The Sweet Spot of Struggle: Where Hard Meets Heart

Growth lives in the grit. 💪🌱  Life is hard. Staying stuck is hard. Chasing dreams is hard. So… which hard are you gonna pick?  

This week on Radical Joy, we’re diving into the sweet spot of struggle—the place where the hard stuff doesn’t just test you, it transforms you. From French cheese to Dutch drama, this episode is about choosing the hard that actually grows you.  

Here’s what we get into:

🌍 Culture shock with a French twist
🧀 Brie-lliant lessons from a $12 cheese block
😅 Fail fast, fumble forward, grow anyway
📖 Flops that secretly fuel fierce growth
🗣️ Dutch drama: tongue-tied and tested
🚲 Training wheels on adult life (wobbly but worth it)
📝 Dreams in bold ink, not buried in your brain
🔥 When childhood hopes don’t fit grown-up realities
🎁 The universe’s sneaky habit of slipping you gifts  

Because in the end, the sweetest struggles aren’t the ones we avoid—they’re the ones we choose. 💥  

👉 If this episode sparked something in you, share it with a friend who’s standing at their own crossroads, and don’t forget to hit subscribe so you never miss your weekly dose of Radical Joy. 🌱✨

Become a supporter of this podcast: https://www.spreaker.com/podcast/radical-joy-with-james-bullard--5644728/support.

🌹🧡🟡🌳🔷🟪🤎🖤❔  ❤️🍊🟨💚💙💜🟤🖤❕❕
Take care of yourself, take care of each other, and breathe!  
❤️🍊🟨💚💙💜🟤🖤❕❕  🌹🧡🟡🌳🔷🟪🤎🖤❔  
Got something on your mind? James never runs out of things to say, so tell us what you want to discuss!   

Remember there is no shame in joy or for asking for what you need.  

Leave a review, send us a screenshot, and we’ll mail you a sticker! See you next FRIDAY for another dose of Radical Joy.  

James is not a therapist, but you’re not alone. If you're in crisis, call 988 for professional help.  

For non-emergencies, Psychology Today can connect you with support and therapists who fit your needs.  

This podcast and CLW Studios content are not therapy or a substitute for it. Guest opinions are their own.  

We're here for insight and encouragement but always seek professional support when needed.  

This episode was Produced and edited by Kerri J of CLW Studios

Episode Transcript

Speaker 1 (00:01):
Hello, friend said, so happy to have you here with
me today at Radical Joy. If you've been here before,
welcome back. If this is your first time with me,
well I'm glad you're here. Each week, I'm here with
you talking to myself about things that weigh on my
mind and heart, hoping if you're dealing with something similar,
we can adjust our perspectives as you listen. Hey, if
you're struggling with something that needs immediate attention, please note

(00:23):
and help us available just on nine eight eight nationwide
in the US to reach a mental health and suicide
crisis hotline. All of us here at CLW Studios believe
that mental health is a vital part of our well being.
The more people I meet and the more places I
co the more I realize how important it is to

(00:44):
make people aware of the fact that there is no
shame in enjoying the parts of our lives that are incredible.
It's time for some Radical Joy, and this week, the
three fingers pointing back at me are for choosing You're difficult.
I had the most wonderful experience recording an episode yesterday
with a couple of very good friends of mine. One

(01:05):
I've known for years and the other. I've known only
a short time, but I've grown to love her very
very quickly. And while we were having our chat here
for Radical Joy in the soon to be upcoming episode,
she mentioned something that struck a chord deep inside of me,
and I wanted to expound on that today, just you
and me. Her and her husband made the move to France.

(01:26):
They had been planning for years about a move abroad.
They were doing their homework. They were making spreadsheet after spreadsheet,
checking things like cost of living, health care, taxation, retirement,
what to expect in the golden years in certain parts
of the world, And after they'd done sufficient homework, they
came to the decision that France was going to be

(01:47):
their new home. Getting to talk with them about that
experience and the upsides as well as the challenges was
a very fulfilling experience and something that she said during
that she mentioned the fact, she says, you know, you
can stay in the United States and face difficulties there
because they're familiar, or you can move to a dream

(02:10):
location to fulfill something that you have wanted for as
long as you can remember, and there will be challenges
there as well. But what it really comes down to
doing is choosing your difficult. Now she had a different
phrase for it, but I think in order to try
to avoid a comparison, what I'd like to do is
just sort of offer that phrase. Instead choosing your difficult,

(02:32):
we can choose to stay in something that we are
relatively certain isn't serving. Though it is the devil you
know versus the devil you don't, And though I don't
love thinking about that, because it does have a connotation
to it, I think it's apropos and that so many
people have so many reservations about facing the unknown. I

(02:56):
think we all have a certain level of anxiety or
fear whenever we have to face something like that. I
know I do. I don't like being not great at anything,
and we've talked about this on many occasions. I love
stepping into something and having a natural affinity or talent
for being able to do it, because then that way

(03:17):
it doesn't make me feel less than or or lack
of or a failure or any of these things, these
other things that please understand, I'm not doubting myself when
I say these things. I'm just trying to be as
honest as possible as I can with myself as well
as with anyone listening. I live a very full life.
My self esteem and self confidence are pretty solid, and

(03:39):
in that I would like to say that I can
also healthily acknowledge whenever I'm not great at something, I
can acknowledge the fact that it makes me feel a
way that is often not gracious to me. Because everybody
needs to be able to just fail in needer to
in order to be a more effective learner. I want

(04:02):
to be really good at being wrong. I read so
many of these self help and self improvement things all
over articles, books, posts, whatever. I follow creators that are
definitely those things that move along, move you along your
journey with purpose and intention. They they clarify how I

(04:23):
need to see myself as well as other people. I mean,
look what we're doing here today together, you know. And
so many of those that they're talking about, especially among
the wealthy, those among the financially successful, they rarely see
failure as anything other than an opportunity for aggressive learning.
And for those of us that were not raised with

(04:46):
that sort of mindset, we love being good at the
things we're good at, and often we may not try
new things because we have a set of things in
which we excel, and so we don't necessarily adopt new
hobbies or passions because I've already got these things that

(05:07):
I'm good at, and I like those things. I like
feeling comfortable in my excellence in these parts of things. Great, Yeah,
I can one hundred percent can relate to this. I
love being proficient. I love being helpful, and I think
that if I stick to the things I'm good at,
I can help others also become better at those things

(05:28):
if they haven't reached the level of proficiency where I
like to think I sit great. My question is this
what happens when I want to learn something new and
it isn't just second nature. I can choose my difficult, Okay.

(05:49):
I can sit in the difficulty of knowing that I
have a very specific and finite set of skills where
I excel and that is somewhat difficult because I'm not
growing and me feel somewhat stationary and or sedentary. Or
I can choose the difficult where I continue to move
along my life's pathway, growing into the next era of

(06:09):
whatever that is for me, and suffer through being not
great at something or dealing with the unknown, which is
in and of itself very scary. Depending on who you
are and how often you practice jumping into the unknown,
that can be a very I want to say, it's
a hesitating experience. It gives you pause instead of continuing

(06:34):
with the inertia and the speed to which you've probably
grown accustomed to moving through your life, and now you
have to slow it down. You got to take baby steps.
You've got to put those training wheels back on the vehicle.
Because we're not in a place where we are proficient

(06:55):
or excellent or even expert level for some of us,
depending on the topic. So what does that look like
whenever we really start to zoom in or zoom out,
as the case may be, whichever's most helpful, whatever makes
the most sense, makes it more comfortable for us in
order to continue the growth my language journey. We talk

(07:20):
about this often because honestly, it is one of the
largest banes of my existence right now. I would love
to think that I'm good at languages. I'm proficient in
a few, and I enjoy that part now fluent. I
used to think I was close to fluent in a
couple of them, and then I got to travel to
those native countries and perhaps not. It's also one of

(07:44):
those things where if you don't use it, you lose it.
You must practice, you have to stay on top of
your skill set if you want to maintain that idea
of proficiency or fluency. Okay, yes, great. My Dutch is
a constant and total hemorrhoid. It is such a pain

(08:07):
in my rear. I cannot even begin to tell you,
because I am constantly surrounded by people who have been
speaking it, either since birth or for more than the
last decade. And see here's where the difficult comes in.
I can choose to stick to my mother tongue because
ninety percent of everyone who lives here speaks English very

(08:30):
very well. Or I can choose the difficult path, the
more difficult path, and struggle for months in order to
become proficient and hopefully eventually passable to show the folks
in my community that I'm serious. Whenever I say I
want to be a part of this community, that means
that I want to not only speak my mother tongue,

(08:51):
which everyone here also speaks. I want to be able
to move through circles and situations where Dutch is required,
or it would be much more comfortable because I am
in the vast minority in a many of the circles
where I find myself. Now, how that looks to a
lot of different people have very different appearances, and I

(09:14):
understand see this is my idea of integrating into a community.
I've been gung ho about jumping onto a lot of
cultural experiences and phenomena here that have been wonderful. I
have eaten more dairy in the last eight months that
I haven't probably the last twenty years. The quality of
it is absolutely incredible, the flavor out of this world.

(09:36):
Not to mention the fact too that I think that
perhaps one of the reasons I did not enjoy dairy
as much as I did in the States is that
it was so much more expensive than it is here.
You can get a pound of a local farm grown
cheese aged to perfection here for around twelve bucks. I

(09:57):
did today, and I've been chewing on that hu the cheese,
and it almost like an apple. Like every time I
pass by the fridge, I just go buy an alex
crape off a bit or I take a little bite
or whatever. It is so delicious. Also, on top of
the cultural experiences like food, I am trying to be
a part of the community in festivals, or the pacing

(10:21):
of my own life, because the pace of life here
is so much slower, because hustle culture isn't a thing.
People here work to live, not the other way around.
Language is very much a part of the culture, and
I want that. I want to ingrain that in who
I am, because whenever I say I want to be

(10:44):
a part of this, that extends into being more than hello,
thank you, where's the bathroom? How much is the cheese?
And yeah, it's It's an indicator of my seriousness of
what I want out of my life and what that
looks like in this particular snapshot of this moment in time.

(11:07):
And I love this idea for me in the micro
and then what I want to do is sort of
zoom out for anyone and everyone listening, because I think
we all get frustrated in the fact that we had
ideas for our lives when we were younger, and our
eyes were full of hope and our hearts were full
of dreams, and though many of them hopefully came to fruition,

(11:30):
some of them did not. And what I would like
to do in those cases knowing that a dream that
you had whenever you were young and bright eyed and
bushy tailed. Can sometimes be a little well, it could
be a little dashing, meaning like like dashed against the rocks,
sort of dashing, Which is why we continue to offer

(11:52):
this idea of reassessment. We continue to come back to
these dreams and these lists of dreams, and I hope
we have them. I do. I hope we have a
physical list of dreams and hopes for the future, even now,
at whatever age anyone is listening, I hope we write
those down. I hope we all understand just how vital

(12:14):
a part that plays in making those dreams come to fruition.
Having a thing in our heads is wonderful, because that's
the sort of thing that keeps our hearts buoyant, keeps
us moving in the direction of what we hope to
accomplish in our very, very brief time here on this
beautiful earth. Writing it down gives it a concrete realness

(12:37):
that also gives you a chance to look at it outside,
outside our minds and our hearts, someplace written in a
very bold ink, I hope, one that really grabs your
attention so that it continues to permeate and become a
part of your psyche and who you are and what
you hope to accomplish with our very full time we

(12:59):
have here together. On that token, I would also like
to say that we look at those things every day
and checking with your heart what part of that continues
to burn when you look at these items? Yeah, which
one of these really gets you just lit up and
ready to run? And which of these don't. We are

(13:21):
constantly growing and changing. We interact with people and situations
that change our trajectory by minuscule amounts throughout every single
day of our lives. It makes all the sense in
the world that what I wanted so badly more than
anything else in the world at age eleven will no

(13:42):
longer serve a full grown man with a lifetime of
experience at forty nine. So expecting those dreams to give
us the same jitters and thrills thirty eight years apart,
that's just not wise thinking. Does that mean we give

(14:04):
up on that dream? Well, what it means is perhaps
we replace that with a different dream, with something that
an eleven year old loved and a forty nine year
old just doesn't want anymore. You choose because a dream
that was difficult to achieve at eleven. It's child's play

(14:25):
literally at forty nine. So we need to choose another
difficult because there is so much joy in the journey
and the struggle. It's not easy. And when we fall
on all these cliches that we continue to hear, it's like, well,
anything worth having is worth working for. Yes, absolutely, And

(14:49):
I would also like to say that I am still
completely and totally open to gifts the universe that I
did nothing to deserve except just not give up. She
stepped forward and she had something to give me that
I did absolutely nothing to earn except to continue to

(15:11):
contribute in faith and gratitude and works and questions, fascination
with a life that I am so incredibly blessed to live.
And whenever I feel myself welling up with this pride
and this emotion and this strength and this wonder the
best thing I can do to continue to transmit that

(15:33):
signal to the universe so she continues to gift me
with these wonderful, easy, abundant things, is thank you. And
I've got a list of things I would also like
to request. James, No, No, it's not it really really isn't.

(15:56):
It's not a snotty thing. To do. It is a
faithful thing to do. To know that the Universe in
her infinite wisdom and capability when I come to her
with a laundry list of things for me to think
that she is incapable of delivering literally everyone, if I

(16:16):
know how to ask, is arrogant on my part. We've
been talking about choosing a difficult. What I'd love to
do for the next however long we've got together is
choose your easy. And this is trickier than it sounds. Okay,

(16:39):
this is one of those things where in a day
I have a lot of hours. I reckon we all
do now. I have very specific claims to my time,
and sometimes I have the luxury of getting some free
time during a day, and some days I got absolutely
Jack Delle's quirt planned. Whatsoever, Those are the days where
I can come in here and I can work on

(17:00):
my art. I can work on my singing, my speaking,
my book. I can do any of these things, and
more often than not, I find myself sitting in front
of a Facebook or an Instagram or a Dicky Docky,
and I will spend an embarrassing amount of time entertaining

(17:21):
myself with something like that. Quote unquote learning, gleaning information
through storytelling, and these media platforms that provide such a
provocative and delicious way of connecting with your community. And see,
do you hear all these beautiful little terns. Afraid that
I'm using to just make excuses for sitting on my

(17:45):
rear and doom scrolling all day? Not all day, That
is definitely hyperbolic. But what I'm saying is time that
I could be spent using productively, learning, studying, practicing, creating.
Those are the things that my day deserves. Okay, light

(18:06):
a candle, change the color of the ink in your pin,
Go out and buy a pack of colorful pens. It's crazy.
I was doing a little rearranging, moving all of my
summer and spring clothes into storage and getting all of
the fallen winters out. And while I was going through
all of my storage and this, that and the other thing,
I found so many pins, hotel pens, gifted pens, just

(18:30):
these rainbow of beautiful writing and art pens that had
been given to me because people know I love a journal,
and they know that I'd love to go through a
color all the way to the end, and then I'll
either change the cartridge or I'll change the pen. It's
so nice being known so well. Choosing my easy means

(18:55):
I can either take the easy way out by scrolling
and wasting time and taking little cat naps and these
kind of things throughout the day. Hey, not discounting the
value of those Those things are fantastic and they have
saved me a whole lot of criminal charges over the
years that I've existed on this planet. I'm not knocking
on I'm just saying that I don't need to go

(19:17):
two hours in the middle of the day. Twenty minute
disco nap is more than sufficient. Choose your easy. Write
a list, make it to do list, and I know
I'm just as guilty as anyone. I want to go
through that list. Man, you want to talk about a
feeling of astomblishment, you tick off every one of those
bullet points in a day, and it does not have
to be twenty seven items. Friends, don't get it twisted.

(19:40):
Don't overlist yourself. Please be mindful. I'm talking about how
many hours we got in a day. It's not an
infinite number, and you can get a hell of a
lot done. Okay. My thing is I always overestimate the
amount of time it's going to take for me to
get something done. Anybody else out there have that's kind
of situation, Like I look at the list of things

(20:03):
that I need to do by x o'clock. Okay, well
we'll take this for an example. This morning, I wake
up at six am, and I study my Dutch and
I'm ready to do my journal, but maybe not journal
just yet because I want to get my coffee. Great,
and then I start chatting with someone online that I
haven't spoken to in a while, but we have this
really wonderful conversation, and I just justify it because I'm like, Okay,

(20:26):
this is the kind of nourishing conversation that I would
love to have with my journal, with myself, but this
is someone I trust enough to share something so deep
and intimate and scary, honestly private to share with another
human being, because it has an element of embarrassment or
shame to it for me, not for this person. And

(20:49):
I can open up and they can assuage every fear,
and they can almost chuckle at the fact that someone
like me concerns himself with those kinds of ideas and
worries and shames. And it's not that I feel belittled
or made fun of. It's that the idea is so

(21:10):
ridiculous to them that they giggle. They're not laughing at me,
they're laughing at the thought that a person like me
carries this as a burden or perceives it to be
so pick You're easy. Easy thing to do is put
that phone down and go ahead and pick up the

(21:31):
pen and do the journal. The easy thing is to
go ahead and pick up the book and read five
ten pages that you've been meaning to finish. The easy
thing is to return those text messages that have been
sitting in your inbox with that little red number. Pardon me,
red circle, white number, just hollering at you. Same thing

(21:52):
for emails. Man, You want to talk about a great
feeling returning and or completing every task in your email inbox?
Oh my god, what a feeling. Cheese and rice whah Yeah,
Rocky red ice came is pretty great. Have you ever
had a completely empty inbox? Rock and roller coaster? Choose

(22:18):
You're easy. In a world of passive learning, perhaps we
can try some action while still keeping it simple. That's
the thing. I think that we put a lot more
impetus and a lot more emphasis on I think that

(22:43):
our anticipation is what slows us down a lot. I
look at my to do list like, wow, that's a
lot of things that I need to get done today.
Also forgetting the fact that I have, you know, probably
ten hours to get all of these things done, more
than sufficient. Who else out there has something that they
transfer from to do this from to to do list,
and once they finally do the thing, they just get

(23:05):
irritated with themselves because it took minutes to complete. Right.
What I love to do is find to wait to
be productive easy. I find that whenever I put myself
into a routine of productive easy, I gain a momentum
behind it. I get a lot more stuff done, a

(23:26):
lot more things tend to come together for me whenever
i'm hon a role like that, And just like I
was mentioning earlier, when those things come together and good
things continue to present themselves to me because I have
proven that I can handle them, because I am a
boss man well in charge of all of those kinds
of things, and continue to get bigger and stronger in
order to take on larger burdens. She'll hand them over

(23:53):
more opportunity, more chance for growth, wealth, knowledge, wisdom fantastic
and when that happens, not if gratitude, thank you. Yes. Oh,
I was so hoping this was gonna be coming soon,
because I felt as though I'd moved into an era

(24:14):
of my life where I could handle it. Sure enough,
here we are, and I continue to get stronger and
smarter and kinder and more open. Openness is a thing
that I think a lot of us have a big
problem with, myself included. You know, I like to think
of myself as an open minded person. I'm also a
very quick to know person, not k and ow but no.

(24:37):
If you ask me something that makes me feel uncomfortable, unknown,
perhaps puts me in a or outside my own comfort zone,
chances are very good you're gonna hear me make an excuse,
or I might just refuse right out of the gate.
Am I proud of it? No? Do I know this
about myself so that I can work on it and
do better? Yes? Super To be fair, sometimes I feel

(25:03):
as though I would do better if I had just
a little bit of a wind up instead of a
smack in the head. I would like just a little
bit more of a warning. I'm coming to you with
a new idea, So I want you to be open
to this. I'm already on the defensive by you saying that. However,
it does prepare me for something. Also, chances are very
good that my assumption of whatever is coming, the anticipation

(25:26):
of the other shoe dropping to the floor, is probably
going to be significantly worse than whatever it is that
you're about to share with me. I like to think
of myself as a positive person, and I have a
very creative mind, and it usually blows things way out
of proportion, especially if you approach me with you're not
gonna like this. I'm already on high alert. All of

(25:49):
the red lights are flashing, I can hear the whoop
whoop in the background, and we are ready for def
Con eighteen thousand and then someone shares the thing with me,
and I'm almost pissed. I'll be honest, I like, seriously,
this was the lead up. So if you need to
know a way to handle me, manipulate me just a
little bit, hopefully for the good of all humanity and

(26:10):
not just to be a brick, I would recommend going
about it like that, definitely, And if it works for me,
I know it's got to be effective on more people. Too.
I think it just comes down to making choices and
sticking by them. Choose your difficult. We cover that in
the first part, and it's just like, Okay, what is
it we're going to do. Are we going to stay here,

(26:32):
buckled and do the things or are we going to
go someplace else and follow this adventurous spirit and something
we've always wanted to do and live a storybook life
that we always imagine far from perfect. No one here
is saying perfect. What we're saying is I always wanted it,
and now I can be proud that I was brave
enough to do it. Choosing me easy. It is easy

(27:00):
to sit there with your phone in your hand, or
staring at the computer screen or making another trip to
the refrigerator. That's me. It is also easy to change location,
like I'm sitting in my bedroom right now recording this podcast,
or going from going from here into the kitchen where

(27:20):
I have these beautiful exposed beams and these high ceilings
and this really cozy feeling, this zelle that we say
in Dutch, and I can do something different there. I
can journal in there with a cup of tea, or
I can work on my book and editing it. There
with a cup of coffee and a piece of fruit.

(27:41):
Or I can just walk out into the desk that's
in the walkway outside of the rooms in the corridor
and do something there that is productive, that changes my mindset,
changes my location. And it's not difficult. I didn't even
have to put on hard pants. All I had to
do was make a decision to do something else that

(28:03):
is easy, fulfilling, nourishing, cultivating the kind of man I
want to be and what I want to put into
the world. Whenever I've got that phone in my hands,
I can feel myself folding in. I can feel my big, broad,
strong shoulders start to round and stoop. I can feel
this proud, majestic head start to tilt on that neck,

(28:31):
and my whole world, what I once looked at from
a proud, broad chest and shoulder, neck and head looking
straight ahead and often in the horizon, has now collapsed
into this myopic version of the world seen through God
only knows how many lenses and how many biases, so

(28:51):
that I get exactly what somebody out there wants me
to see instead of looking for myself. Is that what
you want for you? That's not what I want for you.
That's not what I want for any of us, and
I am so excited for us to make those decisions
and work at being active easy so that we can

(29:16):
continue to build and grow on the amazing people we
already are. The reason I'm making that assumption is because
we're all sitting here together listening to this. I'm recording it,
you're listening. We're having a conversation across miles in time,
and I love it, and I'm so grateful that you're here.

(29:38):
I love the time we get to spend together. If
this is not your first episode of Radical Joy, welcome back.
If this is your first episode of Radical Joy, welcome Ah.
Sometimes I get caught up in the vernacular and I
just get so wound up, and I was like, did
I say that? How did I say that? To say? Right,

(30:01):
Let's try that again. If this is your first episode, welcome,
We're so happy that you're here. If this is not
your first episode of Radical Joy, welcome back, thank you
for so thank you so much for thinking so highly
of what we're doing here at Radical Joy with CW Studios.
It means the world to us. If you are the
kind of person who likes to leave review in order

(30:21):
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(30:44):
an avid listener to what we have to say here
at Radical Joy. I'm sending you into the week with
hopefully and absolutely fantastic mindset looking for new ways to
choose your Difficulty're easy, love y'all. Thank you for taking
time to share a moment of joy and hope with me.

(31:06):
We're so grateful you're here. If this is your first time,
take a moment to check out our archive see if
there's something else in there that fires you up, rekindles
the joy in you. Hey, spread the word. If you
got something out of being with us today, we welcome
your thoughts and suggestions. Now I rarely run out of
things to talk about, but if there's something I haven't
covered that's on your mind or heart. I want to
hear from you. To learn more about me and CLW Studios,

(31:29):
follow the links in the show notes. Hey, don't forget.
When you leave Radical Joy a review, be sure to
send us a screenshot. We'll send you some kick ass
swag to show our gratitude. I am not a therapist
or a medical professional. If you're experiencing a mental health emergency,
please call nine to eight eight to reach the National
Crisis Lifeline. This content and other content produced by CLAU

(31:49):
Studios and affiliated partners is not therapy, and nothing in
this content indicates a therapeutic relationship. Any opinions of guests
on this podcast are their own and do not represent
the opinion of Chains or COLW Studios. Please consult with
your therapist or seek what in your area if you're
experiencing mental health symptoms. Everything in this podcast is for
educational and entertainment purposes. Only have a great one and

(32:12):
we will see you next week for another dose of
Radical Joy. Love y'all,