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August 12, 2025 11 mins
Being a “good man” is not the absence of bad — it’s the presence of intentional good. In this insightful and grounded episode we explore Dewayne Noel’s powerful message on what it truly means to become a man of depth, direction, and discipline. 🧱

🎙️ You’ll learn how to:
  • 🤝 Move beyond neutral living and start doing intentional good
  • 💪 Be a dangerous man — strong, capable, but in control
  • 🧠 Train your mind like a muscle: read, learn, grow
  • 🌿 Create a life of calm by cutting noise, sugar, and drama
  • 🧭 Understand the difference between knowledge and wisdom
  • 🎯 Use "fake it 'til you become it" — with purpose and clarity
This isn’t just about masculinity — it’s about self-leadership, emotional regulation, and building a life of quiet power and disciplined impact. You don’t need to be loud to be dangerous. You don’t need to be flashy to be wise. You just need to start.
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Transcript

Episode Transcript

Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:03):
You need to work on being a good man. Now,
there are a lot of people out there that don't
know what it means to be a good man. They
don't know what it means to be a good person.
Listen to me. The absence of evil is not an
automatic indication of the presence of good. You've got negative,
you have positive, and you have neutral. Is there's no negative,

(00:25):
but there's no positive either, which means it's a big zero.
You remember studying in school negative and positive numbers, all right,
Picture that graph you looked at on the page, there's
negative five, negative four, negative three, negative two negative one
zero one two three four five, And we say down
there on the negative, Dwayne, I don't do drugs, I

(00:46):
don't abuse women, and I don't steal, and I don't
do this, and I don't do that. And so they
do away with all the negatives, but they don't do
anything positive. Congratulations, That person's a big zero. Being good
is proactive doing something, And you don't have to go
and volunteer in India at an orphanage. It's just caring
about people. That poor Beliaguer cashier at Walmart with the

(01:10):
tired eyes and the swollen ankles. Just look her down
and ask her how are you doing today? Just in
your life? Be an agent for good and going through life,
become a good man. That's a lifetime right there. Study okay,
but start working on that. Second. Be a dangerous man. Now,
being dangerous is not being a threat. There are two

(01:32):
different things. And it's not about going out and lifting
weights and getting a bunch of tattoos and wearing leather
jackets and walking around. We're chesting shoulders up, haulking around
saying I'm dangerous. That's very Rarely is not a dangerous man. Often,
the most dangerous man in the room is the quietest
man in the road. I was talking to the neighbor
behind me, the manager of all this grazing land, ranch land,

(01:53):
and across the road. He had just he and his
wife had just a few head of sheep, not very many,
ten or twelve, and we were talking about and he
was talking about this is here and this is over here,
and he said, now I don't I don't recommend you
go over and check out the sheep. He has one
of those great Pyrenees dogs over there. He said, that
dog doesn't know you, and he might eat you. Protecting

(02:15):
those sheep. Now sit there for a couple of days
and watch that dog was dangerous. But that dog did
not sit on the hillside up with his head up
and his hair flowing in the wind like some kind
of lion telling the whole world I'm dangerous. He wasn't
down at the road down there barking and everything come
by he says, I'm dangerous. He was just with the sheep,
and he was not a danger to the sheep. He's
not telling everybody how dangerous he is. In fact, from

(02:38):
a distance, if you look down there, he looked like
the sheep. But you go down there and he thinks
you're trying to harm one of the sheep, it's a
different story. He's dangerous. Listen, you cannot, if we tie
this into the earlier point, be a good man. You
can't be a good man, a fully good man, if
you're not a dangerous man. To be good is to

(03:00):
do good to people. And sometimes doing good to people
is protecting those people. It's protecting those people, protecting those
around us. All Right, I'm a these days, I'm a
laid back, mellow, middle aged fella, and I kind of
talk slow and easy, and I moved slow and easy.
All right, But you say one one disrespectful thing to

(03:27):
my wife and my presence, or I get a phone
call from one of my daughters crying. I am not
only willing, but I'm able to inflict great bodily damage
and I will do so. I'm not a danger to
those around me. I'm not a danger to the sheep.
You need to be a dangerous man. Look up, there's

(03:49):
a guy on the internet and he's on YouTube, and
he discusses this. He's much murdered around. He discusses this
much better, Jordan Peterson, and he talks about this a
whole lot more eloquently than I can. All right, Uh,
but you need to First off, you need to get
it a mindset. Look, I'm not a sheep. I'm taking

(04:13):
care of those that are. It's a willingness and a mindset.
And then you work on the physical side of it,
all right. Start losing some weight, start going to the gym,
start learning some things, and third, be educated. Listen, you
want to know how to be a man among men.
You start following and reading and listening to guys like
Jocko Willett, Jordan Peterson, and start learning, start reading the

(04:37):
brain is a muscle, and like any muscle, the more
you work it, the stronger it becomes. Thirdly, be calm.
A lot of people talk on the channel about how
calm and a level I am. Look, this is not
the me that you used to be, and it's we
look at these comments of talk about how lucky your

(04:57):
children were to be raised by you. My children wi
raised by the me that is today. It's a journey,
all right. I was a hot headed, scratchy old fellow.
I just didn't know any better, all right. I had
a lot of stuff outside of family in my life
that was causing tremendous amounts of stress, and I was

(05:19):
bringing it home and I was not calm. You need
to just be calm. Be calm, Well, Dwayne, how do
I be calm? Get rid of the things that don't
let you be calm? If you come in and you
watch the news every night and just agitate, you turn

(05:41):
the dang news off. You got people in your life
that are just people of constant conflict, people of melodrama,
just people that are always stirring the pot. They're not
happy unless the pot is stirred. Just walk away. I
have friends, old friends, family, I just walked away. Just calm.

(06:08):
Find things that will make you calm. Calm music. Listen.
If you got a stressful job that you don't like,
that you're not proud of doing, and you are slamming
mountain dews and doctor peppers and sweet teas or whatever,
jacked up on sugar jack I used to drink. I
used to drink a six pack of doctor Pepper and

(06:30):
two big tall glasses of sweet tea every day and
then go to heavy, heavy stress construction jobs and stuff,
and along with the other things in my life, I
stay jacked up. I stayed just quit. Cut that stuff down,
cut it out, all right. And if you do that,

(06:51):
and then you've got cranking driving music on your radio
to work, that stuff just gets your heart going and
gets you going. So you wake up of a morning,
you got a job you hate, you don't like, you
don't want to go to, you slam some sugar breakfast down,
You grab you a Mountain Dew or a coke or
dr pepper on the way to work, and then you
crank up some hard driving music and you come screeching

(07:13):
and roaring into your job and you get out and
go in and it's machines and everything else going, and
people are not happy, and people don't want to be there,
and whatnot. Goodness, gracious, just no wonder you're about to
blow a gasket. Make some major changes in your life.
Change that music, find beauty and calm, and kind of

(07:35):
tone down on the drums and the screaming guitars a
little bit. Cut down on the sugar in the caffeine.
And there's people in your life that just just draw away,
Just draw away. You need to be calm. And then
when an inevitable conflict comes up, and it will, because
this is life, go into a calm. Go into your conflict.

(07:57):
Calm because if you're calm, you're thinking, you're logical, you're
level headed. When you get mad, all logic and reason
goes out the window. Okay, So be calm, learn to
read books that are just put you in a perspective

(08:23):
state of mind. All right, So be calm, and lastly,
be wise. Now, wisdom, it's a lifetime of study. Wisdom
is and wisdom is not what you know. Wisdom is
knowing how to apply what you know. Knowledge is knowing
that a tomato is classified as a fruit. Wisdom is
knowing not to put it in a fruit salad. You

(08:44):
don't have to open your mouth and dump out everything
that's going on in your brain. You don't have to
tell people everything, you know. You know, there's two sides
of that calm thing. There's the people who stir things
up around you. But there's the times we go around
we tell tales and we agitate, Hey I heard this,

(09:08):
I heard this? Did you hear this? And this stirring
stuff up? Be that quiet man, be that quiet man
in the corner. All right, you got something to say
that's good, beneficial, helpful, or properly corrective at the proper mind,
proper time, then say it. Otherwise, be wise, all right,

(09:29):
talking all the time about everything to everybody, that's not
an indication of the wise. And it's a journey. It's
a journey, all right. You start where you are today
and you say, I wish I was that man right there,
but I'm not. And I don't mean that particular person.
I mean that kind of man. I wish that is

(09:51):
the kind of man that I was. Well, there might
be a long journey to get to that man, but
start work at it all the time, make sacrifices. And
the other thing is you've heard the same fake it
till you make it. You see that man right there,
and you want to be that man right there. Pretend

(10:15):
to be that man right there. Listen to me, pretend
to be that man right there. Inside you say, you know,
I'm not really that man. I'm gonna act calm. I'm
gonna pretend like I'm that calm man, but I don't
feel like I am that calm man. But I'm gonna
act calm and I'm gonna pretend to be calm. Then

(10:35):
are you not calm? Do you not become calm through
that process? All right? Act like but see and picture listen.
If you don't have a destination, how do you know
when you've arrived? And how do you know how to
get there? If you don't know where you're going, sit

(10:56):
down and figure out what kind of man do I
want to be? And the beginning the journeym
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