Episode 12: The Journey Within: Finding Forgiveness Amidst Chaos

In this deeply introspective episode, Craig navigates through a maze of personal pain, anger, and forgiveness as he discusses his tumultuous relationship with his ex-wife, who has become involved in a controversial spiritual community. Craig reflects on the complexities of trust, ego, and personal growth while shedding light on the dangers of blindly following charismatic leaders. He openly shares his journey toward self-discovery and love, touching on the struggles of being vulnerable and the power of true forgiveness. Tune in for a raw exploration of healing, love, and the search for inner peace.

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:05):
It will false start there. I forgot the unmute I
was saying it was muted. That Jordan, who works with
me helps edit and stuff. He said, you need to
start it off and introduce it, say who you are
and all that kind of stuff. That's the way it's
been done. I'll talk mid sentence and mid feeling or

(00:29):
whatever it is. This podcast is really spontaneous. It's a journey.
It's ever changing, just like life is. I have different
places that I go that I share with you, discoveries
and also some of the pain. And yeah, some of
the angers. People are comedy sound angry, you know, it

(00:51):
depends who's listening. Yeah, and everybody has anger. Yeah, we
all have it. I've been ashamed of it sometimes or
been shamed for it. And I'm gonna forgive myself for that.
And we'll talk a little bit of forgiveness today. I'll
set My intentions are to bring you up to speed

(01:13):
on where I am in present moment. That's all we have.
We just have. Now. I attend a Sunday songa it's
called It's a mindfulness song that's been going on for
four or five years and it's from Philadelphia. The leaders
from Philadelphia. I mean it talks about in mindfulness, is

(01:36):
about being in the now. I actually have a watch.
All it says is now on it it'stead of the time,
because that's all we have. But it makes me laugh
because I go with a Philly accent. Now it's now.
So anyway, we're gonna talk about now. Now, Craig is
in a I'm in a really good place right now.
It's some beautiful discoveries. Yesterday, the path took another road,

(02:04):
like the Wizard of Oz that you know that they
go down this path and they come across a scarecrow
that's the mind, and then they come up down another
road and they put these apple trees that are throwing
apples at him, and suddenly they discover there's the ten
men he needs, like a sponsor with an oil can,

(02:24):
another guide, and then they come across the lion, and
the lion is really me because he's got this all
this bravado. I have bravado sometimes. I mean, it's just
where I come from. And whatever it is about being
a man and the discovery of being a man is
I'm going to talk about that today as well. It's
been pretty It's an interesting road. Where are the role models.

(02:48):
I certainly didn't have one with my father left when
I was born. He became a cult leader. Ironically, do
I want anything that he became. No. Someone pointed out
that my search when he left when I was born,
my search was for the father inside of me, and

(03:10):
you're a part of that search. I'm finding that this
podcast has different agendas, different pathways that it takes. Like
the Wizard of Oz and the Lion, he just comes
across as this and underneath he's a dandelion, and I

(03:33):
am too. I can never have said that before Philadelphia
you're gay bag whatever it is. Oh yeah, to get
attacked I'm from. But I do think there is I
do think that there's my personal experiences. I think there's

(03:53):
been too much of an adjustment of not being so
concerned with things like that, like calling names and shaming
and all that stuff and bullying that they call it that.
Maybe maybe it does call for some things like that
and some disruptors. And I think that that's what this
is about, too, is there's a lot of disruption that's

(04:14):
going on here for me in this process and hopefully
for you as well. I've mean getting amazing Thank you
for the I shouldn't call them amazing. They're just they're
emails that are coming in. I won't define as amazing,

(04:36):
but they do hit my heart, especially when they're recognizing
they're recognizing something within them that they relate to with me,
and they're talking about courage that it takes and so forth,
and I'm trying to keep my ego out of it.
It's nearly not about that, but I do think that's

(04:59):
a word that I think that we all need more courage.
That's my experience. I don't want to I don't want
to play small. So what you have today, someone wants
to play big. And the way I want to play
big is not big and tough. No, it's more of

(05:24):
the dandelion. It's more of the love, light and levity,
and I mean grand love. Love is the debate of
what I do. By the way, many of you may
maybe never heard of me or whatever. I did very
very well in stand up, very very well in stand
up comedy, way beyond where someone should be coming from

(05:49):
where I come from. And people talk about the pain
that I've been through, Yes, I've been through pain. Oh
this is really important. I don't want people to feel
sorry for me. Thank you. I get it, and I
have felt sorry for people that have been through circumstances
like this and even worse or better or whatever it is.
I'm not doing this for that appreciate it. Don't need rescuing.

(06:16):
Some of this discovery I actually would hope would rescue
possibly someone who's in pain. Love and service. That's my
major reason for living my life anyway and doing this podcast,
Love and Service. There will be opinions on how it

(06:37):
should be delivered and what I say to them when
they analyze a joke I tell on stage or whatever.
It's like, Okay, go do do that for yourself. I
value people's experience much more than their opinion anyway. This
is one of the problems I've have with wellness scriptors
and the personal coaches who aren't really qualified. They're not
qualified because they haven't experience, not because they haven't studied

(07:00):
or something. They don't have experience to share. There's no
recovery to their process. There's no answers and solutions that
they that are scalable, sustainable. They have worked for a while.
I'm going to listen to the people, for instance, relationship,
they've been married a long time, they work some things out.
I want what they have, so I want this. Definitely,

(07:28):
yesterday was really confirmed. I just want grand love, God,
divine love. I don't want to do things based on
your judgment. When I was in this deep state of
consciousness unconsciousness yesterday, when was doing this process, something came

(07:51):
up to me, is like, let your mother's voice go.
Let your mother's voice go. The other thing that came
up was, oh, my God, my relationship with my mom
is something I should share with people, because that's what
I'm going to have with everyone, including my ex wife.
I don't know if I've shared this before. I don't
write this stuff down, but she and I had a

(08:12):
very difficult time for many years. Definitely I thought this
about her, and then I would find evidence to gather
about her and she's not a good mom and all
this kind of stuff, and other people would agree with me,
oh that's a terrible mom and all that kind of stuff.
But and one day I'm not going to tell the

(08:32):
story again because I think I told her before. But
the bottom line on the story is I got into
this place of really big God love and radical acceptance.
Was what God told me. And if you have a
problem with God, I get it. I used to replace
the word with higher consciousness, higher power, soul, force, the

(08:56):
force from Star Wars. That's what that movie is. That's
why I love it so much. It's mythical. It's really
about the force of God, the force of good, the
force of light, love, light, levity, whatever you want to
call it, something that says that this exists inside of you,
this great potency that wishes to be released, this great

(09:17):
love potency, it wishes to be released, but we are
taught to put it down. Me saying the word God.
If somebody wants to put that down, that's your other
side of you, that dark side. It doesn't want to
really really feel this unbelievable life that we have. And
I I've had this longing my entire life, but I

(09:39):
just didn't know where how to get there. And maybe
one of my goals in this thing is to kind
of like be your Shirpa, be your guide into this
space of love, light and levity. And I feel that
I just feel magnificent, brilliant, feel with effervescent enlightenment. Not

(10:03):
all the time, but mostly, and it's mostly it's more
than it ever was, which gets me to Lotus the cult,
the cult leader in this place that I am. Now
I'm learning something that I went to her Facebook page.

(10:28):
I was always blocked, but I found another way in
and I posted. I posted stuff that I'm thinking, Oh,
her followers are not gonna like this, and sure enough,
a follower of hers who used to be my fan,
actually she came to my page and like this, said
these really nasty things. Some other people said some things,
and she went in there as their victim. She went
as a victim into that page. Didn't think I would

(10:49):
see it. Your ex husband attacked me and had other
people attack me. It's her perspective and her perception. I
get it. And all I got from this post was Wow,
what a sad, sad, angry woman who's saying to me
that I'm angry. That's what I pick up. And I

(11:10):
started to go out a little bit with her and
then just let it go, but she blocked me anyway.
As soon as I said, she's get out of here.
No one wants to hear from you. This is what
she says. Because my axe hadn't seen it yet, because
it wasn't erased yet. Now it's down and out. But
what I said was she has all these vanity posts.
She literally just posts, here's some things about me you

(11:30):
might want to know. Following her leader, this is what
her leader does, or just leader just talks about herself
every single fart that she's had, and this is what
they do. It doesn't make any sense, It doesn't make
any business. It doesn't do anything except for just feed
some ego and I file for divorce from my ego
years ago, and wow, does it feel better? Of course

(11:52):
it enters into the equation. Of course, some ego pops
in right and left. But it's not for you to
judge that with me, And it's not for me to
judge that with you either or the hipocrisies or whatever
it is. It's just not up for me to do that.
It's up for me to judge that in myself. So
I I got in there and I said, oh, but

(12:15):
a woman who oh. She said something about feeling attacked.
What do you do when you're attacked? And she has
all these lists, which was so funny that the one
thing that wasn't on the list, would you run away?
Would you do one thing that was not on the list?
Is be honest? That's what I always ask of her.
Be honest, she's choosing, just like her leader. They choose

(12:37):
what people see, and it's all not what the whole
truth is. That's for sure. You're not gonna see the
ugliest and neither one of them. They might do one
to get somebody to go, oh, me too, or whatever
it is. That's all they're about is me too. I
don't mean the me too the hashtag. I mean me too. Oh,

(12:58):
that's exactly how I feel. I mean, it's unbelie believable.
And it becomes another cult. These Facebook groups and or
the followers, they just become another cult. There's no one
questioning her if this is true what she's posting. It's
all about vanity, it's all about praise. And I thought

(13:19):
to myself, Wow, you had a husband who praised you
every day every day. You're the greatest woman ever met.
That's what you had. And all their solutions have to
do with some perception that they have that they really
take on. And that's as the truth. This is the
truth about men, it's the truth about sex. This is

(13:40):
the truth in this And I'm gonna pound it into you.
I'm gonna pound it. I'm gonna keep saying it until
I actually believe it. It doesn't make it true, it
doesn't make it scalable, doesn't make it something that's ever
worked in even life. They're just theories and concepts, and
that's what they bring. That's what I see. Anyway. I
have never seen this work, but I've also never seen

(14:02):
it work. My approach, my approach of pointing things out,
my approach of pointing out hypocrisies. What I said was,
what about no violence? What about no I just had
all these answers. I filled up the wall. It's all
taken down now on Lotus's wall. But it was kind

(14:25):
of fun. It was kind of fun too. That was
one approach. So here's what I have to say to
anyone who's in a situation. It doesn't have to be
this understanding about this podcast. This is not just about
a cult, which people even question, is that a cult
that she follows this woman? I believe yes, and I

(14:46):
believe it has all the qualities of it. So you
can believe whatever you want, and you could also think
that it's an attack. I don't believe it's an attack
because it really does come for love of my children. Mostly.
That's that's the core of everything. Don't feel sorry for
my children. They have their own path. I'm trying to
prevent them from being any more hurt on that path.
As a matter of fact, when I had my beautiful

(15:07):
enlightenment yesterday, I turned to them, I came back and
I said, I love your mother, I love you, and
you can go to Japan with her. And they were
beautifully lit up. Of course I'm afraid of letting her
go out of the country. Of course still exists. That
fear still exists. I've seen what Lori Valo did to
her children. I've seen documentary after documentary about what happens

(15:31):
to people when they get in the cults. Jim Jones
is the famous drank the kool aid and all they do.
They still the expression did you drink the kool aid?
It still exists. It's people that follow to the point
that they give their lives. How do I know that's
not the case here? And do I want my children
to have their lives taken because someone is in such

(15:52):
denial and it's so wrapped up in empowering someone else,
of course I don't. So for anyone that does thinks
it's fear, not fear one, it's definitely fear and whether
it thinks it's anger or resentment or rage or wanting
your back or anything. Okay, take a breath. Check out

(16:13):
a drone view look from above. Look at this guy
dedicated to his family doesn't make them dedicated back. Love
my family with everything I have doesn't mean they'll love
me back. Sacrifice everything I have doesn't mean they'll do

(16:39):
it back. Generous beyond measure doesn't mean they'll be generous back,
or even think this I have found to be my
experience with other children in my family as well. Definitely
my ex wife a lot of taking, and I have

(17:06):
to work that out in my soul. And how I
do that. My ego wants them to thank me. My
ego wants to be praised the same way I'm making
fun of her for wanting to be praised on these
Facebook posts. We all recognize ourselves in one another. We

(17:26):
hold up our mirror to one another. I was just
dating someone and I said something about a mirror. We
could do that for each other, because so I propose,
I think it's a wonderful thing. She said, no, it's
not for me. So it's not for everybody. Not for everybody.
I enjoy having a mirror. I enjoy putting the mirror
on myself, and that's what I'm doing here is this

(17:47):
isn't about blame. This is about just blame. It's concerned,
it's fears, it's you're just gonna hear it all, but
also solutions. And my solution yesterday is this. I watched
the kids feel released, and it happen several weeks ago
when I let them go out of state. First it
was a state. Now it's like, go anywhere in the country.
Tell the I'm going to tell Mommy, you can't go anywhere.

(18:10):
I'm skinned of the trust trust God. So that's what
has come down to for me is I just got
in this place, this absolute energy of God that's so powerful,
more powerful than the cult leader. Now do I wish

(18:32):
that Lotus stuck with that in our marriage, of course,
but I didn't stick with it. So I can understand
how trust is not built if I don't stick with
my own values, if I stop doing the practices that
keep me there, which has me there today. By the way,

(18:53):
look what happens. I become the phony. I'm preaching this,
but if I don't practice it, practice what you preach,
as they say, so yesterday I practiced. I practiced a
point of I always say repetition causes intuition. My intuition
started to speak to me. For the last over twenty
four hours. Now I'm watching shifts take place. Even in

(19:17):
my children's everything became looser. We did breathing exercises when
they woke up today and I took them before I
took them to school. They're cranky in the morning and
they won't eat and all that, I said, raise your
hands in the air, let's do my I do high exercise.
Ha I no, I got. I got a little crack
a laugh out of them. And that's the way to

(19:39):
start the day. That's the way to live the day
is really do live in that natural, organic place that
I call love and I call God. So here's the
tip that has never worked. But by the way, the
love thing I think I've explained this before is when

(20:00):
I make amends, that's pure love, that's pure accountability. That's
the only place it can be. If you're accountable. You
can only be in grand Love or God because otherwise
your ego is going to talk. You're never gonna admit
these things. But it works. Does it work all the time? Yeah,
it works all the time. Does it work all the
time like through time? No? No, because I slip, I

(20:25):
go back, don't do my practices, don't stay in love,
get in resentment, get in fear, all of those things.
So I'm manifesting some of these things. And what I'm
saying is if she were to come back to reality,
if she were to step away, it ain't gonna happen
from me saying it. Nothing's going to happen from me

(20:46):
pummeling her as she is perceiving it to be pummeling.
So when she says he's abusive, I can understand it
because I'm pointing these things out that can feel like abuse,
challenging her its abuse. I get it. I hate that
word because it's not technically abused. When you get labeled
abusive and then you get in with the abusers, you know,

(21:09):
the physical abusers and stuff like that, it sucks. That
really sucks being a guy, by the way, because people
have talked about this before. They ain't gonna listen to you,
and not going to listen to the guy, the big guy,
especially a big guy like me, with a lot of
them behind what I say. But there's really love here.
I really, really so much love, even for people that

(21:31):
perceive I might perceive as an enemy. Say pray for
your enemies, forgive, forgive myself first, and then forgive them.
So yesterday I wrote to her, I love you, I
forgive you, and I said some other things that were

(21:52):
basically like a reset, and she said, thank you, I
love you and forgive you too. Good start, because I'll
tell you the other I've never pressed enter in any
of my long assed emails, which always get me into trouble.
I've never pressed enter and it comes back. Craig, I've

(22:13):
never thought of it this way. Thank you for enlightening me.
Oh wow, you are such a wonderful spiritual man. I
don't know how I ever would have left you. I'm
in a complete agreement, Craig. You're right. All of those
things that I have done are absolutely wrong, and I apologize.

(22:37):
It's not gonna happen. But what can happen is me
changing my energy. I'm back to my story about my mom. So,
my mom didn't speak. We didn't speak for five years
or so, and I was really really in it how
wrong she was. And one day it was a true shift.

(23:00):
Do you hear about these things you don't really believe them,
or you don't really think it can happen for you.
I don't think I could happen for me. You know,
these conversations in my head are going to continue defending myself.
My mom should love me. Whatever it was, And it
really happened to the point where there is nothing my

(23:23):
mother could say to me that it is going to
hurt me here affect me nothing because all I do.
We had had a conversation today, We talked that was
a pretty upper level too for you know, pretty deep
for mom, because she's very set in her ways. Blah
blah blah. But I'm okay with her being sent in
her ways. That's the thing, is complete acceptance. Okay, this

(23:44):
is the way. I'm not going to change her. Talk politics,
whatever it is, it's not going to change her. So
why bother. Same with my ex wife. So if she
is to break free from the these this woman, it's
got her. I'm about to show you some or describe some.

(24:05):
She took another another dip, a big dip into a
very very dark pool. I'm not happy about it, to
tell you the truth, I'm not. I'm pretty it really
upset me. I might have told you before. I read
the posts from Broke when they were in Australia together

(24:28):
and she started bragging about her one night stand and
sneaking out of the hotel. Meanwhile, my wife at the
time was on that trip. It was a trip to
for more multi level marketing. Let's go celebrate our celebrate
our womanhood and all this kind of stuff. I get it, ladies,
I get it. I just asked you just watch it.

(24:49):
Just watch what happened with this woman, happened with my
ex wife. You're e masculating a man who stepped up
and became your husband, masculating a man who is the
father of your children. You're taking down a man who
is there and supportive and loving, all because you have

(25:12):
a selfish need to not only go outside the marriage
for sex. I get that, but to brag about it
and boast about it and try to get others to
follow you. I don't know. I'll leave that up to
the listener. What do you think? And that's what she did.
And I remember Lotus, when she came back from Australia,

(25:33):
I said, oh, where's Broke. Oh she stayed, she had
to go find herself. And she starts with the posts
about you know I had a sexless marriage and know
all this kind of stuff, and you don't have to
either just keep it to yourself. Not you don't have
to either, and you can break free Mama's and all
this starts, this rhetoric starts. Uh oh, that's where it started.

(25:57):
That's why I saw whoa Oh, she's taking all of
this in. She is captured by in love with this woman.
But never could I ever have predicted this, Never could
I have predicted this. What happens, sir, I'm trying to
find my trying to find the posts that they've had

(26:20):
recently that I'll read to you. They took another step together,
she calls her soul sister. Those all these terminologies, all
this terminology. I'll read this to you. I'd like to
actually read a Some of the feedback I'm getting here

(26:40):
is your podcast is blowing my mind. I don't understand
women to do this so much, to be thankful for
and walk away from that. Yeah, that's true, but I'm
just getting Here's another one says I wanted to drop
a note and say, oh sorry, I'm about lotus. I
have been watching her social from the sidelines and looked

(27:03):
into some stuff she was promoting. Yeah, I didn't have
a great feeling about it, and so much of the
new age is now darkness and disguise. I couldn't have
said that any better. I've left it all behind myself.
I love your resilience and using your massive gift to
help others. Anyway, take care and keep laughing. I guess
that sums up everything. Not to feed my ego, to

(27:25):
let you know that that's a lot of this is
about that. So maybe you can have your take be
that instead of maybe this guy's you know, he's got
an agenda, you know, used to you know, get over yourself.
You get to the healing already, and somebody say that,
you know I mean, And then there's these people that

(27:46):
it's connecting with, and and there's so many of these,
so much of this feedback I appreciate. Thank you for
your feedback. Thank you for taking the time and gifting
me with that. So I know that somebody's hearing this
and really getting the message that's out there. I'm really

(28:06):
about being of service and helping people. So maybe you
might be in some sort of a situation. It's so
frustrating to deal with mental illnesses or just one of
the worst things. And I do believe, and not in
a condescending way. This is mental illness. It's people that
can make someone a guru and hand their power over.

(28:32):
Here's one of their episodes. So now they're doing a
podcast together. And by the way, she lied and said, oh,
she's just a friend. She would always say just a
friend all during the marriage and say, hey, I think
you're getting canned here. She already brought you into that
other cult with Raven, and Raven ended up suing everybody,
including Broke and her husband at the time. Yeah, you're

(28:54):
in a cult, so you're vulnerable to be in a cult.
You're in one now. She admitted that that was one
that was at least eighty grand out of my pocket.
I had a lawyer once. By the way, if I
would express this, if I'd say, I'm so, this is unbelievable,
this is not fair because you sound like a misogynist.
And that's what sucks in our society. Yeah, I got
mad for a second. That's what sucks in our society

(29:14):
is you try to express yourself as a man and
you get labeled so fast, angry, bitter, U mean spirited.
You know, cheater, whatever it is. Men are pigs. Literally,
we're called pigs. I'm trying to express my feelings as well,
and women ask for a vulnerable man who expresses their feelings.

(29:35):
And I've cried in front of them. I already ever cry,
but I was demean and diminished for doing that, you
pussy like I bought some goods here. So anyway, Australia,
thing happens. I say, hey, you know, what's with that?
You know, vouls of marriage and all that kind of stuff.

(29:57):
And again I'm not judging the cheating part. We can
all talk about that. It's a whole other topic. But
it's the announcing it to others. And what I said
to her at the time, I go, you know, Lotus
her real name. I didn't say you know, I say,

(30:17):
you know, those children, those young children are it's just
gonna get back to them. This is about their father, who, basically,
because she's saying, is inadequate in bed and I'm not
gonna work on it anymore. I'm gonna go find it
somewhere else. He's inadequate as a man. He's inadequate. One

(30:38):
of the worst things you can say to a man.
That's what Lotus did with me, you're inadequate, You're not
a real man. I'm gonna move into another room, is
what she did. I'm gonna cut you off now when
I need you. I'll return to the room. When I don't,
though I'm not, I'm gonna keep going to this woman

(31:01):
who's going to keep on feeding me information on what
I could have out there. And that's what she did.
So she's saying this, and I said, Lotus said, this
isn't cool. It's gonna get better. She goes, oh, no,
it won't. Her children don't are on social media. So
what she said, which that's probably what behind, is behind

(31:22):
what I'm about to show you and announce to you
here that she's now what she's doing. And when I
wrote to her a few times once from this nice
space of kindness and love and forgiveness and this is
what I really want to be and I'm gonna codmit
to it. An the other on was like, what the
hell are you doing? Or admonishing won't get me anywhere,

(31:43):
But anyway, I'm just telling you where I'm coming from, honestly.
So they now have a podcast about sex, but not
only about sex. This is what one of those says,
join us as we unravel the mysteries of b DSM.
Does everybody know what BDSM is? Then what many people
do it means bondage, dominance, sato masochism. I believe that's

(32:04):
what it means. And I've seen broke posing with whips
and all sorts of writing, crops and leatherwear and all
this kind of stuff, showing everybody how great she looks
at her age and how she's got her freedom and
everything else. Why does everyone have to know your sex life?
What's the agenda here? Why are your Why is your

(32:29):
perspective the way we should go? And come on, Mama's
get your freedom and you can have this too, this illusion.
And I'm putting forth there pictures in bathing suits, pictures
in scantily clad that my son said, she looks like
she's on OnlyFans a fifty some year old woman. This
is what she's compelled to do to lure people in.

(32:50):
It's a lure. It's a thirst trap, as they say.
And my wife got trapped to the point where she
would defend this. I'd say it'll get back, Oh yes
it will, because any parent that sees this. I remember
even when I was a kid. My mom is the
only devorce around. Good looking mom, good looking woman. My

(33:10):
friends like pregnant, one of the dater, my mom and
my mom, you know, dressed like a single woman who
wants to meet somebody. And there is these schoolmarm mothers
in the neighborhood that get pissed off at their that
their you know, their their husband is flirting whether or
looking at her over the hedges or whatever it is.

(33:34):
So I was on the other side of that. Call
my mother a whore or whatever it is. That's without
the Internet, the gossip that happens, she had, she had
a man over whatever it is. I don't know, you know,
I recalled. I recall the shame and the bullying and
the I'd be in fistfights over the things that they

(33:58):
said about my mom. So I can't imagine once this
leaks out, what my children will be subjected to. And
these women operate in such an it's with such selfishness.
What in the world are you posting this stuff for?

(34:19):
What in the world. I can tell you why I post.
I post as I want to entertain you. I'll make
you laugh, I want to inspire you and make you think.
Whatever it is, but it's not to come join me
in my Here's what they say, what is really? What
is BDIs How can it serve as a path to

(34:41):
profound healing and connection? We challenge misconceptions that come from
the deception BDSM is a harmful way and explore how
consensual kink can empower and rejuvenate not just relationships, but
our inner selves. Discover with us as we discuss, it's
the transformative power of embracing pain as pleasure and finding

(35:04):
deep presents through intimate exploration. For more conversations about sexual awakening,
open and healing, join our Facebook group. So they have
a Facebook group they have witchcraft is hashtagged and something else. Anyway,
this is what they have an episode Healing through Pleasure

(35:27):
exploring BSM for deeper connection. So here's the thing that
I would propose to anyone who leaves their marriage and
goes this direction. What I would say to both of
these women, why would you not explore this within the

(35:48):
context of your marriage? Why quit before the miracle? Why
not those hours that you're putting colluding with one another?
You go girls and all that, Why not put that
into the man that married you and prayed with you?
To have children with you in divine order. Why would

(36:13):
you step away from that and put your concentration into
something on the outside, this illusion that, oh it's let me,
let me dispel the myths and all that kind of stuff.
How do you know? How do you know that it works?
So it works temporarily. Who the hell doesn't have temporary fixes?
So you want to share your temporary fixes. It's not

(36:35):
long term because it's all new. Have you ever seen
anyone where's the results of that? I want to see.
I want to see data. I've seen data on people
that immerse themselves in a god relationship. I have seen
it happen. I've watched couples be together for years upon
years and still love one another. And that's what I

(36:56):
wished for in that marriage. We brought in two children,
and I will be honest with you, we literally prayed.
We literally prayed for both children, both born in our house.
Not the way Philly guy would have done it, but
I'm glad that I did. Flooded the place on Jackson,

(37:18):
her son Hope, I said his name, flooded the place.
I had to pull him out, help them, Not the doula,
the midwife, birth whatever, I'm blanking on what she's called
anyway I studied, and all that all goes out the window.
By the way, that's to make a man feel important. Breathe, breathe,

(37:39):
I remember going, get away from it. You're annoying me.
Go this is what I was taught. I think it's
that's I'm just saying this for the first time. That's
kind of symbolic for our relationship. Is I've been taught
these things that you're supposed to do to be a
feminine man, to be a part of the ani mob,
the ani mos, but to be a part of this

(37:59):
this fi I'm an in world that we live in.
Get away from the macho guys, which I never liked. Jeez,
I never really dug that. But now I'm getting some things.
I'm really getting some messaging that just might want to
go back in time to things when things actually worked,
when people stayed together. They didn't have all these options

(38:22):
to get out and the option of a cult. So
you bring these children to the world with a vow
and a promise we are going to raise you, and
in an instant because someone came along and offered you something,
there was an alternative to this. Maybe boring life, maybe loveless.

(38:45):
Maybe she fell out of love. Why not work on
with your partner getting more love into your life, more God,
more divineness, more light, whatever you want. I want to
call it more potency or togetherness, more force. Like a

(39:05):
Jedi master. They work it, the Jedi masters to become
a master. Work on that, and then what will manifest,
what will happen is guaranteed you have a beautiful life
that you have mastered, but you do it together. There's

(39:27):
no opportunity for that because she went the way of
a woman who influenced her. They call them influencers for
a reason. They can influence and they're really really good
at it. They're really really experts at this at bringing
people in to follow them, the pied pipers follow them

(39:50):
into Here's what she says, how does a woman live
in her femininity in this postfeminist world? Is it? Or
is that your conclusion? There's a lot of conclusions here,
but misconceptions about BDSM. What if it's not a misconception.
What if it's a conception that someone else has experienced,

(40:12):
that they experienced that it led to nowhere. What if
that's their What if that was their experience. Are you
going to deny that people went that way? And I went,
there's not much love here. I'm not feeling love. I'm
just being beaten here. And then it turns into beating,
turns into death, whatever it is. And here's what I'm
trying to get across to her. We have a daughter.

(40:34):
I don't want to be sexist about it, but I
am more concerned about her daughter. What if your daughter
who starts as sexual as she's ten years old, what
if this is her go to instead of love, which
she watched her parents, her mom fall out of love
and get rid of love and just say, I'm going
to blow this whole thing up instead of going more
into the love. Nah, just quit. So on your future,

(40:56):
my little darlings. So I wrote to her with love
in this better space. I said, what are we teaching?
What are we teaching them through this? She says, Oh God,
she loves to say this, this load up broke this
unschooling mom and seven figure earner and Lotus breathwork facilitator

(41:20):
discuss embodying the feminine to live an abundant life from
a bold, unconventional, polarized, and spiritual point of view unfiltered.
Feminine is women who want to experience more freedom in
their lives in all ways. Guess what you're promoting something
that's a lie. I know through experience broke that Lotus

(41:46):
had all the freedom in the world. It's her choice
not to call it that. It's your choice not to
call it that. It's your choice not to take the
road of freedom that is right there before you, to
take the road of integrity, to take the road of honesty,
to take the road of grand love, or a prayer
or a connection that wasn't on the list. All this

(42:10):
stuff is all on the list to deflect away from
what you both did. You both broke up your family
because you believed in your ego. That's my belief. I
always try to share from my first person experience and
not being given opinion. But it seems to me that
that would be something they could explore instead of just

(42:34):
telling people how to live. They have a special Q
and a episode. Who are we questioning? What's your track record?
I can tell you this much, and I try to
say this on our page. Lotus's track record in businesses
is absolutely abysmal. That's a truth. It's not an opinion.

(42:59):
She's failed to every single business. She's quit every single business,
and she quit her marriage. So is that what you
want to teach the kids? Do you want to teach
the kids to not have divine love and sex and
everything else? Do you want to teach them to just
go get your pleasure in pain and kink, as you say,
is that what you would like for the kids. That's
the question. I asked her very gently and trying not

(43:23):
to admonish, And I didn't admonish. I was saying, I'm
concerned that this is this is the direction you're taking.
This is another step away from what I would deem
to be good for a family, is to set an
example where you can work things through, where you can

(43:44):
really have the courage to go into the owl space,
into that pain spot. She's going to a pain spot
by having a guy beat her, which, funny enough, by
the way, her accusations of me where that having me arrested,

(44:05):
when actually she was the one beating me. She turns
that around supposedly afraid goes get safe houses. I just
ran into a guy. Oh oh, I have to share
this story. So I ran into the guy. I probably
described her before she had this text exchange with this guy,
this father divorced father who she's best friends with his
ex wife, and she's got he's calling her babe. Oh

(44:27):
I got you, babe. And I never liked Craig, and
you know all this. I couldn't believe what I was reading.
What to help and we were married at the time.
I said, this is an affair. It's an emotional affair.
Oh no, it's not. I said, well, he's helping you
find us safe. I was, what do you say, Well, no,
I don't need it's just lying right to my face.
She was planning this, these escapes constantly, as if she

(44:49):
was some paranoid person who was being beaten. What she
was being beaten with is the truth. The truth is,
I'd say, hey, can you can you stop following broke
so much and maybe come back to your family. Can
you go on a date with me? Can you can
you give me the honor of telling me where the

(45:11):
money's going. Can you talk to me about your business plan?
Can you pray with me? Can you go to any
spiritual center with me, church, whatever it is, synagogue, I
don't care. Can you do those things? No? Is the answer.
So she turned it around using society's opinion on men.
This is what my opinion is, opinion on men as

(45:31):
men have been to beaters for all these years. Men
are the bad guys. She used it just like my
other ex used it. Oh she knows, she knows this
is gonna be the bad guy. I'm gonna portray it
like that, and you're gonna believe me. With all the
passion I have. You're gonna believe me, And they do.
There are some people that do so sad, so sad

(45:55):
to be on the other side of that. False allegations
ough the worst. But I have to forgive and stay
in a love position, grand love, unconditional love. I can't
have it my love condition upon what she's doing here
and attacking or whatever you want to call it. I

(46:16):
can't base it on that. I still have to come
from that. And by the way, less will happen anyway
if I do stay there, if I respond, it's gonna
be more angst, more conflicts. So she's got this thing
going and he got her a safe house. He said, oh,
I got you, babe, I'll find you. And she found
this safe house and she just lied her ass off.

(46:37):
The level of conniving that I have found. This is
where I always in fear of being the sexist, the misogynist.
Listen to these words, I am not. I am not.
And if I say something that goes maybe bothers you,
if you're a female woman, look deeper. I trust me

(47:05):
when I tell you it's not come from a place
of hate or anger. As a matter of fact, I
love my mother beyond like big time. Can't wait to
talk to my mom. She still says jerky things. Whatever
he judges me all that though, it doesn't matter. That's
what I want to be with everybody. But in this case,

(47:28):
there has to be an awareness first. For recovery. It's
been an awareness. So one of my goals with this
is also maybe someone else can make her aware from
a different perspective. I get all these notes wearing, but
nobody's bringing them to her. Maybe somebody will someday and
say how ridiculus they're telling me, how ridiculously she is,
how absolutely absurd this all is. There's no and I

(47:50):
me pointing out this is not going to do any good.
Oh what does this one say? Ladies? Oh they just
love each other. They just love to hear themselves talk
about how great they are and how happy they are.
And I want to know something. When you make love

(48:10):
with your husband, bringing women, a girl or boy into
the world, whatever, are you not giddy? Can you embrace
that giddiness when that child's born. Can you look back
to that time, say I brought this child into the
world with this man. Can you work on that respect?

(48:34):
Can you look deeper and deeper into his soul? Think
to yourself, you connected with that soul, and you had
a soul crossing and a soul healing, and you brought
these people into the world, only to abandon the entire thing,
the entire idea of a family. You chose this cult activity.

(48:58):
It's something different all the time. This is the latest. Oh,
here we go, here's some she has to boast all
these things. In this episode, Broke discloses how she went
from not knowing that women can have multiple orgasms to
ending up having twenty three orgasms on New Year's Eve
on the beach with some other random guy. She shouldn't

(49:22):
say that part. I happened to know that. Okay, you
had twenty three orgasms. You don't think you could have
that with your husband while keeping your family together. I
know that my ex during this time she feared me.
We got divorced one day and I again, by the way,

(49:46):
this was also from I was giving a lot of
love and a lot of like feedback where I was
hearing her and stuff like that. And guess what, it worked.
I probably screwed it up by going back to my fear.
Yeah I did. She says, come be with me. I say, hey, kids,
I'll be right back. So for anyone that thinks that

(50:08):
she's really afraid, this kind of spells it out or
she wasn't getting orgasms. She had me come down when
we're divorced and make love to her. I remember her crying.
I didn't know what the tears were. Sometimes I didn't
know what they were. I have compassion or whatever it is,
and I think she's basically I think she might have

(50:28):
said something like, please don't fall in love with me,
you know, because she just doesn't. But she had multiple
multiple orgasms, a wonderful time when she let go. She
let go of broke for that one night, and then
she goes back to broke, and broke convinces her, oh no, no,
dear sister, no, my soul sister, no, you come with me.

(50:49):
You come with me, and now she follows the patterns
of bragging about her life, talking about things. It's like,
what's your purpose in doing this? I don't get it,
she said. Did you know that there are many areas
of the body that we can bring pleasure to us
and have orgasms from? The clital orgasm is just the
appetizer to do all the array of orgasms. You'll learn

(51:12):
how to lean into the resistance rather than shying away
from something that can dramatically change your life. You know
what can change your life? I'm talking about going in
and the resistance broke. How about the resistance you have
from the love of your husband and your children? How

(51:34):
about that resistance? And the same goes for lotus. It's
a resistance. What did you do with it? You abandoned,
you left, argue, just did anything you could do to
go out. So as long as you're pontificating, have you
explored that any other thing? They do, both of them

(51:55):
do if anybody goes against them. They have a tan
trum block annihilate bully. It's amazing to me the men
get label bullies and I have never been bullied, and
I was bullied when I was a kid. I was
beaten up to a pulp by I could name the
names and they were vicious. And I will tell you

(52:19):
none comparison to Lotus, this flower child, none compares to
the bullying that she does in the control of the manipulation.
Nothing compares because that is an emotional thing. Scars from
a beating on the outside go away within days. What

(52:40):
she did with emotional abuse, not alchemy, is lasting to
this moment, maybe forever. The same goes for the children.
It's generational trauma. And my old thing is that you
can do do you do better than following this con artist.

(53:03):
We can manifest from having orgasms. We can release traumas
what she says, trauma through having orgasms. Yeah, you can release.
You can release trauma other ways as well. Or you
can release trauma having orgasms with the man you love
or the woman you love. You can. I know this
because it was true, We had that for many years.

(53:26):
It's what brought these children. And by the way, I
can emphasize this more and more. Just tell you again,
people are concerned about the children so far, they are
absolutely so beautiful. You know, I have to think that
they were brought in that energy, in that light. Mommy

(53:50):
wasn't always this way. I don't think she had any
tantrums before that. Now she has tantrums. You know, literally,
I could walk up with I've done with peace, signs, prayer.
Whatever is tantrum? She does this face that is so disassociated,
so angry, so filled with rage, is misplaced rage for
this man who's coming to her in love. It'll get better, though,

(54:13):
because I'm gonna keep on. I'm gonna up the love.
They say, feelings, here's another one. Feeling stuck in a
rut with your marital sex life. Here's your answer, they
should say. Here's your answer. Leave, cheat, steal, lie, become violent.
That's what they should say if they were telling the truth.

(54:37):
It's time to read Night the Spark. In this episode,
we share six easy, playful, practical tips to transfer dull,
routine sex into vibrant and exciting connection. He broke happen
to know your ex husband a wonderful man, dedicated family man,
kind man, smart man, creative man. I'm sure he would
have loved to have reignited with you within the construct

(55:01):
of your marriage. And I know, I know Lotus that's
the case here, But neither one of you had the
courage to go past. It's difficult. You might be afraid
of bruising the man's ego. It's better than running. It's

(55:23):
better than leaving the man going what in the world
just happened? What did I do wrong? In taking that?
Shame on? It's better than calling men pigs. It's better
than calling men assholes or whatever we're called. They talk
about more conversations about sexual awakening, opening, and healing in relationships. Well,

(55:47):
I would love to know if you're sharing with people
giving advice, where's it coming from. It's like a therapist
that needs the therapy. You have no record. There's no
record of this, So Lotus probably she has a boyfriend

(56:08):
right lives in another state. Is this what she's experiencing?
Grand love the kids? She has kids? You know most
of the time, I mean really, so once in a while,
these I guess dominating her or whatever he is, and
whatever the sex that's going on with this guy, I
feel bad for him because he's getting snowed as well.
She can't be herself as long as she's in this

(56:30):
same space, she cannot be the one that I married,
she says. Every time we point the finger and blame.
We have three fingers pointing back at us. So where'd
you get that? In some book, No Kid Broke talks
about how we can open our hearts and share our
feelings without blame and judgment. That's exactly what you've done

(56:53):
with your ex husband now when you came back, when
you're Australia, when her one night stand broke, that's exactly
what you did. You blamed him. Sexless marriage means that
you're not having sex. It's your choice. It's your choice
because you're blaming you're not blaming yourself. Same with same
with lotus. Not blaming yourself. Never does, that's my experience, literally,

(57:17):
never does. It's always about even falling out of love.
And people talk about self love all the time. That's
another new age concept. What does that mean? Masturbating more
doesn't mean you're getting more massages. What does that mean
to self love? Self love would be really, really embracing

(57:40):
the highest power, the highest source that's in you, and
that source would not guide you to blowing up a family,
to humiliating your man, to emasculating your man. There's so
much of masculation that's going on out there. I implore people,
let's take a step back let's not just blame the

(58:00):
man and historical men, the patriarchs and all. Yeah, I
get it. I was that way. I was a feminist.
I get it. I'm starting to get the other side,
though not in a bitter way, but of discovery of
an awakening. There's an awakening that's going on here. I
hope that's what you're picking up as well. And this
awakening will help this relationship that we have. We are

(58:23):
co parenting. We have fifty to fifty custody. We do
pretty well, by the way. That's the one thing she
does much better than the other acts. The other ax
was like doing anything in her power to make sure
I was an evil man, and the kids understood that,
and she's gonna get every hour she can. Tried to
get them to move the Rhode Island with her. I mean,
it was horrible the steps that she took, and those

(58:44):
kids are really really ruined from it. They have a
bitterness and anger in them. It's just it's it's horrible
to observe, especially as a man who's an EmPATH like me.
I mean, I really feel it, and then I feel
there hate towards me, and it was co created. Of course,

(59:06):
I have something to do with it. Of course I
get you know, bossy or whatever, but it's not abusive.
It's not the things that she labeled. It's none of
those things that she just made things up. So here again,
she says, we challenge misconceptions that come from the depiction
BDSM in a harmful way and explore how consensual kin

(59:27):
can empower and rejuvenate. So how do you know where's
the data on this? This is a person that admits
she has no education, but she's coaching and leading people.
I was told by the way. As a matter of fact,
I'm going to put this out there. If you know

(59:48):
of someone an attorney that would take on a lawsuit,
I would love to sue Broke. I heard of a
guy that millions of dollars because he went after the
cl Later, there probably should be UH legal funds to
help people get people out of cults. I had a

(01:00:11):
guest on already, Adam my friend, and we're gonna I'm
gonna have them on again, and I call it Katherine Oxenberg,
whose daughter was part of the Nexium cult and part
of the vow. I'm making some calls to get people
on who suffer the consequences if someone that just loses
themselves and gives them gives it over to someone else,

(01:00:31):
and that's what that's what this happened here and now
it's b D s M. I don't know what profit
comes out of it by having other people join you.
Do you want people to join you in multiple sex?
You know, group sex, polyamorous? I don't know. I don't
have judgment for polyamorous people. I don't have judgment on

(01:00:53):
any on even BDS. I don't have judgment on it.
I do, however, have feelings about what it feels like
to be shamed by children, my peers, and what my
children might feel when people find out about this. People

(01:01:13):
angry at me for doing the podcast, and they think
that's a bad thing. So be it, so be it.
I'm here to stand for my children, our children never
like when people use the word my, and they're not
ours anyway. We're just here to be the custodians. And

(01:01:34):
I like to keep doing that, and i'd like to
and I am going to commit to your hearing it now.
I'm committing to really big time love. Now. You'll hear
slips away, you'll hear my little sarcasm, which I do
very good at that. But let's stay with the energy

(01:01:55):
of healing, solution, unity, togetherness, compassion, empathy. I have compassion
from my ex wife. I have empathy for my ex wife.

(01:02:16):
I could go there. Who am I to say you
could go there? Who are you to say we all can?
Because if somebody is that good, I'm conned. All the
time has happened a lot people have hired. That's just

(01:02:39):
the staff as a revolving door. I have one person's
been with fairly four years. She's amazing. But some other
people they're hiding. Usually I believe the or hiding, stealing,
whatever it is, Honesty is an offense to people. Honesty
is really something that people free tek out over being exposed.

(01:03:04):
I'm here to tell you I'm brave enough to keep going.
I'm brave enough to expose. I went to the Facebook page.
I said many things in response to her posts. Look
at me, Oh my god, I just there's my sarcasm.
I don't care what the plan is. Here's me swimming.

(01:03:25):
Have you ever been swimming? You have ever danced? And
it has a vanity light all the time. It's not who,
it's not who I connected with in marriage. It's just
not connected with someone who is really, really connected. I
believed could be wrong. I believe to her highest source,

(01:03:47):
my dog, he's here. This is another example of love.
Here's Buffy, just sweetheart. She's like me, she's like part
mostly pitbull. So people see this big guy coming at
him and ah, he's get all the answers and he's

(01:04:07):
bullied as I love, my god, he's had privilege. He's
white privileged. He's a white male. And it's like a
lot of opinions happened with that, this pig, this misogynist,
this sexist. Have you said any of those words? Think about?
Have you here? She is with me? Oh my gosh,

(01:04:29):
if you're watching on screen, she might even pop up
on the screen. She got both her paws up on me.
We rescued her exactly a year ago. She was the
last in the kennel. She was there the longest and
was about to be exterminated, euthanized. She jumped into our

(01:04:49):
laps and I just actually ran into this past friday.
I ran into the woman who runs the kennel. She
said she had never seen this dog do that with
any anyone else. She was meant to be with us,
and one of the reasons she was meant to be
with us is the discoveries that I've had. At first,

(01:05:11):
it did not go my way. She got into the
my vitamins and hope. She looked like the last seat
of Scarface covered with powder, my protein powders. I looked
a bit little front Scarface. I mean, she freaks out
at animals like dogs or hair goes up. Here we go,

(01:05:32):
And I had this guy training me to get the
choke collar, the electric collar, and in one day, just
like is happening now? What if you're just gentle and
loving with her again? I hope I'm not repeating myself
for another episode. I feel like I might. But anyway,
this is just where I am right now. She's sitting
right here with me. Excuse me. What if that's how

(01:06:00):
I raised my kids? What if I give them everything
I longed for. I longed for a father, I longed
for love. I longed for attention. I longed for being
listened to. I long to be heard, I long I
long to be seen. I think, actually, that's what's going
on with Lotus. She has these longings, but she was
afraid to have the intimacy is my theory. Now, the

(01:06:23):
intimacy of a man who actually did love her unconditionally
big time. Everything that a woman I've always heard once
I think I bought a bill of goods some of
this stuff. But woman wants to sense humor that before
my comedian think I'd be the stud of the Year,
comedian year, American comedy worth I'm one of the biggest
comedians ever, Like I really made it. A very funny

(01:06:45):
guy obviously very funny, very high level like comedy, but
either not in the front row throwing panties at me.
So sexiest man alive has never been karat top of
the way his brothers. It's some guy with big cheek,
nice cheekbones and everything. So this dog I learned patience,

(01:07:09):
I learned compassion. I learned to see her, I learned
to feel her needs. And there's a transformation that took
place just today. Ran across two King Charles Cavaliers, which
we used to have. This woman is nice enough to
let them be close to this dog as other people

(01:07:31):
are scared of her because she's a lot of pitbull
in her and it was so it's just so beautiful
to be part of a transformation of positive personal journey
that has led to this enlightenment that is pure. It's real.

(01:07:51):
I remember yesterday when I had this big thing happen.
I was just, oh my god, this is real. It's
lasting too, It's lasting in the shower. That's always No.
I talked to myself in the shower. That's where I
do all my defending. Here's what you're gonna say to her, No,
not this time. Here's what I'm gonna say in the podcast.
I'm gonna get it out. No, not this time. It's time.

(01:08:13):
I hope that you're getting the message that we all
need to up the love. We need to raise it up.
And the other voice I was talking about earlier, my
mom voice of fear. You can't do that. I'm surprised
I made it even this far in life if I
had that voice running me, because it's filled with your
in judgment and all that kind of stuff. Keep me

(01:08:34):
down to expose yourself. No no, no, no no no
no no. That voice, thank you for sharing, but it
doesn't serve me. The voice that serves me is this
saying to you that I really believe we should absolutely
take love and put it on steroids, whatever you want

(01:08:56):
to call it. Juice it up, fill it fill with love,
not self love as people call it. And getting a
met patty manicure, pedicure. Yeah, that's great. I'm talking about
really God love and bring that to your partner. Bring
that to the world. Bring that. The world doesn't want

(01:09:19):
to hear your opinion on politics. It really doesn't. You
might think, so that's your ego, it's your arrogance. I
know I've been there. I've been arrogant enough to think
that people give a shit what I say about the
opposing team, which I don't have an opposition anymore. I'm
for positive, I'm for something, not against someone. And I'm
for my ex wife. I am for her. I'm going

(01:09:43):
to love her and forgive her, forgive myself as well continuously.
That's my vow that's my new vow and marriage vows
and now I have these vowels and I do it
for the children too. I just watch their faces. When
I said you can go to Japan, it was unbelievable.
Same one I said you can go to Seattle, out
of state. They're not They don't want to be a

(01:10:04):
part of this. My son said, I said, yeah, so
you're not waking up. You're a little depressed. Last year
he didn't do well in school, and he goes, yeah,
it's talks like this. There was a wake up call
show how the talks are. Hey, what do you guys
want to eat? It's in life, beautiful, let's do a

(01:10:26):
gratitude list. None knows along the line too. It's not
like I have the talks every day, but definitely those
talks because it's not his experience. He's more mature than
I am. My son. He reflects back to me, and
I watch his energy shift. When my energy shifts, I
just watch it. He starts to look me in the eye.

(01:10:46):
He's more present. He checks out because I'm checked out.
I'm checked out of this divine order. I'm checked out
of the ethereal and into my own fear and self
loathing and everything else. So that's it. That's all I
have to say. Today. We have guests coming up again.

(01:11:07):
This is going to be much more than I have
other things to reveal about that I have found out
about Lotus and what she's up to, and maybe someday something.
I do believe that there's some sort of I don't
like the word demonic. I don't like demons or devil
or beels above or dark darkness. We go with that.

(01:11:29):
There's a darkness that's in there that I know is
not really her, and I know the only way out
of that darkness is love and God. I know that.
So that's what I'm going to bring and maybe you
will too. Maybe you can have a talk with her
if you know her, and show her the light. I'm

(01:11:53):
sure she thinks she's having a good time. You know.
They're giggling all the time, always talking about giggling, and
it's childish. And so that's funny because it's childish. The
way they could conduct themselves is childish, tantrums, don't get
what they want, blocking, anger, rage, blame, all the things.

(01:12:14):
They kind of claim that there have breath work that
gets over it. Now, it's not true. My experience is
so far from truth. My experiences. This is someone lost,
gave her power over to this cult leader has done
it with other women. By the way, I have other
I have other letters to read and a man reach

(01:12:34):
out to me about his wife. She she also left
for broke, And ironically I named it broke because they're
all broke or emotionally broke. It's it's really it's a
shame to watch. I'm going to keep standing here. I'm
going to keep standing in my uh, in my courage
and myself and make these stands for the children so

(01:12:55):
that they have it better and starting with me, starting
with me, It's got to be better starting here. And
I already know from her response I've seen it before.
When I get in these spaces, it's great, and I'd
like it to be more consistent. It will be who
knows what will happen, what will unfold, the same with

(01:13:16):
my other difficult relationships. I can't make it happen either.
I can't make the timing happen that i'd like. I'd
like it to be immediate. But maybe we'll see this
in this discovery. With this podcast, it's almost like a journal,
personal journal as well. Maybe you can relate to it.
Please write to me if you do relate to it,

(01:13:38):
or if you don't, If you have any curious curiosity
is much more important than your opinions. That you're usually
veiled with something you're not exploring within yourself. I say usually,
I pretty much know that I've seen it become true
a lot. This This woman on her Facebook is like
you get out of here. No one wants the air

(01:13:58):
from you here. You're angry, angry as language i've ever seen.

Speaker 2 (01:14:03):
Right, he's coming out and he's like, Okay, projection, projection, projection,
that's not how the song goes, but projection PreCure anyway.

Speaker 1 (01:14:15):
Put the projector on ourselves. Let's do that. Let's make
the world a better place. It's a lot of what
this is about as well. All right, please give a review,
pass the word around. We haven't even promoted, by the way,
did I mention this? We're like rated now. I can't
believe we're rated in India, Canada. Thank you, shout out Umbai.

(01:14:37):
What's up Calgaryey? I can't believe it. I've had all
these podcasts with these great interviews with Oscar winners and
everything else, and who knew that just this simple podcast
that's out. Well, maybe it's because the purpose is service.
Maybe because the purpose is absolutely beautiful things that will

(01:14:59):
unfold for people naturally and organically. Maybe that's why people
are connecting with a great where that's where I live.
I live and breathe and organic and natural unfolding instead
of forcing to it now and then. But generally I
like to live like that. Hopefully you do too. Maybe
get some tips, tips on life, tips on relationships, whatever

(01:15:22):
it is. Maybe maybe some miracles are about to occur
for you. I know some are appearing from me right now.
This is a miracle that I'm okay a People say
you've been through a lot. I have. I don't know
if I've described I've had some really tough stuff in life.

(01:15:42):
I share about being kidnapped by a pedophile. People freak out. No, No,
I share that because I am on the other side
of it. And now I get to share it because
other people will feel alone if they don't hear that.
Someone went through and got through. Someone got through divorces.
Someone got through false allegations. Some got through being put
in jail on false charges. Someone got through being attacked violently.

(01:16:07):
Someone got through being beaten up. Someone got through being bullied.
Someone got through poverty. Someone got through being fatherless. Someone
got through it. Yes, got through it. Thriving, thriving. I
encourage you you no matter what, thrive, survive, live your

(01:16:30):
life to the fullest. I love my life. It's somebody
trying to change me just tonight. You know what you
need to do, know you need to do As if
I was saying, I need to do something I need
and I'm not in a good place. This came out
of nowhere. You mean, I need to do that, very
happy like this direction. So that's what I need to do,

(01:16:54):
according to the rules. Be back to future. No rules,
somebody says, anyway, all right, I love you all, and
I love you all. I really do. I love and
your love. Let's connect that. Write a note review. If
it's a bad review, just shut up. I'll pray for you,

(01:17:16):
all right, see you