Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous Real-Life Stories

Morning Crankers: Comedy - News & Outrageous Real-Life Stories

Wake Up & Laugh with Morning Crankers! 😂Tired of boring headlines? Morning Crankers is your ultimate national source for unfiltered comedy, real news, and the most outrageous stories happening across America. Join your hilarious hosts Jeremy Hanson ("Hans") and Dan Baker ("Gred") every Tuesday and Thursday, with bonus specials and unique segments scattered throughout the week, as they dive into the latest current events, the wildest pop culture moments, the most bizarre real-life tales, and even unleash some hilarious comedy songs they write themselves!This isn't your average news podcast; it's a hilarious, honest, and often irreverent take on what's trending, what's ridiculous, and what really matters. Hans and Gred cut through the noise with sharp wit and infectious humor, ensuring your day starts with a smile, no matter how crazy the world gets. Perfect for your commute, morning routine, or just when you need an escape into pure, unadulterated comedy.From bizarre local happenings to viral internet phenomena and the most talked-about USA headlines, Morning Crankers delivers the laughs alongside the latest updates. Get ready for wild conversations, hilarious commentary, and that unique blend of funny news and original comedy music that only Hans and Gred can provide.Tune in to Morning Crankers for: Hilarious News Commentary: Our comedic take on politics, pop culture, and daily headlines. Outrageous Real-Life Stories: The craziest, most unbelievable tales from around the country. Original Comedy Songs: Get ready for laughs with our uniquely written humorous tunes! Unfiltered Comedy: Authentic, spontaneous laughs and witty banter from Hans & Gred. Flexible Listening Schedule: New episodes every Tuesday and Thursday, plus surprise bonus content! Start Your Day Right: The perfect podcast to brighten your morning commute or routine. Don't just hear the news, laugh at it! Subscribe to Morning Crankers now on Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and wherever you get your favorite comedy podcast. Morning Crankers Podcast is packed with laughs, outrageous headlines, and unfiltered commentary that makes it perfect for your daily drive or weekend unwind. Whether you love bizarre news, viral stories, or hilarious takes on current events and pop culture, this show hits every note. From comedy songs to wild real-life stories, we bring you the best in satire and original humor. As one of the top weekly podcasts blending news and laughs, Morning Crankers is your go-to for headline hilarity and American madness. #ComedyPodcast #NewsPodcast #FunnyNews #OutrageousStories #CurrentEvents #Humor #Laughs #WeeklyPodcast #BonusEpisodes #PopCulture #Satire #EntertainmentNews #RealLifeStories #UnfilteredComedy #MorningShow #USANews #AmericanNews #Headlines #WildStories #PodcastForCommute #ComedySongs #OriginalComedy #MusicComedy #PodcastHumor #NationalPodcast #TalkShowComedy #BizarreNews #ViralStories Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/morning-crankers-comedy-news-outrageous-real-life-stories--6463272/support.

Episodes

"Smurfs, Space Germs & Mitey Pillows: Mayhem on the Morning Crankers!"

May 23, 2025 • 40 mins
On this wild ride of Morning Crankers, we crank up the chaos with a mix of comedy, curiosity, and candid commentary. May 23rd brings us a stacked lineup: we kick off with today’s National Days (and yes, we try to celebrate them all wrong). Then it’s onto a headline that defies belief — a woman missing for 60 years is found alive! From Earth to orbit, we cover China’s space station discovering bacteria from outer space — what could ...
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Morning Crankers May 19: National Days, Hotter Than a Possum's Armpit, Millionaire Wins Lawsuit & More! 🌟

May 19, 2025 • 33 mins
In this outrageous episode of Morning Crankers, we dive headfirst into May 19th's National Days with our signature comedic twist, and we turn up the heat with our hilarious hit song, "Hotter Than a Possum's Armpit," featuring a special cameo by Bill from Curious Cars. But that's not all! We also break down the jaw-dropping story of a millionaire who won a $100,000 lawsuit in England after being falsely accused of skipping out on a ...
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🔥 "Hotter Than a Possum's Armpit: The Ultimate Summer Anthem" 🌞

May 18, 2025 • 4 mins
Get ready to sweat, laugh, and sing along to the wildest summer anthem you've ever heard — "Hotter Than a Possum's Armpit!" This hilarious and catchy song from Morning Crankers will have you feeling the heat and wiping the sweat while you belt out our over-the-top lyrics. With a surprise cameo by Bill from Curious Cars, this tune is a perfect mix of toe-tapping rhythm, outrageous humor, and enough Southern sass to keep you grinning...
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Dr. Cranker’s Outrageous Medical Advice – 10 Things You Should NEVER Stick in Your Butthole!

May 13, 2025 • 5 mins
Welcome to the first chaotic, hilarious, and wildly inappropriate episode of Dr. Cranker’s Comedy Clinic on Morning Crankers! In this outrageous skit, the infamous Dr. Cranker shares his top ten list of things you should absolutely NEVER stick in your butthole. From pineapples to live hamsters, fireworks to self-help books – Dr. Cranker’s dubious but hilarious medical advice will leave you laughing and cringing in equal measure. Tu...
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Big Trailer Booty, Ancient Weapons Hoard, and Wild True Crime – Morning Crankers May 12, 2025

May 12, 2025 • 37 mins
Get ready for a wild ride on today's Morning Crankers! We kick off with a hilarious performance of our brand-new song "Big Trailer Booty," bringing the laughs and the rhythm you crave. Then, we dive into some jaw-dropping stories from around the world: archaeologists uncover a 2,000-year-old weapons hoard, a swarm of mosquitoes fills an entire plane, and a United Nations Judge is convicted for owning a slave from Uganda. The madnes...
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"Morning Crankers: Shark Myths, Puffed-Up Dolphins, and Dr. Cranker’s Debut!"

May 8, 2025 • 32 mins
Dive into another wildly entertaining episode of Morning Crankers, where today we explore the deep blue and beyond! We kick things off with a look at the National Days you didn't know you needed to celebrate. Then, we plunge into the bizarre world of sharks, including some of the weirdest species you've never heard of and the shocking claim that influencers are causing a rise in shark attacks! But that's not all—discover how dolphi...
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"Breakfast Sneezes & Sith Comebacks: Cranked Up and Outta Control!"

May 2, 2025 • 25 mins
On this May 2nd episode of Morning Crankers, chaos reigns supreme—from crime-trained animals pulling off petty thefts to a man literally sneezing his guts out over breakfast (talk about a bad start to the day). We dig into the shocking #1 box office hit "Sinners", dissect why Revenge of the Sith might be getting its long-awaited revenge 20 years later, and explore the murky past of Operation Mockingbird and its ties to Stuccimedia....
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"Aliens, Air Fryers & Surfing Dogs: Mayday Mayhem on Morning Crankers!"

May 1, 2025 • 31 mins
Buckle up for the wild ride that is Morning Crankers, May 1st edition! We dive into the chaotic brilliance of Tom Hardy’s gritty new Netflix flick Havoc, preview the epic crossover clash with the new Alien vs Predator movie, and ask the question nobody else will: Why are people getting turned on by their air fryers?! Plus, we fetch some laughs with a canine surfing competition that’ll have your tail wagging, explore how Jobu became...
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"Parrots, Pyros, and 464 Pounds of Trouble | Morning Crankers"

April 29, 2025 • 28 mins
On today's episode of Morning Crankers, chaos reigns supreme! We kick off with a rundown of today's National Days before diving headfirst into some of the most absurdly hilarious news you won't believe is real. First up, the "Dirty Diddler" shocks the courtroom by turning down a plea deal. Then we flap into the insane case of a woman convicted of killing her husband — thanks to a parrot’s testimony! We also talk about a man who tor...
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Dead Broke Blues – A Morning Crankers Comedy Classic

April 28, 2025 • 3 mins
You’ve got 37 cents, a busted flip-flop, and a wallet full of expired coupons—but at least you’ve got a soundtrack! Dead Broke Blues is the ultimate comedy anthem for anyone who's ever played hide-and-seek with their checking account. Brought to you by the hilarious minds of Morning Crankers, this original song turns financial despair into full-blown parody gold. With honky-tonk twang, cartoon chaos, and more sad laughs than a tax ...
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"Draft Day Drama, Robot Waiters, and Roasting the NFL | Morning Crankers"

April 28, 2025 • 30 mins
On today’s episode of Morning Crankers, we serve up a wild platter of news, laughs, and pure chaos! We break down the latest drama surrounding the NFL Draft and give our hilarious take on Shedeur Sanders facing some serious heat at the NFL roast. We also dive underground — literally — as we explore the secretive world of a Colorado Springs underground club that's making headlines. In more bizarre news, a Milwaukee judge finds himse...
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Made in CHINA, Paid in Blood – A Morning Crankers Comedy Song

April 25, 2025 • 25 mins
Get your satirical shades on—Morning Crankers just dropped their most unapologetically hilarious original song yet: Made in CHINA, Paid in Blood. This punchy parody track tears into consumer culture, global trade irony, and the glorious absurdity of buying cheap while paying the moral premium. With savage lyrics, explosive humor, and Johnny Bravo-level bravado, this tune roasts the modern marketplace while keeping the beat loud and...
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"Cheese Heists, Naughty Nuns & Ozark Shenanigans – Tipping the Scales of Friday Fun!"

April 25, 2025 • 30 mins
It’s a full-on Crankers Friday, and this episode is melting like a stolen block of cheddar! We dive headfirst into the mystery of $400,000 worth of cheese vanishing from Neal's Dairy (yes, cheese crime is real). Then things get spicy as we uncover the tale of Joan of Leeds—a medieval nun who said "no more nun for me" and faked her death to go chase a little... fun. In other insane headlines: a live hand grenade is found inside a ch...
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pring Time LOVE – A Morning Crankers Scent-sational Romance

April 24, 2025 • 2 mins
Love is in the air... and so is the scent of questionable cologne and wild Ozark flowers! Spring Time LOVE is the newest original comedy storytelling song from Morning Crankers, bringing you a skunky spin on spring romance. This toe-tapping tale follows a hopelessly romantic skunk and his sassy woodland crush in a Pepe Le Pew-style pursuit through the backwoods. It’s awkward, it’s adorable, it’s pheromone-filled mayhem! Packed with...
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Can I Hold You Again? – A Morning Crankers Comedy Ballad

April 24, 2025 • 3 mins
Pour one out for your broken heart and belly laugh with Can I Hold You Again?, a teary-eyed yet side-splitting comedy song from the lovable lunatics at Morning Crankers. It’s the anthem for every soft-hearted romantic who's ever ugly-cried to a breakup text, sent that late-night “u up?” message, or tried cuddling a body pillow with a name. Dripping with fake sincerity and real hilarity, this track hilariously flips heartbreak on it...
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Love is a Dumpsterfire – A Morning Crankers Original Comedy Song

April 24, 2025 • 3 mins
Get ready to fan the flames of chaos with Love is a Dumpsterfire, the latest unhinged anthem from Morning Crankers! This original comedy song hilariously dives into the flaming wreckage of modern relationships—awkward dates, explosive texts, and emotional meltdowns included. It's raw, ridiculous, and weirdly relatable. If you’ve ever loved, lost, or simply watched someone else's relationship combust like a fast food bag on fire in ...
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"Real Men Don’t Exfoliate: The Heist of Manhood & Dirty Dick’s Retirement Party"

April 24, 2025 • 31 mins
On today’s Morning Crankers, we unleash our brand-new comedic banger “Real Men Don’t Exfoliate: The Heist of Manhood”—a testosterone-fueled anthem for the gritty, the grimy, and the gloriously un-groomed. We break down April 24th’s National Days (spoiler: still no “National Bacon-Wrapped Chainsaw Day”), celebrate Missouri leading the charge in nuclear energy (BOOM, baby!), and explore groundbreaking feline science—do cats' butthole...
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    "Aliens, Chupacabras & Snickers Coffins – Hump Day Gets Weird!"

    April 23, 2025 • 22 mins
    Welcome to the Morning Crankers Comedy Podcast—where news meets nonsense and Hump Day hits harder than a chupacabra on your deck! In today’s wild ride: 🛸 We dig into a declassified CIA document on remote viewing—yes, the government actually tried Jedi mind tricks.
    🇷🇺 Then it's off to Russia, where a KGB doc claims aliens turned soldiers into stone. Medusa? E.T.? We’ve got thoughts.
    🦌 A deer wanders into a YMCA in Kentucky, probab...
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    "Pee Science, Snakeheads, and 1955 Wife Tips – Welcome to Crankerland!"

    April 22, 2025 • 31 mins
    Buckle up and brace yourself for a wildly hilarious ride on Morning Crankers, where today’s show dives headfirst into the absurd, the scientific, and the downright retro-ridiculous. We kick things off by honoring the April 22nd National Days (some of them will blow your mind), then reel in a whopper of a story about invasive snakehead fish spotted in Missouri waters—yep, the ones that can breathe air and walk on land like creepy li...
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    🎙️Morning Crankers – Monday Madness: Celebs Say the Dumbest Things, Rav4 Comes Home & Credit Chaos Uncovered!

    April 21, 2025 • 33 mins
    Buckle up, buttercup, because this Morning Crankers Monday is a rollercoaster of ridiculousness and revelation! We’re serving up a full plate of chaos with the dumbest celebrity quotes ever uttered—from “is the moon part of the Earth?” to “I don’t believe in mirrors”—yes, these are real. Then, it’s time for a patriotism-powered twist as Toyota announces plans to manufacture the Rav4 in the USA (finally!). We brush up on the best el...
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