August 17, 2025 • 28 mins
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:06):
I have, babe.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
See how about a little?
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (00:08):
Does that answer your question? Buddy?
Speaker 3 (00:14):
The Adventures of Mazie starring and Southern.
Speaker 4 (00:24):
You all remember met for Golden Mayer's famous Mazie Pictures.
Just a moment, you'll hear Mazie in radio, starring the
same glamorous star you all went to see and loved
on the screen. And Southern, but first you're announcer, and
(01:13):
now here's Anne Southern as Mazie.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Yep, I'm maze, like the man said Mazy Revere from Brooklyn.
I've done a lot of work in the theater, but
I keep giving it that because I'm really interested in
something steady, like eating. So I took a job as
a travel sales lady for a certain novelty company, and
after three days at it, I can see why they
call it a novelty company. If you sell something, it's
(01:41):
a novelty. And when I took this job, I was
supposed to be a house to house salesman, but they
didn't tell me the houses were twenty miles apart. And
I'm hungry too. I guess I'll just leave my trusty
old sample cases out here on the sidewalk and buy
myself something to eat in this little hamburger joints. H yes,
(02:02):
it's hotcakes and little sausages. Now good, Jimmy, Yes.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Miss, what can I do for you? Thanks?
Speaker 2 (02:10):
I didn't think you noticed me. How much for hotcakes
and sausages? My little man?
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Have thirty five cents?
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Very reasonable?
Speaker 1 (02:18):
Very The toast is free?
Speaker 5 (02:20):
Are good?
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Then that's for me?
Speaker 1 (02:22):
Oh? Miss, the toast is free only if you take
the breakfast.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
Kind of thought there was a catch to it. I'll
take a cup of coffee.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Sure, I'm sorry, Miss, I spilled some of the coffee
into your sausage.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Oh good, I'm a little too tired to do it
by myself.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
Oh do you like drinking it from a saucer too?
Speaker 2 (02:41):
Well, not ordinarily, sonny, but that's the only way I
can drink it and keep an eye on my sample
cases out on the sidewalk at the same time.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Did you say sample cases? Uh?
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Huh. I'm a traveling sales lady.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Oh, I say, what are you selling?
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Nothing?
Speaker 1 (02:56):
You're selling nothing.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
Folks in this part of the country sure have a
lot of sales resistance.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Yeah. Here, I'll give you some more coffee. Miss. You
ain't from these parts.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Are you no Brooklyn, New York?
Speaker 1 (03:10):
Oh, gosh, New York. I heard a lot about New York.
What's it really like?
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Like nothing you've ever seen.
Speaker 1 (03:16):
Mister Johnny, Miss Johnny Clark.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Oh, well I made you with the Hi Hi.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
And Johnny, yesmazing.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
I think maybe you'd better stop pouring the coffee. A
counter starting to float.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
Oh, oh, I'm sorry. I guess I was just carried away.
Kind of Gosh, give me the big city anytime. There's
nothing to do in these hittowns. No, look at this place.
It's practically a cemetery with lights, nothing to do, no
place to go, and all those crazy laws.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Crazy laws.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Yeah, why what are the city?
Speaker 2 (03:53):
Father is against here? Johnny?
Speaker 1 (03:55):
You name it and they're against it. We got all
kinds of crazy laws, Ohio, officer rally.
Speaker 6 (04:01):
Those suitcases are those out on the sidewalk.
Speaker 5 (04:04):
There's one of them now?
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Oh for those things are mine, Officer. I left them
out in the sidewalk while I came in for a
type of cost.
Speaker 6 (04:10):
Well, you should have taken them in with you.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
Oh that's Jilly, And of my suitcases drink coffee. Keeps
them up at night.
Speaker 6 (04:18):
Oh, one of them, witty type persons.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Let me handle this, Johnny. What's wrong with leaving my
stuff out on the curse?
Speaker 6 (04:26):
It's section two five to two in the penal Code
of this township. That's what's wrong. That'll be five dollars,
miss Fie.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
That's the part of my stuff on your crummy sidewalk.
Speaker 6 (04:35):
Mazy, please, that'll be ten dollars, miss ten dollars.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Don't tell me I got my junk parked on both sides.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Of the street.
Speaker 6 (04:42):
You just broke City Ordnance number three four eight, whereby
it's a misdemeanor by word or action to the ride
city property, and that sidewalk is city property.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Officer, if you got rocks in your head, the Ordnance
five to two nine states that insulting an officer of
the law in the pursuit his duty is punishable by
a fine of five dollars. Well, I'll take ten bucks
worth of that after Raley, I've met flat feet in
my time, but this is the first time I met
one who was flat at both and mazy please, And
if you think you can pull that stuff on me,
(05:13):
you ought to have your brain examined by a doctor.
And if he finds a brain, somebody ought to have
the doctor examined.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Oh, mazy, you're.
Speaker 6 (05:20):
Only making a worse here's your summons, miss be a
judge Murdox Court tomorrow morning at ten with fifty dollars.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
Oh, this is the most ridiculous fifty dollars.
Speaker 6 (05:30):
According to Ordnance eight three three, it's a misdemeanor to
talk in an unnecessarily loud voice before nine am.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
A good day, is no officer.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Yeah, I haven't got the money.
Speaker 7 (05:42):
It's too bad. Mess.
Speaker 6 (05:44):
You're not going to like our jails, jail.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
Johnny with the I mean, do you think I'm sorry, Mazie.
Anything I can do?
Speaker 2 (05:56):
Yeah, ask your chef to bake me a cake for
the file in it.
Speaker 7 (06:11):
Come out.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
Oh, I'm looking for Peter Rockford, the lawyer.
Speaker 7 (06:17):
Peter the lawyer.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Miss er, see, I start of expected to know the man.
You're young.
Speaker 7 (06:26):
Well, it isn't against the law to be young, is that?
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Well, it might be everything else in this town seems
to be against the law. She just got a look
at what Officer Riley handed me.
Speaker 7 (06:37):
Looks like you had the book thrown, aren't you.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Yeah, I'm a regular one woman murder incorporated all by myself.
Mister Rockford, I need advice and I needed that.
Speaker 7 (06:46):
Well, I suggest you pay the fine.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
I don't need it that bad. Look do you tell
all your clients to go ahead and pay the fines
without fighting.
Speaker 7 (06:54):
The cave You don't understand less Revere.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
Oh, I think I do. You don't want to defend me.
I can't pay you.
Speaker 7 (07:01):
That's not true. It's well, my hands are tired to tongueing.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
You could tell that judge Murdoch where to get off
of those school ball laws. I want to go to
jail and be a market woman's salivety. You gotta do something,
mister Rockford.
Speaker 7 (07:13):
I'm afraid I can't. You broke city ordinances, laws that
are on the bucks.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
But they don't make sense. What's the terrible about parking
a couple of suitcases on the sidewalk?
Speaker 7 (07:22):
Well, it's still the law, and the local constabular enforces
that and other archaic ordinances whenever the city treasury gets
too low?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Why picking a portion of got me? Gosh? What am
I going to do?
Speaker 7 (07:35):
I wish I could think of something. Come on.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
High pee, ah, Hi, mzy.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Just call me public enemy number one.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Johnny Oh, can't do anything, huppy, Oh, I don't think
we can expect any mercy from Judge Murdoch. Oh see
that's an angle angle.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Yeah, after all, I'm a woman.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Oh Murdoch is about sixty oh too late.
Speaker 7 (08:00):
If I had the fifty bucks months for here, your
problem would be solved.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Well, thanks pecherial sweep. But strange enough, it's not me
I'm concerned about. It's you folks in this town. How
can you enjoy life here?
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Who enjoys it? Find town against the law, to talk loud,
against the law, to kiss a girl in public, against
the law.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
And even kiss a girl in public either.
Speaker 7 (08:22):
After the War of eighteen twelve, just before the soldiers
came home, they can't.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Kiss a girl, so one of the soldiers wanted to
come home.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Day.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
The newspaper should be interested in giving a lot of
space to fight in a law like that. People are
always interested in kissing.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
I know I would be. If they made it less expensive, well, it.
Speaker 7 (08:42):
Might help them bring to the other ridiculous outmoded by laws.
If a case like that was actually brought the court
and fought.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
Well, it shouldn't be too hard to find two people
in town that wouldn't mind kissing each other in public.
Speaker 7 (08:54):
I mean a man and a woman.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
That's the loss on they of nature. And believe me,
that's one law that makes sense.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
Yeah, but who we get? Folks in this town don't
care much for that kind of publicity.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
Oh what about you, Johnny? You got a girl, haven't you?
Speaker 5 (09:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (09:09):
I got a girl, but kissing her is out who
we're not married yet? How about you, Pete? Me? Yeah?
Why not?
Speaker 2 (09:17):
You're tall and handsome, fairly black hair, and cute as
dimple shocks.
Speaker 7 (09:23):
I mean you think a girl would want to kiss me?
Speaker 2 (09:27):
Well, it could be, honey, could be.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
Yeah. What do you say, Pete? Are you willing to
play the party the first part?
Speaker 7 (09:34):
Right? I guess so. But I don't need a girl
to kiss? Who we ask?
Speaker 2 (09:40):
Oh, Pete, I don't have anything specially to do right now?
Speaker 7 (09:43):
Oh Mazie, no you sending you to shop around? You
couldn't know any of the girls in town.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
No, I couldn't could have.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
Let's see, now there's Rita Howard. Yeah. The fellows all
say that she's you know, she's.
Speaker 7 (09:58):
Got those protruding teeth, and every other one is missing
kissing hers like kissing a picket fence.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
Well, I got all my teeth.
Speaker 7 (10:05):
Uh, Saint Johnny. That Charlotte Phillips isn't a bad looking dish.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
Yeah, but her brother is six feet eight.
Speaker 2 (10:12):
I ain't got a brother.
Speaker 7 (10:14):
We need a girl who doesn't talk much, don't we
mazy yep? See, now who can we get?
Speaker 2 (10:21):
Don't ask me, chum, I gave up long ago.
Speaker 7 (10:23):
Okay, I've got it.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Yeah, mazy me, that's a wonderful idea. How did you
ever think of it?
Speaker 7 (10:31):
Swill?
Speaker 1 (10:32):
Then it's set?
Speaker 7 (10:33):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Well, here we go again. Why not?
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Yeah? Why can't you kiss Mazie? Yeah? Why not?
Speaker 7 (10:40):
Well, you're hiring me as you're a lawyer and not
my boss?
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Or what do you want to raise?
Speaker 7 (10:45):
No, it's just that. Wow, business and romance don't go together.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
No, have you ever been a private secretary?
Speaker 7 (10:53):
Let's see. If we're going to get ourselves arrested for
kissing in a public place, we've got to pick out
one that's real public.
Speaker 2 (10:59):
Well, then let's go to the park.
Speaker 7 (11:01):
A cop only goes through the park every two hours.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
Good, they will have lots of time to practice.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
The adventures of Mazie Starring and Southern will continue in
just a moment, all back too amazing.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Oh, gosh, Peter, it's beautiful here in the park, the
full moonshine and everything covered with snow. The chair is romantic, Pete.
I said, it certainly is romantic, Pete.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
I'm talking.
Speaker 2 (12:18):
Do you take off your ear mops? Okay, the good
see your chair is romantic here, Peter, let's say something
that's beautiful, darling sheer poetry.
Speaker 7 (12:33):
I'm sorry, Mazie, but I'm cold.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
But it'll get warmer Son much warmer, Johnny.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
You go find a cop, and I'd rather stay here
and watch. I got a lot to learn.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
You ain't the only one. Go find it's a nice cop, Johnny.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Okay, I'll warn you when he's coming. I'll whistle like this, Pete,
and if everything's all right, you whistle back.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
If everything's already, won't be able to whistle back.
Speaker 1 (12:55):
Oh oh yeah, I keep forgetting.
Speaker 7 (12:58):
Well, I'll go smell and don't be long, Johnny.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Look, Peter, we got to make this kissing business look
like the real thing is. We want the cop to
arrest us. You know, first we got to get.
Speaker 7 (13:09):
In the mood. Look amazing. We're just doing this thing
for the people.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Well, I'm people, and I like a little preliminaries before
the main event.
Speaker 7 (13:16):
Okay, okay, what do you want me to do?
Speaker 2 (13:20):
Well, suppose you stop flapping your arms around yourself and
flapping around me.
Speaker 7 (13:24):
Amazing, I'm just flapping my arms. I keep my blood circulating.
Speaker 2 (13:27):
What blood? Take me in your arms?
Speaker 1 (13:30):
Pete?
Speaker 7 (13:31):
Okay, there, satisfied.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
Yeah, thrilled.
Speaker 5 (13:37):
Oh what.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
Let's talk about?
Speaker 2 (13:41):
What about the situation in Indo China? That's what.
Speaker 7 (13:46):
Well. According to the latest reports, Indo China expects its government.
Speaker 1 (13:50):
To shut up already.
Speaker 7 (13:52):
I thought you wanted me to talk.
Speaker 2 (13:53):
Yeah, but about something.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
Mutual interest me?
Speaker 7 (13:56):
Oh what shall I say?
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Anything? It pops in your mind like a mazy you're beautiful,
adorable and stuff like that.
Speaker 7 (14:05):
Okay, crazy, you're beautiful adorable. Yeah, go on, stuff like that.
Oh fine, Mazie, I mean you are beautiful adorable.
Speaker 2 (14:16):
Oh go on.
Speaker 1 (14:18):
He kn'ts a cop. That's why is he looking the
other way.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
But don't bother him. He's probably tired.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
He's looking this way. Now you better kiss her, Pete.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
Oh you hear what the fellow said, Peter.
Speaker 7 (14:27):
That's crazy. Come closer, Pete.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
That is my breath away.
Speaker 7 (14:34):
Hey, what's coming off here?
Speaker 2 (14:36):
My lipstick, Officer, this man kissed me?
Speaker 6 (14:38):
Oh he did?
Speaker 1 (14:40):
Well?
Speaker 7 (14:40):
How do you like that?
Speaker 2 (14:42):
Very much?
Speaker 1 (14:43):
Too?
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Well? Opposite? What are you gonna do about it?
Speaker 4 (14:45):
What am I gonna do about it?
Speaker 7 (14:47):
What are you gonna do about it? I'm gonna congratulate you.
She's a very pretty girl.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
Ah do you really think so, officer? I mean, what
about the law?
Speaker 7 (14:56):
The law? What law?
Speaker 1 (14:59):
He kissed me again? That law? Oh you mean?
Speaker 8 (15:02):
Statuto three four five two nine, Section B is amended,
whereby it shall be deemed unlawful for two persons of
opposite sexes to kiss, embrace, to give undue evidence of
affection on the streets, in the parks, or any public
place gathering.
Speaker 7 (15:13):
Yeah, that's it. I don't believe in it.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
You do, don't you?
Speaker 2 (15:17):
But you gotta believe in it?
Speaker 7 (15:18):
Who says I do? I don't so do?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Why? Yeah? You better arrest them off? So before I
call a cop, you keep out of this fat head.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Don't you dare call him a fat head? You you fat.
Speaker 8 (15:30):
Haird oh castle on this or I'll haul you in
and find you ten dollars for contempt of an officer.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Ten dollars. But I got more contempt for you than that.
Speaker 7 (15:39):
Oh well that cuts it.
Speaker 8 (15:41):
I'm taking you in.
Speaker 7 (15:42):
Come on, take your hands off her officer. Oh who,
wise guy? Or just a couple of law abiding citizens.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Who insists on the protection promised us in the constitution
to be arrested, park isn't?
Speaker 8 (15:53):
Yeah, okay, I'm arresting you for kissing last at last
or sofa cree aating a disturbance, being a public nuisance,
holding a public meeting after c a few hours, inciting
a riot, and walking on the grass.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
Walking on the grass.
Speaker 7 (16:09):
It's covered with six inches of snow, but under the
snow is grass, and you're walking on it.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Come on, both of.
Speaker 2 (16:15):
You, Oh Pete, we should have quit when we were.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Ahead in here. Record.
Speaker 7 (16:29):
You only got two minutes to talk to thanks mister Taylor.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Oh hello, Peter, are you free already?
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Look?
Speaker 7 (16:35):
Ma see they only gave me two minutes.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Well that ain't much of a sentence. I'll probably get
two years.
Speaker 7 (16:40):
I mean two minutes to talk to you, So I'll
have to talk first. Yeah, our case comes up this
afternoon before the top all Judge Murdoch, and I think
we can beat the rappith you do exactly as I
tell you.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
Oh sure, Peter, what do you want me to do.
Speaker 7 (16:51):
I'll let me handle the whole thing. You know absolutely nothing.
Speaker 1 (16:54):
You ain't kidna mission today I proved it.
Speaker 7 (16:57):
I mean, when we come before the judge, let me
do all the talking. Times are folks, okay? And I
remember amazing. Not a word from you.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
I remember, Sam Pete. And when we come to trial.
You won't be soort me because I got you into
this mess? Will you? You won't sell me down the river?
Speaker 1 (17:13):
Zy.
Speaker 7 (17:13):
I'll be your hanged if I will.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
But that judge that's possible too.
Speaker 7 (17:28):
You got another visit in Miss Revere.
Speaker 6 (17:30):
You want to see him?
Speaker 1 (17:32):
And Miss Revere, I said, do you want to see him?
Why don't you answer?
Speaker 2 (17:36):
My lawyer said, I'm not supposed to talk.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
It's me mzy ah. Come in, Johnny, thanks.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
And leave the jail door open. Guard it's stuffy in here.
Speaker 6 (17:45):
Oh sure, miss anything you say? No, you don't two minutes, Sonny, okay, jeez, nice.
Speaker 2 (17:54):
Me to come and talk to me, Johnny. I'm tired
of ask myself why I got into this mess. I
guess it's stupid.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
Don't take it too hard, Mayzee. After all, stone walls
do not a prison, make no.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
Well, you could have fooled me.
Speaker 1 (18:08):
Gee, this is an awful Messu're in maze. What are
you gonna do?
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Five years? Ten years? It all depends on Peter and
whether the judge can be made to realize how stupid
those outmoded laws are.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
Stupid is right now? I've been reading up on some
of the other laws, and they got some real comical
ones here. Yeah, but did you know that this town
still has a law on the books that goes back
to the Civil War. No, yeah, says quote, no resident
of this township shall harbor or give refuge to a
Southerner on penalty of life, imprisonment or death.
Speaker 7 (18:42):
Unquote.
Speaker 1 (18:43):
Oh no, Can you imagine what happened if they tried
to afford that law to day?
Speaker 2 (18:50):
Hey, Johnny, that's it.
Speaker 1 (18:52):
Maybe I said something could be Johnny.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
This judge Murdoch, is he an old sixty year a
young sixty.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
Well, I've noticed the mine and the local bells on
Windy Corners, but I never heard of the old guy
making an actual pass.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
Oh, then he's still susceptible. Look, Johnny, my little plan
might not be as legal as Pete's, but it stands
a better chance of working. Johnny you're my friend, aren't.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
You till the end?
Speaker 2 (19:19):
For what I want you to do? Meyland's in jail.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
That's the end. So Johnny, you gotta do it now.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
Listen after I.
Speaker 1 (19:35):
Hey or is now in session? Is I'm a judge,
Elish jocksiding, Peter, I gotta tell you something you remember.
Speaker 7 (19:44):
Don't say anything. Leave it all to me, Pete.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
I found a lat pastor in the Civil War that
was talking amongst the defendants.
Speaker 9 (19:51):
What's the first case, clerk, City of Cornwall versus Peter
Rockford and Mazie Revere.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Here are all the charges, youranam.
Speaker 9 (20:00):
A few ordinance is broken, about three hundred dollars worth.
I figure, nice work, Officer Jenkins.
Speaker 1 (20:06):
Thanks Uncle Elias, Peter.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
I'm crazy.
Speaker 7 (20:09):
I'll handle everything, your honor.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
I can explain.
Speaker 7 (20:12):
The charge is listed in the complaint. The whole thing
was the result of our unified efforts to make a
test case of that ridiculous kissing and public law so
that all the outmoded city statutes still in existence would
be repeated.
Speaker 9 (20:25):
Oh you did, eh, Miss Revere? Do you have any
testimony to give this court? Or I find you both
your day, your honor, what I'm telling you is the truth.
Miss Revere can bear me out? Oh she can, eh,
Miss Revere, you know the charge is brought against you.
Speaker 5 (20:40):
Tell me are you innocent?
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Eh? Well?
Speaker 2 (20:43):
None tired, Judge Honey, I know a little about the birds.
Speaker 7 (20:47):
Indeed, yes, and I insist crazy. What's come over you?
Speaker 5 (20:51):
You're you're from the south, Miss Revere?
Speaker 2 (20:56):
Show I am judge sugar. I'm just a little old
cot way down young and little old New yall Leans.
Speaker 5 (21:04):
Why tell me, nie child, I mean revered? What is
this man to you?
Speaker 2 (21:12):
He by your ana until he came over to me
in the park and tried to kiss me. I declare,
I never saw him before my whole life. What a
mazy fact that I couldn't blame him for getting flirty
with me. Judge Hanney, I guess are you young?
Speaker 3 (21:28):
And I lie young?
Speaker 5 (21:31):
I'm not that young, sugar, I mean girly.
Speaker 7 (21:35):
Amaze, this has gone too far. I've heard enough all.
Speaker 9 (21:38):
I Peter Rockford, I find you guilty of molesting this
innocent girl in the public park. Oh fine, yes, two
hundred dollars and six months in jail.
Speaker 7 (21:46):
Take him away off, Come on, jump amazing, I'll get
you for this.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Oh did you hear that, Elae, honey, I'm scared, shown
up scared.
Speaker 5 (21:55):
Now, don't you were? Imusy you will be perfectly safe
with that young measure behind the bus.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Well, I know, judge, you watch it, but I've still
got about now to my sailly old train leaves, and
I'm I'm scared of being all along in your city.
Is there a place where poor helpless but awful, friendly
little girl like myself and started to kill a little
time till my train comes in?
Speaker 5 (22:20):
Yea, well, my house is just down the street. If
you'd like to, will spend your last hour in town
with me?
Speaker 2 (22:31):
Will you all handsome? Coax me? Will talk me into it?
Shall we go? You know, Eli, honey, it sure has
(22:52):
been pleasant sitting with you here and this your partly
expression love scene.
Speaker 5 (22:58):
Yes, my dear, but you still seem to be afraid
of well something. You keep looking out the windows if
you were expecting somebody.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
Oh, well, that's just for to have it, sugar. When
I lived on my grandpappy plantation, I always used to
look out the wind that had the tobacco trees.
Speaker 5 (23:16):
Tobacco trees where I come from.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
The tobacco grows real talll come in Johnny say.
Speaker 5 (23:24):
How do you know who's out there just to.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
Wow gay it?
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Oh huh, well, well I find you two together just
as I thought.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
By Judge honey, what did this perfect strange mean by that?
Speaker 9 (23:38):
Yes, young man, do you realize you're breaking the law
by bursting in air?
Speaker 1 (23:42):
On the contrary, Judge murdoct as you who are breaking
the law? Yes, I mean, yeah, yeah, breaking the law?
Speaker 7 (23:49):
What law?
Speaker 1 (23:50):
A certain statue passed in eighteen sixty three whereby it
is unlawful to give refuge or harbor a Southerner, of
which this young lady is undoubtedly of your Southerner?
Speaker 2 (24:00):
You all why that all is ridiculous?
Speaker 1 (24:03):
All ain't and all judge all but the fat laws
out and mooded?
Speaker 5 (24:07):
Were they just forgot to repeal it?
Speaker 1 (24:09):
However, it is still a law punishable by life, imprisonment,
death or.
Speaker 2 (24:14):
Bull Oh we gotta do something life, honey. If I
get myself involve with the guns like this? What were
my family is laying to think?
Speaker 5 (24:23):
Whether I thought you came from New Orleans?
Speaker 2 (24:26):
Well, we move around a lot, young man. Couldn't we
all come to some kind of agreement to hush this
disgraceful thing? Else?
Speaker 7 (24:34):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (24:34):
Yes, I don't do anything.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
Oh, you're real good. Then maybe you all would forget
about those other silly, out of date laws like kissing
in public and free anybody under rest for violating saying
like that Peter Rockford.
Speaker 9 (24:51):
Ma h all right, huh, I agree to the terms,
Rockford will go free, and then I'll see to it
that tho stupid laws or repeal.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
Good Oh, judge, I insist that you put this verbal
agreement in writing. Here it has already drawn up.
Speaker 5 (25:08):
Well, you were pretty sure of yourself, weren't you, young man.
Speaker 2 (25:11):
Yeah, honey, we shore work, I mean we show was
cozy in here until this gang rapped signed handy so
often be alone again?
Speaker 1 (25:24):
Load sure.
Speaker 5 (25:28):
Satisfied? Now? Uh huh?
Speaker 2 (25:31):
Now, Johnny, go get Pete out of the clan.
Speaker 9 (25:33):
Yes, go get Hey, you just lost your Southern accent.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
Goodnight. Well it may be a little late, drool boy,
but I just decided to join the union.
Speaker 4 (25:54):
At the moment, we shall return to the adventures of Maizie.
(26:38):
Now once again, here's Macie.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
Well, that little caper wound up on the plus side
for humanity. Me and my sample cases are on our
merry way unto the light blue yonder. I sure hated
to say about it, Johnny, especially Peter. After all, something
might have come from our mutual attraction. The struggling young
lawyer immediate have something in common. We both were broke. Well,
(27:04):
little Maze, you'll just struggle along until mister Wright comes along. Yes,
when I finally put my finger in a wedding ring,
I'm gonna make real sure I ain't put my foot
in it too. Well, good go and see. Be careful.
Speaker 4 (27:26):
You just heard. The Adventures of Mazie, starring and Southern Mazie,
was written by Arthur Phillips. Original music was composed and
conducted by Harry Zimmerman. Supporting cast included Sidney Miller, Louis
Jean Heights, Earl Ross, Peter Leeds, Frank Nelson, and James Eagle.
Speaker 3 (27:48):
Jack McCoy speaking
Speaker 1 (28:03):
Are m
I have, babe.
Speaker 2 (00:06):
See how about a little?
Speaker 1 (00:07):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (00:08):
Does that answer your question? Buddy?
Speaker 3 (00:14):
The Adventures of Mazie starring and Southern.
Speaker 4 (00:24):
You all remember met for Golden Mayer's famous Mazie Pictures.
Just a moment, you'll hear Mazie in radio, starring the
same glamorous star you all went to see and loved
on the screen. And Southern, but first you're announcer, and
(01:13):
now here's Anne Southern as Mazie.
Speaker 2 (01:18):
Yep, I'm maze, like the man said Mazy Revere from Brooklyn.
I've done a lot of work in the theater, but
I keep giving it that because I'm really interested in
something steady, like eating. So I took a job as
a travel sales lady for a certain novelty company, and
after three days at it, I can see why they
call it a novelty company. If you sell something, it's
(01:41):
a novelty. And when I took this job, I was
supposed to be a house to house salesman, but they
didn't tell me the houses were twenty miles apart. And
I'm hungry too. I guess I'll just leave my trusty
old sample cases out here on the sidewalk and buy
myself something to eat in this little hamburger joints. H yes,
(02:02):
it's hotcakes and little sausages. Now good, Jimmy, Yes.
Speaker 1 (02:05):
Miss, what can I do for you? Thanks?
Speaker 2 (02:10):
I didn't think you noticed me. How much for hotcakes
and sausages? My little man?
Speaker 1 (02:14):
Have thirty five cents?
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Very reasonable?
Speaker 1 (02:18):
Very The toast is free?
Speaker 5 (02:20):
Are good?
Speaker 2 (02:20):
Then that's for me?
Speaker 1 (02:22):
Oh? Miss, the toast is free only if you take
the breakfast.
Speaker 2 (02:26):
Kind of thought there was a catch to it. I'll
take a cup of coffee.
Speaker 1 (02:30):
Sure, I'm sorry, Miss, I spilled some of the coffee
into your sausage.
Speaker 2 (02:35):
Oh good, I'm a little too tired to do it
by myself.
Speaker 1 (02:39):
Oh do you like drinking it from a saucer too?
Speaker 2 (02:41):
Well, not ordinarily, sonny, but that's the only way I
can drink it and keep an eye on my sample
cases out on the sidewalk at the same time.
Speaker 1 (02:48):
Did you say sample cases? Uh?
Speaker 2 (02:50):
Huh. I'm a traveling sales lady.
Speaker 1 (02:53):
Oh, I say, what are you selling?
Speaker 2 (02:55):
Nothing?
Speaker 1 (02:56):
You're selling nothing.
Speaker 2 (02:58):
Folks in this part of the country sure have a
lot of sales resistance.
Speaker 1 (03:01):
Yeah. Here, I'll give you some more coffee. Miss. You
ain't from these parts.
Speaker 2 (03:07):
Are you no Brooklyn, New York?
Speaker 1 (03:10):
Oh, gosh, New York. I heard a lot about New York.
What's it really like?
Speaker 2 (03:15):
Like nothing you've ever seen.
Speaker 1 (03:16):
Mister Johnny, Miss Johnny Clark.
Speaker 2 (03:19):
Oh, well I made you with the Hi Hi.
Speaker 1 (03:23):
And Johnny, yesmazing.
Speaker 2 (03:26):
I think maybe you'd better stop pouring the coffee. A
counter starting to float.
Speaker 1 (03:30):
Oh, oh, I'm sorry. I guess I was just carried away.
Kind of Gosh, give me the big city anytime. There's
nothing to do in these hittowns. No, look at this place.
It's practically a cemetery with lights, nothing to do, no
place to go, and all those crazy laws.
Speaker 2 (03:51):
Crazy laws.
Speaker 1 (03:51):
Yeah, why what are the city?
Speaker 2 (03:53):
Father is against here? Johnny?
Speaker 1 (03:55):
You name it and they're against it. We got all
kinds of crazy laws, Ohio, officer rally.
Speaker 6 (04:01):
Those suitcases are those out on the sidewalk.
Speaker 5 (04:04):
There's one of them now?
Speaker 2 (04:05):
Oh for those things are mine, Officer. I left them
out in the sidewalk while I came in for a
type of cost.
Speaker 6 (04:10):
Well, you should have taken them in with you.
Speaker 2 (04:13):
Oh that's Jilly, And of my suitcases drink coffee. Keeps
them up at night.
Speaker 6 (04:18):
Oh, one of them, witty type persons.
Speaker 2 (04:22):
Let me handle this, Johnny. What's wrong with leaving my
stuff out on the curse?
Speaker 6 (04:26):
It's section two five to two in the penal Code
of this township. That's what's wrong. That'll be five dollars,
miss Fie.
Speaker 2 (04:32):
That's the part of my stuff on your crummy sidewalk.
Speaker 6 (04:35):
Mazy, please, that'll be ten dollars, miss ten dollars.
Speaker 2 (04:39):
Don't tell me I got my junk parked on both sides.
Speaker 1 (04:42):
Of the street.
Speaker 6 (04:42):
You just broke City Ordnance number three four eight, whereby
it's a misdemeanor by word or action to the ride
city property, and that sidewalk is city property.
Speaker 2 (04:52):
Officer, if you got rocks in your head, the Ordnance
five to two nine states that insulting an officer of
the law in the pursuit his duty is punishable by
a fine of five dollars. Well, I'll take ten bucks
worth of that after Raley, I've met flat feet in
my time, but this is the first time I met
one who was flat at both and mazy please, And
if you think you can pull that stuff on me,
(05:13):
you ought to have your brain examined by a doctor.
And if he finds a brain, somebody ought to have
the doctor examined.
Speaker 1 (05:19):
Oh, mazy, you're.
Speaker 6 (05:20):
Only making a worse here's your summons, miss be a
judge Murdox Court tomorrow morning at ten with fifty dollars.
Speaker 2 (05:26):
Oh, this is the most ridiculous fifty dollars.
Speaker 6 (05:30):
According to Ordnance eight three three, it's a misdemeanor to
talk in an unnecessarily loud voice before nine am.
Speaker 1 (05:37):
A good day, is no officer.
Speaker 2 (05:40):
Yeah, I haven't got the money.
Speaker 7 (05:42):
It's too bad. Mess.
Speaker 6 (05:44):
You're not going to like our jails, jail.
Speaker 1 (05:49):
Johnny with the I mean, do you think I'm sorry, Mazie.
Anything I can do?
Speaker 2 (05:56):
Yeah, ask your chef to bake me a cake for
the file in it.
Speaker 7 (06:11):
Come out.
Speaker 2 (06:13):
Oh, I'm looking for Peter Rockford, the lawyer.
Speaker 7 (06:17):
Peter the lawyer.
Speaker 2 (06:18):
Miss er, see, I start of expected to know the man.
You're young.
Speaker 7 (06:26):
Well, it isn't against the law to be young, is that?
Speaker 2 (06:29):
Well, it might be everything else in this town seems
to be against the law. She just got a look
at what Officer Riley handed me.
Speaker 7 (06:37):
Looks like you had the book thrown, aren't you.
Speaker 2 (06:39):
Yeah, I'm a regular one woman murder incorporated all by myself.
Mister Rockford, I need advice and I needed that.
Speaker 7 (06:46):
Well, I suggest you pay the fine.
Speaker 2 (06:49):
I don't need it that bad. Look do you tell
all your clients to go ahead and pay the fines
without fighting.
Speaker 7 (06:54):
The cave You don't understand less Revere.
Speaker 2 (06:57):
Oh, I think I do. You don't want to defend me.
I can't pay you.
Speaker 7 (07:01):
That's not true. It's well, my hands are tired to tongueing.
Speaker 2 (07:05):
You could tell that judge Murdoch where to get off
of those school ball laws. I want to go to
jail and be a market woman's salivety. You gotta do something,
mister Rockford.
Speaker 7 (07:13):
I'm afraid I can't. You broke city ordinances, laws that
are on the bucks.
Speaker 2 (07:17):
But they don't make sense. What's the terrible about parking
a couple of suitcases on the sidewalk?
Speaker 7 (07:22):
Well, it's still the law, and the local constabular enforces
that and other archaic ordinances whenever the city treasury gets
too low?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
Why picking a portion of got me? Gosh? What am
I going to do?
Speaker 7 (07:35):
I wish I could think of something. Come on.
Speaker 1 (07:40):
High pee, ah, Hi, mzy.
Speaker 2 (07:42):
Just call me public enemy number one.
Speaker 1 (07:44):
Johnny Oh, can't do anything, huppy, Oh, I don't think
we can expect any mercy from Judge Murdoch. Oh see
that's an angle angle.
Speaker 2 (07:54):
Yeah, after all, I'm a woman.
Speaker 1 (07:56):
Oh Murdoch is about sixty oh too late.
Speaker 7 (08:00):
If I had the fifty bucks months for here, your
problem would be solved.
Speaker 2 (08:03):
Well, thanks pecherial sweep. But strange enough, it's not me
I'm concerned about. It's you folks in this town. How
can you enjoy life here?
Speaker 1 (08:12):
Who enjoys it? Find town against the law, to talk loud,
against the law, to kiss a girl in public, against
the law.
Speaker 2 (08:19):
And even kiss a girl in public either.
Speaker 7 (08:22):
After the War of eighteen twelve, just before the soldiers
came home, they can't.
Speaker 2 (08:26):
Kiss a girl, so one of the soldiers wanted to
come home.
Speaker 1 (08:30):
Day.
Speaker 2 (08:31):
The newspaper should be interested in giving a lot of
space to fight in a law like that. People are
always interested in kissing.
Speaker 1 (08:38):
I know I would be. If they made it less expensive, well, it.
Speaker 7 (08:42):
Might help them bring to the other ridiculous outmoded by laws.
If a case like that was actually brought the court
and fought.
Speaker 2 (08:49):
Well, it shouldn't be too hard to find two people
in town that wouldn't mind kissing each other in public.
Speaker 7 (08:54):
I mean a man and a woman.
Speaker 2 (08:56):
That's the loss on they of nature. And believe me,
that's one law that makes sense.
Speaker 1 (09:01):
Yeah, but who we get? Folks in this town don't
care much for that kind of publicity.
Speaker 2 (09:05):
Oh what about you, Johnny? You got a girl, haven't you?
Speaker 5 (09:09):
Yeah?
Speaker 1 (09:09):
I got a girl, but kissing her is out who
we're not married yet? How about you, Pete? Me? Yeah?
Why not?
Speaker 2 (09:17):
You're tall and handsome, fairly black hair, and cute as
dimple shocks.
Speaker 7 (09:23):
I mean you think a girl would want to kiss me?
Speaker 2 (09:27):
Well, it could be, honey, could be.
Speaker 1 (09:30):
Yeah. What do you say, Pete? Are you willing to
play the party the first part?
Speaker 7 (09:34):
Right? I guess so. But I don't need a girl
to kiss? Who we ask?
Speaker 2 (09:40):
Oh, Pete, I don't have anything specially to do right now?
Speaker 7 (09:43):
Oh Mazie, no you sending you to shop around? You
couldn't know any of the girls in town.
Speaker 2 (09:49):
No, I couldn't could have.
Speaker 1 (09:50):
Let's see, now there's Rita Howard. Yeah. The fellows all
say that she's you know, she's.
Speaker 7 (09:58):
Got those protruding teeth, and every other one is missing
kissing hers like kissing a picket fence.
Speaker 2 (10:03):
Well, I got all my teeth.
Speaker 7 (10:05):
Uh, Saint Johnny. That Charlotte Phillips isn't a bad looking dish.
Speaker 1 (10:10):
Yeah, but her brother is six feet eight.
Speaker 2 (10:12):
I ain't got a brother.
Speaker 7 (10:14):
We need a girl who doesn't talk much, don't we
mazy yep? See, now who can we get?
Speaker 2 (10:21):
Don't ask me, chum, I gave up long ago.
Speaker 7 (10:23):
Okay, I've got it.
Speaker 2 (10:25):
Yeah, mazy me, that's a wonderful idea. How did you
ever think of it?
Speaker 7 (10:31):
Swill?
Speaker 1 (10:32):
Then it's set?
Speaker 7 (10:33):
I don't know.
Speaker 2 (10:35):
Well, here we go again. Why not?
Speaker 1 (10:37):
Yeah? Why can't you kiss Mazie? Yeah? Why not?
Speaker 7 (10:40):
Well, you're hiring me as you're a lawyer and not
my boss?
Speaker 2 (10:44):
Or what do you want to raise?
Speaker 7 (10:45):
No, it's just that. Wow, business and romance don't go together.
Speaker 2 (10:49):
No, have you ever been a private secretary?
Speaker 7 (10:53):
Let's see. If we're going to get ourselves arrested for
kissing in a public place, we've got to pick out
one that's real public.
Speaker 2 (10:59):
Well, then let's go to the park.
Speaker 7 (11:01):
A cop only goes through the park every two hours.
Speaker 2 (11:03):
Good, they will have lots of time to practice.
Speaker 4 (11:16):
The adventures of Mazie Starring and Southern will continue in
just a moment, all back too amazing.
Speaker 2 (12:05):
Oh, gosh, Peter, it's beautiful here in the park, the
full moonshine and everything covered with snow. The chair is romantic, Pete.
I said, it certainly is romantic, Pete.
Speaker 1 (12:18):
I'm talking.
Speaker 2 (12:18):
Do you take off your ear mops? Okay, the good
see your chair is romantic here, Peter, let's say something
that's beautiful, darling sheer poetry.
Speaker 7 (12:33):
I'm sorry, Mazie, but I'm cold.
Speaker 2 (12:35):
But it'll get warmer Son much warmer, Johnny.
Speaker 1 (12:38):
You go find a cop, and I'd rather stay here
and watch. I got a lot to learn.
Speaker 2 (12:42):
You ain't the only one. Go find it's a nice cop, Johnny.
Speaker 1 (12:45):
Okay, I'll warn you when he's coming. I'll whistle like this, Pete,
and if everything's all right, you whistle back.
Speaker 2 (12:53):
If everything's already, won't be able to whistle back.
Speaker 1 (12:55):
Oh oh yeah, I keep forgetting.
Speaker 7 (12:58):
Well, I'll go smell and don't be long, Johnny.
Speaker 2 (13:02):
Look, Peter, we got to make this kissing business look
like the real thing is. We want the cop to
arrest us. You know, first we got to get.
Speaker 7 (13:09):
In the mood. Look amazing. We're just doing this thing
for the people.
Speaker 2 (13:12):
Well, I'm people, and I like a little preliminaries before
the main event.
Speaker 7 (13:16):
Okay, okay, what do you want me to do?
Speaker 2 (13:20):
Well, suppose you stop flapping your arms around yourself and
flapping around me.
Speaker 7 (13:24):
Amazing, I'm just flapping my arms. I keep my blood circulating.
Speaker 2 (13:27):
What blood? Take me in your arms?
Speaker 1 (13:30):
Pete?
Speaker 7 (13:31):
Okay, there, satisfied.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
Yeah, thrilled.
Speaker 5 (13:37):
Oh what.
Speaker 1 (13:40):
Let's talk about?
Speaker 2 (13:41):
What about the situation in Indo China? That's what.
Speaker 7 (13:46):
Well. According to the latest reports, Indo China expects its government.
Speaker 1 (13:50):
To shut up already.
Speaker 7 (13:52):
I thought you wanted me to talk.
Speaker 2 (13:53):
Yeah, but about something.
Speaker 1 (13:54):
Mutual interest me?
Speaker 7 (13:56):
Oh what shall I say?
Speaker 1 (13:58):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (13:59):
Anything? It pops in your mind like a mazy you're beautiful,
adorable and stuff like that.
Speaker 7 (14:05):
Okay, crazy, you're beautiful adorable. Yeah, go on, stuff like that.
Oh fine, Mazie, I mean you are beautiful adorable.
Speaker 2 (14:16):
Oh go on.
Speaker 1 (14:18):
He kn'ts a cop. That's why is he looking the
other way.
Speaker 2 (14:21):
But don't bother him. He's probably tired.
Speaker 1 (14:23):
He's looking this way. Now you better kiss her, Pete.
Speaker 2 (14:26):
Oh you hear what the fellow said, Peter.
Speaker 7 (14:27):
That's crazy. Come closer, Pete.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
That is my breath away.
Speaker 7 (14:34):
Hey, what's coming off here?
Speaker 2 (14:36):
My lipstick, Officer, this man kissed me?
Speaker 6 (14:38):
Oh he did?
Speaker 1 (14:40):
Well?
Speaker 7 (14:40):
How do you like that?
Speaker 2 (14:42):
Very much?
Speaker 1 (14:43):
Too?
Speaker 2 (14:43):
Well? Opposite? What are you gonna do about it?
Speaker 4 (14:45):
What am I gonna do about it?
Speaker 7 (14:47):
What are you gonna do about it? I'm gonna congratulate you.
She's a very pretty girl.
Speaker 2 (14:51):
Ah do you really think so, officer? I mean, what
about the law?
Speaker 7 (14:56):
The law? What law?
Speaker 1 (14:59):
He kissed me again? That law? Oh you mean?
Speaker 8 (15:02):
Statuto three four five two nine, Section B is amended,
whereby it shall be deemed unlawful for two persons of
opposite sexes to kiss, embrace, to give undue evidence of
affection on the streets, in the parks, or any public
place gathering.
Speaker 7 (15:13):
Yeah, that's it. I don't believe in it.
Speaker 1 (15:16):
You do, don't you?
Speaker 2 (15:17):
But you gotta believe in it?
Speaker 7 (15:18):
Who says I do? I don't so do?
Speaker 1 (15:20):
Why? Yeah? You better arrest them off? So before I
call a cop, you keep out of this fat head.
Speaker 2 (15:27):
Don't you dare call him a fat head? You you fat.
Speaker 8 (15:30):
Haird oh castle on this or I'll haul you in
and find you ten dollars for contempt of an officer.
Speaker 2 (15:36):
Ten dollars. But I got more contempt for you than that.
Speaker 7 (15:39):
Oh well that cuts it.
Speaker 8 (15:41):
I'm taking you in.
Speaker 7 (15:42):
Come on, take your hands off her officer. Oh who,
wise guy? Or just a couple of law abiding citizens.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
Who insists on the protection promised us in the constitution
to be arrested, park isn't?
Speaker 8 (15:53):
Yeah, okay, I'm arresting you for kissing last at last
or sofa cree aating a disturbance, being a public nuisance,
holding a public meeting after c a few hours, inciting
a riot, and walking on the grass.
Speaker 2 (16:08):
Walking on the grass.
Speaker 7 (16:09):
It's covered with six inches of snow, but under the
snow is grass, and you're walking on it.
Speaker 1 (16:14):
Come on, both of.
Speaker 2 (16:15):
You, Oh Pete, we should have quit when we were.
Speaker 1 (16:17):
Ahead in here. Record.
Speaker 7 (16:29):
You only got two minutes to talk to thanks mister Taylor.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Oh hello, Peter, are you free already?
Speaker 1 (16:34):
Look?
Speaker 7 (16:35):
Ma see they only gave me two minutes.
Speaker 2 (16:37):
Well that ain't much of a sentence. I'll probably get
two years.
Speaker 7 (16:40):
I mean two minutes to talk to you, So I'll
have to talk first. Yeah, our case comes up this
afternoon before the top all Judge Murdoch, and I think
we can beat the rappith you do exactly as I
tell you.
Speaker 2 (16:49):
Oh sure, Peter, what do you want me to do.
Speaker 7 (16:51):
I'll let me handle the whole thing. You know absolutely nothing.
Speaker 1 (16:54):
You ain't kidna mission today I proved it.
Speaker 7 (16:57):
I mean, when we come before the judge, let me
do all the talking. Times are folks, okay? And I
remember amazing. Not a word from you.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
I remember, Sam Pete. And when we come to trial.
You won't be soort me because I got you into
this mess? Will you? You won't sell me down the river?
Speaker 1 (17:13):
Zy.
Speaker 7 (17:13):
I'll be your hanged if I will.
Speaker 2 (17:15):
But that judge that's possible too.
Speaker 7 (17:28):
You got another visit in Miss Revere.
Speaker 6 (17:30):
You want to see him?
Speaker 1 (17:32):
And Miss Revere, I said, do you want to see him?
Why don't you answer?
Speaker 2 (17:36):
My lawyer said, I'm not supposed to talk.
Speaker 1 (17:38):
It's me mzy ah. Come in, Johnny, thanks.
Speaker 2 (17:42):
And leave the jail door open. Guard it's stuffy in here.
Speaker 6 (17:45):
Oh sure, miss anything you say? No, you don't two minutes, Sonny, okay, jeez, nice.
Speaker 2 (17:54):
Me to come and talk to me, Johnny. I'm tired
of ask myself why I got into this mess. I
guess it's stupid.
Speaker 1 (18:00):
Don't take it too hard, Mayzee. After all, stone walls
do not a prison, make no.
Speaker 2 (18:07):
Well, you could have fooled me.
Speaker 1 (18:08):
Gee, this is an awful Messu're in maze. What are
you gonna do?
Speaker 2 (18:12):
Five years? Ten years? It all depends on Peter and
whether the judge can be made to realize how stupid
those outmoded laws are.
Speaker 1 (18:20):
Stupid is right now? I've been reading up on some
of the other laws, and they got some real comical
ones here. Yeah, but did you know that this town
still has a law on the books that goes back
to the Civil War. No, yeah, says quote, no resident
of this township shall harbor or give refuge to a
Southerner on penalty of life, imprisonment or death.
Speaker 7 (18:42):
Unquote.
Speaker 1 (18:43):
Oh no, Can you imagine what happened if they tried
to afford that law to day?
Speaker 2 (18:50):
Hey, Johnny, that's it.
Speaker 1 (18:52):
Maybe I said something could be Johnny.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
This judge Murdoch, is he an old sixty year a
young sixty.
Speaker 1 (19:01):
Well, I've noticed the mine and the local bells on
Windy Corners, but I never heard of the old guy
making an actual pass.
Speaker 2 (19:07):
Oh, then he's still susceptible. Look, Johnny, my little plan
might not be as legal as Pete's, but it stands
a better chance of working. Johnny you're my friend, aren't.
Speaker 1 (19:18):
You till the end?
Speaker 2 (19:19):
For what I want you to do? Meyland's in jail.
Speaker 1 (19:21):
That's the end. So Johnny, you gotta do it now.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
Listen after I.
Speaker 1 (19:35):
Hey or is now in session? Is I'm a judge,
Elish jocksiding, Peter, I gotta tell you something you remember.
Speaker 7 (19:44):
Don't say anything. Leave it all to me, Pete.
Speaker 1 (19:46):
I found a lat pastor in the Civil War that
was talking amongst the defendants.
Speaker 9 (19:51):
What's the first case, clerk, City of Cornwall versus Peter
Rockford and Mazie Revere.
Speaker 3 (19:57):
Here are all the charges, youranam.
Speaker 9 (20:00):
A few ordinance is broken, about three hundred dollars worth.
I figure, nice work, Officer Jenkins.
Speaker 1 (20:06):
Thanks Uncle Elias, Peter.
Speaker 2 (20:08):
I'm crazy.
Speaker 7 (20:09):
I'll handle everything, your honor.
Speaker 1 (20:12):
I can explain.
Speaker 7 (20:12):
The charge is listed in the complaint. The whole thing
was the result of our unified efforts to make a
test case of that ridiculous kissing and public law so
that all the outmoded city statutes still in existence would
be repeated.
Speaker 9 (20:25):
Oh you did, eh, Miss Revere? Do you have any
testimony to give this court? Or I find you both
your day, your honor, what I'm telling you is the truth.
Miss Revere can bear me out? Oh she can, eh,
Miss Revere, you know the charge is brought against you.
Speaker 5 (20:40):
Tell me are you innocent?
Speaker 1 (20:42):
Eh? Well?
Speaker 2 (20:43):
None tired, Judge Honey, I know a little about the birds.
Speaker 7 (20:47):
Indeed, yes, and I insist crazy. What's come over you?
Speaker 5 (20:51):
You're you're from the south, Miss Revere?
Speaker 2 (20:56):
Show I am judge sugar. I'm just a little old
cot way down young and little old New yall Leans.
Speaker 5 (21:04):
Why tell me, nie child, I mean revered? What is
this man to you?
Speaker 2 (21:12):
He by your ana until he came over to me
in the park and tried to kiss me. I declare,
I never saw him before my whole life. What a
mazy fact that I couldn't blame him for getting flirty
with me. Judge Hanney, I guess are you young?
Speaker 3 (21:28):
And I lie young?
Speaker 5 (21:31):
I'm not that young, sugar, I mean girly.
Speaker 7 (21:35):
Amaze, this has gone too far. I've heard enough all.
Speaker 9 (21:38):
I Peter Rockford, I find you guilty of molesting this
innocent girl in the public park. Oh fine, yes, two
hundred dollars and six months in jail.
Speaker 7 (21:46):
Take him away off, Come on, jump amazing, I'll get
you for this.
Speaker 2 (21:51):
Oh did you hear that, Elae, honey, I'm scared, shown
up scared.
Speaker 5 (21:55):
Now, don't you were? Imusy you will be perfectly safe
with that young measure behind the bus.
Speaker 2 (22:01):
Well, I know, judge, you watch it, but I've still
got about now to my sailly old train leaves, and
I'm I'm scared of being all along in your city.
Is there a place where poor helpless but awful, friendly
little girl like myself and started to kill a little
time till my train comes in?
Speaker 5 (22:20):
Yea, well, my house is just down the street. If
you'd like to, will spend your last hour in town
with me?
Speaker 2 (22:31):
Will you all handsome? Coax me? Will talk me into it?
Shall we go? You know, Eli, honey, it sure has
(22:52):
been pleasant sitting with you here and this your partly
expression love scene.
Speaker 5 (22:58):
Yes, my dear, but you still seem to be afraid
of well something. You keep looking out the windows if
you were expecting somebody.
Speaker 2 (23:07):
Oh, well, that's just for to have it, sugar. When
I lived on my grandpappy plantation, I always used to
look out the wind that had the tobacco trees.
Speaker 5 (23:16):
Tobacco trees where I come from.
Speaker 2 (23:19):
The tobacco grows real talll come in Johnny say.
Speaker 5 (23:24):
How do you know who's out there just to.
Speaker 2 (23:28):
Wow gay it?
Speaker 1 (23:30):
Oh huh, well, well I find you two together just
as I thought.
Speaker 2 (23:35):
By Judge honey, what did this perfect strange mean by that?
Speaker 9 (23:38):
Yes, young man, do you realize you're breaking the law
by bursting in air?
Speaker 1 (23:42):
On the contrary, Judge murdoct as you who are breaking
the law? Yes, I mean, yeah, yeah, breaking the law?
Speaker 7 (23:49):
What law?
Speaker 1 (23:50):
A certain statue passed in eighteen sixty three whereby it
is unlawful to give refuge or harbor a Southerner, of
which this young lady is undoubtedly of your Southerner?
Speaker 2 (24:00):
You all why that all is ridiculous?
Speaker 1 (24:03):
All ain't and all judge all but the fat laws
out and mooded?
Speaker 5 (24:07):
Were they just forgot to repeal it?
Speaker 1 (24:09):
However, it is still a law punishable by life, imprisonment,
death or.
Speaker 2 (24:14):
Bull Oh we gotta do something life, honey. If I
get myself involve with the guns like this? What were
my family is laying to think?
Speaker 5 (24:23):
Whether I thought you came from New Orleans?
Speaker 2 (24:26):
Well, we move around a lot, young man. Couldn't we
all come to some kind of agreement to hush this
disgraceful thing? Else?
Speaker 7 (24:34):
Yes?
Speaker 1 (24:34):
Yes, I don't do anything.
Speaker 2 (24:36):
Oh, you're real good. Then maybe you all would forget
about those other silly, out of date laws like kissing
in public and free anybody under rest for violating saying
like that Peter Rockford.
Speaker 9 (24:51):
Ma h all right, huh, I agree to the terms,
Rockford will go free, and then I'll see to it
that tho stupid laws or repeal.
Speaker 1 (25:02):
Good Oh, judge, I insist that you put this verbal
agreement in writing. Here it has already drawn up.
Speaker 5 (25:08):
Well, you were pretty sure of yourself, weren't you, young man.
Speaker 2 (25:11):
Yeah, honey, we shore work, I mean we show was
cozy in here until this gang rapped signed handy so
often be alone again?
Speaker 1 (25:24):
Load sure.
Speaker 5 (25:28):
Satisfied? Now? Uh huh?
Speaker 2 (25:31):
Now, Johnny, go get Pete out of the clan.
Speaker 9 (25:33):
Yes, go get Hey, you just lost your Southern accent.
Speaker 2 (25:37):
Goodnight. Well it may be a little late, drool boy,
but I just decided to join the union.
Speaker 4 (25:54):
At the moment, we shall return to the adventures of Maizie.
(26:38):
Now once again, here's Macie.
Speaker 2 (26:42):
Well, that little caper wound up on the plus side
for humanity. Me and my sample cases are on our
merry way unto the light blue yonder. I sure hated
to say about it, Johnny, especially Peter. After all, something
might have come from our mutual attraction. The struggling young
lawyer immediate have something in common. We both were broke. Well,
(27:04):
little Maze, you'll just struggle along until mister Wright comes along. Yes,
when I finally put my finger in a wedding ring,
I'm gonna make real sure I ain't put my foot
in it too. Well, good go and see. Be careful.
Speaker 4 (27:26):
You just heard. The Adventures of Mazie, starring and Southern Mazie,
was written by Arthur Phillips. Original music was composed and
conducted by Harry Zimmerman. Supporting cast included Sidney Miller, Louis
Jean Heights, Earl Ross, Peter Leeds, Frank Nelson, and James Eagle.
Speaker 3 (27:48):
Jack McCoy speaking
Speaker 1 (28:03):
Are m
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