April 22, 2025 • 23 mins
This wholesome family sitcom follows the daily lives of a married couple and their children, blending humor with relatable domestic situations. The show's charm lies in its portrayal of everyday family dynamics.
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Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:00):
The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet, presenting America's favorite young couple.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Ozzie Nelson and Harriett Hilliott.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
And now let's see what's going on in the Nelson family.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
Well, it's Sunday morning as we visit the Nelson household
at eighteen forty.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Seven Rogers Rode, Ozzy, Harriet, David and Rickey are seated
around the kitchen table and they've just about finished breakfast.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Oh, those hot tastes are great, Harriet.
Speaker 4 (00:37):
Thanks dear caf anymore.
Speaker 3 (00:39):
I couldn't eat another mouthful. Sure was a swell meal,
it wasn't it, Park.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
That certainly was, David.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
Nice day up today too, Yes, beautiful.
Speaker 5 (00:49):
Did you sleep all last night?
Speaker 2 (00:50):
Park?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Yes? I did, David. It's a good meal, it's a
nice day, and I slept fine. You can bring out
your report card.
Speaker 5 (00:57):
Now, see, Davis, I told you it wouldn't work. Here's
a report card, Pop. David said it was before on Pop,
but I told him Pop.
Speaker 3 (01:07):
Learned English, A spelling, A geography, A hey, this is
all right, arithmetic, A history. B. Well that's a darn
good report card, David.
Speaker 5 (01:23):
Thanks Pop.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
What'd you get Ozzie?
Speaker 3 (01:25):
Oh? E's except in history, oh, dear, and that's the
subject you've been helping him with. We got a B
in history. That's not so bad.
Speaker 5 (01:35):
Here's Ricky's card.
Speaker 4 (01:36):
He did pretty well too, Daddy, except for this one
right here, well.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
On satisfactory and courtesy. How did that happen, Ricky?
Speaker 4 (01:46):
I don't know, pop, or you must have done something
just sturdiest, dear. Don't you know what it was?
Speaker 2 (01:51):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Did you have any trouble with one of the other
kids at any time?
Speaker 5 (01:55):
Well, not exactly. One day I tried to beat Marianne
Mason to the program. I tripped her and she tell down.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
And you do know why you got unsatisfactory and courtesy?
Speaker 5 (02:05):
Yes, sir, I guess I forgot to say excuse me.
Speaker 3 (02:11):
That isn't the point, Ricky.
Speaker 4 (02:12):
Do you think it was polite to trip.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
A little girl?
Speaker 5 (02:15):
She wills, she drinks me lots of time.
Speaker 4 (02:17):
I know, dear, she can do it to you, but
a man doesn't do things like that to a lady.
Speaker 5 (02:22):
I don't think that's fair.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
I neither do I, Ricky. But that's the way they've
got it set up.
Speaker 4 (02:29):
Did the teacher say, why you only got to be
in history. David.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
Yeah, she said, it's because I can't remember dates.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
I can't remember dates.
Speaker 5 (02:36):
No, golly, how do they expect me to remember a
lot of things that happened before I was born.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
It's just like your father.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
He can't remember a lot of things that happened before
you were born either.
Speaker 5 (02:52):
Why we have to remembered dates?
Speaker 3 (02:53):
Anyway? That's good mental training. If you grow up, you'll
need a good memory for dates. Is that a good
thing to have you married? It is?
Speaker 4 (03:02):
You, see, David, Daddy wishes he learned.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
To remember Dave. Okay, just because I happened to overlook
our tenth anniversary, I.
Speaker 4 (03:08):
Wouldn't have been so bad if it hadn't been the
tenth one you'd overlook.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
You should have reminded me like you do for the
other occasion.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
Can I get on?
Speaker 5 (03:19):
Maybe it's something important?
Speaker 3 (03:20):
Yes, dear, go ahead? Anything more? Ougy, No, thanks, not
a thing.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
Ricky stopped pouring your milk in David's glass? Was it
anything important?
Speaker 3 (03:27):
David? Oh? Hi, Thorny, Good morning everybody. Oh Tony, have
a couple of coffee.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
Oh thanks, Harry, I just finished a tremendous practice.
Speaker 5 (03:36):
How about a half a glass of milk.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Thanks, Ricky, but I think you better finish it. Ju
I had just dropped in a moment to see you
about something odd.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
Well, if you too want to talk, maybe you better
go in the living room. I don't want to clear
away the dishes.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
Well, I can wait a few moments.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
If you want to help, Thornie, I wouldn't think of
keeping you waiting. Come on, let's go in here. Sit down.
He lacks a while. Toney, thanks, what's new?
Speaker 1 (04:01):
Well, for one thing, tomorrow's our wedding anniversary.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
Oh congratulations, how' do you remember? Well?
Speaker 1 (04:06):
I must admit that my wife helped out with a
few pretty broad hints.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
That always helps. Unfortunately, I seem to make especially of
forgetting anniversaries and birthdays. What makes it worse is that
Harriet always remembers him.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
That's an annoying thing about women.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
They never forget their wedding anniversary.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
And a man invariably does forget. I wonder why that is.
Speaker 1 (04:27):
As a fisherman, do you remember the day you caught
your first big fish?
Speaker 3 (04:31):
Why?
Speaker 1 (04:31):
Yes, I think the fish remembers.
Speaker 3 (04:40):
I see what you mean? For Nie, are you getting
Katherine a gift?
Speaker 2 (04:44):
Yeah, that's what I came to see you about.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
Oh well, I'm flat right now, but maybe I could
get Harry to give me an advance on my allowance.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
This is that I've got the gift right here in
my pocket.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
My problem is to keep Catherine from finding it until tomorrow.
Speaker 3 (04:56):
Oh, I see.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
You know how curious women are, especially Catherine. If it's
anywhere in the house, you'll find it.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
Why don't you keep it right in your pocket?
Speaker 2 (05:03):
Are you kidding? I gotta go to sleep sometime.
Speaker 3 (05:09):
Your wife must be pretty thorough.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
Thorough she can put a bloodhound of shade.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
Last year, I took her birthday present up to the attic,
pushed two trunks aside, opened the closet that had been
locked for two years, climbed up on a pile of newspapers,
and hid the gift in the far corner of the
closet under a pile.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
Of old books. Sounds pretty safe to me.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
I locked the closet door, pushed the trunks up against
the door, locked the attic door, came downstairs, washed my hands,
walked into the living room, and Catherine had her hat
and coat on and was on her way downtown to
exchange the gift.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
I thought you'd go too far, Thorny.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Would you keep this gift here until tomorrow?
Speaker 3 (05:50):
And sure I'd be glad to thanks?
Speaker 2 (05:51):
They got to go in down and see you later.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
Oh where?
Speaker 2 (05:53):
H Yeah? Don't tell Harriet about this, will you? I
want to keep it from Catherine.
Speaker 3 (05:57):
Oh I want if you don't want me to Thorny.
But she wouldn't tell We don't tell her anyway. Well okay,
but believe me, Harriet isn't like other women. She just
doesn't talk about things like this. No, do you happen to.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Have a patch on those blue striped shorts you're wearing
that your.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
Mother send you for Christmas? Yes? I do.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Don't tell Harry you about the brother?
Speaker 4 (06:21):
Hi?
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Pop? Oh?
Speaker 3 (06:22):
Hello, David?
Speaker 1 (06:23):
Say Pop?
Speaker 3 (06:24):
Come in?
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Man?
Speaker 5 (06:24):
Could get some ice cream after Sunday school week? Hey,
I'll bet that's my atomic green?
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Did this package just.
Speaker 5 (06:30):
Come in the mail phone?
Speaker 3 (06:31):
What's that?
Speaker 2 (06:32):
Hey?
Speaker 3 (06:32):
David? Put that down? That doesn't belong to you. I
didn't even know you sent the one sent for No. No, here,
give me the package, Dave. That's a gift for somebody.
Speaker 5 (06:40):
Oh who's the Forepop?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
I promised I wouldn't tell. It's a secret.
Speaker 5 (06:45):
I wonder when my atomic gring is gonna get you.
Speaker 3 (06:47):
M I wonder what this is Thorny got for his wife?
Sounds small and expensive?
Speaker 5 (06:57):
Hey, p what you got there?
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Pop?
Speaker 3 (07:00):
It's a present geesure top? No, no, it's it's not
for you, Ricky.
Speaker 5 (07:05):
Even my birthday next week?
Speaker 3 (07:07):
No, no, Ricky, your birthday isn't until May.
Speaker 5 (07:09):
He was I never get birthdays.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
You get as many birthdays as anybody else.
Speaker 5 (07:14):
How many birthdays have I had?
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Pop?
Speaker 3 (07:17):
Six?
Speaker 5 (07:17):
How many David had?
Speaker 3 (07:19):
Ten? See, Ricky, when you're ten years old like David is?
Now you have had ten birthdays too?
Speaker 5 (07:29):
How many will David is head by?
Speaker 2 (07:31):
Then?
Speaker 3 (07:31):
Let's drop it, Ricky's. Oh it's a big secret. It's
going to be a surprise. Now. Aren't you going to
be late for Sunday school?
Speaker 1 (07:40):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (07:40):
No, I got lots of time. What are you doing
with a prison top?
Speaker 3 (07:44):
I'm putting it right up here on the mantel.
Speaker 5 (07:46):
Why are you putting it up there?
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Pop?
Speaker 3 (07:48):
Just so a certain little boy doesn't go fooling around
with it?
Speaker 5 (07:51):
What little boy?
Speaker 3 (07:52):
A little boy about six and a half years old,
with blonde hair and a butch haircut.
Speaker 5 (07:56):
Is his first name?
Speaker 4 (07:57):
Ricky?
Speaker 3 (07:57):
I wouldn't be surprised.
Speaker 5 (07:59):
Yeah, you better put it up down.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
The Mattel'd you agree with me? I'll be upstairs if
anybody wants me, Ricky, I.
Speaker 5 (08:06):
Don't know why people always think they had to put stuff.
Speaker 4 (08:08):
But I can't reach.
Speaker 5 (08:09):
It, that's right, I can't weak it. Of course Pop
doesn't want me to reach it. But if I wanted
to reach it, I could just pull that chair over. Yes,
sound like I'm small, Rickie.
Speaker 4 (08:30):
What are you doing on that chair?
Speaker 3 (08:32):
And what's that you've got in your hand?
Speaker 5 (08:33):
It's a present?
Speaker 3 (08:34):
What was it for it?
Speaker 5 (08:35):
Pp wouldn't tell me he does a secret secret. Yeah,
he's saving it for a surprise.
Speaker 4 (08:41):
Well, then, I'm sure Daddy doesn't want you fooling around
with it.
Speaker 5 (08:44):
I guess not.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
And don't just think y'all to put it back. Don't
y'all to stick y'all to climb off the chair and
put the chair back where it was.
Speaker 3 (08:59):
Him?
Speaker 4 (09:03):
Hm, sounds small and expensive? Wonderful's inn it?
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Why don't you look? Oh No, that.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
Wouldn't be fair.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Why wouldn't it, Well, it just wouldn't, that's all.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
I'll bet if you left the package and Allie was here,
he'd teak.
Speaker 3 (09:25):
He would not, He wouldn't too. Go ahead, take a look.
Speaker 4 (09:31):
No, I shouldn't all go on?
Speaker 5 (09:34):
Just want to peak?
Speaker 4 (09:36):
No, go ahead, No, you're being childish about it. I
wonder what it can be.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Golly, the string is.
Speaker 4 (09:48):
Loose, looks like it'll come right off. H golly came off.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
Poor wrapping.
Speaker 4 (09:57):
I guess i'd better rewrap it. Here is a card
to my loving wife in memory of March the third.
Speaker 3 (10:05):
Hard weren't my tie, Ozzie?
Speaker 4 (10:08):
You shouldn't have done it, Dear, I'm sorry. I looked
at the card that I just couldn't visit.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
But Harriet, that's supposed to I've.
Speaker 4 (10:14):
Never dreamed you remember March the third?
Speaker 3 (10:18):
Oh, oh, yes, March the third.
Speaker 4 (10:22):
I was teaching you about not remembering anniversaries and birthdays
and things, all the while you had the surprise for
March the third.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
March the third, I mean, you know what I'd forget. Frankly,
I was sure you'd forgotten. Oh, darling, how could I
forget the anniversary of the day we I mean the day?
How could I forget March third?
Speaker 4 (10:50):
As long as I know you've got this, is it
all right? If I open it?
Speaker 3 (10:53):
Uh? Oh, Harriet, I think i'd better tell you. The
fact is it is beautiful. What is it I mean?
Speaker 1 (11:04):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (11:04):
This kind is lovely.
Speaker 4 (11:05):
Dear.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
Leave it to you to.
Speaker 4 (11:06):
Do something like this.
Speaker 3 (11:08):
Yeah, leave it to me.
Speaker 4 (11:11):
You're the dearest, sweetest, most thoughtful Marriott.
Speaker 3 (11:14):
Yes, Harriet, there's there's something I want to say to you.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
Yes, dear.
Speaker 3 (11:20):
Happy March third. Watch the third. Can't be our anniversary
that's in October. Can't be the day we became engaged.
That was in the summer. Harriet's birthday is in July.
My birthday is March twentieth. Why is that, Ricky? You
know that's what happened March the third? Hello, March their Hello.
(11:44):
You'll have to excuse me if I don't stop. I'm
in quite a hurry.
Speaker 5 (11:47):
Would you mind if I walk with you? Mister Nelson?
I got nothing to do.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
Not at all.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
But this is as far as I go. I'm just
stopping in here to see mister Thornbury.
Speaker 4 (11:54):
Oh.
Speaker 5 (11:54):
Oh, he isn't home, mister Nelson. I just thought I
leave with his golf club.
Speaker 3 (11:58):
Oh, for Pete's sake, anything wrong with Nelson? Yes, As
a matter of fact, I'm in a lot of trouble.
You're in trouble.
Speaker 4 (12:06):
Oh, how fascinating.
Speaker 5 (12:09):
What's wrong, mister Nelson.
Speaker 3 (12:10):
Well, mister Thornberry left his wife. Mister thorn left his please,
mister Thornberry left his wife's anniversary president at my house.
Missus Nelson found it. Read the card to my wife
in memory of March the third, and she thinks it's
for me. Oh, my goodness, Emmy lou, how much does
(12:32):
a gold pin about? This big cost hobby, this big.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
Seven hundred dollars?
Speaker 3 (12:37):
Holy? What are you gonna do? Mister Nelton? I don't know,
all right. It was so crazy about the pin. I
didn't have the heart to tell her. I didn't even
remember March the third. What's I don't know that either.
Racking my brain trying to remember your anniversary October the eighth.
I checked Harriet first July eighteenth. I checked that too.
Speaker 4 (12:57):
Goodness, mister Nelton, March thear It must be something important
in your life.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
See, I've been thinking all morning. First day I met
her January ninth, the first time I kissed her seven
o'clock January tenth, one year later.
Speaker 5 (13:18):
Why don't you just tell her the truth, mister Nelson,
that if missus Thorndery's gift, and you don't remember what
march their tands for.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Oh, I don't know.
Speaker 5 (13:25):
You'll get her another one. Tell her it was a
horrible mistake.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
Oh, I don't know her everything.
Speaker 4 (13:30):
She'll understand.
Speaker 5 (13:31):
She'll forgive you. When a woman loves a man, she
has a great capacity for forgiveness.
Speaker 4 (13:36):
So I'm sure missus Nelson will forgive you.
Speaker 3 (13:38):
I suppose after you've told her everything, Look into her eyes.
Speaker 5 (13:44):
Look at the expression on her face. Nothing is so
beautiful as the expression in a woman's eyes when she
forgives her husband for being a daughter.
Speaker 3 (13:55):
I could be so sure about this as you are.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
Oh, you can't be, mister Nelson.
Speaker 5 (13:59):
People should be absolutely honest with each other.
Speaker 3 (14:02):
Yes, I know, and it works.
Speaker 5 (14:03):
One of my girlfriends had a boyfriend and they had
a similar misunderstanding about a Valentine and I gave her.
Speaker 4 (14:09):
The same advice I'm giving you, and did it work?
Speaker 3 (14:13):
Did it work?
Speaker 5 (14:14):
Jeepers, you want to see my new boyfriend.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
Was emmy. That just proves your advice is not too good.
Speaker 5 (14:23):
But it just goes to show what the power of
suggestion can do.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
The power of suggestion. Hey, maybe that's an idea it is. Yeah,
maybe I could go to Harriet and sort of suggest
that the pin doesn't look good on her, or talk
about a better when i'd seen someplace, of course, and.
Speaker 5 (14:38):
Get it back from her and get her another Yeah,
Oh that's song.
Speaker 3 (14:40):
Simply super sammy dog win and try it out right now?
Speaker 5 (14:43):
Good luck, mister Nelson.
Speaker 3 (14:45):
I hope it all turns out just hyper hyper? What's that?
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (14:48):
Hyper's even more duper than super.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
Ozzie? What is it?
Speaker 2 (15:04):
Is?
Speaker 3 (15:04):
Something wrong? No? I was just looking at your pin there,
the new gold pin. Oh.
Speaker 4 (15:10):
I can't take my eyes off of it either. It's
so becoming.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
Oh do you really think so? But yet don't you?
Frankly there, now that I see it on you, I
really don't think it's your type at all? Why not? Well,
it clashes with what I don't know. It just clashes
in general. I think it's beautiful. I wish you'd let
me exchange it for something more different.
Speaker 4 (15:34):
Well, Azzie, I love this tin. Why should you exchange it?
Speaker 2 (15:38):
Will?
Speaker 3 (15:38):
I thought, maybe it's the wrong size or something wrong size,
or the wrong color. I read in a book once
where all the colors you wear should blend, and if
you're wearing any jewelie, like a gold pin, for instance,
it ought to match everything else.
Speaker 4 (15:52):
Well, Darling, a gold tin matches anything.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Then I read in another book that colors should be
in contrast.
Speaker 4 (16:02):
Look, it's the most beautiful tin I've ever seen. And besides,
you picked it out all by yourself, so I wouldn't
exchange it for the world.
Speaker 3 (16:09):
That's very sweet of you, Dear Harriet. You know I
was just thinking about March the third. Will you ever
forget March the third? No, dear, yes, sir, good old
March the third, Harriet. Uh huh oh, March the third?
(16:29):
What that day meant to us? Hun, dear, uh huh,
March the third. What do you think of when you
think of March the third? Harriet?
Speaker 4 (16:38):
Well, I think of how wonderful and glorious it was.
What do you think of Ojia?
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Same, Harriet. Let's reminisce about March the third. That No, No,
it'll be great fun. You tell me what you did
that day, and then I'll tell you what I did.
Speaker 4 (16:59):
You start, well, right after I got up, I heard
the phone ring. Yes, I answered the phone, and it
was you. Yes, Now it's your turn.
Speaker 3 (17:06):
I I just remembered. I've got to go see Thornberry.
It's very important. Hello, Thornie, What are you doing here
(17:30):
in front of my house waiting for you? I've been
waiting for hours.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
Oh, I start playing golf and then the boys and
I got the chewing the fat in the locker room.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
I didn't know you were waiting for me.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
Well, I don't mind you're playing golf, but hanging around
the locker room when I'm sitting here waiting for you,
never knowing when you're going to get home.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
I'm sorry, dear, I mean, there's what's wrong?
Speaker 3 (17:57):
Well about that gold pen you left at my house?
Speaker 2 (17:59):
I don't I don't need it until tomorrow. That's why
I left it at jaw house, because I knew it
would be safe and nobody be fooling it. Wait a minute,
how did you know it was a gold pin?
Speaker 3 (18:08):
Dorney? Do you want to sell that pin? Oh?
Speaker 2 (18:10):
Gosh, Izzie, I don't think it looked good on.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
You, Lesten. I'm in a lot of trouble. Harriet had
to open the package, and she thinks it is a
present from me. If only, instead of writing to my
loving wife, you'd put down a name, I wouldn't be
in this jam.
Speaker 2 (18:25):
I'm sorry. I've only got one wife, and I didn't
think there'd be any.
Speaker 3 (18:28):
Confusion things that March the third is some sort of
anniversary between Harriet me and she just assumed that I
bought the gift for her as a remembrance. Say, that's
quite a mixup. Worst part is she's crazy about the pin,
and I haven't the heart to take it away from her.
Speaker 2 (18:43):
Of course not.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
I haven't attacked either.
Speaker 2 (18:45):
Well, you know this doesn't seem too serious.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
I knew you'd take it this way, Thorny, you are solid.
Oh wait, would you mind getting your wife another pin
and letting me buy this one from you?
Speaker 1 (18:57):
I think that can be right.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
I'll pay you for it anything. I'll write you out
to check this very minute. He's pretty steep, but it
serves me right. Get this check book out. Yeah, I'll
give me the bad news. Thorny, raise yourself us.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
This may be quite a shock.
Speaker 3 (19:11):
It's okay, I deserve it. How much was the pen?
Speaker 1 (19:14):
I have a better idea. Why don't you just take
a little out of your allowance every week and pay
me back on the installment plan.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
In that way, Harriet won't.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
Have to know about it, Donnie, you're a swell guy.
It's a pleasure. How much did it cost?
Speaker 2 (19:27):
A dollar and eighty five cents?
Speaker 3 (19:37):
This is this is silly, but you know it sounds
like you said a dollar eighty five cents. That's what
I did, And I thought I'd have to pay for
it out of my allowance.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
For months and months. Dollar ready five. I can pay
for that in two weeks.
Speaker 3 (20:00):
And Harriet thinks, say, Thorny, that's.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
A pretty cheap gift to give your while we'll just
stop pulling me up and down like a yo yo
sat Thorny, Harriet means a lot more to me than that.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
But this pin is just a gang.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
On our first anniversary, we were broke, so I blew
a couple of bucks on a little piece of costume jewelry.
And every year since then I've gotten Catherine some little
novelty or gadget for sentimental reason.
Speaker 3 (20:24):
Well, then that's not all you're giving. It costs not.
Speaker 1 (20:26):
The pin is part of the tradition, and part of
the joke is hiding is problem? Oh you feel much
better now, do No? I feel much worse for what?
Speaker 3 (20:35):
Well, don't you see? Harriet thinks the pin is very valuable.
And what's worse, I can for the life and you
remember what it is we celebrate and watched the third.
There's only one way to handle this. I've got to
work it out coolly, calmly and logically. I'll be seeing
your thorny here.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
Where are you going?
Speaker 3 (20:51):
Where do you think I'm going right home and straighting
the whole thing.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
Out that way? You're not?
Speaker 3 (20:54):
Why not?
Speaker 2 (20:54):
Because your house is this way?
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Oh? Yes, I'm so mixed up at this point. I
don't know my own name.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
It's Thorny.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
So long odds.
Speaker 5 (21:07):
There you are here?
Speaker 3 (21:09):
Yeah, here I am.
Speaker 4 (21:10):
You've been popping in and out of the house all day.
I haven't been able to find you here.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
What's this? Read the cards to my darling husband in
memory of March the third. Oh, Harrid, you shouldn't have
done it. It's a box of cigars the.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
Same time I gave you for Christmas.
Speaker 3 (21:35):
Oh, Harrod, you shouldn't have done it.
Speaker 4 (21:37):
Well, those cigars went so fast. I thought it'd be
a nice present to give you again.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
Well they went fast because I was giving the mailman
one every morning. Well you can continue giving him Slee No,
I can't. He had himself transferredusing to.
Speaker 4 (22:00):
The gift you gave me that beautiful gold.
Speaker 3 (22:02):
Pin, Harriet? Is that beautiful pin? Where is it? Oh?
Speaker 4 (22:07):
I wouldn't work until I had it insured. Oh, before
I have it insured, I have to have it.
Speaker 3 (22:12):
A praise before you have it a praise. I'd better
have myself insured. What do you mean, Harriet, I want
to talk to you about the cost of that pen.
Speaker 4 (22:22):
Oh, Ozzie, the price isn't important.
Speaker 3 (22:24):
It's the sentiment that counts.
Speaker 4 (22:26):
What difference does it make?
Speaker 3 (22:27):
What you spend five hundred dollars for it or three
hundred or two hundred? What about a dollar eighty five?
Speaker 4 (22:36):
What about a dollar eighty five?
Speaker 3 (22:38):
That's what the pen cost? Oh? A dollar eighty five.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
That's a big laugh.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Good, I could use a big laugh, right.
Speaker 4 (22:47):
I did you mean that tin actually cost only a
dollar eighty five?
Speaker 3 (22:50):
Yeah, but don't forget the sentiment behind it there.
Speaker 4 (22:54):
Well, it still costs more than that box of cigard, Ozzie,
as long as you've been so honest with me, I
have a confession to make to you too. What's that
You promise you won't get angry?
Speaker 3 (23:08):
Well, no, of course not.
Speaker 4 (23:09):
Well, then tell me why are we celebrating March the third.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
You mean you don't know.
Speaker 4 (23:20):
I've been trying to remember all day.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
Just for that, you have to smoke half of these
the gods.
Speaker 4 (23:26):
No, what does March the third stand for?
Speaker 3 (23:28):
Dear allR it. From now on, always remember this March
third is the anniversary of one of the silliest things
that ever happened to you.
Speaker 4 (23:36):
Oh no, dear, your birthday is March twentieth.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
Oh,
The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet, presenting America's favorite young couple.
Speaker 2 (00:05):
Ozzie Nelson and Harriett Hilliott.
Speaker 3 (00:12):
And now let's see what's going on in the Nelson family.
Speaker 1 (00:23):
Well, it's Sunday morning as we visit the Nelson household
at eighteen forty.
Speaker 3 (00:26):
Seven Rogers Rode, Ozzy, Harriet, David and Rickey are seated
around the kitchen table and they've just about finished breakfast.
Speaker 2 (00:34):
Yeah.
Speaker 3 (00:36):
Oh, those hot tastes are great, Harriet.
Speaker 4 (00:37):
Thanks dear caf anymore.
Speaker 3 (00:39):
I couldn't eat another mouthful. Sure was a swell meal,
it wasn't it, Park.
Speaker 2 (00:44):
That certainly was, David.
Speaker 3 (00:46):
Nice day up today too, Yes, beautiful.
Speaker 5 (00:49):
Did you sleep all last night?
Speaker 2 (00:50):
Park?
Speaker 3 (00:51):
Yes? I did, David. It's a good meal, it's a
nice day, and I slept fine. You can bring out
your report card.
Speaker 5 (00:57):
Now, see, Davis, I told you it wouldn't work. Here's
a report card, Pop. David said it was before on Pop,
but I told him Pop.
Speaker 3 (01:07):
Learned English, A spelling, A geography, A hey, this is
all right, arithmetic, A history. B. Well that's a darn
good report card, David.
Speaker 5 (01:23):
Thanks Pop.
Speaker 4 (01:24):
What'd you get Ozzie?
Speaker 3 (01:25):
Oh? E's except in history, oh, dear, and that's the
subject you've been helping him with. We got a B
in history. That's not so bad.
Speaker 5 (01:35):
Here's Ricky's card.
Speaker 4 (01:36):
He did pretty well too, Daddy, except for this one
right here, well.
Speaker 3 (01:41):
On satisfactory and courtesy. How did that happen, Ricky?
Speaker 4 (01:46):
I don't know, pop, or you must have done something
just sturdiest, dear. Don't you know what it was?
Speaker 2 (01:51):
I don't know.
Speaker 3 (01:52):
Did you have any trouble with one of the other
kids at any time?
Speaker 5 (01:55):
Well, not exactly. One day I tried to beat Marianne
Mason to the program. I tripped her and she tell down.
Speaker 3 (02:02):
And you do know why you got unsatisfactory and courtesy?
Speaker 5 (02:05):
Yes, sir, I guess I forgot to say excuse me.
Speaker 3 (02:11):
That isn't the point, Ricky.
Speaker 4 (02:12):
Do you think it was polite to trip.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
A little girl?
Speaker 5 (02:15):
She wills, she drinks me lots of time.
Speaker 4 (02:17):
I know, dear, she can do it to you, but
a man doesn't do things like that to a lady.
Speaker 5 (02:22):
I don't think that's fair.
Speaker 3 (02:24):
I neither do I, Ricky. But that's the way they've
got it set up.
Speaker 4 (02:29):
Did the teacher say, why you only got to be
in history. David.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
Yeah, she said, it's because I can't remember dates.
Speaker 3 (02:35):
I can't remember dates.
Speaker 5 (02:36):
No, golly, how do they expect me to remember a
lot of things that happened before I was born.
Speaker 3 (02:41):
It's just like your father.
Speaker 4 (02:43):
He can't remember a lot of things that happened before
you were born either.
Speaker 5 (02:52):
Why we have to remembered dates?
Speaker 3 (02:53):
Anyway? That's good mental training. If you grow up, you'll
need a good memory for dates. Is that a good
thing to have you married? It is?
Speaker 4 (03:02):
You, see, David, Daddy wishes he learned.
Speaker 3 (03:04):
To remember Dave. Okay, just because I happened to overlook
our tenth anniversary, I.
Speaker 4 (03:08):
Wouldn't have been so bad if it hadn't been the
tenth one you'd overlook.
Speaker 3 (03:15):
You should have reminded me like you do for the
other occasion.
Speaker 1 (03:18):
Can I get on?
Speaker 5 (03:19):
Maybe it's something important?
Speaker 3 (03:20):
Yes, dear, go ahead? Anything more? Ougy, No, thanks, not
a thing.
Speaker 4 (03:24):
Ricky stopped pouring your milk in David's glass? Was it
anything important?
Speaker 3 (03:27):
David? Oh? Hi, Thorny, Good morning everybody. Oh Tony, have
a couple of coffee.
Speaker 1 (03:34):
Oh thanks, Harry, I just finished a tremendous practice.
Speaker 5 (03:36):
How about a half a glass of milk.
Speaker 2 (03:39):
Thanks, Ricky, but I think you better finish it. Ju
I had just dropped in a moment to see you
about something odd.
Speaker 4 (03:44):
Well, if you too want to talk, maybe you better
go in the living room. I don't want to clear
away the dishes.
Speaker 2 (03:48):
Well, I can wait a few moments.
Speaker 3 (03:49):
If you want to help, Thornie, I wouldn't think of
keeping you waiting. Come on, let's go in here. Sit down.
He lacks a while. Toney, thanks, what's new?
Speaker 1 (04:01):
Well, for one thing, tomorrow's our wedding anniversary.
Speaker 3 (04:03):
Oh congratulations, how' do you remember? Well?
Speaker 1 (04:06):
I must admit that my wife helped out with a
few pretty broad hints.
Speaker 3 (04:10):
That always helps. Unfortunately, I seem to make especially of
forgetting anniversaries and birthdays. What makes it worse is that
Harriet always remembers him.
Speaker 2 (04:19):
That's an annoying thing about women.
Speaker 1 (04:20):
They never forget their wedding anniversary.
Speaker 3 (04:22):
And a man invariably does forget. I wonder why that is.
Speaker 1 (04:27):
As a fisherman, do you remember the day you caught
your first big fish?
Speaker 3 (04:31):
Why?
Speaker 1 (04:31):
Yes, I think the fish remembers.
Speaker 3 (04:40):
I see what you mean? For Nie, are you getting
Katherine a gift?
Speaker 2 (04:44):
Yeah, that's what I came to see you about.
Speaker 3 (04:45):
Oh well, I'm flat right now, but maybe I could
get Harry to give me an advance on my allowance.
Speaker 1 (04:50):
This is that I've got the gift right here in
my pocket.
Speaker 2 (04:53):
My problem is to keep Catherine from finding it until tomorrow.
Speaker 3 (04:56):
Oh, I see.
Speaker 1 (04:57):
You know how curious women are, especially Catherine. If it's
anywhere in the house, you'll find it.
Speaker 3 (05:01):
Why don't you keep it right in your pocket?
Speaker 2 (05:03):
Are you kidding? I gotta go to sleep sometime.
Speaker 3 (05:09):
Your wife must be pretty thorough.
Speaker 2 (05:11):
Thorough she can put a bloodhound of shade.
Speaker 1 (05:14):
Last year, I took her birthday present up to the attic,
pushed two trunks aside, opened the closet that had been
locked for two years, climbed up on a pile of newspapers,
and hid the gift in the far corner of the
closet under a pile.
Speaker 3 (05:26):
Of old books. Sounds pretty safe to me.
Speaker 1 (05:28):
I locked the closet door, pushed the trunks up against
the door, locked the attic door, came downstairs, washed my hands,
walked into the living room, and Catherine had her hat
and coat on and was on her way downtown to
exchange the gift.
Speaker 3 (05:46):
I thought you'd go too far, Thorny.
Speaker 2 (05:48):
Would you keep this gift here until tomorrow?
Speaker 3 (05:50):
And sure I'd be glad to thanks?
Speaker 2 (05:51):
They got to go in down and see you later.
Speaker 3 (05:52):
Oh where?
Speaker 2 (05:53):
H Yeah? Don't tell Harriet about this, will you? I
want to keep it from Catherine.
Speaker 3 (05:57):
Oh I want if you don't want me to Thorny.
But she wouldn't tell We don't tell her anyway. Well okay,
but believe me, Harriet isn't like other women. She just
doesn't talk about things like this. No, do you happen to.
Speaker 1 (06:08):
Have a patch on those blue striped shorts you're wearing
that your.
Speaker 3 (06:11):
Mother send you for Christmas? Yes? I do.
Speaker 2 (06:14):
Don't tell Harry you about the brother?
Speaker 4 (06:21):
Hi?
Speaker 2 (06:21):
Pop? Oh?
Speaker 3 (06:22):
Hello, David?
Speaker 1 (06:23):
Say Pop?
Speaker 3 (06:24):
Come in?
Speaker 1 (06:24):
Man?
Speaker 5 (06:24):
Could get some ice cream after Sunday school week? Hey,
I'll bet that's my atomic green?
Speaker 1 (06:29):
Did this package just.
Speaker 5 (06:30):
Come in the mail phone?
Speaker 3 (06:31):
What's that?
Speaker 2 (06:32):
Hey?
Speaker 3 (06:32):
David? Put that down? That doesn't belong to you. I
didn't even know you sent the one sent for No. No, here,
give me the package, Dave. That's a gift for somebody.
Speaker 5 (06:40):
Oh who's the Forepop?
Speaker 3 (06:42):
I promised I wouldn't tell. It's a secret.
Speaker 5 (06:45):
I wonder when my atomic gring is gonna get you.
Speaker 3 (06:47):
M I wonder what this is Thorny got for his wife?
Sounds small and expensive?
Speaker 5 (06:57):
Hey, p what you got there?
Speaker 2 (06:59):
Pop?
Speaker 3 (07:00):
It's a present geesure top? No, no, it's it's not
for you, Ricky.
Speaker 5 (07:05):
Even my birthday next week?
Speaker 3 (07:07):
No, no, Ricky, your birthday isn't until May.
Speaker 5 (07:09):
He was I never get birthdays.
Speaker 3 (07:11):
You get as many birthdays as anybody else.
Speaker 5 (07:14):
How many birthdays have I had?
Speaker 2 (07:16):
Pop?
Speaker 3 (07:17):
Six?
Speaker 5 (07:17):
How many David had?
Speaker 3 (07:19):
Ten? See, Ricky, when you're ten years old like David is?
Now you have had ten birthdays too?
Speaker 5 (07:29):
How many will David is head by?
Speaker 2 (07:31):
Then?
Speaker 3 (07:31):
Let's drop it, Ricky's. Oh it's a big secret. It's
going to be a surprise. Now. Aren't you going to
be late for Sunday school?
Speaker 1 (07:40):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (07:40):
No, I got lots of time. What are you doing
with a prison top?
Speaker 3 (07:44):
I'm putting it right up here on the mantel.
Speaker 5 (07:46):
Why are you putting it up there?
Speaker 2 (07:47):
Pop?
Speaker 3 (07:48):
Just so a certain little boy doesn't go fooling around
with it?
Speaker 5 (07:51):
What little boy?
Speaker 3 (07:52):
A little boy about six and a half years old,
with blonde hair and a butch haircut.
Speaker 5 (07:56):
Is his first name?
Speaker 4 (07:57):
Ricky?
Speaker 3 (07:57):
I wouldn't be surprised.
Speaker 5 (07:59):
Yeah, you better put it up down.
Speaker 3 (08:01):
The Mattel'd you agree with me? I'll be upstairs if
anybody wants me, Ricky, I.
Speaker 5 (08:06):
Don't know why people always think they had to put stuff.
Speaker 4 (08:08):
But I can't reach.
Speaker 5 (08:09):
It, that's right, I can't weak it. Of course Pop
doesn't want me to reach it. But if I wanted
to reach it, I could just pull that chair over. Yes,
sound like I'm small, Rickie.
Speaker 4 (08:30):
What are you doing on that chair?
Speaker 3 (08:32):
And what's that you've got in your hand?
Speaker 5 (08:33):
It's a present?
Speaker 3 (08:34):
What was it for it?
Speaker 5 (08:35):
Pp wouldn't tell me he does a secret secret. Yeah,
he's saving it for a surprise.
Speaker 4 (08:41):
Well, then, I'm sure Daddy doesn't want you fooling around
with it.
Speaker 5 (08:44):
I guess not.
Speaker 4 (08:45):
And don't just think y'all to put it back. Don't
y'all to stick y'all to climb off the chair and
put the chair back where it was.
Speaker 3 (08:59):
Him?
Speaker 4 (09:03):
Hm, sounds small and expensive? Wonderful's inn it?
Speaker 3 (09:10):
Why don't you look? Oh No, that.
Speaker 4 (09:13):
Wouldn't be fair.
Speaker 3 (09:15):
Why wouldn't it, Well, it just wouldn't, that's all.
Speaker 4 (09:20):
I'll bet if you left the package and Allie was here,
he'd teak.
Speaker 3 (09:25):
He would not, He wouldn't too. Go ahead, take a look.
Speaker 4 (09:31):
No, I shouldn't all go on?
Speaker 5 (09:34):
Just want to peak?
Speaker 4 (09:36):
No, go ahead, No, you're being childish about it. I
wonder what it can be.
Speaker 3 (09:47):
Golly, the string is.
Speaker 4 (09:48):
Loose, looks like it'll come right off. H golly came off.
Speaker 3 (09:56):
Poor wrapping.
Speaker 4 (09:57):
I guess i'd better rewrap it. Here is a card
to my loving wife in memory of March the third.
Speaker 3 (10:05):
Hard weren't my tie, Ozzie?
Speaker 4 (10:08):
You shouldn't have done it, Dear, I'm sorry. I looked
at the card that I just couldn't visit.
Speaker 3 (10:12):
But Harriet, that's supposed to I've.
Speaker 4 (10:14):
Never dreamed you remember March the third?
Speaker 3 (10:18):
Oh, oh, yes, March the third.
Speaker 4 (10:22):
I was teaching you about not remembering anniversaries and birthdays
and things, all the while you had the surprise for
March the third.
Speaker 3 (10:28):
March the third, I mean, you know what I'd forget. Frankly,
I was sure you'd forgotten. Oh, darling, how could I
forget the anniversary of the day we I mean the day?
How could I forget March third?
Speaker 4 (10:50):
As long as I know you've got this, is it
all right? If I open it?
Speaker 3 (10:53):
Uh? Oh, Harriet, I think i'd better tell you. The
fact is it is beautiful. What is it I mean?
Speaker 1 (11:04):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (11:04):
This kind is lovely.
Speaker 4 (11:05):
Dear.
Speaker 3 (11:06):
Leave it to you to.
Speaker 4 (11:06):
Do something like this.
Speaker 3 (11:08):
Yeah, leave it to me.
Speaker 4 (11:11):
You're the dearest, sweetest, most thoughtful Marriott.
Speaker 3 (11:14):
Yes, Harriet, there's there's something I want to say to you.
Speaker 4 (11:18):
Yes, dear.
Speaker 3 (11:20):
Happy March third. Watch the third. Can't be our anniversary
that's in October. Can't be the day we became engaged.
That was in the summer. Harriet's birthday is in July.
My birthday is March twentieth. Why is that, Ricky? You
know that's what happened March the third? Hello, March their Hello.
(11:44):
You'll have to excuse me if I don't stop. I'm
in quite a hurry.
Speaker 5 (11:47):
Would you mind if I walk with you? Mister Nelson?
I got nothing to do.
Speaker 2 (11:49):
Not at all.
Speaker 3 (11:50):
But this is as far as I go. I'm just
stopping in here to see mister Thornbury.
Speaker 4 (11:54):
Oh.
Speaker 5 (11:54):
Oh, he isn't home, mister Nelson. I just thought I
leave with his golf club.
Speaker 3 (11:58):
Oh, for Pete's sake, anything wrong with Nelson? Yes, As
a matter of fact, I'm in a lot of trouble.
You're in trouble.
Speaker 4 (12:06):
Oh, how fascinating.
Speaker 5 (12:09):
What's wrong, mister Nelson.
Speaker 3 (12:10):
Well, mister Thornberry left his wife. Mister thorn left his please,
mister Thornberry left his wife's anniversary president at my house.
Missus Nelson found it. Read the card to my wife
in memory of March the third, and she thinks it's
for me. Oh, my goodness, Emmy lou, how much does
(12:32):
a gold pin about? This big cost hobby, this big.
Speaker 1 (12:35):
Seven hundred dollars?
Speaker 3 (12:37):
Holy? What are you gonna do? Mister Nelton? I don't know,
all right. It was so crazy about the pin. I
didn't have the heart to tell her. I didn't even
remember March the third. What's I don't know that either.
Racking my brain trying to remember your anniversary October the eighth.
I checked Harriet first July eighteenth. I checked that too.
Speaker 4 (12:57):
Goodness, mister Nelton, March thear It must be something important
in your life.
Speaker 3 (13:00):
See, I've been thinking all morning. First day I met
her January ninth, the first time I kissed her seven
o'clock January tenth, one year later.
Speaker 5 (13:18):
Why don't you just tell her the truth, mister Nelson,
that if missus Thorndery's gift, and you don't remember what
march their tands for.
Speaker 2 (13:24):
Oh, I don't know.
Speaker 5 (13:25):
You'll get her another one. Tell her it was a
horrible mistake.
Speaker 3 (13:28):
Oh, I don't know her everything.
Speaker 4 (13:30):
She'll understand.
Speaker 5 (13:31):
She'll forgive you. When a woman loves a man, she
has a great capacity for forgiveness.
Speaker 4 (13:36):
So I'm sure missus Nelson will forgive you.
Speaker 3 (13:38):
I suppose after you've told her everything, Look into her eyes.
Speaker 5 (13:44):
Look at the expression on her face. Nothing is so
beautiful as the expression in a woman's eyes when she
forgives her husband for being a daughter.
Speaker 3 (13:55):
I could be so sure about this as you are.
Speaker 4 (13:57):
Oh, you can't be, mister Nelson.
Speaker 5 (13:59):
People should be absolutely honest with each other.
Speaker 3 (14:02):
Yes, I know, and it works.
Speaker 5 (14:03):
One of my girlfriends had a boyfriend and they had
a similar misunderstanding about a Valentine and I gave her.
Speaker 4 (14:09):
The same advice I'm giving you, and did it work?
Speaker 3 (14:13):
Did it work?
Speaker 5 (14:14):
Jeepers, you want to see my new boyfriend.
Speaker 3 (14:20):
Was emmy. That just proves your advice is not too good.
Speaker 5 (14:23):
But it just goes to show what the power of
suggestion can do.
Speaker 3 (14:26):
The power of suggestion. Hey, maybe that's an idea it is. Yeah,
maybe I could go to Harriet and sort of suggest
that the pin doesn't look good on her, or talk
about a better when i'd seen someplace, of course, and.
Speaker 5 (14:38):
Get it back from her and get her another Yeah,
Oh that's song.
Speaker 3 (14:40):
Simply super sammy dog win and try it out right now?
Speaker 5 (14:43):
Good luck, mister Nelson.
Speaker 3 (14:45):
I hope it all turns out just hyper hyper? What's that?
Speaker 1 (14:48):
Oh?
Speaker 4 (14:48):
Hyper's even more duper than super.
Speaker 1 (15:03):
Ozzie? What is it?
Speaker 2 (15:04):
Is?
Speaker 3 (15:04):
Something wrong? No? I was just looking at your pin there,
the new gold pin. Oh.
Speaker 4 (15:10):
I can't take my eyes off of it either. It's
so becoming.
Speaker 3 (15:13):
Oh do you really think so? But yet don't you?
Frankly there, now that I see it on you, I
really don't think it's your type at all? Why not? Well,
it clashes with what I don't know. It just clashes
in general. I think it's beautiful. I wish you'd let
me exchange it for something more different.
Speaker 4 (15:34):
Well, Azzie, I love this tin. Why should you exchange it?
Speaker 2 (15:38):
Will?
Speaker 3 (15:38):
I thought, maybe it's the wrong size or something wrong size,
or the wrong color. I read in a book once
where all the colors you wear should blend, and if
you're wearing any jewelie, like a gold pin, for instance,
it ought to match everything else.
Speaker 4 (15:52):
Well, Darling, a gold tin matches anything.
Speaker 3 (15:56):
Then I read in another book that colors should be
in contrast.
Speaker 4 (16:02):
Look, it's the most beautiful tin I've ever seen. And besides,
you picked it out all by yourself, so I wouldn't
exchange it for the world.
Speaker 3 (16:09):
That's very sweet of you, Dear Harriet. You know I
was just thinking about March the third. Will you ever
forget March the third? No, dear, yes, sir, good old
March the third, Harriet. Uh huh oh, March the third?
(16:29):
What that day meant to us? Hun, dear, uh huh,
March the third. What do you think of when you
think of March the third? Harriet?
Speaker 4 (16:38):
Well, I think of how wonderful and glorious it was.
What do you think of Ojia?
Speaker 3 (16:44):
Same, Harriet. Let's reminisce about March the third. That No, No,
it'll be great fun. You tell me what you did
that day, and then I'll tell you what I did.
Speaker 4 (16:59):
You start, well, right after I got up, I heard
the phone ring. Yes, I answered the phone, and it
was you. Yes, Now it's your turn.
Speaker 3 (17:06):
I I just remembered. I've got to go see Thornberry.
It's very important. Hello, Thornie, What are you doing here
(17:30):
in front of my house waiting for you? I've been
waiting for hours.
Speaker 1 (17:33):
Oh, I start playing golf and then the boys and
I got the chewing the fat in the locker room.
Speaker 2 (17:38):
I didn't know you were waiting for me.
Speaker 3 (17:39):
Well, I don't mind you're playing golf, but hanging around
the locker room when I'm sitting here waiting for you,
never knowing when you're going to get home.
Speaker 2 (17:46):
I'm sorry, dear, I mean, there's what's wrong?
Speaker 3 (17:57):
Well about that gold pen you left at my house?
Speaker 2 (17:59):
I don't I don't need it until tomorrow. That's why
I left it at jaw house, because I knew it
would be safe and nobody be fooling it. Wait a minute,
how did you know it was a gold pin?
Speaker 3 (18:08):
Dorney? Do you want to sell that pin? Oh?
Speaker 2 (18:10):
Gosh, Izzie, I don't think it looked good on.
Speaker 3 (18:12):
You, Lesten. I'm in a lot of trouble. Harriet had
to open the package, and she thinks it is a
present from me. If only, instead of writing to my
loving wife, you'd put down a name, I wouldn't be
in this jam.
Speaker 2 (18:25):
I'm sorry. I've only got one wife, and I didn't
think there'd be any.
Speaker 3 (18:28):
Confusion things that March the third is some sort of
anniversary between Harriet me and she just assumed that I
bought the gift for her as a remembrance. Say, that's
quite a mixup. Worst part is she's crazy about the pin,
and I haven't the heart to take it away from her.
Speaker 2 (18:43):
Of course not.
Speaker 3 (18:43):
I haven't attacked either.
Speaker 2 (18:45):
Well, you know this doesn't seem too serious.
Speaker 3 (18:48):
I knew you'd take it this way, Thorny, you are solid.
Oh wait, would you mind getting your wife another pin
and letting me buy this one from you?
Speaker 1 (18:57):
I think that can be right.
Speaker 3 (18:58):
I'll pay you for it anything. I'll write you out
to check this very minute. He's pretty steep, but it
serves me right. Get this check book out. Yeah, I'll
give me the bad news. Thorny, raise yourself us.
Speaker 2 (19:10):
This may be quite a shock.
Speaker 3 (19:11):
It's okay, I deserve it. How much was the pen?
Speaker 1 (19:14):
I have a better idea. Why don't you just take
a little out of your allowance every week and pay
me back on the installment plan.
Speaker 2 (19:20):
In that way, Harriet won't.
Speaker 3 (19:21):
Have to know about it, Donnie, you're a swell guy.
It's a pleasure. How much did it cost?
Speaker 2 (19:27):
A dollar and eighty five cents?
Speaker 3 (19:37):
This is this is silly, but you know it sounds
like you said a dollar eighty five cents. That's what
I did, And I thought I'd have to pay for
it out of my allowance.
Speaker 2 (19:48):
For months and months. Dollar ready five. I can pay
for that in two weeks.
Speaker 3 (20:00):
And Harriet thinks, say, Thorny, that's.
Speaker 1 (20:03):
A pretty cheap gift to give your while we'll just
stop pulling me up and down like a yo yo
sat Thorny, Harriet means a lot more to me than that.
Speaker 2 (20:12):
But this pin is just a gang.
Speaker 1 (20:14):
On our first anniversary, we were broke, so I blew
a couple of bucks on a little piece of costume jewelry.
And every year since then I've gotten Catherine some little
novelty or gadget for sentimental reason.
Speaker 3 (20:24):
Well, then that's not all you're giving. It costs not.
Speaker 1 (20:26):
The pin is part of the tradition, and part of
the joke is hiding is problem? Oh you feel much
better now, do No? I feel much worse for what?
Speaker 3 (20:35):
Well, don't you see? Harriet thinks the pin is very valuable.
And what's worse, I can for the life and you
remember what it is we celebrate and watched the third.
There's only one way to handle this. I've got to
work it out coolly, calmly and logically. I'll be seeing
your thorny here.
Speaker 1 (20:50):
Where are you going?
Speaker 3 (20:51):
Where do you think I'm going right home and straighting
the whole thing.
Speaker 2 (20:53):
Out that way? You're not?
Speaker 3 (20:54):
Why not?
Speaker 2 (20:54):
Because your house is this way?
Speaker 3 (20:56):
Oh? Yes, I'm so mixed up at this point. I
don't know my own name.
Speaker 2 (20:59):
It's Thorny.
Speaker 3 (21:00):
So long odds.
Speaker 5 (21:07):
There you are here?
Speaker 3 (21:09):
Yeah, here I am.
Speaker 4 (21:10):
You've been popping in and out of the house all day.
I haven't been able to find you here.
Speaker 3 (21:16):
What's this? Read the cards to my darling husband in
memory of March the third. Oh, Harrid, you shouldn't have
done it. It's a box of cigars the.
Speaker 4 (21:33):
Same time I gave you for Christmas.
Speaker 3 (21:35):
Oh, Harrod, you shouldn't have done it.
Speaker 4 (21:37):
Well, those cigars went so fast. I thought it'd be
a nice present to give you again.
Speaker 3 (21:41):
Well they went fast because I was giving the mailman
one every morning. Well you can continue giving him Slee No,
I can't. He had himself transferredusing to.
Speaker 4 (22:00):
The gift you gave me that beautiful gold.
Speaker 3 (22:02):
Pin, Harriet? Is that beautiful pin? Where is it? Oh?
Speaker 4 (22:07):
I wouldn't work until I had it insured. Oh, before
I have it insured, I have to have it.
Speaker 3 (22:12):
A praise before you have it a praise. I'd better
have myself insured. What do you mean, Harriet, I want
to talk to you about the cost of that pen.
Speaker 4 (22:22):
Oh, Ozzie, the price isn't important.
Speaker 3 (22:24):
It's the sentiment that counts.
Speaker 4 (22:26):
What difference does it make?
Speaker 3 (22:27):
What you spend five hundred dollars for it or three
hundred or two hundred? What about a dollar eighty five?
Speaker 4 (22:36):
What about a dollar eighty five?
Speaker 3 (22:38):
That's what the pen cost? Oh? A dollar eighty five.
Speaker 2 (22:43):
That's a big laugh.
Speaker 3 (22:44):
Good, I could use a big laugh, right.
Speaker 4 (22:47):
I did you mean that tin actually cost only a
dollar eighty five?
Speaker 3 (22:50):
Yeah, but don't forget the sentiment behind it there.
Speaker 4 (22:54):
Well, it still costs more than that box of cigard, Ozzie,
as long as you've been so honest with me, I
have a confession to make to you too. What's that
You promise you won't get angry?
Speaker 3 (23:08):
Well, no, of course not.
Speaker 4 (23:09):
Well, then tell me why are we celebrating March the third.
Speaker 3 (23:18):
You mean you don't know.
Speaker 4 (23:20):
I've been trying to remember all day.
Speaker 3 (23:22):
Just for that, you have to smoke half of these
the gods.
Speaker 4 (23:26):
No, what does March the third stand for?
Speaker 3 (23:28):
Dear allR it. From now on, always remember this March
third is the anniversary of one of the silliest things
that ever happened to you.
Speaker 4 (23:36):
Oh no, dear, your birthday is March twentieth.
Speaker 2 (23:39):
Oh,
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