August 22, 2025 • 28 mins
Discover "Our Miss Brooks Collection," a selection of the best episodes from the beloved radio comedy series. Experience the humorous and heartwarming tales of Miss Brooks and her school adventures. This collection is a must-listen for fans of classic radio comedies and nostalgic storytelling.
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
Pamali soup, Your Beauty Hope and Luster Cream shampoo for soft, glamorous,
caressible hair. Bring you Our Miss Brooks starring E Barden.
Our Miss Brooks teaches English at Madison Hives. We like
(00:22):
many other aromatically inclined people, she sent the object of
her affections, Madison's bashful biologist, Philip Boynton, an unsigned card
for Valentine's Day, and then she sat down to wait
for his reply.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
It wasn't that his reply was long in coming, it
just didn't come at all. Knowing mister Boynton, I wasn't
too surprised that he forgot about Valentine's Day, but I
was determined to change the locale of our next date.
For the past six weeks we had spent every Friday
afternoon at the zoo. Now I am definitely not anti animal,
(00:57):
but I am a school teacher and hints at the
spending three hours in the monkey house. I just can't
afford to buy taboo by the court. I went ruding
about it in the school cafeteria on Friday when Harriet
Conklan walked over. Mind if I sit down with you,
Miss Brooks. Not at all, Harriet, but don't you usually
have lunch with Walter Denton?
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Yes, I do, but he's managed with the basketball team,
you know, and he's giving the boys an extra skull practice.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Really, whose skull are they using today?
Speaker 3 (01:26):
I hope you're not expecting mister Boyton to have lunch
with you, miss Brooks. He told me he was eating
his lunch in the laboratory because he didn't want to
leave McDougall alone.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
No, don't tell me that Frog is sick again, not
actually sick, it's just spring fever or something.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
It's kind of fun to have lunch without any men
around anyway, don't you think so, miss Brooks?
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Well, yes and no, what do you mean? Yes and no.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
No, we haven't had a real woman to woman's talk
in a long time.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
No, Walter Denton is crazier about than ever. All I
have to do is whistle and he comes running.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
Really, it's the only way to train them. That's what
you want to try with mister Boynton.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
I have, But every time I whistle, he opens his
lunch box.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Sometimes his dog like affection and constant worship becomes absolutely cloying.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
Well, I wish mister Boyton would cloy me once in
a while. By the way, Harriet, when Walter takes you
out on a date, where do.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
You usually who all sorts of places, Miss Brooke, a
drive in the country, or for a long walk in
the park, for sometimes to go to a movie and
hold hands.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
Do you ever go to the zoo to zoo?
Speaker 3 (02:40):
Gosh, No, except when mister Boyton takes us there for
his monthly lecture.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
That's where I've got an edge on you kids. I
hear it every week. So mister Boyne takes you to
the movies once in a while, doesn't he.
Speaker 4 (02:51):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (02:51):
Yes, As a matter of fact, we went last week.
Was it romantic? Oh? Extremely? We stood in a crowd
of people behind a velvet rope for a while, and
then an usher said there's one down front. Yes, that
was the last I saw of mister Boynan for three hours.
I finally got a seat in the balcony.
Speaker 3 (03:12):
Surely that's the same, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
You couldn't hold hands at all, could you?
Speaker 1 (03:17):
Not?
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Even with the long gloves I was wearing. But about
those fridays in the monkey house, Harriet, I'm.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Surprised at you, Miss Brooks. You don't really let mister
Boynant take you to the monkey House every week?
Speaker 2 (03:28):
Do you No, I think it's the monkey House. It
can't be the taj Mahal with all those bananas. Well,
if it isn't, Madison hides Ferris.
Speaker 5 (03:38):
May I join this charming bevy of pulsitude?
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Why Walder? What a lovely speech? Yes you are a
delightful Charles Walder.
Speaker 3 (03:45):
But if you'll excuse me, miss Brooks, I'd like to
get my entree at the steam table.
Speaker 5 (03:48):
Oh can I be of service fair, Harriet? I'll gladly
fetch what you want?
Speaker 3 (03:52):
No, thank you, but if you'll sit up nicely when
I return, I'll pat you on that r R.
Speaker 5 (04:00):
Can I get you anything this brook.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
No thanks, Harriet, just bring back a roast beef bone
and a can of strong heart. Okay, Harriet. You know
I think it's wonderful the way you kids get along.
You're very fond of Harriet, aren't you?
Speaker 6 (04:12):
Walden?
Speaker 5 (04:13):
Very plus which Harriet's the principal's daughter, and I'm manager
of the basketball team. And there are things that I
can accomplish quicker If I can get to mister Conklin
without having to go through regulation channels all the time.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
What's good about getting to mister conkline so fast.
Speaker 5 (04:27):
Well, I like getting things done fast that need getting
done fast, like new jerseys, for instance.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
Like new jersey's what for instance? Not new jerseys? Anything?
New jerseys for the basketball team? Oh, we need them badly?
You do with that? The ones the team more in
their last game looked awfully fuzzy. They didn't wear any
in their last game. But I'm sure the new.
Speaker 5 (04:55):
Ones will come too. All I I'm taking Harriet out
on a date tonight, and I can bring it up
casually when I see the conkling at his house.
Speaker 2 (05:01):
I don't like to suggest a career for you, Walter,
but I have a feeling you're going to kiss an
awful lot of babies before you're much older.
Speaker 5 (05:07):
Oh, I could never be a politician. I'm too sincere,
how But why are we talking about me? You seem
to have a problem of your own on your mind,
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
Is it that obvious, Walter? I have been thinking about
mister Barton, but only in connection with getting him out
of the zoo and into my parlor. Watching me too tough?
What kind of a Webby is sinning? Webb? Look, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
At the risk of feeling like a trader to a
fellow male. I'll help your plot, mister Boynton's overthrow. But frankly,
I'm kind of hungry right now.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Then why don't you eat, Walter and we can finish
building the bomb after lunch.
Speaker 5 (05:41):
Oh, say, there's mister Leblanche, the new French teacher. Oh,
I don't know plenty about romance. He's a real frenchman.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
I'll call him over to dare Walter when I'm ready
to take my case to the United Nations. I'll let
you know. Besides, i've seen mister Leblanche on dates with
miss Enwright lately.
Speaker 5 (05:58):
So what miss Enright goes on dates to anybody? Gosh,
every time she sees mister Boynton she makes Google eyes
at him.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
That's not nice, Walderon. It's Enwright's eyes are always that way.
I mean, it's ethical.
Speaker 5 (06:11):
Is better than launchome, Miss Brooks. Oh, mister Leblase, Yes,
would you be kind enough to come over here a minute.
I'd like to talk to you about something very important.
Speaker 7 (06:20):
Well, you better talk to Walter because if bring my
coffee along and oh, I'll do you Miss Books.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
Fine, how do you, mister LeBlanc?
Speaker 8 (06:33):
What it?
Speaker 4 (06:33):
What did you want to talk to me about Walter's important.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
I'll see you later. Now that's what I call a
real subtle maneuver.
Speaker 8 (06:41):
He's a he's a funny boy.
Speaker 7 (06:43):
No, no, now, now he's just you and I miss books.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Eh, I'm afraid it's just you, mister leblink. I've got
to see MIT's the concluent about something.
Speaker 7 (06:55):
Mister Conkland, Please miss books. I think mister Conklin's a
fine principles but do you have to mention him during
the lunch period.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
You've got something there. I guess you can wait a while.
It's only a question of giving him my weekly dollar.
Speaker 8 (07:12):
Are you are him a weekly dollar for what?
Speaker 2 (07:14):
It's a long and grim story, but I think I
can boil it down to the repulsive essential. A couple
of weeks ago, I took an electric heater of his,
connected it mister Boynton's laboratory on an overloaded circuit, and
shorted the building, started a small fire, and ruined the heater.
Speaker 8 (07:28):
Why do this?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
I like sirens? Oh. I didn't do it purposely, mister LeBlanc.
It was an accident, one for which I'm paying at
the rate of a dollar a week, and today's dollar
day at Madison.
Speaker 8 (07:43):
Well that is too.
Speaker 7 (07:44):
Bad, miss Books, But it is not money that causes
you to look the way you do today.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Is there a sign on my forehead? How do I
look today?
Speaker 7 (07:52):
Well, there are only two things that can make a
woman have the look you have on your face. One
is an affair of the harp. The other is the
meat ball in this cafeteria. But neither of them is
in chobl Eh. I'm sure you haven't.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
Eaten those meatballs lately. Look, it's nice of you to
try and cheer me up. Mister LeBlanc.
Speaker 7 (08:14):
Please call me Paul, and I'm not going to cheer
you up. I'm trying to help you. First of all,
tell me this. Did you receive any messages on Valentine's Day?
Speaker 2 (08:23):
Oh, scad I got one from Zimmerman's Bakery, one from
the finance company, A lovely little card from Bertie's Bicycle
Shop in the shape of a pump. That one was,
and oh yes, a dandy little poem from sam our
neighborhood scissor sharpener. I think I remember that one. It went.
I've applied my grindstone to shears, both old and new,
(08:44):
but I never met a scissors one half as sharp
as you. Wasn't that a peachy sentiment for Valentine's Day?
Speaker 8 (08:52):
Quite amusing? Yes, but not to you.
Speaker 7 (08:54):
I'm afraid because you're not in love with Sam the
scissor or ball feed the bicycles.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
No, my problem is boyting the biology.
Speaker 8 (09:03):
Miss Works.
Speaker 7 (09:04):
Since we have taken me into your confidence, I would
like to make a suggestion. You must play how do
you say in this country? You must play difficult to acquire?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Difficult to acquire? Oh you mean hard to get?
Speaker 7 (09:20):
Now tell me tell me the truth. When mister Boynton
ask you for an engagement, do you ever say no?
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Well? No, but it isn't just because of mister Boyton.
I'd hate to disappoint four hundred monkeys. I haven't gone
out with him much lately at.
Speaker 8 (09:36):
All because he do not ask you.
Speaker 6 (09:38):
Well.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
I like that.
Speaker 7 (09:39):
I am glad Miss Works. There's one way to get
a man interested that never fails. You must make him
jell out.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
I've tried that, mister le Blanche, but he just doesn't
jell out very easily.
Speaker 4 (09:57):
Ah.
Speaker 8 (09:58):
Yes, but you've tried it only once. That is not enough.
Speaker 7 (10:01):
How do the big American advertising is work? A repetition
over and over the same thing. What did you hear
on the radio all the time.
Speaker 6 (10:09):
Smoke curbin, smoke curbet.
Speaker 4 (10:17):
If you were pretty soften enough, you know what happens.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Yeah, Jack gets pretty burned up. Now, missus Leblane, I'm
afraid mister Boynton is too wrapped up in a frog
to pay any attention to me.
Speaker 8 (10:28):
Oh, but of course I forget monsieur le frog.
Speaker 7 (10:32):
You know, in France we have a proverb luchiamo curled
dumb a parthon grenade translation. The way to a man's
heart is towards frog.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
I don't see what it happens.
Speaker 8 (10:48):
It's simple, really.
Speaker 7 (10:49):
Here you have a man with his little pete Mosieur
le frog, and here you have a woman with her pet,
Mademoiselle la frog. Now we convince the man that monsieurle
frog is lonesome. And where can this poor little frog
find companionship.
Speaker 8 (11:03):
With Mademoise a love frog? And when the two.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Little frogs go together, where are the man and.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
The woman pricing junior beds for tadpoles?
Speaker 7 (11:18):
No, no, miss Books, no, the man and the woman
are also together. Now you know, miss Books, what you
have to do to get mister boyn turns to be
a plastial dog.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
No, yes, I've got to build a better frog trap. Look,
mister la frog le Blanche, this idea is a little bit.
Speaker 5 (11:35):
I'm coming, miss brooks Ah, you look better already.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
Hello, Walter, Mister Leblanche is quite an idea, man. We
were just discussing a really fantastic scheme, not only fantastic,
but ridiculous and absurd. Walter. Yes, miss brook run down
to Peterson's pet shop and get me a female frog.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
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(12:23):
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Speaker 2 (13:24):
Well, I gave Walder my last dollar to buy a
female frog, and while he was out getting it, I
took advantage of a free period to visit mister Boynton
in his laboratory.
Speaker 4 (13:33):
Hello, mister Boyton, Hello Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
I just dropped in to say hello, mister Barton.
Speaker 8 (13:38):
Hello.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
Well to buy mister Barton.
Speaker 4 (13:42):
Oh, don't go yet. I've just been examining McDougall. You know,
my frog. He's got me a little worried way off
his feet, and we'll look at him. I should think
you guys pop up more than usual.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
What did you say?
Speaker 4 (13:59):
I said, don't you think his eyes pop out more
than usual?
Speaker 2 (14:02):
Yes? For a minute I thought he was Eddie Candor.
Speaker 9 (14:06):
II Mac.
Speaker 8 (14:07):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
Of course you know what's wrong with Mac, don't you?
Speaker 4 (14:10):
Uh no, miss Brooks, I don't.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
Well, it's getting very close to spring, and it's just,
after all, you raised him from a tadpole, and it's
only natural that you should still think of him as
your baby. But he's a big boy.
Speaker 4 (14:20):
Now, what do you mean, miss Brooks?
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Oh, just this, mister Boyton. Did it ever occur to
you that Mac gets lonesome all alone in that cage?
Speaker 4 (14:29):
Oh? I let him out of a cage quite often.
He hops all over the lab.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
But what good is that he hasn't got any friends here?
Speaker 4 (14:35):
I don't know. There are always a number of guinea
pigs around. Of course he doesn't pay much attention to them.
Speaker 2 (14:40):
Well, naturally, guinea pigs make fine friends for other guinea pigs.
A frog might crave a different kind of companionship, Or
what about me?
Speaker 4 (14:47):
I'm very close to mcgogle, I've done his constant companion.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
If I were a frog, I don't think i'd consider
that the ideal arrangement either. Now I think i'd want
something a little more frog like.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
What are you getting at this? Brook Look?
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Did you ever sit down and tell mcdoodle about the
birds and bees?
Speaker 4 (15:03):
What does he want with birds and bees? He won't
even make friends with guinea pigs.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
Well, let me put it this way, Missus Davis, my
landlady has a cat named Minerva. Now, around this time
of the year, Minerva keeps us both awake half the
night with an almost incessant yowling.
Speaker 4 (15:19):
Or if you tried giving her a saucer of milk.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
That's not what she's yowling about, mister bonho.
Speaker 4 (15:26):
Milks.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
Yes, I know, and believe me, if I thought it
would quiet her down, I'd give her an autograph picture
of Elsie the Cow. But it won't. She's yowling because
she's lonely.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
Well, Missus Brooks, I didn't know you were so aware
of these biological manifestations. Where did you learn all this?
Speaker 2 (15:44):
My Mama done told me. I found out about a
lot of things since I've acquired my pet frog. Pet
female frog, that is.
Speaker 4 (15:56):
You have a pet frog, Miss Brooks. What's her name?
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Her name? Uh? Milly Millie? Yes, from the picture of
the mating of Milly. Now she's offully cute too, right, you.
Speaker 4 (16:08):
Take the Max almost understood what you were talking about.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
Well, don't think for a minute he doesn't. What do
you say, Mac? Would you like to come over and
play with Milly this afternoon? Today? You are a man frog.
Speaker 4 (16:20):
Oh this is amazing, Miss Brooks. Looking you talk mind,
I'd like to ask you.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
If shine up your hope chest Milly, here it comes.
Speaker 4 (16:29):
I'd like to ask you, miss Brooks, how about a
double date, that is, if you if it isn't.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
Too much trouble, shall we say my place for tea
splendid Just bring a pogo stick in a deck of cards,
mister Barnham.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
A pulgo stick and cards.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Yes, while Mac and Milly played, gen you and I
can have a hopping contest.
Speaker 5 (16:49):
Excuse me? Could you come over here to the door
a minute, Miss Brooks. I've got to get to my
next class.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Oh, certainly, Walter, I'll just be a minute, mister Barnton,
did you get it, Walterer?
Speaker 5 (16:57):
Yes, in this paper, badness Brooks here, it's okay.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
I hope it works in this Brooks.
Speaker 5 (17:02):
Well, i'll see you in English.
Speaker 4 (17:05):
What's in the bag, miss Brooks?
Speaker 3 (17:07):
This bag?
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Oh, just a roasty sandwich Walter brought me.
Speaker 4 (17:11):
It's a pretty active one. Look out it. It's falling
out of the bag here he let me see that. Yeah,
I've got him. Oh, miss Brooks, he'll realize what you've
got here.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
Sure an frog. I didn't want to mention it in
front of Mac until we got home.
Speaker 4 (17:25):
But this is a male frog. You can always tell
because in the species demorphic notis from West Africa. There's
a very apparent demorphism and the dentisial. The male's being
provided with a series of large serrated teeth in the
lower jaw, which in the female is dentialss.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
Well, flop me with a wet lily pad. Excuse me,
it's the boy and I've got to be running along now,
Why miss Brooks, I've got to see a boy about
a frog.
Speaker 4 (17:51):
Here here, I'll put it back in the bag for you. Now,
just hold the top tighter and he won't get away again.
I still don't comprehend why you got this male frog.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Well, I didn't know how you and Google would react
to the idea of keeping Millie company, so I thought
i'd play safe and get this one too.
Speaker 4 (18:06):
I don't think Mac likes the idea very much.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
Don't be jealous, Mac, Let him live his own lives.
Speaker 4 (18:11):
Weeks better not come over this afternoon, Miss Brooks I'm
afraid it could only confuse Mac.
Speaker 2 (18:16):
Look, mister Boynton, I don't care if a frog wants
to play hard to get, but there's something i'd like
you to remember.
Speaker 4 (18:21):
What's that, Miss Brooks?
Speaker 2 (18:22):
Well, I don't want to sound too much like an
English teacher, but when one plays hard to get too often,
one sometimes don't get God. I'll just take this frog
into my room and see how water happened to make
such a I've been looking all over for you, Missus Davis.
What are you doing in the hallowed halls of Madison High?
Speaker 10 (18:44):
Well, I know how you've been waiting for a Valentine
cause for mister Boyne, and I just had to tell
you that all hope isn't lost.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
But today is Friday, Missus Davis.
Speaker 10 (18:52):
That's just it's conning some mail team this morning that
should have been delivered Monday a Valentine. No, a bill
from the gas company.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
Now that's the nicest bit of sentiments. And Sam's scissors.
Speaker 10 (19:04):
They say that if we don't tell it immediately, they'll
shut off the gas.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Just my luck with mister Boyhan coming over for tea.
It couldn't be the electric company promising to shut off all.
Speaker 10 (19:13):
The light no time, and I'm short some money, or
I wouldn't bother you in school like this. You know,
Minerva costs me a lot lately with her sticis diet.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
No. Just how much do you need, missus Davis?
Speaker 10 (19:26):
Real If you'll forgive a slang expression, one green bag
will do it.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
I just haven't have one on me. He's in this
bag here. Don't look so alarmed, Missus Davis. I'm not
cracking up completely. Look, just take this frog back to
Peterson's pet shop and they'll refund my dollar. I'll explain
why I bought the frog later.
Speaker 10 (19:44):
You don't have to explain anything to me, Commie. If
you want a frog for a pet, it's perfectly all right.
But why are you giving it.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Back to keep the gas on? For one thing. Besides,
it's a male frog, and I've got to have a female.
Speaker 10 (19:55):
Will you don't have to send any money for that.
I'll get you a female.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
Frog in the park. I never thought of that. I'd
certainly appreciated, missus Davis. Would you bring it back with
you after you've paid the gas bill?
Speaker 5 (20:05):
Pleasantly?
Speaker 10 (20:06):
Connie and I just knew that you'll be very happy together.
Speaker 2 (20:18):
And so class you were to have these compositions ready
by next Tuesday. That's the end of the period. Class
dismissed except Walter Denton's come up to my desk. Walter, Oh,
I'm glad you asked me, miss Brooks.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
I wanted to.
Speaker 5 (20:30):
Explain about that froud. You see, mister Peterson was out
to lunch when I got to the pet shop, so
I got you one out of the park pond.
Speaker 9 (20:36):
But was it all right?
Speaker 2 (20:37):
I mean, was she a girl? No, Walter, she was
a boy with big serrated teeth in her lower jaw.
And what about the dollar I gave you?
Speaker 5 (20:44):
Oh, here it is, miss Rooks. I didn't have time
to give it to you before.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
Thanks Walter. That'll be awesome. Now then I better get
over to mister Kunsman's office and make my payment on
that Heather.
Speaker 10 (20:53):
Oh, here, I am Connie hill O Walter, missus Davis.
Speaker 5 (20:56):
So i'm missus Davis.
Speaker 10 (20:58):
We will, But you think, Connie, mister Peterson didn't sell
Walter that frog at all, I know, Missus Davis, but
he said it was a very good specimen and traded
me a lovely female tolim. And instead of giving us
any money, he promised that when our frog becomes a husband,
we'll get the pick of uditors.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
I can hardly wait. But where's the female frog?
Speaker 4 (21:20):
Oh?
Speaker 10 (21:21):
I had that in the paper bag and it seems
very insecure. So I put the frog in the desk
across the hall.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Nobody saw me across the hall. But that's mister Complin's office.
Missus Davis, who wait right here? And if I'm not
back in five minutes, call the coroner.
Speaker 8 (21:39):
How what is it?
Speaker 1 (21:40):
Come in?
Speaker 8 (21:41):
Oh it's you, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 11 (21:43):
Please transact whatever business you have in this office in
a hurry. I've got an appointment with the doctor.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
The doctor. What's the matter, mister concorce.
Speaker 11 (21:49):
Oh, just to check up a lot of nonsense, if
you ask me. My wife's been telling him all sorts
of foolishness about the state of my nerves. To hear
her tell it, I've not only got the world's highest
blood pressure, but I'm jumped, me anxious overall, and I'm
(22:09):
ill tempered.
Speaker 8 (22:13):
Now what is it you want?
Speaker 2 (22:15):
I just want to give you a dollar towards the
heater I accidentally injured. Here.
Speaker 4 (22:19):
Oh, let's sit down for a minute.
Speaker 8 (22:20):
I'll give you a receipt.
Speaker 11 (22:21):
I've got a regular Board of Education receipt book around
here somewhere.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
But mister Conklin, you're a desk r.
Speaker 4 (22:27):
Miss Brooks, don't tell me where I keep my things.
Speaker 11 (22:31):
Of course, it's in the desk draw that Tina books
should be right over here, next to this bluff.
Speaker 8 (22:37):
That's funny. Oh here it is over by this frog. Hello,
little frog, and miss Brooks.
Speaker 4 (22:48):
It won't take a moment to get the receipt.
Speaker 6 (22:51):
Hello little frog, missus frog?
Speaker 1 (23:02):
Where did this monstrous Do you know anything about this
horrible creak?
Speaker 4 (23:06):
How did this?
Speaker 2 (23:08):
Mister Comlin, remember the world's highest blood pressure? Come to mind?
Speaker 4 (23:10):
There? What is this frog going in my desk?
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Calm down, mister Conklin. Our this isn't the only school
that's overcrowded.
Speaker 10 (23:25):
I thought you'd never get home from school, Connie. How
long did mister Conklin stand bowling you off?
Speaker 2 (23:30):
No, it seemed like ours, but actually it was only
a few minutes. You should have been there when mister
Conklin and Milly here faced each other across his death drawer.
Poor thing, her heart hasn't stopped beating yet.
Speaker 5 (23:41):
Neither as yours. Connie.
Speaker 10 (23:42):
You're as jumpy as Minerva.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Are you sure?
Speaker 10 (23:45):
Mister Boyton said he'd be over fifteen.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
Oh, definitely, Missus Davis. I told him all about how
lonely Minerva was and compared her to McDougall. So he's
bringing Mac over to meet Milly. It's the first time
in weeks we've had a date away from the zoo.
Speaker 4 (23:58):
That's mister.
Speaker 10 (23:59):
Now, go make the tea, Toney, and you receive him.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Oh all right, Missus Davis coming. Well, it's nice to
see you boys. Come in. Let's go into the living room.
Speaker 4 (24:11):
Thank you, Miss Brooks. Here's something for Milly. It's from McDougall.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
Oh, I'll open it for her. Well, wasn't that thoughtful
of mac Milly? Just what you needed. The clump of
wilted letters here, I'll put it in this little box
I keep her in.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
Ooh, I guess Mac wants to see what Milly looks like.
Speaker 2 (24:30):
Oh, of course, here, just hold him up. There we are.
Speaker 4 (24:33):
Ooh ooh, she likes him. But Miss Brooks, didn't you
say you had a cat on the premises?
Speaker 2 (24:44):
That's right, Minerva. She usually sleeps in the piano during
the day. Hear Minerva come out of the piano. Oh well,
she'll probably wake up in a little while. Sit down,
mister Barton.
Speaker 4 (24:53):
Oh before I do, don't you want to open this
big box for me?
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Well, what in the world can this be?
Speaker 4 (25:01):
It's a cat, Miss Brooks, and I brought him over
to keep Minerva company.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
Yeah, well, here comes Minerva.
Speaker 9 (25:11):
Now like each other too, Brooks, Miss Brooks, where you're going?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
You know where I'm going. I'll meet you by the
third monkey from the left, mars A.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Miss Brooks returns in just a moment.
Speaker 2 (25:41):
But first, dream Girl, dream Girl.
Speaker 8 (25:45):
Beautiful luster cream Girl.
Speaker 12 (25:48):
Tonight show him how much lovelier your hair can look
after a luster cream shampoo. Only luster cream brings you
kdo mathematic formula. Blend of secret ingredients plus gentle lenilon
give loveliness lather even in hardest water. Glamorize your hair
as you wash it. Luster Cream not a soap, not
a liquid, but a dainty cream shampoo. Lead's hair fragrantly clean,
(26:13):
free of loose dandriff, glistening with sheen, saft manageable. Give
new beauty to all hairdoes or permanent four ounce jar
one dollar smaller sizes either tubes or jars to night.
Try luster Cream shampoo and be.
Speaker 2 (26:29):
A dream girl, dream girl.
Speaker 8 (26:33):
Beautiful luster cream girl.
Speaker 4 (26:36):
You Oh, You're crowning glory to.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
A luster Cream shampoo.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
And now once again, here is our Miss brook Well.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
Mister Boynton finally took McDougall and his cat and left.
Missus Davis and I had dinner, and then we sat
down in the living room to spend a quiet evening.
Minerva went back to sleep, and everything was nice and peaceful,
and the phone rang Lie down the nerve It's not
for you, Hello, Hello, I'm sorry the nerve. It is
(27:13):
for you.
Speaker 4 (27:18):
Next week.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
Puting to another hour. Miss brook Show brought you by
Parmalic Soap, Your Beauty Hope and Luster Cream Tampoo for soft, glamorous,
caressible hair. Arms Brooks starring Eve Arden, is produced by
Larry Burns, written and directed by Al Lewis, with music
by Wilbur Hatch.
Speaker 12 (27:38):
Here's good shaving news.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
Three men out of every four can get more comfortable,
actually smoother shaves with Pamolive bushless shaving cream. This is
not just a claim, here's the proof. Twelve hundred ninety
seven men tried the palmolive brushless way to shave described
on the tube, and no matter how they shaved before,
three men out of every four got more comfortable, actually
(28:01):
smoother shave. Try palm Olive bushless yourself. See if you
don't get more comfortable, actually smoother shaves the proved palmolive
bushless way or mystery liberally sprinkled with the last.
Speaker 4 (28:13):
Listen to Mister and.
Speaker 1 (28:14):
Missus North, the exciting fun fact adventures of an amateur
detective and his beautiful wife Juni in Tuesday evenings over
most of these stations, and be with us again next
week at this time for another comedy episode of our
Miss Brooks. Bob Luman speaking to the CBS A Plump
Podcasts
Pamali soup, Your Beauty Hope and Luster Cream shampoo for soft, glamorous,
caressible hair. Bring you Our Miss Brooks starring E Barden.
Our Miss Brooks teaches English at Madison Hives. We like
(00:22):
many other aromatically inclined people, she sent the object of
her affections, Madison's bashful biologist, Philip Boynton, an unsigned card
for Valentine's Day, and then she sat down to wait
for his reply.
Speaker 2 (00:35):
It wasn't that his reply was long in coming, it
just didn't come at all. Knowing mister Boynton, I wasn't
too surprised that he forgot about Valentine's Day, but I
was determined to change the locale of our next date.
For the past six weeks we had spent every Friday
afternoon at the zoo. Now I am definitely not anti animal,
(00:57):
but I am a school teacher and hints at the
spending three hours in the monkey house. I just can't
afford to buy taboo by the court. I went ruding
about it in the school cafeteria on Friday when Harriet
Conklan walked over. Mind if I sit down with you,
Miss Brooks. Not at all, Harriet, but don't you usually
have lunch with Walter Denton?
Speaker 3 (01:17):
Yes, I do, but he's managed with the basketball team,
you know, and he's giving the boys an extra skull practice.
Speaker 2 (01:22):
Really, whose skull are they using today?
Speaker 3 (01:26):
I hope you're not expecting mister Boyton to have lunch
with you, miss Brooks. He told me he was eating
his lunch in the laboratory because he didn't want to
leave McDougall alone.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
No, don't tell me that Frog is sick again, not
actually sick, it's just spring fever or something.
Speaker 3 (01:40):
It's kind of fun to have lunch without any men
around anyway, don't you think so, miss Brooks?
Speaker 2 (01:44):
Well, yes and no, what do you mean? Yes and no.
Speaker 3 (01:48):
No, we haven't had a real woman to woman's talk
in a long time.
Speaker 2 (01:58):
No, Walter Denton is crazier about than ever. All I
have to do is whistle and he comes running.
Speaker 3 (02:03):
Really, it's the only way to train them. That's what
you want to try with mister Boynton.
Speaker 2 (02:07):
I have, But every time I whistle, he opens his
lunch box.
Speaker 3 (02:17):
Sometimes his dog like affection and constant worship becomes absolutely cloying.
Speaker 2 (02:22):
Well, I wish mister Boyton would cloy me once in
a while. By the way, Harriet, when Walter takes you
out on a date, where do.
Speaker 3 (02:28):
You usually who all sorts of places, Miss Brooke, a
drive in the country, or for a long walk in
the park, for sometimes to go to a movie and
hold hands.
Speaker 2 (02:37):
Do you ever go to the zoo to zoo?
Speaker 3 (02:40):
Gosh, No, except when mister Boyton takes us there for
his monthly lecture.
Speaker 2 (02:44):
That's where I've got an edge on you kids. I
hear it every week. So mister Boyne takes you to
the movies once in a while, doesn't he.
Speaker 4 (02:51):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (02:51):
Yes, As a matter of fact, we went last week.
Was it romantic? Oh? Extremely? We stood in a crowd
of people behind a velvet rope for a while, and
then an usher said there's one down front. Yes, that
was the last I saw of mister Boynan for three hours.
I finally got a seat in the balcony.
Speaker 3 (03:12):
Surely that's the same, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (03:14):
You couldn't hold hands at all, could you?
Speaker 1 (03:17):
Not?
Speaker 2 (03:17):
Even with the long gloves I was wearing. But about
those fridays in the monkey house, Harriet, I'm.
Speaker 3 (03:24):
Surprised at you, Miss Brooks. You don't really let mister
Boynant take you to the monkey House every week?
Speaker 2 (03:28):
Do you No, I think it's the monkey House. It
can't be the taj Mahal with all those bananas. Well,
if it isn't, Madison hides Ferris.
Speaker 5 (03:38):
May I join this charming bevy of pulsitude?
Speaker 2 (03:41):
Why Walder? What a lovely speech? Yes you are a
delightful Charles Walder.
Speaker 3 (03:45):
But if you'll excuse me, miss Brooks, I'd like to
get my entree at the steam table.
Speaker 5 (03:48):
Oh can I be of service fair, Harriet? I'll gladly
fetch what you want?
Speaker 3 (03:52):
No, thank you, but if you'll sit up nicely when
I return, I'll pat you on that r R.
Speaker 5 (04:00):
Can I get you anything this brook.
Speaker 2 (04:01):
No thanks, Harriet, just bring back a roast beef bone
and a can of strong heart. Okay, Harriet. You know
I think it's wonderful the way you kids get along.
You're very fond of Harriet, aren't you?
Speaker 6 (04:12):
Walden?
Speaker 5 (04:13):
Very plus which Harriet's the principal's daughter, and I'm manager
of the basketball team. And there are things that I
can accomplish quicker If I can get to mister Conklin
without having to go through regulation channels all the time.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
What's good about getting to mister conkline so fast.
Speaker 5 (04:27):
Well, I like getting things done fast that need getting
done fast, like new jerseys, for instance.
Speaker 2 (04:33):
Like new jersey's what for instance? Not new jerseys? Anything?
New jerseys for the basketball team? Oh, we need them badly?
You do with that? The ones the team more in
their last game looked awfully fuzzy. They didn't wear any
in their last game. But I'm sure the new.
Speaker 5 (04:55):
Ones will come too. All I I'm taking Harriet out
on a date tonight, and I can bring it up
casually when I see the conkling at his house.
Speaker 2 (05:01):
I don't like to suggest a career for you, Walter,
but I have a feeling you're going to kiss an
awful lot of babies before you're much older.
Speaker 5 (05:07):
Oh, I could never be a politician. I'm too sincere,
how But why are we talking about me? You seem
to have a problem of your own on your mind,
Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (05:17):
Is it that obvious, Walter? I have been thinking about
mister Barton, but only in connection with getting him out
of the zoo and into my parlor. Watching me too tough?
What kind of a Webby is sinning? Webb? Look, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 5 (05:29):
At the risk of feeling like a trader to a
fellow male. I'll help your plot, mister Boynton's overthrow. But frankly,
I'm kind of hungry right now.
Speaker 2 (05:37):
Then why don't you eat, Walter and we can finish
building the bomb after lunch.
Speaker 5 (05:41):
Oh, say, there's mister Leblanche, the new French teacher. Oh,
I don't know plenty about romance. He's a real frenchman.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
I'll call him over to dare Walter when I'm ready
to take my case to the United Nations. I'll let
you know. Besides, i've seen mister Leblanche on dates with
miss Enwright lately.
Speaker 5 (05:58):
So what miss Enright goes on dates to anybody? Gosh,
every time she sees mister Boynton she makes Google eyes
at him.
Speaker 2 (06:04):
That's not nice, Walderon. It's Enwright's eyes are always that way.
I mean, it's ethical.
Speaker 5 (06:11):
Is better than launchome, Miss Brooks. Oh, mister Leblase, Yes,
would you be kind enough to come over here a minute.
I'd like to talk to you about something very important.
Speaker 7 (06:20):
Well, you better talk to Walter because if bring my
coffee along and oh, I'll do you Miss Books.
Speaker 2 (06:28):
Fine, how do you, mister LeBlanc?
Speaker 8 (06:33):
What it?
Speaker 4 (06:33):
What did you want to talk to me about Walter's important.
Speaker 2 (06:36):
I'll see you later. Now that's what I call a
real subtle maneuver.
Speaker 8 (06:41):
He's a he's a funny boy.
Speaker 7 (06:43):
No, no, now, now he's just you and I miss books.
Speaker 2 (06:50):
Eh, I'm afraid it's just you, mister leblink. I've got
to see MIT's the concluent about something.
Speaker 7 (06:55):
Mister Conkland, Please miss books. I think mister Conklin's a
fine principles but do you have to mention him during
the lunch period.
Speaker 2 (07:07):
You've got something there. I guess you can wait a while.
It's only a question of giving him my weekly dollar.
Speaker 8 (07:12):
Are you are him a weekly dollar for what?
Speaker 2 (07:14):
It's a long and grim story, but I think I
can boil it down to the repulsive essential. A couple
of weeks ago, I took an electric heater of his,
connected it mister Boynton's laboratory on an overloaded circuit, and
shorted the building, started a small fire, and ruined the heater.
Speaker 8 (07:28):
Why do this?
Speaker 2 (07:30):
I like sirens? Oh. I didn't do it purposely, mister LeBlanc.
It was an accident, one for which I'm paying at
the rate of a dollar a week, and today's dollar
day at Madison.
Speaker 8 (07:43):
Well that is too.
Speaker 7 (07:44):
Bad, miss Books, But it is not money that causes
you to look the way you do today.
Speaker 2 (07:48):
Is there a sign on my forehead? How do I
look today?
Speaker 7 (07:52):
Well, there are only two things that can make a
woman have the look you have on your face. One
is an affair of the harp. The other is the
meat ball in this cafeteria. But neither of them is
in chobl Eh. I'm sure you haven't.
Speaker 2 (08:10):
Eaten those meatballs lately. Look, it's nice of you to
try and cheer me up. Mister LeBlanc.
Speaker 7 (08:14):
Please call me Paul, and I'm not going to cheer
you up. I'm trying to help you. First of all,
tell me this. Did you receive any messages on Valentine's Day?
Speaker 2 (08:23):
Oh, scad I got one from Zimmerman's Bakery, one from
the finance company, A lovely little card from Bertie's Bicycle
Shop in the shape of a pump. That one was,
and oh yes, a dandy little poem from sam our
neighborhood scissor sharpener. I think I remember that one. It went.
I've applied my grindstone to shears, both old and new,
(08:44):
but I never met a scissors one half as sharp
as you. Wasn't that a peachy sentiment for Valentine's Day?
Speaker 8 (08:52):
Quite amusing? Yes, but not to you.
Speaker 7 (08:54):
I'm afraid because you're not in love with Sam the
scissor or ball feed the bicycles.
Speaker 2 (08:59):
No, my problem is boyting the biology.
Speaker 8 (09:03):
Miss Works.
Speaker 7 (09:04):
Since we have taken me into your confidence, I would
like to make a suggestion. You must play how do
you say in this country? You must play difficult to acquire?
Speaker 2 (09:14):
Difficult to acquire? Oh you mean hard to get?
Speaker 7 (09:20):
Now tell me tell me the truth. When mister Boynton
ask you for an engagement, do you ever say no?
Speaker 2 (09:26):
Well? No, but it isn't just because of mister Boyton.
I'd hate to disappoint four hundred monkeys. I haven't gone
out with him much lately at.
Speaker 8 (09:36):
All because he do not ask you.
Speaker 6 (09:38):
Well.
Speaker 2 (09:38):
I like that.
Speaker 7 (09:39):
I am glad Miss Works. There's one way to get
a man interested that never fails. You must make him
jell out.
Speaker 2 (09:51):
I've tried that, mister le Blanche, but he just doesn't
jell out very easily.
Speaker 4 (09:57):
Ah.
Speaker 8 (09:58):
Yes, but you've tried it only once. That is not enough.
Speaker 7 (10:01):
How do the big American advertising is work? A repetition
over and over the same thing. What did you hear
on the radio all the time.
Speaker 6 (10:09):
Smoke curbin, smoke curbet.
Speaker 4 (10:17):
If you were pretty soften enough, you know what happens.
Speaker 2 (10:19):
Yeah, Jack gets pretty burned up. Now, missus Leblane, I'm
afraid mister Boynton is too wrapped up in a frog
to pay any attention to me.
Speaker 8 (10:28):
Oh, but of course I forget monsieur le frog.
Speaker 7 (10:32):
You know, in France we have a proverb luchiamo curled
dumb a parthon grenade translation. The way to a man's
heart is towards frog.
Speaker 2 (10:47):
I don't see what it happens.
Speaker 8 (10:48):
It's simple, really.
Speaker 7 (10:49):
Here you have a man with his little pete Mosieur
le frog, and here you have a woman with her pet,
Mademoiselle la frog. Now we convince the man that monsieurle
frog is lonesome. And where can this poor little frog
find companionship.
Speaker 8 (11:03):
With Mademoise a love frog? And when the two.
Speaker 1 (11:06):
Little frogs go together, where are the man and.
Speaker 2 (11:09):
The woman pricing junior beds for tadpoles?
Speaker 7 (11:18):
No, no, miss Books, no, the man and the woman
are also together. Now you know, miss Books, what you
have to do to get mister boyn turns to be
a plastial dog.
Speaker 2 (11:27):
No, yes, I've got to build a better frog trap. Look,
mister la frog le Blanche, this idea is a little bit.
Speaker 5 (11:35):
I'm coming, miss brooks Ah, you look better already.
Speaker 2 (11:38):
Hello, Walter, Mister Leblanche is quite an idea, man. We
were just discussing a really fantastic scheme, not only fantastic,
but ridiculous and absurd. Walter. Yes, miss brook run down
to Peterson's pet shop and get me a female frog.
Speaker 1 (12:02):
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Speaker 2 (13:24):
Well, I gave Walder my last dollar to buy a
female frog, and while he was out getting it, I
took advantage of a free period to visit mister Boynton
in his laboratory.
Speaker 4 (13:33):
Hello, mister Boyton, Hello Miss Brooks.
Speaker 2 (13:35):
I just dropped in to say hello, mister Barton.
Speaker 8 (13:38):
Hello.
Speaker 2 (13:40):
Well to buy mister Barton.
Speaker 4 (13:42):
Oh, don't go yet. I've just been examining McDougall. You know,
my frog. He's got me a little worried way off
his feet, and we'll look at him. I should think
you guys pop up more than usual.
Speaker 2 (13:58):
What did you say?
Speaker 4 (13:59):
I said, don't you think his eyes pop out more
than usual?
Speaker 2 (14:02):
Yes? For a minute I thought he was Eddie Candor.
Speaker 9 (14:06):
II Mac.
Speaker 8 (14:07):
Oh.
Speaker 2 (14:08):
Of course you know what's wrong with Mac, don't you?
Speaker 4 (14:10):
Uh no, miss Brooks, I don't.
Speaker 2 (14:11):
Well, it's getting very close to spring, and it's just,
after all, you raised him from a tadpole, and it's
only natural that you should still think of him as
your baby. But he's a big boy.
Speaker 4 (14:20):
Now, what do you mean, miss Brooks?
Speaker 2 (14:24):
Oh, just this, mister Boyton. Did it ever occur to
you that Mac gets lonesome all alone in that cage?
Speaker 4 (14:29):
Oh? I let him out of a cage quite often.
He hops all over the lab.
Speaker 2 (14:32):
But what good is that he hasn't got any friends here?
Speaker 4 (14:35):
I don't know. There are always a number of guinea
pigs around. Of course he doesn't pay much attention to them.
Speaker 2 (14:40):
Well, naturally, guinea pigs make fine friends for other guinea pigs.
A frog might crave a different kind of companionship, Or
what about me?
Speaker 4 (14:47):
I'm very close to mcgogle, I've done his constant companion.
Speaker 2 (14:50):
If I were a frog, I don't think i'd consider
that the ideal arrangement either. Now I think i'd want
something a little more frog like.
Speaker 4 (14:58):
What are you getting at this? Brook Look?
Speaker 2 (15:00):
Did you ever sit down and tell mcdoodle about the
birds and bees?
Speaker 4 (15:03):
What does he want with birds and bees? He won't
even make friends with guinea pigs.
Speaker 2 (15:09):
Well, let me put it this way, Missus Davis, my
landlady has a cat named Minerva. Now, around this time
of the year, Minerva keeps us both awake half the
night with an almost incessant yowling.
Speaker 4 (15:19):
Or if you tried giving her a saucer of milk.
Speaker 2 (15:21):
That's not what she's yowling about, mister bonho.
Speaker 4 (15:26):
Milks.
Speaker 2 (15:29):
Yes, I know, and believe me, if I thought it
would quiet her down, I'd give her an autograph picture
of Elsie the Cow. But it won't. She's yowling because
she's lonely.
Speaker 4 (15:38):
Well, Missus Brooks, I didn't know you were so aware
of these biological manifestations. Where did you learn all this?
Speaker 2 (15:44):
My Mama done told me. I found out about a
lot of things since I've acquired my pet frog. Pet
female frog, that is.
Speaker 4 (15:56):
You have a pet frog, Miss Brooks. What's her name?
Speaker 2 (15:59):
Her name? Uh? Milly Millie? Yes, from the picture of
the mating of Milly. Now she's offully cute too, right, you.
Speaker 4 (16:08):
Take the Max almost understood what you were talking about.
Speaker 2 (16:11):
Well, don't think for a minute he doesn't. What do
you say, Mac? Would you like to come over and
play with Milly this afternoon? Today? You are a man frog.
Speaker 4 (16:20):
Oh this is amazing, Miss Brooks. Looking you talk mind,
I'd like to ask you.
Speaker 2 (16:26):
If shine up your hope chest Milly, here it comes.
Speaker 4 (16:29):
I'd like to ask you, miss Brooks, how about a
double date, that is, if you if it isn't.
Speaker 2 (16:34):
Too much trouble, shall we say my place for tea
splendid Just bring a pogo stick in a deck of cards,
mister Barnham.
Speaker 4 (16:40):
A pulgo stick and cards.
Speaker 2 (16:42):
Yes, while Mac and Milly played, gen you and I
can have a hopping contest.
Speaker 5 (16:49):
Excuse me? Could you come over here to the door
a minute, Miss Brooks. I've got to get to my
next class.
Speaker 2 (16:53):
Oh, certainly, Walter, I'll just be a minute, mister Barnton,
did you get it, Walterer?
Speaker 5 (16:57):
Yes, in this paper, badness Brooks here, it's okay.
Speaker 2 (17:00):
I hope it works in this Brooks.
Speaker 5 (17:02):
Well, i'll see you in English.
Speaker 4 (17:05):
What's in the bag, miss Brooks?
Speaker 3 (17:07):
This bag?
Speaker 2 (17:07):
Oh, just a roasty sandwich Walter brought me.
Speaker 4 (17:11):
It's a pretty active one. Look out it. It's falling
out of the bag here he let me see that. Yeah,
I've got him. Oh, miss Brooks, he'll realize what you've
got here.
Speaker 2 (17:20):
Sure an frog. I didn't want to mention it in
front of Mac until we got home.
Speaker 4 (17:25):
But this is a male frog. You can always tell
because in the species demorphic notis from West Africa. There's
a very apparent demorphism and the dentisial. The male's being
provided with a series of large serrated teeth in the
lower jaw, which in the female is dentialss.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
Well, flop me with a wet lily pad. Excuse me,
it's the boy and I've got to be running along now,
Why miss Brooks, I've got to see a boy about
a frog.
Speaker 4 (17:51):
Here here, I'll put it back in the bag for you. Now,
just hold the top tighter and he won't get away again.
I still don't comprehend why you got this male frog.
Speaker 2 (17:58):
Well, I didn't know how you and Google would react
to the idea of keeping Millie company, so I thought
i'd play safe and get this one too.
Speaker 4 (18:06):
I don't think Mac likes the idea very much.
Speaker 2 (18:08):
Don't be jealous, Mac, Let him live his own lives.
Speaker 4 (18:11):
Weeks better not come over this afternoon, Miss Brooks I'm
afraid it could only confuse Mac.
Speaker 2 (18:16):
Look, mister Boynton, I don't care if a frog wants
to play hard to get, but there's something i'd like
you to remember.
Speaker 4 (18:21):
What's that, Miss Brooks?
Speaker 2 (18:22):
Well, I don't want to sound too much like an
English teacher, but when one plays hard to get too often,
one sometimes don't get God. I'll just take this frog
into my room and see how water happened to make
such a I've been looking all over for you, Missus Davis.
What are you doing in the hallowed halls of Madison High?
Speaker 10 (18:44):
Well, I know how you've been waiting for a Valentine
cause for mister Boyne, and I just had to tell
you that all hope isn't lost.
Speaker 2 (18:50):
But today is Friday, Missus Davis.
Speaker 10 (18:52):
That's just it's conning some mail team this morning that
should have been delivered Monday a Valentine. No, a bill
from the gas company.
Speaker 2 (19:00):
Now that's the nicest bit of sentiments. And Sam's scissors.
Speaker 10 (19:04):
They say that if we don't tell it immediately, they'll
shut off the gas.
Speaker 2 (19:08):
Just my luck with mister Boyhan coming over for tea.
It couldn't be the electric company promising to shut off all.
Speaker 10 (19:13):
The light no time, and I'm short some money, or
I wouldn't bother you in school like this. You know,
Minerva costs me a lot lately with her sticis diet.
Speaker 2 (19:24):
No. Just how much do you need, missus Davis?
Speaker 10 (19:26):
Real If you'll forgive a slang expression, one green bag
will do it.
Speaker 2 (19:31):
I just haven't have one on me. He's in this
bag here. Don't look so alarmed, Missus Davis. I'm not
cracking up completely. Look, just take this frog back to
Peterson's pet shop and they'll refund my dollar. I'll explain
why I bought the frog later.
Speaker 10 (19:44):
You don't have to explain anything to me, Commie. If
you want a frog for a pet, it's perfectly all right.
But why are you giving it.
Speaker 2 (19:50):
Back to keep the gas on? For one thing. Besides,
it's a male frog, and I've got to have a female.
Speaker 10 (19:55):
Will you don't have to send any money for that.
I'll get you a female.
Speaker 2 (19:58):
Frog in the park. I never thought of that. I'd
certainly appreciated, missus Davis. Would you bring it back with
you after you've paid the gas bill?
Speaker 5 (20:05):
Pleasantly?
Speaker 10 (20:06):
Connie and I just knew that you'll be very happy together.
Speaker 2 (20:18):
And so class you were to have these compositions ready
by next Tuesday. That's the end of the period. Class
dismissed except Walter Denton's come up to my desk. Walter, Oh,
I'm glad you asked me, miss Brooks.
Speaker 1 (20:29):
I wanted to.
Speaker 5 (20:30):
Explain about that froud. You see, mister Peterson was out
to lunch when I got to the pet shop, so
I got you one out of the park pond.
Speaker 9 (20:36):
But was it all right?
Speaker 2 (20:37):
I mean, was she a girl? No, Walter, she was
a boy with big serrated teeth in her lower jaw.
And what about the dollar I gave you?
Speaker 5 (20:44):
Oh, here it is, miss Rooks. I didn't have time
to give it to you before.
Speaker 2 (20:48):
Thanks Walter. That'll be awesome. Now then I better get
over to mister Kunsman's office and make my payment on
that Heather.
Speaker 10 (20:53):
Oh, here, I am Connie hill O Walter, missus Davis.
Speaker 5 (20:56):
So i'm missus Davis.
Speaker 10 (20:58):
We will, But you think, Connie, mister Peterson didn't sell
Walter that frog at all, I know, Missus Davis, but
he said it was a very good specimen and traded
me a lovely female tolim. And instead of giving us
any money, he promised that when our frog becomes a husband,
we'll get the pick of uditors.
Speaker 2 (21:17):
I can hardly wait. But where's the female frog?
Speaker 4 (21:20):
Oh?
Speaker 10 (21:21):
I had that in the paper bag and it seems
very insecure. So I put the frog in the desk
across the hall.
Speaker 2 (21:27):
Nobody saw me across the hall. But that's mister Complin's office.
Missus Davis, who wait right here? And if I'm not
back in five minutes, call the coroner.
Speaker 8 (21:39):
How what is it?
Speaker 1 (21:40):
Come in?
Speaker 8 (21:41):
Oh it's you, Miss Brooks.
Speaker 11 (21:43):
Please transact whatever business you have in this office in
a hurry. I've got an appointment with the doctor.
Speaker 2 (21:47):
The doctor. What's the matter, mister concorce.
Speaker 11 (21:49):
Oh, just to check up a lot of nonsense, if
you ask me. My wife's been telling him all sorts
of foolishness about the state of my nerves. To hear
her tell it, I've not only got the world's highest
blood pressure, but I'm jumped, me anxious overall, and I'm
(22:09):
ill tempered.
Speaker 8 (22:13):
Now what is it you want?
Speaker 2 (22:15):
I just want to give you a dollar towards the
heater I accidentally injured. Here.
Speaker 4 (22:19):
Oh, let's sit down for a minute.
Speaker 8 (22:20):
I'll give you a receipt.
Speaker 11 (22:21):
I've got a regular Board of Education receipt book around
here somewhere.
Speaker 2 (22:24):
But mister Conklin, you're a desk r.
Speaker 4 (22:27):
Miss Brooks, don't tell me where I keep my things.
Speaker 11 (22:31):
Of course, it's in the desk draw that Tina books
should be right over here, next to this bluff.
Speaker 8 (22:37):
That's funny. Oh here it is over by this frog. Hello,
little frog, and miss Brooks.
Speaker 4 (22:48):
It won't take a moment to get the receipt.
Speaker 6 (22:51):
Hello little frog, missus frog?
Speaker 1 (23:02):
Where did this monstrous Do you know anything about this
horrible creak?
Speaker 4 (23:06):
How did this?
Speaker 2 (23:08):
Mister Comlin, remember the world's highest blood pressure? Come to mind?
Speaker 4 (23:10):
There? What is this frog going in my desk?
Speaker 2 (23:13):
Calm down, mister Conklin. Our this isn't the only school
that's overcrowded.
Speaker 10 (23:25):
I thought you'd never get home from school, Connie. How
long did mister Conklin stand bowling you off?
Speaker 2 (23:30):
No, it seemed like ours, but actually it was only
a few minutes. You should have been there when mister
Conklin and Milly here faced each other across his death drawer.
Poor thing, her heart hasn't stopped beating yet.
Speaker 5 (23:41):
Neither as yours. Connie.
Speaker 10 (23:42):
You're as jumpy as Minerva.
Speaker 2 (23:44):
Are you sure?
Speaker 10 (23:45):
Mister Boyton said he'd be over fifteen.
Speaker 2 (23:47):
Oh, definitely, Missus Davis. I told him all about how
lonely Minerva was and compared her to McDougall. So he's
bringing Mac over to meet Milly. It's the first time
in weeks we've had a date away from the zoo.
Speaker 4 (23:58):
That's mister.
Speaker 10 (23:59):
Now, go make the tea, Toney, and you receive him.
Speaker 2 (24:02):
Oh all right, Missus Davis coming. Well, it's nice to
see you boys. Come in. Let's go into the living room.
Speaker 4 (24:11):
Thank you, Miss Brooks. Here's something for Milly. It's from McDougall.
Speaker 2 (24:16):
Oh, I'll open it for her. Well, wasn't that thoughtful
of mac Milly? Just what you needed. The clump of
wilted letters here, I'll put it in this little box
I keep her in.
Speaker 4 (24:27):
Ooh, I guess Mac wants to see what Milly looks like.
Speaker 2 (24:30):
Oh, of course, here, just hold him up. There we are.
Speaker 4 (24:33):
Ooh ooh, she likes him. But Miss Brooks, didn't you
say you had a cat on the premises?
Speaker 2 (24:44):
That's right, Minerva. She usually sleeps in the piano during
the day. Hear Minerva come out of the piano. Oh well,
she'll probably wake up in a little while. Sit down,
mister Barton.
Speaker 4 (24:53):
Oh before I do, don't you want to open this
big box for me?
Speaker 2 (24:57):
Well, what in the world can this be?
Speaker 4 (25:01):
It's a cat, Miss Brooks, and I brought him over
to keep Minerva company.
Speaker 2 (25:04):
Yeah, well, here comes Minerva.
Speaker 9 (25:11):
Now like each other too, Brooks, Miss Brooks, where you're going?
Speaker 2 (25:24):
You know where I'm going. I'll meet you by the
third monkey from the left, mars A.
Speaker 1 (25:39):
Miss Brooks returns in just a moment.
Speaker 2 (25:41):
But first, dream Girl, dream Girl.
Speaker 8 (25:45):
Beautiful luster cream Girl.
Speaker 12 (25:48):
Tonight show him how much lovelier your hair can look
after a luster cream shampoo. Only luster cream brings you
kdo mathematic formula. Blend of secret ingredients plus gentle lenilon
give loveliness lather even in hardest water. Glamorize your hair
as you wash it. Luster Cream not a soap, not
a liquid, but a dainty cream shampoo. Lead's hair fragrantly clean,
(26:13):
free of loose dandriff, glistening with sheen, saft manageable. Give
new beauty to all hairdoes or permanent four ounce jar
one dollar smaller sizes either tubes or jars to night.
Try luster Cream shampoo and be.
Speaker 2 (26:29):
A dream girl, dream girl.
Speaker 8 (26:33):
Beautiful luster cream girl.
Speaker 4 (26:36):
You Oh, You're crowning glory to.
Speaker 2 (26:40):
A luster Cream shampoo.
Speaker 1 (26:44):
And now once again, here is our Miss brook Well.
Speaker 2 (26:48):
Mister Boynton finally took McDougall and his cat and left.
Missus Davis and I had dinner, and then we sat
down in the living room to spend a quiet evening.
Minerva went back to sleep, and everything was nice and peaceful,
and the phone rang Lie down the nerve It's not
for you, Hello, Hello, I'm sorry the nerve. It is
(27:13):
for you.
Speaker 4 (27:18):
Next week.
Speaker 1 (27:19):
Puting to another hour. Miss brook Show brought you by
Parmalic Soap, Your Beauty Hope and Luster Cream Tampoo for soft, glamorous,
caressible hair. Arms Brooks starring Eve Arden, is produced by
Larry Burns, written and directed by Al Lewis, with music
by Wilbur Hatch.
Speaker 12 (27:38):
Here's good shaving news.
Speaker 1 (27:40):
Three men out of every four can get more comfortable,
actually smoother shaves with Pamolive bushless shaving cream. This is
not just a claim, here's the proof. Twelve hundred ninety
seven men tried the palmolive brushless way to shave described
on the tube, and no matter how they shaved before,
three men out of every four got more comfortable, actually
(28:01):
smoother shave. Try palm Olive bushless yourself. See if you
don't get more comfortable, actually smoother shaves the proved palmolive
bushless way or mystery liberally sprinkled with the last.
Speaker 4 (28:13):
Listen to Mister and.
Speaker 1 (28:14):
Missus North, the exciting fun fact adventures of an amateur
detective and his beautiful wife Juni in Tuesday evenings over
most of these stations, and be with us again next
week at this time for another comedy episode of our
Miss Brooks. Bob Luman speaking to the CBS A Plump
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