August 15, 2025 • 25 mins
Buckle up for a wild ride with Opie and comedy heavyweights Carl Ruiz, Theo Von, Vice Henley, Sherrod Small, and Mike Bocchetti! This episode is packed with gut-busting clips, from runaway hermit crabs bouncing like renegade ping-pong balls to Opie’s epic kitchen disasters—turns out, even a tuna fish sandwich is too much for him! Mike Bocchetti’s back legs spark a swimming debate, and did that opossum really survive? Fast, funny, and totally unhinged—don’t miss it!
Mark as Played
Transcript
Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:00):
We are so different because in my house, two hermit
crabs are dead that they named my kids, and I'm
just it's been months and I told them that they're
still on the ground shedding.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Oh I can't help.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
So now I want to switch out the hermit crab.
When you go to the pet store, they sell them
with the shells that are painted, so they're gonna they're
gonna be one.
Speaker 3 (00:25):
I'll get them for.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
You with no no paint on.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
I'll get your clean ones. I'm not good for the
kids though, they can get them sick, right, they got diseases.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
They're not handling the hermit crabs.
Speaker 3 (00:38):
You got to I have a p you can't hold?
Speaker 2 (00:41):
That's good question.
Speaker 4 (00:42):
Well you got goldfish, don't you?
Speaker 3 (00:43):
You know?
Speaker 4 (00:44):
Hold on?
Speaker 5 (00:44):
I'm not a plugging fish in on farm. This is
the top very second album by the way, Pets you
Can't Hold, based on his second Girl in College, Dark.
Speaker 4 (01:06):
The Mood Today.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
Boy, how many hermit crabs?
Speaker 3 (01:09):
My buddy text me, how many hermit crabs do you
want to?
Speaker 1 (01:12):
Uh?
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Yeah too?
Speaker 2 (01:13):
And they got to be medium sized with.
Speaker 4 (01:15):
No distinct features.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Now I want let's break paint them different COVID.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Because now I want to see if the kids will believe.
Speaker 3 (01:21):
This, you're gonna trick them. You're gonna come back out with.
Speaker 4 (01:25):
Guys.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
I mean they're told that in school.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
Not the thing on the floor and go oops, it's
over and you're done dropping.
Speaker 6 (01:34):
Yeah, crab, I mean, if you've seasoned it right, grab me.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
There's someone in Louisiana right now.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Wasting a meal.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
I guaranteee you someone in right, kid, My kids had goldfish.
Speaker 7 (01:57):
My son assassinated him.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
All he turned the heat her up. There's a blood.
Speaker 7 (02:00):
Bat you're gonna heat up in the fish tank.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Yeah, we put a little heater in the tank.
Speaker 4 (02:07):
Right, he boiled them.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Goldfish are doing that. You know.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
My wife bought these bullshit glowing in the dark fish.
Speaker 7 (02:14):
They come with cancer, these fucking things, and send me
on fish.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Those are boring.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
You just want to spice up your wife.
Speaker 7 (02:22):
You know, she scratched off ridge, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
So she goes to the store.
Speaker 8 (02:25):
She buys them this crazy tank, right, the skeleton with
the bubbles and.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
The treasure chests, and puts these shitty nickel fish in there,
puts the heater.
Speaker 7 (02:33):
My kid, you know, it's got nothing else to do.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
He's done picking his nose. She's like gonna be funk
with the fish.
Speaker 5 (02:38):
So he turned all the way all the ways brought
it to a nice boil toiling fish smell in that room.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Boy, you sure it wasn't the ick that got him.
What's the sick?
Speaker 3 (02:53):
Oh? Vic nose right diase? Disease he's, I believe, commonly
known as fin rot thin rock it.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Maybe maybe I think he's right because we had fish
growing up. Our mistake was we had guppies, right, and
we would let the guppies have more and more guppies,
and we would save the guppies in a in a
small tank within the big tanks to protect them, and
then when they were big enough they.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
We would release them. And then our tanks were always overcrowded.
And then the fin.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Rock take out the whole tank, everybody, the whole fucking thing.
Old fishades, Oh man, good, he got old old fish.
Speaker 4 (03:41):
From the bee.
Speaker 1 (03:49):
I don't know what I'm gonna use them and use
them for having fish.
Speaker 7 (03:53):
Got fishades.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
Now we're gonna have somebody from Peter Colonist. You know
fish mellot.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
You see hermit crab chain shells.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
I got vide shells go from shell to shell's see it,
it looks like a fucking alien because they don't the
crab shells.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
You gotta throw some uh you know, bigger shells in
your tank and.
Speaker 3 (04:17):
Then when they're ready, they'll switch. Yeah, here it is.
Is it like transitioning better knees? Transitioning right? He said,
I remember, look at this. This is my actual hermit
(04:39):
crab that's no longer with us you had, but this
is you.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
This is your video just takes its ass out of
the shell any second.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Now, look at this ship. That's what all the poison is.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
And then he throws it into the other shell and
then twitch around and that's new home.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
That is great. You got a bigger home. Man moved up.
Speaker 7 (05:05):
She smells like fact eye belly button times ten.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
It's hermit crab on the east side, like George and Wheezy.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
These things.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
I knew you would get a normal You have one
Norman lit the other day was.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
Mall and look then then it just takes off. That's
those things are tricky though.
Speaker 6 (05:40):
Man.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
We'd come home and they would be gone out of
the fucking tank and then just in the apartment somewhere,
and then they would show up two.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
Weeks later, what what kind of tank was it? And
they would have to bow.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
They were on a counter, so they were like they
were falling off the counter to try to get away.
Speaker 2 (05:56):
So you know that show would just be bouncing.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
It can't be a safe enough that.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
I had a little stick and had a little like
screen thing they.
Speaker 4 (06:06):
Could climb up.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
Then they were climbing up and you broke the.
Speaker 7 (06:09):
Ladder way out stop couldn't handle a hermit crab.
Speaker 4 (06:16):
I never heard of herbi cl climbing out the more
than one learn our lessons.
Speaker 2 (06:23):
That's why I look I started. I told you.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
Then we take care of the swan, and we've had
it to becotch one day. My overall goal is to
be gamekeeper.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
Hedgehog hermit craft.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
He God, this man could terrible steel ball. I don't understand.
But he's in an apartment in New York.
Speaker 7 (06:43):
No matter how big it is, it's just a couple
of thousand square feet.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
They were far away from the tank too, wanted out.
Speaker 3 (06:50):
When's the last time you checked them?
Speaker 1 (06:51):
You know how long herbit craft to get to an
We then we ended up finding him, but one at
one point it was a couple of weeks.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
We looked under the couch in the huh, you know what?
The camera should just be on him. Everything he does
is not what everyone else does.
Speaker 6 (07:11):
I don't understand he climbed out the fish tank with
the shell on him, like two weeks later in the
house of week, they're far away.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Have you ever seen a heart crab when he was
torturing the.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
What the fu.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
Should just spit on them? Why did they want to
get out?
Speaker 1 (07:28):
We had a nice big tank too, We didn't go
with the small one that the pet store gave us.
Speaker 4 (07:33):
So these things shouldn't be petsy.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
A hermit crab, and it wasn't a.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
Person's That's that same thing in that video.
Speaker 7 (07:41):
I had a hermit crab.
Speaker 8 (07:42):
It took him an hour to get to that little
cricket ball on the side of the You had a
tired one.
Speaker 7 (07:54):
Up hermic crabs.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
Cancel take about the tank and playing with the I'm telling.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
You, I'm gonna go out and live right here. This
is a black opie story. He killed these fucking things
because his story doesn't match up. If there was a
hermit craft cop, you would have locked up already. Have
anything to say on this, It's just baffling.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
It's like, who built any kind of thing for them
to crawl out of it at least second figure out
how to get to work on time.
Speaker 4 (08:26):
Shots to everyone around here that I can't get.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
To work on time. Love that show the First forty eight.
She had a first forty eight and hermit, he.
Speaker 5 (08:38):
Took my headphone's eating as eat a sandwich.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
He's getting joking, I don't taking up the dog and
he killed you killed and kill him.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
See I did my joke and I was kidding and
you did and it was me.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
We're working, we're working on I don't know how that happened,
but you feeling.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
I really like it.
Speaker 5 (09:08):
No, thank you bringing up, tell him to come back.
He's eating, He's doing a lot of things now. My
mom My mom can't cook anymore.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
Carl.
Speaker 5 (09:16):
Of course, you got our drives in her hands really bad.
And I want I told him, I told Greg here
is that we should have her call him one day.
I'll bring in the electrics kill it and I want
her to talk you through making her fried chicken.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Because it is.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
That's a great idea, damn delicious.
Speaker 8 (09:32):
You've got to do me a favor, though, if we
do it, you can't have all the chiming in during
the thing.
Speaker 5 (09:38):
He's not allowed me and Roland talking about this allowed
to comment on food because he's the fun wrong.
Speaker 3 (09:44):
When you how you're right now, I feel.
Speaker 4 (09:50):
I'm turning into basketball Vick just talking about it.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Are you kidding me?
Speaker 3 (09:54):
Listen?
Speaker 1 (09:54):
This was you saw my tuna fish sandwich the other
day with the grapes on the side and the right bread.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
Cell block C seven chefs?
Speaker 2 (10:01):
That was I have a lumber tattooed on your wrist,
and where's my lunch right there?
Speaker 3 (10:08):
Looks wrong with that.
Speaker 5 (10:09):
Let's start with all three things in the picture.
Speaker 3 (10:13):
That's why the herbitt killed himself. Did you make you
wanted to give himself up for cannibalism? Comes like yeah,
the next if this motherfucker is that he's gonna eat me.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Now you understand how fresh that rye bread is right there,
I'm gonna say that dense.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
I want to say the perfect Yes, that right?
Speaker 7 (10:31):
That right is nice?
Speaker 8 (10:32):
No caraway seed, good job, thank you, very dense. The
middle of bread is called crumb.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
That's what people don't know.
Speaker 7 (10:38):
So the middle of the breads called the crumb, very
dense crumb, fantastic.
Speaker 3 (10:42):
Bread's good.
Speaker 7 (10:44):
That's a problem.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
Yeah, it's beautiful, beautiful maple construction.
Speaker 3 (10:50):
I gott it.
Speaker 7 (10:52):
No, that's a that's a cutting board counter.
Speaker 3 (10:54):
You see. That's very nice. He's got I got it.
I got that much cat heading worked. I got to defend.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Myself on the plates where the tun construction?
Speaker 1 (11:04):
Right?
Speaker 3 (11:05):
Paper? Okay, all right, but I've been seeing the plates
for a while.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Paper plates, grapes and english.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
Obviously you eat like the gym. Everybody hates.
Speaker 4 (11:19):
Everybody hates that one.
Speaker 9 (11:21):
You guys see the flakes, you guys see the flakes
on the on the little urine sample bowl that he's
using it for the that's because he's using a knife,
so he's breaking the membrane of the tuna, so he's
making it stringy.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
That's a big problem.
Speaker 4 (11:37):
Everybody.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
Thank god, rookie. Now you're crazy.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
Yeah, and you know, I'm what part about you should
not even be talking basketball.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
Think, don't give a fuck.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
The string listening.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
Food, half spreading oysters for sin.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Oh my god, about one hundred fucking people in here,
and you give him to fish that's stringy and uh
fish that's not No one's.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Gonna you get some taste the difference.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
You go right now.
Speaker 8 (12:15):
You ask one hundred people that know you know me,
and say, who do you want to cook for you anything?
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Who do you think they're gonna pick? Oh yeah, obviously.
Speaker 2 (12:28):
Red peppers on his RIGATONI.
Speaker 3 (12:31):
But he looks like that's what makes me crazy?
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Yeah, obviously I don't believe he's got like horse skills.
My cooking is very sensible. That's why they would pick
cooking you. He thinks up and you're eating within like
a half hour, not ten hours later.
Speaker 6 (12:49):
He froze his chicken and rentals and the chicken out
the freezer and put the whole and let's talk watch this,
watch watches. This isn't even a watch this thick.
Speaker 3 (13:04):
Let's walk through your your mom, who's probably a saint
in a great check.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
We get him on the phone.
Speaker 3 (13:08):
He's meaner in a snake. I could call her.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
We have to go to break.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
We'll have to go to break, just because the live
reads once again, Okay, what do you got next for us?
Speaker 5 (13:18):
Listen to Tall but True? I did Ben Bailey and
DC Beniz the podcast where they tell stories. So that's
on is Tall but True, Tall but True?
Speaker 3 (13:26):
True? Yeah? Get that? Get that. I'm on this week.
It was really fun.
Speaker 5 (13:29):
You know, it's all Heckler stories. The whole episode is
just stuff talking about Heckler.
Speaker 3 (13:33):
Ben Bailey got some good one.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Ben Bailey beat a man in the bathroom with the
comedy seller.
Speaker 6 (13:38):
I remember he's able to put He said, I'm gonna
put my boothly your chests would at.
Speaker 3 (13:41):
The comedy club.
Speaker 4 (13:43):
Every word of it.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
Problem.
Speaker 4 (13:49):
I love him, love problem.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
He's gonna what I I love.
Speaker 3 (13:56):
I can't straight up went out.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
Get him on.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
Him, Carl, I promise Carl, I get him a shipload
Instagram followers today, because for a chef, Instagram is everything.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
What is it again?
Speaker 2 (14:18):
Chef boar? Chef still okay? S A b O r
h E.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
I'm talking about you see the first sandwich? You know what?
I ain't.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Stringing stringing, Sorry, no flavor.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
Everybody's so upset.
Speaker 4 (14:34):
You got to teach him how to cut up his food.
Speaker 7 (14:36):
I want to go through a fried chicken recipe.
Speaker 8 (14:38):
I bet you he can't be quiet for a second
without saying something crazy here comes.
Speaker 3 (14:45):
He's always whatever he's about to say. Yeah, he's got
his magic here too.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Tell him what's up?
Speaker 10 (14:50):
Ken h You have always cooked me a wonderful steak, barbecue.
So I would like you to cook for me. And
when I go a Call's restaurant, pick up the check.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
You know, you know he doesn't any crabs, right, he
doesn't eat anything. He doesn't any crabs, he doesn't eat anything.
He sends me pictures and potatoes.
Speaker 3 (15:15):
He sends me pictures.
Speaker 7 (15:16):
He's like, would you eat this beautiful thing crabs? I'm like, yeah,
it's delicious.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
I watched him. They made a wonderful that's all.
Speaker 10 (15:24):
Yeah, that's Vic treated me to a nice steak dinner.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
About me and everybody? Everybody with him? Was there everybody
where You're going after Lewis.
Speaker 10 (15:40):
No, I was just starting a fact.
Speaker 5 (15:44):
I wasn't there.
Speaker 4 (15:46):
You treat him to a nice steak.
Speaker 3 (15:47):
Yeah, that's what he said.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
But g H is always very accommodating for.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Treating me to a nice steak.
Speaker 10 (15:55):
Dude, will again call picked up the check when I
went to his restaurants.
Speaker 4 (15:59):
Always of white castles, aprotam come through.
Speaker 3 (16:04):
What got you?
Speaker 2 (16:06):
The wings?
Speaker 4 (16:07):
The best wings in the city, the best sliders. Think
a great slider.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Had very good I got.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
He eats more bland than I. Steak and dry potatoes,
very plain vegetable.
Speaker 3 (16:22):
You should do a food show.
Speaker 7 (16:24):
You two should do a food show at a hospice.
Speaker 3 (16:29):
That was funny.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
That was funny.
Speaker 3 (16:31):
That was really funny.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Let's make fried chicken together. That'll be a first video.
Speaker 3 (16:35):
We remember we were trying to do this. We're gonna
do big Mom's recipes.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Not your hostel said, if I do my no, I
say it.
Speaker 3 (16:50):
On an air fryer.
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Huh.
Speaker 7 (16:52):
Air fryers are cool there, like apartments and stuff. I mean,
it's cool if you got nothing else to do, if
you want to just hack around, it's fine.
Speaker 10 (16:59):
Is it the same thing as a convection oven.
Speaker 3 (17:02):
No, it's it's different. It's it's it's different. It's like
a microwave and a fire together. Fat.
Speaker 7 (17:09):
I mean, it's just it's just it's new ways of
making less flavor.
Speaker 3 (17:15):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (17:16):
More importantly, can I listen to your conversations?
Speaker 2 (17:21):
Can I listen to your conversations?
Speaker 3 (17:23):
What happened?
Speaker 2 (17:24):
You know they're listening to us through them all?
Speaker 3 (17:25):
That's right, bad lady from Trump?
Speaker 2 (17:27):
That lady Kelly and Conway. U s a b O
R chef on Instagram, bar bar chef.
Speaker 8 (17:38):
I'll put real pictures of food, or you can follow
Opie and watch them make string cheese out of tuna.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
Right, Thank you, hey man. My videos do real well
with the cooking. They get it, they get it to do,
don't say it to do things.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
The wrong way. We got people that work two jobs
soaked their ribs for eight hours. Show another way, who's
soaking ribs.
Speaker 10 (18:13):
A friend of mine told me that his secret to
good tuna fishes to break it up with your fingers.
Speaker 3 (18:18):
Bad friend.
Speaker 4 (18:19):
Oh really.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
Like the membrane.
Speaker 2 (18:22):
What's the best the best.
Speaker 3 (18:24):
Man at my wedding? You can that don't mean anything
in the kitchen.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Let me tell you the best way to break up
to it is the back of a spoon.
Speaker 8 (18:33):
You dip it in a little bit of mayo and
keep a nice loop, and you press it up against
the bowl right and get flatten it out.
Speaker 7 (18:39):
And that way you crush the membranes in the little
celery in the onions and it gives them nice electra flavor.
Speaker 5 (18:45):
Welcome to the food networks, semid I walk.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Into the kitchens, people start to fucking apologize the minute
I walk in.
Speaker 3 (18:57):
You got the back of a.
Speaker 5 (19:00):
Spook glube mayonnaise as lou all I got out of
that conversation.
Speaker 3 (19:09):
That's all you need. That's all you need, Mayo is
lou learn it, live it it, Mayo. May look at here,
just out to.
Speaker 4 (19:22):
Pocket life and let.
Speaker 8 (19:24):
Me tell you and I'll give you guys a little
tip to make the best grilled cheese sandwiches in the world.
Speaker 3 (19:29):
Okay, Mayo said, butter Man said butter all right, get here.
But yes, like on the inside and outside, it goes
on the grip.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
That's your problem and most people's problems. You've never had
a bad girl cheese, said Mayo.
Speaker 3 (19:48):
Girl cheese right, Oh my god, you know, but he's
probably had a hundred times in a dynam I'm going
to get another coffee. I cannot do it, dude, this
new black op.
Speaker 2 (20:06):
I'm only zero point one percent. Relax.
Speaker 3 (20:10):
It's your origin.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
Brother, enough to talk ship.
Speaker 4 (20:14):
The third floor for the building coming down?
Speaker 10 (20:17):
Brother, Yes, can I say something before we go? As
were on the subject of tuna fish. I had a
friend that stuttered and he went into the deli to
order a tuna fish sandwich because he stuttered, he said
to tuna and they gave him two sandwiches, and he
(20:38):
was so embarrassed he just paid for them.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Oh, poor fellow. Okay, all right, all right, Well we've got.
Speaker 11 (20:46):
You got your brave man, I can't even swim. You
got your viabond here.
Speaker 2 (20:50):
You know you can't swim?
Speaker 3 (20:51):
No, it takes a lessons.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
Why can't you swim?
Speaker 3 (20:55):
I can, you know, like paddle like this? That's about it.
Speaker 11 (21:00):
My back legs are fucking horrific.
Speaker 12 (21:02):
Oh you gotta you gotta, you gotta loosen up a
little my back legs.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
You know what.
Speaker 5 (21:11):
He's got me man, one out of four got that.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
By the way, we all just listen like, yeah, I'll
tell you back your backs are we thank you, Mike.
Speaker 2 (21:23):
We all just let it go. Well no, yeah, yeah,
mine too. I can see where your back legs wherever
you say tadpool?
Speaker 1 (21:34):
Man?
Speaker 12 (21:35):
Wow, have you tried to swam?
Speaker 3 (21:39):
What happened?
Speaker 11 (21:40):
My brother in law has a pool. I'm afreid of
even diving to that. I mean, I just like walking
out slow.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
You should be afraid of div into that if you
can't swim.
Speaker 6 (21:47):
Sure.
Speaker 11 (21:48):
I was drowned though, and I was twenty eight. That's why,
because you know twenty eight a couple of times ocean cool.
You gotta because I want them to slide. I thought
it was just like, let's see what happens, right, I thought, Linda, like,
you know, four or five feet of water? Six feet
of water? Yeah, so I was starting to go down.
My friend, there's a big guy like me, jumped the
roller fucking clothes on.
Speaker 3 (22:09):
And pulled me right there.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
Wou who assumes that it's gonna be four feet of
water when they don't swim? Didn't you see the eight
ft on the side.
Speaker 11 (22:18):
I just calculations are pretty wrong.
Speaker 3 (22:22):
He didn't have his glasses. I only thought that the
eight like a full.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
Word tough one to say from drowning, by the way, Yeah, right,
that would be the brillant.
Speaker 11 (22:32):
Like right, my friend's a big guy.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
Just like.
Speaker 12 (22:35):
Were you scared?
Speaker 3 (22:37):
Terrified? Wow?
Speaker 11 (22:38):
I didn't want to I didn't want to go to
I was wondering when I was. When I was going
down for the third time, I was like, please Jesus Christ,
bring me back home or something. I don't want to
meet the other guy.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
When you're drowning, you pray to Jonah. That's what you're
supposed to do.
Speaker 12 (22:50):
Really, Yeah, yeah, Joe on the whale got to get
out there.
Speaker 3 (22:54):
Brother was holy man, I love this what it's amazing?
You love it?
Speaker 1 (23:03):
No?
Speaker 3 (23:03):
No, he said, he thinks, I think it's very cool.
Speaker 5 (23:06):
One of my idiot friends in high school had the
idea that we should all take lessons, and so we
started doing this when I was like seventeen eighteen years old.
Speaker 11 (23:13):
Now, but I might, I mean, like people mp from
planes the library on. You've never parachuted?
Speaker 2 (23:17):
Oh, I have never tell you?
Speaker 3 (23:19):
He trip manil Oh, come on, man, I.
Speaker 11 (23:26):
Jump ish it.
Speaker 3 (23:26):
I mean ten thousand feet all the way down to
the ground.
Speaker 2 (23:29):
Yeah, like twenty feet.
Speaker 4 (23:32):
Laid on your back legs. Ye, your back legs for that.
Speaker 5 (23:36):
I was telling somebody a possum fact yesterday, that my
brothers captured a possum, and uh. One kid in the
neighborhood said, the only thing you knew about the possums
was his older brother had told him that you could
shoot him in the head with a twenty two rifle
and the possum would still run for about four or
five hundred yards.
Speaker 3 (23:51):
Wow, put the gun right to his head, put the
bullet in its head, and he would run. So we
did this. We went through. Yes, it totally happened. We
lost him.
Speaker 5 (23:58):
He ran away from us where he got away from us?
And so with a bullet in his head, just going
You shot a Possumly I hadn't do it. My middle
mic did when he was fifteen. Somebody took the challenge.
Speaker 3 (24:08):
Yes, we took the challenge. There was like nine of
us in the neighborhood.
Speaker 5 (24:10):
We shot the possum in the head, and then as
it ran towards the woods to get away from us,
we all eight or nine. It was ran right along
behind it, you know, the possum right along behind us.
How gonna go hill for the idiot fun? There's nothing
to do in the neighborhood.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
I believe the possum thing, though, because didn't you have
a sister.
Speaker 3 (24:29):
No, and my mom was at work. We were unsupervised.
My older brother, who was like seventeen, he was in
charge of us. So I was like five, yeah, you know, yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:38):
Looking through whatever the hell you are.
Speaker 1 (24:39):
But I believe the possum thing because when I was
living out on Long Island, I rode over a possum
and it was one of those you know, and I'm like, oh,
that thing is so dead.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
And I looked through my rear view mirror and sure enough.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
That thing kept walking in the side of I'm like,
I just ran that thing over and it's.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Still a lie.
Speaker 5 (24:58):
Oh yeah, they're just we need more, I guess, you know,
we need some letters us. We need to get them
in the military.
Speaker 12 (25:03):
Armadillas they call them Russian possible room.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
Yeah, those they're armored, they're.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
Ready, they were ready for war.
Speaker 13 (25:11):
The uh they had a lady, allegedly a breastfed one
by us, This black lady. Really you think it would
be a white woman. When I first heard the room,
I was like, yeah, naturally the white lady. She breastfed
an armadilla that had been sick.
Speaker 2 (25:26):
Oh good for her.
Speaker 3 (25:27):
Beautiful.
Speaker 12 (25:27):
Really, it's almost like a little grapes of wrath for
our neighborhood.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
That is a wonderful story. You need a good story
from your upbringing, because most of them are horrific.
Speaker 3 (25:34):
Man.
Speaker 5 (25:37):
Boo boo boo boo boo boo
We are so different because in my house, two hermit
crabs are dead that they named my kids, and I'm
just it's been months and I told them that they're
still on the ground shedding.
Speaker 2 (00:12):
Oh I can't help.
Speaker 1 (00:17):
So now I want to switch out the hermit crab.
When you go to the pet store, they sell them
with the shells that are painted, so they're gonna they're
gonna be one.
Speaker 3 (00:25):
I'll get them for.
Speaker 2 (00:25):
You with no no paint on.
Speaker 3 (00:28):
I'll get your clean ones. I'm not good for the
kids though, they can get them sick, right, they got diseases.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
They're not handling the hermit crabs.
Speaker 3 (00:38):
You got to I have a p you can't hold?
Speaker 2 (00:41):
That's good question.
Speaker 4 (00:42):
Well you got goldfish, don't you?
Speaker 3 (00:43):
You know?
Speaker 4 (00:44):
Hold on?
Speaker 5 (00:44):
I'm not a plugging fish in on farm. This is
the top very second album by the way, Pets you
Can't Hold, based on his second Girl in College, Dark.
Speaker 4 (01:06):
The Mood Today.
Speaker 2 (01:06):
Boy, how many hermit crabs?
Speaker 3 (01:09):
My buddy text me, how many hermit crabs do you
want to?
Speaker 1 (01:12):
Uh?
Speaker 3 (01:12):
Yeah too?
Speaker 2 (01:13):
And they got to be medium sized with.
Speaker 4 (01:15):
No distinct features.
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Now I want let's break paint them different COVID.
Speaker 2 (01:19):
Because now I want to see if the kids will believe.
Speaker 3 (01:21):
This, you're gonna trick them. You're gonna come back out with.
Speaker 4 (01:25):
Guys.
Speaker 3 (01:26):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (01:27):
I mean they're told that in school.
Speaker 1 (01:29):
Not the thing on the floor and go oops, it's
over and you're done dropping.
Speaker 6 (01:34):
Yeah, crab, I mean, if you've seasoned it right, grab me.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
There's someone in Louisiana right now.
Speaker 2 (01:43):
Wasting a meal.
Speaker 3 (01:44):
I guaranteee you someone in right, kid, My kids had goldfish.
Speaker 7 (01:57):
My son assassinated him.
Speaker 3 (01:58):
All he turned the heat her up. There's a blood.
Speaker 7 (02:00):
Bat you're gonna heat up in the fish tank.
Speaker 2 (02:04):
Yeah, we put a little heater in the tank.
Speaker 4 (02:07):
Right, he boiled them.
Speaker 2 (02:08):
Goldfish are doing that. You know.
Speaker 1 (02:10):
My wife bought these bullshit glowing in the dark fish.
Speaker 7 (02:14):
They come with cancer, these fucking things, and send me
on fish.
Speaker 2 (02:17):
Those are boring.
Speaker 3 (02:18):
You just want to spice up your wife.
Speaker 7 (02:22):
You know, she scratched off ridge, you know what I mean.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
So she goes to the store.
Speaker 8 (02:25):
She buys them this crazy tank, right, the skeleton with
the bubbles and.
Speaker 1 (02:29):
The treasure chests, and puts these shitty nickel fish in there,
puts the heater.
Speaker 7 (02:33):
My kid, you know, it's got nothing else to do.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
He's done picking his nose. She's like gonna be funk
with the fish.
Speaker 5 (02:38):
So he turned all the way all the ways brought
it to a nice boil toiling fish smell in that room.
Speaker 2 (02:49):
Boy, you sure it wasn't the ick that got him.
What's the sick?
Speaker 3 (02:53):
Oh? Vic nose right diase? Disease he's, I believe, commonly
known as fin rot thin rock it.
Speaker 1 (03:08):
Maybe maybe I think he's right because we had fish
growing up. Our mistake was we had guppies, right, and
we would let the guppies have more and more guppies,
and we would save the guppies in a in a
small tank within the big tanks to protect them, and
then when they were big enough they.
Speaker 2 (03:23):
We would release them. And then our tanks were always overcrowded.
And then the fin.
Speaker 1 (03:28):
Rock take out the whole tank, everybody, the whole fucking thing.
Old fishades, Oh man, good, he got old old fish.
Speaker 4 (03:41):
From the bee.
Speaker 1 (03:49):
I don't know what I'm gonna use them and use
them for having fish.
Speaker 7 (03:53):
Got fishades.
Speaker 3 (03:55):
Now we're gonna have somebody from Peter Colonist. You know
fish mellot.
Speaker 2 (04:02):
You see hermit crab chain shells.
Speaker 1 (04:05):
I got vide shells go from shell to shell's see it,
it looks like a fucking alien because they don't the
crab shells.
Speaker 2 (04:14):
You gotta throw some uh you know, bigger shells in
your tank and.
Speaker 3 (04:17):
Then when they're ready, they'll switch. Yeah, here it is.
Is it like transitioning better knees? Transitioning right? He said,
I remember, look at this. This is my actual hermit
(04:39):
crab that's no longer with us you had, but this
is you.
Speaker 1 (04:43):
This is your video just takes its ass out of
the shell any second.
Speaker 3 (04:49):
Now, look at this ship. That's what all the poison is.
Speaker 1 (04:56):
And then he throws it into the other shell and
then twitch around and that's new home.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
That is great. You got a bigger home. Man moved up.
Speaker 7 (05:05):
She smells like fact eye belly button times ten.
Speaker 4 (05:07):
It's hermit crab on the east side, like George and Wheezy.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
These things.
Speaker 3 (05:12):
I knew you would get a normal You have one
Norman lit the other day was.
Speaker 2 (05:20):
Mall and look then then it just takes off. That's
those things are tricky though.
Speaker 6 (05:40):
Man.
Speaker 1 (05:40):
We'd come home and they would be gone out of
the fucking tank and then just in the apartment somewhere,
and then they would show up two.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
Weeks later, what what kind of tank was it? And
they would have to bow.
Speaker 1 (05:51):
They were on a counter, so they were like they
were falling off the counter to try to get away.
Speaker 2 (05:56):
So you know that show would just be bouncing.
Speaker 3 (05:58):
It can't be a safe enough that.
Speaker 2 (06:02):
I had a little stick and had a little like
screen thing they.
Speaker 4 (06:06):
Could climb up.
Speaker 2 (06:07):
Then they were climbing up and you broke the.
Speaker 7 (06:09):
Ladder way out stop couldn't handle a hermit crab.
Speaker 4 (06:16):
I never heard of herbi cl climbing out the more
than one learn our lessons.
Speaker 2 (06:23):
That's why I look I started. I told you.
Speaker 3 (06:26):
Then we take care of the swan, and we've had
it to becotch one day. My overall goal is to
be gamekeeper.
Speaker 2 (06:34):
Hedgehog hermit craft.
Speaker 3 (06:36):
He God, this man could terrible steel ball. I don't understand.
But he's in an apartment in New York.
Speaker 7 (06:43):
No matter how big it is, it's just a couple
of thousand square feet.
Speaker 2 (06:45):
They were far away from the tank too, wanted out.
Speaker 3 (06:50):
When's the last time you checked them?
Speaker 1 (06:51):
You know how long herbit craft to get to an
We then we ended up finding him, but one at
one point it was a couple of weeks.
Speaker 2 (07:01):
We looked under the couch in the huh, you know what?
The camera should just be on him. Everything he does
is not what everyone else does.
Speaker 6 (07:11):
I don't understand he climbed out the fish tank with
the shell on him, like two weeks later in the
house of week, they're far away.
Speaker 2 (07:18):
Have you ever seen a heart crab when he was
torturing the.
Speaker 3 (07:23):
What the fu.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
Should just spit on them? Why did they want to
get out?
Speaker 1 (07:28):
We had a nice big tank too, We didn't go
with the small one that the pet store gave us.
Speaker 4 (07:33):
So these things shouldn't be petsy.
Speaker 3 (07:37):
A hermit crab, and it wasn't a.
Speaker 2 (07:38):
Person's That's that same thing in that video.
Speaker 7 (07:41):
I had a hermit crab.
Speaker 8 (07:42):
It took him an hour to get to that little
cricket ball on the side of the You had a
tired one.
Speaker 7 (07:54):
Up hermic crabs.
Speaker 2 (07:59):
Cancel take about the tank and playing with the I'm telling.
Speaker 3 (08:02):
You, I'm gonna go out and live right here. This
is a black opie story. He killed these fucking things
because his story doesn't match up. If there was a
hermit craft cop, you would have locked up already. Have
anything to say on this, It's just baffling.
Speaker 2 (08:18):
It's like, who built any kind of thing for them
to crawl out of it at least second figure out
how to get to work on time.
Speaker 4 (08:26):
Shots to everyone around here that I can't get.
Speaker 2 (08:29):
To work on time. Love that show the First forty eight.
She had a first forty eight and hermit, he.
Speaker 5 (08:38):
Took my headphone's eating as eat a sandwich.
Speaker 2 (08:50):
He's getting joking, I don't taking up the dog and
he killed you killed and kill him.
Speaker 3 (08:57):
See I did my joke and I was kidding and
you did and it was me.
Speaker 2 (09:02):
We're working, we're working on I don't know how that happened,
but you feeling.
Speaker 3 (09:07):
I really like it.
Speaker 5 (09:08):
No, thank you bringing up, tell him to come back.
He's eating, He's doing a lot of things now. My
mom My mom can't cook anymore.
Speaker 3 (09:16):
Carl.
Speaker 5 (09:16):
Of course, you got our drives in her hands really bad.
And I want I told him, I told Greg here
is that we should have her call him one day.
I'll bring in the electrics kill it and I want
her to talk you through making her fried chicken.
Speaker 3 (09:29):
Because it is.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
That's a great idea, damn delicious.
Speaker 8 (09:32):
You've got to do me a favor, though, if we
do it, you can't have all the chiming in during
the thing.
Speaker 5 (09:38):
He's not allowed me and Roland talking about this allowed
to comment on food because he's the fun wrong.
Speaker 3 (09:44):
When you how you're right now, I feel.
Speaker 4 (09:50):
I'm turning into basketball Vick just talking about it.
Speaker 2 (09:53):
Are you kidding me?
Speaker 3 (09:54):
Listen?
Speaker 1 (09:54):
This was you saw my tuna fish sandwich the other
day with the grapes on the side and the right bread.
Speaker 3 (10:00):
Cell block C seven chefs?
Speaker 2 (10:01):
That was I have a lumber tattooed on your wrist,
and where's my lunch right there?
Speaker 3 (10:08):
Looks wrong with that.
Speaker 5 (10:09):
Let's start with all three things in the picture.
Speaker 3 (10:13):
That's why the herbitt killed himself. Did you make you
wanted to give himself up for cannibalism? Comes like yeah,
the next if this motherfucker is that he's gonna eat me.
Speaker 1 (10:23):
Now you understand how fresh that rye bread is right there,
I'm gonna say that dense.
Speaker 2 (10:30):
I want to say the perfect Yes, that right?
Speaker 7 (10:31):
That right is nice?
Speaker 8 (10:32):
No caraway seed, good job, thank you, very dense. The
middle of bread is called crumb.
Speaker 3 (10:37):
That's what people don't know.
Speaker 7 (10:38):
So the middle of the breads called the crumb, very
dense crumb, fantastic.
Speaker 3 (10:42):
Bread's good.
Speaker 7 (10:44):
That's a problem.
Speaker 2 (10:45):
Yeah, it's beautiful, beautiful maple construction.
Speaker 3 (10:50):
I gott it.
Speaker 7 (10:52):
No, that's a that's a cutting board counter.
Speaker 3 (10:54):
You see. That's very nice. He's got I got it.
I got that much cat heading worked. I got to defend.
Speaker 2 (11:01):
Myself on the plates where the tun construction?
Speaker 1 (11:04):
Right?
Speaker 3 (11:05):
Paper? Okay, all right, but I've been seeing the plates
for a while.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
Paper plates, grapes and english.
Speaker 3 (11:12):
Obviously you eat like the gym. Everybody hates.
Speaker 4 (11:19):
Everybody hates that one.
Speaker 9 (11:21):
You guys see the flakes, you guys see the flakes
on the on the little urine sample bowl that he's
using it for the that's because he's using a knife,
so he's breaking the membrane of the tuna, so he's
making it stringy.
Speaker 2 (11:34):
That's a big problem.
Speaker 4 (11:37):
Everybody.
Speaker 2 (11:40):
Thank god, rookie. Now you're crazy.
Speaker 3 (11:46):
Yeah, and you know, I'm what part about you should
not even be talking basketball.
Speaker 4 (11:52):
Think, don't give a fuck.
Speaker 2 (11:56):
The string listening.
Speaker 3 (12:01):
Food, half spreading oysters for sin.
Speaker 1 (12:05):
Oh my god, about one hundred fucking people in here,
and you give him to fish that's stringy and uh
fish that's not No one's.
Speaker 2 (12:12):
Gonna you get some taste the difference.
Speaker 3 (12:15):
You go right now.
Speaker 8 (12:15):
You ask one hundred people that know you know me,
and say, who do you want to cook for you anything?
Speaker 3 (12:21):
Who do you think they're gonna pick? Oh yeah, obviously.
Speaker 2 (12:28):
Red peppers on his RIGATONI.
Speaker 3 (12:31):
But he looks like that's what makes me crazy?
Speaker 2 (12:34):
Yeah, obviously I don't believe he's got like horse skills.
My cooking is very sensible. That's why they would pick
cooking you. He thinks up and you're eating within like
a half hour, not ten hours later.
Speaker 6 (12:49):
He froze his chicken and rentals and the chicken out
the freezer and put the whole and let's talk watch this,
watch watches. This isn't even a watch this thick.
Speaker 3 (13:04):
Let's walk through your your mom, who's probably a saint
in a great check.
Speaker 2 (13:07):
We get him on the phone.
Speaker 3 (13:08):
He's meaner in a snake. I could call her.
Speaker 2 (13:11):
We have to go to break.
Speaker 1 (13:14):
We'll have to go to break, just because the live
reads once again, Okay, what do you got next for us?
Speaker 5 (13:18):
Listen to Tall but True? I did Ben Bailey and
DC Beniz the podcast where they tell stories. So that's
on is Tall but True, Tall but True?
Speaker 3 (13:26):
True? Yeah? Get that? Get that. I'm on this week.
It was really fun.
Speaker 5 (13:29):
You know, it's all Heckler stories. The whole episode is
just stuff talking about Heckler.
Speaker 3 (13:33):
Ben Bailey got some good one.
Speaker 2 (13:34):
Ben Bailey beat a man in the bathroom with the
comedy seller.
Speaker 6 (13:38):
I remember he's able to put He said, I'm gonna
put my boothly your chests would at.
Speaker 3 (13:41):
The comedy club.
Speaker 4 (13:43):
Every word of it.
Speaker 3 (13:46):
Problem.
Speaker 4 (13:49):
I love him, love problem.
Speaker 2 (13:51):
He's gonna what I I love.
Speaker 3 (13:56):
I can't straight up went out.
Speaker 2 (14:02):
Get him on.
Speaker 1 (14:05):
Him, Carl, I promise Carl, I get him a shipload
Instagram followers today, because for a chef, Instagram is everything.
Speaker 3 (14:17):
What is it again?
Speaker 2 (14:18):
Chef boar? Chef still okay? S A b O r
h E.
Speaker 3 (14:23):
I'm talking about you see the first sandwich? You know what?
I ain't.
Speaker 2 (14:29):
Stringing stringing, Sorry, no flavor.
Speaker 3 (14:33):
Everybody's so upset.
Speaker 4 (14:34):
You got to teach him how to cut up his food.
Speaker 7 (14:36):
I want to go through a fried chicken recipe.
Speaker 8 (14:38):
I bet you he can't be quiet for a second
without saying something crazy here comes.
Speaker 3 (14:45):
He's always whatever he's about to say. Yeah, he's got
his magic here too.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
Tell him what's up?
Speaker 10 (14:50):
Ken h You have always cooked me a wonderful steak, barbecue.
So I would like you to cook for me. And
when I go a Call's restaurant, pick up the check.
Speaker 2 (15:05):
You know, you know he doesn't any crabs, right, he
doesn't eat anything. He doesn't any crabs, he doesn't eat anything.
He sends me pictures and potatoes.
Speaker 3 (15:15):
He sends me pictures.
Speaker 7 (15:16):
He's like, would you eat this beautiful thing crabs? I'm like, yeah,
it's delicious.
Speaker 3 (15:20):
I watched him. They made a wonderful that's all.
Speaker 10 (15:24):
Yeah, that's Vic treated me to a nice steak dinner.
Speaker 3 (15:35):
About me and everybody? Everybody with him? Was there everybody
where You're going after Lewis.
Speaker 10 (15:40):
No, I was just starting a fact.
Speaker 5 (15:44):
I wasn't there.
Speaker 4 (15:46):
You treat him to a nice steak.
Speaker 3 (15:47):
Yeah, that's what he said.
Speaker 2 (15:48):
But g H is always very accommodating for.
Speaker 3 (15:53):
Treating me to a nice steak.
Speaker 10 (15:55):
Dude, will again call picked up the check when I
went to his restaurants.
Speaker 4 (15:59):
Always of white castles, aprotam come through.
Speaker 3 (16:04):
What got you?
Speaker 2 (16:06):
The wings?
Speaker 4 (16:07):
The best wings in the city, the best sliders. Think
a great slider.
Speaker 3 (16:12):
Had very good I got.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
He eats more bland than I. Steak and dry potatoes,
very plain vegetable.
Speaker 3 (16:22):
You should do a food show.
Speaker 7 (16:24):
You two should do a food show at a hospice.
Speaker 3 (16:29):
That was funny.
Speaker 2 (16:30):
That was funny.
Speaker 3 (16:31):
That was really funny.
Speaker 2 (16:32):
Let's make fried chicken together. That'll be a first video.
Speaker 3 (16:35):
We remember we were trying to do this. We're gonna
do big Mom's recipes.
Speaker 2 (16:39):
Not your hostel said, if I do my no, I
say it.
Speaker 3 (16:50):
On an air fryer.
Speaker 1 (16:52):
Huh.
Speaker 7 (16:52):
Air fryers are cool there, like apartments and stuff. I mean,
it's cool if you got nothing else to do, if
you want to just hack around, it's fine.
Speaker 10 (16:59):
Is it the same thing as a convection oven.
Speaker 3 (17:02):
No, it's it's different. It's it's it's different. It's like
a microwave and a fire together. Fat.
Speaker 7 (17:09):
I mean, it's just it's just it's new ways of
making less flavor.
Speaker 3 (17:15):
Thank you.
Speaker 1 (17:16):
More importantly, can I listen to your conversations?
Speaker 2 (17:21):
Can I listen to your conversations?
Speaker 3 (17:23):
What happened?
Speaker 2 (17:24):
You know they're listening to us through them all?
Speaker 3 (17:25):
That's right, bad lady from Trump?
Speaker 2 (17:27):
That lady Kelly and Conway. U s a b O
R chef on Instagram, bar bar chef.
Speaker 8 (17:38):
I'll put real pictures of food, or you can follow
Opie and watch them make string cheese out of tuna.
Speaker 1 (17:43):
Right, Thank you, hey man. My videos do real well
with the cooking. They get it, they get it to do,
don't say it to do things.
Speaker 2 (18:00):
The wrong way. We got people that work two jobs
soaked their ribs for eight hours. Show another way, who's
soaking ribs.
Speaker 10 (18:13):
A friend of mine told me that his secret to
good tuna fishes to break it up with your fingers.
Speaker 3 (18:18):
Bad friend.
Speaker 4 (18:19):
Oh really.
Speaker 3 (18:21):
Like the membrane.
Speaker 2 (18:22):
What's the best the best.
Speaker 3 (18:24):
Man at my wedding? You can that don't mean anything
in the kitchen.
Speaker 2 (18:29):
Let me tell you the best way to break up
to it is the back of a spoon.
Speaker 8 (18:33):
You dip it in a little bit of mayo and
keep a nice loop, and you press it up against
the bowl right and get flatten it out.
Speaker 7 (18:39):
And that way you crush the membranes in the little
celery in the onions and it gives them nice electra flavor.
Speaker 5 (18:45):
Welcome to the food networks, semid I walk.
Speaker 1 (18:54):
Into the kitchens, people start to fucking apologize the minute
I walk in.
Speaker 3 (18:57):
You got the back of a.
Speaker 5 (19:00):
Spook glube mayonnaise as lou all I got out of
that conversation.
Speaker 3 (19:09):
That's all you need. That's all you need, Mayo is
lou learn it, live it it, Mayo. May look at here,
just out to.
Speaker 4 (19:22):
Pocket life and let.
Speaker 8 (19:24):
Me tell you and I'll give you guys a little
tip to make the best grilled cheese sandwiches in the world.
Speaker 3 (19:29):
Okay, Mayo said, butter Man said butter all right, get here.
But yes, like on the inside and outside, it goes
on the grip.
Speaker 2 (19:43):
That's your problem and most people's problems. You've never had
a bad girl cheese, said Mayo.
Speaker 3 (19:48):
Girl cheese right, Oh my god, you know, but he's
probably had a hundred times in a dynam I'm going
to get another coffee. I cannot do it, dude, this
new black op.
Speaker 2 (20:06):
I'm only zero point one percent. Relax.
Speaker 3 (20:10):
It's your origin.
Speaker 2 (20:11):
Brother, enough to talk ship.
Speaker 4 (20:14):
The third floor for the building coming down?
Speaker 10 (20:17):
Brother, Yes, can I say something before we go? As
were on the subject of tuna fish. I had a
friend that stuttered and he went into the deli to
order a tuna fish sandwich because he stuttered, he said
to tuna and they gave him two sandwiches, and he
(20:38):
was so embarrassed he just paid for them.
Speaker 3 (20:41):
Oh, poor fellow. Okay, all right, all right, Well we've got.
Speaker 11 (20:46):
You got your brave man, I can't even swim. You
got your viabond here.
Speaker 2 (20:50):
You know you can't swim?
Speaker 3 (20:51):
No, it takes a lessons.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
Why can't you swim?
Speaker 3 (20:55):
I can, you know, like paddle like this? That's about it.
Speaker 11 (21:00):
My back legs are fucking horrific.
Speaker 12 (21:02):
Oh you gotta you gotta, you gotta loosen up a
little my back legs.
Speaker 1 (21:10):
You know what.
Speaker 5 (21:11):
He's got me man, one out of four got that.
Speaker 1 (21:17):
By the way, we all just listen like, yeah, I'll
tell you back your backs are we thank you, Mike.
Speaker 2 (21:23):
We all just let it go. Well no, yeah, yeah,
mine too. I can see where your back legs wherever
you say tadpool?
Speaker 1 (21:34):
Man?
Speaker 12 (21:35):
Wow, have you tried to swam?
Speaker 3 (21:39):
What happened?
Speaker 11 (21:40):
My brother in law has a pool. I'm afreid of
even diving to that. I mean, I just like walking
out slow.
Speaker 2 (21:44):
You should be afraid of div into that if you
can't swim.
Speaker 6 (21:47):
Sure.
Speaker 11 (21:48):
I was drowned though, and I was twenty eight. That's why,
because you know twenty eight a couple of times ocean cool.
You gotta because I want them to slide. I thought
it was just like, let's see what happens, right, I thought, Linda, like,
you know, four or five feet of water? Six feet
of water? Yeah, so I was starting to go down.
My friend, there's a big guy like me, jumped the
roller fucking clothes on.
Speaker 3 (22:09):
And pulled me right there.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
Wou who assumes that it's gonna be four feet of
water when they don't swim? Didn't you see the eight
ft on the side.
Speaker 11 (22:18):
I just calculations are pretty wrong.
Speaker 3 (22:22):
He didn't have his glasses. I only thought that the
eight like a full.
Speaker 1 (22:25):
Word tough one to say from drowning, by the way, Yeah, right,
that would be the brillant.
Speaker 11 (22:32):
Like right, my friend's a big guy.
Speaker 1 (22:34):
Just like.
Speaker 12 (22:35):
Were you scared?
Speaker 3 (22:37):
Terrified? Wow?
Speaker 11 (22:38):
I didn't want to I didn't want to go to
I was wondering when I was. When I was going
down for the third time, I was like, please Jesus Christ,
bring me back home or something. I don't want to
meet the other guy.
Speaker 3 (22:48):
When you're drowning, you pray to Jonah. That's what you're
supposed to do.
Speaker 12 (22:50):
Really, Yeah, yeah, Joe on the whale got to get
out there.
Speaker 3 (22:54):
Brother was holy man, I love this what it's amazing?
You love it?
Speaker 1 (23:03):
No?
Speaker 3 (23:03):
No, he said, he thinks, I think it's very cool.
Speaker 5 (23:06):
One of my idiot friends in high school had the
idea that we should all take lessons, and so we
started doing this when I was like seventeen eighteen years old.
Speaker 11 (23:13):
Now, but I might, I mean, like people mp from
planes the library on. You've never parachuted?
Speaker 2 (23:17):
Oh, I have never tell you?
Speaker 3 (23:19):
He trip manil Oh, come on, man, I.
Speaker 11 (23:26):
Jump ish it.
Speaker 3 (23:26):
I mean ten thousand feet all the way down to
the ground.
Speaker 2 (23:29):
Yeah, like twenty feet.
Speaker 4 (23:32):
Laid on your back legs. Ye, your back legs for that.
Speaker 5 (23:36):
I was telling somebody a possum fact yesterday, that my
brothers captured a possum, and uh. One kid in the
neighborhood said, the only thing you knew about the possums
was his older brother had told him that you could
shoot him in the head with a twenty two rifle
and the possum would still run for about four or
five hundred yards.
Speaker 3 (23:51):
Wow, put the gun right to his head, put the
bullet in its head, and he would run. So we
did this. We went through. Yes, it totally happened. We
lost him.
Speaker 5 (23:58):
He ran away from us where he got away from us?
And so with a bullet in his head, just going
You shot a Possumly I hadn't do it. My middle
mic did when he was fifteen. Somebody took the challenge.
Speaker 3 (24:08):
Yes, we took the challenge. There was like nine of
us in the neighborhood.
Speaker 5 (24:10):
We shot the possum in the head, and then as
it ran towards the woods to get away from us,
we all eight or nine. It was ran right along
behind it, you know, the possum right along behind us.
How gonna go hill for the idiot fun? There's nothing
to do in the neighborhood.
Speaker 1 (24:24):
Wow.
Speaker 2 (24:25):
I believe the possum thing, though, because didn't you have
a sister.
Speaker 3 (24:29):
No, and my mom was at work. We were unsupervised.
My older brother, who was like seventeen, he was in
charge of us. So I was like five, yeah, you know, yeah.
Speaker 2 (24:38):
Looking through whatever the hell you are.
Speaker 1 (24:39):
But I believe the possum thing because when I was
living out on Long Island, I rode over a possum
and it was one of those you know, and I'm like, oh,
that thing is so dead.
Speaker 2 (24:50):
And I looked through my rear view mirror and sure enough.
Speaker 1 (24:52):
That thing kept walking in the side of I'm like,
I just ran that thing over and it's.
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Still a lie.
Speaker 5 (24:58):
Oh yeah, they're just we need more, I guess, you know,
we need some letters us. We need to get them
in the military.
Speaker 12 (25:03):
Armadillas they call them Russian possible room.
Speaker 3 (25:06):
Yeah, those they're armored, they're.
Speaker 2 (25:08):
Ready, they were ready for war.
Speaker 13 (25:11):
The uh they had a lady, allegedly a breastfed one
by us, This black lady. Really you think it would
be a white woman. When I first heard the room,
I was like, yeah, naturally the white lady. She breastfed
an armadilla that had been sick.
Speaker 2 (25:26):
Oh good for her.
Speaker 3 (25:27):
Beautiful.
Speaker 12 (25:27):
Really, it's almost like a little grapes of wrath for
our neighborhood.
Speaker 2 (25:30):
That is a wonderful story. You need a good story
from your upbringing, because most of them are horrific.
Speaker 3 (25:34):
Man.
Speaker 5 (25:37):
Boo boo boo boo boo boo
Popular Podcasts
Stuff You Should Know
If you've ever wanted to know about champagne, satanism, the Stonewall Uprising, chaos theory, LSD, El Nino, true crime and Rosa Parks, then look no further. Josh and Chuck have you covered.
Crime Junkie
Does hearing about a true crime case always leave you scouring the internet for the truth behind the story? Dive into your next mystery with Crime Junkie. Every Monday, join your host Ashley Flowers as she unravels all the details of infamous and underreported true crime cases with her best friend Brit Prawat. From cold cases to missing persons and heroes in our community who seek justice, Crime Junkie is your destination for theories and stories you won’t hear anywhere else. Whether you're a seasoned true crime enthusiast or new to the genre, you'll find yourself on the edge of your seat awaiting a new episode every Monday. If you can never get enough true crime... Congratulations, you’ve found your people. Follow to join a community of Crime Junkies! Crime Junkie is presented by audiochuck Media Company.
NFL Daily with Gregg Rosenthal
Gregg Rosenthal and a rotating crew of elite NFL Media co-hosts, including Patrick Claybon, Colleen Wolfe, Steve Wyche, Nick Shook and Jourdan Rodrigue of The Athletic get you caught up daily on all the NFL news and analysis you need to be smarter and funnier than your friends.