactured it.

Speaker 4 (01:16:50):
Well, no, she she did manufacture that particular scenario in
order to justify shooting.

Speaker 5 (01:16:58):
See, I was thinking we were at when I when
we were watching. When I was watching it, I'm like,
you know, if they made this, if they did like
a remake of of this today, this would be like
a six episode series somewhere, like you know, there would
be parts where they everything still happens the same way
the dad. Uh every Kevin Bacon makes it seem like

(01:17:18):
he shot him, but he's off having adventures with the dog,
trying to set up traps and like, you know, they
would split up these storylines and then everything would come
back together. But part of me at the end, when
he's like doing this whole monologue of like you're not
a killer, and if you shoot me, you're gonna wonder
if you've had to this old time like nowadays, you'd

(01:17:40):
get halfway through that and she would just pull the
trigger and shoot him.

Speaker 3 (01:17:43):
Yeah, I even back then, I think the way they
did it was kind of bold in a movie full
of tropes. They didn't they gave her, they made her.
They didn't have her go full dark, which is kind
of the trophy ending. Yeah, this movie's so full of
tropes that they teach give the different characters sign language
just so the dad can leave messages by carving hands

(01:18:05):
into the like tree. It's like, you know what is that?
Like is it a tree branch that he carves like
the hand symbols into so they can read it.

Speaker 4 (01:18:13):
It's like, yeah, there there are a lot of I
don't know, I don't know if it's good writing or
bad writing, whenever you go out of your way in
the structure of a story to justify random things that
you need. Yeah, Like, they're like, at one point, we

(01:18:33):
need them to be able to communicate with each other
without drawing the attention or without being able for Kevin
Bacon's character to know so Grandpa's death.

Speaker 3 (01:18:44):
Yeah, you know. But then also they're like, well, we
have to justify that they're looking at drawings on trees
and not questioning why they're there. So we're going to
insert dialogue about young people going on vision quests and
drawing on the rocks.

Speaker 5 (01:19:00):
Giving smoke signals, so the dad can do that too,
to let them know he's still alive.

Speaker 2 (01:19:05):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (01:19:05):
I mean, it really is like a lot of like, well,
that doesn't make any sense, Well, then just add another
scene earlier in the movie, and then we'll make it
make sense that way.

Speaker 4 (01:19:14):
I definitely do hate I hate that particular conceit less
because it becomes like it is part of the plot
of the movie of him ending up on his own
and then needing to signal them and blah blah blah
blah blah.

Speaker 3 (01:19:29):
You know what I mean.

Speaker 4 (01:19:30):
Yeah, versus versus we need one scene of them doing
hand signals.

Speaker 5 (01:19:36):
So Grandpa's death.

Speaker 3 (01:19:38):
Yeah, it's the difference between whether they can make those
tropes work thematically or not, and the smoke signal stuff
does work better thematically. There's nothing, there's nothing in the
theme of this movie that surrounds being deaf, you know, right,
They needed to add in another moment where one of
the characters couldn't hear the rabbits coming the other characters

(01:20:00):
cut or something. I do.

Speaker 4 (01:20:05):
I do find it weird that there. I still don't
quite understand the moment of the Little Niagara where she's
planning on flipping the boat in this dangerous spot and
her and the kid get into the air pocket beneath
the boat and just try to kind of write it
out and hopefully they're okay. And then the husband's alive

(01:20:31):
and he knows they're going to do that, and he's
there to help and he signals them, and instead it becomes, oh,
he's alive. We should go further down the river to
the more dangerous part. And it's like, what, No, you
flipped You've got the guy there, You flip the boat, right,
Isn't that?

Speaker 5 (01:20:50):
I was confused with that part as well.

Speaker 3 (01:20:52):
It's a little bit weird. I think maybe if you
watch the movie really closely, there's a line of dialogue
of Kevin Bacon figuring out they're going to flip the
boat or something, because there is the thing where he
starts tying her to the boat so that she can't
flip it on purpose.

Speaker 5 (01:21:07):
I guess, yeah, there's.

Speaker 4 (01:21:09):
A lot of I don't know. I feel like, once again,
this isn't a badly constructed movie or anything. There are
just things in it that I'm like, what why?

Speaker 3 (01:21:18):
Yeah, I think it is kind of a film by committee,
is the impression I get from it. Like a lot
of people had their fingers in establishing this stuff, and
they brought in script doctors and you know. So I
think everything makes sense individually, but I think in the
overall context of the film, you start to lose it
a little bit.

Speaker 5 (01:21:40):
Yeah. Like I mentioned before, I think if you shave
about twenty minutes out of this, probably fix some of
that stuff, taking out just weird little things that make
us go. But why do they do that?

Speaker 3 (01:21:51):
If they're going to do this, Yeah, you could have
cut this film down a little bit. I probably would
have shortened the beginning the movie could have really opened
at the river, like you didn't need to have the
stuff back at the home.

Speaker 4 (01:22:05):
Well, sure you did, because you need to Grandpa to me.

Speaker 3 (01:22:07):
Dave, Grandpa's Grandpa's out the river.

Speaker 5 (01:22:13):
Apparently Meryl Streep did most around stunts in this movie. Yeah,
and Terry Fisher was an uncredited script doctor.

Speaker 3 (01:22:19):
On the movie. Correct, she is on most movies.

Speaker 4 (01:22:23):
So it would be there's this whole thing where it
would not be beyond me to hear that Meryl Streep
actually is just an avid like Whitewater.

Speaker 3 (01:22:36):
She's she's not. There's a story that she at one
point like they told her to do something and she's like,
I can't do that, and then they're like, just come on,
you can do it. And then she fell out of
the boat and they had jump in the saber and
she's like, maybe next time I say I can't do something,
we all just listen to what I'm saying.

Speaker 4 (01:22:55):
Yeah, maybe maybe don't make me do the thing.

Speaker 3 (01:22:58):
Yeah, but apparently they wanted to use more stunt doubles.
I was reading something that like Kevin Bacon said that, yeah,
you couldn't because of the way the film is shot,
like everybody has to be a little more up close
and stuff, and you couldn't really squeeze anyone else in
There is some obvious composite work where they were filmed
in like a fake boat and put on the river digitally,

(01:23:20):
but all right, anything else, Like, overall, I think the
movie was pretty good. I enjoyed watching it. We've been
I think we've been unnecessarily harsh on it because we
just decided to not say any of the positive stuff.
But yeah, I like the relationship between Kevin Bacon and

(01:23:41):
the kid. I liked a lot of the tension I
thought worked. I liked the stuff with the dad, like
trying to become a hero at the end and he
wasn't as successful as he was hoped. You know. Overall
it was I think it's a pretty good movie. First
time watching for me too, and I liked it.

Speaker 4 (01:23:57):
Yeah, I'm pretty sure I saw it when it came out.
But it's like, yeah, it's I mean, it's one of
those movies that here's it's a perfectly good movie. It's
the whole thing. So if you just want like a
kind of thriller with decent actors in it and it's
not poorly made or anything like that, there you go.

Speaker 3 (01:24:17):
If you're flipping through and you get to TBS on
a Sunday afternoon, this could be on and you could
watch it. It'd be fine.

Speaker 5 (01:24:26):
Yeah, they wouldn't have to add it up very much.
Maybe just some language.

Speaker 4 (01:24:29):
Ye, Meryl Streep's collarbone.

Speaker 7 (01:24:32):
Thanks for calling the Midnight Driving No one is here
to take you call. For more info, check out the
Midnight drive In on Twitter at emn drive in pod,
or find us on Facebook. If you want to email us,
send it to the Midnight Drive In at gmail dot com.
Remember no outside food and drink. Anyone cut performing sexual

(01:24:53):
acts at the drive in will immediately be taken to
the office. Unspeakable things will be.

Speaker 3 (01:24:59):
Done to you.

Speaker 5 (01:25:03):
Well, I may watch this last episode. I watch Anohing,
that's what about you done?

Speaker 3 (01:25:12):
I watched a couple of things. Well, I went and
saw Together, which is in theaters right now. You know
it's it's everyone knows what it is, right, it's really used.
So I guess if people don't know what it is.
There's a couple they're having relationship problems suppress surprise, but
they're moving away to like the country together, And I

(01:25:35):
guess the spoiler free version of a plot description is
that they stumbled into like some old well and they
get infected with something, and now they are becoming attracted
to each other, like physically attracted to each other. Where
like it starts with him like starting to feel like
sick when he's not around her, and it turns into

(01:25:58):
eventually they're just like literally like if one of them
falls asleep, the body will start dragging itself towards the
other person somewhere else in the house, and we come
to learn that they will. I don't I don't know
how far to go with the spoilers, but let's just
say that they eventually they will physically merge if they

(01:26:18):
allow themselves to touch, and so like when they start
touching each other, they start to realize like, oh, we
can't separate. At first, it's just like, you know, kind
of like our skin is sticking together. Later there are
other body parts that stick together in a rather entertaining scene,
and eventually it leads to you know, them to like
physically cut themselves separate, which I think is alluded to

(01:26:41):
in the trailers. Yeah, the movie is it is simultaneously
frightening and funny in a way that like like Texas
Chance On Massacre is like that, you know where you're like,
I can't believe this is fucking happening. This is so
horrific that it's making me laugh. It does that a
few times, you know, it has these great moments of

(01:27:02):
like so like it's alluded to in the trailer at
one point, so I don't feel like it's a spoiler
where they have to like use a saw to cut
themselves separate. But what you don't know from the trailer
is that, like when that happens, then it cuts to
them sitting on the kitchen floor with bandages on their arms,
like just eating snacks out of a fucking like tupperware,
and they both kind of like offer each other like

(01:27:23):
a little bit of the snack that they're eating, and
you're just like, yeah, like they think lean, they're clearly
traumatized from going through this, and so is the audience.
We all need a little like laugh break right now,
and they know where to put that in. We sort
of get a background story to what's happening, but you
don't really need to know. It's not like plot wise

(01:27:45):
is not important. What you need to know is that
they're basically their bodies are physically trying to pull each
other together and the results are are pretty good. I
would just yeah, I'd recommend it. It's definitely like kind
of pretentious art house cinema, but it's also ad horror.
It's horrific, it's funny, it's the acting is really good.

(01:28:05):
Apparently this is a real life couple Dave Franco and
Alison Brie. I learned that after I'd seen the movie
that they were a real life couple. But I'm like, yeah,
that makes sense to bring that up.

Speaker 5 (01:28:15):
I sent you a video from the Letterbox YouTube page
where they were talking about movies they've watched together. Yeah,
and you're you were just like, man, they spend a
lot of time together.

Speaker 3 (01:28:26):
It's like, oh care, apparely you would if you were
married to each other. But yeah, I really enjoyed the movie.
It's kind of it's really hard to discuss it has.
I found, like gonna say, the relationship drama actually felt
really real as well, which I think helped the movie
move along. And like the opening parts where you're like,

(01:28:47):
you're not into the body horror stuff yet there's a
lot of like I don't know, without getting into the
details of what's going on in their relationships that won't
be exciting podcasting, but you buy into it, like the
tenshi that exists between them and this idea of they're
sort of at this moment of like, look, she's moving
away for a job and he doesn't really want to go.

(01:29:08):
But if he doesn't go, then are they breaking up?
Like I does want to do that either kind of thing,
and they're having that kind of problem. And so it's
executed really well. This movie has by far the best
use of Spice Girls in cinematic history, which is it's
actually really important. Flat wise, I'll give you a spoiler
free thing is when early in the movie when they

(01:29:31):
start referencing the Spice Girls vinyl that they he bought
for her on their second date. That's Chekhov's Spice Girls.

Speaker 5 (01:29:38):
Like it.

Speaker 3 (01:29:39):
It becomes really important later on. It's so it's a
huge recommend if you're into like Cronenberg stuff where if
you like the substance all this kind of stuff that's
been coming out lately, I would definitely recommend it. It's
They do a great job too with like the dialogue
of like the problems in their relationship and then reusing

(01:29:59):
the same dialog later to discuss the problems associated with
this like weird thing that's happening to them, and you're like, okay,
that's that's clever. I appreciate that.

Speaker 5 (01:30:09):
So, yeah, I want to check this out. I was
hoping to go like over the weekend, and obviously I
was too busy to do that.

Speaker 4 (01:30:18):
I definitely I enjoyed the trailers they came up before it. Yeah,
where it's like a movie about code ebinds.

Speaker 3 (01:30:27):
No, But like again I would say, like it's it's
horrific and like the Body Horror Works, it was really
fun too, So like like watching it with an audience,
I think it would be a good idea because it's
you get to experience everybody else's reaction to what's happening
on screen as well. So like I like, I always

(01:30:48):
enjoy that element of seeing a movie like this is
watching other people squirm and laugh, and you know certain
moments where somebody's squirming that somebody else is laughing, and
you're you know like, yeah, you're both right, that's the
appropriate reaction here.

Speaker 5 (01:31:01):
So do you think this in the substance would make
a good double feature?

Speaker 3 (01:31:04):
I do. Nice, this isn't much like it's a smaller
movie and it's a calmer movie and a quieter movie,
but I still think they would go well together. It's
I really enjoyed it.

Speaker 5 (01:31:16):
I might yeah nice.

Speaker 3 (01:31:18):
So yeah, and then what else do you want to
what else I watched?

Speaker 5 (01:31:22):
Right? Sure, I didn't watch anything, so.

Speaker 3 (01:31:26):
Really okay, So the only other thing I watched is
a movie called A Final Exam. It's a slasher from
the eighties, just.

Speaker 5 (01:31:33):
The one where they prank a terrorist event to get
out of taking a test.

Speaker 3 (01:31:39):
I know it's not to get taking a test. It's
just a random prank. It's service purpose.

Speaker 5 (01:31:44):
But that was this movie because I've seen it and
I was just like, it seems a little extreme.

Speaker 3 (01:31:49):
Yeah, it's it's a pretty it's it's pretty over the
top moment the least, I don't really I really don't
have a lot to say about the movie.

Speaker 5 (01:31:58):
It's I don't remember being It's.

Speaker 3 (01:32:00):
A cheesy eighty slashers. There's not really any great kills.
There's nothing really special about it, considering how many of
these came out, Like, why is this different from the rest.
It's not the only thing I would it has going
for It is like the one character is like a
true crime nerd and a horror movie nerd. So when

(01:32:20):
you go to his dorm room, like there's all these
like posters hanging on the wall from like horror movies
and stuff, and you're like, oh, yeah, that like became
a trope later on, but this was nineteen eighty one,
so that was kind of new. Maybe this film was
a little bit ahead of its time there. But other
than that, I mean, it's a random stalker shows up

(01:32:41):
at a college. It's the end of exam periods, so
that's why a lot of the people have gone home
and there's only a few kids left. That's a pretty
clever way to do it. If it had had much
better kills, I probably would have really enjoyed it, because
it's just a slasher movie.

Speaker 5 (01:32:57):
But maybe you could do a triple feature with this
graduation Day and night School.

Speaker 3 (01:33:05):
Maybe probably not gonna like this, probably because I probably
want to ever watch this one again now that I've
seen it once. But who knows, though, like ten years
from now, when I forget that I've watched this and
turn it like to be recommends it to me again,
Like what about this one? I'm like, I've never heard
of that one. They get halfway through and the terrorist
attack happens, and I'm like, I try.

Speaker 5 (01:33:24):
Buy the van with the guns, and you're like, oh,
you know it.

Speaker 3 (01:33:29):
But at that point I've already hit play, So what
are you into? So? Yeah, yeah, that's all I watch.
There's not There's not much to say about a final Exam.
I don't necessarily recommend it. Unless you're just a huge
fan of eighty Slashers and you want to watch all
of them, and you have a list on your computer
and you just keep going down it and picking random
ones and watching them, then you should probably watch it

(01:33:51):
so that you can highlight it and take it off
the list. But what are the odds that there's somebody
else doing that? So you got nothing, Brian, because you're
busy going conventions all.

Speaker 5 (01:34:04):
I'm just trying to think of what did I spend
my time doing over the past week. I don't I
don't think i've watched any more.

Speaker 4 (01:34:11):
I can't believe you did not go to the Reanimator
or fucking reunion.

Speaker 5 (01:34:17):
Was on Sunday.

Speaker 3 (01:34:18):
Why is that? Why does that matter?

Speaker 4 (01:34:21):
Jeffrey Combs.

Speaker 5 (01:34:23):
Well, she was there. I walked by his table. I
saw him.

Speaker 4 (01:34:26):
Okay, but we're Reanimator still.

Speaker 5 (01:34:29):
Jeffrey Stipe. I saw him. I saw Barbara Crampton, I
saw the other dude who is not Jeffrey Comes. I
saw him.

Speaker 4 (01:34:37):
Did Barbara Crampton have her weirdly old boobs out? Because
that seems like soy.

Speaker 5 (01:34:47):
She's in her fifties. She deserves to age gracefully.

Speaker 4 (01:34:51):
Sure, but it's weird to be sitting at a booth
with your tits.

Speaker 5 (01:34:54):
A still looks amazing for for being over fifty. So
she's also very very tiny. Kim Kim Kursinger is the
only one I saw who was taller than me. So
Devin Say was pretty short. Daniel Harris is very short.

Speaker 3 (01:35:09):
She's very tiny. I remember one time I was at
a convention and she walked by and I was sitting
down and she was standing up when we were about
the same height. I'm just assuming she hasn't grown since then.
That was a long time ago.

Speaker 5 (01:35:22):
Somehow in her forties she didn't hit a gross spurt.

Speaker 2 (01:35:24):
No.

Speaker 5 (01:35:26):
I picked up the Freddy's Nightmare soundtrack on vinyl.

Speaker 3 (01:35:31):
That's important, you want to have that, YEP.

Speaker 5 (01:35:33):
I listened to it and I was like, oh, three
of these songs are pretty good, and I had buyer's remorse.

Speaker 3 (01:35:39):
So I suspect that's one of those things you buy
because you want to have it on your shelf more
than you want to listen to it over and over again.
I used to have a copy of the Jazz soundtrack
on vinyl and it was just in a frame hanging
on my wall, which was neat, but I never like,
wasn't going to listen to it, you.

Speaker 5 (01:35:54):
Know, But I pull out like the Manta Squad and
one every once in a while and listened to, you know,
the Bloodsport one has become like my cleaning music. Get
you all hyped up.

Speaker 2 (01:36:05):
There?

Speaker 3 (01:36:05):
Right?

Speaker 5 (01:36:07):
Oh, I will say, because me and Cindy went and
Cindy's daughter at the last minute came. She wasn't going
to and I'm just like, what's she doing this weekend?
And Cindy was like, nothing, Well, she can come as
she wants. She's not like, not invited to go, so
she's not really into horror movies. I didn't think she'd
enjoy it, but she went and she was at least

(01:36:29):
able to find something she was excited about because there
was a booth that made crafted like each individual one
was hand crafted. They had multiple versions of Audrey two
from Little Horrors and she is a big theater nerd,
so she loves like musicals and stuff, so she's into

(01:36:52):
Little chap of Horrors and she picked up an Audrey too.
She was pretty excited about.

Speaker 3 (01:36:56):
That's exciting.

Speaker 5 (01:36:57):
I was just happy she found something to be excited about.
And in the middle of everything, lots of clowns, lots
of art art, the clown walking around. Of course, yeah, uh,
I don't know.

Speaker 3 (01:37:08):
I don't want to get back into a terrifier thing.

Speaker 5 (01:37:10):
But nope. I bought these little VH eighties VHS magnets.
They had like a whole board of them, and then
you just pick which ones you want, and I of
course picked Mantra Squad because why wouldn't.

Speaker 3 (01:37:22):
I makes sense.

Speaker 5 (01:37:23):
And then Night of the Creeps was right by it,
so I'm like, well, I mean you got to go
with Fred Decker combo. And so I was trying to
be like it was like three of them for like
fifteen bucks or something. So I was like, well, what's
my third one going to be? And then I saw
the Blob. I was like, it's got to be the
eighties Blob. Of course, I'm trying to think of one else.
Cindy met Billy Zane and as I mentioned mentioned in

(01:37:48):
the uh in our chat that it took everything I
had not to yell out because of Noah, you better
not be fucking up.

Speaker 4 (01:37:55):
Don't be Billy's ay.

Speaker 5 (01:37:59):
I'm like, well, that's that's it's an easy way to
get boot to out of the convention opprission. The interesting
thing is Cindy was at a second hand shop on
Thursday because Billy's Ane was like a last minute edition
they announced him on like Wednesday maybe, and so I
sent that to her. She was in the second hand shop,

(01:38:20):
there's one like in the town she lives in, and
they had this Phantom movie magazine on the shelf, and
so she picked that up. She's like, I'm gonna need
Billy's and I'm gonna have him sign this. And I
looked at it is the Phantom official movie magazine. So
I'm assuming one issue came out, because why would there
be two issues? And so it was interesting because when

(01:38:43):
we got up there, she put it on the table.
Billy Zane and his assistant looked at it and they
both went, what is this And apparently neither one of
them had ever seen this, like they've this is never
crossed in front of him before, so he was actual,
it is I'm like that, I'm like, you just had
an awesome moment. So he actually took a couple of

(01:39:04):
seconds and like flipped through it and looked at it all.
He was kind of amazed. He's like, I have never seen.

Speaker 3 (01:39:09):
This before, so that's kind of neat.

Speaker 5 (01:39:12):
Yeah, So it was kind of a fun, fun moment.
This is this was her like first I'm getting a
celebrity to sign something for me type of moment. So
Billy Zayne the one and only she got for the weekend.

Speaker 4 (01:39:29):
So it's weird too because I feel like, at the
height of Billy Zaye's career, he was such a fucking
huge actor. And I'm guessing his table is not horrible
like some people's, is what I would guess. His table
isn't like a fucking overpriced nightmare.

Speaker 5 (01:39:50):
I mean, it was about on par with everybody else
that was there, except for Robert England. Because Robert England,
something's happened in the last five or six years where
his is ramped up like you would not believe. So
I don't know if it's everybody's like he's gonna die soon.

Speaker 4 (01:40:04):
So it definitely is his. I was looking at because
he was almost the reason why I went on Sunday.
And then it was like, oh, if you want to
like go to his table or do a photo op
or get anything, you have to like pre register and
are you.

Speaker 5 (01:40:20):
Going on Sunday?

Speaker 4 (01:40:21):
No? No, I I thought about going, and then I
found out Lollapalooza was going on, and I was like
fuck it.

Speaker 5 (01:40:27):
No, No, The traffic around there for Lollapaloosa was nil.
The problem is there was this there was a card
show at the convention center next door, and it includes
like sports cards, gaming cards, like everything, and so they
had a bunch of weird like sports people over there,
one of which was Bo Jackson and apparently from UH

(01:40:49):
because then it started advertising that show on me and
Cyndy's Facebook. She was looking at some of the comments
and apparently Bo Jackson was a complete asshole to a
lot of children that weekend. Wow, what are you gonna do?
But then Spike Lee was there for some reason. I
know he's kind of famous for sitting courtside with the Lakers,
but the nixt or whatever team he follows. I'm gonna

(01:41:11):
get shot because because I just said he says for
the Lakers.

Speaker 4 (01:41:15):
I was gonna say, yeah, I'm surprised that Spike Lee
wasn't just there to stand across the hall from the
horror movie people who talk shit and be like horror
movies or movies the White Man.

Speaker 3 (01:41:28):
You guys, you guys know that at this point in
the podcast, you're discussing the guests who arrived in an
event you didn't go to. Right, the listeners are just
expected to put up with this if they want to
get to the part where they hear what we're doing
next week.

Speaker 5 (01:41:41):
Well, but Spike Lee was at a card convention. I
don't understand why, because he wanted to be. I heard
somebody else on another podcast talk about they went over
to meet him specifically at that convention and said he
was super nice and cool the entire time. So maybe
that was a better choice.

Speaker 3 (01:41:59):
But so Noah was just being racist when he made
his assumptions about him.

Speaker 4 (01:42:03):
Maybe that was more of a joke about his movies
than him himself.

Speaker 5 (01:42:06):
Yeah, Robert England's prices are outrageous anymore. Yeah, Billy's aims
was fine. I was, like I said about on bar
with everybody else, Umm, I was it going to bring
up something about that I can retally forgot what it was.
I don't know something I did. Just remember we do
have feedback for this episode.

Speaker 3 (01:42:26):
Nice.

Speaker 5 (01:42:27):
Our good buddy Chris sends an email saying congratulations on
three hundred and fifty episodes and here since the beginning.
Thanks for all the entertainment over the years. Uh, you
three have something special going on, looking forward to at
least another three hundred and fifty. Fear God, I hope not.

Speaker 4 (01:42:44):
It hit it in with psychomote?

Speaker 3 (01:42:50):
Is that the Chris is he the one that used
to write into our previous podcast too brand He the
one that we used to pretend we didn't know who
he was all the time because we're very clever and funny.

Speaker 5 (01:42:58):
Yeah, I think it's the first time Chris is right in. No,
thanks Chris.

Speaker 3 (01:43:07):
Yeah, I know we appreciate feedback hypothetically. It's been so
long that I can't I can't remember if we appreciated
all the feedback we got previously. It's been so long,
but I'm.

Speaker 5 (01:43:16):
Sure we would have for got actual sum at some point.

Speaker 3 (01:43:20):
The other listeners were as good as Chris, we would Yeah.

Speaker 5 (01:43:24):
Oh, I met Sean Spinks at the convention he's a listener,
talks about how you listened, used to listen to horror,
et cetera all the time. I was like, well, we
all did.

Speaker 4 (01:43:33):
Also also the inventor of spanks.

Speaker 5 (01:43:37):
His name was Spinks, so that's a weird h but
I was not aware he was an artist and he
was selling a bunch of artwork and he gave me
a chopping mall sticker and I was like, oh, bro,
I need this. How much is it? And he's like, no, no,
there will be no no money exchange, just enjoy. And
I was like, oh, come on, man.

Speaker 3 (01:43:58):
That's amazing, Like those are the little things you get
from you know, you got a sticker for four hundred
episodes of podcast, including the previous one and now this one.

Speaker 5 (01:44:10):
Yeah, my time is paid off, man, So I think.

Speaker 4 (01:44:13):
I think, still to this date, my favorite getting recognized
at all from a podcast story is the dude who
went into the shot that Randy worked at and saw
his Murph and the Fat Kids sticker and sod. I
was like, I listen to them even though like we
were on you guys' network and you guys have.

Speaker 5 (01:44:33):
Been around for so much longer. That was like, that's
so fucking funny Randy. It was like, I don't even
listen to them the world do you listen to? What
the fuck?

Speaker 1 (01:44:43):
Here a brief glimpse of some of the prove fine
pictures we've got touled them in the near future next week.

Speaker 5 (01:44:50):
I had so much fun talking about thrillers. This week.
We got to keep that train of going. But on
top of that, we have to talk about how how
much the medical some socks in America. So we're gonna
be talking about two thriller films the deal with insurance

(01:45:12):
medical stuff sort of. Uh, so we're gonna be talking
about nineteen nineties Eric Roberts star The Ambulance in the
nineteen eighty eight Dennis Quaid Slash and Meg Ryan Vehicle DA,
which stands for a dead on arrival.

Speaker 3 (01:45:31):
Yeah, I know what do A stands for? But how
did you find movies that I've never heard of? Put?

Speaker 5 (01:45:35):
Oh?

Speaker 3 (01:45:36):
Really, I literally never heard of either of those.

Speaker 5 (01:45:39):
Oh. I've been wanting to watch The Ambulance for a while,
just not had a chance to.

Speaker 3 (01:45:42):
I would probably click on The Ambulance if I saw it,
And then when I found out it was a thriller
and not a slasher about a guy driving around in
an ambulance. So it turned off.

Speaker 5 (01:45:53):
We get a quaid, we get yeah, we get a quaid.
I was about to say the good quaid bit he's
turned on us in the past couple of years.

Speaker 3 (01:46:02):
Yeah, he's I would not call him the good quid
at this point. I would suggest that his brother was a.

Speaker 5 (01:46:07):
Good question jack quid. He was getting a good quid.

Speaker 4 (01:46:09):
I was gonna say the bad quaid.

Speaker 5 (01:46:12):
That is not insane, yes, uh said he was reading
off the list of people. Apparently a rainy quaid was
at that convention as well. Across the street. I should
have went over see if he still had a beard
and was still fucking nuts.

Speaker 3 (01:46:27):
I don't think you stopped being nuts. I'm sure you
know how things work.

Speaker 4 (01:46:29):
But what if you went and talked to him and
he was just super calm and he goes, oh, no, man,
that was just it was all performance, are you know?

Speaker 5 (01:46:36):
Yeah, when Joaquin went on Letterman.

Speaker 4 (01:46:41):
Say it was all Joaquin Phoenix, it's.

Speaker 5 (01:46:44):
The same thing. And then I'd be like, oh my god,
the Hollywood whackers are here, and he'd be like, oh no,
ship would get up and run out of the room.

Speaker 4 (01:46:51):
They're gonna whack us off.

Speaker 5 (01:46:55):
I think that's what you meant. Randy Quaid, Yes it is,
and he just fronts out the door. Used to be
so funny, that's just sad.

Speaker 4 (01:47:07):
Here, come on, comedians and depressing mental illness, this kind
of thing.

Speaker 5 (01:47:16):
Go hand in hand. Did you know Ellen lives on
a chicken farm?

Speaker 4 (01:47:20):
Now?

Speaker 5 (01:47:20):
And okay, who does Ellen?

Speaker 3 (01:47:24):
Ellen?

Speaker 5 (01:47:24):
Degeneration?

Speaker 3 (01:47:26):
Yeah? I mean sure, I guess I don't. That makes
as much sense to me as anything I did. Put
killed chickens on the list. So we've got a week
of that coming up one day.

Speaker 1 (01:47:34):
Now.

Speaker 4 (01:47:34):
Is that because she's into chickens? Or is that because
she's a lesbian and she felt obligated?

Speaker 5 (01:47:43):
It's because she wanted to get away from Trump. So
they moved to the UK, a nice simple life and
bought a farm. And then they realized, oh, we're going
a farm is hard work. This is bullshit.

Speaker 3 (01:47:54):
Is chicken farmer or lesbian stereotype? No?

Speaker 5 (01:47:58):
No, it just seems like I do also got one
hundred percent if it's a chicken farm, I know it
is a farm. I may have just added the chicken
because it sounded funnier.

Speaker 3 (01:48:07):
I think, all things considered, it seems unlikely Ellen would
want to be around male chickens what are called what
are called cocks? If anyone's trying to guess.

Speaker 5 (01:48:15):
What my joke is, it's a sophisticated one. It's like
a real thinker.

Speaker 3 (01:48:24):
I said it and then realized that, like, you know,
the people who listen to me talk probably aren't gonna
be able to be sa together.

Speaker 5 (01:48:32):
M Killer chickens? Is this beaks and killing birds? Aka
is Zombie five?

Speaker 3 (01:48:39):
Correct? Jesus, we've done Zombie three and four.

Speaker 5 (01:48:46):
You got to move on to the birds.

Speaker 4 (01:48:47):
I don't know if you guys remember this, but there's
a there's a bouncing head and one of those that's
bring it, good lord, so we should we should keep going.

Speaker 5 (01:49:01):
This list is all over the place.

Speaker 3 (01:49:04):
Well, I am making a promise that some of the
weirder shit is gonna come. It's gonna be coming off
the list.

Speaker 5 (01:49:13):
So that's just like, let's get weird. Let's do a
bunch of weird shit.

Speaker 4 (01:49:16):
I was gonna say, it does feel like it's been
a while since we got uncomfortably Italian.

Speaker 3 (01:49:23):
Yeah, don't worry. The Necrophilia Week one of the movies
is Italian, so it's entirely possible. The guy's going to
have sex with the dead body, and then later in
dialogue revealed that she was underage.

Speaker 4 (01:49:33):
Well, I was gonna ra underage and related to him.

Speaker 3 (01:49:36):
Yeah, yeah, underage or related to him. We don't know
if it'll be and we haven't seen the movie yet.

Speaker 5 (01:49:44):
Fucking Italians, although at this point America is not far behind.

Speaker 3 (01:49:53):
Oh yeah, I mean they're you guys are putting kids
to work now, so.

Speaker 4 (01:50:00):
Yeah, we got to reveal those child safety work claws
because freedom.

Speaker 5 (01:50:06):
Yeah, there's been some report that was the governor of
Utah just loosened up the regulations on a underage.

Speaker 4 (01:50:18):
Law about marriages.

Speaker 5 (01:50:21):
Now, it was something about statutory rape or some shit
cul cuck cool, but it was specifically to get somebody
he's related to, a lesser sentence who apparently did something
with a thirteen year old.

Speaker 4 (01:50:38):
Ah, Jesus fucking god, damn it.

Speaker 5 (01:50:41):
We're so good.

Speaker 3 (01:50:43):
I mean, two, you guys are as a country. Yeah,
I mean, it's just who you are, that's all.

Speaker 5 (01:50:50):
We're having big fights about Sidney Sweeney being in American
Eagle commercials.

Speaker 3 (01:50:54):
I've refused to get involved in that one because I'd
have to learn so much about that. I'd have to
learn what america An eagle is. I'd have to learn
who Sydney sween he is. Look, I'm staying out.

Speaker 5 (01:51:03):
Of it so far.

Speaker 3 (01:51:07):
For me.

Speaker 5 (01:51:07):
The worst thing that's come out of it is they
revealed it. Uh, she's a registered Republican and voted for
Donald Trump. And I was like, no, I kind of
liked you because you were kind of hot.

Speaker 3 (01:51:18):
So again, I don't need to know who she is.
I don't need to know who she voted for.

Speaker 5 (01:51:25):
Fine, wrack up a country. Does anybody have anything fun
that we can sign off with? So we don't end
on a dollar?

Speaker 3 (01:51:31):
You do want to end on that?

Speaker 4 (01:51:34):
Uh? Funner than a conversation about American eagle to world's
most milk toast ass boring fucking clothing store.

Speaker 5 (01:51:43):
I used to wear a lot of American eagle clothes.
It's probably a surprising nobody.

Speaker 3 (01:51:49):
Somebody donated an American eagle sweater to me when my
house burned down, so I owned one for like a
couple of months until I got around to rebuying clothes.

Speaker 4 (01:51:56):
Yeah, American eagle is to button up plaid to what
H and M is to the color beige.

Speaker 3 (01:52:05):
You know more about stores than I do.

Speaker 5 (01:52:09):
My entire closet now is just horror movie T shirts.

Speaker 4 (01:52:12):
So I'm mostly at this. At this point, I have
streamlined things down to a Hawaiian shirt plus h drawstring shorts.
Like that's if I'm allowed to decide what I'm wearing
and not going to work, that is what the fuck
I am wearing.

Speaker 3 (01:52:31):
I don't I don't know that somebody who describes themselves
that way should be criticizing other people's clothing. I might
have to come down on the side of American Eagle
and H and M or whatever it was.

Speaker 4 (01:52:41):
No, you, you mistake me. I think it's funny, but
that doesn't mean I'm actually making fun of the people
who wear it. If you like fucking flannel, more power
to you. If you like beige, you get that that
membership card at H and M, get all them beige clothes.

Speaker 3 (01:52:59):
You have to go to an H and M. Just
so I can contradict.

Speaker 4 (01:53:02):
You, I'll the next time I met the mall, I
will send you a picture of Like, you think that's
a joke, but it very literally H and M is
what happens if somebody said, what if beije was a
personality trait? Like everything in there is beige.

Speaker 3 (01:53:22):
I mean, I'll take your word for it, and I
don't need pictures of that. Thanks, that's fine.

Speaker 4 (01:53:26):
Yeah, they've really mixed it up. Now you can get
light beige, dark beige.

Speaker 3 (01:53:32):
They got nothing. We should have ended it on the
depressing political talk.

Speaker 1 (01:53:36):
Please remember to replace the speaker on the post when
you leave the theater.

Speaker 5 (01:53:49):
And I it's time to say good night.

Speaker 1 (01:53:52):
We sincerely appreciate your patronage and hope we've succeeded in
bringing you an enjoyable evening of entertainment.

Speaker 5 (01:53:58):
Please drive home carefully and come back again.

Speaker 4 (01:54:01):
So good night,