“Paint Nails. Punch Nazis. Pack Lunches.” – Redefining Dad Goals with Jonathan Greg - Radical Joy with James Bullard

Episode Transcript
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Speaker 1 (00:10):
Hello, friends, So happy to have you here with me
today at Radical Joy. If you've been here before, welcome back.
If this is your first time with us, well we're
glad you're here. Each week, we're here with you talking
to ourselves about things that weigh on our minds and hearts,
hoping if you're dealing with something similar, we can adjust
our perspectives as you listen. Hey, if you're struggling with
something that needs immediate attention, please know that help is available,

(00:33):
just asle nine eight eight nationwide in the US to
reach the Mental Health and Suicide Crisis Hotline. All of
us here at Covelu Studios believe that mental health is
a vital part of our well being. The more people
we meet and the more places we go, the more
we realize how important it is to make people aware
of the fact that there is no shame in enjoying

(00:54):
the parts of our lives that are incredible. It's time
for some radical Joy, and this week, the three fingers
pointing back at us are for Jonathan greg Jonathan lives
in New York with his wife and two children. When
he's not dadding, he spends his days working as the
director of operations for a spirit's portfolio, which is a
fancy way of saying he oversees booze getting out into

(01:14):
bottles and sent to stores. He spends his free time
doing stand up comedy and making content for social media.
His content centers around punching Nazis, perfecting the Dutch braid,
and offering tips for painting your nails. After all, you
cannot spell manicure without man. You can follow him at
Jay Greg that's two g's underscore Jonathan, and we'll make

(01:36):
sure to put all of that in the show.

Speaker 2 (01:38):
Notes.

Speaker 1 (01:38):
Ladies and gentlemen, please help me. Welcome mister Jonathan Greg.

Speaker 2 (01:43):
Hello, Hello, hey body man.

Speaker 1 (01:46):
Oh my god, it's great to have you on the show.
Thank you so much for coming to join us. Jonathan
and I have known each other for a long time.
We work together in a fine dining establishment in New
York City, directly across the street from Carnegie Hall, and
it was a sad day when and outgrew that position
and moved on to bigger and better and flashier and
funner along the way. It's been so great to watch

(02:06):
his progress because not only is he wildly successful in
entertainment as well as film and television, his stand up
career is fantastic, and his presence in social media not
only has a tremendous following, but the message he puts
out to the world is absolutely incredible. I continue to
marvel and awe at the good he has, the potential

(02:27):
and continues to put out into the world. So, without
getting too deep in here, what I would love to
say is just thank you for what it is you're doing,
because I think that what you have to offer is
what a lot of people are really jumping on board with.
Especially now.

Speaker 3 (02:45):
What's so funny about that is, I don't know why
you just read the notes I had to say about you.

Speaker 2 (02:49):
I don't know, I don't know how you got a
hold of that copy.

Speaker 3 (02:53):
But no, it's funny to hear that and think about
my own perspective and how it is nice to hear
those things because you know, for the years, the million
years since we met, a lot of it was just
throwing stuff on the wall, trying to see if I
could make anything work here in New York. And then
you know, in the past few years, something that actually
meant more to me has kind of kind of latched

(03:14):
and clearly the most success and we could debate the
term success all day long, but the most success that
I've found seems to be in these arenas where I
really feel connected to it, not just as an actor performer,
but like actually my own spear of my own self
coming through it, which you know, I guess is what
they've always said to us, if you can connect to it,

(03:34):
and I think that you're an embodiment of that as well.
When you can connect to it is where it's going
to take off.

Speaker 1 (03:39):
Agree, And that's the thing, Like people, we continue to
say these things, and yeah, we've had a million teachers
and mentors that have said exactly the same thing. If
you can really connect, if you can find that authenticity,
that sincerity, is whenever you can expect everything to start
to happen. And we keep trying to fit ourselves into
a role because that's what pays the bills. And then

(03:59):
now with the advance of social media into the mainstream
entertainment sphere, is much easier to be exactly who you
are and say what you want and people really connect
with it because it's clear that that is the message
that you would put on the earth to send.

Speaker 2 (04:15):
Yeah.

Speaker 3 (04:15):
Yeah, it's funny to look at when I look at
my performance career versus social media, and the combination of
those two really my first. You know, I've been an
actor in New York for twenty years, and for most
of that time social media. For I don't know half
that time, social media existed, and everyone from agents to
casting directors to producers would.

Speaker 2 (04:34):
Say, you need to have a footprint, you need to
have a following.

Speaker 3 (04:37):
We need that presence for you to make a difference,
for you to make any kind of slash on our
side of things. And so for years I was just
throwing stuff at the wall. I was always trying to
find something that would latch and something that would hook,
and something that would grab people. And then I'm not kidding,
and we can get in the weeds about this or not,
but I am not kidding that when the week before
my first reel, which was the Fall of twenty or

(05:00):
two years ago, but I don't know what year it is,
but two years ago in the fall, the first time
I had a reel that went viral was I'm not kidding.
A week after I had decided that I was gonna
kind of retire from acting. I was going to take
a real break so that I could focus on my
kids and focus.

Speaker 2 (05:14):
On the family.

Speaker 3 (05:15):
And I'd had years of being a successful actor to
the degree that I had a lot of fun and
been on some cool sets and done some cool productions.
But I think inarguably you could see that I was
a financially unsuccessful actor.

Speaker 2 (05:28):
I needed to do something else.

Speaker 3 (05:29):
They brought in some more money for my family and
could change my perspective of the family. And I really,
I'm not kidding. Like the week that I finally got
my head around the idea that I could step away
from the business for a minute, and I was okay
doing that, and I was really okay letting go. Three
days after I had that full, full conversation with myself,
I had a reel with you know, I don't know,

(05:50):
a couple hundred thousand views and I picked up ten
thousand followers overnight. And then I just went from there
and I thought, well, I mean, okay, all right, I
guess I'm still here in the good news, like you said,
the good news about that was I got.

Speaker 2 (06:01):
To do my own stuff. And since then it's been me.

Speaker 3 (06:03):
You know, There's been plenty of ups and downs and
backs and forths and all the things that go with
any kind of production of any kind at all.

Speaker 2 (06:10):
But it has been really uh.

Speaker 3 (06:12):
It's it's felt really fulfilling for me to actually get
to do my own stuff with my own voice, produced.

Speaker 2 (06:20):
By me, directed by me. If it goes out great,
if it doesn't great, it's it's up to it's up
to me. You know. That's been the fun part of
it for sure.

Speaker 1 (06:26):
Yes, And it is so fun to watch for many
reasons because there is this wonderful, wholesome, lighthearted side that
has just a little bit of healthy competition and just
a little bit of fear in it. The stuff that
you put out about learning to style your daughter's hair
is so fun the way, plus the kid has like

(06:51):
amazing delivery. The timing on your daughter just boggles my
mind is like wow, I've known people that have been
class as an improv for years that couldn't give that
of response in that sort of timing. That was beautiful.
But like, could you let our listeners in on a
little bit of that story, because I I it's you
could tell us so much better than I ever tried.

Speaker 3 (07:11):
Sure, well, so that that first reel that I mentioned
that that went viral, it was just about it was
kind of generational stuff.

Speaker 2 (07:18):
I was kind of kind of.

Speaker 3 (07:19):
Mocking our grandparents, the boomers of the world, kind of
the grandparents of the world.

Speaker 2 (07:23):
Having two small children, I was kind of.

Speaker 3 (07:27):
Sarcastically and parodying the idea that we are now raising
soft grandparents.

Speaker 2 (07:33):
And you know, that was its own thing, and that.

Speaker 3 (07:34):
Was funny, and I got made a splash. And then
after I made that splash, I thought, well, cool, now
I have an audience. Let's see what else I can do.
And I was just throwing out some thoughts and some
things that I had had in mind. And then again
the thing that was like most felt most authentic. And yeah,
I put some some performance. I put some storytelling to
it and some performance to it. But the truth is,
my daughter at the time was in a two year

(07:56):
old class at a Montessori school here in New York,
and her teacher, Miss Shilanda, is this Ecuadorian woman and
she's a lovely, lovely woman.

Speaker 2 (08:04):
But I was always the drop off and pick up parent.
My wife works.

Speaker 3 (08:08):
She her job starts before they go to school and
ends after they get done with school, so I'm responsible
for pick up and drop off. And I just didn't
want to be the kind of dad who sends a
daughter to school with ratty hair, And I think that
it as a quick side note, it fits great into
what you do here, because like I've never understood men
who need their lawn to look perfect and they need

(08:28):
their car to be washed, but they don't care about
their kid's hair.

Speaker 2 (08:31):
Like you don't.

Speaker 3 (08:32):
You can't take time to learn how to brush hair
and do a ponytail, and like God forbid, you step
it up a little and learn how to braid hair.
You know, So I had I had done that, I'd
put some time in to do my daughter's hair, and
I had fun with it because I wanted her going.

Speaker 2 (08:43):
To school looking nice. And then.

Speaker 3 (08:49):
So what happened is I picked her up one day
and she also my daughter. You're not kidding about her timing.
She has a comedic timing. She also has a creative
imagination and uses that to the degree that some people
might call it lying, But when you're a two or
three year old brain, I don't.

Speaker 2 (09:04):
Think you call it lying.

Speaker 3 (09:05):
You just call it creative thinking, right, creative storytelling. So
she would tell some interesting stories at school some days,
and Missilanda would sometimes fact check those with me after school,
and often my daughter was just making up some kind
of creative storytelling in the process. But one day I
picked her up and Misschilande, with the most incrediled, incredited,

(09:27):
dul it incredulous tone in her voice, she said, so,
Sydney today said that Dad did her hair and it
was like a pretty nice little braid. And I said,
Dad did do her hair, and she was like, oh, okay, sorry.
But then from that moment on, when I would go,
I would do something phone in her hair and I
go pick Sydney up from school and it would be redone,

(09:50):
you know, a much nicer double French braid or you
know Tiara French or like an asymmetric Dutch, you know whatever.
And I was like, it was really kind of throw
me off, and I found it hard to believe that
this wasn't Yolanda uh kind of checking me and making sure,
you know, making sure that I was tumbled in this process,

(10:11):
that I wasn't getting too make my breeches. And it
became its own thing that I would send her to
school with one hairsil which look, the truth is, Yolanda
was way better at doing hair that she's She's a
woman who's been doing hair entire life, and she's great
at it. And also the truth is I love that
she would do it. What you know, what was happening
is my daughter would take a nap or be wild

(10:31):
on the playground or whatever, and her hair would get
all messed up, and so instead of having just a
rat's nest when she came home, Yolanda would would fix
her hair for But I did notice that Yolanda always
liked to pump it up a little bit and really
set her home with an improved hairstyle, which I personal affront.

Speaker 1 (10:48):
To hear you speak about this on your socials is
hysterical because Sydney's in the back and she's like, you're
in the front, you know, trying to play it really
really cool, but we can see your face like, so,
who did your hair?

Speaker 2 (11:03):
Yeah?

Speaker 3 (11:03):
And that's really It's funny because the original Michilanda, you know,
real was pretty big a guy a couple million views,
but the one that really got I want to say,
and I'm making this up, I could be totally wrong.
I want to say eleven plus million views at this point.

Speaker 2 (11:17):
Is exactly that.

Speaker 3 (11:18):
It's just me sitting in the front seat finding out
that it's not just Michialanda who does the hair.

Speaker 2 (11:22):
It's also Miss Kimberly.

Speaker 3 (11:23):
And so just just over and over my daughter just saying,
I said, who did you hear Miss Kimberly.

Speaker 2 (11:30):
So now I got too. I'm gonna deal with now
I got.

Speaker 1 (11:32):
We got too?

Speaker 3 (11:33):
Yeah, yeah, no rest for the weird man.

Speaker 2 (11:37):
I can't let you down for a moment.

Speaker 1 (11:41):
And that's the thing. And I love that so much
because you touched on it and I want to come
back on it and just kind of dig in it
just a little bit more. If a man is so
incredibly focused on making sure that his long is perfect
or his car is always immaculated, these kind of things,
why in the world would you not saying his offering
in the world the very best condition that he could.
It's one of those things where it's ownership, not your children,
clearly because there are their own people, but ownership of

(12:02):
the fact that they're they're in my charge and people
out there they are. I want to make sure that
I send them out to the world as well prepared
as a possibly clean and can, including the way they
look and yeah, dad can work a Dutch braid. Help
me out, what are some of these because you mentions.
I was like, these sound fantastic. They sound like bread.

Speaker 2 (12:20):
The French, the French and the Dutch are basically the
same thing.

Speaker 3 (12:23):
It's when it's pulled back bit by bit along the way,
not just one thing at the back, but the French
goes over the top.

Speaker 2 (12:28):
And Dutch goes underneath.

Speaker 3 (12:29):
So as the braid goes, you can look at it
and you can see which is which kind of The
Viking braid is an under it's a it's a flip underneath.

Speaker 2 (12:35):
The plates as you were, the plate would be an
underneath plate. The French plate is an over the top plate.
I'm not great at either of them, but I have
been working on them.

Speaker 1 (12:43):
Buddy. All I'm asking is the effort, and it is
clear that it is there, and I love it. It
is wonderful, and you know, it's it's that bonding thing too,
like whenever you take that care, that time it resonates.
Now she's very young, she can't necessarily tell you about that,
but I can promise you the thing that matters most
is the time that you put into it. And that's amazing, and.

Speaker 3 (13:06):
That's really the truth at the at the end of
the Yeah, sure, it's really fun. That it took off
on social media, and I have a lot of fun
with it, and I really do like doing I like,
like you said, I like sending my kids out to
the world as representatives of themselves. They can't do their
own hair yet they need help with that, so I
want to make sure they're looking good and that they
feel confident on the world. But also, like you said,
this is this is the long con for me, right, Like,
I want first of all, both of my kids.

Speaker 2 (13:27):
I have a son and a daughter. I want both
of them.

Speaker 3 (13:29):
Seeing that dads can do hair, and I want to
have that bond available with my daughter.

Speaker 2 (13:33):
And I don't want to put it all on mom's shoulders.

Speaker 3 (13:35):
I don't want it to be a thing that only
mom can do and she's responsible for all the time.
And also I want to have that opportunity later in life,
you know, if there's a if there's a time that whatever,
she's a teenager and needs her hair done and dad
can do that, Like I think that's a that's the
thing I want to make sure. So I'm practicing along
the way with the intent of having a you know,
an older daughter who still knows that I can do

(13:57):
her hair. That's that's the reasoning behind all of it.
And like you were saying about the you know, the
the toxic, more toxic side of masculinity. I think part
of the problem, and really one of the problems across
the board with that is that it's so short sighted,
and it really is, it's so boxed in. So you
have these ideas of these ideas of like you said,
like taking pride in something, but not something that's woman's

(14:20):
work or not something that like might might be on
the edge of your sexual preferences or whatever for some
kind of label that's been around for a long time.
So it's just like to me, most of the toxicity
is based in like being able to see exactly where
evolution and progression stopped, and someone who's not interested in
learning more and not interested in growing, because it's it's

(14:40):
all the same like pride, pride in what you do, competition,
you know, all of those things are the same the
same route. I'm I'm I've got an angry streak that
I'm always working on.

Speaker 2 (14:51):
I am a competitive dude, but I.

Speaker 3 (14:53):
Don't mind exploring that in a fun way and not
keeping it so tight and so bound by these by
these I don't know regressive parameters that I can't get
bigger than that. And I think it's frankly, I when
I started, kind of when my following grew and grew,
I was getting a little nervous about you know, there's
imposter syndrome that comes in and then there's like the
chance to make money off of it.

Speaker 2 (15:13):
Then it feels exploitative and it's it's a weird kind
of place to be.

Speaker 3 (15:17):
Except I realized, no, I'm gonna own this as best
I can, because what I'm doing is capitalizing on, maybe
even exploiting, but capitalizing on those extra steps that other
regressive thinking men can't take. So, yeah, my lawn looks great,
but I can't compete with all the guys on their
what their lawns look like.

Speaker 2 (15:36):
But if you're gonna.

Speaker 3 (15:36):
If I, if I have the chance to play in
a whole new ballgame that no one else is playing,
and great, now, I'm I mean I think that we
all know too that dads catch a big break, a
dad who is engaged and all of a sudden the
super dad because the standards for so long have been
so so out of balance, just so out of balance. Yeah,
so frankly, yeah, my my insta I think it still
says my Instagram page bio says. Monetizing the weakness of

(16:02):
men or capitalizing on the weakness of men, No, weaponizing
weaponizing the weakness of men, That's what it is. There
are these spots that if you just if you don't
sit in a regressive thinking pattern, there's opportunity. There's golden
in our hills, you know, like it's ripe for expansion,
and too many dudes are just too afraid to take

(16:23):
those steps.

Speaker 2 (16:24):
And so I'll do it.

Speaker 1 (16:26):
Amen. Well, and that's the thing too, Like just from
let me just go off on my little tangent here.
The esthetic that you have is also very much a
dude like you are so much that person you have
been for me for years, and so for you to
walk into this and like, look, I don't care what
the rest of you were thinking about this. This is
what I'm doing because I care about my family, and

(16:47):
I care about my children a lot more than I
care about my own ideas that may or may not
be antiquated about my own masculinity and how I present.
Not to mention, what you're showing these men on how
to be better men is great what you are teaching
your daughter about gender roles and how much of that
is so much made up fluff BS is the most

(17:09):
important part. Maybe you talk about it, maybe you don't.
There's always so much more impact in action than there
will ever be in words. Words are cheap, and I
know that is a hoot coming from somebody like me
who can breathe through his eyelids to continue speaking. Actions
always stand out and stand stronger than anything that you
tell your children, especially at that age.

Speaker 3 (17:31):
Well, just to respect a little bit, you you walk
your talk through and through, so you are great at
the talk, but you also walk it.

Speaker 2 (17:39):
So just don't sell yourself at all short on that.
Thank you.

Speaker 1 (17:43):
I appreciate that. And while we're talking about these children,
I love what you're doing to show up for Sydney.
But now one thing that really strikes hard and strikes
deep with me is the fact what you're doing for
your son or as you know, inspiration through your son
your paint Nails and punch Nazis campaign. If it's okay

(18:05):
to call it that, I am all on board. We're
both wearing our shirts today for anybody who's looking. Yeah,
I got one of the first I'm very excited about
it as soon as I saw that on his social
media's like, I need to own that yesterday, And honestly,
I was kind of surprised that it got to me
as quickly as it did me being in the Netherlands.
But wow, yeah, so yeah, please take it away. Let's

(18:29):
tell us more about that. I am rapped.

Speaker 3 (18:33):
Well so, and I guess it's a little bit later,
but it is. Yeah, I recognize that I present. I'm
from Alabama, just like you. You know, we're from the
deep deep, and so there's you know, growing up, I
was not looked at as the masculine kid.

Speaker 2 (18:46):
Look.

Speaker 3 (18:47):
Growing up, I was a kid who did theater. I
was a kid who took dance class. I also played sports.
But because I did those other things at all, there
was no chance to recognize the duality or multiplicity of
life at that time.

Speaker 2 (18:58):
You know, you had to hold one thing and that
was it.

Speaker 3 (19:01):
You could not balance two truths at the same time
at that at that point. So yeah, sure I played sports,
but I also did theater, which put me on the
edge of masculinity, on the on the back side of
being masculine, and and also like I bucked against that
for a long time because I hated that part of it,
So I kind of also bucked against the entirety of
masculinity as it is portrayed in the South. So the

(19:22):
mainly anythings. And as I got older and as I
was away from the toxic parts of that for longer
there was, I was away from the angrier and the
more scared parts of that, I realized I love driving
a jeep. I love cutting my grass. I love having
multiple grills that do different things. You know, like there's
some and like not not even evolved, sof like yeah,

(19:42):
like base level masculine stuff that I really enjoy. I've
just been able to untether that from the fear that
all the and not even fully on tether to be clear,
like I recognize it. I recognize so many of the
things I get angry about are just am a place
of fear. Fear of losing what little bit of possession
I think I fear of, you know, really of having

(20:04):
the biggest fear is that my fears of myself are
going to be validated by someone else, so that I
am when I think someone is telling me that I'm
not worthy. Frankly, it happens with my kids all the time.
When they talk back to me, I still go through
the trigger of you know, now I've been able to
break it down and I can tell more systemically, but
in the quick reaction in my head is that I'm
being confronted and I'm being challenged and the space that

(20:27):
my being takes up is being threatened and I might
lose that and I go to snap back at them,
and then I realize, wait, man, that's just like, that's
just layers and layers of fear that have been built.

Speaker 2 (20:37):
In that I just have to like get out of
the way.

Speaker 3 (20:39):
And they're only, well not their only hope, but one
of their biggest hopes of being able to come through
this world without that is for me to not show
it to them, like you were talking about actions over words,
like that's the hardest part.

Speaker 2 (20:50):
I can talk to talk all day long. And my
son loves doing.

Speaker 3 (20:52):
My daughter's here too, so I love that we've we've
kind of bucked those norms already. And he's in public
school now and he used to love pinning his nails
with me, and he has not said anything about it
being like off the table, but he's gotten less into it,
and that's fine.

Speaker 2 (21:06):
I don't want to push him in a way to
make him uncomfortable.

Speaker 3 (21:08):
I'm just going to keep doing it myself so that
he can see a dude who frankly pops off and
yells at him sometimes, who has taught about to throw
a baseball, who smokes meat, you know, and cuts grass,
also has painted nails sometimes, and.

Speaker 2 (21:21):
All that is the nail, you know, the nail kind
of side of it.

Speaker 3 (21:24):
And I mean, I don't know, you know, as radical
joy I don't know how joyfulitics' spend too long in politics,
but it's hard to separate politics from social issues these days.
And frankly, when the election went the way it went,
I was really disappointed. I think that's speaking of how
to model for our children. I think it's a horrible
way to model anything for our children really, on any

(21:47):
side of the coin, on a moral side, on a
business side, just a horrible way to model for our children.
So I was already disappointed in that, and then inauguration
came around, and whatever you think about whatever happened, Nazis
re entered the conversation.

Speaker 2 (22:02):
All of a sudden, there were there were Nazis again.

Speaker 3 (22:05):
Whatever you want to say about any specific moment, it
is inarguable that there were.

Speaker 2 (22:09):
Nazis present again all of a sudden, and so I
it's one of those things, and this is some of that.
Probably that root.

Speaker 3 (22:17):
Masculine dow stuff too, is one of the things that
I don't always align with when it comes to progressive
thinking or liberal thinking.

Speaker 2 (22:23):
Is a is a non violent path. I'm all for
leading that way as.

Speaker 3 (22:27):
Long as possible, But I also firmly believe that Nazis
should get punched. And I don't promote promote on its
own violence. But I said, if we don't punch Nazis now,
we're gonna have to shoot them later.

Speaker 2 (22:43):
We gotta, we gotta.

Speaker 3 (22:45):
That's that's It's a group of people. And it's not
like Methodists. It's not like organ or Gunnians. You know,
it's not like a group I don't like.

Speaker 2 (22:53):
It's like no. No.

Speaker 3 (22:54):
As a group, these people have agreed to hate other
people and to use violence and fear to to stop
and to rid themselves off of other people.

Speaker 2 (23:02):
So, yeah, I got no problem punching Nazis. Per the competition.

Speaker 3 (23:06):
Yeah, then and punched Nazis. I don't know, it just
it flowed and it worked, and people seem to connect
with it.

Speaker 1 (23:11):
Buddy, do I ever? And whenever I wear this shirt
to the gym, which is often, people are always they
love it. They think oh oh, and then they think
I'm some sort of aggressive whatever. I was like, you
and I have no beef. But make no mistake, there's
a line in the sand. Should you cross it, I
promise you I will not be the instigator. I will
be the concluder. This is not punishment. This is consequences.
You made a choice, you weren't born to this. Somehow

(23:34):
along the way you learn something unacceptable. And I was
fine for years, talking and talking and talking. I am exhausted,
I am angry, and I am no longer tolerant of
that kind of horse shit. So that's just where I
stand on it, and I back you one hundred and
twelve percent on it. I'm not here to make a problem.

(23:54):
I'm here to make sure that our future generations don't
suffer from the problems that people think are okay to
present now to some of our most marginalized and exposed populations.
Not flipping having it okay.

Speaker 2 (24:07):
I'm finding that's a great way to play.

Speaker 3 (24:10):
But also, like I love that, I think one of
the reasons we connect is that we we check so
many of the same boxes that there also has been
I think a narrative created as kind of the other
side of a the toxic masculine or or just the
idea of masculinity that can bleed into toxicity.

Speaker 2 (24:27):
The other side of that is that.

Speaker 3 (24:29):
You know a liberal, soy boy, weak kind of kind
of you know someone who can be walked over some
kind of like wallflower, who has some progressive thoughts but
can't do anything to stand behind those.

Speaker 2 (24:41):
And I'm just not that person.

Speaker 3 (24:42):
I have a few pretty intense fights under my belt
throughout my lifetime, Like I got no problem standing up
for what I believe it. And again, that doesn't mean
intimidating people with the polls. It doesn't mean fighting with
someone whose political affiliation is.

Speaker 2 (24:55):
Different than mine. It means if you align yourself with
a group of people who will although whose.

Speaker 3 (25:02):
Intent is to eradicate marginalized groups of people, I've got
no problem fighting you.

Speaker 1 (25:07):
Thank you exactly it My dad taught me from a
very young age as well. Like I have not been
in a whole lot of fights. I'll be honest with you,
It's just never really anything that came up on the radar.
Ed Bullard taught me from a young agent. Look, you
may not ever be the biggest man in a fight,
which is why we never fight fair. You find something
to swing at that some bitch, he says, don't you
ever try to walk into there with fists, because nine

(25:29):
times out of ten he will put you on your butt.
You make sure you have a way to walk away.
It's like, yes, sir, all right.

Speaker 2 (25:36):
I love that I do.

Speaker 1 (25:38):
Ed Bullard has taught me so many things over the years.
I'm like, all right, great, and it's just for so
long we were taught to be good people, and for
whatever reason, not fighting also equals good people. Always look
for the peaceful way out. One hundred percent yes, And
Gosh knows, we'd love that if there was a way
to sit around a round table and have a very
earnest discussion so that everyone learns more about one another's

(25:59):
so you have no reason to come to those kind
of things. That is no longer where many of us
are any longer. So it's gonna come down to, like, okay,
you can learn the easy way or And it's the
thing that I love that you said as well about
like these layers of fear and whatnot and being whatever
people want to call like a soy boil or a

(26:21):
libtard or any other kind of things. I'm like, friend,
I'm not afraid to wash my butt because you think
it's gay to slide a bar of soap between your cheeks. Okay,
so let's just call it what it is whenever we
get down to it. That is a life led and
enforced by fear for so many little, tiny, tiny things.
Just like nobody complains about me stinking in weird spots

(26:42):
because I would never even ponder something like that, but
there are so many of those little like almost like
wives tail kind of things. Well if you do that, well,
I was like, oh, okay.

Speaker 3 (26:52):
I think we're I mean not even I think plenty
of people smarter than me are saying it. We are
dealing with the repercussions of that kind of mentality, of
that box, then that fear based mentality, because also what
it means is dudes can't have close dude friends. You
can't be physically affectionate without a man without being guy
and being guy's wrong, and like there are so many
you can't you can't even be the little.

Speaker 2 (27:12):
Spoon sometimes and meant to be held sometimes.

Speaker 3 (27:14):
Dude, you know, like and were For some reason, there's
been this this idea built around like you gotta you
gotta be a strong rock, and that the equivalent of
that is squeeze it all in, don't don't think about it,
don't show it for sure, keep it all in tight.
And to me, that is just the opposite of a
strong rock. That is that is I don't know what
tiny little scared box. And I think we see that

(27:36):
over and over again. The guys who are famous kind
of the post of children for that that style of
thinking continue to pick fights with people that weren't dealing
with them at all, like Andrew Tate trying to like
start Twitter beef with Greta Thurnberg. And then you know,
like it's like.

Speaker 2 (27:52):
What what were you doing? Man? Like why did you
need to go? Like no one was talking to you.

Speaker 3 (27:56):
You did that all on your own, Like and now
now you now you're in Romanian in prison. Well not now,
because now we have and also a scared person who
brought that scared person to America. Anyway, it's pretty much
such an easily.

Speaker 2 (28:09):
Owned mentality and somehow the only thing.

Speaker 3 (28:13):
That that kind of thinking person has been able to
do is take over and steer the narrative. And that's
what I think you're doing here to change that, and
that's what I would like to do here.

Speaker 2 (28:23):
To change it. Is like that, it's just a it's
just a.

Speaker 3 (28:26):
Total false narrative that there's strengthened that because it's only
fear and weakness.

Speaker 1 (28:30):
I agree well, And the thing that we try to
talk about this pretty frequently here as well, especially you know,
being a dude podcaster, I'm like, it is unfair and
it is probably also a huge disservice to any man
who tries to get his partner to be the end
all be all of his affection and needs in another
human being. You need to try there are certain things

(28:52):
your partner can help you with that are going to
make you a better man, a stronger, more solid human
being in an individual that is wonderful to think that
she is going to be able to put all of
herself into you and vice versa. It is unfair and
somebody more more honestly, more often than not, everybody is
going to have a problem with that because you can't
be everything to anyone. You can be a whole lot

(29:16):
you can be the sun rose and set, you cannot
be everything. And to think, some of my most incredible
friends are the ones who I would not hesitate to
squeeze the ever loving life out of them whenever I
see them, and they crush me and they it is
the contact, It is that part of us that is
just like, yes, you are wild and you are crazy
and whatever, and there's a part of you like you said,

(29:38):
and I love it. Sometimes you just want to be held.
Sometimes you just need to be the little spoon. And
there is no shame or any kind of embarrassment in
something like that. The role that you continue to be
forced into does not fit everyone at all times, and
leaving yourself open to being more, to growing past and
showing everyone like a real man just decides and tell

(30:00):
his partner and the people in his life what he
needs and he has faith that they will find someone
in that circle to help him do it. And I
think that's just a much more evolved and quite frankly
just way of looking for it, because you breed a
lot of resentment whenever you try to look for everything

(30:21):
you need out of one person, even if that is
the person who's promised to love you. For the rest
of their lives. You need folks, not just one.

Speaker 2 (30:29):
Yeah, absolutely couldn't agree more with that.

Speaker 3 (30:31):
And yeah, you're right that anytime you try to put
that all out on one person or whatever it is,
if you're not aware of your My therapist always said
feelings aren't bad. She's always she's always saying that feelings
aren't bad. Now you're responsible for what you do with
those after the fact. But feelings are feelings, and they're
neither good nor bad. So having some curiosity again, being
willing to learn, being willing to.

Speaker 2 (30:52):
Grow is such a big part of that.

Speaker 3 (30:53):
So all right, you feel something, Okay, I wonder why,
let's think about that for her, Let's spend some time
with that instead of like immediately either it down or
outwardly doing.

Speaker 2 (31:01):
Something about it.

Speaker 3 (31:03):
It's it's just so to me, it just reads as
deep inauthenticity for someone who comes that heart at something
like instead of taking a moment to wonder why you're
feeling this way? Okay, cool, feelings aren't bad, but let's
let's do some detective work and figure out why I'm
feeling this way and what is it?

Speaker 2 (31:20):
You know?

Speaker 3 (31:20):
And nine, it's a it's a lifelong thing. It's something
that you know, like I can. I can trace so
many things back to when I was a kid, and
not in like a not in like a therapy, you know,
like blame the parents, la in the mom kind of way,
but just literally honestly like looking back at it and
going like, oh, yeah, these are defenses I've put in
place when I was a kid, and they were necessary then.

(31:40):
They were things that got me through social situations at school,
like maybe it was at home, whatever it is like there,
and it could be little things, the tiny little things
that are just the way that I my perspective works
now and the way that I react to things. Oh,
now I can see that was a defense put in
place for something that is no longer a threat to me.
So I can I can work on doing away with that.
I don't need that defense anymore. And now that defense

(32:02):
just gets in my way when something triggers that same
fight or flight kind of thing. When my kids pop
off at me. It is not the same thing as
getting bullied in high school. It feels the same, and
the lizard brain, you know, triggers the same, but it's
not the same thing. And I can look at that
and go oh. The reason a four year old can
make me so mad is because what a four year
old's doing is sounding like a seventeen year old who's

(32:24):
bullying me, and it makes me scared. But this is
not a seventeen year old. This is a four year old,
and I can unravel that so as to most of
the time not pop off at my kids the way
that my instinct tells me to most of the time.

Speaker 1 (32:37):
Exactly. Well, And a friend of mine, he and I
were talking, and it's just like, you know, you had
that lizard brain, that initial kick in moment, like that
knee jerk that reflects, and then you got the second thought.
The first thing is what someone else put in there,
whether it's a bully or a you know, a parent
that gave you a hassle about a specific situation or whatever.
And then the second thing you do is what the

(32:58):
work that you have done, what you've into it to
make sure that you continue to move forward and grow
through it. Because you know there's a problem, because you
you know, lash out it's something that has nothing to
do with it, something that you mentioned about your kids
as well as these you know, these kids that we
had to deal with whenever we were in high school.
I don't honestly think there was any malice in it.
It was just the way they were raised.

Speaker 2 (33:19):
Was it pleasant?

Speaker 1 (33:20):
No? Was it any kind of kind not at all.
Was it somebody that really wanted to hurt me and
do bad by me? No, it was just probably them
dealing with their own insecurity and better to like, look
at the guy who sings in dances instead of worrying
about me because I'm not as good on the field
as I hope I could be at this mall. Support
that will mean nothing to me in five years, but
right now it is the center of my universe.

Speaker 3 (33:41):
Cool defenses have built that their parents are only going
to love them if they can do that or whatever it.

Speaker 2 (33:45):
Is, you know exactly.

Speaker 1 (33:47):
It's either the truth or it's a perception. Either way,
it might as well be the same thing in their minds,
And so I'm going to give them grace. It's not
going to keep me from getting bigger and better in
my later years and be smarter human being.

Speaker 2 (33:58):
Yeah, yeah, well I love that.

Speaker 1 (34:01):
Oh, thanks, Bud. Now along these same kind of lines,
I would love to say, I'm thrilled that you're here
with this on radical Joy. You and I have talked
about this on many an occasion, and I really hope
that at some point in the very in near future
you will also be doing a podcast because I love
hearing you talk on these topics number one. Two, I
think your takes on them are absolutely fantastic. And three,

(34:22):
I would love to see them in a little more
like current event situation. Once you put your socials out there,
they're there forever, and some of them are a little
bit newer than others, and you get little pops from
something from a couple of years back. In a podcast,
it's just a little bit more current. Are there plans
on the horizon for something like that? If not, would
you please consider it more seriously for me? Because I

(34:43):
love what you have to say about so many of
these things.

Speaker 3 (34:46):
Thanks man, I appreciate that, and I frankly I really
respect your take because you do such a great job
with this one. Yes, so I think that I can
blame the lack of productivity so far on things one
is some of that fear, some of like it will
people listen? Is it actually gonna matter? Or is it
just me being you know, self aggrandizing? And I I

(35:09):
am closer to being able to feel like and I
guess I can't convince myself people need to hear it.
But I have been gotten closer to convincing myself. Well,
they don't listen.

Speaker 2 (35:18):
Who cares. It's there's really no downside to it. There's
no nothing.

Speaker 3 (35:21):
No one's gonna tar and feather me for doing a podcast.
I don't think it's gonna be a major problem. If
it ends up a tree falling in the woods with
no one around, that's fine. There's really no no harm there.
The other thing, and to be totally honest is just
my adult add is just like it. Some days I
have the hardest time keeping anything straight. And so, like

(35:45):
you know, I need a great producer like you have.
So maybe maybe she wants to talk to me at.

Speaker 2 (35:49):
Some point, But like I have, I've got idea.

Speaker 3 (35:53):
My best friend Tom and I he's he's a guy
here in New York and he's gay, and we're working
on a podcast together about just like just us as
friends talking and chatting things out and current events kind
of like you're saying.

Speaker 2 (36:04):
And I've worked on I've played.

Speaker 3 (36:06):
With in my own brain some some solo stuff, and
you know, I've been inspired by you some interview stuff
and some other.

Speaker 2 (36:14):
Kind of stuff like this.

Speaker 3 (36:16):
I mean, honestly, it's like you can go back through
it's the exact same things. If you go through my socials,
you just see like I do, they're all one office here.
They are like overall themes that kind of whatever will
come back up, for sure, but there's not really except
for Yolanda since Landa, there's not really storytelling that goes
on because I just lose the thread.

Speaker 2 (36:35):
Like I'll start a thing, I'll be like, oh, I'm
gonna do a series on whatever.

Speaker 3 (36:38):
You know, I'm gonna do this new series on I
don't know, on movies I've watched, and I'm gonna just
whatever I don't know.

Speaker 2 (36:43):
And I just I just lose the thread. I just lose.

Speaker 3 (36:46):
Like even with the merch like the shirts and stuff,
which by the way, just real quick to give a plug.

Speaker 2 (36:52):
All of the profits go.

Speaker 3 (36:53):
To we donate to difference like I's kind of smaller
organizations and so this month and got some stuff going
to I don't have the in front of me.

Speaker 2 (37:00):
I'll send it to you maybe can put it in
the copy. But the Center for Autism Awareness.

Speaker 3 (37:07):
In Ohio kind of a local guy, the autism Dad
on Instagram is a dude who's just he's great at
at being a calming presence in the world of like
dealing with kids with autism, do with adults with autism,
and so for this is kind of in reactions the
same shirts, and kind of in reaction to the past
month the absurd re claiming that autism has anything to

(37:32):
do with dacinations, which is a totally debunked total it's nothing,
it's it's garbage, it's nothing.

Speaker 2 (37:37):
It's been completely debunked by anyone that matters.

Speaker 3 (37:39):
But we have heads of state microphones saying that it
might have something to do with it, which it doesn't.

Speaker 2 (37:45):
So anyway, this month we're donating.

Speaker 3 (37:48):
The profits to a walk for autism awareness that they're doing.
But the merch stuff is like great and I love it.
And also then it'll go weeks and just like I
lose the threat, I forget to do anything with it.
I don't promote it and I don't do anything else
with it.

Speaker 1 (38:03):
So I.

Speaker 2 (38:05):
Don't know how else I will.

Speaker 3 (38:09):
I will I will softly commit to working harder at
focusing so that I can get some of these things done.

Speaker 2 (38:15):
I would love to have a podcast going.

Speaker 3 (38:17):
I would love to have some of this stuff gone
because a lot of my social media is kind of this.
Someone told me one time that the Yulanda Beef was
like the Kelsey Bowl, the super Bowl that the Kelsey
Brothers played in, because there are really no losers, Like yeah,
it's competitive way, you.

Speaker 1 (38:31):
Know, and they're there for the story not the score.

Speaker 2 (38:34):
Truly.

Speaker 3 (38:35):
I like social media being that way. I like when
my when my social media presence is kind of a calming,
fun place.

Speaker 2 (38:41):
I also just think that when.

Speaker 3 (38:43):
They're fascists in charge, you have to say out loud
their fascists in charge.

Speaker 2 (38:46):
Yes, have a hard time not doing that. But I
kind of feel like I could do that, Like you're saying.

Speaker 3 (38:51):
I could be a little more current, a little more
honest as far as like the language that I use
and the approach that I use on you know, a
podcast or you Jennthon like that, and then I'll save
Instagram for the important stuff like hair and nails, agree.

Speaker 1 (39:06):
Because that's the best part. There's only like seventy four
different platforms for whatever it is you're feeling like doing,
because you could twitch, or you could do any number
of things where people would love to show up and
just kind of like chitchat with you. Can't tell you
the thrill I get whenever I'm watching some of my
favorite creators on a live and I'll send them a question.
They're like, oh, yeah, hey, great question. Let me da
da da da da. That is engagement. Like it I

(39:28):
know I'm not in the room. I get that feeling, though,
and it's just like over the moon, especially for people
who look to people like you. I don't want to
put any pressure on you specifically, but like, I want
to learn to do these things for my kids because
it looks like you're really caring dad, and I want
to be that kind of dad. But I'm honestly struggling
with getting past my childhood and those kind of things there.

(39:50):
I don't feel comfortable, I don't feel I'm good at it.
Any number of reasons I can come up with to
not do the thing, I get it. It's not judgment
and it's just like, hey, I see you because I
promise you. I deal with that too, the same thing
with your add I've had a couple of friends reach
out to me and ask me very pointy questions like, look,

(40:11):
I don't know I've never been diagnosed. I know I
deal with things because I have Instagram, so I can
tell a lot of these symptoms seem very familiar. So,
and you're right. Having a producer like the one that
I've got is wonderful because she sets very clear deadlines
for me. I need this many episodes in the tank

(40:35):
by this date. Is that doable? And I can do
it in small bites because if I can get everything
in small bytes, we're golden. Whenever I start thinking about
this monolithic I can never even think of getting past
this obstacle freeze, executive dysfunction. The whole thing just grinds
to a halt. Being able to have someone who knows

(40:57):
your production style is great so they can sort of
like guide you through it without telling you how to
do it, because then I get all bucked up about
that too. It's super And the thing that I found
in working in the social media stuff that I do
is that if you take a little time off because
you need it, you'll just be that much more delicious

(41:19):
when you find another streak to enjoy because people are like,
oh my god, we're so glad you're back. Well, that's
a nice thing to say, and like, you've got a
life man, like you've got kids, and you've got the
booze business, and you've got all of the other things
that are like weighing on your mind and heart. And
so I think that a lot of people go, yes,

(41:40):
they definitely want their hit of Jay Gregg as often
as they can get it. Sometimes folks just got to
realize that this is made up and my real life
is happening over here, and so y'all give me a
little grace and I'll come back here ready to really
give you something instead of just struggling or running or scramble. Nah,

(42:01):
nobody loves to see that. Everybody knows it's happening. It's
cool and sometimes, honest to God, the struggle video puts
people so much more and he's like, Okay, good. This
is somebody I feel familiar with because I've seen him
on my camera or on my phone so much, and
he deals with the same kind of stuff. He's got
a sassy four year old, he's got a two year

(42:22):
old that, yeah, she's gonna cross conquer the world totally.
That's so relatable. And it's just the authenticity, the sincerity,
and just again finding the time to do it because
I know your plate is so full.

Speaker 3 (42:36):
Well, I appreciate saying all day and I yeah, I
mean I think that it's I just gotta get back
on the horse.

Speaker 2 (42:43):
I don't not to back on it. I just gotta
get on the horse.

Speaker 3 (42:45):
I gotta I gotta get in the game, off the bench, whatever, whatever, phra.

Speaker 2 (42:54):
Ain't nothing too but to do it. I guess it
is the next step for me. That's it.

Speaker 1 (42:57):
Well, and that's just it. I don't want to push
because I know I like again, I buck up. What
I do want to say is I leave the door
wide open because I love your voice. I love what
you've got to say about it, and just the entire
packaging and the whole thing just makes me feel so
solid whenever I get to watch and enjoy it. It's
really aspirational in a way, not to not to blow

(43:19):
you up. I'm not trying to make you feel uncomfortable or awkward,
but it's like, yeah, good, this is what's going on,
and I dig it. It's good to know that there
are people out there who are crushing it and it's
not easy. Every single day. Sweet cool, great, and.

Speaker 2 (43:33):
I appreciate that's that's really it's Penci coming from you.
That's that's really kind. I really appreciate that thing.

Speaker 1 (43:38):
You got it, Bud. And now remind me again there
were some some some scuttle on the internet about your
eyelashes at some.

Speaker 2 (43:44):
Point of a hit.

Speaker 3 (43:49):
Yeah, and it's this is just you know, I think
that one of my one of my skills is that
I can take any compliment in terms of the into
a critique. You know, that's just me, right, But I
think that it's perfect. I think it's perfect. I think
it's it's it's cosmically exactly right that a people are

(44:11):
commenting on this thing that has a feminine history to it, right,
like I mean, it is certainly when we talk about
gender roles, a lot of people have not spent a
lot of time and throughout history talking about men's eyelashes.
I don't think, but b it's something that I can
really do nothing about, or I mean, I guess I could,
but I don't do anything about it. As much effort
as I put into my body and my face and

(44:33):
my teeth and my belly and whatever, my hair, whatever.

Speaker 2 (44:35):
Else, the eyelashes literally just are. They're just the way
the Good Lord made them.

Speaker 3 (44:41):
And I frankly love the fact that the thing that
stands out to people I have zero control.

Speaker 1 (44:47):
Over exactly, I have no control. And I love that
you say that, because that's it, like all these other
kind of things.

Speaker 2 (44:53):
You know.

Speaker 1 (44:53):
You can work on your physique, you can work on
your education, you can be a more literate or more
loquacious human being. Fantastic, They ain't Jack delle squirt. You
can do about an eyelash except by some more. It's
amazing And it's funny you say that too, because yeah,
they do have a bit of a like a feminine
connotation to them over the years and the history of again,

(45:15):
something that just grows out of our faces control. And
you see these guys again who have this incredible overwhelming
fear of being seen in any feminine light whatsoever, who
are trimming their eyelashes, which serve a biological purpose, a physiology,
physiological reason they are there is to protect your eyes

(45:35):
and mucous membranes. But because these people are so unbelievably fragile,
they would rather cut off these luscious eyelashes that serve
a purpose. So people don't think that they are filling
the blank with anything over in some sort of alpha
male bullshit.

Speaker 3 (45:49):
Yeah, yeah, yeah, the counterproductivity, the self sabotage overwa energy. Yeah,
it's just so much. It's so much work.

Speaker 1 (46:00):
It's so much work, Like it's I think of plate
spinning on dowels. You know, you've seen those tears of
those old, old old talent shows or whatever. You can't
stop use something somewhere always needs your attention instead of
just kind of like living in who you are and
you know, just try to be good to the people
who love you and love them back the best you can.
It's really not that hard. And all this other superfluous

(46:24):
nonsense is just taking away from that from people who
want it from you and quite frankly probably deserve it.

Speaker 2 (46:31):
So yeah, I think that's a great way to play it.

Speaker 1 (46:34):
Thank you, Bud. Now let's get into a little bit
of the real life fun. Like you know, these are
all amazing things. I love what you're putting out in
the world because I think people now more than ever
need to hear it from a dude. Awesome, Like tell
me more about what you get to do as far
as like work, work, like the Booze distribution. This sounds amazing.

Speaker 3 (46:55):
So around that time when I decided that I could
take a real break from performance and to make money
and provide for my family in a more financially secure
kind of way. I started working for Frankly, my family's company.
My brother in law and my cousin are entrepreneurs and
they've been working together for years and they've started a
couple of companies and they've helped other companies grow and recently,

(47:17):
well I guess this is two years ago now, they
were doing some They started a company called tag TG,
the Acceleration Group, and it's like a financial partner for
Spirits brand. So small time spirits companies that are trying
to you know, your local vodka maker is trying to
get in somewhere and they can't compete with the Titos
of the world, you know, or whatever, or the the

(47:38):
dose Cominos of the world.

Speaker 2 (47:39):
They can't. They can't compete with these big brands.

Speaker 3 (47:41):
And one of the ways that they are held back
from doing that is financially. When they you know, you produce,
you make your booze, you finally get the botle you want,
the label you want, and the boos inside that.

Speaker 2 (47:50):
You want, and you sell it and somebody says, great,
we love it. We want a.

Speaker 3 (47:54):
Thousand more cases of that, and you go, I don't
have any money to do that, and they go, well,
we'll pay you sixty days after you deliver those thous cases.

Speaker 2 (48:00):
And you go, I never gonna be able to do that.

Speaker 3 (48:02):
So the first step was as a financial partner there,
and then just through that and through kind of being
operations for that, and I came on that just as
like a salesperson, as an account manager, just helping out,
excuse me, just helping out with that. And then just
through entrepreneurship and innovation, we've ended up acquiring and helping out,

(48:23):
like in a more official capacity, a couple of different brands.
And so we've got a Bradshaw Bourbon, which is Terry Bradshaw,
his b He's the man behind it and it's his bourbon.

Speaker 2 (48:33):
And I spent last week with him, a couple of
days last week.

Speaker 3 (48:35):
And he's still just an absolute blast.

Speaker 2 (48:39):
I mean, he's he's a really fun. The second day
we were together, I was way too hungover from the
bourbon we had been drinking. I felt like garbage.

Speaker 3 (48:47):
And he spent the whole day shaking hands and signing
bottles and kissing babies and whatever. Like he was just
like unfazed, and I felt like a real trash piece
of hue at the time because he was he was
nailing it, not gonn not hold it together. So that like,
and that's been kind of you know, fun. It's the
business side of things, but really it always feels to

(49:09):
me like like an ensemble performance. Like we all it's
a startup mentality. But I always kind of bristle at
the idea of startup because it feels very like Silicon
Valley startup to me, and like tex startup and whatever.
Like there's an ickiness that can come with that, and
it's business, so I guess anyone can find anichiness with anything.
But what I really love about this is that it's

(49:31):
a really small team and it really is all hands
on deck.

Speaker 2 (49:35):
We figured out as we go.

Speaker 3 (49:36):
That's why I I've ended up with the title Director
of Operations, But really that's just because there were enough
things along the way that needed to get figured out,
and I was the one figuring out this group of things.
And so now I am in charge of production. I
oversee production and so but literally what that means is
finding bottles and finding someone that can print labels, and
finding cardboard boxes and get it all shipped to the

(49:58):
same place, and then finding the making sure we have
enough of the bourbon to get into those bottles, and
then you know, getting those bottles on trucks and getting
them out and so it's really it feels like a
small like a New York, like a small New York
show that goes, all right, we have an opening date.
We got to get open. So let's whatever, let's figure
it out.

Speaker 2 (50:14):
Let's get open exactly right.

Speaker 1 (50:17):
Well, we don't know if we're ready, but God knows
it's gonna be butting the seats in half an hour,
so we best get to it. Yes, you are, oh good, good, No,
I was gonna say, you're so well equipped for that,
because God knows, we've been in a million shows exactly
like that. You know, you work so hard and you
do your thing, not everyone's on the same page at
the same time, and you're just like, well, the lights

(50:37):
go up, the curtain parts in a way we go.

Speaker 2 (50:40):
Exactly, yeah, exactly, what's really funny?

Speaker 3 (50:42):
And you know what, like it sounds a little high horsey,
and I will say I'll get on a high horse
for just a second, because one thing I've realized is
that in this kind of production is dealing with a
lot of a lot of other companies, a lot of
there's a lot of people that I and other you
know whatever. There's a lot of other business industry people
to deal with, and not to a person, but a
lot more than I expected to find.

Speaker 2 (51:04):
Is a lack of work ethic.

Speaker 3 (51:06):
And like I'm talking like I thought I frankly, I
always thought that I was moderate to low as far
as the work ethic goes, because you meet performers and
you deal with people who are just just type A
like it's it's all work all the time, and it's
got there's perfection on the table here.

Speaker 2 (51:22):
And I was always kind of like, we'll make it.

Speaker 3 (51:23):
Good, We'll do our best, you know, but like there's
got to be time for some life or whatever.

Speaker 2 (51:28):
And now I'm realizing, like, oh that is.

Speaker 3 (51:30):
There's there's a there's a dearth of work ethic in
a lot of these in a lot of industry spots
out there, And frankly, that has taking some real mindfulness
and some real work to get around that because it
drives me bonkers and I hate it so much. And
then I realized, like, all right, well, now I'm starting
to sound like the asshole around here, So let's pull
it back and let's see if we can like help

(51:52):
everyone along here.

Speaker 2 (51:53):
But because the truth of it really is like, man,
just just do your job on time. It's driving me
crazy weight. We have an opening night. Whether you like
it or not, people are gonna be butting sinks. We
got to get this done. So it's been a it's.

Speaker 3 (52:05):
That has been a learning curve for me to chill
out and not be you know, to on on to
figure out how to communicate the urgency without an anxious
without an anxiety inducing urgency.

Speaker 1 (52:18):
Yes, and and I love that you say that because
it brings to mind the fact your expectations on yourself,
like general you are usually much much higher than everyone else's.
So whenever you come to the table with what you
consider to be a kind of like middle of the
road work ethic actually turns out to be a really
great work ethic whenever, especially whenever you take into account

(52:40):
your audience or whoever's close great at what we're gonna
do is be like, okay, super good. It's just nice
to be reminded of that so often, because whenever I
think I've got a middle of the road work ethic,
and then I get around a group of other people,
it starts to sort of settle in somewhere different than
my I had originally thought. Okay, cool. And I have

(53:02):
a tendency to get down on myself, you know, or
think lesser of me, which is not usually an issue
that I have. And then we just we assess it,
we fix it, and we keep plowing forward. Anytime you
want to be on a high horse on radical joy,
you said, up buckeroo, because you are always welcome though,
ride that steed as high as you like in his house.

Speaker 2 (53:22):
Well, I think that you.

Speaker 3 (53:24):
I feel like this is another way in which we
are kindred souls. Is like effort, you know, effort is
one thing, and work ethic is one thing. But care
for care for a product, care for whatever is that
you're doing. Like I might not be the best at something,
and I'm there's plenty of skill that I don't have,
but when it comes to we have a job to
finish and when to finish that job, and we have

(53:46):
a deadline to finish that job, and there's.

Speaker 2 (53:48):
An expectation that goes with that job. I don't really
know anything that's not needing that.

Speaker 3 (53:54):
Like I don't know any other way, and that doesn't
always feel good. Sometimes it means stress, and sometimes there
are certainly things that I can work out on my
side that are still not at a you know, I
haven't perfected all of that, but I do know that
I have a drive to bring whatever is my best,
whatever that means, to bring my best to a thing
that I'm doing.

Speaker 2 (54:12):
And I think that's kind of the thing. Is like
you get down, like you specifically jams.

Speaker 3 (54:17):
You might get down on yourself because you have high
expectations for yourself and high expectations for the thing that
you want out there for you want whether it's a
product or whatever, it is just an energy, whatever it.

Speaker 2 (54:27):
Is you're putting out there.

Speaker 3 (54:28):
You know what good looks like, you know what great
looks like, and you want.

Speaker 2 (54:33):
To meet that.

Speaker 3 (54:34):
And it's easy to get down on yourself when you
feel like you're not hitting that target. And I think
my biggest problem and it's not just the Yeah, the
capacity to work is one thing I feel like I
can understand. I have a ceiling to my capacity and
I like trying to grow it, but there's always going
to be some ceiling to that. But the mentality behind
it behind and that comes from performance.

Speaker 2 (54:53):
I think a lot of it is like we don't
really know.

Speaker 3 (54:56):
We know that we had a one hundred dollar budget
to put the show together in the church gym York,
Like I don't know, I don't know how it's gonna be,
but I know we all care a lot about it
and we want to be the best that we can
make it.

Speaker 1 (55:07):
Yes, absolutely, And I have seen that show once or twice.
I have come to watch you in this show once
or twice because when you say that, Buddy, I can
almost smell the lambs, okay, Like I can feel myself
going down the stairs to go to the bathroom in
this before we start the show. Yes, yea theoretical No,

(55:31):
that is very much a real thing. This is not
some made up nothing.

Speaker 2 (55:36):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (55:37):
Yes, And I think and yeah, I'll never forget. At
the same place where we work together, I remember some
young lady that worked with us. She told me when
she's like I understand your problem, Bullard, and just right
off the cuff, it's like, well, please enlighten me because
clearly I am not getting the message. She's like, you
got too much give shit, she says, sometimes you got
to let that go. She says, I admire it. She says,

(55:59):
it's wonderful. It's a great thing to have. It's not
something a lot of people have in as much quantity
as you. And there are some things that do not
matter as much as you want to give to them.
Fix it. I was like, oh, yes, ma'am.

Speaker 2 (56:14):
Wow, she's right.

Speaker 1 (56:15):
Totally read me for phil in the best way possible.
And she was right. Sometimes, you know, and even if
I think I got a ton of it, some things
don't need our full blast. They just don't. And that's
okay too. That's another thing I'm learning. Gosh knows, the
older I get and the less stupid I become like, oh,
that's what she was talking about. This is literally one
of those moments, and I love it. So now, one

(56:39):
thing I want to make sure that we cover. We
have a very good friend. Jonathan introduced me to this man,
and I want to make sure that I give him
a huge shout out and a big fat watt of love.
Mister Sean Cleary, I'm sure he'll be listening to this
because he's just that kind of human being. He has
basically single handedly taken on a mantle of making sure

(57:01):
that anyone and everyone within the sound of his voice
or his reach knows all about women's rugby and I
love it. His enthusiasm is infectious. The kind of man
he is is fantastic, and I just want to make
sure he knows that we are thinking of him very
fondly right here, right now today.

Speaker 2 (57:20):
Absolutely so.

Speaker 3 (57:21):
Yeah, Well, I mean he brought us together. Well, I
guess I brought y'all. Yeah, it was. It was under
Shawn's guidance that we went to the NRL matches last.

Speaker 2 (57:29):
Year, the National Rugby League. Sean, it's kind of like us.

Speaker 3 (57:32):
We're from Alabama and we've you know, we've lived our lives.
Sean is from two Womba, Queensland, and he's a I
think that's more like the South of the world, right.

Speaker 2 (57:40):
Uh.

Speaker 3 (57:42):
He brought with him to America his love of rugby,
and I think it's kind of the same thing as
doing here in any of this stuff.

Speaker 2 (57:48):
It's a love of sport. It's a love of rugby.

Speaker 3 (57:51):
And there is now the women's elite rugby league in
the w R and there's a New York team, the
New York Exiles, and he is You're right, he is
passionate about it.

Speaker 2 (57:59):
Just as anyone would be passionate about the sport that
they love.

Speaker 3 (58:02):
And I think it's I think it's great. It's so
much fun, it's it was fun to watch with him.
It's been fun to learn from him. And again, like
with my add and my bandwidth, I have a hard
time always keeping up.

Speaker 2 (58:12):
I rarely keep up with the sports that I have
some of my life watching, so.

Speaker 3 (58:15):
Adding a new one in the logistics of it, and
you know, keeping up with it is sometimes tough.

Speaker 2 (58:21):
But Sean is great. He's a great fan guide.

Speaker 3 (58:24):
If anybody out there is looking for a new sport
to get into, the WDR and following Sean clear is
certainly the way to do that.

Speaker 1 (58:30):
And it is a beautiful thing to watch. Those women
are so good. They play as a cohesive unit like
nothing I've ever seen. The strength, the skill, the athleticism
is absolutely off the charts. And there are many, if
not all, of those women that I would rather, you know,
enter the ring with a bear than cross any of them.

Speaker 2 (58:52):
Yeah.

Speaker 1 (58:53):
Wow, just a grit, Yeah yeah, yeah, so yeah. I
want to make sure that we talk to him, you know,
make sure we give him a really kind hearted and
a big fat loving salute. Right here for radical joy
because he's amazing people. I don't know how to fit
this into the conversation, but I need for it to

(59:13):
be said. Whenever Jonathan I met, it was years and
years ago, and shortly after that we both got into
fitness pretty deep.

Speaker 2 (59:21):
Now.

Speaker 1 (59:21):
Jonathan also did a lot of instruction whatever, and I
remember there is a photo shoot if you go deep
enough into his socials, he looks like a feather plucking
superhero and the lighting in the shadow he is but
ass naked, but you can't tell because it was very
tastefully done. And I was like, wow, this guy. Cause

(59:43):
you mentioned earlier about making sure that you devote the
time that you need to things that make you feel
like a better human being, a little bit more in
control of whatever, or things that you really enjoy doing,
and fitness is among them. And I'm just like, yes,
And to be fair, I know that took a lot
of effort. I think a lot of the most important
things in our lives do take an effort on that level,

(01:00:05):
and the things that you do show that you have
invested that kind of work, ethic and effort into them.
The way you raise your children, the way you are
a partner and husband, the way you are an incredible friend,
the way you are an employee as well as director
of operations. So many of these comes together. They are

(01:00:25):
all their own separate entity, and yet they all are
so similar. It's just literally copy and paste and operating system.
So that you know that I'm not spinning plates. There
are one plate on one dowel, and all you got
to do is just make sure it stays on top.
And I think you do a great job of all

(01:00:45):
of that. Just so I know, pump you up a
little bit. I'm like, hey, if you're starting to feel
a little bit wobbly, if that plate starts to wiggle
a little unpredictably, you hit me up. I will definitely
want to know what it is I think you're doing
well and where we might be able to explore some
other options.

Speaker 2 (01:01:05):
I mean, that's you know.

Speaker 3 (01:01:07):
The contact that we have is frankly selfish as much
as anything else.

Speaker 2 (01:01:14):
Because you make me feel great. Man.

Speaker 3 (01:01:17):
You always have a perspective that makes me feel great.
It's fun to be around you, and it's fun to
see you as aspirational as well. But it's frankly it's.

Speaker 2 (01:01:23):
Selfish because you just make me feel really good.

Speaker 1 (01:01:26):
Good. That's what I want, because I tell you, I
admire you.

Speaker 2 (01:01:29):
I do.

Speaker 1 (01:01:29):
I think a lot of you. I think very highly
of you. I have ever since I really got to
know the kind of person you are. And that continues
to show up, and it continues to prove me right.
And sometimes I get hurt by the folks that I
put a lot of faith in. And I promise you,
at every step along the way, you've shown me exactly
the kind of person I thought you were, and you
just keep building. So well done, friend. I look forward

(01:01:51):
to seeing what comes next for you in the world.

Speaker 2 (01:01:54):
Thank you, ma'am. I really appreciate that. And yeah, it
feels a little holder to say same. Sis. I'll take it.

Speaker 1 (01:02:03):
I'll take it. Ladies and gentlemen, thank you so much
for joining us here at Radical Joy. Jonathan. Thank you
for being our guest here today. You are a ray
of sunshine and a whole lot of our meat right
here for us on Radical Joy. We appreciate you, buddy.

Speaker 2 (01:02:18):
It's my absolute pleasure. Man. This is great.

Speaker 3 (01:02:21):
I like it selfish, I feel great now. I'm gonna
spend the rest of the day is feeling great.

Speaker 2 (01:02:24):
So thank you absolutely.

Speaker 1 (01:02:26):
If this is your first episode of Radical Joy. Welcome man.
You could not have picked a better time to come
on up in here and say hi. Especially for anybody
out there who consider themselves a dude, Welcome, Come join
the club. We're gonna bread here, and we're gonna paint nails,
we're gonna cut grass, We're gonna smoke all the damn meat. Yes,
if this is not your first episode, welcome back.

Speaker 2 (01:02:47):
Friends.

Speaker 1 (01:02:47):
Thank you so much for putting enough faith in us
here at Radical Joy and CEOW Studios to spend your
very valuable time here with us every single week. If
you're the kind of person who loves to leave a review,
please do so. Leave us five star on whatever platform
where you're listening, send us a screenshot. We would love
to send you some swag. Chances are it's going to
be a sticker that you can put on a journal,

(01:03:08):
or a water bottle or a laptop, anywhere you'd love
to stick a sticker. Season three is come with a
brand new look, and we would love to update whatever
you've got going to make sure that the important people
in your life know what it is you're doing whenever
you're listening to podcasts. As always, friends, welcome. Thank you
so much for listening, and please never forget just how
much we love y'all. Thank you for taking time to

(01:03:36):
share a moment of joy and hope with me. We're
so grateful you're here. If this is your first time,
take a moment to check out our archive. See if
there's something else in there that fires you out rekindles
the joy in you. Hey, spread the word. If you
got something out of being with us today, we welcome
your thoughts and suggestions.

Speaker 2 (01:03:51):
Now.

Speaker 1 (01:03:52):
I rarely run out of things to talk about, but
if there's something I haven't covered that's on your mind
or heart, I want to hear from you. To learn
more about me and see studios, follow the links in
the show notes. Hey, don't forget. When you leave Radical
Joy a review, be sure to send us a screenshot.
We'll send you some kick ass swag to show our gratitude.
I am not a therapist or a medical professional. If

(01:04:12):
you're experiencing a mental health emergency, please call nine to
eighty eight to reach the National Crisis Lifeline. This content
and other content produced by CLAU Studios and affiliated partners
is not therapy, and nothing in this content indicates a
therapeutic relationship. Any opinions of guests on this podcast are
their own and do not represent the opinions of James
or CLW Studios. Please consult with your therapist or see

(01:04:35):
what in your area if you're experiencing mental health symptoms.
Everything in this podcast is for educational and entertainment purposes.
Only have a great one and we will see you
next week for another dose of radical joy love.

Speaker 3 (01:04:47):
Y'all down to

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“Paint Nails. Punch Nazis. Pack Lunches.” – Redefining Dad Goals with Jonathan Greg

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.css-14f5ked{margin:0;word-break:break-word;display:-webkit-box;-webkit-box-orient:vertical;box-orient:vertical;-webkit-line-clamp:2;overflow:hidden;}“Paint Nails. Punch Nazis. Pack Lunches.” – Redefining Dad Goals with Jonathan Greg