May 16, 2024 • 45 mins
Ariel Storm tags Thorn Ironquill in. The young professionals take a lunch break at a food truck. Amy Anne collects another piece of the puzzle.
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Episode Transcript
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(00:00):
Hey there. I hope you're havinga great week. Overworked and underplayed?
Is it not Safe for work?Dungeons and Dragons Actual Play podcast about a
group of incredible young professionals who findthemselves transported to a strangely familiar place full
of fantasy and magic. Se Youattached for episode description and content warnings.
Talk soon and thanks for listening.Wow, Bean Spitches, it's been a
(00:23):
while since I've seen you. Ohoh uh, sorry, wait, who
are you? Oh my god,I'm so sorry you don't know who I
am. I'm Goldie Haun. Iwork for Saul. Oh, hi,
Goldie, it's nice to meet you. Yes, I've been closely following your
case and I saw that Blanket andNemeo were arrested in the paper and there's
(00:45):
just like so much drama going on. How's the deposition going? O?
Man, it's been all day,hasn't it been, Richard, It has
been the longest day. Yeah,I'm sorry. Usually like they're pretty quick
when Saul's in the room. Well, I think that might be part of
the problem. I don't think Saulhas gotten a word in. Oh no,
(01:06):
that's the so unfortunate. Usually he'slike very sort of I wonder why
weird. Well, no, yougo ahead, Amyen, I think you
we're going to say the same thing. Well, I think Crystal she's just
so good. I think she reallymissed her calling as a lawyer. So
it seems like she's holding her ownin there, and it's just a lot
and we can't say anything, andyou know, and I'm nervous to like
(01:29):
do any doodling in there, andit's just it's just been a boring day.
Well, good for you all forsticking it out. It's been a
long day and you've been doing alot of listening, so hopefully you can
go and rest. Self care isvery important. Hey guys, I'm backlugs,
Oh, thank god. Greetings andwelcome to Overworked and Underplayed, a
(02:06):
D and D podcast for Young professionals, by young professionals. I'm your DM
or District Manager Alex Capps and today'sice breaker, what is your go to
karaoke song? What Up? It'syour boy? Marcel Hardy playing Richard Cox,
a human consultant turned halfling bard whoholy believes it's better to be lucky
(02:28):
than good, but it's best tobe both and Richard's go to karaoke song
is Thinking about You by Frank OceanSmooth. Hello, my name is Anelin
Hardy, and I played Taylor Jacobs, a centaur barbarian with a heart of
gold, and her favorite karaoke songis lose Control Ya Tony swims because she
(02:50):
is never out of control in herI'm just kidding now, we know that's
really not true, but how shethought of herself in her head just casually
try murder someone. Yeah, I'mtotally in control of my life. Everything
is fine. It was super fine. Hey everyone, my name's Katie and
I played Crystal the Drought Druid withher very own MLM Crystal Clarity, and
(03:13):
her karaoke song is that Don't ImpressMe Much by Shania Duain. That's perfect.
Also classic karaoke, Yeah, incredible. Hey, I'm Marjorie. I
play Amy and Amanda, a basic, b rough and teable human fighter with
a freshly minted dentistry degree. Favoritekaraoke song sweet Caroline. Very basic.
(03:39):
I just imagine that like the FamilyReunion, Like when Sweet Caroline gets on
and those non alcoholic seltzer start hittingjust right. Oh man, it gets
crazy in there. Oh yeah,so loud gravel boards get flipped, and
everybody's making their way to the towhat what should be a dance floor.
(04:01):
Yeah, it's fantastic, all right. And last, but not least,
I'm Tyler. I played the iticpaladin known as Bentley, and Bentley's favorite
karaoke song is anything by Taylor Swiftor Nickelback Bold nothing wrong with seeing a
little bit of rock star at karaoke. And once again, I am Alex
(04:24):
Capps. You're DM or District manager, and the DM's favorite song to karaoke
is the Sound of Silence. Okay, I'm the actual sound of silence or
the song the Sound of Silence.Either org depends on how bad the players
messed up his plans for the session. Hey listeners, this show is made
(05:03):
possible by the support of our awesomepatrons. In addition to a thank you
for their support, our patrons getan ad free listening experience and access to
exclusive bonus content. In the weeksbetween episodes, our patrons are getting an
extra show where we recap episodes andtalk about some of our favorite moments.
For more details about what you canget by supporting us on Patreon, check
(05:24):
us out at patreon dot com.Slash own up pod. All right,
So when we last left off,I believe you were still sitting in the
offices of Ironquill and Storm. Sowhen we come back in Crystal sitting across
the table, and so far you'dbeen dealing with Orial Storm. But now
(05:50):
Thorn Ironquill enters the picture and helooks directly at you, Crystal, and
he says, well, it appearsthat my client, Miss Crystal of the
Church of Clarity, may be makingan appearance if if she feels it's necessary.
But before she gets here, Ihave a few questions regarding the details
(06:17):
of this case. Now we haveseveral sworn statements by multiple people of the
fine city of Lavron that you havemade some very very damning accusations and assumptions
about things between ownership, familial status, identity. Do you deny all of
(06:46):
all of these allegations. I guessI don't understand what the accusations are.
Also, Yeah, if you couldjust listen out for me that be made.
Yeah, we'll start, We'll startfrom the top. As he looks
at Saul, and Saul's just kindof kind of looking through his notes seeing
if there's anything like this in hisnotes. To start with have you ever?
(07:13):
And then crystallin iron Quill went backand forth on a line of questioning
for six hours. Look, dude, this whole experience, in this weird
little world that we're in I'm notgonna lie, has been a whirlwind,
and you're asking for specific details,and quite honestly, I can't give them
to you. But if you wantto keep going down this rabbit hole of
trying to, you know, likepin me in a corner, that's fine.
(07:36):
Just know that I really don't remembermost of what's happened. My friends
even called me out for talking toa rock because I thought it was my
cell phone. So when you talkabout how clearly and how vividly things are
being remembered in this situation, justknow that my sanity's kind of walking on
an edge, not gonna lie mostdays. So I just want to go
(07:58):
home, and I want my shsit back, and I don't want to
deal with your bullshit laws. Socan we please just actually, you know
what, it'd be good if youcould just send us home. That would
be amazing, you see, thenyou wouldn't have to deal with me.
Saul looks very, very confused,and he's like wait, I didn't know
we were going with the insanity plea. We're not. It's kind of what
(08:22):
it sounds like. I want togo home. I want to go home.
Send us home, and you won'thave to deal with me. This
fucking church that's lying about all theirshit won't have to deal with us.
There will not be a lawsuit,there will be no shit to deal with,
no shit to shovel. So pleasejust send us home and I can
go back to my normal fucking lifewith my normal fucking career. Well maybe
(08:46):
not normal, because I was excellentand most of the things I did,
but still this place sucks and Iwant to go home. So if you
guys want to stand here and bitchabout it to me in my face and
the things that I've done and decisionsI've made under duress, that's cool,
but send me the fuck hont Soit's at this point during your tirade that
Ariol has returned with what appears tobe popcorn, and she's just sitting back,
(09:09):
smiling like listening and turns to Thornsays says, Oh, this is
going to be a walk in thepark. We're going to crush them.
Go ahead, go ahead, Hesays, Okay, I can see that
the instance at the bookstore may havestruck a nerve. We'll move on to
maybe more recent events. Did you, after being informed that the Crystal of
(09:39):
the Church of Clarity had a trademarkon the use of Clarity with a K
in business use case, did youattempt to use the Clarity trademark while selling
non Church of Clarity counterfeit products toa one Captain Montiac. Did I actually
(10:00):
sell them? Well, it sayshere you you gave them away with the
intention of recruiting new members to anutilization of what is officially known as the
Church of Clarity Vertical Fortune Ascendancy matrix. That's super cool, love her bag,
Like, that's awesome that she's doingthat. But I didn't sell anything,
(10:24):
so well, it says here thatyou're this one Captain Monteac now has
forty seven members and something called hisdownline. But do you know what the
downline is? Why don't you tellus what the downline is? No,
I want you to tell me whatthe downline is, because you're trying to
make a point that I'm doing somethingI wasn't supposed to be and selling products
(10:46):
when I didn't sell anything. Well, this Captain Monteac, when interviewed,
was informed us that by giving awaysamples of the product you had given him,
he had now recruited to date fortyseven members. That's amazing, what
a hustle. Good for him,good for me. Honestly, you haven't
(11:09):
been in contact with him, ActuallyI haven't. I'll go talk to him
after this. Okay, Well,you see his thorn now looks thoroughly confused.
He uh, he says, well, I believe that is all the
questions we had for you today.We'll be in touch about the trial.
(11:31):
Oh and just also be in touchabout sending us the buck home too.
That'd be good. That's not ourdepartment. Oh, it's not, because
all of your problems and all ofmy problems would go away. I just
went home. Just take a boatand go home. It's not that simple.
I think you know that. I'mverily. We're all very clearly fishes
out of water right here. Okay, we didn't just boat here. Our
(11:54):
ariel storm chimes and says, theplural of fish is fish. Oh god,
yourself, Taylor's gonna like reach acrossthe table and like hold on to
ariels like shirt and be like,what did you say? That wasn't how
(12:16):
you speak to a client. Sheuh takes her hand up and like grasps
your hand that's on her shirt,and she says, I said the plural
of fish is fish, and youknow that I went to something other than
Yes, the public joke makes areturn. I'm sorry, what did you
(12:41):
say, Aneline? I couldn't hearyou. Oh, I just said.
Taylor gently lays her on the groundlike a beautiful angel baby, and it's
like, I think we're done.I think we are. We'll be in
touch and uh so as you're allexiting. Uh, Saul turns, he
goes, I think that went well. I think I think you did great
(13:01):
in there. You've thoroughly established aalibi as being us being criminally insane.
This is wonderful. I'll take it. Honestly, I'm kind of tired of
this crap, like it's kind ofbeing like it's really frustrating to be chased
around for things that are already mine. I just really want to go home.
I think I've established that, andlike, I don't understand why everyone's
(13:22):
getting in my way, Like,can we just go home? This one?
Saul's like, just I mean,you can go to the docks and
try to go home. Crystal puttheir head in her hands and is just
like so frustrated, she just wantsto go home. Well, you know
what, Crystal, I guess wereally haven't even tried doing that getting on
(13:46):
a boat. You're right, Well, we dig it on that boat at
the beginning. It didn't do usany good. But I just went like
in a circle and came back.Though. That's true. What was a
boat ride for anyway? It wasour onboarding oh google, yeah, like
a literal. Yeah. But maybeI mean, maybe that's a good point.
Maybe we should see if there's sometype of I don't know, I
mean, that seems like it wouldbe pretty ridiculous at this stage in the
(14:09):
game. But I mean, doesnot have a good point. We've not
been to the dock. Oh mygod. Well, I guess that's that.
And whatever they want to do iswhatever they're going to do. It's
cool. I haven't made any moneyoff this shit, so it seems crazy
for them to try and sue mefor money I don't have. So yeah,
(14:30):
that's cool. I'm done. Soit's about that time. What you
thought was a bird up on topof one of the buildings, swoops down
and lands right in front of allyou guys, and it's a little mechanical
bird and it begins talking to you, and it said, oh hello everyone,
Hey, it's Fizzle Bang here.This is a pre recorded message,
(14:50):
so don't try to talk to me, but I need you to come see
me immediately. I have made adiscovery that is very putting it to you
getting where you want to be,if you know what I mean. I
didn't realize we were doing video gamemechanics style Crystal Play play Spiro when we
(15:15):
get back home. You'll understand.I wrote, Okay, all right,
is that kind of like a slinkyBentley just doesn't even acknowledge that. My
question was okay, okay, welldo we guys do we know where thiszle
thing is? Probably at his office, maybe, okay, okay. At
(15:37):
one point I know he was sortof trying to hide out somewhere. Was
that time ago? I don't know. I remember that too, but I've
been being sued. The mechanical birdgives you a map to find him doing
video game logic. You guys weremaking fun of me for talking to a
(15:58):
fucking rock, And here's a talkingto it. I just want you to
know it's not you see if thebird takes off and flying in the direction
that the map tells you to head, So we're following a bird now,
okay, Crystal's just like follows thebird. I guess you know what they
(16:23):
say? The bird is the word? All right? Is everyone going or
is there anything anybody else wants todo? I imagine Bentley is hungering and
would like to get food before hittingover there? Hey, Mark, Amy,
and you want to go get foodbefore we go to Fizzle Banks.
We were trapped in the courtroom fora while. I know I started.
I was about to chew my ownart off. Can we pick something up
(16:44):
on the way maybe because it seemslike maybe there's some street tacos or something?
Do you have funnel cakes here?Hey? DM? What street food
do they have? So? Uh, let's see one of y'all roll me
a D one hundred, so likethe percent, I'll die and tell me
what it comes up with. I'lllet Amy and she's got a bonus to
(17:04):
finding food. Is that true?I want it to be true. It
is a five? I don't know, Okay, five all right? So
five? Let's see here. Ohokay, So you see, as you're
(17:26):
heading that direction, you see whatappears to be a hot dog stand,
like it kind of looks like ahot dog stand. And you see Marjorie's
eyes right then when I said hotdog stand like, she was like,
we're here for it? So whatkind of weird regional hot dog vario.
(17:47):
As you get closer, you seewhat looks like a hot dog bun in
people's hands, but you're not surewhat it is that's in it. And
when you get up there, yousee that it appears to be a The
hot dog bun is very very dark, like almost black, and it appears
to be a squid or octopus tentaclethat's roasted and put in the bun with
(18:11):
some kind of what looks like almostlike coleslaw on top of it. I'm
down for this. I'll take twosin absolutely not forgive me one? Yeah,
sure, no problem. Anyone elsewon't one, I'll take one.
I guess Bentley pays, Like,what's the I don't know how much would
(18:33):
it be to get everyone one?So what I'm gonna say is, with
the money Bentley has, it's basicallynegligible to get everybody in like like one
or two. So how much cana hot dog cost? Twenty goals?
Okay, Mara, I'm sure thatcellar would be like, yes, if
they're like one silver five copper.Yeah, he pays them and everyone gets
(18:57):
whatever they want, and he's sayshe looks. He goes, would you
like pickle? Yeah? Up?He pulls out a jar and there's like
what looks like giant deal pickles.He goes, how many pickle? Uh?
How many? Would you suggest?How many are there? Uh?
This jar has about eight pickles init. Let's take the jar H for
(19:22):
jar two silver seven copper here,I got this one, Bentley, don't
worry about it. Yeah, okay, just good doing business. Yeah,
I think man thinks I'm alarmed thatthe pickles are more expensive than the protein
option. Right, it was theweird effect why they're out of season.
(19:51):
Sorry, Hey, is anybody allergicseafood here? We should probably check that
first. This would be a reallyshitty place to find out your allergic to
seafood. I don't allergic to selfishbecause Richard is actually allergic to actual shellfish.
(20:11):
Yeah wait, Richard is Richard isallergic to shellfish? Okay, Well,
how do you know that these tentaclesdidn't come out of a shell.
Richard. You know, I madethis the assumption that it was going to
be like our place. You're absolutelyright, and nothing is ever like where
we're from. And then now,which is very sad, that he's going
(20:33):
to get his hot dog this pickle. No, you can, you can.
You can eat the hot dog.Your worst case scenario, I just
heal you, all right. Thatsounds good. That's a good point.
That's a good ques. Again,does healing work on allergic reactions? I'm
sure less restoration works. Yeah.Lesser restoration is basically epinephrine in magic.
(20:56):
So he doesn't have to die first. Yeah, that's good. Okay,
that'd be great. Oh no,he's yet these I need to heal him
first. Let me kill him soI can resurrect. Anyways, So I'm
gonna say there's no weird effects fromthe thing. And that's actually I've got
a whole list of street food thati've I've seen on the internet, and
(21:18):
I put in a table. Uhthat's actually a thing they sell in South
Korea. Uh in soul you canget an octopus tentacle hot dog. So
that's like a real thing. Andthe black bun comes from squid Ink.
So Squiddink Rice is on point bythe way. Anyways, So you guys,
you guys, grab a you guys, grab a quick bite to eat
(21:40):
and have some delicious pickles. Areyou gonna do anything else before you get
to Fizzle Bangs? Oh? CanI go pick up my weapons that they
said would be ready? Sure?Yeah, all right, Bentley goes and
picks up his weapons. Okay,we don't have to We don't have to
do anything like. Yeah, thatwas easy enough. They were. They
were gift wrapped and everything for you. No need to take this offline,
(22:03):
overworked and underplayed. We'll circle backafter these messages. So you guys make
it back over to the corporate sectorwhere Fizzle Bang has set up his new
lab because he is in hiding fromsome people. And you find this kind
of decrepit looking building on the outsideand you see that the bird is perched
(22:26):
up on the roof of it.Oh, I'm not going in there,
No, but no, but Crystal. So to finish what I was saying,
I really feel like if you tooklike pickled juice and like distilled that
down, I think that would probablybe a really good addition to your line.
Okay, I'll consider it. Ido like pickle juice. We don't
(22:51):
know what Crystal just starts selling picklebacksand bulk not a bad idea, honestly
considering her. Apparently her current marketis cutthroats and sailors, so they probably
do have Yeah, probably do havescurvy. So there's probably so that's fine
to see. So it's not reallythe same thing. But I bet you
they do pickle things all the time. That's what I was just trying to
(23:15):
say, to try and convince youto like open your mind, because I
love pickle juice as I as sheyou know, chugs it. Oh god,
And we know Amyan is not pregnant, right, we know that we're
not. Oh no, it's justreally good, like electrolytes, you know,
it helps you get like a reallygood pomp in the gym. Has
(23:37):
anybody talked to you about the birdsand the beast? I mean, assuming
you have a big oh oh no, what did you say, the birds
and the beats? Yeah, that'swhat I said. I'm not having this
conversation. If you want to,like you could, Taylor would probably be
happy to talk to you about this. I'm not going in that weird ass
building until he's gonna have to comeoutside. We're not doing that. That's
(24:00):
where people go to die. Awesomecool Bentley could be the first Crystal.
I mean, I'll ride with you. I'll beat down anything that comes your
way. Don't worry. Okay,do you want to ride on my back?
No? I think uh Noker Taylor. But I just this place is
(24:26):
just fucked with me so much.I'm just kind of like wary of what
are we getting into next? TENLLike, I think what you're describing as
a trauma response, Yeah, Ithink you might be right. All right,
So while y'all are discussing trauma bondingout in front of the building,
(24:48):
Bentley, as you approach, youwiggle the door and it opens right up.
And as you step inside, yousee that the inside of the building
actually looks much more well kept thanthe outside, but that there's no lights
on inside. Hmm. Anyone anyonegot got some lights? Does anyone know
(25:11):
the light cantrip? I have dancinglights, so I'll cast it all right.
So as it lights up, youguys see, As the room illuminates,
you guys see papers, like thousandsof papers, just like stuck to
walls with strings connecting different sections.Oh yeah, we're gonna get murdered.
(25:33):
This is this is what are we? Why are we here? Hey,
buddy, you hear yeah? Youyou? You don't hear a response,
And you look at the back ofthe room, and you see who you
think is Fizzle Bang, slumped overhis desk, face first. Okay,
I've seen and listened to too muchtrue crime documentaries and podcasts. This is
(25:56):
he's dead. We need to leave, We need to leave, crystally run
over to him, all right.So you run over to him and he
is just completely slumped out on hisdesks with and you see what appears to
be a trail of red liquid comingfrom under his body. I fucking told
(26:17):
you, hey, hey, areyou okay? I try to lift him
up, or like move him sothat he's I can see his face okay.
So as you lift him up,he snaps back, goes, I'm
awake, I'm awake, Crystal.Crystal scream so loud and so high and
for so long. And it's atthis point you realize the red liquid on
(26:38):
his desk was ink from his hisquill, and he goes, oh my,
my, documents, my documents,and he says he's trying to like
clean it up as best he can. Sorry, I fell asleep. I
haven't slept in days, so Igot a little shut eye, So I
should be good for another And yousee he's counting with his fingers and he's
counting by two or three, threeor four days by the least. I've
(27:02):
made several discoveries while you've been gone. Have you had any luck finding the
crystal of varge? First of all, Bank, are you okay? I
am great. You need something.I was trying to make a joking noise
(27:29):
and it came out with choking ona pickle, just a waterboarded fizzle bang.
Yeah. It was like amy Anwas like putting the jar. I
was picturing Amy and putting the jarup the fizzle Bang's mouth. And she's
used to like her drinking stuff.And he's a little gnome. Uh he
(27:52):
says, oh, yeah, thatthat's very vinegary. Well, hopefully that
will help you. I mean,you gotta take listen. I am taking
care of my health. The goblinsthey introduced me to this new beverage called
boom Juice, and I've been drinkingnothing but that for days. It has
(28:15):
made me not to have to sleep. Uh. My bowel movements are a
little another question. But everything elseis fine. There's no negative side effects.
Okay, well, I mean I'mglad to see that you're not dead,
because it looked pretty scary coming inhere. So yeah, okay,
somebody else talked to him, please, hey, fizzle, nothing you see
(28:38):
as he was like staring out thewindows. Oh yes, yes, you're
here. Yes, you just beendrinking water. Also, you don't want
to get dehydrated. It has waterin it. I made it myself,
I know, but still drink somemore water. I have to drink water
in addition to that. But ithas water in it. That doesn't make
any sense, I know. Soit is liquid, so you are getting
(29:00):
some refreshment, but you should bedrinking more water as well. But anyway,
what were you going to say?Yes, yes, yes, I
have made several discoveries while you havebeen busy, uh, trying to track
down the next, the next toone of the uh the little items from
the from the the y. Haveyou had any luck? I think we
(29:23):
know where it is, but wehaven't been able to procure it yet.
Okay, So I have made abreakthrough. I've discovered some old texts speaking
I believe of where you come from, the place you come from? Is
(29:45):
it a place, a mystical landknown as eoth. Yes, it's actually
wonderful, yes, yes, yes, And he says, he flips through
this like dusty old book, andhe points it a picture of Earth like
you see, like a circle andlike the familiar outlines of continents and things.
(30:06):
It says, Okay, where doI start? Where do I start?
At the beginning? Fizzle, bang, at the beginning, at the
beginning. Okay, so there wasthis bang and the whole universe became a
thing. But this okay, okay, moving ahead, moving ahead, moving
ahead, Yes, yes, yes, okay. So there is a way
to travel from Earth to Ohsia.Yes, we're evidence of that. Yes,
(30:37):
yes, yes, it's a there'sthis uh how do you describe it?
There's this Think of it like asoup. Okay, think of like
you have a soup. Say youhave a a piece of vegetable, you
have another piece of vegetable, andyou you want to go from one vegetable
to another. Well, that stuffthe soup is this thing called the infinite.
(31:00):
It is this uh uh theoretical substancethat flows from one dimension to another,
and it appears that there is aa conduit for which one may travel
from your plane Earth to Osia.But as it stands, it is a
(31:25):
one way trip. Oh no,but but there was there were others who
came here before you, long longago. Hurt one of them. I'm
I'm unfamiliar with an Amelia Earhart,but I can. I can do more
research. And you see as hestarts writing that down and the triangle is
(31:52):
actually a portal here. There wasa group of people who came from your
world to hear I'm not sure whythey came here, but they were.
It appears they were looking for something, and once they realized that they were
basically trapped here, they they decidedto figure out a way to open up
(32:13):
another portal back home. They wereknown as the Seekers. They are the
ones who built the Orri and usedthe items that you were searching for.
Oh okay, But it appears thatas they were finishing construction of the Orri
(32:37):
that one of them corrupted by anevil being betrayed them, with a great
fight ensuing and one member of thegroup banishing him, while the others fled
and hid the items to prevent thisevil entity from reaching your world? Is
(32:59):
that the mask guy? You think? I don't know? Doctor dildo?
Doctor, he says. He writesdown doctor dildo. Doctor will do research
on this. Doctor. Don't lookup dildo. You can call him doctor
dipshit though. I think that probablyfits. Yeah, he says, he's
(33:21):
writing all of this down like heis, Uh, make searches on Oh,
there's no safe search in this world. Are you kidding me? He's
going to search dildo would end upat two girls, one cup. This
is Look, this is early twothousands Google. Okay, this is not
modern Google, he says. Itappears that that there are maybe some evil
(33:45):
forces at work trying to claim theitems so that, for whatever reason they
wish to reach your world. Itappears that the the head of the of
the Orchard may have been a championof one of these evil entities known as
(34:07):
Malfus. Oh is that short foranything? He says, No, Malfus
is He's known in the ancient textsas the fallen god of treachery. It's
not very trustworthy. But it doesappear that they were able to temporarily open
(34:29):
up a portal back to your world. It works. There is evidence to
suggest that he sees. He startswalking around the room, pointing at different
things he has up on the wall, and the strings connecting things. There
is evidence to say that all ofthis is actually going to work. Wow,
we're going to be able to sendyou home. But we have to
find these things, and we have. But the most important thing, you
(34:50):
have to make sure that they don'tfall into the wrong hands. These seekers
they never left. They stayed hereto ensure that the that the portals never
opened. I bet you that's whatdoctor d is. That's why he's so
so mad about it, Doctor douchebag. You see, as as Fizzle Bank
(35:15):
starts writing, good, how doyou spell that? He's a douche bag?
He says? Is that a familyname? Sure, he says.
Anyways, Uh, it's probably German, the he says, So, anyways,
(35:37):
do you have any questions for me? I'm sorry, I just kind
of threw all of this at youat one time, but I've I've been
furiously researching since we last met.And and uh and and this this,
Oh man, have you tried thisboom juice stuff? And you see,
as he picks up like a threeday old pot and he goes still good,
and he starts cast lesser restoration onhim. See if he falls as
(36:00):
uh you see as he kind oflike drops down in his chair and he
is definitely dozing, like like aboutto doze off. Yeah, I kind
of felt like he didn't really needany more of that boom juice. Do
they have aa in this world?He'll be fine, Let's just pour the
stuff out, gets the cup andpoorest on the ground. That's definitely worked
(36:22):
for addicts in the past. Fine. Yeah, you know, I gotta
be honest, this is like themost paladin thing that I think Bentley has
done this entire campaign. He's like, let's just let's just put you to
sleep and let's let's see if wecan fix this place up a little bit.
Anyways, Yeah, okay, cool. Is there anything we can do
(36:46):
to help him hide? Like,I don't know dis guys or anything like
that. So, uh, I'mjust gonna go and say, if you
asked him that he was still white, he would have told you that the
mechanical bird is almost like a keyfor his lock, and so he's pretty
(37:07):
well safe where he's at. He'sarguably the nicest person to us, so
nice, he always don't nice.I don't think it's really arguable. Sure,
hey, guys, what if MattDamon is a champion for one of
the other bad guys Richard's like thattracks I have been off about that guy
(37:32):
since day one, So yeah,I think we should be curious about him
one again. Yeah, because fiddleBan works for him, uh huh,
you know, and so he eventhough he probably has good intentions, he's
still his loyalties maybe you know,aligned with the baddies. To be fair,
(37:52):
fizzle Bang doesn't necessarily a word forhim. They just fund his research.
It's all work for him. Hejust pays his bills. Yeah,
I mean, you know, it'snot like colleges or professors at a college.
They don't really care about the teachingpart. They just do it so
(38:14):
they can get grant money. Yeah, but they're still employees. But either
way, I just wanted to pointthat out. Guys. If there's like
such a thing as champions and stuff, and you know, I'm a big
wrestling fan, and Doctor d hewears like that kind of like wrestler mask,
and he's talking about champions, andI feel like this is all kind
(38:36):
of coming together. So I thinkwe need masks, is what I'm saying.
I do think that we've disguised asright, you know, I think
that we've been pretty open about ourstuff. Can we look around and like
maybe do a little bit investigating onlike his sociopath board, and maybe we
(38:57):
can not have to go to FizzleBang every time to find these items,
Like maybe we can just you know, go through his notes and maybe we
can just you know, not haveto depend on him in case he is
so, you know, in caseMatt David is you, then I need
everyone to make an investigation check andhad twelve investigation in eighteen for Taylor,
(39:21):
flat sixteen for Bentley. Richard gota twenty three. Okay, so who
waits, somebody get a five?Crystal Crystal got She wasn't really paying attention
anyway. Yeah, so Crystal Crystallooked for like thirty seconds and got bored.
She's like, this is nerd shit, Like it's like trying to read
(39:42):
Greek mythology, right. I saythat as someone who loves mythology of all
cultures. But uh, anyways,you all find some i'd say fairly relevant
information, mostly about like the deitiesof the world Bentley. Mostly what you
capture is the origin of the dragonsand the fact that there are. You
(40:02):
know, you already knew about thefive dragons that were like the creators of
artifice, law, duty, logic, and writing. But then you learn
also of the five chromatic dragons ofthe dark lord Zahat. You also learn
of something of two pantheons, oneknown as the Arbitorious, which appear to
(40:23):
be the more lawful like good gods, and then the fallen, which are
the evil entities. The rest ofwhat y'all find is more or less what
he went over with you. Yousee some interesting diagrams of how the infinite
might work, even though it's theoreticalat this point, of like how you
(40:45):
might traverse it. But you dosee an entity known as Sunam and question
marks around her champion known as Crystalof the Church of Clarity, and then
as Amy Anne is going through allof this, you see, you know,
(41:06):
a lot of gibberish, a lotof things that don't make sense to
you. But you spot one thingthat you just can't shake. It's really
heavy. It is you spot inthe the sigils and things of the seekers,
you spot a symbol that you recognizeas the Amanda Family Dentistry like thimble.
(41:35):
Okay, so is it? Soit's just written on a page or
where where it's like a it's likean image of a signet ring, all
right, but it's the it's thesymbol that the Amanda Family Dentist office uses.
Do I have a signet ring thatmatches it? You don't, but
you've seen your father wear one.Okay, guys, guys, look look
(41:58):
this this is this is my thisis my dad's signal ring image and also
on all of our stationary This hasgotta be important. Do you have a
family member that disappeared? I don'tthink so. Dang I wish I could
call my mom or my brother andjust ask them if they you know,
they recall. They're much better thisstuff than I am. Dang it,
(42:22):
I can't recall. But I mean, we used to have like bigger family
reunions and they've kind of dwindled sinceGrandpappy passed away, and it's just been
It's just it could be maybe anextended family member, although I think I
would know everybody who knows the AmandaFamily Dentistry logo like Crystal is tired and
(42:45):
frustrated and feeling a little hopeless atthis point, and she's like, what
if we're just looping? Like whatif this has happened over and over and
over and over again and it's yours. What if we're just stuck here forever?
What if we never ever get togo home and we have to live
in this healthscape and we never everget to go home, and I never
(43:07):
get to go back to my downline, and I never ever get out of
this shithole of a place. Iwant to go home? What if this
is just happening over and over again, Richard, here's that? And he's
like, wait, no, wecan't lose Crystal. She was just on
the whole like we have to gethome trained. So he's like, well,
I think she said she. Ithink she said she didn't have a
ring, so it can't be her. So we're definitely like not looping,
So I think we're okay on that. And plus Fizzlebanks said that it was
(43:30):
like ancient times that people came hereand like, I mean we don't have
the technology though, Well that's whatI'm saying, Like it can't be us
at least, because like we don'thave we didn't have the technology or like
from our timeline, so like eitherin the past or in the future.
But I don't think it's us.I think we're okay. I think we
can get home. He said it'spossible. We just have to really hold
on to that. A gratitude todaykeeps the haters away, and that's why
(44:02):
we want to thank you for listeningto Overworked and Underplayed. You just heard
Alex Capps as our DM Anelin Hardyis Taylor Jacobs, Katie is Crystal two
point zero, Marjorie is Amy Ann, Marcel Hardy is Richard Cox, and
Tyler has Bent. We hope youassisted by Mars two edited the next episode.
You can help us to get theword out by rating, reviewing,
(44:24):
and subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts. You can also follow us on social
at own up pod That's own up, p o D, Subreddit, our
flight own up. Does Taylor needto be re shooed or anything? She
(45:09):
could probably go for, like itdepends would you like to wear shoes because
you could just get a trim,Like, how does that work? It's
a horse pedicure? How does thatwork? When she shifts back into human
form? Though she has really longTony. That's all I can consider.
Hey there. I hope you're havinga great week. Overworked and underplayed?
Is it not Safe for work?Dungeons and Dragons Actual Play podcast about a
group of incredible young professionals who findthemselves transported to a strangely familiar place full
of fantasy and magic. Se Youattached for episode description and content warnings.
Talk soon and thanks for listening.Wow, Bean Spitches, it's been a
(00:23):
while since I've seen you. Ohoh uh, sorry, wait, who
are you? Oh my god,I'm so sorry you don't know who I
am. I'm Goldie Haun. Iwork for Saul. Oh, hi,
Goldie, it's nice to meet you. Yes, I've been closely following your
case and I saw that Blanket andNemeo were arrested in the paper and there's
(00:45):
just like so much drama going on. How's the deposition going? O?
Man, it's been all day,hasn't it been, Richard, It has
been the longest day. Yeah,I'm sorry. Usually like they're pretty quick
when Saul's in the room. Well, I think that might be part of
the problem. I don't think Saulhas gotten a word in. Oh no,
(01:06):
that's the so unfortunate. Usually he'slike very sort of I wonder why
weird. Well, no, yougo ahead, Amyen, I think you
we're going to say the same thing. Well, I think Crystal she's just
so good. I think she reallymissed her calling as a lawyer. So
it seems like she's holding her ownin there, and it's just a lot
and we can't say anything, andyou know, and I'm nervous to like
(01:29):
do any doodling in there, andit's just it's just been a boring day.
Well, good for you all forsticking it out. It's been a
long day and you've been doing alot of listening, so hopefully you can
go and rest. Self care isvery important. Hey guys, I'm backlugs,
Oh, thank god. Greetings andwelcome to Overworked and Underplayed, a
(02:06):
D and D podcast for Young professionals, by young professionals. I'm your DM
or District Manager Alex Capps and today'sice breaker, what is your go to
karaoke song? What Up? It'syour boy? Marcel Hardy playing Richard Cox,
a human consultant turned halfling bard whoholy believes it's better to be lucky
(02:28):
than good, but it's best tobe both and Richard's go to karaoke song
is Thinking about You by Frank OceanSmooth. Hello, my name is Anelin
Hardy, and I played Taylor Jacobs, a centaur barbarian with a heart of
gold, and her favorite karaoke songis lose Control Ya Tony swims because she
(02:50):
is never out of control in herI'm just kidding now, we know that's
really not true, but how shethought of herself in her head just casually
try murder someone. Yeah, I'mtotally in control of my life. Everything
is fine. It was super fine. Hey everyone, my name's Katie and
I played Crystal the Drought Druid withher very own MLM Crystal Clarity, and
(03:13):
her karaoke song is that Don't ImpressMe Much by Shania Duain. That's perfect.
Also classic karaoke, Yeah, incredible. Hey, I'm Marjorie. I
play Amy and Amanda, a basic, b rough and teable human fighter with
a freshly minted dentistry degree. Favoritekaraoke song sweet Caroline. Very basic.
(03:39):
I just imagine that like the FamilyReunion, Like when Sweet Caroline gets on
and those non alcoholic seltzer start hittingjust right. Oh man, it gets
crazy in there. Oh yeah,so loud gravel boards get flipped, and
everybody's making their way to the towhat what should be a dance floor.
(04:01):
Yeah, it's fantastic, all right. And last, but not least,
I'm Tyler. I played the iticpaladin known as Bentley, and Bentley's favorite
karaoke song is anything by Taylor Swiftor Nickelback Bold nothing wrong with seeing a
little bit of rock star at karaoke. And once again, I am Alex
(04:24):
Capps. You're DM or District manager, and the DM's favorite song to karaoke
is the Sound of Silence. Okay, I'm the actual sound of silence or
the song the Sound of Silence.Either org depends on how bad the players
messed up his plans for the session. Hey listeners, this show is made
(05:03):
possible by the support of our awesomepatrons. In addition to a thank you
for their support, our patrons getan ad free listening experience and access to
exclusive bonus content. In the weeksbetween episodes, our patrons are getting an
extra show where we recap episodes andtalk about some of our favorite moments.
For more details about what you canget by supporting us on Patreon, check
(05:24):
us out at patreon dot com.Slash own up pod. All right,
So when we last left off,I believe you were still sitting in the
offices of Ironquill and Storm. Sowhen we come back in Crystal sitting across
the table, and so far you'dbeen dealing with Orial Storm. But now
(05:50):
Thorn Ironquill enters the picture and helooks directly at you, Crystal, and
he says, well, it appearsthat my client, Miss Crystal of the
Church of Clarity, may be makingan appearance if if she feels it's necessary.
But before she gets here, Ihave a few questions regarding the details
(06:17):
of this case. Now we haveseveral sworn statements by multiple people of the
fine city of Lavron that you havemade some very very damning accusations and assumptions
about things between ownership, familial status, identity. Do you deny all of
(06:46):
all of these allegations. I guessI don't understand what the accusations are.
Also, Yeah, if you couldjust listen out for me that be made.
Yeah, we'll start, We'll startfrom the top. As he looks
at Saul, and Saul's just kindof kind of looking through his notes seeing
if there's anything like this in hisnotes. To start with have you ever?
(07:13):
And then crystallin iron Quill went backand forth on a line of questioning
for six hours. Look, dude, this whole experience, in this weird
little world that we're in I'm notgonna lie, has been a whirlwind,
and you're asking for specific details,and quite honestly, I can't give them
to you. But if you wantto keep going down this rabbit hole of
trying to, you know, likepin me in a corner, that's fine.
(07:36):
Just know that I really don't remembermost of what's happened. My friends
even called me out for talking toa rock because I thought it was my
cell phone. So when you talkabout how clearly and how vividly things are
being remembered in this situation, justknow that my sanity's kind of walking on
an edge, not gonna lie mostdays. So I just want to go
(07:58):
home, and I want my shsit back, and I don't want to
deal with your bullshit laws. Socan we please just actually, you know
what, it'd be good if youcould just send us home. That would
be amazing, you see, thenyou wouldn't have to deal with me.
Saul looks very, very confused,and he's like wait, I didn't know
we were going with the insanity plea. We're not. It's kind of what
(08:22):
it sounds like. I want togo home. I want to go home.
Send us home, and you won'thave to deal with me. This
fucking church that's lying about all theirshit won't have to deal with us.
There will not be a lawsuit,there will be no shit to deal with,
no shit to shovel. So pleasejust send us home and I can
go back to my normal fucking lifewith my normal fucking career. Well maybe
(08:46):
not normal, because I was excellentand most of the things I did,
but still this place sucks and Iwant to go home. So if you
guys want to stand here and bitchabout it to me in my face and
the things that I've done and decisionsI've made under duress, that's cool,
but send me the fuck hont Soit's at this point during your tirade that
Ariol has returned with what appears tobe popcorn, and she's just sitting back,
(09:09):
smiling like listening and turns to Thornsays says, Oh, this is
going to be a walk in thepark. We're going to crush them.
Go ahead, go ahead, Hesays, Okay, I can see that
the instance at the bookstore may havestruck a nerve. We'll move on to
maybe more recent events. Did you, after being informed that the Crystal of
(09:39):
the Church of Clarity had a trademarkon the use of Clarity with a K
in business use case, did youattempt to use the Clarity trademark while selling
non Church of Clarity counterfeit products toa one Captain Montiac. Did I actually
(10:00):
sell them? Well, it sayshere you you gave them away with the
intention of recruiting new members to anutilization of what is officially known as the
Church of Clarity Vertical Fortune Ascendancy matrix. That's super cool, love her bag,
Like, that's awesome that she's doingthat. But I didn't sell anything,
(10:24):
so well, it says here thatyou're this one Captain Monteac now has
forty seven members and something called hisdownline. But do you know what the
downline is? Why don't you tellus what the downline is? No,
I want you to tell me whatthe downline is, because you're trying to
make a point that I'm doing somethingI wasn't supposed to be and selling products
(10:46):
when I didn't sell anything. Well, this Captain Monteac, when interviewed,
was informed us that by giving awaysamples of the product you had given him,
he had now recruited to date fortyseven members. That's amazing, what
a hustle. Good for him,good for me. Honestly, you haven't
(11:09):
been in contact with him, ActuallyI haven't. I'll go talk to him
after this. Okay, Well,you see his thorn now looks thoroughly confused.
He uh, he says, well, I believe that is all the
questions we had for you today.We'll be in touch about the trial.
(11:31):
Oh and just also be in touchabout sending us the buck home too.
That'd be good. That's not ourdepartment. Oh, it's not, because
all of your problems and all ofmy problems would go away. I just
went home. Just take a boatand go home. It's not that simple.
I think you know that. I'mverily. We're all very clearly fishes
out of water right here. Okay, we didn't just boat here. Our
(11:54):
ariel storm chimes and says, theplural of fish is fish. Oh god,
yourself, Taylor's gonna like reach acrossthe table and like hold on to
ariels like shirt and be like,what did you say? That wasn't how
(12:16):
you speak to a client. Sheuh takes her hand up and like grasps
your hand that's on her shirt,and she says, I said the plural
of fish is fish, and youknow that I went to something other than
Yes, the public joke makes areturn. I'm sorry, what did you
(12:41):
say, Aneline? I couldn't hearyou. Oh, I just said.
Taylor gently lays her on the groundlike a beautiful angel baby, and it's
like, I think we're done.I think we are. We'll be in
touch and uh so as you're allexiting. Uh, Saul turns, he
goes, I think that went well. I think I think you did great
(13:01):
in there. You've thoroughly established aalibi as being us being criminally insane.
This is wonderful. I'll take it. Honestly, I'm kind of tired of
this crap, like it's kind ofbeing like it's really frustrating to be chased
around for things that are already mine. I just really want to go home.
I think I've established that, andlike, I don't understand why everyone's
(13:22):
getting in my way, Like,can we just go home? This one?
Saul's like, just I mean,you can go to the docks and
try to go home. Crystal puttheir head in her hands and is just
like so frustrated, she just wantsto go home. Well, you know
what, Crystal, I guess wereally haven't even tried doing that getting on
(13:46):
a boat. You're right, Well, we dig it on that boat at
the beginning. It didn't do usany good. But I just went like
in a circle and came back.Though. That's true. What was a
boat ride for anyway? It wasour onboarding oh google, yeah, like
a literal. Yeah. But maybeI mean, maybe that's a good point.
Maybe we should see if there's sometype of I don't know, I
mean, that seems like it wouldbe pretty ridiculous at this stage in the
(14:09):
game. But I mean, doesnot have a good point. We've not
been to the dock. Oh mygod. Well, I guess that's that.
And whatever they want to do iswhatever they're going to do. It's
cool. I haven't made any moneyoff this shit, so it seems crazy
for them to try and sue mefor money I don't have. So yeah,
(14:30):
that's cool. I'm done. Soit's about that time. What you
thought was a bird up on topof one of the buildings, swoops down
and lands right in front of allyou guys, and it's a little mechanical
bird and it begins talking to you, and it said, oh hello everyone,
Hey, it's Fizzle Bang here.This is a pre recorded message,
(14:50):
so don't try to talk to me, but I need you to come see
me immediately. I have made adiscovery that is very putting it to you
getting where you want to be,if you know what I mean. I
didn't realize we were doing video gamemechanics style Crystal Play play Spiro when we
(15:15):
get back home. You'll understand.I wrote, Okay, all right,
is that kind of like a slinkyBentley just doesn't even acknowledge that. My
question was okay, okay, welldo we guys do we know where thiszle
thing is? Probably at his office, maybe, okay, okay. At
(15:37):
one point I know he was sortof trying to hide out somewhere. Was
that time ago? I don't know. I remember that too, but I've
been being sued. The mechanical birdgives you a map to find him doing
video game logic. You guys weremaking fun of me for talking to a
(15:58):
fucking rock, And here's a talkingto it. I just want you to
know it's not you see if thebird takes off and flying in the direction
that the map tells you to head, So we're following a bird now,
okay, Crystal's just like follows thebird. I guess you know what they
(16:23):
say? The bird is the word? All right? Is everyone going or
is there anything anybody else wants todo? I imagine Bentley is hungering and
would like to get food before hittingover there? Hey, Mark, Amy,
and you want to go get foodbefore we go to Fizzle Banks.
We were trapped in the courtroom fora while. I know I started.
I was about to chew my ownart off. Can we pick something up
(16:44):
on the way maybe because it seemslike maybe there's some street tacos or something?
Do you have funnel cakes here?Hey? DM? What street food
do they have? So? Uh, let's see one of y'all roll me
a D one hundred, so likethe percent, I'll die and tell me
what it comes up with. I'lllet Amy and she's got a bonus to
(17:04):
finding food. Is that true?I want it to be true. It
is a five? I don't know, Okay, five all right? So
five? Let's see here. Ohokay, So you see, as you're
(17:26):
heading that direction, you see whatappears to be a hot dog stand,
like it kind of looks like ahot dog stand. And you see Marjorie's
eyes right then when I said hotdog stand like, she was like,
we're here for it? So whatkind of weird regional hot dog vario.
(17:47):
As you get closer, you seewhat looks like a hot dog bun in
people's hands, but you're not surewhat it is that's in it. And
when you get up there, yousee that it appears to be a The
hot dog bun is very very dark, like almost black, and it appears
to be a squid or octopus tentaclethat's roasted and put in the bun with
(18:11):
some kind of what looks like almostlike coleslaw on top of it. I'm
down for this. I'll take twosin absolutely not forgive me one? Yeah,
sure, no problem. Anyone elsewon't one, I'll take one.
I guess Bentley pays, Like,what's the I don't know how much would
(18:33):
it be to get everyone one?So what I'm gonna say is, with
the money Bentley has, it's basicallynegligible to get everybody in like like one
or two. So how much cana hot dog cost? Twenty goals?
Okay, Mara, I'm sure thatcellar would be like, yes, if
they're like one silver five copper.Yeah, he pays them and everyone gets
(18:57):
whatever they want, and he's sayshe looks. He goes, would you
like pickle? Yeah? Up?He pulls out a jar and there's like
what looks like giant deal pickles.He goes, how many pickle? Uh?
How many? Would you suggest?How many are there? Uh?
This jar has about eight pickles init. Let's take the jar H for
(19:22):
jar two silver seven copper here,I got this one, Bentley, don't
worry about it. Yeah, okay, just good doing business. Yeah,
I think man thinks I'm alarmed thatthe pickles are more expensive than the protein
option. Right, it was theweird effect why they're out of season.
(19:51):
Sorry, Hey, is anybody allergicseafood here? We should probably check that
first. This would be a reallyshitty place to find out your allergic to
seafood. I don't allergic to selfishbecause Richard is actually allergic to actual shellfish.
(20:11):
Yeah wait, Richard is Richard isallergic to shellfish? Okay, Well,
how do you know that these tentaclesdidn't come out of a shell.
Richard. You know, I madethis the assumption that it was going to
be like our place. You're absolutelyright, and nothing is ever like where
we're from. And then now,which is very sad, that he's going
(20:33):
to get his hot dog this pickle. No, you can, you can.
You can eat the hot dog.Your worst case scenario, I just
heal you, all right. Thatsounds good. That's a good point.
That's a good ques. Again,does healing work on allergic reactions? I'm
sure less restoration works. Yeah.Lesser restoration is basically epinephrine in magic.
(20:56):
So he doesn't have to die first. Yeah, that's good. Okay,
that'd be great. Oh no,he's yet these I need to heal him
first. Let me kill him soI can resurrect. Anyways, So I'm
gonna say there's no weird effects fromthe thing. And that's actually I've got
a whole list of street food thati've I've seen on the internet, and
(21:18):
I put in a table. Uhthat's actually a thing they sell in South
Korea. Uh in soul you canget an octopus tentacle hot dog. So
that's like a real thing. Andthe black bun comes from squid Ink.
So Squiddink Rice is on point bythe way. Anyways, So you guys,
you guys, grab a you guys, grab a quick bite to eat
(21:40):
and have some delicious pickles. Areyou gonna do anything else before you get
to Fizzle Bangs? Oh? CanI go pick up my weapons that they
said would be ready? Sure?Yeah, all right, Bentley goes and
picks up his weapons. Okay,we don't have to We don't have to
do anything like. Yeah, thatwas easy enough. They were. They
were gift wrapped and everything for you. No need to take this offline,
(22:03):
overworked and underplayed. We'll circle backafter these messages. So you guys make
it back over to the corporate sectorwhere Fizzle Bang has set up his new
lab because he is in hiding fromsome people. And you find this kind
of decrepit looking building on the outsideand you see that the bird is perched
(22:26):
up on the roof of it.Oh, I'm not going in there,
No, but no, but Crystal. So to finish what I was saying,
I really feel like if you tooklike pickled juice and like distilled that
down, I think that would probablybe a really good addition to your line.
Okay, I'll consider it. Ido like pickle juice. We don't
(22:51):
know what Crystal just starts selling picklebacksand bulk not a bad idea, honestly
considering her. Apparently her current marketis cutthroats and sailors, so they probably
do have Yeah, probably do havescurvy. So there's probably so that's fine
to see. So it's not reallythe same thing. But I bet you
they do pickle things all the time. That's what I was just trying to
(23:15):
say, to try and convince youto like open your mind, because I
love pickle juice as I as sheyou know, chugs it. Oh god,
And we know Amyan is not pregnant, right, we know that we're
not. Oh no, it's justreally good, like electrolytes, you know,
it helps you get like a reallygood pomp in the gym. Has
(23:37):
anybody talked to you about the birdsand the beast? I mean, assuming
you have a big oh oh no, what did you say, the birds
and the beats? Yeah, that'swhat I said. I'm not having this
conversation. If you want to,like you could, Taylor would probably be
happy to talk to you about this. I'm not going in that weird ass
building until he's gonna have to comeoutside. We're not doing that. That's
(24:00):
where people go to die. Awesomecool Bentley could be the first Crystal.
I mean, I'll ride with you. I'll beat down anything that comes your
way. Don't worry. Okay,do you want to ride on my back?
No? I think uh Noker Taylor. But I just this place is
(24:26):
just fucked with me so much.I'm just kind of like wary of what
are we getting into next? TENLLike, I think what you're describing as
a trauma response, Yeah, Ithink you might be right. All right,
So while y'all are discussing trauma bondingout in front of the building,
(24:48):
Bentley, as you approach, youwiggle the door and it opens right up.
And as you step inside, yousee that the inside of the building
actually looks much more well kept thanthe outside, but that there's no lights
on inside. Hmm. Anyone anyonegot got some lights? Does anyone know
(25:11):
the light cantrip? I have dancinglights, so I'll cast it all right.
So as it lights up, youguys see, As the room illuminates,
you guys see papers, like thousandsof papers, just like stuck to
walls with strings connecting different sections.Oh yeah, we're gonna get murdered.
(25:33):
This is this is what are we? Why are we here? Hey,
buddy, you hear yeah? Youyou? You don't hear a response,
And you look at the back ofthe room, and you see who you
think is Fizzle Bang, slumped overhis desk, face first. Okay,
I've seen and listened to too muchtrue crime documentaries and podcasts. This is
(25:56):
he's dead. We need to leave, We need to leave, crystally run
over to him, all right.So you run over to him and he
is just completely slumped out on hisdesks with and you see what appears to
be a trail of red liquid comingfrom under his body. I fucking told
(26:17):
you, hey, hey, areyou okay? I try to lift him
up, or like move him sothat he's I can see his face okay.
So as you lift him up,he snaps back, goes, I'm
awake, I'm awake, Crystal.Crystal scream so loud and so high and
for so long. And it's atthis point you realize the red liquid on
(26:38):
his desk was ink from his hisquill, and he goes, oh my,
my, documents, my documents,and he says he's trying to like
clean it up as best he can. Sorry, I fell asleep. I
haven't slept in days, so Igot a little shut eye, So I
should be good for another And yousee he's counting with his fingers and he's
counting by two or three, threeor four days by the least. I've
(27:02):
made several discoveries while you've been gone. Have you had any luck finding the
crystal of varge? First of all, Bank, are you okay? I
am great. You need something.I was trying to make a joking noise
(27:29):
and it came out with choking ona pickle, just a waterboarded fizzle bang.
Yeah. It was like amy Anwas like putting the jar. I
was picturing Amy and putting the jarup the fizzle Bang's mouth. And she's
used to like her drinking stuff.And he's a little gnome. Uh he
(27:52):
says, oh, yeah, thatthat's very vinegary. Well, hopefully that
will help you. I mean,you gotta take listen. I am taking
care of my health. The goblinsthey introduced me to this new beverage called
boom Juice, and I've been drinkingnothing but that for days. It has
(28:15):
made me not to have to sleep. Uh. My bowel movements are a
little another question. But everything elseis fine. There's no negative side effects.
Okay, well, I mean I'mglad to see that you're not dead,
because it looked pretty scary coming inhere. So yeah, okay,
somebody else talked to him, please, hey, fizzle, nothing you see
(28:38):
as he was like staring out thewindows. Oh yes, yes, you're
here. Yes, you just beendrinking water. Also, you don't want
to get dehydrated. It has waterin it. I made it myself,
I know, but still drink somemore water. I have to drink water
in addition to that. But ithas water in it. That doesn't make
any sense, I know. Soit is liquid, so you are getting
(29:00):
some refreshment, but you should bedrinking more water as well. But anyway,
what were you going to say?Yes, yes, yes, I
have made several discoveries while you havebeen busy, uh, trying to track
down the next, the next toone of the uh the little items from
the from the the y. Haveyou had any luck? I think we
(29:23):
know where it is, but wehaven't been able to procure it yet.
Okay, So I have made abreakthrough. I've discovered some old texts speaking
I believe of where you come from, the place you come from? Is
(29:45):
it a place, a mystical landknown as eoth. Yes, it's actually
wonderful, yes, yes, yes, And he says, he flips through
this like dusty old book, andhe points it a picture of Earth like
you see, like a circle andlike the familiar outlines of continents and things.
(30:06):
It says, Okay, where doI start? Where do I start?
At the beginning? Fizzle, bang, at the beginning, at the
beginning. Okay, so there wasthis bang and the whole universe became a
thing. But this okay, okay, moving ahead, moving ahead, moving
ahead, Yes, yes, yes, okay. So there is a way
to travel from Earth to Ohsia.Yes, we're evidence of that. Yes,
(30:37):
yes, yes, it's a there'sthis uh how do you describe it?
There's this Think of it like asoup. Okay, think of like
you have a soup. Say youhave a a piece of vegetable, you
have another piece of vegetable, andyou you want to go from one vegetable
to another. Well, that stuffthe soup is this thing called the infinite.
(31:00):
It is this uh uh theoretical substancethat flows from one dimension to another,
and it appears that there is aa conduit for which one may travel
from your plane Earth to Osia.But as it stands, it is a
(31:25):
one way trip. Oh no,but but there was there were others who
came here before you, long longago. Hurt one of them. I'm
I'm unfamiliar with an Amelia Earhart,but I can. I can do more
research. And you see as hestarts writing that down and the triangle is
(31:52):
actually a portal here. There wasa group of people who came from your
world to hear I'm not sure whythey came here, but they were.
It appears they were looking for something, and once they realized that they were
basically trapped here, they they decidedto figure out a way to open up
(32:13):
another portal back home. They wereknown as the Seekers. They are the
ones who built the Orri and usedthe items that you were searching for.
Oh okay, But it appears thatas they were finishing construction of the Orri
(32:37):
that one of them corrupted by anevil being betrayed them, with a great
fight ensuing and one member of thegroup banishing him, while the others fled
and hid the items to prevent thisevil entity from reaching your world? Is
(32:59):
that the mask guy? You think? I don't know? Doctor dildo?
Doctor, he says. He writesdown doctor dildo. Doctor will do research
on this. Doctor. Don't lookup dildo. You can call him doctor
dipshit though. I think that probablyfits. Yeah, he says, he's
(33:21):
writing all of this down like heis, Uh, make searches on Oh,
there's no safe search in this world. Are you kidding me? He's
going to search dildo would end upat two girls, one cup. This
is Look, this is early twothousands Google. Okay, this is not
modern Google, he says. Itappears that that there are maybe some evil
(33:45):
forces at work trying to claim theitems so that, for whatever reason they
wish to reach your world. Itappears that the the head of the of
the Orchard may have been a championof one of these evil entities known as
(34:07):
Malfus. Oh is that short foranything? He says, No, Malfus
is He's known in the ancient textsas the fallen god of treachery. It's
not very trustworthy. But it doesappear that they were able to temporarily open
(34:29):
up a portal back to your world. It works. There is evidence to
suggest that he sees. He startswalking around the room, pointing at different
things he has up on the wall, and the strings connecting things. There
is evidence to say that all ofthis is actually going to work. Wow,
we're going to be able to sendyou home. But we have to
find these things, and we have. But the most important thing, you
(34:50):
have to make sure that they don'tfall into the wrong hands. These seekers
they never left. They stayed hereto ensure that the that the portals never
opened. I bet you that's whatdoctor d is. That's why he's so
so mad about it, Doctor douchebag. You see, as as Fizzle Bank
(35:15):
starts writing, good, how doyou spell that? He's a douche bag?
He says? Is that a familyname? Sure, he says.
Anyways, Uh, it's probably German, the he says, So, anyways,
(35:37):
do you have any questions for me? I'm sorry, I just kind
of threw all of this at youat one time, but I've I've been
furiously researching since we last met.And and uh and and this this,
Oh man, have you tried thisboom juice stuff? And you see,
as he picks up like a threeday old pot and he goes still good,
and he starts cast lesser restoration onhim. See if he falls as
(36:00):
uh you see as he kind oflike drops down in his chair and he
is definitely dozing, like like aboutto doze off. Yeah, I kind
of felt like he didn't really needany more of that boom juice. Do
they have aa in this world?He'll be fine, Let's just pour the
stuff out, gets the cup andpoorest on the ground. That's definitely worked
(36:22):
for addicts in the past. Fine. Yeah, you know, I gotta
be honest, this is like themost paladin thing that I think Bentley has
done this entire campaign. He's like, let's just let's just put you to
sleep and let's let's see if wecan fix this place up a little bit.
Anyways, Yeah, okay, cool. Is there anything we can do
(36:46):
to help him hide? Like,I don't know dis guys or anything like
that. So, uh, I'mjust gonna go and say, if you
asked him that he was still white, he would have told you that the
mechanical bird is almost like a keyfor his lock, and so he's pretty
(37:07):
well safe where he's at. He'sarguably the nicest person to us, so
nice, he always don't nice.I don't think it's really arguable. Sure,
hey, guys, what if MattDamon is a champion for one of
the other bad guys Richard's like thattracks I have been off about that guy
(37:32):
since day one, So yeah,I think we should be curious about him
one again. Yeah, because fiddleBan works for him, uh huh,
you know, and so he eventhough he probably has good intentions, he's
still his loyalties maybe you know,aligned with the baddies. To be fair,
(37:52):
fizzle Bang doesn't necessarily a word forhim. They just fund his research.
It's all work for him. Hejust pays his bills. Yeah,
I mean, you know, it'snot like colleges or professors at a college.
They don't really care about the teachingpart. They just do it so
(38:14):
they can get grant money. Yeah, but they're still employees. But either
way, I just wanted to pointthat out. Guys. If there's like
such a thing as champions and stuff, and you know, I'm a big
wrestling fan, and Doctor d hewears like that kind of like wrestler mask,
and he's talking about champions, andI feel like this is all kind
(38:36):
of coming together. So I thinkwe need masks, is what I'm saying.
I do think that we've disguised asright, you know, I think
that we've been pretty open about ourstuff. Can we look around and like
maybe do a little bit investigating onlike his sociopath board, and maybe we
(38:57):
can not have to go to FizzleBang every time to find these items,
Like maybe we can just you know, go through his notes and maybe we
can just you know, not haveto depend on him in case he is
so, you know, in caseMatt David is you, then I need
everyone to make an investigation check andhad twelve investigation in eighteen for Taylor,
(39:21):
flat sixteen for Bentley. Richard gota twenty three. Okay, so who
waits, somebody get a five?Crystal Crystal got She wasn't really paying attention
anyway. Yeah, so Crystal Crystallooked for like thirty seconds and got bored.
She's like, this is nerd shit, Like it's like trying to read
(39:42):
Greek mythology, right. I saythat as someone who loves mythology of all
cultures. But uh, anyways,you all find some i'd say fairly relevant
information, mostly about like the deitiesof the world Bentley. Mostly what you
capture is the origin of the dragonsand the fact that there are. You
(40:02):
know, you already knew about thefive dragons that were like the creators of
artifice, law, duty, logic, and writing. But then you learn
also of the five chromatic dragons ofthe dark lord Zahat. You also learn
of something of two pantheons, oneknown as the Arbitorious, which appear to
(40:23):
be the more lawful like good gods, and then the fallen, which are
the evil entities. The rest ofwhat y'all find is more or less what
he went over with you. Yousee some interesting diagrams of how the infinite
might work, even though it's theoreticalat this point, of like how you
(40:45):
might traverse it. But you dosee an entity known as Sunam and question
marks around her champion known as Crystalof the Church of Clarity, and then
as Amy Anne is going through allof this, you see, you know,
(41:06):
a lot of gibberish, a lotof things that don't make sense to
you. But you spot one thingthat you just can't shake. It's really
heavy. It is you spot inthe the sigils and things of the seekers,
you spot a symbol that you recognizeas the Amanda Family Dentistry like thimble.
(41:35):
Okay, so is it? Soit's just written on a page or
where where it's like a it's likean image of a signet ring, all
right, but it's the it's thesymbol that the Amanda Family Dentist office uses.
Do I have a signet ring thatmatches it? You don't, but
you've seen your father wear one.Okay, guys, guys, look look
(41:58):
this this is this is my thisis my dad's signal ring image and also
on all of our stationary This hasgotta be important. Do you have a
family member that disappeared? I don'tthink so. Dang I wish I could
call my mom or my brother andjust ask them if they you know,
they recall. They're much better thisstuff than I am. Dang it,
(42:22):
I can't recall. But I mean, we used to have like bigger family
reunions and they've kind of dwindled sinceGrandpappy passed away, and it's just been
It's just it could be maybe anextended family member, although I think I
would know everybody who knows the AmandaFamily Dentistry logo like Crystal is tired and
(42:45):
frustrated and feeling a little hopeless atthis point, and she's like, what
if we're just looping? Like whatif this has happened over and over and
over and over again and it's yours. What if we're just stuck here forever?
What if we never ever get togo home and we have to live
in this healthscape and we never everget to go home, and I never
(43:07):
get to go back to my downline, and I never ever get out of
this shithole of a place. Iwant to go home? What if this
is just happening over and over again, Richard, here's that? And he's
like, wait, no, wecan't lose Crystal. She was just on
the whole like we have to gethome trained. So he's like, well,
I think she said she. Ithink she said she didn't have a
ring, so it can't be her. So we're definitely like not looping,
So I think we're okay on that. And plus Fizzlebanks said that it was
(43:30):
like ancient times that people came hereand like, I mean we don't have
the technology though, Well that's whatI'm saying, Like it can't be us
at least, because like we don'thave we didn't have the technology or like
from our timeline, so like eitherin the past or in the future.
But I don't think it's us.I think we're okay. I think we
can get home. He said it'spossible. We just have to really hold
on to that. A gratitude todaykeeps the haters away, and that's why
(44:02):
we want to thank you for listeningto Overworked and Underplayed. You just heard
Alex Capps as our DM Anelin Hardyis Taylor Jacobs, Katie is Crystal two
point zero, Marjorie is Amy Ann, Marcel Hardy is Richard Cox, and
Tyler has Bent. We hope youassisted by Mars two edited the next episode.
You can help us to get theword out by rating, reviewing,
(44:24):
and subscribing wherever you listen to podcasts. You can also follow us on social
at own up pod That's own up, p o D, Subreddit, our
flight own up. Does Taylor needto be re shooed or anything? She
(45:09):
could probably go for, like itdepends would you like to wear shoes because
you could just get a trim,Like, how does that work? It's
a horse pedicure? How does thatwork? When she shifts back into human
form? Though she has really longTony. That's all I can consider.
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