December 26, 2024 • 25 mins
Please enjoy Be On Time a great episode of the legendary Ozzie and Harriet - A Classic Old Time radio Show - OTR
This content was created in partnership and with the help of Artificial Intelligence AI
This content was created in partnership and with the help of Artificial Intelligence AI
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Episode Transcript
Available transcripts are automatically generated. Complete accuracy is not guaranteed.
Speaker 1 (00:25):
We present the amusingly transcribed Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet,
starring America's favorite young couple, Ozzie Nelson and Harriet Hilliard.
(01:04):
Well it's almost breakfast time at the Nelson's house. Harriet Nelson,
the chef has been dim in the kitchen getting things
under control, and is patiently awaiting the mad stamp fee.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
The thundering herd.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
Of male elephants that is, Ozzy and the boys should
be approaching any minute now. Listen, Hey, here footsteps just David.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
I guess they're coming single file this morning, mooning Mama's breakfast.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Ready just about.
Speaker 4 (01:31):
I'm kind of in a hurry this morning.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Well, you must be. You even beat your father and
he knew we were going to have French toast.
Speaker 5 (01:37):
I heard somebody say French toast.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
I knew that he'd bring your running.
Speaker 5 (01:40):
Can we start?
Speaker 2 (01:41):
O Mom? Well you can, but wouldn't you rather wait
until I've made the French toast? Yeah?
Speaker 5 (01:47):
What's the big hurry, David.
Speaker 6 (01:48):
We're having a baseball game this morning, and I'm going
to pitch.
Speaker 5 (01:51):
Oh yeah, I thought Rick was going to play too
when he was supposed to, But I ain't got if
he does flive.
Speaker 4 (01:57):
I know you probably won't even get there. He's such
a slow poke.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
Oh I wouldn't say that, neither would he.
Speaker 5 (02:03):
But it's true.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
He never gets anywhere on time anymore.
Speaker 5 (02:08):
Well, he's your little brother. You ought to try and
help him. Oh I do, pomp.
Speaker 6 (02:11):
He asked me to wake him up this morning for
the game.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Yeah, you sure did. All right, hurry up, Rick, you're late.
I've been in the shower.
Speaker 5 (02:19):
You mean you were actually taking a shower without being told?
Speaker 2 (02:22):
I sure was.
Speaker 7 (02:23):
Next time, may David tell me when he's gonna.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Throw me in? Oh you didn't really throw him in
the shower, did you, David? Of course not.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
Mom. I put him in there very carefully. I don't
think that was a very nice thing to do, Dave.
Speaker 4 (02:38):
I'm Golley Poppy asked for it.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
What do you mean I almost got drowned, he said,
to be sure and waking up. I was getting up slowly,
but I was getting up.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
The trouble with you is you're just a slow poke.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
I am not.
Speaker 5 (02:51):
I bet you won't even get to.
Speaker 4 (02:53):
The ball game on time.
Speaker 5 (02:54):
Come on, now, calm down with your fellas.
Speaker 7 (02:56):
Yeah, David, just calm down. I'll get to the game.
Don't worry like.
Speaker 5 (03:00):
You did last week. I suppose what happened last week?
He begged us all.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
Week to let him be bad boy, and then it
was time for the game. He didn't show up.
Speaker 7 (03:08):
Iin't got there before the game started, didn't I.
Speaker 5 (03:11):
Well, if he got there before the game started.
Speaker 4 (03:13):
I'm sure he had all a bats. Guys were sure
sore too.
Speaker 2 (03:21):
Well, why didn't you get there on time? There? I
don't know.
Speaker 7 (03:24):
I just didn't realize what time it was.
Speaker 5 (03:26):
Well, you have to learn to organize yourself.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
Son.
Speaker 5 (03:29):
Time is a precious thing, and when you're late, you
not only waste your own time, but you waste the
time of other people too. You're at an age now
where you're developing a pattern of life will determine what
kind of a man you're gonna be. I learned to
keep aware of what's going on around you. The old
expression of knowing what time it is has a lot
of meanings.
Speaker 6 (03:48):
You got to make a good subject for your speech, Pump,
What speech is that at the sports lunch in today?
Speaker 5 (03:55):
You didn't forget, did you?
Speaker 2 (03:56):
No?
Speaker 5 (03:57):
No, no, no, no, of course not. Are you sure
that's today?
Speaker 8 (04:04):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Sure? I didn't know you were going to make a speech.
Speaker 5 (04:07):
Well, it's not exactly a speech. It's a high school
baseball coach just wanted some of the fathers to say
a few words. You're sure that's today? Oh sure, it's
the last sports luncheon of the season.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Are you gonna give a lecture, Pump, No.
Speaker 5 (04:21):
Not a lecture. I'm just gonna say a few words.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
What are you gonna speak about?
Speaker 5 (04:26):
Well, I'm not sure yet. I'll think of something.
Speaker 6 (04:31):
I think that stuff about being on time is good.
Speaker 5 (04:34):
Yeah, I say that might be okay. It could be
tied in with sports, you know, being on time, having
things organized?
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Mmmm, that is a good subject. It could also apply
to getting things organized in the home, don't you think.
Speaker 5 (04:47):
Yeah, I suppose you could apply it to almost anything.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
I was thinking about the house in particular, you know,
organizing things, getting things done.
Speaker 5 (04:56):
Well, no, I didn't say anything about getting things done.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Yes, I know, but I did as long as you
were talking about time, I thought it was about time
you got around to fixing the light on the back porch.
Speaker 5 (05:07):
Oh you mean today, there's no time like the present. Well,
I have to replace the whole socket, Harriet.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
I have a new socket right in the pantry there.
All you have to do is put it in.
Speaker 5 (05:16):
Oh, thank you, welcome.
Speaker 8 (05:22):
See.
Speaker 5 (05:22):
I don't suppose there's any chance of my getting out
of this.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
Not much.
Speaker 6 (05:27):
It sounds like you can't get away. Pop, you're a prisoner.
Speaker 7 (05:29):
Yeah, and mom sure makes a pretty good warden.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
What do you mean pretty good?
Speaker 8 (05:34):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (05:35):
Well, he means you're a pretty warden and a good warden, yes, Pop.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
Oh, he's a pretty bad diplomat himself. But I'm fraid
it won't work this time.
Speaker 5 (05:45):
Well I might as well get out of the porch
and get it over with.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
Don't you want your French toast? It's coming right up?
Speaker 5 (05:50):
Just slide it through the bars. Warden?
Speaker 2 (06:03):
What you're doing? Oh?
Speaker 5 (06:05):
I have tony? Now what's it look like I'm doing?
Speaker 9 (06:08):
Looks like you're making a mess out of your back punch.
I happen to be fixing this light, but that light
hasn't worked it over a year.
Speaker 5 (06:14):
Well it's gonna work now. Would you have me a screwdriver?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
There? Howman?
Speaker 5 (06:18):
How are you trick you in and fixing it?
Speaker 2 (06:20):
Well? She didn't.
Speaker 5 (06:21):
I tricked myself.
Speaker 9 (06:23):
Pretty clever guy, aren't you.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (06:25):
I don't mess around by You're not mess.
Speaker 9 (06:29):
Around that socket with that screwdriver. You're messing around, days
will be over.
Speaker 5 (06:33):
No, that'll be ridiculous. Toney, I got the house current
turned off. I know that much.
Speaker 9 (06:37):
At least you're a regular young Tom Edison, aren't you.
Speaker 5 (06:40):
Yeah, I really wouldn't say that, neither would I.
Speaker 9 (06:44):
Well, we got a busted lamp at our house and
I thought a little flattery might get you over.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
To fix it.
Speaker 5 (06:48):
Oh, I'm sorry, Thorny. I have a speech to make
the sports lunch in this noon.
Speaker 8 (06:52):
A speech? Eh?
Speaker 9 (06:53):
Are you really on the sucker list today.
Speaker 5 (06:55):
Aren't you? Well, it really isn't what you call a
speech exactly. I'm just going over to say a few
well chosen words.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
That's even worse.
Speaker 9 (07:03):
Sounds like a lecture to me.
Speaker 5 (07:05):
No, I've given my lecture for this morning. Who was
the unhappy victim? Well it wasn't exactly a lecturer. Who
wasn't Harriet? No, No, you know I never lecture Harriet.
Speaker 9 (07:16):
Of course, not usually pick on one of the boys
because they're too small.
Speaker 8 (07:19):
To fight back.
Speaker 5 (07:22):
Just a second, that David isn't so small. He's getting
to be quite a big guy.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
So you were living.
Speaker 5 (07:26):
Dangerously and gave David a lecture. Huh, No, I was
playing it safe and gave the lecture to Ricky. He's
the one who needed it way. Well, the kid has
suddenly developed a habit of being late for everything. Thorny
has actually no conception of time.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
Well, so what, he's just a kid.
Speaker 5 (07:44):
Well, I know, but I don't want him going through
the rest of his life not knowing what time it is.
Speaker 9 (07:48):
Well, I wouldn't worry about it. After all, he's your son.
If there's anything this heredity stuff at all, he'll he'll.
Speaker 5 (07:56):
Yeah, I see what you mean. I figured it's about
time he learned the importance of responsibility, you know, the
fact that other people may be depending on him. I
remember when I was a kid.
Speaker 9 (08:05):
I was the same way until one Christmas my father
gave me something that straightened me right out.
Speaker 5 (08:10):
Oh I think spanking. The boy's little old fashioned. I
mean he gave me a watch. O.
Speaker 9 (08:16):
Not an expensive one, just one of those moderately priced
watches I think it was. But it's told time, and
that's all that mattered.
Speaker 5 (08:24):
You might have something there. Thorny could run downtown now
and buy him one.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Yeah, he'll love it us.
Speaker 5 (08:30):
Yeah, that's a good idea.
Speaker 9 (08:31):
Oh things, And believe me, those things really last too.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
I had it.
Speaker 8 (08:34):
I out to college.
Speaker 9 (08:35):
Then I finally had to get rid of it.
Speaker 5 (08:37):
What happened to breakdown?
Speaker 8 (08:39):
No?
Speaker 9 (08:39):
No, it was running fine, but I just got a
little self conscious when the fellows around the fraternity house
started calling me mickey mouse.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
Oh I wreck out of the game.
Speaker 7 (08:55):
Fine, I guess, but didn't you play?
Speaker 2 (08:58):
No, ma'am, most darn guys. What do they do? He
started on time. I'm afraid it's your own fault there.
I thought sure i'd get there. Well, you left the
house so late. No wonder you didn't make it. I
told you should have left with David.
Speaker 5 (09:13):
Ah, you're just a young man. I want to see
Rick who me. That's right.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
He didn't get to play ball in the ball game
because he was late.
Speaker 5 (09:20):
Well, I think we have a solution to that sort
of thing. It's just what I want to see him about.
You are, son. Just feast your eyes on.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
This gene you watch. Isn't a real one, of course
it is. Say that's a beauty. Who's it for?
Speaker 5 (09:36):
It's for this young gentleman right here?
Speaker 2 (09:38):
You mean me?
Speaker 5 (09:39):
You're the only young gentleman here, aren't.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
You well be careful I answer that, Ricky. It may
be a trick question.
Speaker 5 (09:46):
No, there's no trick at all. Just look at this watch.
He's got a second hand. It's waterproof and it's shock
proof too. No kidding, sure, let me show you can't.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Be checked on my table.
Speaker 5 (09:56):
Oh oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, listen to it, rick What
do you hear?
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Nothing?
Speaker 8 (10:02):
You must have stopped.
Speaker 5 (10:07):
Well a man said you could.
Speaker 9 (10:09):
Oh.
Speaker 5 (10:09):
Oh, wait a minute, I forgot to wind at the time.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Total help.
Speaker 5 (10:12):
There you are, son, it's you all saying, goes wear
it in good health?
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Oh boy, thanks tom.
Speaker 5 (10:18):
Oh wait a minute, and here's another feature. It has
a luminous dial.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Isn't that lovely?
Speaker 5 (10:23):
Yes, sir, luminous hunh, that's right. You know what that means.
Speaker 7 (10:28):
Sure, it means I won't be in the dark about
what time it is anymore.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
Uh uh, Well, sir, This is gonna be quite an
important day for Ronzie Nelson.
Speaker 4 (10:53):
He's gonna make.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
A speech at the high school sports luncheon. The subject
of his speech is the importance.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Of being on time.
Speaker 3 (11:01):
This is quite appropriate too, because just this morning at breakfast,
Ozzie stressed the importance of awareness to David and Ricky.
Speaker 5 (11:09):
Hey, pop, Oh hi, Dave, Hey, why all dressed up?
Speaker 6 (11:13):
I'm leaving for the luncheon now I'm supposed to be
over there a little early.
Speaker 5 (11:17):
All I want what's the matter with this table?
Speaker 2 (11:20):
Lamp? Or? Want to work? Now?
Speaker 5 (11:22):
I must need a new bulb or something.
Speaker 6 (11:24):
I talked to mister Henryson about the speech you're gonna
give you liked it very much. In fact, he wants
you to be the first speaker.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
On the program.
Speaker 5 (11:30):
Oh so it reminds me. I better jot down a
few notes just what you said at breakfast on and
finding me.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
Well you like that?
Speaker 5 (11:38):
Huh? Yeah?
Speaker 8 (11:40):
So did?
Speaker 5 (11:41):
I wish I could remember what I said.
Speaker 4 (11:45):
It was about being on time?
Speaker 5 (11:47):
Yeah, I remember that much of it. What time is
the luncheon? It starts at one o'clock. Oh well, I'll
give you an hour or so to put something together. See,
I have to think of a good title first. How
about the importance of being on time? That's good?
Speaker 8 (12:07):
Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 5 (12:09):
Today I'm going to speak to you on a very
a very timely subject.
Speaker 8 (12:16):
Now that's the old Carny.
Speaker 4 (12:19):
I better get going. I'll see you over at the
lodge hall.
Speaker 8 (12:21):
Okay, Dave.
Speaker 5 (12:24):
The subject of my talk is the importance of being
on time. Yeah, don't be late.
Speaker 10 (12:47):
The time is twelve thirty five and ten seconds.
Speaker 2 (12:52):
That's right, Reggy.
Speaker 10 (12:54):
I'm here, marm. The time is twelve thirty five and.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
That's right, you sing.
Speaker 7 (13:04):
I'm just making sure the telephone company gives people the
right time.
Speaker 10 (13:10):
The time is twelve thirty five and thirty seconds. That's right.
The operator hasn't made.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
A mistake yet.
Speaker 8 (13:19):
I've got a pretty good watch, too.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
Well, how about hanging up now somebody may be trying
to call us.
Speaker 10 (13:26):
Okay, the time is twelve thirty five and forty seconds.
Speaker 2 (13:31):
That's right. Move over there. I want to plug in
the vacuum cleaner.
Speaker 7 (13:35):
This is really a swell watch. I'll bet I'm never
late for anything again.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
That's fine. Never late else, and they're gonna call me,
that's fine, dear. Yeah, I wish I had something to
do today so I could be on.
Speaker 7 (13:45):
Time for it. I want me to stick around you
in case you want to know what time it is.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
No, thanks, dear, I'm sure that won't be necessary. That's funny.
What's the matter, I don't know. Something needs to be
wrong with a vacuum cleaner.
Speaker 5 (14:00):
Can I read telling to you? What's that other talk?
I'm going to give it a lunch in this note.
See how this sounds. Since the beginning of time, men
have been late. How do you like that?
Speaker 2 (14:13):
Oh, it's very good. It's a short speech, but to
the point.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
No, no, no, no, this more as if you didn't know.
That's just my opening little joke, so to speak. A
little smile.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
Oh, I thought you're only going to say a few words.
Judging from that manuscript in your hand, you prepared quite
a sermon.
Speaker 5 (14:31):
No, no, this is just a rough draft. Naturally, I
plan to go over it and cut out one or
two pages.
Speaker 2 (14:36):
Well don't you think you better hurry? What time to
lunch and start? Oh?
Speaker 5 (14:39):
Not until one o'clock at plenty of time. It's only
eleven thirty.
Speaker 7 (14:43):
That clock isn't right, Pop, Well, of course.
Speaker 5 (14:45):
It's right, Ricky. It's an electric clock.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
I'm afraid it's wrong.
Speaker 8 (14:48):
Pop.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
I know, I got a watch. You can take Ricky's
word for it, Dear. He's been listening to the time
signal for the last half hour.
Speaker 5 (14:55):
But that clock always keeps perfect time. It says eleven
thirty right on the nose. I mean, he said eleven
thirty a couple of minutes ago. And I walked in
here too.
Speaker 2 (15:06):
He said, eleven thirty an hour ago.
Speaker 5 (15:10):
Man, let me take a look. Well, no, wonder this
clock has stopped, Harriot.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Or something must be wrong with the power. The vacuum
cleaner won't work either.
Speaker 5 (15:17):
Well, what are you supposed to happen?
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Could it have been something you did when you were
fixing the porch light?
Speaker 5 (15:23):
Well, what could I have done? It's a very simple operation.
You turn off the electricity, fixed the light and turn
on the veal. You no, I'll tell you what I
could have done. I could have forgotten to turn the
electricity back on again. Go on, that's exactly what happened.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Well, I wouldn't get upset about it. It's nothing serious.
Speaker 5 (15:46):
Oh, holy smokes, I just thought of something. If that
clock is stopped, what time is it?
Speaker 2 (15:50):
Would you like me to tell you?
Speaker 5 (15:52):
Please do at the tone, Ricky? What time is it?
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Ten minutes to one?
Speaker 8 (15:57):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (15:58):
Well that guse me exactly ten minutes to get I
ain't up shaved and get dressed.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Get off the.
Speaker 5 (16:01):
Lodge auditorium, Harriet. I can't possibly make it.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
We'll just get over there as soon as.
Speaker 5 (16:06):
You can Oh, this is gonna be very embarrassing. I
show up late and give a talk on the importance
of being on time.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
You've only got nine minutes and thirty seconds now, Pop,
Come on, dere. If you hurry, you won't be too late.
Those luncheons never start on time anyway.
Speaker 5 (16:21):
This will probably be the first one that ever did well.
Speaker 6 (16:24):
The longer you wait, the later you're gonna be nine
minutes and five seconds pop.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
It seems to me I'm more starling nine minutes and three.
Speaker 5 (16:31):
Seconds Okay, Okay, I'm going.
Speaker 2 (16:43):
Ozzy. Are you ready yet? I'll be right there. You've
got one minute and five seconds POP coming coming. You
better hurry. Well, believe me, I am one minute pop.
Speaker 5 (16:53):
Okay, I'm ready. I didn't have time to shave, but
I think I look all right.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
You look fine there.
Speaker 5 (16:56):
Here, Well, you fix my couple links while I put
on my tie thirty seconds. You know, maybe I shouldn't
even go to that darn luncheon now, Harriet.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
You've got to go, dear. They're expecting you to speak.
Speaker 5 (17:09):
Yes, thank you, Ricky.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
You can't let David down.
Speaker 5 (17:12):
I've already let him down. Hey, maybe we could call
and say I'm sick. We well you could call. Oh no,
well you've got to, Harry, and I'm much too sick
to call. Yes, Ricky, you're late. Probably somebody calling from
(17:37):
the lotch hall tell whoever it is. I just left, Harriet.
Speaker 2 (17:40):
Well, go ahead and then I'll be telling the truth.
Speaker 5 (17:44):
No, never let it ring. They've got a lot of
nerve hounding a man just because he's a few minutes.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
Late, one minute and eighteen seconds late, to be exactly,
you got a good going.
Speaker 8 (17:54):
Dear, Harried.
Speaker 5 (17:56):
I can't face those.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
People now, but you've got to. Maybe I'm better answer
the phone.
Speaker 5 (18:01):
No, no, no, just leave it alone. I know I'm late.
They don't have to call just to tell me that
I've got a son with a watch.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
Here's your coad.
Speaker 5 (18:12):
Hey, wait a minute, this may work out after all.
Speaker 7 (18:15):
I'm late, right right, two minutes in thinteen seconds.
Speaker 5 (18:18):
Thank you. I'm late to a luncheon where I'm going
to talk on the importance of being on time. Do
you see what I'm driving on, Harriet? No, Well, I'm
going to be the example of what happens when you're late.
Speaker 8 (18:29):
Do you get it? No?
Speaker 5 (18:31):
Well, look, by being late, I point up exactly what
I'm talking about. I'm a graphic illustration of my speech.
I'm the horrible example of the confusion and the embarrassment
that occurs.
Speaker 8 (18:42):
When a man is late.
Speaker 2 (18:44):
Oh no, I see.
Speaker 5 (18:45):
Do you like the idea? No, but you can take
my word for Harriet. This is brilliant. Not brilliant, but
it's a good way to worm out of an embarrassing situation.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
I guess it's a pretty good idea that hadn't you
better hurry?
Speaker 5 (19:00):
No, the later I am now, the better.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
See.
Speaker 5 (19:06):
The perfect dramatic effect is for me to arrive just
after they've finished lunch mister Hendricks, and the chairman rises,
looks around the hall in a bewildered sort of a way,
taps on his water glass, and he says, gentlemen, I
can't imagine what's happened to our first speaker for today.
Speaker 8 (19:27):
This is brilliant, Harriet.
Speaker 9 (19:46):
Gentlemen, I am can't imagine what's happened to our first
speaker for today.
Speaker 8 (19:50):
It's all right, sir, here I am.
Speaker 5 (19:52):
I'm here now. Thank goodness, we were getting worried. Gentlemen,
I have committed an un forgivable act. I have been
late for this important luncheon thirty minutes late. To be exact,
there is no excuse for my thunlesness. By being late,
I have not only caused a lot of confusion, but
(20:15):
I have inconvenienced.
Speaker 2 (20:16):
All of you.
Speaker 5 (20:17):
Oh that's perfectly all right, we understand.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
No, no, no, it isn't all right.
Speaker 5 (20:22):
It's a terrible thing to do. Now I must apologize naturally.
This is as embarrassing to me as it is embarrassing
to you. Believe me, gentlemen, I sincerely and humbly apologize
for my rudeness. Now you have just witnessed what happens
when a man is late. Confusion, inconvenience, and embarrassment for
(20:44):
all concerns. Now, I can tell you that this was
my way of illustrating the subject. I'm going to speak
on the importance of being on tire.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
I hope you'll forgive.
Speaker 5 (20:58):
This rather dramatic processor, Professor, I beg your pardon. I
hate to interrupt, but I thought you were speaking on
Plato today. Well, no, David told me you were very
happy with my choice of subject. David's David, Well, that's
my son, mister Hendrickson. Mister Hendrickson, who's mister Hendrickson. Why
aren't you mister Hendrickson.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
Oh no, no, I'm doctor Peppin.
Speaker 5 (21:20):
Who you clim, Ozzie Nelson? You mean you aren't Professor Higgins. No,
I'm sure I'm Ozen you mean you are, mister Hendrickson.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
I'm doctor Peppin.
Speaker 5 (21:29):
Where's mister Hendrickson? I don't know what's Professor Higgins? I
don't know where am i all at the semi annual
luncheon of the Plochlian Literary Society. You mean this isn't
the luncheon for the High School Athletic Association? Of course not.
Now what have you done with Professor Higgins.
Speaker 9 (21:48):
Scoring my possible delay that I got here just as
soon as possible, mister Hendrickson, No, doctor Peppin, I'm doctor Peppin.
Speaker 4 (21:56):
I'm Professor Higgins.
Speaker 5 (21:57):
Blymizie Nelson, have you seen mister Hendrickson? Hey, Papa, I've
been looking.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
All over the lobby for you.
Speaker 5 (22:12):
David. Where is everybody?
Speaker 8 (22:13):
Well?
Speaker 4 (22:14):
The luncheon had to be postponed until two thirty?
Speaker 5 (22:16):
Well what happened?
Speaker 2 (22:17):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (22:18):
Somebody got the plans all mixed up.
Speaker 6 (22:19):
Some literary societies using the dining room, right, now, yes,
I know I've met them.
Speaker 4 (22:25):
I phoned the house, but nobody was home.
Speaker 5 (22:27):
Oh then you are the one who called. Yeah, how
come you didn't answer? Well, I'd already gone.
Speaker 8 (22:33):
Oh huh.
Speaker 5 (22:38):
Well it's hard to explain, David. This has been a
very frantic day so far, real crazy.
Speaker 4 (22:44):
Yeah, your head.
Speaker 6 (22:45):
The luncheon starts in an hour, so we better get going.
Speaker 4 (22:47):
Pop, We'll have to hurry too.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
Wait a minute, we'd.
Speaker 4 (22:51):
Better get going where where everybody else is gone?
Speaker 5 (22:54):
Only to get some lunch.
Speaker 4 (22:55):
I can't wait until two thirty to eat.
Speaker 5 (22:57):
Oh oh home?
Speaker 2 (22:59):
Huh?
Speaker 5 (22:59):
Yeah, I suppose you lead the way, David. I'm not
sure I can find.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
It, mister Burnsmith saying, Tune in again next week for
another transcribed adventure of Ozzie and Harriet, starring Ozzie Nelson
and Harriet Hillard. This is the United States Armed Forces
(24:20):
Radio Service
Speaker 8 (25:00):
In s
We present the amusingly transcribed Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet,
starring America's favorite young couple, Ozzie Nelson and Harriet Hilliard.
(01:04):
Well it's almost breakfast time at the Nelson's house. Harriet Nelson,
the chef has been dim in the kitchen getting things
under control, and is patiently awaiting the mad stamp fee.
Speaker 2 (01:14):
The thundering herd.
Speaker 1 (01:15):
Of male elephants that is, Ozzy and the boys should
be approaching any minute now. Listen, Hey, here footsteps just David.
Speaker 3 (01:27):
I guess they're coming single file this morning, mooning Mama's breakfast.
Speaker 2 (01:30):
Ready just about.
Speaker 4 (01:31):
I'm kind of in a hurry this morning.
Speaker 2 (01:33):
Well, you must be. You even beat your father and
he knew we were going to have French toast.
Speaker 5 (01:37):
I heard somebody say French toast.
Speaker 2 (01:39):
I knew that he'd bring your running.
Speaker 5 (01:40):
Can we start?
Speaker 2 (01:41):
O Mom? Well you can, but wouldn't you rather wait
until I've made the French toast? Yeah?
Speaker 5 (01:47):
What's the big hurry, David.
Speaker 6 (01:48):
We're having a baseball game this morning, and I'm going
to pitch.
Speaker 5 (01:51):
Oh yeah, I thought Rick was going to play too
when he was supposed to, But I ain't got if
he does flive.
Speaker 4 (01:57):
I know you probably won't even get there. He's such
a slow poke.
Speaker 2 (02:01):
Oh I wouldn't say that, neither would he.
Speaker 5 (02:03):
But it's true.
Speaker 2 (02:06):
He never gets anywhere on time anymore.
Speaker 5 (02:08):
Well, he's your little brother. You ought to try and
help him. Oh I do, pomp.
Speaker 6 (02:11):
He asked me to wake him up this morning for
the game.
Speaker 2 (02:14):
Yeah, you sure did. All right, hurry up, Rick, you're late.
I've been in the shower.
Speaker 5 (02:19):
You mean you were actually taking a shower without being told?
Speaker 2 (02:22):
I sure was.
Speaker 7 (02:23):
Next time, may David tell me when he's gonna.
Speaker 2 (02:25):
Throw me in? Oh you didn't really throw him in
the shower, did you, David? Of course not.
Speaker 5 (02:32):
Mom. I put him in there very carefully. I don't
think that was a very nice thing to do, Dave.
Speaker 4 (02:38):
I'm Golley Poppy asked for it.
Speaker 2 (02:40):
What do you mean I almost got drowned, he said,
to be sure and waking up. I was getting up slowly,
but I was getting up.
Speaker 4 (02:48):
The trouble with you is you're just a slow poke.
Speaker 2 (02:50):
I am not.
Speaker 5 (02:51):
I bet you won't even get to.
Speaker 4 (02:53):
The ball game on time.
Speaker 5 (02:54):
Come on, now, calm down with your fellas.
Speaker 7 (02:56):
Yeah, David, just calm down. I'll get to the game.
Don't worry like.
Speaker 5 (03:00):
You did last week. I suppose what happened last week?
He begged us all.
Speaker 4 (03:05):
Week to let him be bad boy, and then it
was time for the game. He didn't show up.
Speaker 7 (03:08):
Iin't got there before the game started, didn't I.
Speaker 5 (03:11):
Well, if he got there before the game started.
Speaker 4 (03:13):
I'm sure he had all a bats. Guys were sure
sore too.
Speaker 2 (03:21):
Well, why didn't you get there on time? There? I
don't know.
Speaker 7 (03:24):
I just didn't realize what time it was.
Speaker 5 (03:26):
Well, you have to learn to organize yourself.
Speaker 2 (03:28):
Son.
Speaker 5 (03:29):
Time is a precious thing, and when you're late, you
not only waste your own time, but you waste the
time of other people too. You're at an age now
where you're developing a pattern of life will determine what
kind of a man you're gonna be. I learned to
keep aware of what's going on around you. The old
expression of knowing what time it is has a lot
of meanings.
Speaker 6 (03:48):
You got to make a good subject for your speech, Pump,
What speech is that at the sports lunch in today?
Speaker 5 (03:55):
You didn't forget, did you?
Speaker 2 (03:56):
No?
Speaker 5 (03:57):
No, no, no, no, of course not. Are you sure
that's today?
Speaker 8 (04:04):
Oh?
Speaker 2 (04:04):
Sure? I didn't know you were going to make a speech.
Speaker 5 (04:07):
Well, it's not exactly a speech. It's a high school
baseball coach just wanted some of the fathers to say
a few words. You're sure that's today? Oh sure, it's
the last sports luncheon of the season.
Speaker 2 (04:18):
Are you gonna give a lecture, Pump, No.
Speaker 5 (04:21):
Not a lecture. I'm just gonna say a few words.
Speaker 2 (04:24):
What are you gonna speak about?
Speaker 5 (04:26):
Well, I'm not sure yet. I'll think of something.
Speaker 6 (04:31):
I think that stuff about being on time is good.
Speaker 5 (04:34):
Yeah, I say that might be okay. It could be
tied in with sports, you know, being on time, having
things organized?
Speaker 2 (04:41):
Mmmm, that is a good subject. It could also apply
to getting things organized in the home, don't you think.
Speaker 5 (04:47):
Yeah, I suppose you could apply it to almost anything.
Speaker 2 (04:50):
I was thinking about the house in particular, you know,
organizing things, getting things done.
Speaker 5 (04:56):
Well, no, I didn't say anything about getting things done.
Speaker 2 (05:00):
Yes, I know, but I did as long as you
were talking about time, I thought it was about time
you got around to fixing the light on the back porch.
Speaker 5 (05:07):
Oh you mean today, there's no time like the present. Well,
I have to replace the whole socket, Harriet.
Speaker 2 (05:13):
I have a new socket right in the pantry there.
All you have to do is put it in.
Speaker 5 (05:16):
Oh, thank you, welcome.
Speaker 8 (05:22):
See.
Speaker 5 (05:22):
I don't suppose there's any chance of my getting out
of this.
Speaker 2 (05:25):
Not much.
Speaker 6 (05:27):
It sounds like you can't get away. Pop, you're a prisoner.
Speaker 7 (05:29):
Yeah, and mom sure makes a pretty good warden.
Speaker 2 (05:33):
What do you mean pretty good?
Speaker 8 (05:34):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (05:35):
Well, he means you're a pretty warden and a good warden, yes, Pop.
Speaker 2 (05:41):
Oh, he's a pretty bad diplomat himself. But I'm fraid
it won't work this time.
Speaker 5 (05:45):
Well I might as well get out of the porch
and get it over with.
Speaker 2 (05:47):
Don't you want your French toast? It's coming right up?
Speaker 5 (05:50):
Just slide it through the bars. Warden?
Speaker 2 (06:03):
What you're doing? Oh?
Speaker 5 (06:05):
I have tony? Now what's it look like I'm doing?
Speaker 9 (06:08):
Looks like you're making a mess out of your back punch.
I happen to be fixing this light, but that light
hasn't worked it over a year.
Speaker 5 (06:14):
Well it's gonna work now. Would you have me a screwdriver?
Speaker 2 (06:18):
There? Howman?
Speaker 5 (06:18):
How are you trick you in and fixing it?
Speaker 2 (06:20):
Well? She didn't.
Speaker 5 (06:21):
I tricked myself.
Speaker 9 (06:23):
Pretty clever guy, aren't you.
Speaker 2 (06:24):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (06:25):
I don't mess around by You're not mess.
Speaker 9 (06:29):
Around that socket with that screwdriver. You're messing around, days
will be over.
Speaker 5 (06:33):
No, that'll be ridiculous. Toney, I got the house current
turned off. I know that much.
Speaker 9 (06:37):
At least you're a regular young Tom Edison, aren't you.
Speaker 5 (06:40):
Yeah, I really wouldn't say that, neither would I.
Speaker 9 (06:44):
Well, we got a busted lamp at our house and
I thought a little flattery might get you over.
Speaker 2 (06:47):
To fix it.
Speaker 5 (06:48):
Oh, I'm sorry, Thorny. I have a speech to make
the sports lunch in this noon.
Speaker 8 (06:52):
A speech? Eh?
Speaker 9 (06:53):
Are you really on the sucker list today.
Speaker 5 (06:55):
Aren't you? Well, it really isn't what you call a
speech exactly. I'm just going over to say a few
well chosen words.
Speaker 1 (07:02):
That's even worse.
Speaker 9 (07:03):
Sounds like a lecture to me.
Speaker 5 (07:05):
No, I've given my lecture for this morning. Who was
the unhappy victim? Well it wasn't exactly a lecturer. Who
wasn't Harriet? No, No, you know I never lecture Harriet.
Speaker 9 (07:16):
Of course, not usually pick on one of the boys
because they're too small.
Speaker 8 (07:19):
To fight back.
Speaker 5 (07:22):
Just a second, that David isn't so small. He's getting
to be quite a big guy.
Speaker 2 (07:26):
So you were living.
Speaker 5 (07:26):
Dangerously and gave David a lecture. Huh, No, I was
playing it safe and gave the lecture to Ricky. He's
the one who needed it way. Well, the kid has
suddenly developed a habit of being late for everything. Thorny
has actually no conception of time.
Speaker 1 (07:42):
Well, so what, he's just a kid.
Speaker 5 (07:44):
Well, I know, but I don't want him going through
the rest of his life not knowing what time it is.
Speaker 9 (07:48):
Well, I wouldn't worry about it. After all, he's your son.
If there's anything this heredity stuff at all, he'll he'll.
Speaker 5 (07:56):
Yeah, I see what you mean. I figured it's about
time he learned the importance of responsibility, you know, the
fact that other people may be depending on him. I
remember when I was a kid.
Speaker 9 (08:05):
I was the same way until one Christmas my father
gave me something that straightened me right out.
Speaker 5 (08:10):
Oh I think spanking. The boy's little old fashioned. I
mean he gave me a watch. O.
Speaker 9 (08:16):
Not an expensive one, just one of those moderately priced
watches I think it was. But it's told time, and
that's all that mattered.
Speaker 5 (08:24):
You might have something there. Thorny could run downtown now
and buy him one.
Speaker 2 (08:28):
Yeah, he'll love it us.
Speaker 5 (08:30):
Yeah, that's a good idea.
Speaker 9 (08:31):
Oh things, And believe me, those things really last too.
Speaker 2 (08:34):
I had it.
Speaker 8 (08:34):
I out to college.
Speaker 9 (08:35):
Then I finally had to get rid of it.
Speaker 5 (08:37):
What happened to breakdown?
Speaker 8 (08:39):
No?
Speaker 9 (08:39):
No, it was running fine, but I just got a
little self conscious when the fellows around the fraternity house
started calling me mickey mouse.
Speaker 2 (08:53):
Oh I wreck out of the game.
Speaker 7 (08:55):
Fine, I guess, but didn't you play?
Speaker 2 (08:58):
No, ma'am, most darn guys. What do they do? He
started on time. I'm afraid it's your own fault there.
I thought sure i'd get there. Well, you left the
house so late. No wonder you didn't make it. I
told you should have left with David.
Speaker 5 (09:13):
Ah, you're just a young man. I want to see
Rick who me. That's right.
Speaker 2 (09:18):
He didn't get to play ball in the ball game
because he was late.
Speaker 5 (09:20):
Well, I think we have a solution to that sort
of thing. It's just what I want to see him about.
You are, son. Just feast your eyes on.
Speaker 2 (09:29):
This gene you watch. Isn't a real one, of course
it is. Say that's a beauty. Who's it for?
Speaker 5 (09:36):
It's for this young gentleman right here?
Speaker 2 (09:38):
You mean me?
Speaker 5 (09:39):
You're the only young gentleman here, aren't.
Speaker 2 (09:41):
You well be careful I answer that, Ricky. It may
be a trick question.
Speaker 5 (09:46):
No, there's no trick at all. Just look at this watch.
He's got a second hand. It's waterproof and it's shock
proof too. No kidding, sure, let me show you can't.
Speaker 2 (09:55):
Be checked on my table.
Speaker 5 (09:56):
Oh oh, I'm sorry. Yeah, listen to it, rick What
do you hear?
Speaker 2 (10:02):
Nothing?
Speaker 8 (10:02):
You must have stopped.
Speaker 5 (10:07):
Well a man said you could.
Speaker 9 (10:09):
Oh.
Speaker 5 (10:09):
Oh, wait a minute, I forgot to wind at the time.
Speaker 2 (10:11):
Total help.
Speaker 5 (10:12):
There you are, son, it's you all saying, goes wear
it in good health?
Speaker 2 (10:17):
Oh boy, thanks tom.
Speaker 5 (10:18):
Oh wait a minute, and here's another feature. It has
a luminous dial.
Speaker 2 (10:22):
Isn't that lovely?
Speaker 5 (10:23):
Yes, sir, luminous hunh, that's right. You know what that means.
Speaker 7 (10:28):
Sure, it means I won't be in the dark about
what time it is anymore.
Speaker 3 (10:31):
Uh uh, Well, sir, This is gonna be quite an
important day for Ronzie Nelson.
Speaker 4 (10:53):
He's gonna make.
Speaker 3 (10:53):
A speech at the high school sports luncheon. The subject
of his speech is the importance.
Speaker 1 (10:59):
Of being on time.
Speaker 3 (11:01):
This is quite appropriate too, because just this morning at breakfast,
Ozzie stressed the importance of awareness to David and Ricky.
Speaker 5 (11:09):
Hey, pop, Oh hi, Dave, Hey, why all dressed up?
Speaker 6 (11:13):
I'm leaving for the luncheon now I'm supposed to be
over there a little early.
Speaker 5 (11:17):
All I want what's the matter with this table?
Speaker 2 (11:20):
Lamp? Or? Want to work? Now?
Speaker 5 (11:22):
I must need a new bulb or something.
Speaker 6 (11:24):
I talked to mister Henryson about the speech you're gonna
give you liked it very much. In fact, he wants
you to be the first speaker.
Speaker 2 (11:29):
On the program.
Speaker 5 (11:30):
Oh so it reminds me. I better jot down a
few notes just what you said at breakfast on and
finding me.
Speaker 2 (11:37):
Well you like that?
Speaker 5 (11:38):
Huh? Yeah?
Speaker 8 (11:40):
So did?
Speaker 5 (11:41):
I wish I could remember what I said.
Speaker 4 (11:45):
It was about being on time?
Speaker 5 (11:47):
Yeah, I remember that much of it. What time is
the luncheon? It starts at one o'clock. Oh well, I'll
give you an hour or so to put something together. See,
I have to think of a good title first. How
about the importance of being on time? That's good?
Speaker 8 (12:07):
Yeah, I like that.
Speaker 5 (12:09):
Today I'm going to speak to you on a very
a very timely subject.
Speaker 8 (12:16):
Now that's the old Carny.
Speaker 4 (12:19):
I better get going. I'll see you over at the
lodge hall.
Speaker 8 (12:21):
Okay, Dave.
Speaker 5 (12:24):
The subject of my talk is the importance of being
on time. Yeah, don't be late.
Speaker 10 (12:47):
The time is twelve thirty five and ten seconds.
Speaker 2 (12:52):
That's right, Reggy.
Speaker 10 (12:54):
I'm here, marm. The time is twelve thirty five and.
Speaker 2 (13:01):
That's right, you sing.
Speaker 7 (13:04):
I'm just making sure the telephone company gives people the
right time.
Speaker 10 (13:10):
The time is twelve thirty five and thirty seconds. That's right.
The operator hasn't made.
Speaker 2 (13:16):
A mistake yet.
Speaker 8 (13:19):
I've got a pretty good watch, too.
Speaker 2 (13:22):
Well, how about hanging up now somebody may be trying
to call us.
Speaker 10 (13:26):
Okay, the time is twelve thirty five and forty seconds.
Speaker 2 (13:31):
That's right. Move over there. I want to plug in
the vacuum cleaner.
Speaker 7 (13:35):
This is really a swell watch. I'll bet I'm never
late for anything again.
Speaker 2 (13:39):
That's fine. Never late else, and they're gonna call me,
that's fine, dear. Yeah, I wish I had something to
do today so I could be on.
Speaker 7 (13:45):
Time for it. I want me to stick around you
in case you want to know what time it is.
Speaker 2 (13:50):
No, thanks, dear, I'm sure that won't be necessary. That's funny.
What's the matter, I don't know. Something needs to be
wrong with a vacuum cleaner.
Speaker 5 (14:00):
Can I read telling to you? What's that other talk?
I'm going to give it a lunch in this note.
See how this sounds. Since the beginning of time, men
have been late. How do you like that?
Speaker 2 (14:13):
Oh, it's very good. It's a short speech, but to
the point.
Speaker 5 (14:17):
No, no, no, no, this more as if you didn't know.
That's just my opening little joke, so to speak. A
little smile.
Speaker 2 (14:25):
Oh, I thought you're only going to say a few words.
Judging from that manuscript in your hand, you prepared quite
a sermon.
Speaker 5 (14:31):
No, no, this is just a rough draft. Naturally, I
plan to go over it and cut out one or
two pages.
Speaker 2 (14:36):
Well don't you think you better hurry? What time to
lunch and start? Oh?
Speaker 5 (14:39):
Not until one o'clock at plenty of time. It's only
eleven thirty.
Speaker 7 (14:43):
That clock isn't right, Pop, Well, of course.
Speaker 5 (14:45):
It's right, Ricky. It's an electric clock.
Speaker 2 (14:47):
I'm afraid it's wrong.
Speaker 8 (14:48):
Pop.
Speaker 2 (14:49):
I know, I got a watch. You can take Ricky's
word for it, Dear. He's been listening to the time
signal for the last half hour.
Speaker 5 (14:55):
But that clock always keeps perfect time. It says eleven
thirty right on the nose. I mean, he said eleven
thirty a couple of minutes ago. And I walked in
here too.
Speaker 2 (15:06):
He said, eleven thirty an hour ago.
Speaker 5 (15:10):
Man, let me take a look. Well, no, wonder this
clock has stopped, Harriot.
Speaker 2 (15:14):
Or something must be wrong with the power. The vacuum
cleaner won't work either.
Speaker 5 (15:17):
Well, what are you supposed to happen?
Speaker 2 (15:19):
Could it have been something you did when you were
fixing the porch light?
Speaker 5 (15:23):
Well, what could I have done? It's a very simple operation.
You turn off the electricity, fixed the light and turn
on the veal. You no, I'll tell you what I
could have done. I could have forgotten to turn the
electricity back on again. Go on, that's exactly what happened.
Speaker 2 (15:44):
Well, I wouldn't get upset about it. It's nothing serious.
Speaker 5 (15:46):
Oh, holy smokes, I just thought of something. If that
clock is stopped, what time is it?
Speaker 2 (15:50):
Would you like me to tell you?
Speaker 5 (15:52):
Please do at the tone, Ricky? What time is it?
Speaker 2 (15:56):
Ten minutes to one?
Speaker 8 (15:57):
Oh?
Speaker 5 (15:58):
Well that guse me exactly ten minutes to get I
ain't up shaved and get dressed.
Speaker 2 (16:01):
Get off the.
Speaker 5 (16:01):
Lodge auditorium, Harriet. I can't possibly make it.
Speaker 2 (16:05):
We'll just get over there as soon as.
Speaker 5 (16:06):
You can Oh, this is gonna be very embarrassing. I
show up late and give a talk on the importance
of being on time.
Speaker 2 (16:14):
You've only got nine minutes and thirty seconds now, Pop,
Come on, dere. If you hurry, you won't be too late.
Those luncheons never start on time anyway.
Speaker 5 (16:21):
This will probably be the first one that ever did well.
Speaker 6 (16:24):
The longer you wait, the later you're gonna be nine
minutes and five seconds pop.
Speaker 2 (16:28):
It seems to me I'm more starling nine minutes and three.
Speaker 5 (16:31):
Seconds Okay, Okay, I'm going.
Speaker 2 (16:43):
Ozzy. Are you ready yet? I'll be right there. You've
got one minute and five seconds POP coming coming. You
better hurry. Well, believe me, I am one minute pop.
Speaker 5 (16:53):
Okay, I'm ready. I didn't have time to shave, but
I think I look all right.
Speaker 2 (16:55):
You look fine there.
Speaker 5 (16:56):
Here, Well, you fix my couple links while I put
on my tie thirty seconds. You know, maybe I shouldn't
even go to that darn luncheon now, Harriet.
Speaker 2 (17:05):
You've got to go, dear. They're expecting you to speak.
Speaker 5 (17:09):
Yes, thank you, Ricky.
Speaker 2 (17:10):
You can't let David down.
Speaker 5 (17:12):
I've already let him down. Hey, maybe we could call
and say I'm sick. We well you could call. Oh no,
well you've got to, Harry, and I'm much too sick
to call. Yes, Ricky, you're late. Probably somebody calling from
(17:37):
the lotch hall tell whoever it is. I just left, Harriet.
Speaker 2 (17:40):
Well, go ahead and then I'll be telling the truth.
Speaker 5 (17:44):
No, never let it ring. They've got a lot of
nerve hounding a man just because he's a few minutes.
Speaker 2 (17:50):
Late, one minute and eighteen seconds late, to be exactly,
you got a good going.
Speaker 8 (17:54):
Dear, Harried.
Speaker 5 (17:56):
I can't face those.
Speaker 2 (17:57):
People now, but you've got to. Maybe I'm better answer
the phone.
Speaker 5 (18:01):
No, no, no, just leave it alone. I know I'm late.
They don't have to call just to tell me that
I've got a son with a watch.
Speaker 2 (18:09):
Here's your coad.
Speaker 5 (18:12):
Hey, wait a minute, this may work out after all.
Speaker 7 (18:15):
I'm late, right right, two minutes in thinteen seconds.
Speaker 5 (18:18):
Thank you. I'm late to a luncheon where I'm going
to talk on the importance of being on time. Do
you see what I'm driving on, Harriet? No, Well, I'm
going to be the example of what happens when you're late.
Speaker 8 (18:29):
Do you get it? No?
Speaker 5 (18:31):
Well, look, by being late, I point up exactly what
I'm talking about. I'm a graphic illustration of my speech.
I'm the horrible example of the confusion and the embarrassment
that occurs.
Speaker 8 (18:42):
When a man is late.
Speaker 2 (18:44):
Oh no, I see.
Speaker 5 (18:45):
Do you like the idea? No, but you can take
my word for Harriet. This is brilliant. Not brilliant, but
it's a good way to worm out of an embarrassing situation.
Speaker 2 (18:57):
I guess it's a pretty good idea that hadn't you
better hurry?
Speaker 5 (19:00):
No, the later I am now, the better.
Speaker 2 (19:05):
See.
Speaker 5 (19:06):
The perfect dramatic effect is for me to arrive just
after they've finished lunch mister Hendricks, and the chairman rises,
looks around the hall in a bewildered sort of a way,
taps on his water glass, and he says, gentlemen, I
can't imagine what's happened to our first speaker for today.
Speaker 8 (19:27):
This is brilliant, Harriet.
Speaker 9 (19:46):
Gentlemen, I am can't imagine what's happened to our first
speaker for today.
Speaker 8 (19:50):
It's all right, sir, here I am.
Speaker 5 (19:52):
I'm here now. Thank goodness, we were getting worried. Gentlemen,
I have committed an un forgivable act. I have been
late for this important luncheon thirty minutes late. To be exact,
there is no excuse for my thunlesness. By being late,
I have not only caused a lot of confusion, but
(20:15):
I have inconvenienced.
Speaker 2 (20:16):
All of you.
Speaker 5 (20:17):
Oh that's perfectly all right, we understand.
Speaker 2 (20:20):
No, no, no, it isn't all right.
Speaker 5 (20:22):
It's a terrible thing to do. Now I must apologize naturally.
This is as embarrassing to me as it is embarrassing
to you. Believe me, gentlemen, I sincerely and humbly apologize
for my rudeness. Now you have just witnessed what happens
when a man is late. Confusion, inconvenience, and embarrassment for
(20:44):
all concerns. Now, I can tell you that this was
my way of illustrating the subject. I'm going to speak
on the importance of being on tire.
Speaker 2 (20:57):
I hope you'll forgive.
Speaker 5 (20:58):
This rather dramatic processor, Professor, I beg your pardon. I
hate to interrupt, but I thought you were speaking on
Plato today. Well, no, David told me you were very
happy with my choice of subject. David's David, Well, that's
my son, mister Hendrickson. Mister Hendrickson, who's mister Hendrickson. Why
aren't you mister Hendrickson.
Speaker 2 (21:18):
Oh no, no, I'm doctor Peppin.
Speaker 5 (21:20):
Who you clim, Ozzie Nelson? You mean you aren't Professor Higgins. No,
I'm sure I'm Ozen you mean you are, mister Hendrickson.
Speaker 2 (21:28):
I'm doctor Peppin.
Speaker 5 (21:29):
Where's mister Hendrickson? I don't know what's Professor Higgins? I
don't know where am i all at the semi annual
luncheon of the Plochlian Literary Society. You mean this isn't
the luncheon for the High School Athletic Association? Of course not.
Now what have you done with Professor Higgins.
Speaker 9 (21:48):
Scoring my possible delay that I got here just as
soon as possible, mister Hendrickson, No, doctor Peppin, I'm doctor Peppin.
Speaker 4 (21:56):
I'm Professor Higgins.
Speaker 5 (21:57):
Blymizie Nelson, have you seen mister Hendrickson? Hey, Papa, I've
been looking.
Speaker 2 (22:10):
All over the lobby for you.
Speaker 5 (22:12):
David. Where is everybody?
Speaker 8 (22:13):
Well?
Speaker 4 (22:14):
The luncheon had to be postponed until two thirty?
Speaker 5 (22:16):
Well what happened?
Speaker 2 (22:17):
I don't know.
Speaker 4 (22:18):
Somebody got the plans all mixed up.
Speaker 6 (22:19):
Some literary societies using the dining room, right, now, yes,
I know I've met them.
Speaker 4 (22:25):
I phoned the house, but nobody was home.
Speaker 5 (22:27):
Oh then you are the one who called. Yeah, how
come you didn't answer? Well, I'd already gone.
Speaker 8 (22:33):
Oh huh.
Speaker 5 (22:38):
Well it's hard to explain, David. This has been a
very frantic day so far, real crazy.
Speaker 4 (22:44):
Yeah, your head.
Speaker 6 (22:45):
The luncheon starts in an hour, so we better get going.
Speaker 4 (22:47):
Pop, We'll have to hurry too.
Speaker 1 (22:50):
Wait a minute, we'd.
Speaker 4 (22:51):
Better get going where where everybody else is gone?
Speaker 5 (22:54):
Only to get some lunch.
Speaker 4 (22:55):
I can't wait until two thirty to eat.
Speaker 5 (22:57):
Oh oh home?
Speaker 2 (22:59):
Huh?
Speaker 5 (22:59):
Yeah, I suppose you lead the way, David. I'm not
sure I can find.
Speaker 3 (23:04):
It, mister Burnsmith saying, Tune in again next week for
another transcribed adventure of Ozzie and Harriet, starring Ozzie Nelson
and Harriet Hillard. This is the United States Armed Forces
(24:20):
Radio Service
Speaker 8 (25:00):
In s
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